#fuck this unsub for kidnapping our baby spencer

[writer-in-theory]

unknown targets — spencer reid

request: Where it’s a Spencer x fem! Reader, and they are married (the team loves them together). What if they had 2 kids (you can choose gender), JJ is the only one that knows about their kids because they didn’t want their kids to become targets to unsubs. One day while they are hunting down Scratch ( a little before Hotch leaves), and a letter gets sent to the team. It’s a picture of Spencer and the readers kids. Everyone is confused on who they are, which causes Spencer and the reader to tell them. It’s up to the team to find them  summary: the team gets a letter from scratch that includes an image of you and spencer’s kids. the problem? they were supposed to be a secret to everyone but you. pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader category: angst with happy ending content warnings: language, kidnapped children, overconsumption of coffee word count: 1.8k

summer of fics masterlist masterlist want to join my taglist?

It was the worst scenario Spencer could have ever imagined.

The moment you’d told him you were having a kid, he’d been petrified of this exact moment. Having little Florence in his life though made all the worry worth it. Then Nicky came along and Spencer was sure he couldn’t be happier. Your kids became his life, the very thing that made him so excited to go home at the end of the day.

You couldn’t believe your luck either. It was the perfect family, the happiest ending you could have ever pictured for yourself.

Then came the picture in the mail. All it took was one picture, one particular image to ruin everything.

Because when the kids were born, you and Spencer came to a tough decision. It would be better for the team to not know about it. The only person who knew was JJ because she’d helped you take the time off you needed while taking care of the babies. It had been to protect them, considering their parents were both elite agents in the FBI. 

Except now, one of the worst unsubs they’d ever tried to take down not only knew about your kids but had them somewhere.

So that was how you and Spencer stood in front of the team now, each of them passing around a photo of your kids holding hands with Mr. Scratch. 

“You have kids,” Emily was the first to speak up, handing the picture back to Spencer despite his quivering hands. 

“They were taken by Scratch. They were both in elementary school and the school said they got into a car that looked like ours,” Spencer explained nervously. He hadn’t been able to sit still since you’d gotten the call from your babysitter that the kids weren’t at the school, since speeding home and finding that picture taped to the door. 

That fucking picture, of Scratch holding onto two little hands, of your kids looking perfectly healthy but confused, a ghost of a smile on each of their faces beyond it. You could only imagine what he’d told them to elicit such a Spencer look from them—Smile for Mommy and Daddy, kids. We want to let them know Uncle Scratch got you okay. 

The thought curdled in your stomach, made you grip the skin there with such force you were sure your nails would leave little crescent indentations behind. Your husband watched you, hand hovering just over yours as he fought to consider what level of comfort you needed now and what you would actually want.

Because ever since the beginning, the two of you had rules for each other. Limit the outward shows of affection at work, partly to maintain a reputation and so no unsub would notice the obvious chink in both of your respective armors.

It was meant to protect you, but all you could think now was that it may have damned you.

Because here was your team, immediately launching into action when your explanation halted. Your team, having never met these kids before, were ready to lay their lives down for them you were sure. Derek grabbed a set of keys and announced that he and JJ would go to the school, to trace the exact path that led to your kids’ disappearance. Emily would continue trying to track Scratch from where they’d lost him before, every so often watching the two of you for signs of needing help. Penny would be scouring databases and networks, knowing Scratch couldn’t be working alone, not if he managed to get ahold of both of your kids so easily. Rossi and Tara would go to talk to witnesses, your babysitter, anyone who could give them a scrap of information you didn’t already know.

You and Spencer would both try to work too. You’d pour over the evidence, trying to keep your eyes off of that picture now pinned to a board with their names written in Spencer’s writing under it. You’d see the moment Hotch pulled your husband away, and you’d see the moment your husband returned with red-rimmed eyes and a determined look on his entire body.

Hotch would pull you aside too, guiding you to his office and shutting the door. “You need to take breaks, too,” he would remind you, sliding you a cup of coffee you already knew wouldn’t have nearly enough cream for your taste but appreciating the offering regardless.

“I’ll take a break when they’re found,” you answered, and Hotch didn’t seem surprised in the least by your reply. You fought to remind yourself that out of everyone here, he was the one who understood your struggle far too closely. His wife and child had been taken by an unsub too, though his had a far more gruesome ending than you were hoping for.

“Your kids need you at your best right now,” he told you, watching as you cradled the cup of coffee that would count as your fourth of the day. “You can’t be at your best if you burn yourself out.”

“Look, Hotch, every second I spend resting is another second they’re with him. I can’t—I can’t even breathe thinking about what’s happening to them.”

“That’s what he wants, you know.” And you did, fuck did you understand that. Hell, you were on the team of people who were supposed to understand unsub’s motives, of course, you would understand that Scratch’s motive was to send you and Spencer into a panic. If you were terrified for your kids, then you weren’t in the right headspace to catch him. He could get away with everything if he had that sort of leverage over you.

“Fuck,” you hissed, gulping down the rest of the coffee and setting it down on Hotch’s desk. You’d apologize for the language later, for the ring that was sure to form on his desk under the mug. “Fuck, you’re right. You’re always right.”

As you bolted out of his office to collect your husband, you were sure you saw pride in Hotch’s eyes—it wasn’t hard to imagine that pride was there simply for you.

Your relief didn’t come until a full twenty-four hours later. It was Tara who’d been able to put the pieces together, who was able to find the house your kids were being kept at. Even before you’d gotten there, you knew that of all the things you’d find there, Scratch would not be among them.

That had been the deal he’d sent you in the encrypted message. Let him get away, stall to give him time, and your kids would be returned to you. After your team had caught onto Scratch’s plan, after they were closing in on him, this message was the only thing that gave you proof your kids were still alright, that they still could come back from this.

That didn’t stop you from rushing into the house the second you could, the only person able to match your speed being Spencer himself. Your kids were in front of a TV, watching an old episode of Wiley E Coyote narrowly missing the Roadrunner.

The symbolism was not lost on you.

“Mommy! Daddy!” Florence was the first to notice you, not phased at all by all the vests and guns and people around her. She only saw you two, first sprinting to Spencer. You let out a quiet little cry as he wrapped his arms around her and scooped her up, hand on the back of her head and gently guiding her face into the crook of his neck so she wouldn’t see any more of the FBI’s greatest weaponry. She was still young, still innocent, still safe.

It was her happy cheer that alerted Nicky to the change. His head whipped around, surprise coating his features before pure joy spread there instead. “Momma!” He only knew a few words, but your name was one of them.

He toddled over to you, giggling brightly as you scooped him up and cradled him in the same fashion Spencer held his sister. You watched your husband then, smiling as he mouthed, ‘they’re okay’ as a reminder to both you and him.

You nodded. They were okay. Your team had done it. 

They would always do it, time and again. You knew this as Derek and Emily stepped over to Spencer, saying something to Florrie that had her laughing as loudly and sweetly as she always used to before this. You knew it in the way Hotch stood in the front door of the house, scanning the scene and always watching over you all. You knew it in the way Tara came to you, with a gentle voice and kind eyes as she asked Nicky what he wanted for dinner, because she and JJ would go get whatever those kids wanted and needed right now.

You knew it in the way your team, your family, came back to your house that night and slept in the living room, keeping watch over your kids as you all recovered.

At first, you’d been terrified of them knowing about your kids, terrified that by letting them in somehow you’d be damning your kids to the same fate you were sure you and Spencer were destined for. And yet, they’d been taken anyway. It was only letting the team know about them that ultimately saved them from that same fate.

So you and Spencer would talk about it, but the answer was already decided. You’d let them in, you’d trust your work family with your kids, and you would be all the better for it in the end.

GENERAL TAGLIST @samuel-de-champagne-problems @silverhetdanes @ssawonderland @reidsbookclub @katymarie @mrsobrien888 @writingquillsandpainpills @fightingdragonswithreid @lil-stark @raythefaye @stillsleepynat @this-is-doctor-and-its-calm @givemeth @foxy-eva @lilibet261 @exhaleli @darkeunology @nomajdetective @meggie-m00n @delicatespencer @serenity-lattes @goldentournesol @rexorangecouny @sultrypotter @reliefplease @mente-sindescanso @jj76889 @luna-novae @folkreid @nightmarewasteland @luredwithpretzels

ONESHOT TAGLIST @natashxromanovfreads @nano-noa

[writtentypo]

Solving cases with a 5 year old Reid (or atleast trying to)

uhm so I’ve never posted fics here so idk how this goes but uh..enjoy? i think? (this is also on ao3 if anyone wants to read it there) 

-

The case they were currently working on was particularly rough. They managed to figure out the unsub was somehow de-aging their victims back to around the ages of 7 and under. But they didn't have a lot to work with, unfortunately.

So far the profile they had on the unsub was: A white female, most likely with light brown hair, age ranges from 30-40, and has recently lost a child of some sort. 

“Any leads from the latest victim?” Hotch asks while looking over some of the files on the case.

“No, it seems that the unsub not only able de-age their victims but also put them into a childlike state of mind. So we weren’t able to find anything since the victim was about 2-3 years old. But also it seems the only reason the unsub basically disowned them was that they most likely didn't reach their standers. What I mean by that is they weren't the correct age and while the other ones probably died from failed experiments.” Spencer said while scribbling something down on the board.

“Alright then wheels up in 30.” 

After they landed they were able to figure out the unsub's name with DNA they found at the crime scene from the earlier victims they found. But at that point, it was too late. They had noticed that Spencer matched the unsub's victimology almost perfectly and told him to stay behind just in case while they figured out the identity of the unsub. He was a little reluctant too since he still wanted to help but obliged anyway. When they got the information on the unsub, turns out it was one of the pathologists working on the case with them. That was why they kept coming up empty-handed when reviewing the autopsy reports. The unsub, though, was getting sloppy, most likely due to the stress of trying to find another victim and missed a fingerprint that was on one of the victim's glasses.

 Spencer, at the moment, was at the morgue looking over the autopsy that the unsub had just handed to him. He felt a prick on the side of his neck and panicked while turning around, but it was a losing battle and he slowly started to lose consciousness. 

  Spencer woke up strapped to a table blinded folded, with tape over his mouth. Muffling any panicked noises or phrases he could make. He could feel cold air brushing over his bear chest, unable to move. When all of a sudden he heard someone talking to him but couldn’t make out what they were saying. Like he was under water with a massive migraine.

 He quickly started to whimper when he felt a shot of pain go through his arm. Recognizing it as a multitude of needles along it. The fear he felt at the moment made him feel nauseated. And the panic that had started to come to light mere seconds ago was only growing.

 The unsub(?) quietly goes to stroke Spencer's hair and he flinches back and whimpers hopelessly. The unsub continues saying comforting words (or what would be comforting words to someone else perhaps) like “mama’s here” and “it’s okay”.

 Then all of a sudden he hears a loud bang that follows with yelling and even louder gunshots around the room. And his heart rate picks up. He guessed he was most likely disoriented from whatever the hell the unsub had just injected into him. 

Then, like a switch has been flipped, the gunshots and yelling stop and the blindfold and tape are being taken off of him. His breath hitched and then he heard a familiar voice talking to him, but it almost seemed as if the person were trying to talk to a child and not an adult man.

“It’s alright buddy everything's okay now, we’re gonna get you to your mom and dad soon alright?”

Buddy? Mom and dad? What the hell was Morgan talking about? His mom was in the hospital and his dad left and there was no way in hell they were all getting back together any time soon. He soon realized his eyes were closed shut and opened them to see a concerned Morgan hovering over him.

But something wasn’t right, Morgan seemed different, he seemed…bigger? Way bigger.

“Morgan..?

Confusion and slight shock were written all over Morgan’s face when he said that and soon he started to undo the restraints on Spencer's body.

“Morgan, the unsub, they were talking to me. Did you get them? Is everyone alright? Is anybody hurt?” Spencer said hoarsely.

Shortly after Hotch came in with a couple of other cops to clear the scene.

“Hotch!” Spencer's voice cracked and he started to sit up and suddenly realized his pants were far too big for them to be his and his voice too high-pitched and childlike to think that he was the owner of it.

“Spencer?” Hotch said with a shocked/concerned look on his face, surprisingly different from the usually stoic face Hotch usually had.

“Reid what-“

“I’m pretty sure what happened to the other victims is what also happened to baby boy over here.” Derek quickly said after interrupting him.

Suddenly Reid felt a wave of embarrassment wash over him realizing he didn’t only look like he had just turned five, had been talking with the most high-pitched (not really) childlike voice ever but also was half-naked with obviously ill-fitting pants.

Hotch and Spencer stare at each other. The ladder with quickly reddening cheeks. 

Slightly hesitant Hotch starts speaking. “Alright, we’ll have the paramedics look him over for any injuries and talk about this with the rest of the team. Morgan, do you mind giving him your jacket and walking him over?”

“Not at all boss— Ready to go baby boy?”

“Oh uh, sure let’s go,” Spencer says while completely ignoring the fact Morgan had just called him baby boy.

[spencestyles]

Her

summary: the one where y/n is tired of being second to Maeve and Spencer needs to learn his lesson

pairing: spencer reid x BAU!femreader

warnings: angst

words: 3050

*not my gif*

~~~~~~~~~~~

To you, it had always been about her. What she did, how she looked, was all based on her. You wanted to make Spencer happy, but you could never compare to her.

"Spencer, I don't understand what I need to do," you yelled in frustration.

"There is nothing you can do y/n," Spencer yelled back. Your relationship had been going on like this for a few weeks. you knew about his past and knew about Maeve. Yes, Maeve, the girl Spencer will forever love. Within the past weeks, Spencer has become more distant from you. The five year anniversary of Maeve's death is right around the corner. Whenever this time of the year comes around, Spencer becomes heavily depressed. Every time, you just shrug it off.

"Spence, I want to help you," you said softly, exhausted from all the arguing. "Can I please help you." You worked at the BAU she joined shortly after Maeve's death. You immediately hit it off with the entire team besides Spencer. He was still different, as the rest of the team had told you.

"You can't help y/n," Spencer cried. "I just want Maeve back." Your heart dropped at the sentence. you had always felt second to Maeve, no matter how many times Spencer or the rest of the team denied it.

"I can't do that Spencer," you said calmly, trying not to anger Spencer.

"Then maybe you can start acting more like her," Spencer said angrily. "Maybe pick up a damn book instead of watching fucking Grey's Anatomy. Or maybe do something good with your life besides being pretty. I miss Maeve so much."

At this point, you were enraged, "Spencer, I am not going to change who I am because you want a dead person back. Do you understand how difficult it is for me to live through this every year? Every year you forget I'm your girlfriend and I'm alive."

"Shut up y/n. I will never love you as much as I love Maeve. You are just a filler in my life right now," Spencer screamed. You immediately began to grab her things to take to her best friend, Penelope's, house. Spencer realized what he had done and began to protest your departure from your apartment.

"y/n I didn't mean it," Spencer cried, but you were already out the door. You quickly made you way to the street when you realized you left your car keys in the apartment. You decided to walk to Penelope's as it wasn't far and you didn't want to walk back to the apartment where Spencer would be begging for his forgiveness.

As you walked to Penelope's apartment as quickly as you could, you began to feel a presence from behind. You began to walk at a faster pace, but the figure behind you was faster. Suddenly, you felt a pain in her head.

Then all you saw was darkness.

Spencer knew you would be spending the night over at Penelope's, so he didn't worry too much when you didn't come back to your shared apartment. He also knew Penelope was not going to want to talk to him, especially after what he had said. However, the next morning when he woke up, he felt uneasy. When he tried to call you, you didn't answer (not like you were going to). Spencer expected you to not answer after your encounter last night, but when you are angry you don't let the rings drag on like they had; you just cancel the call.

Spencer immediately called Penelope, "Hey Garcia is y/n with you?" Spencer heard shuffling.

"No, why?" Penelope asked. Spencer became frantic as he realized his beloved girlfriend was missing.

"Garcia we need to call 911 to the team, y/n is missing," Spencer said as he packed his bag to work and immediately ran to the car.

Once the whole team made it to the office, Spencer was worried what he would have to say to the team. He knew they would be pissed at him for what he said to you, they all knew it was a touchy subject to you. You had cried to the girls (as well as Hotch) about this issue many, many times. But they all also knew Spencer loved you, more than he loved Maeve.

"Spencer you called 911, whats up?" JJ asked.

"y/n and I got into a fight last night and she left and I thought she was going to Penelope's but she never made it to Penelope's and she isn't answering her phone," Spencer said in a rushed sentence. "It may not seem like a lot yet, but something is wrong. I can feel it."

"Now what did you two fight about?" Hotch asked sternly. You and Hotch had always been close. You had a close father daughter bond since your father died when you were a teenager.

"Please don't get mad at me. I know I screwed up," Spencer began. "But I said some really stupid things. I was in a funk last night because of the anniversary of Maeve's death and I said some stupid things. She was just trying to help me get better and I basically told her to her face she wasn't good enough. I told her I would never love her as much as I love Maeve."

At this point, Spencer had begun crying. However, the rest of the team had a mixture of shocked, disappointed, and pissed off looks on their faces. You were the baby of the team still, she was young and bubbly and she loved Spencer. Maeve was a tough situation for y/n and it eventually began to take a toll on the whole team. You would get insecure at the smallest things and had a hard time with stalker cases because of the connection to Maeve.

"Okay, this is now a running investigation," Hotch said. "We all know y/n would have texted one of us to tell us she was safe if she was okay. Spencer, my office now." Hotch was pissed. You, who was basically his daughter at that point, was missing and it was all because of Spencer. Spencer knew he fucked up, but Hotch needed to make sure Spencer knew if you were found dead, there was no way out for him.

"Spencer, I am not mad at you yet," Hotch stated calmly. "But let me tell you know and let me tell you clearly, if y/n dies because you decided to be a dick, you will not feel the end of it. We both know what it feels like to lose someone so close to you. I lost Hayley, you lost Maeve. And since then, y/n has been the best thing that has happened to both of us. So Spencer Reid, so help me god, if y/n is dead, your job will be a living hell. Leave my office now and put yourself to good use." Spencer gulped. He knew Hotch would be pissed, but didn't realize how pissed.

Everyone in the bull pin knew what had happened in Hotch's office. None of them felt bad. They knew Spencer couldn't continue to undermine the importance of you to Maeve, a dead girl. They knew how you felt, especially the girls. The countless nights you had cried to them about how you felt you would never be good enough for Spencer. They knew Spencer's constant mention of Maeve hurt you.

As Spencer walked into the bull pin, he noticed the stares. He knew they were disappointed, especially the girls. He knew Morgan would be disappointed because he was the only one who knew how much Spencer truly loved you. While you were crying to the girls, Spencer was over at Derek's trying to find ways to make it up to you, to find ways to prove to you that you were his one and only. Maeve was in the past, but sometimes her memory began to creep up in Spencer.

"Can everyone stop looking at me like a criminal," Spencer said to the team looking down. "I know what I said and I know you all are upset, but we need to find her please. I can't stand to know she may be dead and died thinking that I didn't love her. Because I do. More than I ever loved Maeve and I messed up. I need to save her." The team looked at Spencer with sorrow in their eyes. They knew he was right. They needed to stop holding a grudge and get to work. None of them could live knowing they didn't do everything they could to save you.

"Spencer is right, Garcia start looking at security cameras from the area we found y/n's phone," Hotch began ordering. "Reid I need you to make a list of everyone who you and y/n have been in contact with for the past few months. Everyone else, we need to start looking for similar cases and try to figure out a profile."

The whole team got to work. Spencer looked through his phone as well as his and y/n's emails. While looking through your emails he found a strange set of emails from an unknown email address. This was strange to Spencer, he knew you never kept anything from the team especially if it were to be suspicious.

"Garcia, I need you to trace these emails," Spencer said, walking quickly to Garcia's office.

"Reid did you find something?" Hotch asked.

"I'm not sure," Spencer replied. "But it's strange for y/n to have these emails in a separate file. It's like she didn't want us to find them."

"Or she wanted us to find them in a situation like this," Hotch said. "Garcia look into these emails now, we may have our unsub."

------

You laid on a musty mattress that smelled of human feces and blood. You couldn't remember anything. You knew what had happened to you, Spencer told you he didn't love you as much as Maeve and you walked to Penelope's house. By the looks of it, you never made it to Penelope's. Soon enough the figure you felt behind you on your walk was in front of you.

"Well if it isn't y/n y/l/n," the person said. "My name is Cat. Cat Adams. You are here because you are keeping me from Spencer. I knew that if I kidnapped you, Spencer would come looking and I'd get to see his beautiful face again."

"I know who you are, Cat," you said aggressively. "I helped put your ass in jail, but from the looks of it you escaped."

"That I did," Cat laughed. "Its easy when you're fucking the guards." You felt a gross feeling in your stomach. You knew what was going to happen to you, but you also knew if she died, she wouldn't die until she could see Spencer one last time.

Suddenly, you felt a sharp pain at the left side of your waist. You looked at Cat and who was looking at her straight in the eyes. Cat had won.

------

However, back at the BAU, Spencer knew something in the emails sounded familiar.

I love him more than you do.

He will be mine forever.

There was only one woman in your relationship together that would be this judgemental, Cat Adams. Spencer knew she too made your life miserable. The thought of Cat to you was almost as gut wrenching as the thought of Maeve. You knew Cat and Spencer had a strange connection, it would often worry you; especially when Cat would request to meet with Spencer.

"Its Cat," Spencer yelled. "Hotch its Cat Adams." Everyone looked at Spencer shocked. The team was never told of Cat escaping prison.

"I need to call the prison," Hotch said. "Garcia, start looking at Cat Adams whereabouts, aliases, or anything. I have a feeling Spencer is right." Garcia immediately started looking as Hotch called the prison.

"Spencer is right," Hotch said. "Cat escaped less than a week ago."

"I found it," Garcia screamed. "Cat is at a warehouse less than three miles from here. Go quickly and save my best friend." The team ran out of the building and sprinted to their cars. Spencer was nervous. He had a feeling in the back of his head that his girlfriend was dead.

Immediately after getting into the car, the team receives a call from Garcia, "Cat has a partner. His name is Jackson Donovan. He has a criminal record and its not good. Spencer I should also mention he is Maeve's brother. You know, your dead girlfriend." Spencer was shocked. He never knew Maeve had a brother, but he knew that you may not get out of this alive. And it would be his fault. The team arrived at the warehouse.

"Spencer you're not allowed in," Hotch said. "You are too close to y/n."

"Hotch that's so not fai-" Spencer began.

"Reid I'm not going in either." Spencer didn't listen and ran into the building with Hotch yelling behind him. Hotch decided it was no use and ran in also, he needed to see you alive one more time.

"Cat Adams and Jackson Donovan, FBI put your hands up," Morgan yelled. The sight they ran into was gruesome. You had been badly beaten. Suddenly, Spencer walked in with tears in his eyes. The love of his life was dying, you looked sick. You hadn't eaten in over a day, since you and Spencer had planned on going out for a nice dinner the night of your fight.

"Well if it isn't Spencer Reid," Jackson said. "The guy my sister couldn't stop talking about. I know how you must feel, the love of your life is gone and you need a good fuck. So you decide to go for the second best thing. She's a good shag, I'm not sure if you've been fucking her right though, shes pretty tight."

"Stop, please," you pleaded. For the first time, the team saw you true pain. You were broken. Not only had your boyfriend say he didn't love you, you had been mentally and emotionally abused by these two people who wanted to ruin Spencer.

"Shut up three," Cat laughed. "Spencer, do you like the name? Three. Do you know what it means?" Spencer shook his head. "It means that y/n is your third choice. You lost Maeve, you can't have me -well you could-, so you're stuck with her. She's nothing, she's the third choice. That's why she acts so strange. Did you know that at the beginning of your relationship she stopped eating to be skinnier for you. She always felt second to Maeve and me."

"Shut up Cat, please," you said hoarsely.

"Three, do I have to tell you again," Cat said. At this point the team was beyond confused, they needed either of them to do something in order for them to stop.

"Cat, come on let's talk about this," JJ said.

"I'll only talk to Spencer," Cat said with a smirk on her face. Suddenly, the team saw Jackson make a lunge with a knife towards you, angry that Cat only wanted Spencer. Morgan took the shot swiftly as Reid handcuffed Cat.

Hotch ran over to you, "y/n, sweetie, are you okay? What do you need." You began to close your eyes. "Hey, hey, hey, don't close your eyes. You're going to be fine. MEDIC! We need a medic now!" The team felt tears in their eyes as they saw the paramedics rush to tend to you.

"Hotch can I go wit-" Spencer started.

"Go Spencer, apologize." Spencer ran to the ambulance.

"She is my girlfriend, please let me stay," Spencer begged, the medics let him stay. Spencer grabbed your hand and looked at your half closed eyes. "y/n if you can hear me, I didn't mean anything I said. I love you more than anything. I love the way you can watch a show and tell me all about it even though I watched with you. I love that you can put up with me when I'm in my episodes and the fact you don't care that I may be a paranoid schizophrenic. I love that you listen to my rambles even if you have heard them before."

"Sir, sorry to interrupt, but is there any chance your girlfriend may be pregnant," Spencer thought for a minute.

Spencer's eyes shot down at you as he heard a loud breath, "S-S-Spencer, save the baby," you said between breaths. Spencer looked at you shocked. His girlfriend was pregnant and he didn't notice. He began to think back to before your argument and the things you said. "Spencer I have a surprise for you, I think you're going to like it." Spencer's heart dropped as he heard the heart monitor flatline.

"We need her in OR 3 now," one of the doctors said. "Sir, you need to go to the waiting room, someone will be out to give you an update soon." Spencer was stunned, his girlfriend and child may die and he would have to live with the guilt of not being good enough.

Spencer walked into the waiting room and saw the rest of the team, "Jackson and Cat are being held, any updates on y/n?" Hotch asked.

"They had to take her to surgery, she flatlined in the ambulance," Spencer said, his voice breaking. "She's pregnant." The team sat quiet.

"We all already knew Spencer," Rossi said. "Earlier in the day before you guys got into your fight, she told us. She was so excited and she wanted to tell you in the most perfect way."

"I told her to just come out and say it like Hayley did to me," Hotch laughed. "It caught me by surprise but was the most meaningful statement I'd ever heard." The team smiled at Hotch, but looked at Spencer who looked the worst he ever has. None of the team had seen him look this bad. Not even with Maeve. Soon enough, most of the team left. Hotch had to go to Jack and JJ to her kids. Derek had a date with his girlfriend and the rest of them needed their sleep.

"Spencer," Emily said. "Please text us when she wakes up." Spencer nodded, which was enough for both of them this late into the night.

Less than ten minutes later y/n's doctors came into the waiting room, "Here for y/n y/l/n?" Spencer stood up.

"Hi," Spencer said, walking over to them. "I'm her boyfriend."

"Well she is doing well right now, we were worried at first. She flatlined twice on the operation board." Spencer let out a breath he did not know he was holding.

"She was pregnant, what about the baby?" Spencer asked, hoping that y/n was still carrying their unborn child.

"The baby is being monitored, but it looks as if the baby is almost four months along meaning there is a low chance of the baby getting hurt. However, the baby was under a lot of stress from the abduction." The doctor began to show Spencer to your room. Spencer couldn't help but wonder if he caused any of the stress on the baby. The things he said most definitely caused you an enormous amount of stress.

As Spencer walked into the room, he couldn't help but shed a tear. You had wires around your body and you looked bad. Not bad, but like you were just kidnapped.

Spencer texted the team, y/n is out of surgery. She and the baby are okay. The team didn't respond as it was three in the morning.

Spencer heard shuffling next to him. He looked over at you and saw you move slightly, your hand moving to her stomach. For the first time, he looked over at your stomach and noticed you bump. He was shocked he hadn't seen it before, it was very prominent. Well it was what he'd expect for four months.

"y/n I know you most likely can't hear me or you don't want to listen, but I need you to know I love you" Spencer began. "You are the best thing that has happened to me, I know you always feel second to Maeve, but she is a part of my past. You y/n, you are my present and my future. I confided in you when I was at my lowest, when I was in jail you were there. You and our baby. Holy shit we are going to have a kid." Spencer paused when he heard a giggle. He looked over to y/n, she had a smile on her face.

"Hi" y/n said.

"Oh my God you're awake" Spencer said with tears in his eyes. "I thought I lost you."

"You're never getting rid of me" y/n giggled. "Actually, maybe if you act like that again. I will leave you and take your child." You glared at Spencer, remembering why you were in this situation.

"I'm sorry about what I said to you," Spencer cried. "I love you, I love you so much. I'm going to do everything for this baby and everything to make this up to you."

"You better."

[ithehellisbucky]

forget me not

spencer reid x reader

Request: No

Word Count: 3.5k

Warnings: Kidnapping, torture, drowning, murder, drug mention, etc

Summary: You and Spencer don't realize you love each other until it's almost too late

Author's Note: First thing in like fucking forever, so yeah. This was originally a request and then I was at school and I couldn't look at my request so it was way off script, so I just did my own shit, this also takes place in the 5th season, in the middle just after hayley dies.

~

"The unsub is a white male between the ages of 35-45. His modus operandi is drowning in the great lakes, he's already struck Superior, Michigan, Ontario, and Huron, so we expect Lake Erie to be next." Hotch says, glancing at his phone every minute or so. It's his third case back since Hayley died, and he's picked up a habit of waiting to hear bad news.

"This unsub has recently developed a hallucinative disorder where every face he sees has an emotional connection. There were no discernable connections between his victims which leads us to believe that his mind is filling in the gaps at random." Reid says, gesturing abstractly at nothing at all in particular.

"This disorder was likely triggered by a recent brain injury connected to the Great Lakes so keep a lookout for any recent accident victims. He was very social until the accident, and after it he immediately became anti-social. He was probably in a relationship recently, but then broke it off, he is not married, but possibly has children, which he will not shy away from using in a hostage situation." Morgan exclaims as he leans against a desk.

"His victims are all over the place, so we advise everyone to be on high alert. There is no pattern to the murders, from a 51-year-old single mother of two to a 14-year-old on vacation." You pause and take a breath, looking back down at your notes. "Someone out there knows this man, so we implore you to tell as many people as possible, our Media Liaison Jennifer Jareau will be setting up a press conference, and it is very important to get this out to as many people as possible."

"Won't that just spook him more?" One of the sheriff's deputy says, with a concerned look on his face.

"Yes, but at this point, he will kill again no matter what, it's better to have the public be informed because he will take another victim, whether we find him during or after is up to us."

He nods, and looks down at his notepad, badly masking his disturbed grimace.

"Thank you and let us know if you have any leads," Hotch exclaims, closing the meeting.

You walk up to Spencer "I bet we're their favorite people right about now." You say, sipping on your coffee.

Reid avoids your eyes and continues to fidget with the chess piece that he probably stole from one of the officer's desks. "What's wrong Reid?"

"I dunno, I just have a really bad feeling about this one," He picks up his cane and walks away. When Spencer has enough he needs to walk away, and as long as he wasn't hurt that was fine with you.

"Reid, y/l/n, Garcia's got something." Morgan raps his knuckles on the doorway and calls you into a conference room. "Hey babygirl, what do ya got for us?" He exclaims, shifting the call to speakerphone.

"A luscious blonde mane and an intense yearning to hold you." Emily giggles a little bit and Garcia can probably feel Hotch's glare "oh come on Derek."

"Sorry baby, keep goin'."

"I have a name. One Larry Todd. 3 weeks ago he was in a boat accident in which he had a severe concussion and was unconscious for 3 days. He immediately broke up with his girlfriend Shelby, which she was very angry about, adieu to her Facebook page. His ex-wife reported that he missed his last two visitations with his daughter Amelia." She takes a pause "he owned a bait shop that's been closed since his boat was destroyed in the accident, and it's listed as his last residency.

"Fits our profile to a tee," Emily exclaims.

"Thanks, Garcia," Hotch says, hanging up the phone call. "Emily, JJ is in the conference so run out and let her know. Morgan and Rossi, go to the bait shop with SWAT, and Reid and y/l/n go to the ex-wife's house; Emily and I will stay here and see what else we can dig up."

Everyone goes their separate ways. The sheriff takes the driver's seat, with you in the shotgun seat and Spencer in the back. You can hear the clang his leg makes against his cane and his foot bouncing.

"I'll take the daughter, and you can have the ex-wife."

"Okay," responds Spencer.

The ex-wife Miranda opens the door sobbing when you knock on it. "Excuse me, ma'am, my name is Agent y/n y/l/n and this is my partner Dr. Spencer Reid, do you mind if we ask you and your daughter a few questions about your ex-husband?"

She continues to sob but lets you in. You look back to see the sheriff playing video games on his phone and you scoff.

Spencer sits down with the crying woman and you politely ask if you can speak to her daughter. She tells you yes and that Amelia is around back.

"Bye, Reid." You blow a kiss to Spencer and walk out the door, shaking a sinister nagging feeling itching at the back of your neck.

You walk across the pavement and open the gate to enter your unsub's former backyard. "Hi Amelia, my name is y/n, I'm a friend of your mommies."

Beginning to grow more suspicious, you pull out your gun and triple-check to make sure it's on safety. If Todd is there you know that he would be fine with sacrificing his daughter for his own goals and you wouldn't let that happen "Amelia? Is your daddy here."

"Boo!" A little girl with pigtails holding a stuffed rabbit jumps from behind the recycling bin and you chuckle, putting your gun away in your holster. "Did I scare you?"

"You sure did!" You laugh. "Wow, that's such a pretty bunny, where did you get it?"

"My daddy got it for me." She said, showing off her gap tooth.

"That's so cool! Do you remember what it was like when he gave it to you?" You kneel to be at eye level with the child.

"Yeah, he was super cuddly, now he's a little more pokey, but that's okay." She says, playing with the bunny ears.

"When did he get pokey, Amelia?" You hesitated, something was off "I just want your daddy to be cuddly again."

"A little bit ago. He used to tell me stories till I fell asleep eeeeeverynight, but then he stopped for a week and when he came back he was like a big lion."

You had a growing sense of paranoia budding in your spine, why was she telling you all this so fast? "What type of stories?"

"He used to tell me princess stories, but after he stopped for a week he talked all about ones about the scary lady who tried to take me away, but then he stopped her! And the boy who was being dangerous so he had to make sure that she didn't hurt me." She exclaimed absentmindedly.

You start to pull your phone out of your pocket until Amelia starts talking again "and just now, he was talking about the bad knight who tried to take me away."

Your jaw dropped and you tried to find the best course of action, but by the time your brain started working it was too late. He walked up behind you and whispered into your ear "Nighty-night."

And then everything was black

~~~

"Hey, mommy."

"Yes, sweetheart?" She quickly wiped the tears off of her face to turn to her daughter.

"Can I have ice cream?"

"Of course sweetheart" she gives me a small smile and gets up towards the kitchen. "Where's that nice agent that came here with Dr. Reid?"

"They weren't a nice agent, they were a bad, bad, bad knight, and they were trying to take me away, so daddy took them instead."

No.

Oh no.

No no no no no no no no.

Where were they? Where was y/n?

I pulled out my gun without a second thought and left my cane behind, I ran as fast as I could without it, and by the time I was in the backyard my knee was burning and they were gone.

~~~

You woke up halfway through the drive. The road switched from smooth the bumpy a million times over, and it smelled like bees. Not like honey, not like pollen, like bees. Just bees. It smelled nice, but you don't want to die smelling bees.

You wanted to move. Move your body, move your head, move your eyes, move anything, but you couldn't move. Nothing could move. There was a sweaty tv shirt shoved between your teeth. Your hands were bound with bristled rope and there was metal all around you and you were certain that this was the back of a van. At first, you thought there must be a blindfold over your eyes, and then you realized that they were just too tired to open.

There was an old country song playing over the radio, a love song about a family in a house. The truck stopped shaking and he pulled the ignition. A growing sense of dread filled your stomach as he walked around towards the back of the truck. He opened the door and you saw his face.

That could only mean one thing- you weren't leaving here alive.

~~~

Within minutes crime scene techs were on the scene, but I knew they wouldn't find anything useful. The only thing that was there was the absence of y/n and our distraught profile.

"They were right here, right here, they were- they were right here, right here." Hotch looked at me somberly, and Morgan rubbed my shoulder with sympathy.

"We need to update our profile," Emily said, there was no time to waste, "we know what this guy does to people, and if he would risk abducting an armed federal agent in front of his daughter there's no doubt they in danger."

"We know Emily," Everyone looks at me kind of funny like I've said something wrong, but at this point, I don't care what anyone thinks of me, "His reason for doing this was for his daughter, he took out anyone he saw as a threat, a motherly figure, someone who could be her older brother, anyone who was a threat and wanted to take Amelia away from him.

"His disorder is fairly undocumented, being exactly the opposite of prosopagnosia, where patients disassociate faces from their loved ones, causes him to feel emotions about people he's never seen before, and his subconscious is assigning meaning to them at random, picking up anyone shows the slightest twinge of distaste.

"y/n picked up more than a twinge, they were there to take his daughter away, so he likely believes they're the mastermind." Everyone looks at me and waits for me to say the thing we all know is coming "he's not going to kill them before they suffer."

As we hitched a ride back to the station my leg was bouncing like crazy and my fingers were tapping the numbers of pi into the leather of the car door. Emily put her hand on my shoulder but I couldn't feel her, y/n missing was the only thing I could feel.

"Garcia I need you to check if Larry Todd owns any vehicles large enough to hold a person, trunks, vans, trucks anything," Morgan says into his speakerphone once we get back to the station.

"Oh god it's true, he really has them?" I can hear the distraught coated thick on her voice "do you think they're in pain, do you think he-"

"Garcia we don't have time for this, does he or does he not have any vehicles in his name." I snapped, I could apologize later when y/n was in a hospital bed.

"No, but you know I'm never one to go to bed early, and it turns out his great uncle died a year and a half ago, but his van was pulled over and given a speeding ticket a few months ago, how much do you wanna bet that's our guy and not a psychopath's uncle."

"Thanks, Garcia," Rossi hangs up the phone and turns to one of the sheriff's deputies in the room, "put out an ATB on that van."

"Okay, I'm gonna go through the medical files again, see if there's anything I missed," Hotch catches my arm.

"There isn't, right now all we can do is wait and look." He pauses "we've sent out patrol cars to look for the van, go out with Morgan, and circle around Lake Erie."

"Hotch, what if- what if we don't find them, or we find them and it's too late, or we find-"

"Right now she's alive, you said it yourself, he's not gonna let her die so easy."

As disturbing as it is hearing that someone you love more than anything is being tortured, I found it strangely comforting. They're alive. They are alive. They are prepared. After Tobias took me they brought me to a CIA torture seminar, just on the off chance that anything happened, I wouldn't break again.

I stared out the window of the passenger side of the SUV. Morgan wasn't talking, he knew what I was feeling, because he felt it before, when it happened to me.

"We've got a report of the vehicle going down sunmist lane" the scanner jumps to life.

I had memorized the map the second we landed; "we're five minutes away" and then, quietly under my breath, I whispered, "I'm coming y/n."

~~~

He held your head underwater for the 7th or the fiftieth time. You can't remember. You can't remember. You can't remember anything other than the water under the dock filling my lungs.

"What do you want with my daughter?!" He screamed at you as he pulled you out again, You vomited up all the water that my body could muster. You didn't know he had a daughter.

You forgot everything you learned to do. You forgot to pretend it was affecting me, You forgot how to hold my breath, You forgot. You forgot everything.

Except for Spencer, Spencer's smile, Spencer holding you, Spencer missing you until that was gone too.

Everything went away but the water.

He kicked you back off the dock again, and for a second you gasped for air, and then you sank, nothing even mattered anyways.

The man pulled you out again and kicked you in the ribs; you felt something rip inside of you and you screamed as loud as you could, which was more like a whimper.

"Larry Todd put your hands up!" Two men came behind the man who drowned you, you couldn't remember them, but you could remember the rip in your ribs filling with water.

He shoved you back into the water and you didn't even try to fight this time, you just sank, feet after feet after feet of water. You didn't hold your breath, you didn't care.

A figure appeared above you, and you saw the angel. He had a shimmering brown halo and a beautiful bright face that looked terrified, just like an angel.

And then he pulled you up.

~~~

This might be heaven, but it might be hell. You can tell the room is white without opening your eyes. There's a steady beeping sound to your left and it smells like chlorine.

When you finally manage to open your eyes you wished you hadn't. All you see is lethargy around you.

JJ is drooling in her sleep while Emily is asleep on her shoulder, Garcia is snoring in the corner with her knitting in a pile next to her. Morgan and Rossi are nowhere to be seen, but you can't blame them, seeing people they love getting beat up over and over again never gets easier. You can hear the faint sounds of Hotch arguing with someone over the phone in the hallway.

But worst of all is Spencer. He's wide awake and his foot is tapping like crazy on the ground. There are deep and dark eye bags surrounding his eyes and hints at a beard forming on his face. His cane is tossed uncharacteristically on the ground, and he pays it no attention whatever.

You open your mouth to speak, but when you do a stabbing pain shoots through your diaphragm and you gasp. The second Spencer hears you he shoots up and kneels next to the bed, which must be no easy feat.

"Hey, how are you?" He strokes your hair as gently as he can.

You try to speak but no words come out.

"Do you want some water?" You nod, trying to not feel pathetic. The second the glass of water comes into your eye line you knock it out of his hand and it goes shattering onto the floor, waking everyone else in the room up.

You start to cry, feeling guilty and scared about why a glass of water could've terrified you so much. "Hey, hey, it's okay, it's okay, it's just a bunch of sand made into something you can drink out of, it's not a big deal, don't worry." That calms you down a little bit.

You look around to see the rest of the team cradled around you. "How are you feeling honey?" Garcia whispers as if speaking too loudly would mortally wound you.

You reach up and touch your throat, and it burns. There's more confusion, and then JJ is getting her hand cut on the glass she was cleaning, Garcia was whispering too loudly and Emily was touching your arm, and Hotch and Morgan and Rossi were walking in the room and Spencer was pushing a button on your bed and the monitor was beeping and then you were screaming.

Screaming so loudly, screaming in pain, screaming in fear, screaming in confusion, screaming because you were overwhelmed and sad and scared. "Everyone gets out," Spencer says, and everyone quickly does, he knows you best, and right now, everything was too much.

"Wh-what happened" you whisper, throat and lungs still hurting but since you had screamed the worst part was over.

"The unsub kidnapped you, and tried to drown you, your heart stopped in the ambulance, but they brought you back." You remembered "You had been dunked in the water and brought back up at least 15 times, not including when I brought you out.

"You needed 53 stitches and had a punctured lung when we found you." He pauses "You're safe now, we have him in custody and he can never hurt anyone ever again." You let out a breath that you didn't know you had been holding.

"I'm so sorry," You were crying "I forgot you, I'm so sorry. He made everything go away but the water I'm sorry that I forgot you."

"It's okay, it's okay, you didn't do anything wrong, you were trying to stay alive." He stroked your hair and held your hands gently "He tortured you, when Hankel tortured me all I could think about were the drugs and the pain, you didn't do anything wrong, you survived."

"I survived?"

"Yes."

"Can I tell you something?" You chuckled, your tears had stopped but it was still wet on your face.

"Anything."

"I thought you were an angel when you saved, and now I realize that you weren't my angel, it wasn't magic, and it wasn't godly." Spencer looks puzzled, and you paused to take a deep and painful breath "It was the fact that I am so deeply in love with you, that seeing you love me back felt like heaven.

Spencer stares at you, his mouth closed and his mouth on the floor "You don't have to say anything, just know that-"

His lips are on yours before you can finish your sentence. For a moment you forget about the pain in your throat, the burn in your lungs, and the agony all over your body; it was just Spencer.

You pulled away for breath, your breaths dancing with each other.

"I was so scared" he whimpered in fear.

You stroked his hair gently "I was more terrified than I had ever been. I was so horrified that I would wake up tomorrow and my reason for living would be dead. I was more scared than I had been when I thought my dad killed a kid, I was more scared than when Hankel tortured me, I was more scared when I realized that I loved drugs more than my own life.

"You were the person that held my hand when I was hurting so bad I would forget to breathe, and then you weren't here because you were the person in pain and I realized that I loved you because nothing hurt me more than the fear that I could lose the one thing in the world that made me feel okay."

He takes a deep breath and looks at you as deeply in your eyes as you thought could ever be possible. "I love you too, and I promise you I'll never let you go."

His lips meet yours, and through a kiss, you whisper "I'll never forget you again"

And you knew that you had Spencer and everything is going to be okay.

~~

My Masterlist

Requests are open!

~Taglists are open~

Permanent Tags: @natasha-danvers​

Marvel:

Criminal Minds:

[boldlyvoid]

Hypothetically | Chapter 21-24

Summary: Reader and Spencer were friends in kindergarten, she watched him grow up and explore the world while she was still trying to catch up to him. now that they work together, they fall in love incredibly fast. friends to lovers, case of the week style story.

Warnings 18+: Murderers, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Blood, Guns, mentions of autopsy, Fluff, Falling In Love, Friends to Lovers, bed-sharing, Riding, Unprotected Sex, Virgin Reader, Case of the Week, original crimes, Food mention, Smut, Oral Sex, Light BDSM, Pregnancy, Pregnancy Talk, obgyn appointments and info, Home Invasion, Past Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Emotional Manipulation, Grooming, Pedophilia mention, non-con oral (male receiving), Pregnant Sex, Daddy Kink, Breeding Kink, Homophobia, conversion therapy

A/N; thee case in c21 is personal to me, like fictional revenge.

word count so far: 70K (chapter 1-25)

chapter 21

Having Spencer all to herself for 3 weeks straight was an experience she’ll never forget. They had the whole month of January off together, painting and re-decorating their home till it was exactly how they wanted it. It felt like home, it was theirs for real now.

Painting the bedroom green was the best idea she’s ever had. When the sun finally woke them up every morning, it wasn’t as blinding. It was paradise. The golden beams of light cast a beautiful glow around the room, it was like she was in a magic forest at the start of every day.

Spencer was laying on his back, his hair scattered on the pillow. He looked so peaceful, sleeping with his mouth wide open. Y/N was leaning on her elbow, looking down at the beautiful man she had the pleasure of spending the rest of her life with.

She brushed the hair off his face, watching his nose scrunch up as he felt her fingertips on his cheek. The sun on his face made him glow, he looked like a gift from god laying before her.

“Good morning baby,” she whispered softly. Dragging her finger along his jaw and down his neck, “we get to go to work today.”

Spencer stretched as he woke up, slipping an arm under her and pulling her into his chest. She held on tight, kissing his neck as she settled in. “Morning,” he replied. Raspy as ever.

“Wanna go get breakfast?” She asked softly.

He laughed against her skin, “gotta feed the baby.”

“And the wiiiife,” she teased.

“Not for another 11 weeks and 2 days,” he corrected her. “But yes, we should go get breakfast,” he whispered after a moment.

“Come on get up,” she replied with a big smile. He patted her ass as she peeled out of his grasp. Sitting up and stretching, taking a look down at the basketball protruding from her stomach. “Damn.”

“What?” Spencer asked.

She stood up beside the bed and pulled her shirt up, showing Spencer how big her stomach was. Turning sideways so he really got a good look at it. Spencer leaned over and kissed her right on her belly button that was beginning to pop.

“I know your ears are on in there, I love you, Matthew,” Spencer whispered against her skin.

She couldn’t stop smiling, taking a moment to rub her hands over the bump in amazement. “Hi Mr. Matty MaGoo, mommy also loves you.”

“Mr. Matty MaGoo?” Spencer laughed, looking at her with the biggest smile.

“Yes,” She laughed. “It just came to me, and it's going to stick.”

“Derek’s been calling him Mini G,” Spencer added.

“We should tell him it's Matthew, then he can be little Matty G,” Y/N swooned. “Seriously let’s go I miss everyone.”

“Okay, okay go get ready then,” he insisted, getting out of bed and dragging her to the bathroom.

—

Spencer drove, giving her a chance to look over her work emails before the day started. She was still CC’d on a bunch of VICAP things, being able to snoop on what was coming in and inspecting it.

Sometimes Mindy would CC her in just for an opinion.

Subject: Found Something. From; Mindy Patel To; SSA Y/N Y/L/N, Unit Chief SSA Aaron Hotchner, SSA-CL Jennifer Jareau

There’s been a child abduction in Arizona, I’ve pieced together some thing’s I’ve been working on in the background that might help the case if you are called in to assist. Even if you are not I believe you should take a look at this.

Mindy Patel, VICAP.

Attachment

Year: 1998 Victim 1: Emily Lawrence - 13. Kept till 16. Taken: August 3rd, 1998. Williams, AZ Found: June 10th, 2001. Camp Verde, AZ ME: decay has he placed at 48 hours postmortem when she was found - strangled, sexually assaulted long term, extensive throat damage. Never been pregnant. - COD: asphyxiation Info: good student, innocent shy girl. Followed the rules. Taken when walking home from school. Held for 3 years, assaulted and chained. Dumped without care.

Year: 2001 Victim 2: Olivia Tomms - 13. Kept till 16 Taken: August 3rd, 2001. Payson, AZ Found: June 23rd, 2004. Florence, AZ ME: decay has her at about 2 weeks postmortem. - strangled, sexually assaulted long term, extensive throat damage. Never been pregnant. - COD: asphyxiation Info: good student, innocent shy girl. Followed the rules. Taken when walking home from school. Held for 3 years, assaulted and chained. Dumped without care.

Year: 2004 Victim 3: Shelby Summers - 13. Kept till 16. Taken: August 3rd, 2004. Peach Springs, AZ Found: July 16th, 2007. Keams, AZ ME: decay has her at over a month postmortem. - strangled, sexually assaulted long term, extensive throat damage. Never been pregnant. - COD: asphyxiation Info: good student, innocent shy girl. Followed the rules. Taken when walking home from school. Held for 3 years, assaulted and chained. Dumped without care.

Year: 2007 Victim 4: Beth Green - 11. Kept till 13 Taken: August 3rd, 2007. Saint John, AZ Found: January 13th, 2010. @ flagstaff hospital. ME: COD complications from a miscarriage. Massive blood loss. - well taken care of. Throat damage. Signs of being detained long term. Info:good student, innocent shy girl. Followed the rules. Taken when walking home from school. Held for 3 years, assaulted and chained. Dumped with remorse like he didn’t want her to die, and he felt sorry because he loved her.

Newest abduction: Name: Sally Irvine - 12 Taken: February 3rd, 3pm. Middle School pick-up (missing 13 hours now) Witness Report: Italian/greek man. Early 30’s. Claimed to be her parents assistant. Sally was used to going home with random people from her parents' work. Handsome man, very charming and convincing. He wore a suit and drove a Silver Honda Civic. Rust at the back, partial plate HC8.

“Fuck,” Y/N cried silently as she scrolled through all the information, even in a compact form.

“What’s wrong?” Spencer asked, looking over at her with concern.

“Um,” she didn’t really know why she was reacting like this at first. Then it hit her. “Mindy sent me a case and it’s hitting a little too close to home.”

“Would you like to explain it yet? It’s okay if you want to process it alone,” Spencer comforted her easily like it was his second nature.

She let out a deep breath. “There’s a serial killer in Arizona that is kidnapping girls between 11 and 13, only keeping them 3 years. Every ME report says they have extensive internal throat damage, and 3 of the 4 found were never pregnant. This unsub is forcing them into oral for 3 years straight.”

“Fuck,” Spencer agreed. “I think we should take this one, if you can’t I would fully understand.”

“I think the unsub is my rapist.”

Spencer pulled over onto the side of the road. Putting the car in park and flashing the 4-ways. He turned to her softly and looked at her with a blank face.

“Walk me through it.”

“What?”

“If I’m going to go in there with you and tell Hotch that this is the same guy who hurt you, then you’re going to need to explain it to him and the team,” Spencer explained softly. “You’ve never even told me the full story, I don’t know anything about that summer other than the fact something happened. The first time you repeat this in front of me is going to be hard, and I don’t want you to have to do that in front of all of them.”

She couldn’t help herself from letting out a small sob, “okay.”

She took a few minutes to collect her thoughts, and calm down enough to get full words out of her mouth.

“When I was 12,” she started. “My mom went back to work, and she didn’t trust me to watch my brothers because they were rowdy and never listened to me. Like you said, they were more like my older brothers.

“My dad’s best friend, Jimmy, his wife had MS so she was home all the time. They had 3 older children and a few foster boys, she was used to lots of kids being there. And she had a pool to keep us occupied,” she bit her lip before she explained anymore.

“My mom’s birthday is June 8th. That’s when victim 1 was murdered,” was the first fact she explained that related to the case. She handed Spencer her phone so he could read and follow along.

“My dad is a Mason with the Masonic Lodge in Los Vegas, and he was becoming the master of his division on my mom's birthday that year, so we rented a hall and had a big party. Jimmy’s foster son was there, you remember Christopher Torsey? He was a freshman and I was in grade 6, about to enter grade 7, that was when the grooming started. He took me into the back room and asked if anyone had ever kissed me, I said no. He leaned in and kissed me in the dark and I was a giggly mess.

“My parents and his were really friends and he would come over all the time, our dads would drink in the backyard with our mothers till 1 in the morning most weekends. So I spent long periods of time with this boy for a few years, trusting him like a friend before he started anything. That summer he would always find a way to wander off with me, at first it was just kissing in different places where we could be alone together. Then he would touch my boobs, and he had me take my shirt off a few times.”

Spencer looked calm, but the redness in his face and the pulse in his neck told a different story. Her breathing got heavier as she had to recall it all, and she didn’t want him to be so upset.

“We worked at a local church camp together that July, we’d do crafts and sing songs and after all the kids left and we had to clean up, he’d find a way to take me to the room where they held the nativity scene out of season. He’d start kissing and touching me like normal, and then Kendra walked in once and saw and suddenly he went from obsessed with me, to disgusted, saying I came on to him and that it was all me. He was disgusted by me when we were in public, but he loved me apparently behind closed doors.”

“On August 3rd,” a tear slipped down her cheek. “The day the girls go missing. That was the first time he took me back to the shed and said ‘when two people are in love, they do things, and I love you. So you have to,’ He took his, you know, and I’d never seen one before. It was scary and I didn’t want to, I wanted to leave, but he pushed me against the wall and down to my knees.” She had to stop to take a breath, Spencer was crying silently as he watched her explain it all.

“He kept me trapped there while he did it,” she explained. “The worst part is that his parents were hosting a wedding that night, so no one could hear me basically screaming no over the music. He knew that. And so, when I complained about the sore throat the next day, my parents thought it was from all the singing.”

Spencer let out a shaky breath, he looked at her with so much love and sadness, she knew he loved her. She reached across the centre console and wiped the tears off his face, pecking his lips softly before sitting back to continue.

“The dates match up, he was Italian, they’re all 11-13 with throat damage,” she ran it down. “It’s him.”

Spencer licked his lips, wiping the tears off his face before taking a deep breath. “Okay, let’s go tell Hotch.”

Aaron stood up from his desk after Y/N explained the situation, walking up close to her with a sad smile on his face, “this was a very hard thing to come forward with. How would you like to participate in the investigation?” He was soft with her for the first time, it was surreal.

“Um, I’d like to come with you to Arizona,” she said softly. “when Garcia finds him, I’d like to be the one to interview him.”

“Do you think that is a wise idea?” He asked softly.

“When I was 16, years after everything happened. I went to Jimmy’s house for an event, and Christopher was there, and I went to his room. I was so desperate for the bullying to stop. For the lies, he had told about me to go away, that I went in there and apologized to him,” her voice almost disappeared as she got to the end of the sentence. Crying in disbelief. “2 years later he started abducting. I apologized to my rapist and he started kidnapping girls. I need to look him in the eyes and find out why he did it.”

“Okay, let’s tell the team.”

Y/N and Garcia spent an hour building the case files and compiling all the data they had on Christopher Torsey. Joining the team in the briefing room, where Spencer had already relayed the events to the team. Y/N didn’t need to describe it all 3 times in 2 hours.

She passed all the folders out, trying to avoid the looks the team gave her. They were sorry, they respected her, they wanted revenge for her. She knew it all came from a place of love, however, she hated being perceived by others.

It was a trauma thing. For so long people had the wrong idea about her, she was bullied and put down, and hated for no reason. She hates any form of attention, the glances and staring, the whispers of rumours being told as fact. It was stressful.

“Before we start,” she started softly. “Thank you in advance for your concerns, but I’ve been in therapy for 10 years. I’m very happy, this is gonna fuckin’ suck, but at the end of the day I’m coming home to a man who loves me, a baby on the way, and the best friends I can ask for. He’s going to prison. I win.”

Derek smiled at her, “that’s my girl. What did you find?”

“Christopher Torsey was born in November of 1979. His father was extremely abusive, he was in the ER a lot by the time he was 11. His mother killed herself in front of him when he was 12, he also watched his father rape his mother according to his child therapist,” Garcia started. Not knowing how to say the next part without Y/N crying.

“He uh, he said that his dad would tell his mom to be quiet. That-uh, I’m sorry, shouldn’t you say this?”

Y/N stepped in without a second thought. “He said that his father would hold the fact that he loved her over her head to force her into having sex with him. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.”

“He’s our guy for sure. Do we have an address?” Prentiss asked.

“Yeah, he lives in a double-wide trailer in Cottonwood. Near the back with his own access to the main road,” Y/N explained. “I knew he moved to Arizona when Jimmy finally kicked him out. I haven’t heard from him in years.”

“Y/N is coming with us, wheels up in 20.”

—

Cottonwood PD waited for them to arrive before apprehending him. They were concerned that he would run, with his access to the woods and a four-wheeler in his possession, it was a matter of boxing him in quietly with a backup plan in place and men on the ground.

“Can I suggest something?” Y/N cut into the Police Chief and Hotch’s conversation.

“Sure.”

“Um, what if I walk up in our civilian clothes, and just pretend that we’re there to rub it in his face that I'm happy and in love,” Y/N suggested. “I can wear a wire, you can be in a surveillance van listening in. You’ll be right there if we see Sally or sense something’s up.”

“Are you sure you can do that?” Hotch asked her.

“I am,” she turned to Spencer, “if you can control your temper you can come. If not, I’ll show up with Derek and still rub it in his face that someone loves me now.”

Spencer sighed deeply as he contemplated it. “I’ll kill him,” he admitted. “Take Derek.”

“Let’s get suited up,” Derek patted Spencer’s shoulder. “I won’t let him hurt her again. Don’t worry.”

“I know.” Spencer looked disappointed.

Everyone left the room, leaving Spencer and Y/N alone. She wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug resting her face against his chest. He softly held her in return, rubbing his hands along her back with his cheek on her head.

“I love you, forever and always,” She reminded him. “And I know how much you love me, believe me. I wouldn’t have been able to do this if I didn’t truly believe Chris was wrong.”

She pulled back when she felt a tear on her head. She wiped it softly with her thumb as he leaned his cheek into her palm. “I am loveable, and you love me. I win.”

He laughed softly, “I won too.”

She pulled him into a soft kiss, “I’ll be back in your arms soon.”

“I’ll be in the van watching the whole time, I love you so much,” he added for good measure.

She smiled as she walked away, throwing a fist in the air like the end of the breakfast club. Knowing full well he’d never get the reference. JJ on the other hand, laughed as she followed with Spencer.

They changed into regular clothes, getting in a car from the impound lot and following the surveillance van. Morgan was quiet, Y/N knew he wanted to talk to her, to go over the plan, but he didn’t know how to. The wire wouldn’t be on till they walked out, giving Y/N and Derek their privacy if he ever chose to speak.

“Did you ever confront your guy?” Y/N asked.

He nodded, “Carl Buford. I got to show him who I am now, that I put men like him behind bars. That I’ll always win.”

“Is it a good feeling?”

Derek set his hand palm up on the centre console, looking at her softly as if to ask her to take it. She interlocked their fingers, he rubbed his thumb against her skin.

“You’re right, it fucking sucks. The original pain never goes away, but there is a content feeling knowing he won’t get to hurt another person, that he might get his ass kicked in prison,” he smiled that beautiful Derek smile. “I’ll always be here for when you need someone who gets it.”

“Thank you,” she smiled.

They pulled into the trailer park slowly, separating from the team as they approached Christopher’s trailer. “Just pretend you’re Spencer, treat me the way he would. I know Spencer tells you everything, go off of memory of what he’s said about me.”

“You know he tells me everything?” Derek asked softly, laughing a little to himself.

“Because he also tells me everything,” she smirked. “When he’s tired and he rambles, he tells me about his whole day and that includes when he asks you for advice.”

“You two are gross,” he smiled. “I hope I can replicate it.”

“Come on,” she laughed, getting out of the car and waiting for Derek at the hood.

She took his hand before walking up to the door, a hand on her belly to make it look bigger. Really wanting to show off that she was in a better place than he was.

She knocked, 3 times, stepping back so he could open the door. She didn’t feel scared, she felt anxious in excitement to watch Derek take him to the floor.

“Y/N?” She heard his voice for the first time in 13 years. “What are you doing here?”

“My therapist suggested that I come here and show you someone actually did end up loving me, regardless of what you said,” she explained.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he panicked, flashing his eyes back and forth between her and Derek.

“I can come in and explain it for you if you’d like?” Y/N smiled. “You’ve got nothing to hide I assume? I’m just wildly obsessed with you and a liar right? That’s what you told everyone so I wouldn’t be able to say you forced my head on your dick with the promise that you loved me.”

“I- I uh,” he stuttered. Starting to shake lightly.

“That’s what you do to all the girls, isn’t it, Chris?” Derek cut in, pulling the screen door open and watching as Christopher ran to the back of the house. “We got a runner!!” He announced to the wire.

Y/N didn’t run after him, she knew the team had him. She walked through the house to watch from the back door. Only to find Spencer stiff-arming him.

Christopher flipped over Spencer’s arm, hitting the ground before Spencer was on top of him. Spencer punched him in the face, once, twice, three times before he stopped. Sitting over the unconscious man as he caught his breath. Everyone just watched him. He rolled Christopher over, cuffed him and walked away into the woods.

Y/N carefully jogged into the yard, passing the bleeding and groaning asshole she used to know as she ran after Spencer. He was walking too fast, and he didn’t look like he was going to stop.

“Spencer Walter Reid!” She yelled at him as if she was his mother. “Stop.”

He stopped abruptly, huffing as he did so. He only turned around to face her when she finally caught up to him. “Don’t touch me yet,” he instructed her.

“Okay,” she stopped a foot in front of him. “Look at me, breathe. In and out.” She used her hands as she motioned a breath in, and a release out. She repeated it 4 times, watching him do the same.

“Can I hug you now?” She asked softly.

He nodded, stepping into her space and wrapping himself around her. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

“It was actually really appreciated,” she laughed. “I was debating if having a baby at 22 weeks was worth punching him in the face a few times.”

Spencer laughed softly into her shoulder. Squeezing her in his grasp as he breathed her in. “I love you.”

“I love you, more,” she smiled against his neck before pressing a soft kiss to his ever-beating pulse. “Let’s go see the team, come on.”

Y/N was adamant about searching the trailer with the team. Going to the surveillance van for a vest and gloves while Christopher was taken to the police station, and Spencer had his hand wrapped up.

It still smelled like him in there. The smell of his detergent mixed with smoke from the fireplace. It never changed. She noticed his PlayStation was on, he was still interested in games. He still slept with the brown comforter that was on his bed when she was 12. It was worn down, holes gathered at the bottom as it was almost see-through now.

She opened the closet to see a very large metal safe in its place. She took a deep breath, looking at the keypad to see what numbers had been worn down the most, guessing his password.

0803

It popped open, it made her feel sick to her stomach. As she opened it, she heard the muffled screams behind duck tape. Sally Irvine was tied up, hunched over in a tiny metal box while he played GTA.

She wanted to kill him.

“Hey, hey it’s okay,” she shushed the girl. “Sally, my name is Y/N. We’re here to take you home, you're safe now.”

Y/N took the tape off Sally’s mouth softly, the girl sobbed immediately. Not able to say a single thing as Y/N untied her and held Sally in her arms. Sally hugged her back as tight as she could, sobbing into her shirt as Y/N rocked her back and forth. Crying along with her.

“He did it to me when I was 12 too,” Y/N whispered.

Sally pulled back and looked at her with puffy eyes, “really?” She asked. Her voice low and scratchy.

“JJ can you get some water?” She called behind her. “Yes. I was his first.”

“Y/N,” the girl repeated. “That’s what he called me?”

She couldn’t stop the sick feeling in her gut, “let’s get you out of here.” She changed the topic, helping the little girl to her feet and to an ambulance.

Y/N smiled at her as she dropped her off with the EMTs, walking off into the woods as quickly as she could. She leaned over, holding her own hair back as she threw up on the ground.

She swatted away at the hand rubbing her back suddenly, continuing to hurl in the bushes as she heard them behind her, shushing her. She wiped her hand on her mouth before she calmed herself down.

She sighed and turned around to see Morgan. His arms were open for her to hug him, she buried her face in his chest as she cried. Not able to fully process all the information she just heard.

“Let’s get you home,” Derek whispered. Escorting her back to the car, she was done for the day.

chapter 22

Valentine’s day had come and gone by the time they finished their most recent case. Landing in Quantico very late on the 16th of February. Everyone departed the plane slowly, half asleep after the 3-hour flight.

“Did you guys miss any plans?” Y/N asked JJ and Emily as they walked together.

“Yeah,” Emily sighed, “I uh, I’ve been seeing someone.”

“Since when?” JJ asked, both her and Y/N suddenly not tired at all. They stopped on the tarmac and stared at her.

“Um, a few months now,” She blushed.

“Was this the sin to win weekend?” Y/N asked softly.

Emily nodded, “what’s sin to win?” JJ asked just as quietly.

“It’s a weekend for gay people in Atlantic City,” Emily replied. “It’s an easy way to mingle in a safe space.”

“Oh,” JJ was shocked. “Oh, so you’re, and you too?” She pointed at both of them as the information was processed.

Y/N and Emily smiled at her and laughed. “Bi? Yes,” Y/N replied.

“I’m still not sure,” Emily added. She sighed deeply, shaking her head as she tried to speak again. “I’ve never really enjoyed male company? It feels more like a performance than a relationship.”

“I mean good for you for noticing that now, if it wasn’t for Spencer I’d be in the same boat,” Y/N smirked at her. “He’s more than just a pretty face.”

“Wow,” JJ was shocked. “I would’ve never known.”

Emily placed her hand on JJ’s back, leading her towards the charter back to headquarters, “oh you poor, poor, heterosexual woman.”

“She has a cat, she cuts her bangs when she’s stressed and she bites her fingernails,” Y/N explained to JJ as they picked their seats. “She likes pussy, JJ.”

Emily smacked her arm lightly, all of them laughing hysterically. The boys walked onto the bus to their cackling, desperately wanting to know what was so funny.

“I was just telling them, I met someone and I’d like for you to all meet her soon,” Emily explained to the rest of the team. “I think you’ll really like her.”

“No way,” Derek smiled, high-fiving her. “Congrats dude, welcome to the dark side.”

“You too?” JJ was shocked. “Okay, put your hand up if you’re a straight person,” she stretched her arm into the air. Hotch and Rossi joined her.

“Really?” Spencer and Y/N looked at each other with excitement.

“What the fuck?” JJ was dumbfounded. “How did I not know this?”

“It just never came up before,” Derek shrugged. “Tell us more about this girlfriend of yours, Prentiss.”

“Or,” Y/N cut in. “you could bring her to Vegas in April.”

“Why?” Emily smirked at her.

“If you’re all free on April 23rd,” She teased them along. “Spencer and I would like you to come to our wedding at my parent’s house.”

“Oh!” JJ and Emily freaked, “holy shit!”

“So, you guys are in?” She laughed.

“Yeah!”

For 2 in the morning, the bus was the most excited they had ever been. And Penelope didn’t even join them on this trip. Normally it was her making this kind of excitement, Y/N basked in the happiness that filled the bus.

They discussed little details on the way to their cars, standing in the garage for a good 15 minutes as they planned the dates they’d need to arrange to have off. Hotch knew he could pull some strings to use everyone’s vacation time for a few days.

They exchanged hugs before breaking apart for the night. Planning to return around noon that same day. Giving them a sweet 9 hours of peace and quiet.

“We still need to invite Penelope,” Spencer whispered when they were halfway home. Interrupting the silence that Y/N was enjoying.

Y/N laughed softly, watching him drive with a smile on his face. “I only told the rest of them because Penelope somehow hacked into my calendar app, to plan a baby shower around my schedule, and saw the plans.”

“Of course,” he nodded along.

“So yeah,” she smiled. “She’s told me that she wants to throw me a baby shower/bachelorette party now.”

“That would be nice,” Spencer agreed, squeezing her thigh where his hand was always glued to her.

“If we even get more time off before the wedding, I’m crossing every appendage on my body in the hopes all the psychos take the day off!” She laughed, twisting her arms and legs in a demonstration.

He laughed, leaning against the wheel as he tried to keep his focus on the road. “I love you.”

“You better!” She teased him.

It went quiet again. She could hear the tires on the sandy slush. The grinding of pressure as the snow compressed into the tire tread. Small rocks being flicked up from the wheels, smacking the underbelly of the car as they approached their house.

She sighed as she saw the place, the beautiful green door illuminated by the porch light. Screaming ‘welcome home!’ As they pulled into the parking spot.

Sleep surprisingly came easier to her the more pregnant she got. She was used to laying on her left side now, she actually preferred it, because it means that every morning when she woke up, the sun came in just perfectly to make Spencer glow.

The alarm on Spencer’s table started to beep letting them know it was 10:30. She softly watched him roll over and smacked the machine before turning back to her and closing his eyes once more.

“No.”

She huffed in a silent laugh, getting closer to kiss the tip of his nose. “Time to wake up,” she whispered between kisses spread across his face.

He was trying his best not to smile as she peppered his skin with kisses. Pushing him onto his back so she had more skin to cover. It had been a while since they did anything together.

Between the cases and the baby, and everything Spencer learned about her past trauma. He’s been a little distant, and it was starting to make her worry. Dr. Korrapati promised that this sudden burst of anxiety was normal at this stage of pregnancy. It was what contributed the most to the nesting phase, but it still scared her.

She wanted to kiss him, to run her hand down his chest and palm over his boxers until she couldn’t take it anymore. So she did, just a little more seductively.

She moaned softly as she kissed the patch of skin under his ear and down his neck softly. She dragged her fingers over his skin, looping around his nipple as she sucked on his neck. She lifted her leg lightly over his, trying to get some friction between her legs as she kissed him.

“We should probably just go to work,” Spencer softly interjected.

She sighed, dropping her forehead against his shoulder and letting her shoulders slouch.

“I’m not broken!” She sat straight up as she yelled at him. “Can I please just fuck my boyfriend? I have been horny for Weeks,” she wasn’t sure where the sudden burst of emotion came from.

“Oh,” he sat up too, resting his hand on her back softly. “I didn’t realize you wanted to after everything, and the baby? You’ve had a rough few months.”

She laughed lightly, “Spence, of course I do?”

She looked at him softly, cupping his jaw in her hand. “I’ve had to process my trauma before. Yes, it’s still bothering me, and yes I have new trauma that I need to address with my therapist. But,” she emphasized. “I am a woman with needs, and one of those needs is getting railed before work by Doctor Reid.”

“You’re one hundred percent sure?” Spencer asked again.

She smiled and nodded, pushing him back down against the pillows. She resumed her last position, putting her leg between his so they could grind lightly and make out. “If it gets to be too much, I’ll ask you to stop.”

“Okay,” Spencer looked up at her, brushing her hair behind her ear as she hovered over him. “I love you.”

“Prove it,” she teased him, leaning in and kissing his neck again.

He reached behind her to grab her ass, she had noticed his hands gravitating there more as she gained pregnancy weight. She wasn’t complaining either, the way his hands felt on her skin was glorious.

He was putty in her hands, tilting his head to the side so she could kiss, lick and suck wherever she so pleased. She reached her free hand into his hair while he other kept her steady, in the perfect spot to grind against his boney hip.

He was all gasps and heavy breaths underneath her, she raised her leg lightly dragging it over his hardening erection before putting herself back in place. Just wanting to see how far along he was.

She rolled onto her back then, laying flat, waiting for him. He pushed his underwear to his ankles as he flipped on top of her. She was nothing but giggles as Her Spencer came out to play.

Opening her legs, she greeted him back into her grasp as he hovered over her. Both hands planted against the pillow as he looked down at her. His hair falling into his eyes, she pushed his hair back behind his ears.

“You might need a haircut soon,” she teased him, biting her lip softly.

“Shhh,” he whispered.

She took his right hand from beside her head, gripping him by the wrist and guiding him towards her mouth. Taking his middle and ring finger in, sucking on the digits softly. Making him release a sound she’s never heard before.

She looped her tongue around his fingers, spreading them lightly as she licked a stripe through them. Feeling his skin against her teeth, which only seemed to excite him more.

She pulled off with a pop, he looked mesmerized by the trail of spit that connected her bottom lip to his wet fingers. “Fuck,” he gasped as his breathing hitched.

“You know where to put them,” she whispered up at him, staring into his eyes as she bit her lip.

He kissed her quickly, pulling her forward so he could get the t-shirt she was still wearing off her body, throwing it off the bed as he kissed her neck, sucking a mark into the skin as he pushed his hand into her panties.

“Jesus,” he whispered against her neck as he felt how wet she was. “You weren’t kidding.”

Making her twitch slightly as he used the two fingers that were just in her mouth, to drag up and down on her clit. Rubbing it back and forth between the two knuckles.

“Fuck,” she breathed out as she gripped his hair. Palming his scalp while he kept kissing her neck.

She could feel him grinding against the bed as he kissed her, moaning against the space under her ear as he quickened his finger movements.

“I need you to fuck me, like yesterday,” she panted against his mouth, licking his bottom lip after.

He pulled away from her then, lifting her hips to drag her panties down. Keeping them on one of her ankles as he gripped the base of his cock and sat on his knees.

The sight between her legs was phenomenal. The glow of the sun on the lake through the windows as Spencer stroked himself in front of her.

Suddenly, he took both of her knees in his hands. Pushing them to her chest slightly before flipping her over. Extending her hips as he held her ass up. Kissing each cheek softly before straightening his posture.

“Ready?” He asked, she wasn’t expecting it.

Her face pressed into the pillow as she tried to find the best position to support herself. Pushing her hips back in a silent yes. He understood her body language, lining himself up with her and slowly pushing in.

She pushed back against him as well, moaning as she took all of him. “Finally,” she sighed, wiggling against his hips.

He gripped her hips, pushing her off abruptly before slamming back in. She was shocked, letting out a gasped moan as he fucked into her. Taking the instructions too literally, railing her.

She had never been that loud before in her life. Concerned Rossi would be able to hear them from across the lake, but it didn’t stop her. Only enticing him to keep it up.

She pressed her face into the pillow more as she attempted to reach her clit. She couldn’t, “fuck, Spence?”

“Yeah?” He slowed.

She took his hand off her hip, “can’t reach.” Her breath was erratic as she tried to explain.

“Aw poor bunny,” he teased her, slowing to a grind as his fingers ghosted over her clit. “Can’t get yourself off anymore?”

“Please daddy?” She let it slip, feeling his cock twitch inside of her as she did.

He leaned forward, kissing her shoulder softly. “Tell daddy what you want, use your big girl words.”

She pushed back against him, raising herself from the pillow to look over her shoulder at him. “I was going to say breed me, daddy.” She teased, watching his entire personality change. “But it looks like you already did.”

He licked his lips, pushing his hair out of his face as he shook his head at her. “You’re going to regret that.”

She pressed her face back into the pillow and perched her ass back more, ever the invitation. He ran his hand softly over her asscheek, slapping it before he started to fuck her again, reaching around to rub her clit, like she asked, ever so nicely.

They found their rhythm then, pushing against each other in just the right way. Between her deep breathing and the moans she released, the only other thing she could only hear was the sound of their skin slapping together as Spencer fucked her harder than ever before.

“Fuck, sweet Jesus I love your cock,” she praised him, punching into the pillow as she pushed herself back into him, on all 4’s now.

Using his free hand, he spread his fingers through her hair. Gripping her at the roots and pulling her head back as he slammed into her.

“Yes, daddy,” Y/N panted as she felt herself get closer to the edge. “Right there.”

“Cum for me bunny,” he instructed her, “let me fill your perfect little cunt.”

She came with a shout, pushing back against him as his words pushed her over the edge. Not being able to ever say no to that man, feeling his hips shake as he tried to fuck her through his own orgasm.

He pulled out, flipping her limp body back over so she could lay on her back, releasing the pressure on her stomach. Legs still spread as he observed his handiwork, scooping it up with his fingers and pushing it back inside of her. Making her clench up at the feeling.

“Spence-“

“Too much?” He smirked down at her.

She nodded, catching her breath as he just sat there. Still, on his knees, cock now soft and resting against his leg. She preached herself up on her forearms, shaking her head at him as she bit her lip.

“Where the fuck did that come from?” She asked him.

“I have no idea,” he laughed. “But hypothetically,” he bit his lip and raised his eyebrow. “I wouldn’t mind revisiting that on a later date.”

She laughed, dropping back against the sheets. “Me either.”

—

She waddled from the car to the elevator. A mixture of pregnancy and over-extending her hips, exercising with Spencer. Lamaze class more specifically, if anyone asked.

“I should really start calling you ducky,” Spencer whispered in the elevator.

“I hate you,” she bit her lip to stop herself from laughing.

“Really?” He teased her, “because if I recall 27 minutes and 15 seconds ago when you were saying ‘fuck, sweet Jesus, I love your cock,’” he whispered into her ear.

The elevator doors opened as her jaw dropped, “notice how I specified which part, Doctor Reid?” She answered abruptly, walking out towards her coworkers.

“So that’s how it’s going to be?” He said as he followed her. Making everyone turn around to see them.

“What’s going on?” Morgan noticed it first.

“Nothing,” Y/N rolled her eyes. “Just correcting the genius.”

“On?” Prentiss pried.

“Well this morning she said and I quote-“

“I will cut your balls off and hang them from the mirror in my car,” she snapped, glaring at him as she pointed her finger in his direction.

“Mama’s got claws,” Morgan laughed at them. “Damn.”

Spencer wrapped his arms around her, kissing her cheek in front of everyone. She turned pink, pretending to be pissed while a smile crept onto her face.

“She loves me,” Spencer smiled, pressing their cheeks together.

“One part, it’s nice to me and doesn’t talk back,” she replied, making everyone laugh as Spencer shook his head.

“Okay, you win,” he put his hands up in surrender as he backed away. Opening the door to the bullpen and disappearing behind his desk.

chapter 23

St. Patrick’s Day was never a holiday that Y/N or Spencer really cared for. Yes, they wore green to work, but other than that they didn’t really see the hype. They were Halloween people.

Will and JJ, on the other hand, went all out.

It was something to do with Will’s love for beer and his frat-boy attitude. Explaining to them that morning in the bullpen that the best parties on his college campus were around St. Patrick’s day and Mardi Gras, making February and March party central in his life.

They walked in with little Henry, decked out in green from head to toe. Green beads around his neck, gold chocolate coins in a basket, and the cutest little shamrock light-up head bopper.

“Look at you!!” Y/N called out to Henry as she walked into the room. Opening her arms up and leaning down to pick him up as he ran into her arms.

“Any Y/N!” Henry called her, not being able to say his T’s yet.

She pressed his tiny cheek against her face as she picked him up and snuggled him against her chest. It was getting harder to pick him up now that she was pregnant but she wasn’t going to miss a Henry snuggle.

“Since when did the FBI consult with leprechauns?” She asked him, booping her nose against him.

“Nooo,” Henry leaned back in her arms, “I’m not a leopard-con,” he tried his best to say the word. Making the team all laugh.

“Well, either way, why’s my favourite little guy here today?”

“Hey?” Spencer complained.

She leaned her elbow into him, “hi unca Spence,” Henry smiled at him. Spencer ran his fingers through Henry’s hair, messing it up under the headband.

“He wanted his godparents to see his outfit before the party at daycare today!” JJ explained with excitement.

Y/N placed him back on his feet, “go on the, show it off!”

He walked around the room, doing a fake model strut as he shook his diapered butt, walking towards the stairs before running back. “Woooow!” Everyone clapped and cheered.

Y/N looked up from Henry’s gaze, seeing Emily in Hotch’s office with a blond woman she didn’t recognize, “what’s going on in there?” She pointed.

“They’ve been in there all morning,” Rossi explained. “I think that’s the girlfriend.”

“How so?” Spencer asked, moving across the room to get a better view through the blinds.

“The way Emily leans against her, hand on her arm like that as she speaks. That’s the same way you and lady boy-wonder act when you’re in there together,” Rossi raised an eyebrow at them.

“Ahh,” Y/N smirked. “I wonder what happened, no one talks to Hotch with the door closed unless they need us to look into something.”

“I’ve gotta go,” Will cut in, scooping Henry up from the carpet with a tight-lipped smile.

“Bye buddy,” Y/N scrunched her nose at him, getting in close to press their noses together. “Have a good day today.”

“Bye, love you,” JJ kissed both her boys and watched them leave the room.

“they’re the best,” Y/N said as she wrapped an arm around JJ.

“Anyone want to go sit and have coffee while we wait for them?” Derek asked prior to a long yawn.

Rossi patted Derek on the back, leading him up the stairs and towards the briefing room. The remaining team members following their lead, discovering fresh donuts and flowers waiting for them.

“A gift for helping in advance, -Noelle” Read the small card on the table.

“Emily’s girlfriend?” JJ pondered, holding the card up and waving it slightly.

“I like her already,” Derek said, kicking his feet back and taking a donut.

Hotch walked in with Emily and Mindy 45 minutes later. Following them was a beautiful blond woman, probably 6’1 even in her flat running shoes. She was wearing cuffed blue skinny jeans and a big Barbie Pink petticoat.

She smiled lightly as she walked in, glueing herself to Emily’s side. “This is Noelle, my partner, Noelle these are my co-workers.”

“Hi!” She waved, “let me guess. Chocolate thunder, Derek Morgan.” She pointed to the nearest person to her.

“Correct,” Derek nodded in her direction.

“You would have to be Penelope Garcia,” she guessed right once again. “Emily was right, your aura is very bright.”

“Oh,” Penelope blushed.

“Y/N and Spencer, she said you’d be basically sitting on top of each other,” making everyone on the team laugh. “JJ, she said you’re like wonder woman, you look more like you could be cast as Super Girl if you ask me.”

JJ blushed, “thank you, Henry would agree.”

“Rossi, I already knew you. I love your books,” she fangirled a little. Something Rossi was incredibly used to.

“Signing hours are from 6-8,” he teased her.

Noelle laughed, her smile wide and toothy. “It’s lovely to meet you all.”

“Noelle has come in today with concerns that local gay men in her circle of friends are going missing. Over the last few holidays, 3 of her friends have disappeared. Dropping all contact after a trip to the bar,” Hotch explained.

“I’m a firefighter,” Noelle explained. “I have a Facebook group of friends who are gay and in the forces in any capacity. Just to let each other know where they’re going, to be safe.”

“Smart system,” Rossi complimented. “But also incredibly easy for someone to pose as trustful to gain access and track them.”

“That’s what I was thinking,” Emily’s pressed lip smile portraying just how uncomfortable she was with the situation. “I’ve met our supposed victim number 3. Officer Perry is a great man and we haven’t heard from him since Friday.”

“Where was he going?” Y/N asked.

“He was at the bar with us on Friday for a little, we got a few beers and then he said he was meeting with a guy he met online, he was never big into online dating or even dating in general. He didn’t know how to be an officer and gay at the same time,” Noelle explained the situation fully. “He is one of my best friends, I excused it Saturday when he didn’t call cause I guessed he was having a good time. But when he missed Sunday dinner I knew something was wrong. I begged Emily to let me pitch this to you.”

“I believe you,” Hotch added. “Which is why I’ve asked Mindy Patel from VICAP to join us today.”

Mindy waved, she dressed more like a techie than an agent. Beanie, headphones on her neck and a big black sweater.

“Strauss and I agreed it would be beneficial to have a member of the team solely responsible for going through VICAP coincidences and letting us know. We stumble across too many rare cases thanks to Y/N and Mindy,” Hotch explained. “Mindy Patel is now officially VICAP Liaison. Her office will be across from Garcia’s from now on, she’s going to be our eyes and ears in the missing person world for the time being.”

“I took into account the fact that your friends were all masc for masc, on the police force in some capacity and male obviously,” Mindy explained. “And I found the two men from Valentines Day and New Years, and then more going back every major holiday for the last 2 years as of this St. Patrick’s day.”

“We’ve compiled the data and sent it to Garcia, it’ll be on your tablets shortly,” Hotch confirmed. “I’d like everyone to split up into teams and take an apartment of the most recent 3 victims. Prentiss and Rossi, you get New Years’.”

“Yes sir,” Emily agreed. “Noelle can stay here with Penelope for insight.”

“Yes. Reid, Y/N and Morgan, you’ll take officer Perry’s apartment. It’s the freshest so I need the best eyes.”

“Absolutely,” they replied in unison.

“Myself and JJ are going to the Valentines Day abduction,” check in with Garcia when you need to, fill me in on everything. Good luck.”

—

“Yeah a cop lives here,” Y/N laughed as she searched through the carefully organized home. Combing the place over for the slightest abnormality.

“He definitely wasn’t taken,” Morgan agreed. “He went willingly and never made it home.”

Dust was starting to settle on his possessions. Photos on the wall looked blurry as the sun shined through the windows. It smelled stale, no one had opened the windows in a while and the man who lived here worked out.

His clothing was organized by category. His laundry had 3 separate baskets for darks, lights and colours. Inside his bedside drawers, all his condoms were lined up by type. He was definitely anal about something.

“Guys?” Spencer called from the office.

Morgan and Y/N followed the sound of his voice, seeing him hunched over an iMac. “I moved the mouse and it’s open and unlocked.”

“But you don’t know what to do?” She teased him.

“Yeah,” he blushed. Watching Y/N sit in the desk chair and start looking through his things.

“His Facebook is pretty basic, he checked in at the bar with a photo here of him with Emily and Noelle, and then he went offline. He doesn’t have Twitter or Tumblr logged in, so I’m guessing he doesn’t have that,” Y/N explains as she stalked his activity. “In his history, your male basics. Case research, pornhub, Facebook, Hotmail… hold on.”

She read through all the subjects, all looking pretty normal. “What would a gay man hiding his sex life from his co-workers disguise his emails as?”

“Work-out appointments,” Morgan answered almost too quickly.

‘Workout’ she typed into the search bar. Seeing 15 messages from another man named domworkouts@hotmail.com. “got him, call Garcia.”

“Hey baby girl,” Derek spoke softly as she answered. “We got Jensen Perry’s computer open, his email shows he’s been working out with a domworkouts@hotmail.com.”

“Already working my finger magic,” she teased him. Hanging up before he could say anything back.

“That woman will be the death of me,” he sighed.

“I don’t think we’ll find anything else here, our best bet is with Garcia,” Y/N admitted as she closed all the windows. “Wait,” she pulled up the search and typed in ‘find my iPhone,’ “if he has a Mac he has an iPhone, not many people blend their tech.”

Last ping: 2256 Sheerly Lane, Friday at 23:56.

“I’ll call Hotch while you drive,” Y/N said, pulling out her phone and following the men out the door.

Morgan followed the GPS 15 minutes down the street to an apartment complex. It was worn down and looked as if no one had taken care of it in the last 25 years. “I’m calling Garcia before you go in, I don’t feel good about this.”

“Hey doll,” Garcia’s cheery voice was a nice refresher.

“Hey, do you have any info on who owns and occupies 2256, Sheerly Lane?” Y/N asked softly. “Also send backup to this location, it’s where Perry’s iPhone is apparently and it looks sketchy as hell.”

She heard the clicking of the keys before she heard Garcia’s reply. “Yep, we have 1 occupant. Amy Romano, 46, left the building after her mother died. She’s been living there in room 333 for years, not renting any rooms out at all in the last 3 years.”

“A woman?” Morgan was shocked.

“Must be why we’ve never found the bodies, female serial killers are 90% less likely to ever be caught,” Reid added his fun fact, one she’s heard from him a handful of times before.

“Exactly,” Y/N agreed. “What do we know about her?”

“She’s an interesting one,” Garcia’s tone changed. “Her father was a minister, big bible freak. Her mother was the maid here at the hotel before being given the deed from the original owner’s family. She died in 1988.”

“How much of the religious upbringing rubbed off on her?”

“Enough to make her have multiple psychotic breaks, being diagnosed with schizophrenia when she was 15,” Garcia gained more insight. “Claimed to have been visited by God, and was told sinners are punished by word of god. That one day she would be the one to follow his word for the righteous man.”

“What if she’s doing her own form of conversion therapy?” Y/N gasped. “She’s not killing them. She’s following god’s word and freeing them from their sins. This is the perfect place to keep them. Locking them in rooms away from each other, secluding them and only subjecting them to a female for long periods of time.”

“Garcia, we need back up right now,” Morgan stressed.

“they’re 4 minutes out, good luck in there my babies.”

“See you soon, baby girl.”

Being left out of raids was weird to her, watching Spencer put on a bullet-proof vest and load his gun without her cover made her anxious. Luckily, she got to stand with JJ outside. Watching the building as they listened over their radiofrequency.

“Clear,” Morgan spoke over the system.

“Clear here as well,” Hotch said. “Meet me at the stairwell.”

“I hate this,” Y/N whispered.

JJ ran her hand along Y/N’s back softly, “me too.”

“Floor 3, room 33,” Hotch explained. “I’ll kick in the door, Morgan, you enter first. Spencer and Prentiss, follow our lead.”

Not having a visual was the worst part. There was no way to know where they were or who was there. They worked on sounds, if and when the team decided to speak.

“1, 2, 3,” Morgan whispered before they heard the door smash in. “FBI!”

Then it was silent again, too quiet for anyone’s liking, staring up at the third floor trying to hear everything in the neighbourhood.

“Amy Romano put the gun down!”

“No!” They heard before 4 shots were fired.

Y/N’s heart was in her throat; she couldn’t hear anything going on inside. The officers asked over the radio for updates, hearing nothing in return. Y/N couldn’t stop herself from running towards the apartment buildings before anyone could catch her. Up 3 flights of stairs, drawing her gun and walking towards the room.

Morgan was shot in the arm, down. Prentiss, hiding behind a table with Morgan and Spencer as she tried to stop the bleeding. Hotch in the unsub’s grasp, fighting for a gun.

Hotch noticed Y/N in the doorway. Kicking the unsub down. Y/N wrapped her arm around the unsub’s neck, putting her in a headlock as Hotch attempted to cuff her. She struggled like a wet fish against them, slipping out of her grasp and falling to the floor.

“If God wants to tell me to stop, he’ll tell me himself!” She screamed.

Y/N presses her gun to her head, “he just did.”

“Amy Romano you’re under arrest for the kidnapping of 24 men, attempted murder of a federal agent and resisting arrest,” Hotch explained as he cuffed her.

“Y/N!” Spencer stood up, looking at her like she was the crazy person. “We agreed, 3rd trimester, no fieldwork.”

“You didn’t reply on the radio and suddenly I was here,” Y/N explained, “I’m sorry.”

“We need EMTs, Morgan’s been shot in the arm. The bleeding is under control, just hurry.” Prentiss ordered over the radio.

“Y/L/N is going to need to get checked as well,” Spencer added.

“Why?”

“You ran up three flights of stairs, wrestled an unsub and got elbowed in the side,” Spencer explained, taking her hand and leading her out of the room.

“I’m sorry, I get it now I really do,” Y/N stopped him in the hallway, holding him in her arms. “I don’t like when I can’t see that you’re safe.”

Spencer kissed the top of her head, “I love you.”

“The baby’s kicking,” she replied softly, “that’s good right? 4 movements in 30 minutes after activity is a good thing.”

Spencer laughed, pulling back to feel her belly. “I’m sure he’s all hopped up on adrenaline now, come on let’s get him looked at quickly.”

—

They found 16 of the 24 men alive and in critical condition inside the apartment building. SCSI was canvassing the scene with local cops, taping up the building and surrounding property while the city discussed demolishing the building altogether.

Y/N was able to witness Noelle running into Jensen Perry’s arms, hugging him as they cried in his hospital bed. Y/N could imagine the trauma he was going through, the terror and the fear of something you really don’t want, happening anyway.

“Why do people do terrible things in the name of God?” Y/N whispered towards Spencer, looking up at him with soft eyes. Truly curious.

“The religious system runs similarly to cults, they believe the words are to be followed and thus they will gain entrance to heaven. If there’s one thing humans are afraid of more than dying, it’s internal damnation. Holding the fact that they will suffer in death over their head is a way to get them to do anything.” Spencer explained softly. “With the right person, the wrong message can actually sound like a pretty good thing.”

Y/N let out a deep sigh, “how do you raise a good child in a fucked up world?”

“Matthew, 18; 1 through 5, At that time the disciples came to Jesus and said, “Who then is greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” And He called a child to Himself and set him before them, and said, “Truly I say to you, unless you are converted and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven.” Spencer repeated the bible verse softly. “Whoever then humbles himself as this child, he is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever receives one such child in My name receives Me.”

Y/N smiled, “I like that.”

“He was always supposed to be good, he has you as his mother.”

chapter 24

April rolled around out of nowhere. Suddenly the snow had all melted, the birds were returning, and the trees were starting to bud thanks to the week of thunderstorms.

Love was in the air, both in the wild and in Y/N’s life.

The wedding’s in 2 weeks and she’s growing daily. She wanted to wait till the last possible moment to get her dress. Wanting it to actually fit over her stomach on the big day without any struggle.

Being placed on office duty for the rest of her pregnancy made it easier, not being allowed to leave Mindy and Penelope's side, under direct order from Aaron Hotchner. She was starting to notice that the more pregnant she got, the more the men of the team wanted to protect her as well.

JJ said it was the same for her the first time, all the alpha personalities came out around the third trimester. It was like they didn’t quite register that a woman on the team was pregnant till it was abundantly clear.

The girls had all agreed to go to the dress store with Y/N when they had a free afternoon, but that didn’t seem to be happening any time soon. Y/N ended up going by herself between cases while Spencer was on a flight, trying on 6 different dresses before she found one that made her happy.

The sales associate was being extra nice to her, knowing she had both a big budget and no time. It was an easy sale, but this wasn’t an easy decision.

She tried a sleeveless, skin-tight number on first. Not being able to even move once she got in it, not even bothering to look in the mirror. It wasn’t right, that was for sure.

Eventually, by #5 they had an idea of what she wanted. Long sleeves to hide her stretch marks, it had to be flowy but still show off the bump. And she wanted lace, embroidery even. Something that made it different, something that was more like her. Always growing, changing, adapting.

She was wandering the racks when she saw it.

It was so long, the train had to be at least 6 feet. It was light, made with sheer fabric so it would twist and flow with whatever direction she ran or danced. She could imagine walking through the grass with the train flowing behind her with purpose.

The most wonderful aspect was the long sleeves and the neckline. Cupping her chest perfectly with a nice ribbon right above her bump. The entire dress reminded her of something, the floral embroidery sending her back to a dress she remembers from her childhood, not able to place it but knowing it in her heart.

She looked in the mirror at herself, she felt beautiful. She shook her head lightly as a tear fell down her cheek. “It’s perfect,” she whispered.

The sales associate shook a big bell then, causing everyone to look at her and cheer. “Are you saying yes?” She asked, as cheesy as it was, she loved it.

“Yes!” She cheered back, feeling the love from everyone in the store.

The dress was huge, she laid the bag against her passenger seat and stared at it for a while. It felt a little crazy that she was getting married in a few days, even crazier that she was having a baby in 2 months.

Her phone rang as she started to leave. “Hewwo?” She answered softly, knowing it was Spencer.

“I just got home, where are you?”

“Oh,” she smiled. “Penelope said you guys wouldn’t be back until 9, I went and picked out a dress.”

“Alone?” He sounded sad.

“It was better this way, I picked it for me and no one else,” she reassured him. “I’m on my way home now though baby, I’ll see you soon.”

“Okay, drive safe. I love you,” Spencer replied, his voice nothing more than a whisper.

“Love you too,” she hung up.

She sighed, turning on the stereo and driving home to her favourite albums. Driving alone was different for her now, she used to love just escaping into the Virginia wilderness, picking a road and an album and just going somewhere.

Driving with Spencer meant silence, hand-holding, humming and ha-ing as he discovered new facts that intrigued him. She loved it, the ambiance of Doctor Spencer Reid was not something you could replicate, it was special and calming and wonderful.

She couldn’t wait to get home to him.

He was waiting on the front porch as she rolled into the driveway. Joining her at the car, wanting to help her carry her things inside. “Hi,” she smiled at him as she stepped out.

He pulled her into a hug, kissing her cheek softly. “Want some help?”

“If you don’t mind carrying in my dress, I need to pee so bad!” She said, almost about to run inside when he stopped her.

“Like how bad?” He asked.

“Excuse me?”

“If you were to get surprised would you pee your pants?” He tried not to laugh as he asked.

“Spence?”

“Just go in,” he said softly.

She sighed, knowing what this meant. Walking up the stairs slowly, turning the doorknob just as slow. Not ready to have her eardrums blown out.

“Surprise!!”

Sure enough, there were balloons and flowers and her friends gathered all inside her front hall. “Oh my god?”

Penelope wrapped her in a hug first, “your first baby shower has to be special!”

“You guys really didn’t have to do this?” She was so shocked to be getting attention that she felt a little embarrassed.

“We wanted to,” JJ hugged her next, their bumps too big to hug normally, opting for more of a side snuggle. “I got you something to change into before we get started.”

Y/N took the small blue bag from her, kicking her shoes off before they went upstairs. Spencer joining with her wedding dress, hanging it in the closet and slipping back downstairs, unnoticed.

Y/N opened the gift bag on her bed, JJ looked around the room for the first time ever. Looking at the photos of their first day of kindergarten on the wall, the artwork they chose. How Spencer wrote notes to her on the mirror with whiteboard markers.

“You guys are really cute,” she smiled.

“Thanks,” she smiled.

Finally taking the dress out of the bag, it was just something simple. Blue with pink flowers. Something she’d definitely pick out on her own. “This is so beautiful!”

“I got it when I was pregnant with Henry and never had a chance to wear it,” She smiled, “thought that you’d like it more.”

Y/N hugged her, “seriously this is the best thing you guys could’ve done for me!”

“I’m also going to need a pink dress,” JJ said softly in her grasp.

“No?” Y/N was shocked. “Really a mini JJ?”

“Yeah,” she smiled softly. “Hurry up we have more surprises for you downstairs!”

—

It took her longer than she hoped to get changed. The baby was just big enough to make her winded all the time now. Having to stop and take a breather just from taking her pants off. Not to mention the struggle of standing up after peeing.

When she finally made it back down the stairs on her swollen feet, she heard a familiar giggle that she loved very much. “You didn’t?”

JJ smiled, “it was Rossi and Will, they flew them all in and got them here.”

Her parents, brothers and wives were all in the kitchen waiting for her. Then she saw Diana, who was pressed up close to Spencer having a conversation in their own little world.

She walked in and cried, hugging her parents for the first time in 5 months. Showing off her big baby bump and chunky face for the first time too.

“You look amazing!” Her mom complimented her, taking her hand and making her spin slowly.

“Thank you, I feel huge,” she smiled. “I can’t believe you guys are here, I’m literally coming home in 2 weeks!”

“When David Rossi calls you and says he has a jet picking us up, you don’t just say no,” her father laughed, wrapping his arm around Rossi. They were going to be something else together.

She gave Diana a big hug when she could, watching her rub her belly and talk to the baby through her stomach for a good 10 minutes. It was so cute, everyone in the room watched and swooned. Secretly always hoping Spencer’s family got a moment like this.

After dealing with the Riley Jenkins case, and Gideon leaving, they worried for him. They never expected him to just show up one day with a girl and start the rest of his life the way he did. But it just made sense. He sped through school and early adulthood well before Y/N, now they’re moving fast, just together.

They had pizza for dinner, spreading 6 different kinds across the counter and telling everyone to dig in. Y/N took a slice and walked around, mingling with everyone to ensure she thanked them for coming.

“Henry!” She finally found him with Chloe and Lizzie. He ran into her arms, giving her a big hug. “Did you meet my niece?”

“You’re my any?” He questioned her right back.

“Come here Clo,” she called her over, huddling them both in close to her. “You both get to call me aunty Y/N, isn’t that so cool? You’re new friends and you share an aunty!”

Chloe gave her a big hug, she was getting bigger and bigger every day, about to turn 4 in a few months. It felt a little crazy, but she wouldn’t have it any other way.

“How are you?” She asked her softly.

“I’m good,” she whispered at her, smiling before hiding her face in her dress.

“Are you having fun here? Did you meet buddy yet?”

“No!” Chloe’s face lit up.

“Well, what are we waiting for?” She gasped at them both, getting back up to her feet and walking with them to where Buddy hid in the laundry room.

He was curled into a ball in a basket of towels, peaceful in the quietest room in the house.

Chloe and Henry took turns petting Buddy, kissing his head and playing with his tail, it was good for him to get a little used to grabby kid's hands. She was a little worried about how he’d handle a baby, but he was a chill cat he never really cared about attention as long as he was fed.

Eventually, JJ and Lizzie found them, peeling them away from the cat with the promise of cake while Y/N opened her gifts from everyone.

Everyone was watching her as she sat down in the living room, feeling a little anxious like she had to perform for them or something. Spencer finally joined her on the couch then, wrapping his arm around her in a soothing motion.

“So,” Garcia started. “I took it upon myself to organize the party but I didn’t just stop there, I also emailed everyone a link to a chart where they could pick the category of gift they got you so that we avoided repeats and got everything you would need.”

“This is all so much,” she turned bright pink. “You guys really didn’t have to I feel like I haven’t bought anything for myself since I met Spencer.”

“Nonsense!” Penelope hushed her. “Here, pick whatever one grabs your fancy.”

Y/N’s eyes raked over the pile of gifts, “um that big one over there, why not.”

It was a big blue bag, stuffed to the brim with tissue paper. The card on the handle was signed, she opened it to find 'from; Erin Strauss' on it. “Oh?”

“She couldn’t come but she passed that along on behalf of the section,” Hotch explained.

Y/N didn’t waste any time opening it. Finding brand named everything that she would need for breastfeeding, losing her mind at the never-ending bag.

Almost every gift was the same, all themed and absolutely filled. She was never going to have to buy anything for Matthew, she got it all today.

Hotch and Haley got her a babies bath essentials set. Her parents equipped her with every form of linen she would ever need for a baby, as well as a quilt made just for Matthew.

Penelope bought easily $400 in clothes for him over the past 7 months, with the promise of not stopping any time soon. Derek and Emily got together to buy them an all-terrain stroller, for the walks they expect them to take down the back roads. Emily’s girlfriend even brought a mom after-care set for her.

Diana’s gift made her cry the most, opening the box to find old copies of childhood books. “Those were all Spencers when he was a child,” she explained softly. “His love for the world started with those stories, I would like for Matthew to know them too.”

“Absolutely,” Y/N wiped the tears off her face, leaning over to hug her. “If Matty ends up being even half as wonderful as Spencer I’ll be grateful.”

“Spencer, did you get her anything?” Diana asked him softly as she was still mid embrace with Y/N.

“It’s in the garage,” Spencer smiled.

She looked at him with excitement, “you didn’t!”

“I might have,” he smiled.

“What?” Rossi asked, hating suspense more than anyone on the team.

“I was joking about wanting to get an SUV and become a soccer mom,” Y/N’s whole face lit up. “Did you get me a soccer mom mobile?”

He smiled back at her, “here.”

She held the key in her hand, her car was old as hell. She has had it since she moved to Virginia and even then it was a 2004 model. She had never had a new car, with the fresh car smell and clean everything!

“I am so overwhelmed,” she announced, bouncing a little in her seat as she shook her hands. Stimming just a small amount in front of everyone in all the excitement.

“We’re all done celebrating you now, I think we can start getting out of your hair, right guys?” JJ stood and pressured everyone that wasn’t relying on their house for the night, out the door.

Penelope helped Debbie and Diana clean everything up around the house. Peeling Henry and Chloe away from each other was the most difficult part of the night, becoming fast friends and wanting to look at books all night together in uncle Spencers library.

Rossi offered to let her brother Levi and his wife stay at his place while Diana and Y/N’s parents took the guest room in her home. Harrison and Faith driving back to Fort Meade to their own house.

—

Y/N and Spencer sat up in their bed, leaning against the headboard as they listened to the quiet of their house. Their co-workers were gone, their parents were settled in the guest rooms and most likely still awake from the time difference. The day had been so crazy that she barely had time to wrap her head around it.

“So…” Y/N cut the awkward silence. “Wanna make out?”

He laughed at her, shaking his head. “Remember the last time you asked me to do that?”

“Yeah, I lost my virginity,” she whispered back at him. A little scared that everyone could hear them talking.

“We can't,” Spencer looked at her with wide eyes. “It's bad enough my mother knows I’ve had sex once let alone possibly hearing us.”

He nudged him a little, crawling into his lap and sitting there softly. Her belly pressed against him, filling the space between them as she held his face in her hands.

“They’re on the other side of the house,” she pouted. “Just make out with me?”

He kissed her quickly once, “why are you so needy tonight?”

“All day I’ve had everyone's attention but yours,” she explained softly. “I missed you and I want my Spencer time.”

He couldn’t say no to that, because he felt the exact same way. He ran his hands up her thighs, over her hips and finally resting them on her back. She ran her thumbs over Spencer's cheeks, looking at him softly as she tilted her head to really admire him.

His lips were perfect, his nose was adorable. The way his stubble grew in and darkened his jaw was amazing. His bone structure, his eye colour, the way his hair just fell flawlessly into place with 0 effort. She sighed as she looked at him.

“I love you,” she whispered, biting back a smile as she waited for his response.

“I love you,” he giggled as he looked right back at her. It almost felt more intimate than sex, just staring into each other's eyes in a dimly lit bedroom, in the middle of the night.

She ran her hands up into his hair, combing her fingers through it. He tilted his head back every time, closing his eyes and enjoying the feeling. She was about to smile when she got a sharp shooting pain in her hips.

“Oh, my, god,” she breathed out. “Ouch?” She scrunched her face with the pain as the sharpness dulled into the bone, just feeling uncomfortable as she tensed up in his lap. She didn’t even realize she was tugging on his hair in response to the pain.

“What?” Spencer asked, concerned as all hell.

“I think that was Braxton hicks? It was like everything down there just lit up in pain,” she explained with a horrified look on her face.

He ran his hands softly over her hips, soothing the skin in an attempt to help. “Are they bad?”

“It just feels like a pinched nerve at first and then a dull ache, it’s not the worst. I don’t enjoy it that's for sure,” she laughed a little louder. “God, I hope he’s kind to me on the way out.”

“I was doing research into the best drugs and techniques for birth for mothers that don’t want any drugs either because they’re sober or they don’t want to be removed from the moment,” Spencer explained softly. “There are a lot of options if you want to look into them with me this week?”

“Of course you did,” she smiled at him once again, feeling a bit better. “We also have to pack the baby’s go-bag.”

Spencer laughed at the way she phrased it. “Isn’t it just a hospital bag and a diaper bag?”

“No, it’s a mission to have a baby. It’s a go-bag.”

They kept giggling with each other over the dumbest things, staring at smiling as they laughed. Spencer’s hands roamed her back while she poked his face. Happily just talking in each other's space about the most random shit.

It was what she loved the most about him, that they could equally ramble about what they found interesting and the other felt just as excited about learning something new. They had mutual respect for each other's interests and feelings that ran deeper than most, truly loving every word that left their partner's mouth.

By the time they settled against the pillows and attempted to sleep it was half 1 in the morning. They turned all the lights out and still just stared at each other.

She booped his nose softly with her own, watching him scrunch his face as a result before giggling again.

“Do you have any idea what the case tomorrow will be?” She was only asking because she wanted more time with him, needing to find every topic to bring up so that the night never ended.

“Mindy’s pitching something to us tomorrow again,” he whispered. “You’ll be good at this one.”

“Oh I’m excited now okay, goodnight,” she closed her eyes and pretended to snore, making him snuggle in and wrap her arms around him, pulling her in close the way they liked it.

“I love you, bunny,” he said one last time for the night.

She sighed as she settled into him, “I love you more Spence.”

[imaginesfor-thesoul]

spencer reid x Hotch! daughter 

PART TWO ( you can find part one here)

word count: 3.7k 

A/N: I’m so sorry this took so long, thank you guys so much for all the support on the first part.

:: :: :: 

The board room in the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the FBI was bustling. To an unfamiliar eye, the scattered papers, photographs and maps all across the floor would indicate that a hurricane had blown through the room. Though this madness, as chaotic as it may be, was a methodical look into a profilers brain.

In the eye of the hurricane, sat (y/n). She would fidget with the rings on her fingers or tap her foot against the ground. Now two days into the investigation, the possibility that they may not find Lacy alive plagued (y/n). 

Across the room, Spencer Reid was working on a geographical profile centered around the home that Amber (deceased), Lacy (missing) and (y/n) (Currently fucking terrified) shared.

“I’ve been looking over the note that the unsub left, I noticed something in the second line.” Prentiss announced. “-and don’t worry, I cared for Amber in her last moments. I took her last breath with poise and precision” She quoted.

(y/n)’s foot tapped a little harder. Unbeknownst to her, noted by a gentle eyed Spencer. 

Prentiss continued, “The emphasis on care, precision and poise determines almost a sincere effort to impress and please whoever found the note. These sound like the words of a female unsub. An incredibly insecure female unsub at that.”  She concluded. 

The team collectively agreed with this theory and continued on. 

Derek sat down at the table next to (y/n). “So, we know you’ve still got your phone on you, have you turned it on since you left?” He asked.

(y/n) shook her head “No, I haven’t just incase it’s being tapped.” Suddenly her fingernails became oh so interesting once more. 

Derek nodded in understanding. “Right, okay, now listen (y/n), I know it’s going to be scary but after we give the profile and do the press conference, I’m going to need you to turn that phone back on for me, it may be our only contact with our unsub.” 

This made (y/n)’s heart feel as though it were about to stop. The continual state of shock and fear that she remained in, had manifested  a sense of detachment and disconnect to the whole case. This roped her right back in to the center of the case. 

A quick nod was enough of answer for Derek as he shot a friendly wink her way. Getting up he said “Thanks kid, you know, you’re really doing great.” Before walking off. 

Replacing Dereks absence, (y/n)’s father, SSA Aaron Hotchner took a seat next to his visibly overwhelmed daughter. “How are you holding up?” He placed a loving arm around her shoulder and pulled her in.

A quiet stream of tears slid down her cheek as she hid her face into his chest, “I’m ready to wake up now, dad.” 

This killed him. A breaking father holding his broken daughter.

(y/n) held her head back up and excused herself to the restroom.

Above the hum in the room, Hotch cleared his throat, gathering everyone’s eager attention. “We are ready to present our profile. JJ, get in contact with the local PD’s and bring them all here this afternoon, we are going to need as much help as we can get.”

JJ nodded obediently and rushed out of the room straight to her office. 

:: :: ::

(y/n) sat quietly and patiently as she listened to her father and his team deliver their profile. They determined that the unsub was female, insecure and incredibly manic. The impulsive nature of this unsub means that anyone in contact with her must be prepared for her erratic behavior. This behavior may present itself through violence, self harm, or fleeing. 

Every mention of Lacy and Amber made her flinch. She knew what she had to do once these meetings were over, and she was terrified.

The core team filed back into the board room and (y/n) placed her phone onto the table. Morgan spoke up. “If you are right about the unsub tapping your phone, shortly after turning it on there is a large chance our unsub will try to contact you.”

“Reid!” Hotch grabbed the young genius’ attention. “Can you prep (y/n) for the call, it has to be her on the phone.” 

(y/n) and Spencer sat down across from each other next to a window. Far from all the chatter. Reid looked at (y/n). And suddenly, momentarily, it was like they were back on the floor of the bullpen. Something about the two of them was magnetic, there was no longer a killer that had killed one roommate and kidnapped the other, there was no unsub, no threat of security. But for now, there was a more pressing issue hand, so this spontaneous, charismatic revelation of love and soul would have to be pushed to the side. Though a silent mutual understanding had been made next to that window. That was for later.

Clearing his throat, Reid began. “Right, I’ll go over the basics for you.” He was being overly professional. Not only does he have FBI guidelines to follow, but also this gorgeous, incredible young woman’s father right across the room. Suppressing every urge in his being, he continued.

(y/n) listened with wide eyes, panic blowing on the back of her neck. 

“You need to keep the unsub on the phone for as long as you can, okay? Garcia will be tracking where the call is coming from, but the more time she has the better.”  Reid hesitated when he saw (y/n)’s hand begin to tremble. All he want to do was place her small hand in his, look her in the eye and assure her that everything will be okay. But he couldn’t. He cleared his throat “Um okay also, don’t let the conversation get off topic, we want as many hints as to where Lacy could be, her…condition-” 

A glaze glimmered across (y/n)’s eyes. The saddest glimmer the young profiler had ever seen. Reid could see she was trying to hold it together. 

“We’ll all be here with you. Your father, Rossi, all of us.”  (y/n) nodded, a lone tear escaping her.

Instinctively, Reid’s hand lay gently on top of her own. He gave in to yearning. The second (y/n) and Reid finally connected, a new star found its way into the sky. A rosebud bloomed and all the birds sang.

“I’ll be there.” He concluded.

(y/n)’s heart was fighting its way out of her chest. “Okay…” She began. “I can do this, we can do this.”

Reid nodded.

“For Lacy.”

“(y/n), Reid. We’re all set up. Ready when you are.” Garcia announced from across the room.

Reid quickly detracted his hand, (y/n) instantly felt a sense of loss and longing for its return.

Taking a deep breath, (y/n) responded back with a (hopefully) confident sounded “I’m ready.”

She sharply stood up and found her way over to the large table where the rest of the team had already crowded around. A speaker sat in the center, as well as veins of wires spreading between all sorts of machinery.

Taking a seat next to her father, she felt his hand make its way to her shoulder. 

“You’ve got this, (y/n). I’m right here next to you. She can’t hurt you from here.” Hotch told his shaking daughter. She leaned into his hand before sitting back up straight.

“Okay… turn it on.”

Garcia reached across the table grabbing the phone. Holding down the power button, the screen began to light up. The room got silent.

36 seconds.

36 seconds of sheer panic.

36 seconds of pure silence.

36 seconds and (y/n) and Spencer Reid’s eyes did not leave one and others.

The hum of a ringtone slices through the silence. The tension cut short. 

“Show time.” Rossi says quietly, shooting (y/n) a look of encouragement. 

(y/n) looks to her father one last time before grabbing the phone. “Hello?” She asks. Struggling to hear anything past the bulldozing beat of her screaming heart. 

Garcia connects the phone to the speaker so everyone could hear. 

There was a low trill which was slowly getting louder. a laugh. not a maniacal laugh. more like a hysterical, painful, uncontrollable roar. 

All eyes across the table dart to one and other, not entirely sure of how to proceed. 

The laughing finally ceases. “It’s good to hear from you, (y/n). I’ve missed you.” The woman drawls. 

A shiver ran down her spine. “Do you have Lacy?” (y/n) ignored the tremble in her voice, using all of her power to not burst into tears. 

The woman on the phone chuckled once more. “You mean the bitch that won’t stop whining and screaming?! I’m surprised you can’t hear her.”

Prentiss nodded and whispered in a hushed tone “This is a good sign Lacy’s still alive.”

Morgan leaned over to Garcia. “You got it, baby girl?” He asked

“Just need a little longer to work my magic” Garcia responded. 

“C-can i talk to her?” (y/n) asked. 

Spencer looks to her worryingly. As if trying to warn her, she may not like what she hears. 

There was a slight pause, the static on the line held steady. 

“I think that’s going to have to be a no.” The woman on the phone decided.  “Bye now, (y/n) See you soon.” She said

Before (y/n) could even process, the line goes dead. She instantly looks to Garcia. “We’ve got a location!” She announces

A big sigh of relief falls over the table. 

Hotch stands quickly, grabbing his jacket. “Right, let’s head out.”

:: :: :: 

Crammed in the SUV, Hotch and (y/n) took the front two seats, with Hotch driving. Spencer and Rossi took the back two seats, and the others traveled in a operate vehicle. 

“So we can definitely determine that you have come in contact with this unsub before, or at least she has come in contact with you.”  Spencer piped up while Hotch weaved through traffic.

“Did you recognize their voice?”Rossi asks (y/n).

(y/n) was once again fiddling with the rings on her fingers, “Uh…no, I don’t think I did.” The entire car ride her thoughts felt like the static on the other end of that phone call. She couldn’t think of any thing other than Lacy. Hoping, pleading that she would be okay.

A petit blue house at the end of a road was surrounded by flashing sirens and yellow tape.  This was it. (y/n) thought. They were getting Lacy back.

Hopping out of the van, (y/n) was instantly fitted with a bulletproof vest.  Her father, also wearing a vest, made his way towards her. “Listen, there’s a chance that we’re going to need you in there. I’ll do everything in my power to make sure it doesn’t come to that. But I need you to be ready… just in case, okay?” Hotch looked at his daughter, the pair both had matching vests and matching teary eyes.

Not letting any tears spill, (y/n) nodded harshly. “Okay, I just can’t wait for this to be over.”

Hotchner sighed and agreed. “Me too kid-“ Placing his hands on her shoulders, he continued “We’ve got to go in now. I love you, (y/n). Always.” He pulled her into a welcome bone-crushing hug.  

“I love you too, Dad.” She whispered, before letting go, and watching her dad, Prentiss and Morgan file into the old house, after kicking down the door of course.

Looking to her left, (y/n) noticed the doe-eyed genius had stayed behind. “Aren’t you supposed to be in there too?” She inquired. Not really caring about the answer, more just trying to distract from the deafening static that comes with a side of panic and trauma.

Reid smiled slightly. “Oh I asked to stay behind with you. Just so…you know, in case you do need to go in, you don’t have to be by yourself.”

This was the first time (y/n) had seen Spencer less than 100% sure of what he was saying. But she couldn’t help but admit the relief and gratitude she felt after hearing this.

Looking him in the eyes, that familiar magnetism returned. “Thank you.”

:: :: ::

Almost 6 minutes had gone by, and (y/n) was getting nervous. 

“What do you think is taking them so long?” (y/n) asked Spencer. 

Just as he was about to respond, both radios attached to their vests began to sound. Amidst the harmony of static and beeping, the pair could make out Prentiss’  voice saying. “Bring (y/n) in. I repeat, bring (y/n) in. Slowly.”

(y/n)’s heart sunk. “Fuck.” Was all that she could muster up. 

Instinctively, Spencer reached for (y/n)’s hand once more, this time with no plan of letting go. “Hey, it’s okay (y/n). I’ll be right here with you.”

Following his lead, (y/n) could barely feel her legs. Entering the building, she quickly assessed the room. To her left, Morgan and Prentiss had their guns drawn, following their aim, she saw the back of a blonde woman’s head, she was scrabbling around screeching, fighting (y/n)’s father. Through the shock and haze, (y/n) couldn’t really process what was going on entirely. Looking even more to the right, she noticed Lacy, strapped to a chair, with a gag made of cloth surpassing whatever she was trying to say.

This was what it took to break (y/n) out of the daze. Making eye contacted with her missing, presumed dead roommate after days of worrying created a wave of emotion to crash through her. Sobbing, she screamed out “LACY!” Slipping out of Reid’s grasp and running towards her helpless friend.

The commotion between Hotch and the blonde woman halted, “(y/n)! It is just wonderful to see you again.” The familiar voiced drawled.

(y/n) looked towards the woman, instantly noting the large blade dangling between her thumb and finger. Finally, (y/n) made eye contact with the woman. The woman who killed amber. The woman who kidnapped and tortured Lacy. The woman who looked a bit too familiar.

“Sylvia.” (y/n) finally matched a name to that devious smile.

Sylvia chuckled. “Oh, so you DO remember me.” 

Of course she did. Sylvia was (y/n)’s old neighbor. A few weeks after moving in, (y/n) had met Sylvia one evening when they both arrived home at the same time. After some introductory small talk, (y/n) was invited in, though she didn’t want to be rude, she had already had such a long day at work and was ready to go to bed. Politely declining, in the following weeks she would see Sylvia every day. It seemed no matter what time (y/n) would come home, Sylvia would be there too. It was then things started to take a turn. Frequently, (y/n)’s power would go out, she’d awake to find her front door was wide open or that a faucet had been left on. She didn’t stay in that apartment for very long.

(y/n) quite literally hadn’t a tear left to shed. “Why are you doing this?” .

Lessening the grip on the blade, Sylvia became once again fixated on (y/n). (y/n) held her gaze, knowing what she was doing.

“All…all I’ve wanted from you, was a friend. I offered you tea. I tried to hang out with you. And what did you do?? YOU TURNED AROUND AND MOVED ACROSS TOWN WITH THOSE TWO BITCHES.” She was screaming now. 

Noting the vulnerability. Spencer took the opportunity to kick the blade out of Sylvia’s hand. 

“GO!” (y/n) cried as her father roughly grabbed Sylvia’s arms and forced them behind her back. “Don’t you ever even THINK about hurting my daughter ever again.” He threatened, venom spilling from his lips. 

Walking her out of the door. (y/n) rushed over to Lacy, along side Prentiss and Reid. Spencer unbound her hands while Prentiss and (y/n) worked on untying the gag. The moment she was released she threw her arms over (y/n) in a roaring sob of relief.

“Oh god, oh god. Thank you.” Lacy cried.

:: :: ::

The paramedics came in to take Lacy away to the hospital. Because of her fragility mentally and physically, no visitors were allowed to go with her for the time being. 

Before they knew it, the case was over. It had never felt real. 

Back in that SUV with her father, Spencer and Rossi, (y/n) couldn’t help but smile. Lacy was okay.

It was a longer drive back, there was no need to rush. The sun was setting. The highway lines glowed against the purple sky. An orange halo fell onto all of them. Glancing up into the rearview mirror, (y/n) caught Spencer’s eye. He smiled towards her. Her chest fluttered.  That was a quiet drive, but none of them seemed to mind.

:: :: ::

FOUR MONTHS LATER

It took about a week and a half for (y/n) to finish moving and unpacking all of the boxes in her new apartment. Though she had garnered some help from her father and Rossi.

On a warm summer Friday, (y/n) had decided to invite the BAU team over for a house-warming dinner party. Of course, her cooking would not be as excellent as Rossi’s homemade Italian cuisine she had come to know and love. Since Sylvia, Hotchner had been a lot more open about bringing (y/n) into the office. She had formed quite a bond with the team members, specifically a certain cardiganned doe eyed genius.

It was 5PM now, 1 hour until she told everyone to come. (y/n) wore sweats as she attempted to makeup her face a little. It was then that the doorbell rang. Jumping up, (y/n) only assumed that it was her father. He was always way too early. Opening the door, she was shocked to see Spencer standing there.

“Oh! Hey Spence.” She invited him in, instantly becoming overly aware of what she was wearing, how she was standing and only having one eyebrow done. Being so fixated on this, she didn’t recognize the unusual nervousness Reid was exhibiting. He rocked back on forth on his feet, not being able to find the right words.

“Hey, uh, sorry I’m so early. I just wanted to talk to you about something real quick before everyone else got here.” He managed to stumble out. 

(y/n) nodded for him to continue, feeling slightly worried. 

“Do you remember when we first met? On the floor of the bullpen at the BAU?” He posed, somewhat out of nowhere. 

(y/n) smiled fondly. “Of course I do, silly.” 

“Well,” Reid started up again. “Ever since that morning, I have never been the same.” He stopped abruptly, checking in with (y/n), making sure he wasn’t scaring her.

(y/n)’s heart skipped a beat,   “Go on…” She prompted.

“It’s just that, every time I look at you, my brain slows down. All I can think about is you. I don’t even have to be in the same room as you, but If I think of you, which I do often, you’re all I can focus on. At first I thought there was something wrong with me, but then, I realized that this wasn’t a bad thing.” 

A small smile found it’s way to (y/n)’s face. Hopefully she was correct about the direction that this was going.

“You see, (y/n), I WANT to only think about you, because when I do, I feel as though the sun is dancing all around me. When we look at each other, It feels like magic. Like the world was made for us to be in the same room. Please, tell me you feel it too.” Reid’s ramblings pause.

Sighing, (y/n) takes a step closer to him. “Well it’s about time you said something. I was worried it was just me.” Her smile widened as did his.

“Thank god.” Spencer quickly muttered, and before she knew it his large hands were on the sides of her face slipping into her hair. The moment their lips connected it were as if lightening had escaped from within them. It was electrifying.

(y/n) and Spencer made their way onto the couch as their hands gripped all over each other.

An electrical storm of love and soul consumed them. Breaking apart only to catch their breath.

Suddenly a loud chime made it’s way from the door. (y/n) shot up straight. “Shit what time is it??”.

Spencer glanced at his watch. “5:58” He reported. 

Getting up, she whispered just incase whoever was behind the door had recently acquired super hearing. “Can you get the door? I have to finish getting ready. Also, you should probably fix your hair so you don’t look like we just made out for 40 minutes.” With a wink she left the young agent with a passionate  kiss before running off to her room.

Frantically completing her other eyebrow and applying lip gloss, (y/n) slipped on a new sundress. Past the door she could hear a couple of familiar voices. Taking a breath she smoothed out her dress and opened the door.

In her living room, she found a JJ, Garcia, Morgan and her father. While the girls complimented her look, she gave her dad a quick hug as they waited for the rest of the team to arrive.

Emerging from the kitchen with two glasses of water, was an awestruck Reid. He not-so-subtly looked her up and down before shortly clearing his throat and handing her a glass. 

“If I didn’t know any better I’d think boy wonder had a crush.” Morgan chuckled. Almost everyone found this amusing. However, Hotch’s face didn’t show even a glimmer of amusement.

Brushing it off swiftly, (y/n) and Spencer subconsciously stood a little farther apart than normal.

The night continued on as the rest of the team showed up. At this point, everyone was at the very least a little bit drunk. Some more than others (Prentiss went hard).

While everyone was laughing huddled around the loud kitchen, Spencer took this opportunity to lean and whisper to (y/n). “I like the lipstick.”

(y/n) blushed, something she wasn’t quite used to the feeling of. “It’s a good thing you interrupted me before I had the chance to put it on, otherwise your face may be stained right about now.” 

He jokingly rolled his eyes at her as they seamlessly rejoin the conversation.

At the dinner table, the riotous chatter continued, and somewhere, at some point, Spencer and (y/n)’s hands had found their way into each others.  Out of sight from everyone else, however nothing else was on their minds.

:: :: :: FIN!!

Taglist: @ilovecriminalmindswithallmyheart @ellvswriting​ @screechingwagontacoprofessor @l0ve-0f-my-life @where-we-write @etherealgubler @sparklingkeylimepie @eleventhdoctorsangel @tpwksunflower @fandomgirl17 @chims-kookies @malfoys-demigod @thatweirdblonde @daviddobriksleftnut​ @kingworm​ @reidsmyhusband-emilysmymistress @pizzarollsfordayz​ @heckington​ @ssaic-jareau​

[aficwhore]

As I Lay Dying...(Part One)

Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader, Team x Reader

Warnings: violence, language, near death experience, reader injury, slight fluff

Word Count: 2,655

Summary: After having a dry spell the team go on a case, the unsub is kidnapping and killing women around the reader’s age and appearance. As she goes undercover the plan falls through, will she survive? (slow burn, sort of?)

A/N: So I wrote the first half of this and it was super long, like way too long, so I decided to split this into parts! Please let me know if you liked it and if I should post the last parts as well! Feedback please!!!! <3

Reader POV:

My neck started to strain as I intensely stared at my computer screen. Deciding to take a break from my paperwork and reports, I shove my chair back with a huff.

“Anyone else need more coffee?” I asked as I made my way from the bullpen to our small kitchenette, earning a few no’s and hums from the team.

I rinsed my mug of my coffee leftovers. I reached to pull the fresh brewed coffee pot, pouring most of it into my cup and adding a small dash of creamer and sugar. as I leaned against the counter, sipping my caffeine, Penelope struts in, “Hey baby cakes!”

“Hey,” I smile sheepishly, taking another swig of my drink.

“What’s with the gloomy energy? Did something happen, love?” The blonde questioned sincerely.

I shrugged, “We haven’t had a case in a while, not that it’s a bad thing, but I’m sick of sitting and staring at a screen all day.” I explained as I pulled myself up onto the counter.

She laughed, “Darlin’ I do that everyday! But u know you’re not used to it, so i hope you get a case soon, wait, no-“

We both burst into giggles, knowing what she meant. “Woah what’s so funny in here?!” Emily inquired, while stepping into the room.

“Pen here just said how she HOPES we get a case soon.” I chuckled.

“Oh god, i hate to say it, but me - fucking - too.” Emily chimed in. She walked over, taking the last of coffee into her cup, leaving it black. “Y/n, you better get back to your desk before Mr. Boss Man sees you goofing around,” she smirked, leaving Penelope and I alone again.

I rolled my eyes as I slid off the countertop. “Well thanks for the horrible wish Garcia,” I snickered, nudging her side as I passed by, heading to my dreaded workspace. I walked by Spencer’s desk, he leaned back in his chair, feet propped up. I took the opportunity to smack the back of his head lightly earning a quiet yelp from the genius.

“What was that for?!” Boy wonder squealed. I shrugged hearing Morgan snicker. With a loud sigh, I threw myself in my rolling chair, causing it to spin me around. Already stricken with boredom I started bouncing my leg, leading to my chair to start squeaking. I ignored the noise, struggling to focus on my report I was supposed to be writing. Just when I began typing someone yanked my chair and I away from my desk.

“Baby girl, we get it, you’re bored, but damn you’re annoying,” Morgan spoke, his voice laced with laughter.

Blushing slightly, I complained, “I’m sorry! i can’t take another day of paperwork! I just can’t! how do you all manage it?!”

“We are just as irritated Y/n, we'll get a case soon, ask Hotch to take a break and go walk around or something. Just please stop the noise.” Derek said, patting my shoulder. When I stood up, Hotch rushed into the room.

“Conference room in 5, we got a case.” Aaron huffed.

I excitedly jump up, “YES! FINALLY!” Earning stifled giggles from Emily, Spencer, and Derek.

We all rushed to the conference room, files and pens in hand, eager to get out of the bullpen for a little while. “Okay, so we have a case in Arlington, Texas. Three women were found dead in several construction sites, gagged and tied with burn marks across their chest. Two other women were reported missing two days ago, possibly taken by our unsub.” Rossi explains with a hardened look making its way to his face. 

“Okay team, wheels up in 30.” Aaron chimes in, breaking up our silence. 

As a whole we head to the desks and grab our to-go bags., tidying up our workspaces, to be ready for our reports when we get back. “Y/n, can you sit with me on the jet, I want to sleep and you’re the only one who really lets me sleep on their shoulder and keeps me warm.” Spencer asks with a quiet voice. 

“Of course pretty boy, anytime for you,” I answer with a smile. The both of us walk to the jet side by side, hand brushing against each other, his skin soft and cold compared to my warm one. We stayed quiet the whole time, until we made it into the jet, situating our bags and settling in. Spencer takes a window seat at one of the tables, I sit next to him as Hotch makes his way across from us. 

Once everyone is settled and ready to go, the jet starts us on our journey. Soon after Spencer begins to snore while his head lay on my shoulder. “What book are you reading now, Y/n?” Hotch questioned, nodding his head towards the novel in my hands. 

Lifting it to reveal the title, “Full Dark, No Stars, by Stephen King.” He raised his brow in examination. “It’s a novel composed of four different stories. They’re about murder, love affairs, such and such.” I slightly giggled.

Aaron chuckled, “Don’t you get enough of that stuff everyday? On the job?”

“The writing fascinates me, I don’t know why, maybe the same way romance novels entice ‘normal’ people.” I claim as I shake my head, shrugging a little.

“You’re something else,” the dark haired man added, going back to the newspaper in front of him. I turn my attention back to my book, getting lost in the pages. Spencer shifted in his sleep, laying down in my lap, tucking one of his arms underneath my legs, pulling me closer. Just like instinct, I used my free hand to play with his beautiful long hair. He began to softly hum from relaxation.  It seemed like hours, with Spencer contently asleep on my thighs and my hand tracing shapes on his chest. 

I felt a light tap on my shoulder, “Pretty boy still asleep?” Morgan examined from the couch next to us on the other side of the aircraft. I nodded. “Good, because we need to discuss the issue at hand.” I slowly closed my book with a confused look, placing it gently on the table. “The unsub is after women like you, about the same age, same height, same hair color. We don’t want you to feel pressured to do anything but-” 

“I’ll do it,” I cut Derek off. I looked at Aaron who was now listening.

He cleared his throat, “Are you sure? We knew Spencer would disagree if we asked while he was awake. If you are comfortable with this, we can brief you on our plan.”

I bowed my head in agreement. “Can we just keep it from this one?” motioning to the doctor snoring in my lap. Both men nodded, leaving the conversation at that. The jet filling with silence again as everyone, but us three, slept.

A bell rang above us, letting us know that we’d be landing in a few. I mildly shook Reid awake. His darting his eyes open and making eye contact with me.“Are we there?” he asked groggily. 

“Yea, sleep good babe?” The nickname causing him to blush, the nickname was platonic, or used to be until recently, now you called him it because you began to fall for the young man, hoping he would pick up what you were putting down. Though you made several attempts to make your flirting noticeable, Spencer seemed to dismiss them, or maybe not pay attention to them. 

“Y-yeah, I slept good, I was warm the whole time, thank you.” He spoke, patting you on your leg where he slept previously. 

Emily stood up and stretched with a yawn. “Damn my back hurts, JJ took up most of the couch.” she grumbled. 

“Okay? You kept twitching in your sleep!” JJ countered with a groan. The two girls gather their things. Rossi remained quiet, putting his papers into his satchel and packing up. 

“Alright, we’ll head to the hotel, get a few hours of sleep and get to work first thing in the morning.” Hotch explained as he exited the aircraft, Spencer and I trailing behind. The short ride to the hotel was very quiet, everyone was already half asleep. As we arrived, Hotch spoke sleepily “Okay same as usual, double up, the rooms should have two beds, so Morgan and I, JJ and Emily, Spencer and Y/n.” He handed us our keys and made his way to his room.

JJ stretched and yawned out “Yep, definitely headed straight to bed.” Emily giggled and nodded, the two of them leaving us behind with a ‘goodnight’.

“I’m not tired so I think I’m going to head to the bar for a little bit,” Derek shrugged, picking up his go bag and waving at us as he left the lobby.

“Looks like it’s just you and me Boy Wonder,” I gleamed.

All Spencer responded with was a warm smile and leading the way to our shared room. We didn’t talk the whole walk, it was a comfortable silence. Once we reached the door, Spencer stepped back to let me use my key on the lock. With a content sigh I threw the door open to reveal a single bed and a tiny bathroom. No words were spoken as we settled in, each getting into our pajamas, and doing our nightly routines. He was the first to finish and dive underneath the covers of the squeaky bed without hesitation. We had shared a bed tons of times, but only for me recently, it made me a little nervous.

“Spence, can you maybe scoot over more?” I ask quietly.

“I’m on my half, there's plenty enough room for you still.” The genius spoke into the darkness of the room.

“Oh, okay, I just wanted to make sure we both had space.” I lied, queasy at the fact that I was going to sleep close to my best friend who I was in love with. Walking over and slightly pulling the cover back, I slid into the sheets, careful to avoid Spence.

“If you’re cold, you can come closer, I know how you like to sleep warm.” He suggested, lightly turning to his side for you to cuddle up to him.

Clearing my throat, “N-no, I’m okay. Thanks though, goodnight.”

He stayed hushed for a second, he seemed to be taken back by my response. “Oh...Okay.” He then rolled over, facing his back to me.

As much as I wanted to, I couldn't, especially with my current situation. I didn’t want him to know that I love him, well I did, but I was afraid of what he would think. Does he love me back? Is this all just in my head? What should I do- and just like that, my rambling had put me to sleep.

The next morning I awoke to a light breath fanning across my face. Confused, I open my eyes to reveal a sleeping Spencer, pulling me tight against his chest, with my head in the crook of his neck. It was nice and serene. But it came to an end when I finally realized that I was cuddling him. I got up as quickly and as quietly as possible, careful not to wake the doctor. I rushed to the bathroom to get dressed and get the hell out of there.

But as soon as I attempted a run for the door, “Y/n? What time is it? Are we late?” Reid asks groggily.

“Nope! I just promised the girls I’d meet them downstairs for coffee!” I mislead, hurrying out the door and towards JJ and Emily’s room. Banging on the door I pleaded, “Please tell me you’re awake! I need you to open the door!”

The door swung open, “Woah woah! Slow down? What happened?!” Em questioned as you stepped inside to see that both her and JJ were up and ready.

“I don’t want to talk about it, can we just go get coffee or breakfast? Please?” I panicked.

The girls exchanged a look but nodded and followed me down to the small cafe the hotel had.

The walk down was quick, no one spoke. That was until we sat at a small table after ordering our coffees.

“So, you want to tell us what that was about?” JJ raises an eyebrow at me.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I forced a smile.

“Oh you mean the fact that she’s in love with a pretty boy and has been trying to avoid her feelings?” Emily questions, knowingly, causing me to choke on my coffee.

Trying to dab the spilled coffee off my blouse I ask, “How do you know that?! I mean- what?”

The two girls giggle at me. “Just a hunch,” the brunette quirks. “Relax, it’s obvious he feels the same. He’s absolutely crass about you. Someone can barely say your name and the boy blushes.”

JJ nods in agreement as she sips her mocha. “You can’t avoid it forever Y/n, what's the worst that can happen?”

“Yea, I guess you’re right, I just don’t want things to change between us.” I explain.

“The only reason why they have right now, is because you’ve been making it weird! Stop that!” Emily states while waving her hand in the air to make her point stick.

“Okay okay. I’ll stop.” I lauroll my eyes with amusement. “But today, I have to focus on going undercover. Especially behind Spencer’s back for the most part.” I spoke, furrowing my eyebrows in worry.

“Y/n, it will be okay. All you have to do is dress up, walk a few street corners, and we’ll get the unsub. It’ll be done and over with and Spencer would have nothing to worry about. You’re a strong woman who can fend for herself.” JJ told me, in hopes to alleviate my stress.

I nodded, trying to ignore the growing pit of nervousness in my stomach.

“Hey pretty ladies, nice to know you didn’t give us the option of coffee and gossip this morning.” Derek claims as he makes his way to the table with Hotch and Spencer following shortly behind him.

Spencer caught my eye. He seems pissed off, a mean look splayed across his face. “Y/n, we need to talk.”

In shock I look at the faces which surrounded me at the table, “Um yea, let’s go out into the lobby.”

Spencer quickly left me behind as I timidly arose from my seat and chased him.

“When were you going to tell me?!” He forcefully asked.

“Tell you what?” I attempted to answer.

“That you were going undercover! That you were going to put yourself in harm's way?!” He slightly shouted.

This angered me, “I didn’t realize that I had to run my OWN decisions by YOU! Last time I checked, I was a grown woman. This is for the better, to stop this murderer! You are NOT my father, you are NOT my owner, and last time i checked, you are NOT my boyfriend!” I exclaimed back.

Spencer seemed taken back, his face showed shock and dismay. He was speechless, a hint of sadness in his eyes.

“What? NOW you don’t say something? Unbelievable Spencer.” I exaggerate, turning on my heel and leaving him to himself in the hotel lobby.

To Be Continued...

[imagineaworlds]

I Love You (Part Forty-Three) -- Aaron Hotchner

Written By: @desperately-bisexual

Request: None.

Warnings: Cursing. Kidnapping, death, torture, panic attack, PTSD-- everything Criminal Minds.

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Greenaway!Reader

Word Count: 20,827

Timeline: Season 6 Episode 17 + 18. Three months after part forty-two.

I was… miserable. I felt like this big bubble that was waddling and bumping into everything, and I was entirely useless when it came to cases. Since the Appalachian Trail case, Hotch and I had decided that I would stay out of the field once I started to show; but now that I was bubble-size pregnant, he told me that it was either I stayed in the office with Garcia or I went home and rested in bed. Those were my only two options. There was no getting on the jet with the team, no wandering to the grocery store on a random Sunday, no escaping to get lunch with someone. Nothing. If I didn’t have food in the office, Anderson had to go get it for me. Poor guy.

But, honestly, I wasn’t even fighting Hotch on it anymore. I knew that I wasn’t going to be any help out in the field considering my feet hurt if I was standing for too long. I couldn’t imagine the next three months—at least. JJ and I were talking one day, and she told me to save my strength, because the cliché nine months was more like ten months, if my doctors knew what they were doing. Ugh. I just wanted this part to be over with. I hated feeling stagnant and useless. I liked going out into the field, working on the profiles, chasing the Unsubs, saving the victims. That was my life. And now I had to put that all aside for about another three months or so. It was worth it, though. Every single day that I was miserable was still worth it because it meant that before we would know it, we would have our baby in our arms. I could live with being bored and sick all the time just for that.

Hotch pitied me somewhat, however, and he really sucked at hiding it. He knew that I wanted a child, and he knew that I was excited—just as he was—but he also knew that I was itching to get back to work. Our deal was for my own benefit, but it was probably going to kill me before anything else. I needed the field. So fucking bad. He knew it, Morgan knew it, Emily knew it— Everyone knew it.

So, Hotch and I decided to host a dinner party one Friday night. He liked cooking sometimes, and he hadn’t gotten the chance to do so in a very long time, so I was fine with the idea of having people over, though it was draining at times. I called Emily to see if she wanted to come over for the dinner with Morgan and Rossi, since they were the only ones available on the team. Spencer was headed to some Russian film showing, JJ was busy with Will and the kids, and Garcia had a date.

But when we invited Emily, she was almost hostile towards us. I mean, she never, ever brushed us off; but even then, this was so cold and offensive. I had never heard her like that before. When we called her, I greeted her warmly, but I was met with an inconsiderate: “Hi.” And that was it! As I explained that we were having a family dinner with our friends, she then said: “I really don’t have time for that shit, Y/N. I’ll see you at work.” And then she hung up on me. I scoffed while turning to Aaron, trying to decide if he had any answers or not. He didn’t.

At dinner, I brought it up to see if anyone else knew anything. There had to be a reason that Emily would snap at me like that, right? Come on, she would have never in a million years done that to me—or anyone else on the team. Even if she were busy, she would have been overwhelmingly kind and apologetic about not being able to come to dinner. Something was off.

“She was probably in the middle of something and just forgot to call back to apologize,” Morgan offered behind a mouthful of steak.

I shook my head. That wasn’t it. She specifically said she didn’t have time for my call and for dinner— or really any distraction. There was no hint to her calling back later. There was something else that we were missing, and if we didn’t figure it out soon, I was genuinely going to confront her about it. The thing with Emily Prentiss, however, was that she enjoyed her secrets, and she enjoyed playing her cards close to her chest. Prying hardly ever worked with her, but maybe if I tried just this one, and if it was really all that bad, she’d confide in me. I mean, back after New York when I was upset about JJ and Morgan doubting me and Hotch, Emily was the only person I could confide in, too. Maybe this one time I could be that for her.

“She has her bad days, too, Y/N; you can’t take it personally,” Rossi said.

But I was taking it personally. They hadn’t heard her voice, the way it was gruff, demanding, and angry. Yeah, it sounded like her mind was elsewhere, but that gave her no right to talk to me, her friend, like that. We weren’t the closest. I would be the first to admit that Emily Prentiss and I weren’t exactly sisters forever, but I still loved her dearly, and she loved me equally. We looked after each other. And ever since Hawai’i, when the team found out that I was pregnant, she was over the moon excited to meet my child. She couldn’t stop talking about it. All this time, I thought that Morgan and Garcia were going to be the aunt and uncle who would spoil them a ridiculous amount, but now I was starting to worry that it was actually going to be Emily doing all of the spoiling. That was concerning. But I still loved it. I loved that she was as excited as Hotch, Morgan, and I were. I was excited that I would get to see her, my friend, holding my baby.

“Give it a few days, baby,” Hotch said before downing a spoonful of mashed potatoes. “If she hasn’t cheered up by then, you could talk to her—or, if you want, I’ll talk to her, and make it seem like it’s in an official capacity so that she doesn’t feel attacked.”

I rolled my eyes. That wasn’t going to solve anything. She wasn’t snapping at Hotch, she was snapping at me. The more we discussed it, the more upset I got. I eventually pushed my plateful of food away from me and set my hands over my stomach as I reclined back. The boys didn’t notice how I had fallen silent as they finished up their meals, then Rossi offered to clean up the dishes while Hotch and Morgan worked together to plate up the brownies Hotch made that afternoon with some ice cream. Then, throughout dessert, they talked about sports. I shook my head and took my leave early to go lay down before it got too late.

----

In the morning, mine and Hotch’s alarms went off simultaneously. I groaned and rolled over to turn it off. As I struggled to push myself upright, I saw that Hotch was already awake and dressed, taking a few steps back over to his bedside table in order to turn off his alarm. Somewhat forgetting about what happened yesterday, I smiled at him. He smiled back shortly.

As I slid out from under the covers, Hotch hurried over to hold his arms out to make sure I wouldn’t fall over or hurt myself or something. I laughed at him while playfully shooing his hands away, then leaning up and in to kiss him delicately. He kissed me back until we couldn’t breathe.

“Good morning, Agent Hotchner,” I whispered against his lips.

He tangled his fingers in my already messy hair. “Good morning, Agent Hotchner.” He kissed my jawline until I threw my head back to give him clearer access to my neck. It wasn’t a sexual act. I mean, normally it was, and it had a tendency to get us both riled up; but the way he was only barely leaving kissed against me compared to nibbling until he left a noticeable hickey was enough to just let me relax and fall in love with him again and again. “Are you feeling any better?”

“Kinda.”

“Good…” He ran his hands over my arms until my shoulders relaxed, then he hugged me so that he could rub my back until my spine relaxed, and then he lastly trailed back to my stomach until my whole body felt at ease, and the only thought I had was about how much I loved him. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

After another minute or so, Hotch pulled away from me entirely so that he could kiss my lips one more time before heading back into the bathroom to gel back his hair. Feeling practically rejuvenated for the day, I wandered—or more like waddled—my way to our closet so that I could pick out my clothes. A whole new wardrobe was laid out in front of me. Some clothes, like the sweatshirt Elle bought for me years ago, were already so oversized that I could still fit into them. Everything else, however, had to be packed away in boxes for the time being in order to make room for my maternity clothes. I sighed. I missed my old work clothes. I missed hiding in Hotch’s college shirts. I missed debating what outfit looked professional enough for the office, but was also logistically smart if we had to go into the field with a snap of our fingers. Now, it was just a matter of what was comfortable.

Since Hotch pulled me out of the field a few months ago, the Bureau had officially benched me, too, because I was too much of a liability to be out and about, working on cases. I just wasn’t physically fit to go out chasing bad guys. So, six months pregnant me had to stay behind with Penelope Garcia in her lair of all things Smart. If I showed up in her office with even a single hint of black, she kicked me out until I went to go find something with color on it. She hated blandness. She hated that I liked blandness—especially right now since I just couldn’t fucking fit into anything else. But she was adamant about keeping her office a bright and lively place, so there was one weekend where she dragged me out to the mall to help me find more “Penelope-looking clothes”. However, the purpose of that day spiraled fairly fast. I had gone there for some clothes, meanwhile Garcia had gotten sidetracked and started buying every toy imaginable for the baby.

While I squinted a judgement at her in the checkout line, she got all defensive and said, “You and Hotch are just going to be too busy once my godchild pops out, you won’t have any time to go looking for toys. So, really, I’m doing you all a favor.”

No one had told her that we hadn’t decided on godparents yet. Honestly, I just didn’t know how, and I think Hotch was genuinely terrified of breaking that news to her. So, we decided to keep it on the downlow.

I grabbed the first thing I found in my closet, brought it back out to the bedroom, threw it on the bed, then started changing. Hotch came out of the bathroom to grab his gun from the safe in his bedside table. We had been working on baby proofing the house over the past couple of days. I mean, we always had safes in our drawers for our guns because we still had Jack, a six year old kid, running around. But now we had an extra lock on our bedroom door, we had those stupid plastic gates everywhere to make sure that the baby couldn’t go falling down the steps or something once they started crawling, and we put shitty child locks on the drawers. I really fucking hated it. It felt like we were turning our house into a baby prison. But Hotch insisted that it was the best thing to do, and it was inevitably going to keep the baby safe, so what did I know. At this point, my job was just to sit back and relax while Hotch panicked about everything because I simply did not have the time and energy to be as worried as he was. If it were up to me, I would have just put the crib in our room and called it a day. At least, until they were old enough to move into the nursery.

Still, I didn’t think all of these extra precautions were necessary when the plan was that I would be staying at home for at least three months after the baby was born—way longer than JJ stayed out of the office. Once I was back at work, Jessica offered to spend more time around the house since her job allowed her to do so; but we didn’t think that was necessarily fair to dump on her, so we were debating on whether or not to get a nanny. But that was so far in the future. The point was, our child was going to be watched like a hawk at all times. There wouldn’t be a single chance for anything bad to happen. However, I understood that Hotch was just trying to do what he did best, and that was protecting us. If he felt it was necessary—or even if it just put his mind at ease in a placebo-effect kind of way, I was willing to let him turn our house into a baby prison for the next few years.

Oh, gosh… The next few years…

“Baby,” Hotch spoke louder, like he had been trying to catch my attention before. I snapped out of my train of thought to look at him. “You okay?” he asked, furrowing his brows. I nodded. “You sure?”

“Yeah. I was just lost in thought.”

I moved faster to get dressed. When I was done, I grabbed my gun from my drawer, too, holstering it on my hip, then I went to the bathroom to do my hair, wash my face, and brush my teeth. By the time I was gone, Hotch had woken Jack up and gotten him half-way ready for school. All Jack did these days was wake up, change into new clothes—which Hotch practically had to force him to do—and, if we were lucky, he would brush his hair. The rest of it was just shrugging off our questions. I was starting to worry that it was him acting out because we were a little focused on the baby, when Jack was normally used to getting all of our attention. We knew that this was possible. Older kids who could comprehend that they weren’t going to be an only child now had a tendency to act out like this because they felt like their parents were neglecting them. But I would never do that to Jack. I was trying my damn hardest to spend time with him and make sure he knew that he was still loved and that having a baby brother or sister wasn’t going to change that. He didn’t seem to believe me, though.

“Hey, bud, come on—” Hotch pleaded down the hall. He groaned in annoyance. “Jack. Please. Work with me here.” I heard him slap his hands against his sides like he had thrown his arms up in surrender, then was choosing to walk away from the conversation while worked up and frustrated. I snuck into the hall to see Hotch storming out of Jack’s room. He looked at me as he headed for the stairs. “You can try.” He started stomping downstairs.

I cocked a brow and slowly tiptoed down to Jack’s room, peeking in to see him dressed, but he was cuddled up with Red, our favorite toy dinosaur, on his bed. He was turned towards the wall so that I couldn’t see his face, but I could still tell by his body language that he was sad… He was trying to make it seem like he was mad about something, but he was just… sad…

“Jack?” I cooed, stepping into his room.

“Go away.”

I stopped. “Do you really want me to?”

Sincerely, if he wanted me to go away, I would have. I knew that this was all hard for him, and I knew that letting him feel his emotions was valid—and teaching him that was important. I wouldn’t always leave him alone like that, but sometimes it was better not to pry. If I were really the problem, and if he really wanted me to leave, it would have done more harm than good if I had stayed.

“No,” he whispered regretfully.

I continued approaching him, making my way to the bed until I was sitting on the edge. “What’s going on, little man?”

“Nothing.”

“That’s not true. What happened with Dad?”

“I told him that I didn’t want to go to school, and he got mad.”

“Why don’t you want to go to school?” I asked. Jack didn’t respond. “Huh?” I egged him on while brushing his hair back with my fingers. “Do you want a hug first?”

He nodded, and within an instant, he spun around and sat up, catching my neck in a tight embrace. I wrapped my arms around his torso and held him close. “I just don’t want to go today,” he cried into my shoulder. “Just one day.” He squeezed me tighter until his little arms were straining. “Why did he have to get mad?”

“Because he just wants what’s best for you, bud. He knows that school is good for you. All your friends, your teachers you love, art class, which you love, too. Don’t you want to see Mr. Feechi and show him your cool, new drawing?”

Jack nodded against me.

“Yeah. See? He knows you love it. So, I think he just got confused as to why you don’t want to go. I’m confused why you don’t want to go. Sometimes it’s just hard for him to sit down and talk with people when he gets stressed about a whole bunch of things at once.” I petted his hair and kissed his cheek. “But he still loves you. And I’m sorry he yelled at you. I’ll talk to him about it. But do you want to talk to me about school? About what’s really bothering you?”

“I don’t know… I don’t know why…”

“That’s okay. But it’s not a good enough reason to not go to school.” It was valid if he was sick, or if he needed a mental health day, even. But not going just because he didn’t want to, and not going because he didn’t know why… That wasn’t enough to keep him at home, which would keep me at home, too. “I’m sorry, little man.”

He sniffled and pulled away from me. “Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

“You’ll always love me, right?”

I pouted and let out a choked sob as I tried to smile and stay positive for him. How could he ask me something like that? There was nothing he could ever say or do that would make me stop loving him, and there was no way Hotch would ever let me stop loving him in the first place. I loved Jack like he was my own. No. He was my own. He was my son, and he always would be. For the last three years, I got the gift of watching him grow, and his birth parents were kind enough to let me help raise him, too. I’d be forever grateful for that. Since I met Jack all those years ago, he had been my little man. No matter how big he got, he would always be my little man, and that was just a fact and a part of loving him as fervently as I did. He was my son… He was one of the loves of my life.

“Jack,” I brushed his hair back, “I will never, ever stop loving you.” I poked Red’s side. “You and Red are the brightest parts of my day. Whenever I’m scared while off working with Dad, I think about you and Red, and I think about how much I love you, and I know that I’ll be okay. If I ever stopped loving you, I wouldn’t feel okay and safe anymore.”

He moved to hug me again, this time with enough force that sent me back somewhat, making me giggle while catching him. “I love you, too,” he whispered.

After staying like that for a few moments longer, I patted his side and lifted him up onto his feet on the floor so that he could grab his things for school before making our way downstairs. Jack scurried over to his desk without a word. He started shoving everything he needed into the biggest pocket, not at all concerned with organization. How he was mine and Hotch’s kid, I’d never understand. But it certainly brought a smile to my face.

Once we dropped Jack off at school, I fiddled with my fingers as we pulled out of the parking lot in order to head to work. I was beginning to wonder if I made a mistake sending him to school today. Maybe he really just needed the one day. No. One day would turn into two days, and then three, and so on. I couldn’t do that. It wouldn’t’ve been fair to him or me.

“You can’t yell at him like that, Aaron,” I said. He nodded. “You’re going to have to apologize to him tonight.” He nodded again.

Funnily enough, he was never this quiet around me. Usually, Hotch was a very reserved person who didn’t like talking to people unless he had to—and he definitely never opened up to anyone. But I was the exception. He could always talk to me, and he always made sure to be open with me. Therefore, I knew something was off.

I grabbed his right hand from the steering wheel, brought it to my lips, and gently kissed his knuckles. “Baby…” He hummed a questioning tone back to me in response. “What’s going on?”

He sighed as the car slowed at a red light. “I’m worried about Emily, too. I just didn’t know how to tell anyone because it’s my job to worry about you guys, and it’s my responsibility to keep things professional and not pry too far into people’s—”

“Hotch,” I stopped him before he could keep rambling, “it’s okay to be worried about your friend. I’ll talk to her today to figure this all out once and for all.” I kissed his knuckles again. “She’s probably okay.” I turned his hand over and kissed his palm. “I love you.”

He curled his fingers until he was holding my chin. He squeezed as we both smiled. “I love you, too.”

“I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you.”

“You’re silly sometimes,” he teased.

“Only for you, my love.” I kissed his palm roughly before releasing him and turning back to watch the world pass by as we kept driving.

----

When we arrived on the sixth floor of the Quantico building, I meandered over to my desk in the bullpen, slumping and sighing as I did so. There was a picture of Jack sitting prominently on my desk, one that I had kept there since I moved in with him and Aaron a couple years ago, and I updated the photo every so often whenever it would become outdated. Jack was growing so fast. A few months ago, even, he would have never asked me a question like he brought forward that morning. He used to know that I would love him endlessly and unconditionally. Where did I go wrong? This had to be about the baby, right? I mean, he was probably getting worried that Hotch and I might love him less or something like that because we were going to have a baby—and maybe he was old enough now to assume that I would just love our baby more because they would be my own flesh and blood. But that wasn’t true.

Morgan cocked a brow at me from his desk. “Peanut, you okay?”

I nodded and leaned forward to put my computer passcode in. As the system started up, I saw the picture of me, Jack, Hotch, and Jessica together at the park the day Hotch proposed to me. The night before, we promised Jack that we would go on a bike ride together. So, after Hotch proposed to me just after we woke up, and… other things happened… we got up, showered, called Jessica to ask if she wanted to come with us, and the four of us made our way to the park where we biked around for about an hour or so before Jack decided he wanted to play soccer with Hotch. Around lunch time, as Hotch fell onto his back on the grass, and Jack landed on top of him, both of them laughing, I told Jessica what happened. She immediately brightened. She got all giddy and said, “Finally!” before throwing her arms around me. Then, she insisted that we take a family photo. She waved down a random jogger and practically shoved her phone into his hands while she called for Hotch and Jack to come over. We posed, but it was still chaotic. Jack was jumping on his dad for a piggyback ride, and I was trying my best to make sure that neither of them got hurt in the process. It was cute. We were all smiling—laughing, in fact—and it was absolutely genuine. There was nothing forced about the love we all shared for each other. There was nothing fake. I didn’t hate Jack. That photo was a reminder to myself that no matter what he thought of me, or no matter how much he could grow to hate me for one reason or another, I would never stop loving him. As I promised.

“What’s wrong?” Morgan continued to pry.

“Nothing.”

“Mhm. Sure. Try again.”

I rolled my eyes at him since I knew that this meant that he wasn’t going to let it go now. “Jack was having a bad morning, and he asked me if I’ll always love him. It’s just thrown my whole day off balance.”

“I’m about to make it even worse,” JJ said while passing our desks with a stack of case files in her arms.

The entire bullpen—excluding Emily, who seemed to be running late—groaned as we pushed ourselves to our feet and started meandering over to the roundtable room. After last night, I was expecting to talk to Emily before this would happen. I wanted… I wanted to just sort out if I was the problem or not. If I was, I wanted to know how I could mend things between us; and if it wasn’t about me, then what was it about, and how could I help? But, no. She wasn’t there, which was also incredibly unlike her. All of us happened to be late at one point or another. It was inevitable. However, there wasn’t a single day where Emily Prentiss showed up late or called in sick. No matter what was going on in her life, she was always there. Always. So, I was starting to grow even more concerned about her, which I’m sure everyone noticed as we sat down, because I could feel the color draining from my face as I took the seat facing both doors and the windows, just so that I could see her whenever she would come in.

In the meantime, JJ started circling the table while handing out the case files to each of us. When she arrived in front of the monitor once more, she began explaining the case as we knew all of the details to be, while simultaneously clicking the remote in her hand to show the slideshow that had photos from the crime scene—or, in this case, crime scenes.

Late last night, while everyone in D.C. was asleep, two homes were set on fire, killing the families inside. The only connection was the time. The fires took place within the same hour, but that was all. The homes were nowhere near each other—in fact, they were on complete opposite sides of the city. The oddest part, as Morgan noted, was that no one was reporting on this story, which was concerning considering the news ate up and spit out family tragedies like these all the time as if it were fun for them. Two identical fires in one night should have been like chumming the water for them. But nope. That was what caught JJ’s attention in the first place.

First, a couple and their son were found dead in the master bedroom of their home, all three shot through the forehead by the gun that happened to belong to the father. But, then, how did the fire start? Why did the fire start? If it was a murder/suicide, the odds that a house fire would catch shortly after was, at the very least, odd.

Then, the second couple all the way across town, were found dead in their living room after the house exploded due to a suspected gas leak. Still odd. Gas leaks purposefully smell like rotten eggs. If the family was up and doing something with fire—likely cooking—then how did the gas leak go unnoticed? Why didn’t an alarm go off? The report from the fire department in front of me indicated that there was a burglary, fire, and gas alarm in the house. They would have been notified before they could even smell the rotten eggs.

“What are the connections?” I inquired after falling short of noticing one in the files.

JJ shrugged. “There’s only one, and it’s… Well, it’s loose.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means that the only connection between the families comes from the mothers—”

Just then, Emily came running into the boardroom in a rush. Her head was down, but I could see how frazzled she was. She started setting her things down frantically before pausing when she noticed how we were all watching her. “Sorry I’m late,” she apologized while taking her seat.

“Are you okay?” Hotch interrogated.

She shrugged, entirely disregarding his worry. “Yeah. JJ, as you were.”

What the fuck? That wasn’t like her at all. First, she didn’t tease us as she came into the room; then, when asked if everything was alright considering she was late for the first time since joining the team; and then she was formal with JJ. What happened to the Emily Prentiss who cuddled with Jennifer Jareau on the bed at my bachelorette party? What happened to the Emily Prentiss who would try to hide what was really going on with her by teasing me or Morgan—or even Spencer, someone she saw as her little brother. It was all so strange. Her behavior was only making me worry more, and now I could see it on Hotch, Morgan, and Rossi’s faces. Hotch clasped our hands together under the table. That was how bad it was. We had never, ever touched during a roundtable meeting.

“Um…” JJ hesitated, eyeing Emily carefully just like the rest of us. “We were discussing the two crime scenes—”

“I’ll get caught up later. Just keep going.”

JJ scoffed. “Okay.” She rolled her eyes and turned back to the screen. “The only connection comes from the mothers, both of whom were born and raised in Europe.”

“That’s the only connection?” Hotch questioned warily. “That’s not much.”

“It’s all there is.”

Hotch sighed. “Okay… Rossi and Reid, you’ll take the first house. Morgan and Prentiss, head to the second. The rest of us will stay here and start looking through the files again and the families’ histories to see if we can find any other connection. There has to be something.” He released my hand, picked up his things from the table, stood, then quickly and quietly left the room.

Everyone started following his lead. Garcia and JJ immediately scurried off to Garcia’s office. Rossi and Reid turned for the back door that led to the ramp next to the break room, while Morgan and Emily moved for the front door that led to the bullpen. Before she could escape, however, I stepped just in front of her path, and threw my hands up in surrender so that she couldn’t get mad at me. She sighed and rolled her eyes. Wow. Was I really that bad? Whatever it was that was clearly going on in her life, was it really so bad that she had to take it out on me, the one person who had enough love for her to straight up confront her about what was going on instead of hiding like Hotch and Rossi were in their offices.

“Em, what’s going on with you?” I questioned sincerely. She didn’t say or do anything. “Can we talk somewhere privately?”

“I’m busy. Maybe later.” She pushed past me, barely brushing my shoulder like she still had enough decency to not actually harm me.

Fucking ridiculous. This was all so out of character for her, and she wasn’t letting anyone in to help her. Honestly, it was beginning to get on my nerves. Whenever I was in her shoes, something was going wrong in my life and I was bottling it up and taking out my frustrations on everyone else, Emily was the one person who could knock some sense into me. At least, that was what she had done after JJ pissed me off in New York. She looked me in the eye and said, “Screw them, Y/N. You don’t need anyone’s opinion but your own and Hotch’s.” Where was that Emily? That was the very same Prentiss that I knew and loved, and was going to be— No. That thought was for another time.

Garcia and JJ came back in, this time carrying laptops and stacks of files almost as tall as them. I hated desk duty. Absolutely fucking despised it. Hotch knew that I didn’t like being benched, he knew that it was hard for me to just sit around and do nothing while the team was out there getting a good look at the crime scenes and risking their lives. I should have been out there with them. I should have been by Morgan’s side, ready to jump in front of him if I had to; or I should have been with Emily so that I could get a read on what was really wrong with her. Honestly, at that point, I was even willing to go with Rossi and Reid, the two people on the team I hardly worked with. But, no. I had to be holed up all day in the office, and it was draining.

I had to grin and bear it, however, by taking a stack of files for myself and start flipping through all of them. Normally, I would be out there in the field, giving Reid a chance to stay back to read a mile a minute. I wished that were the case still. Between the three of us, it was going to take until at least lunch time to get through all of this information. Reid would have finished all of them on his own in, like, ten minutes— maximum.

Everything about the two families involved with these incidents were just as the cops and JJ described: Ordinary. They were all healthy, fit, and happy. There was no financial stress. No therapy bills or doctors visits outside of yearly physical checkups. Even their schedules were ordinary. Both parents went to work while the children went to school. However, the children went to different schools—one private and one public—and one was succeeding while the other was practically failing.

Their lives were as perfect as could be, which was in fact the one thing that was most suspicious.

“Hold on…” Garcia mumbled under her breath as she started typing on her loud keyboard faster. “Woah, woah, woah.”

“What is it?” I asked.

She pushed her seat back, grabbed her chair, then started speed walking out of the room. JJ and I shared a curious look. After a moment, I decided to chase after her. She was headed straight towards Hotch’s office, but he was actually coming out in order to meet us in the boardroom to see if we had come up with anything.

“So, something happened,” Garcia began as we approached Hotch on the balcony. He kept walking, so we followed. “No one’s talking about this. Still. Except for one guy who I caught attempting to post the article, but then it was pulled almost immediately—not before I could catch it, though.” She sounded so proud of herself.

“What do you want from me, Garcia?” he asked.

“With your permission, sir, I would like to track him down to see why it was that he pulled the article as soon as he posted it. Something’s fishy about all of this. Someone should have reported on this by now. Actually, there should have been a whole media blow up—pardon the pun—by now. I think he might know something about why there’s been complete radio silence on this.”

“Do it.”

“I’ll go to help you question him,” I offered. Garcia was tech savvy and extremely snippy and sassy, but she didn’t know how to profile. She could give us our in with this guy, but I could actually get information out of him. Garcia seemed to agree. She nodded and looked to Hotch hopefully, as did I.

“You can track him down and question him yourself, Garcia,” he said, half paying attention as he unpacked his papers to set them out on the table.

“Hotch—” I tried arguing. “That’s not fair—”

“Here and the house. Remember? That was the deal. It could be just the house, if you’re not careful.”

The whole room fell silent. Tension hung in the air as Hotch and I stared each other down. Just a few months ago, I promised Hotch that when the time would come, I would pull myself out of the field, and I wouldn’t throw a fit about it. I did that. But it wouldn’t hurt to drive down to the local newspaper to ask a journalist a few questions. This was a little too much. The deal was that I could go to the office, as long as I didn’t go into the field. Staying in town wasn’t “going into the field”. He had to budge on this. Right?

“No,” he finally said sternly.

I sighed and sat down, keeping my eyes away from him as everyone cautiously started moving back towards conversing about the case. That was incredibly embarrassing. For years, Hotch and I didn’t show affection at work, we didn’t argue like an old married couple, and we certainly didn’t bring up our deals or agreements in front of everyone. We didn’t discuss the fact that we made rules to not touch in front of people, or say “I love you” when the others were around. We didn’t talk about how we promised to never lie to each other. And we certainly didn’t talk about how we made a deal that I would only stay at the house or at the office. No one knew that. Since that day at the Park Rangers’ office, that had been our secret deal, and I wanted it to fucking stay that way; yet Hotch had the audacity to bring it up in front of the entire team. Not only was I frustrated about the situation he had stuck me in, but I was also frustrated with my husband now.

“I, um,” Morgan cleared his throat uncomfortably. “I think I might have something here.” He handed the file he had been looking through over to Hotch. “Both of the mothers coached their sons’ soccer teams out on the Hill. They probably met that way.”

Reid shuffled from Gideon’s couch in the corner to the table we were all sitting around. “I found another connection, too. It’s in their phone records. Both moms, who happened to be from Europe and coached their sons’ soccer teams on the Hill, as Morgan mentioned, called the same number multiple times.”

“Give it to me,” Garcia said. After Reid read the phone number aloud, Garcia started digging through the identity of whoever it was that owned that number. “Byron Delaney—He’s British.” She stopped typing immediately.

Hotch looked at Morgan. “Go.”

Morgan got up and raced to the bullpen to tell Emily where they were headed and who it was they were visiting. Within the next minute or so, Hotch’s phone started ringing, causing him to sigh under his breath, collect his things again, and leave to take the call out in his office. The rest of us settled in our seats and started looking for a way to contact that reporter Garcia had talked about. I even decided to spend some time reaching out to newspapers as an “anonymous source” looking to give them an inside scoop on the story just to see if anyone would bite. Nothing. Everyone got back to me in the next thirty minutes or so just to tell me that the story wasn’t interesting enough for them to pursue. That was utter bullshit. Something was seriously wrong with this case, and the only one who could give us any answers was the reporter Garcia was hunting down.

“Where are Hotch and Rossi going?” JJ asked, looking through the windows of the roundtable room to see the two of them hauling ass out of the office.

We all shrugged.

Two minutes later, Hotch was calling Garcia to let her know what was going on. “Emily and Morgan were shot at by the Unsubs.”

“What?!” I exclaimed. How could he not tell us that immediately? “Are they alright?”

“They’re fine. They found Byron’s body. Dave and I are headed there now to case the scene with them. We’ll call with what we know later.” He hung up before I could argue with him, which he knew I would.

The worry was starting to fuck with my head and my body. A headache was brewing, meanwhile my stomach was starting to ache to the point I felt like I was going to throw up. At first, I tried ignoring it. I closed my eyes to stop the headache and to focus on my breathing, but that didn’t work. So, I tried rocking back and forth gently. However, it only seemed to get worse the longer we sat there in silence, worrying about Morgan and Emily.

“Fuck…” I cursed under my breath. “Not now, baby… Come on, just give me a few more hours.”

“Y/N?” Reid questioned me from across the table. I glanced up at him through my lashes to see that he was watching me hold my stomach, rocking back and forth lightly, trying to control my breathing. “What is it?”

“The baby’s just kicking. That’s all.”

He narrowed his eyes at me and closed the file in front of him. “You look like you’re in pain.”

I searched his eyes. There was no way in hell he was going to give this up, but if I told him the truth, he would tell Hotch, and then that would just cause more problems than was necessary. “I’m fine.” I saw that Garcia was also eyeing me suspiciously now. “Please, just don’t tell Hotch. I swear, it’s nothing. I’m just not feeling well.”

“We’re supposed to tell Hotch if anything—”

“No. Please.”

Garcia was slowly tapping on her keyboard, trying not to draw my attention. Her sloth-like pace was exactly what caught my eye, though. “Sorry…” she apologized quietly. “I had to.”

I sighed and threw my papers on the table. “I’ll get my things.”

“Why?” Reid asked.

“Hotch’s gonna make me go home.” I stood. “Fuck—” I grabbed onto the table for balance. “Shit…” My stomach ached like I was being stabbed. I let out a shaky breath. “Okay, fine… Someone get Anderson to drive me home.”

Reid stood and raced out of the boardroom to go find Anderson while I slowly made my way down to my desk to get my things. I collected my purse and threw my phone and badge in it. Within the next minute or so, Anderson approached, letting me know that Reid had tracked him down to take me home. I thanked him quickly. The stomach aches had passed, but I knew that they would inevitably return. If I was heading home, I wasn’t coming back. At least not today.

On our way out, I beckoned Garcia over quickly to tell her that even though I was going home, I wanted constant updates, and if there were any new developments, I wanted her to video call me with everything. She agreed. While she was practically pushing me towards the elevator, she said that she would put me on calls with the team, send me texts with small details, video call me for dozens of other things. Since I was going home because they let up the game to Hotch, it was the least they could do.

In the car, Anderson played the radio and we talked about his girlfriend. Her name was Angelica. They met shortly after the Fisher King case when he began attending group therapy to help him cope with the guilt he felt for what happened to Elle. I interrupted to tell him that none of it was his fault. While he sent me a short smile and thanked me for the personal reassurance, I could tell that he still wasn’t convinced; but it didn’t matter. Talking about Angelica made his whole face brighten. He was grinning ear to ear, his eyes sparkling in the sun as he focused on the road, and he was tapping his fingers against the steering wheel in time with the beat of the music. I smiled to myself. It was so odd that I had been working with people like him—people in the broader spectrum of the BAU—for years, and yet I hardly knew anything about them. Sometimes I would consider Anderson a friend, but it was just… It was different being friends with him compared to being friends with Morgan and Emily. I knew practically everything about Morgan, and I knew as much as Emily was willing to tell me, but I didn’t know much about Anderson. It felt wrong. Somehow, it irked me that I could be working in the same office as him for so long, and yet I never stopped to ask him how his day was going, or if he was seeing anyone, or if he was okay since everything happened with Elle.

“Do you ever wish you could see her again?” Anderson inquired. I didn’t understand what he was asking. “Elle.”

Oh. I couldn’t tell him that I had seen her somewhat recently, or that I didn’t care if I saw her again or not, as shitty as it sounded. Since she first left, all I wanted was to see her again and get answers from her. Only, when I did see her again, she felt like an entirely different person, and I didn’t get a single real answer out of her. So, no. I didn’t wish that I could ever see her again, but Anderson didn’t need to know that.

“Sometimes,” I answered, then I turned to stare out the window silently.

By the time he dropped me off at my house, my phone was ringing with a FaceTime from Garcia. Anderson was already driving around the corner down the block when I answered while simultaneously digging out my house keys. As I unlocked the door, I saw Penelope’s face on the screen.

“What do you have for me, lovely?” I asked.

“We have a name—a potential suspect,” Garcia said.

“What does that mean?”

“His name’s Ian Doyle, and we think that he might be operating on a list of people who took him down seven years ago.”

“Why?”

“Because all but three of the people on that list are dead.”

I stopped in my tracks as I entered the house. “Who are the other three?”

“We don’t know. The CIA and Interpol are giving Hotch a hard time confirming identities. They only just told us that our victims matched the team of profilers that had taken Doyle down. I don’t know when we’ll get the name of the other three agents.”

“Hotch will get the names. I know he will.” I set my things down and wandered to get a TUMS and Motrin for my stomach and headache. “Call me when you know more.”

“Of course, my love. Get some sleep. You look pale.” She kissed the pads of her index and middle fingers, then pressed them to her camera before hanging up on me.

I set my phone down on the counter so that I could pour out one pill from the TUMS bottle and the Motrin bottle. When I had them resting in my palm, I turned to grab a glass from the cupboard and fill it with water. When I was finished with the Motrin, I carried the water and my phone with me upstairs as I began chewing on the big TUMS pill that was slowly dissolving in my mouth. By the time I landed in bed, the pill was gone, and I was already falling asleep. Just a few minutes. I would wake up soon...

----

As my eyes fluttered open, I could see that the sun was setting over the houses in the neighborhood. I jolted upright and checked the time. Shit. Shit, shit, shit. I slept for three hours. Fuck. I reached to grab my phone to see that there were no calls or texts from anyone on the team. I didn’t understand. I had been MIA for three hours. How had Garcia not checked up on me? How did Hotch not call to see if I was feeling alright? What the fuck was he really going on? I tried calling Hotch, but it went to voicemail. My face fell.

That was when I heard something clatter in the dining room. I jumped in my own skin, the sound echoing throughout the house sending me back to that day when I was taken in Hawai’i. Hotch wasn’t picking up the phone, and now it sounded like someone was in the house. Maybe it was just Hotch? Maybe he picked up Jack from soccer early, and they were downstairs setting up dinner? Yeah. Maybe. I could only know for sure by making my way downstairs slowly, holding onto the railing to make sure I didn’t lose my footing. My heat was still hurting, but the baby had calmed down, so my stomach wasn’t aching and cramping anymore. Thankfully.

I stumbled to a halt when I saw Jessica and Jack sitting at the dining room table, eating spaghetti and garlic bread. She had a glass of water and wine, meanwhile Jack was chugging down a large glass of chocolate milk that he ended up refilling with the jug next to him once he was out. I smiled. Chocolate milk was his “thing” right now. For the longest time, it was mac and cheese—and, of course, he would never pass up the chance to have a bowl of it, but it was “chocolate milk this” and “chocolate milk that” nowadays. Eventually, Hotch and I were going to have to trick him out of it. If it became an unhealthy obsession, I’d find one way or another to get him to start drinking iced tea or something like his dad.

Jessica looked up to see me standing in the doorway. “Hey! You’re up.” I smiled and nodded. “Did you sleep well?”

“Yeah…” I searched the table with my eyes, trying to piece together how long she had been with Jack. “How did you…” I chuckled to myself.

“Aaron called to tell me you weren’t feeling well, so I came over to watch Jack.” She picked up her glass of wine. “I would’ve warned you, but I saw that you were sleeping and I didn’t want to wake you.”

“It’s all good.” I walked over to the table before kissing the top of Jack’s head. “How was school, little man?”

“Boring,” he answered behind a full mouth of spaghetti noodles.

At least it wasn’t bad, and at least he wasn’t sending any signal that he didn’t want to go back tomorrow. If he would have still been as upset as he was that morning, I would have considered letting him stay home tomorrow. Tomorrow… I realized that I didn’t even know where I would be tomorrow given the fact that I had already missed so much of the case. I was feeling a thousand times better already, but Hotch probably wasn’t going to accept that, and I really wasn’t looking to pick a fight with him about it again, and I wasn’t willing to hear Morgan, Rossi, or Emily take his side on the matter.

“Did you show Mr. Feechi your art?”

“I forgot.”

I chuckled and kissed the top of his head again. Forgetting to show his art to his teacher probably meant that he was caught up in a million other things like schoolwork or friends, and either option was ideal to me, so I was content with that answer, truth be told. At least he looked and sounded better now. Compared to this morning, he was acting like my little man again as I knew him, the slurping spaghetti noodles really bringing the whole thing together. I smiled to myself.

“I’m gonna check in with the team,” I said to Jessica. “I’ll be back in a bit.”

She shrugged and nodded understandingly. “Take your time.”

As I headed back upstairs to the bedroom, I sighed and wiped my palms over my face in an attempt to wake myself up. I hadn’t meant to fall asleep earlier. Considering I gave Garcia so much shit earlier for snitching on me, and I begged her to stay in touch because of it, the least I could have done was stay awake in order to receive her calls. Then again, I was feeling much better now that I was well rested. Give and take, I suppose.

I grabbed my phone from my bedside table and dialed Garcia’s number. The call rang a worrisome amount of times before going to voicemail. That was unusual… I cocked a brow at my phone as I dialed Hotch’s number this time around. Garcia normally picked up because she was sitting at her desk—or at least she had one of her many phones on her to alert her that someone was calling. Why hadn’t she answered?

And then I heard Hotch pick up. I let out a relieved sigh and let my palm rest over my stomach. “Hey,” I said.

“Hey,” he responded, sounding a little out of breath and extremely preoccupied.

“Is everything okay? Garcia didn’t—”

“We’re fine, baby. We’re just about to give the profile, so we’re all running around right now. Can I call you back later when we’re done?”

I hesitated. “Yeah…” I looked over my shoulder to glance at his side of the bed which was uncomfortably empty. “Are you coming home tonight?”

“Probably not.”

“Oh…”

Hotch stopped and sighed heavily. “I’m so sorry, baby. I know that this isn’t what you want. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. Just be safe. Call me after the profile and catch me up.”

“I will. I love you, Y/N.”

I smiled against my phone. “I love you, too.”

He hung up on me before anything else could be said.

----

Jack tried staying up with me as long as he could. After Jessica had left for the night, the two of us crashed on the couch to watch a movie, but he ended up spending more time focusing on my stomach than anything else. He found it fascinating. I mean, he was a kid, so he didn’t necessarily understand what was happening, but he knew that his baby brother or sister was in there. When I told him that the baby was kicking, Jack started freaking out. He thought I was dying. I laughed at him and told him that it was alright while placing his hand over my stomach so that he could feel it. “Ew,” was his response as he snatched his hand away. I chuckled again and explained that it was natural. “I still hate it,” he said, scurrying to the other side of the couch. At least his fascination with poking my stomach was gone now.

By the time the movie reached the credits, Jack was asleep and snoring. We had been waiting to see if Hotch would show up or call, but there was no word. So, I leaned over, and I combed Jack’s hair with my fingers while kissing his temple until he slowly stirred awake. I whispered that it was time to go to bed. Since I couldn’t carry him, tired, little Jack had to roll off the couch, then lazily stomp across the house in front of me as we ever so slowly made our way upstairs one step at a time. Jack crashed onto his bed and fell back to sleep immediately.

I smiled and leaned down to kiss his forehead. “Night, my little man.”

“Night…” he whispered, then rolled over to face the wall.

As I left his room, I closed the door quietly behind me to make sure that there weren’t any creaks, and that the sound of the doorknob wouldn’t wake him up. When the coast was clear, I let out a deep breath. That was when my phone started ringing. I jumped slightly at the sudden noise that shook the house, and probably woke Jack up.

I cursed under my breath while hurrying down to mine and Hotch’s room while answering the phone. The call was from Hotch. Finally. “Hey, babe.”

“Hey,” he responded with a hint of worry.

I froze and cocked a brow. What was wrong? Something was definitely fucking wrong, and he couldn’t lie his way out of it in order to make sure I wouldn’t come back in. Whatever it was, if it was bad enough, I would go back in. So, help me, if he wasn’t okay, I was going to race there, honking the horn at every goddamn car in my way.

“What is it?”

“Have you seen Emily?”

“No. Why?”

“It’s nothing,” he insisted quickly. “I’ll call you back—”

“No. Aaron Christopher Hotchner, you tell me what’s going on right fucking now, or so help me.”

He sighed heavily. He was still reluctant to admit whatever it was, but I wasn’t going to back down. He promised that he would call after the profile, yet he didn’t, and now he was calling to ask if I knew where Emily was, which meant that the team didn’t, which meant that something horrible— “She’s the last person on Ian Doyle’s list.”

“What? And you let her out of your sight? Aaron!”

“It wasn’t our fault. We didn’t know, Y/N. We think she ran in order to protect all of us, because she thinks she can handle this on her own.”

“Of course she does. She’s always been like that. She’s been acting so fucking weird, Hotch,” I said, hiding my face in my hand, “we should’ve talked to her sooner. Fuck…”

“Y/N, please, if you start panicking, it could be bad for the baby—”

“I’m coming back in.” I knew that argument was going to come about. I knew the second I heard his voice that something was bad enough that he needed to call me, and if it got to that point, I should just come in.

Hotch sounded angry when saying, “No.”

“Emily’s our family. I’m coming in to help find her. And Doyle.”

“Y/N, no.”

“Yes. I’m already on my way, Hotch. I’ll be okay. I’ll bring medication, a go-bag, and I’ll sleep on the couch in your office if I need more rest. But I’m not abandoning Emily. She’s our family.”

“That’s exactly why she left in the first place. Y/N, she left a gift in the drawer of her desk with her phone and badge. It’s addressed to you.”

I stopped in my tracks. “What?”

“There’s a letter attached to it, too.”

“What does it say?”

“I haven’t opened either of them.”

“Open them,” I demanded. “They might be something important!”

“I need to have the bomb squad check it first,” he answered quietly, and almost regretfully. I cocked a brow. What the fuck did that mean? “Doyle’s getting desperate. It could be part of his plan. If I open it now, it might—”

“Okay. Fine. Just… I’ll do it when I get there…” I grabbed a go-bag from the closet and started shoving clothes, medication, toiletries, etc. in there without a single care in the world. “We have to bring her back, Aaron,” I whispered almost helplessly, almost as if the message wasn’t really for him but for me and my conscience. “We have to.”

“I know.” He sounded just as helpless as I was.

I stayed on the phone with him the entire time as I texted Jessica to let her know what was happening, and then I got in my car that was parked in the garage in case we ever needed it for situations like this. My hands were shaking against the wheel as I drove. How could Emily do this? How could she just run instead of staying with us and trusting that we could help her? I didn’t understand how she could possibly think that she was better off on her own than with her family. I didn’t understand why she felt like she couldn’t come to me. Ian Doyle was why she had been pushing me away. All this time, she knew that he was coming after her, and instead of utilizing us, she abandoned us. As angry as I wanted to be, I was just anxious. I was worried sick. If I hadn’t been concerned earlier about Morgan and Emily, I didn’t know what to call this. I hadn’t felt this way since Hotch was all alone as he went to go face off against Foyet and I had to count the seconds until we could get there to give him back up.

When I got to the office, Hotch was waiting at the front door for me, the phone pressed to his ear because he stayed on the call with me all the way until I was standing just in front of him. I crashed my face into his chest. I didn’t care that we had our rules about being intimate at work, or that Cody, the Director, was walking past us as I did so. I didn’t care. The only thing that could calm me down again was being in my husband’s arms, feeling the way his abs under his shirt flexed against my torso, and how his long arms could hold me close while his hot breath floated over the top of my head.

“I still haven’t opened them,” he whispered to me, “but the bomb squad cleared them, and a tox report on the envelope came back negative.

I took his hand in mine, letting him take my go-bag in his other hand so that I wouldn’t have to carry it. We walked together inside. Security was different at night. We usually knew the team working the front desk during the day since we would welcome them every morning when we would come in for work, but we hardly ever saw the night team. I mean, if we were still at the office at night, that meant that we were there until the sun came up, just as the morning security team was coming in. But not this time around. Everything felt so foreign with Emily gone in the wind, and the different, unwelcoming faces at the front desk and standing at the metal detectors didn’t help.

When we made it up to the sixth floor, I could see the team standing up in the roundtable room, working together to tape photos and maps up on the walls to organize all of their evidence and get a new perspective on everything. Hotch led me the opposite direction, though. He led me straight to his office where he dropped my go-bag on the couch, then walked over to his desk where the box and letter were sitting, just as he promised. He didn’t touch them. He just turned to face me while gesturing towards them.

“Do you want me to stay?” he inquired. I shook my head. If it was addressed to me, I wanted to see it all for myself first, and then I would take it to the team if need be. “Okay.” As he started walking out, he wrapped his right arm around my hips before kissing my cheek lightly. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” I croaked.

He left before anything else could be said or he could change his mind about leaving me alone for this part. His hand drifted off my waist, my fingers trying to tangle with his all the way until he was out of reach. My hand fell to my side. When it was just me in the room, I turned back to the box and the letter. I swallowed hard. I didn’t want to know what was in there. I didn’t want to know what it was that Emily could have possibly left for me now. I didn’t want this to be the last thing I would ever get from her.

I slowly moved to sit down in one of the chairs in front of Hotch’s desk. After staring at the packaging for a moment, I decided to take the box in my hands and start carefully tearing at the wrapping. As the box opened, I saw what it was that she had left for me. A choked back sob escaped me. I smiled as I lifted it out of the box and held it close to my chest. Emily’s favorite animal was a koala. We always joked that if we had left her in charge of putting together the nursery, she would have ended up decorating the whole place with koalas. Never in a million years, however, did I anticipate that she would do this.

I squeezed the stuffed animal koala bear against my chest as tight as I could, as if I were giving it a Superman hug. After everything, the last thing she wanted to do—the last thing she wanted to give us before leaving—was a goddamn stuffed koala bear. I was going to give her so much shit when I would see her again. She could have given us anything. Scotch for Hotch, cigars for Rossi, a book for Reid, something with butterflies for JJ, something small and adorable for Penelope’s desk; but, nope. She chose to leave this for me. Why?

I leaned forward to grab the letter and pull it out of the envelope. It was her handwriting, alright. Ian Doyle couldn’t have forged anything like it, that was for sure, though Reid would probably still want to verify it himself at some point.

“Y/N, if you’re reading this, then you know by now that I’ve left. You know that I had to run in order to protect all of you. You also know that I would never do this unless I thought it was absolutely crucial. Doyle is coming after me. He’s been threatening the team and your family for three months, and I couldn’t tell you because he was going to kill you, and I just can’t let anyone die because of me. I can’t let you lose your family because of me. I know that there’s a chance that I won’t make it… That Doyle will win, and I’ll never get a chance to meet your son or daughter. If that’s the case, then I want them to have this and to know that it came from me. I want them to know that I love them, even if I didn’t get to hold them in my arms. I want them to know that I left in order to save them, and to save their family because they deserve to grow up with a mom, a dad, a brother, and a group of aunts and uncles that love them more than anything. I want you to know that I love you. Joining this team was the greatest gift of my life, but getting to know you and work with you in the field every day is my greatest blessing. You’ve come so far. You’ve grown, learned, suffered, and succeeded. I don’t know anyone like you, and I doubt that I’ll ever meet anyone else like you. You’re special, Y/N. Your son or daughter is going to be special, too; I just know it. More than anything in the world, I wish I could be there to tell you that it’s all going to be alright, but I really don’t know if that’s true. I want to meet your child, and I’m so ready to see the amazing person they grow up to be because they have the most amazing parents. Things just don’t turn out how we expect sometimes. Life gets in the way. Love and suffering gets in the way. I know me asking you and the team to not come looking for me is futile, but I hope that you understand that if you do come looking for me, I can’t guarantee everyone’s safety, so for that very reason, I’m going to ask that none of you follow me. This is my battle to fight. On my own. No one else needs to get hurt because of things I did in my past. I love you, Y/N. I love Hotch. I love Jack. I love your baby. I’m sorry. Emily.”

I folded the paper slowly before setting it down on the desk in front of me. Just when my hands were free, I immediately hid my face in my palms as I started to sob. That wasn’t fair of her. She didn’t get to do this to me. She didn’t get to just run away and say goodbye, never giving me the chance to say goodbye, too.

The team was going to want answers.

So, I wiped as many tears away as I could manage while putting the stuffed koala back in the box and hiding it under Hotch’s desk before grabbing the letter then heading out of his office. As the door closed behind me, I let out a shaky breath. Anderson, Gina, and a few secretaries were mulling about in the bullpen, completely unaware of what was happening. The team was going to take it hard; I knew that. But the rest of them in the office were going to have a hard time with it, too. I didn’t want to have to tell any of them. I didn’t want to have to face the truth.

I took one brave step towards the roundtable room, trying my best not to draw attention to myself. And then I took another. Every time I let out a breath and moved one step closer, I felt the task become easier. I still dreaded it, but at least it was a mindless endeavor now as I moved across the balcony.

As I walked into the boardroom, I saw all of the pictures and maps that the team had been taping up as Hotch was leading me to his office only a few minutes ago. I was so naïve then. I didn’t know the contents of the box or the letter, and I didn’t know what it was that they had all been hanging up and inspecting for the sake of the case. There were photos of Emily everywhere, but she looked so different. Her hair was brown instead of black, it was curly instead of straight, and she had soft bangs instead of harsh and dramatic ones— and her hair was just… longer. She didn’t look like the Emily I had known for the past three years. Then again, I was slowly starting to learn that I didn’t know her at all, and that the Emily I knew and loved was simply a facade, just as she was in those pictures hanging on the wall. She was smiling in those pictures while holding Doyle’s hand. In others, she was smiling against his lips, their fingers tangled in each other’s hair. I shook my head. She was a stranger to us. All this time, we trusted and loved her, and yet we didn’t really know anything about her. She was going to have to explain a lot when she would get back.

I was broken out of my trance when I heard the team arguing about whether or not what Emily had done undercover was moral or not. She sold Doyle weapons. She slept with him. From the looks of it, she even fell in love with him. Was that a part of the plan, or was that who Emily really was?

“It doesn’t make any sense,” Reid insisted with a hint of a whine buried behind his words. “We’re her family. We could have helped her…”

I threw the letter on the table. “Doyle’s been killing families. She ran so that he wouldn’t come after us. She’s leading him away.” Everyone glanced over at me, their faces falling as they saw how red and teary eyes I was, and how I was melted down to sniffles and quiet sobs now.

Reid stretched across the table to pick up the letter. Boy genius could have read the letter in its entirety in less than two seconds, if my math was correct, yet he kept hesitating on every other word, forcing him to practically start over every time his eyes fogged up too far with tears or he lost his train of thought.

“She doesn’t want us to go after her…” he croaked. “How could she ask that of us?”

“Because it’s too dangerous,” Hotch said.

“Her messes are our messes, though. That’s part of being a family,” I whispered. I looked around at all of them. “We have to help her.” Morgan’s gaze fell to the ground. “Derek, please… You know we have to.”

“Morgan, in the morning, you and Rossi will head to Prentiss’ apartment to see if you can find anything to tell us where she went,” Hotch continued as calmly as he could. “In the meantime, let’s get Y/N caught up to speed.”

I sent him a quick look that asked if he was really going to let me pursue this, if he was actually going to let me into the field for this. He nodded. My whole body relaxed in response, a behavioral way to thank him for knowing what I needed and giving in without starting an argument.

Everyone sat down and settled. Hotch cleared his throat. “This is personal. And I know that we’re not supposed to ever let it get personal, so… If it’s ever too much for any of you, it’s okay to take a step back.” No one seemed to be listening to him. All of us just wanted to dive straight into it so that we could catch up to Emily as fast as possible. Hotch caught the hint. “Okay.” He gestured to JJ to give him the clicker for the TV, and once she did, he began speaking. “My friend from… Well, from higher places, gave me this information about Lauren Reynolds. She was apart of a secret group working under Interpole, the CIA, and a dozen other organizations where they profiled terrorists around the world. Their last target was Ian Doyle.” He put a picture of Doyle up on the board. It was the first time I had ever seen this man’s face straight on compared to just his cheek as he was hugging or kissing Emily in any one of the photos up on the walls. “Emily had gone undercover as an arms dealer named Lauren Reynolds. Her mission was to get close enough to Doyle in order to build a stronger profile. Her undercover work, along with the entire team’s profile is what finally took him down. Jeremy Wolff was Doyle’s first victim in this spree.” He pulled up a photo of Jeremy. “He was murdered while on a morning run. His fiancé, Tsia Mosely was the victim Morgan and Prentiss found last night.”

“That was Em’s trigger to leave,” Garcia gasped.

“Clyde Easter was the leader of the profiling task force. He had come to D.C. a couple of days ago with Tsia, but after her murder last night, he ran. My friends in those higher places have already put him on the TSA’s watch list.”

“How close did Prentiss and Doyle get, though?” Rossi scoffed while looking at one of the pictures of them kissing passionately.

I shook my head and looked down.

Hotch didn’t seem to want to talk about it either. So, he instead opted to say, “Doyle fell madly in love with her. That was how they ultimately took him down.”

“Does he know that?” JJ asked.

“I would assume so.”

“That’s why he’s leaving her for last…” I whispered while running my hands over my stomach to ignore the stomachache that was slowly but surely returning.

Morgan stormed out of the room, deciding that he didn’t want to sit around long enough to hear all of this while also doing nothing. If anything, he was probably headed to go to Emily’s apartment already. Rossi stood, too, just when he put the pieces together. We all sighed and fell quiet, considering just how bad things were getting, and the fact that they could get much worse soon if we weren’t faster.

----

After Morgan and Rossi came back, they met with us in the roundtable room to discuss what it was that they had found at Emily’s apartment. Yesterday, while I was at home resting and they found Tsia’s body, Emily threw up outside, then asked Morgan to drive her home so that she could change clothes. What Morgan failed to recognize at the time was that she was packing up a go-bag so that she could leave when the time was right. But she left her safe open. Not that it was a mistake or that she was being careless, but because she knew that we were going to try to follow after her, and she was only giving us what she wanted us to know. She had tried to flush the golden necklace in Rossi’s hand, but he had spotted it just before they decided to head back to the office.

It was a Gimmel ring— a Gaelic-made wedding ring where the husband and wife’s rings would be worn separately during the engagement, then, for the wedding, they would be molded together to represent their unity. The one hanging from the chain in Rossi’s hand was already molded together. He handed it to me so that I could inspect it further. Immediately, I took to the detail of the different Gaelic marking on both rings, and how they certainly meant something in Gaelic—something only Spencer Reid himself could translate, so I passed the necklace to him. He examined it closely, too. While he was busy, I crossed my arms over my chest, shrugged, and asked what this had to do with anything. Certainly, it was just her parents’ old wedding rings, or perhaps her grandparents’. Emily was never married prior. We would have known if she were ever married.

“Ian was—” Rossi began.

“Shit—” Reid threw the necklace on the table angrily before I could get an answer from someone. We all turned to face him. He gestured to the rings, “They have Ian and Emily’s names on them.”

“As I was saying,” Rossi continued cautiously, “Doyle was part of the Irish Mob… The running theory Morgan and I had on the way over here was that it belonged to Doyle. We didn’t know that Emily was… Well, we didn’t realize… I…” He chuckled to himself and how outrageous the situation was. Did we really not know anything about her?

“Doyle ran his operations out of Boston,” Morgan said quietly from the corner. He was sitting down, unlike the rest of us, and he was staring at the closed Ian Doyle file Hotch had gotten from his friends in “higher places”. When we all turned to him, that was his cue to continue. “That was where he and Emily met.” He looked at me. “It’s important to both of them. If he’s not in D.C. anymore, which I doubt he is, he probably scurried back to what he knows, which is Boston. And since Emily wasn’t going to let him bring the fight to us, she probably ran to take the fight to him.” He slid the file away from himself like he didn’t want to stare at it any longer.

“As usual, my slice of chocolate cake is correct,” Garcia said, turning into the boardroom with a laptop in her hands, racing over to the table as if she could hear what we were talking about from across the office. “TSA just got a hit on one of Clyde Easter’s covers. He’s on his way to Boston.”

My jaw fell slightly in shock. “He probably had the same thought we did. He knows Emily just as well as we do, but he knows Doyle better. He knew that they were likely in Boston.”

“It confirms Morgan’s theory,” Hotch agreed. “Garcia, have him detained the second he gets off that plane. We’ll interrogate him when we get there.”

“Yes, sir,” she said.

“And, you’re coming with us.”

She looked up at him suddenly, uncertainty written all over her face. “Okay. Yeah. Sure.”

As she began contacting TSA again, we all headed to grab our go-bags and get ready to head for the jet. Hotch and I headed to his office. He had some extra clothes stored away in a drawer, so he carefully grabbed them to make sure they would stay folded, then slid them into his bag. I sat down at his desk to look at Emily’s gift again. The box was just staring at me. It was as if it were saying to me: “She’s already dead. You’re too late. There’s nothing you can do.” I sniffled and wiped my face clean with my palms. Hotch, from where he was standing opposite me, took notice of my behavior, yet he didn’t say anything, probably because he didn’t know what to say. If anything, he was just as panicked as I was, as frustrated as Morgan, as desperate as Reid and JJ; he just showed it differently.

On the jet, however, that was another story. Everyone sat down for takeoff, and Hotch held my hand the entire time. Even though I wasn’t scared of flying on the jet anymore, there were times when there were personal stakes involved when he needed to hold me and rub his thumb over my knuckles, and even kiss my cheek once. I melted into his touch. I turned to face him, both of us relaxing with our eyes closed, and I kissed him gently.

Once we were in the air, he tugged at my hand. “I have something to give you.” He pulled me to my feet and led me past the team, then, when there was some remnants of privacy, he handed me a piece of paper.

“What’s this?” I inquired.

“A list of Emily’s phone numbers.”

I looked up at him. “Why?”

“Most of those are unlisted, and only a select few of us know about them, but I figure that if she’ll pick up for anyone right now, it might be you, considering she left the gift for you.”

“You want me to call all of these?” The list was probably nine to ten different phone numbers. How the hell did Emily have so many different phones?

Hotch nodded. “Just try.” He squeezed my shoulder reassuringly before leaving to take a seat with the team again.

I sighed and headed towards the back of the jet. “Whatever you say, boss.”

After stepping into the small bathroom, I turned and locked the door, then I slowly sat down on the toilet seat while turning the list over in my hands so that I could start dialing. The phone didn’t even ring once. There was an immediate dial tone, followed by a voice telling me that the phone number was disconnected by the owner. I sighed and began dialing the next number. Same thing. The first four were all disconnected lines, but by the fifth one, I finally got to her voicemail before a robotic voice told me that the inbox was full. I cursed under my breath. Was that how the next four numbers were going to be, too? There was probably no point to this in the first place. Emily didn’t want us to follow her, therefore she wasn’t going to let us contact her in any way, and I should have known better.

When I reached the last phone number, I entirely anticipated that it wouldn’t work. To my surprise, however, the voicemail came and ended, but there was no robotic voice. There was a single dial tone signaling me to start speaking, so I decided to just… go for it.

“Hey. It’s, um… It’s me. I don’t know if you’re safe, so I’ll keep it brief, but… Hotch said I should try calling all of your numbers to see if I happen to hear back from you. I don’t know why I’ve been sitting on the toilet in the jet for an hour doing all of this when I know you’re not going to pick up, but I just… I had to try. This is the only number that has room left for a voicemail. I don’t even know if you’ll ever hear this, but if you are… Emily… It’s time to come home. Please. I can’t do this without you—I don’t know how to do this without you. I read your letter, and I haven’t been able to stop crying and worrying about you since then. You’re not allowed to die, Emily Prentiss. Do you hear me? I don’t care what it takes, you’re not allowed to leave us. You’re not allowed to just write a goodbye letter and then make it seem like it’s okay that you might not get to meet my baby. You don’t get to say goodbye. Not like that. You don’t get to leave and make me regret not loving you and appreciating you more. Shit…” I sniffled. “I took your love and friendship for granted, Emily, and I’m so sorry. I had all the time in the world to look at you and tell you that I appreciate everything you’ve done for me and Hotch. You’re our family, Em. You always have been and you always will be. You’re one of the greatest friends I’ve ever had, and the worst part is that I couldn’t recognize or admit it until you were gone, and I can’t say it to your face. So, I just need you to come home. I need you to survive all of this bullshit. Because you deserve to meet my baby and give them the koala bear. They deserve to fall asleep in your arms. I deserve the chance to get to look at you and say: ‘I love you, Emily Prentiss. You’re one of my best friends. Thank you.’ Morgan, Reid, Garcia, Hotch, JJ, and Rossi… We’re all waiting to see you again. We love you.”

The call beeped, signaling that I had taken too long to record my message, so it was just sending what I had already said, and that was it. I sighed and turned off my phone.

When we landed in Boston, Hotch’s phone immediately started ringing. We were all stepping off the plane when Hotch answered and stopped in his tracks on the runway. We stopped, too, to gauge just how bad the news was. Then, he hung up. He looked at us and told us that Boston P.D. just responded to a call at a local bar where there was a shooting. They had confirmed that Emily was involved.

At the precinct, we were immediately set up with a monitor so that we could watch the video to confirm whether or not it was really our Emily Prentiss. The security camera outside of the bar was set up at an awkward angle, so all we could really see was a group of men climbing into two separate black SUVS. Out of nowhere, gunfire rained onto the side of the second car, and that was when we saw Emily stepping into the frame of the camera, a MAC-10 in her hands, and a flashbang being thrown into the broken window of the car. But when she approached the car, something seemed wrong.

Suddenly, Ian Doyle revealed himself from the shadows, his gun raised at her; and before Emily could do anything, he fired.

“Oh, my—” I jumped as the gunshots rang. I stumbled back and caught my footing on a nearby desk.

She was killing me with worry at this point. Every time something bad happened to our team, it built this knot in the pit of my stomach that made me want to puke or just completely fall to my knees and give up because worrying about them—my family—was sometimes too unbearable to handle. Worrying about Hotch, Morgan, and Emily specifically were the worst moments. When Hotch was in danger, it was like I couldn’t move or breathe. When Morgan was in danger—like when he stole the ambulance in New York, I felt like my legs would give out at any second and the only thing that could put me back together was knowing that he, my best friend in the entire world, was alright. And he was. Him and Hotch were always okay. No matter how much pain they put me through, at least I could say that they were okay and they were still with me. Hotch was still by my side. Morgan was still there to tease me every chance he got. Yet, this time, with Emily in the hot seat now, it felt like things weren’t going to be okay. That knot in my stomach was twisting in ways worse than ever before—and maybe it was because the stress was putting pressure on the baby, or maybe it was the fact that I never had to worry about her like this before… or maybe it was the fact that I didn’t realize that I cared for her this much until something terrible happened that I wasn’t sure was going to end with rainbows and unicorns. This didn’t feel right. There was something about my worry for her this time around that made me feel like something horrible was going to happen. And when I heard those gunshots echo through the security footage, I thought that was it. Before I saw Doyle pry open her shirt, I was convinced that it was over. I thought for sure as I jumped out of my own skin that I was never going to see her again.

“She’s alive,” JJ said, “that’s the good news.” She sighed heavily. “She’s alive.”

“Only because Doyle wants to toy with her,” Rossi said.

“Once he’s felt he’s made his point of revenge, he’ll kill her,” Hotch added.

“It gives us time to find her, though.” I turned back around to face the team. “We’re going to have to talk to Clyde Easter. He’s the only way we can stop hitting these walls in the case like complete fucking idiots.” Everyone seemed shocked at my anger. “Sorry,” I apologized quietly.

“You’re right.” Hotch crossed his arms over his chest and started drawing his thumb around his lips while thinking. “You want the honors of talking to him?” he asked me. I nodded eagerly. “Okay. Garcia, keep trying to track their path from the bar. See if you can narrow down where it is they took her. It’s probably somewhere remote. Definitely not in the center of the city.”

“Why not?” she asked.

“Because he’ll want to hear her scream,” Morgan answered blatantly.

No one said anything.

Before I could let his depressing words continue to seep into my mind and heart, I started walking towards the mirror room. Hotch silently followed me. When we reached the door, he skipped a few steps so that he could beat me to it and hold it open for me. I thanked him with a smile.

“I’ll go in first just to loosen him up a bit. Until then, you stay back here.” Hotch grabbed the doorhandle to the interrogation room, then stepped in.

Clyde immediately pushed himself to his seat. “What is this?! I demand to talk to the British Consulate!”

“Calm down.”

“You can’t keep me here. You would know that if you would let me speak with—”

“The British Consulate. Yeah, I know.” He turned the file in his hands over. “Clyde Easter, I’m Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner—”

“Oh, my god,” Easter groaned. “What the hell are you doing in here with me, then?! Shouldn’t you be out there, looking for her?”

Hotch ignored him by opening up the file. “October of 2006. ‘In closing, I have never worked with an agent finer than Agent Prentiss. Her skill at analyzing and predicting terrorist behavior is unparalleled.’ Signed, name redacted.” Hotch threw the file on the table. “Do you want to know what it was that I read when I was given her file in October of 2006? I’ll never forget it because it was the best recommendation I had ever read. ‘In closing, I have never worked with an agent finger than Agent Prentiss. Her skill at analyzing data and predicting the behaviors of potential serial killers is unparalleled.’ Signed, name redacted. I never knew who it was that wrote that recommendation, and I never found out how it was that a small-time data analyst agent got moved from a desk job to being a profiler for the BAU. That was why it impressed me. I can remember staring at it for hours while asking myself, what was it that Cody and Strauss saw in this girl that was so different from the rest of my team that she got special permission to join the unit? I didn’t clear her. In fact, I was told that she was cleared to be on my team, and that was the end of it. But now I know how it happened. The recommendation came from you, it went to Interpol and the CIA, who then sent it to Cody as it was, and he saw an opportunity to steal away a brilliant agent from Europe and utilize her within his greatest unit at the Bureau, so he took it. You used all the right buzzwords with him, which was how Emily was transferred. But her work with your unit was confidential, so you had to write a second recommendation that used my buzzwords in order to get me off your scent.”

“Okay. And?”

“It takes a true sociopath to betray his team and the cause he held dear for self-preservation.”

“So, then, you don’t believe any of your team is capable of that kind of betrayal?”

“I know they aren’t.”

Easter chuckled. “Sure.”

“My point is, if you help us save Agent Prentiss, I might be willing to make a deal with you. Otherwise, you’ll end up in Guantanamo Bay. That’s not what you want. Is it?”

Easter didn’t say anything. Hotch had to know that his threat was entirely empty, right? I mean, we only suspected that Clyde Easter was the one who sold out his team to Doyle, but we had no way to prove it; and by the looks of it, Easter knew that. This tactic wasn’t going to work on him.

“She said you were the best,” Clyde finally said. “I’m unimpressed, however. As I’ve already said, I cannot help you.”

Hotch sighed and took his leave, reentering the mirror room to send me a look that told me that it was finally my turn. So, that was all apart of the plan. He knew that he wasn’t going to get in with Easter that way, but it would get him worked up enough that I could find a way in. I nodded and switched places with him, heading into the interrogation room.

“Hello, I’m Agent—”

“Great,” Easter threw his hands up, “another agent. Like I told the other guy, I won’t speak to any of you. I want to speak to the British Consulate first!”

I rolled my eyes and continued, “I’m Agent Hotchner.” That surely got his attention, as I knew it would. “We need your help saving Emily.”

“Like I told the other Agent Hotchner, there’s nothing I can do for you.”

I searched his eyes for a moment, reading the sparkle there that was pleading for answers and to know that Emily was safe. He cared for her just as much as we did. We were all panicked and racing around to rescue her from Doyle, yet Easter knew he couldn’t, and that was killing him slower than potentially anything Doyle had planned for him. I could use that. Unfortunately, it was my only way in with him; and by catching that slight bit of empathy hidden behind that thick skin of his, I could poke that button now to gain his favor.

So, I used the only thing I could think of. Even Hotch didn’t know this yet, but he was standing in the mirror room, so he was about to find out. “I never got the chance to tell her that she’s going to be the godmother of my child.” Easter’s attention snapped to me. “I need your help giving me that chance.”

Suddenly, as if on cue, Hotch burst into the room. “Did you know that Jeremy sold the list to Doyle?”

I cocked a brow while glancing between the two men in the room. “What?”

“I had my suspicions,” Easter answered. Any bit of rapport I had just built with him was washed away by Hotch’s interruption. Great.

“We need your team’s original profile of Ian Doyle so that we can save Emily’s life,” Hotch said.

“I can’t do that—”

“We need to know who he is as a terrorist in order to profile him as a torturer and serial killer.”

“I can’t do that,” he repeated, this time with his voice fluctuating to tell us that there was more to be said, “without making a deal first.” I rolled my eyes. “You have to kill Ian Doyle yourself. Even if it means killing him without cause.”

“No.”

“You must. If you don’t kill him, then he’s going to keep going after her.”

“I said, no. We don’t kill people without reason.”

“Then, you must do whatever it takes to keep Emily alive. If you think he’s a danger to her, then you must kill him. Protect her at all costs, Agent Hotchner.”

Hotch hesitated for a moment. “Okay.”

The door opened again. JJ was standing in the entryway, still holding onto the doorknob, leaning into the room as she said, “The British Consulate just arrived.”

“Tell them—” Hotch began.

Easter cut him off, “Tell them that their assistance is not required. I’m now consulting with the BAU on a case. That is… if Agent Hotchner agrees to the rest of my terms.” We all looked at him blankly. “Privately.”

The room was silent for a moment as we all stayed still, watching each other intently, waiting for someone to say something. There was no way Hotch was going to agree to that. Easter could ask for anything, and with how desperate we were, Hotch would probably give in, and we all knew it—Easter most of all. At least together we could become a voice of reason for one another. Alone, we were weak. Together, we were unbreakable and perfect. Working together every single day then being able to go home with a still healthy and loving relationship proved that much to everyone who ever doubted us, including JJ, who was still standing at the door.

“Go catch up with the team,” Hotch ordered me quietly.

“Hotch—”

“Go.”

“Aaron, this is a bad—”

“Go,” he ordered more demandingly, his eyes staring into mine with a look that Dominated me into submission. “Go.”

I looked away from him and headed out of the interrogation and mirror rooms with JJ, but I didn’t go to catch up with the team as Hotch had intended— hell, I didn’t even stick around JJ’s side long enough to let her see me kick a wall as hard as I could. I had him. I had Easter right where I fucking wanted, and as usual, Hotch came in to muck it up, thinking that he was saving the day; but now he was alone in there, making whatever deal it was with Easter instead of trusting me—his closest ally and coworker, and his wife. It was infuriating. I could have gotten Easter’s help without all of these extra steps and dramatics. Maybe Hotch was just mad that I brought up the fact that I wanted Emily to be our baby’s godmother. I hadn’t told him about that yet, and it was a rude way for me to let him know what I was thinking, I’d be the first to admit, but he had no right storming in there to break the sudden news that it was Jeremy who had sold out his own team. Fucking Jeremy. Did Tsia know? Clearly Emily and Clyde didn’t. But how could Jeremy possibly do that to his own team? It just begged the question that Easter had asked, were we so sure one of us wouldn’t do the same thing if we were desperate? I shook off the thought. There was no way in hell we would betray each other. We were family. We didn’t keep secrets—at least, none of us except for Emily…

“Sweetness,” Morgan cooed, carefully approaching me. I turned to him while huffing. He threw his hands up in surrender once he saw how red my face was from getting angry and taking it out on the defenseless wall. “You okay?”

“No,” I answered blatantly.

He lowered his hands. “Same.”

I sighed and rested my back against the wall. “I don’t hate her, I swear. I’m just…”

“Worried.”

I looked at him. “Yeah.”

“Me, too.”

“Hotch and Easter are making some kind of deal, I guess,” I said, changing subjects quickly because I felt like if I kept talking about her and the way I missed her, I would fall apart.

Morgan nodded. “They’re already done.” As I cocked a curious brow at him, he gestured behind him as if to say: “They’re waiting for us.” I still didn’t understand, though. “Easter’s presenting his team’s original profile to us.”

I immediately pushed myself off the wall, caught my footing, and stormed past Morgan to head to the boardroom where our team was set up. They were all waiting around patiently. Easter and Hotch were at the front of the room, both silent as they caught a glimpse of me and Morgan entering the room. I watched Hotch carefully while I circled the room and sat down in an empty chair. I was trying to get a read on the situation. What was it that he and Easter said to each other? Did he agree to any deal? Was the deal entirely outrageous? Was he ever going to tell me about the deal? Honestly, if it were important—or if he had taken the deal, he would tell me. Like I said a thousand times before, we didn’t keep secrets from each other. I trusted that he would tell me the truth in due time.

Easter cleared his throat as he began reciting the profile for us. Ian Doyle was a terrorist known under the name of Valhalla. Most of his work was spent in the U.S. smuggling weapons for the Irish Mob, but when he met Lauren Reynolds—or as we knew her, Emily Prentiss—he turned his attention towards building his own empire. His first attack was on his own uncle in Ireland. It was a calculated attack to gain power within the family, and it worked, however, it cost twenty-three innocent people their lives, too. After that, Doyle had to stay low while planning his next attack for power, which was going to be on a rival in Germany. That was when the clock started racing for Emily to complete the profile sooner. After a few months of staying undercover with Doyle in the farmlands of Italy, she reported back to her team with the following information: He was a power-assertive psychopath, who was highly controlling and precise, and if something ever went the slightest bit off plan, he lost his shit.

Sounded like someone I knew. I looked over at Hotch quickly.

“He had a son,” Easter continued. “I don’t know anything about him. Name, age, appearance, anything. Emily was very protective of him, claiming that we were there to profile Doyle, not ruin a child’s life. So, we never pried about it; though, in hindsight, perhaps we should have.”

“Doyle’s son isn’t listed in any of the information in these files,” Morgan said.

“His existence was Need-to-Know only. From what I can tell, Doyle didn’t even put his name on his own son’s birth certificate in order to protect him.”

“But he kept him close,” Hotch said, “so, someone had to raise him.”

“I’ll check employee records,” Garcia said, already typing away on her computer. “I got him!” Garcia cheered. “His name is Declan Jones. He settled in Boston eight years ago with his adopted guardian, Louise Jones, Doyle’s housekeeper.”

“Are they still alive?” Hotch interrogated.

“They went missing seven years ago— Oh, my god—” She looked away from her screen after pressing a single key that projected what she saw up on the monitor for the rest of us.

There were dozens of photos of Declan and Louise on the dirty floor of an abandoned warehouse, duct tape on the mouths, ropes on their wrists, tears streaming down their faces. And then there was a gun being pointed at their heads. I shook my head in denial. No. Please. The next few images were of them being executed one by one. I closed my eyes in disappointment, disgust, and distraught.

“Wait…” Reid whispered under his breath, taking a few steps closer to the screen. “Morgan, look at this.” I opened my eyes long enough to see them both squinting at the screen. “Look at the fingernails. Who do we know that chews on them to that extent?”

“Emily,” Morgan answered lightly, as if shock were settling in his stomach.

“I think I found the warehouse where these pictures were taken,” Garcia spoke up. Suddenly, all of our phones dinged with an address.

Hotch examined it for a moment. “Okay. We’ll give it a shot.”

The team scattered to go collect their gear. Meanwhile, Garcia and JJ stayed put. I, on the other hand, had something on my mind. So, I carefully snuck out of the boardroom and tracked down Hotch to a room where they had a stack of FBI bulletproof vests. I stopped around the corner, however, when I heard Hotch getting off the phone with Strauss. Why the hell was he calling Strauss? I didn’t understand.

Within the next few moments, Hotch was getting ahold of a SWAT team to meet them at the location. While I was eavesdropping, I heard him mention that it was a high-risk situation. My heart started racing in my chest, and I felt like I was going to cry or start panicking. It felt like I was going to lose everyone at once, and the worst part was that I couldn’t do anything about the situation to tilt fate one way or another. If it were me out there, I would have jumped in front of any bullet aimed at anyone on the team. But I wasn’t going out there with them. I was being forced to stay back with JJ and Garcia. How was I supposed to trust that Spencer would jump in front of Hotch? He wouldn’t. The scariest part was that, if I lost Hotch or Morgan, as well as Emily, I wouldn’t know what to do. My life felt like it was crumbling into dust in my hands, and every anxious idea I ever had in my life was consuming me in that moment.

“Y/N?” Hotch waved a hand in my face. I snapped out of my trance long enough to look up at him with foggy eyes. “Baby, it’s going to be okay…” he cooed, wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling me close, our foreheads pressed against each other. “I’m going to have a body cam on so that you can make sure I’m safe the whole time.”

“Please be careful out there,” I whispered.

His breath was hot on my nose as he said. “I will. I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

He kissed my lips quickly, yet still passionately, before pulling himself away from me and hurrying out of the room, trading spots with Morgan who needed to grab his vest. My eyes followed him. For a short moment, neither of us said anything, giving me a chance to read his body language. Everything about him was angry. Since we knew for sure that Emily was involved in all of this, Morgan had decided that he was going to be pissed off with her compared to just trying to be understanding and focus on finding her until we could ask her all of our questions.

“Are you going to be okay out there?” I questioned. He nodded while pulling the vest over his head. “Do me a favor, then?” He nodded again. “Watch his back for me since I can’t.”

Morgan looked up at me as he snapped the velcro straps together. “I’ll try.”

I flung my arms around him without warning. He stumbled back before catching me, his arms somewhat embracing me since he didn’t want to squeeze me too hard with my baby bump in the way. I hid my face against the hem of his v-neck. “Thank you.” I let out a sigh. “She’ll be okay.” I knew that had been weighing on his mind, and that was why he was incredibly upset with her. He just cared for her the same way he cared for me and Garcia, and he just couldn’t imagine losing any of us; so, he was taking that anxiety out on all of us using anger… He just needed to hear, “She’s going to be okay,” again, though, and it seemed to help somewhat.

----

Things spiraled quickly and without any warning. Just as SWAT kicked down the door, gunfire was exchanged, causing Hotch, Morgan, Rossi, and Reid to all scatter and find another way into the building. Reid and Morgan went together, but Hotch and Rossi went to the right. They were splitting up. No. Please. Morgan promised that he would watch Hotch’s back for me. I needed them to be together, to make sure that they were both okay, and that they were going to come back to me.

A man stepped out of the door Hotch and Rossi were headed towards. Just as the man raised his weapon at Hotch, I gasped, my hand flying up to cover my mouth in a panic. Rossi shot the man first, though. My shoulders relaxed and I let myself catch my breath. Garcia, on the other hand, had finally decided that enough was enough, and she turned away at the first sight of blood.

Finally, Rossi grabbed ahold of the door before it could slam shut, and Hotch ran in, careful to check every dark corner, every open room, and every locked door. This was the dangerous part. Anyone could have jumped out at any time, catching him off guard, taking him and the chance to say goodbye away from me. Yet, there was no one there. It was like a ghost town until they met up with SWAT again towards the exit of the building where all of the bodies of Doyle’s men were piled up from their failed attempt to fight back.

“We’ve cleared this area,” the SWAT leader told Hotch. “We’re clearing the rest of the building now.”

“We got the right—” Hotch began responding.

“Hotch!” Morgan shouted into the comms. “Prentiss is down!”

My face fell. What the fuck was he talking about? Where was Doyle? How had things spiraled so quickly? The team had only just infiltrated the building, and now there were no eyes on Ian Doyle, and Morgan was claiming that something was wrong with Emily. I refused to believe that she was dead. I didn’t care what he said. There was no way in hell I was going to lose her like this, and there was no way I was never going to see her again. It just wasn’t possible.

Hotch turned on his heels and started dashing in the opposite direction of the exit to go find Morgan in order to see what was really going on. I didn’t believe it. Emily was somewhat of a trickster, though she would never outright admit it. Her and Morgan were devious together, though. I could remember the way she and I used to pick on him for the smallest things, and then the next day, they would team up to prank me as payback. Emily was never the instigator or victim in those cases. She just went with the flow, and she always had the brightest smile on her face. So, I was sure that Hotch was about to turn that corner, and what we were going to see was Emily Prentiss with that bright, toothy grin lighting up her face and the entire room, and Morgan would be laughing behind her at our expense.

“Y/N,” JJ whispered to me, her eyes moving from the monitor to me. I didn’t look at her. “Y/N, you’re hypervent—”

“It’s not true,” I insisted quickly.

Honestly, I hadn’t even realized how lightheaded I was until JJ said something, but that wasn’t going to break my concentration. I was just waiting for Hotch to turn that corner. In just a few moments, all of my suspicions would be confirmed, and I would be able to calm down. I’d be able to breathe, sit down, maybe drink something cold to keep me from puking everywhere.

And then I saw her.

For the briefest moment, I saw her raven hair, and I smiled. For just a single millisecond, I thought that everything was alright, and that we were going to all go home tonight together, and I’d never let her go again. But then Hotch stepped closer. He was hesitant at first, almost like he couldn’t believe what he saw, yet as Morgan’s pleas for help got louder, Hotch ran over to her and grabbed her hand with Morgan. Once he was close enough, I could see the large wooden stake buried in her stomach, right where all of the most vital organs lived.

She was losing consciousness. Her eyes kept fluttering, as if she was fighting her very hardest to keep looking at them. Despite both Morgan and Hotch trying to convince her to keep her eyes open, however, Emily was ultimately starting to slowly close her eyes, her head tilting to the side. A sob left me without warning.

“Hotch…” Emily whispered. She could hardly move, breathe, or speak, yet she was still trying. She was so strong. She always was. She was the strongest person I knew. She could get through this. She could get through anything. “Hotch…”

“I’m right here,” he cooed.

She sighed weakly. “Tell… Tell Y/N I’m sorry… And… I… They didn’t take me for granted…”

“Stop it, Prentiss. You’re going to talk to them yourself,” Morgan insisted.

Her hand was starting to release his, though, and her head was falling back as her eyes couldn’t stay open any long. Hotch shook his head and leaned into her desperately. “Come on, Emily. Stay awake for us. The medics are almost here.” I saw a tear of his land on her collarbone. “Please.” But she wasn’t moving anymore. “Please…”

“No, no, no, no,” Morgan mumbled under his breath as Emily stopped breathing. “No. Emily—” He pressed his palms against her chest to begin performing CPR. “Where are the fucking medics?!”

Just then, as if they realized just how late they were running, a group of medics came storming into the room. Morgan kept pumping Emily’s lungs, but Hotch took a step back to leave the professionals room to help save Emily. I fell into the chair behind me. I couldn’t lose her. Not like this. Not when I was entirely unable to help her or even say goodbye. I wanted to tell her that she had nothing to be sorry for, and that I was the stupid one who did take her for granted, but I loved her so much. I wanted to look at her and tell her that. I wanted it to be with her in that moment, holding her and telling her to keep breathing and blinking because she was going to be the godmother of my child. She had every reason to live now. If for some dumb fucking reason she thought it was okay to let go now in order to spare us some kind of pain, that wasn’t the truth! She had to know that she was going to be a real part of our family now. We needed her here. I needed her here.

Suddenly, she let out a gasp as she woke up. Morgan immediately stumbled back, falling onto his tailbone so that he could be out of the way, too. Within an instant, the medics were sliding her onto a stretcher, then working together to carry her outside, Hotch and Morgan following closely.

“What…” I cleared my throat. “What hospital…”

“St. Bernard’s!” Morgan answered while racing on his toes towards the SUV so that he could drive behind the ambulance.

I pushed myself up to my feet, inviting JJ and Garcia’s stretched out arms that were there to catch me in case I ended up collapsing, which honestly felt entirely possible now. But I tried my best to ignore it.

JJ drove while Garcia and I sat in the back together, holding hands in an attempt to help ease our nerves. We were both shaking like chihuahuas. Honestly, I wasn’t even sure how it was that JJ got us to the hospital safe and sound. If I were driving, I would have crashed before leaving the parking lot of the police station. By the time we were stepping out of the SUV, I thought I was going to pass out due to the nerves, yet JJ still seemed like an unwavering force in the face of disaster. She was set on the path of one thing and one thing only… Finding the team and seeing if Emily was alright. In fact, she seemed more determined than any of the rest of us.

When we found the waiting room, we discovered that the team was sitting around in silence. They had all taken their vests off and thrown them onto a single chair in the corner. Morgan was on his own, staring down at his bloody hands. Meanwhile, Reid and Rossi were together, staring at the wall, both of them entirely lost in thought. And then there was Hotch… He was sitting just ahead of me, his face buried in his hands as his knee bounced like crazy. He had taken off his tie, and the top button of his dress shirt was undone, just as his cufflinks had been undone, too. My face pouted. When he looked up at me, I saw just how distraught he was, and I knew that the only thing that could possibly help make things better was to hold each other close. He seemed to have the same thought because he pushed himself to his feet and held out his arms for me.

“Have you guys heard anything?” I asked as I flung my arms around Hotch.

“Nothing yet.”

“I’m going to talk to the doctors,” JJ said, already walking out of the room.

Hotch let go of me slightly, giving me a chance to turn around to see that Morgan still hadn’t looked up from his hands. I whispered to Hotch that he should sit down and wait for me to come back. He nodded and did as he was told. Without saying anything, I left the waiting room to find a nurse to see if she could give me a cloth and a water bottle in order to wipe all of the blood off of Morgan. When I had what I needed, I returned to the room to see that Garcia was trying to console him already, so I handed the materials to her then went to sit down next to Hotch.

Without hesitating, Hotch took my hand in his, and he hid his face against my bicep. “I can’t do this,” he whispered.

“It’s okay. She’s going to be okay.”

He shook his head, but he didn’t say anything.

A few minutes later, as JJ returned from tracking down the doctors to get an update on how Emily was doing, we all sat up straight to hear the news. Though, nothing technically had to be said. Just from her posture, her puffy, red face, and the way her lip was quivering, I knew that it wasn’t good. Maybe she wouldn’t be able to come back to the FBI? Maybe she wouldn’t be able to walk again? No. I had to stop imaging the worst. JJ just had to tell us. So, we waited for her to gain the courage.

“She never made it off the table,” she finally admitted.

“No,” I shook my head in denial. “No, you’re lying.”

JJ just stared at all of us while blinking away the tears.

I kept shaking my head. “JJ, where is she?”

She didn’t move.

“JJ!” I exclaimed angrily, pushing myself to my feet.

Hotch tried to pull me down. I felt my breath shudder as a choked back sob slowly crept out of my chest. The whole world was crashing down on me. The pain I felt in New York was nothing compared to this. The pain of seeing Haley dead on our bedroom floor was lightyears away from this. This wasn’t real. I was dreaming. Emily wasn’t gone. She probably just got out of surgery and her first thought was to have JJ play some kind of a sick joke on us. Well, ha ha. I wanted to see her now.

Reid stood from his chair and tried to push past JJ, but she caught him in a hug. When I saw them both break down into tears, I finally realized that this was real. This was happening. My knees buckled and I wavered slightly. Hotch jumped up and wrapped his arms around me so that I wouldn’t fall over. I cried out and sobbed as hard as I could. She was supposed to come home. She was supposed to meet my baby.

-------------

criminal minds family: @peggy1999 @gorgeousdarkangel @alex--awesome--22 @oceaneblu @brithedemonspawn @absolutemarveltrash @bshelley322 @rousethemouse @sunshinepower17 @weexinling @pettttyyyc​ @braty-angel

[xxrainstormxx]

Save it for the Doctor. Spencer Reid x Reader.

(A/N: this is based off a writing prompt. "You're... beautiful." "And you're concussed") Word count; 2,475 Part 2 (edit: my pleas for requests for stories are not reaching people so I will beg here. If you want a oneshot I’ll write it. Prompt or no prompt.)

I had heard a lot about the recent murders. I even had seen a few almost survivors on my mom's operation table, yet somehow I was wrapped up in the middle of it. Smack in the middle. No normal citizen even knew the FBI was investigating the murders and yet I was being interrogated. The man who sat in front of me was just mean, he wore a serious look and his eyes never moved from the narrow eyed glare he gave anyone who walked by and especially gave me. I was happy to cooperate, but the minute I was under fire I was fed up and wanted a lawyer. I was no killer, I had no upper body strength to move a dead body and believe me, I would know how much a dead body weighs thanks to my mom training me. I was a tired college student trying to get my damn degree so I could move on with my fucking life. And I was not in the mood to be interrogated when I could be working on my thesis. The mean man, Agent Hotchner I believe was just staring. I guess waiting for me to break or some shit like that? I don't know. I wasn't talking first. I didn't care anymore and this resulted in a match of silently staring waiting for the other one to speak. This went on for what felt like an hour but was probably closer to at least three minutes, I just sighed, "I cave." I sighed muttering curses as I shifted in my seat. "Go on, ask your questions I have a thesis to write and I would like to go home to continue it," I reluctantly urged on. He leaned forward in triumph I think as he demanded answers from me. "Where were you the night of Synthia Robbin's disappearance (Y/N)?" he began dwelling on the poor girls name. It made me frown, she was a 13 year old girl, a child, and she was gone. Kidnapped and found dead. It made me sick to think of what could happen to her. "So that's what this is about?" I hissed disgusted with the accusation "I was at the library with Emmalin." the mention of my sister's name made him further darken. "Your sister, correct?" he inquired. I rolled my eyes, "Yuduh" I sounded sitting back. "All your time is accounted for?" he continued leaving me puzzled for a moment. "There were maybe ten minutes in between where she left to find a book." I murmured unsure if the truth was the right thing to say as he stood and pulled out a file and threw it on the table making me flinch. "What about the night of Chris Bennidict?" he asked "A s-sports game" I stuttered "A baseball game I think. Rockies vs Rangers." I said shaking a little as he threw down that files some of the pictures falling out of the boy, shot twice. "Eunice Quiet, Quiara Basson, Basen Unice, Lynch Gryse, and Philip Jence!" he got  louder with every file he threw at me. "You were near by every single scene and you fit most of our profile" he concluded the pictures that fell out made me physically sick. Children, those poor babies. I sobbed and turned away gagging, he wasn't convinced it was real but I knew it was and up came the vomit that was caught in my throat.

I had no doubt I fit their profile but I worked part time at a daycare. Children were my life line, and it mad me sick to see them hurt. He answered a call and left the room leaving me there to cry over the pictures. A brunette woman walked in and sighed taking me out of the handcuffs attaching me to the bolted down table. "Come on sweetheart. We'll get someone to clean up that." she sighed very tired, I wanted to know why. They brought me out to the main area of the station and sat me down. They slowly cuffed me to the desk and I cried softly. I looked across the station to see Emmalin "Emmy!" I called but was ignored causing me to frown. So I shut up and listen to whatever raving was in my defense, "My baby sib? A murderer?" she asked "well... it isn't that hard to believe," she said making my jaw drop. "They've always been a little too obsessed with the idea of death." A lie, I had an emo phase and so did she, "Introverted" well partially true. "and well she creeps out her friends," she finished causing me to stand suddenly, "Liar!" I shouted "You fucking liar!" I cried ignoring the pain and stress on my wrist the hand cuff was causing. I was now a 45 degree angle due to the cuffs keeping me in place. She seemed genuinely shocked i was there. "Why are you trying to pin this on me. Your own sister!b You were with me everywhere we went and those bodies were found. Why aren't you being questioned too? Did you lie? Did you say I was the only one there?" I screamed as I was sat down. She hissed at me and most of the agents took notice. Agent Prentiss, the nice brunette sighed and walked to my now horrible sister and asked her to follow her into a different interrogation room. It felt like hours that I was sat there, and a curly haired man was sat in front of me just reading, or what I thought was faking, really bad faking. "Why are you even sitting here if you're just going to pretend to read?" I asked the "doctor". My mother was a doctor and I didn't believe this boy was any kind of doctor. I had gotten to know his name as Doctor Reid and I wasn't allowed to call him an agent so I had no other choice. He just looked at me thrown for a moment before shaking his head "I'm not pretending" He stated as he shifted "No one can read that fuckin fast ya damn liar" I muttered not necessarily hostile just a little vexed. "I can. Did you know that our unconscious minds can process sixteen bits of information per second? Our conscious minds, however, can process sixteen million?" I sat back unimpressed "You are... absolutely insane" I laughed "Insane, perhaps but I'm not being accused of murder." he stated, and my smile that i worked so hard to get disappeared "You think I did it too." I muttered, it was meant to come as a question but instead it came as a statement. He shook his head "Not fully, while you do supposedly fit the profile our profile, our unsub wouldn't inject themselves into the investigation. The one part that doesn't fit" he said sitting back and crossing his legs turning to the board filled with evidence, and all those pictures that made me sick sat right next to the happy photos of the children in their school uniforms smiling big. I tried to focus on those "Well maybe your profile is wrong, cause this is sick." I hissed "(Y/N), you're here most likely because you were in the wrong places at the wrong times. Kids being picked up and murdered minutes apart from each other, while you were out with your sister at those locations? It's not very probable."

I just sighed knowing he was probably right "There aren't many coincidences when it comes to murder" he stated "Out of uh... curiosity what is an unsub? No normal person knows that is." I muttered as I tried to avoid the board, the thought of being in those places, not helping those kids, not even having a clue what was happening made me sick. "Unknown Subject" Dr. Reid said mumbling "Why aren't you uh... looking at the board. I thought you'd be proud of your work." He said as if to egg me on. I rolled my eyes "Those pictures make me sick." I muttered "I work at a daycare, it's my job to protect kids not watch them get hurt. I don't wanna see dead fucking children!" I shouted realizing I probably sounded fucking crazy and definitely like a kill. I hung my head in shame. "I know... I know it isn't fair to blame myself for what happened to those kids, but being in the places of the crime, the same night it happened, it makes me feel like I could have and should have done something. Something other than just sit there and wonder." I whispered "Yeah I feel guilty now but, not of what you think" I whispered looking to the board once more focusing on the pictures of the children when they were alive. "Sweet innocent babies... Never done anything to anyone. Probably were crying for their mom." I whimpered at the thought "They didn't deserve any of what happened" I looked away once more thinking about the mothers. "Moms.... Their moms" he stood up as if he had a damn epiphany nearly knocking me backwards in the chair. "Morgan, it's not an attack on the children it's an attack on their mothers." He said starting to put of pictures of older women. "think about it. They all went to the same cafe every day. It wasn't the day care, so it can't be (Y/N). They wouldn't see much of the parents" he enthused writing things down that I could not decipher because his hand writing was absolute shit. "But wouldn't that just give them more reason? They think these women are bad mom's for working instead of taking care of the child, and wants to teach them a lesson?" making him shake his head "That's stupid, if they wanted to make them suffer they'd just kill the women themselves, it'd be much more efficient and wouldn't lead to them doing the one thing they would dread doing!" he said circling one name on the board. Emmalin. "That's also sexist. Women work, children can't go with. Why would I have a fucking problem with that" I shouted across the room. "Who fits the profile while also holding these sexist values." Reid stated more than asked pointing to Emma's name again. "Oh dear god." he sighed "But my sister isn't a murderer!" I cried. "She's connected to the murders... and she's made it clear she doesn't think women should work." Morgan stated and went to the interrogation room. "You are a life saver (Y/N)" Reid said kissing my cheek out of pure joy, and I slapped him as a natural instinct and turned red "Shit! I'm sorry! I'm not used to boys doing that if they aren't being creepy! But at the same time that was really fucking creepy" I yelped as he held his face and laughed "No it's fine. Got too excited to fix what felt like a huge mistake." he said, and when I say I turned red I mean red. This was the first time I'd seen him as a human. Not a super genius, not as an agent, not an asshole. Just a normal guy with pretty eyes, a good jaw line, soft hair, and the sweetest smile I had ever seen. The blush was apparently very clear on my (skin color) skin because he hummed and smiled "Did you know blushing is speculated to be caused by a sudden rush of adrenaline making our blood pump faster." I giggled a little "Is that why you're so flushed?" I asked as he blinked not understanding just how damn pink he was after that rant. "Guess so." he shrugged. the door opened and out came Emmalin and she grabbed a ceramic vase off a desk and slammed it down onto Reid's head and ran away quickly. He fell to the floor because it was a heavy fucking vase, and I freaked out as he hit his head on the desk on the way down.

"Shit!" I yelled as half of them chased my very obviously guilty sister and I sat in shock as two of his friends rushed over to help him. Morgan uncuffed me and I blinked "Spencer?" Agent Jareau asked worried and I sat down next to him sitting him up and grabbing a water bottle slashing it on his face "Do not fall asleep." I said firmly "You could very well have a concussion." I said as an ambulance arrived quickly, he was cearly not feeling good because of the way that he was acting. I was worried about how sick he looked. He threw up half way to the hospital so I was told. I went with because I didn't feel safe with my sister on the run and an Agent in the hospital. Well I guess he wasn't an agent he was a doctor. The doctor, not Spencer, came out and i stood with the other two very worried. "He'll be fine. He has a mild concussion." as i thought "but he's awake, and on some pain medication. I take it you all know the situation and his limitations in the field?" he asked and Morgon and Jareau nodded "You can go back to see him now" he said and stepped aside "come on" Jareau said quietly to me "oh. Agent, I don't think he'd want to see me." I said quietly. "I'm sure he would like to know you came. You won't make a very good profiler if you can't even tell that Reid enjoys your company. And call me JJ, it makes it easier," she said giggling and pulled me right back with her and Morgan. "Hey man" Morgan started "What happened?" he muttered groaning in pain. "You got hit with a vase, took a pretty sweet fall, and got a concussion" JJ hummed arms crossed as she leaned on the wall. "Shit." he muttered making me giggle. "Oh hey!" he said when he saw me. "I want water, and jello" he muttered making small lip smacking sounds. "Morgan and I will get it" JJ laughed leaving me in a very awkward situation. "So umm.." I began before being cut off. "You know.. You're beautiful" he said staring at me causing me to snort "And you're concussed." I laughed shaking my head "Well, a concussion based on the severity doesn't necessarily affect your judgement of a person especially if it's a first time thing. I thought you were beautiful long before I was concussed but you were a suspect. Suspects being beautiful, hard to comprehend sometimes." I laughed "You're a dumbass" I snorted "But I-" he blinked and i walked over pecking his lips. "How about a date sometime? I'll give you my number" I said quietly. "Yeah... okay..." he whispered. "A date."

[swiss-cheeze]

Spencer Reid & Aaron Hotchner || ‘I love you’ ‘then perish’

REQUESTED: YES/NO

Gender: uh, they/them but there are mentions of the reader having their own kids; obviously there are single fathers so the reader 100% can be male or female or simply NB if that's what you prefer.

Warnings: child abductions/killings, normal CM crime talk, talk of trauma/abuse/drugs/drug abuse/the stuff Spencer has gone through, dismissal of trauma.

-------

Aaron Hotchner

10 children had been abducted, in less than 48 hours. We all know the statistics, which is why you didn't exactly understand why the hell you were still allowing children to go to school and out to the park. You brought it up to Hotch.

“Why is it exactly that we’re still allowing children to go out?” you questioned with crossed arms, the team looked at you skeptically but stayed silent.

“Because it’ll draw out our abductor that we can apprehend,” Hotch said, staring at the victim board. Every single photo was of a child or a family with children, this abductor didn't leave any trace evidence except for a handwritten note from the child saying how much they hated their home life, it had gone through forensic for prints and to make sure the writing was in fact done by a child; it was, each and every one of those letters was written by the kids.

“Why don't we lay low, say the FBI aren't doing their best, it'll drag the unsub out, or keep the kids home! He’ll get bored an-”

“And skip town for more children and probably leave the others behind to die (L/n)” Hotch cut in with a stern look, “I understand you have children of your own but-”

“Hotch this has nothing to do with that!” you exclaimed, the team is now filtering out of the door, “it has to do with the fact we’re trying to do our jobs the best and this isn't the best! The mayor and council are on our asses about everything and we’re still allowing more children to be taken!” you threw your arms around in an effort for Hotch to see what you’re saying, but he refused.

“(L/n) this conversation is now over,” the unit chief said harshly, “we are doing our best and our best is-”

“Agent Hotchner?” a voice called, an officer had walked into the room without realising, “more children have been kidnapped,” the officer handed you the evidence bag, or bags you should say, “four notes, four kids, but there’s um,” the officer took a breath and cleared his throat, “a body has just been discovered and the chief thinks its Ashley Leif,” and with that the officer left. You sighed as you looked down at the letters, feeling the weights in your hands, the tears, the markings, the- hold on. It's signed. You cocked an eyebrow as you placed the bag on the table.

“What is it (L/n)?” Hotch called, you didn't answer and instead took the evidence bags with you to the front of the building where the rest of your team stood waiting. Hotch could see you handing the letters to Reid, obviously to read through faster and determine if it was in fact written by a child, as your mouth moved at a million miles an hour, a lot of the team nodding along with you and talking. It felt cold without you in the room with Hotch. Maybe he should take your advice.

-------

Five kids dead, 8 still missing. Four days. You walked out of one of the offices as the wails of a child-less couple followed before you closed the door, the officers seemed to give you sympathetic looks as you stormed into the conference room yourself and the team were in.

“We have nothing,” you exclaimed as you slammed the door, causing J.J. and Emily to jump at your sudden outburst, “we have notes, we have a signed piece of paper that isn't a child name in the database for this town-” you flopped into one of the seats with your head in your hand as Emily came up and rubbed your shoulders.

“We’ll find him (Y/n)” the woman said softly, you didn't say anything as she left and the room went quiet again.

“How is he even getting these kids huh?” you asked, “they just suddenly up and leave in the middle of the...night…” it took you a second before you glanced at the crime scene photos of the child's bedroom; undisturbed. The team caught on as you quickly moved to the board and examined every photo, taking them all down and laying them out on the table in front of you as the team curled behind you.

“What is it (L/n)?” Rossi asked.

“It’s all undisturbed,” you muttered softly, you could feel the breath of your teammates against the back of your neck, “what...what if these kids aren't being taken?” you questioned, “what if they go out at the time, say a family dinner with a friend, they go home and that friend asks to stay the night, they take the kid and then-”

“The crime scene is undisturbed because the kids trust who it is; ‘come help me outside for a moment’ and they go” J.J. finished for you, you grinned as you phoned Garcia.

“Ready and waiting!” Garcia's voice came through the speakers, her fingers poised.

“Are there any friends from every family? People that overlap that are maybe mentioned in social media of most if not all the families?” you asked.

“Family friend, me likey” Garcia said happily as she started typing, “uhh, we have one; Emelia June, friends of all the families and- oh no” Garcia softened her voice.

“What? Garcia what is it?” you asked quickly.

“She's a director for a class the kids all went to for arts and crafts” Garcia said quickly, “her class roll is sent to your phones and tablets now!”

“Address Garcia?” you asked quickly as the team started putting on their vests, you included.

“Work and Address on your phones now, go get her my babies!”

“Rossi, Spencer, Emily go to the work address, the rest of us will go to her home and go from there, Emelia is dangerous and is most likely holding those kids in a separate location,” you said as Emily and Hotch started rounding up some officers and the rest of you ran to the cars.

------

Emelia was caught but had to be interrogated in order to find the kids, luckily they were all unharmed and had food and water, she was sentenced 25 to life.

“(Y/n), can i see you in my office please?” Hotch called as you started packing up your files to finish at home. You gave a slight side eye to your friends before wrapping your bag around yourself and walking to the office in question.

“Did i do something wrong?” you asked monotone as Hotch waited behind his desk.

“You took ahold of the investigation when apprehending Emelia,” Hotch said, “that isnt your job-”

“Neither was yours to let those fucking kids die” you said quickly as your arms crossed over your chest. Hotch sighed.

“I understand this is hard for the both of us with our relationship both work and romance but you need to trust me (Y/n)” Hotch sighed, this only made you angrier, “i know you find it hard to trust others and to be trusted but for this to work you have to understand i know what i'm doing and what i'm doing, including my job, is right” by now you where fuming, “i know this case was hard especially with you having kids of your own-”

“Fuck you,” you cut Hotch off, him looking at you surprised, “i have kids, you have a kid too Hotch. You had a wife and when you came to me seeking some sort of love and affection i was happy to give it to you when you needed it, i loved those dates, i loved everything but really? I'm getting too personal with that case because I care about young lives?” you asked with a scoff, “im sorry but if thats a problem for you then we have a pretty big fucking problem here�� you motioned between yourself and Hotch on ‘here’.

“(Y/n)-”

“No, dont ‘(Y/n)’ me,” you said with a laugh, “you do this all the time! You dont allow me to do my own job-”

“Let me explain-” Hotch started once again, but you stopped him by walking out of the office.

“My resignation letters went in three weeks ago for Crimes Against Children, i go next week, i'll say goodbye to the team tomorrow” you said walking down the stairs and past your teammates who heard everything.

“You're leaving?” Derek asked, you could hear him but you didn't acknowledge him and kept walking, Hotch walked slightly faster and grabbed your arm, pulling you back to him.

“I love you (Y/n)” his voice was low and wavering, it was full of emotions but you couldn't care less.

“Then perish” you said finally, and with that.

It was all over.

You yanked your arm from Hotch, turned, and walked off without looking back.

Spencer Reid

Spencer was sick of it, he really was. He loved you, of course he did, but there was always something about you that just didn't sit right with him; you weren't too clingy, you weren't too protective, you were perfect. But you didn't believe he had all the trauma he constantly said he had. You jump scared him and of course his fist almost comes in contact with your nose, you scream his name and he comes in with his gun held just to see a photo of a dog, you always dismiss his trauma at the worst of times.

Anniversary of his abduction and drugging? ‘Lol no that doesn't happen to people like you, even back then’.

Anniversary of Maeve's death? ‘So you love a dead girl more than you do me? Oh thats rich Spence, thanks’ and youd walk out of the apartment and wait for SPENCER, to send a fucking apology.

Whenever he talks about his mum or her mental state? ‘Spencer you won't inherit whatever it is that she has, skitzy whatever’ you say with a laugh.

The team could see how much Spencer hated it, he was always on edge of everything. What he hated the most was when you decided to surprise him at work, everyone could then see how uncomfortable he was with you next to him, not how a couple was supposed to work.

So, he messaged you, asked for a chat over coffee. And here you are at the first coffee shop you both met, you giggling at a little baby blowing spit bubbles.

“(Y/n), can we focus on why i brought us here?” Spencer asked softly, he was trying, and hoping to some god that you would try as well.

“Yeah in a sec Spence,” you cooed at the little baby again.

“(Y/n) please,” Spencer was now desperate.

“Okay okay, Jesus Christ I can't do anything without you breathing down my neck can i?” you asked annoyed as you sat in your chair properly rather than directing your full body to the baby.

“Me? Breathing down your neck?” Spencer asked suddenly.

“Duh, you always do, i can't go anywhere or do anything without you there to ask every question in the book-”

“No (Y/n) that person is you,” Spencer cut you off angrily.

“Don't cut me off, Spencie” you reminded the boy, that was the last straw. Spencer slammed his hand on the table in rage causing a few people around to jump and stare, not good.

“No, you listen to me (Y/n)” Spencer started, “don't you dare call me that. Don't ever call me Spencie, you know why?”

“Because some girl from prison called you that” you mocked as you took a sip of your drink.

“Exactly, wanna know why i don't like people calling me that?” you shrugged, “it's called PTSD (Y/n), or PTSS. It’s real. That abduction I went through? That fucking happened, i was taken for two days and was drugged and tortured,” you sighed.

“Spence you know how i feel about that-”

“Yeah? And have you ever thought about what i feel? Huh? Ever think why I get so jumpy around you? Because i'm a federal fucking agent, i see worse shit than you could ever dream. And forgive me, but I try my best to keep you away from that stuff because I don't want to scare you with it but at this point I don't care anymore. Maeve? She's real, she was real. She was the most amazing girl in the world and you know what? I never saw her a single fucking time until the day she died. A murder suicide. I wept for weeks and weeks, wanna know who was there for me?” Spencer held up his hand and started counting off on his fingers, “my teammates, my supervisor, my mother, the people in my favourite coffee shop and bookstore. THEY WERE CONCERNED FOR ME WHEN I STOPPED COMING IN FOR TWO WEEKS” Spencers voice raised slightly, not enough to shout but enough to get through to you, “i have PTSD, i have trauma; and it's not right for you to dismiss it like its nothing. And that includes my mother” and with that Spencer was done. He grabbed his wallet from his pocket, shoved a $5 bill on the table and started walking off, you took a moment to catch up before walking after him.

“Spence, what- what?” your brain couldn't keep up as Spencer walked out of the shop with you in tow.

“We’re over. Go home” Spencer said without looking at you.

“But, I love you!” you exclaimed, disheartened, hoping that last bit would help you, but Spencer kept walking.

“Then perish” was all you heard as he continued walking away, confidence radiating over him as he left you to your thoughts.

And honestly? Thinking back on everything.

He was fucking right.

[bausbitch]

I'm sorry

Reid x reader

ANGST AHAHA

Req but @blankets-for-bees

Warnings: kidnapping, established relationship, gunshot, Spencer being an ass at first, also this IS NOT really funny as my other works //read: I'll try because I'm just such a naturally good comedian,,,or a mental asylum escapee,,// 🤩 OH and a happy ending

Spencer had been,,,,

Awfully cold to you

For the last 6 months

Yeah, it was beginning to get on your nerves

It felt like living with a whole ghost 👻

And it wasn't like it was his work

You two had the same job for fucks sake

You even shared a home

But lately

Spencer would ONLY talk to you at work

And only when it was life or death

So basically when hotch paired you two up

And omg

The team

They had no idea

So they insisted you two sleep in the same room on this case

Bc you two are their fav couple!!!!!

But they didn't know that for the last six months

You were practically single

Except you couldn't go anywhere

And you wouldn't go out to flirt with people

Because you were a good s/o

*cough* unlike Spencer *cough*

Ok so this usub

The universe said

Fuck you, yn yln 🤩🤪🤡

This particular unsub

Kidnapped failing couples

And threw them in a house

A giant doll house

And sedated them

And played with them like dolls

And made them kiss and stuff

Like

Idk how to explain it

Like when you were little

And you didn't know you really LIKED liked girls

But you were always making your Frankie and ghoulia monster high dolls kiss in the first grade????

Or like

I think it's like ep 12 season 5

My best friend and I watched that one

Sigh

I miss her

Anyways

When you finally moved rooms

You walked in

And it felt like the weight of the world was lifted

Off of your shoulders

Don't worry the world is still pretty heavy

Issok though the world doesn't have to be a skinny legend

WAIT

This is supposed to be an angst

Ok

AHEM

Angsty angst angst

So you were like

Hell yeah

I'm gonna go chill in the jacuzzi

Then I'm gonna come back

And I'm gonna have a level head

Key words: come back

See, I don't think you have the facilities for that, big man

Okokok

So you were vibing in the jacuzzi

Then you saw Spencer

And

Gasp!

A woman that didn't look like any of the girls on the team was going into his room!!

You knew

You were being irrational

But you were like

Son of a bitch >:(

Alexa play jealousy by Monsta x

Anny. W. Ays

You went into the room

Or at least you knocked

And gasp

She answered

Ok

She seemed,,,

Suspicious

Probably bc she's the unsub yn you dumb bitch

And you were like

"Hey is Spencer in there?"

Like you WEREN'T his h*cking gf

And she straight up

PUNCHES YOU

Ok more like

Knocks you out with a blow to the face

And draws you inside

Ok now Spencers pov bc you're getting too much attention and he needs an explanation for making me play jealousy

Spencer

Oh god that I don't believe in how do I explain him

He was having a tough time

Ok wbk he's smart as hell

But when I comes to people who are FINE

Such as yourself

He gets a lil

*Patrick star from Spongebob noises*

So

Even if you guys had literally been dating for like

Five? Six? Years

He was starting to get scared

Bc

Ok so you guys had said the L world

You said it all the time

But

Spencer

He

He wanted to propose to you

Like

On one knee

Ring and everything

But he was scared

He was really really scared

Bc he wouldn't know what to do if you said no

Which

Why would you

You two were practically already married

You literally had a drunken, unofficial ceremony at Rossi's place one time

But he felt like

You wouldn't be ready

So he was like

Ok gotta set up a back up plan

If they reject me

And I have to go to work and see them

How do I not see them

How do I live without them?

Ah

I ignore them

😌

Plan: set

Spencer : fucking idiot

SO HE

He acted like you weren't there

And he eventually thought you were mad at him

Bc you weren't reaching out any more

Dumb bitch they think YOU'RE mad at them

Okokokok

Back to kidnapping

When he woke up

He was,,,,

*drum roll*

In a house?

A really nice house

Or at least the bedroom was nice

Or the roof of it

And what he could see from his peripheral vision

He could see you though

He could feel you

You were laying on his chest

Your arms around him

And he could tell you were still asleep

His serotonin levels went up higher than they had in months

Over the last six months he hadn't said a word

And he'd let you sleep on the couch

Smh and I thought he was a genius

But he missed you

But he had to make sure he was ready

To be honest

He probably knew what he was doing was irrational and the definition of idiotic

He also knew that by doing this he was maximising his chances of you not wanting to marry him

But he just

"Y'all hear smth?" -Spencer Reid, about his problems

Annie Oakley

Anyways

While he was too busy making heart eyes at your sleeping figure

Ya boy forgot to check if he could move

Turns out,,,,

He couldn't

Bc,,,,

*puts hands together like cat in the hat does*

This unsub, like I said before

SEDATED YOU TWO

So he waited

Until

The woman he unwillingly let into his hotel room, all by the service of a gun and a threat to his life 😄

Came and did whatever the fuck she was gonna do

Play with you guys more than my 6th grade crush played with my heart

And she did😋🥳🤩!!!!

But don't fret

She wasn't gonna hurt you

You had actually concluded the deaths were accidental

Just like me

Okoko so

She was strong

Like really fucking strong

Because she hauled both you and Spence

Into a little dining room

And served and fed you breakfast

You were connected to iv tubes

But still

But everything

The creepiest detail

According to me at least 💁✨

Was how all the food and everything

Were wood

Like

Toys for kids

Or something karuna satori would use in an asmr video

-

You woke up in the middle of,,,

Watching a movie on the couch with Spencer????

It was still daytime

Or so you thought

Bc the unsub pulled up

WITH A GUN

You don't have many things in life rn, but here's a list if things you do have, to cheer you up 😋

A lovely hole in your arm! V v useful for holding very small, thin, cups!!!

A v sad Spencer Reid! Comes with his own tears and despair!!! How fun!

And last but not least!

A wonderful speech from our sponsor!! //read: the unsub//

"Why must everything bad always happen to me! You two are very bad dolls! No one is a good doll, you're all useless and now I have to kill you >:("

Lmfao why does she sound like my bratty baby cousin

Anyways

"The FBI is at the door! Which one of you called them? You whore! It was probably you!"

First of all,,, how dare she

You didn't even THINK about other men in the 6 months your boyFRIEND ghosted you

So

Jokes on her

Second of all

You were bleeding out and Spencer was wiggling behind you

Probably a victory dance smh 😤

But then

GASP!!!

she went upstairs 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

And you heard voices

Morgan!!! Hotch!!! *insert police's name*!!

Then you passed out bc

💥bloodloss💥

And when you woke up

Spencer was fine

Physically

But he was hunched over

"Yn I'm so sorry. I love you so much and I was so scared I'd lose you if I proposed too early, and now I'm probably going to lose you without even saying a word. Honey I love you, I love you so much-"

And you were like

Hold up

LET GO OF MY HAND MF YOU MAY BE SKINNY BUT YOUR STRONG WTF

Then

"Did you say purpose?"

And he was like

"Yes(?) "

And you kissed him for the first time in sixth months

"Yes I'll marry, now let go of my hand"

[tomiokai]

Attempts || Spencer Reid

Masterlist

A/N: In this fic there are discussions on abuse, rape, and other explicit topics in toxic relationships. Please if you are in a relationship where you feel unsafe or you are getting abused, please, please, please ask for help/get some. Don’t stay in them, they will get worse! I’ve lost a friend because of a toxic relationship that she was in and that ended our friendship. 

Please don’t copy my works, but if you do want to use it as inspiration please give me credit, at least tag me. I do read a lot and when I see my ideas getting stolen and then turned into new stories it really hurts me.

Summary: After the kidnapping of Drew Luis the team sends Spencer to Y/n, the main suspect’s childhood home that has been abandoned for years to look for evidence to where she could be hiding, but instead of finding clues he finds y/n and  Y/n isn’t very happy about that. 

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Sick!Reader

Category: Angst. The tiniest bit of fluff towards the end. 

Warnings: ANGST.  Kidnapping. Blood. Abuse. Rape. Violence.  Cannibalism?? 

Word Count: 2.9k

_

“This is Drew Luis, male, 38, he went missing 8 days ago. Witnesses say they saw a woman around her mid 30’s drag a limp body into a grey car and drive off west of 874 Baker Valley. Virginia police have done their absolute best trying to find him but they have nothing.” JJ spoke loudly as she pulled up pictures of a man with blonde hair and brown eyes in his late 30s. 

“And get this, when police arrived at the house there showed no sign of struggle,” Garcia added as she scrolled through pictures taken of the house.

“Now we dug more into his personal life we discovered that he had a girlfriend that got hospitalized very regularly.” This time it was Hotchner that spoke. “Broken hand, fractured collar bone, you name it. 

“She was in an abusive relationship,” Spencer observed the injuries in the photo’s. 

Everyone in the room nodded simultaneously agreeing. 

“She’s our suspected unsub. She’s a female, 36, and her name is Y/n  Y/l/n, it makes sense because she lives at 874 Baker Valley and this probably means she’s finally taking action and getting her revenge.”  Derek spoke looking through her files. 

“To settle the score,” JJ spoke lowering her head. 

“Another thing you might want to know about her is that she was abused as a child when she was younger. So if you discover her parents missing too, you’d know why.” Rossi said a bit of humor hidden under the seriousness. 

Small chuckles could be heard on each end of the room, but with the clear of the throat from Hotch the team sealed their lips. 

“Okay Derek, Rossi, I want you to go to the house. JJ, Emily, and I will head to the police station. Reid, I want you to go to her childhood home to look for any clues that would lead us to where she is hiding and Garcia I want you to look through the street cameras and see if you can follow her or get a plate number. 

The team split up and all went their separate ways.  

-

“Is this how you like it Drew baby?” Y/n spoke in a whisper trailing her fingers down Drew’s dirty blood-covered chest then down his stomach that showed multiple cut wounds than to his crotch, cupping him through his bloodied pants. 

“Y/N YOU DON'T WANT TO DO THIS!” Drew pleaded his bruised hands struggling against the handcuffs that were restraining him. 

Yn’s hand stopped cupping him and balled up her hand into a fist and slammed down onto his crotch. “You bitch! Did I say you can talk back?” Y/n sneered spit flying out her mouth hitting Drew’s tear-stained face. 

Drew immediately shut up and turned his head away from y/n not wanting to look at her anymore. She was mental he had thought. Her hair was a nest, her clothes covered in his blood, and a wicked smirk on her cracked lips. 

“Look at me! Look at me! I want to see you in pain the way you saw me when you took my virginity when I didn’t consent!” 

“Is this what this whole ordeal is all about?” Drew asked, face clearly in pain. 

“No! This is about the last 8 years we have been together, you jackass! So many nights of you drunk and throwing me around like I’m a rag doll! Every time I try to leave you always threaten me! You took away my freedom! I can’t have friends and I can’t even see my FAMILY!” Y/n yelled tears running down her face. 

“I-I’m sorry!” Drew whimpered. 

“Sorry doesn’t make up for all the times you’ve hospitalized me!” She yelled, pulling out a knife from behind her.

“Then just hospitalize me too! I’ll let you and I’ll say it was just an accident. Please Y/n.” Drew begged panic surging through his body. 

y/n brought the knife up to his shoulder blades. “Oh no that won’t be needed. You see I was thinking by the end of today you’ll be buried.” Y/n peacefully chuckled. 

“You’re crazy Y/n! You’re mental I swear!” Drew shouted into Y/n’s face trying to move away as far away from her as possible.

The knife in y/n’s hands plunged into his shoulder and y/n laughed into the cold air of the basement coolness. “Oh I’m going to show you crazy.” Y/n whispered leaning down into his ear. y/n kissed his cheek softly before she twisted the blade in her hand. 

Screams erupted through the air as Y/n pulled out the knife painfully slow. She slowly brought the knife back up to her freshly made wound and plunged the knife back down into his arm, she dragged the knife down his arm cutting in a perfectly straight line down to the back of his hands. 

Tears were spilling out of Drew’s face yet again. “Y-Y/n listen to m-”.

“NO. I will not listen to you.” Y/n screamed shaking her head wildly. “I’m going to make you hurt so badly.” Y/n sneered her face in an angry form.  

Cry’s. 

“I’m going to cut your dirty, dirty fingers one by one and you’re going to eat them, one by one.” Y/n’s lips curled up in a small devilish smirk. 

“Think about this y/n. If you do this it’s a long, long jail sentence.” Drew breathed out, fear enveloped. 

“Do you think I don't know that?” Y/n asked. With that Y/n stood up and grabbed his right hand in the cuffs and with her other hand brought the knife up to his pinky and cut it off with one quick swipe. 

Thump. 

His pinky hit the concrete floor and blood splattered everywhere, Drew let out a blood-curdling scream and yanked his wrists away from y/n. 

Y/n bent down to pick up his right pinky and raised it to her face, turning it around in her fingers inspecting it. A small smile grin crept up to her lips as she lowered the pinky to Drew’s lips. 

“Ah. Drew. Open up that dirty mouth of yours.” Y/n sang. 

Drew turned away from her and shut his mouth tight. 

Y/n grabbed his chin with her free hand and yanked it so that they were face to face. “I said, AH!”

Drew just stayed put shaking his head. 

Y/n let go of his chin and raised her hand. In one swift move y/n brought her hand back onto his cheek with a loud slap. “Open up you ass!” Y/n yelled.

Very slowly Drew opened his mouth not wanting any of his own fingers in his mouth.

As soon as his mouth was all the way open y/n shoved his own pinky into his mouth. “Chew.” Y/n instructed. 

Drew hesitantly chewed on his own pinky, flesh, meat, bones. Blood overflowed his own mouth as the crunches of his own bones could be heard. The taste of metallic metal numbing his tongue. 

“Now swallow.” Y/n breathed. 

-

Spencer walked around the abandoned house, looking through childhood photos sitting on the mantelpiece for any clues that would lead to where she is hiding. Without any luck Spencer continued onto the kitchen. 

The first thing he noticed was dirty dishes. The wheels in his head turned immediately.  He walked over to the dishes and knew for sure that those dishes were fresh. Spencer looked over at the fridge and walked over and threw the door open. His eyes scanned around the fridge looking for a sign of freshness. Milk. That was it his suspicions were confirmed. They were somewhere in the house. 

Spencer drew out his gun and held it in position. He went out of the kitchen and into the long hallway. He kicked open each and every door. The master bedroom, bathroom, coat closets, leaving only the last door at the end of the hallway. With one kick the bedroom door bursts open. Inside is what looked like a little girl's room. Pink walls, dolls, stuffies, and drawings of fairies. Spencer neared the bed and scanned it. In his mind he knew that the bed had been recently slept in. 

“Hotch?” Spencer whispered into his earpiece. 

“Yeah Reid what do you have?” Hotch's voice came.

“She’s here. Send back up.” Reid spoke walking out the bedroom. 

Basement. 

That’s where he was heading next.  Spencer walked down the steps to the basement and stopped at the door, listening. 

Cry’s and muffled voices can be heard from the other side. Spencer couldn’t believe the police didn’t check the basement of her childhood home. Idiots.

Spencer grabbed the doorknob and turned it very slowly and opened it a smidge. He peered through the crack and what he saw was a disaster. Drew was sitting against the back wall while his hands were above him handcuffed to water pipes, blood trailing down his shoulders and a long cut running up his arm to his hand. His right hand was missing all its fingers and just looked as if it was just a bloody nub attached to his hand. Spencer turned his head away needing a break from the sight. 

He turned back around to stare at the girls back. From behind she looked like a complete totaled mess. Her hair was everywhere and her clothes drenched in bright red blood presumably Drew’s. 

Spencer quietly pushed the door the rest of the way with his gun drawn. He was now closing in on y/n. His plan: to grab her hands before she could do anything. 

“Oh my god, thank god please save me from this psychotic woman!” Drew screamed at Spencer. 

‘Fuck his cover had been blown.’ Spencer had thought with a groan. 

Y/n’s head snapped to Spencer with a rage in her eyes. In eye blinking speed y/n dropped her knife and switched it for a revolver that hung from her belt. 

Two guns pointed at each other. It was going to end only one way and they both knew that. 

“Y/n listen to me drop the gun.” Spencer calmly said. 

“Why would I do that!” Y/n shouted backing away into the wall. 

“Y/n I know what you have been through. I’ll help you, I’ll make sure they don’t hurt you. Okay? But that’s only if you listen and slide me your gun.” Spencer responded. 

“What’s the point!” Y/n cried tears spilling out of her eyes. “You're lying, I’m going to jail anyway!”

“No you won’t as long as Drew is still alive and you have a good lawyer you won’t go to jail. You’re sick Y/n.” Spencer spoke. 

“It doesn’t matter! All I ever get is being pushed around and abused. My dad, my mom, DREW, and everyone. I have no friends or anything!” Y/n cried her whole body trembling. y/n cried her hands swiping away her hot tears.

“I’m here okay? I understand how you feel. I’ll be with you every step of the way if you just listen to me. “ Spencer explained.

Y/n’s eyes drifted to Spencer’s face and back to the gun. She lowered the gun to her side and dropped the gun by her feet and pulled out a key and showed it to Spencer. “Let me uncuff him.” Y/n spoke. 

Spencer nodded as y/n turned around to uncuff Drew, Spencer slowly walked forward and kicked the revolver behind him and backed up again. 

Y/n uncuffed Drew and Drew immediately ran to hide behind Spencer. 

Y/n pulled her hands above her head and turned around slowly to face Spencer. “Shoot me.” she whispered. 

Spencer looked at her in shock, taken aback. “No, I’m not going to do that.” Spencer's voice came. 

“P-please. I have nothing to lose.” Y/n’s voice cracked. 

“Y/n please, deep breat-.”

A bullet flew past Spencer’s ear and hit Y/n in the shoulder. Y/n looked down to her shoulder and back up to Drew. He had the gun pointed at her with rage in his eyes, he pulled the trigger with what was left of his left hand. y/n’s legs gave out from under her and she dropped to the floor all the energy leaving her body.

Spencer whipped around and grabbed the gun out of Drew’s hands and flipped Drew back around with his hands behind his back and cuffed them again. 

“Hotch I need two ambulances NOW!” Spencer yelled into his microphone.

“Okay got it, we’re almost there.” Hotch responded.  

“Make sure you withdraw all guns. Y/n has been shot and Drew is handcuffed with all his right fingers missing.”  Spencer spoke. 

“Why did you do that?” Spencer yelled at Drew.

“The crazy bitch wanted to be  shot and if you weren’t going to do it I was.” Drew breathed out. 

Spencer shook his head at Drew and went over to y/n to check her pulse. Still there. He lifted her into his arms bridal style and started walking back up the stairs. 

Spencer looked back at Drew and said “Follow and don’t try anything.” and turned back around. 

Outside was bright and sunny, warm air surrounded the street as ambulances and police cars could be heard. When the heads of Spencer and Drew were seen Hotch and the team immediately jumped out of their SUV’s. 

“Take Drew, he shot Y/n when she already surrendered.” Spencer spoke with disgust in his voice. 

Derek took no time to waste and grabbed Drew and hauled him to the first ambulance while Spencer explained to the team what had happened and brought y/n to the second ambulance. 

“Hotch could you please try your best to clear Y/n’s name. She didn’t actually kill the boyfriend and actually let him go. She was abused and she’s sick. I promised her that I won’t let her go to prison.” Spencer whispered to Hotch. 

“I’ll see what I can do. With her side of the story she has a strong chance of avoiding prison, but we’ll have to see. We might have to pull some strings, but for your sake I’ll try my best.” Hotch responded as Spencer hopped into the ambulance with Y/n.

-

Bright lights. Those were the first things Y/n had seen as she opened her eyes.  

“You’re awake!” Someone to her right said with a joy-filled voice. 

Y/n turned her head to see that it was Spencer, the one who had refused to shoot her. 

“Why didn’t you kill me.” Y/n asked in a hushed whisper. 

“You deserved to live Y/n. Your whole life you were abused, you didn’t know anything else. I wanted to help you.” Spencer answered, taking her hand into his. 

“But I’m still in trouble.” She spoke. 

“Your hearing is in a week but Hotch, my boss I guess, says that you have a pretty good chance of avoiding prison time, but you’ll need to attend counseling,” Spencer reassured her, gripping her hand tighter. 

“What about Drew?” Y/n asked fear laced in her voice. 

“Drew has a long record of assaults, rape, and domestic abuse. If I’m not wrong he’ll be the one going to prison.” Spencer answered calmly. 

Y/n instantly relaxed and signed in relief. Then she spoke again, “why do you care about me?”

Spencer looked shocked for a moment then answered, “I know how you feel, and I want to make sure you get your justice and help, then I want to be able to show you all the things you can live up to.” He lowered his head to her hand and kissed the back of it. 

“Thank you.” Y/n whispered.

-

3 years later. 

Y/n moved on from the events that had happened in her childhood home, never forgotten but never mentioned. She was free of charge of anything that had happened and is living a happy life with Spencer now. 

8 months after she had been released from under house arrest, Spencer had taken y/n out and from then their relationship with each other bloomed. They got engaged with each other after 9 months of dating, got married on Halloween, and moved on to have a beautiful set of twins. Lily and Zach Reid. They may only be 19 months old but they have already developed the brains of their father. 

Y/n was happy at last, she felt safe with her family, and she had made a whole bunch of new friends, her life had finally turned around.

[thorne93]

Inside the Criminal Mind (Part 37)

Prompt: You’re married to Dr. Spencer Reid of the BAU, and are a distinguished doctor yourself on the team. You’re sent down to Miami, Florida for teaching and as a side request from the FBI, to investigate a string of missing persons. When you think you’ve figured out who the unsub is, your life becomes more complicated than you ever could’ve imagined.

Word Count: 2604

Warnings: (throughout the fic –>) death, blood, gore, killings, language, disturbing mental notions, mentions of rapes/murder/etc (You know, Dexter and Criminal Minds related business)

Notes: Thank you so much to @arrow-guy​​​​​​​​, @carryonmyswansong​​​​​​​​, and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​​​​​​​ - without each of you, I couldn’t have finished, written, or properly navigated this story. Each of you helped me fish out details that were incredibly important to me. Beta’d by @carryonmyswansong​​​​​​​​ and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​​​​​​​… Aesthetic by @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​​​​​​​

This is a crossover of Criminal Minds x Dexter. First time writing Dexter.

Also, the timeline is after Season 1 of Dexter, but during season 14-ish of Criminal minds into Season 15. Enjoy!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

You watched your husband and Cat put on skates and go out to the rink and for a long while they just skated, saying nothing. Spencer couldn't skate at all, and Cat was skating all over the place. She caught up to him and held onto his arm to help him skate and you watched from the side with burning in your eyes and stomach. 

It’s a very good thing Dexter taught you to keep your emotions in check. You’d been here before though. Jealous. First with JJ, and it took a long time for s Spencer to convince you there was nothing there. Then with Max, and that had yet to be addressed, and now, a psychotic killer was wheeling your husband around a rink and he was actually smiling.  

Why is it when Cat Adams takes him on a random date, he can smile and have fun, knowing the hell she put him through. But you and him were at each other’s throats for months when he found out you were a killer. You were his wife. The love for you should’ve shone through everything else. 

So what was the difference? Could he not forgive you for the lying? You knew he was jealous of Dexter but now… Now he’d had three women that made you question your entire marriage in the course of half a year. You had been nothing but open and honest about your entire relationship with Dexter since he found out.

Did he really not see how any of this would affect you? The constant attention given to max/ The slight flirting he was doing with Cat? He didn’t have to flirt. Cat knew it, you knew it, Spencer knew it. He just had to play the game -- he didn’t have to enjoy it. 

Cat mentioned that if you weren’t here, she’d request a song from the DJ and make out with Spencer right now. They skated some more and she acknowledged that Spencer would try to get inside her head, so he asked about her baby. She said she didn’t want to talk about it. He said he was trying to use the hormonal effect against her. 

“Oh, really? Um, waht about sex?” She skated towards him and wrapped her arms around his neck, he wrapped his hands around her waist, and you stiffened. “Why don’t you use that against me?” 

Real date or not, it’s never a pretty sight to see your husband that close to another woman. 

She slightly pushed away from him and he had trouble staying upright. She made a face of disgust and slapped him so hard that he fell over. 

Your eyes went wide with rage. She skated over to where you were, trying to skate past you, but you grabbed her hand in a swift motion, almost too fast for anyone to see and you bent her hand backwards, threatening to break her wrist.

“If you ever touch my husband again, I will kill you. And my method won’t be as humane as a needle in the arm,”  you darkly vowed as she bent backwards, wincing. “Are we clear?”

“Jeez, you weren’t this jealous last time,” she responded.

In the background, you could hear Spencer and Luke shouting your name. 

“Y/N! Y/N!” Spencer cried out, skating towards you.

You applied more pressure, any more and her wrist would fracture. She was nearly on one knee by now from the way you were pushing. 

“Are we clear?” you asked again. 

“Yes!” 

You released her and stood straight up again as Spencer skated over to you. He gave you a look of anger but you returned it to him. 

He spent the next few minutes talking to her, telling her how he couldn’t get her out of his mind and you wanted to roll your eyes. She asked if Spencer thought about her when he kissed you and he said sometimes. The next thing she wanted was to see where you two lived so blissfully happily. 

So, within a matter of seconds, everyone was loaded up into the SWAT van and everyone went over to your home. Spencer got out his keys and started to unlock the door before she stopped him.

“Did you really mean what you said?” she asked. 

“”Yes.” 

“Prove it,” she ordered and you just rolled your eyes. He’d refuse. You knew he would. 

But faster than you could blink, Spencer’s hands went to her hair and his mouth collided with hers. Your eyes went wide in shock as your stomach dropped. Fake or not, your husband was kissing another woman, in front of you, on your porch. He was kissing her hungrily, in a way he hadn’t kissed you in a long time. 

Luke glanced at you, gauging your reaction, seeing as just a few minutes ago you nearly broke her wrist and threatened to end her life. You couldn’t watch, but you couldn’t look away. 

She swung your front door open to reveal a woman in your house and you frowned. 

What the hell was this?

Spencer and Cat broke apart and you looked at them, then looked at the girl. 

“Max, what are you doing here?” Spencer breathed.

Of course it was fucking Max inside your house. Of course this day was going to get worse and worse. 

Luke ordered that someone get Max out of here but Max said, “No, no, no, she’ll kill them if I leave.”

“Kill who?” you asked as you stepped inside the foyer of your home. 

“My father and my sister. Look I got a call from some woman with my sister screaming in the background. I was told to come here, that there would be a key taped underneath the porch swing. Spencer, what is happening?!””

“We recovered your father, but your sister is still missing. Look I say we put cat in her cell and we regroup,” Luke suggested

“No. Bring her in here and leave us alone,” Spencer quietly ordered. He then set it up so that the team would hear all of you the entire time, instructed Max on what not to say, and they let Cat come back in. 

Fantastic. You were in your home with a woman that was monopolizing your husband’s time and a psychotic killer that was obsessed with him. 

“We’re all here, what do you want to talk about?” Spencer demanded as she walked in. 

“So, so much.” She eyed Max and said, “She’s cute. I see why she turned your head away from your wife.” 

“What are you talking about?” Spencer asked as she walked in your home, touching things and looking at the art and decor. 

“You’re married?” Max asked as if she didn’t know and your face whipped to Spencer. You were dying to know why that would be a bit of news to Max. 

Finally, she stopped walking and turned to you. “Did it make you mad that I was kissing your husband?” 

“No.” 

“Why not? You nearly broke my arm for slapping him. Is he free real estate? Speaking of which, he kissed me, so you can’t kill me.” 

“No, but I’d hope you’re not stupid enough to think the kiss was real.” You cocked your head. 

“Are you going to hurt my sister?” Max suddenly asked, taking a step forward

“No. Not if she follows instructions. It could be a learning experience for her.” After a moment, everyone got settled in in your living room. “Normally Spencie and I, we play games, but tonight, I’ve brought you all here to make a point. Y/N, you should know the truth about your husband.” 

“I already know everything there is to know about my husband,” you evenly said. 

“Oh, really? Did you get the mail today?” 

“Yes, why?” 

“Go check your mail.”

You got up and looked and found an envelope that was addressed your name, but no address or return address.  

“Open it,” Cat ordered. 

You peered at her, wondering what the game was. You opened it, and a stack full of photos came out. One was a picture of Spencer carrying Max through a sprinkler system at the park. Another was the two of them laughing over coffee. Another was her hand on his in a booth at a restaurant. 

“So? I knew they were spending time together,” you asked, throwing the photos on the coffee table as you looked down at Cat. 

“You knew how much, but you didn’t know how. Does that look friendly to you or flirty? Not to mention Max here didn’t even know he was married. Hid the wedding ring and then never mentioned you. How does that make you feel?” she pressed. 

“Fine. That doesn’t mean anything. I never came up. He tries to avoid talking about work, and I’m part of his work.”

“Don’t be blind, Y/N, you’ve never been stupid, dont’ start nowy. It’s not a cute look. Not mentioning his work is one thing, but you, his wife? Hmm, it appears our spencie has been a naughty boy.” 

“He isn’t ‘our’ anything.”

“Sure he is. Just because I didn’t get a picture of him kissing Max over here doesn't mean it hasn’t happened or that it won’t. He kissed me without hesitation to save her family.”

“He did that to save two people, it doesn’t matter who they are.” 

“But it does. See, I know the real Dr. Reid. He’s not this bookish genius that saves the day and has all the answers.”

“Oh, yeah? Who’s the real me, Cat?” Spencer prompted. 

“The real Spencer Reid throws women against walls, and hisses that he’s going to kill them,” Cat said. 

“That was a very different situation,” Spencer said. 

“No it wasn’t.” 

“What’s she talking about?” Max asked. 

“Why don’t you explain it? She won’t believe it coming from me,” Cat said. 

“Two years ago Cat kidnapped my mother. Just like tonight, she got under my skin, and--.”

“You threw her against a wall?” Max asked, clearly appalled. 

“Don’t skimp on the details, Spencie,” Cat instructed as she paced around. “She should  know everything, as your mistress.” 

“I’m not his mistress,” Max responded. 

“She was pregnant at the time, and I knew that when I hurt her.” 

“And, the next day, I miscarried. The end.” 

“That’s not true,” Spencer retorted quickly, a look of concern washing over him. 

Oh, he was concerned Cat miscarried, but not about him committing infidelity. Nice to know where you stood. 

“It most certainly is true. Check my medical records. So now you both see. Max, you see that Dr. Reid is actually a lot darker than you thought. He’s married, he’s a liar, and a cheat--”

“I never cheated,” Spencer corrected quickly.

“No, but you thought about it and you didn’t think twice about kissing me to prove a point.” 

“What is this?” Max asked, jumping up. “What is this sick twisted game you three are playing?” 

“Okay, fine,” you said, your voice hard. “You want to break up my marriage with vague photos, fine, but why take Max’s family. What do they have to do with this?”

“Because I want to show everyone what happens if you involve yourself with Spencer Reid. See, Maxine here should know that this is what life is like for anyone who knows him.”

“So why not abduct me?” you challenged. 

“You’re already married, it’s too late to show you anything new, except what he’s done with Max here. You should be thanking me, Y/N. No woman will want to get near Dr. Reid.”

“Thanking you? You’ve put two innocent people's lives in danger,” you responded, your teeth gritting together. 

“You’re being very ungrateful. I’m saving Maxie from the inevitable danger she’ll get in with Spencie and I’m trying to show you that he’s just like every other scumbag guy out there. He’s out for himself and that’s it.” 

“I can't believe you didn’t tell me you were married,” Max responded, clearly upset and now you realized you had a reason to be too. What had they done that would cause concern for being around a married man? 

“See? Men are pigs,” Cat spat as she kneeled in front of Max. “You’ve been hurt before like this. Been the other woman. Tell me about it. I could have little sis and Juliette go over to his place and take care of him.” 

“Just give her what she wants,” Spencer encouraged. 

“He’s just saying that so I’ll call and they can trace it.” 

Max jumped up, ended the landline phone call that was keeping the team in contact, and begged Cat to get confirmation her sister was alive. But Cat insisted on a name and a story first. So Maxine started in on a story about a man she knew that made her feel special, made her feel like she was on top of the world, only to find out he was married with two kids. So when she confronted him, he got violent, and she hit him over the head with a vase that killed him. She told 911 it was self defense, but she went there looking for a fight, a way to hurt him. 

Cat entered the phone number, the text, and everyone waited on confirmation that her sister was alive. She said, “See? There, now everyone is miserable. Maxine is right back to being the other woman. Spencer has broken two women’s hearts. Better than their neck though, right Spencie? And Y/N sees her husband as the cheating, lying, psycho he is. I mean, in one night, we’ve determined he could kiss me easily, on your front porch no less, and with Maxine here…” She shook her head before looking down. “Oh look. Proof sis is alive.” 

Maxine grabbed the phone and dashed out of your house and showed your team the photo. You and Spencer didn’t speak as Cat was reloaded into the SWAT van and you drove to the prison. 

“Do you know why I did this? Why I really did this?” Cat asked. 

“To prove I’m a monster, just like you,” Spencer said, his eyes meeting yours from across the van. 

“No, silly,” Cat retorted before resting her head on his shoulder. “I just wanted to see you again.”

Your eyes flashed with pain and heartbreak as you stared at her. 

“You ruined my marriage and the only friendship I’ve had in a long time, just to see me? You could’ve just written me a letter.”

“Would you have written back?” she asked. 

He didn’t respond and the rest of the ride was silent until you reached the prison. They oepned the doors, and began to unload Cat. 

“You know, just because those pictures didn’t show Spencer kissing Max, it doesn’t mean he wasn’t cheating,” Cat said as she got out of the van. 

You frowned as you said, “What do you mean? Of course it does. If you couldn’t get one picture of them being physical--”

“Don’t forget who your husband is, Y/N. His love language isn’t physicality. It’s books...poems...museums… He’s a lover of the mind. You might want to ask Maxine just how many gifts she got from Spencie here.” She glanced at Spencer before looking to you again. “It’s been a real pleasure. It’s too bad I won’t be there to see the divorce finalize. Best date ever.” She gave you her signature crazy look, and then they walked her away. 

It was only you and Spencer in the back of the SWAT van now. 

“Y/N,” he started softly. 

“Don’t,” you warned through gritted teeth.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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[hotchscotchh]

Reimagined; Chapter 12 - Arthur Rykov

This time it feels like an ending and it kind of is. This will be the last chapter before the epilogue! I want to get sappy, but I’ll save it for the next chapter. I have ideas for my next multi-chapter fic, but I think I want to do a rewrite of this first. I love the storyline, but the first few chapters are…. Not Good. Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

Summary: I told you I have a soft spot for team finds out fics…

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Spencer Reid

Warnings: ANGST, fluff, mentions of NSFW

Word count: 2.1k

Chapter 11 —— epilogue

Read on AO3

Based on 8x3 Through the Looking Glass

Spencer had thought this case would be hard on Aaron, but it turns out it was worse for himself. He was the one who had to sit through the closing interview with the Acklin’s. He had to hear every single detail of what happened to them. He had to sift through every single one of their insecurities and wrong doings. Analyze why the unsub had chosen this family based on their specific “sins.” The thought of their actions being referred to as sins was what was hurting him the most. He knew, reasonably, that Tobias Hankel had kidnapped him as a kind of victim of opportunity and because Spencer was and is an FBI agent, but he’s always wondered if there was some way for some people to see your sins written on you. He knows he isn’t a sinner (he doesn’t believe in God, how can he be?), but sometimes irrational thoughts even get the best of geniuses.

The so called “sin” that held the most weight on him was institutionalizing his mother. He would never forgive himself for the way things went when it happened. He knew it needed to be done, that it was what was best for her. He couldn’t take care of her, and she couldn’t take care of herself. He will always feel selfish for it, though. For the way he just had the men from the Bennington invade her home and take her from it. He should’ve told her it was happening. Given her some kind of warning. But who knows if that would have been any better? It was too late to do anything to change it now.

Aaron noticed on the jet ride home that Spencer was much quieter and more reserved than usual (meaning he just wasn’t talking at all). They hadn’t told the team yet and Aaron knew he couldn’t just scoop the young man into his arms right now and try to make it all better, so he settled into the chair next to Spencer, handing him a book to at least give his hands something to do, and settling a firm hand on Spencer’s knee under the table.

They stayed silent the entire ride home and until they made it to the car. Aaron had told the team to go home and not come in the next day just before deplaning, so they were set to go home. So far, no one had questioned their sudden carpooling. No one had mentioned seeing anything at JJ’s wedding. Aaron couldn’t help but wonder if they knew more than they were letting on.

Once both were seated in the car, Aaron reached over and pulled Spencer into an awkward hug over the center console. Spencer immediately buried his face in Aaron’s neck and hugged him back, his arms slipping up underneath Aaron’s armpits.

“Thank you,” he managed to get out, though it sounded hoarse.

“Jack is still with Jessica. Do you need a meeting, or do you just want to order dinner and go home?” Aaron asked, softly.

Spencer sniffed and pulled back. “Home, please.” They’d been back together for almost five months now, and Spencer had almost completely moved into Aaron’s recently bought house. He’d started bonding with Jack, something he’d never had a chance to do before.

Aaron nodded and decided not to bring up what was wrong until they got there. After driving for a few minutes, Aaron thought he would try and bring up something he had been thinking about for a while now, something that might take Spencer’s mind off of whatever was going on up in that big brain of his. “Do you want to tell the team? About us?”

Spencer looked over at him before smiling and turning back to look at his hands which were neatly folded in his lap. “Alex knows. She asked about it just before the case in Seattle; I wasn’t going to lie to her. She’d have seen right through it anyway. I don’t think anyone is going to be upset. Maybe we could have a team dinner and make the announcement away from work.”

Aaron was taken aback. He wasn’t surprised that Blake knew, she had known the both of them for a long time, but he was surprised and how much it seemed Spencer had thought about this already. “Okay, that sounds good. I’ll call everyone in the morning and see if they’re free tomorrow night. We can sleep in and still have time to go grocery shopping. I don’t know about you, but I’m anxious to get this over with.”

Spencer nodded. “Thai?” he asked, grinning and already punching the number into his phone.

----

After they had eaten, Aaron put some home improvement show on the TV, but neither of them were really paying attention. Spencer had curled into Aaron’s’ side, his hand soon finding the younger man’s hair. “Do you want to tell me what’s bothering you, babe?”

Spencer sighed. “Just feeling guilty, I guess. About my mom. I know I had to do it, but that doesn’t stop the guilt.”

Aaron wasn’t sure what he could say to make Spencer feel better, so he changed the course of the conversation a little. “Does she know about us?” He felt Spencer nod into his side. “I’d love to meet her someday.”

Spencer sat up and moved his had to Aaron’s cheek. He had a look on his face that Aaron had never seen before. “I’d love for you to meet her. I think she’d love you. I know I do,” he answered, placing a soft kiss on Aaron’s lips.

----

The next morning found them making breakfast together after a satisfying round of shower sex. Spencer was leaning back against the island watching Aaron begin to crack eggs into a frying pan. “Aaron, why don’t you go start calling the team? I’ll watch the eggs.” Aaron turned around and kissed Spencer before handing him the spatula, nodding, and walking off to find his phone.

Two miraculous things happened that morning. One: Spencer didn’t burn the eggs. Two: all of the team members were available, and they all offered to bring drinks, deserts, sides, etc., meaning Aaron and Spencer only had to worry about setting up the back yard and getting meat. They had to pick up Jack at 11, so they left at 10 to run to the grocery store, giving them plenty of time.

Arriving to pick Jack up, no matter where he was staying, was always an ordeal. Today, he burst through Jessica’s front door before the pair could even fully get out of the car. “Dad! Spence! I missed you!”

Spencer reached him first, crouching down and accepting Jack’s hug. “Hi, Jack! I missed you too!”

He quickly moved away from Spencer and over to his father, repeating the ritual. “Okay, Jack, let’s go say goodbye to Aunt Jess and get going,” Aaron said, anxious to start setting things up. The family made their way to Jessica’s door where she stood waiting. They kept their interaction brief today, mostly consisting of thank yous and I love yous. Aaron was glad he didn’t have to hide his relationship from Jack and Jessica. They had been very open about everything from the beginning. When it was time to leave, Aaron pushed Jack and Spencer towards the car to have a moment alone with Jessica.

“Thank you again, Jess. For watching Jack and for supporting our relationship. Having your support means a lot to me. I wanted to let you know we’re telling the team tonight.”

Jessica gave a sad smile. “Of course you’d have my support Aaron. And don’t be anxious about the team. They’ll be happy that you’re happy,” she finished, pulling Aaron into a strong hug.

----

Five o’clock found Spencer and Aaron rushing to set a few last-minute things up, working around an overly excited Jack. Spencer stopped in the middle of setting out plates on the table. He wiped a hand down his face.

“Aaron,” he called out. “I need a minute. I’ll be inside.”

Aaron was working at the grill, making sure the propane was full and turned on, but stopped and turned when Spencer started speaking. “Okay, Spence.” Aaron wasn’t sure what was wrong, but seeing his lover running inside his house looking like he was about to pass out wasn’t something he could ignore.

He made his way inside. “Spencer?” he called out, closing the door behind him and making his way towards the living room. There he found Spencer sitting on the edge of the couch, his head in his hands, Jack’s pleas of “Spence, what’s wrong?” being answered only with “not right now, Jack.”

“Jack, why don’t you go play in your room for a little bit? I’ll come get you soon,” Aaron said quietly, pushing Jack towards the doorway. Jack nodded and walked off, the concerned look not leaving his face. Aaron came back to Spencer, kneeling on the floor in front of him and peeling his hands away from his face to reveal tear-stained cheeks. “Oh, baby, what’s going on?”

Spencer sniffed and let out a laugh that probably (definitely) made him sound a little hysterical. “I, uh, I don’t know. Just nervous, I guess. It’s irrational. They all probably already know anyway, they’re profilers for fuck’s sake. Why the hell am I so nervous?” Spencer stood up then, his hands rising to his temples as he paced the room. Aaron moved to sit on the couch.

“How are we going to do this?” Aaron asked. They hadn’t talked about it yet. “Do you want to make a formal announcement, or just, I don’t know, maybe act like we usually do around each other and see how long it takes for someone to say something?”

Thinking rationally always calmed Spencer down, even if only for a little while. He stopped pacing and sat on the couch next to Aaron. “Both? How about we just act normally until we sit down for dinner and make some kind of announcement then?”

Aaron smiled. “That sounds good, baby. Why don’t you go get Jack and we’ll finish setting up? They’ll be here soon.”

----

Six o’clock had them sitting down for dinner. Everyone had arrived all around the same time. Spencer and Jack stayed at the door to greet them while Aaron stayed in the backyard, working on the meat. So far, the pair had been using each other’s first names, giving casual touches. No one had questioned that yet. Nor had they questioned Spencer greeting them at the door, which led him to the conclusion that they all knew.

Sitting down, though, knowing what announcement they were about to make, his hands were shaking. They decided Spencer should be the one to tell them, as some people could claim that Aaron holding Spencer’s job over him. They knew the team would never do that, but Spencer couldn’t help being anxious over it.

Everyone had gotten their plates and settled into casual conversation. Spencer cleared his throat and started, “Um, everyone, I’d like to say something.” He paused, waiting for the chatter to die down and everyone to turn their attention towards him. “I, uh, I’m pretty sure you all know this already, but, um, well, Aaron and I are in a relationship,” he finally managed to stutter out.

There was radio silence for a few moments before Rossi started laughing. “Did you think you were being subtle about it?”

JJ spoke up after that. “Yeah, we all know, Spence. We’re not mad, we’re glad the two of you are happy. I don’t think I’ve ever seen the pair of you smile as much as you have in the past few months. Has it been going on longer than that?”

Spencer took a few moments to process that before settling back into his seat and leaning into Aaron, smiling. “Well, technically yes. We had a, uh, fling I guess, a few years ago. Before… everything.”

Everyone but Rossi and Morgan looked surprised at that. “Spencer Reid?” Garcia piped up, giggling. “A fling?” Everyone burst into laughter after that, the small amount of tension in the air quickly diffusing.

The night went on as every team dinner did, laughing and horsing around. Talking about anything that didn’t have to do with work. When it came time for everyone to leave, Morgan pulled Spencer off to the side. “I’m proud of you, man. You deserve this. Happiness. But I’ve been missing our guy time!”

“Thank you, Morgan. I don’t think you understand how much I appreciate your support,” Spencer answered, a grin on his face. “I’ll come over this weekend, case permitting, of course.”

That night, when the family of three were alone again, cuddled on the couch watching some Disney movie that Jack liked, Spencer realized that he didn’t think he could ever be happier.

Taglist: @wheelsup @endingsbeginnings

[exoruinmykokoro-blog]

Imagine being the unsub while you are in a relationship with

The unsub was a special one. This time it was genderles and the reason that trigger the rage of it kills was also unknown. The whole team has passed days and nights in the FBI quarters creating theories and thinking about the origins of an unknown killer that, for the first time, was more smart than everyone. Even Spencer Reid and Penelope Garcia, the gems of the team.

- HI.. I am looking for… him – a girl with black hair with purple dots all over it and a cute white dress appeared in the bureo at three in the morning while Spencer look right at the door being followed by the eyes of everyone in the table.

- -excuse me- he said while standing up and walking outside taking everyone attention with him, being followed by the eyes of the team while the mysterious girl who passed the controls of security jumped right into his arms kissing his lips.

- Holy Mother fucking shit…. Sorry sir… - Penelope said while everyone keep looking at the scene as Spencer cheeks took the red color of the blood that the team was used to see on their victims. He took the hand of the girl taking her out of the scene while everyone looked at each other other with the same face of perplexity and shock. – Im sorry for…

- I think you expressed perfectly what was in our head Garcia – Hotch said by the surprise of the team while he looked at Morgan with intrigued eyes. – how long?

Then, the whole attention of the team was putted on Morgan while he shaked his head looking at everyone disagree and disapproval, even the face of betray on Penelope.

-okay… stop looking at me like I am the criminal baby girl… - Morgan said while grabbing his cup of hot americano. – I think it has been like… what? A year ?

-what are you doing here? – Spencer looked into her eyes while she took a long breath taking her cigarrerts out of her coat. – you can’t smoke here.

- but I can smoke in the interrogation room… can I? – Spencer felt a weird felling, followed by the case that was about to drive the team mad. 15 sexual pedophiles has being found being dead in different states, with different states of decompose and different wounds. Apparently, they were kidnapped in groups of three and they were obligated to torture and kill each other in an period of three months. Video tapes were found with the bodies and they will have confessed crimes that not even the police where able to pull out.

It was a heroe for the parents, a vigilante for others, and a blessing for communities. But still a serial killer. And a really really…

-it was all for your plan? – she smiled at him shaking her head – it was you all this time… - Spencer voice cracked while he saw her eyes started to trow tears while she was still smiling at him. He felt lost, broken, sensitive and vulnerable. He was besides a killer, an unsub that he loved.

-The love I feel for you were, was and is never gonna be a part of a plan… you know why I did it Spence… but you need a push to see me. – she said to him as she felt his gripping getting more strong against her arm and taking her into the interrogation room.

[poppyclark]

The New “Kid” -  Part Two

Team X Reader Word Count: 1,036 Summary: The beloved team member, you, is kidnapped by the unsub. The team tries their best to get you and the other hostages back before it’s too late. Requested: Yes, @awkwardcandyghost Warnings: Kidnapping

Spencer’s POV:

“Guys!” I heard Rossi yell. 

The team rushed into the woods and saw Rossi alone, “Where’s Y/N?” I asked.

“I-I don’t know! He took off before I could see him.” Rossi admitted.

“Are you serious?” I yelled.

“This could’ve happened with any one of us, Reid.” JJ reminded me.

“No, I wouldn’t of let this happen. No matter what, our main goal is keeping her safe. She’s a high school student!” I pointed out. I could hear myself yelling but I couldn’t stop.

“What matters right now is getting her back, not putting the blame on Dave.” Hotch reminded us.

We all nodded and got back in our cars. I drove silently as Hotch and JJ speculated Y/N’s whereabouts.

Hours passed, Penelope’s fingers ached from how much she typed but she continued as tears streamed down her face. I stood pacing in her lair as Morgan attempted to calm her down, “Baby Girl, we gotta focus.” He said.

“I-I know! I’m trying!” She gasped. She mumbled to herself, “She’s just a kid...she’s just a kid...”.

I heard a beep on her screen, “Oh!” She said. 

I rushed over beside her, “What is it?” I asked.

“Carl Landrum. He lives with his daughter Valerie Landrum who has a very heavy mental health back ground. When she was younger she was found strangling her cat until it died before cutting the poor thing up and-- not important! She’s crazy.” She explained.

“So you think that her father Carl is capturing the victims and then giving them to Valerie as some type of twisted present?” Derek asked.

“Yes, I’m sending you his address now!” She asked.

//////////////////////                //////////////////////                /////////////////          ///////////////////

The car stopped abruptly in front of an old stone house with steel doors. We rushed into the building to hear screams, “Spencer?! Help!” I heard.

I rushed towards the noise down a steep set of stairs. I was met with a hall full of steel doors. Two were being banged on loudy and from one I heard my name being called, “Y/N?” I called out.

“Spencer, let me out!” She called out.

“Alright just umm--back up I’m gonna kick down the-- er, Morgan is gonna kick down the door!” I yelled.

Morgan ran up and kicked down the door. I peered in and it was dim, Y/N wore a pink dress with a white lace collar. Her hair was tied into a neat ponytail and her makeup looked as though it’d been done to make her look like a doll.

“Spencer!” She called out before pulling me into a hug. I hugged her back, all the germs I may be getting crossed into my mind but I pushed them out because I was just so fucking glad she was okay. 

One by one the doors came down, and Carl and Valerie who were on the third floor were arrested on sight. “I wanna go home...” She murmured.

“We’re gonna get you home soon, kid, I promise.” Hotch promised as his arm was around her protectively. 

I sat in the bullpen right next to Y/N, she was leaning into Hotch and JJ walked into the room.

“Where’s my mom?” Y/N asked.

“Well, she’s actually at work right now and can’t get away. She said she knows how serious it is and will be here as soon as possible. She told me to tell you she loves you, and to make sure you were safe.” JJ explained.

She nodded and JJ handed her a bag. “I figured you’d want to change out of that dress. I brought you one of my shirts and shorts. I know it’s a bit chilly out but I figured my pants might be too long.” JJ explained.

“It’s perfect. I’ll go change, thank you.” She said.

“No problem, oh, here.” JJ said.

She handed her a plastic pack, makeup wipes.

“Thanks.” She responded before walking away.

“So, I don’t think we should let Y/N sleep home alone tonight.” Garcia mentioned.

“Well her dad will be home, won’t he?” Hotch asked.

“She hasn’t told you?” Garcia asked.

“Told us what?” I asked.

“Her Dad died when she was eight.” Garcia explained.

“What? How?” I gasped

“He died on the field, he was a Marine.” Garcia answered.

Silence fell over the room.

“I wonder why she never told us...” Morgan thought aloud.

“The same reason she doesn’t tell us when other stuff is going on.” Hotch replied.

“Other stuff?” JJ asked.

“Sometimes she’ll come in. You can tell something is happening, but she doesn’t say anything because she feels her problems aren’t a big deal compared to ours, let alone to the victims we’re studying. So she keeps her mouth shut.” Hotch said.

Everyone nodded.

“So where’s she gonna stay?” Morgan asked.

“She can stay with me.” Hotch and I said at the same time.

“Actually, she can stay with you. I think staying in a house with people she doesn’t know maybe a little more uncomfortable than just you.” Hotch added.

I nodded, as much as I knew she’d be just as comfortable with Hotch, I cared too much about her to let her out of my sight after all this happened.

She walked back into the room wearing a plain grey shirt and black shorts with black sandals. Her hair was brushed out and fell across her shoulder, her face was fresh and she wore a plastered-on-smile.

“So, Y/N, we think you’ll probably be alone tonight. Your mother feels very guilty but--”

“I get it. I mean, how many truck drivers can deliver gas to the other side of the country?” I asked.

I smiled at her, feeling guilty that she couldn’t be with her mother after such a long day, “Well, if you didn’t want to sleep in your house alone tonight, you can stay with me.” I offered.

You could always see her emotions plain on her face, she was thinking, “Sure.” She said abruptly.

“Alright, do you wanna go now?” I asked.

She nodded before going to give the rest of the team hugs. 

“If you need anything, call me.” Hotch said.

“Promise.” She whispered.

He smiled and put his hand on her forehead, “Love you.” She said.

“You too.” He said.

“Bye, guys.” She said.

@criminal-navy-writings @dontshootmespence @veroinnumera If you wanna be tagged just message me!!