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#genuinely im getting to the point where i do not want to call myself a leftist anymore bc these chucklefucks are so annoying
local-magpie · 5 months
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hi im a self identified marxist on tumblr dot com and i call anyone who disagrees with me a liberal, because there's no way anyone who is a leftist would ever disagree with me. because the left is clearly a hivemind and this is a super normal take to have
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piplupod · 10 months
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me when i realize that pretty much everything in my life has actually only gotten worse since i graduated highschool, and all the times i was told things would get better were absolutely false !!!!!!
#i am going fucking insane. this is so stupid#i had a social life. i had friends. i had a job i could keep up with outside of school. i had a solid routine and schedule.#i had insurance. i didnt have to worry about money. i didnt have to buy groceries. i didnt have to cook every day.#i had enjoyable group activities. i had ppl telling me i was doing a good job. i had AUTHORITY FIGURES telling me i was doing a good job!!!!#i had a place to go to be away from home every weekday!! i had hope for the future still to some extent (not a lot but more than i do now)!#I DONT HAVE ANYYYY OF THAT NOW. I do have friends but not in-person!!! zero social life except hospital out-patient bullshit!!!#anyways the highschool is doing one of my fav musicals that i came THIS CLOSE to doing my grad year#but the vote was indecisive so they did some bullshit that nobody was happy with lmfao#i fucking petitioned hard. lobbied HARD. to get us to do that musical. i worked so hard to get everyone on board#but everyone was just waffling about it. and then we ended up w smth that nobody was happy with#AND NOW THIS YEAR. THEYRE DOING THAT FUCKING MUSICAL. THAT HURTS. LIKE A LOT. A LOT A LOT.#like to the point where i have now genuinely cried after hearing that theyre doing it#that was my one fucking chance in highschool to be part of a musical i actually cared about and enjoyed and i lost it#i had watched my brothers be in these fun musicals when they were in school but for my three years I got NOTHINGGG#it hurts so fucking bad. i had been looking forward to that ever since we moved to this town. and then i got fucking nothing.#and now that im out of there and realizing how my life is absolutely fucked and i have to kill myself then they finally do it.#gallons of salt in the big fat gaping wound. insane.#genuinely feeling kind of shocked. how the hell do things line up so perfectly to hurt me this badly so often fjfkfl#maybe im just fucking pathetic and overly emotional idk victim complex or smth awful#i just kind of want to be done like right now. but i have to wait at least a month before i call it quits so i dont wreck this time of year#for my family for the rest of their lives lmfao#my siblings and dad dont deserve that. my mother probably does but whatever#im tired!!! im fucking exhausted!!! this sucks so incredibly badly!!!#suicide tw
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entropys · 2 years
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:/
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apathyfairy · 2 years
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my whole life ive been thinking im an old soul bc everyone would tell me i was bc i was “serious” and quiet and shy as a kid and riddled with social anxiety so i was like ok. i must be then. and now im realizing im not lmao like honestly as stupid as it sounds i think that was putting pressure on me to know how to live my life and what to do all the time but now im like oh im new no wonder im afraid of absolutely everything and i cant function and everything disappoints me it’s bc i dont know whats going on. im new in town. and im incorporating that into my belief system now
#yeah im going insane clearly but anyways#in friends when joey is like what was my past life and phoebe was like oh sweetie youre brand new like lmao me#but did anyone else get called serious as a kid and did anyone else take it as an insult like i did like.#i hated absolutely nothing more than people being like oh youre so serious and quiet like i am but also i dont want to be here talking#to you so i have nothing to say. like sorry i wasnt saying every thought i had out loud like every other kid so that made me 'mature'#for my age like honestly that fucked my life up more than anything else was being called mature for my age. it put way too much pressure on#me and i didnt even get to be a kid because everyone expected me to be older than i always was and now that im#so old and approaching death it's just all regret man i have nothing but regret for how ive lived my life#and im so old and i have absolutely nothing figured out i just dont know what the fuck to do#i just didnt think things would be this fucked up or id still be this lost at this point in my life and its disgusting im disgusting#everything is just so fucked up and i hate it like absolutely nothing is right in my life right now i am truly at rock bottom#like i genuinely cannot imagine ever being at a lower point than im at right now and no that's not inspiring like 'oh it cant get any worse'#'if youre at your lowest point it can only get better :)' no thats not how it works#it can get worse i just cant possibly imagine how and nothing is ever going to get better bc i dont know how to get myself out of this#literally im spongebob in rockbottom but the bus is literally never coming like the bus station shut down that's where im at
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wolfertinger666 · 3 months
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I'm kinda tired I didn't get any sleep at all, I'm kinda stupid so I apologize if I sound incoherent but I'm just stupid for going back to the website that's the source of all my trauma and have people lie and call me every bad thing under the fucking sun for shit that is either a non issue, a genuine mistake, or something blown out of proportion, TO THE POINT WHERE PEOPLE ARE DISCREDITING ME AS A TRANS MAN(he's only trans to fetishsize trans people) DO YOUR HEAR YOURSELF???? literally nuclear level transphobic take. It makes me angry that people use the excuse of my actions as a teenager to harass the fuck out of me and like I said discredit myself and my identity. it's like I'm not even a living being to these people I'm just a cartoon villain and I'm tired of being quiet about.
the same website that harassed me to the point where I formed delusions over myself and my sense of identity and overall made me highly psychotic and suicidal. I was only 18-19 when this mass harassment callout bullshit on me has been happening. im not a saint either like I said I was an extremely toxic person but to go through these lengths to not only pedojacket me and call me a zoophile over a fucking pokemon with boobs, but to say I'm faking being trans to hurt other trans people makes my blood BOIL. this is not wanting someone to improve and take accountability it's just killing their sense of safety and community over shit that happened years ago which are HALF TRUTHS!!!!
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star-girl69 · 2 months
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giving the people what they want 🙏
warnings: ofc swearing and yes we get VERY freaky yet AGAIN, y/n refers to herself as kk’s controversially young gf bc i think it’s funny, deal w it
—-
you: babe we should do this trend
kk: yes come over
kk: don’t even have to film it i’ll do it for free
you: i know u wanna kiss me 💋
kk: i think that’s obvious
you: no it’s a tik tok sound
kk: ok great come over and kiss me
you: ok… calm down… i’m coming
kk: really???
you: what is wrong with u.
kk: i’m sorry plz forgive me ma’am
—-
you: come over
kk: yes i’m omw
you: amazing response time btw
—-
YOU: WHWN THEY CALLED OFF THE CIRCUS BURNED THR DISCO DOWN WHEN THEY SENT HOME THE HORSED AND THE RODEO CLOWNS IM STILL OM THAT TIGHTROPE IM STILL TRYING EVERYTHING TO GET U LAUGHINF AT ME AND IM STILK A BELIEVER BUT I DONT KNOW WHY IVE NEVER BEEN A NATURAL ALL I DO IS TRY TRY TRY IM STILL ON THAT TRAPEZE IM STILK TRYING EVERYTHING TO KEEP U LOOKING AF ME
kk: is this taylor swift?
you: omg u got it right?? i’m so proud ❤️
kk: i learned from the best 💪
—-
you: why do u have no food in ur apartment
kk: ?? we have food
you: literally here rn and u don’t
kk: me and laila went shopping yesterday babe
you: *laila and i
kk: same thing
kk: i’m sure u can find something
you: i cant and im starving
kk: baby there’s food
you: i’m never eating again bye
you: i hate u healthy freaks
you: buy potato chips like normal ppl
kk: okay baby
you: i was hangry im sorry
kk: i figured 😂 no worries babe
kk: did u eat?
you: yes i had to doordash tho
kk: 🙄
—-
kk: i love u
you: PLEASE DONT KYS
kk: what????
you: i’m sorry it’s an automatic response
you: i love u too ❤️
kk: u confuse me sometimes
you: then i’m succeeding at being ur controversially young gf who’s references u don’t understand 🫡
—-
you: do u hate me?
kk: no ofc not
you: are u sure?
kk: yes i’m sure where is this coming from babe?
you: u let go of my hand earlier ☹️
kk: babe are u fr rn?
you: bye u hate me ok i’ll just see myself out
kk: and i’ll just drag u right back in bc i don’t hate u
kk: when did i even let go of ur hand?
you: when u were adjusting the bags ☹️
kk: ok so
kk: i let go of ur hand for one second to adjust the shopping bags i was carrying for u and u think i hate u?
you: yes exactly
you: do u?
kk: i love u my very clingy girl 😂
—-
kk: what is aura?
you: like aura points or the actual metaphysical thing
you: pls use it in a sentence
kk: “this dance is giving u negative aura points”
you: ok translation: doing this dance makes u look like a fucking loser
you: basically it’s like coolness
you: like if i tell someone “outfit gives u +1000 aura points” i’m basically saying like ur fit ate
kk: oh i see
kk: thank u baby
you: controversially young gf to the rescue 🫡
kk: u do realize ur not that much younger than me right
kk: like it’s not controversial
you: can u let me have this.
kk: okay baby ur my controversially young gf
you: thank u very much ❤️
—-
you: stop cheating on me.
kk: excuse me?
kk: i’m literally standing across from u. we’re in the same room right now
you: tell that bitch to back off before i do
kk: are u jealous?
you: obviously not. come here now
you: please
kk: yes ma’am
kk: i don’t even know who ur talking about btw
you: the blonde?
kk: i was genuinely too busy looking at u to notice
—-
you: omg this is so us.
kk: it’s a deer and a raccoon??
you: u just don’t get it…
kk: what is there to get
you: see the deer is me and u are the raccoon and the raccoon is hugging and kissing the deer
you: bc like ur so clingy
kk: unfortunately that makes sense
—-
you: i miss you
kk: yeah baby?
you: please come over
kk: i cant rn babe
you: please baby i miss u so muchhhh
kk: i’m sorryyyy sweetheart
kk: i’ll see what i can do but probably in an hour yeah?
you: that’s too long
you: come over now
kk: i’m sorry babe i cant
you: please caroline
you: i need you
kk: 30 mins
you: i need u really badly though…
kk: 20 minutes i promise
you: caroline please i really really need u rn
you: u know where i need u
kk: be there in 5
—-
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unluckilyimnot · 4 months
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Hii!! Hope you're doing well, i just discovered you and im OBSESSED with your posts. Idk if you saw the chapter 260 leaks yet, so if you dont wanna get spoiled, please read this request after reading the new chapter. I wanted to request some headcanons for ness, kaiser, reo and bachira where they are dating the reader and the readers parents basically sees them as their son (my parents are just like that for my older sisters boyfriend and they call him their son. Even invite him over for vacations and family dinners everytime. I think its really cute🥹💕) I was thinking of this request especially for kaiser after seeing his backstory. Feel free to ignore if you want to. Also thank you for your posts i LOVE the way you write💕
S/o with a welcoming family - Reo, Kaiser, Bachira, Ness
m.list | rules
Note : hi thank you for your request! You're so sweet thank you dear ♡ You don't know but that's a sensible point for myself and the day you send this I spend the night crying about my shitty parents
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Kaiser
He's shocked the first time he meets your parents
He's not the type to feel comfortable around parental figure for obvious reasons
Your parents welcoming him like he belongs here touch him in a way he can't explain
He's invited more and more, your mom rely on him when she needs help and so does your dad, it's all new to him
If you have a rather intimate and physical touch is a norm, he's probably shocked at first
It has nothing to do with you and the way you touch him, yet he feels like crying the first time your mother hugged him
He's probably less cocky since he doesn't feel the need to do so around them
It just became a safe place, just after you
Ness
With you and how you talk about your parents, he already thinks that he can get along with them
But when your mom mentions how she loves books/movies he can't help but talk about what he likes as well !
He would probably be closer to her in that sense but he does his best for your dad to like him as well
He likes to help around so he's accepted really soon
If you have younger siblings he LOVES to spend time with them !!
It's endearing and you know how bad he needs it
Bachira
He'll bring so much joy to your parents
Particularly if your an only child
Seeing you with someone so childish will probably heal sometignf in them, you seem so happy and joyful
Bachrira would feel weird at first to be treated like you are but will comes to love it
He loves your parents a lot
To the point where he'll even celebrate his birthday with your family once in a while
He's never been welcome somewhere like this, it will heal something inside of him as well for sure
Reo
He's always welcome with hugs or your father's gently patting his back
He learn what it is to be listened to
He's used to speak without people listening to him so the first time your parents answer and go on the same conversation as him, he'll feel seen
His jaw clenched but a genuine smile will form on his lips
They're just like you are, warm and welcoming
Your dad LOVES him so much
They can talk together for hours and you love to see him this comfortable around your family
If you have siblings, they love him I just know it they told me
You can tell how radiant he is and it makes you glad you introduced him
He's always welcome with hugs or your father's gently patting his back
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caputvulpinum · 2 years
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this might seem dumb and i promise im being genuine here. im just kind of fucking stupid and i would appreciate a little reassurance if you have the time
am i a bad person for not being able to reclaim queer?
i have a lot of trauma with the word and people using it for me without my consent is really triggering. my abusers used it and other words as slurs while they were hurting me. ive been trying really hard to get over it, i promise, but when it's used against me i still like... have panic attacks and flashbacks. other people using it for themselves doesn't do that to me, it's just when it's used toward me.
does not being comfortable with it being used on me make me a TERF? in the past people have taken "please don't call me queer" as "nobody should ever use that word" and even though im trans, theyve told me it's TERFy not to use it? i absolutely support other people reclaiming it and i really am trying to get over myself, but the panic attacks keep happening and now i'm paranoid that im a bad person for not being able to use it
I think the biggest frustration I have with this whole thing is that a narrative has been created where people would tell you yes, Anon, that you are a TERF and so on. And that's just not the case.
Even beyond the fact that words mean things and TERF doesn't just mean "transphobia on tumblr", the fact is that there are always going to be people whose experiences with a word will never be able to be reconciled. I've said throughout this whole thing: Every word we have ever had for ourselves is a slur, because they have all, always, been used as slurs against us.
And what I mean with that is not just "So fighting against queer as a term is therefore transphobic for this and other reasons".
What I also mean is "We need to be aware that there will never be a perfect word. There will never be a word which has been harmless. There is no point in trying to invent new terminologies to escape ongoing oppression, because those terminologies will just be used against us in the same way all others are."
Anon, you aren't a bad person for having traumatic experiences with being called a slur. The idea of that is ridiculous, and I'm as sorry you've been made to feel that way as I am angry at the people who said that to you. Barely better than your traumatizers if at all, all of them.
But I want you to also hear what I am telling you. You have faced experiences which were traumatic for you. This word is one which is a weapon that can always be used against you, right now, and it will never miss its mark. Traumas do not exist in a vacuum: you can't let it keep festering in you.
Because it's like I kept saying as well...if you allow your oppressors to have the language that can harm you, they will use it. Queer is a word you can't use for yourself right now. That's okay. You are not a bad person for that. But traumas can't go untreated. I'd recommend looking into mental health resources for LGBTQ+ people in your area. Therapy works. At its most basic level, therapy would give you the vocabulary you need to express how this is a trauma of yours, and might even be vocabulary which better helps you understand why it remains so harmful for you. I hope for your sake that you can one day make a decision for yourself on this word that isn't being controlled on a traumatic level for you, even if the decision you make is "I still don't like it for me". Hell, especially if that's the decision you make. What matters, Anon, is that you decide what words you want for yourself, and not the people who traumatized you deciding for you.
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olderthannetfic · 4 months
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Obvious Disclaimer that this is not about any specific anon in particular, not about OTNF themself, but that my following rant might *slightly* punch down on people who ARE, well, older than net fics are.
But my honest opinion is that I really don’t like it when us old heads tend to sorta…talk down to? “Adultsplain”, if that’s even a thing? To The Gen Zs, by being like “damn kids! back in my day we never used our real name or posted selfies or posted about our personal life at all!” Don’t get me wrong, I’m one of those people who never posted the real me — but not because I was anonymous and cared about online safety, because I was a liar 😂 That being said, there ARE older people who definitely over-shared or “doxxed” themselves and still do, and there’s younger people who don’t!
I also feel like being “ha, these stupid KIDS who post about their FANDOM LIFE on TIK TOCK under their REAL NAME AND FACE where IRLS CAN SEE THEM, how STUPID” is not doing anyone any favors. Is that, technically, a smart thing for kids to do? No. Has it become normalized? Yes. And does that suck for people who might be bullied or outed or whatever cuz they genuinely are dumb and don’t know better and then someone they don’t like sees their stuff? Yes.
We all talk about how there’s no more kids spaces on the internet and how that’s a shame, but then five seconds later we’ll reblog that one “At any time I’m at risk of seeing a 14 year olds opinion and that’s why I hate it here” post. There’s really so few kid spaces on the net now, that’s true. We should extend empathy and let the teens be obnoxious and pretentious in peace, rather than making it a point to “ratio” or “roast them.” Idk personally I’d be completely unbothered if some 14 year old insulted my fic or my ship or whatever. I’d just block and move on, no need to try to argue with them.
And also, not all kids are even pretentious or obnoxious! I’m not saying we all need to take the kids under our wings, but we should be careful about not hating them just for being in their teens years, you know?
Also… telling a teenager to not post PII or not get into discourse or not have social media or whatever will NOT work the way you want it to 😭 kids are by default a little bit oppositionally defiant so telling some rando teen to Get Off Your Lawn (blog) rather than just blocking them, will encourage said teen to Stay On Your Lawn.
I just hate how it’s become normal for adults to talk down to teens online. I was harassed by adults online as a kid, then years and years and years later i went through my own “Older Than You™️”phase where I myself was a shit to teenagers, and I truly regret that so much. To this day I still need to make an effort to be careful. I saw on Twitter where an adult posted a DM from a 13 year old, mocking them. The DM said “I’m 14 next year, can I follow you? Please don’t groom me.” And the adult OP was laughing at how stupid the dm was. A few years ago, I would’ve been one of the people retweeting that and rolling my eyes at the child. Now im disgusted by the people who WERE laughing at them.
And again I’m obviously not saying we should be “nice” to the teenagers who mock us for our ships or who virtue signal too hard. But we also don’t need to make fun of their CARRDS or call them Puri-teens or rag on them just for being 17 or younger, yk?
--
Teens aren't 'puriteens' just for being young, dude. They have to also be puritanical bullies.
I find the stuff about real names hilarious because, actually, if you're really Internet Old™, then you probably did use your real name... it was right there in your university e-mail address! Or your random early ISP address if your stepdad got it for you and thought the university format was the default. Thanks, stepdad.
I've done every single dumb thing from going to meet my internet pen pal at an Alice Cooper concert to flying to Ireland from Japan to stay with a fandom friend I'd never met without telling anyone where I was going and without a credit card or enough cash to flee if I had to. I remember sitting on the plane thinking "Man, this is such a CSI episode topic".
The really funny part was that despite what she'd said before I visited, we ran into each of her parents at different times and ended up going to a play courtesy of her uncle, and all of them were like "So how do you know each other?" and "But you'd met before, right? RIGHT?!"
The level of panopticon is horrifying now. Teens have my sympathy. That part really is worse, and I think it's driving an entire generation nuts and we're going to see even more shit about people wanting to run away and live in a cabin in the woods with no internet. But in general, I don't think we're so different.
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cyberkitty1 · 1 year
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Politely grabbing your shoulders could you please do a miles x male reader if you can
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Miles Morales x male!reader
You meet after he shows up to his fathers party late and is grounded. He storms downstairs not paying attention when he bumps into you. You were holding a ton of books in hand and managed to drop all of them due to impact.You both fall back
you had landed at the bottom of the stairs him landing at the top of the stairs.
His eyes open and sees you at the bottom. Frantically he goes down to help you up “ Shoot, im so sorry I wasn't looking where I was going! Are you ok?” You look at him with an awkward smile “ No yea im fine! Are you ok?” Miles gets uo frantically attempting to help you stand “ You don't need to ask me that I made you fall with all these books! Ill help you take them where you need to” You put your hands up defensively “ no no its ok really! “ He shakes his head “ No its fine I have nothing to do anyways let me help” sighing defeatedly you guys pick up the books and go to your apartment.
You open the door letting him in so he could put the books down on the dining table “ Oh my name is Miles by the way” he says with a bright shining smile you could never miss. “ I’m __ nice to meet you” For a second you guys just stand there till he looks at the shoes on the shoe rack at the door “ Oh my god are those the new dunks?” He stands looking into space “ called… umm” “PLUM ECLIPSE!” he points at you and you point back.
“ Yea I work at foot locker so we get shoes first, I have a ton more that arnt even released yet” He looks at you with eyes of adoration and curiosity
“ You mind showing them to me? I am a shoe connoisseur if I do say so myself” he says giving you smug face.
You let out a genuine laugh. “ Yea sure follow me” .
—————————————
taglist: @rosesndan @shoyofroyoyoyo @p3rf3ct4ng3l @nagi3seastorm @iheartmorales @itsnanabanana @kxllanxtdoor @royalty-cashinout @hana-1235 @lanasfloridakiloss
ALSO ASKS ARE OPEN AGAIN!!!
sorry this took me so long to write, i love to procrastinate 😜
also sorry if its not what you wanted! I myself never thought i would even accept male reader works/ trans asks so again sorry if its not what you wanted!
another sorry if it doesn’t even seem like a male reader 😞
EDIT: also my stuff is for anyone I don’t think I really use pronouns in my stuff + if you want me to write something more gender specific lmk!!
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maxknightley · 5 months
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hey man listen, im sure you just didnt know because hes just a funny haha tweets guy but dril is literally an outspoken nazi on twitter and has made mulitple tweets with nazi dogwhistles and literally responded to someone going "its not a joke, i fucking hate jews". like theres screenshots and posts and stuff about it out there and im sure you could dig through his twit. none of my posts about this ever get picked up because no one wants to admit the internet funnyman is a bad guy but hes like. a literal actual nazi. take that as you will
disclaimer for my followers: do not start shit with this person. I swear to fucking god. be cool.
not to be rude but I looked this up:
on twitter's website, where I found nothing;
on twitter's mobile app, where I also found nothing;
on DuckDuckGo, where I found nothing except the "(((keebler elves)))" tweet, which I think you could reasonably argue was in poor taste but hardly seems like a sincere endorsement of fascist beliefs;
and on Google, where I again found nothing except the "(((keebler elves)))" tweet and people talking about the keebler elves tweet
so, like, with all due respect I think you're either misremembering something / conflating him with someone else, or someone is fucking with you. I'm genuinely not sure what else this could be referring to, other than his recent slew of tweets mocking the nation-state of Israel, which - speaking as an antizionist Jew - I think are good and funny
the main reason I'm posting a response to this ask at all is because I get asks like this a lot. like, every couple months at this point. but usually they're not about dril, who 1. barely uses this website and barely ever has, and 2. has bigger things to worry about! usually they're about Some Trans Woman who I may never have even fucking heard of. I've gotten asks calling latina trans women "white" and accusing them of being turbo-racist because they Disagreed With Someone One Time. I've gotten asks trying to convince me that a woman I've never spoken to is a sexual predator based on literally zero evidence of any kind. and it gets fucking tiresome. okay? it's really, really fucking tiresome
so I figure I'll post this one because it's illustrative, and because it won't stir up shit around someone who might actually get hurt by it. please stop doing this. please stop sending me completely unsupported asks about how such-and-such is a terrible person.
at the bare fucking minimum send me actual concrete Posts that I can look at, because then I can actually judge for myself whether it's something worth getting upset about. otherwise there's basically a 10% chance I look into it, find nothing tangible, and shrug, and a 90% chance it goes straight into the trash.
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aita for telling someone they're a horrible person and making them relapse?
trigger warning: self-harm, suicide(?)
so im, like many teenagers online, an avid participant of fandom spaces and my current favorite is genshin impact. if you've ever interacted with the genshin fandom you may guess where this is going but i happened to find myself liking a ship that is the big nono ship in this fandom (aka the incest ship, kaeluc) but since i mostly stick to my space and don't really interact with anyone that doesn't already have content of this ship on their account id never gotten into any hot water over it.. until recently.
this person, ill call them rick, suddenly liked a bunch of my (non-ship related) posts. normal interaction, i didn't think anything of if and moved on. (i didn't even notice at the time, but they unliked all of the posts before what happened next, i assume as they realized i was a proshipper and didn't want to associate with me.) next thing i know, the same user is in my askbox, sending me the most vile, hate filled messages i have ever seen.
ok... no biggie. i delete the asks, block them and move on with my life. but it doesn't stop. i had never in my whole life received hate online, but now for the first time ever, i had a dedicated hater, sending me anonymous asks at all times of the day. death threats, dox threats, telling me to kill myself, calling me a degenerate and all that, all with the same consistent writing style. now, one could say that maybe this wasn't rick, and maybe not even all the same person but i really feel like this is the only reasonable explanation considering i have like 6 followers and my most famous post has 3 notes. i don't think im important enough to have that many haters.
so, i did the only thing i could think to do: turned off anon asks. then the asks started coming from random throwaway accounts. ok...turned off asks. then it was dms. turned those off too. THE FUCKING COMMENT SECTIONS OF MY POSTS.
dedication isn't enough to describe this. at this point it's actually becoming distressing to me and im considering closing my whole account cause i just wanna get away from all this. im 16, i don't have the mental capacity to spend all day policing my social media because someone wants me to die for liking fictional incest.
so i very reluctantly unblock rick and send them a dm. i very gently ask if they are the person who has been sending me asks/dms/etc and if they are, if they could please stop because it's become genuinely distressing to me and i just want to be silly on a website. they block me.
alright, im now out of options. everything on my profile is blocked at this point and i don't even want to post anything else so i just kind of leave the account behind for a while. when i come back, i discover that someone HACKED into the account and defaced the whole thing (changed pfp, deleted posts etc etc) so now im genuinely bummed. i go to rick's profile and guess who has been unblocked? i ask them if they can please answer my question. they don't answer but instead tell me i deserve everything ive gotten and i should choke for all they care.
i tell them they're a terrible person and go absolutely off the rails like the dumb, upset teenager i am. i didn't say anything particularly horrible (mostly i just tell them about how awful they've made me feel over fictional shit that really doesn't matter and how i just wanted peace) but i definetely wouldn't like to receive a message like that. and rick didn't either, because they blocked me.
well, since im sure you're wondering where this comes in, here's where i kind of feel like an asshole:
i continued to stalk rick's account on a different blog (because i was bitter. ok?) and they've been posting about how they relapsed into self harm because of a message they received from a stranger and how they've been crying non-stop and this is the worst relapse they've had in years and etc etc and i just got this pit in my stomach. this person's bio says they're 15! i don't want to ever be the reason a fifteen year old is hurting themselves! i've been feeling like a piece of shit ever since (esp since i also deal with sh) and i just feel like the worse person ever. i honestly don't know if i was just acting like anyone else and this was an unfortunate consequence or if i need to go pray for god to forgive my sins or something.
aita?
What are these acronyms?
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dollyhao · 11 months
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ameliorate; to make better
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pairing: dina x reader
summary: dina is overwhelmed by all the things that happened in seattle…. and ellie, and being a single mother doesn’t make it any easier. when a sweet woman comes to make her life easier...better.
toni's note: there's nothing to warn about besides a bit angst, it doesn't really get angsty till the next part. im hoping i can make this into 3 parts. thank you for 800 followers by the way!
word count: 1k
you hear the sound of a wailing baby as you make your way back home, you follow the sound. you cant be too sure about these kinda things, what if something bad happened. you stumble upon dina rocking baby jj in a rocking chair on her porch, shushing him trying to console him. dina looks tired and overwhelmed, dark circles under her eyes and unbrushed hair.
you approach her gently not wanting to startle her, “hey, can i try?” you give her a gentle smile pointing at jj. dina tucks a piece of hair behind her ear nodding, “y-yea sure. you can try, hes been crying a lot lately.” you reach for jj bouncing and rocking in a comforting rhythm, chanting soft shushes. jj quiets down letting out a calm gurgle. you look back up at dina seeing her rub her hands down her face in an exhausted manner.
she chuckles, “i cant even get my son to be quiet let alone sleep, ellie was really good at that..” she puts her elbows on her knees putting her face in her hands. you stay quiet letting her have her moment, still rocking jj as he starts to doze off. dina seems to regroup, looking back up at you curiously, “would you like to come in? its getting cold out here.” dina offers standing up. “yea, thanks.”
dina walks into the house and you follow, “no. thank you. i appreciate what you did. “ “where’s his bed?” you ask now that jj is fast asleep. “he sleeps with me, the room is down the hall.” you go to the room, laying jj down, making sure hes comfortable before leaving the room. dina is in the kitchen making herself a cup of tea, “would you like some?” she glances at you over her shoulder. “yes please.” you stand awkwardly, hands in your back pockets swaying a little. she nods over to the living room with 2 cups in her hands. you follow taking a seat on the couch as she hands you a cup.
you thank her, taking a sip. “are you new to jackson? i dont remember ever seeing you before.” you chuckle, “no im not new, ive been here for years now.” you give a shy smile. “oh im sorry, i cant believe ive never noticed you.” “its fine. i preferred to stay to myself anyway. i work at the school. im a teacher,” you sit your cup down looking at her, “i always wanted to approach you, i thought you were beautiful. but you were dating jesse and then after you and jesse broke up, you and ellie made a nice little scene at the party.” you chuckle watching her face flush slightly. “also, im sorry about jesse…. and ellie.” she nods, quiet for a minute before replying. “thank you, for the jesse and ellie thing… and for calling me beautiful.” you smile at her.
you look outside seeing how dark it was getting, “i should get going.” you say standing up. dina stands up too, “thank you again. he probably would’ve cried through the night.” “of course, just let me know if you need my help again. ill be happy to help.” you walk backwards as you talk smiling at her until you run into a wall. “ah, shit..” you say rubbing the back of your head. dina laughs and follows you to the door as you turn around and walk correctly. “ill be sure to ask for your help again.” she says giving you a soft, genuine smile.
a week later, you walk into the dining hall as maria is walking out, “hey maria, is there anything you needed from me?” you wanted to make sure there wasn’t something you were suppose to be doing that you forgot about. “no. nothing that i can remember. im about to take this to dina, i wanna make sure shes staying fed.” “ill take it to her!” you say a little too eagerly for your taste. for the last week, you’ve been trying to find any excuse to visit dina and jj when you weren’t busy. dina doesn’t seem to ever object to the company. she appreciates you coming around and talking to her and playing with the baby. so when this opportunity pops up, of course your gonna take it. “let me grab myself a plate and ill take hers to her.” you say taking the plate out her hands. “well ok. thank you.” you smile before walking away.
you get to dina’s door knocking with the two plates in your hands. dina opens the door looking a little breathless, “oh, hey.” she gives you one of her soft smiles shes been giving you quite a lot. “hey, i brought you food. not sure if you ate or not.” “right.. food. i definitely forgot to eat. “ she says rubbing a hand through her hair. she gives another small smile, but this one doesn’t reach her eyes. “thats ok. i have food for you, lets not dwell to much on a honest mistake. k?” she nods. you hear a baby cry in the background, “i see you have two plates. wanna come in and eat? i was just feeding jj.” “id love to” you respond walking in.
you guys walk to the dining table where you find jj in a high chair. “hey baby boy!” you say tickling his belly, he lets out a squeal/giggle. you and dina sit on either sides of him after a minute, you see dina subtly go to smell herself. she lets out a wince, “um do you mind feeding him while i go take a shower.” you nod, “of course.” you say as you slide his food bowl over to yourself. you give dina a reassuring smile letting her know its ok.
when dina gets out the shower and is dressed, she walks in the living room while brushing her hair seeing you and jj on the carpet in her living room playing. she smiles, it felt good being able to enjoy a shower without rushing out to jj. she trusts you with jj almost the way she trusted ellie with him. yall look her way, both you and jj smiling at her. she comes and joins, both of you enjoying the sweet giggles of the cute baby.
(part 1)
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demuredociledoll · 17 days
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kitty's bimbo bucket list
Use these to break me
soooooo i'm a tgirly who's been on hrt a long time now, i have great tits and great ass and my brain is Way fuzzier but like. i want more. i wanna be like the cool girls i see on who are just completley ultrafeminine. i wanna be the perfect boys girl. im like. might to be a bimbo tradwife. i wanna be that so bad. ive also like. been doing the bambi 20 day challenge and its like. making me realise i neeed to make these changes lol
so i thought id like. make a list of things i need to do to be the girl of my dreams i see girls with lots of fun lists where they like say "at 10 reblogs i'll do this and i kinda like. wanna arrange this like one of those eventually (if you see a bimbofication step-by-step around PLease send it to me!! i love doing what rules say). reeeeeeeally reeally reeally open to feedback and other things to include on this list.
Bimbofying my looks
so this bits like. ways i want to look prettier :)
Nails always varnished: i think this might be the most easy for me to do as i spend a lot of time painting my nails anyway, but i wanna make like a pledge to make sure my nails are Never left unpainted. i think this would be a good place to start on this
Makeup every day - i used to wear makeup every day before covid and i reeeeeeeeeally wanna get back into the swing of it. i only do it like, maybe like once every few months which just Sucks. especially when i look so pretty doing it. so i wanna like get back into a position where i do my go to routine (foundation+eye shadow+eye liner+lipstick+lip liner) at least once a month, then at least once a week, then at least every day i'm not working, then at least every day i dont have like, a work video call, then every day.
Dyeing my hair: i reeeeeeeeally wanna dye my hair but im so scared of losing my natural colour. so im thinking of like, starting Blonde frosted tips as a start, before working up to being a totally bleach blonde
Get rid of trousers and only wear skirts: girls literally shouldnt wear trousers. it literally should be illegal. i wanna like. slowly get to a point where i only wear skirts. skirts make it easy for boys to access my holes :) but actually having said that. boys really like tight clothes. so i should keep wearing ultra tight. i also need to really increase my lingerie and sexy clothes collecshon :)
Lip fillers!! I reeeeeeeeeally wanna get lip fillers but i know its gonna be a big step to get there. i wanna do everythign i can to make my lips bigger naturally in the meantime. i think i wanna get lip fillers first before i think about. bigger tits. i reeeeeeeally want srs so bad but like., thats the goverments problem
getting bgiger: im like sooooo thin at the moment, and i neeeeeeed to get bigger tits and a bigger belly to make me more grabbable and wobbly. its a little diffcult because ive got like. lots of tummy issues. but i wanna slowly scale up my food intake. ive been eating lots of ice cream but i wanna like. follow a proper plan for biggerising myself feedee style
brain feminisation and IQ reduction
sooooo this sections like. ways to girlify my brain and make sure i just think girl thoughts
im alreayd doing good on hypnos with the bambi challenge (which is going soooooo well!! im learning sosososooso much :) ). but like. i wanna keep listening to hypnos moer
staying in my place; i'm already Really good at this. doing the cooking, cleaning, housekeeping, serving men in every way i can i am already 100% that. i stepped back from a job recently so ill have even more time to do that and i can't Wait.
knowing my place: despite this i clearly like, have a tonne of feminist baggage from my old self i really need to get rid of. i need to like. have my opinions broken and like, have like the gender politics of a conservative American housewife drilled into me. i wanna genuinely believe that women should stay in the kitchen and women shouldnt work and shoudl just serve men (smart boys please please please fix me!!!). i want pro-patriarhcy to be like. my mission in life. im thinking of like. writing lots of good girl essays on tumblr to try and fix my brain lol
dumming down my writing and speaking: likeee i think im already making good practice on this, ive been workiing on a lot lately. im trying to like. not use words longer than two soundy things, like short words, with the only ones allowed being like. sexy words. and mispeling them when i cant use any other words that are small. and using the wrong words and to like get rid of capital letters apostroches. i think im getting there on this. i also need to dumb down my speaking but honestly like im already there with that, i always say words wrong and everyone makes so much fun of me for it, it turns me a lot when people make fun of me for saying words wrong lol :)
girlify my music tastes: i reeeeeeally need to get into some girlier music. i really want to. currently i dont really have much of a music taste, i mostly just listen to synthy tunes and stuff which are easy to listen to while doing worky things. however, like ive tried listening to more popular stuff like taylor swift and the brat album and its like, okay, but its like not my thing lol. I used to be suuuuuuper into paramore but im like, aware thats a more like punchy girl band and im like not that lol. update im gonna work these into my daily music playlists!!
girlify my media intake and hobbies: currently i listen to a lot of boy stuff inherited from my old self, like ww2 books and podcasts which are...boring lol. i dont want learn things like that anymore. i wannna watch more stuff thats for girls, but im not really too sure where to begin? ive tried like, reading girleir magazines like Good Housekeeping and the like but it doesnt like. completely engage me lol
taking cock and being a good sexdoll
this section is like. ways i wanna be a better fuckdoll :)
m already like. so good at blowjobs. i absoltuely adore blowjobs. i dont think theres anything i need to improve here. i already deep throat, swallow every time. id like to take more facials though :)
but i neeeeeed to get better with my other hole. again i used to ride my dildo all the time prepandemic but ive fallen out the habit, its like my makeup i only really play on veyr special ocassions
increase my toy collecshun: my toys are not in as good condition as they used to be and i want like. good ones. i need to like. make a good purchase of some good quality toys for assfucking. i already have some good buttplugs :)
get good at getting my ass fucked: im thinking of like. mirroring what i did with my makeup here. like go from wearing my buttplug for a long period at least once a month, once a week, when im not working...etc. and likewise wiht my dildo. aggain its hard because i have a lot of tummy and bottom issues.
Only cum with permisson: this is so important. girls literally should not control their cumming. it should literally be against the law. im thinking of listening to cals curse some more to like. make that a hard and fast rule lol
so like!! this is what i kind think of right now. but i really wanna like. learn more from others and think. thank you!!!!!!!!
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7nessasaryevils · 4 months
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I'm back with things that made me clutch my chest, snap my neck, scream into the void etc etc... from ep 6 of Wandee Goodday.
Settle in my loves, we're in for one heck of a ride!
- starting us off strong with Yak waking up Dee, pouting about them not being able to see each other for a week because of the training camp, THE HEAD RUFFLE AND FOREHEAD KISS.... HELP ME IM GOING TO KILL THEM
- we're also back to the elephant pants and I cannot describe my happiness at seeing Yak wearing something that makes him comfortable while being with Dee
- that whole fucking montage... look at these domestic "we're just fuck buddies" assholes. Gentlemen, you wouldn't know "fuck buddies" if they were sucking your dick....
- TOOTHBRUSHES SIDE BY SIDE
- HES WEARING THE NECKLACE
- I had to physically stop myself from smacking my head into a wall at Yak's "I see you (Dee) more than I see her (Taem)" .... insert Scar's imsurroundedbyidiots.gif
- I love the way Dee thinks that Yoryak has no weakness? He genuinely seems surprised that Yak needs to go get trained 🥹🥹 also how worried he is when Yak explains his first loss...
- here's me toasting you Khun Yak for that sex joke 🤣👍🏽
-Patpran would be so proud... BET ERA MY BELOVED (if they fist bump I'll scream... oh phooey they didn't)
- them texting each other about their day... gwenchana gwenchana 😭😭😭
- I guess Oishi GreenTea is not sponsoring them 😅🤣
- Yak and Yei... just that scene...
- dee on the couch... quite obviously missing Yak... you dumbass ♥️🥺
- HE LEFT HIS PANTS THE- HE LEAVES CLOTHES AT DEE'S PLACE YOU DUMBASSES ARE SO INTO BOYFRIEND TERRITORY ITS OBVIOUS TO PLUTO!!
- that change in perspective... Golf... I see you and your masterful brain 👀👀👀
- HES WEARING THE PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNTTTTTTSSSSSSS
- Dee making a mess on the mirror on purpose (I'm not crying I'm NOT)
- sweetheart... you're in love with Yoryak... 🥹🥺♥️
- Cher? My darling? Give Yei a really good blowjob when he comes back because your hubby is fucking SMART (also yak and yei sleeping on a bed together... adorable sibling behaviour)
- me when Yak walks outside: ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh wandee is gonna show up he's gonna show up he lost the bet he's gon- OHHHHH YAK CLOSED HIS EYES AND WHEN HE OPENS THEM DEE WILL BE THERE!!!!
- me when i turned out to be right:
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- "the atmosphere here is nice." "It got even better with you here." SOMEBODY SEDATE ME!
- hey pot? I believe the kettle is calling you black.
- give me a kiss... look at these two idi-
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- you know when you have to put your phone down because you cannot believe the audacity? Yeah... that's me when Yak points right to his lips. Sir. You dumbass.
- my knees just gave out
- nobody hold me back im about my plant my foot into Ter's face
- KAAAAAAOOOOOOO HI BABY!!
- oh no. Oh no no no no. This is one time I do NOT WANT a whole "oh there's only one bed"!!!!
- side note: is this what happened with Billy and Babe when they went to Japan? 🤔🤔 thank you Kao 🤣♥️
- forget my foot. I'm dropping a fucking ANVIL on this asshole's face- where does Ter get off making decisions for Dee???
- DONT KISS HIM BACK OFF STRANGER DANGER STRANGER DANGER YAK HELP!!! (edit: two mins later I was even more pissed off because Ter knows that Dee has a boyfriend, "fake" as it is, and he still tried to kiss Dee! This dickhead!!!)
- WELL DONE DEE!
- well done P'Golf!! HPV knowledge my beloved ♥️♥️
- Dee no!!! Don't think about that horse-faced dick doctor (if I had a quarter every time I said that, I'd have two quarters only... but weird for it to happen twice - fuck you Dr. Charlatan!!!)
- YAK! Come get your man!!
- I'm all for you two seeing each other again but NOT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET THATS HOW WE DIE!!! MOVE YOU DUMB GAYS! (Edit: Kay but now think of the fact that Dee is terrified of crossing the street and how easily he does it when it's Yak he's walking to...this is okay I'm okay I'm so okay)
- love and the city... p'golf you fucking genius
- kisses in the stairwell... gods they really want me to choke don't they?
- second time I had to put my phone down... Yoryak... I'm this close to drop-kicking you across the country
- my body is yours... and so is your heart you idiot get to that realization faster!!! Pat would be so disappointed!
- Kao coming in with those truths... my utmost respect for you sir 🫡🫡
- oh shit...
- TAEM YOU QUEEN YES!!
- DEE YOU DUMBASS NO!
- hats off to Cher and Yei being adorable and happy in their sex lives which includes phone sex!!! We approve!!!
- the side by side!!!! Interesting to think of it as a couple making love vs. a couple fucking but it's actually two couples in love... awww
- OYEI AND CHER LIP KISS THANK YOU P'GOLF!!!!
- Kao. Sir. I'm erecting temples in your honour. Making merit. Fasting. Praying for you to find someone who loves you the way you want to be loved. I'm doing it all for you because you fucking deserve it.
- the pink on Dee's face... sweetheart you're so in love with him 🥺🥺
- GROUP DATE!!!! And our resident idiot gays are in matching pants.... lord gimme strength
- feeding each oth- breathe Nessie breathe. The idiots know not how they hurt you.
- Yak recognizing that something's going on between Yei and Cher is such a lovely thing. Now if only he could realize stuff about himself and Dee!
- third time I put down my phone... but to cry because Yak remembers Dee's fear and holds his hand I'm fucking fine don't touch me
- oh no... Yei you got yourself mixed up with loan sharks! honey no!
- yak comparing the pics of him, Cher, Yei and Dee to the family picture... this epsiode really said we're going to stomp on your heart Nessie...
- they're still holding hands... fuck
- I'm begging whatever deity is listening to me: please don't let there be a scene where Dee tells the public about yak's secret place
- one more word and I'll kiss you... on the lips. (Okay but the fact that he says this and still thinks he might be in love with Taem makes me feel like this 👇🏽
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- Yei you utter romantic sap 🥹🥹🥹🥹🫡
- the story of how Yei and Cher met... fucking fuck 😭😭😭
- and then ending it off with Dee knowing that no matter what his feelings, the fact that Yak is the only person who makes him feel at ease... FUCKING FUCKITY FUCK
this epsiode came for my whole existence and the next one... the next one is gonna have me on the floor THANKS!
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p1xiemeat · 6 months
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Trigger Warning: Rare Illness/Health Issues [wasn't sure if this need a tw but these topics make some ppl uncomfy so i wanted to be considerate anyway💜]
so a lot of ppl have been asking me why i don't post pics anymore or why i have barely been on social media compared to how i used to be. and the reason is i've been having severe health issues for a very long time. i can't even remember the last time i went more than a month without feeling nauseous, or actually throwing up, or just having headaches and stomach pain that are so bad i can barely tolerate them.
i've known for a while that i have gastritis, but my mom & my bf convinced me to go to a new doctor for a second opinion. after months & months of pure agony and feeling exhausted and sick to the point where i have no energy, i finally know why. i went to a specialist and discovered i have a rare illness called CVS (Cyclic vomiting syndrome). and i also am lactose intolerant which was amplifying my symptoms because i eat dairy products constantly.
i am going to be starting treatment for it and i really hope it improves my life and my ability to function because i am so tired of "living" like this. just existing has been exhausting and painful. i literally haven't been able to accomplish any of the goals i have because i can't go more than a few days without feeling horrible.
i already feel useless because i'm autistic and i have bipolar 1 and i'm waiting on disability payments to come through because i am unable to work with my disabilities. so my bf has been working and doing his best to take care of me and our kids. i just feel so horrible and guilty all the time. and i genuinely didn't know why i feel sick 24/7. all i want is to feel like myself again. and to do all the things i miss doing. i feel like i'm trapped by this illness.
i'm grateful to have answers and know what i'm dealing with finally. but after suffering like this almost every single day for so long its so hard to feel hopeful for the future at this point. i'm literally in tears as i type this. its just been really bad. i never do my makeup anymore or feel good about myself. i can barely move sometimes because the pain in my stomach is so bad or i get pain in my throat from vomiting for hours at a time, and then i get MORE pain from dry heaving due to not being able to hold down any food. and then i get random migraines and headaches that last all day as a result of all of that. its taking a huge toll on my body and my mental health. my depression gets worse during the winter season so when this started getting really bad it just made my mental health a million times worse. its literal hell.
but yeah thats why i haven't been online. real life is hard enough and i haven't been motivated to post because of the hell i'm going through or a lot of the time i physically CAN'T make content. but i'm going to keep trying. i'm going to do every fucking thing my doctors tell me to do because im so fed up with suffering. i promise that i will make content again and post the things i create and other stuff i used to post about before i stopped being able to function. as soon as i start to feel semi normal or at least well enough to do daily activities and complete even small goals, i will post about it. i'll keep u guys updated.
i appreciate every single person who follows me and my content, and all the ppl who keep checking up on me and wondering where the fuck i went. i love you guys so much💜 and i'm so sorry to all the ppl who haven't heard from me. if i can gain at least a little bit of my physical strength and health back, i will be so happy. i also am trying to get vitamins prescribed to me because im severely lacking nutrients but they are so expensive and i can't afford them out of pocket until i get my disability money. i'm also anemic and have to start taking iron supplements again. i'm just a giant ball of health issues😭 its actually ridiculous how bad my health has been. but i'm a mom and for that reason i will never stop trying. i will do whatever it takes to get better. i don't think my health could get much worse than it is currently. hopefully i didn't just jinx myself by saying that😭
sorry for the super long explanation, i just have sooo many messages in my inbox and questions that you guys send me that i haven't answered. i don't want to leave u in the dark. the connections i've made on this silly little blog mean the world to me. and everything i've been going through has been so hard to explain. but since i recently got a REAL answer as to why i'm suffering so much, i felt it was a good time to let you guys know what is going on with me. like i said, when i am able to feel somewhat normal again i will post consistently and re-open my shop too! it sucks so bad having a passion for creating but being too sick to even get out of bed other than to get sick in the bathroom. i've been to the emergency room more times this month than i have in the last 4 years. if i can overcome this awfulness i will not take it for granted. i will work harder than i ever have to create and share it with the world. but for now i just have to sit back and do whatever my doctors tell me to do and hope to god that it helps me 😞
#kh
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