#gertrude is such a pretty name woah

[nonbinarylocalcryptid]

MAG11 - Dreamer, review and stuff

Diversity wins! The guy who dreamed about your death is gay!

I was hesitant to write this one because I didn't know where to start. Not because it isn't good, I love every single episode of The Magnus Archives, this whole exercise (reviews etc) brings up a few questions to me, what's the point of consuming horror media if I am not scared by it? Can I truly review it if I'm not scared?

And, in relation to MAG11, is death scary?

Well, personally I find the horror genre intriguing, and highly dramatic. It's a dark fantasy that you won't have the chance to experience in real life (or at least, I hope so xD). TMA plays with probability, rather than impossibility, even if there are some fantastic elements in the mix. Every episode is a promise, or a threat, horror and fear would find you anywhen and anywhere. Not even the Dreamer is safe from this promise.

Can I review the hell out it? Yep, yes I can. I can be objective, and I can analyze how well constructed everything is. Have you ever reached episode 200 and made a relisten? Do it, you won't regret it.

Death is scary, is the only certainty in life and at the same time, is paradoxically, uncertain. Everything ends, that much we know, and Antonio Blake doesn't seem to think there's nothing after.

I always think about this quote from Doctor Who when thinking about death, maybe it's useful for you

(Transcript: Peter Capaldi's Twelfth Doctor in The Return of Doctor Mysterio, "Things end. That's all. Everything ends and it's always sad. But everything begins again too and that's always happy. Be happy.)

And talking about quotes, let's comment some bits from the episode:

"I’d broken up with Graham, my boyfriend of six years (...)" - Antonio Blake, March 14th 2015

Yes, yes, weird thing to remark, but hear me out: Graham? Graham?? Is the same Graham as in Graham Folger????

"It was there, sleeping on my friend Anahita’s sofa, in the depths of my misery, that I first started to have the dreams." - Also Mr Blake

Woah, take a seat misery etc, I'm this dramatic too

"I found myself standing atop the very peak of Canary Wharf and overlooking the Barclays building where I had spent so many hateful hours. Behind me I could feel the pulsing beat of the light that stands atop that looming tower; it thrummed through me and I could see the glow pass across my skin like oil but, try as I might, I could not turn around to look at it." - I don't know why it's so appealing.

I tried to recreate it with a screenshot from Google Earth and Photoshop, the result doesn't convince me but it's pretty close xD

"Lucid dreaming has never been a skill I’ve possessed, and I generally get swept along in the current of whatever runs though my sleeping consciousness." - I love it when horror characters get logical, like, uhm, this shouldn't be possible, sir, this is a Wendy's

"And by my estimation he had appeared about ten days before his death. I tell you this because I feel you have a right to know the sort of timescales that we’re dealing with here." - Antonio "may as well just roll with it" Blake

He is so chill about all of this, isn't he? Like, yeah, I have this weird ass powers, I figured out more or less how they work and hey, you're next

"I’m well aware that I don’t even know your name, and I have no responsibility to try and prevent whatever fate is coming for you." - Antonio "I'm doing it anyway because I'm that chill and cool" Blake

"At the very least, you should look into appointing a successor." - LMAO

" I have no idea if Gertrude got the chance to read this statement before she passed away, but if anyone comes in ranting about dreaming my death, then I very much want to hear about it." - Jon "anything is bs except Leitners and prophecies about my death" Sims, April 15th 2016

Sir, with all due respect, wtf

General overview:

Vibe: it's mysterious with a side of peace and quiet

Horror: spooky, just plain old good spooky

Audio: pretty ASMR in general

Humour: Jon, why are u like this

Score: 10/10

[grungnr]

Good to know there's no limit! Here are the names I've picked: Emily, Christopher, Josephine, Matilda, Matthew, Cynthia, Gertrude, Angelica. Hopefully that's not too much, feel free to choose whichever you like the most <3

E - Emily by New Rules

M - Maniac by Conan Gray

I - Ice Queen by Baekhyun

L - Love of My Life by Queen

Y - Yeah Right by Joji

C - Crawl by Breaking Benjamin

H - Have Faith in Me by A Day To Remember

R - Rotting by Green Day

I - Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls

S - Supersonic by Oasis

T - Tomorrow Comes Today by Gorillaz

O - Odchodząc by Republika

P - Polly by Nirvana

H - Happy Alone by Kings of Leon

E - Edge of the World by Faith No More

R - Ryd by Steve Lacy

J - Janie's Got a Gun by Aerosmith

O - Ordinary by Like a Storm

S - Starlight by Written By Wolves

E - Everything's Cool by Lit

P - Paradox by August Burns Red

H - High School Reunion by Nerf Harder

I - I'd Rather Drown by Set It Off

N - Negative Nancy by Adore Delano

E - Everytime by boy pablo

M - Miranda Beach by COIN

A - Alone by Heart

T - The River by Good Charlotte

I - In Between by Beartooth

L - Like a Stone by Audioslave

D - Dead to Me by Kali Uchis

A - And It Spread by The Avett Brothers

M - Maneater by Daryl Hall & John Oats

A - Artificial Love by EXO

T - Troubled Mind by Cannibal Kids

T - Televisions by Current Joys

H - Holidays In The Sun by Sex Pistols

E - Elephant by Tame Impala

W - We Didn't Start The Fire by Billy Joel

C - Creating God by Avenged Sevenfold

Y - You Don't Own Me by Lesley Gore

N - Now Or Never by Godsmack

T - Trauma by Seventeen

H - Heart Of Glass by Blondie

I - In Bloom by Neck Deep

A - Answer by Ateez

G - Given Up by Linkin Park

E - Everybody Wants To Rule The World by Tears For Fears

R - Real Love by rei brown

T - Talk Me Down by Troye Sivan

R - RED by The Rose

U - Uptown Girl by Billy Joel

D - (I Just) Died In Your Arms by Cutting Crew

E - Englishman In New York by Sting

A - Artistic Groove by Taemin

N - Nightmares by Palaye Royale

G - Green Eyes by Coldplay

E - Earfquake by Tyler, The Creator

L - Lemon Tree by Fools Garden

I - I Need You by Saving Abel

C - Careless Whisper by George Michael

A - Awesome by N.Flying

[smallestclowninthecircus]

Season 3 notes popping off

due to my desire to not completely fail all my classes this year i made myself slow down significantly while listening to this season, and the fact that the other person i'm listening along with had to catch up. We've managed to convert several other people to start listening and its pretty great.

ep 81: what does it even mean to be chosen by one of them? And if he was chosen by the eye. we know Gertrude wasnt? Because she cut the eyes out of the magazines?

ep 82: elias lmao. I understand why people like him so much bahshdhdk i thought he was gonna snitch on Jon but he didnt so he's fine. Ok but how do we think he knew all that stuff. Idk probably just institute connections. I love the fact that the recorder just wants to record stuff randomly bjahsjdhd. Elias feels a lot like Michael in the sense that he knows more than he should and talks in a way that implies he just wants to wait and see how things play out for his own benefit. I understand him knowing the things that happened but his description of her emotions implies something paranormal. Maybe he's connected to one of the entities. Which one I cannot guess.

ep 83: did a file get delivered randomly to the place he's staying at? Probably elias lmao. He thinks the mannequin is related to the stranger. Idk I would believe it.

ep 84: worms? I know he says earth worms but idk. Again? Is she making gordon golems out of trash? Martin popping off. You can tell the statements get to him more that they get to Jon. How come martin is so mad about it? I want to assume he just doesnt want her to get stuck there but idk. Jude Perry. The calliope organ. Jon heard a circus in one of the last episodes

ep 89: he's talking to perry? Like jude Perry? He says ... God? Is that what it is? Lmao. The Desolation. Jon is tired of ppl being vague and not telling him stuff lmao. Oh God Jon is so confused. Compel her? Is she assuming he has some kind of power? Does he have powers? Hmm. im agreeing with jon here please jesus christ why does everyone have to be so cryptic. Just say what you mean. "maybe you get an itchy eye" bahasjkdfklsjdf girl what. Agnes saved her? Oh this is the girl from the cafe story? So theres the Cult of the Lightless Flame? They worship whatever entity this is? The Desolation? Why do they all seem like they sorta worship her then? Is Gretchen gonna die oh god. fuckin michael. a different michael aaah. i see. dont do it shes gonna burn you. sir. please. sir dont you dare do- WHAT DID I SAY what did you think was gonna happen hhh.

ep 90: try to make it less obvious you're trying to get fired big T. Elias that doesnt sound like the most healthy thing to do. oh dear is this gonna be triggering for me. uuuuuh. uuuuuuuuuh. doesnt seem like it ok gonna keep listening. Jared. hmmmmm. Ok we've seen Keay and hotner or whatever his name was.

ep 91: Michael Crew. Oh is this the lightning scar guy. Mister jon sir did you just die. No? God everyone is so fuckin cryptic. Say normal things please. They all just like to go on about pain and agony and j e s u s c h r i s t we get it you got hurted by whatever thing. So theyre avatars? question mark? Jude Perry is an avatar of The Desolation? hhhh fractals. thats a spiral thing innit. Yup. messing with your perceptions. God they all talk about feeding their god and feeding that which feeds them and. hh what does that meann. Leave big J. please. uh oh. is it daisy? how come he has the web lighter still? the tape recorder just turns on sometimes you know how it is. So he can compel people? not that he knows it obviously but. a bit wack. powers go brr i guess? If the eye just wants knowledge i guess he feeds it by getting the statements? b/c i doubt it wants him to murder ppl or whatever.

ep 92: elias you all knowing fuck what do you know. (i guess all given what i just said) Lukas. Heard of them before. Mordecai Lukas. Loneliness. The lonely even. Jonah Magnus. Elias ur sounding like a bit of a dickhead rn. lmao jon's just like "i dont care" elias what is ur deal. Why does he want to tie her in. ohh i see. lmao theyre all just like "elias why" The Unknowing lol seems very much like something the eye wouldnt like. lol elias is gettin all philosophical. what does it really mean to be human. this still doesnt answer why gertrude wanted to destroy the archives tho.

ep 93: bahsjdfh he seems so dead inside rip. awww admiral. i love him already. ghh breacon and hope. purple mold. doesnt sound like anything we've seen so far. I think the funniest explanation for breacon and hope is that they dont actually serve the stranger they just kinda happen to be a random neutral party that cart around random spooky entity related stuff. ooooh. when we hear the slight static of the tape recorder it's cuz he's compelling ppl.

ep 94: the end! listen man they were all just grayed up for 4/13.

ep 95: the end also? death but also savagery/ animalistic shit. aww martin. lmao becerra. she's just been chillin in the corner.

ep 96: return to sender. haha minecraft go brr. prediction: breacon and hope? yup there we go. jon why is there an echo. are you in a stairwell? is he gonna eat it- yup. how did i call it. unsure abt what theyre talking about but ok. they kidnapped someone? Sarah Baldwin. ooooh that guy.

ok im just putting this here so i have notes for when nicholas gets to this part. It seems like (from jon's conversation with jude perry) that the desolation and the eye are kinda at odds with eachother? like i guess not directly but it seems like they dont really vibe? so how could be with both. Cuz if he has the heat powers and shit then we know he's an avatar of the desolation. but then why does he have so much eye imagery. also he got burned intentionally? like jude did when she went on her monologue about the feeling of burning? but then why did he wear the eye pendant. it stops him from being burned all the way which seems like he's not fully accepting the fire or whatever.

Nooooo I lost like a bunch of my notes rip. I keep forgetting to save.

Ep 104: tim gives a coherent statement without jon even being there. Ugh. Fucking robert smirk. Dont like him. Joey. Dont recognize the name. The show must go on. Clown. The spooky circus?

ep 105: total war... shogun 2? jon is just understanding languages again. "if i understood mandarin or cantonese" are you sure you dont big man?

ep 106: havent we heard this one already? mans in space? oh no this is just another episode in space. fairchild... uuuh. cant remember. oh! this is related to that! this is one of the ppl from the other side. sounds like a Vast thing. oh he's the one that the dude saw? but that guy didnt have a face... she's sorta like jon. wanting to dismiss the statements. lmao i love the workplace gossip. ace jon for the win! oh cmon elias dont be a dick. sunny meadows or whatever. thats the place we heard about.

ep 107: oh great is it jude perry again. Third Degree. bahahsdkfj she was arrested. sorry but imagining this old british lady getting arrested is funny. she was trying to resurrect him. using the skin book. he's not feeling well. jon take a nap. i wonder if this is what happens when he uses his powers too much. He gets into The Zone when he reads statements lol. didn't we have a burning train car in anothre statement? is it julia fairchild? bahahahs "kidnapped. Again." poor jon honestly. julia... about her dad. daughter of the murder shed guy? hunting like your dad liked to hunt or normal people hunting. oh hunting vampires!

ep 108: melanie has been suffering. poor martin peter lukas why do you have to be like this. can he not just use the front door? does he have to bother the ppl doing statements?

ep 109: how come he cut her off? kinda rude tbh. its either jon's influence or there was smth he didnt want her saying. is it gerard on the table? this sounds kinda like smth from one of the university episodes. is it the closed eye on the hand? yup. he's like one of the students! if the thing listening in is elias then... he can do that without the tape recorder yknow. plus who's to say it wont just turn itself on again

110: who wants to bet its a leitner?

111: Lukas related to The Lonely. I used to not like Gerard that much but i like him more now. but i thought there were 15? ohhh thats right isnt flesh newer? gerry for the win honestly. finally telling jon things.

112: lol "again" no one ever tells any of these ppl anything. tim and basira are just out of the loop constantly. music, like the war episodes. The hunt or the slaughter? probably the hunt. so Daisy is related to the hunt right? basira likes the reading, she's doing fine at the institute. daisy's getting worried...

113: it just turned on randomly. what is it lol. explossives! oh boy. why do they always assume he turned it on intentionally. melanie youre not making me like you that much. which entity is this about i cant tell. lol he was disappointed it was just the end. The title Breathing Room made me think it was gonna be about the buried but i guess not. So many of these entities deal with death but the end is one that deals in just death. it has no need for fancy deaths, just death is enough

114: more hilltop road statements? the tree. oh boy. ok the tree has 8 arms obviously theres the spider parallels. was she taken into an alternate universe? oh no. jon tries to phrase things so he's not asking questions. thats honestly good. "sometimes i was kidnapped" oh dear. they got gertrude. daisy ur so odd lmao. who wants to bet they dont know the tape recorder's running?

115: silaca? or whatever? antique man? meat grinder... related to the meat is meat episode? oh wow. they buy antiques from him. maybe dont antagonize this creature which can kill you?

116: lol theyre all just so done with elias. music? is it like the one band that if you hear them you die or wtvr. oh its chess? i am very much confused. mmm stranger go brr. gorilla skin? oh shit the dance. woah. this is so good. this is so gender. the words are wonderful. "you can just say tim" lmao trying to fool elias never feels like a good idea.

117: except elias lmaoo. oh shit. leitner getting some use for once idk. bruuh poor melanie she has been thru so much shit. martin you can just say youre worried about jon. lol he's so accurate in his jon impression. lol who was that. was that daisy? lmaoo. oop hi tim. oh god i hope tim doesnt die. i feel like i wouldve heard about that? but im not sure. destroying the source of knowledge is gonna be hard for jon. yay jon! you did a good thing. let him rest.

118: go off martin lmao. awww poor martin. oh god the tape gets that squealy quality and its awful.

119: woah. lots of things happening. uhh. POP OFF TIM!!

120: lmao elias giving a statement about jon's dreams lol. damn jon doesnt even get his own dreams? has to stay Watching even when he's asleep? f in the chat this man goes thru so much shit. oh boy its peter. lol martin my beloved. idk i dont trust peter.

[sephirothisaslut]

Misunderstandings

(A oneshot featuring Immortal!Cloud and Seph, confused neighbors, kids, and horny parents...Oh and they think Seph and Cloud are vampires. Hi-jinks ensue)

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Timmy isn’t a smart boy. Neither are his friends. Well maybe except Louis, but that’s besides the point.

The big kids told Samantha about this creepy mansion up in the mountains. And she somehow convinced the rest of them to accompany her to check it out. Of course, Timmy told them it was a bad idea. It was creepy. And besides, mom told them to be home by 5.

But then John just had to call him a wuss. Then when Samantha and Andy joined in, he slightly got mad but still protested their plans. And when Louis asked him if he’s scared, he just had to prove he’s not scared and he wasn’t a wuss.

So armed with nothing but flashlights, some sandwiches, water, and their backpacks to carry those things (Louis brought a camera, he’s so smart), Timmy, Samantha, John, Andy, and Louis went on an adventure to check the haunted mansion up in the mountains.

To call it a mountain is an exaggeration. It was more like a small hill. But it was covered in a dense forest. It was kinda steep, but there’s a stone staircase, so it was OK. The mansion itself was not that far from the street, but it can’t easily be seen with all the trees covering it and it was pretty high up.

Timmy gulped as he saw the Mansion come into view. It looked much scarier up close. “G-Guys, we should go. We already saw it”

“Why? You chicken?” John snickered at his friend.

“N-No I’m not! It’s just that it’s dark and mom said-”

“Oh come one Tim! It’ll be fun!” Samantha, ever the adventurous one, exclaimed. 

“Yeah and we can show the big kids we actually did it!” Andy pumped.

“I wanna make a cool video!” Louis brought out his camera, and started recording, “Don’t you wanna be in it?”

Timmy only stammered, and very reluctantly said “Fine! But only for a bit”

Samantha happily led the charge. Stepping unto the front porch and trying to open the door. But it seemed to be locked. So John suggested they try the windows. They circled the house then found a small window from what looks like a library.

“It’s called a study” Louis whispered. “It’s where you do stuff”

“Like study?” TImmy asked.

“No duh” John said, trying to fit into the window. But finding he can’t fit.

“Timmy, you try” Andy suggested.

“W-why me?”

“Cuz you’re the smallest, duh” Samantha deadpanned.

And so, Timmy found himself squeezing into a window. Landing on his face and groaning.

“Open the door for us” John hissed.

Timmy scrambled to find the front entrance in the darkness, thankful that he brought a flashlight. When he opened the door for his friends, they immediately looked around the obviously lavish house. Timmy, closing the door behind them.

“Woah, whoever lived here must be rich!” John quietly exclaimed.

“How much do you think this is?” Andy said, lifting a heavy vase.

“Can I see?” Samantha asked. But the vase slipped out of her grip, and fell.

CRASH!

The sound of braking filled the whole Mansion. The group stopped, surprised by the sound. Then froze when they heard footsteps from the second floor.

“Hide” Louis hissed.

Everyone scrambled to find a hiding place, except before they can, something grabbed Timmy’s arm. Timmy squeaked and flailed.

“Well well well” A tall figure with green glowing eyes looked down on Timmy. His eyes had slits for pupils, and pulsed like a snake.

Timmy nearly screamed.

Then light flooded the room.

“Sephiroth, you’re scaring the kid.” A blond man said, leaning near the light switch.

“Good” The man grasping Timmy was tall. He had silver hair, and he looked handsome. He looked like a vampire.

“Why are you here child? Where are your parents?” The taller man interrogated Timmy.

Timmy couldn’t make any response, still caught in the shock.

“We’re sorry sir!” Louis hurriedly explained. “We thought this place was haunted and we just came to check it out!”

The blond man snorted. “Nothing new there”

The man came closer, and placed his palm on top of the hand grasping Timmy.

“I’ll handle this” He tenderly said.

He then crouched to the ground, and kindly said “My name is Cloud. Now we don’t appreciate you guys breaking and entering, but we won’t do anything bad. I promise”

Timmy nodded shyly. “S-Sorry...” he timidly said.

“Lets get you to your parents yeah?” Cloud warmly smiled at the five kids.

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Laura wasn’t a good mother. But that doesn’t mean she didn’t try. After her husband left her with their child, she grew bitter. But how could she abandon her sweet Timmy. So she steeled herself, got herself a new house, a new job, and a new life.

She thought she saw everything by now. After all working in retail, even as a manager, was bound to expose you to some unbelievable stuff. But when two absolutely gorgeous strangers knocked on her door, she nearly had a nosebleed.

“Excuse me, are these your children?” A tall man with flowing silver hair coolly asked her. His white blouse shirt, unbuttoned till his pecks, fit him perfectly. And oh God those sinful pants.

“Excuse me ma’am?” Another man beside the door frame called. He was shorter, and blond. Wearing a black sleeveless shirt highlighting his abs pretty well, exposing his finely toned arms. And where do these guys buy their pants, holy shit.

“M-Mom?” Timmy interrupted his mother’s thoughts.

“TImmy! Where have you been? I’ve been worried sick!” Laura hid her blush in her concern.

“We caught them breaking into our home” The silver-haired man snapped.

“I am so sorry! Did they break anything? I can pay for-”

“No, that’s ok ma’am. They’re just kids.” The blond one reassured her. And Gods, Laura felt his smile pierce her heart.

“A-are you sure? I mean-”

“Please, ma’am. It’s fine. I’m Cloud by the way” The man, Cloud, extended his arm for a handshake that Laura accepted with vigor. “This grump here is Sephiroth”

Sephiroth extended his own hand, only nodding as Laura accepted.

“Oh! Would you like to come in for tea? I’m sure you’re tired”

“No thank you. It’s dark, and we must return home” Sephiroth rejected.

As Cloud and Sephiroth bid their goodbyes, Laura took a good hard look at the five children.

She looked at them sternly and just sighed. This was a mess. Well at least she got to meet the two hottest men she’s ever seen.

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The rumor mill was spinning as fast as a helicopter blade. One of the older women saw the mysterious pair of men herding five children to Laura’s house. The woman, Gertrude, was very prone to gossip. Thankfully, what she told the others was mostly truth, in part thanks to the children’s own accounts.

Soon, the community was buzzing about these two new mysterious men. They were spotted by Joe, the butcher, in the wet market earlier this week. Then Allan the 7 Eleven cashier the next day. Then Gertrude herself in the park.

Everyone described them as absolutely, almost devilishly hot.

Laura is now sitting at a community barbecue, listening to the rest of the adults share their gossip.

“Have you seen the blond? Cloud? I hear he’s single” 

“I thought they were married?”

“Ha! They had no rings I checked”

“Wow Bob, don’t you have a wife”

“Hey, I can’t order but I can still look at the menu”

“Robert told me that the taller one-”

“Sephiroth”

“Yes Sephiroth, works for the WRO!”

“Wow he must be one of those monster hunters then!”

“I think both of them do”

“I heard they built the old Mansion”

“That’s bullcrap, that thing’s at least 70 years old”

“Yeah but I heard it from Cloud himself!”

Laura just continued to sip her coke. She had to admit, she wanted a piece of them too. But she had only one love, and he left her. So she really isn’t too keen on taking some action.

“Laura, you know them right?”

“Yeah! Weren’t they at your house?”

“Tell us, are they single?”

All eyes landed on her.

“Er, well I don’t know” Laura nervously replied.

“Aww” The group’s shoulders sagged.

“Guess we’ll never know-”

“But I-I invited them to the barbecue!” Laura quickly amended.

At this, the entire adult community screeched. Voices with sounds like “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL US” and “I DIDN’T EVEN DRESS UP” and “HOW’S MY MAKEUP” were heard all over. Even Bob, who was already married to Jane, was fretting over the state of his sauce stained sweater.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Timmy and the others were watching their parents freak out.

“Hey what do you think they’re talking ‘bout?” TImmy asked Louis.

“I don’t know. Adults are weird” Louis responded.

“I bet it’s those vampires” Samantha whispered.

“Vampires?” Andy tilted her head.

“You know. The two dudes we saw in the haunted mansion”

“Yeah, totally vampires” John agreed. “Did you guys see their eyes? They glow!”

“But don’t vampires have red-eyes?” Timmy pointed out.

“Yeah, but how else are you gonna explain that” John huffed. “And besides, I heard from mom who heard from Old Man Jim, that they said they’ve been staying in the Mansion since it was made.”

“Yeah? And?” Louis raised his brow, “They’re older than us, big deal”

“Yeah but Old Man Jim said the Mansion was built before he was born!”

The group sucked a breath. Old Man Jim was probably the oldest guy in the block, maybe even in the town.

“But Old Man Jim might just be joking” Timmy shyly said, “He’s kinda old”

“..Maybe” John only grumbled as he ate his barbecue.

“I heard from Papa that Timmy’s mom invited them to the barbecue” Andy offered, “Vampires can’t walk under the sun, right? So if they come, then they’re not vampires. But if they don’t then they are!” She happily exclaimed.

The group only nodded at this plan. If they were vampires, then they will have to take thing into their own hands.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Laura continued to watch the others freak out. Several of them tidying the place, the others tidying themselves. And the few childless adults and couples left shortly to freshen themselves in the bathroom.

After a few minutes, most of them managed to calm down. Now sitting once more in a broken circle.

“But what if they don’t come?” 

“Shit, then I fixed up for nothing.”

“I’m sure it’ll be fine. As long as we have fun.”

“Jane, we all know you want ‘em too” Jane just blushed.

“Gods, Laura. Warn us next time, please”

“Joseph calm down.”

“Oh Shit they’re here!”

And true enough, a pair of people can be seen in the distance. One silver, one gold.

“Fuck” Bob cursed.

Everyone waited in anticipation. 

And as the pair walked closer to the barbecue, their features slowly came into detail.

Cloud was wearing a thin white shirt, lifting up and exposing his abs as he waved to the group. Sephiroth, on the other hand, was wearing a black blouse, unbuttoned till below his pecks. Both carrying plastic bags full of sodas, and chips. And both wearing black pants that just hug their legs the right way.

“Hey! Sorry we were late. Seph forgot to buy snacks the day before” Cloud apologized.

“Apologies” Sephiroth merely bowed his head slightly.

“That’s uh. That’s alright. As long as you made it” Jane gulped.

“You can set them down here” Joseph said, taking a few bags from both, lightly touching their hands. This action didn’t go unnoticed by the rest of the adults. Some just glaring at Joseph’s smug smile.

That day, Cloud and Sephiroth were properly welcomed into the neighborhood. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As the day progressed, Cloud and Sephiroth were finally left alone by the adults.

Timmy and his friends finally found their chance.

“Come on! Go ask them” John whispered.

“Why don’t you go? I don’t wanna” Timmy huffed.

“You chicken?” John elbowed Timmy.

“I-I’m not!”

“Then go ask them” John deadpanned.

“I’ll go with you” Louis offered.

“Th-Thanks” Timmy stuttered.

They sauntered up to the pair, and cleared their throat slightly.

“Excuse me? Mr.?” Louis asked first.

When the pair turned to them, they had a clear view of their eyes. They were glowing slightly, but they weren’t red. Neither do any of them have slit pupils like they saw that night. Must be a trick of the light, yeah.

“A-are you vampires?” Timmy timidly asked.

The pair could only look at them in bafflement. Then surprisingly, Sephiroth let out a burst of laughter. Cloud following with his own chuckle.

“What made you say that?” Cloud snorted.

“We- We thought- Your eyes-” TImmy tried to form coherent sentences.

“Oh, our eyes glow because of Mako” Sephiroth explained.

“M-Mako? But isn’t that acid?” Louis asked with wide eyes.

“Not really, no. You learned Mako can mutate things right?” Cloud continued, “And basically it gave us glowing eyes.”

“Oh!” Louis’ eyes widened in recognition “ Uncle Robert told me you work for the WRO!”

Cloud and Sephritoh could only raise their brows. Timmy looked at his friend for clarification.

“They’re the monster hunting group! They basically fight monsters!”

“Including Mako mutated ones. Though they’re scarce now a days” Sephiroth nodded.

“Really? That’s so cool!” TImmy looked up to them. Wow, they fought monsters!

“We gotta tell the others!” Louis bounced.

“Yeah!”

The pair of children soon bounded to share with their findings with their friends.

Cloud looked at Sephiroth. “If they think we’re vampires, wait till they see Vincent”

Sephiroth rolled his eyes, then leaned in for a kiss.

Several hearts were broken that day. 

[avatarofthebeholding]

MAG 167 Liveblog:

“THE WHOLE ‘CURSE THIS FLESH PRISON’ THING”

WOAH ABRUPT JUMP INTO THE STATEMENT THERE

ANOTHER ARCHIVIST

Emma...we get to know more about Emma!!!!

“Eric had always been a homebody.” Ok time to cry about Eric again.

So the Web DID touch the institute when Gertrude was working there...pretty directly too!!!

Was Emma a fledgling avatar?

ANOTHER assistant???

“There was a fire to Sarah Carpenter.” UM. Desolation’s gonna come into play here, huh?

Oh...OH. Her last name. “Carpenter.”

“Emma’s curiosity ignited.” MORE FIRE REFERENCES.

Add Sarah Carpenter to the list of minor characters I’m unreasonably attached to.

So the Web WANTED her to disrupt the rituals? Did it change its mind and push Jon to end the world for some reason? Or did Jon just take the wrong cues somehow?

I’m worried about the implications of the Archivist and her trusted Web-touched/influenced assistant...juxtaposed w/JM...

The imagery of the desolation avatar in the burnt out house...I can see it so clearly in my mind the descriptions are so good...

Ok. Only one assistant named Michael. Kept ignorant by an agent of the Web. I will DEFINITELY be saying more about this later. AHHHH.

“Gertrude went to the one person she was certain she could trust on the matter.” AGNES????

AGNES!!!!!

Oh...she was no stranger to being betrayed, huh? I actually kinda feel bad for her.

Why did she ask Jonah’s permission to burn Emma’s house down?

The Web/Desolation animosity continues to grow and deepen...the emphasis seems like its going to end up being VERY important. Hilltop road. Emma refusing to give the Desolation the satisfaction of fear. Yeahhh....

Ok Gerry wasn’t officially an assistant. That tracks.

“She worked with those who seemed useful until they were no longer so.” OK NOW I’M MAD AT GERTRUDE AGAIN

Gertrude worked with Salesa!!!??? On second thought, yeah ofc she did.

“Yes, Martin, you are my reason” AAAAAHHHHHH

Re: The conversation at the end about assistants being released when their Archivist dies: MARTIN BLACKWOOD WHY WOULD YOU ASK HIM THAT????? NOT OK.

[yszarin]

see below for excited yelling on Curiosity

- ever just get hit by the episode number and be like, woah? 167. I’m so proud. we didn’t used to know there were Entities.

- boundaries! boundaries good! 

- I mean, “very sad” is entirely reasonable, given everything that’s happened. I would quite often characterise my emotional state as “sad about Tim”. It’s not inaccurate.

- physical danger does not really feel very comprehensive given the current landscape, but hopefully it also covers, idk, psychic attacks? I suppose covering physical danger is good at least.

- straws are fun, Jon! especially with milkshakes, when they have the twirly ones? Martin would probably find you adorable with a straw like that.

- ah, so Martin is still concerned about Jon’s levels of monster, just not about the whole smiting the monsters worthy of being smote. good to know.

- OOOH GERTRUDE CONTENT. GERTRUDE ASSISTANT CONTENT. GIVE.

- Gertrude confirmed for best avenger. fiery avenger. I like a bit of fire.

- Angus does not sound likeable. I do not need to know more about Angus. sounds like he was one of those old white guys who had so much money and then no actual aptitude or instinct for any of it.

- Huh, I remember Fiona Law’s name. That she’d died? though that’s not exactly unusual given this canon.

- Oh my god that’s fantastic. Fainting so they can’t feed on you and then they just go off and sulk or something. I love it. may Fiona Law be an icon to us all.

- I also know Emma Harvey’s name but I am pretty sure I was just at school with one.

- oof Emma’s going to be a piece of work. I love how TMA consistently gives us these interesting female characters who are exactly as questionable as the male ones - it just feels so good to get to see female characters who are not the kind of female characters that I see everywhere else.

- “spontaneously locking doors were a sign of the supernatural” wow. Emma is truly awful. probably would have got on well with Manuela were it not for some incompatibilities between Beholding and Dark powerwise. can I ship that? I would like to ship that.   

- so. according to the official transcripts (Cheating Death), Fiona Law died in 2003 from complications following a liver transplant. those are. quite some complications.

- cobwebs!! I really really love this, the subtlety of it, and the way it sounds like the webbiness just sort of happened? and never really went further.

- ahhhh the book of astronomy, and the “reflection of uncanny constellations”, I am taking a moment to adore the star imagery. I love the Vast. 

- !! I am very glad that they met that once, and that we’re getting a few more reliable hints on Agnes’ narrative, given how heavily warped by perspective all the rest of it has been.

- Martin not being able to make it stop is interesting, it seems like compulsion has levelled up and now listening is about as optional as reading the statements themselves.

- I mean, I know the canon-compliant suggestion for Martin’s domain is the Lonely, but. I have a particular appreciation for Vast!Martin, and we all know that if there is anyone in this hellscape who wants Martin to watch over their domain (eyebrow waggle) it is Simon Fairchild.

- “yes, you are my reason” my heart

- guilt, more guilt of the Archivist! I am very curious as to what would have happened, though I don’t think there’s too much point in the characters themselves lingering over it. I don’t think Tim and Sasha would have killed him, although there are points where Tim might have maybe not put quite as much effort into not having Jon die - he was already not inclined to protect him by the S2 finale, only went down into the tunnels because Martin was going. pre-coffin Daisy would absolutely have killed him, and so would bullet!Melanie, but I think Basira probably not, not just to get out. 

- anyway! I super enjoyed this week’s episode, it was nice to have a break from apocalypse tour, and to get back to stories that are a little more personal. I hope we get a few more of them peppered in as we go on!

[the-magnus-archives-archiver]

Boatswain’s Call

Case: 0110201

Name: Carlita Sloane Subject: Her work on a container ship traveling to Southampton from Porto do Itaqui Date: January 2nd, 2011 Recorded by: Jonathan Sims, Head Archivist of the Magnus Institute, London

[Archivist (John): Look, Tim, I’d love to discuss this further, but as you can see, I have a recording to do.

Tim: Oh, come on. Look, it’s not a big deal. We just need to do a few of them again.

Archivist: Out of the question.

Tim: It’s just confusing if not. Er, like the garbageman’s statement.

Archivist: Mr. Woodward.

Tim: Yeah, so, you said that Alan Parfitt was reported missing... ah, in August 2009, which would actually be six months after the statement had been given.

Archivist: Obviously it should have been 2008. I misspoke an ‘8’ as a ‘9’. What does it matter?.

Tim: Well, someone noticed.

Archivist: Who?

Tim: Er, Josh Cole – great guy – he’s one of the students using our resources for a dissertation. Um... oh, and here, in Miss Montauk’s statement about her father’s killings. You refer to case, um, 9220611 as case, um, 1106922. Oh, and don’t get me started on the other case numbers around the Hill Top hauntings, they’re a mess!

Archivist: Alleged hauntings. And who honestly cares if I misspoke case 9220611 as 1106922? Another student?

Tim: Well, actually, yes. Um, Samantha Emery – she’s lovely – she’s actually doing a PhD in manifestations...

Archivist: I don’t care. It’s not enough that Gertrude left us with such a pointlessly awkward filing system. Half the time she doesn’t even stay consistent in her own records.

Tim: To be honest with you, er, I don’t really understand the system

 Archivist: Last three digits of the year, then the day, then the month. I don’t know why she did it like that, but I can’t change it now.

Tim: Oh... okay... Alright, so what happens if more than one statement is given on the same day?

Archivist: I... don’t know. It never came up. Was there anything else?

Tim: Oh yeah, just one.

Archivist: Good lord.

Tim: So, in case 8163103 it isn’t clear if Albrecht’s wife is called ‘Clara’ or ‘Carla’ ‘cause you keep switching back and forth...

Archivist: Well, I’m sorry if I found it hard to read a 200-year old letter, written in cursive by a native German speaker. Who complained about that one?

Tim: Oh, it’s, it’s not a complaint. I just noticed actually. Um, look I know you’ve been under a lot of pressure... it’s not a big deal, I just think it might be worth re-recording these statements.

Archivist: No. I don’t have time. I still have a mountain of haphazard statements to get through, not to mention that I need to keep this wretched tape recorder on hand just in case I encounter one of the files too stubborn to work on anything else. And when I do, I have to actually read the damn thing, which is...

Tim (BACKGROUND): Oh, woah, woah... woah!

Archivist: Fine. It’s fine. I just haven’t been sleeping much these last few months, what with all this... worm business. Which reminds me, if you do see Elias, tell him thanks for the extra extinguishers.]

Tim: Oh, yeah. Yeah, sure. It’s getting bad. I mean, Martin keeps showing me his tongue and asking if it “looks infested”. Um. So what do you want me to do about these errors?

Archivist: I really don’t care. Put a Post-It on the tapes or something. I’m not re-recording them. Now if you’ll excuse me...

Tim: Oh, yeah, sure, yep, I’ll let you get back to it. [DOOR CLOSES]

Archivist: Right. Oh, still running? Okay.  Statement of Carlita Sloane, regarding her work on a container ship travelling to Southampton from Porto do Itaqui. Original statement given January the 2nd 2011. Audio recording by Jonathan Sims, Head Archivist of the Magnus Institute, London.

Statement begins.]

I’ve been working the shipping routes for years now, so I know there’s plenty of messed up things can happen out there. You remember the old saying ‘worse things happen at sea’? Well, let me tell you it’s just as true now as it ever was. But I’ve never seen weird like I saw when serving on the Tundra. I didn’t even want the job, really, but I didn’t have a lot of choice. We’d just hit Porto do Itaqui in Brazil in late November of last year when the ship I was on got stopped because of ‘cargo irregularities’. I don’t know what it was. Might have been drugs, human trafficking, might have just been a crooked harbour master looking for a kickback, but it didn’t really matter. Point was I had to jump ship.

This wasn’t an easy thing, though. A sailor’s union should be recognised anywhere in the world, but when it came down to it, my membership of Nautilus, a UK union, meant nothing when I was trying to get a place on a cargo run coming out of Brazil. Didn’t help that I’m a woman. A lot of people don’t think shipping is a job for women. Hell, a lot of people who work on ships don’t think it is. You don’t see a lot of us in the trade, and every ounce of respect I got, some dick-waving asshole probably bled for. But that’s fine, I can hold my own, and it hasn’t been such a problem since I shaved my head. It was enough to keep me on land for a good few days, though, as I tried to find another ship to take me on. Well, that and my bad Spanish.

I’m sure I don’t need to tell you how relieved I was when I heard that a British ship had made port. The Tundra. Now at that point I was starting to get a bit desperate, so I was keen to go to the captain and just about beg passage. Screw my qualifications, if needed I’d sign on as a workaway. I could find a better position once I was somewhere I spoke the language properly.

I eventually found the captain in a small bar in one of the seedier areas of the dockside. I’d been told his name was Peter Lukas, but to be honest I wouldn’t have needed his name – he was the only white guy in the place. Even by those standards he was very pale, weirdly so for someone who apparently lived their life on the sea. He sat there at a small table, completely alone, drinking a cup of black coffee. He was staring into the distance, and didn’t seem to notice anything going on around him. I sat down opposite and coughed.

His eyes only moved a fraction of an inch to focus on me, but it felt as though the movement had the weight of a heavy stone door. Like a tomb. Don’t know why that’s what popped into my head, but there you go. I asked if he was Peter Lukas, and he said, “Yes”. I’d gone blank on what to say next, and it was then that I noticed the silence. I looked around to see that the place was now completely empty. Even the bartender was nowhere to be seen, and the only sound was the whir of the ceiling fans above us. The captain was still staring at me, so I swallowed my unease and began to explain my situation to him. I left out the part about the criminal possibilities of my last ship, but was clear that I was in desperate need of a new post. When I had finished, he was quiet for a few minutes. Then he nodded.

“We have one space. Report tomorrow. At dawn.”

That was all he said. And it was all I needed. The Tundra wasn’t difficult to find when I headed to the docks the next day. It was big, already stacked high with an array of colourful shipping containers. I wondered if they’d loaded it up overnight, as there didn’t seem to be much activity from the crane. It was early, and I was glad I was leaving Brazil before the wet season really got going, as the sky was threatening to break. Making my way through the dock I asked around until I was finally pointed to the mate. He was a short man, heavy set with a thick, black beard. His warm, brown skin was stained darker by a life working in the sun, and he didn’t smile when he looked at me. Around his neck, I saw a chain ending in a small brass ball and stem. It looked like an old boatswain’s call, an antique sailor’s whistle. 

I introduced myself, told him what I’d told the captain and gave my qualifications and experience. The bearded mate listened quietly until I finished. Then he shrugged, and said they were in need of an Ordinary Seaman, and I was welcome to the position if I wanted it. OS was a bit of a step down for me, as I’ve been pulling Able Seaman pay for these last few years, but it was a ticket out of Porto do Itaqui, so I jumped at the chance. The mate still didn’t smile, but he did offer his hand and introduced himself in a gentle Dutch accent as Tadeas Dahl, First Mate of the Tundra. I was surprised, as it seemed a bit abrupt to be leaving, and I hadn’t even had time to stow away the duffel bag that was my only luggage. Still, I wasn’t about to disobey the first order I’d been given on a new ship.

The Tundra was pretty normal. I’ve served on a half dozen ships almost identical to it, and I fell into my duties quickly. We set off almost as soon as I was on board, and it was only later I discovered we were heading across the Atlantic towards Southampton. I was very happy to find that out, as I had assumed we’d be making plenty more stops before crossing back to England. With any luck it wouldn’t be more than a couple of weeks before I was home, and those would be spent in maintenance, repainting and taking watches with ‘Iron Mike’, the autopilot.

So that was fine, but I did start to notice a few things on board which didn’t really seem to add up. The first was the crew. They were quiet. Very quiet. I mean, I’ve been on ships where I was pretty much the only native English speaker, and plenty of people prefer to keep to themselves. Hell, not being too comfortable around people is a damn fine reason to go to sea. This was different, though.

It wasn’t just that they didn’t talk much, they seemed uncomfortable with me. They’d avoid eye contact, and only barely acknowledge me if we were on a shift together. As first I thought it was because I was a woman, but then I saw that it wasn’t just me. They avoided each other just as much as they did me. Meals were always quiet, no matter how many people were eating, and there was no friendly games of cards or chat in living quarters. There was no real conversation in any language. It was like they were doing everything in their power not to think about each other. It took me less than a day of ignored hellos and grunted answers before I fell into line, becoming just as quiet as my crewmates.

The only person who spoke was Tadeas Dahl. The mate would walk among the crew, giving instructions and orders in a dozen different languages, as the crew scrambled to carry out his commands. He was just as composed as he had been when I met him, and it soon became clear that, if he had emotions, he kept a tight wrap on them. He would stride along the ship, his antique whistle swinging from his neck. He never actually blew the boatswain’s call, apparently preferring to summon the crew via the intercom or horn. It just hung there, its polished brass heavy around his neck. I didn’t see Captain Lukas at all that first week. I only knew he was onboard because every meal time the cooks would hand a tray of food to the mate, who’d take it up to the captain’s cabin. We never saw the man himself, though.

There was one crewmember who did catch my eye. He was a young guy, white and, from what I could tell, Scottish. I never really got more than his name out of him: Sean Kelly. He had the bunk opposite me, and we were on different shifts, so I would often see him lying there when I returned from my night watch. He didn’t talk any more than the others, but he also didn’t go around with that blank look on his face. He looked scared. 

There were other odd things about the ship, but hands down the weirdest thing, I didn’t notice until a few days out into the Atlantic. Now one of my duties was to check the deck containers were securely in place, none of the twistlocks or lashing rods had broken or come loose. It was usually just busywork – I’d never been on a ship that lost a container, though it does happen. This shift, though, I noticed something wrong. I saw that one of the lashing rods, towards the stern, had broken. And not at one of the ends, or the twistlock itself, but right in the middle of what should have been solid metal. From a distance it looked fine, new paint shining in the sun, but looking closer I saw that it had rusted all the way through. Not just that, but checking out where the rod connected to the container, it became clear that they had rusted together. Fresh paint covered up most of it, but once I knew what I was looking for I saw it everywhere. The shipping containers, all of them, were rusted in place. How could this have happened, though, if they were being changed over at port? How long had the Tundra been sailing with the same cargo?

I decided I had to look inside. Stupid, maybe. If it was something illegal, they might toss me overboard first and ask questions never, but only if I got caught. And I was just about sick of nasty surprises. 

I did it on my next late shift. I kept an eye on the rest of the crew and waited for my moment. I’d already marked out a ground level container where the padlock had practically rusted off. It wouldn’t be difficult to get it open. It was about 3am when I had my chance. I was alone on deck and the wind was howling loud enough to muffle the groan of the container’s rusted hinges. It took three kicks from my steel toecaps to get it open, but finally I was able to get the door ajar. It was so stiff it took almost all my strength to get enough of a gap to walk through, but finally I could see inside.

It was completely empty. There was no sign of cargo, or any markings or debris on the floor that might have shown there had ever been anything inside. I couldn’t believe it, a transport ship with nothing to transport? It didn’t make any sense. I managed to bust two other containers open, but they were the same. As far as I could tell, every container on the ship was empty. I was still trying to figure out what this could mean when I saw a couple of torches approaching. I almost panicked and ran, but where exactly was I going to escape to? The empty, uncaring ocean stretched out for hundreds of miles in every direction. So instead I swallowed my fear, and pushed the door careful closed, trying my best to hide the broken lock before making my way onto the deck.

I was met by the mate and a half dozen other crewmen behind him. He looked at me for a second, then nodded and told me to follow, then he continued walking. Confused, I headed after them as they made their way around the ship, silently collecting up or waking all the rest of the crew. I started to ask what was going on, but the glares I got shut me right up. Finally, when we had what looked like the whole crew together, we walked over to the lifeboat.

Now we definitely weren’t sinking, so I hadn’t really paid much attention to the lifeboat before, but now I looked at it, I realised it wasn’t what I’d have expected. Most modern container ships have a lifeboat that looks more like a lumpy orange blob than a boat. They’re designed to be quickly and safely dropped into the water and tough out whatever conditions the sea might throw at them. But this was an old fashioned boat, with oars and a winch mechanism for lowering it into the water. It didn’t even look like it had any supplies in it. Standing there in front of it was Captain Lukas, as silent as the rest of his crew. 

The Captain nodded, and one by one the crew of the Tundra got on board the lifeboat. I got on too. I mean, what else was I supposed to do? I didn’t know what was going on and no-one seemed to want to tell me, but I sure as hell wasn’t getting left alone on that big empty ship. So I got in and sat down, as a couple of the crew began to lower the lifeboat into the sea. A few others took up the oars, and as soon as we hit the water, they began to row quietly away from the Tundra, which floated, motionless.

The sky was clear and the wind had died down, so the stars reflected perfectly on the still ocean surface. All the lights on the ship had been turned off, so the world and all the empty horizon was only lit by the moon. As we rowed, I looked around my companions on the lifeboat. Everyone I recognised was there, except for one. I checked each face in turn, but I could see no sign of Sean Kelly, my scared bunkmate. Had we left him behind? Was he still back on the ship, sleeping away ignorant of the fact that he was now utterly and completely alone?

Almost as though he knew I was about to speak, Tadeas gave me a warning glare. The mate reached down and took the old brass whistle from his neck. He pressed it to his lips, and blew.

I have never heard a whistle sound like that. It was shrill, so high and piercing that I felt my hair stand on end, but it also seemed distant. Like I was hearing it from far, far away. I don’t know how long he blew that boatswain’s call for, but by the end, I realised we were surrounded by thick sea smoke. We should have far too far south for it, but it rolled and billowed around the lifeboat, obscuring the Tundra. No-one said a word, but I could have sworn a few of my shipmates were crying.

I don’t know how long we floated there, sat in the dark water, but eventually the fog cleared and the mate sounded the boatswain’s call again, this time a short, sharp whistle. We saw the Tundra, dark and still upon the water, and began to row back towards it. The lifeboat was painstakingly raised and the rest of the crew returned to their positions. Sean Kelly was nowhere to be seen. And I never saw him again.

After that night, the atmosphere on board changed. People talked, and you’d occasionally hear actual laughter on board. Games were played, people drank, and there was this sense of relief to it all. I tried to join in, but got dark looks any time I asked about Sean. At one point the third mate, a man named Kim Duong, told me that I should shut up and be grateful, as it hadn’t been “an easy choice”.

I kept to myself the rest of the way, and left the ship as soon as we landed in Southampton. I didn’t even think about my pay until it came through a couple of days later: twenty-five thousand pounds. For barely two weeks work. I don’t mind telling you, it was almost enough to tempt me back.

Almost.

Archivist Notes:

An interesting statement, though difficult to investigate any potentially paranormal activity, as there does not appear to have been anything explicitly supernatural occurring in this statement. A lot of strange happenings and implicit weirdness, but nothing that can be isolated as a ‘supernatural event’. There’s also the fact that even a casual search of port authority records shows the Tundra is a currently active cargo ship operating for Solus Shipping PLC, a company founded and majority owned by Nathaniel Lukas. In addition to such business ventures, the Lukas family also provides funding to several academic and research organisations, including the Magnus Institute. Much as I want to dig further into this, especially given certain parallels with case 0161301, Elias gets very twitchy when we look into anything that might conceivably have funding repercussions. 

It doesn't look like I’m going to be able to do any further investigations into this. Even though the official crew manifest for the Tundra has remained the same for the last ten years. Even though I can’t find any record of actual cargo being loaded or unloaded into it from any UK port. Even though Sean Kelly disappeared from the port of Felixstowe in October 2010, and his body washed up on the coast of Morocco in April 2011, six months later. According to the coroner, it had only been in the water for five days. Maybe I’ll mention it to Elias. Just in case.

[strawberry-possum]

🖊 ?

HEEHEE TY ALFA

I'll talk about my otb (one true blorbo) Venus (and by extension, Nassa), and specifically my tma au for them both.

Warnings for vague mentions of injuries and implied death (sort of) (I'd put this under a read more but I'm on mobile </3 )

Necessary backstory if you don't know tma: spooky shit happens. This spooky shit can be roughly sorted into several "spooky shit" categories. They have cool names like "the beholding" and "the desolation". Normally they're Evil but sometimes people can serve them and get Cool Powerups at the cost of feeding on fear and/or suffering. Also it's british so you get things like flats and colours

Necessary backstory if you don't know Venus: vae/vem pronouns, is a mechanisms oc (immoral space pirates, they have a mechanical body parts which is what causes said immortality). Vaer mechanism is vaer chest! Vae also has vines growing in vaer chest and it's a Fun Time (/s).

OKAY with that out of the way

Venus and vaer qpp Nassa are both living in a flat. It's a tiny shitty little flat, but it's theirs. Venus was able to get away from vaer parents, Nassa is in a better location for their job, it's good. Except rent is A Lot so Venus needs a job.

Then, woah!!! One day vae gets a letter in the mail from this super fancy place asking if vae's interested in a job? Boy are vae ever!!!! They even pay well!!!!

(spoiler alert it's the Magnus institute)

Vae gets in, and it's kinda weird bc yeah vae was good at school but vae never really,,you know, finished college, and vae is pretty sure that to work at an institute you need a degree or two? But vae's not going to question it. Can't afford to question it, in the most literal sense of the word.

And sure, it's hard sometimes, and other times it's downright weird. (No matter how pressed up against a wall vae is, vae always feels watched.)

But it pays the bills, and clearly vae's just being paranoid, and things are going well :)

Until :) a certain archivist disappears :) and a new archivist is promoted :) and new archival assistants are chosen :)

Venus becomes an archival assistant is what I'm saying here

Things go relatively normally, until Martin comes back after being gone for thirteen days. After that, there's this faint humming sound in the walls. No one else seems to hear it. It must be some sort of hazing thing, you know make the youngest, least qualified person lose vaer mind a bit, haha very funny.

One day though, the humming is so loud, it's a song, its screaming at vem to help it, please, it's so cold and alone, and vae is so warm, vae could save it-

Jon breaks through an "exterior" wall. Prentiss attacks. Sasha flees into artifact storage. Martin finds Gertrude. Jon and Tim are both Marked. Venus barely manages to break free from the song of the Corruption in time to survive the worms.

Vae doesn't know what to tell Nassa. When the humming first started, vae mentioned it briefly, and she'd looked so concerned that vae hadn't mentioned it again. After that, when the song had gotten louder, vae started staying later and later, until vae almost never saw her. It's only after Prentiss is dead that vae realizes vae hadn't had a proper conversation with her in almost a week and a half.

Vae's scared, going home. When vae gets home, vae thinks that somehow, Nassa is more scared, seeing vem so wrapped up in bandages and gauze that vae looks like a shitty dollar store mummy.

She doesn't ask. She trusts that vae'll tell her when vae's comfortable. She trusts vem.

Venus doesn't tell her.

Which means that, only a few months later, when vae hears the song again? Vae has no one to fall back on. Vae's isolated, alone, and the song is singing so sweetly of community and devotion. It doesn't take long for the vines to grow in and around vem.

And Nassa? She's angry. She's hurt, and betrayed, and confused, and a thousand other things she could put a name to if she really tried. Even so, she can't deny how worried she is when Venus doesn't come home, one night, then a second, and a third. She contacts the institute, and Elias is no help, simply says that he hasn't seen vem either.

He does offer her a job though. Says that he thinks she should have a lot to offer for the team, and maybe she can even find leads while she's working.

She accepts. Her worry has overpowered her anger, and all she wants now are answers.

[taxesdeathtrouble]

past Saturday night

so this is my unedited gertchase fic that i’ve been working on the past couple days because i’m obsessed

~3000 words

the title’s from Etta James’ ‘Sunday kind of love’

enjoy!

1. Its after a meeting when he realizes. The six of them are sitting in a circle at Timely trying to make a decision for once, arguing over who's house to go to first to look for a book they'd heard their parents talking about.

"Okay, how about we split into groups of two, check three houses, then get back together to check mine and Karolina's houses?"

Everyone nods, and Alex continues, "Okay, so Nico and I will go to her house, Karolina and Molly will go to Molly's, and Gert and Chase will go to his house. Set? Okay, let's go." Karolina stares after Nico as she leaves, only looking away when Molly nudges her shoulder. God, Chase is so glad he backed off; it clearly was never going to go anywhere.

Gert stands up, and of course he follows her out they get to their cars, then pause.

"Your car or mine?" Chase shouldn't blush, because that does not sound dirty, why did he even think that, what the hell.

"Uh, if you think I'm passing up a chance to ride in the fanciest sports car of the century, you are sadly mistaken, my friend."

Friend. That sounds nice. He wishes he'd never said that they weren't. He wishes that he wasn't so fucking stupid.

Because that's what he is, right? He can design gloves that shoot fire but not know when a girl isn't into him, not know how to deal with how he feels about his father, not know how to deal with liking Gert.

Woah, WHAT?

The wheel jerks in his hands, almost sending them off the road, and he decides to focus on driving instead of this- this revelation.

"Dude, be careful. Jeez, Karolina is a better driver than you."

Oh right, Gert is in the car with him. Shit. Can't he deal with his feelings in peace? He keeps his eyes on the road, determined not to look at her, her soft face and gorgeous hair that always looks good- he has to take fifteen minutes every morning to get his hair to look marginally fine, and she pulls a hairbrush through it and she looks like she just stepped off a Pantene commercial set. It's unfair, is what it is.

"Hey, I resent that." Okay, this is good. Playful banter is good. Not revealing just discovered feelings is good.

"Why? Don't you think she's perfect or something?" Oh, shit. Chase wishes he had spidey sense like that vigilante up in New York, then he'd know when he was about to get caught in a complicated bit of conversation.

"Not really. We're friends, you know? And I mean, Karolina is great, and everything, but.....I don't feel that way about her. At least, not anymore."

"Oh."

Yes, oh.

2. Chase doesn't like the way Gert makes his heart feel. The record speed pounding whenever they're alone, the way it feels like his heart is being squeezed too tight whenever he sees her with someone else.....it's almost physically painful.

Like right now. They're at Timely, helping each with homework, and she's flirting with some floppy haired barista while she waits for their drinks (sugar hopped coffee for her, decaf for him), which she'd decided would be a good incentive for him to work on his Spanish. She'd told him to look over his notes while she grabbed the coffee, but he couldn't bring himself to focus. Like, at all. He's pretty sure he hasn't taken his eyes off Gert since she got up from the chair across from him.

Predictably, as soon as she starting talking to the barista, Chase's heart started up the oh-so painful squeezing. And really, he could just look away. But she's just so bright. Smiling and talking and being  so irreplaceably Gert that he doesn't even care that it's not directed at him. Except, that's stupid, because of course he does. He's green eyed monster levels of jealous. If Gert were talking to him instead of that dumb barista and also could read his mind she'd probably say that that's his teenage boy brain talking. But whatever, Chase is actually a teenage boy, so, suck it.

Upon realizing that he's pseudo-arguing with Gert in his head when she is literally, actually, ten feet away from him, Chase gets up and walks over, plucking his drink out of her hand, and takes a sip.

"So I was totally hyped to see it , then- Chase. I was just about to come back to our table, you could have waited another minute."

"Yes, but then I wouldn't have this sweet, sweet coffee in my hands. Also, I accidentally took yours and that is a lot of sugar."

She snatches it back and hands him his coffee, giving him her patented 'you're a dummy but you're being really cute about it' look. At least, that's what he hopes it means.

The barista catches his eye, and, dejectedly, goes to serve a customer.

3. Gert has never looked more stunning in her entire life, Chase is sure of it.

She's walking down the aisle, the train of her dress trailing behind her, and she's positively glowing. He can see her hands shake as they clutch the yellow rose bouquet- Karolina had said that yellow represents eternal happiness, or something, so they'd gone with that.

All their friends are seated in the pews, dressed in their Sunday best for the (secretly named by Chase) Best Wedding Of All Time. Nico even wore a colour other than black, though Karolina had had to wager something to do so- Chase still isn't sure what.

She's in front of him, now, and the ceremony starts. They'd asked Alex to do the ceremony only a few weeks before the wedding (poor planning) but at least he was, for some reason, already ordained at 23 years old. He's ridiculously emotional all the way through, and so is Gert, in that way where she's trying really hard not to be too sappy. Chase already is too sappy, but he doesn't care; His vows dive deep into that sappiness, actually, and hers aren't much past it. Chase isn't sure when he started crying, but he just can't seem to stop.

He's so unbelievably happy.

And then he wakes up.

He wipes the tears away, and grabs his phone. 4: 23 AM. Dammit. He really needs to stop this. Since he'd had his World's Biggest Dumbass moment a few weeks ago and realized just how much he likes Gert, he's been having this same dream every night, with more details added on every time he falls asleep like a twenty car pileup of 'I have feelings for Gertrude Yorkes'.

He considers calling her, just to get her voice out of his head, but it's past four in the morning, there's no possible way that she's awake, and calling would just piss her off.

But then she's calling him, which is so unprecedented that he almost forgets to pick up the phone. He does pick up, though, because he does have a few brain cells still alive up there.

"Did you know that Molly has started making a harness for my dinosaur?" he can only kind of see Gert in the dark of her room on the video call, but her voice is somehow jittery and dead tired all at once.

"What, really?"

"Yeah, she wants to ride her. For fun. Ugh, sisters."

Chase stifles a laugh, and lets her go on about an argument they'd had today. He's glad he doesn't have a light on, or he's sure that he'd look ridiculously heartsick.

"Yeah, so Molly really wants to go see it, but I told her sitting in a dark theatre for a couple of hours just the two of us would turn us into sitting ducks, and she said not to overthink, but-"

"You're overthinking it?"

"Yes! And it's totally unlike me to be so paranoid, but after what happened with Alex....."

"No, I get it. If you want......I could go with you? To the movie? If it would make you feel better." Oh Jesus. Did he really just do that? Oh Jesus.

"Yeah, it would make me feel better, actually. Safety in numbers and all that, right?"

"Right." Oh god.

"Wait, Chase. What time is it?"

"About 4:40? Why?"

"Wow, my insomnia reaches new heights. Sorry for waking you up."

"you didn't, I was already awake."

"Bad dream?"

"More like complicated dream." She makes a questioning noise, and he realizes that he probably shouldn't have said that. Gert is definitely going to want to know what he's talking about.

"Uhmm, I should go, gotta get some semblance of sleep, bye Gert!"

And then he hangs up. Phew. That was close.

4. The movie theatre is dark, and kind of crowded. Gert is sitting in between him and Molly, who is watching the movie avidly. It's some overcomplicated horror movie that neither he nor Gert has been able to pay attention to. They've been quietly throwing popcorn at each other since the movie started.

"Guys," Molly whispers when a piece of popcorn hits her, "Pay attention!"

They turn back to the movie, a little guiltily, and attempt to follow the plot.

Ten minutes later, Chase yawns and stretches his arm back, back, back over the top of Gert's seat. It's, to be honest, the cheesiest thing he's ever done. Gert's shoulders tense, then she leans against him, just a little, and it makes him want to jump for joy.

He catches Molly's eye over Gert's head, and sees she's trying not laugh. Like, really trying (It's not working very well). He glares at her, tries to be intimidating as possible, but she's still giggling. Whatever.

He moves his hand, minutely, up and down her shoulder. If this was literally any other girl he would have kissed her by now. Gotten it over with, been together.

But she's not any other girl. She's Gert. Gert, with the opinions and snark and her own unique brand of perfect that Chase still hasn't figured out how not to be affected by.

He can't just make out with her, out of the blue and unprecedented. He has to let it build, let them get closer and closer, before he asks her quietly, softly, when they're all alone, if he can kiss her.

He knows that that's sappy, to plan out how he wants to ask her out (if he ever does),  but he really can't bring himself to care. He wants to have a plan, it helps him compartmentalize how he feels. Although that's probably not healthy, to be honest......

"Hey, are you okay?" Gert whispers. She looks concerned.

"Um, yeah, yes. I am. Why?"

She reaches up and softly smoothes her thumb over the crease between his eyebrows; His eyes fall closed.

She pulls back her hand, seeming to realize what she's doing.

"You looked worried, that's all."

5. "How long have you liked Gert, again?"

"About two months- wait, Jesus. I didn't mean to tell you that."

Karolina laughs. "Which is why I tried to catch you off guard with it. It's okay, though. I'm not going to tell her, though I do think you should." they're drinking together on Karolina's terrace, a break from all that's been going on. Unhealthy coping mechanisms for the win!

"Oh, no-o way. Nuh-uh. Not a chance. If I tell her, and she doesn't like me back, which she won't, because she at most only finds me attractive and thats it, it will ruin our friendship, which I don't want to do because then the group might get messed up, which we can't afford, because our parents are fucking murderers! Yeah!" he takes another big swig of vodka, and she follows his lead, though she chugs more than sips because she's drinking rosé in a can, the genius.

Karolina, bless her, moves past his mini meltdown to say, "Oh, she finds you attractive? And you noticed?  Where was this observant Chase Stein when you were convinced you were into me?" she nudges him, teasing. She's definitely tipsy, sober Karolina is too sincere about things to make fun of anyone.

"Where was he when I kissed you? Jesus, I was dumb."

"True, so true." they clink their drinks together in camaraderie.

"Hey."

"Hey, what?"

"You should call her." for a girl that looks so angelic, Karolina sure does have a devil's smile.

"No, I should not."

"Yes, you should, but if you won't, I will!"

She pulls out her phone, tugging off her bracelet and shooting into the sky before he can grab the phone from her.

She lies horizontal, three feet above him at standing height, just out of his reach.

"Gertie!! Hi, sweet cheeks, how you doing?"

"Uh, well, you're drunk calling me at 1 AM so..." oh Jesus, she put her on speakerphone.

"Karolina, oh my god, hang up!"

"Not until you talk to her!" he's trying to grab at her sweater and pull her down but it is Not Working.

"Is that Chase?" her voice is sort of crinkly through the phone, but it's definitely her. Chase doesn't have enough luck for Karolina to call the wrong number.

He sits down again. He's not going to get her to come down, and the alcohol is starting to make him dizzy.

"Yes! Here, talk to him."

"Oh my god, Karolina, what the shit!" he says as he sprints to catch the phone before it smashes on the ground into a million pieces.

"Heyyy, Gert."

"Hi? What was that?"

"Karolina just yote her phone at me and I had to go catch it."

"Did you just use 'yeet' in the past tense?"

"....Yes." he's drunker than he thought he was, Jesus.

"Do you need a ride or something or am I just Karolina's drunk dial?"

"He needs a ride!" Karolina says, swooping down and practically yelling into his ear.

"Jesus, Karolina, way to give me a heart attack."

"Oh, you poor, poor, baby. Anyways, Gert, yes, he would like a ride. It's late, anyways. We're at my house, see you then!"

And then she hangs up.

"What, pray tell, the fuck, Karolina."

Gert gets to the house 20 minutes later, parking in her parents beat up monstrosity.

"And that's my cue," Karolina says, getting up, "Bye, Gert! See ya later!"

Gert sits down next to him and pushes a bottle of water into his hands.

"So vodka, huh? I always thought you were more of a scotch kind of guy." she says as he swallows it down.

He puts the now half empty bottle aside and says, "I am, but I can't drink scotch out of the bottle without making a face. Vodka, though, I have perfected my reaction too, so I can drink and still look cool."

"Chase, dude, never once has anyone thought you cool. Come on, let's go."

"Okay, but I want you to know that what you just said was offensive and hurt my feelings. You're going to have fight for my forgiveness."

"I'm making sure you don't walk home, isn't that enough?"

"Hmm, maybe."

They drive in relative silence, save for bursts of quiet banter. When they reach his house, he grabs her hand and thanks her.

"It was really nice of you, you're so nice, thanks again." (he's still kind of drunk.)

And then, he does the unthinkable.

He leans in, slowly, and presses his lips to hers, softly, a whisper of a touch.

But he still kissed her.

He's halfway up the drive before he realizes what he's done.

+1. He wakes up the next morning and promptly freaks the fuck out.

Well, actually, untrue. First he takes an aspirin for his hangover. Then he freaks out.

Because, really, what was he thinking? He had a plan. He had a  specific way he wanted to do that. And then he went and just kissed her, out of the blue, unprecedented, exactly the way he hadn't wanted to do it.

She definitely knew he liked her, now.

Monday he goes out of his way to avoid her, even though he shouldn't. He makes sure he doesn't cross paths with her, and he makes it until he gets pulled into a broom closet on the way to fourth period.

"What the- Oh. Hey, Gert."

"......Hi." she's fiddling with the hem of her shirt, like she always does when she's nervous.

"Um, Gert. I want to apologize. What I did Saturday night....that wasn't okay. I shouldn't have kissed you out of the blue like that," he had a plan, "It's okay if you don't want to talk to me for a while, I guess."

She looks down, shoulders hunched. He wishes he wasn't responsible for her acting this way, wishes she wasn't upset.

"You know, in case my feelings for you make you.....uncomfortable, or whatever." Chase leans against the door, getting ready to flee the scene and recuperate on Mars, or something.

"Woah, you actually have feelings for me? Shit, I totally thought you were messing with me or you were just too drunk, or whatever-" He reaches out and squeezes her arm.

"Gert. You're literally the coolest, most unique girl I've ever met. I think you're gorgeous and smart and awesome and way too good for me. But I," he pulls back, "I get that you don't feel that way, and I'll back off. I promise."

"Well, you....you shouldn't."

And then she kisses him.

It's not perfect. It's a little messy, and he has to lean down so she isn't on her tiptoes. But then he changes the angle, and her hand goes in his hair as he wraps his arms around her.

They miss fourth period. Chase can't say he cares much, though.

FIN

[misssophiachase]

One Summer, three best friends, a fortune teller and a mysterious new arrival in town.

I Can See Clearly Now

“I can see clearly now the rain is gone, I can see all obstacles in my way.”

June 19 - Virginia

Looking back, Caroline blamed her unexpected discovery on boredom that summer. The temperature had hit a stifling 103 degrees mainly due to low cloud cover containing the heat and the girls piled into the car headed for the cool sanctuary of the movie theatre to catch the latest Nicholas Sparks adaption. 

Well, that’s what Bonnie and Caroline wanted to see. Katherine on the other hand preferred a lot less mush, as she liked to put it, and a lot more violence. Knowing her dogged determination, Caroline knew this was going to be a difficult argument to win.

They’d been best friends since they were six. Class bully Jimmy Johnson had been teasing Bonnie mercilessly and one day went too far, earning himself a smack from both Caroline and Katherine. The girls still maintained that their ‘time out’ punishment was more than worth it to see him return to school with two very attractive, black eyes. After that he’d never messed with Bonnie again.

Now here they were about to embark on their Senior Year of High School. All Caroline had ever wanted was to leave Mystic Falls but even now she was beginning to feel nostalgic for the only place she’d ever called home. Not to mention her best friends. They’d chosen not to discuss their plans for the following year, too scared to contemplate separating.

“Um, last time I checked the cinema is in that direction, Katherine,” Bonnie gestured behind them.

“Who needs GPS when I have Bonnie Bennett barking directions at me from the backseat.”

“Well, she does have a point, Kat,” Caroline chimed into the conversation. “Surely the prospect of Nicholas Sparks isn’t bad enough to make you drive in the complete opposite direction.”

“Ah yeah he is, that Notebook movie you guys made me watch has scarred me for life.”

“It’s okay, we promised not to tell anyone you cried,” Bonnie mused.

“There was something in my eye, I told you that,” she shot back. “Anyway, I just thought we could do something a little different today. You know given it will be our last high school summer and all.” The dread lingered between them for a while, each girl feeling the overwhelming sadness that came with that very fact.

“I’m almost afraid to ask,” Bonnie murmured, finally breaking the silence.

“You’ll love it, trust me.”

“The last time she said that I ended up dancing on the bar at the Mystic Grill in a tequila fuelled haze,” Caroline recalled.

“And look how much fun you had. Well, you know after the hangover subsided.”

“And the subsequent grounding from the Sheriff. Katherine, she was this close to pressing charges against her own daughter for public drunkenness.”

“Yeah those were good times,” Caroline drawled, raising her eyebrows. “Please tell me this little surprise doesn’t involve illegal activity of any kind?”

“You two really are boring,” she muttered, checking out her appearance in the rearview mirror. “But no this isn’t illegal, well not that I know of anyway. If I’m being honest, I’m not completely across the laws in Maryland.” The girls were rendered speechless just as the 'Thank you for visiting Mystic Falls’ sign rushed past their windows.

3 and half hours later - Maryland

“You brought us all the way to Maryland for this?” Caroline scoffed, throwing open the car door and stepping out before slamming it shut with a bang. “Some fortune teller called Madame Ophelia? I mean as if that’s even her real name.”

“More like Madame needs a new marketing image,” Bonnie murmured, taking in the run down, brick house with the makeshift wooden sign outside that looked as if it was going to topple over at any moment.

“Mock all you like but Madame Ophelia is considered one of the best mediums in North America. According to Psychic Weekly her predictions have proven to be eerily correct time and time again. Her services are highly sought after but I managed to get us appointments. You can thank me later, ladies.”

“Well, you’d think with all that talent she could afford to fix that rickety, front path and tame that unruly wilderness over there that kind of resembles a garden.”

“Come on, live a little,” Katherine pleaded, making her way up the path.

“I am not going in there,” Bonnie baulked. “I’d rather not live out a real life rendition of Hansel and Gretel.”

“Yeah especially without the enticing gingerbread house for added inducement,” Caroline joked just as a loud crack of thunder sounded out and fat drops of water began to fall from the sky. Usually the rain would provide some relief but given the temperature was still so high it only made the conditions more humid. “Just great.”

“If this isn’t a sign, I don’t know what is, Katherine,” Bonnie squealed, just as the rain began to fall in sheets. “Let’s just get the hell out of here.”

“You can but I’m going in and last time I checked I was the one holding the keys to the locked car, so it’s your choice to either get extremely soaked or come with me,” she teased, dangling the keys in front of them teasingly. Bonnie and Caroline regarded each other seriously knowing they didn’t have much choice and followed her inside out of the pouring rain.

“You like to be in control,” Madame Ophelia said to Caroline a half hour later.

It was more like a statement than a question and Caroline was entirely too dubious to properly reply. The inside of her house had been just as run down as the outside and there seemed to be a severe shortage of lighting except for the unmistakable glow emanating from her crystal ball as she peered at Caroline. Her dark grey hair was piled on top of her head in a bun, a coloured scarf wrapped over the top.

“I didn’t think crystal balls were real,” she scoffed, by way of response. “Much like this whole facade you’ve created here.”

“They aren’t, same as this ridiculous outfit. I just use these elements to add a little bit of theatre, people apparently like that sort of thing. I’m guessing you’re not one of them.”

“No offence but I just don’t believe in this whole thing.”

“I’m getting that vibe from you.” Her heavy set wrinkles even more so pronounced as she said it. “Katherine is very much a believer although I’m not entirely sure she agreed with my assessment of her future.”

“Don’t take it personally, she’s high maintenance,” Caroline snorted.

“Bonnie is very closed off although I think that had more to do with the fact she was so scared.”

“Well, you might want to look at improving your customer service then. Redecorating this place might be a good start, Madame Ophelia. You know, if that’s your real name.”

“It’s Gertrude but I didn’t think it had the same ring to it,” she smirked, playfully. “You could never be frightened, Caroline,” she smiled, knowingly. “In fact, your inner energy is extremely powerful. You’re very different to your friends.”

“Different how?” Now Madame Ophelia had her attention.

“You know what you want and aren’t afraid to follow your dreams,” she added. “I have no doubt you will be a successful journalist, in fact Brown University will be very lucky to have you in their class next year.”

She felt the breath hitch in her throat. Her lifelong dream had been journalism and Brown was at the top of the list. How did she know that? Maybe this psychic thing wasn’t so bad, as long as she was telling the truth of course. Before Caroline could ask about future job possibilities she continued. “But that’s not the most pressing future event I can see.”

“Excuse me?” What could be more important than her future career?

“I can see him.”

“Him?” She squeaked. Was she referring to a possible love interest? Caroline had always placed romance at the very bottom of her cluttered list of life goals.

“He’s foreign. Dark, blonde curls, blue eyes and lips the colour of deep crimson.” Caroline couldn’t respond mainly because she didn’t know what to say or what this all meant. “You’ve both been looking for each other without really knowing it.”

“Who is he?”

“Your soulmate.”

“I don’t believe in soulmates,” she uttered.

“You will,” she smiled, knowingly. “Now, I believe our time is up.”

“But,” before she could argue further, Madame Ophelia was gone. Caroline wasn’t sure whether it was an optical illusion she’d employed to add to the theatrics or whether she’d been wrong about her. The skeptic in her wanted to believe the former but something was telling Caroline not to discount her abilities.

Three hours later - Maryland/Virginia border

“Obviously Madame Ophelia knows nothing about me,” Katherine ranted. Caroline rolled her eyes from the backseat wondering when she was going to finally stop whining. This thing was her whole idea in the first place after all. “And when the hell is this damn rain going to stop!” The summer storm had been relenting and the water was beating heavily against the windshield as the sun was beginning to set lazily on the horizon.

“She said you were highly ambitious and were going to be an extremely successful Harvard trained lawyer. I’d say she knows you pretty well,” Bonnie offered.

“Harvard has been your dream ever since I’ve known you, Kat,” Caroline added, trying to ignore Madame Ophelia’s prediction about her mystery soulmate. She figured no one could get everything right. Brown was what she wanted not some unnamed blonde.

“That I can handle,” she growled, looking into the mirror at her friend briefly. “But she obviously doesn’t know my taste in men. Apparently I’m going to meet some serious, thoughtful and protective brunette who is going to change my perception of things.”

“How is that a bad thing?”

“Well Bonnie, serious isn’t really my type. You realise serious is just another word for boring, right?”

“Last time I checked it isn’t,” Caroline shot back.

“Only you would have memorised the thesaurus,” she groaned. “Whatever the case, Katherine Pierce is not interested in someone like that.”

“Woah, she’s referring to herself in the third person, this must be serious,” Bonnie joked from the passenger seat. “Oh sorry, pardon the pun.”

“It’s so easy to joke when you find out that not only architecture at Stanford is a sure thing but so too a cheeky, brunette that challenges everything you’ve ever believed. Maybe we should swap future, mystery men?”

“I don’t think our destinies are interchangeable.”

“Come on you guys,” Caroline interrupted. “Do you really believe in all of this stuff?”

“And what exactly was your reading, Care?” Katherine asked, slowing down as they entered the main street of one of the smaller towns on their route. “You’ve been reluctant to share so far.”

“It’s not important,” she murmured, eyes downcast all of a sudden. For some reason she’d been too afraid to relay the details given it would make it all the more real and Caroline wasn’t ready to entertain some guy who may or may not be her soulmate.

“Oh come on, that’s not fair,” Katherine argued, turning around briefly to send her a dirty look.

“Katherine, look out!” Bonnie cried, just as her car ran straight into the back of a black SUV. The jolt from the impact was immediate and Caroline felt herself repelled forward into the back of the driver’s seat.

“Ouch,” she moaned, finally coming to from the initial shock. “This is why I don’t like driving with you, Pierce.” The girls emerged from the car slowly to inspect the damage. Funnily enough the rain had all but stopped as they did. 

“It’s not my fault that driver was going like ten miles an hour which is like thirty-five below the speed limit in this area,” Katherine growled, rubbing her forehead. “I bet snails could drive faster than this grandpa.”

“Grandpa?” A stern voice exclaimed. “Not only do you run into me but you have the audacity to insult me too?" 

Although shaken, Caroline had to admit the stranger was extremely good looking with his English accent and in that fitted, dark suit. She was slightly relieved he was a brunette given Madame Ophelia’s earlier prediction about her supposed, blonde foreigner.

"Well,” she began. Bonnie and Caroline knew she was about to erupt in true Katherine Pierce fashion if they didn’t intervene and given the accident was clearly her fault they didn’t want to exacerbate the situation any further.

“How about we all talk about this calmly,” Bonnie interrupted, before jumping in fright. Another attractive brunette had approached flashing a cheeky smile in their direction.

“Grandpa is extremely appropriate, trust me,” he smirked, raising his eyebrows at Bonnie. “I have to drive with the guy.”

“Really, Kol?” He drawled. “Your immaturity never fails to amaze me. Could you maybe wait in the car while I organise the insurance details?”

“I was bored,” he pouted. “Anyone like to get a drink? I know this town is tiny but I’m sure we could find a beer somewhere.”

“There’s been an accident little brother,” another accented voice chimed into the conversation. “This isn’t an excuse to blatantly and desperately pick up women.”

Caroline’s blue eyes immediately flickered to its source. 

Dark, blonde curls, blue eyes and deep crimson lips curved into a knowing grin. Madame Ophelia certainly had impeccable timing and Caroline knew she could possibly be in trouble. His eyes searched hers before glancing at his brother lazily. “Can we move this along and just get to Mystery Falls already.”

“It’s called Mystic Falls,” Caroline corrected him tersely, trying to ignore the way those dark jeans and navy henley fitted him way too snugly

She’d only just met the guy but he was already wearing on her last nerve. She wasn’t sure if it was because he couldn’t get the name of her hometown right or whether it was the fact he could be her soulmate. Either way it looked like she wasn’t going to be rid of him anytime soon.

TBC?

[smallestclowninthecircus]

Tma season 2 notes baybeee

I made myself take several breaks so I could give my frie d who is listening to it at the same time as me a chance to catch up. Honestly just posting them so I have them saved somewhere but whatever.

ep 41: real graham wrote keep watching before he was replaced. Jon feels like he's being watched. But they werent replaced by things related to the eye. It's the web that's on the box that replaces them. Endless hallways and doors to nowhere. I bet nicholas will have ideas what entity this relates to. If it even does. They're like the tunnels in the one with the builder guy. Tunnels closing in etc. Also like the cave diving one. He's assuming it's just one

ep 42: so 100 gecs? (IM SORRY I LIKE 100 GECS BUT LMAO) so there's some entity related to music right? There's the piper episode and the 27 w/ the calliope. Ah yes, this season is gonna be the season of Paranoid!Jon

ep 43: section 31? fucking books. god no. smashed lights? cult lady did that. covered the lights too. she mentioned a spooky clown doll. thats not random.

ep 44: is this that same circus that got mentioned before? it is! the pipe organ! pop off organ! pipe off! mouth on the stomach! yes! mouths in unusual places my beloved!

ep 45: antiques! like that one ep!

ep 46: every time books get mentioned i sigh. hhh sus smells. it got brighter. I get the vibes occasionally that the dark and the eye are sorta at odds with eachother. GRRR BARK BARK LEITNER. ayyy ex altiora. entity go brr. which entity do we thing it is? my guess is The Dark. The book buyer's name is Mike. He has scars? Electricity? The childhood friend of the guy who got it later on perhaps? The Vast? its formatted like an entity idk. This happened before the other one. He got trapped in the wood carving. a win for the web lol spiders go brr

ep 47: did i hear spiral? ITS THE NOT THING FROM THE EPISODE WITH NOT GRAHAM "it didnt move, it shifted" is like the exact same sentence as before. ay john's starting to remember. the laughing woah thats weird. is "michael" one of the entities? "you make it seem like theres a war" supports my theory that theres a struggle between a couple of the entities. I said i thought it was the eye and the dark i believe but im not sure. its whatever entity michael is vs the worms? what did nicholas say the worms were again? The Corruption? still dont know which one michael is tho.

Had to take a break after that episode. smth about the quality of michael's voice makes me feel like im gonna slip into one of those states where it feels like nothing is real, so i got a nice cold glass of water.

ep 48: jesus ok this one's kidna corny. you're telling me love made the crowd go away come on now. Ur losing it big J. also shouldnt it be more sus that "sasha" is so unaffected by the worm incident/ finding of gertrude's body

ep 49: haven't we heard hector's name before? oh is he the crime guy? fucking jared... so it's a throat? chompa chompa. (it's just a little bit hot) the good part about these episodes is that we know whoever's telling the story isn't gonna die. even if it's a close call, they're not dead. hotworth? ok not jared keay. it bothers me how theres so many repeated names, can they not come up with other names? "sasha"'s computer is breaking... sus. Elias our favorite weed man! jon ur so paranoid lmao

ep 50: robert smirk, at it again. this is like that one episode with the old dude who locked his door. who said idle beforehand? was it smirk? fingertips. thats so weird lmao. bahahah tim

ep 51: simon fairchild. im sure jon will mention the name at the end i cant remember where we've heard it. this is just like the cavediving episode. a hand? there was a hand in the last one right? the scalpel! and an eye thing. she's trying to throw them off.

ep 52: thats the guy from before! with the hearts! god i hate this guy writing the statement hh. lights blowing, and brackish water. we know how this ends but its still tense. rainer? reigner? rain man. we've seen him before

ep 53: pls not a leitner. oh boy mans scratched out his eyes. rip skelly. why would gertrude have had this statement off the books? jon stabbed himself?? bruh im? big man are you okay

ep 54: cockney boys! ayy its our favorite delivery men. she cut out their eyes. she knew that the eye was a thing?

ep 55: oily residue like the retirement home!

ep 56: worms? no. spiders?? bruhh. aaah yelling :(( aww martin anyways yeah i called it about paranoid!jon he needs to take a nap and drink some hot chocolate and calm down for once please

ep 57: just remembered, i think theres an entity called The Lonely?? This feels pretty lonely idk. fairchild, lukas/ lucas, some spooky place in norway idk. "sasha" knew he was recordinig hmm suspicious cmon jon figure it out. Sasha and tom. hm sus. for records sake i feel liek i should note here that I did have it spoiled to me simply that that's not sasha, but thats really all. i assumed it was like the thing that happened to graham in S1

ep 58: i feel like i recognize the name eustice (?) wick. someone please tell me im not just watching jon's descent into madness over the course of this podcast. im hoping it isnt so but, (and pardon the dsmp reference) im getting real wilbur vibes from this one.

ep 59: oh dear ok account from the fielding house. swirling designs? Spiral time? oh boyy. oh wait! 6 inch hole in the middle! is it not a spiderweb type design on the table? thats what i had assumed but that description sounds more like a spiral thing. cobwebs is a Web thing. ayy nicholas was right! the box goes in the table! the place that she kissed him was burning. Raymond is an avatar of The Web and agnes is the burning one. Lightless Flame! Why did she save him? i guess she was against this guy eating ppl or wtvr but why was she at the halfway house then? I think she's like michael.

ep 60: the eye go brr

ep 61: breacon and hope once again. tom. sasha's boyfriend. vampires sleep in coffins. the guy just walking in seems similar to the mind control of the vampires

ep 62: bones! its that one leitner. is this mother keay? the mom of gerard? this is what happened to her right? her skin was found on hooks? oh yeah thats what i thought the pages are made of skin. yeesh. The End!! sounds like an entity. phrased like one, and i think i remember it. are the people trapped in the pages? or... kept?

ep 63: eaten by the darkness! cavediving episode! (just like eaten by the sky) did my brain make up one called The Vast? it feels like it should be one, and all these episodes have some similar description about their feelings when they do whatever chosen hobby they have. ok now this one kinda feels like the dark. lights going out and all that. ok so not really a The Vast thing, its more of a Dark thing. feckin smirk gah.

ep 64: dice! the death guy! the death game thing! the person tricked somebody else into becoming death and then they were immortal? but if the egyptians wanted to kill him or punish him or whatever couldnt they just kill him? it worked in the end when he had the person giving the statement stab him, that did the job and actually killed him

ep 65: finally jon is actually acknowledging something is wrong.

So we know Mary Keay was revived most likely with the book by gerard.

Gertrude was way more aware of the entities than Jon. mary keay referenced The End openly and she cut the eyes out of her magazines and all that which makes me think she was aware of The Eye

ep 66: please not buried alive pleeaase not buried alive. lukas of the tundra? didnt we hear the name lukas before? she wanted it to be difficult to find important files because that way bad people couldnt find them?

ep 67: agnes... the girl in the hilltop house? agnes poppin off!! he's really not gonna question how she knew where he lived?? oh no D: the tree. were they the ones working on the house? aww they kissi- OH DEAR. why did she kiss him? it seemed like she cared about him? also she could kiss that other dude on the cheek and he was fine, but maybe it was cuz she was younger? lightless flame go brrrrr.

ep 68: oh god books. yup its bitchboy leitner. mans said "this seems supernatural, its a werd book!" bruuh.

ep 69: heh nice. aw cmon jon listen to martin. gahhh spiders. is that the class we heard about in the other doctor one with the teeth apple? some kind of psych class? oh dear. fucking spiders. aaaah. web do be goin brr. it's like the girl in the homeless shelter! who made the guy leave and she took his bed.

ep 70: is this gonna be the book that mary keay had? Most likely a leitner no matter what. Oh boy latin. Why did it start in latin then become old English? I'm guessing people put them in the book? He cant burn it. Phrophecies go brr. He says eh it's a decade in the future it's fine. Its gonna have changed. Ayy called it. Just accept it, it's a magic book. His death is getting closer. Leitner didnt make them but just collected them? Gertrude burned the book! She burned them down there so no one would know.

ep 71: oh boy tunnels. Our favorite thing /s. is The Buried a thing? Idk this seems pretty buried. Oh dear he's trapped here isnt he. "Not enough space to move, never enough to breathe" is that from the computer episode? With the guy who uploaded his consciousness? Somebody living down there. Hmmmm. Guesses: tom, sasha's boyfriend. Gertrude herself? (Though I doubt it)

ep 72: sweeney todd moment. Meat. The slaughter? Idk we'll see what the supernatural part is. Meat is meat. Similar to the slaughterhouse episode. Is it fucking Jared I swear to God it better not be. Hooligan teenagers, you know how it is. Meat is me lmao. Is the kid gonna be in the freezer. Ok that's good. OWW. Oddly textured candles. Made from people? Human fat or smth? Tom from the meat processing plant!

ep 73: outer bay shipping. Bet it's a subset of breacon and hope delivery. The Dark go brrr. Uh oh mans is gonna die. Leo or whatever. Cult ppl go brr. The people's church of the divine host. Who is the divine host? Is it reigner or whatever his name is? I dont think Jon can quit tbh. Probably an anonymous tip but from who?? One of the entities?

ep 74: fucking teeth hhh. I dont know which entity is related to teeth. Spiral. Isnt the spiral an entity. It feels like it could be related to many things idk. Yeah this sounds like the spiral. Heart attack at 29? Jesus... michael! That's kinda what I was thinking. Sasha goin in the tunnels. Hmm sus. They move the floor. Wack. Bet its tom.

ep 75: Man with a lightning scar. Has one of the leitner books. The childhood friend of the one who first introduced us to leitner. Oh my god that sounds terrifying. Michael crew.

ep 76: scalpel? Hmm spooky. NotSasha... think jon think.

ep 77: another double! NotThem, The Stranger. Not related to the table?

ep 78: what was that at the beginning? Question mark?? Oh boy more NotThem. Decker... what is the deal with the table. Does it contain the creature? Fucking Michael. Bitchboi himself.

ep 79: yes pop off martin. Ugh fucking Michael just leave man. I hate that dude. New person. Hmm. No idea who it is.

ep 80: shitener himself! Ok sir tell us the entities. Ayy The Spiral. Ok we know what that one is. The Eye is the beholding! Oooh. The Stranger. Did elias just kill leitner? Popping off honestly.