#gimme a few mins

[thebigoblin]

play stupid games

tags: Established Relationship, Alpha Derek Hale, Attempt at Humor, Cheesy, Fluff, Derek Hale is a Softie, Implied Sexual Content

a/n: inspired by a reel on instagram. and the title is from Taylor's song "Miss Americana and The Heartbreak Prince."

read on ao3

The tabs opened on his chrome browser make no sense. Not one bit. But he supposes that's just a representation of his own mind, and his morbid curiosity, and whose fault is that, really? No one's. Perhaps his mom's — but no more than it's his dad's to have given him his obsession with everything non-sensical. His dad just has to find patterns, and really, maybe his entire problem is that he is the combination of two very weirdly specific people.

What was he working on, again?

He squints at the tabs. There's too many of them, the edges stuck together so close it's like one long continuous tab instead, but he can see the lines between them, even if deciphering which tab is what is proving difficult. He could have used separate windows, but oh no, all sane ideas come to him after things are said and done.

Seriously, what was he working on?

"What are you working on?"

"What the fuck!"

The sound of another person in the room, so close to his ear, hot breath on the left side of his neck, has him jumping and flailing on his desk chair.

Rough and familiar hands grab him so that he doesn't brain himself against the floor by falling right off the chair, and he curses, because this is his life.

Once he's sitting straight, he glares up at the smirking asshole beside him. "Fuck you," he says, with feeling. "I'm giving you a bell for Christmas!"

Derek's lips tick upwards, like ha ha, that's funny. Funny that Stiles thinks he could get away with that. "My birthday gift has to be something good, then."

"I'll show a good gift!"

"That's what I am saying, Stiles."

"Ugh, you're fucking annoying." He's still glaring up at Derek, the angle not kind to his neck, so he looks back down at the screen. Derek just moves closer, a line of heat against his side that has Stiles' anger nearly melting off, but no! He'll persist.

Distraction. Yes. That is what he needs, so he clicks his mouse rather aggressively and moves the arrow to one of the tabs randomly. The title of it hovers over the tab as he does so, and Stiles wonders what could have prompted him to look at a YouTube video of making a DIY skirt from old clothes.

"You would look good in a short red skirt." Derek says this right into his left ear, his lips moving along his skin, from the top of his ear to the bottom of it, and because he's obnoxious, Derek bites his earlobe, too.

"Go away!" He slaps at Derek's chest, but his boyfriend only laughs at his half-hearted attempts. "Nuh uh, you're distracting me and I- I have work!"

"What work?"

Stiles doesn't really remember.

"You forgot, didn't you?" Derek just laughs some more, his hands wrapping around Stiles' shoulders, and Stiles pouts. "Search something for me."

"You have your own smartphone and internet, Distractingwolf!"

"But I also have you," Derek states this, a smile in his voice, and hey, it's true.

Stiles rolls his eyes and mutters, "Sap," before asking, "What?"

"I want to check something, but there's a condition."

Stiles cocks his eyebrow, just like Derek does. He's been spending too much time with Derek, and it's because of shit like this: Derek likes to climb the side of the Sheriff's house, get inside the Sheriff's barely-legal son's bedroom, and spend time either glaring at Stiles, pushing him onto surfaces like the door and walls and the bed and kissing him, or making him do random internet searches that 99% of the time happens to be information of a new supernatural creature they have to deal with.

Point is, Stiles has been spending too much time with Derek, and he loves it a fucking lot.

"Condition, huh? You getting kinky on me, Sourwolf?"

Derek moves around his chair so that his bulging biceps and sexy, veiny arms — that he knows are there below the leather jacket and the henley because he's seen his boyfriend shirtless, even if unfortunately they haven't wandered down to pantless situations — brackets him between the desk and the chair. The movement also pushes his chair further towards the desk, just a little, and Derek's chin rests on top of Stiles' hair.

"Maybe." Stiles' whole body shivers at the thought of it. They haven't had sex, but Stiles yaps about it, thinks about it often. Wants to take Derek in his mouth, wants Derek to have his way with him. He wants, and wishes, for Derek to be inside him — pound him so hard he forgets what life is, just for a moment or two or more. He's seen the alpha strength, and it's too much. Perfect. "Stiles."

"You can't blame a guy for wanting to have sex with his hot werewolf boyfriend," he retorts, huffing at the reprimand. "I can wait until you are ready, and I will, but I can think about it, can't I?"

Derek doesn't answer him, just puts his hand over Stiles' on the mouse and moves it the way he likes it. Stiles wants to be that, a ragdoll under Derek's ministrations, and nope, he can't pop a boner right now. He wants sex, but he respects Derek. But he's also a healthy ninetenn-year-old young man, and there goes his dick in his sweatpants, chubbing up like a balloon being filled with air.

Derek opens up a new window and goes to Google, his free hand coming to rest on Stiles' thigh. Stiles' breath hitches.

"Stiles," Derek's voice is low, his sex-voice. They've never done handjobs, or blowjobs, or any real dick-on-dick or hand-on-dick or mouth-on-dick action, but they have done phone sex, and about 50% of Stiles' brain, at this point, is filled with how Derek sounds when he's turned on, commanding. Close to coming, post-pleasure. Stiles knows this voice, too.

"You don't have to do anything you're not ready to," Stiles says, and he means it. Derek's head dips down and he kisses Stiles on the neck, a silent acknowledgement — Derek knows Stiles won't force him. It's okay.

"You always say 'hot werewolf boyfriend.' Not just 'hot boyfriend.' Why."

"Inflection, alpha, that's a thing." Derek pinches his thigh, and Stiles lets out a small sound at the sudden action, then grins. "You are a hot werewolf." He turns his head, pulls with his own free hand, his left hand, the one not trapped beneath Derek's on the mouse, and has Derek's head turn towards him. He kisses him, sure once, sure twice, and third time just because. Derek's eyes are intense on him as he pulls back. "I like all of you. I'd shout it out of the rooftops of all the buildings in the town if I was allowed to, Derek."

Derek smiles, and Stiles' heart beats triple time in his chest, which suddenly feels too small for everything Derek makes him feel.

They stare at one another for one more moment, and then they turn towards the screen, the cursor having moved on the screen, evidently because of their absent grip on the mouse. Derek takes his hand back and Stiles misses the warmth, but he dutifully leans forward to type in Derek's enquiry of the evening.

"Stiles, kiss me if I'm wrong, but Dinosaurs still exist, right?"

Stiles' hand spams on top of the keyboard.

He waits for the punchline to come.

When it doesn't, he gets up, turns, flails at his dork of a boyfriend, who is grinning at him, cocky and full of shit, and punches him in the chest.

"I take it back. I don't want anybody to know you belong to me. Fuck you, Derek Hale."

"Actually, I asked for a kiss, and only on the condition that I'm wrong."

"Oh, you're so, so wrong, you jerk, and you're gonna pay for it."

Stiles has now pulled the uno reverse card and boxed in Derek against his bed. Derek cocks his eyebrow at him. "Oh?"

"Yeah, oh. You're gonna kiss me, like, a 1000 times! That was the worst pick up line ever, what the fuck, who is teaching you these things?!"

Stiles pushes Derek onto his bed and starts peppering kisses on Derek's forehead, his cheeks, his nose, his chin, and of course, his lips. After a while, Derek flips them over, and they cuddle, and then they lazily make-out until their lips are swollen and red.

Derek is asleep after that, and thank god for his dad's out of town police conference, and Stiles falls asleep, too.

And that's how Stiles completely forgets about his presentation due on Monday, which is a day after.

(Derek helps him with it, and they spend the whole of Sunday making out, cuddling, and trying to out-do each other with worse and worse pick-up lines. Derek wins, because apparently he is the king of those, and Stiles just falls in deeper, his chest feels even smaller, and his feelings for Derek just seem like something he can't possibly have, too precious and important and so, so much).

[hsika92]

today the USA grieves a great loss💔 rip king💔

[crowcryptid]

H

anivercery

[trainingdummyrabbit]

ohhhhhhh. ohhhh its over for you motherfuckers theyve added both an in-game and instrumental version of Song you are never gonna see me again

[jerswayman]

Can you pls gif Trent from the anthem today?? Pretty pls?? 🫶🏻

you'll never guess what i have open in photoshop right now! (yes i can indeed do that)

[thekidsare-not-alright]

dallon please wait to announce a tour I don't have the budget right now

[rigels-nigels]

Something I don't get is when someone is talking about things being expensive and then some americans are like, it's not actually a scary $125 guys it's actually only $80 which is still a lot but it's actually kinda reasonable for the item

And it's like no!!! It doesn't work like that!!! Just because it costs less in usd doesn't mean the person didn't actually pay that much!!

If you buy a mug for $125aud, and you live in australia, you're paying that in $125aud, not $80aud!! Currency conversion doesn't matter in the slightest for understanding because in practice it is functionally the same as paying $125usd for a mug in america!!

If I earn $15cad/hr, and someone in Poland is earning 15zł/hr, and they bought an item that was like 150zł, me converting that price into Canadian and being like it's actually not that bad bc it's only like $50cad :), it doesn't change the fact that that for them!! It was a lot more!! Like functionally that's the same as $150cad

Functionally 1cad = 1zł = 1aud = 1usd = 100¥

Like the only time currency conversion is useful is for figuring out how far your coin goes when used in another economy, not for understanding if an item is or isn't expensive for a person living in said economy

[euclydya]

okwell half of 15mg worked! eccept we slept in til 1! ok!

[t4ke-a-j0ke]

tally hall valentines day card that just says 'joe hawley'

[tauforged]

HOME FROM WORK!!!! our giant pacific octopus came out of her hiding spot for once everyone look at her isn’t she beautiful

[frostkisseds-a]

I’ll be local for a few more hours working on stats and responding to a few opens, so if anyone wants to chat/plot, I’m your girl! 

[harlowhockeystick]

prompts! I find it easier to send stuff in w/ prompts :)

You got it 🫡

[verymuchablog42]

#freeotto

[cottonlemonade]

omg this idea is so cute i love it so much🫶

can i have a medium, warm milk with honey to go for sunarin please?

Night Routine

word count: 509 || avg. reading time: 2 mins.

pairing: University AU!Suna x chubby!Reader

genre: fluff

warnings: none

request: fluffy night routine with your boyfriend Suna

“I wanna go home.“, Rin whined as he slumped over, face pressed against the pages of his text book.

You highlighted a promising title on your reading list when you replied, “No one‘s stopping you.“

Your boyfriend turned his head to look up at you from the desk, narrowing his eyes in pouty annoyance, “No, your home.“

Suppressing a little chuckle you reached out to run your fingers through his hair and he grumbled but relaxed.

“Gimme like two minutes to go over this page again and then we‘ll leave, alright?“

Rin closed his eyes and nodded, enjoying your touch.

In fact, he asked for another 5 minutes of you playing his hair before he let himself be pushed off the chair to get going.

The library was quite empty when you walked through the big lobby, Rin’s fingers interlaced with yours, his step eager to finally reach freedom. Taking in the fresh night air in deep breaths he pulled you along. On the way back to your apartment you stopped to get a bubble tea and then discussed what kind of take-out you‘d order tonight.

Now, everyone and their front yard cherry tree knew that Rin was whipped for you but only few had ever seen the extent of it.

It usually started in the elevator. He‘d be behind you and wrap his long strong arms around your soft, squishy middle, resting his chin on your shoulder - or uncomfortably on your head when he felt like a menace. On colder days he would wrap his oversized jacket around you at this point, but since the weather was slowly getting warmer, he opted for an extra tight hug instead.

Clinging to you like this you‘d shuffle to your front door and fumble for your keys while he did absolutely nothing to help.

Once inside, it took a minute or two, followed by a lot of kisses for him to let you go.

As per usual, he jumped at the opportunity to shower first, taking great pleasure in trying out quite literally all your bath products and coming out of the bathroom smelling like a sweet fruit smoothie, the towel wrapped around his head like you taught him. He ordered the previously agreed upon take-out while you took a steaming hot shower that was long enough to slow cook a medium sized country chicken, and then joined him on the couch for a movie and cuddles. After finishing up your dinner - pizza that night - you‘d decide on a face mask and take turns applying it for the other. Suna would snap about a dozen pictures of you both pulling faces under increasing difficulty as the mud masks began to dry.

Then you‘d go to clean your faces, Rin making a mess of the sink in the process.

As you both brushed your teeth, he combed your hair, toothbrush hanging from one corner of his mouth.

He‘d give your butt a playful slap when he was done, offered you a minty fresh kiss and finally shuffled along behind you to bed.

a/n: thank you so much for your request! Please enjoy 😊🌟

for requests see here

[caashmoneynae]

MY MASTERLIST. <- click here for more!

❦

QUICKIE.

METHOD MAN x BLACK!FEM!PLUS-SIZED!OC

SUMMARY: in which Clifford wants a quickie before Teja goes out with her friends. ✨

❦

"𝗝𝗔𝗭, 𝗜'𝗠 𝗚𝗘𝗧𝗧𝗜𝗡' 𝗗𝗥𝗘𝗦𝗦𝗘𝗗 𝗔𝗦 𝗪𝗘 𝗦𝗣𝗘𝗔𝗞. 𝗜'𝗗 𝗕𝗘 𝗔𝗟𝗥𝗘𝗔𝗗𝗬 𝗗𝗢𝗡𝗘 𝗜𝗙 𝗬𝗢𝗨'𝗗 𝗦𝗧𝗢𝗣 𝗥𝗨𝗦𝗛𝗜𝗡' 𝗠𝗘." Teja chuckled, adjusting her breasts in her black spaghetti-strap body-con dress, as Jazmyn giggled and Teja playfully rolled her eyes at her as if she could see her, pushing her brown silk-pressed hair behind her shoulder while she took in her appearance.

(A/N: pronounced 'TEA•JUH')

Teja's hair was styled in a classic side part as it flowed down her back and stopped in the middle of it, a gold 'T' necklace sitting around her neck while two medium-sized gold hoops rested in her ears. her wrist held a gold bracelet that her boyfriend Clifford had given her for her birthday last month and her left ankle held a golden anklet with a heart on it while her lips were glossy and sparkling with lipgloss and she ran her fingers down her dress to smooth out the ruffles in it, her slightly chubby fingers running over her pudgy stomach while she looked at herself in the bathroom mirror.

plus-sized or not, she looked good, and not even a hating ho could deny that.

"i'm sorry, T, i'm just so excited! i can't wait to go out and celebrate this promotion, i'ma get lit as fuck." Jazmyn smiled as Teja chuckled and gripped the hem of her dress, pulling it down a bit so it wouldn't expose her goodies.

"trust me, i know that feelin'. now can i get off the phone and finish gettin' ready?" Teja asked, raising a brow at the house phone, as she rested her hands on her hips and heard shuffling before hearing Jazmyn's voice.

"don't get smart with me, girl. but yes, you can. see you at the club, T!" Jazmyn exclaimed, enthusiasm in her voice, as Teja smiled at hearing how giddy she was and she let out a soft chuckle.

"see you at the club, Jaz." the call soon ended after this, and Teja's eyes scanned her appearance for a second time, taking in her glowy skin and laid hair while a small smile crept onto her face.

"man, i look too good." as if on cue with her soft words of praise, Clifford popped up at the doorway of the bathroom, and Teja looked over at him as she watched his brown eyes wander down her body.

"what you all dressed up for?" Clifford asked, running his tongue over his lips, as he leaned down to her and gave her a kiss, wiping her lipgloss off of his mouth while Teja smiled at him.

"my girl Jaz got a promotion at her job today and she wants me and the rest of the girls to go out with her tonight," Teja explained, a smile on her face, as Clifford slipped behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, his hands resting against her pudge while he kissed the side of her neck, "Cliff— uh-uh, baby, no. we not 'bout to do this right now."

one thing about Clifford, if he was in the mood, you'd know it. the first thing he'd do is kiss your neck, and he knew that was one of Teja's weaknesses, so he always used it to his advantage.

"you look too good for me to let you leave without diggin' you out first," Clifford smirked lowly, making Teja playfully roll her eyes, as Teja felt his hands caress her thighs and his lips inched up to earlobe, "let me just stick the tip in."

"you know damn well you ain't never gave me just the tip," Teja laughed, earning a chuckle from Clifford, as the male gently kissed her earlobe and Teja shivered at the contact, "you make it so hard to resist you, boy."

"good. that means i'm doin' a good job," Clifford chuckled, kissing the side of her face, as Teja giggled and rested her hands on top of hers, "just gimme a few minutes and i'll let you leave."

"a few minutes, Cliff?" Teja asked, emphasizing the word "few", as she felt Clifford's hands slide underneath her dress and she bit down on her bottom lip, her back pressed up against his broad chest while he peppered kisses on her shoulder.

"a few minutes, shorty."

—

"o-ohhh, shit! yes, yes, yesssss!" Teja cried, her left leg resting on Clifford's shoulder and her anklet grazing his earlobe, as her eyes rolled back so far that her irises were no longer visible and Clifford peppered kisses on the side of her neck, marking her with a few hickeys while he continued to slam his hips into hers.

to be blunt, this was their fourth round, and it had been almost an hour since they first started, but Teja was unaware of this. it's safe to say that Teja was right to be hesitant in accepting Clifford's "few minutes" of pleasure.

"oh, God, you feel s-so good, baby!" Teja moaned loudly, tightly gripping and scratching up his back, as Clifford smirked slyly and let out a low groan of pleasurable pain at feeling her nails dig into his back, his lips inching up to her earlobe while he gently tugged at it with his teeth.

"you sound so pretty when you moan for me like that, shorty," Clifford mumbled raspily in her ear as Teja's jaw slightly dropped at hearing his husky tone and her legs subconsciously spread wider, "i'm makin' that pussy feel good, huh, gorgeous?"

"y-yes! o-oh, my— ooooh, shit!" Teja squealed, her knee grazing her shoulder, as Teja's brows furrowed at his tip slamming into her spot and she suddenly slapped at his back, "right there!"

"right here, ma? huh? i hit that spot?" Clifford smirked, purposely aiming his hips to hit her erogenous zone, as Teja's eyes rolled back and she held onto the male tightly, high-pitched moans and cries leaving her lips while her nails dug deeper into his back and left behind battle scars.

"y-yes! oh, yes! aw, shit, i'm 'bout to cum, baby!" Teja announced, her legs beginning to shake, as Clifford kept his pace the same and continued to thrust her spot, causing her climax to come crashing down almost immediately after her outburst.

her juices cascaded down her inner thighs and Clifford's shaft as it coated the sheets, drenching them in her arousal while her man continued to fuck her through her orgasm. his strokes gradually decreased in speed and Teja whimpered feebly at the change in pace before weakly slapping Clifford's shoulder, making him chuckle.

"nigga, you only said a few minutes." Teja whined, her voice raspy and her throat sore, as Clifford let out a soft laugh and looked down at her, resting his forehead on top of hers before kissing her lips.

"You shoulda' knew I was lyin', baby, this pussy too good to only be in it fa' a few minutes."

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

okay i have a full free day today i've been fed and watered, all the beasts have been fed and watered, time to really go at this commission stack

gimme a few min I'm gonna post some warmups from the posts I've stored in my likes