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illneverrecover · 1 month

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god dammit i like it (M) | changkyun

➛pairing: Im Changkyun (I.M.) x reader ➛genre: card shark/gambling Changkyun, cocktail server reader, poker!AU, hurt/comfort, smut, angst, fluff (in that order). ➛word count: 9005 (oof) ➛rating: M ➛warnings: excessive alcohol use, cursing, dirty talk, very very soft femdomme energy, oral sex (female and male receiving), changkyun begging, unprotected sex, creampie, cock warming, very brief mentions of blood, more soft clown changkyun. ➛summary: One last game, he tells himself. Just one last game, and he'll have enough money to take care of you the way you deserve, to show you how much you mean to him, to give you the life that you want... as long as he doesn't get caught. ➛notes: My second time writing Changkyun and as always, it's for the one and only @taetaesbaebaepsae. She had commissioned me (back when I still did those) to write something based on the God Damn MV, and then patiently waited for me to get my life together. I thoroughly enjoy creating new ways to hurt you with your ult bias, so I hope you enjoy this one! I did edit this one, but just barely, so please be gentle with me. Let me know what you think! ➛song: God Damn - I.M | Habits (Stay High) - Tove Lo (Hippie Sabotage Remix) ➛tagging: @taetaesbaebaepsae @lvupmushroom @thiccasswonhoruinedmylife - thank you for letting me use your likeness for this, and for looking it over to make sure it would truly hurt Kristy's feelings. Teamwork makes the dreamwork, bbs.

He’s an idiot, but you already knew that.

The alcohol in his gut sloshes as he moves to stand, his glass painfully empty. Changkyun stumbles towards the bar, the thrumming in his head keeping pace with the bass thumping through the speakers of the club.

His eyes are glassy, faraway when he reaches his destination, the cup fumbling out of his grasp as he indicates to the bartender he wants another. The bartender looks him over, seemingly debating on following through with the request, but he turns to grab the bottle of whisky regardless.

Changkyun hates it. Hates that he’s so drunk, that you’re not here, that the guy serving him thinks he’s a mess. He knows he’s an idiot, that he should stop. Put down the glass and pick up his phone. That he should just call you and tell you he’s sorry for being such a moron all the time, and that he’ll listen to you from now on. That he does love you, and wants to take care of you, and he can fucking prove it, if you’ll let him.

But then he recalls the look in your eyes when you caught him – the disappointment, the pain – and he reaches for his now refilled glass, taking a swig before facing back towards the club.

He doesn’t deserve it – doesn’t deserve you, to provide for you, to do any of it. Not when he’s such a jealous asshole, not when he’s such a fuck up. You deserve the world. Someone who can really give you what you need.

Fuck, he wants to be that. There’s some moments when things are good, when you’re tucked into his arms in bed, sleeping softly beside him that he thinks he might be that – someone who can provide, be reliable, strong. But then he remembers your fights; his words of jealousy and anger, his avoidant nonchalant fake ass attitude, his fragile little ego shattering with a flick of your eyebrow and a sharp word.

So he leaves his phone in his pocket, instead slinking back towards his booth before dropping into it. It was easy to ignore his friends’ questions, to insist that he was fine, to pretend to be more interested in the tray of shots being dropped off at the table. He accepted the small glass, slamming it down before he could think about the burn, about the empty churning in his stomach.

It was easy to ignore his friends, but damn, Changkyun was tired of pretending he wasn’t fucking exhausted of trying to be okay without you.

It had always been push and pull with him.

From the minute Changkyun had walked into Yvonne’s, the lounge where you worked, you could feel the snap of electricity, the buzz of magnetism that pulled you to him. He would’ve stood out from his clothing alone; his lithe form draped in a bright red perfectly cut suit, shirtless under the vest to show off his tanned, broad chest. The combination of cut and color was lethal on him and he knew it, his dark hair swept back to allow the full potency of his sharp gaze. The group of men he was with were also impeccably dressed and attractive, but there was something about him that had your eyes following him, unable to look away.

Luckily for you, he had seemed to feel the same way.

His friends had gone to sit at the Baccarat table in Kat’s section, but he had stayed behind, noting which tables your body was sliding between as you delivered drinks before he made his selection at the blackjack table at the end of your section.

He couldn’t keep his gaze off of you, ordering more drinks than he was actually playing cards you were certain, but you weren’t going to stop a paying customer. The table he was at was pretty low stakes overall; the crowd was a bunch of casual players, but he had enough money to keep up with the table, so they were willing to ignore his flirting.

You were also trying to ignore it, playing into him enough to ensure your tip would be secure, but also knowing that this was likely all just fun for the rudely handsome stranger. And if there is one thing you enjoy doing, it’s having a little fun – especially while at work.

But there was something in the way he looked at you, the way that he spoke to you, that had you hanging on a bit more than you’d care to admit. You wanted to tell yourself it was just the fact that he looked like that in that suit – that his tattoos and cocky smirk on top of it all was just too much for you – but you knew it was more than that.

It was when you were dropping off his umpteenth cocktail that he finally made a move, his tattooed hand wrapping around your wrist to stop you and slide a piece of paper into your palm.

“When do you get off?”

You smirked, trying to ignore the sudden rush of blood in your veins at his skin touching yours. “Why? Who wants to know?”

His face deadpanned, his mouth dropping to a pout, and the juxtaposition of such a cute expression on such a lethal man made you laugh.

“I don’t even know your name,” you clarified, pulling away from his grip and tucking the paper into your apron.

“You could call me whatever you wanted,” he replies, voice low, glare fixed on you, “but others call me Changkyun.”

The same things that had drawn you to him also made you roll your eyes, his cockiness frustrating just as much as it was attractive. He insisted on waiting until you had finished your shift, ensuring that you made it safely to your car before reminding you about the paper tucked into your apron pocket.

“It has my phone number on it so you can text me and let me know what time you want me to pick you up tomorrow.” He had murmured, his face so close to yours that you had forgotten to breathe.

“Pick me up, hmm? Well aren’t we feeling awfully sure of ourselves,” you replied in a shaky breath, hating how much he was affecting you. “What are you picking me up for?”

“I was hoping to take you on a date, but if you have things you need to do - errands, work - that’s fine with me too. Just let me take care of you.”

It was as easy as that, the way he slid into your life. You hadn’t believed the offer, not really, but decided to text him anyway. You had some things to do before your shift, why use your gas when you could waste his?

But Changkyun was effortless, showing up in gray sweats and a black t shirt promptly at the time you requested, ready to chauffeur you all over town. He kept up with your teasing about his sad fuckboy music he was listening to, and let you mess around with his AC without complaint, like he had been doing it for a hundred years.

Maybe that’s how he broke your walls down – acting so nonchalant, while also being dependable, always showing up when and how he said he would, always ready with an easy smile and a light joke.

It could have been days, maybe weeks, but it didn’t take long for you to realize you wouldn’t be able to stay away from him. That you didn’t think you wanted to.

Which was a complete contradiction to what you had told him – that you weren’t interested in anything serious, but if he played his cards right, you could be convinced for an evening of fun. An offer he had declined, telling you that he would wait until you changed your mind and wanted him fully. An answer that had infuriated you to no end, but one that felt inevitable.

It was the 14th or 15th day of hanging out that he finally said the words, putting the feelings out into the space between you. His “I love you” came out rushed, as if the words had pained him, but the flush of his cheeks and shimmering soft eyes had you cracking, reaching for him to smash your mouth into his own.

The kiss was unlike anything you had ever felt; the intense rush of heat nearly choking you when his tongue traced the seam of your lips, seeking entrance. He groaned when you had opened, the feeling of his tongue on yours sending the kiss deeper, starved for each other. He tasted like whisky mixed with the faint hint of gummy bears he was always snacking on, and you were drunk on his mouth, drunk on him. You don’t even remember if you had said the words back, the volatile energy between you now snapped and now your full focus until it was fully satiated.

Changkyun slotted into your life like he had always been there. The familiarity of it soothed you, brought you a deep peace that you didn’t know you needed – but there was the other side of you, the one that had never allowed anyone to get this close, that was terrified of what this would mean. That knew letting someone in also gave them the power to break you.

It was always a push and a pull with him, an intoxicating desire to give in, to let your heart find a home with him – mixed with the fear that eventually, that home would be ripped away.

“Fuck,” Changkyun cursed, and your fingers tangled in the hair at his nape, tugging.

“No marks,” you reminded him, though you would be lying if you said you didn’t love the feel of his mouth at your throat. His tongue was laving at the junction of your skin between neck and collar bone, suckling it between his teeth before soothing it with sloppy kisses.

You had been pressed against the wall of your apartment, him latched to you like a man starving until you had coaxed him down the hall towards your bedroom, letting him push you down onto the bed before resuming his work on your neck.

“Mmm,” he acknowledged, though he didn't stop his ministrations. “I wish I could mark you up, make sure everyone at Yvonne’s knows who you come home to.”

You had let out a breathy giggle, eyes rolling though he couldn’t see it. His silly jealousy over the stares you got while working at the lounge was just that - silly, nothing of merit - and yet, you couldn’t help but play into it just a little bit.

“Oh yeah? Who’s that?” you whispered, using your hand in his hair to guide him to your mouth, only stopping his descent when he was a breath away.

“Don’t play games, sweetheart,” Changkyun leaned forward, nipping at your bottom lip, and your grip deepened. “We both know I’m the only one you’d let stick around this long.”

He was right about that.

Closing the distance, you melted your mouth into his, letting him take control of the kiss for just a moment before you tug at his head once more, dragging him down your body. He complied quickly, pressing small kisses into your flesh as you guided him lower.

“I don’t know,” you breathed, eyes hazy as Changkyun settled between your thighs, a groan leaving his throat when he saw you had forgone any kind of underwear beneath your skirt. “That one guy at table 7 was tipping really well, I bet I could-”

Your words were choked off with a moan as Changkyun dragged his tongue from the bottom of your cunt to your aching clit, giving it a singular swirl with the offending muscle before pulling back.

“What was that?” he asked, but he didn't wait for a reply, not before delving back between your legs. He lapped at your center, taking his time tasting you before he settled up near your clit, sucking it between his lips.

Any retort you had been working on died as he made quick work of you, sucking and licking until you were bucking up into his face, both hands tugging at his hair to hold him in place. He had become pliant beneath you, molding himself just where you needed in order to push you over the edge. Just when you felt like you couldn’t take any more, that you were going to snap, Changkyun slid two fingers inside of you, curling them upwards.

“Please, come for me, sweetheart,” he begged, murmuring against the heat of your flesh. “I want it so bad.”

His words were your undoing, and you find yourself doing exactly as he asked, moaning out his name as he takes you over the edge, his mouth and fingers working you through it in tandem.

You exploded, white bursting behind your eyelids until you were boneless, unable to do anything but ride out your orgasm at the will of the man in front of you. Changkyun made sure to taste every drop of your release, slowly sliding his hand away from you only to quickly replace it with his tongue to lap at you until you were shoving him away.

You wanted to make him feel as good as you did in that moment, wanted to return the favor, so you pushed him off of you and onto his back, switching positions to settle between his legs.

Hands tugging at his boxer briefs, Changkyun complied to your silent request, lifting his hips until you could drag them off. You were quick to palm his erection in your hand and squeeze, relishing in the hiss he rewarded you with, your thighs squeezing together.

“Please,” he groaned, and fuck did he beg so prettily. “I just want to be inside you already, let me be inside you, yeah?”

Teasing the head of his cock with your lips, you hummed, playing as if you were considering his words. The truth was, having a beautiful man like him pleading you for anything was your kryptonite, and you would give him anything he asked for as long as he sounded like that.

Taking a final swipe of your tongue over his sensitive flesh, you gave him a smirk, moving until you straddled him, hovering for just a moment. Grasping his length, you line him up with your dripping cunt, sinking onto him slowly, tortuously.

You may be giving him what he had asked for, but only because you wanted to, because you had deemed it aligned with your desires. Changkyun gave you full control over your pleasure, and you took it greedily.

Once fully seated, you moaned, hips beginning to undulate and swirl against his. Pressing your palms into his chest, you began to work yourself over him, sliding back and forth until you were panting, thighs burning.

His eyes searched yours, waiting for permission before he did anything more than take what you were giving him. “Fuck me, Changkyun,” you gasped, voice teetering into a whine. “Wanna come on your cock.”

Changkyun didn’t need to be told twice, didn’t need any more instruction before he was thrusting up into you, pelvis meeting yours. His hands tugged you down until your chest was flush with his own, his mouth seeking yours and coaxing it into a filthy kiss.

“Fuck, yes, please come on my cock,” he rasped against your lips, his pupils blown as they make contact with yours. His gaze was intense, searing, but you couldn’t look away, didn’t want to. You wanted to be engulfed; consumed by him. “Use me, baby.”

Slamming down onto him, your pace began to turn frantic as he matched you thrust for thrust, each connection against your tender clit sending you further into oblivion.

“You feel so good, Kyun,” you praised him, adjusting until your face was pressed to his neck. “So good for me, so perfect.”

His answering moan reverberated in your chest, his arms tightening around you as his pace turned punishing, and it drove you crazy how something as simple as your words has him frenzied, falling apart beneath you.

Drunk on the power, you felt yourself hurtling towards your climax, nails digging into the skin on his back as he relentlessly slammed up into you. “Fuck, yes,” you cried, letting yourself go, giving in until you were over the edge, orgasm overtaking your senses.

It was too much for Changkyun; the way your scent was all around him, intoxicating him, the way you were moaning curses and his name, the way you were clenching so fucking tightly against his cock. Before he could stop himself he was chasing his high right alongside you, shuddering as he pumped his release deep, unable to still his hips even when you were mewling from the sensitivity.

Panting heavily against each other, you had tried to pull away only for Changkyun to roll you beneath him, pinning you under his weight. He was still fully lodged inside you, face nuzzled into the curve of your neck, his breath warm against your still sweaty-from-sex skin.

“What are you doing, Kyun?” you chuffed, making a feeble attempt to lift his weight before letting him resettle against you. It was all for show, the response he expected from you. The truth was you didn’t mind it - the feeling of him still inside you, the familiarity of his lips on your skin, the intimacy of it all - you didn’t mind it if it was with him.

“Just let me hold you like this for a bit, hmm?” he mumbled against your neck, and you hummed your agreement, letting your eyes fall closed. He pressed a few lazy kisses to your throat before his breathing became measured, even, and you decided joining him in slumber wouldn’t be such a bad idea.

“Promise me,” you murmured, voice thick and lazy. You were still naked and draped across his chest, listening to the calming beat of his heart. You had already woken and showered, deciding that clothes weren’t necessary before jumping back into bed together. That was several hours ago now. The smoke coming from his cigarette was curling up towards the ceiling, leaving a dreamy haze in the room.

“I’d promise you anything,” he replied quickly, taking a drag, “but what specifically am I promising you this time, sweetheart?”

“No more going to Kihyun’s high roller floors, Kyun. I know the pots are bigger, but you don’t know those men at those tables - not like I do.” You paused then, taking a shaky inhale.

Being in your line of work, you were no stranger to dangerous men, however you purposefully stayed away from serving on those floors of the lounge for a reason. Those men were the worst of the worst, and even if they weren’t, they rubbed elbows and served those who were. Either way, the money may be sweet, but the risk wasn’t worth it. You made better than you ever had at the lounge with the sections you served, and that was fine with you.

But Changkyun had always wanted more.

Ever since you had told him about your lofty dreams - the ones that you had saved for yourself in the darkest parts of the night, when your mind was racing and you couldn’t sleep - he hadn’t let them go. Truthfully, you always loved the idea of retiring your waitressing shoes and being able to finally write full time, working on the novel you’ve been imagining for years in some quiet home somewhere, tucked away from the world. But it broke you to see Changkyun willing to risk his life to see it come true by hanging around that crowd, placing higher and higher bets at Yvonne’s most hazardous tables.

It was strange for you to accept that he would even want to do this for you, to support you in this way, but he always knew how to soothe those concerns, promising you that he genuinely wanted to care for you before gently ribbing you to stop being so damn stubborn.

However, it was his stubbornness that had been creating a wedge between you.

“They’re bad people, Changkyun. And I don’t mean like - scamming old ladies for their pension money bad, either. I mean like extremely shady dealings with people who are involved with things that would get them sent to prison, bad.”

His free hand fell to your head then, smoothing your hair back as he took another puff of his cigarette.

“I know they are. I’m only just polite enough for the rules of the game, I never engage with them more than that. I’m not there for friends or connections, just the money.” He took a final pull before dropping the spent butt in the ashtray on the bedside table, his other hand moving to rest over the one you had placed on his heart.

“I get that, but it doesn’t take much to get on their bad side. It could be the slightest thing. Sometimes, just winning is all it takes.”

He sighed, but let the silence linger, instead letting himself get lost in stroking your hair softly. You were about to say something again, to make sure he had heard you, when he finally spoke.

“I just want to take care of you, you know?” His voice was low, thick with emotion, though he tried to swallow it back. “Give you what you deserve.”

That pain came back, the one deep in your chest, and you sat up to face him. “I know that. But I already have everything that I need, right here.”

You tap his chest once, twice - his hand still firmly resting on top of your own.

He met your gaze, giving you a small, cocky smirk, as if his eyes weren’t shiny with unshed tears. “What, you mean this hot body?”

You scoffed, eyes rolling. Maybe you should’ve called him out on his side stepping, forcing him to vocalize that look he had been giving you, but instead you fell back into step with your teasing. It was, after all, the familiar dance between you two.

“No, stupid. I meant you - you’re all I need. The rest of this shit is just noise.”

“I bet I can make you make some noise–”

“Changkyun–”

“Okay okay,” he laughed as your soft touch turned into pointed jabs into his chest, sitting up to wrap his arms around you and stop your onslaught. “I hear you, sweetheart. You’re right. I’ll stay away,” he said, pulling you up and back until you’re leaning against his chest, arms still wrapped tight around you.

“Promise me?” This time when you say it, you made sure your eyes were locked on his, made sure the fear you felt was evident behind the words.

“I promise.”

It felt like a sign from the universe. Well, either that, or a promise from the devil.

But sometimes, those can look the same.

The posting for Kihyun’s upcoming game had just gone up, but it was already making the rounds. Games like these were advertised in a certain way - you had to know where to find it in order to play, and the regular gamblers all knew the common message boards to keep an eye on. Changkyun hadn’t been looking for it, wasn’t even checking the forums anymore – but had gotten a text about it from Joohoney, a screenshot of the flyer accompanying his message of “Bro, did you see this shit??”

A high stakes game, in two nights. The winning pot large enough that he would be able to retire you permanently, and he wouldn’t be too far behind you, honestly. You were already off work that night, plans in place for a girls night with Kat and a few of the other servers, so you wouldn’t be at Yvonne’s.

It would just be one last time.

One last game, and with enough luck, he could finally give you the life that you’ve always wanted, provide for you in the way a man should. Sure, you wouldn’t like it – the idea of him going to the tables again – but that was only if you found out, and the chances of that were slim.

He could win the money and set it aside, give himself a week or two of regular games to make it seem a bit more feasible. A few days of being off your feet and back on your laptop would have you forgetting about work anyway, and the top floor of Yvonne’s would fade quickly away from your memory.

It had to be a sign. He could do it, could pull it off, could be the man that you deserve.

His fingers hovered over his phone, the reply ready to be sent to Joohoney. It would be just as easy to delete it, to tell him that he’s done with that shit. To text his best friend back and tell him that he can’t, because he told you he would walk away and stay away from those men. Joohoney might give him some shit, but he would understand, likely wouldn’t push the matter.

But the money…

It didn’t take long for Changkyun to do the math; it would take months at the regular tables to get this kind of money, and that’s only if he kept winning. Which didn’t seem like long in the grand scheme of things, but when he thought of how your eyes lit up at the idea of writing full time, made it seem like it was centuries.

You wouldn’t have to know. It would just be one last time.

He pressed send on the text, foot tapping nervously until he saw the read receipt pop up under his message.

“I’m in - one last game.”

You were mad at him again, but your friends didn’t need to know that.

All they needed to know was that you were in the mood for a girls night out, and if they knew what was good for them, they’d be there in their sluttiest outfit ready to indulge with you.

However, it only took you ordering the second round of shots to have Bri’s questioning stare fixed on your own.

“So, what did he do this time?” she deadpanned, sipping from her straw.

“What? Who? I don’t know what you speak of,” you replied. “I’m just enjoying a night out with my friends.”

“Sure, okay,” Kat nodded, giving a convincing performance of someone who actually believed your nonsense. “If he didn’t do anything, then why isn’t he here, buying us all drinks?”

She had you there. Changkyun was always wanting to show up on your nights out – not to crash them, but so that you and your friends could enjoy your time without having to worry about a single thing. He covered the tabs, made sure everyone was having fun, and ensured each person got home safely – all while staying tucked away at a nearby table until you needed him, never putting too much pressure on you.

It had pissed you off the first time he had suggested it, but after he showed you what he meant, showed you how he could be supportive in the shadows while still letting you shine, you had slowly given in. Part of you loved being able to enjoy yourself with your friends while knowing he was always looking out, even if he wasn’t directly visible.

“Maybe he’s busy.”

Twin glares pinned you to your seat, and you allowed several beats of the bass blaring in the speakers to pass before caving.

“Okay, fine, yes. We’re having a slight disagreement,” you conceded with a sniff, “over something that happened at work.”

“Wait a minute - is this about what happened with Vanda?” Kat questioned, mentioning the newest server at the lounge. She had only started a few weeks prior, but had been making a lot of work for you - constantly acting like she knew what she was doing in front of management, only to flounder and follow you and the senior staff around asking a million questions the minute they weren’t on the floor.

It wasn’t her confidence in her lacking serving skills that had bothered you, not really. It was more so how the minute she did get called out on a mistake, she was quick to try to throw you and your friends - the same people who had just been helping her ass - under the bus.

You had told Changkyun about an incident earlier in the week of this exact scenario – she was flirting with another customer instead of checking on the tables in her section, and a patron of hers ended up getting up to go to the bar to order a drink. It wouldn’t have been a huge deal, mistakes happen after all, except she had immediately told the manager on duty that you had promised to cover that table. Which was news to you.

“Are you serious? After all the help you’ve given her?” Changkyun had shook his head, irritation evident in his voice. “Did you tell the manager the truth? Who was on?”

You had smothered a smile at the question, trying and failing to hide how much you loved him wanting to know more about your life.

“It was Amy, and yeah, I told her. She believed me, but still. I don’t get it, I’ve never done anything to that girl.”

“Want me to show up to Yvonne’s and request her section with the guys, give her some shit? You know how annoying I can be when I want to,” he offered, brows raised in a teasing lilt, but you could tell by the line of his mouth that he meant it.

“Yes, I do know how truly annoying you can be. It’s almost like a super power.”

He grinned then, a full one, and you wanted to kiss his stupid mouth.

“But no, it’s fine. I got this. I know how to handle people like this, and having anyone else fight the battle for me will only make her more bold about it.” This wasn’t your first rodeo, after all - you had been serving a long time, and doing luxury serving at Yvonne’s for even longer than Vanda had been out of diapers. If there was one thing you knew how to do, it was handle people.

But did Changkyun listen to you?

Well no, of course not.

He did exactly as he had threatened - showed up the following day with his full group of rowdy friends, sitting in her section and dedicated to being the most obnoxious people Vanda dealt with all night. They didn’t do anything harassing or illegal, just toed the line of being pretentious drunk pricks gambling and drinking – sending back drinks for being made incorrectly, asking for complicated cocktails and shots, requesting a rundown of the entire menu before telling her they were no longer hungry.

Kat and Bri had found it hilarious, stating that your boyfriend’s malicious compliance of the rules while still making Vanda run around so much she was pouring sweat was truly an artform. And there was a tiny piece of you, deep in your soul, that was pleased at the lengths he was willing to go for you.

But you were also pissed, because you had been exactly right. It did nothing to stop Vanda from sending bullshit your way; if anything, it had spurred her on, the following shift of yours even more annoying and mind numbing after hours of her questions and subtle sabotage.

“Yes, it’s about what happened with Vanda! I told him to let me handle it, and he didn’t listen. I know he meant well, I get that, but still. He didn’t listen.” You had known his heart was in the right place - you hadn’t questioned that. But it didn’t negate the fact that it made you feel so small when he didn’t listen to your requests.

“I thought that was hilarious,” Bri said, arm reaching out for another shot glass. She had one already prepped in front of her, but preferred taking her shots two at a time. “But I get it. Vanda’s been worse since.”

“I can handle Vanda, I don’t really care about that. But it feels like our fights are usually because he just doesn’t listen to what I’m telling him. It’s like he thinks he knows better than me.”

Deep down, you know he didn’t mean it in this way, but it was like he didn’t trust you - your judgment, your read on the situation, whatever it is – and that hurt, especially when you had worked so hard to open up that piece of yourself to him.

“And I know that I’m not always right, and it’s not like I don’t want to hear his opinions, but I don’t like the choice being taken from me. Or worse, dangled in front of me like he’s going to consider my feelings, only to have him do whatever.”

Downing her two shots in rapid succession, Bri shook her head, reaching for her chaser before speaking. “I think that’s part of the problem, he thinks he is considering your feelings. He thinks he’s standing up for you and fighting for you. He thinks he’s taking some of that burden off your plate.”

“I don’t need, I mean, I don’t-”

“When is the last time you let anyone fight a battle for you?” Kat interrupted, elbows leaning on the table to make direct eye contact with you. “You tell everyone that you got it, that you can handle it. And we’ve seen you do it, so it’s not that we don’t believe you. But sometimes, we want to help you, for no other reason than we love you. And we can.”

The direct read into your defenses had your throat tightening, and you blinked back the tears that threatened to form and ruin your makeup.

“He should listen and take your feelings into consideration, absolutely,” Kat continued, voice gentle, “but also, you should let him support you and help more. I think if you let him be there for you in smaller ways, he wouldn’t feel the need to be the knight in shining armor so much.”

There was a lot of wisdom in your friend's words, and you had taken a moment of silence to chew on it, to let it sink in.

“He really loves you, you know that, right? So stop being a dumb bitch about it,” Bri deadpanned, but her expression was soft, “and let him love you. And you know I say that with affection.”

“I know,” you said, nodding at your friends. As much as it wasn’t easy to admit, they had a point, which also meant that maybe Changkyun did, as well. “Thank you both, seriously.”

It had only taken one text message, a quick “This tab isn’t going to pay itself” with a kissing emoji to have him showing up at the bar, settling into a table a few down from your own with a wink and a sly smirk, where he proceeded to wait out the evening, taking care of you and your friends as always when the time came.

“I’m still annoyed with you,” you had panted against his mouth when you got home, letting him push you up against the wall and cage you in with his arms. He was on you like a starved man, and it had made your buzz intensify, making you drunk on him, his kiss.

“Of course, I understand,” he mumbled, words barely intelligible in the urgency of his lips.

You had to fight to pull away, using one hand on the base of his throat to push him back for a moment to catch your breath.

“But, also, thank you. For what you did with Vanda. And for always wanting to protect me.”

If Changkyun noticed how soft your voice got, he didn’t say anything, instead leaning down to press his forehead against yours. You could tell he was going to say something – probably something devastatingly sweet – and you needed to finish what you were going to say, before the bravery lost you.

“I’m not used to having someone who wants to fight with me, or for me, you know.”

“I know,” he replied in a rush, like he had already known your confession, knew what you were going to say long before the words had formed. “I know, and I also shouldn’t be an ass and push all the time. But I will always protect you, yeah?”

Nodding, you fought back tears for the second time that evening, but this time you didn’t shy away from letting him see the emotion in your face.

“You’re mine, and I will always fight for you, sweetheart.”

This time when he kissed you, it was slow, purposeful, heated. Like he was going to make sure you felt and wanted for nothing other than him, his touch, and that you could allow yourself to fall into him forever and would always have a safe place to land.

Maybe it wasn’t so bad, to be vulnerable with someone, to let them in, if you could feel like this.

Or maybe it wasn’t so bad, only because it was Changkyun.

Tonight was the night, and everything was in place.

So why did Changkyun feel a ball of anxiety forming in the base of his gut?

Everything had been going according to the plan so far, not that there was much of a plan for any of this. It mostly relied on you and your friends being away from Yvonne’s for the night, which was easy enough since you were all off on the same evening. A rarity that you all were going to take advantage of, and had planned for movie night with drinks and sushi take out over at Kat’s place, an event that was common enough that Changkyun knew it usually ended in a sleepover.

He had dropped you off an hour prior, kissing you gently and shouting a greeting down the hall to the girls before heading back to the car, ignoring the feeling of guilt roiling in his stomach. He had just kept reminding himself that he was doing this for you, doing this so he could support you and give you the life that you deserved.

It was one last time, one last game.

But that pit didn’t dissipate as the evening went on, not even when he met with Joohoney who had insisted he take a shot when they arrived at Yvonne’s to help with his nerves. It had burned his esophagus, blurring the edges of his tension a bit, enough that he felt confident walking through the lounge next to his friend..

“You good?” Joohoney asked, slapping a hand on his shoulder.

Changkyun nodded. “Yeah, just really wanna win some money, you know?”

Joohoney had given him an understanding grin before guiding him past the tables in the lower section of Yvonne’s towards the stairs leading up to the high roller tables.

“It's our lucky night, Kyun,” Joohoney said, pausing in front of the door leading to where the game was about to begin. Through the heavily frosted glass, Changkyun could see several bodies already seated at the few VIP tables, and he felt his pulse spike. “We’re going to win.”

“I hope you’re right.”

The sleepover at Kat’s had been just the reset you needed.

A night of screaming at the television, drinking cocktails and eating your bodyweight in sushi with your friends was healing in more ways than one, and you had left the next morning feeling lighter and more content than you remembered in a while.

It was surprising to find your apartment dark and quiet when you returned, as you had assumed Changkyun would be there waiting for you, like he always was. You had given him a key long ago, figuring there was no point in pretending like he didn’t spend all of his free time glued to your side, but not fully ready to give up the independence of living alone quite yet.

Sending him a quick text, you let him know that you’re home and about to catch up on sleep before your shift later. He replies quickly that he had fallen asleep at his place after a late night with Joohoney, but that he would be there once you got off work.

Nothing had felt out of the ordinary, and you felt energized enough from your nap to get ready quickly, getting to work much earlier than you normally would for a shift.

You should’ve known something was up the minute you walked into work and saw that Vanda had a shit eating grin on her face.

She kept sneaking side glances, watching you with a scrutiny that made you uneasy. She’s normally more obvious in her attempts to annoy you, and her passive aggressiveness is setting your teeth on edge.

After the third glare and giggle on your way to drop off more drinks, you decide you’re going to confront her and ask her what her deal is, when she beats you to it.

“Did you have fun last night?” Vanda questions, a stupid smirk on her face.

“Why do you care?”

“Seemed like Changkyun did,” she continued, like you hadn’t asked a question. Your stomach dropped.

Raising a brow, you wait for her to go on, not wanting to give her any more satisfaction. She clearly knew something that you didn’t, and she was already well aware of that fact.

“How much did he actually end up winning last night? I mean, him and Joohoney were upstairs until last call, and he seemed pretty happy when he left.”

Instantly, your throat tightens, unease now unfurled into full blown anxiety. He was here last night? If he was here last night, and with Joohoney upstairs, no less…

“I didn’t manage to hear how much he won, just that Changkyun shouldn’t worry, because you would never find out.”

It was enough. You had heard enough.

It was surprising how quickly you switched into autopilot, spinning on your heel and striding out of the room before your throat tightens, before your vision fully blurs. Vanda says something more behind you, a lilt of concern in her voice, but you can’t hear her, not anymore.

Your mind quiets as your body takes control, moving you to find your manager to tell her that you need to leave, before grabbing your purse and coat, and leaving the lounge. Turning towards your apartment, your rage fuels your step, gut churning with the betrayal of knowing the only reason why Changkyun would be upstairs at Yvonne’s last night, why he would be leaving looking so pleased with himself.

The wind bit at your face, chapping your lips, but you didn’t care; needing the night air in your lungs and for the anger to be burned out in your movement before seeing him.

Because once you walked out your anger and faced the betrayal, you would need to deal with the deep seated fear for Changkyun’s safety, and how the hell you would be able to protect him now.

Changkyun wasn’t expecting you so early when you barged into the apartment, and the mix of confusion and excitement quickly bled away once he saw the look on your face.

He strides towards you, grabbing your shoulders, concern knitting his brow. “Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

Blinking, you allow yourself a moment to stare at him, to drink in his full mouth and stupid handsome face, before you swallow around the knot in your throat.

“Tell me it isn’t true, Changkyun.”

You hate how your voice sounds; weak and strained and like you’re just bone deep tired, defeated. Maybe you are.

“What are you talk-”

“Tell me that you weren’t upstairs at Yvonne’s last night,” you sigh, irritated with the ruse. “Tell me that you didn’t go and do the exact thing that you promised me you wouldn’t, and that I didn’t have to find out from fucking Vanda, of all people.”

Pulling away, you slide from his grasp, tucking your arms around your middle so that you wouldn’t be tempted to reach back out for him. It was tortuous, how much you want to reach for him, even when your heart is breaking.

“Sweetheart, I just- it was just going to be one last time, one last game. The pot was too good, it was enough to get you set up, so you could quit,” he lets the sentence hang, almost waiting for you to interrupt, but when you stay silent, he continues. “Joohoney made sure everything was good, and we won just enough to get what we needed, not enough to rock too many boats. I had it under control.”

Closing your eyes, you let the last sentence settle around your shoulders like a heavy weight, the same old feelings bubbling up. “It wasn’t about you being in control or not, Changkyun. It was about listening to me, actually listening to me. You promised.”

It was on the last word that you broke, that the tears started to fall, and for once you didn’t turn away, wanting him to see.

“You promised me you would stay away, and then you didn’t. You hid it. You thought you knew what was best for me, instead of just listening to me.”

Pain laces Changkyun’s face as he takes a step towards you, only pausing when you take an equal step backwards. “I’m so sorry, I don’t think I know better, I just-”

“Please leave. I’m done.” Your voice is low but measured, certain.

“Baby, please, let me just explain, and- and-”

“I don’t want to hear an explanation. I want you to leave.” Tears continue to fall, but you don’t drop his stare, willing him to understand just how serious this all is, how serious you are.

He wants to fight it, wants to say more, but something in your eyes must convince him, because he keeps his mouth shut. Instead, he moves back to the couch, grabbing his coat and phone, before making his way to the door. His gaze is mournful as he gives you one last look, lingering, before shutting the door behind him.

You aren’t sure how long you stand there, unmoving, before the autopilot kicks back into gear, forcing your limbs to move. Heading towards your room, you place your phone on the charger before you curl into your bed, surrounding yourself with the blankets and the lingering scent of Changkyun.

And then you let yourself break down.

Changkyun was drunk. Too drunk.

He shouldn’t have taken that last shot, especially not after that last drink from the bar. It was too much, but fuck it. Who cares?

“I’m not sure what I’m doing,” he mumbles to himself, not caring how crazy he looks. He wishes someone would just give him some direction, tell him what he would need to do in order to fix this.

He didn’t listen. He never listens.

And now he’s lost the only good thing he’s ever fucking had, the only reason he got up each morning and what’s the point, if you’re gone?

Fuck. Fuck.

Sliding down low in the booth, he lets his head hang, the whisky glass precariously dangling in his hand. His body felt so heavy, so numb, and yet the anguish deep in his chest only worsened, throbbed along to music blaring in the club.

If only he could apologize, he’d beg for mercy, he’d promise he’d never fuck up like this ever again. Explain how you were right - how he doesn’t need the money, or any of that shit, as long as he had you.

He needs you.

His heart is in a vice grip, squeezing so tightly that he thinks he might explode from his body, his skin, until he’s nothing but red.

Pain suddenly licks up Changkyun’s palm, and he looks down to see the glass cup gone. In its place are thousands of tiny shards, twinkling in the dim club lights, reflecting everything back to him. More red, but this time welling in his palm, pooling in the deep lines of the skin.

“What the fuck, are you alright dude?”

Changkyun thinks it’s Joohoney who asks him, or maybe it’s Hyungwon? It doesn’t matter either way, because it’s not you.

He goes to stand, to ask for a bandage or a rag or something, but instead his vision blurs, the room spinning. And then he’s flat on his back, blinking up at the cacophony of lights, faces coming in and out of focus, but not the one he needs, not the one he’s looking for.

He can faintly hear his friends talking to him, feel them digging in his pockets for his phone, but he can’t be present anymore. It’s too torturous, too heavy. Much easier to close his eyes, to think about your face. To let himself get lost forever.

He’s happy to die here on the floor of this stupid club, imagining your smile, your laugh, your lips as you say his name.

Changkyun just wants to take care of you, just wants to give you everything that you deserve. How can he do that if he’s here? If he can’t listen?

He lets the darkness swallow him.

Changkyun isn’t sure where he is.

He feels like he got hit by a truck, his head specifically feeling like it had been trampled on, though it’s his right palm that's aching in time to his pulse.

Without moving, he opens his eyes slowly, trying to take in his surroundings. It’s dark, wherever he is, and his head is propped on a pillow, body stretched out on a couch. He can see a small trash can directly in front of him, as if whomever brought him here wasn’t sure if he’d be capable of finding a bathroom if the contents of his stomach decided to make a reappearance, and he groans.

Fingers swipe through his hair, easing the pounding in his skull by a fraction.

“Hi, sleepyhead. How are you feeling?”

Changkyun thinks he has to still be sleeping, must be having a very good dream if it’s your voice he’s hearing, your scent he’s inhaling as he settles onto the pillow. He smiles to himself, not wanting to speak and having the dream fade too soon.

“Changkyun? Are you going to answer me?” This time, you peer over him, leaning down to stroke his face. You let your fingers linger briefly on his cheekbone before lightly touching his lips.

His eyes snap open.

“Is this real?” He asks, voice hoarse, gaze searching your own. He doesn’t feel strong enough to sit up quite yet, but you don’t seem to want to make him, either. “Are you really here?”

“Technically, you’re here at my place, but yes, it’s real.” You reply, your nails sliding back up to his hair to give his scalp a soothing scratch.

He swallows as he stares at you, as he drinks in the tenderness in your eyes that he thought he wouldn’t get a chance to see again. It took him a moment before he recognized your apartment in the dim light, and another more before realizing the pillow he’s laying on is settled in your lap.

Even knowing that this was real, that you truly let him back in, he was still too scared to speak, not wanting to scare you off. Not wanting the moment to end.

When he finally gathered enough courage, he cleared his throat.

“I’m so, so fucking sorry, sweetheart. You’re right. I don’t listen. I hear what you say, and then just act like an ass who thinks he knows everything.” Changkyun swallows thickly. “The only thing I do know is that you’re my everything. You’re all I need. Please, don’t give up on me yet.”

His pleas make your eyes well, and you force yourself to take an even inhale before speaking.

You want to tell him that you couldn’t give him up, that you had tried because you knew it would be easier in the long run, but your heart wouldn’t allow it. You want to say that you had regretted telling him to leave the moment the words left your lips, that you hadn’t meant them. You want to say that you were just so tired of not being heard, of people making decisions for you.

Instead, you roll your eyes playfully. “Now why would I do that, after all the trouble I went through to patch up your hand while you were black out?”

You will tell him those things, but later. When the sting of last night had faded a bit from both of your memories, and the impact intended can land.

He gives you a small grin, meeting your gaze. His hand - the bandaged one - raises slowly, tentatively, until it’s cupping your cheek.

“I just wanted to give you the world,” Changkyun murmurs, almost reverently. “I will give you the world, the right way. It might take me longer, but I will.”

His words soften you more, and you reach for his other hand, pulling him up until he’s facing you. He’s slow to move, the onset of a hangover taking hold, but eventually he settles sitting upright, eyes still intense on your own.

He is always trying to take care of you, trying to lessen your burdens. You know you’re not the best at accepting the help, but dammit, you were trying. For him. And he was trying for you, too.

You lean forward until your foreheads are touching, breaths mingling.

“I already have it, stupid.”

He kisses you then, a gentle press of lips that quickly builds, as everything always does with him. A push and a pull. Changkyun leans away slightly, grins against your mouth. “I’m an idiot, but you already knew that.”

“You’re my idiot. The rest is just noise.”

#changkyun x reader #changkyun smut #I.M. smut #I.M. x reader #IM x reader #monsta x smut #monsta x fanfic #monsta x x reader #ksmutclub #im changkyun #i.m monsta x #my writing #fic: god dammit i like it #fic: gdili

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freyatarotreadings8 · 6 months

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November 2023 | TAROT

Pick a picture 1 - 2 - 3

PILE 1

Hello, my loves! Here is a short prediction for you. It looks like November may bring a period of juggling responsibilities and making important decisions, while also dealing with some conflicts, have tension with folks around you. You may need to act quickly and decisively to address the conflicts or overcome challenges that arise. A clear and thoughtful mindset is essential for you during this period. Be prepared to act swiftly, but also consider the consequences of your actions. Hasty actions may lead to further conflict. Personal readings are available!

PILE 2

Hello, angels! Here is a short prediction for you. You may be focused on maintaining stability (studies, career, relationships). You may be holding onto something or someone just for your own security or out of fear. It isn't healthy, think about it. Anything that may be exerting too much control over you. Also you may be temped, feel addicted (or start a new addiction). Please take control over yourself, so you will avoid so many awful results (you are able to do it!). Let go of your negative patterns, they hold you back. By releasing any negative attachments or temptations, you can find emotional happiness and fulfillment. Personal readings are available!

PILE 3

Hello, my loves! Here is a short prediction for you. It seems that November may bring moments of self-reflection, contemplation, seeking balance and fairness. Any your issues will be resolved fairly. You may dive deep in thought, contemplating your emotions. You may be somewhat dissatisfied with your circumstances or people around you. You may be encouraged to balance your life. It's a time to harmonize your emotions, desires and actions. All of it will be essential for you during this month. Personal readings are available!

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catkyunie · 9 months

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Drink You Deeply ♡

ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ: The tension has been building for weeks between Changkyun and the boss of their little syndicate. Stolen glances, timed brushes in passing. Finally, the tension snaps.

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: mafia!changkyun x mafiaboss!reader

ɢᴇɴʀᴇ: smut, smut, and more smut

ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ(ꜱ): alluded criminal activity, oral (m! and f! receiving), fingering, pet names (angel/baby), thigh slaps, face fucking, pussy drunk changkyun (please let me know if I miss any!) MDNI 🛑

ᴡᴄ: 4.8k

The room was exactly how Changkyun had left it. Numerous items worth varying degrees of wealth littered the large mahogany table, anything from precious gems to pieces of deconstructed tech. Beneath that? An intricate and precise map of Seoul, down to alleyways and backstreets that average cartographers didn’t even bother with. Nevertheless, in I.M. 's line of work, he made it his business to know every twist, turn, and secret corner their capital might have hidden. Whatever caused the maneuverability of his brothers to be as effortless and smooth as possible. However, standing languidly before the whiteboard at the head of the table was the most priceless treasure in the room—the boss.

Her back was turned to him, eyes surely focused on the makeshift plans scribbled concisely over the face of the board, different colored notes representing the input and dictations of the members. The curtain of hair that Changkyun had imagined spilling over his body time and time again was tied loosely at the crown of her head, the planes of her slender neck peeking through with the subtle movements of her body as she studied. The thoughts of sinking his teeth into the pretty flesh, leaving his mark, and claiming, made I.M.’s throat bob as he swallowed past the thick taste of desire that bubbled up from his chest. She wore what looked like a pressed, white button down, rolled to the elbows and tucked into the waistband of a dark pencil skirt. Her arms were folded at her chest, her hip popped as she adjusted her weight from one foot to the other. Godammit.

Changkyun mimicked her demeanor, leaning casually against the far wall. Arms folded at his chest, accentuating his bare biceps, one foot lazily crossed over the other. He allowed his eyes to do one more quick sweep of her body above the table, thoughts of having her bent over its top darkening his gaze. Inhaling deeply and angling his chin, I.M. cleared his throat, pulling the young woman from her train of thought before asking simply, “We aren’t quite finished going over the logistics. Didn’t Shownu tell you as much?”

The boss turned on her heel to face Changkyun, her painted lips pulled up into a grin. He could have sworn he felt all of the air leave his lungs. Time and time again, I.M. found himself floored by her beauty, by the utter presence she demanded when she entered and occupied a room. Though she stood a full head shorter against the backdrop of him and his brothers, her gaze's calm, deep onyx commanded and brought rival syndicates to their knees. It was her voice and cunning that threatened violence and pain on those that fucked around in their territory. While every member had their role within the small group, they knew that she was the driving force that had propelled them to their standing in the rankings within the inner workings of the Seoul syndicates. And god damn, did it turn him on.

“Of course he did. But, when has that ever stopped me from peeking at plans?” Her voice was like silk, passing through his ears and massaging every bit of his brain that he never knew needed tickling. He replied with a quick, single-shouldered shrug, “It hasn’t. Just didn’t want you to think we were slacking off.”

Changkyun observed as her full lips slacked into a mock sulk as she bent forward at the waist and rested her palms on the deep red of the table. The exact shade of red that colored her lips and that he wished with every bone in his body to leave printed on her ass.

“Ever the perfectionist, Changkyunie.” she pouted.

He physically had to stop himself from whining at her teasing. From matching her sulk with a very real one of his own and explaining to her, as he had repeatedly, that if he wasn’t, everything could and would likely go to shit. While everyone held the same level of serious precision regarding their selected roles, I.M. felt that he was the orchestrated music that each of their instruments relied on to execute symphonies properly. He was their appraiser and getaway. The one that not only found the jobs and weighed their payout but that also ensured their safe passage to and from the heist. If he failed, they all did. Regardless, he refused to play into her razzing. So, instead, he settled with a furrow of the brow, his shoulders tightening as the muscle in his jaw twitched slightly.

Unfortunately, that was all she needed. Straightening from her position, arms crossing loosely beneath her breasts again, the boss clicked around the table. Stopping right in front of him and pressing a thumb to the crease in his brow, I.M had no choice but to relax beneath her touch as she spoke plainly, “You’ll wrinkle if you don’t learn to relax a bit, I.M. Didn’t Kihyun tell you as much?” Using his turn of phrase against him, she tilted her head in question, how her eyes softened despite the playful embers that glinted behind those black orbs. If her proximity to him hadn’t set his blood on fire, the care and sincerity behind her words certainly had. Without thinking, spurred forward on intuition and instinct alone, Changkyun’s hand went to her wrist, holding it tenderly as the thumb pressed to his brow now glided down the length of his nose and settled gently against his bottom lip. She tugged at it, making it fuller still, his grip on her wrist tightening slightly.

I.M. lifted his shoulders from the wall, straightening to his full height. He had half expected her to step away, to allow space between their bodies for breath to pass but, to his surprise, she stood firm. She did not budge as the swell of her breasts pressed lightly to the planes of his chest, her thumb now leaving his lip and resting lightly on his chin as she took it between her fingers and examined his face closely. There was no hiding or denying the lust that darkened his gaze, his eyes watching as she sucked her bottom lip between her teeth. Biting lightly and then licking at the swelling it induced.

“You’re playing a very dangerous game.” The words were palpable in his throat, thick and honeyed, sticking to the inside of his mouth. The back and forth with the boss had been going on for months. Subtle brushes of flesh, stolen glances, innuendos that both considered missed but were very much received and understood. This was the first time Changkyun allowed himself to act on his impulses. To take the thoughts that swam in his head and give them life, a voice. Judging by how she fixated on the curves of his mouth, her eyes hooded and mirroring the lust that stirred within his own, I.M. couldn’t help but wonder how long her inclinations had whispered to her.

“My favorite kind,” she said in response, her eyes finally meeting his. Inviting. Tempting. Challenging. Who would bend to their whims first? Break and fold under the gaze of the other? I.M.’s grip tightened further, his very bones feeling like they might snap under her continued contemplation. It was with his next inhale, a shudder that heated his blood and left his body quivering, that he knew. He was putty in her hands, to be molded, shaped, and used however she saw fit to please her cardinal needs. And she, being the perceptive leader she was, could see it, feel it, hear it in the way his very breathing seemed to bend to her. This was checkmate.

Just as quickly as the fire had begun licking at the base of his spine and tangling itself in his veins, he willingly and gratefully accepted defeat, it was plunged into freezing water and smothered. The step she took away from him, the hand that followed her and fell to her hip, stole the heat from his body and left a cold chill. The inches between them might as well have stretched for miles. Changkyun had to physically stop himself from moving in time with her, to plant his feet solidly to the ground instead of following her into that space, into that distance. Was this a coming to senses, a realization on her side that mixing business with pleasure would only lead to unneeded complications? Or, perhaps, this was another level to their unspoken game. Regardless, I.M. needed that heat like a drunk needed their booze. She was the finest whiskey brand, and he had every intention of succumbing to his basest desires and drink her deeply.

Changkyun’s hands met at his lower back, the palm that had previously held her wrist now wrapping around his own. Slowly, painfully so, he bent forward. Testing the space between them, watching to see how she responded. To no one’s surprise, she did not balk. Her face, her posture, gave nothing away. She stood firmly, one hand propped on a hip while the other hung loosely at her side. It wasn’t until I.M. had bowed to meet her at eye level, his mouth so close to her own, that their breaths mixed in a way that left his head spinning. At that moment was when he noticed the way her body responded. The sharp inhale, her bosom blossoming to steal his breath away and take it into herself. He grinned, despite himself, and on a whispered exhale, said against her lips, “Your move, boss.”

There, a silent switch was flipped in that too-quiet space between heartbeats. One that catapulted them into a direction that there would be no coming back from. Thumbs curled into belt loops as Changkyun felt a tug at his waist, positions of power shifting as the boss yanked him and spun him on his heel. With a flourish, I.M. found himself pushed up against the table's edge, his hips pressed tightly into the frame by the boss's insistent hands. The consistent ebb and flow of energy between the pair left Changkyun’s head spinning with a drunken stupor that he wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to recover from. Now he knew how delicious the conflict would be, based solely on the fragrant aroma of their shared lust occupying the same space. To think he was already this befuddled, and he hadn’t even tasted her yet–

His thoughts were quickly smothered down by the overwhelming sensation of her digits whispering against his flesh. I.M.’s eyes followed her every movement as she lowered to her knees, the friction of her slender fingers tugging at the tank tucked into the leather of his pants. It was enough to pull a whimper from the depths of Changkyun’s belly. The sound only spurred her further, bunching the clothing up near his middle before trailing those manicured nails over the raised muscles of his abdomen. He was utterly enthralled with the look of her, eyes blown out with desire, cheeks and ear tips kissed with the softest shade of pink. All while kneeling before him, admiring his body, on the verge of devouring him whole. Akin to a position of worship.

Before Changkyun could collect his thoughts and clear the fog of desire that had clouded his vision, he felt her fingers tugging at his hips, skillfully unbuttoning his trousers and pulling them from the cut of muscle at his pelvis. Slowly, languidly, those same fingers inched around his body to the seam of clothing that clung to his lower back, pushing past the fabric and down over the curve of his ass. And then, with one final tug, I.M popped free from the too-tight clothing. Now fully exposed, the head of his cock already swollen and weeping at the promise of what her hungry eyes entailed, he had to bite back a hiss as she leaned forward and drug her tongue over the slit, collecting the moisture there and savoring his taste.

Gone was the air of light-natured teasing. Now, there was a sense of urgency in how she pushed forward on her knees, how her tongue hung past her full lips as she slipped him into her mouth. The boss left him no room to breathe as she hilted him between her lips, nose brushing his public bone as he twitched at the back of her throat.

“Fuck–” he quipped, pushing up and into her throat, letting her feel his length, his girth, relaxing around him and adjusting her movements to accommodate him. As she worked her mouth over the shaft of his dick, taking his length and sheathing it between her lips, the boss’s eyes slowly and unconsciously slid closed. She was so engrossed in the feel of him filling her mouth, how his hips bucked to meet her throat, and the subtle taste of precum that coated her tongue and cheeks that she hadn’t even realized that her eyes had left his. She was chasing the high that came with knowing how Changkyun reacted to her touch and the feeling of her mouth milking him for everything he had to offer. However, unbeknownst to her, this was only half of the fun for I.M. He wanted her to witness how he came apart for her, to watch the subtle changes in him. He bit into the hem of his tank to keep his abdomen and hips exposed for her, one hand teasing at his puckered nipple as the other gently wrapped in her hair and tugged with encouragement. Her eyes on his body and experiencing firsthand how much of a whimpering, desperate mess he became, naturally submitting beneath her powerful gaze, did just as much for the man as being buried between those pretty lips.

“Please…” he begged through the cloth and gritted teeth, the fingers that had previously been tangled in her silk curtain now brushing gently against her jaw, pleading for her to place those beautiful eyes on him. And, just as he’d hoped, she entertained his request and did just that. From beneath those long lashes, her eyes found him. Watching the way they darkened upon seeing him in such a state, how he, quite literally, felt her cheeks tighten and suck at him harder, vacuuming him into the back of her throat, damn near sent Changkyun over the edge.

Feeling the way she adjusted beneath him, I.M’s eyes snapped down to the floor, her legs naturally spreading so she could place her center of gravity in her hips and thighs. When their eyes met again, he felt her hands trailing up the back of his thighs, nails dragging along the hardened muscle. The sensation pulled a groan from deep in his belly, eyes rolling to the back of his head as goosebumps littered his skin. Goddamn, this was better than he could’ve ever dreamed. He could feel the tight fist of climax grip his lower spine, but he had no plans to slow its impending arrival. She just felt too fucking good. That was when he felt it. Hands gripping at his firm ass, nails digging into the tender flesh and pulling him deeper into the depths of her throat.

“Oh, what the fuck…” he gasped, the hand in her hair tightening. Eyes locked on eyes once again, and as he held himself there at the back of her neck, waiting to see what she had planned, he felt her swallow against his dick with a slight nod of the chin.

“Can I fuck your face, angel? Is that what you want?” he breathed.

His answer came in the form of her pulling off of him slightly, centering herself, and once again pressing the tips of her fingers into his backside, urging him. That was all he needed. Readjusting his hand in her hair, his fingers grazing the nape of her neck and holding tightly, he nodded.

“Hold on tight, baby.”

Caution was thrown to the wind as Changkyun began to pump himself into her wet mouth, hips rolling forward and back steadily. With each thrust, the coil in his spine tightened further. Coupled with her nails in his skin and the look of absolute fucked out bliss on her face, I.M knew it wouldn’t be long before he emptied himself down her throat. She took each stroke like a professional as the force of his hips began to quicken. He was lost in his sea of need, the desperate and quickening pace he took evidence enough as he chased that high and the surge of dopamine that would come with it. He could feel his knees quake as lewd pants were pushed out of his throat. His eyes were clouded with an unspoken question that the boss answered with a slight tilt of her head, one of her hands snaking back to the front of his body as she palmed and kneaded his balls. That was what broke the dam.

I.M. had to brace himself against the edge of the table as his body arched and found release, fingers white knuckling against the wood surface and in the length of hair he had been gripping in euphoria. He felt the knot in his lower back tighten as he emptied into her mouth, her cheeks filling with his cum before she greedily swallowed it and savored every drop he gifted her. Quivering and breathless, he felt his body finally relax against the table as she pulled him from her mouth. The grin that tugged at the corners of her mouth had him hardening almost instantly. She was smug. And he wanted nothing more than to wipe that shit-eating grin off her face.

Bending at the waist with little warning, Changkyun’s lips found her in a hungry embrace, the hands at her waist quickly tugging her from the floor as they switched places. He didn’t have time to play this little back-and-forth they had established. Not now, not after he had found his climax and regained his head. Tasting himself on her tongue only elevated his need. He needed her, craved her. He was ravenous, and the slick heat between her thighs was the only thing to satiate his appetite. Gingerly placing her back against the mahogany table, a hand at the back of her neck to support how tightly he pressed his mouth to hers, Changkyun’s other hand was already working at her blouse. Deftly undoing the buttons straining against the rise of her chest, his teeth nipped at the bottom lip he sucked into his mouth as he quickly pulled away the brassier that held her breasts. Finally releasing the vice from her mouth, Changkyun straightened his spine as he peered down at his first in command and her state. He hadn’t even touched her yet, and she was already trembling. Her cheeks flushed, nipples perked, the skirt scarcely covering her lower half, riding up her legs and clinging to the plush flesh of her thighs.

“You’re perfect,” he breathed, his hands quivering as he reached for the seam of her skirt, pushing it up and around her waist. I.M’s hands now held her hips tightly as he bent before her covered slit, the boss’s legs unconsciously pulling away to give him the access he needed to admire. There was no hesitation in her movements, nothing showing that she was timid or uncertain. She knew what she wanted, and he always intended to give it to her.

“Kyun…”

Peeling his eyes from the moist cloth that covered her cunt, Changkyun met her gaze as she pushed up on her elbows and considered him. Licking at his lips, he turned his cheek into the hand she now offered him, pulling in a sharp inhale as the same hand quickly slid up and tangled in his dark locks.

“Be a good boy and tend to your mess,” she spoke lowly, eyes sharp and expecting.

That was all the encouragement he needed. Turning his attention back to her core, he pulled a hand away from her hip and quickly hooked a finger around the cloth of her panties, pulling them to the side and being welcomed by the most beautiful specimen he had ever seen. Every one of Changkyun’s senses was locked in. The world could have been burning down around them, and he wouldn’t have cared or bothered to notice. Seeing firsthand how swollen and plump the entrance of her body became from having him in her mouth, the feeling of her arousal coating and slicking his fingers as he traced his knuckles loosely over her entrance. Teasing. Enticing. The smell of her lust amalgamated with his saliva as he flattened his tongue over her slit, his nose pressed against the bundle of nerves at her apex. Hearing the sounds he elicited from her throat with every lick, lap, and stroke of his tongue and fingers set his blood on fire and drove him deeper into the folds of her cunt, as if smothering himself in her desire would bring him closer to God. And Christ Almighty, the taste of this woman. It was as if her flavor had been explicitly formulated to satisfy I.M.’s needs and desires. The richness of her, how she fully coated his tongue and throat and left him desperate for more. It was a brand she was unaware she had left on him, one that had tied their bodies together in ways that would send Changkyun to the ends of the Earth. To pleasure this woman, to kneel at the altar of her body and hear how she sang when met with his worship and devotion. He would give anything. He would give his life, his soul. He would give everything.

“Changkyun…” her voice was little more than a breath as he felt her fingers curl tighter in his hair, nails dragging over his scalp and causing him to groan into her cunt. His response had her back arching like a cat, her hips grinding into his nose and tongue as she gasped for air, desperate for friction and inching closer and closer to the edge of release. As desperately as I.M. wanted to tease and prolong their time together, pulling his face away from her sex left him trembling and fiending. His need to please her, to have her cum on his tongue and flood his mouth with her essence, smothering him between her thighs and completely encapsulating him in her own need, won out over his want to have her beg and plead for liberation. The line of desperation blurred between them, becoming a hazy daydream as they each crawled closer to their shared, common goal. Release.

The build-up was beginning to send tremors through the boss's body, her spine now permanently affixed in a seductive curve, her legs curling into her body as her thighs began to tremble. Changkyun knew she was close. He could feel how her hands tousled his hair, her hips rocked back and forth on his tongue, and her voice elevated from breathless pants to lewd sounds of pleasure and bliss that echoed in his mind. His hunger for her orgasm chased closely on its heels, driving him to bury his face deeper still as he lifted his shoulders and readjusted his angle. Both hands reached forward and tightly grasped her thighs, burying his fingers into the soft flesh and pushing her knees to her chest. Temptation pulled at his yearnings, and, answering the call that stirred deep in his belly, Changkyun pulled his face away from her cunt long enough to experience this new perspective. Lips that were slick and flushed a bright pink, that same gloss painting his mouth, nose, and chin, shimmering off her pale thighs. He pressed her legs together, causing the folds of her pussy to follow suit, and the view made him groan. Supple and juicy, the most delicious fruit he had ever had the pleasure of tasting. Lifting a hand and bringing it down with force against her thigh, Changkyun reveled in the bright pink stain that colored her skin. Bringing his hand back down against the abrasion, I.M. squeezed at the plush flesh, leaving indentations with his fingers. Gripping both thighs once more, he opened his mouth above the boss’s glistening cunt, allowing a dribble of spit to fall from his full lips and cover her entrance before diving head-first back into her folds and finishing his feast.

He pressed his tongue past her labia, the length of it finding and lapping hungrily at the bundle of nerves that made her thighs quiver beneath his palms. Bringing one of his hands down to chest level, Changkyun prepped one at her entrance, teasing at the opening before slipping past her wet folds. He felt her body jerking beneath him, her hips pushing down for the friction, her breath hitching as she choked out a beg.

“More…Kyunie, please.”

Slipping another finger into her, Changkyun drug his fingers upwards in a curl, feeling the pillow patch of flesh that sent her reeling. Massaging the tips of his fingers over it, his tongue steadily teasing and lapping over her clit, I.M continued the motion until he could feel her body tense and her breathing catch. Pressing his face into her, he propelled her over the edge, a cry passing through her lips that damn well almost made his twitching cock spill over the floor. It was hands down the sexiest thing he had ever heard, her pants of pleasure being a close second as the muscles of her cunt tightened around him, riding out her orgasm.

As the boss’s fingers loosed in his hair and he felt her coming down from the climax, Changkyun slowly removed his fingers from her core, planting one final kiss on her cunt before erecting his spine. Taking a step back, I.M admired her form as he sucked his fingers clean. Her body was still being rocked with aftershocks, her perfectly placed hair now sticking to her forehead as her head lolled lazily to the side. He bent forward, slowly wiping her bangs aside and kissing her forehead. As he went to stand, readjusting her clothing, he felt a hand at his wrist. She had rolled her head back, eyes finding his, pleading, as her legs began to spread again—a silent request.

“Greedy, aren’t we?” he teased, a lazy smile pulling at the corners of his lips as he stepped forward, stroking his firm cock as her legs easily rested against his hips. Just as he lined himself up with her pussy, he heard voices from up the hall.

“You knew I was going for that last bit of gimbap,” Hyungwon sulked, close at Minhyuk’s shoulder as his hyung shrugged and continued down the hall.

“You didn’t vocalize it, how was I supposed to know?”

“Min, stop teasing Hyungwon,” Shownu spoke over his shoulder, a grin playing at his full lips.

“You’re only saying that because if Minhyuk hadn’t gotten to it, you would’ve,” piped up Jooheon, throwing an arm over Shownu’s shoulder lazily as they rounded the corner into the conference room.

The four of them found Changkyun and the boss at either side of the room, one inspecting the board closely and scribbling notes as the other was seated at the table, thumbing through notes. An unmistakable tension hung in the air, one that was palpable enough to slice through. Kihyun, not far behind and clinging to plastic bags, elbowed his way through the group before shooting the men an incredulous look and setting the load on the table in front of the boss.

“Could you not crowd the doorway, please? Especially since you all left me to carry the takeout and drinks. Alone.” he stated pointedly.

“Thank you, Ki.” the boss said quickly, standing from her seat and going to trifle through the bag and remove the styrofoam containers. Peeking over her shoulder, she motioned to the dinner spread before stating simply, “Dinner’s here, Changkyun.”

As the men shuffled into the room and took their places at the table, I.M joined them and reached for the drink labeled with his name, nodding in thanks.

“Not hungry, Chankhyunah?” Jooheon asked simply, sipping from his drink and shooting a glance in the boss’s direction.

“Nah, I’ve had my fill for now,” he answered lowly, scribbling notes over a piece of looseleaf that sat to his right. With that being said, and one last glance shared amongst his brothers, an easy conversation began to filter through the room, consisting mainly of Hyungwon’s sulks and tandem teasing from Jooheon and Minhyuk. Beneath the table, he felt a hand on his knee, a firm squeeze from the boss. Grinning to himself, he took another sip of his tea and shook his head off the thoughts that began to cloud them again. The squeeze was a confirmation that she had heard his veiled promise. One that he planned to see through again, again, and again.

#monsta x smut #im changkyun x reader #I.M x reader #changkyun x reader #im changkyun smut #I.M smut #changkyun smut #monsta x x reader #Okay? Deal Series #catkyunie fic #paige writes

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lomlhwa · 1 year

Text

friends? lovers? (k.sw)

pairing: childhood bff!sunwoo x childhood bff!reader

preview: you lose contact with your best friend since birth. 5 years later, you're reunited. will your feelings for each other reignite at this sudden meeting?

tags/warnings: virgin fem reader, sprinkle of angst, lots and lots of praise, implied big dick!sunwoo, eye contact, lipstick stains everywhere, loss of reader's virginity, body worship, marking, hair pulling, hand holding, reader and sunwoo are IN LOVE, so many love confessions and "i love you"s, even more "i missed you"s, mutual pining, unprotected penetration (wrap it before you tap it), creampie

trigger warnings: n/a

wc: 2.5k

song recs for this fic: style by taylor swift, reveal by the boyz, god damn by i.m, libidO by onlyoneof

a/n: this was requested by @kswneoguri <3. i hope this is what you were asking for, thank you for requesting!!

from the moment the doctors handed you to your mother, she had decided that sunwoo would be your best friend for life. she was pretty desperate to make sure he was your soulmate.

honestly, you firmly believe that she manifested it into the world. you’ve been two peas in a pod since before you could walk. you would throw fits when you weren’t in the same class, couldn’t sit next to each other, or if you had to be apart for more than a day.

is that healthy? some professionals would say no. but it elated your mother. you managed to always avoid meltdowns because you would see sunwoo so often. having mothers who are also besties really helped the strength of your bond.

now, the real problems hit when your father decided to send you to an all-girls high school. this meant no more seeing sunwoo everyday. this meant you had a meltdown on the first day of grade 9.

sunwoo had been your only friend for your entire life. no one ever dared get between the two of you. and now, there’s an entire school system between you.

you walked into that school scared and alone. you sat by yourself in the back of all your classes. you scrolled on your phone, read books and just did your work as instructed.

now for the real icing on the cake, sunwoo moved cities away. 6 hours of distance and different school boards between you. you’d lost touch more than ever. honestly, you can’t even remember the last time you got to see him face-to-face.

you ended up going through the entirety of high school without seeing sunwoo once. after two years of being apart, he’d even stopped answering your phone calls. your mothers even stopped speaking to each other.

you had lost contact with your soulmate.

now, here you are, in the middle of university getting your degree. you’ve done nothing but work, work, work since you got to uni. what else are you supposed to do when your closest friend hasn’t connected with you in almost 5 years.

due to the fact that you’re the most antisocial person in existence, you’ve kept up good grades. great, even. you could very well make the honor roll.

your professors love you, other students pretty much ignore you, but other than that you’re pretty happy.

you do have one friend. one single friend. layla is the nicest person you’ve met in a long time. she’s no sunwoo, but she’s the closest you’ll probably ever get. she’s your best friend. the replacement pea in your pod.

tonight, she’s trying to convince you to go clubbing. something you rarely do. her reasoning? “y/n, you need to get out there and get yourself some play,” layla stomps around your room for the millionth time. you don’t really need to get laid. you’re perfectly fine as you are. a virgin.

“i don’t need ‘play’, i need to study,” you shake your laptop at your best friend. she walks over and takes your computer out of your hands. she tosses it onto your bed, making sure it lands carefully on the mattress.

“just tonight. lets go get hammered and hook up with a hot guy,” she nudges your head with her elbow. she knows you’re a virgin and wants you to get over your fear. she, of all people, knows how sex works.

you know you won’t win arguing against her. “fine, only tonight,” she squeals and grabs your hand. she’s going to make you look as slutty as possible. anything to get you laid.

she digs through your wardrobe and pulls out a silver, shiny, wrap shirt. accentuating your breasts and making them look supple. she pairs it with a tiny, tight, black skirt. your ass looks bigger and grabbable.

she plants you down on a chair and beats your face with makeup. you look almost runway ready. you’re definitely club ready, that’s for sure.

“oh my god, y/n. you look amazing,” she claps, patting herself on the back for her good work getting you dressed. “if you don’t leave with a hot guy, i will lose my mind.”

as soon as you enter the club, your ears are filled with bass boosted music. layla immediately drags you to the bar. she orders a set of shots and you down 3 like water.

she pushes you to the dance floor with mumbles of “i’m right behind you” and “i swear i won’t abandon you.” then, she abandons you for a hot guy already into her.

you hover around by yourself, swaying to the music. you get used to being surrounded by people but having no one pay any real attention to you. a few fleeting glances and a whistle or two. but no one is fully interested in you.

and then, you bump into someone. hard enough for you to almost topple over. but, you catch yourself.

you spin around to apologize but instead, you freeze in shock. the tall man you managed to knock into is the man you’d been longing for for half a decade. your breath gets caught in your throat and you almost feel like you might vomit.

“sunwoo,” you finally breathe. you swear you can see that his eyes are watering despite the dim lighting. the loud boom of the music has become nothing but a faint rumble in the back of your head.

“i can’t believe you’re here,” he wraps himself around you and takes in your scent. he basks in your long lost presence. he thinks that if he lets go of you, he’ll lose you again. but, he releases you from his arms to take in your appearance.

you definitely had not dressed for reuniting with your childhood soulmate. you were more dressed to unite with a guy who wanted nothing to do with you after the alcohol wore off.

“you wanna get out of here?” he asks and you nod. catching up with your old friend would be kind of difficult in a club. he takes you by the hand and walks out of the club. you take a deep breath of the cool midnight air.

“how’ve you been, y/n?” he finally asks. you shrug. “fine, i guess. just, doing a lot of school,” you explain. your life had been pretty uneventful. being friendless for a handful of years meant that you had no reason for an eventful life.

“oh. well, i’m pretty much the same,” he trails off, staring off into the sky. “did you miss me?”

did. you. miss. him? how could he ask you that? how could he not know the torment that your heart went through when he left? “of course i missed you,” you scoff. “i just about lost my mind when you stopped calling.” he shakes his head and sighs. he wants to have a good explanation as to why he stopped contacting you. but, he really didn’t have one.

“i’m sorry,” he mumbles. sorry doesn’t cut it for you. “sorry? you’re “sorry”?” you use air quotes to emphasize your sarcasm. he bites his bottom lip as it quivers.

“sorry doesn’t cut it for being abandoned by the person who was raised to be my best friend. sorry doesn’t make up for the 5 years i spent wondering what i did to push you away,” your eyes begin to water. he hurt you more than he would ever be able to understand.

he reaches out to hold your face in his hands. he rubs your cheek with the pad of his thumb, looking at you with sad eyes. “my precious y/n,” he presses his lips together in a thin line. your heart races and blood rushes to your cheeks.

“i stopped talking to you because i was so in love with you that the distance was starting to physically hurt me,” he sniffles and turns his head to wipe his nose on his shirt sleeve. tears finally spill out of his eyes. he missed you so much and now he’s professing his love to you.

“i loved you too. i still do. with every beat of my fragile heart, it calls for you,” you take your own hands and wrap them around his wrists. you look up at his with glassy, tear stained eyes and he loses it.

he presses his plump lips to yours and sighs. he’d wanted to do this since before he moved. and now here he is, kissing his childhood crush outside a nightclub. the wetness of fresh tears hit your face. he’s full on crying now.

“y/n, i’m so sorry i left you. please, let me make it up to you,” he presses his forehead to yours. you nod. “make it up to me, sunwoo.” he pulls his phone out and books an uber to pick you up and take you to his apartment.

as soon as the car pulls up to his building, he's dragging you inside and up the stairs. his hand never leaves yours. he fumbles with his keys to unlock his door, almost dropping them a few times.

he finally manages to open his front door, scurrying into his home. as soon as the door is locked and your shoes are settled at the front mat, his lips are on yours.

his hands travel to your back, his fingertips pressing under your shirt. he draws gentle circles along the bare strip of exposed skin. you break your kiss momentarily with a gasp.

"jump y/n," he mumbles against your mouth. you hop and he catches you in his muscular arms. wrapping your legs around his waist, you deepen the kiss.

he walks carefully down the dark hallway to his bedroom. you disconnect your lips and reconnect them to his neck. you leave bright red lipstick marks on his supple skin; a lustful piece of artwork.

he kicks his door open and drops you on his bed. he runs his hand through his hair and studies your disheveled figure. your shirt has begun to ride up on your torso, just past your navel. your skirt flipped up when he plopped you down on the mattress.

lord knows that if he hadn’t been in love with you before, he would be now.

he tugs his shirt over his head before pouncing on you, nipping and sucking on your bottom lip. when he pulls away to look into your hooded eyes, you really notice just how much of your lipstick covered his face.

he slides his hands under your shirt and you lift up at the waist to help him remove it fully. he sets it down on the floor next to his nightstand. his hands glide over your breasts, pressing them together, admiring your cleavage in his palms.

“s-sunwoo,” you whimper. he looks up at you and hums. “i’ve n-never done this before.” your words are barely above a whisper. your anxiety takes you over as soon as the sentence leaves your mouth.

his eyes immediately shift to worry. “do you want to do this?” his hands trail away from your chest, but you catch them and bring them back up. you trust him despite the years of distance and longing.

“yes. please, take me,” you grab his face and kiss him again. his hands make their way to your waist, gripping you tightly as if you might run away. you momentarily worry he’ll leave bruises; but you come to the conclusion that that would be okay.

your own hands travel to his jeans, fumbling with the button and zipper. he chuckles against your lips, finding your difficulty with his clothes to be endearing. he shoos your hands away and rakes charge, taking his pants off himself.

he looks into your eyes again for permission to remove your skirt and you nod. you lift your lower half off the bed for easy removal. “i love you so much,” he sighs, smiling like a maniac.

he kisses you up and down. the remainder of the lipstick on his face ends up on your own skin. kiss marks and love bites litter your exposed skin. he kisses up your arms, down your torso paying special attention to your stomach, and ends his kisses on the insides of your thighs.

as much as he’d like to taste you, or even do everything under the sun, he thinks he might explode if he can’t get inside of you soon. he presses your thighs apart before settling between them.

he hooks his fingers under the waistband of your underwear and tugs them down your legs. he pulls his own underwear off and hovers over you. he doesn’t give you a chance to see his size out of fear that you’ll chicken out.

“are you ready, my precious y/n?” his voice is soft and comforting. your nerves immediately relax. you nod your head, shuffling around trying to get some sort of friction. he groans lowly, his head hanging low.

"i've never been more ready for anything," your voice is breathy and on the verge of cracking. your eyes are half closed and you’re hazily grinding on him. you almost feel barely conscious but your senses are on overdrive.

he reaches down to align his rock hard cock with your entrance, biting into his lip to suppress a moan. he slides into you slowly, inch by inch, until he’s sheathed into you completely. he traps you between his arms, his hands on either side of your head. you reach up and slide your hands under his, intertwining your fingers tightly.

“i love you,” you whisper. your lip quivers as he begins to move, the stretch stinging just enough to bring tears to your eyes. “i love you so much, sunwoo,” you say again. you squeeze his hands, digging your fingernails into the tops of his hands.

“i love you too, y/n. i’ve missed you so much, fuck,” he leans down to kiss you harshly. your tongues clash in a spitty, slobbery fight for dominance. you lose inevitably and he sucks on the end of your tongue. his merciless pace inside you has you inching closer and closer to your release.

“i’m gonna cum, please, sunwoo. don’t stop,” you grip his hands tighter and arch your back just a little. this slight change in your position makes him reach just that little bit further into you. you snap almost instantly, clamping down on him.

your breath gets caught in your throat, your eyes roll back and your hands go slack in sunwoo’s. he few more thrusts and his hips are stuttering. “where do you want it?” he pants into your ear as you twitch under him. “i-inside, please sunwoo,” you gasp.

two more pathetic thrusts and he’s pumping into you. he stays bottomed out in you while he shoots 3 ropes of cum into you. he rubs his thumb on one of your hands, soothing you. he licks a bead of sweat off your forehead.

“i love you and i missed you,” you say for the millionth time. he smiles and kisses your cheek.

“i love you more.”

#lomlhwa #the boyz #tbz #sunwoo #kim sunwoo #the boyz smut #tbz smut #sunwoo smut #kim sunwoo smut

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