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[misslaurae4yc]

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[dignityfencingstudio-blog]

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[honourgym]

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[brainyparenting]

How to Help Your Child Develop Self Regulation Skills 💡 👨‍👧 🆘

I was a ski instructor during college, and 95% of the lessons that I taught were with children. Often, they were group lessons with up to a dozen children in my charge at one time. Even twenty years later I can still recall the ten-year-old girl that whined, cried, and threw tantrums all day long in my maxed out class of 12 children.

We had a bunny hill for learning, and she would screech in a whiny voice that her skis were not going the direction she was wanting them to go every time she skied down the small hit. That would be followed by her throwing herself in a mound of snow at the base of hill and wailing. It was an awful day as an instructor. I still wonder why her parents put her in the class if they knew she had this kind of behavior. My guess is that they wanted to ski by themselves and didn’t care if she learned to ski. It was simply the most available childcare at the resort.

I was a psychology undergrad student at that time, and I knew that her behavior was not normal. Looking back at the situation, she did not appear to be autistic as her social skills were quite adept. She is a perfect example of a child who lacks good self-regulation skills.

What Is Self-Regulation?

Self-regulation skills include a child’s ability to manage their emotions and behaviors in different situations. “It is related to emotional control and planning as well as the control of one’s own behavior.”[1]

If your child doesn’t win a board game, do they throw a tantrum or pout more than other children their age? Does your child become enraged or completely lose their cool when they can’t find something, such as their shoes or backpack, before school? Does your child habitually fight with their siblings or other children when they don’t get something they want, such as a toy?

If you answered yes to any of the above or feel that your child may be lacking in self-regulations skills, then keep reading. This article will provide you with tips on how to help your child with the development of self-regulation skills. It is imperative that children get help with these skills sooner than later, as research has shown that lack of self regulation early in life can lead to greater problems in the future, such as difficulties in school.[2]

Tips to Help Your Child Develop Self-Regulation Skills

1. Discuss Self-Regulation in Their Terms

“He made me do it!” my kids have said of one another many a times. They are usually defending their own bad behavior. An older sister may hit a younger brother because he spit on her, and her defense is that he made her hit him because he spit on her first.

This is the way a child’s mind works. It is up to parents to explain to their children that each person has control over their own actions and reactions. Children need to understand that self-regulation and control over their emotions and behaviors takes time and practice.

This conversation about self-regulation and self-control is not a one time occurrence. It is something parents should be discussing with their children regularly.

Talk to your child using terms that they understand. If you are working with your toddler on self-regulation, then you will need to convey things very simply. You can talk about how if they throw a tantrum in the grocery store, it means that they don’t get to go to the playground that afternoon. Remind the child of the consequence before you even enter the store. Talk about what good behavior looks like and that their reward will be playing in the park after shopping.

Teaching self-regulation skills should start early in life. Toddlers can begin to learn basic self-regulation through consequences. These consequences and the expectations for their behavior should be explained in basic terms that are age appropriate.

For example: “If you hit your baby brother today, you will get no TV tonight.” Follow through with consequences, but also set reasonable expectations.

Toddlers also need reminders often and to be talked to eye-to-eye on their level. Self-regulation skills are very difficult for toddlers, but it is teachable time.

2. Help Your Child Set Goals

Goals help to direct behavior. If your child sets a goal of getting an A in math, then their behavior can be directed toward that goal. Rather than playing video games after school, they may be more likely to get their math homework done if they have a genuine goal set for getting an A in math.

Behavior is regulated by goals, according to research,[3]. If an individual doesn’t have any set goals, then the behavior will likely have less regulation or direction towards a positive purpose.

Helping your child set reasonable goals that they can be passionate about can help their self-regulation. For example, if your child has a difficult time waking up each morning, then talk about setting a goal of them getting to bed by a specific time each night so they don’t have groggy mornings.

You can help them make a chart of this goal, so they can track their progress. After a few weeks of successfully achieving the goal, you can then discuss with them how their life has improved with more sleep and a set time of going to bed.

Only you know where your child needs improvements in self-regulation. Once you target the areas that need improvement, then help them to set goals that work toward better self-regulation skills.

Self-regulation is integral to life success through goal setting. In a research article that supports goal-setting and self-regulation, the following was stated:

Self-regulation also involves setting and reaching goals. To succeed in life, people must manage themselves effectively, which involves setting appropriate goals and then making themselves carry out the steps to achieve them. Often this involves persisting in the face of failures or setbacks. Self-regulation is crucial for enabling people to do this.[4]

3. Give Them Choices

A child who has good self-regulation will be able to see potential options in a situation, weigh each option, and make a determination of the best choice. Children who are always told what to do, how to do it, and when to do it may end up with poor self-regulation because they aren’t allowed the opportunity to practice making decisions.

Children should be allowed to make simple choices throughout the day from a young age. For example, ask a toddler if they want milk or juice at snack time. It really doesn’t matter to the parent which choice is made, since they are both healthy options for the child.

The point is to create opportunities that allow choices in various situations, so that the child can learn to make their own choices and understand how decisions lead to consequences.

The choices and options should increase with their age. For example, asking a five year old which shoes they want to wear to school. They can make the choice. If they end up selecting rain boots and they discover at school that they are difficult to run in at recess time, then they will have learned a lesson through their own decision making. The lesson should help them make a better choice the next time.

This kind of choice-making opportunity helps a child to learn about planning and thinking ahead. Planning is an integral part of self-regulation.

4. Give Them Planning Opportunities

Planning helps a child to self regulate their behavior. “It [self regulation] is related to emotional control and planning as well as the control of one’s own behavior.”[5]

Planning how to react in a tough situation can help a child with self-regulation. If your child has a tendency toward lack of self-regulation in specific situations, then help them to plan ahead.

For example, if your child throws a tantrum when their little league baseball team loses a game, then help them plan ahead. Discuss how they will act if they win and how they will react if they lose. You can talk to them about how they have a choice to make about their behavior in that moment.

Help them to plan ahead for the decisions that they must make in tough situations. When they make bad choices or plan poorly, it is also an opportunity for you to discuss how they could do things differently next time.

5. Play!

Play helps children to develop self-regulation skills. One such way, as proven in research, is “children learn to inhibit their impulsive behavior and follow rules which transform their behavior from impulsive and spontaneous to mediated and voluntary.”[6].

For example, when children are playing a game with their peers, they learn to follow the rules. They will find out quickly that if they don’t follow the rules or if they cheat, their peers will react. They may be kicked out of the game or they may be scolded by their peers. Play gives them the opportunity to practice self-regulation in real life scenarios that children can understand.

6. Model Good Self-Regulation Skills

A child watches their parents and caregivers. They will watch to see what kind of behavior is modeled. That is part of human development. Children watch, learn, and imitate those around them.

Therefore, parents and caregivers must be aware of their own self0regulation skills.

How do you react when things don’t go your way in life? Do you raise your voice and curse? Are you impulsive, or do you take a moment to pause and make the best decision possible in every situation? Do you plan ahead and make good choices?

Children learn from us. We must make an effort to practice good self-regulation skills, so that our children can learn positive self regulation from us.

Final Thoughts

Circling back to the story at the start of this article, I want to address the situation with the girl who had no self-regulation skills apparent that particular day. Perhaps if her parents had helped her to set a goal of learning to ski that day and discussed how she should behave in class so she could maximize the learning opportunity, she may have acted better.

However, in her case, her behaviors were so far from normal self-regulation that she probably would have required professional intervention (counseling or behavior modification therapy) to behave in a normal manner in a group ski lesson.

If you have ever seen a ten-year-old child who acts like a two year old, then you too have seen how important the development of self-regulation skills are in life. The older the child gets, the more difficult it is to change set behaviors.

Help your child learn good self regulation starting as a toddler, and continue teaching them as they learn and grow.

More on Positive Behaviors in Children

5 Tips For Teaching Money Management To ChildrenHow To Make Your Kids Responsible And Productive7 Positive Parenting Techniques to Raise Happy Kids

Featured photo credit: MI PHAM via unsplash.com

Reference

[1]American Psychological Association: Temperament, Attention, and the Development of Self-Regulation.[2]Developmental Psychopathology: Biological processes in prevention and intervention: The promotion of self-regulation as a means of preventing school failure[3]ResearchGate: Self Regulation Through Goal Setting[4]Improving Competence across the Lifespan: Self-Regulation as a Key to Success in Life[5]American Psychological Association: Temperament, Attention, and the Development of Self-Regulation.[6]Early Childhood Development and Care: Does play promote self-regulation in children? function footnote_expand_reference_container() { jQuery("#footnote_references_container").show(); jQuery("#footnote_reference_container_collapse_button").text("-"); } function footnote_collapse_reference_container() { jQuery("#footnote_references_container").hide(); jQuery("#footnote_reference_container_collapse_button").text("+"); } function footnote_expand_collapse_reference_container() { if (jQuery("#footnote_references_container").is(":hidden")) { footnote_expand_reference_container(); } else { footnote_collapse_reference_container(); } } function footnote_moveToAnchor(p_str_TargetID) { footnote_expand_reference_container(); var l_obj_Target = jQuery("#" + p_str_TargetID); if(l_obj_Target.length) { jQuery('html, body').animate({ scrollTop: l_obj_Target.offset().top - window.innerHeight/2 }, 1000); } }

The post How to Help Your Child Develop Self Regulation Skills appeared first on Lifehack.

By: Dr. Magdalena Battles Title: How to Help Your Child Develop Self Regulation Skills Sourced From: www.lifehack.org/895438/self-regulation-skills Published Date: Fri, 22 Jan 2021 15:01:04 +0000

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[marcusdjamison]

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[zoneblogging]

Types of Dog Training Programs

Types of Dog Training Programs: The Best (and Worst)

Young Labrador retriever dog in run These days, you have a heap alternatives for training your canine accessible to you. Indeed, the trouble is all the more regularly choosing which approach will be the best in training your specific canine (and the technique that will work the best with your specific circumstance). Since you've concluded that you're going to invest the energy into training your canine and that the exertion merits the outcomes you realize you'll get, the time has come to choose what sort of training program you will utilize.

If you are looking for the best dogs training plan, this is the best option: Click in the image below

Types of Dog Training:

Private Training This kind of training includes paying an hourly rate for one-on-one with an expert pooch mentor at a type of training office (or maybe in your home at a greater expense rate). This can be an amazingly successful technique for training your canine. Since you are there with your canine, you are indicated precisely what developments and moves to make and your pooch profits by an expert hand. Be that as it may, this training is effectively the most costly, on the grounds that proficient mentors frequently charge 20, 40, or even as much as 100 dollars an hour for their ability. Moreover, on the off chance that you don't discover a coach who is sufficiently learned to manage the entirety of your pooch's inclinations or in the event that you just don't "click" with your mentor, your time and cash can without much of a stretch descend the channel with next to no detectable outcomes. Likewise, working widely with another mentor can possibly befuddle your canine regarding who he/she ought to really react to. At the point when this occurs, some of the time hounds who act very well around the expert coach act ineffectively at home when you are in control. Group Lessons Gathering hound training meetings are the point at which different pooch proprietors and their canines work with an educator, generally an expert or semi-proficient pooch mentor, for a specific number of class periods. These exercises can likewise be called facilities or compliance classes. Gathering exercises are more reasonable than private exercises and can likewise help mingle your canine since you're around numerous different creatures and proprietors for broadened timeframes. In any case, the expense is as yet higher than other training strategies and you don't get almost the measure of consideration and help from the coach running the course than you would in a private exercise setting. Also, in many cases the teachers for bunch exercises might be less experienced or qualified than if you somehow managed to search out an expert to give you private training. Books and Training Dogs Guides There are a large number of pooch training books, sound courses, magazines, and sites accessible to you. Clearly, purchasing a $15 hound training book is considerably more cost-proficient than paying maybe several hundred dollars to go to training exercises. Be that as it may, training your canine with a book is troublesome on the grounds that you have nobody to assist you with seeing ineffectively clarified standards. You likewise have nobody to show activities and developments to you. Since hound training includes many time-touchy developments and activities, just as slight developments and places that can without much of a stretch be inappropriately actualized, it is basic in your pooch training that you can see those activities exhibited for you. Furthermore, training your canine utilizing a book or composed guide gives almost no responsibility and inspiration for most pooch coaches. Considerably more frequently than not, hound proprietors quit standard training meetings with their pooch before they complete the book or guide. Video Dogs Training Video hound training might be the best option in contrast to costly private exercises. Video exercises are significantly more moderate than recruiting an expert mentor, reachable at a fifth, 6th, or even a tenth of the expense. On the off chance that you register for an online video hound training course, you will have the responsibility of finishing benchmarks or modules on schedule. Recordings will help show precisely what you have to do with your pooch to prepare him/her adequately. Besides, you are doing the training without anyone else. This encourages you to construct a bond with your canine and doesn't confound your pooch regarding who is really manager between you or a mentor you employ.

Conclusion

After broad looking, I have discovered that one pooch training seminar on the web gives strong, quality recordings and training more than some other course I investigated. Brain Training for Dogs is a finished pooch training course that will assist you with building a strong submission establishment with your canine or little dog and change your pooch into a responsive, devoted canine instead of a resolved, inert aggravation. In the event that you have concluded that a video training course is directly for your necessities and your financial plan, click the connection underneath in my mark and begin changing your pooch. Click the below Image to know more:

Article Source: here Read the full article

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[dignityfencingstudio-blog]

Group Lessons

If you thrive more in a group setting, Dignity Fencing Studio also offers group lessons so that you can learn fencing with other students of your age and/or skill level. Group classes are only taught in the saber style but can still be structured to help you achieve your goals, recreational, competitive, or otherwise. To book your spot for your free trial lesson with other aspiring fencers, please contact us at Dignity Fencing Studio today!

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