#had to get up and walk away for a minute

[caeslxys]

I’ve mentioned this elsewhere but it feels relevant again in light of the most recent episode. Something that’s really fascinating to me about Orym’s grief in comparison to the rest of the hells’ grief is that his is the youngest/most fresh and because of that tends to be the most volatile when it is triggered (aside from FCG, who was two and obviously The Most volatile when triggered.)

As in: prior to the attack on Zephrah, Orym was leading a normal, happy, casual life! with family who loved him and still do! Grief was something that was inflicted upon him via Ludinus’ machinations, whereas with characters like Imogen or Ashton, grief has been the background tapestry of their entire lives. And I think that shows in how the rest of them are largely able to, if not see past completely (Imogen/Laudna/Chetney) then at least temper/direct their vitriol or grief (Ashton/Fearne/Chetney again) to where it is most effective. (There is a glaring reason, for example, that Imogen scolded Orym for the way he reacted to Liliana and not Ashton. Because Ashton’s anger was directed in a way that was ultimately protective of Imogen—most effective—and Orym’s was founded solely in his personal grief.)

He wants Imogen to have her mom and he wants Lilliana to be salvageable for Imogen because he loves Imogen. But his love for the people in his present actively and consistently tend to conflict with the love he has for the people in his past. They are in a constant battle and Orym—he cannot fathom losing either of them.

(Or, to that point, recognize that allowing empathy to take root in him for the enemy isn't losing one of them.)

It is deeply poignant, then, that Orym’s grief is symbolized by both a sword and shield. It is something he wields as a blade when he feels his philosophy being threatened by certain conversational threads (as he believes it is one of the only things he has left of Will and Derrig, and is therefore desperately clinging onto with both bloody hands even if it makes him, occasionally, a hypocrite), but also something he can use in defense of the people he presently loves—if that provocative, blade-grief side of him does not push them—or himself—away first.

(it won’t—he is as loved by the hells as he loves them. he just needs to—as laudna so beautifully said—say and hear it more often.)

[br1ghtestlight]

i always crave chocolate and candy but never enough to actually walk to the corner store and buy some for myself...... hardest life of anybody who has ever lived btw

[szappan]

also today me and an exchange student i became tentative but earnest friends with over the semester realised we're probably never going to see each other again it's all so strange how quickly you can start missing people

[xluxsolarisx]

i get the impression you're probably really pretty then huh :3

i'm so normal about this. i'm giggling blushing twirling my hair kicking my feet like a schoolgirl even but i'm doing it in a normal way that normal people do. what makes you say that? how did you know? wanna come off anon and let me show you how goddamn pretty i can be? i have so many questions but i'm smiling so sweetly and too distracted to ask them

[neonphoenix]

Thinking about how my high school was consistently one of the top three schools in the state the entire time I was attending it and yet we still had plaster regularly falling from the ceiling.

[anotherpapercut]

when I was in 8th grade I had the same teacher for physics and geometry and he was like one of those dudes who always wanted to be one of the cool kids but never was so now he got to be the cool teacher that all the cool kids loved so he would like straight up bully the weird kids (me and my friends lol ✌️) and I thought it was wack as hell that a grown ass man was calling my friend, a 13 year old girl, stupid in front of the whole class for asking a fucking question so I constantly told him to back off and would get in full on screaming matches with the man about why he was not allowed to treat us like that (at one point I basically told him that if he ever made my friend cry again I would not rest until his teaching license was revoked lol) and it got to the point where he was like. actually for real beefing with me during class and in the hallways when he saw me and sometimes after school

anyway I just wanna say first of all fuck you Mr. Glasson, second of all what kind of like 28 y/o man has a fr beef with a fucking 13 year old. I literally wore a cloak to school. he was having beef with a child with pink hair, in a cloak. can you fucking imagine jsbdksbdndmdbnd

[zipzapzopzoop]

omg I'm an idiot. I had a setting that prevented my posts from being found in search. hang on let me test this out.

[skylarkblue]

hi it's me i'm back and complaining about youtube ads again

i just. i just think it should be, like, against the rules for alcohol companies to advertise on youtube. because like

kids use this site, they don't need to see that shit and have it normalised

some of us. have had issues with alcohol in the past. maybe grew up in homes with alcoholics. maybe used to drink until we were sick. so many scenarios! i am just saying, alcohol does not need to be advertised on youtube.

anyway that's my killjoy post of the day

[screamingay]

does anyone else think it's bullshit that i keep getting scheduled for 8 hour 11-7 shifts instead of my usual 7 hour 7-2 and i don't even get paid for the full extra hour because the evening shift workers ALWAYS leave like a half hour early?? im never allowed to leave early on 7-2s in fact i usually end up leaving kinda late bc they're always saying we have to finish everything before we leave. but the evening shift never finishes everything before they leave!! every time i come in for a 7-2 i find so much shit unfinished bc the fucking 4 or 5 hour 2/3-7 shift people don't even bother staying until 7 to finish up and apparently management is fine with this?? and whenever i'm there until 7 they pressure everyone to close up by 6:30 so they can go home sooner but i dont fucking care abt that! they automatically take a half hour unpaid lunch out of my timesheet anyway so that plus the leaving early means i don't even get paid much more than i would on my usual shift. and the 11-7 is the worst shift too they keep putting more responsibilities on that one person which somehow also makes it harder for everyone else bc the 11-7 cant help as much. cant fucking wait to hit my one year there so i can finally job hunt again and hopefully find a place that at least gives me time to sit down and eat lunch while im not getting paid. smh

[mccleans]

[tsvai]

goodreads is really a hellhole, huh?

[whentherewerebicycles]

ran 33:30 without stopping :) my map app says it was only 2.75 miles but my missed-IUI-cycle goal was 3 miles or 30 min without stopping by 3/20 so I’m gonna count that as achieving my goal!!!!

[harrowharkwife]

man seeing all the responses to this episode from people who Didn't grow up with narcissist emotionally neglectful parent(s) is Wild. like what do you mean you found this episode confusing/out of character/not the most empowering and cathartic thing you've ever seen on TV. this was the most realistic and relatable thing ive ever seen in my life. fucking loved it. absolute gut punch. i feel like a wrung out dirty dish towel. gonna go do backflips off the empire state

[atlafan]

I’ve seen my dad almost every day since I’ve moved back closer to home and I have to see him tomorrow for Father’s Day, and I don’t think any of my other siblings are coming to visit because my oldest sister is probably working/just wouldn’t come in general, my brother is probably doing his own thing with his own unit, and I didn’t even ask my other sister what she’s doing because she just had her baby WHO I STILL HAVENT BEEN INVITED OVER TO MEET so basically I’m back where I was seven years ago being the only one forced to spend copious amounts of time with my father ALONE because I’m not in a relationship where I can use distance/doing things with my partners father for Father’s Day. And my dad always jokes about being father of the year, even though none of us have ever said he is or was, he just self proclaims it. And he’s so fucking conceited like he truly cannot understand why literally every single one of us moved out and got away from him the second we could. So basically, just as I knew, being back closer to this man is detrimental for my mental well being. I will be blowing my brains out tomorrow BYEEEEE

[saintedbythestorm]

Not dad trying to tell me about some big fallout news he heard about from some work colleague 😂 oh what the poor man just subjected himself too.

[beholdthemem]

The universe saw fit to gift my grandmother with a lovely case of covid for Christmas because of course it fucking did, so the past few days have been, uh...

Busy.