#hate men but why is it that im attracted to them

[bi-writes]

if you can’t tell by my recent works lately, i hate men at the moment 😃

[neonbuck]

maybe it will clear out more toxic people if i come out as a bi lesbian on here and also considerably less transmasc than i used to identify as

[mariemariemaria]

i really dont know whats driving all the pro-corset nonsense but its so annoying. girls were put into corsets from young ages, sometimes before they even reached puberty. mothers were often the ones forcing their daughters to wear corsets even though they didn't want to and rebelled against it. honestly i think being critical of corsets is important when discussing today's insane beauty and weight standards for women. 'tiny waist' crazes came in and out of fashion and waist goals could be as small as 16 inches, which is insane and there's no way you're gonna convince me that that's healthy or normal or feminist. how is that any different to women having weight or thinness goals that prioritise their beauty over their health? how is the fluctuating fashion for different waist sizes any different to how different women's body shapes go in and out of fashion these days? body shapes which are so extreme that they are impossible to achieve without either starving yourself ('herorin chic') or getting surgery (bbls). i think we do a disservice to ourselves if we ignore the similarities and dont learn from history tbqh

[wolverinedoctorwho]

How many things am I gonna try thinking "oh this will finally reveal to me whether I'm trans" before one of them actually *works*. I'm tired of this grandpa.

[epicdogymoment]

once again rubbed the wrong way by friends who unintentionally reveal that they dont really engage with my masculinity in any real way and see me as nonbinary (female-lite)

[invisiblyvisiblejay]

bisexual essay almost done 👍

[zhuhongs]

i need more dramas abt lesbians just living life and having normal jobs....

[enmites]

Billy and I were walking down the hall and as we got to the door I said, "Do you want to come in?" I was just enjoying the conversation we were having. We were finally getting to know each other. But when I said it, Billy looked down at the floor and said, "I don't think that's such a good idea." When I shut the door behind me, alone in my room, I felt so stupid. It was so obvious that he thought I was hitting on him and that made me so sad.

[bestlilithian]

The lilithian experience (lilith dominant chart)

Personal experiences w having heavy lilith influence

- Older people being creepy subtly or overtly, but usually subtly with certain looks or touches or comments, especially strangers in public or distant family friends

- Being told Im scary or intimidating, or that I look mean (a girl once told me she thought I wouldnt want to hang out w her and her friends because I looked 'too pretty and kinda mean') [this is esp w lilith/asc harsh aspects]

- Lilith square asc culture is walking into a room a little pissed or in a hurry and everyone shutting up (also works for mars/pluto)

- Now Ive never heard anyone else talking about this but as a lilithian woman Ive always been disgusted by the idea of having sex with a man because in our culture a woman who has sex w a man is seen as having been dominated and degraded by him ("I fucked her" "I hit that" "I scored") also the act itself is very power struggle-ish like no *I* want to bend over a man and make him suck *my* dick

- Ive also noticed a lot of lilithian women are lesbians (including me <3) , might deal w lots of comphet tho

- Being hyperaware of people looking at you (even if youre dressed extremely modestly or without makeup)

- Lilith/moon aspects 🤝 your mom making inappropriate comments about you and your body

- Lilith/sun aspects 🤝 your father insulting you or making weird comments (more subtle w soft aspects so you might brush it off but its still not okay girl)

- People thinking youre flirting with them or others (esp men) but youre just hot and talking, and you cant help that ppl have strong reactions to anything you say really

- Loving eye contact <3 (w the right people)

- Lilith square saturn culture is not being afraid to stand up to authority <3 and having to quite often because they have a pick on you and try to tear you down

- also w lilith square/opposite saturn grown ass adults will have beef w you when youre a kid, esp those w authority over you like teachers, coaches etc

- Lilith/asc harsh aspects and overthinking whether a fit is too revealing or not (because you dont want to get harassed and looked at again) (but then youll grt harassed even if you go out in a priests suit so 🤩)

- People (esp men) trying to use you for sex

- Always being the one guys want to be friends w benefits with while theyre crushing on another girl

- "I dont like what you do to me" - most men Ive interacted with for a while

- A guy told me he liked me for who I am but he couldnt stand "the effect I have on him"

- lilith in 4th house culture is attracting men w mommy issues and being looked at by guys in relationships

- lilith/mercury and needing to know all your friends bdsm test results

- People liking when youre mean 2 them

- People who hate you often want to have sex w you

- Ive had so many guys in my class literally have to gather up courage to talk 2 me, even for basic things like asking me to help w something, they approach me looking all tense and worked up like Ill slice their head off for asking me to help them with their math lmao

- A classmate (and friend, apparently) of my friend once didnt want to come out and meet me when I went to my friends school to give her something because she thought Id beat her up (for context I found out she said some nasty things to my friend and was not happy about it)

- Being told by ppl (esp men) that I remind them of characters who are villains

- People esp girls not liking me for no reason or being rude

- Guys in relationships being extremely cold and rude to me or even shittalking me to their gfs (you can guess why)

- People trying to 'put you in your place'

- Recognizing other lilithians immediately

- Being insecure about your private parts, your body in general and your appearance

- Sex obsession since a young age

- Sexual harassment unfortunately

[transmascissues]

it's silly but the biggest reason why im not into t yet is bc im so afraid of losing my hair. do you have any solutions/tips for it?

first of all, i don’t think it’s silly — it’s natural to be worried when hair loss is talked about by so many people as like…one of the worst results of aging for men. listening to my dad talk about how much he hates balding definitely did not make me feel particularly good about the knowledge that i may very well be joining him someday. i’m not saying the fear is right, because i don’t think hair loss is something awful that we should avoid at all costs, but it’s an understandable fear given the beauty standards we’re working with, and it’s one that a lot of us (myself included) feel.

one thing that’s helped me is just…paying more attention to the guys that i interact with on a daily basis. i’ve learned two things from it: 1) hair loss is super fucking common. i’d say it’s much harder to find an adult man who isn’t balding at all than it is to find one who’s completely bald. and 2) if you forget everything you’ve been told about how bad hair loss is, you’ll realize that quite frankly, every single one of those guys looks totally fucking fine. it doesn’t ruin their appearance and make them ugly, it looks totally natural and isn’t really even something you’d notice if you weren’t looking for it. we put so much weight on it but it’s really just not that big of a deal. i’ll hear my parents talk shit about men in my family who are losing their hair when i didn’t even notice a difference last time i saw them. it’s one of those things (like so many other appearance-related things) that you really only notice at all because you’ve been taught that you’re supposed to care about it.

this isn’t something i’ve done personally, but if you really want to desensitize yourself to the idea of it, embrace the time-honored queer tradition of just shaving your whole damn head! find out what you’d look like without hair, find out how you feel about it and what you can do that makes you feel good about your appearance without hair, test the waters while it’s still a temporary change and not something permanent. that way, it won’t feel like this big scary unknown, and you’ll actually have a frame of reference for your feelings about how you look without hair rather than accepting the societal assumption that you’ll inevitably hate it. if you don’t want to actually shave your head, you could also just fuck around with bald filters or photoshop and see what happens.

oh, and if you’re attracted to men, keep an eye out for guys who are bald or balding and also hot as fuck. in my experience, there’s no insecurity or potential future insecurity that being gay for other men hasn’t helped me with. just off the top of my head, i can think of a couple actors who i think are absolutely fucking gorgeous who have helped me get over my fears about losing my hair. despite what our anti-aging-obsessed world might want you to think, there is no such thing as a physical feature that automatically makes someone less attractive, and while making attractiveness less of a priority in your life is good, it can’t hurt to also give yourself some proof that actually, you might lose your hair and look hot as hell doing it.

basically, entertain the possibility that it won’t be a bad thing at all! whether that’s just because it turns out to be a neutral thing for you or because you end up actually liking it, it’s not an inherently bad thing. i’ve ended up liking a lot of things that were “supposed to” be bad effects of t — i love the weight i’ve gained and the new shape it gives my body, i get a lot of gender euphoria from the fact that my acne is now on parts of my face that i saw a lot of guys in high school get it and i’m not complaining about the scars i get from it either because i’ve always liked the added texture that acne scars give my skin, and so on. i think there’s a lot of joy to be had in the changes we’re taught to fear, once we look past that conditioning and actually explore how we feel about it.

but if it’s something you really don’t want and you just want to improve your chances of not having to deal with it, it’s not like there’s nothing you can do! products like finasteride (oral) and minoxidil (usually topical but i think there might also be oral versions) are pretty commonly used among trans guys, for the purpose of avoiding hair loss and for other reasons, and there are plenty of other anti-hair loss products out there (though i don’t know how effective any one of them might be). if it’s a big enough deal for you, you can just decide that you’ll go off of t if/when you start noticing signs of it, since no longer having higher t levels would stop the process in its tracks. and if you don’t find prevention options that work for you so it ends up happening, you can always explore different hair styles (judging by the pattern of hair loss i see in my family, i suspect that keeping my hair long would make it less obvious if i started losing mine), find your preferred method of covering it when you don’t feel good about it (personally i love a good beanie generally and would probably wear them a lot more if i didn’t have hair to worry about because my main complaint is the way they press my hair onto my neck), or just shave it all off if you don’t like the look of the partial balding but don’t mind a shaved head. the point being — you have options!

at the end of the day, whether you go on t or not, you’re going to see your body change as you age in ways that aren’t always going to be attractive to others or aesthetically pleasing to you. that’s just the reality of having a body. even if you never went on t, you’d get older and you might see your hair thin out even if you don’t bald, you’ll see your skin start to wrinkle and sag in places that used to be smooth, your metabolism might slow or your body fat might start to gather in new places; hell, you might lose your hair for a totally different reason and end up in the same place but without the benefits of having been on t that whole time. life is full of bodily changes like that. transphobes will fearmonger about the permanent changes of testosterone all day long but the truth is, there is no escaping permanent bodily changes. whether or not you go on t, your body now isn’t the same as it will be in 1 or 5 or 10 or 20 or 50 years, just like it isn’t the same as it was at any point in your life before now. our bodies are never supposed to stop growing and aging and changing throughout our lives. there’s no guaranteeing that we’ll love every single change our bodies go through, but that’s okay! there are so many things in life that are more important than the way our bodies look. even if you go on t and lose your hair and don’t like how it looks, your life won’t be ruined; plenty of other things will bring you joy and more than make up for the insecurities.

just think about the gender euphoria and relief from dysphoria that t could give you. would losing your hair be bad enough to outweigh all of that? or is it just the pressure of a society that decided balding is bad that’s making you fear one single change despite how much joy you could have if you let that fear go? only you can decide if going on t is worth the potential downsides for you, but i suspect that for most of us, the benefits of going on t far outweigh the possibility of side effects like hair loss happening down the line.

[wonbin-truther]

casual jaemin x afab! reader - 6.6k words warnings- smut, jaemin can't commit for shit, some jeno x reader, jaemin calls the reader a slut, drinking and smoking, oral (m and f), fingering, pet names (princess, pretty girl, babe), overstimulation, unprotected sex

"not that loser again," chaewon groans as she watches you check your pinging phone for the millionth time. you rolled your eyes at her as karina scoffed, "girl, he's for the streets. please just block him and move on. you're hot. you can pull someone new easily." you gave them a sad smile as you packed up your things, "i have to go." you sped walked into the parking lot where jaemin was leaning against his car. when he spotted your figure he got into his car and started up the engine. you opened the passenger seat and threw your bag into the backseat. "hey jaem," you settled into the passenger seat of the car. you were quick to notice the bright pink acrylic nail on the door. you sank down into the seat as he gave you a kiss on the cheek and sped off towards his house.

"isn't that the girl you always fuck on the dorm couch?" jeno asked jaemin. he turned around and followed his gaze to your figure across the room. you were pressed up against the wall with a man in front of you. he recognized the 'fuck me' eyes you were giving the man as he was all too close to your lips. jeno patted his arm, "man, if you're jealous maybe you need to ask her out. "no, it's just casual."

casual is the word that rung in your ears since the day you met jaemin at a party for his frat. he had just fucked you dumb as the party echoed downstairs. your legs were shaky as you tried to get yourself decent, but as you looked over at him, you saw him throwing his shirt on casually. his eyes locked on yours before he left the room, "no attachments. remember, this is just casual."

obviously, the two of you had different versions of causal. casual to you wasn't this fancy dinner with his parents. they sat across from you as you sat next to jaemin. "honey are you okay?" his mom asked. you smiled and nodded the best you could with jaemins index and middle finger dragging along your walls under the table. "i-im fine. can i just excuse myself to the bathroom?" you asked. they nodded, concern filling there eyes as you fixed your dress and quickly ran off. "son, go check on her," his dad waved off jaemin who happily stood up and left behind you. that's how you ended up bent over his sink as he moved in and out of you. your moans were muffled by his hand over your mouth as he pounded repeatedly into you. for a moment, you forgot there was nothing casual about being fucked against the bathroom counter as his parents sat out there completely unaware. the thoughts were quickly pushed out by your incoming orgasm. jaemin fucked you through your release and then came inside of you. he waited for you to fix yourself up before leaving the bathroom. you stared at the makeup running down your face and the strands of your hair that stood up. "it's just casual." you reminded yourself.

you were cuddled up to jaemin's chest as he played with your hair. nothing had happened; he just called you over and pulled you into his arms. "you're pretty," he said, kissing the top of your head. you smiled and looked up at him, "so are you." "we make quite an attractive duo, don't we," he left a soft kiss on your lips. no matter how sweet the lingering taste of his chapstick was, it wouldn't overpower the bitterness you felt as he left kisses on your lips as if it were nothing. he always did it. he would kiss you with the passion of 100 men or leave sweet kisses on your lips as though he were in love with you. you hated the soft kisses more than anything. with every feather like peck, you imagined the white picket fence house and two kids but were soon pulled down to reality.

you were at yet another frat party with chaewon and karina. you hated them so much, especially after meeting jaemin. the reason why stood about 6 feet in front of you with his tongue down another girl's throat. "i'm surprised you haven't gotten mono yet," chaewon handed you a red solo cup filled with some mystery liquid. "you need to move on already. he's a bum," karina groaned. "he's nice," you could feel the tears brimming in your eyes. "do not cry over that loser," chaewon grabbed you harshly by the shoulders. "what you need to do is get some non diseased dick and show him what he's missing by playing around." you nodded, downed whatever was in the drink, and made your way through the crowd, knowing exactly who your target was going to be.

naturally you had met jeno within the first couple of weeks fucking around with jaemin. you knew jeno was attracted to you but had some kind of bro code going on. you were quick to find him sitting on the couch, smoking a blunt. you sat in the empty spot next to him, making sure to get as close as possible. he adjusted so that his arm was around you, pulling you into his side. "you saw him, didn't you?" he pressed the roll to your lips and you happily took a hit. "yea. it's nothing serious between us, so it's whatever." "so that's why you came to press on me? because it's whatever," he let out a low chuckle. you put your head on his shoulder, already feeling the weed mix with the alcohol in your system. "if he can go around with other girls then I can be with other guys. it's only fair," you pressed a kiss to jeno's jawline. "careful princess," his hand moved down to grip your waist as you continued to leave open mouth kisses and marks around his neck. he swiftly pulled you into his lap, so you were straddling him. you took a quick glance up and locked eyes with jaemin who looked like he was about to kill jeno. you gave him a smirk before you got up from jeno's lap, taking him by the hand and pulling him upstairs.

jeno watched from his spot on the bed as you cried into your hands. "i just want him to want me like i want him." you were pacing back and forth around the room. "yn that's how he is. did no one warn you?" he replied. "they did and i'm a dumbass for fucking around with that loser, but..." you let out a scream that you hoped was drowned out by the music downstairs. "you're in love with him," jeno laughed. you threw yourself face down onto the bed next to him, "i hope his dick breaks." jeno let out a louder laugh. "i hope so too. being his roommate is rough. maybe if it broke, he wouldn't have a girl over every night." "you're so not helping right now." you got up and gave a light punch to his arm. "if it makes you feel better he's never been as consistent as he is with you." you rolled your eyes and said, "Yeah, that makes me feel so much better. a new girl every night makes me feel a million times better." "just tell him you like him. trust me, he doesn't even know it yet, but he likes you back," jeno stood up and stretched. "i'll tell him we fucked if it makes you feel better." you stood up and followed behind him, grabbing his hand, "yeah we can tell him that."

contact with jaemin after that night had been minimal. "don't tell me you're stressing over that dumbass," karina sighed loudly. you were sitting beside her, jumping at every notification. "i'm not," you lied right through your teeth. "i saw you and jeno go upstairs at the party. why not get one over on him and start fucking his friend?" she stood up from her seat next to you. "maybe. good luck on the test," you pulled up jeno's contact and sent him a quick 'jaemin there?' text.

you paced back and forth in jeno's room. "is this going to become a reoccurring thing?" he asked. jeno was sitting at his desk shirtless for whatever reason and doing what looked like calculus homework. "no but why won't he text me?" you punched him repeatedly on the back. he spun around, grabbing your hands, "he's jealous, that's why." as jeno said that, the door swung open. "hey bro, have you seen my-" the clear voice of jaemin was cut off mid-sentence when he saw the two of you. he quickly walked out of the room as you freed yourself from jeno's grasp. "well now he really thinks we're together," jeno said. you stood there frozen for a moment before throwing yourself onto jenos bed, kicking and screaming into the sheets, "he hates me!" "he doesn't. he's just jealous. he probably hates me, though."

you rummaged around in your drawer, looking for the white lacy bra you had taken a liking to. "what the fuck, where is it?" you mumbled to yourself as you took out everything from your drawer. you sat on the floor with your back against the dresser, thinking back to where it could possibly be. if you could see your complexation right now, your face would probably be drained of color. you pushed yourself off the floor and made your way to your bed. you sat on the soft white sheets as you shakily picked up your phone. you stared at jaemin's contact.

hey jaemin ik we havent talked in a while and you're probably not too happy with me but do you have that white bra i really like

as soon as you sent the text, you practically threw your phone to the other side of the room. it took 15 minutes for a notification ping to come from your phone.

i think so. come over

you couldn't fight the smile forming on your face as you got up, grabbed your bag, and rushed out of the house.

you knew the directions to jaemin's frat house better than you knew your way around your childhood home. you rang the doorbell and bounced on your heels as you waited for someone to answer the door. you were met with the face of mark lee. "dude it's been so long," he said as he pulled you in for a hug. you returned the hug with a huge smile on your face, "it really has." out of everyone in the frat, mark had always been your favorite. you two became close through your late night cravings when you stayed the night with jaemin. mark was always up late, strumming his guitar in the living room as you made ramen. you would listen to him play, eventually growing into you eating in the living room as he told you stories about Canada and explained the meanings of each song he played on his guitar. "Is that yn?" another voice piped up. you pulled away from mark to look in the direction but were engulfed in another hug. you could recognize from the grasp the man had on you that it was haechan. he was another member of the frat you had a natural gravitation to. he had been your lab partner in your first year biology class but quickly became a close friend due to the amount of time you spent around the frat. mark and haechan were also the first to warn you about jaemin. you pulled away as he asked, "why are you here?" "why do you think?" you sighed out as you walked farther into the house. mark nodded, "figured. he's in his room." "I could treat you better. you need to leave him already," haechan whined. you just laughed as you walked up the stairs to his room.

you knocked on the door and pushed it open, not waiting for a response. jaemin was sitting on his bed but stood up when you walked in and said, "it's in the top drawer." you went over and opened it. it was the first thing at the top, along with a lipgloss you knew wasn't yours. you sighed as you picked up the bra and closed the drawer. you turned around and dropped the bra, nearly jumping back at the sight of jaemin so close to you. you tried to take a step back but bumped into the dresser. he held your chin with his thumb and index finger and lifted your head up until your eyes met his. "so jeno huh?" he smirked. you wanted nothing but to kiss the smug look off of his face, but you stayed strong, just nodding. "i'm not yours, jaemin," you moved away from his grasp and tried to move aside but he trapped you with his arms. "oh yea?" "yea. i was never yours to begin with."

jaemin moved some of your hair behind your ear. "you have quite the attitude now, princess." you could feel your resolve weakening with every inch he moved closer. all you could do was stare up at him. "no words now?" his nose was practically knocking into yours. you decided to close the gap, kissing him with as much force as you could muster. your hands found their way into his hair as his found their way to your hips. he picked you up and moved you to the bed, breaking the kiss. he was quick to move on top of you and pin your hands above you so you couldn't move. you squirmed in his grasp. "such a slut. fucking my friend and now wanting me?" he tsked. his kisses trailed down your neck to your collarbone. you let out whimpers and moans as he left love bites and hickeys all over. "jaem the door," you tried your best to free yourself of his grasp but his grip only got tighter. "what? don't want jeno to see how good I can fuck you?" he let go of your wrists so he could take off your top and bra. he was quick to rid himself of his own shirt. "gonna be a good girl?" he asked, leaving a soft kiss on your lips.

the kiss left you unable to speak, only nodding and staring at him. "use your words pretty girl," he tapped your cheek lightly. "gonna be a good girl," you whimpered out. his hands had found their way into your pants and his fingers were hovering over the wet patch on your panties. "does jeno get you this worked up," jaemin's fingers moved the thin material out of the way and slipped into you. "only you," you threw your head out as he moved in and out. he could feel the way you were clenching around him as he hit the gummy spot inside you with his index and middle finger. jaemin knew your body better than you knew your own so he could tell from the way you clenched around him you were close to your orgasm. he pulled his fingers out of you and you stared at him wide-eyed. "dont you think you deserve some punishment for being a slut? fucking my best friend and then coming back here. what would jeno think, pretty girl?" he pulled off your bottoms and moved down so that he was eye to eye with your clit. "jaem please," you whined as he kissed the inside of your thighs."have patience, princess," he said as he kissed your wet clit.

he flicked the bundle of nerves with his tongue as he started to suck and lick at it. jaemin always ate you out like a starved man. at first, you had been hesitant to let him after the bad experiences you had with your ex boyfriend but jaemin was quick to reassure you. you could feel your release coming quick again and you were a little embarrassed. you realized he was under the impression jeno had fucked you but in reality you hadn't been with another person since the last time you were with jaemin, which was around a month now.  "close," you managed to get out, pulling at his hair and arching your back. "let go, princess. i got you," he pulled away for a moment to say but quickly got back to work. with those words, you allowed yourself to release all on his tongue. He continued to kiss and lick at your clit, overstimulating you. you pulled at his hair as you begged him to stop. it fell upon deaf ears as he continued to eat you out. jaemin knew if you really meant it, you would call out the safe word you two had made up around your second meeting. he continued to eat you out through your second release. he pulled away and made his way to your lips.

you pulled off his pants and boxers. "ready to repay the favor?" jaemin asked and sat on the edge of the bed. you nodded and rushed to your feet, only to drop to your knees in front of him. he tapped your lips with his cock in his hand and you happily opened up, taking his tip into your mouth. you could already taste the salty precum as you took more and more of him into your mouth. he threw his head back and let out low groans as you moved your head up and down his length. jaemin was never shy about the noises he made. it was another shock you got after being with him for the first time. he grabbed a handful of your hair and pushed your head down until you took in all of him. you gagged and dug your nails into his thighs as your throat adjusted to him. he waited a second before using the grip on you hair to move you again. you closed your eyes and focused on not gaging as he continued to use you. "eyes open, princess," he said between groans. you opened your eyes and stared up at him. the sight alone had him faltering in his grasp, allowing you to move on your own again. he came down your throat, and you pulled off him with a pop.

you climbed back onto the bed and laid down. jaemin moved on top of you and lined himself up, "ready? he never asked before he fucked you, so you hesitated a little before nodding. "we don't have to. i mean you can leave now if you want," jaemin was fumbling over his words as he rushed to get off of you. "please just fuck me already," you said, grabbing his hand. he smiled and kissed your nose, moving on top of you again and thrusting into you. he bottomed out and waited for you to adjust to him. you nodded, and he started to move. your nails dug into his back, and he lifted your legs to allow himself to move deeper into you. "jeno didn't fuck you this good huh, princess?" he said as he quickened his pace. "no one like you, jaem," you babbled out. you continued to babble his name as though it was the only word you knew. he hit your g-spot repeatedly, making you clench around him. your release hit you line a train, shaking and clenching around him. he was quickly behind you, opting to let out inside of you. he collapsed onto the empty spot next to you as both of you caught your breath. after a few minutes of silence, he broke it, "you should leave before jeno gets here."

"and I didn't even get my stupid bra I hate him," you screamed from your bed. karina sat on her bed across from you and chaewon was on the desk chair. "i cant believe you," chaewon groaned. "he's never made me leave right after sex before. what does he think i am? a piece of meat?" you cried. "yes!" the two yelled in unison. "you need to ignore him. block him on everything. he's no good for you," karina tossed her pillow at you. "i can't" you watched as the pillow dropped right in front of your bed. "give me ill do it," chaewon walked over to you and held her hand out. maybe a jaemin cleanse is what you need. you put your phone into her hand and fell back onto your bed. when she handed you the phone back, his number had been deleted, and any trace of him in your life was gone.

"she blocked me," jaemin yelled out. everyone around the table looked up at him. "which one?" chenle asked. there was some snickers from the other guys. "i'm not some common whore; what do you mean, which one," jaemin glared at the younger boy. jeno started laughing, hitting the table as he nearly choked on his food. jaemin switched his glare from chenle to jeno, "anyways. yn blocked me." "it's about time," haechan clapped. "it was bound to happen," jisung patted jaemin on the back. "you're all my biggest haters. i've done nothing wrong," jaemin went to check your instagram and noticed he was also blocked there.

"dude i mean you have led her on for a while now. girls are always blocking you, so why does it matter," mark asked. "it's different," jaemin sighed and placed his phone down. "how is it different?" the older male asked. "it just is." "so you like her?" jisung asked from beside him. "what happened?" renjun walked into the room, sitting on the other side of jaemin. "his crush blocked him," haechan responded. "oh yn?" renjun turned to jaemin who groaned and buried his head in his hands. "well dude, you fumbled, so now you need to find a way to get her back," chenle said as he stood up, excusing himself from the room.

it was hard to avoid jaemin when it seemed like he was everywhere you went. "he's doing it on purpose. just ignore him," chaewon said as she picked at her sandwich. "im trying, but it's hard when he's literally everywhere." the nerves from trying to avoid jaemin all day had severely affected your appetite. any glimpse of him had you feeling nauseous from anxiety. "think with your brain, not your pussy," karina scolded you. "what if i gave him one last chance," you whined. "be serious. he's been on his last chance for 10 chances now," karina hit you in the back of the head. "what good does he serve you anyway? and dont mention his dick," chaewon's question made you think for a moment. "see nothing," the black haired girl said. "he's nice to me," you pouted. "no he's nice to your vagina." "i need air," you said, standing up and walking out the cafeteria doors.

the school's campus had a lot of greenery. you always loved walks around the campus because of it. however you had no time to enjoy it as an all-too-familiar person walked up to you. you tried to walk faster, but he grabbed your wrist, keeping you in place. "please just talk to me," jaemin begged. you were about to give in, but decided it was finally time to stand your ground to the man, "let me go." "please. i didnt do anything wrong; please talk to me," jaemin begged. the sentence made your anger completely wash over you. "you didn't do anything wrong?" you laughed. "you never do anything wrong. leading me on for months is completely fine. so is treating me like your girlfriend and then telling me there's nothing serious between us? oh also fucking other girls but getting mad at me for even talking to another guy is completely okay too." "you had sex with jeno and i didn't say anything," jaemin tried to rebuttal, but you just scoffed at him. "i didn't. i didn't have sex with anyone. i went to that room and complained about you the whole time because i like you, jaemin. i've liked you since the moment i met you. but you're too much of an idiot to even realize what's going on in front of you. i'm done with your games, jaemin and i'm done being just another body," you turned on your heel and sped away from him. jaemin stood frozen in his place. the only thought that ran through his brain was that he fucked up big time.

you sat on your bed, crying into your hands. you sobbed from the anger you felt. his words echoed in your head. did he seriously think he did nothing wrong? did he really think screwing with your feelings was okay? you also sobbed from the sadness of it all. you missed him. you missed sitting on his bed as he helped you with chemistry homework. you missed the late night talks about the future and your lives, but the memories were overtaken by the anger of how you were just another girl to him.

"why did you tell me you two had sex?" jaemin yelled at jeno who was seated on his own bed. "i didn't tell you shit. you jumped to that conclusion on your own. all i said was, i went upstairs with her," jeno watched the brown haired man pace around the room, the scene all too familiar from the last time you were over to talk to jeno. "i'm such an asshole," jaemin groaned. "glad you've realized," jeno said, standing up and patting jaemin on the back. "it's going to take a while, but she'll come around. just don't screw it up in the meantime. which means stop fucking random girls every night." jaemin nodded in response. "i have class, but i'll try to talk to her after," and with that final word, jaemin was now alone in the shared bedroom. he laid on his bed and stared at the ceiling. he definitely fucked up big time.

"babe whats wrong?" karina had walked into the room and was met with your figure bundled in layers of blankets and crying. "maybe i messed up," you wiped your eyes and moved over so she could sit on the edge of the bed. "messed up what?" she pushed some of the hair from in front of your face back. "with jaemin. i think i messed up," you cried harder as you told her what happened on the walk. she let out a soft sigh and pulled you into a hug, "listen. me and chae might give you shit about him, but if you're sitting here sobbing over him, then maybe there's things we don't know. if you like him this much then go for it. we'll support you." you sobbed into her shoulder and clung to her. "wanna go get ice cream from the cafeteria?" she asked. you pulled away and nodded.

it had been a week without contact with jaemin. to say it was hard on you was an understatement. you felt too embarrassed to unblock him and dm him like a normal person but every time you saw him in the cafeteria, you would feel a pull to talk to him. however whenever you started making your way over, he would walk away as if he had a fifth sense for your presence. "don't look now," chenle nudged jaemin at the table. jaemin looked up from his phone slightly and was met with you laughing with your friends at the table across from his. he didn't say anything and just looked back down at his phone. "she still has you blocked?" haechan asked. jaemin chose not to respond. the answer was already clear. haechan just groaned, "why can't you two just make up already?" I miss having her around." "no you miss someone doing the dishes," jeno sat down next to jaemin. "listen you just need to talk to her," jeno said. "i can't. she blocked my number and my instagram. how am i supposed to talk to her," jaemin put his phone down and put his head in his hands. "like a normal person. just walk up to her," mark chimed in. all jaemin could do was let out a groan and put his head down on the table.

it had now been a month since you cut jaemin out of your life. after that first week of regret, you started feeling better and better. you felt less on edge as the days went on. that's probably how you ended up at a frat party with chaewon and karina, who disappeared within the first few seconds. haechan had found you a few minutes into standing against a wall and pulled you into the kitchen, where the makeshift bar was set up. it had started with haechan making you do one shot with him. then mark walked in and you did one with the three of them. by the time you knew it, you had lost count of how much was in your system. you were stumbling around until you bumped into someone's broad chest. you looked up, and your eyes started to glaze over as your gaze met jaemins. you felt a tear slip down your cheek as the shocked look on his face only grew. you tried to get an apology out and move away from him but nothing came out. you tried to move back but stumbled over your feet. a strong arm wrapped around your waist, and a soft sigh was let out, "lets get you upstairs."

you were situated on jaemin's bed as he rummaged around for spare clothes for you. he pulled out an old t-shirt and pajama pants and laid them down next to you. "i'll turn around and close my eyes," jaemin said, facing the wall and shut his eyes, as to respect your privacy. it was a little ironic seeing as how many times jaemin saw you in your natural state. there was some rustling before you spoke up in a hushed tone, "can you help, please?" the quietness of your voice was something jaemin had never heard before. if it weren't for the silence of the room and the door drowning out the party downstairs, he would have never heard you. he turned around knelt on the floor in front of you. he slipped off your shoes and placed them on the floor next to the bed. he then undid your pants and slid them off you, replacing them with the pajama pants. he stood up and smiled as you lifted your arms up for him. he was quick to replace your disregarded shirt with the new one. as he folded the clothes and set them on the dresser, you spoke up again, "please dont leave me." your voice was shaky, and it broke jaemin to a million pieces to hear you so torn down because of him. "are you sure?" he turned to face you. "i need you to stay," a tear slipped down your cheek. he moved to pull you into a tight hug as you sobbed into his chest. you had fistfuls of his shirt as he stroked your hair, "i'm not going to leave, princess. not again. i promise." he whispered to you. eventually the sobs got quieter, and your breathing evened out. he laid you down on the bed, covering you with the cover. he was about to get up and move to jeno's bed until he realized you still had a handful of his shirt. so there he lay in his jeans and t-shirt with you cuddled into his chest and his arms wrapped around you as if you would fade to dust at any moment.

you woke up with a throbbing headache, but that was the least of your worries after you tried to shift around but couldn't move. you were too scared to open your eyes but you found the courage after you realized your arm was falling asleep. the first thing you saw was a chest. you followed it up and saw jaemin's sleeping face. you tensed up for a bit and quickly scanned your body, but you found yourself completely dressed. you relaxed, trying not to wake him up as you slowly wiggled out of his arms. his grip only gor tighter as his eyes fluttered open. he had a soft, peaceful look on his face as he tried to adjust to his surroundings. once he realized what was going on, he practically jumped out of bed. "i'm so sorry. i meant to sleep in jeno's bed i forgot," the apologies stumbled out of his mouth as you sat up and let out a laugh. "it's alright. we didn't do anything, right?" "no. of course not. you were drunk," jaemin ran his hand through his hair and began to fidget with his fingers. "we need to talk," you two both said at the same time.

"you first. i probably did enough talking last night," you could feel how sore your eyes were and assumed you had been crying, which also took you to the conclusion you let something spill. "yea you did and i'm sorry for being such an asshole. if you dont want to forgive me it's okay but i'm so sorry. you're the best thing to happen to me and i don't know how i fucked it up so bad," jaemin sat on the bed in front of you. "i forgave you a long time ago," you cupped jaemins cheeks in your hands, wiping the tears he didn't even know where coming out. "i'm so serious about you this time. please just give me another chance. ill treat you how you should be treated," jaemin put his forehead against yours. "and how should i be treated?" you asked. "like a work of art," jaemin's lips were ghosting over yours. "well show me how serious you are," you closed the space between you two.

the kiss was gentle, unlike all the others you two had shared. this one was slow, and nothing felt rushed. you could taste the fading vanilla of his chapstick as his lips moved rhythmically against yours. you pulled away but moved back with your arms wrapped around his neck. you pushed him back, and his hands met your waist. he pulled away, "we don't have to." "i want to," you said, moving on top of him to straddle him. "you sure?" "i've never been more sure in my life." he locked your lips again as his hands moved underneath your shirt. you broke the kiss so he could lift it over your head. he flipped the two of you over, taking off his shirt and then fumbling with your bra. he left open mouth kisses down your neck and towards your chest. he pulled away, "you're so beautiful." you could feel the heat rising up your face. this wasn't the first time he'd called you beautiful, but somehow it felt different. "i love you," the words slipped off your tongue as if it was a natural statement. jaemin smiled and kissed your forehead, "love you too." you smiled and started to pull at the button on his jeans. he helped you take them off along with his boxers and then took off your own pants and underwear.

he pecked your lips before sliding into you. the two of you let out matching groans as you fluttered around him. although you had told everyone you moved on from jaemin in the month the two of you weren't together, you found it hard to have sex without thinking of him so the stretch felt almost unnatural. you dug your nails into his back, eliciting another loud groan from him. "you can move," you said. he nodded and started to rock back and forth. he kept a gentle rhythmic pace. it was different from all the other times when he would drill into you with no care, moving hard and unsteady, just looking to chase his own high. he kissed you again, and he moved a little faster when you started to squeeze around him. you kissed him back, moaning into the kiss. you were close and he knew that. his hand traveled downward, rubbing circles into your clit with the pad of his thumb. you were first to come, leaving a white ring around his cock. he fucked you through the orgasm, pulling out and coming on your stomach when he felt it hit him.

he stood up, throwing on sweats and walked out. you threw your head back and sighed, thinking this was the same as all the other times you had been with jaemin. you were about to get up and gather your things when jaemin walked back in with a towel. he gave you a confused look and went over onto the bed. "lay back down. i got you," he said, cleaning you off with the towel as you let your head fall back onto the pillow. "i thought you were going to leave or kick me out like you always do," you were quiet, and jaemin could sense the sadness in your voice. "i told you yn. i'm serious about you. i want this to work," he threw the towel into his laundry bin and found an oversized shirt for you. he slipped it onto you and then laid next to you. you were hesitant to move closer to him, but he pulled you into his chest and kissed the top of your head. "i want you to trust me. i know i haven't been that trustworthy for a while but i need you to believe me." you looked up at him with a small smile on your face, "i trust you. i've trusted you for so long already." 

 you sat on your bed, recounting the events to karina and chaewon. both of them were speechless by the end of it. "so what happened after?" chaewon broke the silence. "we took a nap and when we woke up we had a talk on how we wanted to take things slow," you were giggling and kicking your feet on the bed. "even if we dont like jaemin that much we support you. this is the first time i've seen you come back from a hookup with that man with the weird post sex glow," karina said, making chaewon nod. "how do i usually look," you tilted your head, staring at the two across the room.  after a moment of thinking chaewon responded, "like a bus hit you." you were about to argue with her until your phone lit up. you were quick to pick it up, seeing it was a text from jaemin. 

meet you in the park in 10?

you were quick to text back 

yea see you there

the days flew by and soon enough, they became weeks. you were walking hand in hand with jaemin around the dimly lit campus. he suddenly paused, making you stop and turn towards him with confusion written all over your face. "be my girlfriend," he was practically yelling from nerves. "jaem quiet; it's nighttime," you scolded him, your voice hushed. you then processed what he had asked you, "wait what?" "be my girlfriend," he repeated. you tackled him into a hug, kissing all over his face. he caught you in his arms, stumbling back a little, "is that a yes?" you nodded and left a kiss on his lips, which he happily returned. so much for being casual.

[paigebueckersmommy]

maybe not enemies pt.1 - p.b

paige bueckers x fem!roomate! reader

warnings: enemies to lovers, drinking, mean paige kinda?, 1st person

a/n: i am well aware the team rooms togther but act like they don’t for this fic 🥰 also i hate this with every bone in my body.

you and paige had met briefly a few times. all you knew was you two weren’t into the same things.

it was the start of my senior year of college, and i had always taken my academics seriously, but i needed to take them more serious this year, and geting roomed with the schools biggest party animal, caused problems.

i began unpacking the suit case on my bed, waiting for my roomate to arrive. they sent an email with dorm assignments, which your roomate obviously hadn’t seen.

when i heard the door open, i snapped head. “fuck.” you heard a attractive voice say, which you didn’t wanna admit was attractive. “i’m not happy about this either.” you say making eye contact with the blonde.

“how’d you know?” paige says setting stuff down on her bed, “they sent an email.” i say looking back at my stuff.

“well, the best way to handle being roomed with the most boring person on earth, is if we agree to not talk unless it’s needed.” paige said, with an look of annoyance on her face. “agreeed, just please don’t be loud.” you say rolling your eyes, “k.”

time skip to a couple months later

you could tell paige was a little confused by your style when she mostly only ever saw you wearing hoodies, sweatpants and leggings, but tonight was diffrent.

you were standing infront of the mirror on a saturday night, putting lipgloss on. wearing a mini skirt and a mesh long sleeve, a black lacey bra underneath.

“where you going? shouldn’t you be studying or sum shit.” paige said looking you up and down from her bed. “why would it matter to you? but for your infortntion i’m going to a bar with my friends.” i say, looking back at her.

“oh my god!!! she has friends everyone!!” paige says acting suprised, not very good acting. “just because i care about my academics more than you doesn’t make me a nerd.”

“oh please, admit you’re just stating and don’t have any friends.” paige says cocking her head, when jsut then you heard a knock on your door. you opened it, your friends head peaking thru the door. “you almost rea- hey. wanna come?” your friend says, making eye contact with paige mid sentence.

“oh? inviting me? fuck it, yea lemme get dressed.”

you step out of your dorm room, shocked by the interaction. “damn. she barley talks to me i don’t know why she’d wanna come out with-“ you stopped mid sentence when paige walked out of your dorm. she was wearing white pants and a pink crop top, you had only ever seen her wear basketball gear so you were a little shocked at this.

“mm.. she knows how to dress everyone.” you say matching paige’s pace in the hallway as two of your friends were a little in front of you.

“oh i know your not talking. this is the 3rd time ive ever seen you not wear a hoodie. probobly why you don’t have a boyfriend yet.”

“b-boyfriend? i’m sorry, what makes you think i like men?” you say crooking your head words paige, curious. “o-oh i’m sorry, i just-“

“your good. i get a lot that i look straight.. but im lesbian.” you say with a soft smile making eye contact with paige, as you realize she’s also smiling.

“hm. good to know.” paige says, looking your outfit up and down, and that’s whe your mind began spinning.

did i like paige? was she trying to tell me something? were we, not enemies?

you put those thoughts to the side as you reached the doors of the bar. it was a saturday night, so it was crowded but not as crowded as it is on fridays. you, paige and your two friends found spots at the bar, paige sitting next to you as she ordered a round of shots for you two without even asking what you wanted.

“oh? thank you? your not being mean to me for once?” you say out of confusion before downing the shot. “mmm. you don’t look half as bad tonight.”

“could say the same about you.”

pt 2 soon!!!

[tremendously-crazy]

"You can't hate on an entire Sherlock Holmes adaptation just because of how they interpret Irene Norton (nee Adler)-" SHUT UP.

I will hate on an adaptation if it does the following:

makes Irene a love interest for Sherlock Holmes (whether realized or not).

First of all, Holmes is NOT attracted to women, and never experiences a smidgen of attraction towards them in the original stories. ACD could have very easily written him a love interest, but CHOSE NOT TO because it went against the idea of his character. He was never attracted towards women.

Second of all, Irene Adler isn't even Irene Adler. Her name is Irene NORTON. Do you want to know why? Because she's LITERALLY MARRIED. TO A LAWYER NAMED GODFREY NORTON. She already has a husband who she loves very much! She does not love Holmes!

Thirdly, a man can feel admiration for a woman without being attracted to her. Watson literally says in the first part of A Scandal in Bohemia that he didn't feel any emotion akin to love for Irene Adler!!

2. makes Irene into some sort of femme fatalle/sexually appealing

This implies that women can only be smarter than men if they are attractive/hot. That, in order for a woman to be successful, she has to provide something for a man.

Edit: this doesn't mean that she ISNT attractive. She is beautiful and enthralling, which is what makes the king fall for her in the first place. What I mean is when Irene becomes a SEXUALIZED character.

Doing this means she can't just be a smart woman, but that she has to be sexually attractive and mysterious, too! DOING THIS REDUCES HER INTO AN OBJECT OF DESIRE!!!

3. makes her weak/makes her get outsmarted by Holmes

Im not sure if any adaptations have actually done this. But if so. Absolutely not. She challenges Holmes's misogynistic ideals and to reform his views. Because Holmes views women as softer, weaker, and less intelligent (when they are NOT!!) And Irene helps to teach him this. Her lesson is effective!! Because Holmes stops making fun of women. And he changes his ways. Why would you make her weaker? She's SUPPOSED to beat Holmes.

If it does this or anything else I will NOT view the adaptation. You can tell a lot about the adaptors, their respect and accuracy while depicting the original stories, and how they view women, through their interpretation of Irene Norton. She is the most famous female character in the series, after all. Do her RIGHT! READ A SCANDAL IN BOHEMIA BEFORE YOU ADAPT! And if you still make these amateur mistakes, you shouldn't be adapting Sherlock Holmes at all.

[tragedyslut]

“ the rumours, are terrible and cruel but honey most of them are true ”

𝑝𝑟𝑜𝑙𝑜𝑔𝑢𝑒 : read part 1 + part 2 here <3

𝑚𝑒𝑛 𝑑𝑛𝑖, 𝑏𝑖𝑚𝑏𝑜!𝑓𝑒𝑚 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑒𝑟, 𝑙𝑜𝑠𝑒𝑟!𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑖𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙𝑖𝑎𝑚𝑠, 𝑚𝑒𝑎𝑛!𝑠𝑢𝑏 𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑖𝑒, 𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑖𝑒 𝑏𝑒𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑖𝑛 𝑑𝑒𝑛𝑖𝑎𝑙 𝑙𝑚𝑎𝑜, 𝑓𝑖𝑔𝑢𝑟𝑒 𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑡 <3

you didn't feel bad at all for sending her nudes to everyone. she got what was coming.

ellie woke up the next morning, with a feeling of dread. she didn't know what had happened, but she had a feeling. a bad one. she knew exactly what had happened when she opened Instagram to a bunch of dms, most containing her nudes with captions calling her various names.

she immediately went back onto your Instagram, seeing that you hadn't stop promoting your OF. it made her blood boil that you'd do something like that to her and act like nothing happened, but then again, she did it first. she then clicked message, and typed out a long message to you.

" hey, y/n. i just wanted to say that you're a fucking dick for spreading my nudes around like that. i sent them to people i liked, you just send any random guy everything for money. you're a slut and im glad everyone on campus has seen how much of a weird fucking slut you are. you had no right to send my nudes around like that. at least i don't send them to random men. "

sent. seen. y/n.Instagram.name is typing..

she knew she didn't have any right to be mad. just the sight of you typing back further embedded the realisation that she was in the wrong. she did all of this just because she wouldn't admit she was attracted to a girl.

" at least i get money out of it, you're this pathetic for free. " was the only thing you responded with. you were sitting in your room with a few friends, absolutely loosing it over the text. ellie really couldn't take what she dished out and it was funny.

meanwhile ellie was sobbing in her bed, she was angry, but overall, she was guilty and confused. why the fuck did she need to be such a bitch? she hated herself for doing all that now. she would probably never get to be with you now.

that night she spent scrolling through your gorgeous pictures whilst she desperately fucked herself. you were right, she was this desperate, and for free. but that didn't stop her.

the next day, she slumped her way into class, half asleep. she kept thinking about you. you were sitting away from her this time. everytime she looked up she'd earn a glare or an exaggerated "what the fuck are you looking at" expression. which was all deserved, yet she was still sitting there feeling sorry for herself.

the lecturer then said something about getting into groups of two. she frantically looked around, realising that nobody in the class actually wanted to pair with her. they all bunched up away from her, forming mini groups and voting you and her out like this was fucking survivor or something. it pissed her off. even more so when she realised that she would have to work with you. she really had to choice. even if you might end up punching her in the throat.

𝑝𝑡4

taglist hotties! :

@fakevalentine

@toosweetfm

@pr1nc3ss-sc4r

@claymoreshaze

@bready101

@amberputh

@lil-elliesgf

[livinahey]

aaaaaastrobs-essions (jk) .・゜゜・

---

i'm back :)

.・。.・゜✭・.・。.・゜✭・»»————>

if you struggling with low self esteem go to fire sun/earth mars/venus in angles (1h/4h/7h/10). They will cheer you up and remind you that you deserve fine things in life 💅✨🧚‍♀️ just dont fake your insecurities to them or theyll disgusted by you

speak of self esteem, someone that have their asteroid medusa (149) in your 2nd are the one that silently judge and mock you. the one that try to attack your self esteem. the one that underestimate you; and will start to think "whats cool about them?" if you get great achievement in life. EVEN think that you dont deserve that and it should be them because they think theyre way much better than you 😹😹 what a bitch. beware of them try to steal your great things as a result ‼️😒👹💥💥

asteroid nemesis (128) in house shows ab whats hurt you then you develop animosity/hatred to it, check the theme of the house

1h - hatred towards self identity, hatred towards how people see you, you can hate your looks :(

2h - hatred towards possessions. You may lacks of material possessions, feel less than others in that area and you hate it

3h - hatred towards sibling, neighbor

4h - hatred towards family

5h - hatred towards "spotlight", flings, drama, childlike spirit

6h - hatred towards coworker, health (you may feel youre less healthy than others)

7h - hatred towards partner (✋💀💀), partnership itself. you likely wanna do everything alone

8h - hatred towards mystery. you hate it when someone hides something from you, not clear ab something, keeping something from you, being secretive

9h - hatred towards um.... tw religions. sorry you probably hate particular beliefs. hatred towards travelling, inlaws are also possible

10h - hatred towards public image, fame. you can hate public figures, famous person 😹😹 (im laughing because yeah we all know public figure often are not what they show on the media aka theyre fake)

11h - hatred towards friend, hatred towards what you see on internet. can be indicator of someone that dont like to use social media, or you give hate speech/comments on social media

12h - hatred towards whats "out of reach"

cardinal moons are pure souls that surrounded by "darkness". they can easily influenced by negativity from their surrounding so they MUST, i say MUST to keep good ppl around them or....bye (aka they can turn themselves into the evil)

what's with sag venus and having interest in things that they shouldnt be interested to

taurus women have this fiery strong badass facade to them, while the men looks like cute puppy (and wise???) lmao (for sun moon mars)

mutable mercury in first decan (0°-9°) why are you like to lie for no reason. are prone to say what they dont really mean. go seek better hobbies!

some of leo sun men are gay but they hide it by having love relationship with women... that's very weird (and irritating) of you

undeveloped earth venus only falls for/want to dating popular goodlooking mf even if in personality wise theyre not that best and it can leads to unfulfilling relationship 💁‍♀️

talk ab earth venus, i see them always fall for fixed sign venus (no im not referring them fixed venus as bad one that i mentioned above)

developed earth venus? they dont need to be with someone to increase their status, they simply being the (true) great person they are 🤩 (they know how to and do get the good life by themselves!!)

what i like ab fire moon is theyre so passionate but sometimes it can be too passionate where it leads to them making unnecessary drama 😭😭

water suns are prone to being delusional 😹😹

air venus stop giving mixed signals

i cant help but think ab where sagittarius in your chart shows what's "wild", "crazy" about you. thats why pluto in sag generations being seen as scary bcs the power (pluto rules ab power) they have.... 😹😹

moon-neptune aspects 🤝 say something then regret it

libra big 6 placements 🤝 attract petty ppl (and then get attacked, being seen as bad one when they just want to defend/protect themselves :()

undeveloped fixed moon 🤝 being petty

pluto in earth house (2h/6h/10h) are the brat but loved lmao

aqua mars 🤝 makes ppl amazed

air sign jupiter give the vibes of unstoppable teenagers (in a good way). see blackpink lisa (aqua jupiter), nct jaemin (gemini jupiter), newjeans hanni (libra jupiter), or another air sign jupiter you know! 😉

saturn-sun aspect are prone to experience unexpected loss :(

there's nothing more i hate in synastry than squaring to venus aspect... bc i feel unwanted there 🧍‍♀️🪓

[ratcash-wasgud]

Tragicomedy II

hey gang, I finally finished this lol sorry it took so long, I just have some complications in my life rn

Anyways, NSFW so minors (and MEN) dni

After the day at the amusement park, Ellie walked home in a cartoonishly bummed way. Which, if you ask me, was pretty understandable. In her head, she had lost every chance in the world with the cutest girl ever, and the worst part was, that she has lost to Abby.

She didn't live in a dorm, the house she basically grew up in was just a couple blocks away from her college, and like 30 minutes away from the amusement park, so she had time to listen to music and stare at the sunset on her way. When she got home, she kicked open the door, and walked past a very concerned looking Joel, and slammed her room's door behind herself. She was acting like a child, she knew that, but she couldn't help it. If today would've went in the way she planned, you could be here too right now, listening to her playing the guitar, marveling at her comic collection, or even...I don't know, sit in her lap or something. But now, it's all ruined because of some straight jock who doesn't deserve you anyways.

Abby on the other hand, is not home yet. Instead of going back to her dorm, she got into her truck, and just went out to the edge of the city, to just...sit there. The last couple months were overwhelming, but today? Yeah, it's taking the crown. She had just started being ok with liking girls, then you came in the picture and suddenly Abby wishes she was still in denial. You saw her cry for fuck's sake. If she wanted to achieve anything, it was the cool and chill persona she had assumed girls like you were attracted to, but nah, she had to fuck it up and almost have a panic attack because of one homophobic comment that wasn't even directed at her. She's so terrified of being gay, of disappointing everyone. That's probably the reason why it was so easy for comphet to eat her alive for so many years.

But then, both women are dragged out of their gloomy moment by a notification lighting up their phone. A new groupchat was just made, by you, and the first text was sent.

"now we have a super cool groupchat, only for super cool people"

"(˵ •̀ ᴗ •́ ˵ )"

Ellie stares at the text. You made a groupchat instead of just texting Abby, which, to her was a success. Abby on the other hand, just didn't understand why did you still think she was cool.

"i wanted to text both of you, but i feel like it's easier this way."

"btw do you guys have plans on friday??"

Perfect. Another chance.

"nah im free." Ellie texts without hesitation, already smiling as she rolls over in bed, staring at her phone. She's already starting to come up with places she could go with you.

"i don't have any plans" Abby texts, her fingers shaking a little. She's happy that you don't hate her, of course, but she's nervous. She doesn"t want to fuck up anything again.

"⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡"

"my grandparents are out of the state for a couple days, and they told me i could hang in their pool!!"

And that is exactly how both Abby and Ellie ended up having a huge watergun fight in your grandparents' backyard. It was amusing, really. They both took it really seriously, like the waterguns you found while searching for a beach matress were completely real, and their life depended on shooting the fuck out of the other.

"Come out, Williams!" Abby yells as she walks up to the shed where she saw that pesky woman run to. "Just give up! Come out with your weapon in the air!"

But, Ellie wasn't in the shed at all, she was behind it. So when Abby tried to enter the shed, she jumped out from behind it, and blasted the bigger woman with cold water all while laughing wickedly. "I got youuuu, you died! I won!"

You just watched them, chuckling to yourself. You were happy. Having friends was cool. I mean, you were watching with a bunch of adoration in your eyes, and your heart was also fluttering, but that's a totally different topic.

"Okay, do you guys want to get in the pool already?" You ask as you start taking off your shirt just to reveal a light purple bikini top decorated with a pink bow.

Ellie swallowed hard. Suddenly her victory didn't even matter to her at all. The only thing that mattered was following you right into water. She peeled her own tanktop off, staying in her own pair of swimwear. This is the most skin she has ever seen you show, and it's already making her mouth dry. She stars sprinting towards the pool and with a huge splash, she lands in the water, drenching the frozen Abby standing next to the pool, who is in complete gay panic, and just stands there, stiffer than ever. She gasps when the cold water hits her skin, and shoots a glare to the auburn haired woman, who's just emerging from under the water. And as we know, revenge is both of their speciality, so Abby peels her own clothes off too and jumps into the water as fast as she can, and her aim is the smaller woman right in the middle of the pool. But as the waves from her jump arrive, they push you right into Ellie's arms.

Ellie, of course, sees the opportunity and takes it right away, wrapping her arms around you from behind. "I got you," She whispers into your ears, and you blush in response. You can't help yourself but lean into the touch, smiling softly. "Yeah...thanks."

Abby comes up from under the water, and sees the scheming that's happening behind her back. She can't let that happen, she can't be left out. She needs to keep up her game. She can't be a coward again. So, she moves towards both of you in the pool, where your feet can touch the tiles on the floor, and she corners both of you.

Abby needs to swallow her nerves. She has to be brave. "I pushed you on purpose." She murmurs, ignoring that you're in Ellie's arms, and puts her hands on your hips under the water. "I wanted to see you fall under the water...and get wet." She says, knowing exactly what she means.

Ellie, on the other hand pulls you closer. "She's already wet. We didn't need your help." She says, lifting her knee to rest between your legs. They didn't know is that you were indeed wet.

"I think she wants my help tho." Abby says, her heart pounding in her chest, but doing her best to not let it show. "Tell her sweetheart," Abby leans closer, her eyes intense. "Tell her you need my help."

You were stunned for a moment, glancing back at Ellie over your shoulder then back to Abby. "I...I need help. From, uhm...both of you." You croak out, her legs wrapping around Abby's waist under the water, while you lean back into Ellie. "Allow me to be selfish."

Both women stopped for a second, considering their options. In that moment, they both realized they didn't hate eachother as much as they thought. Over the time of then hanging out with you, and through that, eachother. Ellie learned that the meat head jock can cry, and isn't afraid of playing with toys or laughing in such a carefree way. Abby learned that the grumpy merd is fierce, and stands up for what she believes in, and that she puts up a fight in whatever she puts her mind to. They learned that they...wouldn't mind this whole thing.

Ellie was the one who moved first, giving Abby a nod, as she snaked her hand lower, along your stomach, right into your bottoms, grazing your lips. Abby shuddered when she saw that, and she just decided to go for it and plant her lips firmly against yours. You kissed her back withouth hesitation, wrapping your arms around her neck, and Abby felt like she was in heaven for a slight second. Ellie watches as her tongue moves with yours, kissing the side of your neck softly as she felt how wet you are down there. She slid a finger inside you, then after a couple thrusts, another. You moaned against Abby's mouth, and in response to that, the bigger girl started kneading your tits gently at first, but she lost self control pretty quickly.

The next thing you knew was that your second orgasm was already fading already, your juices gushing out of you as you're next to the pool on a convenient blanket, while Abby sits right on your face, her pretty pussy reacting to every single lick, while Ellie is between your legs, her cute little cunt against yours, rubbing and chasing her own orgasm, all while they make out, moaning your name into eachothers mouths.

In that moment, Ellie and Abby both decided to stop hating eachother for now.