#he is an absolute menace but he's so lowkey about it that in universe trying to convince ppl that wash is as petty as he is

[tvckerwash]

wash tormenting the reds in the most petty ways possible because he's still pissed off about them hitting him with a car and then blowing him up in s8 is so important to me you don't even understand

[traumxrei-archive]

【 trapped in a daze 】

summary: 'reaching out to you, i cannot have it; but i'm drawn to you' (or, the floydyuu college au that no one asked for but i delivered anyway >:D)

word count: 3.4k (yeah...intense brainrot...)

warnings: college au so all chars are aged up, depictions of drinking and throwing up, some cursing here and there, and. making out. haha.

a/n: this originally was supposed to be krista's request for the 600 followers event, but then it kinda evolved into an...entirely different thing.... this was also lowkey inspired by this song drunk-dazed. n e ways, i hope you enjoy ^^

It wasn't supposed to be like…this.

This being lips against their mouth, the distant blare of party music so far in the back of their consciousness because this kiss was so all-consuming and— Sevens, this was all but too much for their heart to handle.

Looking back at it, the only reason that Yuu had come to this party was to watch over their friends and make sure they didn't drink themselves into an early grave. Their whole plan was to sit in a corner somewhere and try to avoid getting alcohol splashed on them, or worse, thrown up on. But well, nothing ever went according to the plan, did it?

By the fourth hour of the party, the bass from the music was making their head throb. Yuu took a quick look around the room. Ace was chatting up a storm in the middle of a group of students, and Jack was on the other side, playing magnetic darts with Sebek. Deuce and Epel were playing Twister, and maybe it was time that they intervened lest they accidentally sprain something out of sheer stubbornness not to lose.

Yuu was slowly making their way through the crowd when their arm was tugged, almost hard enough to rip from its socket. They whirled around and— Floyd Leech was there, grinning at them coyly, "Shrimpy~ Where ya goin'?"

"I'm saving those two idiots from getting hangovers," They managed to wrestle their arm away from Floyd, who pouted lightly at their actions.

"You aren't going to play with me tonight?" Floyd's words were innocent, but the look in his eyes was anything but.

Yuu swallowed. Curse their past self for even promising the slippery eel anything— especially when that thing was a kiss. Sevens. What was past-them thinking?

Maybe they should rewind a bit. Back to the day that they had the absolute pleasure of meeting the infamous Floyd Leech.

They remembered it very clearly. He had caught their arm in the exact same careless way, demanding that they "played" with him with that stupidly handsome grin on his face. And— with the pretense that they were either going get into something shady, or worse, disappear from the face of the Twisted Wonderland— Yuu did what any normal person would do.

They had kicked him in the nuts. (Which, quite honestly, they do not regret.)

After seeing the university lanyard around the taller’s, or person-who-would-be-taller-if-he-wasn’t-keeling-over-in-pain’s neck, they had paled. They definitely weren’t about to add ‘physical assault of a fellow student’ onto their permanent record.

Yuu had apologized.

Profusely.

Over and over again.

(Something that they regretted because looking back at it, Floyd never once looked mad at them kicking him, only mildly amused. Now-Yuu wondered if it was all an act after all, a pitiful response to illicit their sympathy.)

But after all their efforts, Floyd still wouldn’t let them go. The clock was ticking; they had an important lecture to be at, but the menace wouldn’t let them budge an inch out of that hallway.

Instead, he proposed that terrible-horrible idea of letting him kiss them sometime. The logical side of their brain said it was a nonsense offer to kiss a stranger. But the part of their brain that wanted to leave this situation said that he was a stranger anyway and they would never have to meet him again. And, after all, they had kicked him in the balls on a Monday morning. So one kiss wasn't such an expensive price.

At least, that was what Yuu thought before their friends informed them of Floyd's notoriety. (“You promised the Floyd Leech a kiss?” Ace, of all people had exclaimed, “He literally almost chewed someone’s arm off last semester!”) Predictably, they spent every second after learning the fact regretting it ever since.

Floyd had hounded them day in and day out, and their pride was the only thing keeping them from giving in to his childish demands. Even though it was “just one kiss” they certainly did not want to see the smug satisfaction on Floyd’s irritatingly handsome face after he got what he wanted.

"Later, Floyd," The present Yuu acquiesced, forcing themself to relax slowly. The more they argued with Floyd, the more time wasted getting Deuce and Epel away from breaking all their bones on the Twister board.

"Imma hold you to that. No running, okay?" The eelmer had pressed an uncharacteristically soft hand to the top of their head, before stalking off in the opposite direction. The crowd seemed to part as he got near, and they would've been impressed if they were any other person. Instead, they sagely wished that they were one of the crowd who Floyd Leech didn’t know of. (Then again, would life have been boring without Floyd Leech? That they would never know.)

Now Floyd-less, Yuu made quick work of dragging Epel and Deuce to a couch near the more-sober-but-still-buzzed dart-throwing duo. All the while they both complained loudly about how they “would've won that Twister game” if not for their interference. (For reference, Yuu was quite sure they were on the losing team)

Deuce had snaked an arm around their waist, still arguing with Epel as the other was using their shoulder as a pillow. Meanwhile, Sebek had planted himself on the end of the couch, starting to lecture the two on "safe drinking habits" that the famed "Young Master" had taught him.

Yuu was definitely going to ask for compensation in the form of hard cash once all this was over.

"Could you guys...get off?" They pushed out, trying without success to untangle themself from the pile of drunk humans attached to them.

Jack chuckled, "There's no getting out of that mess without actual intervention."

"So intervene for me," They said sharply. Of course, Jack did nothing but back away, his tail swishing in mischief. The nerve. Even with his golden boy reputation, they didn’t get any special treatment.

And it was with that opportune timing the infamous Ace Trappola decided to grace them all with his presence. But before he could say anything, he was throwing up all over the front of their shirt.

Sevens. Of course, in a room full of strangers it had to be Ace who threw up all over them.

"Oh fuck," The ginger groaned, immediately collapsing to the ground. They sprung up immediately, assessing the damage. Aside from the horrible stickiness of their shirt, it seemed that Epel and Deuce somehow managed to avoid the spray.

"Disgusting," Deuce wrinkled his nose, latching onto Epel instead as they grabbed a handful of tissues from the table to wipe their shirt with.

Ace at least had the decency to look apologetic, "I'm so–"

"Just…don't drink anymore, get a glass of water instead," They dismissed the ginger's guilty stare. "I'm going to attempt to salvage my shirt. We're leaving soon, so Sebek, call a taxi." After making sure that Ace wasn't going to immediately retch again, they started their search for somewhere to wash the vomit off their shirt.

Yuu stumbled right into what looked to be a bathroom, sighing loudly as they ran their hands under the tap. It was just their luck that the bathroom was empty—

"Shrimpy?" The shower curtain slipped open, and sprawled out in the bathtub was fucking Floyd Leech.

What the actual fuck.

The night could not get any worse than this.

Actually, a part of them whispered, it could. Floyd could've had company. Now that would've been infinitely worse. But he was blessedly alone. (This would be the only time Yuu was glad that Floyd was alone.) The eelmer seemed to appraise them, mismatched eyes flicking down to their shirt, the still-running sink, and then back up to their face.

"I didn't throw up," Yuu said sharply, feeling the need to explain that they weren't that idiotic. And then they did a double take, because why would they need to explain themself to Floyd Leech? When they looked up again, Floyd was holding out the jacket he previously wore.

"Don't tell me you're gonna walk around in that all night?" The varsity jacket clinked as he shook it around, and they weighed out their options. The first option was to go home with a shirt half-soaked in Ace-puke. (Gross. Disgusting. Not to mention unsanitary.) And the second option was—

"My arm's getting ti~red~"

Yuu rolled their eyes. Typical Floyd, not even letting them finish a thought. They grabbed it out of his hands without a second thought. The jacket was simple enough with ‘Leech’ emblazoned across the back. And right below it was Floyd's basketball jersey number.

"Impressed?" Floyd prompted, casually propping his head on the tub. "You can have it if you want."

"No," The word was already flying out of their mouth before they could formulate a proper thought. They tried again, "What's the price for this?"

"Boo~ It's just a small favor," He stuck out his tongue. "I'm no Azul, y'know? 'Sides it was starting to get stuffy."

"You guys are close enough for me to be wary," They said curtly, stepping toward the other. It was an odd sight, Floyd looking up at them, still very much comfortable in the tub.

They dragged the shower curtain shut, "If I find you peeking—"

"I'm no perv, Shrimpy," Floyd laughed airily.

Yuu slipped off the stained shirt, running it under the water. Wiping at their torso, they eyed Floyd's jacket. At least it smelled clean, something like tequila and a sharp cologne tangling pleasantly in the air. They finally pulled it on. The jacket was ridiculously big. (Which made sense, considering that Floyd was a giant. Floyd and his twin, Jade, were notorious for somehow breaking the human limits of height. Then again, they weren’t exactly human, were they?) And it already felt ten times better than wearing the puke-shirt. Not like they would tell Floyd that.

And now they had a choice. They could just...leave. The door was unlocked, and Floyd couldn't see them. They would wash the jacket and give it back to Floyd on a later date and be on their merry way. But their conscience prickled slightly. (A terrible thing to happen, especially when it concerned Floyd.)

They dragged back the curtain once more.

Floyd's eyes opened sleepily, "Mmm, I thought you ran away again."

"Again?" They echoed, before backtracking. "No, wait, I just wanted to say thank you before I leave."

"So you were planning on running away," Floyd finally got up, ducking under the curtain bar and stepping out of the tub.

And then he froze. His eyes stayed pinned on their figure. And suddenly the bathroom felt a little too small. They didn't know what he was staring at, but it was starting to unnerve them the longer it went on.

"Um, Floyd...?"

That broke his stupor, lopsided grin returning, "Hey, that's the fourth time you've said my name."

Their brows furrowed, "You were counting—?”

"Could I get that kiss now?" Floyd asked. Their sentences and thoughts skidded to a halt at the wild pitch that was thrown their way. He was always interrupting them, one way or another.

"Now?"

"Now," Floyd said simply, and— since when was he that close to them? The little bastard. He had been slowly backing them up into the wall as they were trying to process everything. They were about to protest when he spoke again, "Or wouldja like me to kiss you in the middle of the cafeteria tomorrow? In front of everyone? That'd be nice too."

"Fine. Now," They sighed, their back hitting the tiled wall. "How do you wanna do this?"

Floyd hummed, "Do you always ask people 'how' they want to kiss you before kissing them?" One of his hands settled against the column of their neck, rubbing at the skin there. They just prayed that Floyd couldn’t feel the racing of their heartbeat against his fingers.

"I don't know, do I?" Yuu exhaled shakily from their mouth as Floyd's chest pressed against theirs. "Guess you'll have to ask the people I've kissed."

"Talking about others when I'm here?" Floyd's tone stayed low even as he whined, and in the dimness of the bathroom, they could see his dual-colored eyes spark with excitement. "I'm hurt, Shrimpy."

"Doesn't look that way to me," They muttered, eyes fluttering shut out of reflex as his hair brushed against their cheek.

Just as they thought Floyd would kiss them, he spoke again, "A young eel's heart is more complex than that."

Their eyes crept open, "Are you actually going to–"

Floyd didn't waste time interrupting them with his actions this time, finally capturing their lips with his own.

Floyd's lips were in no way soft or warm. No, instead he had no problem going against the cliches, his cold lips giving them goosebumps as he pressed in harder. They made a surprised noise when Floyd slipped his tongue into their mouth. There was the sweet aftertaste of tequila against their tongue, even as Floyd smirked against the kiss.

They could feel his teeth skirting dangerously along their lips before he finally bit down. A mangled sound was pulled out of their throat, their nerves singing at the sensation before they shoved hard at his chest, jostling him away.

"Hmm, too much for the first kiss?" Floyd asked, tilting his head sardonically. "But kissing's pretty on you, Shrimpy." Their breaths were coming out in harsh pants and it was annoying how unfazed Floyd looked.

"Did– Y-you bit me–" They tried to look at the bathroom mirror but Floyd's face was crowding against theirs once more.

"Okay, then let's try again," Floyd said lightly, his fingers coming to cup their face once more.

They kept their arm braced against his chest, "It was supposed one kiss."

"Hmm, was it?" Floyd tilted his head. "Well, do you wanna kiss me again, Shrimpy?"

Yuu pursed their lips, gaze subconsciously dropping to the curve of Floyd's mouth. Did they want to kiss Floyd Leech again? Maybe. Would they rather drown in a pool of tequila than admit it and give Floyd the satisfaction? Obviously.

Fuck, tequila. Their tongue swiped across their lips, and they could almost taste the sweet flavor of it.

"Tick tock, Shrimpy," Floyd's voice was a lot closer now, his head now nestled onto their shoulder. "I'm getting bored."

His lips traced over their jaw and they inhaled sharply, "If you're b-bored kiss someone else."

"Don't want those other minnows," Floyd mumbled against their neck, his teeth scraping over their skin. They shivered at the sensation before pressing a hand to their mouth.

"I..."

Yuu didn’t get to finish.

The door slammed open, and they made eye contact with a very confused-looking Deuce.

"Yuu? What are you–?" Deuce seemed to register the intimidating figure that was latched onto them at that moment, his eyes widening. Right. They never locked the door to the bathroom.

"Aha, it's that Macky that's always with you," Floyd said in a humorless tone. In fact, he seemed rather...pissed.

"T-the t-taxi’s here, w-we're going home," Deuce's eyes shifted nervously between them and Floyd, and oddly, down to their neck.

And just as Yuu was about to speak, Floyd spoke up once more, "Shrimpy's with me. So get lost before you get hurt~"

A bewildered expression crossed Deuce's face and Yuu just sighed. If they leave now, they probably didn’t have to see Floyd Leech ever again. Their “favor” had been repaid, and Floyd would have no reason to seek them out. It was the rational thing to do, right? But on the other hand…

Fuck being rational.

"What he said,” Yuu let their hand squeeze at Floyd’s shoulder. “If I don't come back tomorrow he probably disposed of my body in a dumpster, or whatever. Tell everyone to get home safely." And they could feel Floyd physically flinch at their agreement.

There was this overly delighted smile on his face as he pressed a kiss to their nose, "Shrimpy, what're you saying~? I'll take very good care not to hurt you, promise." And they belatedly wondered if they were still drunk from the singular cup of soju Ace handed them a few hours ago. Agreeing to stay with Floyd Leech was definitely not on their list of things to do today. But they already decided to follow their heart, right?

"Now scram, Macky."

Deuce did not need to be told twice. He turned on his heel and immediately shut the door behind him. Floyd strolled up and locked the door.

"Floyd."

"Mhm?"

"Don't actually murder me."

"I won't if you give me another kiss~"

Yuu huffed, their palm cradling Floyd’s face as they pulled him in, “You’re insufferable.”

And that was how they got there. Floyd’s lips were still insistent against theirs, albeit softer and gentler than before. He seemed to be intent on prying sigh after sigh from their lungs, clever lips smirking against their own. Thinking about it now, it wasn’t such a bad place to be, if only Floyd would shut up with his comments.

“Are we dating now?” Floyd murmured.

“We haven’t even gone on a date yet?” Yuu raised a brow as Floyd pressed his fingers against their neck for the nth time. “Wait— you like me?”

“Shrimpy, you’re playing with me,” Floyd’s giggles echoed against the walls. “'Course I do. Don’t you like me too? Isn’t that why you kissed me again?” Well. He got them there. Maybe it really was their petty pride that was getting in the way of them realizing the kind-of-massive crush they had on the other, with the way their cheeks felt hot at the insinuation.

“See~ You do~” Floyd’s smile was sharp before it was soft, but they couldn’t help but avoid his gaze. “And for the date, let’s go now.”

Now that got their attention, “Floyd, it’s probably 3am.”

“We’ll go to McDonald’s,” Floyd announced resolutely, and Yuu would’ve found it funny if they didn’t find it utterly ridiculous.

“You can’t just—” It was with that opportune timing that they caught a glimpse of themself in the mirror. “Floyd Leech. Did you give me a fucking hickey?” 

"Hmm?" Floyd met their gaze, grinning coyly. "But it seemed like you enjoyed it. And it looks good on you, Shrimpy."

They held in the scream threatening. to bubble up their throat, “That was why Deuce was— Oh, I’m never going to live this down.”

“What about McDonald’s though?” Floyd asked, all while they were having a stage three mental breakdown over the fact that one of their best friends had not only caught them making out with someone but with a hickey on their neck. Not to mention the jacket, it must've looked like they—

“Forget about McDonald’s, I’m going to die out of shame right here,” Yuu muttered, sliding down the wall slowly. Floyd must’ve found that amusing, because with the strength only an eelmer could muster, he hoisted them into his arms.

“You can’t die on me now. I’ll treat you to McDonald’s and you’ll be alright,” Floyd said cheerily, as if an oreo McFlurry could somehow magically fix Yuu’s reputation with their friends.

They clutched at his shoulder, “Nothing you can say will make any of this better.” 

“Really?” Floyd stopped, halfway through unlocking the door. “Y’know, earlier, I was staring at you, right? It was because you looked too good in my jacket. ‘S like it was made for you, or something?”

Whoever made Floyd Leech this flirty should really go to hell.

They delivered a swift palm to Floyd’s chin, hiding their face, “O-okay, I got it. You win. Let’s just go to McDonalds.” And there was this very satisfied look on Floyd’s face; the very definition of a cat that had gotten the cream all for himself. The exact smug look that they had been dreading to see. But well…it didn’t really feel too bad to be on the receiving end of it. Especially not when Floyd started humming happily under his breath.

Not exactly where they thought they would be by the end of the night, but if a trip to McDonald’s at 3am after a party was what a relationship with Floyd would be like, then they probably wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. Except maybe their reputation back. (Okay, that last part was definitely lie.)

thank you for reading this college au fic ! tbh i had a lot of fun writing a more expressive yuu ++ frat boy! floyd's shenanigans >:D if you'd like to read more of my stuff, come check out my masterlist <3

[wonusite]

hey bestie, it's been a while. i hope your doing well and staying healthy. i miss you and i'm also excited for your upcoming fics. here's a wonwoo concept i suddenly think of when i watch a clip of an e-sports drama.

journalist!reader needs to interview e-sports player!wonwoo for her article about their university's e-sports club. but how did she ended up cockwarming him during the interview while he is practicing for a match? then she's whimpering his name everytime wonwoo bucked his hips up whenever the match goes intense, making the tip of his huge cock hitting her cervix. wonwoo eventually taking her to his bed to fuck her properly, telling her that she's his lucky charm he won the match while burying his cock even depeer in her tight cunt. filling her up with his huge load of cum as her prize for being his good girl.

-tulip🌷

hey, bb! i’ve missed you too and i hope this year has been treating u well so far! 🤍 ur really too sweet and i hope you like what is to come 🫰🏼

AND SHNSNSJBS STOP THIS IS A TOP TIER CONCEPT AND U KNOW I HAVE TO ELABORATE!!!

so wonwoo isn’t really keen on doing interviews bc he likes to lay low and go unnoticed, but when he sees a picture of who’s going to interview him (you), he’s absolutely done for and immediately agrees to do the interview.

so cut to where he insists that you meet him at his place for the interview and ur kind of like wtf? bc all the interviews you do are usually in a public setting. you only agree bc lowkey being alone w such a hot guy excites you. the interview goes smoothly until you get to the part where you ask about the calm disposition he always displays.

“people say nothing is capable of making you lose your cool during a match. would you agree?”

he gets a cocky smirk on his face. “yeah. in fact, i’ll prove it to you.”

you’re not really sure how or why you easily agreed to cockwarm him, but you’d like to think this is all for your article—in the name of professionalism, if you will. and damn it, if wonwoo isn’t proving what everyone says to be right. you’ve clenched down on him several times but all he does is bite his lip and smirk. not even when he’s close to losing does he show any visible reaction.

well, that’s not exactly right. he does buck his hips up into you, but you’re pretty sure he does it bc u whine and whimper into his neck every time his cock hits your sweet spot.

you find that wonwoo is very strict, skillfully swatting your thigh or ass every time you try to fuck urself on his cock. he tells you to be patient and at the end of his match, you’ll get rewarded. all you can do is pout and mewl into his neck. at least he lets u kiss and suck on his neck tho.

once he’s finished with possibly one of the best practices he’s ever had, he grips your hips and starts to fuck up into you roughly and harshly. all you can do is moan his name as his big cock fills you and hits the spongy spot inside you. all wonwoo is doing is telling you how you’re his lucky charm and how much of a good girl u r for staying still the entire time he was practicing. ofc you come and cream all over his cock at the words.

this triggers wonwoo’s own orgasm. he groans your name as his hot cum completely fills you. then this menace of a man surprises you by lifting you up and walking you over to his bed, using his cock to keep you plugged up w his cum the entire time. once he has you laid on his bed, he pulls out, groaning lowly when he sees your pretty pussy leaking with his essence.

wonwoo gently thumbs at ur messy cunt, smirking when you whimper his name. “don’t think we’re done yet, baby. i still have to reward you for being such a good girl.”

[gritsandbrits]

Why I hate Carlie Cooper (Spider-Man Rant)

So I've been going around sites such as CBR, Reddit, Tumblr and Deviantart to see what people's opinions were on Carlie Cooper, and the results were mixed at best. As many other fans of the webcrawling hoodlum, I have my share of gripes with her character and this chapter explains why Carlie is the absolute worst Spider Man love interest.

Sour Introduction

Carlie was introduced too soon and too quickly, just after OMD. The travesty already left a sour taste in our mouthes, but when she was introduced showing Mary Jane the door, this scene not only spat in the face of MJ fans and Pete x MJ shippers, but also made the rest of us go, "QUESADA!!!" This made the replacement girlfriend thing very obvious. Marvel made it clear that MJ is gone and Carlie was here to stay.

Notable character traits were ripped off from other love interests

Many readers caught on that the core traits Carlie displayed in her time in the comics were established within previous love interests. Keep in mind, two characters sharing similar attributes isn't wrong. My own OC, Lucy, shares Urusla Ditkovich's love of baking and apparent shyness, and having powers like Sophia Sanduval, but other than that she is nothing like the latter two in terms of personality, looks and personal history. But this is not about my OC.

Carlie has aspects that are blatantly ripped off from other love interests, and they happen to be their good or recognizable traits. This may or may not be intentional on the writers part but merely a product of trying and failing to develop her as a character. Let me run down the list for you.

• Nerdy, adorable and the supposed "regular girl": Debra Whitman

• Dark past involving some serious daddy issues: Mary Jane Watson

They couldn't have given her mommy issues or problems with authority figures in general. To be fair, comic books are drenched with characters with daddy issues. Cyclops is the walking example. 

• Idolized within the comics and sometimes praised as "The One" for Peter: Gwen Stacy

As opposed to in fan's memories, some point out that Gwen Stacy hated Spider Man. That's another sad thing about her death: she died hating the guy she loved.

• Dad was a cop: Gwen

To justify Carlie's relationship with Gwen, they made her dad a cop. Later it was revealed that he wasn't a cop nor a good man for that matter. This goes back to the daddy issues thing as we are supposed to feel bad for her, but it came across as cheap and not genuinely tragic as MJ's abusive past. Also, Carlie has a missing mother like Gwen.

• Served as an informant on the force: Jean DeWolff

Whereas Jean had an interesting dynamic with Spider-Man, Carlie's dynamuc seems forced in, rationalized as sharing his love of science. Everything Carlie does could have easily been solved by Spider Man or any of his allies, even Greer Grant.

• Peter vs Spider-Man conflict: Black Cat

Carlie was briefly torn between Parker and Spider Man after discovering the big secret. It took Felicia decades in real time and a few years in comic book time for her to accept Parker but by then he had already moved on to MJ and BC decided to move on as well.

• Fell in love with Parker persona: Gwen, MJ, Sophia from Marvel Adventures

Gwen hated Spider Man though, but she fell in love with Peter. MJ preferred plain old Peter and accepted Spider Man. Sophia played an active role in both Peter's civilian and superhero lives and used her mutant ability to talk to animals to help.

• Personality included being a tsundere: Gwen, and Michelle Gonzales before she went nuts

• Had an interest in science: Gwen

NOTICING A PATTERN HERE!?

• Friends with Harry: Gwen Stacy (again)

• Was depicted as blonde and began with a minor crush on Parker: GWEN STACY!!!

Wow is it just me or do the writers at Marvel lowkey want to resurrect Gwen Stacy? Damn, just let the lady rest in peace!

• Pushed as Peter's intellectual equal: Debra (give us two points for Debby)

• Supposed to have a fun, sociable personality: MJ

Did I mention that Carlie at one time was depicted with red hair with a very similar hairstyle to MJ? They weren't even trying to be subtle with the replacement thing.

• Loves both Spider Man and Peter: MJ  also an inversion of Black Cat who only really likes Spidey (she was kinda getting along with Peter but that never took off)

• Went from meek and submissive doormat to assertive and optimistic action girl: Betty Brant

• Named after a particular person given the context behind it: Joe Quesada named her after his daughter

From what I heard, Joe's daughter was around three years old when he shat out OMD. That is very creepy, as if he wants his toddler to be with a fictional character that bad.

When Doc Ock impersonated as Peter after his supposed death, Carlie was the only cast member out of the whole Marvel universe to correctly figure out that Doc!Peter was a faker.

Mary Jane and Aunt May were used to villains dressing up as Peter (and even beat up a few of them), but for some odd reason none of them could figure out the Dcotor Octopus was posing as him. 

Depsite MJ being his main love interest and Aunt May having raised him from a kid, they could not have told the real Peter from an impostor.

THE FANTASTIC FOUR AND THE AVENGERS COULDN'T FIGURE IT OUT DEPSITE WORKING WITH PETER FOR YEARS!!!!!

Yet is was the great detective work of Ms. Carlie Cooper that was able to determine that Doctor Octopus was using Peter's body to do some bad things. You know, like a villain.

Speaking of the Doctor, Dan Slott often used him a lot in his stories to the point that fans believe that Doc Ock was becoming a bit of a Villain Sue. And their arguments were sadly proven right later on, but back onto Carlie...

The way she did this was by following Spider Man's money trail to see how he could afford expensive equilment and minions  (excuse me, employees) and it leads right to Doc Ock.

The simple fact that one of Spider Man's smartest foes was stupid enough to not cover his tracks showed that something had to be altered just to make Carlie look good. What was that something? Taking basic common sense out of the Marvel Universe so that Carlie could play Miss Marple!

When Carlie got infected with Goblin Serum and turned into Monster (the lamest villain name since Menace), she was the only person to ever resist its brainwashing effects. She gets some scars around her eyes but is otherwise fully cured and that experience is enough to make her leave the world of Spider Man forever.

In the story arc Spider Island, Carlie broke up with Peter just because he didn't tell her he was Spider Man. Alternatively MJ got closer to Peter, which made fans everywhere sigh with relief. This also proves how very little Carlie seems to care about Peter's side of the story.

Also in Spider Island she used her new powers to play around while MJ used hers to actually help people. When a supermodel is better at heroics than a police officer/forensic scientist, then you know something is wrong.

Mary Jane stayed with Peter when she found out, in fact she already knew it was him but didn't confront him because she didn't think of herself as a good confidante and feared Peter would lie to her but she understood why.

It was implied in the comics and stated by old writers that, had Gwen not been killed off she would have eventually found out about Peter being Spider man and stayed with him; they would have even gotten married.

Carlie managed to pop up in other Marvel titles such as The Punisher even though she was irrelevant to the plot, and the writers claim that she was "the sanest member of the cast." This was after her irresponsible antics during Spider Island.

Character shilling when not appropriate

One of Carlie's major problems was how she was pushed as being perfect for Peter without getting to know him. It became even more egregious when other characters started pushing Carlie as perfect, such as Auny May and Harry Osborn.

Mary Jane told Peter that he needed to hook up with Carlie, which was awkward coming from a woman who was married to him for twenty years.

Peter himself couldn't stop gushing over how perfect Carlie was for him, and he spent a lot of time in angst over how undeserving he was of their lust - I mean love.

Everyone, from Harry Osborn to Black Cat said that Carlie was perfect for Peter. I get Harry because he was friends with her, but Black Cat???? The real clencher was that Felicia didn't even know who Carlie was at the time.

No wonder she turned crazy at the end.

SPEAKING OF CRAZY!

Characters personalities were changed in order to make Carlie a total saint

For example, Michelle Gonzales (another hated Spidey Love Interest) used to be a regular old tsundere. Sure she had problems of her own as a character, but once Carlie was introduced her aggressive trait was exaggerated to violent extremes and Michelle begins abusing Peter. If that's not enough she eventually gets RAPED by the Chameleon of all people. The same Chameleon who got his ass beat by Mary Jane and verbally pawned by Aunt May for impersonating Peter.

No matter how Marvel tried to say it, no matter how bitchy she was, Michelle got raped and Chameleon got off scot-free.

I mean he didn't force himself on her just shapeshifted as Peter and had sex with her. Apparently shapeshifters can't be charged with rape as long as it's consensual.

In The Many Loves of Spider Man, Gwen Stacy was presented as a worry wart which goes against her original characterization as a proto-Tsundere. Carlie was presented as a gutsy young girl, which made her look smarter than the supposed science girl Gwen was.

Gets mad at Peter for the dumbest reasons

When Peter had to go on a mission for the Future Foundation (aka the Fantastic Four), he told Carlie that he was going out of town for Horizon Labs, the place he had worked for before becoming Tony Stank 2.0.

Naturally, Carlie found out that Peter had lied to her and during one of her roller derby competitions, ends up beating up a rival skater so badly that she was suspended for the rest kf the game.  Afterwards, her team took her out for a drink to calm her down and she gets drunk and goes to a tattoo parlor.

Deciding to get back at Peter, she decided to get an Osborn tattoo, more specifically a Green Goblin.

This was the man that murdered her childhood friend, Peter's first girlfriend and first true love (and to some fans his only true love).

This was the man that ended the Silver Age of Comic Books.

This was the man who killed innocent people just to get what he want.

This was the man who subjected his son and other people to so much pain, misery and sorrow because of his actions, some of which he still had yet to answer for.

But yet.....

You decide to get a tramp stamp of Green Goblin all to spite Peter because he lied to keep you separate from his superhero life?

I'm surprised that everyone who ever did a rant on Carlie never brought this part up. This woman would go as far as to taint her own friend's memory by getting a tattoo of her killer, all just to spite a guy she barely knew for not even a year. And this guy loved her friend.

When Peter finally told Carlie the truth, she broke up with him in yhe most melodramatic way possible. She claimed that his life was a lie and that his Parker persona was "just a suit."

She was also upset that Mary Jane knew about it, even though MJ and Peter were friends far longer than she knew Peter, and he trusted MJ with that secret. Eventually, Carlie accepts the Spidey persona, leaving her with a good reason to hang out with Mary Jane.

I have problems with the above scene because Peter lied to protect her and to keep her out of a very dangerous lifestyle. Yet, she does not want to hear his side of the story and the writers fail to persuade the readers to sympathize with her. This scene also shows that she is a complete and utter hypocrite. She can keep secrets like the identity of the new Wraith (and unlike Vin and Ray she doesn't turn the new Wraith over to the police), yet Peter cannot lie to her for very good reasons.

Featured on "Many Loves of Spider Man" - when Carlie and Peter had not hooked up yet. 

At the time Carlie was still a minor character and not engaged in a romance with Peter. Yet for some odd reason she was featured on the cover with characters people grew up with and came to love.

Carlie was not featured in s single comic yet was immediately pushed as one of Peter's many loves. Debra should have been here, or Betty since she was his very first girlfriend. And how come it's called Many when the cover only has four? 🤔

Closing Statements

The positives of Carlie is that she was shown a lot more capable of handling herself in dangerous situations than MJ and Gwen, and even willing to pick up a gun. But MJ was never a traditional damsel in distress; the lady took boxing lessons from Captain America for God's Sake! OG Gwen was never a fighter in the first place and to be honest, she was supposed to be a tsundere. She had a personality, and no matter how people say that Gwen was a boring character who deserved to be killed off, she wasn't in need of no saving while she was alive.

Okay except for that one time.

Others say that Carlie was being unfairly judged because she wasn't like Mary Jane. In contrast, Sophia Sanduval wasn't like Mary Jane and people love her (assuming they know who she is). Sophia is regarded to be one of the best Spider Man love interests. Ursula wasn't Mary Jane and people love her; fans who watched the original trilogy preferred a Peter x Ursula romance because MJ was that bad. There are even people who watched Ultimate Spider Man that started to ship Aya with Peter based on a few ship tease scenes, and she wasn't MJ.

On Quotev, AO3 and right here on Wattpad, you have dozens if not hundreds of Peter Parker x OC fanfictions, many that are amazing and written by pretty talented people. OCs aren't canon in the first place, but the OCs I'd seen (talking about the well-defined ones here) aren't MJ and I have not seen one negative comment about OCs or their creators. In fact people love them because they demonstrate how you can have a unique and relatable love interest without copying canon characters.

Final Statements

Overall, the problems Carlie have are she has inconsistent characterization, tries so hard to be the Perfect Girl for Peter, and she is irrelevant to the plot. If you take away her core traits she just ends up being a flat, boring character.

In conclusion, Carlie is a textbook case of Relationship and Black Hole Sue, and should be used as an example of what not to do when creating love interests. The key is to develop a character over time and not spending so much on making her (or him if any of you prefer same-sex pairings) the perfect girl/man/whatever for Peter or whatever random character you plan on shipping with.

Anyways, that's all I have to say about Carlie. Yeah it was a lot of words but I wanted to show and tell why so many Spider Man fans do not like her. It's not that she replaced Mary Jane, it's because she tried way to hard to be so many different characters and her general unlikable attitude and the subtext behind her whole creation.

Thanks for whoever took the time to read this mess of a rant.