#he literally just showed up with a child at lestats door and was like if you dont turn her I’ll divergent you right now 🥺

[pinimi]

cannot BELIEVE that they made Louis the one to babytrap Lestat instead

[ca-suffit]

warning for potential book/future show spoilers idk??

so based on what sam said in this new interview, it seems like they’re kinda going down the route of lestat being unable to control his violent tendencies because a lot of his rage comes from having akasha’s blood in him. i think he called it like a “monstrous source” of his rage/violence and said they even cut lines alluding to it in the drop scene. i haven’t read the books and was wondering if you had any thoughts. i’ve never seen any theories about it but i’m kind of wondering whether that’s what a s3 revisit of the 1x05 fight would explore. if it turns out the lestat physically couldn’t control himself then that seems to absolve him a bit and idk if the show would do that? especially after his apology monologue in the new ep. or maybe it’s less literal like just bc he struggled with self control doesn’t mean he wasn’t ultimately able to and chose not to anyway. idk if this makes sense, i was actually surprised sam talked about this as it seems a bit spoilery and it feels like potentially a big twist about lestat’s perspective on things.

I won't spell out the spoilers here (to be considerate to everyone) but I do know what he's talking about and it's a couple of things. u must have the gatekeeping book ppl blocked bcuz they've been talking about this and are doing it again rn lol. half of it is bcuz they are already heavily leaning into fully excusing him still. bcuz of courseeeee they are!!!! I need a bingo card for this shit. but anyway.

I feel p confident the show is not going to excuse anything. they've already been confirming what happened and u can't rly walk that back. did they give louis an excuse when his vampiric powers made him kick the whole door in on his family's house? even if lestat wants to say he felt something was out of control inside of him, they were basically married and living together with a child for however many years by that point. that's something u can confide to ur spouse by then if ur trying to do anything "right." u don't sit on it for decades and not let anyone know. the lestans will use any excuse forever if they want to, but even if u took that route of saying he wasn't able to control something, he should have communicated that before this point. it changes nothing. we saw how louis struggled to explain why he didn't know about the cloud gift until that moment in S1.

I was a little surprised he talked about it too but....these were sort of his theories, mainly? he doesn't know what they're going to write and who knows if these were his own headcanons or real shit they've talked about exploring on the show (I don't remember all his exact phrasing now). I wouldn't worry about the show excusing him tho, I don't think that's going to happen. There might be a discussion him and Louis have later, in reflection, but there's nothing that can just fully excuse that drop for any reason. and they've already owned up to it in canon.

[complicitsacrilege]

1, 2, 3, 7, 16 for the ask game. Armand 👀

Thanks so much for the ask!!!

Going only on the book canon bc honestly the writing of S2 just killed show Armand (and honestly the rest of the show after season 1) for me.

1. Why do you like or dislike this character? I love Armand because he’s the character I related to the most growing up. I cannot tell you how many times I read TVA. Lestat was a close second but TVA is how I processed my own trauma (along with a few other books). I love most of the vampire chronicles characters and picking between Armand and Lestat for my favorite is like picking a favorite child but Armand comes out on top by just a bit. Armand was the first character I ever read about that has trauma similar to my own, and that was the first time I felt fully seen in any character. Others like Lestat definitely also did make me feel that way in a sense, but Armand hit a bit closer to home for me.

2. Favorite canon thing about this character? He’s a survivor. Come hell or high water, he’s going to figure out how to survive whatever shit is going on. He may not make good decisions, but he’s got the spirit anyway.

3. Least favorite canon thing about this character? The whole Denis situation 💀 don’t like that.

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like? Oof the way the fandom makes him this waifish little baby twink with no agency. DUDE WAS A WHOLE ENTIRE CULT LEADER FOR 200 YEARS. HE ALSO CHOPPED DOWN A DOOR FOR SOME DICK. — And of course he has committed atrocities and LIKED it. He didn’t necessarily choose the cult life but he stayed in it long after he needed to. Not only that, but he’s spent 500 years either surviving traumas beyond what most people can even imagine or struggling to learn how to be a person. He has MAYBE 20 good years before he meets Daniel (don’t even get me started on Devil’s Minion I could write a whole dissertation). The years he spent with his family (as far as we know), and the years he spent with Marius. He’s scrappy, he enjoys murder (he literally states this on a few different occasions - notably in the PL trilogy, in which he quite enjoys killing rogue fledglings because it’s fun), he tortures others, BUT he doesn’t know how to be a person. That is at the crux of his character. That’s his entire motive for everything. He has no fucking clue how to just be a person. He’s a cult leader, he’s a devotee in a monastery, he’s a student, he’s this, that, the other thing. He doesn’t know how to just be. So, he commits atrocities because what else is there to do? 🤷

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character? I am 100% and Armand, Daniel, Marius truther after BC. I love the trio so much and feel like they’d balance each other so well, but alas, Anne seems to have forgotten Daniel’s existence by the end 🥹

[nileqt87]

Ramblings about Lucifer referencing Bones, “Close your eyes.” and shows influencing each other

That was never just a Bones reference being made and the season finale admitted it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jv_1dJk5yEM

David Boreanaz played the ironically-named Angel on Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel: the Series. His character has *so many* parallels with Lucifer (far more than Booth outside of the law enforcement/crime procedural connection).

Angel's spinoff also has noir crime drama aspects mixed with the supernatural starring an immortal protagonist with a dark past and infamously villainous reputation fighting evil as a supernatural private detective in the City of Angels (a city known for its dark underbelly juxtaposed with fame and glamor, broken dreams and chasing eternal youth) and navigating human law (including the LAPD and evil lawyers) while not legally existing.

Angel also fell in love with a blonde human heroine (Buffy Summers) after lifetimes of self-destructive, not-so-heroic behaviors (getting his soul back did *not* make Angel a hero and human Liam was a lecherous drunk with unfulfilled ambitions and father issues) who inspired him to become a better man and make human connections.

AtS made heavy use of sprawling nighttime Downtown L.A. cityscape shots, which Lucifer also shared an abundance of.

During both of their first cases, they failed to save the troubled blonde girl they were trying to help (Tina and Delilah, respectively). They also have a connection inside the LAPD through a blonde cop who also takes their identity secrets pretty badly (Kate Lockley in Angel's case).

Note that Buffy not only screamed (twice, given it repeated during her memory loss in Halloween), but also came after Angel with a crossbow when she thought he'd attacked her mother (it was Darla), so Chloe taking the Devil face reveal (Monster Reveals are iconic old horror imagery) poorly to the point of considering poisoning is par for the course. However, it only took Buffy seven episodes instead of three seasons to get the identity reveal via seeing the horrific second face (arguably also an accident on Angel's part).

They are metaphorically or literally Hell's angels. They also had long stays in Hell or a hell dimension.

Lucifer and Angel are also both Prodigal Sons with long-held grudges against their long-absent fathers (patricide in Liam/Angel(us)'s case) and they're later faced with a situation where they have unexpected, thought-impossible offspring who show up as adults (neither got to raise their miracle child) wanting revenge. Yup, major Connor/Rory parallel there.

Angel is also in a constant struggle with the Powers that Be manipulating his fate and free will (like Lucifer, he's a champion of free will no matter the cost) and making him prophecy's bitch.

Bones famously got jokes about how Booth is Angel getting his Shanshu (made human), since the character is given constant Angel-isms like references to a dark past having killed people (Booth is also named after a historical murderer, in addition to having been a sniper), both being Catholics full of Catholic guilt (note that the Buffyverse is most accurately polytheistic, though Angel does face off against a take on the antichrist--Angel has constant biblical imagery/themes and not just because of vampire iconography), kicking down doors (just not off their entire frames--LOL), turning on a dime and threatening people up against walls, constant wink-wink references to the Buffyverse (familiar casting, references to the Hyperion Hotel, etc...), etc...

The Lucifer finale used the words "Close your eyes." right before Lucifer is sent to Hell. This is literally the BtVS season 2 finale where Buffy kisses Angel and sends him to hell for a century with a stab to the gut (see the season 5 finale, not to mention Lucifer giving up his life for Chloe's à la I Will Remember You).

Note that D.B. Woodside was on BtVS (playing Robin Wood, whose Slayer mother Nikki Wood was killed by Spike). Aimee Garcia was in both episodes of AtS (Birthday--she's older than she looks!) and Bones. See her also playing a cross-wearing religious girl on Supernatural who was slaughtered in a police precinct by Lilith. Kevin Alejandro was also in an episode of Bones.

Tricia Helfer was in an episode of Supernatural playing a ghost who reenacts the night of her death every year. BtVS also had an episode along those lines, but with Buffy and Angelus possessed (not to mention Phantom Dennis!). Lucifer having Dan as a ghost is yet another thing they all have in common (ditto referencing Ghost, Patrick Swayze and/or Unchained Melody--Vincent Schiavelli a.k.a. Ghost's subway ghost was Jenny's uncle Enyos, whom Angelus killed).

Lucifer name-checked Castiel and Supernatural referenced Lucifer using their Lucifer (crime-fighting angel in L.A. made it a double-reference whammy). Supernatural returned the favor again by having Castiel forced to sing in Enochian. Lucifer's reference to his singing voice was already a zing about Misha Collins having to put on that monotone gravel voice and Enochian being far from melodious.

Russell T Davies was quite heavily inspired by the Buffyverse when he revived Doctor Who and spun off Torchwood, so there are absolute tons of Buffy, Angel and Spike respectively in Rose Tyler, the 9th/10th Doctors, Captain Jack Harkness and Captain John Hart (right down to the actor). School Reunion is the episode where the Buffyverse inspiration is most on the nose, complete with Anthony Stewart Head saying "shooty dog thing" in a school setting and a Mayor/Angel-esque speech about the curse of immortality. The Time War gave the Doctor a huge genocide-level guilt complex. Note that the creator of DC comics' version of Lucifer, Neil Gaiman, has also written for Doctor Who and is also the co-creator of Good Omens (the show is brimming with Doctor Who Easter eggs thanks to David Tennant). A barely-recognizable Tom Ellis played Martha Jones' ex-fiancé Tom Milligan during the Year that Never Was, as well.

A lot of shows take inspiration from the Buffyverse and you've probably seen some of them. It isn't just the copycat vampire romance stories either.

Angel's forerunners in turn were a mix of guilt-stricken, rat-eating Louis de Pointe du Lac (his Jekyll/Hyde-esque alter-ego Angelus is closer to the pre-retcon, fully-evil Lestat de Lioncourt, who got woobified into an antihero rocker not unlike Spike--the entire Fanged Four mirror Anne Rice's character lineup), sword-wielding, immortality trope-influencers Connor/Duncan MacLeod of Highlander fighting for the Prize of humanity (akin to Pinocchio becoming a "real boy"--see also Barnabas Collins of Dark Shadows, though he was before vampires became antihero superheroes, not just sympathetic antivillains) and Nick Knight of Forever Knight (vampire detective).

Additionally, Tom Welling was famously the longest-serving Clark Kent of them all (Smallville) on the old WB (there's that DC comics connection, too), so it's not just a Fox shows thing (though Fox, not just Warner Brothers, did indeed own the Buffyverse). One of the least-known things about Clark is that he also has an immortality problem where he wouldn't age parallel to Lois (they wouldn't be able to have kids either) without a workaround. The Kryptonite line directed at Cain/Pierce by Lucifer was quite on the nose! Lucifer and Smallville sort of crossed over even further in Crisis on Infinite Earths, so Tom is canonically the face of both Clark and Cain in parallel universes of the DC multiverse.

Supernatural had quite recently had their own takes on Cain (played by Timothy Omundson, who also played God Johnson) and the Mark of Cain when Lucifer did it. Dan's killer Le Mec was, of course, Rob Benedict, who was God a.k.a. Chuck Shurley, the ultimate villain of Supernatural. Richard Speight, Jr., who was archangel Gabriel/Loki the Trickster, directed a lot of Lucifer's later episodes in addition to being a prolific Supernatural director.

Supernatural and Lucifer use the exact same font for their titles (Supernatural Knight).

The X-Files (which Supernatural referenced constantly) and Supernatural also had stories about nephilim (see the apocryphal Book of Enoch). Lucifer ultimately had two nephilim (forbidden interspecies offspring of angels and humans), even if not saying so as a known concept. Connor can also be compared to the vampire equivalent of being something like a dhampir, though he's not quite that (mostly-but-not-quite-human offspring of two vampires instead of a human/vampire hybrid--see Blade for an actual dhampir). Supernatural has also covered the even rarer cambion species (human/demon hybrid).

[thenightling]

My horror dislikes list

I love horror, particularly Gothic Horror as a genre. However there are certain common types of horror or sub-genres of horror I don’t really care for.  Just because I don’t like it, it doesn’t mean I don’t understand it or can’t appreciate that others might like it.    This is just my personal opinion and I mean no offense to anyone.  And some of what I may list will be controversial to some.   Bear that in mind.  Horror that I don't care for:

1.  This one is probably the most controversial so I’ll list it first. 

Most controversial:  H. P. Lovecraft.   It's not that he is "too wordy" or "long winded." (Never insult me like that.)  It's not that I "don't get it."  It’s not that he uses “archaic language.”  (These are real things people have assumed when I tell them I don’t like Lovecraft).  I just feel he's overrated.  I don't like his antisemitism, which was considered extreme by 1930s American standards.  And I don't like how he's credited with creating certain concepts that weren't really his doing.  His ideas about long sleeping ancient / forgotten Gods or Old Ones can be found as early as Goethe's Faust Part 2, if not earlier.   Other authors that had similar ideas before Lovecraft include George MacDonald, author of Lilith.     Sometimes I like when other people adapt Lovecraft.  I liked Neil Gaiman’s A Study in Emerald.  I liked the origin of Morpheus’ helm in Sandman: Overture (also Neil Gaiman).  I liked the two episodes of The Real Ghostbusters animated series inspired by Lovecraft.  I even like the spoof Lil Cthulhu.  But I’m just not a big fan of actual H. P. Lovecraft. This doesn’t mean I haven’t read it.  Nor does it mean I don’t understand it.  And I do appreciate his influence on pop culture.  I just feel he’s overrated.       2.  I don't like Rob Zombie movies.  It's all the same to me.  Boring, grimy, sweaty, eldgelordy- full of overused modern tropes like flickering lights, jump scares, and "I haven't showered in a month" antagonists.  He sucked the supernatural out of Halloween and there's nothing truly distinct about any of his films.  It's just a style that doesn't appeal to me. 3.   CG.  I love practical effects.  Most CG is lazy, cartoonish, and doesn't look like it's really there.  I know it can look realistic and gorgeous at time but most horror films don’t take that route.  Most horror directors use it lazily. There’s a Night of the Living dead 4 or 5 by the Syfy Channel where a manhole cover is clearly CG.  Why did a manhole cover have to be CG?!  And there’s CG blood in Spartacus: Blood and Sand, which is very distracting because it looks like jello flying at the camera.  The werewolves in An American werewolf in Paris are already dated and very fake looking yet the transformation in An American Werewolf in London still gets to people today.  The werewolves in An American werewolf in Paris didn't even look real by 90s standards.  They looked like beasts that escaped Who Framed Roger Rabbit.   In the Fright Night remake there's a scene where a windshield shatters in front of Amy's face and she screams on que but she doesn't flinch or blink, making it very clear the glass isn't really there.  Had it been sugar glass or ice to give the effect, there would have been a natural flinch.  I feel practical effects, if you can't guess how it was done, can be more unnerving and the reactions seem more real.  That's why some 80s fantasy is more unnerving for kids than some modern horror.    4.  Jump scares.  Jump scares are lazy.  Being startled is not the same as being afraid.  And when they add a musical chord to accompany the scare it's like idiot proofing ot say "This is where you should react."   The only jump scare that ever worked on me was when I was twelve-years-old watching Interview with the vampire.  Louis says "It's the carriage." and he goes down to the door. And you know damn good and well it's not the carriage.  He opens the door, there's no one there.   You know it's coming, but when he turns his head and Lestat's hand grabs his throat, I jumped the first time I saw that.  I knew it was coming.  But I still jumped.   To me a good scare is when it creeps in and crawls under your skin. When I was watching Let the Right One In I remembered thinking “Ah, this isn’t so scary.” and it was at the part where Eli climbs up the side of the hospital.  It was snowy outside, just as it was in the movie, and late at night.  And at that moment the power went out. For a split second (It was only a second) I thought “Oh, crap!  Vampire child’s gonna get me!”   And I was a grown woman in 2008.  I was twenty-six-years-old. Another incident that made me realize just how scary Gothic horror truly is was when I was watching a History Channel show about the real Castle Dracula.  And it mentioned the locals seeing mysterious lights and noises up in the castle so some priests were sent to bless the place.  A storm came in suddenly and the priests had to do the blessing from a distance.  (This was Poenari castle, not Bran.  Bran is used for tourists.  Poenari is where Vlad spent most of his time but it’s considered unsafe).  And as I watched this I remembered that storm summoning was supposed to be one of the vampire Dracula’s powers. At that moment the door creaked open And I practically leapt out of my skin.   That’s when I knew Dracula is actually scary.

I also had a nightmare once about being a werewolf in the style of The wolfman. In the dream I blacked out during the transformation and then suddenly it was hours or a day later and I knew I must have done something terrible and I found loved ones slaughtered.   I remember the guilt in that dream and I knew The Wolfman had reached me on a level most horror doesn’t, on a fear of what it must be like to be like him.           My most recent experience with a truly good sense of my skin crawling horror was watching an episode of DC Universe's Swamp Thing. A child is possessed with the ghost of Abby Arcane's dead childhood friend.   She's been singing their old song and acting ...well, weird.   "If you're her than prove it?"  She is smiling menacingly.  It looks like she'll do nothing.  Abby turns to walk away.  This is where most jump scares happen.  But it doesn't.  As she nears the door it slams shut but that isn't the end of it.  It's not just a stupid psych out jump scare the way most horror movies do now.  Instead the whole atmosphere of the room changes.  Everything becomes damp.  The lighting dims.   Everything becomes slightly off-kilter or "wrong" like in a nightmare.  It was so atmospheric, so spooky... It was the best Gothic horror moment I had seen in literally years.  I had goosebumps.  5.   The polarization of vampire fiction triggered by the Twilight fad.  Thankfully this is dying now.   But for a while vampires were divided into two styles.  The broody, whiny emo, or the mindless killing machine AKA "the Shark with legs."   I missed the balance of charming and charismatic, but also predatory.  I missed the likes of Frank Langella as Dracula and Chris Sarandon as Jerry Dandridge. The Fright Night remake was disappointing for this reason.  I hate that vampires rarely shapeshift now.  I hate the nerfing of their powers.   And I hate that Jerry's human-side was erased as a reactionary response to be anti-Twilight.   It ruined the remake for me.  6.   Ghosts that movie like a broken VHS tape.  The jerking movement ghosts of ghosts that suddenly flicker or spasm and suddenly are a few stepped forward without actually moving...  This works in Ringu / The Ring because she IS a damaged VHS tape but in other ghost stories it doesn't really work for me.  it takes me out of the story and I notice it's following a trend. 7.    Torture porn.   Pity, and gross-out is not fear.  It's like how that game show / reality show  "Fear Factor" confused fear with disgust. "eat these random cow pies" isn't fear, folks.   Actually Torture porn kind of bores me . I don't feel fear.  It's just drawn out mutilation and torture.  I may feel pity for the character or be disgusted by the graphic mutilations but I'm not afraid of it.  And it's lazy and cheap.  8.   Next on Lazy and cheap...  Found footage.  I HATE found footage movies.   Shaky cam and screams into a camera don't do it for me.  And they all feel the same.    9.   Most Zombie Apocalypse movies.  Most recent Zombie apocalypse movies bore me.    There are a few exceptions like the original Night of the Living Dead, which, at the time it was made was unique and atmospheric but many zombie films attempt to imitate it and it becomes bland and formulaic.   I also liked Return of the Living Dead because it was one of the first Zombie Apocalypse movies.  It hadn’t yet become dull and predictable to me that everyone huddles together and it becomes more and more futile until there is no one left or it’s utterly hopeless.  And so as things became repetitive I started to dislike the ‘zombie apocalypse genre.”   Exceptions include Night of the Living Dead and Return of the Living Dead.  I also like the original White Zombie and I walked with a Zombie but those are pre-Zombie Apocalypse.   There are a few zombie films I like that aren’t that scary but I like them because they are different.  Those include “My boyfriend’s back.”  (Daddy, I love him!”  “He’s a zombie, you freakin’ idiot!”  I love that line).    And Warm Bodies.   And please don’t use Warm Bodies to discredit my status as a horror fan.  I just like it because it’s different.  First, R isn’t that bad of a protagonist.  He’s more well developed than Edward Cullen and he spends half the movie eating the brains of the dead boyfriend of the girl he’s pining for, carrying bits of brain in his pocket.  There’s no sugar coating that.   Also it’s one of the few zombie apocalypse movies to have a happy ending.  Yeah, it’s sappy and a bit hamhanded bu tit has a sweet message.  Sometimes it’s okay to like sweet.

 10.   Remakes that suck the supernatural out of a supernatural story.  I’m tired of gritty.  I’m tired of “grounded in reality.”  The supernatural is scary because it is unknown.  In the case of Child’s Play, a hacked AI doesn’t seem as creepy to me as a soul of a serial killer seeking a new host body. Also the cynical part of me suspects the “grounding in reality” is a direct ploy to get a release in China, which does not like supernatural content in American import movies. This is part of why Disney / Marvel has been downplaying Marvel’s supernatural side.  I miss supernatural horror.   I’m tired of remakes literally sucking out the soul.  

11. Bonus: Anything based on a “true case” by The Warrens.  I believe in the paranormal.   I respect paranormal research but The Warrens were known con artists, even among paranormal researchers.   If you look at most of their haunted house cases there’s a particular formula.  Woman moves into dream home with loving, Catholic family. Weird things slowly start to happen. The husband is skeptical / getting possessed.  The wife goes to the church for help.  The priests can’t help or nothing happens in front of them.   Desperate she attends a Warrens lecture.  Never fear, The Warrens are here!  And lo’ and behold, the house is full of demons!  Demons only The Warrens know how to Handle.  This happens in The Haunted (Not to be confused with The Haunting), it happens in Gave Secrets: the story of Black Hope Cemetery and pretty much every other haunted house story they got involved in.   They made book and TV movie deals and later bigger Hollywood movie deals.  Now half the horror and Parapsychology world thinks they were demonology heroes and not the con artists who once ‘exorcised a werewolf” (Look it up.)  I am not a fan of The Warrens.

[pharaohsparklefists]

Episode 104, part 1: hey guess what the lawyer’s ~theme~ is!

The administrator’s theme was quotes from historical figures on the topic of battle strategies. 

The personnel manager’s theme was penguins, misogyny,  ecological stewardship, broadway musicals, and penguins.

So logically, the lawyer’s theme is ... law.

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

Noah’s like, “lol, looks like none of you losers will be leaving here with a slightly-used second-hand human body!” And one of the Big Five loyally goes,

and asks to be give a chance, confident, as all mid-tier villains are, that he can succeed where his comrades have inevitably failed.

Meanwhile, in some mansion, Jounouchi decides it’s time for action!

A person can be lazy, or they can be kicking. It’s the dichotomy of man.

Amazingly, he actually KICKS A HOLE IN THE WALL and behind the wall, there’s an astonishingly conveniently placed door

... you’re an underprivileged teenage boy committing property damage, Jounouchi. YOU’RE suspicious.

Behind the door?

Ohhh! He actually says “lucky!” in English, which is pretty adorbs. And funny, since Jounouchi canonically does not speak English. Guess he thinks it’s cool. #reverseweeb

He hopes he’ll find the others back on the Battle Ship and Kaiba uncharacteristically waiting for him before they take off, but instead, he finds no one but a still-comatose Mai. Or is she?

He’s barely got finished telling her about how he’s totally going to kick Malik’s ass on her behalf (he is not) when she considerately but eerily silently just gets up. 

And inconsiderately and loudly starts speaking in a man’s voice.

This is just, SO unnecessary. The only possible justification is that Mr Lawyer thinks that this’ll rattle Jou and gain him the advantage in the duel. 

Or I guess he just loves dress-up.

Okay so then he turns back into the digital version of himself and I gotta show you this process cause it’s fuuuuuuuuuucked

okay, okay, all good so far

weirdly sort of looks like Yami through the eyes of a very drunk person?

... leaning towards Yami Malik crossed with an alien??

... Lestat???

... oh there you go he’s turned into a coherent-looking adult man this must be -- wait????

you overshot, bro! your shoulders have been over-widenated!!

Jounouchi is, justifiably, extremely pissed off, and, in possibly the most bizarre move so far in a very bizarre episode of one of the more bizarre arcs of a wildly bizarre show, the lawyer

politely offers Jounouchi his business card, as though they’re having a normal introduction. Even weirder? Jounouchi takes it!!

Jou isn’t impressed by this guy and his blatant acts of deception and cruelty

oh sweet summer child!

um, gross.

This guy is a total dick, he asks Jounouchi questions (LIKE A LAWYER??) and mocks his answers, ~politely~ saying that the question must have been too hard for him. Dickwad.

Jounouchi is entirely in the right here, but his INCREDIBLE lack of anything approaching facial control is really undermining his authority.

So, he cuts to the chase

and literally, the guy is like “uh, sure, whatever you like” because THIS IS NOT TRUE. Jounouchi does not have to beat him in a card game in order to escape, or indeed, duel him at all. Jounouchi just assumed that, like all kidnappings ever in this universe, children’s trading card games will play a major role.

So the lawyer zooms them to a new location, and HONEST TO GOD, why they couldn’t just have had Jou find a door that led here, instead of going on the creepy and depressing Mai detour, is COMPLETELY BEYOND MY ABILITY TO KEN

but anyway, here we are

engaging in some weird roleplay with a teenager you just met, I guess