#he still has trust issues but now they're even more well hidden

[confused-stars]

i've already started a Wriothesley Fatui au, but now i kind of want the polar opposite Marechaussee Phantom au where he gets help as a kid and grows up to be a detective instead

[anjelicawrites]

The one looking out for you

Paring: dark!Michael Gavey x fem!reader Synopsis: fill for this ask: “Hii can I request a dark Michael gavey x fem reader smut where they're coworkers and reader don't really know Michael because he works in IT and they only pass each other here and there but Michael is obsess with reader and one day he overhears reader telling a coworker that she's ovulating but her fiancé (who's been cheating on her without her knowledge) is out of town and they've been trying for a baby. Michael digs up dirt on her fiance and leaks the info anonymously and then he "coincidently" finds her crying and kinda drunk and he "comforts" reader”. Warnings: NONCON (reader is drunk while having sex), rape, rape drugs, stalking, obsession, sexist language, fatphobia, pictures and videos taken without reader’s consent, vomiting, alcohol usage, reader being drunk, p in v sex, chocking, titty sucking, fingering, creampie, baby trapping, breeding kink, lactation kink, talk of reader reduced to a basement wife, talk of pregnancy sex. A/N: reader is AFAB but not described. Where needed, she/her pronouns used.

Michael knows how special you are, how gentle you heart is; he sees you in all the ways other people don’t. Some might call his behavior obsessive, stalkerish even, but the world doesn’t understand that, when you finally find your person, you need to take all the necessary steps to keep that person safe. Take today, for example. You had worked overtime, your team leader needing your expertise for the latest company project, and are going home just now, after 9 pm on a cold winter night. You should wait for the bus, or hail a cab, but you’re too tired to wait and just want to go home thus cutting through the city park. Michael knows because he’s following the GPS of your phone, to make sure nothing happens to you, and is using the speakers of your phone to hear what’s happening around you and call the cops if someone tries to approach you.

He shouldn’t have cloned your phone, he knows it’s frowned upon, but you pull shit like this: how is he supposed to keep you safe? You are too gentle, too trusting of the world and in need of a protector, someone who will really look after you, not like your useless fiancé, who doesn’t treat you the way you deserve, nor he loves you, otherwise he wouldn’t be having an affair with the girl living in the next door apartment. The discovery had been casual, the Trojan he used to clone your phone had infected your fiancé’s as well and Michael had been the unwilling witness to his sexual escapades with that whore. He had been so disgusted by the way the asshole talked about you, that he would have disconnected from the phone, if he wasn’t digging for dirt on him.

Michael knows he’s invisible, he’s always been: no friends, no girlfriend, only him and his brilliant mind; when he was younger he had suffered because no one acknowledged him, now he understands he has a superpower that helps him navigate corporate life, absorbing all the relevant information, without anyone realizing what he’s doing.

You greet him whenever you stumble upon him in the corridors, still grateful he solved a computer issue you had the day of a big presentation, the reason why he’s met you in the first place and every gentle smile you direct his way, adds fuel to the fire of his obsession. He’s racked his own brains for days, after that first fateful encounter, wondering how he could start a conversation with you, cloning your phone had been the only way he thought he could find something you two had in common. It saved him a gaffe, when he saw all the photos with your fiancé, and gave him so much insight inside your brain, to understand you were the woman for him; of course you are far more creative that he’ll ever be, your soul gentler than his, but you are smart and being so different will only add to you two’s relationship, once he’s gotten rid of your boyfriend.

Michael is working on the new firewall, hidden in his own basement office. He’s thankful that the other IT people are misanthropes as he is and don’t mind that he’s working with his headphones on, on the contrary, everyone is wearing headgear to focus better on their task, the difference being, he’s listening to you. Your day is slow, with the big project finished, you and your team can kick back a bit, have a chat while ironing the last wrinkles.

Michael has been listening while you were chatting with that stupid cow, Marissa, about the last movie you’ve watched at that theater that shows mostly old black and white flicks; Michael has managed to garner quite the knowledge about old time Hollywood and Cinecittà and has discovered a fondness for old Hammer movies himself, even though the movies he prefers the most star you while you’re pleasuring yourself (something you’re doing quite frequently, since the asshole doesn’t seem to be that interested in you anymore), the theater? Your webcam and your apartment.

His focuses his attention when you go to have a coffee with your ‘work wife’ Jenny; through your phone he hears that you two are going downstairs, to the cafeteria of the building: one day you and him will do the same, pick a place to call your own, just to have a break. You have only bought your phone with you, it’s easy for him to listen to the inane chat, even though the cafeteria is packed; he’s not truly focusing on the conversation, just to the sound of your lovely voice as you wait for your coffee (espresso, a splash of oat milk and half sugar) and your favorite pastry (pain au chocolat, vegan); it’s when the asshole’s name drops that he stops working and focus only on you.

“You know we’ve been trying truly hard, at least we used to.” You say with a defeated tone he doesn’t like. “Then we stopped for his big project, I understand that he couldn’t follow that and my hormonal cycle.”

Michael grits his teeth; he’s been looking out for you for the better part of the year, before? He wasn’t your guardian angel and it had been difficult for him to put together the pieces, since you don’t use that many apps to store your personal life and information.

“Wait.” Jenny stops you. “Wasn’t he the one who wanted to start trying again?” “Yes.” From your tone only Michael can imagine you pinching the bridge of your nose. “He’s been repeating me to check my ovulation, write everything down or use those pregnancy like sticks, and what does he do the weekend I am at my peak? Leaves for work!”

Michael has to clench his fists when he understands what you and Jenny are talking about: children. You and the asshole having a baby!

Michael has to leave his small office and storms to the bathroom where he can pace around like a caged beast: that son of a bitch wants to knock you up, while he’s having an affair with the whore next door?

Calm, he tells himself, you need to stay calm and focused.

“What kind of trip is that?” He hears Jenny ask. “Work. His firm is trying to promote a new kind of prosthesis during this orthopedics conference; he has to be there.” “Why can’t you go with him? Take the weekend off? You wouldn’t be the only partner to go, I think”. “There have been some issues.” Your voice lowers conspiratorially. “Some of his colleagues had gone with their mistresses, on firm expenses and now all family members are banned from going.” “Hmm.” Jenny doesn’t seem too convinced. “Are you sure he wants to truly try?

Michael hears you sigh and wished he was there, not in this stupid bathroom!

“We are more distant. I keep telling myself that we had to both work on big projects at the same time, that we were forced to focus on work more than we would have liked and that, after the storm, things would go back to normal.”

Michael hears you sniff and the soft sound of Jenny’s hand on yours.

“What’s your gut feeling, love?” She asks, with a quiet voice. “That is not a storm and that he’s asked to try for a baby again because he doesn’t know how to handle all of this.” “Perhaps him going away for the weekend isn’t such a bad thing.”

Michael likes Jenny, she’s smart, calls IT only when she has a real issue and treats all of them like they are people, not the weird nerds hiding in the basement; he reckons Jenny is a bit of a nerd as well, based on the Star Trek knickknacks on her desk. Yes, when you and him are together, she’s one of the friends he’ll advise you to stick with: you’ll have to drop many of them, too stupid for you, and for him, but not Jenny, she can stay.

Michael hides in one of the stalls and opens the secret app on his phone where he keeps all your photos and videos. Some are racy, you pleasuring yourself using your favorite dildo and clit sucker, your sobs of pleasure going straight to his cock every time, but that’s not what he is looking for as his thumb swipes through all the pics he has, until he’s found the one he loves the most: you on the sofa, dressed in an oversized jumper, as you read your book. You look homely, the picture of what he wants your lives to be: quiet and filled with each other’s presence, you two don’t need anyone else, Or perhaps...

His mind goes back to the conversation he’s just heard. Michael doesn’t truly care for children but for you? He’ll give you a soccer team of babies if only you asked, fuck you full of his cum until he’s sure he’s bred you, only to fuck you some more once you’re full. His finger slides through the photos until he finds one of you in your bathing suit, just to imagine your tummy full of his child and your breast swollen with milk, begging to be sucked: yeah, the idea of knocking you up becomes more and more appealing as the minutes pass. He just needs to make sure the asshole doesn’t manage before he does.

Michael goes back to his cubicle with a lighter heart, now that he knows what the stakes are; he even whistles his favorite song as he orders a bouquet of the flowers you love (white callas and light pink lilies), to have them sent to your workstation: this has been his only outward way to express his feelings for you and today you need something nice to look at, after your heartfelt conversation with Jenny. As he focuses again on the firewall, Michael mentally pats himself on the back for having cloned the asshole's phone by mistake: you will have to know what is going on, it will hurt you, but he’s going to be there for you, unlike your fiancé.

Later that night, Michael is storing all he has on the asshole on the USB pen he’s bought on the way back to his small apartment; as one of the computers is working on the background, out of curiosity he checks if what the asshole has told you about the ban on partners going to conventions is true or not: if he’s lying, he’s going to add to the mountain of proofs he has, if not, well, it means that even him plays fair sometimes.

He stares at the desktop, before clicking on his browser icon: obviously is a picture of you, a selfie you’ve taken on holiday; you look so relaxed and happy, the shadows the straw hat you’re wearing paint on the skin of your cleavage are so elegant: he’s never met a woman who can be classy even when wearing a skimpy bikini. You are truly a Goddess among your kind, the best and the smartest, created just for him. He hopes you’ll let him snap racy pictures of you, once you two are together; nothing obscene or pornographic, just to celebrate your beauty and grace. Michael thinks he will be able to convince you, otherwise something in your water to make sure you’re pliant will make do.

You don’t want to be at this stupid office party. Yes, your last project was a success, all your colleagues want to celebrate, but you are in no mood, thanks to your cheating, asshole of a boyfriend.

You don’t know who sent you the USB pen, you’re not sure you’ll ever thank them for opening your eyes, but the truth is in front of you and you have no way to stop knowing what has been happening behind your back; given the chance, would you rather not have received the envelope and the USB? Nursing your umpteenth cocktail you’re not sure of the answer.

The envelope was white and lacked a return address, which was unusual but not overly so: the local Catholic Church leaves leaflets when Christmas and Easter are near, to promote the activities during these periods of time, never envelopes but you thought they were changing their strategies and opened it once you were home, alone as usual. The USB had surprised you, the printout of the reservation made of your fiancé and the girl next door, for the conference, propelled you to the bathroom, where you threw up your lunch and afternoon snack.

There was another message, smaller, that invited you to check the USB pen in your hand, if you wanted to know the truth; you stayed rooted on the spot for the longest time, torn between wanting to ignore everything, or let the bomb explode. Time passed, punctuated by the old clock in the kitchen, until you made up your mind, and choose the latter, you’re a daughter of Pandora after all, and plugged the USB in your computer: a barrage of text, photos and audio messages attacked you, you managed to go through a small percentage of them, before you had to run to the bathroom to throw up again, your stomach churning bile until you had nothing left to give. After this onslaught you cried with your knees tight against your chest, until you felt so tired you’d sleep on the cold bathroom floor, but you forced yourself to go back to the living room and went through all the proofs of your fiancé’s infidelity with the whore next door.

You didin’t know your personal guardian angel was listening to everything and looking using the smart TV you’ve bought last year. Michael’s heart hurt with your pain, he wished he was there to comfort you; if only you had waited for him, instead of being with the asshole, he wouldn’t have to make you go through all of this. It was your fault for not having faith that your true love was waiting for you: you’ll go through this cathartic experience and then be free to start your new life, the one Michael will tailor for you, and for himself.

With gritted teeth he watched the fight you have with the asshole, all the excuses he spewed, and then the insults against you, before he left slamming the door. He saw you angrily drink and cry until you passed out on the couch and he stayed up all night, watching you through the TV to make sure you were still breathing. It hurt him that you were hurt, but it was the price to pay for a better future.

You have been on autopilot for the rest of the week: went to work, where you used a mere fraction of your attention on the last details of the finished project, and then returned home to cry. You fiancé, better, former fiancé at this point, didn’t even try to patch things up with you, on Thursday, after you returned from work, all his stuff had disappeared and he hadn’t even left a note or sent you a message. You truly spiraled after that, called your best friend and wept on the phone for hours, until you head hurt; on a whim you had even thought about not going to work on Friday, but you couldn’t, not with the presentation of the bloody project and the celebration party afterwards. You decided to settle with finishing the alcohol at home and sent disparaging texts to your ex, who never answered them (little you knew that your own guardian angel had to do with that, and with the fact that he had disappeared with all his belongings; that was not something Michael thought you needed to worry your pretty head with).

You played your part on Friday, said your little spiel and shook hands on command, wore a fake smile for everyone to see, until you could hide in the conference room, nursing glasses after glasses of cheap alcohol, until you felt like enough time had passed to return home.

You’re sitting at the big desk, facing morosely the incredible view from such a high floor, with a glass and bottle you’ve taken from the open bar. You’re drunk, it's so easy to ignore the little voice in your head that’s telling you to stop, call a Uber and go home when your tummy is sloshing with alcohol. You’re so detached from your body that the door opening with a small creak doesn’t scare you.

“I thought nobody was here.”

You turn your head slowly and feel the strain of your eyes as they focus on the intruder. On first sight you don’t recognize him, then his name comes back to you Michael, one of the IT guys who solves all your technical issues. You’ve met him a couple of times, once when Marissa had some issued with her computer. You had felt bad for the guy, who had to come upstairs to simply turn the switch Marissa had swore was already on the right position. He had said something nasty about your colleague under his breath, ‘vapid cunt’, or something among those lines, as he was leaving. You didn’t approve of his language, but understood his frustration: he probably had to deal with stupid accidents like that all the time, his patience must have slipped; you had stopped him before he entered the lift and said you were sorry on your colleague’s behalf. You could have sworn his eyes had focused on you, behind his tick glasses, as if he was assessing you, judging you, but it was just a moment, then his blue eyes seemed to clear and you had repeated yourself that you have been consuming too much true crime, if such an innocuous man could cause weird thoughts in your head.

You had seen him around, he had saved your arse when your computer stopped working the day of a big presentation, tall and gangly, and always greeted him with a smile and a wave, which he would awkwardly respond to: he was one of the many people you knew, but weren’t truly friends with.

“Hi.” You try to sound sober. “Far from the madding crowd as well?”

Ok, you tell yourself, that’s not too bad.

Michael gently closes the door, you don’t see it but he locks it as well, before he walks towards you.

“Something like that.”

You stare at him, truly taking his appearance in for the first time. He’s awkward, standing the way he does a couple of chairs away from you, but not ugly: he should dress better and wear more stylish glasses, but he is handsome, in a nerd kind of way; his eyes are a beautiful shade of blue, and he is tall, not imposing but with large shoulders.

“Come.” You say, patting the chair next to you. “Don’t stand where you are. Fancy a drink?”

Almost knocking a chair over, Michael walks where you are and stiffly sits.

“I think I am full for the night.” He answers, when you offer him your own glass. “Are you sure? I’d loathe to drink by myself.” “Sure.” He answers. “Uhm, congratulation with the project.” He adds.

You pour yourself a generous amount of alcohol and drink it down in one go.

“That? Child’s play.” “Still, a great amount of money coming this way.” “Yeah.” You’re suddenly more morose than before. “All I am good for.”

You sway on the chair and distantly feel Michael’s hands, his very large hands, grab you by your shoulders before you can fall.

“I’m fine Mickey boy.” You slur with your face dangerously close to his. “I’m nothing but trash worth kicking anyway!”

You shrug him off and try to keep an upright position.

“Don’t say that about yourself!”

Something in his tone forces your drunken mind to focus on him.

“What do you know?” You bare your teeth at him and he has to keep you upright again. “I’m with this guy for years, years! I turn down the position in the USA office for him! Lose weight! Learn how to cook like his sodden mama and what does he do? He fucks the next door neighbor, that fat cow! I have to starve myself and be shamed when I can’t be a bloody size 8 and he fucks her! Sends her dick picks! Talks shit about me!”

The same way rage had possessed you, it disappears, leaving you a shaking handful of nerves; before you even realize it, you fall against Michael and start crying, fat, inconsolable sobs against his ugly sweater.

Michael holds you tight, reveling in the fact that you are in his arms, never mind the reason: you’ve opened up your heart to him, you’re seeking him for consolation! Not Jenny, not your best friend, but him! Because you know, in your heart of hearts, that Michael is the one for you!

He knows he’s awkward as he caresses your back and tries to murmur soothing words against your hair, but it doesn’t matter, not when all his hard work has come into fruition!

“I’m so sorry.” He hears from the general direction of his chest. “I don’t know what happened.” “That’s fine.” He answers, his arms still caging you. “Truly Michael, I don’t know what possessed me.”

When you finally manage to lift your head from his chest, you stare into his eyes, now dark pools your drunken brain can’t read.

Michael loses himself in your beautiful face and in the pain still marring your features: you need consolation and not the kind that words offer. He hadn’t planned all of this when he had followed you in the conference room, but you are in his arms, needy and sad and his cock is rock hard. You are causing all of this, he tells himself, because you need this and him. And he can’t say no to you.

His big hand sneaks into your hair to pull you closer to him; in your drunken state you don’t realize what’s happening, if not when his lips crash on yours, uncoordinated and dry. You try to push him away, to beg him to stop, but he uses your parted lips to slip his tongue in to deepen the kiss, his free hand grabs your hips and he pulls you on the table, slotting himself between your parted legs, his erection shocking you. When he starts kissing your neck, you try to push him away again, too drunk and weak to manage and he grabs your wrist in his big hand, to push you against the cold glass of the table; his free hand slips under your skirt and his fingers sneak under your panties.

“If you don’t want me, why are you so wet?”

He towers over you, his eyes unreadable behind his glasses and you can’t help but sob again: your drunken brain can’t find an adequate response, your body on fire after such a long time without another person’s touch.

Your body arches when his fingers slip inside your cunt, warm and wet, to fuck your hole hard and fast: he’s seen you masturbate so many times he knows how you like it, how you want his thumb on your clit, how to curl them to find your G spot and bully it, while you trash and cry, your muscles impossibly tight around him. He knows the sounds you’re making, those high pitched sobs that mean you’re close.

“Nooo…” You moan when his fingers leave your body.

Michael’s stare his cold and burns you at the same time, you have to hide your face because you can’t stand it deep into your soul; roughly he forces you to look at him.

“Look at me when I fuck you.” His palm cups your cunt cruelly. “You don’t get to come if you stop staring at me.”

Your drunken mind wants to come, wants an orgasm to take the pain away, it doesn’t matter who gives it to you, as long as your heart stops hurting. Then you will forget all about it.

A scared sound escapes your mouth when his big cock is revealed to you: you’ve never had anything so tick inside of you, you’re scared. Michael seems to revel in the fear he sees in your eyes, he can feel his erection grow with it, the knowledge that you’re finally at his mercy fueling his desire: you’re going to take all of him and be grateful that his seed will grow inside your belly, he’s going to give you all the time to adjust, but he’s coming inside of you and you with him.

Impatient he pulls your shirt and bra out of the way to free your beautiful breasts and he jacks himself faster at the sight of your tits. He bats your hands away when you try to cover yourself and curls one hand around a breast, until you cry out in pain.

“You’re all mine to see.” The vise on your breast is so tight he’s going to leave imprints. “Say it!”

You’re drunk and petrified, you don’t understand where this violence comes from, you just want to come and be done with all of this.

“I’m… I’m all yours to see.” You manage to say with tears threatening to fall from your eyes. “It wasn’t so hard.” Michael’s hand travels from your abused tit to your cheek to dry the tears already there. “I want to make you feel good, but you have to behave. Will you be my good girl?”

If you weren’t this drunk you’d fight him off you, scream bloody murder until someone comes to your rescue, but you’re drunk and desperately need all the human connection that you can scrape. You’d never sleep with Michael, not in a million years, but you’re not in your right mind and you just slump against the cool glass, incapable of stopping him.

Michael’s bulbous head nudges your wet entrance, slowly he slides in and groans at how wet you are; he hasn’t had many partners but no cunt has felt as perfect as yours, the ripple of your muscles as your body desperately tries to adjust to his size makes his blood boil, your pained moans and keens spur him on and his pushes become faster and faster, the more your cunt opens up for him. Desperate you try to relax, the pain of his intrusion mixes with pleasure, your drunken mind is confused, your body arches when he bottoms out and your eyes roll in their sockets: you’ve never been so full in your entire life.

Michael has to stop once he is sitting fully inside of you, your hole strangles his cock in ways no other cunt has ever managed, your nipples are erect with the pleasure he’s giving you and you’re making those small sounds that have him want to fuck you hard and fast, but he’s promised you pleasure, and he is no liar. Your tearful eyes are on him as he bends his back to envelope one nipple in his mouth to suck, gently, the other is getting pinched by his long fingers; slowly the pleasure mounts over the pain you’ve been feeling, your drunken body responds to his ministration and you moan, eyes on his as he switches between nipples with satisfied groans, your hips even lift to invite him to move, and he follows your movements, picking up speed when he feels your muscles give up to his ownership of your body.

You moan and keen when he picks up speed and he pulls your legs over his arms to fold you and fuck you faster, your wet cut squelches with every push, his cockhead bullies your G spot mercilessly and you try to squirm away, the pleasure too much and not enough. Michael bends against your body again and kisses you, tongue proprietary in your mouth he snuffs your scream when you come, your cunt so tight around his cock that he follows, copious in your hungry hole, and keeps fucking you, his erection still at full mast, fueled by your desperate sounds of overstimulation: he’s dreamed about this for too long to stop now.

You try to beg, to scream, but his hand around your throat cuts off your desperate prayers, your scratch his wrist and he simply fucks you harder, grinds against your poor clit tighter and your legs kick against his back, spurring him on: he knows you like it hard and even if you don’t? It’s what you’re getting now.

With a groan he pulls out and turns you face first on the table, fast he enters you again and grabs your tits to use your body as leverage to fuck your hole savagely, his hold the only reason your body is still up, your hands try to grab uselessly at the glass, his heavy balls slap against you and pleasure burns through you, painful it courses through your body and you squirm with it, tears falling from your eyes as his cock rapes your hole deeper and deeper, until he comes, panting your insides again, triggering your own orgasm.

You pant, the cold of the table nice against your over heated skin. Distantly you feel Michael’s lips on your nape, he’s leaving small kisses and nibbles on the soft skin, when you try to move you moan, your cunt curling around his still erect cock.

“Michael, please.” You beg, so sore already. “If you didn’t want me, why is your cunt strangling my cock?” He whispers cruelly in your ear.

Michael can’t believe his body can still be in need of yours, but he’s not going to say no, not when your cunt is massaging his erection so deliciously. Fast he removes his cock and plugs your cunt closed with his fingers, he can’t risk his seed to go to waste, not when he’s trying to knock you up; one handed he turns you on your back again and enters your hole with a groan: he’s found his home and he’s not going to leave it.

“Please Michael.” You sob. “I’m so sore!”

He cups your cheek and kisses you again. You submit to his ownership, afraid of triggering his rage; distantly a part of your brain is screaming that you don’t want this, that you should fight him, but you don’t have the strength to, not when you just want to forget your ex for a while ans are so scared of his rage: you will feel dirty afterwards and will drunk yourself in a stupor to forget, but that’s problems for future you, now you can't do anything else, you just want the pain to stop.

“I was too forceful, was I?” Michael caresses your body, already getting used to the feel of your skin under his. “I’ll go slow this time, love. Give me your last one and we’ll stop.”

For now, he thinks. He’s not done with marking all your holes as his.

“Don’t hurt me.” You sob, small and pathetic. “Never.”

His hips move slowly against yours, long and deep pushes that you feel everywhere in your body. His hands are at your breasts again, massaging them in tandem with his pushes inside of you; you squirm, your muscles sore with the abuse he’s subjected you to, your clit inflamed with the way he grinds against it, still sparks of pleasure explode in your muddled brain, your cunt clenches around him, pulling him in tighter and tighter, that he can’t help but grind against you, the image of the ring of his come and yours around his base and the squelch of your hungry hole spurring him on. He’s not going to last long and you’re coming with him again, sucking all your seed inside of you, until it takes. He’s going to fuck you through your pregnancy as well, his hips grind faster when he imagines the added pressure of your full belly and your tits, leaking milk he’s going to be all the happier to suck.

“No Michael please!” You beg when he starts fingering your clit. “Be my good girl.” He groans, punishing you with hard thrusts. “You’re going to come and drain my cock dry, or I’m not going to stop until you do.”

Your body arches at his words, the part of your mind that’s still coherent reels at the realization that he’s been fucking you bareback, your cunt clenches at the thought, tighter and tighter as he fucks your deeper and faster, until you come with a pained sob and he follows you, emptying his balls fully inside of you.

He stays rooted inside of you, willing his seed to take as your muscles massage his soft cock to the point of overstimulation; you’re a mess of tears and ruined make up under him, still too shook after so many orgasms, and he uses your fragility to enact the last part of his plan.

He grabs the glass and bottle still intact after your coupling and fishes for the small packet of drugs he’s bought on less than savory websites (the wonders of the deep web, if one knows where to look) and dissolves one capsule in the remaining alcohol. Gently he raises your head and forces you to drink everything: you need to be pliant for this part, he can’t risk you acting silly if you two meet some coworkers on the way out.

Once you’ve drunk everything, he stays inside of you, just enjoying your body as the drug takes effect, only then he’s going to dress you and help you back to your apartment, where he’s going to fuck you for the whole weekend. Hopefully his purchase will not be needed, but if you misbehave he’ll have to give some more of it, he needs you to be pliant, ready to follow his breeding project. As you stare at him with glassy eyes, Michael decides he’s going to drug you anyway and once the effects drain off your system, hopefully you’ll buy his story, that you two went on a weekend binge of alcohol and sex. If things will go as he’s planned, come Sunday you’ll be embarrassed and he will buy you breakfast and ask you out on a proper date, if you start complaining, then he has to use plan B, the one he had devised when he had found out you had a fiancé. You don’t know it, but if you are going to be a silly goose, he’s going to hide you away in the small farm out in the country he’s bought under a false name (he is a man who needs little to survive and has managed to put away a big sum easily), until he can break you and remake you into his perfect little wife. He will have to lock you in the basement for a time and use the fake posts he’s prepared in advance to justify you disappearing from your life, but he’s positive that’s not going to be needed: you are his other half, after all.

[lemonlover1110]

Please please please write an angst of doctor nanami cheating on reader with a random nurse

Pairing: Kento Nanami x gn!Reader

Warnings: Angst, Cheating

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*slowly working on requests! They're still closed so don't send anything in

Your husband often works long hours, but as an ER doctor it was expected. The day you started dating Kento, he made it very clear that he works a lot. He’s called in unexpectedly, and while it might seem like he has the day off, he could be called in. You were more than okay with it.

You often feel lonely while Kento works, especially at night. In the beginning you didn’t mind it but you grow lonelier each day. You wonder if you’ve made the right decision by getting married to him. You weren’t made to be so lonely– But whenever you’re thinking of leaving and starting over, he’s off for a day or two, and he reminds you why you’re with him.

He’s so sweet when he’s back around. He gets you flowers, does all the chores that you hate (because he knows that you hate it and he wants to keep you happy), he watches a movie that you like even if he wants to watch something else, and he cooks your favorite food. He’s so affectionate, so loving. He wants you to know that you’re his perfect wife. 

Of course you believe it, why wouldn’t you? Kento has only given you reasons to trust him. You believe his every word, trying to avoid thinking about any thought that makes you doubt your husband. 

He’s called in on your anniversary. He had the day off but things didn’t go your way. However, you had a backup plan because you had an idea this would happen. He’s working now more than ever so of course you had a backup plan.

You wear your pretty little dress, holding a bag with Kento’s favorite food. You also have a box of his favorite chocolate, and a small gift. You wander into the hospital, and the staff already  knows you well so you don’t have an issue getting through.

Majority of the staff knows your plan since you called around. You’re simply just having a romantic dinner– Well as romantic as it can be in a hospital break room. You’re smiling, walking confidently through the hospital hallways. You’re right on Kento’s break, and everyone else assured you that he’d be alone.

When you open the break room’s door, you see that you’ve been lied to. Your heart drops and shatters into a million pieces, the bag that’s in your hand slipping away and falling to the ground. Your eyes widen and they fill with tears. You can’t believe the sight in front of you, your husband’s lips on another woman, and by the looks of it, it wasn’t going to stop with kissing.

You freeze in time, watching your loving husband with someone else. You’re simply shocked. Kento wouldn’t do this to you… Not him. That can’t be your husband. Your hands are shaking, your heart feeling as if it’s about to beat out of your chest. The tears finally begin to spill, and there’s a lump in your throat that holds back a sob. 

No– Kento Nanami wouldn’t. Two other doctors must’ve gotten confused because your husband would never do this to you. You wipe the tears and you swallow the lump in your throat, shaking your head. It’s clearly not your husband. You clear your throat, “Sorry, I must’ve–”

He pulls away, alert. You see his face, and your heart breaks all over again. Even if you try to delude yourself, it won’t work. The woman is also staring at you but you aren’t all too focused on her; you don’t care about her. 

He yells out your name as you turn on your heel and begin to walk away. He’s trying to run after you, but you’re walking as fast as you can. 

“Please! Let me explain!” He yells and you try to block out his voice but it’s hard when he sounds so desperate. He does eventually catch up to you, grabbing your arm. You try to break free from his grasp but it’s too strong. You refuse to look at him, wanting to keep hidden the tears that stream down your face. “Honey, let’s talk.”

“There’s nothing to talk about, Kento.” You try to sound as normal as you can even when your voice threatens to break. He still refuses to let go. “Let go of me, I never want to see you again.”

“Can we just talk please? Privately?” He asks, and you take a moment to think. He’s not going to let you go so easily, even if you want to leave. You’ll make it fast. You finally turn to look at him, and while you try to act tough, it’s impossible when you look at his face. The man that you love to the moon and back betrayed you. He’s someone that you wanted to grow old with, to have children with. You gave him your all, however, that doesn’t seem to be enough for him.

“On our anniversary? Really?” You respond, and it feels as if his voice has been taken from him. You wipe your tears before crossing your arms. You have to look away from him. “I thought you’d never do this to me, Kento. I really thought you were the one.”

He bites down his lip, he really doesn’t know what to say. For a minute you stand in complete and utter silence.

“Are you going to say anything?” You ask, and he’s scrambling for words. He comes up with nothing. You end up nodding before walking away. You hear him again,

“Honey, wait!” 

Just this time, he doesn’t run after you.

[i-heart-hxh]

In all honesty why do you think Killua made the number two comment to Gon? I feel like he doesn’t realize how messed up that is to say to someone who has gone through extensive trauma trying to prove himself to a father who also put him in “second place” to something he deemed more important. It was hurtful and I don’t see how that can be repaired now. Even if they do reunite Gon is going to just step on eggshells and fear that even one slip up will cause Killua to just leave him again. Idk I just feel like separation wasn’t the solution here. They needed to talk and then stay together. But “taking a break” rarely works out for any relationship. It also sucks that Gon constantly told Killua how important he was to him but Killua NEVER returned this sentiment verbally so Gon’s just stuck thinking he’s a piece of shit who destroyed his most important relationship. Killua really did just say “screw Gon I have Alluka now”.

Hello!

I don't agree with this interpretation at all; to me, there are a number of complex reasons why Killua made that comment, and I don't think it will destroy their relationship by any means.

This post--In-Depth analysis on the Hidden Reasons behind Gon & Killua's separation scene (ep 147) Why Gon is 'Number 2'--is the best starting point for anyone trying to understand the separation, in my opinion. It's cohesive, uses supporting evidence from the series and demonstrates the careful wording used in the separation, and it makes more sense than any other interpretation I've read of why Killua would make such a comment to Gon. I keep referring back to this post because I truly think it holds keys to understanding the separation that other posts I've seen don't.

In addition to the insight provided in that post--where Killua is trying to put some distance between him and Gon for Gon's safety and well-being, essentially--I also think it's:

a) Partly how Killua is trying to steel himself to leave Gon, by telling himself, Gon, and Alluka that Alluka is his priority for now

b) Part of Killua's campaign of teasing Gon lightheartedly on the topic, to bring it up while at the same time downplaying the emotional effects of what happened between them--because when they're separating is not the right time for them to seriously address it or work through it

I do think the second place comment hurt Gon a little, but...Gon is already aware that he hurt Killua, and after his life was literally saved by Alluka (Nanika), being put in "second place" is not the worst outcome ever, honestly. Plus, it confirms he's still one of the most important people to Killua even after everything that happened between them! Killua is not saying Gon is trash to him now, even though it is a bit of a jab.

I've also said before that I think Togashi had Killua make this comment with awareness that we, as the audience, would be like, "Uh-huh Killua, sure, interesting of you to say this so shortly after you centered your entire life on him for basically the whole series and even seriously considered doing a lovers suicide with this guy..." We're most likely supposed to see it as Killua not being fully honest, even though Alluka does obviously mean a lot to Killua and by necessity she has to be his priority now. Plus, even Alluka herself says she'll give Killua back to Gon after a while. She must have some idea of how much Gon means to Killua, to be so willing to "give him back." I've said this before, but I see this line from Alluka about giving Killua back to Gon as a promise from Togashi to the audience that this isn't forever.

Gon isn't clueless; he knows Killua cares about him even though Killua struggles to express it verbally. The degree of trust and unspoken understanding between them in the dodgeball match is a good (albeit complicated) example of this. The two didn't communicate to the degree they needed to during Chimera Ant Arc, which makes sense because they're young and have their own issues and it was terribly traumatic for both for them, but they also have a good understanding of each other overall, and it's not giving Gon enough credit to assume he has no idea just because Killua hasn't said it. He doesn't know the full extent of Killua's feelings for him, certainly (I hope he will someday!), but he is aware Killua cares about him. Even when it comes to the separation, Killua expressing his pain shows that he still cares about Gon! He's saying that what happened still hurts, because he still cares! He's making light of it, but it's honestly a step in the right direction for him to be discussing it at all. If they can't be honest with each other about how what happened impacted them, they can't heal.

Of course it would be better for their relationship if they talked it out fully and came to some sort of resolution, but neither of them were in a place where they could do that quite yet. Killua is too closed up emotionally and hurting from seeing Gon essentially die in front of him, and Gon needs to recover from essentially throwing his life away and saying those things to Killua that we know he regrets. They do need some time apart to reflect and grow.

Are the two boys in a complicated emotional situation currently? Yes. Do I think this dooms them to never reconnect or heal their relationship? Absolutely not. I see their separation as more of a "We gotta go our separate ways for now because we both have things we have to deal with," (both externally and internally) than anything final. They agree to stay in touch, they express sadness at having to part, they make it clear several times that this is a temporary parting. Why make them clearly unsatisfied with having to part if they're not going to have an opportunity to make things right later?

[tastytoastz]

Since the latest chapter dropped, I've been thinking. how would 2b2t fit and Qsmp Fit react to one another if they were to somehow meet?

Oh this is such a good question, and it depends on some things.

Like, if Pac or Ramon was there q!fit would not let 2b2t!fit anywhere near them. Not only in fear for what he might do to them but also cuz q!Fit dosn't want them to see him like this.

If the two Fit's just met and we skip over the whole confusion of "there are two of us now" i think 2b2t!Fit would berate q!fit for having 'gone soft' and stupid for trusting people so much and so openly talking about he has a boyfreind and being gay, and that his house is not well hidden and all these things. But there would also be a lot of envy and jellousy. That this q!Fit fianaly get to live as himself around people who trust him and he trusts, that he can relax and let his guard down while 2b2t!Fit is still stuck in the worst of it, still stuck in hell and forced to deal with that. But he would also try to get q!Fit to be less scared of being well...him. Tell him to smile more with his teeth, show the fangs and not hide he likes thrill of the hunt and that they're a dangerous person. That he should not be a shamed or hide these sides of him.

q!Fit would be a bit pissed and ashamed of his past and some of the bad things they did. Some horrible stuff had been necissary for survival some had just been cruel and it would be hard to face his past as it would just be reminders of some of the hardest parts of his life. Would also be an issue of q!Fit being worried other people would see him differently if they met his past self, as he tried so hard to hide the worst and scary parts of himself and 2b2t!fit dosn't give a singel fuck about hiding those parts.

There would also be some humor, they are still very alike in some regards, i don't think it all would be angst. Talking about some fun stuff they did, talking about memories and things they enjoyed of 2b2t.

But even if Q!Fit would be annoyed and not let Pac near him, and ashamed of how 2b2t effected him in some ways, I think he would also hold a lot of pity and empathy for his old self as well. That his old self had to suffer so much and go through so much pain and horror and shame and still make it out alive. He would be thankful for him keeping them alive and keeping them going long enough that q!fit could start to heal from it, kept them going till he had a chance to go to the island and have somewhat of a good life.

And In the end i think q!Fit just tell 2b2t!Fit "You're going to be okay"

[reccyls]

What did you like most about Drake's route? Also how is his relationship with the mansion residents? Since he became a new resident of the mansion. And did he continue to stay?

Let me start with the non-spoilery bits first and then go into more detail beneath the cut.

I really liked how Drake's route handled a bunch of different subplots and how things all tied together. There's a lot happening in his route and although there are some bits where it feels like some abrupt turns have been taken, on the whole, I think that it all fit together pretty well. I also really like Drake as a character, he's fun as well as mysterious, and finding out all the layers as his route progressed was really enjoyable. He might have shot up to become my top favorite in the game.

As for how Drake gets along with everyone at the mansion, aside from a pretty bad first impression (first thing he does once he gets through the door at the mansion is hold the MC at knifepoint), he gets along very well with everyone, and very quickly too. Within 1 or 2 weeks he's already bantering with everyone and has pretty much become a part of regular life. He spars with Jean, pokes fun at Theo's obssession with Vincent, joins Arthur and Dazai in terrorizing Isaac, etc.

And for the spoilery/more in-depth stuf...

So the subplots that get brought up early on and slowly tackled throughout his route are:

Drake's hidden colder side and his trust issues

Additionally, what is it about the new moon and full moon that is special when it comes to him

The MC's own issues, and how that helps to develop her relationship with Drake. By the time Drake's route starts, she's been stranded in the past for a couple of months, and she struggles a lot with genuinely enjoying her life now because of all the people she's become close to and the memories she's made here, as well as also feeling like she is betraying everything she had in the 21st century by feeling that way.

The connection between Drake and Vlad

Drake and Galileo's relationship, and what they're doing and why

A pickpocket girl that MC and Drake run into a lot

The appearance of vampire hunters in Paris

It's a lot of spinning plates and I feel like his route handles them quite well! There's a bit of abruptness here and there, particularly with the vampire hunters and having everything come to a head when Drake shows his true colors (the back quarter of his route feels very loaded with reveals/action), but overall I really liked the way his route was plotted out.

He does not stay at the mansion, however. He pretty thoroughly burns that bridge when he launches an attack on everyone and makes it very clear to everyone that he plans to come after the MC next.

Even after he and the MC fully realize their feelings and work things out between them, he doesn't return. Drake still can't fully let go of his own anger and disgust at the world, so he still plans to journey together with Galileo in order to see the future he wants come to pass. He does make a bet with the MC, though: if he wins and he gets to see the end of the world, he'll come and kidnap her away so they can spend what time they have left together. If she wins and the future is one of peace where vampires and humans can live in harmony, he'll hand everything over to her: his body, his heart, and his life, and he'll come to stay together with her. And after escorting her back to Comte's mansion, that is where they part ways.

In the dramatic end, they spend about a year apart before he shows up in her life again. Galileo ditched him, haha (he seems to be playing matchmaker). But Drake's not having that, and says that he's going to hunt Galileo down and asks the MC to walk that journey alongside him. So the two of them don't stay behind in that ending.

Not sure about romantic, I haven't finished that yet.

[forsythi-amitie]

hate this guy. What is he doing. My thoughts on whatever the hell is going on with him and HiMERU as a whole below. I formally apologize if this doesn't make sense because i think i was actually getting more and more delirious while writing it. At some point, i had a dream with HiMERU in it and he died to the hand of his own clone.

I know that HiMERU(oreMERU) decided to replace his brother in the hopes of being able to preserve his image, his dream, and to not let him disappear into obscurity. It's a noble effort, but at the same time it creates so many problems it's incredible. It's something that's been bugging me on and off for a while now.

For one, kaname is in a coma. I'm not sure if he has the slightest clue as to what's been going on. The idea was that when he recovered, he would just fit back into his place that oreMERU was holding for him, but who knows if that's what kaname really wanted, and who knows if he'd actually be able to do that. I'm thinking about this and so..... He basically has a whole life that he has no idea about?

I would say the current HiMERU is.... I guess "not real" in the sense of it's not actually either one of them. Let me explain: kaname, in a way doesn't exist because whatever personality he had prior to being hospitalized has effectively been replaced? It might be oreMERU emulating him, but it's not the real kaname. That also means that because he's replacing his brother, oreMERU doesn't exist either. He's taken on a different name, hidden any kind of personal information about him, and has abandoned his true self entirely for the sake of kaname. Whatever things he does, or people he makes friends with, it's not him, but HiMERU (kaname). (theoretically)

He speaks in the third person to i guess distance "himself" from "HiMERU", but that suggests even more issues. He doesn't have his own "free will" ? He hates tatsumi who was actually a friend of kaname, but because oreMERU doesn't exist, he has to pretend to still be friends. His likes, dislikes, hobbies..... they're all kaname's (i'm pretty sure they are, right?). Everything he does is the actions of someone else, and not himself. If he wanted to do something that wouldn't match the image of HiMERU, he wouldn't be able to. He had a moment where he had to choose between "his" past as HiMERU, and his new future with Crazy:B, and he ended up choosing the latter because that wouldn't be what HiMERU would do.

That's an issue with how he interacts with others as well, since a lot of the time, he's acting as HiMERU and not his true self? Well, in public anyways. I think the members of Crazy:B are closer to his true self than someone like Tatsumi though. If there's one group of people he'd be able to trust, it would be them, (hopefully?) since they didn't know him previously. (Valkyrie just knows his secret, apparently. Shu literally threatened to cut off kaname's life support. )

I think at times oreMERU feels a certain amount of guilt for being able to live freely and have fun as HiMERU? "He" isn't supposed to be having fun. "He" isn't supposed to even exist. I think that makes his life terribly lonely, since if he lets himself relax and truly enjoy himself, would that really be the "right" thing to do? Although i think he's let himself relax over time, seeing as you can't continue to be miserable and worry forever, right?

In the event that kaname never wakes up.... I'll save that for later.

With his life as HiMERU being continued on by his brother, that sort of puts him in a place where his own identity is erased as well. His actions as HiMERU are not his own. He might have friends, but he doesn't have any memories with them, he has no personal connection to them. HiMERU(oreMERU) does. All of the bonds and close friendships he would've had would be completely built on lies. There's a chance that were he actually able to be an idol and act as HiMERU again, he might not actually want that life after what had happened.

The relationships he'd already had we're altered, and the new ones made were not made by him. In a way, his life no longer belongs to him? How would oreMERU possibly explain that he'd just been filling in for kaname while he was asleep? Or for that matter if nothing is explained and oreMERU just disappears, how would kaname be able to continue on, seeing how his life had essentially continued without him? Honestly thinking about this hurts my head i just cannot see this going well at all. In some way, oreMERU has both everything and nothing, because he's the one going out and building bonds with the other characters, yet they're not his to keep.

I'm not sure if HiMERU had thought of that? Or if he did, then not to the level of which he should've. It's like a lie that snowballed out of control, but it's more like an entire landslide at this point. It's identity theft with extra steps but not exactly identity theft and more of just identity borrowing for an extended period of time. If he ends up fully embracing the identity of HiMERU as part of Crazy:B, then what happens to kaname? If kaname doesn't wake up, then what? Everything he did would've been for nothing (according to his plan).

I could talk about how much I hated HiMERU at first for the sole reason of finding him annoying and not liking his blue hair (i think there's a pattern here.), but I'd say my reasons are more complicated than that. It's actually because for a point in time I'd get one of his cards in every scout i did. This guy won't leave me alone. Well, in all seriousness I don't hate him that much. (I have his new year's card.) He's just so incredibly confusing and terrible and endearing in the best way and it's interesting to see him do all of these things for what could be described as the most selfish selfless reasons ever? I think his true self has begun to show more and more as time goes on, which is a good thing, I still worry about him. I don't want him to be happy and then have it ripped away from him. Maybe I do, just a little. (This keeps me up at night.) (I've gone back to revise this a day after I initially wrote it and reading it makes me feel like I'm the one being plagued with the fear of HiMERU's future instead of him. What is wrong with me. )

I have genuinely no clue what to make of him. Is he alright? I admit I don't think i've read all of the stories about him so if i'm missing something that's why. (sorry) This is also mostly my own personal insight on this. I want HiMERU to be happy. Sometimes. He's a funny guy. He's up there on the top 10 enstars characters who have ruined my life. I have properly capitalized HiMERU in every single instance i typed it out.

[strqyr]

I don't disagree with the mystery angle, but as a hypothetical (because I can't deicide which I like better), what do you think of having the mystery as is in show (ie. we know who, don't know what), then building that into who can be trusted? Like, going into mistral and atlas, yes we know who the big bads are now, but who are the pawns this time? Is that person just scared and caged because of Beacon, or because they're working for Salem? Having the audience losing trust alongside the mains

i think this was pretty much what they did with in V7. iirc the writers said the volume's theme would be "trust", which got the audience suspecting just about, well. any one of the new characters we were introduced to, and even some of the old ones; i vividly remember one of the big things after 7.2 being whether ironwood hugging qrow was genuine or if he did that to place a tiny microphone or something like that on his cape lol

and ya know, it was fun time! every new character could have been a double agent, or somehow compromised—watts is in mantle with near full control of its systems, who's to say he couldn't be listening in and scouring through video footage to find something, anything to help with their task?—so who do you trust?

of course, that lack of trust became the main issue between the Good Guys™, there were no surprises in terms of characters working for salem, but still, it worked well, and it kept people on their toes.

in contrast, they gave lionheart working for salem pretty much immediately, which is like. 50/50 for me because on one hand, building up those trust issues, not just in the characters but for the audience as well, already from the mistral arc would have been great... but there were no other characters to suspect besides lionheart, so the difference is hardly there.

but yeah, the "who is working for salem and who is not?" is absolutely an angle i've been thinking about a lot lately; mostly in a sense whether it would work or not if salem—and thus the rest of her followers—would not have been revealed when they were; that if emerald's illusion had been the first time the audience "sees" salem, where most of the information we get of her is from what other characters say about her, then the lost fable, and only then we see salem in present day during 'so that's how it is'. that way tyrian, hazel, and watts would be brand new characters with yet unknown alliances, with some revealing their standing earlier like tyrian, while for watts and hazel it would take a little bit more time.

like, taking watts as an example: he's just some guy who spends time with lionheart. maybe he passes by team rnjr at some point, has a short interaction with them, all cordial and so, because they'd be less likely to recognize him as someone who's supposed to be, ya know. dead. the main point is, everything seems normal about him; there's really no reason to suspect him as someone working for this salem everyone is talking about... and then he shows up with cinder at the branwen tribe's camp and uh-oh, who can you really trust? how deep does salem's network of followers actually go?

of course, these are choices were you win some, you lose some. it all comes down to what you want to focus on; keep salem and her followers hidden for a little bit longer, and you potentially lose the time spend building salem and cinder's dynamic—though this could be changed by simply not revealing salem's other followers while keeping the scenes with just salem and cinder around—but gain the extra layer of mystery and the build-up to "who can you actually trust?"

...rambling aside, yeah, not revealing the kingdom specific pawns immediately upfront could be a fun route to take, absolutely.

[iztarshi]

I think the ending + movie of Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is interesting from a Doylist perspective partly because of how rushed it was - sad as that is from a fan perspective.

In the same way filler and gecko endings came from anime being made from manga that hadn't finished yet, we're seeing storytelling happen under constraints of a) stories with ongoing arcs and character development being popular in western animation right now b) studios still cancelling them with no warning and leaving a minimal amount of episodes to wrap up. We're seeing a lot of slow build up to suddenly fast-paced endings.

So rottmnt goes from being halfway through the second season of a three season story to having six episodes to wrap up. Under those circumstances it does remarkably well! A lot of minor threads - Dr Noe's quest for Raph's tooth, whatever was up with Jupiter Jim's working movie props and yokai sidekick - simply get dropped, but the overall emotional arc of Splinter reconciling with his own mistakes and with his family both past and present comes through loud and clear. The tales of the hidden city episodes coming so soon before the end set up Splinter having reconciled with Draxum and his own feelings about being a mutant too, a good thing to get in before the finale.

Talking of tales of the hidden city, this also lands us on a fairly complete arc for Donnie, almost by chance. Witch Town both contextualised the issues he'd been having with mystic and let him move on from them. I think in a less rushed ending he would have starting working on getting used to mystic powers rather than gone straight to using ninpo with no problem having always used tech before - but on an emotional level it works. It means Donnie is going into learning ninpo without hang ups about it so the fact that he uses it with ease doesn't feel wrong.

Mikey's arc also ends in... kiiiind of not a bad place. We learn why he's so intent on redeeming Draxum, that he feels like he needs to justify his own creation, and he manages to make Splinter understand and get his parents to reconcile. We don't deal with whether Mikey really needs to justify his existence, or whether he's being too hard on the rest of his family by pushing this on them for his peace of mind. Worse, the movie can't even hint at resolutions here because Netflix wanted to focus on characters that were franchise wide and not Rise specific so Draxum gets at most a cameo.

Raph and Leo's hidden city episodes aren't as deep and we end with them in an interesting place because they're mid character arc. Season two was, iirc, meant to end with Raph and Leo as co-leaders. Maybe season three would have worked towards Leo taking leadership alone. The result is that they're in an emotional place where that would make sense as a solution but not yet in a place where the solution has even started to present itself.

Raph starts the series pretty gung-ho about leadership. It's a chance to boss his little brothers around! He gets comments about being "the guy who's always telling us he's our leader" from Donnie. Then the show wears on. Villains get more dangerous. Leo nearly dies in Bug Busters from a call Raph makes. The consequences of failing missions get worse, too. Raph starts taking it all more seriously, becoming increasingly anxious about his brothers and less able to trust that they'll be okay if he's not right there to pick up the slack. He also gets more resentful towards them for making him worry like this. Pizza Puffs shows it best. Raph's feeling trapped by the role he started out wanting.

Leo's behaviour meanwhile is getting increasingly wild. I wish we had had an equivalent to Donnie and Mikey's hidden city episodes where he explained what was going on with him, because it's hard to parse exactly where he's coming from. But he's picking fights with Donnie in a way he didn't in season one. He's refusing to communicate with the team, sometimes outright lying to them. If he's upset that they don't trust him he seems to be dealing with it by being as untrustworthy as possible.

I do think it's a set up for Leo moving towards finding a role on the team that a) makes him feel fully part of it b) requires him to behave more responsibly. Currently he's pulling away, trying to be better than his brothers instead of work with them, and that's what he needs to deal with.

Then the series ends and the focus is necessarily on wrapping up the plot, plus Splinter's relationship with his sons which has been shown as loving but somewhat broken throughout the show. We're rooting for them to understand each other better and pull through to win together and they do. In the most literal-symbolic way possible.

Raph also gets his feelings dealt with as part of the ending. We had him in a bad place and then - since we get no time for anyone, including Leo himself, to realise he's capable of leading - Raph has to remain the leader through the finale. We see him deal with his belief that he has to take care of everyone and how isolated it makes him feel, and learn to open up to his brothers more and rely on them too.

This does have the odd side-effect that the finale seems to show Raph becoming a better leader right before leadership is taken away from him. But the fact that Raph was overwhelmed and stressed by the job is made evident.

Then the movie gets used to tie up the emotional loose ends Raph and Leo's interrupted arc gave us.

One interesting thing about the movie is that despite a lot of its plot being based in this struggle over leadership and Raph and Leo's feelings about it no one ever mentions who the leader is. After seeing one of the deleted scene animatics I kind of get that, though.

The animatic has Raph claiming he never wanted to be leader and just felt he needed to take care of his brothers - which is very much a retcon of Raph's arc in season one. I think ultimately everyone's feelings about leadership were just too complicated to sum up in the movie in a way that wasn't reductive.

Or maybe Netflix just didn't want series specific plot points referenced. Especially since Raph having been the leader until recently is very much a Rise thing, whereas Leo and Raph having fights about Leo's leadership ability is very franchise wide. Even if it's not usually about Leo failing to take things seriously.

But the movie does, imo, a very good job of condensing the story and making the character arcs make sense despite the finale and the declaration of Leo as leader having happened in the middle of them.

Leo's wild behaviour - put on hold for the finale - returns, with the defeat of Shredder and being named leader now being added to outwitting Big Mama as reasons he's riding high. The degree to which it's driven by arrogance, insecurity, or a mixture of the two is still debatable, but it's the continuation of the arc he was on.

Raph's anxious resentment is still there, amplified by the fact that he should be able to get a break now he's not leader, but Leo won't step up and take the weight off his shoulders.

It moves things around. Leo gets thrown in at the deep end and has to realise that he's capable of being a good leader after he's already been leader for a few months. As well as learning that he has to work with his team instead of measuring himself against them and judging who did "better" at everything.

In the end I think it's fascinating how they told a good story around so many constraints.

[rosemaries-shroom]

Confused on your takes now?

C said they're the issue cus yikes

But your vent says otherwise?

Were they bad or were you just pissed off because I know them but I'd still like both sides? Any time I try to ask I get directed here

*everybody* was an issue

We get triggered and fall into guilt spirals and bpd episodes/psychosis episodes. We couldn't trust that they weren't just saying things to get us to leave them alone. That has always been a problem we have, the entire time. We've stated and given them multiple times to leave or step away, we have asked them to tell us when we are being too much. They have always said it's okay, so we believed it was that or cause more problems by shutting everyone out. How we react and how we blame ourselves and how close we've been to kxlling ourselves multiple times, the shame and hiding and all the other bullshit. I don't agree with whoever wrote our vent on their final conclusion because it's not something we've ever tried to just dismiss. We've always apologized and had plans to avoid it happening again. But when we're being triggered every damn day and everyone aside from 1(now 3) fucking person was telling us we weren't to blame for how we've been treated. Its fucking hard to believe the one person, so we'd constantly second guess if they were also telling us the truth. That isn't their fault, it was the house we were living in and the trauma we'd been going through since we were like 4? 5?

They were reacting to all the shit that was happening by closing us off, putting the pressure of ending the relationship on us alone, ect. They were also in a bad place, a bad house, a bad life. They are also a traumatized person who *was* trying their best to be supportive, even if it wasn't how we'd asked/needed they were trying to be there. We have never once fucking thought of them as abusive. We know why they reacted how they did. We know why they felt they had to go about it that way. We *were* pissed and the way everything came out on this blog was definitely dismissing the good they have done. We were still in a very triggered mindset and not thinking about how they had helped us. We probably wouldn't have put as much out there if we'd been thinking clearly. That doesn't make what we posted before invalid, we still agree with the message just wish it hadn't been so harsh.

What they did was too close to how we were treated by our actual abuser. We reacted in a fully traumatized way and did a lot of shit that also wasn't okay. We almost kxlled ourselves because the number of lies and hidden shit coming out suddenly at once, often times completely being the opposite of what they assured us was okay. If it had been like one thing or something fucking fine. But to go from "everyone's partners are asleep and have been for who knows how long"(and all of them being ones who had helped with our struggles on top of that) to "we haven't been reaching out to anyone for months"(even though that was *literally* the reason we tried to be okay with opening up more to them) to "how could you call me him? I'm a stereotypical angry protector, you mightve made him angry but that doesn't excuse how he treated you"(but you're treating us how he treated us(minus the rxping) so???? Which is is???) to "oh everyone's awake, they're here again you can talk to them" because "you think we're like him" *when that wasn't even the point we were trying to make*

We hit our breaking point, quite literally. No, we don't think they were abusive, no we don't think we were abusive, we were two fucking traumatized systems who's reactions to being triggered were not being handled well enough. Who's triggers lined up in a bad way that would have continued down a bad road.

They weren't doing it to hurt us, we weren't doing it to make them feel responsible for our inability to regulate ourselves. It just wasn't a relationship that we could continue knowing we'd still be doing all the work to have things be healthy. When every big Talk recently has left us feeling horrifically guilty and like an asshole for even bringing them up

We wanted it to work, to be able to work through it but it was too much for us after everything we'd just gotten out of. Everyone was an issue. Neither side is in the right or wrong. Everyone involved needs to do the work to be a better person.

[myreia]

3, 19, and 29 for aurcred :> 💗

Thank you, Azia beloved! 🥰

3. By contrast, what was the moment that first made their ~heart~ Soft for the other person? Not necessarily a conscious realization of “I love this person,” but a moment that had them like “Oh…I adore them…”

The history of Aureia and Thancred's relationship is that of upwards momentum only for it to come to a screeching halt due to outside circumstances, losing touch or falling out of sync because of it, and then having to rebuild things from the ground up.

Aur's had three moments where this is the case.

The first: During the very early days of their friendship. They may have known each other for only a few months at the time. But he showed her Ul'dah, got her accustomed to the sights and sounds, the markets, all the unexpected little gems hidden away in different parts of the city. She would likely have never found her footing if not for this.

The second: Sitting on the roof of a building overlooking the Ala Mhigan quarter at night. Their friendship has been thoroughly tested by this point, they have both gone through a harrowing period of hating each other. Most of those issues have been worked through by now, but there's still a lot of hesitance in the way that they treat each other. He gives her something--the ring Nanamo originally gifted her back in Ul'dah, which she pawned for gil in Ishgard, and then it eventually showed up again in a market. There's a lot of feelings attached to that ring, and the fact that he found it, recognized it, and brought it back to her brings a lot of feelings flooding back.

The third: Walking the sands of Amh Araeng on the way to Malikah's Well. After everything they've just gone through, knowing what he put his life on the line for… He's battered and bruised from the fight, but she knows they're both going to be OK. It's a moment that crystalizes everything for her, but in a much deeper way than the other times.

For him, he's always been a little soft for her--right from those early days in Ul'dah when she was a strange, sarcastic, impatient person out of her element and clearly keeping a multitude of secrets, but with a genuine kindness beneath it all.

19. Are they okay with public displays of affection? Do they like them?

Aur's not a fan of them. She hates the feeling of her emotional intimacy being perceived, especially by the larger public. If she's in a private place with trusted friends, then she's far more open--she and Thancred have a lot of small touches and gestures, a touch on the shoulder or the arm, slipping their hand into the other's, a kiss on the forehead. But if they're around people she doesn't know, all of that goes away.

29. What compromises are they making in their relationship?

There are a number of things they butt heads on or don't agree with. Sometimes these are small things (whose space is whose - Aur needs her space, maybe too much space, is it really necessary for her to have a whole room devoted to weapons???); sometimes these are larger disagreements (how best to support and help Ryne, they don't always agree on this parenting situation they've ended up in since neither of them know what they're doing they're idiots (affectionate) help them Urianger; religion is also a bit of a hot topic for them, but it's complicated by Endwalker's events and I don't think either of them are eager to bring it up and they're leaving it alone).

But they always try to make room for the other and respect each other's opinions, even when they disagree. This probably manifests most clearly in how independent they are. They both go off and do their own things, sometimes they don't see each other in person for months (even after they're married). But when push comes to shove they always have each other's backs. They support each other unconditionally.

[scalamore]

As a reminder, Rupelali's current relationship is extremely problematic

It pains me to say it because they're just so sweet together now, but it's easy to forget that their relationship/bond was started because of lies, deceit, secrets, and hidden intentions. My thoughts: Rupert was always the one in power in their dynamic.

In Ch 32, he was amused to see her so terrified and shaking in fear in front of him, and it was easy to tell how much she hated him. Yet she kept on repeating she wanted to become his -- and as a lonely person who had nothing (no friends, no family, no allies, no one who cared about him), that was an extremely enticing answer. He had absolutely nothing of his own, but someone willingly approached him and said they wanted to become his? It's exactly what he wanted. He had absolutely nothing, but at least he could own her. He just wanted someone by his side that belonged to him, and not inherited from his mother. He wanted someone who would be loyal to him only.

At the start, he was certain that he had no need to trust her. After all, if he trusted her, he didn't have to own her. He didn't believe that she would stay because she wanted to, so he has to own her. Because he doesn't believe her, and that's ok for him. Lari's deception worked, because even if Rupert doesn't trust her, he still owns her. He laughed at how she knew nothing about who he truly was, what he was planning to do, what he wanted to do to the Empire - yet insisted she wanted to be his. He didn't care that she was useful, he just wanted SOMEONE to be his ally. She was so desperate to protect her family, that she gave up her autonomy to him, and he thought it was a good exchange: she said she would belong to him, as long as he was in power - and he had full intent to stay in power until his death. (Ch 45) Lari will always belong to him.

---

Meanwhile, because Lari had experienced loneliness, she was able to see it clearly in Rupert and take advantage of it when she offered to become his. Even though Rupert knew she was sucking up to him, and it was obvious she was using him and trying to earn his favor, he allowed it anyways, because he craved human interaction that much. Both of them knew how fake Lari was. Both knew how Lari was taking advantage of him. Over time, Rupert grew to care for Lari, and would save her from harm under the excuse that she belonged to him. Lari as well- grew to care for Rupert the more she realized he wasn't a monster. Over time, after their shared experiences, they both genuinely grew feelings for each other.... but the issue of what their relationship is, is the problem:

Rupert became too dependent on Lari as his source of comfort and reassurance. He was ok with keeping up lies and secrets in order to have her stay in the palace. He knew that he couldn't stop her if she insisted she wanted to leave the palace, so he clung to the agreement that she would stay beside him since she belonged to him. So he kept on reminding her she was his maid, she belonged to him etc - thus making Lari think that he only saw her as something he owned, rather than her as a person (while he totally saw her a person this whole time). He trusted her, but was ok if she didn't completely trust him. It's ok if she betrayed him, he'll just get her back somehow. It's ok if she continues to lie to him, he'll accept those lies. If she wanted to continue to trick him, that's fine. She doesn't have to like him back. He'll willingly give her EVERYTHING. He'll do anything for her to stay by his side. --- Meanwhile, although Lari has grown and matured, and is a bit more open with Rupert and more trusting of him, she still wears a mask around him. She pretends that everything is alright. She's still hiding TL1 from him. She denies her own feelings for him. She still blindly trusts her family excessively despite her suspicions. She doesn't trust Rupert completely. All of this is because of her trauma and loneliness from TL1, and the betrayal of her friends and family during TL2.

Lari is trapped in the past, and she is unable to move on. Her time has stopped. Her own heart has been frozen since her regression. She feels guilty because of his affection. She's too scared to accept the reality that Rupert likes her. So she reasons it's not real affection, that it's because he unhealthily clings to her because he has no one else, and dismisses his feelings. She can't trust anyone anymore, and doesn't let herself trust anyone. She doesn't admit that she genuinely cares for him, because there's no way she and Rupert can be together. She think's she's not worthy of being by his side, that she's not good for him. She doesn't think she can ever separate the two ruperts. She can't move on from the fact that "Rupert" killed her, and has a chance of killing her in the future. She's too scared to accept the truth of her birth which so many characters have hinted at - she dismisses for a while. She's finally comfortable and happy at the palace with Rupert.... ignorance is bliss. She's finally able to relax and enjoy life... she's ok with living life with her mask on forever, keeping secrets, and keeping the status quo with Rupert as her master, and her as his maid. -- Overall, their relationship is extremely messy. Both sides have issues that they need to work on. Rupert needs to choose for himself what he wants to do as Emperor, and what Lari means to him.

Lari needs to move on from TL1

Most of the story was already spent on Lari helping Rupert heal from his trauma, so it's time for Rupert to do the same for Lari. He has to choose if he wants to approach her again (despite her begging him to forget her), and be the one to help her finally move on from her trauma of TL1, and to give meaning to HER life now. Because for them to be a couple, the two have to stop with the lies, take off their masks, and rely on each other as equals. It's no longer a relationship of master and maid, of victim and murderer, but now of "Rupert and Lari". It'll be one with mutual trust and open communication and for acceptance of the other - of both their good and bad points. No more lies, and no more secrets.

[writingsoftrash]

Alice In Mechaland Chapter One, Part IV Savior At The Eleventh Hour

Alice continued with out the slightest hint of discomfort, smiling as she took down her ponytail, and rolling her neck to stretch it, "If you'd like, I can get your clothes dry-cleaned tomorrow. I uh, might have some clothes for you to wear, but- they're probably not anything you'd want to work in, so- I can grab you some things. If... you want to stay that is." "I... am. I do - I think." he followed after her, "But you don't have to do that, I should have some units still stored in the bank-"

She laughed, shaking her head with a wry smile, "Uh, still working on that actually, friend. Getting the banks to unfreeze your accounts, and your agency to release you from your contract has been more of a hassle than getting the cops to free you. Ironic, because your agency was perfectly fine to let you rot in a jail cell or worse, but now that you're free... well. Those are the... other 'issues' I mentioned before. But- I promise, I'm working on it, and everything should be resolved soon, so, you don't need to worry!" He moved in front of her, pale green eyes looking over her, studying every inch of her face for any tell, any possible subtle note that could reveal to him what game was being played- "What is the catch?" he asked finally, head tilted as he looked at her carefully, "I know I asked you before, and you answered but there is always, a catch... I simply wish to know, so it does not catch me off guard." "There's no catch," she replied, giving a small indignant huff, "You need help. I want to give it. That's all there is to it, I'm afraid. I realize it's odd for a human to give a shit about you, and you're not wrong to mistrust my intentions. But- I do care. I have no intentions of tricking you, or stabbing you in the back- or worse. I'm sorry if it's so confusing... I just want to help you, you deserve to be treated just as any other man." Just as any other man-

"N-Now, if you don't mind... I am... quite tired," she said, offering an apologetic smile as she moved past him, "So I'm going to catch some z's, but I'll set my alarm for early. We can go grab you some clothes and drop off your suit at the dry cleaners. I've got some errands I need to run anyway, so does that work for you?" He nodded slowly, though made no attempt to turn and look at her- "Yes. Well, if I am still here in the morning, of course..." He paused, waiting for her answer, waiting for some sign- "...I hope you will be," she said softly, voice as unrelenting and without any trace of hidden motivation, "I know it's strange, and I know despite being programmed to trust humans, you're probably deep down wondering when the other shoe will drop. And you should be wary - especially after all you've been through. It's on me to show you that I don't mean you any ill will, trust is... earned, not given. But I do promise you, Joe. I just want to help. Really. I'm happy I was able to get to you before the worst happened." And then her door was closed gently - and he turned to look at where she had been standing, eyes gazing at the now empty spot before turning to look into the room she had offered up to him to rest his wires in. The moon was in the window, bright and shining unto him just as it had in the forest with David in what had seemed like a lifetime ago. Real. He wondered in the back of his brain, if the woman behind the closed door was real just as the moon was now - perhaps - under the light of this real moon, his troubles were truly over. The thought was odd - foreign to him even. From the moment of his inception, he knew what he was, what his purpose was, and the irrefutable fact that one day he would become obsolete and thrown away. He had told David as much, hadn't he? So why did he now feel an unfamiliar feeling settle into his wires - unable to name what exactly it was?

After a moment, he turned to walk into the room that would be his, settling down in the chair beside the neatly made bed- eyes looking up into the night sky outside the window.

He had much to think on.

Chapter One: Part I || Part II || Part III || Part IV Next Chapter Masterpost

[enamouredfae]

♡ Pick a Card ♡

Advice from your Spirit Guides!

This reading is for entertainment purposes only.

This is a timeless reading for the collective, therefore it is likely that some messages will not resonate with you. Please only take the messages that do! The messages that do not, are meant for somebody else. Remember that the future is never set in stone and that you possess free will! Love you! ♡

Pile 1

Charm: Shell

You may see shells as signs from the universe. You may have Venusian placements. You have a tough exterior, but once you finally open up to people you are a hidden gem! You are a person that values privacy.

Flower: Carnation

The meaning of carnation changes depending on its colour, since this one is a stripped purple carnation, it symbolizes rejection/refusal and capriciousness. It being a dry bud, for me at least, symbolizes that this is a small issue that isn't likely to grow! You might've been refused a caprice recently, or you may have too high expectations that are likely not going to be fulfilled.

Significator: Page of Cups

Self-sufficient is the word I thought of when I saw this card. I think that at the moment you are really starting to work through your emotions, you might be finally doing some introspection, journaling, talking to people, seeing a therapist, etc. You are beginning a journey of emotional growth. You might also be receiving a message soon, be aware of any symbols that matter to you or ask the universe for certain symbols for guidance.

Astro: Virgo and Capricorn

There is a high chance that you have Virgo or Capricorn placements. You may be earth dominant. You may be Mercury/Saturn dominant/ruled. This could also apply to the person you need advice on if that is the case.

I thought of soil when I saw these cards, not a plant, but very well-nourished soil. It seems like you are making a foundation for yourself that is not rooted in anyone else, it simply comes from you. You are the soil, the water, the nutrients, and your future self is the plant. Flower crowns may be significant to you as well, or you may find great healing by connecting with nature and connecting to nature's cycles.

What you need advice on:

VI of Wands and X of Pentacles (reversed)

There are a few possibilities I see here. You may be having a hard time getting your accomplishments noticed by others, you might not receive the praise you desire or feel you deserve. Another possibility is that you may have a hard time feeling successful due to your financial situation. You may have received a large sum of money that should make you happy, but it doesn't. You may be very well off financially, but it is causing some hardships, and others might not understand these hardships because they think that they'd be very happy in your position.

Advice:

King of Pentacles and XVIII. The Moon

I feel like at least one of you should monetize your intuition. Some of you have or will meet a person (very likely an earth placement), that is either a business partner or a lover/friend, that will somehow help you with your financial issue. They might recommend you to someone for example. Perhaps if you confide in the King of Pentacles, they'll help you immensely, they're someone you can rely on, if not financially, emotionally. Others should embody the King of Pentacles, be determined, stick to a routine. For others, someone could be hiding smth from you that would help you immensely with this issue. Listen to your intuition! Do not forget that your anxieties and fears are valid, and it is normal to be feeling like this! Your worth is not defined by your financial success!

38. Willow and 5. Cerato and Honeysuckle

Willow talks about self-responsibility: make a plan, stick to it and, most importantly, try to stop complaining. You have the strength to get through this, complaining just engrains it in your head that you have a problem making it harder to get out of that mindset, instead try working on the solution. Cerato talks about the fact that no matter how many people you ask, no matter how many books you read, your gut knows best! Trust yourself and your intuition. Whatever feels right, is! Just know that domestic happiness is very important right now, cherish whoever that may be (King of Pentacles perhaps), be it your cat or even yourself if you live alone, give and accept affection! This could be a message for a specific person but I feel called to note that as I was shuffling the oracles I started singing "Runaway" by Aurora. Perhaps the lyrics are meaningful to one of you, or it can reassure you that this pile is meant for you if this is your favorite song.

Pile 2

Charm: Cactus

You may see cacti as signs from the universe or have a very strong emotional attachment to them due to a certain memory. I feel like a lot of people are attracted to you, but they feel that you will reject or hurt them if they get too close. Or you consciously or subconsciously hurt people when they get too close. You might think you don't deserve love, which is NOT TRUE. Love isn't something that has to be deserved! But if it were, you most certainly deserve it!

Flower: Freesia

Yellow freesias symbolize joy, renewal, and friendship. It is the go-to flower to convey to someone that you trust them. You are incredibly trustworthy, someone to whom your loved ones come for advice. You are a great listener, are very delicate and tactful in your interactions with others.

Significator: IX. The Hermit

You are doing a lot of self-reflection right now, sometimes the pondering even turns into daydreams. You may also be connecting with and thinking about your spiritual/religious beliefs. You are looking to understand the light that illuminates your path. You may have started meditating, or you should start! Spiritual awakening is happening or coming soon! You could be isolating yourself at the moment as well.

Astro: Jupiter and Libra

There is a high chance that you have Libra or Sagittarius placements. You may be air dominant. You may be Jupiter/Venus dominant/ruled. This could also apply to the person you need advice on if that is the case.

The words that I kept thinking about at this point in the reading were "letting karma do its job" and "visions of the future". You may be clairvoyant! But most of you act a lot like the Justice tarot card, you like balance and fairness, and have a life philosophy based on these ideas. Your higher education might've played a big role in this.

What you need advice on:

II of Cups (reversed) and Queen of Swords

Someone may be rationalizing or overthinking a perceived imbalance in a relationship. Of course, the Queen of Swords, likely an air placement, is intelligent, they may be right in their thinking but because of the advice received, I believe their judgment is clouded by insecurity. They may feel unworthy of what they receive, seeing that you chose the cactus charm and have libra as an astro card, it is very likely that this is you but this may be your person as well, both options are possible.

Advice:

King of Cups and IV of Swords (reversed)

See, the King of Cups is upright, this person, very likely a water placement, is very emotionally mature, compassionate, and understanding. Whereas the swords person is exhausted and stagnant due to the deep contemplation happening. I feel they may also be insecure, causing the overthinking. If this is you, trust me, you deserve the King of Cups! If this is your person, make them realize that they deserve you! They need a lot of reassurance.

1. Agrimony and 7. Chestnut Bud and Morning Glory

Love, whether romantic or platonic, requires hard work, determination, and affection. Agrimony talks about a person that needs balance, both inside and outside. You may find it by showing more of yourself, especially by starting with your loved ones. Because you might not be used to it, start little by little, and observe how accepting those you love can be. Chestnut Bud talks about focus and learning from experience. For me, it's another confirmation that someone is overthinking, see the girl looking very melancholic, whereas their counterpart is goofing around. Don't take life too seriously! Have fun with your loved one!

Pile 3

Charm: Leaf

You might see certain trees or leaves as signs from the universe. When I picked up this charm I immediately thought "Leave!" So if you were thinking about a voyage, there's your sign, just be mindful of covid regulations, please. The idea of falling also popped up, so you might be falling for someone rn or feeling like you're in a perpetual fall emotionally.

Flower: Orchid

I would just like to point out that, although this orchid dried white, it was actually a baby purple orchid when alive. I will therefore explain both colors: purple orchids represent royalty, admiration, and respect, whereas white ones symbolize purity and innocence. But they are, no matter what color, always a symbol of luxury, delicate beauty, and virility.

Significator: 0. The Fool

You may be starting smth new with confidence, smth you haven't done before, making you a bit inexperienced, but still willing to take the leap of faith. OR you may be acting foolishly by looking back or the opposite way of the thing you'd do with confidence. Let me explain, as you can see the Astro cards are both looking in one direction, with determination, and confidence. Whereas The Fool is looking the opposite way. Your significator may be saying that you're being foolish to look the other way, wondering what-ifs.

Astro: Sagittarius and Mars

There is a high chance that you have Sagittarius, Aries, or Scorpio placements. You may be fire dominant. You may be Jupiter/Mars dominant/ruled. This could also apply to the person you need advice on if that is the case.

You have a clear goal that you can easily reach through your actions. Look at Mars' demeanor, he knows Sagittarius is hitting the target. Do not doubt yourself, there's nothing to worry about. Stay focused!

What you need advice on:

XI. Justice (reversed) and Queen of Cups

Clearly, there is a decision to be made here, and you really want to listen to your heart. And you're questioning whether you should? I just want to reassure you, the Queen of Cups is highly in tune with their intuition and their emotions, you should trust yourself.

Advice:

X of Swords (reversed) and II of Pentacles

You are clearly in pain, whether or not it is talking about this decision that is eating you up. Healing and recovery are important right now! It's time to stop resisting an inevitable end, and start recovering. Look, the reversal allows for the swords to just fall out of your back, just look inwards! Don't forget to balance work with fun, you deserve to relax! Another way to see this is that you are restricting yourself by seeing this as a choice, why not do both? Although, if we are talking about people here, there better be a mutual agreement on polygamy! I will not invite you to cheat! If we are talking about activities, you are capable of doing both if it's too hard to choose, you just need to figure out how to balance them. A specific message is that some of you want to go back to doing smth you've dreamt of doing as a child, if that is the case, pls do it, at least as a hobby!

13. Gorse and 32. Vine and Trumpet Gentian

There is a need to heal some inner wounds. I immediately thought of inner child work when I saw the Trumpet Gentian in combination with the Vine. Vine talks about acts of service and leadership skills, try parenting yourself/your inner child, give yourself the love that you may have lacked as a kid. You are worthy of it! Gorse is all about perspective and imagination. Do a brainstorming of possible outcomes depending on the decision you take, you can do this alone, but the input of loved ones that can be honest with you would do wonders. Don't forget your future can go in many different ways, and whichever decision you take is the right one!

Pile 4

Charm: Angel

You may see angels or angel numbers as signs from the universe. You are a person that is divinely guided and divinely protected. It seems to me like you have a very strong intuition or are very aware of your divine gifts.

Flower: Rose

Of course, roses are always symbolic of love. Therefore I believe it is more note-worthy here to talk about the size. This is a tiny rose. Just like the carnation bud, it did not have time to grow and is now immortalized in its youth stage. You may be inexperienced in love, or hold naive beliefs about it. You might be experiencing youthful romance right now.

Significator: XV. The Devil

What I find interesting here is that you got the angel charm with the devil significator. This is very conflicting energy. The sentence that I kept thinking throughout the reading is "wolf in sheep clothing" or "sheep in wolf's clothing", I kept mixing up the words, just very contradictory energy. The way you present yourself to the world is very different from how you truly are. You might also be a person prone to obsessing over people, things, interests, etc. I also would like to note here that this pile was the hardest to get the cards, the amount of shuffling I did here until the cards flew made me sweat hahaha. It's also a very confusing reading. Therefore, I believe you carry a lot of confusion yourself, although your intuition is incredibly powerful, you might suffer from being very paranoid, and sometimes being unable to differentiate your intuition from your delusions. I also think you're very secretive, you do not want people to know or understand you.

Astro: Neptune and Moon

There is a high chance that you have Pisces or Cancer placements. You may be water dominant. You may be Neptune/Moon dominant/ruled. You could have a Neptune/Moon aspect. This could also apply to the person you need advice on if that is the case.

"This is a time of great psychic sensitivity for you. Trust your intuition and follow its guidance." You should try to differentiate emotions from intuition, I know it's hard, but they are different things, and it's very important to tell them apart! Your dreams may hold messages, try having a dream journal and interpreting them if you don't do that already.

What you need advice on:

IX of Wands (reversed) and V of Swords (reversed)

As you can see ALL of the tarot cards I've received in this reading are reversed, implying inner conflicts that require inner change/work. You might've said/done smth you now regret, and you hate yourself for it, you may also be incredibly paranoid that others will find out. You want the paranoia to end. You want to make amends, to reconciliate/atone, but are unsure on whether you should do it. Perhaps you don't feel emotionally prepared to reopen that wound.

Advice:

V. The Hierophant (reversed) and VII of Wands (reversed)

What I noticed here is that The Hierophant mirrors The Devil, not as perfectly as The Lovers, but it is incredibly similar. Once again that energy of opposition, contradiction, and confusion appears, "the wolf in sheep's clothing". For some, my fixation on this phrase could be a warning. For others an invitation to look in the mirror... Try looking at the situation from the other person's point of view! I'm not saying you are a "wolf in sheep's clothing", but that might be how you're being perceived. You are exhausted, remorse is eating up all of your energy. The Hierophant is saying that you should stay true to your personal beliefs, so if you believe apologizing is necessary to move on, do it!

This could be unrelated and for a specific person, but don't be afraid of challenging the status quo! If it hurts none, do as you will, embody your true self! I just want to remind you that going against your loved one's idea of "normalcy" is not hurting them, it's loving yourself. But remember that you also don't owe anyone a "coming out", you are valid whether or not you tell people! Do whatever your heart tells you and please be safe!

!!! : Of course, this doesn't count if what's challenging the status quo doesn't respect others' identity/ sexuality/ ethnicity/ religion/ etc. If challenging the status quo comes from a place of hate please block me. Nobody is using this reading as a sign to do some fucked up shit.

3. Beech and 2. Aspen and Lily

When I saw Beech I immediately thought "talk to someone, or you could spiral." Beech talks about self-acceptance and self-compassion. You must first accept yourself as you are, an imperfect human being, like all humans, before starting to work on embodying your highest self. Stay open-minded! Aspen, on the other hand, invites you to connect with others, not only for advice or consoling but for quality time! I have a feeling that you have very high morals, but having them isn't enough, you must act accordingly!

Thank you for reading! Love you all.♡

You can buy me a coffee if you feel called to do so! This is never necessary, but always appreciated! ♡

[maskyartist]

*kicks door down, scatters my Augustus thoughts everywhere* PSPSPSPPSPSPSPSPSPSPS AUGUSTUS AQUATO STANS CMERE I GOT CONTENT FOR U

to make a long story short, it's 5am and im vibrating with these disjointed ideas i got for Augustus' mindscape so yall get to hear me ramble about it :D it probably wont make much sense? but these are super rough concepts that im just puttin down to see how i vibe with it (and maybe get feedback if yall end up throwin asks my way just sayin just sayin i will ramble MORE if u enable me and i'll do it for FREE)

so yeah enjoy my nonsensical ramblings about the only man i'd trust with my drink ever

a quick note, all of this is post-Psychonauts 2 so expect spoilers :D

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okay so i dont have a catchy name for Augustus's mental world just yet but im considering "Augustus' Anomalies" or somethin i'll get back on that anyways-

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i so badly want Augustus's mind to be a walk down memory lane. the whole place is like extreme platforming, think those super hard final levels in mario or somethin, so yeah this is Raz's home here he's gettin all over the place so easy. the idea is that the further you get, the more you find his repressed memories and feelings, things he's pushed down until he's forgotten so he doesn't need to face them. he doesnt have time for that with 5 kids, his wife, and his Nona around! he's a busy man!

but now? after everything? he only has time to think on his hands. and it's making it much harder to keep it all down, especially since he's just started remembering everything.

in comes Raz (and probably a few others. maybe the family too? or just Trouble Trio i aint sure) offering to do a mental wellness check on his dear ol dad, to clean up a bit and help him think a bit clearer

and to everyones shock, Augustus agrees, offering his mind for Razputin to explore as he pleases. when he's asked he just smiles. it's sad and tired.

"I don't want to hide things." he admits with a shake of his head. "Not after so much was hidden from me. My son deserves better."

so into the mental world we go! :D

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we start in front of a small blue tent, similar to Raz starting in a dark room with just the Caravan in front of him when he explored his own mind, and going through reveals a whole new world. its full of bright lights and colorful displays, rides and games and everything you'd expect to see at a circus. a properly funded circus at least.

however, that's below you. in actuality, you've spawned on a rather narrow platform with a tightrope in front of you leading to Mental Augustus who sits atop it with little issue. talking to him reveals that he's not...entirely "all there". he's still very much Augustus, but there's parts of him missing. in terms of design, he's completely monochromed (and maybe wearing a mask he cant take off? im futzin as we speak) and to bring him back to full color you gotta find these missing parts of him.

there's three parts missing, kinda similar to Cassie's level. but unlike Cassie's level, these arent archetypes that Augustus needs back. they're memories he genuinely can't find on his own. the ones that were either repressed by the Astralathe or by Augsutus's own subconscious to prevent him from feeling more hurt then he already is.

the missing parts are

- Happiness

- Anger

and - Sadness

at least so far. im still feelin it out.

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each section is held in it's own large looking tent that is slowly leading to a Big Top in the center. the level is made up of two sections, a "ground area" with concession stands and a bunch of figments and some mental constructs of people like his family, random carnies he's met when he was in Grulovia, and even some of the psychonauts :D only Milla, Sasha, and Oleander tho. they're the only ones that are important to him atm.

(Milla and Sasha are viewed rather nicely while Oleander seems to be getting the cold shoulder so....Augustus isn't over the whole "trying to kill my son and making him sneeze out his brain" thing quite yet)

the other part is a "sky area" or rather an area that's entirely off the ground, with tight jumps and carefully placed tightropes and trapeze placed all over to get around. on the ground you'll find the Emotional Baggage while in the air you'll find their Tags (to show that Augustus would rather repress his emotions then fully recognize them and accept them yknow?)

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first area's Happiness. the tent is seemingly from the early years of the Flying Aquato's Circus, very well made and well decorated as you head inside. there's a performance going on and your job is to help it move along smoothly since it seems they're missing a few people...

you help set up some balance balls, tie together some tightropes, and adjust the spotlights while the show goes on under you. once everything's in place, the show finishes with a human pyramid which is topped by a young Augustus colored yellow. he smiles all broad and gap-toothed and waves at you until you jump on and land on his hands to finish the show properly

(if you look close, you can see the Gzar and a young Gristol watching the show from these theater seats. they look out of place in the tent, as if they're too....nice looking to be there. but they're there, and they look bored as hell.)

once it's over, Happiness (as we'll call him) goes over to Raz and asks him to take him back now. the show's over, after all! he can't just stay here forever when there's so much more to see! like Bob's Bottles you end up essentially teleporting back to the tightrope the Mental Augustus is still sat at. Happiness essentially tackles Augustus and the man laughs before hugging the young version of himself. a bit cautiously but it gets easier once he actually commits to it. Happiness melts away and Augustus gains some color, but not all of it.

first area complete :D

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aaaand thats all i got rn. unfortunately. this is a super rough idea rn, and it'll be polished a lot before im satisfied with it in some kinda way, but i have a lot of thoughts

so tldr ; Augustus' mind is about digging up old repressed memories, good bad and ugly, and learning to accept them as part of you. even if they hurt, it's worse to ignore it all and let it simmer.

i also would like Maligugustus to be a final boss? but idk m thinkin.

if yall actually read all this im very impressed???? and if u have thoughts on this stuff definitely send em my way cause i have ideas for the Second and Third area and THATS where the angst is gonna hit i assure u

...anyways imma go get some sleep

[imthepunchlord]

Hello! I just finished reading A Declaration of Love from your Always a Hero, No Matter the Miraculous (Adrienette centered) AO3 collection, and I was wondering how you think Marinette would fair with the canon Peacock Miraculous and Duusu as well as how Adrien would fair with the canon Fox Miraculous and Trixx starting from Origins, factoring in not only the powers but also the kwamis’ canon personalities as we’ve seen them (for Duusu, that includes how she acts when her Miraculous is fixed). Also, I want to take a minute and thank you for leaving those stories up even after canon has gone way downhill with the LS and everything else; it’s nice to go back to simpler times once in a while when we were all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed at ML’s potential 😆😌

Admittedly, I did consider deleting those as I don't enjoy Adrienette anymore. But decided against it, knowing I do have readers that still enjoy them and it didn'tfeel right to act on the salt and dislike. I can't ever go back to rereading them, but others can.

Now canon wise, with an updated set up:

Adrien with Fox would be very similar to Alya but not as good. Being 85% charge in and react, think later, he wouldn't be a good Fox at all. Largely would need direction for elaborate illusions but anything on his own eould be basic and straightforward. Adrien and Trixx I see being similar to Adrien and Plagg, Trixx would feel for him and urge Adrien to be more independent, selfish, more free, and Adrien is all for Trixx's playfulness. Actually inspires Adrien to get into music more (which leads to him and Nino being closer). Only big issue is when Trixx tries to guide/teach Adrien something, it goes over Adrien’s head. Trixx likes to be vague, set it up for their humans to make them think on their own. Adrien does not do vague. Trixx would take advantage of this to mess with him a little and tease Adrien for not listening well or being too reckless.

Marinette would be a good Peafowl, though it's a given as a miraculous prodigy and this is another miraculous of creation. She's actually a lot better over all with this than the actual miraculous of creation. Thanks to it's canon power, she doesn't even need to stress to physically be at fights, she's able to make elaborate and complex enough beings that she can make a "Ladybug" to solve the issue on it's own. It's the biggest reason Fu released Peafowl, keeping the actual LB miraculous safe and hidden. Even if HM finds out he's not facing the actual LB and is able to destroy it, Marinette is able to make another with improvements. She's happier mentally, emotionally, and physically as it's a lot less pressure and she trusts her creations to do their tasks well. It also leaves HM in a stalemate that now isn't only in his hands, as Marinette now doesn't have much reason to physically go out as Bluebird.

Marinette and Duusu get along very well. Marinette works off Duusu's energy and positivity well. It's also a big plus that Duusu is very conscious and considerate to her humans, here to help in anyway she can if they're upset or struggling. Duusu also adores that Marinette will make her hats, food, and is getting pampered with so much love, she loves it.

Partnership wise, it's pretty nonexistent. Adrien COULD have a superficial crush on Bluebird as Sentibug would think highly of her creator and build her up in his imagination, or he may no have feelings on the mysterious Bluebird at all. Marinette over all is fond of Vuldonis, encountering him here and there from close calls, but also thinks he's a little too cocky. At the end of the day, he serves his purpose making chaos if Sentibug needs help, though Marinette does think a better Fox could have been picked.

Honestly though, if there's to be a 2nd go working off canon, I wouldn't have Adrien picked at all for either. Keep him a temp hero using Turtle at most. Marinette could use either, and I'd say gave Felix, Luka, or Nino as her partner. Equally, they could pull off either as well.