#heard those specific lyrics and thought ‘yep its them’

[just-call-mefr1es]

“see the sun, i see the sun, it’s over.”

song: Workers by Hop Along

fic: Taking What’s Not Yours by @staggersz

[casper-has-a-cat]

AJR appreciation post

because i don’t think enough people have heard neotheater.  some background, their previous album, the click, is a masterpiece in its own right, it came out when i was in college and it captured all of my college feels, not to mention the song about the office (yes, the tv show) which had me genuinely laughing aloud.   but this post will focus on neotheater, because i’ve only just recently finished college and this album perfectly captures new-to-the-real-world feels.

like this album has made me cry so much and in the best ways, it’s been the biggest reassurance because i’ve been on my own for a month and a half now and hearing people that i respect articulating everything surround the fears and pain and sadness of growing up is as heartbreaking as it is comforting.  i’m not the only one who is filled with doubts and uncertainty and having those feelings doesn’t make me a failure, thank goodness.  thank goodness someone put that into music because now i can hear it whenever i need it.

and let me just say, this album has an odd sound.  even for ajr, it’s odd.  it’s extremely theatrical sounding, and that’s not so much my style of music, so at first i was iffy on it, but... it directly ties in to the meaning of the songs and the story that the album as a whole is telling.  the idea of feeling as though you’re being judged and watched and that everyone has expectations for you whether you want an audience or not.  it was a brave move and adds to the authenticity of the album.

so, let’s get on to more specifics!

lyrics that make me cry:

“i wanna be next up forever, find a way to never hit my peak” - next up forever (these made me cry on the first listen, because like, i know they’re talking about music, but that’s such a big mood post-college)

“you’ll sail the ocean finding where you should be.  and if you’re broken, you’ll find your own thing” - next up forever.  there's???  so much in these two lines???  like the idea that life is just one big search is huge, its releases so much stress surrounding the feeling that you should know where you should be as soon as you graduate.  and the second part?  that reassurance that you’ll figure it out, even if you don’t fit, it’s so good

“i wanna move out, i don’t wanna move on” + “i’ll come by when i’m grown, it won’t be the same though, i can’t even go home” - don’t throw out my legos.  honestly the whole song just hits me hard if i’m in the mood.  the profound sadness that comes with growing up and going out on your own is so well articulated in this song, and the metaphor of like.  wanting to keep insignificant things around because if you do, then maybe your younger self can still stick around too.  and then this idea of not having a home, i didn’t even realize it until i heard this but that’s maybe the most painful thing that i’m dealing with right now.  because it takes time to make a home

“you say that i'm better, why don't i feel better? the universe works in mysterious ways, but I'm starting to think it ain't working for me. doctor, should I be good, should I be good this year?” - karma.  i have so much to say about this song and i could’ve included a much longer quote here but this gets the point across.  i think anyone who’s struggled with mental health can probably relate to this.  and i love that it’s (imo) very clearly not dismissing counseling- they’re being honest in that counseling is not a magic solution, it takes work and sometimes it doesn’t seem to be working as well as we want it to, even if we do still see value in it.  and the transition right here, at the end of the song, from the “i’ve been so good this year” to the question - should i even be good this year if it’s not making me feel better?  that’s what really got me.

“dear winter, don’t move too far away.” + “will we still hang out and talk when i’m no longer in charge?” - dear winter.  this song makes me cry every time i hear it no lie.  apparently when ryan (the lyricist) played it for his brother for the first time, his brother also sobbed so i guess it only makes sense.  but yeah this specific verse kills me a lot because this is exactly where i’m at right now.  i moved too far away.  i hate how painful that is for my parents.  i had to do it but it still hurts every time i hear this.

“they wanted heaven from me, i gave ‘em hell.  now they want something bigger, i’m overwhelmed” - finale.  this lyric is preceded by 4 repetitions of the line “they wanted,” and the first two times it’s sung in a deep tone, but the third and fourth times it’s sung in a higher tone, and the singer sounds more energetic and maybe even high-strung, it’s like he’s rejecting “their” opinion.  and then you get this lyric about heaven and hell and you see that he did something unexpected, he’s decided not to be “their” version of perfect and done something that “they” didn’t want, and maybe he thought he’d be free from “them” after that, but it turns out just the opposite happened.  

“just don’t forget about me when you get out of college” - finale.  it’s such a good double meaning.  it’s playing off of them being scared that they’re music will lose popularity when their audience graduates, but it’s also like... talking to college friends.  don’t forget about me.  and also the world?  and this is where things get complex with the idea of having an audience.  on one hand the expectations are oppressive and confining, but at least someone’s watching as we grow up, but when we graduate it does feel a bit like society no longer cares about us so much.  at least, it did for me.  so i guess this line could have a triple meaning?

lyrics that make me laugh:

“thank you for coming to my birthday party, i am one minute old today” - birthday party.  honestly, every lyric in this song makes me laugh, it’s just such a fucking hilarious song, and like, dark humor all the way???  but this specific lyric is said in such a funny way i love it.  i actually can’t think of any other song that’s made me laugh so hard.

“what doesn’t kill you makes you ugly, life gives you lemons, at least it gave you something” - break my face.  there’s a whole aspect of this song that’s really tongue-in-cheek.  like it’s funny because they’re taking an idiom and really looking it in the eyes and being candid, like okay let’s stop sugarcoating things, what doesn’t kill you might not make you stronger but it’ll make you ugly!  but then the song as a whole can totally be read as a satire on people who are so critical of anyone who complains, or those people who are always like “look on the bright side” and “why can’t you just be happy!” and anyway it’s so genius

extra notes:

100 bad days hasn't made me laugh or cry aloud but it’s still such an important song imo.  “a hundred bad days made a hundred good stories, a hundred bad days made me interesting at parties, no i ain’t scared of you, no i ain’t scared of you no more” it’s such a powerful mantra to keep in mind when things get rough.  idk if that last part was meant for this, but as someone with social anxiety and probably agoraphobia, it’s just been really empowering

turning out pt. ii... i don’t personally relate to this song as much as most of the others, and yet it still makes me profoundly sad.  honestly i don’t like listening to it because of that?  but also it kind of... doesn’t feel as clever to me as the other songs.  like i could’ve written those lyrics.  which is something i rarely feel about ajr songs.  idk, maybe it’s better if you relate more! and i’m biased probably because of how much i loved and related tot turning out pt. i and this wasn’t what i expected.

the entertainment’s here articulates something that scares me a lot?  how easy technology makes it to ignore real life, how tempting it is to just watch netflix or youtube videos or whatever.  so i avoid this song a bit as well.  i think it’s clever as hell, but it scares me and i’m a coward

beats: i’m just gonna say it, it’s my least favorite song on the album.  the idea is funny but to me the implementation isn’t the best?  it’s not that clever imo?  it’s very repetitive and i think that was supposed to like, go along with the meaning of the song, of echoing and doing what others are doing for success, but for me it’s just ultimately kinda... meh.

wow, i’m not crazy: kinda like 100 bad days, hasn’t made me laugh or cry aloud but this song is really important to me.  it makes me happy.  the idea of finding people who are crazy in the same way you are, and how that can make you love yourself so much more.  i love that.

okay yep we stop here!  honestly there are more lyrics that i love but this is an essay already sooooo.  yeah.  i love this album.

[gruntydiecast]

Casting Call: Vector W8

First off, I’d like to apologize for the fact that I’ve not been updating my Tumblr lately. I’ve been busy at work and haven’t had time to write something. To make up for this... I’m writing quite possibly one of my longest posts yet.

By popular demand, this is the casting you chose on Instagram for me to document: the Vector W8. Grab some popcorn, a drink or some music... and enjoy the read. This is also in some ways a car that time forgot, but it’s not a concept car... but I can break the rules because I made them.

When it comes to cars of the ‘80s, there is a debate as to what the best car of the era was. Many say it would be either the Lamborghini Countach or the Ferrari Testarossa. But I have something that is neither of those things. Today, we’re going to take a trip down memory lane and explore the car that attempted to elevate a small company to the dizzying heights of the supercar realm. This... is the Vector W8.

First, here’s a bit of background. The W8 was manufactured by a company known as Vector Motors, then known as Vector Aeromotive. The company was founded in 1971 as Vehicle Design Force by Gerald “Jerry” Wiegert in Wilmington, California; we’ll get to the full history of Vector in a post in the near future because it is honestly very interesting.

In essence, the W8 was a highly refined version of the Vector W2, one of the company’s initial prototypes (the “W” in the name stood for “Wiegert”). Wiegert wanted to put the W2 into production, but an economical downturn prevented him from doing so. However, by the ‘80s, Wiegert had eventually secured enough capital through public stock offerings and even various lawsuits, allowing him to chase his dream: to build his ultimate sports car, designed and built by his own company.

Design inspiration for the W8 (and by extension the W2) came from this green car: the Alfa Romeo Carabo (Hot Wheels actually did a model of this way back when). Its sleek, futuristic and aerodynamic design was perfect for Wiegert, especially with the aerospace theme the company was going for in the ‘80s.

Combining the sleek looks of the Carabo with the geometry and technology of fighter jets of the time like the F-15 Eagle, F-16 Fighting Falcon and F/A-18 Hornet, Wiegert and chief designer David Kostka set out to create what would be quite possibly the most insane supercar of the ‘80s, and probably still is now: the Vector W8. The term “Aeromotive Engineering” was used to describe the process of manufacturing this car, for the car used the newest and most advanced aerospace materials when manufacturing the W8.

The car passed the mandatory DOT crash tests and emissions tests. It used a semi-aluminum monocoque chassis which was epoxy bonded and riveted using 5000 aircraft-specification rivets with an aluminum honeycomb floorpan. The body was made mainly of carbon fiber and Kevlar. The car featured scissor doors, like a Lamborghini.

The beating heart of the W8 was this: a highly-modified aluminum resleevable 6.0L Rodeck twin-turbocharged racing V8 with variable boost pressure. The engine produced 625 horsepower and made 649 lb⋅ft (880 N⋅m) of torque at 4,900 rpm at 8 psi of boost pressure, and as if the Rodeck V8 couldn’t get any more ridiculous, it featured TRW forged pistons, Carrillo stainless steel connecting rods, stainless steel valves and roller rocker arms, a forged crank, a dry-sump oiling system with three separate filters and braided stainless steel hoses with anodized red and blue fittings. This engine sounded mad; click here to hear a Vector starting up and revving.

Yes, you heard that correctly; variable boost. The boost for both turbochargers was adjustable from 8 to 14 psi through a dial in the interior. And speaking of which, let’s talk about that next; because, if you thought the engine was already mad enough, the interior is on a whole other level.

As you can see, the interior of the W8 is mad. Fighter jet-inspired screen? Check. A million buttons everywhere? Check. Gauges? ...no check. And hang on... is that what I think it is? A Turbo-Hydramatic 425 transmission?

Yep, that’s right, and that just makes the car a lot more insane; this ridiculously powerful 6.0L Rodeck V8 was mated to a 3-speed Turbo-Hydramatic 425 automatic transmission. Next to it on the right was the handbrake, sort of shaped like the throttle on a fighter jet. Due to the placement of the transmission and the handbrake, the driver side doorsill is very, very wide, making it a bit tough for the driver to get in and out of the car. You will also notice that there are buttons on top of the gear stick. I’ll get to those now.

As if this car couldn’t get any more ridiculous. This is the screen of the Vector W8, with four different settings (controlled with those four buttons), marked “Main”, “Performance”, “Performance” again and “Chassis”. This is the “Main” screen, showing the odometer, fuel gauge, speedometer and tachometer.

This is the first “Performance” screen, showing engine temperature, oil pressure and temperature, the tachometer reading and various other metrics.

The third screen was the second “Performance” screen, showing the transmission pressure (because it had a torque converter) and transmission temperature as well as battery voltage.

The last screen was the “Chassis” screen, which showed a picture of the W8 which updated in real time when a door was opened, when the engine compartment was opened and so on.

On the other side, you will notice that the W8 doesn’t actually have a partition between the driver and passenger side footwells. So it is a little awkward. This car also has no glovebox; in its place is a... CD changer?

Yes, that’s right. The car came with an in-car stereo... and a Sony CDX-A2001 ten-disc CD changer which graced the entire right side of the car’s already insane instrument panel. This was a nice innovation, although it did came with one drawback; no passenger-side airbags. Good luck if you get into a crash riding shotgun.

Back to the interior though. It was upholstered in premium leather and suede, with electrically adjustable leather Recaro seats and featured a premium air-conditioning system. Some driving amenities such as power steering were excluded. The seating position for the driver was made slightly towards the center for better drivability.

The rear of the W8 was dominated by lines, and the rear sightline... wasn’t very good, mainly because of that gigantic wing. The license plate holder is located on the left and apparently may have been an afterthought. “TWINTURBO” is seen gracing the back.

The car also features a trunk which is just behind the engine.

As for the front... oh, right, the headlamps. They’re not pop-up... they’re pop-DOWN.

The car also has a storage cubby up front, although really, it wasn’t much.

Also gracing the front were windshield wipers, as you would expect on practically every other car. However, there wasn’t just one, nor was there just two: there were THREE. A moonroof was also standard. It also had sliding side windows like a race car, as well as power-adjustable side mirrors.

The logo on the side of the car was the only thing that really gave any indication as to what manufacturer it was.

The car had unique six-spoke “turbine” wheels fitted to Michelin XGT Plus tires; the car used 255/45ZR-16s in the front and very, very strange 315/40ZR-16s in rear. These wheels were apparently of a bespoke design made to the driver’s specifications. 

In terms of suspension, the W8 featured double A-arms up front and De Dion tube suspension at the rear, located by four trailing arms that stretched all the way forward to the firewall. The W8 used 13-inch vented disc brakes with Alcon aluminum 4-piston calipers.

In terms of performance, the Vector shined; it claimed to be able to do 389 km/h (242 mph) and a 0-60 mph (0-97 km/h) time of 3.9 seconds. These numbers were never officially tested, but if true, these are very impressive numbers for the time. Okay, enough about the W8’s performance and figures; let’s get to the part you’ve been waiting for, the history.

The W8 was first introduced in 1988 with a sticker price of about $185,000, priced within striking range of European competitors like the Lamborghini Diablo.

One high profile owner of a W8 was this man: Andre Agassi, although he ended up giving the car a bit of a bad rap. Agassi had insisted that his car be delivered before it was fully prepared; Vector agreed to this on the condition that Agassi not drive it and keep it in storage as the car was adjusted for the various emissions regulations in place. Agassi did not listen and drove it and ended up burning the rear carpeting due to an overly hot exhaust system; Agassi ended up requesting for a refund, which was ultimately granted. I’ll let you decide who’s at fault here.

Car And Driver magazine also tested the W8, but couldn’t complete testing because all three cars they were sent somehow managed to break down in different ways, leading to even more bad publicity. However, not all is bad as Road and Track magazine waxed lyrical about the Vector, praising practically every aspect of the W8’s performance.

Vector was still going strong in 1993, selling W8s; however, Wiegert was already planning for a successor. That successor was to be known as the AWX-3, better known as the WX-3 (Hot Wheels also made a model of this one too), where the name stood for Avtech Wiegert eXperimental, 3rd generation.

I’ll get into more details of the WX-3 in a later blog when I receive my WX-3 from the United States. Production of the W8 ultimately came to a halt in 1993 as Wiegert attempted to put the WX-3 into production; however, as the company was engaged in a hostile takeover by a Bermuda-based Indonesian company known as MegaTech, production never resumed and Vector entered a sharp decline. I’ll get into the rest of that history in another post.

In total, twenty-two cars were produced; seventeen of which were customer cars and five of which were prototypes. The car is now worth over $1 million today; so, if for some reason you ever see a car that looks like this on the roads, drop everything and take as many pictures as you can, because you have just seen one of only twenty-two Vector W8s. Okay, now that we’ve gotten all that out of the way, let’s get to the reason why you’re here.

This... is the Hot Wheels version of the Vector W8. Named the Vector W8 Twinturbo in the Hot Wheels lineup, this casting was first introduced in the 2012 HW Boulevard series in the Ahead Of Its Time sub-series. This casting was designed by Manson Cheung.

The base of the W8 features no mention of “Vector” anywhere; instead, just the SKU is displayed: W4831.

The sides feature the text “VECTOR W8 TWINTURBO” and nothing else. Black lines streak across the back to represent the engine cover.

The rear fascia is nice, although my only real gripe is a lack of rear detail apart from the engine cover.

The front fascia is also well done, with “VECTOR” and “TWIN TURBO” on the windshield, although a lack of detail on the body apart from the side reflectors leaves me wanting more. The interior is painfully cramped so I can’t get any good photographs, but what I see are the Turbo-Hydramatic shift lever, the steering wheel, seats and molded pedals (those pedals are part of the base). The distinctive screen and CD changer are absent from the instrument panel, but of course, you can’t have everything.

Folks, I believe you may have heard of the term “One-Hit Wonder” before. This is exactly an example of that; the W8 only saw one release in the HW Boulevard series and has not been seen since. As a result, prices for the Vector have been steadily climbing on eBay and I don’t see them going down for some time; why don’t you take a look for yourself?

I hope this long writeup has given you a better idea on this turbocharged thrasher, and what is quite possibly my new favorite supercar from the ‘80s; step aside, Lamborghini Countach. As usual, I’d do something like this any day.

This article is the first in a three-part series I will call The Vector Saga. The series will document the W8, the WX-3, and the history of Vector Motors as a whole.

[cowboylikedean]

FIRST THOUGHTS

Okay everyone welcome to my Lover first thoughts!!!

Overall: I love this album. It isn’t what I expected at first, I was expecting something stripped an acoustic but it is what I hoped for. If I wasn’t going to have stripped and acoustic, I wanted something Bubblegum in the modern way Carly Rae Jepsen is and guess what? I got an album that sounds like my FAVORITE parts of EMOTION from nearly top to bottom. This album is a lot so it’s gonna take a while fo me to digest, but I adore it. It’s already up there with Speak Now, Red, and reputation in my top tier. 

Below is my track by track

I Forgot That You Existed: I’ve seen people skip over this one but honestly? I needed it. I don’t know who she’s talking about, she lost a lot of friends summer 2016. But I am singing about that jackass who up and left my life and took me for several hundred dollars and then laughed as his asshole boyfriend posted a long ass blog post lying about me, misgendering me for sport, and making fun of me all while laughing about how he’s “not nice” (and being proud of that) when even HIS FOLLOWERS called him out for being cruel. I had that moment where I forgot that he existed and it was so freeing. This is gonna be one of my most listened to.

Cruel Summer: This song. Holy wow. Like talk about bridge city I guess lmao! Nah but it’s a vibe. and the chorus is so exciting and like I mentioned Carly Rae Jepsen and like THE CHORUS CAN’T  YOU HEAR HER???? I love this theme all over this album about falling into a relationship with someone in the midst of something hard or pushing through something difficult with someone. Cruel Summer is the first instance of this in this album and I’m going to need more time with the lyrics… There’s little things that I’m gonna need more time with… But I adore this vibe where she’s like telling the other side of Getaway Car. In Getaway Car we learned that you can’t run away from your problems, it doesn’t end well. In Cruel Summer we find her release in doing so. We find how that release of running away was what she needed to find herself and stability again. We find that without her past, she could never have arrived so wondrously and brutally, by design or some violent, exquisite happenstance… here.

Lover: Instant fave the second I heard it. Best love song she’s ever written and I 100% understand why she named the album Lover. This track is beautiful and the slower tempo doesn’t in any way detract from the sheer joy and excitement expressed in the song. It’s a public declaration of a private love in the most excited way and I get it. Also I did get some acoustic singer songwriter on this album!!

The Man: DID I HEAR TAYLOR SAY BITCH TWICE?!?!??!? also fuck she’s right. and I GUESSED HOW THE LYRICS WE HAD WOULD SOUND AND I WAS RIGHT i felt like a bomb when that happened. hahah tbh though, not my fave. Don’t get me wrong, far from the worst but just kind middle of the road to me. Also I think it’s the breakdown after the chorus that pushes it towards the middle to me. But again… Bridge city. The bridge is by far the best part of this song. 

The Archer: I still think this is my favorite song on the album. It has already helped me so much and I think Taylor and I feel depression, anxiety, and other stuff very similarly. Basically everything she’s released about it has highly resonated with me. I have so much to say about this song and its impact on me but I don’t think if I said all of that it would be much relevant to this post. Basically, I never grew up it’s getting so old. This song helps me grow up.

I Think He Knows: This song is so fucking fun and cute I jive and the chorus again I feel the Carly Rae vibes… I also love “bless my soul” like that’s such a great lyric. This is another one I feel is middle of the road for this album though. Like as a pop song, it’s top rate. As this album, it’s middle of the road. I’m happy to hear the vocoder again though! 

Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince: So I love this song. Everyone loves this song but I love this song both as its political commentary and just a commentary on depression in general. Like as a song about the specific depression and disappointment that struck us all after the 2016 election, it’s nearly flawless. As a song about disappointment and depression in general, it’s nearly flawless. I really love both readings but in the later, I really love the line “they whisper in the hallway she’s a bad bad girl” because in this reading, I like to see that about Taylor and how she is Miss Americana and the heartbreak prince. idk I think the fact that this song can work in both contexts’ and have completely separate meanings speaks to the strength of the songwriting. I’m so impressed. She hit it out of the park with this one.

Paper Rings: OKAY SECOND FAVORITE/TIED WITH FAVORITE HAPPY LOVE SONG WOW WOWOWOWOW The Last Kiss reference, the vibe that sounds like a teen movie when the kids break out and are running wild and free, idk why but I love “The moon is high just like your friends when we first met” it’s just so…. vivid. You cannot miss the feeling of freedom. This song is about finding freedom in love. Falling in love is the most exciting and free feeling in the world, whether that is romantic love or not and this song captures that feeling when you get to that ledge and you just….. slip. And the best part is it works for everything. Like idk I’ve always been able to take the feeling a song presents and take it out of its specific context and apply it to another instance of that feeling so I can easily take this song about the freely falling in love and look around and find hundreds of applications. Every time you love something or someone to the point where you don’t need anything else than what they give you to feel whole and complete, this song is there in the background reminding you that you do in fact like shiny things, but you don’t need them. Because this thing or person is all you need. LIKE STOP IT’S SO GOOD also 100% if she sang it with a country accent, it’d be a country hit. It sounds so much like Sam Hunt I cannot even, i have died.

Cornelia Street: The ROOFFKLJDSLKFJKSLDJFKLSDJLKFJLKSDF also like I am here for the storytelling songwriting so much. This is another one I need more time with but I think it’s already a classic. Again, it’s so nice to here something other than “I love you and everything is great” I mean it is like that but it’s the fear of being forced to say goodbye and how that would feel. It’s knowing you’ve gone all in and there’s no turning back. I see this song so beautiful contrasted with All Too Well. All Too Well focuses on a heartbreak that only time could help, but it seemed like time wouldn’t. It takes you through the beginning, middle, and end of that relationship and explains why it hurts so much. Cornelia Street takes us through this relationship, especially the beginning, and explains why this would be a heartbreak time couldn’t fix. It’s so vulnerable and honest in some really beautiful and profound ways.

Death by a Thousand Cuts: Okay so first of all, I would ADORE this song if that very low bass and synths weren’t there. I don’t know why they’re there but it muddles they for me and I can’t focus on anything because it’s like everything else is covered in a thick layer of mud trying to move around. Second I have no idea who or what this song was written about but it’s jarring to hear a breakup song on this album. I love asking the traffic lights if it will be okay and them saying “I don’t know.” Like that’s honestly incredible writing. We’ve all had those times when we’re hurting or scared and we’re in the car and we’re looking for a sign it will be okay but we have nothing. Also I need more time with the second verse. There’s so much there, I haven’t had time yet to process.

London Boy: “But God, I Love the English.” Yep you got a TYPE GIRL!! this song is so fun!! it’s so bragging… I love it! She’s just like “yeah I love a London Boy what OF IT BITCH” and it just feels like a mic drop like she’s like doing that move where you slam your hands at your crotch like a dick??? like idk it’s such a bde to me. Like she’s name dropping all these London things and bragging about how she’s English now because she’s got this guy and bragging about her type and her Anglophile fetish and idk it just feels like “you got something to SAY??!??!?!” I’ve heard that vibe is very London but idk because I do not have a london boy like she does.

Soon You’ll Get Better: Either Taylor played the album in the wrong order for these fans at the secret sessions or something because this 100% is that song she couldn’t listen to. I have heard it once and I am doubtful to listen to it again. I have listed to Ronan 3 times total. Soon You’ll Get Better is up there. I can’t. I’m so lucky my Dad is in remission and has been for 10 years… If his cancer came back, I don’t know what I’d do. It’s my biggest fear. And the Dixie Chicks sound beautiful on this track, so does the plucking country instrumentals. Gorgeous. I just… can’t. I admire Taylor and family for sharing this, but I can’t.

False God: I understand why this comes after Soon You’ll Get Better. She needs that thing to fall into, to give herself over into. The hard times my hurt and might be difficult, but they don’t end a relationship. Soon You’ll Get Better is a really hard time and a sick parent can put a lot of stress on a relationship and False God feels like the perfect way to pick up the main overaching love story and give it a response to Soon You’ll Get Better. It’s hard, but they can get through it. Even if it’s a false god, they’ll be there. That said, this song is far from my favorite. I feel so disconnected from it. It just feels boring. I get sucked in the last few lines of the pre-chours where she rushes through the lyrics and then the chorus is nice, but by the time the chorus ends, I’m bored again. The production gives me almost nothing. It feels like What A Feeling… a perfectly fine song, but boring as fuck and like it’s got a vibe that I don’t really fuck with. Like it feels like a song you get high to… and I don’t get high often, and I only do it ever when I’m going to sleep. So it feels like I’m going to sleep.

You Need to Calm Down: Let me start by prefacing that I ADORE the song. It was really important for her to say and I needed something to respond to the internet’s take down cancel culture and remind me not to get in the middle of the fights. However, this song sticks out like a sore thumb to me. It doesn’t feel like it fits. Coming after False God it feels like a complete outlier and like it doesn’t relate to the rest of the album. I could see an argument that it is about basic human respect and that kind of love and therefore has its place, but is this placement in the tracklist it??? I am thankful for the break when YNTCD comes because Soon You’ll Get Better is so heavy that it caries over to False God, but YNTCD feels completely unnecessary if you skip Soon You’ll Get Better and all of that heartbreak. Again though, it’s a classic and I adore it. Just not sure if I adore it for this album.

Afterglow: It’s so nice to hear a song from Taylor in which she apologizes and makes up after a fight. I don’t know why but I was worried she wouldn’t let us into the fights her and Joe have. That we would be outside. But like Ed said in End Game “you know that good and bad end up in a song.” Having a song from Taylor after 13 years that shows her experiencing conflict with a partner, apologizing, and ends without an end to the relationship…. And in this song it’s different from how she previously portrayed conflict too. Mine, in it’s hypothetical, expresses her “partner” chasing after her in. ME! (which we’ll get to in a second) also shows that kind of conflict resolution. Afterglow shows her taking responsibility and chasing after them. It’s one of my favorites for sure. Never underestimate the value of an apology. I have a lot to say.

ME!: First of all, fuck everyone “Hey kids, spelling is fun!” is hilarious and I cannot BELIEVE she took it out I am pissed. Second, I like this song so much more in the context of the album. Coming after Afterglow, it is important the next song both take responsibility for her negative traits that lead to that conflict and also not dwell on it. Me takes the whole conflict of Afterglow and reframes it from “I fucked up please don’t leave. Love me despite my flaws?” to “I know I’m difficult, but I am also so much more and damnit, I love me so I know you do too.” While the production still feels a bit hokey, I understand it’s purpose. I will forever be bitter about spelling is fun and you all are so mean. I hope you enjoy what you’ve done monsters.

It’s Nice to Have a Friend: My least favorite song on the album. It’s just so boring to me. The steel drums are nice, but it doesn’t feel like it ever goes anywhere. The chorus is too short and simple and I just feel nothing. idk I like the story I guess… meet in school, hang out timid first step… but then it ends in marriage? Haven’t we done this with Mary’s Song? idk i think I would like it better with a bridge in between the second chorus and the third verse because it’s like they skip the whole dating step. They go meeting, timid first step, MARRIAGE!!!! and the chorus is just not enough to separate second step from third. That and the fact the production doesn’t really go anywhere… It’s just so one note and boring and without any sort of conflict. I get it’s supposed to be like a daydream, I think… but even day dreams have conflicts. idk it’s a bad story because there’s no movement. 

Daylight: I see why this album was almost named Daylight. I’m going need a lot more time with this song. I can see it being one of my favorite Taylor songs ever eventually but I need to memorize every second of it to let myself go into it. The Red reference FUCKED ME UP. And the voice message at the end. And just the release of this song. The whole thing is an exhale. A total release of tension. It’s truly astonishing. Like I said though, to really immerse myself in it, I’m going to need to memorize it. Because it’s a release of tension, to find that and feel that, I need to focus on every lyric, every production element, every note and just….. let go. I do think this is one of the most important songs she’s ever written. Both for herself and for the rest of the world. This song is a reminder to breathe. To let it go. To focus on love. To find the love in your life. To not let it get too dark. It’s beautiful and it will keep me going on my path to recovery… as I expect it will for many others too.

Favorites (in order of most to least): The Archer, Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince, Lover = Paper Rings, Afterglow

Least favorites (in order most to least): I Think He Knows, False God, It’s Nice to Have a Friend

[bambyeol]

Radio FM (For me.) (final)

disclaimer : i can’t link the first part because Tumblr removes my fic from the searches if I link the first part ughsduashdihidas 

pairing/s: DJ Jaehwan ! x OC  

genre: angst, fluff , song-fic 

summary: DJ Jaehwan composes a song for a heartbroken listener not knowing he was the one who broke her heart.

“That was the greatest show yet. People never run out of heart-fluttering stories to tell, don’t they?” Jaehwan raved, still basking in the energy he said the show gave him. Agreeing with his previous statement and acknowledging his efforts, you nod.

“Thank you, Yeonrin.” he said in such an endearing tone as you two waited for the elevator to bring you down to the ground floor.

“You can stop thanking me, Jaehwan. You know I needed you too.”

Jaehwan gave you an exaggerated look as though he was unspeakably flattered. You wanted to hit him in the head playfully but decided against it, knowing that the simple gesture will open up gates and bring back feelings which were otherwise already thrown away. But were they really? Why does your heart keep beating this fast, then?

At a nearby convenience store, you both decided to stop for a drink before walking to the subway station on the way home, a routine that the two of you naturally got into.

“So..Jaehwan. You and Gayoung.” Trying to sound as casual as you can, as though this was simply a talk over a drink with a friend, you asked him.  “How did things go?”

“Still going. Can you believe it?” Jaehwan took a sip from his drink and giggled. “It’s been a full decade.”

You just smiled and listened to the rest of his stories with staged interest. Them going to the same university. Graduating together. Finding jobs as close as possible to one another and finally, what hit you the hardest, them finally moving into their own quaint apartment. “It’s small,” he says. “But it’s our own and it’s perfect.”

A perfect home for their perfect love story.

And here you were -  the shattered bystander.

The past week’s episodes were filled with first love stories, fluttering proposals, touching reunions. Not a single heartbreak story ever since he started the show. You thought this was quite odd. Where in the world were the other people who had their hearts broken like you did?

And then an idea crossed your mind. One that had more of a personal motive. Your mind has been tugging at you ever since you met Jaehwan again. Was it that you wanted him to know your side of a decade-old tale? However futile the effort may be? Or was it because, seeing him again, you thought it was the sign of another chance?

None of this matters.

At least, you’ll finally have a song especially written for you. At least, it was by him.

---

“He was a high school acquaintance who had a passion for music like no other person I knew at the time. We did not know each other until senior year came along and even then, we didn’t have the most pleasant of first meetings. But eventually, I found myself admiring his talent and his determination. We talked sporadically throughout the year, bonding over his songs and music in general. Right when I thought he felt the same way about me, he confessed to a girl. With my favorite song of his.”

The office floor was dark and silent except for a desk lamp shedding its yellowish glow on the far corner of the room and the sound of you typing away inside your cubicle. As is common when you had some extra work to accomplish, you stayed back, asking Jaehwan not to wait up for you as he had to do his own preparations for the next day’s show.

You read your entry again and again, making sure it was exactly at the line between vague and excessively specific. Despite wanting to get your message to him, you weren’t exactly sure if it would be to your convenience that he knew it was from you. You simply wanted to hear from him since your connection, if it could even be called a connection, was so abruptly interrupted.

The block of text stayed in your screen for what seemed like ages as you swiveled in your office chair again and again, as if the continuous turning would help you muster the courage to click the button.

And though it felt ridiculous, feeding audience content to your own show, you clicked send and shut your laptop without second thoughts.

----

Jaehwan entered the broadcast room the following evening with his forehead creased in deep thought. Right then and there, you thought he figured you out. But when you asked him why he came in looking like he had the world on his shoulders….

“I’m just internalizing. The story today is quite...heartbreaking, for once.” So he did read it, and he actually chose it. Although, there were no signs of suspicion in his features.

Quite heartbreaking. An understatement. In your case, anyways.

You heaved a sigh, but whether it was a sigh of relief or a sigh to brace yourself for what was to come, you had no clue.

“Yeonrin, 2 minutes.” a colleague got your attention and you sat down in your chair, trying to pull your mind back to work.

“Jaehwan-ah, all set?”

“Yep.” he pulled in his chair, positioning his face directly in front of the mic.

Within the two minutes before the start of the show, he went through the mental list he had: the lyrics he wrote, the chords of the song, and the advice he wanted to give. Contrary to what you thought, that moment ten years ago did cross his mind by the time he finished reading the entry. However, he simply acknowledged the similarities between the confession and nothing else. He never considered that his own confession resulted in the heartbreak of another.

“Our story today is a bit different from the content of the past week. A love that was stopped by a sudden confession. You listeners may be wondering ‘Huh? But confessions usually start up a relationship, don’t they?’” He started, putting on a silly voice which was supposed to mimic the audience.

You almost laugh as he struggled to keep the atmosphere appropriate to today’s story. Kim Jaehwan’s antics can be really out of place.

“That’s not wrong, dear listeners. But the said confession, sadly, was not directed to our letter sender. Yes, the hidden love that blossomed in her heart was not returned. And she witnessed someone she loved confess to someone else.”

He proceeded by reading the very words you wrote the night before, and it seemed like you were back in that cramped and humid broadcasting room on that last day as he uttered your story from his own mouth.

“Before I sing for this sender tonight, let me give my two cents. It is possible that you invalidated your feelings after such confession happened. But you had every right to those feelings, being human. Do not despise yourself for hanging onto them. But now, time has passed and both of you have your own stories to write. Acceptance will come with time and distance.”

And with that, he introduced his song, started strumming his guitar, inducing a melancholic tune.

Park Ji Min - Hopeless Love

I know there’s no hope, so every time I look at you It’s so hard, because I love you so much It hurts so much when you say I’m just a friend I’m standing outside the line that I can’t ever cross

It hurts but why can’t I turn away? This hopeless love In your eyes that look at me, there aren’t any feelings that are like mine It’s such a sad thing to know your heart

He finished the song and for a few seconds there was a resounding silence inside the broadcast room, all of the employees, bosses and assistants alike, had expressions as if their own hearts were touched by the music they just heard.

Jaehwan looked up from inside the booth and you stood up and moved your chair so that your back was to him. You had no assurance that your face did not completely mirror your heart.

Soft applause finally filled the room and Jaehwan wrapped up the show with his signature closing credits as you were left to organize the thoughts running through your head while pretending to be occupied by the control buttons.

Acceptance, time, distance. You’ve got the latter two taken care of, what with you having been away from him for a decade. But acceptance.

It felt hopeless.

---

It felt like the world was mocking your plea for closure, a stab to your desperation when Jaehwan’s song for you, “the anonymous sender”, became a big hit, ranking number 1 in the most-searched on Naver and opening up petitions for a complete song.

Several agencies winded up getting interested, sending their offers to Jaehwan to be under their label to which he dutifully declined, opting to use the radio station instead as means of publishing the full version.

“Why’d you reject the offers?”

“Oh. It would be better if it would be under the radio station still. Besides, I don’t want to make money out of someone’s heartache. That song was for her alone.”

“Oh.” you remain silent, pondering on his words, heart beating rapidly uncontrollably. You tuck stray hair behind your ear, “I’m sure she agrees.”

You look up. For sure, if Jaehwan just met your eyes then, he’d know. You were willing to let it slip, to finally come undone, to lay down the secrets you kept for 10 years.

Even if it meant a rejection was on-hand.

But he doesn’t. Instead, he busily rummages in his bag until he grabs a hold of a thin white envelope. A little too fancy, with the embossed gold patterns, and the emboldened letters.

You are invited to…

“Right. I’m sorry what were you saying again?” Jaehwan faces you, the white envelope bound to be passed to your now opened palms.

You didn’t know when you unfurled your palms as if you were expecting it.  You shake your head before staring at the envelope.

“No. It’s nothing…”

“I wanted to invite you,” he starts. Every word after that became heavier. It was like quicksand - the more you tried to move, the more you sunk into that feeling of helplessness.

“We’re going to get married. I mean.. I wanted us to get married first before we moved together, but being a musician was tough. But now, with my job and how the show’s a success, there’s nothing hindering us anymore.” he swung his arms animatedly, a mixture of embarrassment, joy and most of all endearment.

“Really. You always save me, Yeonrin. More than being my guardian angel. The more I think about it, you’re our guardian angel.” That was the finishing blow. Your heart was crushed completely, tears just a word away from spilling.You look down, regretting sending your story for the first time.

“That’s why, I’ll really appreciate it if you will come. You’re someone special to us. “

But I wanted to be the one special for you. You thought grimly.

“I can’t.” you reply immediately even before you could form a tactful rejection to the invitation. “Ah. I mean…”  you scramble for a reply, and a stray tear falls across your cheek.  You wipe it off immediately hoping Jaehwan wouldn’t have caught it, but he did and he reached for your wrist in concern.

“Yeonrin?” he asks softly. You swat  him away, retreating into a fetal position and the tears didn’t stop. He bends down, rubbing your back though unsure why you suddenly bursted.

Kim Jaehwan always can’t read the atmosphere for the love of God.

“I’m sorry,” you croak.  “I can’t.”

“No. No. It’s totally okay. I mean, you don’t need to come if you can’t,” a flustered Jaehwan replies still missing the mark.

With one deep breath, you momentarily pause the tears on your eyes.  “I can’t wish you happiness, Jaehwan.” You half-smile.

“Not back then, and definitely not now. I’ve always.” your arms folded atop her knees. “I’ve always, really, loved you.” you confess.

He freezes, “How long?” It was the only thing he could form despite the multiple questions rounding up his mind.

“Senior year.” you reply curtly, sniffling.

“Why didn’t you..” his question was left hanging, but you understood

You laugh mirthlessly, “How could I? When you beat me to it and confessed to Gayoung. I really thought that you liked me too. I guess that what we were was just confined in that broadcasting room. Similar to what we are now.”

“I sent that story.” you open up. “The one whose song became a hit, but even until now, all that I am is just a guardian angel. A person who leads you to where you wanted to be. “

His lips were pressed into a thin line. It hurt him that you endured everything, but he knew where his heart laid.

It will never be with you.

“I’m sorry.” he concludes

You nod understandingly.

“Thank you.” you bite your lips and muster up a smile. “It may have taken 10 years, but you finally sang for me.”

He nods, hands delicately removing his touch from your back until it’s beside him again.

--

Although many have requested for a full version of the song, Jaehwan did not sing it anymore and it was soon forgotten.

On the night of his wedding, you received an anonymous email with an mp3 file attached.

To my guardian angel...

-fin-

a/n : i will never be not sad over this fic :< my friend and I long completed this fic and I just really forgot to update it. I”M SO SORRY BUT THIS IS ALSO HARD TO READ FOR ME WITH THE HEARTBREAK. wanna one is disbanding soon also :< i’ll miss them dearly but writing for them has been such a gift. I remember typing in the middle of the night, fueled by their songs (and Day6 of course) . I wish to continue writing for them before they disband, but in the case that I won’t be able too, this mini author’s note will serve as a thank you for all the readers who read my fics. For all your support, and for all your patience as I continually break my promise of “i’ll post it soon” . Thank you for staying ;-; . Thank you for all your kind words. It’s been a great pleasure to write for you all.

[camimoo]

So, I watched the Heathers episode of Riverdale

K, so I’ve never watched Riverdale before (well like half an episode on tv once) but I heard there was a musical episode themed on Heathers.  

So I watched it…and accidentally started writing a really long play-by-play analysis:

Oh we’re really just gonna turn on a boombox and go. Ok.

Is KJ’s voice that high all the time? is that just the line they gave him? It’s so babie

Tiny girl  :((( so much autotune.

Oh gosh, that “whyyyyyyyyyyy” is too low for him. Otherwise the Kevin guy is probably their best guy singer.

Weird disorganized sometimes-choreography for background peeps. Like this row of desks will move, but the one next to it will be completely still

“Are all of you this miserable”  lol

The hair wooshy noises…this is only for this episode right? That can’t be in the regular run of the show right? It’s so loud

Oh heck, no harmony on Candy Store :( also weird bad cuts

Is veronica’s house always lit with crappy eerie blue lights?

Is every character selling drugs?  Like every single one?

Also is the plot that these kids have to stop their drug dealing moms?

“What are you gonna do?” “ I’m gonna take a bath.” *starts crying* lmao

Co director girl is so over acting.  Is she a regular character on this show?

Aw man lowering the big fun notes :(

Also can the Ram Sweeney guy actually act? Cuz based on what I’m seeing, imma go with No.

So, frequently, a disembodied voice is just singing and matches nobody on screen, like they don’t seem to concerned with getting the right person on screen lip-syncing at the right moment.

Also one of the jock dudes is suuuuper tone deaf

Again terrible edit cuts in the song.

I do appreciate that they are all indeed doing jello shots.

So we have the 3 heathers, and then we have … 3 more dark evil heathers?

Also this sometimes using riverdale-veronica as heathers-veronica but also not is confusing

Doing some Grease hand jive dancing?

There are some ridiculously loud sound effects in this. Archie’s jacket for one

I thought the neon lighting was just for promotional photos of Riverdale. But no. literally every scene is lit in neon red and blue (and maybe some yellow)

Ooh I like the “anything to share veronica”, that matches the musical where she has to blurt something out at the assembly

“my family’s always been unconventional.” Lol yeah your family is unconventional, (from the 5 seconds I’ve seen of them) your mother whose face never changes and she just wafts around, and your gravel-voice dad

Off-brand hostess cupcakes!

“He’s a real class act, that Sweet Pea”  how do y’all deliver any of this dialogue with a straight face when your characters have COMIC BOOK names??

“cuz your parents are splitsville” lol, way to be gentle

“I AM RED” and snaps and two replacement heathers come to back her up.  How many heathers are there in this show? We’re up to like 8

“Faux pink lady”.  So we are intentionally making these Grease references. Got it.

Lol she said Westerberg.

What’s the point of saying the one tiny girl is Veronica if Topaz(?) is gonna sing her songs

All hope is gone. Apparently these are the Highschool lyric changes.  Hmmm

I feel like they are mix and matching characters together willy-nilly.  I pick…you and …you! Yep threesome now.

Nuh uh.  Her name is PEACHES?!

The loud sound effects are killing me.  When you pat your thighs that doesn’t usually echo through a whole auditorium peeps.

Also why are we in the auditorium, you all clearly have neon lit mansions to go home to, why not use a more believable setting for seducing your friends?

So Tony/EvilHeather/Veronica is seeing visions of Cheryl/ActualHeather telling her she’s beautiful???

Oof that was a terrible record scratch noise.  Also whiplash! “Let’s make this beautifuuuul-STOP.”

Lol Fang.

What is ThE GaRgOyLe ChaMbEr?

Finally some harmony, it’s altered but still decent. :) Our love is god.

Are they having a secret gay cult wedding in a dungeon church?

The weird kinda half choreo the background cast does every once in a while.  Also specifically its only like the first row of extras in every case.  The back or outer rows never move..?

Do boxers really punch the air for practice by themselves in empty boxing rings?

k. I kinda hate the tiny girl’s voice,

so everybody is Veronica. Huh. Just takin turns.

I guess that’s just what KJ’s singing voice is. Ok.

Also when making cuts, why still have her say “well whoa you can punch real good.”  Just cut the “well whoa” and it will fit your scenario better.

Ok I actually super like the new harmony at the end of fight for me.

Principals are susceptible to cults. Got it.

Meet me at JUNKYARD STEVE’S??

Red scrunchie!

WAIT- did evil-heather and heather-heather used to be in love?

Wait they found the drug lab that quick?  Is this like a once-an-episode kinda thing? just gotta shut down the daily drug lab and move on

“and serial killer fathers” said in a comforting tone.

What even were those terrible piano chords as an intro to Seventeen?

But actually this song seems like a good fit for these traumatized children.  Help these babies :(

The voices of Cole and lilli (and most of them) sound like they were recorded so separately and in completely different ways, ones more breathy, others are echoey, some have autotune…hmm

Also someone pointed out that when you get to the “your eyes can’t we be seeeventeeeeeeen” line, Cole’s voice changes so drastically it has got to be somebody else.  I totally agree.

Sometimes the background music (not heathers) sounds like a western movie.  Like somebody just got challenged to a show down at high noon.

I want to crack an egg with a tiny egg hammer! And he didn’t even get to eat it.

Her dad sounds like a gravellier version of Misha Collins

She does really good at Lifeboat.

“I thought I was captain” diff lyrics.  Ok.

“drugs…terrible…what a nightmare”  delivered practically deadpan devoid of emotion. wow what quality dialogue.

“what is all over your faces?”  oh that’s just the drugs soot. No worries. Trashing meth labs always leaves me covered in soot.

Oof. “Martha are you free tonight?”  nobody answers. They all kinda glance around awkwardly.  Really? Why leave the name in at all if you aren’t including Martha, just change it.

When you burn down a building, shouldn’t you flee the scene of the crime? No? does being in the snake gang make him immune?

Also the pan out to make sure we saw the gas can in the back seat, cuz yanno I couldn’t’ve pieced that bit together on my own.

Also I’m assuming they’re drinking big gulps right?

Weird music edits

HOLD UP, is Tony dressed as Martha??? Wut.

Also none of their vocal styles go together, the transition from the others to tony is jarring. Tony is all sexy breathy poppy.

Hmm, interesting minimal interpretive dancing choreo

Ack, please blend in the tiny girl’s vocals.  Pls I beg you. At least I think its her.

Everyone else: *taking off clothes and jackets*

Jughead: *putting on his hat*

Hold up, I feel like from seeing the rest of the ep I can guess who most of the audience members are that are getting close ups/reaction shots, but I swear they added a new lady, heavily made up, and not Cole or Veronica’s mom...who…?

Oh and now we get creepy cult flash mob with hypnotizing claps. Ok.

 Overall:  pretty messy. No one really plays a specific character so it’s hard to gain any of the character growth that they get in the actual musical.  No one’s vocal style matches like at all.  The new lyrics and tons of edits were odd. The sound mixing was bad I think, like everything stuck out and didn’t match. This show is hilariously broody and they all have such funny names. Camilla whatshername is a good singer, actually the main 3 girls are p good, and the Kevin guy.  

Huh.

[opulopful]

I’m posting my Paranatural fanfic here because Reddit won’t allow comments over 10,000 characters for some reason. Warning: I went full fanfic mode on this thing; OC protagonist and everything. It’s also less joke-heavy than usual. Also I have done exactly zero editing. Anyway, hope you enjoy.

Suzy’s grand scheme

The third grudge was being uncooperative. Not that the other two had gone particularly smoothly either, but there’s a certain point you reach after a day of running back and forth through the woods, up and down hills, and through Mayview’s small-town streets that you begin to take every scraping stick and uneven curb as a personal offense. Marcella had passed that point an hour ago. It’s not easy to track a spirit, even a rampaging one like the insectoid monstrosities of today. Apparently somebody had disturbed a nest and although most of the swarm had been contained, a few had become grudges and escaped. That’s when they’d called Marcella. “Lazy Consortium… smidges!” She hissed between her teeth as she hurdled another log in pursuit. Marcella tended to make up new insults whenever she was feeling particularly upset. “‘Oops, messed up a basic containment procedure, who should we send to do cleanup? Oh, I know, let’s send Marcella. She loves cleanup runs. I bet she doesn’t even need any help; she’s just so good at them!’” She caught a glimpse of a shiny insect leg through the leaves ahead and tried to put on a small burst of speed. It didn’t work. Her foot caught a tree root and she only just stopped herself from falling. She stopped, hands on her knees, gasping for breath. Something was buzzing in her ears and it was getting louder. It took her a moment to realize it was coming from outside her head. A bluish green streak flew towards her, cleanly clipping several leaves from the branches above as it passed. The giant bug spirit had turned around and come back the way it came. “It’s taunting me.” Marcella panted. It was coming directly towards her at quite an alarming rate. “Maybe not taunting exactly…” The bug spirit screamed through the air toward her trailing fresh-cut leafy debris. Marcella was forced to dive to the side to avoid its assault. The grudge traced a shallow curve as it zipped through the trees, looping back around for another pass at Marcella. The shrill buzz of wings grew louder as it approached, yet since it was a spirit, the birds gave it no notice. Sounds produced by spirits are very strange to those used to sounds in the corporeal world. Since spirit sounds don’t interact with the physical world, they often don’t echo off of surfaces or reverberate through objects. A ghost duck’s quack has no echo. However, there is still a ghost Doppler effect for some reason and this is what Marcella was hearing as the bloatfly-lookin’ grudge hurtled toward her although it is unlikely this technical audio-spectral phenomenon was on her mind at the time. Instead, she was probably thinking something along the lines of: “If it hits me at that speed, this dumb bug is going to cut me in half.” The dumb bug was going all out, it had extended sharp-looking spectral energy protrusions to either side of its body to maximize its slicing efficiency. Leaves and branches alike were falling to the ground as it traced a long line through the trees. It dropped altitude as it made a- “Bee line haha get it?” Marcella grimaced at her own joke. -a bee line towards her with clear lethal intent. “No dodging to the side of the bugger this time.” She thought. “Bring it on, bug! I’m not afraid! Unlike some people, I can face my doom with decency.” It complied with remarkable enthusiasm. The persistent human was dead in its sights. No way to dodge now. She’d smushed her last larvae! It had almost reached her when Marcella jumped. The second to last thing that went through the grudge fly’s mind was “humans aren’t supposed to be able to do that!” The last thing that went through the grudge fly’s mind was the opposite end of the grudge fly. Marcella dropped the ten or so feet back to the ground, landing with an unnaturally soft thump. She smirked at the gooey blue blob behind her. “The thing spirits always forget is that there are, in fact, some downsides to poltergeisting.” The fly may have been fast, but even it was no match for a large sturdy elm. As Marcella slipped a marble back into her pocket, its color faded from a dull grey to bright blue streaked with white.

“Did you hear that, Collin? Sounded like crime to me!” Marcella looked around, the voice was coming from a nearby clearing: past the line where the trees stopped and the edge of a field began. A soccer field. “Oh man, I didn’t realize I had come this far.” Mayview Middle School held few positive memories for her and she tended to avoid it as much as possible. “All we could hear was you yelling, Suzy.” “Shudup, Dmitri, Collin can speak for himself. You heard that crash right, Collin?” “Actually I-“ “Told you he heard something. C’mon let’s investigate! Everybody spread out!” Marcella decided she didn’t want to be spotted snooping around in the woods behind the middle school on the opposite end of town from her own school. She hid in a nearby thicket. She could hear the small group drawing closer. “What do you think we’ll even find out here anyway? Suspicious squirrels?” “Well, Dmitri, I’m glad you asked. As a matter of fact, I just so happened to overhear a member of the Activity Club -“ (The tone of voice Suzy used to say ‘Activity Club’ was the kind of tone people usually reserve for such things as ‘cockroaches’ or ‘infidels’ or perhaps the name of the bandit gang who burned my small rural village and murdered my family and who I’ve dedicated my life to training in order to defeat) mention that they would be meeting out here after school today. I thought it might be worth investigating.” “Suzy, you stuffed yourself into the locker next to Max’s and waited for two hours until he finally showed up.” “Your point, Collin? A good investigative journalist must be prepared to do what it takes to get the scoop.” They were quite close now. Almost to the bush Marcella was hiding in. Suddenly they stopped. “Ok, Collin, you go left, Dmitri, straight. I’ll go right. Make sure to stay in contact via radio.” “You call this a radio?” “You know it’s the best we can do with our club’s funds, Dmitri.” “I was referring more to the glitter glue.” “Hey, Suzy, I thought you said you knew where the Activity Club was meeting. Wouldn’t left be the opposite direction?” “It’s important to be thorough in your investigations.” “Right, but-“ “Move out, team!” Marcella heard a deep sigh and a resigned plodding away through the underbrush. Another, lighter set of footsteps went the other way at a much faster pace. Almost as though someone had somewhere specific to be as soon as possible. Then Marcella noticed a pair of white sneakers standing next to her thicket. They weren’t walking anywhere. The other footsteps faded away. Marcella looked up. “Hi Dmitri.” “Hey Marcy.” “You know I hate it when people call me that.” “Yep.” Marcella stood up and dusted herself off. “Sounds like you have somewhere to be.” “Nah, Suzy can handle herself without my help.” “That’s what I mean.” “Oh, ha. Well, I’m not too worried about it.” “I thought you were part of the Activity club.” “I was.” “Oh.” There was an awkward pause. Well, awkward for Marcella. Dmitri never seemed to be awkward. Like a middle schooler talking with a high schooler in terse phrases about a ghost club in the woods behind the school was the most normal thing ever. “Weellp, I’ve gotta go. Always nice chatting with you, kid.” She gave Dmitri a pat on the shoulder. The look in his eyes could melt glass but his expression remained unperturbed. His hands never left his pockets. “See ya later, Marcy.” They turned and began to walk in different directions. “Hey Dmitri” Collin’s voice came through the trees. Marcella dove into another bush. “I heard voices, were you talking to somebody?” “Nope. Just coming up with some new lyrics.” “Oh, cool. Should we go after Suzy yet or…” “Eh, give it a minute or so.” The sound of something crashing through the trees came from the direction Suzy had gone. “On second thought, maybe we should check it out.” Marcella stood as they dashed off and removed a small rope with a loop on it from her wrist. The other end hung over a tree branch nearby. It smelled of orange juice. “Who put this thing here?” She muttered to herself. Then she heard a familiar buzzing overhead. “Not again.” Another large fly passed overhead. It wasn’t attacking but it was flying with purpose. “Aw man, I thought I got the last of them.” She rushed after the fly and toward the distant crashing.

“Do you hear it, Collin?” “Yeah I mean it’s pretty loud.” “That’s the sound of a scoop.” “Sounds like a moose.” “Don’t be ridiculous, Dmitri. A moose sounds more like- wait, I won’t fall for that again. We can’t afford to blow our cover this time.” “Wow, you got me Suzy. Foiled again.” The three were huddled behind an overgrown shed. Nearby, a few rocky outcroppings poked out of the hillside above the forrest of pine trees that stretched for miles around this side of the town. A few of the pine trees below seemed to be moving. This was where the crashing was coming from. “You’re sure you saw the Activity club?” whispered Collin. “Sure I’m sure.” Said Suzy “Just before you got here I saw them go behind that rock.” “That one?” “Didn’t I tell you to go the other way? We coulda flanked ‘em.” “But if I had gone the other way I would-“ “Shhh. Look!” Mr. Spender ascended one of the rock outcroppings and posed dramatically. “Now kids, I want you to pay close attention. This can be a great learning opportunity for all of you. Especially you Isaac.” Suddenly, he flew backward off the rock and landed in the grass below. After a moment, a driving-gloved hand emerged with one finger held upward. “Lesson one: Never let your guard down.” “Thank you for the demonstration, sir.”

“What are they doing?” Whispered Suzy. “Perhaps some kind of elaborate role-playing game.” “Shut up, no one asked you Collin.” “Maybe we should go ask them.” said Dmitri amicably. “Don’t you dare! So help me if you blow our cover I’ll… I’ll… cut your salary for a week!” “Oh no… my salary.” “Well, you’ll be sorry, ok.” “I’m shaking just thinking about it.” “Shh, stop distracting me. I have an idea.”

Marcella was not getting paid enough for this. True, the Consortium never actually paid anybody at all. There had been that thing with the ecto tokens for a while until people began to realize that the tokens got up and walked away every time you stopped watching them and they always seemed to end up in BL’s treasure hoard in the end. Regardless, she wasn’t getting paid enough for this just on general principle. The fly wasn’t moving at full speed which meant she could just barely keep up with it. “Land, you dumb bug.” she said between gritted teeth. Her side hurt from all the running she had been doing and she was feeling quite dehydrated. Suddenly the ground dropped away in front of her and she skidded to a halt. Ahead were a few rocks, a shed, and the flailing tendrils of a horrifying monstrosity. This was where the fly was headed. “Oh no,” She gasped “It’s a Putrimoid.”

Suzy had a plan. Whatever the Activity club was doing, it was definitely illegal. If not now, it could be illegal later she was sure. It all depended on how she spun the story. And she would get the story whatever it took. “Collin, you’re with me. I need somebody to carry the camera case. We’re going to get some shots from down there, right next to the action. Dmitri, you stay up here and get some establishing shots, B-rolls, rolling shutters, stuff like that.” Dmitri thought quickly. “Thanks for trusting me with the more important job, Suzy. I’ll be able to get way better shots from up here without any trees or anything in the way.” “Hmm, on second thought, maybe you should go down and try your luck in the trees. As the head journalist, it is my responsibility to make sure we get the best photographs possible for our audience. Therefore I shall take pictures from up here.” “Sure thing, Suzy.” Said Dmitri. He breathed a sigh of relief to himself as he crept down the hill. No need to add Suzy and Collin getting squashed to the mix of today’s problems.

Marcella considered her options. A Putrimoid was the result of a dying animal, usually a deer caught by a wolf or something, which ends up as a ghost at the same time as a related spirit is created from something nearby. If these two come together in just the wrong way, they can get stuck together. Potentially things can get worse from there and the spirits can mutate and grow and feed off of the purification of the dead animal which is where they draw their name. Really gross, really dangerous. Highly likely to poltergeist. This one had flailing tendrils almost as long as the surrounding trees were tall. Some other spirits and ghosts including the bloatfly hovered around it at relatively safe distance. Sadness on this scale tends to attract them. Occasionally a stray tendril would slice through one that got too close and it would poof out of existence. The trees crashed and waved where it struck them. Clearly a full-blown poltergeist. “Ooh, boy. How do I handle this?” A bolt of electricity arced from behind a rock and struck the end of a tentacle. It recoiled momentarily and then lashed out with a violent smack that shook the ground. “No, no, no, no! The journalists will see you!” After a moment’s hesitation Marcella’s brows set in a determined frown. She clenched her fist and leapt from the cliff.

“Did you see that!” “You’re kneeling on my neck.” moaned Collin, his voice slightly muffled. “A good stepladder wouldn’t complain so much. There was some kind of flash and the whole ground shook!” “I think they’re just setting off some fireworks or something. I doubt we’re going to see anything interesting today.” “Dmitri! Why are you back already?” Dmitri shrugged. “Eh, I couldn’t find any good places to take pictures. Besides, there’s nothing interesting to see anyway.” The ground shook with a boom that shook rocks loose from the hillside. A blond spike of hair and a paintbrush emerged from behind a rock with a terrible war cry. The yell descended down the hill out of sight with a flapping of sandals, getting fainter. There was a sharp crack and then the yell got louder again as it came back up the hill. Apparently the charge had met some resistance. “Dmitri!” “Ok, fine, I’ll go back down.”

Time froze as Marcella fell through the air. The sky turned black and filled with an endless starscape. Standing on the forest floor yet towering high above it stood a blocky, roughly humanoid figure holding a massive beam across its shoulders. It’s face was lost in shadow. “WHY DO YOU HESITATE, CHILD?” “I’m not… hesitating. I’m planning my next move.” “THERE IS NO NEED TO PLAN, YOU HAVE MY POWER ON YOUR SIDE.” Marcella glanced at the marble in her hand. At first glance, it appeared to be a flat, dull grey, but if you looked closer you would see intricate details: tiny divots and cracks almost like… craters. “I don’t want to compromise my deal with the consortium. I can’t let the people down there see me.” “I AM THE FULCRUM ON WHICH THE WORLD HANGS. I AM THE SCALES ON WHICH ARE WEIGHED THE SANDS OF TIME. IF I HAD BUT ANOTHER EARTH TO STAND UPON I COULD MOVE THE WORLD. THERE IS NO NEED TO OBSERVE THE PETTY RULES AND REGULATIONS SO NEEDLESSLY PRESSED UPON YOU.” “I’m the same as everybody else, Fulcrum. And you’re not as great as you think.” Color returned to the world as Marcella’s feet touched lightly down to the rocky hillside. The marble turned blue and white again and she slid more heavily down some gravel and stopped behind a tree. She peaked briefly around it to make sure everyone’s attention was still on the shaking trees ahead and then ducked her head and darted between the pines.

Max lounged against a moss-covered rock, bat hanging loosely at his side. “Nice going, Isaac. Almost got it that time.” “Maybe if you would help a little we could actually make some progress here.” Spender was giving some inspirational instruction from the sidelines which was difficult to hear over the din from the trees below. Isabel was busy elsewhere on another mission which she had called ‘more important than some weak old rot ghost’. Ed was making another attempt at a charge. This time he managed to cut almost a whole inch off the tip of a tendril with an ink slash before making a hasty retreat. “Nah, it looks like you guys have got it under control. Anyway, what am I supposed to do? I’ve got magnet powers. Do you see anything magnetic?” “Well, you could try doing something.” seethed Isaac. “What if you ran up to there and then I could push you up over the thing with a wind blast. You could aim your bat down at a weak spot and I could shoot a lightning bolt through the bat and deal some devastating damage!” “Wow, what a great plan. I like it… except maybe for the part where I get tossed through the air over an angry tentacle monster and then you shoot a lightning bolt at me.” “Well, you come up with something then!” “I have.” “What is it?” “You’re looking at it.” Max started a game of snake on his phone.

Suzy was beside herself with frustration. “I can’t see anything, they won’t come out from behind that rock but if I get closer, they’ll see me!” “Don’t worry Suzy. I’m sure they’ll have to come out in the open at some point to eat or sleep.” Collin said helpfully. He was sitting in the shade massaging his neck. “No, I’m going to have to take matters into my own hands. I’m just going to have to go down there, no matter the risk.” “Ok, well have fun.” “Oh, I will. I certainly will. Muahahaha” “You know your evil laugh would be more convincing if you actually were laughing not just saying muahaha like a normal word.” “Let me have this Collin.”

The beast loomed through the trees ahead. A pulsating shapeless mass with dozens of protruding tentacles flailing in every direction. Some passed through the things they struck without a mark, others thrashed through the trees with a horrible cacophony of destruction. The overall effect was very disconcerting. “Ok, here we go.” said Marcella, but her feet didn’t move. Heroics are more easily said than done. “I just need to find an opening.” Suddenly there was a calm. The tendrils calmed for a moment and a sudden hush fell over the valley. “What is…?” Then the Putrimoid shivered and a large eye opened on its side. It was red-rimmed, twitchy, and opened sideways but it was definitely a functioning eyeball because it looked directly at Marcella. “Oh no. It mutated again.” Marcella barely had time to dodge as a tendril came smashing down on the place she had been standing moments earlier. She stumbled into a tree. “This is not good.”

Ed had an idea. It was a good idea because he had seen it in the movies multiple times and it almost always worked. “I’m going in!” He proclaimed. Max looked at him skeptically but Isaac, who was more in tune with common story tropes, began to look panicked. “N-No! Ed, that is not going to work! Do NOT-“ “That’s what they always say.” Said Ed grimly “But sometimes a man’s just gotta do what he’s gotta do.” “Ed!” Ed began to charge down the hill once more, but something was different this time. Maybe it was the set of his shoulders, maybe it was the hard, steely look in his eyes, or maybe it was the fact that his battle cry was so high pitched it could have shattered plate glass.

Marcella was nearly exhausted. There were only so many tentacles you could dodge before your luck ran out. She took cover behind one of the sturdier-looking trees as another attack flew by. “I can’t even get close to it.” The massive eye swiveled away from Marcella and towards the open hillside. A small boy with a paintbrush was flailing his way down the hill screaming wildly. “What does he think he’s… oh no.” There was a blur as a tentacle shot forward, almost faster than the eye could follow. It wrapped itself around the boy and hoisted him into the air. Marcella watched helplessly as the tentacle was retracted, pulling the boy in towards its awful bulk. He struggled valiantly but was pulled inexorably inward. Marcella dashed towards him desperately but a tendril caught her before she had gone 5 steps, knocking her to the ground. She watched helplessly as the tentacle finally dragged the boy the last few feet and then with an awful ’schlorp’ he disappeared into the grisly mass. “You fetid freak! You pustule of incontinence!” Marcella yelled. “I will be your end if it kills me!” The putrimoid paid her no attention. Her vision narrowed, she felt her heart rate spike. This was it. She had to act. She only saw one path forward and it was looking very bumpy. The sky went black. Her marble was in her fist. “Do you have my back Fulcrum?” “ARE YOU HESITATING AGAIN?” “No, just figuring out the timing.” The sky snapped back to blue. Marcella sprinted forward. A tentacle lay limply on the ground, apparently forgotten for the moment as the putrimoid flailed its others. She ducked as another went by her head and then jumped heavily onto the grounded tendril. It snapped upwards reflexively flinging Marcella high into the air. Much higher than she should have flown. For a moment, the earth fell away and she seemed to be suspended in mid air. In the distance was the lake between the two hills of Mayview. The setting sun sparkled off the still water. Pine trees carpeted the landscape below. Marcella looked down. She saw the shed and the cliff with the three journalists one of which was snapping pictures wildly. She saw the Activity club further below, quietly freaking out about their lost comrade. Directly below, the eye of the monster stared up at her looking about as surprised as a horrid tentacled blob is capable of looking. Or maybe she just imagined that part. “Taste the wrath of Jupiter you skrunge!” She shouted. The marble in her fist turned from a dull grey to a pattern of creamy bands adorned with a small red spot. You see, mass may be consistent, but weight is relative and a fulcrum can tilt both ways. A pound of lead may weigh the same as a pound of feathers, but if you move the lead to, say, Neptune, it would weigh much more. If you move the mass on a lever further from the hinge, it tends to have more of an effect. And if you put an angry teenage girl 60 feet in the air and give her the same weight she would have at the core of Jupiter, well… Marcella surrounded herself with a prism of purple spectral energy, point downwards and plummeted at a stomach churning rate. There was a squelch that would scar the memories of everyone present for years and a sudden, deathly silence.

“That was the most disgusting thing I’ve ever done!” exclaimed Ed proudly. Ed stood in the middle of a clearing of destruction and pale orange goop and looked around dazed. He was covered with slime from head to toe. “Wow Ed!” Said Max. “I didn’t think you had it in you, but in the end, it was the Blob that had you in it.” “I knew you could do it.” Said Isaac, trying to sound nonchalant. “Never doubted it for a second.”

“Yes! Victory! I finally have definitive proof that the Activity Club is up to no good! My scheme has finally succeeded!” Suzy held up her camera in victory. Collin sat against the shed rubbing his neck. “At least call it a plan or something. You don’t have to flat out say you’re evil.” he muttered. “Hovering around weirdly has got to be against some kind of rule somewhere!” Ed’s antics today had looked very strange from a non-spectral perspective. “Oh, hey, Suzy. By the way.” Dmitri walked over to the shed where they were hiding again. “Did you remember to replace the memory card after I took it out to use in my camera?” “Memory card!?” Suzy frantically checked the card slot on her camera. “I told you to do that before we left!” “Oh, whoops.” “Dmitriiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!!”

[emilyjunk]

Prompt: Beca and Emily go on their first date without really realizing its their first date because both are too nervous to ask

this ended up only kind of being what you were asking but it got a little longer so i hope that makes up for the fact that it’s only like... slightly what you meant.

Stacie Conrad and Chloe Beale are often lumped together in the Bellas for several reasons. They’re gorgeous, first. They’re flirty, second. They love to party, third.

They’re also both hopeless romantics, fourth, and want their best friends to be as happy as they deserve to be, fifth.

Now those last two aren’t really reasons that the other Bellas lump them together, but they know, and they have often conspired together to be matchmakers when they’re out on the town and a little bit drunk.

They’ve never had the opportunity to act on these conspiratorial plans, per se, but they dream about it often.

Then, finally, one day, the opportunity arrives in the form of a lanky and enthusiastic girl.

Enter one Emily Junk.

//

When Chloe Beale first met Beca Mitchell, she knew they were going to be best friends. She has a keen sense for things like this, and her friendship with Beca Mitchell was practically written in the stars.

Now, Chloe isn’t a meddler. She likes people to forge their own paths. So when Beca started dating Jesse, and Chloe thought it was weird, she didn’t say anything. If her friend was happy, then she was happy.

(She was way happier for Beca when they broke up, because those two just did not make sense to Chloe, but she didn’t say that. No, sir, she did not. But she did think it. Secretly.)

No, Chloe is not a meddler.

But then Chloe met Emily Junk. Or more specifically, Chloe watched Beca Mitchell meet Emily Junk.

She watched as Beca softened every time Emily spoke, and she watched as Emily lit up whenever Beca walked into a room, and she watched them sing together, and write music together, and grow as people together.

And the hopeless romantic in her mixed with the bit of her that wants her best friends to be as happy as they deserve to be.

That’s when Chloe Beale became a meddler.

//

Stacie Conrad has been said to have a very nonspecific taste in boys and boyfriends. This is honestly true.

She does, however, have a very specific taste in friends.

And her taste in friends looks exactly like Emily Junk.

Eager, genuine, and lively, Emily caught Stacie’s eye immediately. She was just the type of person Stacie likes to take under her wing, groom to be their best self, and help set free from the chain of their own expectations.

Emily Junk is the very type of person that Stacie develops an inescapable fondness for, and Stacie is an extremely loyal person, the definition of ride or die, and when Stacie meets Emily, that’s exactly what she becomes.

So when it’s suddenly clear to her that Emily has a crush on one of the other people Stacie would ride or die for, she decides she has a new mission in life.

Stacie Conrad is going to set Emily Junk up with Beca Mitchell.

//

“Force them under the mistletoe at Christmas?”

“No, too awkward and Beca would just run away. Double date and then we ditch?”

“Hm, that could work, but it’s pretty obvious and they might reject the idea if we’re not subtle about it.”

Stacie huffs. “Ugh, we’ve thought of about 50 ways to set them up and none of them are good. Why can’t my brain think of something? It’s usually so smart.”

Chloe laughs. “Well, we’ve had like 6 drinks, Stace.”

“Only because we’ve been sitting here so long rejecting ideas! It’s going to be Valentine’s Day by the time we think of something.”

And then, through her drunken haze, Stacie has an idea. A wonderful idea. A genius idea.

A wonderfully genius idea.

//

Chloe calls it Galentine’s Day after one of the best episodes of TV in existence and her personal favorite holiday.

The idea is that they celebrate their Bella friendships by going on a friendship date with another Bella for Valentine’s Day. Half the Bellas will randomly pick the other half out of a hat, along with a random fun date activity, and they’ll enjoy a random lovely time together.

That’s the idea anyway. It’s just that Stacie and Chloe totally rig it so it’s not random at all.

GENIUS!

//

“Do we really have to do this?” Beca grumbles, her hand hovering over the hat. She’s not really in to Valentine’s Day.

“It’ll be fun, Bec!” Chloe beams, bouncing on her toes and her eyes gleaming with just a little too much excitement.

Beca doesn’t trust it one bit. She’s sure there are terrifying activities in that hat just waiting for her to pick one and embarrass herself at.

“Yeah, come on, Beca, we’re all going to pick one!” Stacie shoots her a wink from her spot next to Chloe where she’s holding the hat with the activities. “Live a little.”

Beca sighs. “Fine, but I’d like it to be known that I’m not happy about this at all.”

“Okay,” Stacie says. “Noted.”

“Noted? So I don’t have to do it?”

“No, you still have to do it, but I’m just making a note that you’re not happy about it. In my brain.”

Beca rolls her eyes. “Great.”

And she sticks her hand in the hat.

//

Chloe holds the hat high enough that Beca has to reach up to grab a slip of paper from inside it. It’s a good thing Beca is so short.

Otherwise she might see that all the slips have Emily Junk written on them.

//

“Emily,” Beca calls out, and the girl snaps her head up from where she’s looking down at her notebook.

“What?”

“You’re my… Galentine.”

Emily’s eyes widen before she breaks out in a wide smile. “Oh cool! What are we doing?”

“You get to pick,” Stacie says, innocently holding out her hat with the designated activities.

Which all say the same totally not random thing.

(Next to her, Chloe is very subtly and inconspicuously exchanging all the Emily Junk slips for ones with the other Bella’s names on them.)

Emily reaches into the hat and pulls out the chosen activity. “Concert in the park. Ooh, a concert! That’ll be fun!” She grins over at Beca, who smiles reluctantly.

“Yeah, I guess it could be worse. Live music is good, at least.”

Beca shrugs. Emily nods in excitement. Stacie and Chloe share a look.

What those two don’t know is that the concert, on Valentine’s Day, is actually a romantic couples concert where the band will solely do covers of the most iconic love songs in history.

//

When Emily gets to the Bella house on Valentine’s Day, Beca is already downstairs and waiting for her.

Emily’s kind of apprehensive because she knows Beca doesn’t really want to do this, and she knows it has nothing to do with her, Beca just doesn’t like this kind of thing, but she still feels a little uncertain. She thinks Beca is really cool, and super funny, and extremely beautiful and talented, and Emily wants Beca to like her and she wants them to have a fun time together.

So, yeah, she’s kind of a nervous person in general, but now she’s just like, extra nervous.

“You ready?” Beca asks, swinging her car keys around her finger and grabbing her bag.

“Yep. Mhmm. Totally. Let’s do this. Off we go!” She cringes when Beca shoots her a funny look. Why is she so awkward? Darn her nervous and naturally enthusiastic disposition.

They get in Beca’s car and Emily tries not to pat her knees anxiously as they start driving. She doesn’t know what to say? There’s like a billion things in her brain that she could say, but none of them really seem like things she should say. Or like things Beca would care about.

Thankfully she’s saved when Beca hands her the AUX cord. “You wanna play your music?”

Well, she’s saved from talking. But now she has to pick the music and oh my god what if Beca hates her music?!

“...Uh. Okay,” she says reluctantly, plugging the cord into her phone. She doesn’t know what to play so she just picks her random songs playlist where she puts new songs she hears that she kind of likes until she gets sick of them and takes them off.

It’s mostly just new songs by artists she hasn’t really heard of before, ones with lame lyrics but a good beat. Nothing too emotional, but super fun to dance to.

She thinks it’s okay because Beca nods her head along to the beat as she drives and turns the volume up, so Emily breathes a little easier.

“Do you know what band we’re seeing?” Emily asks as they pull up to their destination and find a place to park.

“Nope,” Beca shakes her head. “Chloe just said it’s some cover band and,” she does air quotes, “it’s not about the band, it’s about spending time together.”

Emily nods. “Well, that’s nice I guess. But I mean, it always is a little bit about the band, don’t you think? Hard to have a good time if they’re really bad.”

Beca grins over at her. “I think it’s always mostly about the band. But at least if they’re bad we can make fun of them together.”

“Deal,” Emily laughs, and Beca joins in, and suddenly Emily isn’t really nervous at all.

She suddenly feels like they’re going to have a really good time.

//

“Do you see them?”

“No.”

“How did we lose them? Beca drives like a grandma.”

Chloe suddenly aggressively points out the windshield. “There! They’re getting out of the car.”

Stacie follows Chloe’s finger and slowly parks her car a little ways away from Beca’s in the parking lot, swatting at Chloe when she sticks her head out of the window to see better. “Don’t let them see you, Chlo.”

“I’m not! They’re walking away. Quick, get out or we’ll lose them!”

They both scramble to get out of the car and follow Beca and Emily at a safe distance. They have a close call when Emily abruptly stops and runs back to Beca’s car for something she must have forgotten. Chloe and Stacie duck behind the nearest vehicle to hide.

“Did she see us?”

Stacie peeks her head out. “Hm. Nah, no way. You know how she is.”

Chloe nods. “It’s going to completely ruin this plan if we get caught stalking them, you know.”

“Not to mention Emily has pepper spray and might attack you if she mistakes you for a creep.”

At that moment, there’s a coughing noise beside them and they realize the car they hid behind is still occupied and the couple inside has their windows open and is staring at them.

Stacie shoots them a look. “What? You’ve never set your best friends up on a date and then spied on them before?”

Chloe giggles and grabs Stacie’s hand. “Come on, they’re getting away.”

Stacie narrows her eyes at the couple in the car again before letting Chloe pull her after their friends.

//

Beca has a bad vibe about this concert.

Something isn’t right about it.

She just can’t put her finger on what it is.

Everything looks normal. There’s a stage set up in the park, lots of standing room in the grass. There’s a beer tent. People milling about. Relatively good sound equipment.

It all seems fine.

So why is she getting such a weird vibe?

The sun is just starting to set and people are crowding the stage. “Come on, let’s get closer,” Beca says, and tugs on Emily’s jacket. She hates being short at standing room only concerts; she can never see.

They manage to get a relatively close spot, one not right behind any tall people, just as the band comes on stage. Emily lets Beca stand in front of her so she can see better.

“I can just see over your head,” Emily grins, her eyes crinkling at the corners as she teases Beca.

Beca resists the urge to stick out her tongue. “Bite me, Legacy.”

“HELLO ATLANTA!” The lead singer of the band says into the microphone. He looks like he’s in his forties and too old for the Vans he currently has on his feet. Beca snorts. “How y’all doing tonight?!”

There’s some pretty lame clapping, like barely any really, and the drummer bangs a little on the drums.

“Now we wanna thank all you guys and gals for coming to our annual Valentine’s Date in the Park. Stay bundled up out there by grabbing your honey and dancing along.”

The band jumps into their first song, Love Shack, which Beca lowkey doesn’t hate, so. Whatever. She bops her head along. She guesses it’s a classic and it is Valentine’s Day. She doesn’t know what she was expecting.

The band’s next song is I Don’t Wanna Miss a Thing by Aerosmith. Another classic, but the lead singer definitely doesn’t sound as good as Steven Tyler. After that comes some Beatles songs, God Only Knows by The Beach Boys, and You Make Loving Fun by Fleetwood Mac.

Now, Beca totally doesn’t really hate any of these songs. They’re, you know, classics, or whatever, and sure the band doesn’t sound that great but they’re still good songs.

It’s just that at this time she suddenly realizes what’s happening here.

Literally every person around them is middle-aged and part of a couple. There are middle-aged couples dancing together, singing to each other, looking lovingly at each other.

And kissing.

Oh God there’s so much kissing.

It suddenly hits her that this is totally a concert for older couples. On Valentine’s Day.

How could she have not seen this coming?

She feels Emily at her back and looks over her shoulder. Emily’s nodding along to the song, something by Poison, and looking mildly uninterested, but not completely bored.

“Em?” Beca screams just over the music.

Emily leans down so she can hear better. “Yeah?”

“Um, I just realized there’s like, nobody under forty in this crowd and they’re all like, making out.”

Emily’s head snaps back and she looks around them, her nose scrunching cutely. “Oh. Oh ew. That lady looks like my mom.”

“Can we get out of here? The band is kind of lame anyway.”

“Yeah, for sure.” Emily grins and starts to push her way through the crowd of couples. It’s not super thick, but Beca grabs the back of her jacket to keep from getting separated anyway.

They walk away from the stage a little and as they get further from the speakers, Beca feels like there suddenly is a lot more space around her and like, in her head.

She takes a big gulp of air.

“So. That was weird?” She says as they walk. “Do you think they did that on purpose or Chloe just didn’t realize it was for old people?”

“Beats me,” Emily shrugs. “I knew like, two of those songs, though.”

Beca grins at her. “Really? Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I dunno, I was just dancing. They weren’t the worst band ever.” She looks over at Beca. “Do you think they’ll yell at us if we go back from the concert early?”

“I mean, yell is a strong word,” but then she thinks about it. “But actually they probably will be insufferable about it. Maybe we should kill some more time.”

Emily nods. “Yeah, okay. You wanna walk around a bit? I think there’s this little ice cream place across the street from the other entrance of the park, if I remember correctly. Chloe took me there once.”

“Sounds good.”

The park isn’t that big, so it only takes them a few minutes to get to the other entrance and across the street to the ice cream place.

Beca gets mint chocolate chip immediately because it’s what she always gets, but Emily takes about five minutes trying to decide on a flavor. Finally she chooses this bright blue flavor that’s supposedly cotton candy.

“Really?” Beca smirks. “After all that deciding, you go with cotton candy?”

Emily shrugs happily. “It looks yummy.”

The teenager worker raises his eyebrows as he hands her the cone. “Yeah, we don’t get many people over twelve years old getting that flavor.”

Beca feels herself frowning a bit, unsure why.

The guy continues. “Makes your tongue blue. Just what every adult wants, right? Personally, never even tried it myself.”

Emily licks at the cone, unaffected, but Beca eyes the guy as she hands over her debit card. “Guess people just stop having fun when they get older,” she says. “Become boring like you.”

The guy just stares at her. “Sure. You together or separate?”

“Together,” Beca says at the same time as Emily says “Separate.”

The guy looks between them, then shrugs and charges Beca for them both.

“You didn’t have to do that,” Emily says when they’re walking out of the shop. “I have money.”

“I know,” Beca assures her. “I just wanted to. It’s fine.”

She doesn’t say that the worker rubbed her the wrong way for lowkey judging Emily’s flavor, because whatever. Emily doesn’t seem to care, so why should she?

They walk back through the park, licking their cones and talking about the Bellas and music. Beca shivers a little. It’s February and they’re eating ice cream and she didn’t exactly dress the warmest in her leather jacket, jeans, and Chucks.

Emily doesn’t seem to mind the brisk air and Beca thinks maybe she should’ve taken a cue from Emily’s wardrobe, a peacoat over dark skinny jeans and boots. And she’s wearing a plain black beanie, pulled over her wavy hair.

Emily catches her as she’s looking and Beca’s stomach flips when Emily smiles at her.

“What?” Emily asks, her hand coming up to her face. “Do I have ice cream on my face? That always happens.”

“No,” Beca says, uncertain if she should mention that Emily just looks unreally beautiful in the moonlight, little patches of lights shining golden on the ends of her hair every time they pass under a lit tree.

She just seems so… happy and carefree.

And Beca feels… weird. And it takes her a second to know why she’s feeling weird, but when she does, it causes her to shiver again.

She just realized that this moment is really… romantic.

“Why do you look like a Wrackspurt flew in your ears?”

Beca blinks, smiling over at Emily. “What? Is that that one thing from Harry Potter.”

Emily beams. “Yeah. Luna says they fly in your ears and make you all confused.”

“Kay dork.” She nudges Emily as they walk and their hands brush and they’ve made their way far enough back in the park that they’re coming up to the stage again.

And the song playing is Faithfully by Journey and Beca wonders for the first time…

Are they on a date?

Well sure, they’re on a friendship date, but like…

Why does this feel like a real date?

“If you think positive thoughts you can get rid of them,” Emily says and it takes Beca a moment to remember they were talking about Harry Potter.

“I am,” Beca murmurs because she is.

She’s thinking about how cute Emily is and how her lips look really soft and how she totally wants this to be a real date.

She’s so screwed.

//

“I can’t see them anymore.”

“Me neither. Crap, what if they left?”

Stacie scours the crowd for her two friends, but doesn’t see them among all the dancing couples. “Maybe they didn’t like the music?”

Chloe scrunches her nose. “Beca secretly loves all these songs. They’re on her classics playlist.”

“Maybe they realized we set them up to go to a couple’s concert.” Stacie sighs. “We should’ve had a backup plan.”

“Well, come on,” Chloe starts to push out of the crowd. “Let’s head back to the parking lot and see if they’re there. If Beca’s car is still there, we’ll just wait for them to come back.”

Suddenly Stacie tugs roughly on her jacket. “Oh my God, there!”

She pulls on Chloe’s arm and they duck behind a tree. It’s not a very good hiding place, but Beca and Emily don’t seem to notice them.

No, Stacie thinks. They’re too preoccupied staring at each other.

“Where’d they get those ice creams?” Chloe whispers, but Stacie shushes her.

“Look, they’re so cute. You can see Beca’s heart eyes from here!”

Chloe hums, peeking her head around Stacie’s shoulder. “Does it look like Emily keeps trying to hold her hand?”

“No, she does that when she walks next to you. She’s always bumping me with her elbow.”

They watch as their two friends walk down the path back toward the parking lot, Emily gesturing excitedly in that way she does when she talks, and Beca listening intently.

Stacie feels her heart flutter with happiness. “They are so cute.”

“I know, that’s why we tried to set them up,” Chloe laughs. “Should we follow them?”

“Yeah, but let’s wait a few minutes. They’re probably just going back to the Bella house.”

So they linger behind the tree, watching as Beca and Emily grow to be just specks in the darkness, and then they creep after them.

//

Emily’s never really sure about most things. She tries to be, but there are just so many variables.

That’s why she hates math.

She knows she can figure things out, but sometimes she’s just not sure which equation to use.

Right now with Beca kind of feels like that, too.

Emily’s feeling a lot of things and she’s just not sure which feeling is going to win out. It kind of depends on the situation, and how Beca feels, and why she paid for Emily’s ice cream and looked at her like Emily has answers to the whole freaking universe.

There’s a lot of variables here, but the most confusing one is Beca, and Emily’s not sure which equation she needs to follow through on to figure out if this is a date.

Like. A real date. Not this Galentine’s thing they’re supposed to be doing.

It’s just that Beca is like, so cool and so pretty and when she laughs, Emily feels like she did something right for once.

Also, it’s Valentine’s Day and she knows that doesn’t mean anything in this situation, but everything feels really soft and pretty and perfect.

And she was really nervous before starting this evening, but the longer she hangs out with Beca, the easier it is to talk to her. Beca is a super good listener, and she never interrupts or judges Emily for getting too excited. She asks questions like she’s actually interested and Emily doesn’t feel awkward.

She feels, like, right.

Like this is easy, and good, and… special.

And for the first time since the evening began, she once again doesn’t know if she should say what’s in her brain. Because she wants to ask Beca if this is a date, and why Beca keeps smiling at her like that while Emily sings along to Beca’s music in the car.

She holds it inside her the whole drive back until Beca’s parking on the street outside the Bella house and turning off the car and throwing them into silence.

And then she can’t hold it in anymore because she’s confused and eager and so, so uncertain.

“Was this a date?” She blurts out as they walk up the front steps.

Beca pauses in her movement to pull her keys out of her bag. She turns to look at Emily, an unreadable expression on her face. And oh God why did she say that?

She totally did the wrong equation and got all the variables confused and came to a very messed up conclusion.

“I mean, never mind. It’s just that it’s Valentine’s Day and you paid for my ice cream and I had a really good time with you and probably just read the vibes wrong. I do that sometimes. I’m kind of bad at reading social situations. It’s just that - ”

“Em.” Beca tugs on the collar of Emily’s jacket a little and she snaps her mouth shut. “Chill, please.”

“Sorry,” Emily murmurs, kind of wishing she could like, crawl under a rock and die or something.

Beca’s face softens and she smiles the tiniest smile, this fond and tender thing that Emily wants to memorize forever. “Do you want it to be a date?” Beca asks, staring at Emily curiously.

Emily opens her mouth, then shuts it, wrestling with herself, trying to decide what to say, but she can’t. So she just nods. “I think so.”

It seems to take 20 years for Beca to answer, or least for the longest breath Emily’s ever held in her life. “Yeah,” she says eventually. “Me too.”

“Really?” Emily kind of can’t believe it. Because Beca is so… Beca. And Emily is so… well, Emily.

“I had like, a really good time with you. Even if that concert was for lame old people” Beca shrugs, her cheeks turning red. “And I was thinking earlier that you look really pretty.”

Happiness basically explodes in Emily’s chest. “You think I’m pretty?”

Beca gives her an incredulous look. “Yeah dude? You’re all,” she waves her hand in front of Emily’s face as if that’s supposed to explain it. “Glowy.”

Beca practically cringes in embarrassment, but Emily thinks it’s probably the cutest thing she’s ever experienced.

“Like that glowy kid from Sky High?”

Beca snorts. “Sure. Something like that.”

Emily bounces on her toes happily. “Cool. So. You wanna go on another date with me?”

Beca looks away, trying to hide her smile. Emily feels on top of the world. “Yeah, alright.”

“Awesome.” She can’t stop smiling. “Well then I’m gonna go back to my dorm while I’m ahead here.” Beca shakes her head like she can’t believe Emily is real. Emily can relate. This doesn’t feel real at all. “Happy Valentine’s Day, Beca.”

Beca tilts her head to the side, takes a breath as if to brace herself, and then leans forward on her tiptoes.

Emily’s senses are suddenly overwhelmed when Beca’s lips connect with hers. She closes her eyes, her breath catching in her throat, her heart hammering madly in her chest.

It’s the softest most amazing first kiss she’s ever had in her life.

She might pass out.

Beca pulls back and Emily can feel her smiling against her lips before she even opens her eyes. She almost doesn’t want to in case Beca vanishes into thin air and she wakes up from some amazing dream.

Magically, unbelievably, when she finally does blink them open, Beca is still there, smirking at her and cheeks flushed. She shakes her head and finally pulls her keys out of her bag. She unlocks the door, and starts to step inside.

“Goodnight, Legacy,” she calls, laughter in her voice, and Emily just watches as Beca disappears inside the Bella house, the door closing behind her.

Emily is usually not that great at math, but after all the solved variables she was just given, she kind of thinks that she + Beca totally = the heart emoji.

//

“Stace, we suck at this sleuthing thing,” Chloe says as they pull up to the Bella house and see Beca’s car already parked in its usual spot. “We barely saw what they did all night!”

“Well, they didn’t follow the unofficial plan that we had for them,” Stacie frowns. “That’s rude of them.”

But then Chloe gasps. “Wait there’s Emily!”

Stacie glances out the window, and indeed, there is Emily, walking away from the Bella house and toward campus.

They jump out of the car and hurry down the sidewalk.

“You know, I’m never meddling again,” Chloe huffs as they just about catch up to her.

It’s probably for the best, she thinks, when they call out Emily’s name and only barely avoid getting pepper sprayed in the face because Emily clumsily drops her pepper spray in fright.

They went to all this trouble to set up this date and it clearly didn’t even work! Otherwise Beca and Emily would probably be kissing on the Bella porch or something else equally romantic!

No, Chloe thinks. She’s never meddling again.

Her friends will have to find out that they totes like each other all on their own!

[leapingtitan]

Re:CREATORS Original Soundtrack — Review

Yeah, I’m doing this. I started this like 2 weeks ago but didn’t have that much time to listen through the whole thing. Regardless, I have heard every song that Sawano has made for this series and I plan to watch the anime sometime in summer.

Now, to make clear what exactly I will be sharing my opinions on, I have listened to both discs of the OST, the Rearrange CD and the gravityWall/shØut album for Re:CREATORS.

The way I’ll do this is, I will post the notes I took when I listened to each of the songs for the first time and give my overall rating (1-10) at the end. Also, if you haven’t heard the OST but want to experience it fresh, this post may be full of music spoilers (NOT spoilers from the anime, obviously) for you. Whatever works best for you, of course.

Let’s do this.

Disc 1

01. God of Ink

First song! Without a doubt, kicks off very strong and slowly becomes more and more epic. Glad to get a new solo mpi song. I’m afraid it’s been a while since I’ve heard one of those. 

Anyway, the instruments used are great, though it gets slightly but very subtly repetitive around the 2nd chorus. Nevertheless, I enjoyed the song but I expected it to be a little more… uplifting? 

I expect the instrumental at the end will give me a better grasp of the feel. But the lyrics are great! Probably my favorite element of the song.

Rating: 8.5/10

02. rE:CRe@T0RS

Classic Sawano. It’s not a Sawano score if one of the tracks isn’t named after the series it’s used in. Well, apart from that, once again very intense start. 

This initially gave me the vibe of a surprise battle that happens in the middle of the city. (Don’t tell me if I’m right about this by the way). 

Overall, nicely put together in terms of sections. The middle kind of dulled out on me but the beginning and end.. just right.

Rating: 9.5/10

03. Re:3$penS

Okay so. First of all.. that bass. I’m assuming with some of these songs, the way I would enjoy them more would be to see the scene in the anime. I’m looking forward to this one specifically, as it imposes a feeling of danger and mystery. 

Very nice! The drums and guitar stand out the most, but it’s honestly so good overall.

Rating: 9/10

04. 4GL4yu8RE:E

Now this is what I’m talking about. Fast-paced theme which would fit any action scene! I love it. The orchestra stands out the most but the percussion… give me. I love the overall upbeat sound of it.

Now, the second half gave me chills. That piano was amazing and the drop… man, I don’t know what to say. Amazing song.

Rating: 9.5/10

05. Hey39-udn

Well, nothing too impressive about the first half. The second part, however, is the definition of lit. I love the synth honestly.. like, very upbeat. 

This is the first song on this OST I’ve heard so far that hypes you this much. (Barricades is the last song that gave me this vibe).

Rating: 8/10

06. RE:3343

Before Listening

I’ve seen memes about this song and its name. And memes are good. Expectations are high, but let’s see if they sail high on the high winds. 

After Listening

Okay, well.. this was not what I expected lmao. It sounds like it’s on the Grenzlinie borderline of being either a “standard” track or an atmospheric/ambience track.

I like it, though! Gives off this weird feeling of hollowness but also.. hope? Not the best way to describe, it I know. But the subtle sounds in the background are very nice.

Rating: 9/10

07. HERE I AM

Am I listening to Sawano or is this vocaloid?

I’m just joking. I love this song.

Though... this sounds like it’s supposed to be an ED rather than an actual theme but considering how different it is than gravityWall, I’m just gonna guess that I’m wrong about that one. 

I can only imagine what kind of character or scene this is used in. Honestly though, it made me laugh. It’s quite cheerful and upbeat and the lyrics are gold. I’m not kidding. Actually.. screw it. This one gets the perfect rating from me. GG Sawano.

Rating: 10/10

08. 2109-a8Ru件

Yo. YO. I’m going around giving perfect ratings as if it was free… well.. that’s what it feels like at least. 

BOI. I can jam to this. 

This is nice. This is very good. 

The Daily Life from the snk soundtrack is a great chill song but this outclasses it in every way. I love the percussion and the folk-ish sound at the beginning. Honestly like this is perfect in every way. One of the best tracks so far, no doubt!

Rating: 10/10

09. AL:Lu

Before Listening

Okay, this one…. Let’s see… how should I put this. I’ve seen thoughts about this song, mainly people saying it’s the best one. I have high expectations and I’m bracing myself for a slow, sad vocal song. 

If I’m wrong then you’re probably laughing while reading this. Here we go. 

After Listening 

…Okay. Well. I. Uhm. Uhhhhhhhhh. LMAO Okay so. AHAHAHAHAHAH. GODDAMN IS THIS HYPE. 

For the record, this is the first Eliana song I’ve heard. Apparently she was in Kabaneri as well? I don’t remember, but this is is new. AND IT’S AWESOME. GODDAMN SON! 

The lyrics are amazing, the song gets you hyped and… yeah Eliana is awesome. I am definitely going back to listen to this later. 

Note while writing this post

I’ve probably listened to this song like 40 times already and I have exactly zero regrets.

Rating: 10/10

10. 高度8b6n

Wow. This song is just pure hype. The badass guitar.. and that bass. Toshino Tanabe my boi, how did I not know who you were earlier so I could praise you. 

Honestly though, this one is great in terms of pacing, speed and intensity, so to say. I imagine the scene this is used in (if it’s already been used) is memorable. So far so good! I love it!

Rating: 9.5/10

11. 8sawOGRE6

This sounds like one of those tracks made for a purposely attractive female villain. 

Oh well. I like it, but it doesn’t stand out that much. Well, the middle does. I love the drums and the “hype” but apart from that, nothing too much. Still an amazing feel, though.

Rating: 8/10

12. Layers

Before Listening 

First a song that has “OGRE” in the title and then a song named “Layers”? What? Did Sawano browse Shrek memes for 5 hours before naming these songs? Well… I hope so because that would be dank. 

Anyway, I’ve also seen this one get a lot of praise and impatience when people were waiting for it. Let’s take a look and see what we get.

After Listening

Okay this was interesting! The lyrics definitely raise some questions though I already have an idea of what the concept of the series is. It’s good! 

I haven’t heard an Aimee Blackschleger song in a long time, the last time being Release My Soul MOD and DOA. 

Some parts are pure hype while others are just headbang material. I can’t quite say which one it leans to or.. if it’s the same or not, though lol. But I like it!

Also, it’s 4:20 minutes long. Dank af boi.

Rating: 420/69 9.5/10

13. re:pianohi1tars

This, my friends, is a piano masterpiece. It gives off so many emotions at once it’s hard to keep track of it. Like, the fast pacing and the “epicness” behind it is just mind-blowing. 

It’s a balanced track that doesn’t go in too many directions but it delivers the feeling it’s trying to convey JUST right. Nice one! 

Rating: 9/10

14. ∞GodMachine

Note Before Listening

This sounds like it’s going to be an all out grand and heavy orchestra. I’ve seen SOME talks about this one, so I’m bracing myself. 

After Listening

Well. I’m not TOO impressed by the second half, but the first one is great! I love the part before the transition to the second part.. if that makes sense. 

The percussion and synth is very pleasant to listen to, though it isn’t nearly as “hype” if you may… not counting the first half. Great song overall but not too many highlights for me… but still great dontgetmewrong. 

Rating: 8.5/10

15. ABYSSwaltz

The song title is cool. Everything else… not so cool. 

Seriously, Gemie’s German pronunciations shorten my lifespan with each millisecond. The song itself doesn’t sound TOO bad but it’s not really something I can enjoy that much or.. interpret, I guess. 

The lyrics kind of work, but.. well… yeah... not really much of a highlight.

Rating: 6.5/10

16. Pf:Creators

I laughed at the last 3 seconds. This is gold. Did I mention how much I love chill songs I can just jam to? I love it, honestly. 

Kind of repetitive at parts but I can kind of visualize the scene it’s used in. Good stuff indeed.

Rating: 9/10

17. 音:9RE:eita-zu

This one was long. Or, I guess you can say… zu long. It’s nice, though! 

I am especially fond of the last minute and a half, though the rest of the orchestra throughout the track doesn’t stand out to me as much. 

It’s enjoyable to listen to but not too many highlights. The instruments used are mind-blowing, however and have all of my yes.

Rating: 9/10

18. BRAVE THE OCEAN

Yep. Eliana is definitely on her way to being my favorite female vocalist. Honestly... amazing and powerful voice which conveys a strong feeling. 

As for the song itself, I wouldn’t say it’s something I would listen to extensively. It’s upbeat and.. sounds like an ED song at the end of a cour or a really happy episode. Can’t quite put my finger on it. 

The lyrics are fine, though I guess it’s a tiny bit too upbeat for me. HERE I AM nailed that aspect though, to avoid contradicting myself.

Rating: 8.5/10

Disc 2

01. E:verydaytor1

This song has like… so many parts. I like the cheerful and uplifting tone of the last few minutes, but overall I feel like putting so many different tones in one track is a bit overkill, even for Sawano. 

Regardless, I really like the last 2 minutes but overall it’s a bit excessive and not enough highlights.

Rating: 7/10

02. Pf:CreatorsII

Before Listening

Oh, there’s a sequel to Pf:Creators. Okay. 

After Listening

Oh, it’s completely different than the first one. Lmao.

I love me some good piano. So relaxing and soothing… idk what else to say about it but it pulls your heartstrings. I imagine the scene this is used in at.

Rating: 9/10

03. E:verydaytor2

Before Listening

Uhh… okay. Sequel again? Is there some kind of pattern here that I am missing?

After Listening

Okay, I get it. I see the remaining tracks below and it seems like these are the atmospheric tracks with consecutive naming patterns… familiar and typicial of Sawano. It’s like Disc 2 of Snk S2 all over again lmao. 

Anyways I like how cheerful this is but it really didn’t stick out to me that much. It’s an average track so to say.

Rating: 7/10

04. Pf:CreatorsIII

A TRILOGY! 

Now this I can get behind! Creepy, kind of sad and kind of… foreshadowing something to happen. Hard to describe but it’s that good feeling of creepiness.

Rating: 9.5/10

05. SawElephant4

Before Listening

TFW Sawano breaks his own naming combo. YouSawBIGGELEPHA/N:T??? 

After Listening

Damn. Bury me under all of those creepy strings. I love it honesty. Near-flawless choice of instruments and composition and very interesting to listen to. 

Very fond of the entire song and not just certain sections. I can get behind this, honestly.

Rating: 9.5/10

06. Pf:CreatorsIV

Before Listening

Not a trilogy anymore... nevermind.

After Listening

Ah, here we go. The first song I’ve heard on this OST that almost made me cry. Seriously... the piano songs are always the sneaky ones. Damn ninjas cutting onions. Amazing piece.

Rating: 10/10

07. E:verydaytor3

…This song is just funny. Lmao. 

The percussion and perfectly placed sound effects are the catchiest thing I’ve heard in a long time. I want to watch the anime just to see where this is used in, to be honest.

Rating: 9.5/10

08. Pf:CreatorsV

What beautiful piano. It’s a really soothing and catching song that messes with your feelings. I love it.

It doesn’t have too many highlights for me to point out but it’s a nice song. Somewhat average but quite nice nonetheless.

Rating: 8/10

09. God-ground2SAY310

I feel like this is one of those songs where I need to listen to it multiple times to actually appreciate it enough. 

It has an interest instrument choice, but for an “atmospheric” track, I’d say it’s slightly weak. It’s not necessarily a bad song but I guess it conveys what it’s trying to convey.

Rating: 6.5/10

10. Pf:CreatorsVI

Creepy atmospheric piano track FTW.

To be completely honest, it’s average. But because of my personal enjoyment and love for creepy, slow, ominous music, I think I can dig it. A lot.

Rating: 9/10

11. E:verydaytor4

Have I mentioned how much I love upbeat folk jams? Because I do. 

This one gets it. I’m kind of curious about the second half as it sounds like it would play in the last few seconds of the series finale… not that I would know. 

Either way, this one gets the one and only perfect rating because of that first half. Amazing.

Rating: 10/10

12. DA-world2HEN90

Woah, this one was short. 

Anyway, nice soothing guitar! I love me some of that. I wish I could say more about this one to be honest but that’s really it. 

Nice guitarist you got there, Sawano.

Rating: 9/10

13. God of ink (Instrumental)

I love it. It’s a very good standalone song and works just as fine as it does without mpi’s vocals. 

Don’t get be wrong, I love both versions but with this one I can appreciate the guitar more!

Also, I’m a sucker for slides. lmao

Rating: 9/10

14. HERE I AM (Instrumental)

I’m.. not even gonna say anything.

This song just makes you happy. That’s it.

Both with and without the vocals, it’s catchy af just makes you smile and laugh. I love them both.

Rating: 10/10

15. Layers (Instrumental)

Oh... OH.

Holy fuck.

That guitar and those drums… sorry Aimee, this version is a lot better. 

I dare say this is the best song on the entire OST.. if not, I’m putting it in the same league as AL:Lu. A ridiculously good Sawano piece and one that I will definitely come back to. I didn’t expect it to be this good since I wasn’t TOO impressed with vocals for Layers (I mean I love it but it isn’t really a highlight for me) but… 

Yeah. 

This is perfection and pure badass.

Rating: 10/10

16. BRAVE THE OCEAN (Instrumental)

Aaaaand yeah. This is ALSO better than the vocals, as much as I like Eliana after AL:Lu. 

Goddamn it. This is really nice to listen to, especially after the second half when the guitar kicks in. I thought the song was slightly too upbeat for my taste but this I can get behind. Quite chilling and nice to listen to!

Rating: 10/10

Rearrange CD

01. God of ink <MODv>

Okay. I prefer this more than the original version. Those drums are lovely and so is the extra piano. I’m glad they kept the original riff, but like.. the drums. 

Too good. Out of the three versions that this song has, I still like the instrumental of the original the most, though this one is the better vocal version in my opinion.

Rating: 10/10

02. Layers <MODv>

HOLY SHIT THAT GUITAR RIFF!! CHILL SAWANO OH MY GOD I WAS NOT READY. 

Okay the strings are kind of… not sure. I like the drums. If this one had an instrumental I guess I would appreciate it more but to be honest this is great! 

Putting it on equal terms with the original as they both have their own unique things about them. This one makes heavier use of instruments but the original is more upbeat and intense. When it all comes down to, I prefer the instrumental of the original here as well, obviously.

Rating: 9.5/10

03. BRAVE THE OCEAN <MODv>

Okay, this one works a lot better. I can actually listen to the lyrics a lot easier with a lighter use of techno-ish drums. I love them a lot, especially after the first chorus. 

Overall, this is definitely better than the original BRAVE THE OCEAN and conveys a much brighter feeling, at least from my perspective.

Rating: 10/10

gravityWall/shØut

Note: For the record, this is not really a “Blind” listen because I already heard all of these songs yesterday when they came out (I couldn’t contain myself). The same goes for gravityWall, which I’ve heard a while ago, but regardless, I will share my thoughts on all of them per procedure, and one of these holds the title of Best Song.

01. gravityWall

The first OP! I have to admit, I kind of skimmed through it when the TV-Size version came out with the anime. I don’t know why. 

But when the full version came out, I listened the fuck out of it. I love it, honestly. Gemie and Tielle make an amazing combination. I could complain about Tielle’s lyric-writing skills during the English parts, but it still works, I guess. Amazing song.

Rating: 9.5/10

02. gravityWall (Instrumental)

This song works better with vocals. It’s nice to listen to, but I don’t think it’s good enough to be its own song. Like I said, Gemie and Tielle make the best combo and it worked perfectly with the vocals. But without them... eh, not really.

Rating: 7.5/10

03. shØut

Here it is. The one and only. After having listened to every single song Sawano has made for Re:CREATORS, this one takes the cake for my number 1 favorite. Only HAIRS ahead of Layers (Instrumental). and the next song you will see below. I love it.

Funny thing. Originally my favorite was AL:Lu, but I really loved gravityWall. Then again, gravityWall is an OP so it obviously needs to have a different and better sound than the soundtrack pieces.

Well, with this song, it’s not a problem. Because shØut is AL:Lu made into an OP. Like.. WHAT?! Fucking perfect. It’s so satisfying to actually acknowledge this song’s existence yet alone listen to it. Sawano delievered. Perfect. Did I mention Gemie and Tielle do the combo again? Just... No words.

Rating: 10/10

04. shØut (Instrumental)

HAHA. Even without the Tiellie Combo™ (that’s what I’m calling it now, deal with it), this sound still kicks your ass either way. 

I just feel bad putting it and its vocal version to compete, but I can listen to both depending on what mood I am in. 

Although I said shØut was my favorite, in reality I love both of these equally. None is better. I put the vocal version on there but I don’t like one more than the other. Just kill me if I need to choose one. The chorus without vocals especially is too badass for it.

Rating: 10/10

05. oldToday

From what I have gathered, this is a standalone song that is neither part of the OST, nor is it used anywhere. 

It should be. It’s.. just so beautiful. I don’t dig the beginning too much the second half is just amazing. Bury me with it because it’s so beautiful... just.. perfection. If you want to cry of happiness, this is of you.

Rating: 10/10

Results (Average Rating)

Disc 1: 8.94

Disc 2: 8.31

Rearrange CD: 9.83

gravityWall/shØut: 9.40

Final Rating: 9.12

Conclusion

Overall, I would say this OST is simply amazing. To be perfectly honest, there are only a handful of songs I would actually go back and listen to, but the ones I would are just simply amazing. Sawano definitely showed some greatness here, but I wouldn’t say this is his highlight score of any kind. There’s definitely a lot of tracks, but in my opinion, Guilty Crown, Crisis and OST have an insanely large count of memorable songs.

Maybe that’s just my opinion. Maybe it’s because I haven’t actually seen the anime and got to experience the songs the way they are supposed to be experienced. Don’t worry. I plan to watch it in summer. My knowledge of it isn’t too positive from what I’ve heard, but I do plan to give it a try, regardless of that. The music is simply amazing

Should you give it a try? Oh, absolutely. It has a wide variety of tracks which all convey different feelings. I’m sure there’s at least 2 or 3 in there that will appeal to you in one way or another. Until next time!

Overall Favorite Track:  shØut

Final Rating (Again): 9,12

[anastiel]

Bring it on Home

12x19 coda. Part 1/2 (Cas’ POV) 1.5k. (ao3)

Cas is sitting in the Bunker’s main room, going over some of Sam’s research, when a dull clunk sounds next to him on the table. He glances over at the noise to see Dean pushing a cassette towards him.

“What's this?” Cas asks, looking up at Dean.

Dean clears his throat, eyes darting away from Cas’, and taps two fingers on the top of the cassette, “For when you're on the road next.”

Cas takes the cassette in his hand, examining it between his fingers.  Deans Top 13 Zepp Traxx.

“You made this for me?”

Dean’s cheeks color, but he recovers quickly, with one of those pleased-confident smiles of his. “Yep! Remember how I was talking the other day about educating you on good music? Well, Zepp’s the best so I figured this would be a good place to start.”

“Thank you, Dean, I'll make sure to take careful notes on my opinions about each song,” Cas replies. He rubs a thumb over Dean's handwriting on the front and smiles, slipping the tape into the pocket of his suit jacket.

Dean chuckles, awkwardly stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jeans, “Well, I expect a full report back.”

“I'll make sure to call you after my first listen,” Cas replies, mouth tipping up into a smirk.

“You better.”

When Cas leaves on his quest for Kelly Kline, he heads east first, driving his rickety truck on the 36 towards Kansas City. He flicks on the local classical station until it fizzes out two hours later and he remembers the weight in his suit pocket.

Keeping one hand on the wheel, Cas digs the tape out of his pocket and pushes it into the tape deck. Dean didn’t tell him the track listing, so Cas doesn’t know for sure which songs are on here. The first song starts off with a roaring guitar and Cas has definitely heard this one before. He smiles, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel to the beat. Images filter through his mind of Dean singing at the top of his lungs, very out of tune, and slamming his hands against the steering wheel like it’s a drum set.

The first song ends and the second starts, just as fast as the first, but with a quicker beat of drums and guitars. Robert Plant sings -- well Cas isn’t sure singing is the correct word, it’s more like yell-singing -- about Rock N’ Roll. Cas does, however, understand the appeal to this man’s voice. It’s rough, but in a strangely enchanting and seductive way. He wonders if this, aside from the musical quality, is what drew Dean to love this band. After the first three songs, all upbeat, and obviously rock songs, the fourth slows down a bit, starting with a ballad-like guitar and a haunting whistle in the background. Ah, yes. Stairway to Heaven. It’s a beautiful song, untrue, since there is no possible way for anyone to buy a stairway to heaven, and portals are the only access to heaven now. The song may be rather romantic in its idealism, but Cas can clearly picture Sam and Dean as kids sprawled out in the backseat, listening to this song, while their father drives, headlights piercing the darkness.

He wonders if Dean had a reason for choosing each of these songs. He thinks he must have. Maybe one day, Dean will tell him.

Cas doesn’t understand the purpose of this tape, he already knows many of these songs from his time in the Impala with Sam and Dean. Why Dean would choose to give him specifically a tape of his favorite Zeppelin songs, Cas can’t comprehend. He appreciates the gesture though. It’s a nice physical reminder to have of Dean while he’s away. Something that he hates to admit he yearns for more than he should.

The next few songs take a... different tone. Whole Lotta Love plays next, with it’s squealing guitar accompanied by Robert Plant’s voice, lyrics dripping in seduction.

  You've been learning

  Um baby I been learning

  All them good times baby, baby

  I've been year-yearning

  A-way, way down inside

  A-honey you need-ah

  I'm gonna give you my love, ah

  I'm gonna give you my love, ah oh

Cas has heard this song before, sprinkled throughout the few of Dean’s dreams he’s accidentally happened upon. It was always just shapes and shadows, what Cas saw, of Dean and another person engaged in sex, he always left the dreams as fast as he could. It didn’t seem right to intrude on Dean’s personal desires like that. But Cas did always think this was a very fitting song to have sex to.

The following song starts bluesy, a twangy guitar and when Robert Plant starts singing about lemons, Cas is... confused.

  Squeeze me baby, till the juice runs down my leg

  Squeeze me baby, till the juice runs down my leg

  The way you squeeze my lemon, ah

  I'm gonna fall right out of bed

Cas’ eyes widen at the lyrics, cheeks flushing.  Oh.   Unbidden images of Dean start flashing through his head, and Cas blinks a few times until they vanish. He moves his thigh a little, adjusting his pants and tightens his grip on the wheel, trying to focus on the beat of the song.

The last few songs have deeper lyrics, about love, about coming home, heartbreak, and Cas can see why Dean likes them. They mean a lot, but are good for the road, songs you can let wash over you again and again and never get tired of them.

A song Cas has never heard follows. It’s obviously still Zeppelin, but not something Cas would suspect Dean would enjoy. He pays particular attention to the lyrics of this one, even as he finds himself tapping along with his foot not pressed against the gas pedal.

  And the warmth of your smile starts a-burnin'

  And the thrill of your touch gives me fright

  And I'm shaking so much, really yearning

  Why don't you show up, make it all right?

  Yeah, it's all right.

  And if you promised you'd love so completely

  and you said you would always be true

  You swore that you would never leave me, baby:

  What ever happened to you?

He starts humming along, and contemplates the pining nature of the lyrics. It hits a little close to home, to how he feels for Dean, though he knows Dean has no idea of these feelings. He waits for the next song to calm his aching heart, but after the last few notes the tape cuts out and starts buzzing. And Cas is alone in an empty car again.

He takes in a breath, and is about to rewind the tape and play it again, when he remembers his promise to Dean, and instead tugs his phone out of his pocket.

Cas dials Dean, turns on the speaker and tosses the phone onto the passenger seat. It rings twice before Dean picks up.

“Hey Cas, what’s up?”

His tone is bright, and Cas smiles at the sound of his voice.

“I just finished the tape.”

“Yeah? What did you think?” Dean asks, there’s a tremor of uncertainty in his voice, so Cas doesn’t let Dean wait long for his answer.

“I loved it.”

“Yeah?” Dean answers, the smile in his voice clear, “Any favorites after the first go through?”

“Stairway to Heaven is... nice,” Cas says and Dean laughs. It sounds like bells ringing.

“I figured you’d say that.”

“I also thought Fool in the Rain was, powerful,” Cas continues. Dean intakes breath on the other end of the line.

“Why that one?”

“The sound was good, but I liked the lyrics. They held a lot of meaning.”

“Yeah,” Dean says, voice soft, “They do.”

Silence fills the empty space between them, and Cas notices his heartbeat has quickened for some reason.

“Where are you at?” Dean asks, clearing his throat.

“Four hours out, about halfway to Chicago.”

“Any good leads?”

“No, I’m just following instinct. Any hunts?”

“Nada, Sam’s looking though.”

“I hope you find something soon,” Cas answers and Dean murmurs a grunt of approval.

The silence should be awkward but it’s not, and the slight huff of Dean’s breath over the phone is comforting in the empty space of the passenger seat. It’s almost like Dean is there with him.

“You... you gonna be back soon?” Dean asks.

“I don’t know, I hope so,” Cas says.

“Yeah, me too.”

A sense of longing suddenly pierces Cas’ grace, and he barely manages to resist the urge to turn around and drive back to Lebanon.

“Hey, Cas?” Dean asks.

“Yeah?”

“Don’t keep m - us in the dark okay? Check in every once in awhile.”

“Okay,” Cas agrees with a small smile.

“Enjoy the tape,” Dean says, and Cas takes the fondness in Dean’s voice and uses it to stifle the ache of the longing within his chest.

“I will.”

“See ya, Cas.”

“Goodbye Dean.”

The phone clicks off and Cas steals a glance over at his phone just as Dean’s name flashes off the screen. He turns his gaze back towards the road, focusing on the white dashes stretching for miles ahead of him and tries to ignore the needing feeling deep within him that this is the opposite of what he should be doing right now.

He hits rewind on the tape. Whir. Click. Press play.

[latenightbotanist]

I have feelings about the ode to joy and im going to dump them on you

At the time i am writing this part i have suffered through twenty two (22) hours of “ode to joy” repeated in my brains so you are gonna suffer with me now. Srsly, ask @madgronkish i kinda lost it around noon.. Anyways. First thought when i heard it was literally" theyre not going to fucking reunite them to THAT SONG??!?!“ Whilst i was wrong about sherlock driving the car…they still did that. Thanks mofftiss.

Ok now down to business. First off, DISCLAIMER, i am in no way qualified to do this? I dont know much about music and have like half an experience at writing meta? so..sorry in advance, maybe just look at this as inspiration and well..gay feelings bc i have enough of those to go around rn.

I will also tag some lovely people who actually know how to do this whole meta thing, and who knows, maybe one of you actually reads this mess and makes somethin out of it? Possibly? Idk, i dont blame you if you dont, really. @quietlyprim @loudest-subtext-in-tv @joolabee @hudders-and-hiddles @love-in-mind-palace @teapotsubtext @beejohnlocked @kinklock @marcelock @gaytectives @ormondsacker @culverton

So.. for all of you who dont know, ode to joy (originally “freude, schöner götterfunken”) is part of beethoven’s 9th symphony, it is the first ever symphony to incorporate voices, the lyrics mostly come from schillers “Ode an die Freude” and the melody itself has been the european anthem since 1972 (1985 if you insist on EU).

Ok so lets have a quick look at the lyrics(and i really mean quick, these are my notes from this morning, not exactly coherent but enough to get a general idea of my feelings about this, we’ll get into more detail later) i also put both the english and german version bc i felt at some points things got lost in translation, but honestly i dont know what to do about that so yeah, if you speak german, good for you, if not and by the end if this youre not bored to death and still have questions dont hesitate to ask i will awkwardly but gladly try to elaborate (this applies not only to lyrics btw)

O Freunde, nicht diese Töne!


Sondern laßt uns angenehmere anstimmen,


und freudenvollere.

/

Oh friends, not these sounds!


Let us instead strike up more pleasing


and more joyful ones!

(Literally lets have happier stories, also the score.. yes lets get the johnlock theme back,please)

Freude!
Freude! / Joy!
Joy!

Freude, schöner Götterfunken


Tochter aus Elysium,


Wir betreten feuertrunken,


Himmlische, dein Heiligtum!


Deine Zauber binden wieder


Was die Mode streng geteilt;


Alle Menschen werden Brüder,


Wo dein sanfter Flügel weilt.

/ Joy, beautiful spark of divinity,


Daughter from Elysium, 

 
We enter, burning with fervour,             (Cant set the heart on fire if its

 
heavenly being, your sanctuary!              already burning w/ love, yall)


Your magic brings together 


what custom has sternly divided.               (Gayyyy!!!!!)


All men shall become brothers,           (Secret brothers,reunion…)


wherever your gentle wings hover.      

(Idk, mrs hudson is an angel?)

/

Wem der große Wurf gelungen,


Eines Freundes Freund zu sein;

 
Wer ein holdes Weib errungen,


Mische seinen Jubel ein!


Ja, wer auch nur eine Seele


Sein nennt auf dem Erdenrund

!
Und wer’s nie gekonnt, der stehle


Weinend sich aus diesem Bund!

/

Whoever has been lucky enough.         (Luckiest man in the world,


to become a friend to a friend,                 my only friend, … ) 

 Whoever has found a beloved wife,


let him join our songs of praise!               (Uh….how bout no?)


Yes, and anyone who can call one soul


his own on this earth!                                       (My john…..)


Any who cannot,

let them slink away
from this gathering in tears!   (Mary crying,then disappearing)

/

Freude trinken alle Wesen


An den Brüsten der Natur;


Alle Guten, alle Bösen


Folgen ihrer Rosenspur

.
Küsse gab sie uns und Reben,


Einen Freund, geprüft im Tod;*

(Like.. sherlock died and
 came back for john what more proof??)

 Wollust ward dem Wurm gegeben,

 
Und der Cherub steht vor Gott. 

Every creature drinks in joy


at nature’s breast;


Good and Bad alike


follow her trail of roses.                  (Good and bad, rosie, hmmmm)


She gives us kisses and wine,


a true friend, even in death;              (Or only in death?hey mary)


Even the worm was given desire,     (Mycroft? Nah,probs moriarty)


and the cherub stands before God.    (Sherlock, my lil cherub)

/

Froh, wie seine Sonnen fliegen

Durch des Himmels prächt'gen Plan,

 (Plans…ominous)


Laufet, Brüder, eure Bahn,

 
Freudig, wie ein Held zum Siegen.

Gladly, just as His suns hurtle


through the glorious universe,


So you, brothers, should run your course,             (the way it was always


joyfully, like a conquering hero.                                  meant to be…..) 

/

Seid umschlungen, Millionen!


Diesen Kuß der ganzen Welt!


Brüder, über’m Sternenzelt


Muß ein lieber Vater wohnen.


Ihr stürzt nieder, Millionen?


Ahnest du den Schöpfer, Welt?


Such’ ihn über’m Sternenzelt!


Über Sternen muß er wohnen.

/

Be embraced, you millions!


This kiss is for the whole world!             (,!!???? Like???????Yes pls)


Brothers, above the canopy of stars


must dwell a loving father.                                (Or two? Hey dads)


Do you bow down before Him, you millions?


Do you sense your Creator, o world?


Seek Him above the canopy of stars!


He must dwell beyond the stars.

Well that was……….. kinda gay. Yeah yeah i know its just a queer reading no i dont believe it was intended to be gay by either beethoven or schiller (or was it?? Irdk) but. in the context of the show. which is rather what were looking at. Pretty damn gay, right?

Ok lets have a look at my absolute favourite lines first:

Your magic brings together/what custom has sternly divided.

Well… i think we can all agree that society has, quite sternly indeed, divided holmes and watson, romantically. Homosexuality just simply wasnt a custom, or at least very frowned upon, mildly speaking. It is rather magical to watch this wrong being righted though, i should think. More specifically in bbc sherlock, the divide has come through a custom of not speaking to each other, and guess what?? Yeah hudders is friggin done with that bs these two are talking now!

And then…

Be embraced, you millions!/This kiss is for the whole world!

*shrieking* do i? Do i really need to talk about this? I think not. This just…. yeah. I mean really….. I would like to add at this point that, at least to my ears, embraced sounds like a rather tame option of translation. “Umschlungen”, to me personally conveys a certain vigour, almost as if the embrace might… idk.. come as a surprise to some extend? Take the air from some peoples lungs? Yeah dunno what that could be about……

If you still need more i guess i could just blubber some more about it all but tbh what is structure? so yeah, here we go, feel free to leave anytime i mean its already pretty gay and hurts my heart i wont blame you if you think 

•WE ARE NOW ENTERING THE REALM OF JOY… yep thats happening things are getting happy, please, god, let them actually. And this joy that we will feel when John and Sherlock ( finally) get together will mend all the wrong thats been done to those two, and us Holmes fans, during all these years of being kept apart by society and norms and customs, homophobia and heteronormativity. Were entering a sanctuary, we are literally save here!

•General message of schiller’s ode to joy is literally that HUMAN CONNECTIONS ARE THE CROWN OF HUMAN EXPERIENCE like wow yes thank you it is as if human connections were the stuff that…completes you as a human being. Say what? 

•Not only is this true for johnlock but also for our entire community, were bound together by the joy of this show, our joy will mend what heteronormativty destroyed, the joy of their kiss will unite us, we will embrace it and the joyfull gayness will embrace us! 

 •The fact that its literally such a groundbreaking piece of music. There have been symphonies over and over but this is new, this is different, he incorporated voices. Groundbreaking,earthshattering… u get it. Seriously if anyone who has even a slither of a clue about music wants to educate me on what the inclusion of voices could stand for please im begging enlighten me my brains too fried im already struggling to get this done(as you might be able to tell. I am so sorry)

 And now, onto some more shit i stumbled upon in the original poem that, sadly, didnt make it into the song but: 

•Have patience for a better world to come, god(mofftiss) is good and will give you what you deserve

•Forget hatred and revenge, forgive your (arch)enemy who shall not have to cry or be rueful (ahem mary. Also possibly mycroft to some extent who knows whats gonna happen) 

•Bravery even in agony,help where innocence is weeping (hi john) 

•Something about oaths and telling the truth to your friends as well as enemies and how lies will bring everything down…… 

•Narrowing the circle, making oaths with wine and staying faithful(keep believing!!) 

•Salvation from tyranns, hope to the dying, mercy in council, forgiving of sins and ENDING HELL well ok then yes to all! 

 No honestly theres a lot and im horrifically underqualified and have a headache so i’ll stop now. If you actually read this whole mess of a thing.. thank you. Bless your soul. I’ll make you an origami elephant or something

[theworstbob]

yellin’ at songs, week thirty-eight

takin’ some time to think ‘bout the songs what all debuted on billboard between on 27 september 1997, 29 september 2007, and 30 september 2017

spoiler this is extra salty, hoo boy pop music is bad and no one should like it

9.27.1997

2) "4 Seasons of Loneliness," by Boyz II Men

Yep. Yep, this is a '90s R&B slo jamz. Just a bunch of dudes singing gently about how epic and powerful some feeling is -- in this case, loneliness, which, if you were not aware, is the opposite of love. See, what makes loneliness so fascinating is, when you're in love, you're a two, right? But when you're an alone, you're a one. And if you're a one for long enough, you will eventually be alone through all four of the seasons -- winter, spring, summer, and of course, faultumln. What a brilliant job Boyz II Men do of portraying what it would be like to be single for a year.

29) "Everything," by Mary J. Blige

This is like a '90s R&B dude song from the female song. "You are my trusted friend/On you I can depend." First off, way not to end the lyric with a preposition, but also, I think I've heard that "friend/depend" from 1997 R&B dudes at least 20 times. "It never occurred to me the first time I saw your face/I would fall so deep in love, that your love can't be replaced." Face/Replace sounds new? But I wouldn't be surprised if it popped up here and there across '90s R&B. This is a bit bouncier and more upbeat than the R&B dude fare -- it's not overdramatic, it's Mary J. Blige revelling in love, so at least it has that going for it. It just doesn't feel like its own thing.

79) "Don't Go," by Le Click ft./Kayo

How come people who make dance music are so shitty at making hot dance tracks? Like, every EDM song in 2017 sounds like the apocalypse, and every dance song from 1997 is the saddest goddamned thing I've ever heard. "Don't go, my feeling can't be wrong." Now urrbody in the club gettin' desperate. Like what even is this, why are we putting this song in front of that "I'm Too Sexy" beat I can't stop hearing because Tay Tay ruined everything, why, why.

88) "Off the Books," by The Beatnuts ft./Big Punisher & Cuban Link

You know what, I didn't mind them. Everyone rapped well, and I appreciated a look at a life of crime that wasn't about drugs. You can also evade taxes, or launder money! Those are less fun crimes to commit than drugs, but they do the trick if you're out of drugs. I don't know how much of this song actually invovled money laundering, I just know the hook was "ain't nothin' but crooks in here/gettin' mad money off the books in here," and the song wasn't really worth paying attention to, so I'm just sort of hoping it was about the intricacies of money laundering.

90) "Love Is Alive," by 3rd Party

So OK this is just basic Euro stupidity CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE FUCKING AMAZON AD. CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE FUCKING AMAZON AD WHERE THE DOG WISHES IT COULD TALK TO THE HUMAN. What even is the song they use in that ad? How did they find it? Like did they commission a song specifically for that ad? That song had to be written for the ad. They filmed and edited the ad, went to a coffee shop three blocks from the office, and asked people to take two minutes to write a song about a dog that wishes it could talk to humans. It's the worst goddamn song in the world and I have to hear it 20 times a week until the ad campaign is over because of this stupid fucking thing I'm doing. That's not fair. That's not fair! Why would you increase the degree of difficulty? I know it's late in the game, it's not supposed to be easy, but you're supposed to let me win. "I wish I could ask you how was your day." YOU'RE A DOG. YOU WISH FOR MEATS, AND THE DAY YOU DIE WILL BE THE HAPPIEST BECAUSE THAT IS THE DAY YOU GET TO HAVE A CHOCOLATE SOMETHING.

9.29.2007

14) "Good Life," Kanye West ft./T-Pain

This song is ridiculous because Kanye eventually is inspired by T-Pain to use Auto-tune on himself and makes three miserable masterpieces that affect pop/hip-hop for a decade, and this song is like the bounciest most triumphant thing off Graduation. Like you can trace a direct line from this song, with its jubilant T-Pain line and that delightful "more ass than the models" drop, to Lil Uzi Vert, who makes boring songs about how dark his mind is.

61) "1, 2, 3, 4," Feist

For some reason the top YouTube search result for this song is not this song, but rather the Plain White T's song. I hate that this is my algorithm. Also we talked about lineages, and we talked about the Amazon ad, and you can draw a direct line from this song's surprising rise to popularity to that goddamned Amazon ad. We made a folksy indie artist popular, and a decade later, we have a folksy indie-sounding song about a dog staring at a human and saying "UNDERSTAND ME! WHY?????" Like I'm listening to this song, and I'm no longer hearing the Apple ad, I'm hearing Linda from corporate's ringtone, because Linda from corporate downloaded the song from the Amazon ad. "It makes me so happy when the puppy talks to the baby!" Guys I'm not well.

86) "Inconsolable," Backstreet Boys

I feel like I'm on the precipice of an amazing joke or insight but all my brain is doing is staring at the words "Twenty years of not understanding why they keep giving AJ solos." Hey you wanna hear something bonkers? Two of the Backstreet Boys hadn't turned 30 when this song had been released. How the fuck are you gonna be in your late 20s and making adult contemporary jams. How is your life this over before you're at least 32. Also one of the Backstreet Boys was 36 in 2007. Sir, you are a Backstreet Man. I don't know what your problems are, but I can see you have several.

88) "Do It," Nelly Furtado

I mean, it exists. Like it just sort of starts, and then it doesn't stop. I felt like I was listening to this song for 1000 years because it just kept saying "do it like you do it to me." Except like I'd imagine this person is doing it to Nelly Furtado, so I guess I just don't understand why she wouldn't just urge him to keep doin' it? But then the song just faded out, and I'm just here like, did I actually listen to something? Was I supposed to hear a story, is this, is this a rough draft? Did they intend on polishing this before the release? "So you released the album before you finished the last track! Big deal! Everyone makes mistakes, everyone has those days, as we are fond of saying in 2007! But we will be releasing this as a single so the whole world can hear what a bad job you did."

93) "I'm So Hood," DJ Khaled ft./T-Pain, Trick Daddy, Rick Ross & Piles

Oh, DJ Khaled group cuts, at least you're never awful. You might only whelm, and I might think Piles is just an absolute zero of a person, but it's typically pleasant to hear you when you appear. DJ Khaled: not the worst since 2007.

94) "Sweetest Girl (Dollar Bill)," Wyclef Jean ft./Akon, Lil' Wayne & Niia

This would be a really touching song if it sounded like anyone on this track had spent time thinking about what it means to be a sex worker. Like I'm not tryna get all tumblr here, it's just, there's so many societal forces which combine to force someone into stripping, and these dudes are just like, "She used to be so nice! Such a shame she's doing this thing. Stupid money!" Like no there's so much more to it than that. But I'm also not sure Lil Wayn is in tune with the day's social issues. Also, heck is Lil Wayn doing on this song? It kind of feels like Lil Wayn was 100% on board with strip clubs for most of his career. This song is an outlier. I don't think Lil Wayne really think it's a tragedy when someone turns to stripping.

95) "My Drink n' My 2 Step," Cassidy ft./Swizz Beatz

This song is surprisingly good and I'm actually angry that the song I think of when I think of Cassidy is "Hotel" and not this jam. Cassidy's pretty much a one-hit wonder, but this should've been the hit.

96) "Firecracker," Josh Turner

This is a cute song and Josh Turner hits some gonzo low notes, but mostly I'm now obsessed with this idea of some country dude at some point calling his dick a firecracker. Like, I think it's nice he's calling his girl a firecracker, but there's gotta be a country dude somewhere making a joke about "don't get hurt holdin' my firecracker!" right? Or maybe we could use the Southern man's propensity for getting himself injured playing with firecrackers as a euphemism for masturbation. I dunno. I'm ready to move on, but if anyone wants to start making a bro country album with me, I am willing to chase this dog.

99) "Me Enamora," Juanes

This kind of sounds like the fun Latin song on a 2016 Backstreet Boys album. Like, it just doesn't sound as fun or as exotic as the Latin pop explosion of 2017. I think I'm just reacting to the presence of a dude playing guitar in the video. Like, that's how you remove mystique from a person, is just strap a guitar around them. That tells you he's the sort of person who walks around telling people he's a "storyteller" and Bob stop now before you just 100% rip off "guitar guy at the party."

100) "Kiss Kiss," Chris Brown ft./T-Pain

hey guess what nope

30 September 2017

5) "Too Good at Goodbyes," by Sam Smith

at first i thought "i have sang this song before" in the first verse and i was all "hey, thanks for writing my review buddy!" 'cuz like no shit he's sang this song before, this is the only song sam smith has ever song, the only emotion sam smith has ever felt in all his life is "melancholy" and his songs are bland and without flavor as a result, they're just pointlessly sad, also i said fuck you at my computer when the choir kicked in, like seriously of goddamn course a choir, titanic was less predictable

44) "Dusk Till Dawn," by ZAYN ft./Sia

You know what kinda ticked me off about this song that I'm not sure should tick me off but whatever? The chorus, where Zayn goes "I'll be waiting for right he-e-e-e-eeee-ee-e-e-e-eeeeee-e heeee-e-e-e-e-eeee-e-eeeere?" Like what are you trying to do with that long note if you have to take a breath during the middle of it? That rest doesn't add any tension, it only serves to take people out of the song and say, "Why'd you stop singing, dude? It sounded like you were just gonna keep singing for a few seconds. You lack breath control? Is that it? Zero technical skill, ZAYN?" But it's entirely possible I'm the only person annoyed by that. And it's also possible I just wanted to be annoyed at something in particular, rather than just pointing at this song and shouting "BAD" like I did in the first draft. Because hoo boy, this ain't a hot one!

62) "Love So Soft," by Kelly Clarkson

OH GOD YES KELLY IS ON THE HORN BANDWAGON. I WAS SO READY FOR THOSE HORNS, I KNOW HOW POP MUSIC'S BEEN TRENDING THIS YEAR, I WAS WORRIED THIS WOULD JUST BE A BALLAD FROM THE TITLE, BUT THERE IS LIGHT HORNAGE and also this is the best Kelly song in years. The thing her voice does when she sings "it sure gonna cost YOU" is pure and it also does a million other things because it just flies around this song, Kelly Clarkson is flexing on all these young women who've got a vocal range of "whispering." The last few weeks, we've seen a good Kesha song, a good Demi song, and this Kelly Clarkson masterpiece, and I never wanna hear from goddamn Fifth Harmony ever again, not when the standard has been set.

73) "I'll Name the Dogs," by Blake Shelton

one of my favorite tweets of all time said, "would you like some traditional gender rolls? my wife made them while i was at work," and that is all i can think of most days, but also especially while listening to this song. "you find the spot and i'll find the money/you be the pretty and i be the funny." i am too logged on to ever accept this song.

80) "Found You," by Kane Brown

i would like to rescind my interest in kane brown for the time being. "what ifs" was intense, but this is knock-off sam hunt, which is itself akin to store-brand wheat thins. whatever about kane brown's vocal work on "what ifs" has completely vanished, he sort of rotates between three notes, and the lyrics are completely devoid of character, it's just, "it would have been sad if we never dated" over The Electric Drum Beat. i expected better, sir, but i hope you can be better.

81) "Gucci Gang," by Lil Pump

...Well, at least I only had to waste two minutes of my life listening to The Trap Song. At some point, these songs will be four measures long and instead of lyrics they'll just make the fun trill noises. Honestly, the trill noises? Very good. I love dudes are just going "brr!" and rolling their rs.

85) "No Limit," by G-Eazy ft./A$AP Rocky & Cardi B

You know what I like about Cardi B? This is G-Eazy's song, but Cardi B comes on the track to say, "Put a white boy on a song, I might turn G-Eazy out." In Cardi B's mind, this is her song, and while this is not Kendrick on "Control," given how awful G-Eazy's verse and how cringey Rocky's hook is, I'm willing to believe it. Still, I'm really excited for Cardi B as she increases in power and becomes more and more able to take songs from the main artist. But not this one, I don't wanna listen to this song again, it's super bad.

98) "Pills and Automobiles," by Chris Brown ft./Yo Gotti, A Boogie Wit da Hoodie & Kodak Black

Yeah, I'm all good on hearing about the things Chris Brown does in cars.

99) "Let Me Go," by Hailee Steinfeld & Alesso ft./Florida Georgia Line & watt

We've given the song from the Amazon ad about a dog that wishes it could interact with the baby a lot of guff, but at least I had a reaction to it, which is more than I can say for this song. Why are there so many people on this track? How did Florida Georgia Line even get here? What did they add to this song that literally any other male singer couldn't? A second, even more useless voice? Who is watt? Am I supposed to know who watt is already? This song is dumb. I'm going to listen to "Love So Soft" fifty times.

Who won the week?

I mean. No one? 1997 was all boring, 2007 had a very good song and an ok song (Cassidy made the third-best song I heard this week. Cassidy), and 2017 has an incredible song, and then I listened to things that weren’t good for an hour. I think 2017′s gonna get it because “Love So Soft” is a lock for the top ten, whereas “Good Life” probably doesn’t make the Top 20, jubilant and lovely as it is. So basically “Love So Soft” is Kevin Garnett on the Timberwolves, just dragging a bunch of scrublords into the playoffs.

1993: 13 2007: 12 2017: 13

Next week, 1997 presents us with Aaliyah, Fiona Apple, and everyone’s favorite way to fulfill the Rule of Three: The Kinleys! 2007 responds with James Blunt, so, y’know, that’s gonna be something we have to spend time thinking about. And 2017 will give us a sassy young woman belting over horns, a tropical beat from a DJ of note, a trap song with a thousand trills, Latin pop IF WE’RE LUCKY, a song by a member of One Direction, and content from a shitheel.

[i-am-very-very-tired]

NICOLE July 5, 2017 at 7:22 am Please stop using mental illness as an excuse to be an asshole. Mental illness does not force you to be horrible to people. Also remember Kanye was doing this long before his breakdown. Rap is built on beef so frankly I’m not surprised he came for Kanye. He came for his wife and by all gossip accounts Kimye are obsessed with Bey and Jay. 4:44 is pretty great and some of Jay’s best. It’s also more than this stupid beef MARIA F. July 5, 2017 at 7:31 am I totally agree. Maybe Kanye’s environment should have prevented him from performing in such a state, but of course, he is their cash cow. But even if he was not feeling well, Jay Z has the right to be offended by what was said. At the end of the day, i believe this is all about controversy and selling records. Everybody has been focused on that line since the album dropped. RENEE2 July 5, 2017 at 7:39 am Okay, Deriding people’s mental health issues is sh*tty and I don’t condone it. But I don’t understand why people are acting shocked at Jay-Z, as though he were of such staunch moral fiber before. The guy is smart, successful, and can be funny but he is also a mercenary, deeply misogynist, and frankly, more than a bit sleazy. I mean, people have heard his rhymes about women, right? Not to mention his profligate use of the nword. Dude is hardly PC. Kanye is also a douche. Again, how many times has he been offensive. This is another misogynist, and one who has used homophobic slurs in his rhymes although he professes to be queer positive. We’re supposed to forget all that because we now deem him to have mental health issues??? As Nicole stated, we should not give him a pass just because he is not well, dude is an *sshole, plain and simple. NICOLE July 5, 2017 at 7:49 am Exactly. People act like having a mental illness is a magic wand that makes people forgive and forget what you did easily. That’s not how that works. It doesn’t erase why you did or how people felt because of your actions. I tell clients this all the time. You cannot control how people react to you. Being mentally ill may give them a framework for more understanding but again it does not erase the action. And Kanye was an ass before this. So yep. DEM July 5, 2017 at 8:13 am “he is also a mercenary, deeply misogynist, and frankly, more than a bit sleazy. I mean, people have heard his rhymes about women, right?” Jay Zs lyrics on women are actually among the least misogynist of the genre. Two weeks ago we had an Eminem post and not only was there no mention of his violent lyrics against women, it was filled with “he is so cute” comments. And my post on his lyrics some of which threaten a specific woman by name were moderated out. But here we are, the instant the subject is a black dude…. Its “dude is hardly PC”. “Not to mention his profligate use of the nword”…..lmao As if the N-er word was not already on the tips of white tongues. Yes’ its the song about black people in Paris and not white peoples unadulterated hate thats the problem. Those black people who dont wish to reclaim ithe word are entitled to that opinion and should just not use it. I stand firmly and proudly in the reclaim camp. This site reclaims “bitchy”, gay people reclaim the F word and Its not your business that black men and women have reclaimed the N word. RENEE2 July 5, 2017 at 8:32 am @DEM, I can’t tell if you are trolling (I think you probably are) or not but here goes: 1) The point that I was making was that BOTH Jay-Z and Kanye have used problematic language so we shouldn’t be shocked if that Jay is being insensitive in this instance, nor should we necessarily be sympathetic to Ye in this instance because he has a history or being an insensitive clod too. 2) I can’t comment on the Eminem thread as I am also not here for that trick for numerous reasons, including his misogyny, so uh, nice try 3) Though I wasn’t critiquing Jay’s use of the nword, but rather was saying that his use of it demonstrates that he does not subscribe to notions of what is considered to be acceptable, I am also not here for that term. It is ugly, it is violent, and I don’t think that it’s something that Black people need to reclaim. I don’t know how you got that I was not Black from my comments but I am so you can step off with telling how I should feel about. ERINN July 5, 2017 at 8:47 am Dem - I know Em has been called out plenty on this site. He hasn’t gotten a big magical pass by any means. I don’t actually think I saw the recent Em post – and I’ve been on this site for like 5 years or more. Some posts slip through the cracks, or people are busy, or whatever. Personally I think Em is incredibly talented – but also someone who grew up with a really f—ed up life. It doesn’t excuse his behavior as an adult, but I also don’t look at him and think “he had every chance, and a healthy relationship with women, why is he talking this shit”. He was a mess, he’s gotten a lot better about certain things, but the Slim persona is played up so much, and a lot of awful things are said across so many categories. I tend to think of Jay similarly. He got dealt a sh-t hand growing up – he pulled himself up, but unfortunately his lyrics still are incredibly problematic at times. He’s still incredibly talented, and I don’t think his lyrics are an exact display of who he is as a person. I think most artists exaggerate like crazy and try to keep a persona kind of separate from their real life, but it doesn’t mean that it’s ‘okay’ that they say the things they do. I’m not writing him off as a person because of it though. As long as there is growth happening – that’s great. But if they suddenly devolve into a much worse place, then I’m going to have to stop supporting them as artists. KONFUSED July 5, 2017 at 9:28 am @Renee2 whether you are black or not is irrelevant when you say “I don’t think that it’s something that Black people need to reclaim”..you should step off on telling other people how you feel about their use of the N-word it really doesn’t matter if you approve of it or not SANDERS July 5, 2017 at 9:58 am Nicole, from previous posts including this one, it sounds like you are a therapist. I’m surprised you are minimizing JayZ use of words crazy and insane to describe someone with a mental illness. Of course people with a mental illness have to examine their behaviours and coping strategies etc, though in the midst of a breakdown, self awareness takes a back seat. Lets also hold JayZ responsible for his mocking of people with mental health issues and I encourage you to check out the excellent comments from Claire down below. Me= If she's a therapist, I don't want her as mine. She probably works for talkspace? RENEE2 July 5, 2017 at 10:56 am @ KONFUSED Why should I step off telling a poster how I feel about the word when said poster is putting words in my mouth and twisting what I wrote? And again, the reason that I mentioned my racial identity was because the poster stated that I wasn’t in a position to comment on Jay Z’s use of the nword because they assumed I was not Black. Everyone comes here to offer an opinion and get on our respective soapboxes so GTFO with telling me not to share my thoughts on a topic. BRIDGET July 5, 2017 at 11:20 am @Konfused – you’re coming off like you don’t actually have something to say and just want to be mean to someone to make yourself feel better. RENEE2 July 5, 2017 at 11:53 am @KONFUSED Yep, that’s me, the proverbial angry Black woman, lol. Hope it’s not too damp where you’re stationed under the bridge. @ Bridget, Thank you!! IDONTKNOWYOUYOUDONTKNOWME July 5, 2017 at 2:05 pm Well, for example borderline disorder and what is perceived as “a-holeish behavior” kindof come hand in hand RONALDINHIO July 5, 2017 at 5:03 pm Whilst you are all saying mental ill health doesn’t give you a pass I’m gonna have to stop ya Many of the behaviours that West exhibited could be signs of a growing mania and paranoia that could present or exist co morbidly with and anxiety disorder or depressive illness. As reported he may have bi polar disorder which might not have been accurately medicated. All or none of these things may have been his actual disorder and all may have been exacerbated by lack of sleep and over work. His grandiosity, rambling, hyper activity, sensitivity moving into paranoia psychosis or mania all sounds like it could be easily described by a mental health disorder. Ignoring the lack of control someone has during an episode of mental ill health or trying to blame them when they often have little control is poor form. LLAMAS July 5, 2017 at 10:51 pm Sick. I have BPD and have never been described as an a**hole. People with BOD treat themselves the worst. FLORC July 5, 2017 at 7:04 pm And being a jerk can be a sign of mental illness. You cannot know either way unless you are much much closer than a commenter here. Im reserving judgement. Kanye is outrageous a lot of the time and shows erratic behavior, but also has appeared to have experienced some incredibly traumatic events. That doesn’t get healed easily if ever.