#his use of having a smaller audience than tubbo

[mosscloakenthusiast]

jack manifold perfectly uses the multi-pov format of the dream smp to create a villain who’s motives are clear and who you can genuinely root for while understanding what he’s doing is Bad in this essay i will-

[the-arctic-commune]

Belief and Activism in Media

Or, why Technoblade is the villain.

Before we get started, I want to acknowledge my debts. I owe the seed of this post to.... someone. Probably at least a year and a half ago, a post in Techno’s tags about this topic is what got me thinking about it. I particularly owe that poster for linking this wonderful article [x], which dives into the topic with more detail and broader scope. I highly recommend reading it if you’re interested. However, that was, as I say, many months ago, and I have no idea who the poster was. So if this topic seems familiar to you, please let me know so I can give credit where it’s due!

Now, let’s set the stage. I brought this up in relation to the Red Festival. In particular to the climax of the Festival, in which Technoblade, under threat by Schlatt and his administration, was forced to kill his ally Tubbo.

This was, shall we say.... controversial.

Both within the server and without. Tommy fought with Techno over the murder/execution multiple times (strangely, perhaps, Tommy was much more distraught than Tubbo in the immediate aftermath, but that’s a different post), and it was still being brought up as late as the “Rescuing Michael” streams, when Technoblade apologized to Tubbo for the incident. The fandom, meanwhile, has spilled a great deal of ink discussing whether this was an acceptable or even justified action on Technoblade’s part.

In relation to this incident, and more broadly to the often-controversial actions of Technoblade and his fellow anarchists on the server, I think there’s a very interesting way to understand why many people were (/are) so vehemently adamant that Techno made the wrong decision.

Anarchy, you see, is villain-coded.

(This post is going to be heavily discussing mainstream media in the US, particularly media produced by Hollywood, Disney, and related giants. If you go to smaller producers or other cultures, you will certainly find plenty of counter-examples to what I’m about to say, but hopefully we can all agree that Hollywood has a big impact on what many English speaking audiences expect from stories and media, and that this is a big portion of the Dream SMP audience.)

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Part 1: Activism Is Evil

The article I linked above is “Outlaw Kings and Rebellion Chic,” by Alister MacQuarrie for the New Socialist on March 27, 2019. It discusses the phenomenon of the non-ideological hero.

Mainstream media loves rebellion, but it doesn’t want to discuss why we rebel. Heroes rarely have a defined cause, ideology, or even plan for the future once tyranny is overthrown. Instead their motivations are vague notions of “freedom” and “justice,” defined mostly by how the villain is preventing them, and their greatest victory is a promise of return to “normalcy,” a presumably-democratic and prosperous society but we don’t have to get into the details.

Villains, in contrast, often do have a defined ideology. In common storytelling wisdom, heroes only react; it’s the villains who provoke them by acting, and thus the villains who need a cause to fight for or an ideology to drive them.

Ideology, then - the simple fact of having beliefs about the society and politics around you - becomes a feature of villains, while heroes promote an artificially constructed non-ideology, a vague liberal-centrist position which licenses reaction but not action and tolerates change only insofar as it doesn’t make anyone uncomfortable.

You see this in the trope of the activist who goes too far - a side character who the hero must prevent from causing harm, because they care too much about their cause and, depending on the story, may be willing to sacrifice life or morality to get it. You also see it more prominently in the trope of the villain who has a completely rational reason to want to tear the system down - and also is totally ok with murdering babies and kicking dogs, so the story doesn’t have to engage with their philosophy and it’s fine to just kill ‘em and leave things the way they are. To “engage” with current activist movements, issues of climate change are filtered through the ecoterrorist; issues of racial justice are filtered through the extremist or separatist; and so on and so forth.

“The Legend of Korra” is possibly the most absurd example of this trope in popular media. Multiple season villains in this TV show are activists whose ideology is then twisted into cartoonish evil in order to avoid actually engaging with the critiques they present.

The Season 1 villain is Amon, leader of the Equalist movement. He and his followers critique their society’s prioritization of benders (in-universe magic users); benders preferentially control the government and military and even, due to their unique skills, have access to job opportunities that non-benders are barred from. This leads to non-benders having little say in society and being more likely to live in poverty; the Equalists want to change this.

Also they commit multiple acts of terrorism and kidnap benders to forcibly strip them of their powers. And Amon is actually secretly a water bender which means he’s a hypocrite and we don’t have to listen to him anyways. The Equalists are defeated and the problem of non-bender inequality is never mentioned again.

Season 3 introduces Zaheer and his fellow anarchists. They fight for freedom and wish to tear down the governments of their world; they assassinate at least one major world leader. Also they want to brutally torture the protagonist Korra to death. For, uh, reasons. Anarchy! Once they’re defeated discussions of freedom and tyranny are completely dropped; oppressive empires are good because anarchists are worse.

So hopefully you see what I mean. In mainstream media, belief and activism are the domain of villains, and thus they are villainized.

A character who comes onscreen speaking of tyranny and revolution is not to be trusted. If someone cares enough about their ideology to become an activist and fight for it, they’re almost certainly the bad guy.

And, to the vague change-averse liberalism that Hollywood likes to project, few ideologies are quite so ideological as that of the radical anarchist.

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Part 2: Compromise Is Never An Option

Ok, so you can probably see the seeds of what I’m arguing here, but there is one slightly tangential point that’s important to bring in. Because there are things that the “non-ideological” hero is allowed to fight for: life and friendship.

These are usually supposed to be the highest priorities of the hero, and I’m not saying that’s a bad thing! Heroes fight to keep people safe, especially their friends, and they don’t compromise. One for all and all for one; we don’t trade lives.

No matter how hopeless the odds, heroes are supposed to keep fighting, and they must refuse to sacrifice for their victory (unless it’s self-sacrifice, which is usually ok). This is what motivates them in absence of any more sophisticated ideology; the villain kills or threatens people, so the hero defends them.

In “Star Trek,” Spock repeatedly insists on the Vulcan adage that the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few. This is treated as cold and alien, and is something he’s supposed to give up as he learns to value and rely on his friends. It’s all right when it’s self-sacrifice (Spock subjects himself to lethal radiation to save the ship), but it’s not all right when it sacrifices others (the rest of the crew rejects Spock’s concerns when they decide to risk their entire ship for the sake of a few crew members).

In “Star Wars,” Lando Calrissian betrays the heroes to Darth Vader. He does this because he’s responsible for an entire city. Darth Vader and his Empire have threatened Cloud City if he doesn’t comply, and they are far too powerful for Cloud City to fight off on its own. Lando can betray his friends, or he can let millions of his citizens die. The choice, though hard, seems obvious, but the narrative still treats it as an unconscionable betrayal. It’s only once he seems to truly regret his actions - and thus to, at least tacitly, admit that he should have let his city die rather than betray his friends - that he can be redeemed.

So: heroes don’t sacrifice, and they don’t compromise. They’re supposed to always keep fighting, no matter the odds. After all, they’re in a story. Victory will come, no matter how improbable.

Right?

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Part 3: Technoblade’s an Anarchist

When he first logged onto the Dream SMP, Techno (IRL) had a plan. He needed a way to fit himself into the narrative, distinguish his character, and explain his presence in the story. So he decided that he would play an anarchist, someone who had come to support his friends in their fight against Manburg’s tyranny.

This started out as a pretty media-typical portrayal of anarchy as an unprincipled “the strong survive” approach (see his pitch to BBH), but quickly evolved into an actual, principled, self-consistent ideology, as IRL Technoblade seems to have taken an interest in the philosophy.

Genuinely, Technoblade’s portrayal is probably one of the best depictions of anarchist politics I’ve ever seen in popular media. But most people’s expectations are based on the caricature of the philosophy that is usually presented, and the one he started with.

So I argue that many people were simply primed to assume that Techno was, narratively speaking, a bad guy. He wasn’t solely fighting for Wilbur or Tommy - he was fighting for their cause. He had beliefs to fight for outside of his loyalty. And in the tropes of popular media, that made him suspicious.

(Of course, in one sense this is correct! He did end up abandoning the Pogtopians when their victory put them in power, and thus in conflict with his ideals.)

At the Red Festival, killing Tubbo a was an indefensible act not because killing in general is wrong (that would be pacifism and thus ideological and suspicious), but because it wasn’t the act of a hero. A hero would have found a different way. No one ever seems to be able to say what that “different way” should have actually been, but it doesn’t matter: our sense of narrative justice says that there must have been one because it’s what a hero would do. It doesn’t matter that, in-character, Technoblade has no idea he’s a hero; he should operate like one, and he’ll make an incredible last-minute escape because that’s how stories go. How the story does go is replaced with how the story should go. Never mind that in MCRP a single misclick could completely upend such a story.

.

So Technoblade gets double strikes. First, he’s an “activist,” which is narratively suspicious. Second, he doesn’t operate as a hero (at least early on), placing no trust in deus ex machina to save him and his friends.

In the language of narrative tropes, Technoblade is “villain-coded,” especially prior to his “retirement arc.” His actions at the Red Festival are particularly villainous, both because he, essentially, gives up and because he expects his friends to share his dedication to their cause.

That makes it quite easy to end the analysis with Techno as the bad guy!

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To be clear, though it’s probably been clear throughout, I’ll end by saying that this isn’t a perspective I agree with. The media’s vilification of activism is something I greatly dislike. Technoblade as a hero with a radical cause is an enormous part of why I liked his DSMP story so much.

[virginmiri99]

Insider anon calling in, here with the show and trusting Tommycrit & Co with it

To start off very general I had a great time, it was very genuinely entertaining and there wasn't a moment where attention or energy was lost. On the technical side it was well paced with a followable structure and characters you did get invested in as silly they were. The audience energy was good and well commanded, and though there were some issues with people staff did get involved. I feel like the way I'm going to describe it won't do it justice obviously because live shows are live for a reason and my memory is awful, but here's the skeleton of it all

(There were two acts, the first act ends after the explanation of the events during the doxxing and the second act starts off with them dealing with it. I'll split the asks to keep the doxxing story in one piece.)

The First act! (- doxxing story)

Slimecicle introduced the show over a video montage, with the joke that he was being held at gunpoint to praise Tommy in absurd ways, it was a great build up to Tommy's show 'character', which entered on stage soon after (surprisingly he was the only one who seemed different in person, or at least seemed smaller than I thought). His character in this is the grandeous, egotistical money-focused persona he tends to draw on hyped to the max (an insane amount of stage presence and full use of his body and exaggerated expressions, I feel like no matter where you sat nothing was lost in translation). The entire show is initially presented as a step-guide on how to be rich and successful and sexy like him - aka. you have to be him, and the steps are consequently a life story (the actual meta reason and purpose of the show does get stated out loud later on). There's alot of crude humour throughout the show and I'd say most of it landed for me personally. There was never a joke in general didn't receive a good response which is great for such a heavily packed live show where there's usually one or two that miss the mark, but seeing certain parents faces in response to the joke poking at Christians was funny in its own right.

As you can imagine, the life story starts off in the, that's right, the womb, where he was planning his potential and success, only for Jack, playing his dad, to come in and tell an unsurprising, embarrassing birth story. Jack's 'dad' character is also the same old man persona he uses alot, the one haunted by war crimes in 'Nam and ever disappointed in his son, so, nothing like Iain at all (maybe the comment about Tubbo being Tommy's boyfriend came from a real place). The running bit in the show being his refusal to hug Tommy (Tommy's actual dad being on the sidelines of the stage the entire time and having helped write the script added to the experience in retrospect). The dad character sort of plays the 'realist' and the downbeat character, with alot of dry humour and directly addressing the audience while also being just as exaggerated as Tom's - got most of the parents laughs.

Then we get the wonderful introduction of Binda, as played by Freddie Badlinu, who is the character of a literal stuffed dog Iain bought when Tommy was a baby and back when they were genuinely pretty poor (also alot of humour about wealth and class which landed great with a British audience, it'd be interesting to see with an American one). Binda as a character is very childlike, and is bullied by the other characters for it, often being sent off stage (much to the audience's sympathy and 'aww's). Pretty much a metaphor for childhood and innocence in the show, being the angel on Tom's shoulder and a great contrast to the two other characters. There was an introduction song (Freddie does have a brilliant singing voice!) and a dance sequence as is theatre requirement (it stretched a few beats too long but nothing too painful).

This continues with a few more stories (these stories are presented as 'oh woe look at these hardships it took to get where I am!' before cutting to an entirely minimal and embarrassing childhood story), how he had to be his own bully because he was a lonely child (Jack, also playing Tommy's mum throughout this with a simply longer wig), how he fought off a monster aka. Betty (A massive two-person puppet of a hound was used before the actual photo of Tommy and Betty as a puppy was shown, it was a genuinely an amazing puppet prop) etc. I'm not doing this part much justice in description because there was a fair amount and it played 'build-up'.

From this it leads onto the introduction of minecraft in his life, and the story of the hammock collar-bone breaking incident, as preformed by puppets in a prerecorded video! (Tommy suits puppetry concerningly well.) He goes on to explain the switch from Twitch streaming to YouTube after being inspired by YouTubers such as Captain Sparkles and DanTDM (big applause, though Technoblade got the biggest) and then the downfall after being told he had to study for GCSEs (there's alot of humour of Tommy being rude to his parents and it going poorly, being either physically threatened or threatened in the 'British mum' way, which the mum I was sat next to found very funny in particular).

And then we get Covid! This part landed very well humour beat wise and the photo shown of the moment Tom and Sarah found out GCSE's were cancelled was borderline renaissance (elation vs. horror-shock.)

YouTube goes great (as we know), dsmp mention (not as big a portion of the show as one might expect, barely mentioned after this) and the shows leads onto the first time Tommy goes to Brighton, again in a prerecorded puppet video and song! Puppets of Tom, Iain (?), Wilbur, Niki, Fundy, Philza, and Kristin were the main ones used, and all of them bar from Fundy and Iain sung a part in the song! Tommy's singing voice sounds incredibly young I will say, not as in unpracticed or unskilled at all, just generally young like some of his older singing clips - for some reason I thought it'd changed more.

There's also a part talking about lawyers and the wacky things such as having to copyright his own face, which lead to another song as by Freddie Badlinu in a Better Call Saul inspired outfit (my favourite of the songs Freddie sang, very familiar to another production but I can't put a finger on which one).

Up until this point the story arc of the show has been on a solid positive incline which no really conflict, and the tone has only been humourous if not absurd. At this point Tommy alludes to things going to shit and to the point of wanting to quit, and the title card behind Tommy begins to decay in a block by block fashion. This is the start of Tommy's character dropping the act and instead acting desperate and upset, as he begs vaguely for what is happening to stop (leading onto the doxxing part of the show...)

[PART 1]

Maybe I'm just on my period but this first part to the show is legit making me tear up rn this sounds so well put together and a great experience I'm genuinely impressed just reading your TLDR of it. It sounds like it blends together seamlessly and I'm just honestly proud with what they managed to create. Awesome.

[raindownforme]

When

Charlie Slimecicle x reader [they/them used]

They stared at the box in front of them. In it was a camera that would easily hook up to their computer. It would easily record with OBS. It would easily reveal what they looked like to thousands of people, including their closest friends.

“You don’t have to you know.”

“I know Wilbur. I mean I want to.”

“Then why not?”

“What if they’re disappointed?” y/n poked at the box. “What if they thought my eyes would be a different shape and my nose would be smaller or my hair was a different length or color-“

“You don’t have to worry about that. You look like you. That’s all.”

“Yeah but they don’t know what me looks like. They just see the animated icon and they’re used to it.”

“You don’t have to start fast. You could do a little bit at a time. You could show, I don’t know, me, or Phil, or Niki first.”

y/n sighed and turned back to their monitors. One had discord pulled up, where they were in a call with Wilbur, one had a paused spotify playlist, and one had the instructions for installing the camera. “I could start with you.”

They could hear Wilbur clapping on the line. “Yeah! Let’s get it goin!”

The two kept talking as y/n installed the camera. Not before long it was ready to go.

“Okay. All you have to do is turn it on. Here I’ll do mine.” Wilbur’s face flickered to life on the front monitor.

“Okay. Just a second.” They looked at the mirror next to their desk and frowned. Maybe they could’ve done their hair a bit different. Or they could’ve worn a different shirt. Maybe some mascara? Would that be what Wilbur was expecting?

“Come on! I’m excited now.”

y/n nodded and pressed it on. They stared at the monitor, watching their face show up. Wilbur gasped a bit and stared at it. “What? Is it alright?”

“I owe Charlie money. He said your eyes would be a different color.” y/n felt their face flush and looked down at their keyboard. Wilbur laughed and smiled at them. “I can see you get embarrassed! Oh this is so cool!”

“I’m gonna turn this shit off.”

“No no! Keep it I like it. Here wait smile.” They smiled at him and he cheered again. “That is exactly how I thought you’d smile! Oh I’m so good at this.”

They both laughed together, but stopped when a ringing noise came through discord. Tommy and Tubbo were calling. “Wilbur, I-“

“Hey, it’s okay.” The ringing kept going. “If you’re not ready you can turn it off. If you are then we pick up. Which is it?”

y/n paused, holding their breath, then picked up the call. Everyone’s icons came onto the screen, then they all slowly turned the cameras on.

“Sorry didn’t realize we’d have- wait who’s that.” Tubbo moved closer to his screen, as If studying what he was looking at.

“Is that y/n?” Tommy stared wide-eyed as they nodded. He began cheering as did Tubbo. “FUCK YEAH! FUCKING POGGERS- sorry mum. What-“

Tommy walked off from his chair and y/n laughed at him. They looked up at Tubbo and saw him smiling. “What?”

“That’s not how I thought you’d look at all! Does anyone else know?”

“No just you three. I had just showed Wilbur when you two showed up.”

“We should show Philza! Or Niki! She would love to see this.”

“y/n doesn’t have to show anyone they don’t want to.” Wilbur’s voice was cautionary, but they just shrugged.

“Maybe it would be alright. We should start with Niki.”

“Yeahhhhh!!” Tommy cheered as Wilbur went to ring her. It only rang a few times before Niki joined. She turned her camera on and began talking about something or other, but paused and looked back at discord.

“Who’s on y/n’s account?”

“I am.”

“Oh. Oh! y/n......” She dragged out the name as she stared on. “Awe, you’re cute! I love it.”

“Right? I wasn’t expecting it but look!” Wilbur gestures to his screen with an exaggerated smile.

“Philza’s next right? Let’s get him on!”Tommy seemed overly enthusiastic for the reveal to the group father figure, but y/n was excited too.

“Do it! I wanna know what he thinks.”

It rang for about a minute before Philza answered. He didn’t turn on his camera though. He sat there in silence.

“Phil? You there?” Tommy leaned in closer to the camera.

“y/n? Is that what y/n looks like?”

“Hey Phil!”

“Oh my god! Wait can I show Kristin?”

“Of course!”

He called his wife into the room and everyone heard her gasp. “Oh you’re so pretty y/n.”

“Philza I’m going to steal your wife.”

“Okay that’s enough.” Kristen chuckled as Philza took the headset back. “Maybe I don’t get divorced today.”

The group laughed and fell into a comfortable silence. y/n wasn’t sure what to do. “It’s weird being able to like. Smile at you guys and stuff.”

“I’m sure you’ll get used to it. It’s like face time. You can leave it on when you play games or you’re streaming, and only we can see if it help you get adjusted.”

“Yeah!!! You get used to us you get used to everyone.” y/n laughed at tubbo’s excitement.

Tommy rubbed his hands together. “Who we showing next? Charlie?”

y/n tried to keep her composure but still felt her face fall a bit. The idea of showing Charlie was terrifying. Probably more so than showing her audience. Charlie had no idea what they looked like, but they knew what Charlie looked like. They knew his laugh and his smile and that they absolutely adored it. But if Charlie saw what they looked like? What their smile looked like and their laugh? Their eyes and their nose and everything else, would he like it? Would he treat them the same?

“y/n?” They snapped their head up at Wilbur’s voice. “Are you okay?”

“Yep!” They forced a fake smile and Wilbur frowned.

“Is there a problem with showing Charlie?”

They didn’t want to talk about this in front of everyone. Having a crush on Charlie was one thing. They’d had feelings for him for a long time now. But they hadn’t admitted to it. Ever. “I think I’m alright with just you guys for now.”

“That sucks. He just asked to call.” Tommy was glancing away at other monitors.

y/n stared blankly at the computer in front of themself. “You guys go ahead I think I’m gonna go.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah. I’ll come back on in a bit and play. I just need to do a few things.”

Wilbur furrowed his brow. “Alright. I’ll see you in a bit then.”

y/n nodded and their face disappeared from the screen. It was quickly replaced by Charlie’s.

“Hey goofy gamers what’s up?” He smiled as he turned on his face cam, but was only met by a crowd of confused or disappointed looking people.

“y/n was on just now.”

“What they were?” Charlie sat up quickly and smoothed his hair down, blushing horribly. “I- are they coming back or-? What were you-? Wait, why-?”

“She bought a camera and did a face reveal for us.” Wilbur fiddled with a pen between his fingers.

“Oh that’s so cool! Tell me what they look like! Are they pretty? Wait, are you allowed to tell me? Did I win my bet?”

“You won your bet. Charlie I think they’re afraid to show you.”

“Why? I’m gonna love them no matter what it is.” Everyone froze as the gears clicked in Charlie’s head. Tommy and Tubbo, the children the are, did a terrible job at trying to not laugh at Charlie. “Love it! Their face! I bet it looks great I’ll love their face! Wait that’s just as-“

“You have crush! You have a crush!” Tommy started yelling as Charlie tried to gesture at him to shut up. “You love y/n! I’m gonna tell them!”

“Listen I will fly across this goddamn ocean and kill you-“

“I think it’s cute.” Phil tried to speak up over the sound of the children.

“Me too! If anything they like you too.”

Charlie paused and stared at the monitor, his face growing redder by the second. “They do?”

Wilbur nodded. “Charlie, trust me they do.”

He smiled to himself. “Uh. We should- uhm. Minecraft gamer time.”

“Charlie? Are you-“

“Processing.” He cut Wilbur short. “Planning. Proceeding. Gamer.”

“Gamer.” Tommy echoed the flustered boy.

“Gamer.” Charlie booted up the Minecraft world and examined his wooden house. He bounced his game character over to y/n’s house. When they had joined the game they had picked to be a shulk, so they lived in a dug out home near the Pube.

Charlie’s character ran into the cave home. It was quite lovely for what it was; wooden floors with support beams and plants everywhere. There were pots on the floors and on the shelves and vines from the ceiling. As he looked around the room he felt the gears clicking in his head. Knowing exactly what to do.

A few hours later, y/n signed back into discord. They could see a few people being active in solo vc’s, including Charlie. They did their best to ignore it, simply moving on to open Mojang. They logged themself into the Origins SMP server and checked around where they were. They had last logged off in Wilbur’s house, so they were very ready to move around when they got a set of private messages from Charlie.

Are you streaming?

y/n didn’t hesitate in saying no. It was an honest response. They had only logged on today in the hopes of grinding towards gathering ores and other basic needs. But if Charlie needed something, who were they to say no?

Can you meet me at your house?

y/n responded and went on their way towards the familiar cave. It wasn’t a long walk. They were there soon and were greeted by a closed door and a sign telling them to join Charlie’s VC.

“Hello? Charlie?”

Looking over at discord, they watched as Charlie’s camera turned on. He was sitting in his streaming room wearing a blue button-down shirt with short sleeves. “Hey, uhm, so, I wanted to say something before you go in your house.”

“If I go in will you be there?”

“Well yeah but-“ y/n opened the door and gasped. The entirety of their floor was made into grass and there were flowers blooming everywhere. Every single floor block had been made grass, actually.

“Charlie, how did you do this?”

“Well, bonemeal, and some Ranboo help.”

“Charlie, it’s gorgeous. Aww, and the flowers…” They just now noticed that most of the flowers in the room were their favorite - blue cornflowers.

“Yeah! I just,” Charlie took a deep breath. “I wanted to say that I know you don’t think I want to see you or that I wouldn’t like what I see, but I know that I would feel the same way about you as I did this morning, or yesterday, or four months ago. Because it’s you, and I’ll always feel the way I feel about you. But, until you feel comfortable, I’ll be here. waiting.”

They sighed, making sure their camera was plugged in before they turned it on. “Charlie, this is the sweetest thing.”

“Oh fuck.”

The two of them seemed to freeze. Charlie looked mortified, his face pink as can be, while y/n looked incredibly confused. “I’m sorry, what-?”

“No no no you’re just really pretty.” The words spilled from Charlie’s mouth faster than they’d ever been. “Like gorgeous. Top tier. 10/10. On God. Have I told you I’m in love with you-? Your face! In love with your face! Please tell me this is going well.”

y/n giggled. “So you’re in love with me now?”

Charlie sputtered, stumbling over his words. “No-! Maybe, I- that’s not what I meant-“

“Charlie it’s okay.”

He paused, pointing at his own chest. “You? Me you? You do? Me?” y/n nodded and watched as Charlie threw himself backwards cheering. “SHIT-“

“Charlie?”

“Yes! Yes I’m here I’m here for all of this. Oh my god I’m so happy.” y/n watched Charlie’s Minecraft character dance around and jump. “Oh my god. Oh my god! Wait does this mean I can meet you now? If I meet you can I kiss you? Please?”

“When I meet you, you can kiss me all you want.”

“When? When!” They watched Charlie’s camera as he got up and danced around. He stopped and dashed back to the camera, getting absurdly close. “I love you. I can’t wait for when.”

[5uptic]

I just think it's sad that people made the cupduo cooking stream more about ranboo than them. I mean chat constantly spamming 'feed ranboo' 'where is ranboo' and stuff. Even the most liked stuffs are about him :")) I understand though, he has a big following. But I wished people recognised the cupduo dynamic more especially beacause they have such an amazing one.

i know you sent this a while ago so maybe it's kind of not really relevant to reply to this, but i... digress? maybe i am in a bit of a bubble but i didn't see anyone making it about ranboo. and, to be honest... i've gone through this issue in other fandoms, where some people complain that there isn't enough content of x or y thing/person and that there should be more, and sometimes that comes with jabs against another thing/person. and from all those instances i've come out from it with the same thought: if you want there to be content of someone, often you have to create that content yourself. that's how i taught myself to gif years ago, and that's how i ended up creating this blog too! and there's also a reason why other content creators happen to have bigger audiences, which obviously is a combination of a bunch of factors, so i don't think i'm in a place to feel sad about ranboo's success just because my preferred cc didn't get as much attention as him.

like, for instance, i could also complain about how every time 5up invites a well known streamer to a lobby most commentary revolves around that person... but ultimately, i've learned to just be happy that the streamers that i know and love are being watched by a new audience. like, i'm sure that many people who only thought as 5up as the among us guy now know a different side of him and appreciate him more because of it, and that makes me really happy - both because 5up deserves all the love, and because i'm happy more people get to see and enjoy a content creator i really like.

the thing is, the case with smaller content creators (as 5up is in the mcyt landscape) is that fans are torn between two different perspectives: in one side, we want the cc that we like to get more exposure so they can be appreciated by more people and experience more success, but also we don't want them to become more popular because we're not ready to let go from a cozier, smaller fandom and bring in new people that can stir up a lot of shit lol. but being in fandom for a long time, not only you learn to deal with those feelings, but also to understand that roaring success isn't what is destined to your rather small cc and That's Fine: that sometimes people will only pay attention to them when they're interacting with a really large content creator and it's okay, and it doesn't take from the fact that your cc is still greatly appreciated and supported by an important quantity of people.

what i choose to leave with, is that i'm willing to bet a lot of ranboo fans who watched the stream only because he was on it ended up having a kick out of the cupduo interactions. in the end, everything went great for all them: the three of them had fun, tubbo tried something new and did a serious cooking stream for once lol, 5up got to meet one of his beloved friends in the uk and finally did a cooking stream, us fans got a bunch of fun content to gush about... and even if it was the case that either 5up or tubbo got sad/frustrated that people were overfocusing on ranboo, i'm sure they understand how it is and dealt with it accordingly. but from what i saw they all felt pretty satisfied with how things turned out like. so i'm choosing to take those things and deal with my little entitled fan-of-a-small-cc feelings privately, if ever needed.

[snailsnfriends]

Dream SMP and the Effects of Grimdark Media: An Essay

Hello! For those who don’t me, I am snail, and I have been interested in the Dream SMP since October, but joined the Tumblr community not too long ago. As a writer and actor myself, the work of those on the Dream SMP has absolutely blown me away. However, I and others have noticed a trend in the writing of the Dream SMP: a good sum of it is very grimdark, and I began to notice people really feeling the effects of that, and I wanted to look more deeply into it, and how that can be altered. 

NOTE: I am completely aware that all of the writers on the Dream SMP are amateurs, and likely do not have any sort of “training” other than what they were taught in school. I would not be critiquing the writing of the Dream SMP if I did not believe that it could be “fixed.” Later in this essay, I offer suggestions to “fix” the problem that I’m bringing up. All references to factual information used in this essay will be linked at the end. 

Now, before we can talk about the Dream SMP and its writing, first we need to figure out what grimdark media is and how that affects those who watch it.

What is grimdark media?

According to the google the definition of grimdark is “(of fiction, especially fantasy fiction) characterized by disturbing, violent, or bleak subject matter and a dystopian setting.”

So now that we’ve established what grimdark is, how does depressing media, or any form of media for that matter, affect our emotions as the viewer?

As we are consuming any form of media, whether it’s a movie, a TV show, a book, a podcast, a live theatrical performance, or a Dream SMP lore stream, we as the viewers are completely aware that what we are watching is purely fictional, and that those who are performing are acting. None of the events are real, none of the characters are real, and none of the settings are real. 

So why do we react so heavily to certain moments? Why do we cry during heavy lore streams if we know that none of it is real? 

A lot of it has to do with the human capacity to feel empathy/sympathy. Empathy allows us to understand the experiences of others, even complete strangers. Sympathy, on the other hand, allows us to share the feelings and/or emotions of others. As we are consuming media, we are aware that all of it is fake, but we still feel empathy and/or sympathy for the characters. So much so that a physical response, such as crying, is a result. 

Even though the characters of the Dream SMP are not real, a lot of their characters’ responses to traumatic events ARE, so we as an audience sympathize with them heavily. For example, c!Tommy shows very clear signs of PTSD after being killed by Dream, such as extreme emotional distress or physical reactions to something that reminds the victim of the event (c!Tommy freaking out after taking fall damage), trying to avoid discussing the even or avoiding activities, people, and places that remind the victim of the event (c!Tommy refusing to go into depth about what happened to him), memory problems (does not really remember how long he was dead for), easily startled, always on guard, extremely irritable, angry outbursts or aggressive behavior, and difficulty keeping close relationships (his current relationship with c!Tubbo). 

Even though we as an audience know that c!Tommy and his experiences aren’t real, his reactions to these experiences are realistic, and can be relatable to a lot of viewers, those with PTSD and those without (which is why it is VERY important to be careful with your word choice when discussing these characters; this connects with the problem of villainizing characters with mental illnesses, but that’s another topic for another day). We as viewers empathize with c!Tommy because it is likely that we have reacted the same way to traumatic events, and we understand them fully. They may remind us of our past and/or current selves, so we react emotionally to them. 

We as people also mirror the reactions and emotions of others. If someone starts to cry, real or fictional, it’s likely that you will as well. If someone is angry, you will likely get angry as well. This is not odd, and is very normal for humans to do. Regardless, getting angry or crying are emotional responses, and will hurt you in some way. 

Another thing to note is that this fandom is made up of mostly minors, and some of the most traumatized characters on the Dream SMP are also minors. It can be hard to watch kids your own age go through so much, even fictional ones. As an adult, it can be just as hard to watch these young kids go through so much, especially when you try to compare those characters to who you were at their ages. 

Even those who have not gone through these events will likely sympathize with these characters heavily because what they have gone through is emotionally heavy. Because of all of this, watching heavy lore streams can have a negative effect on a viewer’s mental health. 

Okay, so why is the Dream SMP storyline at the moment so dark and angsty? Why do people keep engaging with it if it is negatively affecting their mental health?

This sort of “angst spiral” of sorts is usually something I notice in fanworks such as fanart or fanfiction. It is sometimes a lot more fun to write or draw heavy, emotional moments, and they garner more attention. 

It sort of goes like this: the plot has a normal amount of angst in it for the story, and at this point it is balanced with more happy or “fluffy” content, the angst gets more attention from fans, the writer (or in the case of the Dream SMP, writers) notice this and write more angst as a response but it is still bearable, the audience feeds off of this heavily and create more fanart/fanfiction/theories based on it, writer really notices this and (understandably) comes to the conclusion that angst/grimdark things are the best/easiest way to get the audience excited for the plot, the plot gets very very grimdark and is not balanced out with any upbeat moments, random angst plots are started with no real ending in sight despite that not being the original plan for the character/plot (feet are too small for the big shoes) and the rare upbeat moments are short/not given any attention, and at this point, it can be almost unbearable to watch because the plot has become too grimdark. Once we reach this point, or even a few before it, it can cause a big toll on the viewers’ mental health.

The reason why someone who has been negatively affected by the grimdark content of the Dream SMP may still watch it is because the Dream SMP has not always been this way, and the writers have proven that they can do upbeat/fluffy content, so they keep watching. A big example of this is the Disc War Finale. Although the first half of it was more angsty, the final parts where everyone came together to put c!Dream in jail and to protect c!Tommy and c!Tubbo was upbeat and even a bit cathartic to watch. C!Tommy and c!Tubbo sitting on the bench, listening to their discs together in the end was much needed for the audience. This can even be seen in smaller examples, like c!Tommy exclaiming, “I’m free!” while flying around with c!Dream’s trident, or c!Tubbo and c!Ranboo adopting Michael and getting married.

The Dream SMP also may be someone’s hyperfixation, so they are unable to simply stop watching. 

So now that we know all of this, what can the writers of the Dream SMP do to fix this, and what can we as viewers do to help ourselves out?

As I said in the note before this essay, I will be citing examples of a more balanced lore/angst plot that the writers have shown that they are capable of doing.

The writers: 

Make designated lore streams shorter

The best example of this is c!Tommy’s 25-30 minute prison streams. These streams were short, sweet, and to the point. We got all of the “lore” we needed quickly, and if you happened to miss it, it was easy to watch it back later. If the lore bits were too heavy to watch, then you would not be missing too much. 

I know that this is definitely not always possible, so this is most likely the best way to go:

Balance out lore and funny bits in streams

Cc!Tommy’s last lore stream, pretty much all of the Pogtopia streams, and most of cc!Tubbo’s streams are like this. They are a mix of lore and funny moments where the CCs are actually speaking and joking with each other. These are a lot easier to watch because it is not heavy the entire time. The joking moments provide a break in between the angst, and it can also be used as a good way to remind the audience that the Dream SMP is purely fictional. These streams are also better for those who do not really care for the lore and would rather just watch the CCs mess around with each other. 

For me, these funny moments are what caused me to fall in love with the Dream SMP and the creators behind it, and I know that the same applies to a lot of people in this fandom. I think this would probably be the best way for the Dream SMP to operate around lore. 

The viewers 

Try to take a break from lore streams if it becomes too much

As I stated before, the Dream SMP is not real, but the characters’ reactions to events can be very realistic and hard to watch. If things become too much for you, try to take a break from it. Stop watching the stream, don’t go on social media if you follow stan accounts or Dream SMP dedicated blogs, and go do something that calms you down. If you feel that you’re feeling good enough to go back to the stream, go ahead! If not, then that’s completely okay too!

Follow lore recap accounts/blogs to stay up to date on the lore

The fear of missing lore streams is centered largely around missing something crucial. There are plenty of accounts on Twitter and blogs on Tumblr that recap lore streams so you can stay up to date on the plot without having to watch the streams. 

The VODs will be there to watch later

If things are too much, remember that you do not have to watch the streams in real-time. You can always watch them later if you aren’t in the right headspace to watch them live. 

Conclusion

The Dream SMP’s writing and acting is very impressive. The amount of awesome fanart, fanfiction, analysis posts, and other work is absolutely amazing. It is so cool that so many people enjoy this Minecraft roleplay so much. The amount of people who love it is good proof that the writers are doing an amazing job, and the amount of people having an emotional response to it shows the same thing. However, the amount of angst can be hard to watch and can put the writers in a tough spot to get out of. 

I have a lot of faith in the writers of the Dream SMP, and I believe that it is possibly on the right track, with Tommy’s latest lore stream being an example of this. I really do think that the amount of grimdark content can be altered and streams can be easier and more fun to watch. Hopefully we’ll get a more mixed bag of lore and angst soon to make things more enjoyable for everyone involved.

Sources:

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/post-traumatic-stress-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20355967

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-moral-molecule/200902/why-we-cry-movies

https://www.vice.com/sv/article/exqgqm/why-do-we-cry-when-we-watch-films

https://www.merriam-webster.com/words-at-play/sympathy-empathy-difference

[shoezuki]

cracks knuckles. i promised to elaborate and i will.

the one common perspective that everyone seems to be able to agree on is that techno / sbi + schlatt + tubbo + ranboo are just genuinely funnier than the dteam, and honestly yes it's because if the popularity. if you go back and watch the dteams older (im talking before 2-3mil subs) videos they are funnier than their current ones and i think it's because they're trying to shift their humor to a broader audience?

the minecraft community has always been mainly queer/poc/ndv kids because it was exiled away from "acceptable society" for so long that only the people who had already been "exiled" continued to enjoy it. I, as an example, stopped playing when it became a cringy thing because I was so worried about being seen as weird. now that ive discovered, come to terms with, and enjoy my queerness, i realize that if i had known i was queer back when mc was exiled i wouldve continued to play because i alrwady would have known what it was like to be part of that seperate society. (Please keep reading i promise I have a point)

but then minecraft came back. minecraft became mainstream again, and it came back HARD. watching it go from something that you would be bullied immensely for to something that you would be bullied for not doing was an extreme experience. in all honesty im still angry about it, but that's another topic. when minecraft became mainstream it brought with it all of the people that hadn't been part of the exiled societies yk? including... the dream team.

dream blew up. we all know how much he blew up. i personally dont believe he cheated on the speedrun but to each their own (although after reading your stuff and becoming more critical of them im realizing i might need to reexamine that), and the speedrun controversy brought even more people to his base (cough drama loving straight white girls cough).

when they were brought into the fanbase that's when it started to go downhill. they shifted their humor to fit that, or maybe their humor was always that and they just got more confident in showing it after they had gotten a fan base to back them up. which is also why techno / sbi + schlatt + tubbo + ranboo (who ill refer to just as techno&co now because he's the main one but also that's long as hell lmao) are funnier than them!

for one, their fanbases are smaller. now 5 mil is by no means a small number, but compared to dream's 16 mil? yknow. especially with techno's wack upload schedule he's never had to worry about having a stan fan base because the only people who stay are people who genuinely enjoy his content the way it is.

two, techno&co are mostly ndv. techno has adhd, tubbo has dyslexia, wilbur had and maybe still has depression, ranboo has anxiety, tommy hasnt confirmed or denied his adhd but im betting he at least has borderline. i am in no ways saying that being part of one minority (in this case ndv) gives you free range over another (queer), but all minorities have this understanding about what it is to be part of an exiled community (if that makes sense).

philza and schlatt, not so sure if they're ndv, but they're also older and generally more mature and esp in philza's case, theyve had their chance to make their bad jokes and pull stupid shit and theyve grown out of it (if they ever had that phase at all). techno&co have that understanding and even if they dont know where the boundaries are they know that queer humor (and all humor! other than techno, sbi doesnt really make gay jokes) going to have boundaries, and they respect that.

three, techno is the funniest bitch because he has adhd. i dont take criticism on this point because im right.

i probably missed a lot, probably got some stuff wrong, but all in all i think i hit my mark. i can come off anon to chat anytime if youd vibe w that. no pressure to respond to this! have a good day, etc etc, it was fun getting to tear into the dteam in a safe space. respect for them and their fanbases, their humor is a little off but i still gotta respect how well theyve done. btw i woke up and rolled over and started typing I haven't proofed this at all so yeah. :) - andy

And your brain is fucking massive yo like u must got chronic back pain too from holdin up all these Thoughts in ur head

I really like. Minecraft fans is So varied cuz like u said it was so very 'cringe' before. I got into mc again n playin it w my siblings years before it Popped Off again entirely cuz i stopped Giving a Shit that it was 'weird' or any a that. N sbi have been goin strong through it So Long both when it was hotshit and when it was "cringe"

N definitely like minecraft ive always noticed has a Massive ndv community. I dont know entirely what it is like definitely part of the 'cringe' factor like u said and also cubes make our brains go brrrr? The aspect of self expression in it? I dont know but we Been Here

I do think dteam's content and shit like. It obviously moved in sync with perceptions of mc to garner a Big General audience. Dream blowing up entirely had to do w the Trends and how mc got popular. Therefore hes audience is Huge and Varied

In contrast w techno n like. He has blown up quite a bit too. But i feel its fair to say he Hasnt altered his content significantly. Or at least like. How its presented, what he does, etc. For fucks sake he doesnt have a stream schedule. And although his content is Still garnering a Large and really varied audience it feels more like. Isolated and homogeneous almost

Like. I can go into the technocord right now and say 'dont forget to take your meds' and at least 20 or so ppl would be all like Oh Fuck Whoops. Theres SO many of us adhd ppl in there. I always goof bout techno jus sayin pspspsps and the neurodivergents crawling up from the floorboards but honest to god. His content and jokes and i suppose Personality jus appeals to us So Much. Same goes for sbi pretty heavily honestly altho i feel its most evident in techno's most Dedicated fans

Also. Lbr. The people who stay through technos schedules and content Droughts are the ones who be hyperfixating Abskfvdkdsjsjsl

BUT going into sbi as a Group like. They are friends. And together they are fucking hilarious. N i feel it strongly like. The fact theyre all such Varied people of different ages and such helps w that shit. It Works So Well.

Long story short being neurodivergent makes you funny as hell letsgo

[sadlisogie]

TUBBO APPRECIATION DAY POGGGG!!! can't believe my streamer has been on twitch for 3 years peepoClap

first of all I wanna say that tubbo is a really big inspiration to me. the way he pursues the things he's passionate and ambitious about to the BEST of his abilities (from his server which I know will be amazing to his song which we WILL be streaming) is so cool. it's so inspiring as another young neurodivergent person to see someone like me succeed !!

he's so much more intelligent than I feel like a lot of ppl give him credit for!! he knows so many interesting facts and is so knowledgeable about minecraft and math and other stuff I have 0 clue about lol. u can tell when he speaks about deeper topics he's informed and I love hearing his thoughts on things like reincarnation and life in general!!!

the way he's always open to new ideas and views on life >>>. when he's uneducated about something he's always willing to ask questions and genuinely wants to learn, and makes any changes he needs to and its super admirable, especially in the gaming community. just yesterday he had a really great conversation on his alt about neopronouns and once he learned more about them he thought they were super cool!!!

speaking of which, his consistent support for the lgbtq+ community. he never hesitates to give a "welcome to the boys" or defend anyone due to their sexual orientation in his own way. idk why some ppl have been saying lgbtq+ is too "confusing" for him, but he himself literally said its basic human rights and he goes out of his way to make sure his chat feels welcome and doesn't single them out/treat them differently or more "special".

people truly don't give him enough credit for how amazingly kind and humble he is. every streamer and person he's come into contact with loves him. he tries to raid smaller streamers (a lot of whom are lgbtq+ and/or women which is very important!!!) and always supports the artists we have in the community. he rarely ever asks for subs and has super interesting irl streams and ideas so different from regular "minecrafters" for sub goals and STILL DOES THEM everytime even if he doesn't hit it, bc he cares more about making good content for us, his community. he's got a wicked sense of humour, he's musically talented, he is able to keep an audience engaged for really long periods of time just chilling on minecraft which shows how wonderful of a streamer he is even tho he doesn't get enough credit.

he always says he doesn't deserve us or anything he's gotten but he ABSOLUTELY does and I wish he would stop talking poorly about himself and the community would stop underestimating and babying him, and instead treat him like the amazing individual content creator he is!!

[spoopy-moose]

Here i am asking you for your postmodern interpretation of the dsmp, would you share with the rest of the class please?

Absolutely. Sorry for the essay ahead.

Bear in mind that I am in no way a literature student, I am literally a high school student who’s way too into this sort of stuff, like way more than I should be.

Postmodernist philosophy is basically a rejection of grand narratives, such as the narratives of ideology and such, so in postmodern literature, what most of them aim to explore is the connection of the text to the audience and the blurring of realities. It is most often characterised by non-linera narratives, metafiction, pastiche and irony, and temporal displacement. 

In it’s whole, the Dream SMP is almost an entirely new way to tell a story. Because of the unconventional format, this sort of structure reflects the metaness of the story as a whole. Characters slip in and out of characters all the time, making the line between what is fictional and what is “real” blurry. Take Tommy’s streams for example, in his streams, what are joking bits and what are actual serious bits are distorted all the time, so much so that the “real” Tommy and the “character” Tommy blend together into one. This could be said of many other characters in the story of the SMP, where they slip in and out of character to such an extent that it almost becomes unrecgonisable. This is connected to the aespects of postmodern fiction of reader involvement and metafiction, which highlights a key aespect of this sort of fiction as being able to shift from different levels of being or different “worlds”. In this case, the world of the SMP and our own real world. 

Another way is through the intertexual nature of the story itself. To interpret the story, one must have a baseline knowledge of other works that the content creators are in, some with little to no relations to the story. If we were to view the story in its whole, the audience cannot just rely on just the story of the SMP itself, the audience have to sought out connections to other pieces of media in order to create a deeper understanding of the source text. An example of this would be the relationship of SBI, especially that of Philza towards the rest. Philza did not become a character at all until Nov 16 and if one did not have any piror knowledge of the nature of his character’s relationship with the character of Wilbur, then Wilbur’s death scene would have been a lot less impactful than it was. Another would be Schlatt and Wilbur’s relationship before the SMP, if someone went into the SMP with no idea about Schlatt and his connection to Wilbur as a character, then they might not understand the full emotional impact of the second arc.

There are some smaller things as well which connects it to the genre of postmodernism. Like the useage of magic realism, where the inherent mythticism of the game is overlooked in favour of more “real” events. The blend of “high” and “low” fiction, wherein the epic story of a nation’s rise and fall exists within the context of drug brewing and dirty jokes. Temporal displacement comes in the form of us never actually knowing how old each of the character’s are, where lore around their ages and time and familial relationships constantly shift around. Parody in the ridiculousness of the whole plot, how generally over the top the plot is despite in its whole being a minecraft roleplay server. Pastiche in the mirroring of the eariler plot to that of Hamilton and the later plot to that from JD in Heathers. 

However, I think that the overall philosphy and the circular nature of the plot has postmodern characterstics as well. The ideology that L’manberg was founded on, an ideology of freedom and sanctuary, didn’t exist as there wasn’t a tryant, only someone who tried to stop a drug trafficking ring. The ideology fought by those who consider themselves for the ideology of L’manberg too, then doesn’t exist and were founded on unfound grounds. And those who try to rebuild L’manberg were then, building it on empty grounds. I think a big idea presented here is that L’manberg never existed and those who are still fighting for it, whether it be Tubbo or Tommy or any of the characters, are then stuck in an romanticised version of their past. This then in turn has caused grief amongst the characters again and again, as they scramble to achieve something that was in a way unachieveable. That, I would say, adheres to the postmodern principles of a rejection of ideology and a rejection of reality pretty well. 

But that’s just my interpretation of the plot, especially the last bit is literally purely my interpretation. And also, I’m not like fully educated on this subject, I’ve literally only been reading massive amounts of internet articles on this because I found this ideology a few days ago and now I’m actually obssessed.

Look all I’m saying is that if you put every last bit of the dream smp into a novel, not just like the main story arc, you’d get something at the general fuckery level of gravity’s rainbow

[mihidecet]

Sbi&CO d&d AU: Don’t Keep me Waiting (2/?)

I’m back! Chapter two is finally here and, as promised, it’s a bit of a beefy one!! I do hope you’ll like it!

A special shoutout to Cassie and my sister, for basically creating the newly added character, and that anon who totally didn’t guess who was coming a week before I posted the chapter xD

The noise inside the tavern hits them like a tidal wave the instant they open the heavy looking oak doors: a cacophony of people talking, friends cheering, music playing and orders being shouted from one side of the room to the other. 

On one hand, it makes Wilbur flinch and recoil, his ears ringing with the sudden switch from being in the quietness of a mostly desert street to this; the good thing is nobody really pays any particular attention to their group entering. They do of course gather some looks and stares - they're a big group after all, most people here are either in small, four-people groups or even smaller. 

But Techno's trademark pink hair is safely hidden under a hood, in order to allow him to walk around without getting constant stares - respectful, fearful or otherwise. They're here to have fun, not pick fights; at least that is what they had decided on before signing up for the tournament. Except for Tommy: to quote the little demon, they were there to win.

Nevertheless. 

Wilbur is there, at that moment, in that tavern, to play and to share his music with a willing audience. So, while most of the others hurry to grab a big enough table and some extra chairs, Wilbur makes his way towards the innkeeper's desk, tail swinging back and forth, mind already running with ideas on what to play for this specific audience - adventurers are a picky sort, they either like your song or they boo you out of the tavern, and he wants to give a good impression especially with the tournament coming up-

The innkeeper sees him and Phil approaching, his eyes darting to his brand new splendidly hand carved guitar - he will never ever ever be able to repay Tubbo - before he lets out a tired sigh. Which comes crashing down onto Wil's mood like an avalanche, covering instantly all his bright ideas and expectations. 

It's Phil's hand on the small of his back that brings him back into focus, prompting him to regain the sway in his step - no time to mope, they're here for at least another month.

"I don't suppose you have a spot open for tonight?" He asks, putting on his best vendor voice, and he can see the tiredness in the eyes of the person in front of him. 

"I do not. You can have half an hour in two days. Name?" The person asks, voice flat with the face of somebody who's had to repeat this process so many times just tonight. So Wilbur swallows down his protest - half an hour in two days is a horrible deal - and nods amicably. 

"Wilbur, Wilbur Soot." The innkeeper looks to be thinking intensely for a moment - a spark of hope shines in his chest as he hopes for a moment that his name will be recognised, since he's spent the past years building up his fame by working tirelessly -, then they shake their head and write down something that vaguely resembles his name next to some numbers. Wilbur smothers the irrational, embarrassing disappointment that threatens to rise in his throat.

"You have my thanks, good sir!" He adds enthusiastically, voice pitched a bit too higher than normal, because a part of him feels for the poor soul who has to deal with people of all sorts, and swivels on his feet.

Phil's hand on his shoulder brings him out of his own mind as he's definitely not storming away from the poor innkeeper's table. He doesn't even need to say anything: Wil deflates instantly, tense shoulders sagging instantly and a long sigh leaving him as he leans into the elf. 

"I really wanted to play." Wilbur grumbles as Phil's hand moves from one shoulder to the other, effectively bringing him into a half-hug and ruffling his hair with a chuckle. 

"I know, and you're going to." The elf replies, tone calm and reassuring, and Wil can't help but ache a little, feeling like a kid all over again and not liking it even a little bit. Once, he would have stayed quiet and stewed into his own brooding mood, but he knows now that he can rely on the others for situations like these. So he ignores how awkward he feels at protesting for something as silly as this, and lets himself pout. 

"Half an hour is so little, though. And since we're not taking any jobs for a while it could help with paying for the tavern." Phil quietly hums in response and experience tells him that he's pondering over a good answer. Wil's eyes scan the tavern - bigger than he first realised - looking for Tubbo's bee, as he figures it's going to be the easiest thing to recognise in the literal sea of adventures of all kinds.

"You know we don't need it. And I'm sure once they hear how good you are, they'll be asking you to play every night." Phil comments, starting to guide him towards what he thinks is the right direction, but Wil is a bit more preoccupied with preening, slightly flustered, due to the compliment. One would expect him to be used to them, but the thing with his friends is that praises from them always feel a little more true, a little more honest, and they always hit him in the best way possible. 

When they join the rest of the team - clustered around a single medium sized table - Wil's mood has significantly improved. 

There's food already waiting for him and as soon as he sits down a fox jumps in his lap and curls up, snout raised towards him to slowly blink at him before he buries his head in his tail. 

Wilbur starts digging into his meal with gusto, lightly scratching behind Fundy's ear as the shifter decides to take a nap.

The tavern is, overall, a nice place. It's cool to see so many adventurers gathered together, and hearthwarming to be able to see many new friendships blossoming. 

After the team announcements that same morning, there are some people that have found themselves needing to look for strangers basing themselves only on names - or worse, nicknames. 

Wilbur figures that the people that are in the best position to find their teammates are those who have been paired with bards, as there have been half a dozen different people performing ever since they sat down to eat. 

Luckily for him, his own team has no such problems. Tubbo, Niki and Fundy, on the other hand, are still waiting to learn who their fourth is going to be. Since the training grounds will soon be open for team practices, starting from the next morning in fact, they plan on looking for them there. 

Tymora, or Lady Luck, has apparently other plans for them.

It's nearing midnight when a short man with only one eye and a thick Draconic accent walks up the stage for what seems like the hundredth time that night. In his hand, the same piece of paper that has been progressively getting more and more ragged as the evening went on. He unfolds it as he walks up, thanking the tired looking bard that is leaving the stage, and it rips in half - his only reaction is a sigh and a shrug.

He squints, putting together the parchment and pursing his lips as the two ripped halves slowly mold back together, then calls out, somehow magically raising his voice over the sound of the tavern's clients talking and clapping for the leaving bard.

"Next up: Quackity! Come up the stage!"

Fundy's fox claws suddenly dig into Wilbur's legs, making him wince in pain and choke on his sip of mead. A split second later, he's got a lap full of disgruntled mage. 

Tubbo, on the other side of the table, is standing on his chair in order to see the stage over a firbolg's shoulders - holding himself up by using Tommy's head, who is extremely unwilling. 

"A bard?!" Fundy exclaims, prompting Wilbur to move his eyes from the stage towards him with a frown.

"What's wrong with bards?!" He asks, helping him get off of him and into his abandoned chair. Before Fundy can find a way to put his rebuttal into coherent words, Wilbur's eyes snap back toward the stage as people are starting to give a quiet, tentative clap for the newcomer.

The kid looks human, probably about Niki's age, and he sits down a bit awkwardly on the stool he brought with himself before plucking a couple of strings on his guitar. They're sitting quite far from the stage, but Wilbur's trained eye still manages to catch the fact that that is an old and well used one - his heart squeezes just a bit at the thought of his former source pride and joy, the guitar he travelled with ever since he left home.

Wilbur knows, viscerally, of the fear that always precedes a performance, especially in front of a new crowd. Especially in front of adventures, whose tastes are ever changing and easy to sway from the crowd's perspective: adventurers either like you, or they don't, and if they don't you're not gonna have a good time.

And yet. 

After checking his guitar, the kid looks up with a bright smile and a confident expression and starts playing - no buildup, no further introduction, no boisterous announcements of his titles or fame. 

And by the gods does he play. 

He's good, but he's not just technically good: he's an entertainer, plays with his guitar as much as he plays with words and with the crowd - clearly making up verses for his songs to fit what happens around him, bantering with the adventurers that step up to his plays of words. Sometimes he bursts out laughing mid verse and despite that his fingers never stop flying over the cords, his laughter becoming part of the song itself. 

Halfway through, he catches Techno's eyes: the shifter raises an eyebrow and Wil simply nods, so Techno nods back

The tiefling is glad to know that they both think he's good, they had been worried about leaving the three newest additions to their team alone with a random stranger. 

And if the enthusiastic way the rest of the team is clapping for him, they're going to get along more than well.

Half an hour later a flushed and visibility sweaty Quackity makes his way down the stage, followed by a thunderous applause and some occasional claps on the back; one passing adventurer even thrusts a pint of ale into his hands, prompting what looks to be a flustered reaction from the bard as he quickly makes his way out of the tavern. 

Either that or he needed some air, which was completely understandable, especially after such an active performance. 

Wilbur is about to comment on the stellar introduction they just received when the sudden noise of hands slamming onto the table - their table - makes him jump in his skin.

"We have to go and say hi!" Declares Tubbo, still standing on the chair - now with Niki helping him not fall to the ground. 

Tommy nods enthusiastically next to him and even Fundy seems to be about to agree. To be quite honest, Wilbur wants to join in too and is therefore about to stand up when Phil raises his hands to get them to slow down. 

"You're gonna scare him if you all corner him outside. How about his three teammates go, on their best behaviour?" The elf concludes, shooting Fundy a pointed look. 

The shifter gapes, looking extremely insulted, then he starts to protest and finally he sighs with a pout. Ah, the wonders of people arguing with Phil. 

"Alright, no pranks and no scamming. Pinky promise." Fundy huffs out, crossing his arms over his chest and slouching down into his chair. Wilbur does his best to chuckle under his breath, because he's not any better, he's just not the target of the reprimand for this time. 

Then, Phil's stare turns to his left. 

"You too, Tubbo. No scams." He states, prompting Tubbo to almost fall over as he agitatedly protests, spluttering out indignantly.

Exiting into the coldness of the night is almost a shock, especially when compared to the almost too warm air inside the tavern.

The sounds coming from inside are almost completely silenced, and when they close the doors behind them the stillness of the night is all they can hear. Fundy shudders for a moment, his body struggling to adapt to the lack of heat, when his instinctive reaction would normally be to morph back into his fox form. He snaps his fingers together, conjuring a small flame in his hands to keep himself warm, and sees Tubbo moving closer to him before he remembers that ah, right, the kid can't see in the dark. 

Still, it's not hard to find their objective - their future friend, as he's already been dubbed by Tubbo. Quackity is leaning on the outside wall, right next to an illuminated window, pint abandoned on his side as he looks at the night sky, one foot tapping on the ground as if following a silent melody. 

In the beginning, the plan had involved Niki leading the way, so that she could introduce the three of them and they could all make arrangements to meet the next morning at the training fields, so that they could all be friends and hang out and win the tournament. 

Said plan is instantly scrapped the instant Tubbo lets out a small gasp, eyes going wide as he hurries to duck around Niki, swiftly avoiding Fundy’s hand reaching out to grab at his shirt. The young human scrambles to reach the sitting bard, who naturally flinches and stares in confusion at the kid running towards him. 

As Tubbo finally gets close, he stops and points at Quackity’s head.

"Hi! You have a moth on your head." 

Fundy’s groan is so loud, it reaches the two of them even though he is currently a couple of steps behind and hiding his face in his hands. Niki’s high pitched giggles follow suit, and are soon joined by a shocked burst of laughter - loud, bright, just like his music - from the human sitting in front of Tubbo. 

"I- Hi! I do?" Quackity asks, voice tilting upwards as he looks up, as if he could be able to see his own head by rolling his eyes into his skull. 

Tubbo giggles seeing him go cross-eyed, and reaches up to gently take the moth in his hand. The little bug’s wings flutter a little as he is moved, apparently not glad to be disturbed from his perch, but he seems to begrudgingly accept his new spot since Tubbo holds him close to the light coming from the tavern’s window. His wings are very pretty, a light grey with black streaks into them that look like the splatters of ink that cover the pages of Tubbo’s various notebooks - his ever growing collection of plans and schematics for new and old projects. According to Tubbo's admittedly limited experience with moths, this one is smaller than one would expect. Very tiny and friendly - "just like you!" Wilbur would probably say if he were there. 

"Aw, look at him! Isn't he cute?" Tubbo coos at his new friend, prompting a slightly awkward chuckle from Quackity as the man moves just slightly away from the insect.

"I'm not a fan of bugs, but, uh- he does look fancy." Q eyes nervously the other two, but Tubbo ignores it, too taken with his new little pal to take care of trivial things like introductions. Niki just smiles warmly and opens her mouth to do so - possibly to also reassure the poor human - , but Tubbo is already speaking again.

"My friend can speak to bugs! He said moths always think of food and light." Quackity is once again seemingly stunned, stuck between the awkwardness of not knowing who the people surrounding him are and the confusion regarding the topic of discussion. He blinks, shooting a look towards the bug in Tubbo's hand before quickly looking away with a light grimace, choosing to focus on Tubbo himself.

"Well, little buddy better not get hurt trying to reach a flame!" Q jokes, letting out a small chuckle. Tubbo's face turns from awed to serious in a split second, his other hand moving to cup around the moth.

"That won't happen, I'll protect him!" He answers determinately, nodding solemnly towards Quackity, who can only gape for a moment before bursting out laughing again, shaking his head a little. 

"So, uh … Is there a reason why you've cornered me, or are you just fans?" He asks after a moment, once his chuckles have died down, turning a raised eyebrow towards Fundy and Niki, still standing a bit awkwardly behind Tubbo. 

"Oh, we are your teammates! We recognised your name and figured we should say hi." Niki explains with a smile, moving to crouch next to Tubbo so that the young human can move the moth closer to her.

"You- oh! Oh! -" Quackity exclaims, eyes widening and suddenly looking at them with less confusion "-That's good to know, what a coincidence!" He comments, chuckling to himself as he wipes a hand over his face, grimacing at the dampness that comes away with it - he really needs to wash up.

"And yet! The gods smile upon us." Niki says with a smile, watching as the moth flutters his wings to move from Tubbo's hand to hers.

Nobody seems to notice the unimpressed look that Quackity shoots towards the night sky, but Tubbo's eyes snap towards him the instant he lets out a deep sigh.

"I guess so. Anyhow. I'm going to pass out on my bed, I'll see you tomorrow morning?" The human asks, tone a sweet mixture of enthusiastic, hopeful and exhausted as he moves away from the wall - his guitar in one hand and the untouched mug of ale in the other. 

Tubbo nods enthusiastically, grinning widely at him; next to him, Niki smiles kindly, while Fundy goes for a much more noncommittal nod of his head.

Quackity's eyes linger on the three of them for just a moment more, as if trying to figure something out, then he nods to himself and raises the mug to mimic a toast in their honour, opening the door to the inside of the tavern.

"Don't keep me waiting!"

[nostalgic-pancakes]

Watching the starlings as autumn draws in

Summary: Tommy and his friends try on some skirts, and he reflects a bit on how they all got here. (It's a happy story) Title from September by Sparky Deathcap

Pairings: None! Platonic everyone (esp in irl fics_)

Read on AO3 (preferred place to read)

Word count: 2570

Warnings: None, except for surface-level references to the exile/prison arcs, but not much.

Other notes: I wrote this in a fit of madness last night in like three hours at 2 am, so i’ll probably edit it honestly but for now, enjoy! (If the CC’s ever display discomfort with this type of fic I will take it down)

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"WELCOME BACK TO THE STREAM, BOYS!" Tommy exclaims, rubbing his hands together as he starts rapid-fire answering questions about the stream, and the stream title from chat. It's funny, how over time, Tommy's come to see Chat as this one entity- an old friend. The nervousness of answering questions as a fifteen year old with nothing but a big personality, a twitch account and a copy of Minecraft is all but gone now, nineteen years old and happier than he's ever been.

Dreadfulzombie19: what are u doin this stream

"THANK YOU FOR ASKING, Dreadfulzombie19, today is gonna be a bit different, innit Tubbo?" Tommy raises his voice a bit at the end of his sentence, just loud enough for one of his flatmates to hear him. When Tubbo yells back an affirmative, Tommy turns back to his setup. Chat's gone a bit wild again, even though he, Tubbo and Ranboo have been living together for over a year now.

"Okay, okay, calm down chat- so recently I was at university, as usual right? And I had an eight AM class again, and… yeah I can see you all can relate."

"BUT! BUT! On my way back to the flat, I saw something really cool." Tommy hesitates in his speech to take a sip of coke again- his blood pressure's been acting up lately and watches Chat to wild again, asking him what he saw.

"Okay, so there was a shop- new place, which doesn't happen often this is fucking Brighton- and they sold skirts and dresses and stuff with adjustments for AMAB sizes!" Chat goes a bit bonkers, but Tommy's mod team- a little smaller than it used to be, now that he isn't the centre of YouTube or Twitch attention anymore, none of them are- are handling it, and pretty well.

"So I had to go, right? As many of you probably know, last year, I made the astounding discovery that gender-based stereotypes and expectations are, in fact, fake and I should not give a SHIT. And so I go in and look through the stuff- it's a really poggers shop by the way, and I find the perfect thing- it was the most poggers skirts and shit, okay? So, today's stream is going to have me wearing this pogchamp shit and wearing it right, with the help of…" Tommy ends his monologue by picking up the joke shaker-things that Phil had gotten him as a housewarming gift last year and indicates for his first two helpers to enter the office.

In walks his mother, face obscured from view as always, waving to the camera, and Wilbur, also wearing one of his only skirts for this occasion. Eret had taught him, on a phonecall in the skirt shop that week about the different types of skirts with a handy diagram. Wilbur's was a pleated circle skirt, brown to offset the bright yellow of his sweater and beanie, the same colour as his hair. It's very swoosh-y, so he's wearing black leggings with his regular shoes too. Motherinnit's also wearing her favourite skirt, a baby blue prairie skirt, Tommy thinks, and it's one he's seen fairly often.

Wilbur ducks down in order to show his face to Chat, and ruffles Tommy's hair while he's at it. Tommy's taller, but not by much, so Wilbur still fucking makes short jokes, That fucker.

Chat is now going so fast that he simply cannot read anything but some of the all caps messages and can barely make out some of the emotes.

"Okay, OKAY, CALM DOWN CHAT! WE HAVE TO GET TO FUCKING BUSINESS!" Tommy yells into the mix, like he did when he was sixteen and used the 'many people find me annoying at first' intro. Nowadays he just lets the content speak for itself. Anyone who wants to be here already is, by now.

Wilbur laughs a bit, and that hasn't changed at all. "Tommy, how is chat supposed to calm down if you're not calm?"

"I am their god!! They will obey via sheer digital willpower!" Tommy replies back, pretty zealously (What? An English Literature class is mandatory for his film degree, and The Great Gatsby by Zelda Fitzgerald is a good book, as are most of the other assigned ones. He's had entire conversations with Techno with just lit quotes and it drives everyone insane. Tommy loves it.) Chat seemingly has listened to his godlike abilities, with a few OG's spotting his half-quotation of one of Dream's last lines in the Dream SMP. The rest are spamming 'MOTHERINNIT'.

"If having a shitty magic trick book from a washed-up politician makes you a god, then what does that make me?" Wilbur replies, with one of Foolish's lines and swatting his hand at Tommy. Tommy swats back.

"Bitch" "Arsehole" "Shithead" "Fuckface" Wilbur finishes cheerily, as if this happens all the time. It does. Chat's used their antics now, four years of consistently making content together will do that for you.

Eventually Motherinnit reminds them both to get back on Topic, and Tommy goes back to facing the camera, addressing Chat directly.

"Today, my beloved mother, and my idiot brother-" "hey!" "And maybe my flatmates will be joining me to show off some cool as SHIT skirts! And a dress or two. We all have our selections, right?" Everyone nods in affirmative, even Tubbo and Ranboo. Though the camera can't see them. Ranboo's just come home from his final class, then. He should probably take the first hour back off, and judging by how Tubbo is forcefully judging Ranboo to the shower, he probably gets it. Tommy signs an affirmative to both of them, and gets back to the camera, where Wilbur's showing off all of his (very poggers) very stupid brown or yellow skirts. Tommy's are in cool colours, for fuck's sake.

"Oh yeah, Puffy just confirmed she'll be on stream! She'll be here in about twenty minutes, accounting for fucking traffic, and Niki' going to get onto VC after her own stream, what game is it this time?"

"GRIS." Wilbur answers.

"Poggers- she is the SHIT and will join us soon! So expect some QUALITY QUALITY content this stream!! Remember to not spam her chat to finish faster." Exclaims Tommy, even if it ends up as a light warning, as he picks up his own very poggers skirts from the extra armchair in his office to show the camera.

One is the classic red and white, mostly white but with bright red on the waist (elastic) and the bottom, and it reached to about Tommy's knee, if worn at the hip. It had no pleats, but the red bits were a very nice velvet texture, and while the skirt was heavy, it still had very much swoosh value, and pockets!! Big ones!! He slips the skirt on top of his jeans before entering camera view, the skirt visible in all its classic Tommyinnit glory, as he takes his place right next to Wilbur, who just took. a quick spin at the behest of several dono's., Skirt spying out from his lower shins all the way to his knee, making visible one of his (many) petticoats. ("What? It's cold all the fucking time here, Toms.") Tommy also makes a quick little spin, skirt flying outward, not upward, so it looks like he's hula hooping for a moment there. Lastly, Motherinnit spins around too, and while her skirts do not swoosh, she looks opulent, like she was about to go to waltz with the enemy, for whom she has a dagger in the back of her dress for. (He finished Anna Karenina and the Six of Crows duology within the same week and has not yet recovered. Jack Edwards is laughing at him as he thinks in his English Lit Graduate glory.)

It's fun, trying on different skirts- he and Wilbur accidentally bought the same dress at one point, which they paired up to wear, darting off into their respective changing rooms while giggling like idiots with their checkered blouses and the grindl skirts that Niki had sent over when she heard of this stream idea, laughing the whole time. Tubbo enters as dramatically as possible with Puffy, and while Tubbo looks really fucking good in his handkerchief skirt with embroidered bees and plain white shirt, it's Puffy who steals the show with an exact, real life version of her red banquet dress.

Fans from way back in the SMP, before Tommy had started branching out start going insane and are bringing back emotes Tommy wasn't sure were still available, but she is fucking stunning- deep shades of red and crimson, with slits on either side of her waist and all the detailing. She'd gotten the contact for her dressmaker through Bernadette Banner, Tommy recalls- she was so fucking cool when she streamed with him once, and gotten him to swear less and supplant those world's with bigger ones to intimidate instead. While he still curses like a sailor as part of his persona, it's less so and he does way less in real life these days, unless the situation calls for it. It's also just rude, especially in uni libraries, where he spends too much time these days wondering why he didn't read more as a kid.

Puffy's stolen his audience for a WHILE, and Niki coming on hasn't helped any, so Tommy exits camera view for a while to hug Ranboo really quickly- he's had midterms and has basically been dying all month.

Everyone on this stream- Tommy, Wilbur, Motherinnit, Tubbo, Puffy, Niki and Ranboo enter the camera frame after entering their dressing rooms for the last time on this particular stream, Puffy with full in-character wigs and makeup, Tommy in an Edwardian-Gothic reminiscent black and red dress, Ranboo in something he bought when he gap-yeared in Japan, punk lolita or something, Niki flaunting her pink in a Marie Antoinette style show of finery, Tubbo dressing in all green this time, something like a very deranged biology teacher who hasn't slept in days (Tubbo hasn't-Tommy has to get into that), Wilbur like a forest-nymph, all earthy tones and swishy fabrics and nature highlights, and finally Motherinnit, who hasn't changed but is here to take pictures as they all lean in together to fit into frame, as drastic as their height difference is. Niki is going to be edited in later, and everyone on the 'Dream SMP but nobody does Dream SMP and we're all fucking nerds' discord server is going to get a copy.

The stream wraps up there, after about two hours, and it's only about six in the evening- a far cry from the late nights and long hours from the beginning of Tommy's career, so everyone runs to their changing areas for the last time, into pajamas now, and packs away all of the clothes they wore, properly, as to not incense Karolina Zebrowska, and Jemma, Dan's wife, who would look at them disappointedly and nobody wants a sad Jemma because that means no cooing at their son. Also it just feels shitty.

Everyone huddles in Tommy, Tubbo and Ranboo's living room, and they out on UP for like, the millionth fucking time (they still cry when Ellie dies), and Tommy is leaning into Wilbur's side and feeling his mum play with the hair in his very small, stubby ponytail he's developed by being in Uni as he and Tubbo intertwine their legs together and Ranboo rests his head in the tangle of limbs, playing with his fidget cube. Puffy stays on Wilbur's side, intently texting someone and smiling the whole while, and Tommy takes a moment to reflect (something he's been getting better at doing) on how the actual hell they all got here.

The Dream SMP was always going to end- everyone knew it, if course, they were the fucking writers. But by the time they did, not only were their respective brands too closely intertwined to just… sever that quickly, but they'd become too close to even want to. So the SMP discord never shut, even though Dream and George had planned it months ago, and they continued supporting each other with their interests. Wilbur made a lot more music solo, with his band and even just random ass streams where he practiced guitar for an hour. He kept playing Minecraft, but it wasn't his main focus. A bunch of people left. More stayed. YouTube left him alone.

Dream, George and Sapnap are still Minecraft streamers, but their YouTube channels are mostly blogs of them being poor excuses of adults with other former SMP members joining in sometimes. Tommy and the Dream Team were closer than ever, even though the seeds of their friendship had been sowed when they used to linger after heavy streams together, reassuring each other that none of that was true and that nothing like… that would happen in real life, because Dream had used real abuse tactics, and those still hurt unless immediately taken care of. So they were. It was a running joke that Dream was stuck at 99 million subscribers since nobody really wanted the face reveal anymore. The other Dream team members were doing peachy.

Phil and Techno were also still primarily Minecraft streamers, but they also released things like advice videos and mental health stuff, especially for relationships. They had a new scripted series where Tommy was a minor character. The dadza jokes were still as real, and yes, outside of streaming, both of them were lovely people and responsible adults (mostly). They collaborated with DanTDM and co a lot more now.

Puffy and Niki kept doing games, but did lots of different ones, testing point and clickers to triple A titles, and making it all fucking hilarious while they were at it.

So where had that left Tommy?

After the Dream SMP, he'd kind of had no idea what to do, and he was going to University for the first time, so he just… did whatever he thought would be fun. He learned about vintage fashion from the queens themselves- Mina Le, Bernadette Banner and Karolina Zebrowska and had fun learning how to sew for the first time, fixing and making his own clothes for the first time, clunky as they were, Wilbur had cried, genuinely, when he saw the Lovejoy shirts that Tommy had made for the band. He'd found a genuine love for literature in university, so Tommy started talking to booktubers and studytubers like Jack Edwards and Noelle Stevenson. Tubbo and Ranboo had joined him, fucking around in any YouTube niche they found even remotely interesting. Eventually, they all found a happy medium- a bit of everything.

Some people obviously weren't happy with that but Tommy was happy as he was, making what he liked with his best friend's, living together close enough to most of their friends (family) to have fun and drop in on one another at ass-o-clock in the morning to comfort, to laugh. His sub count hasn't gone up in a while- most of his audience is static, with about 80-90k online on a stream at any time.p

It was a nice feeling, to have carved out a space for himself and the people he loves, and be is so, so glad that he got this chance.

Looking at his mostly asleep family, Tommy thinks 'yeah. Life is good.' as the last thought before he sleeps.