#hockey for ts

[moregraceful]

What I said to Ko btw was that Arber Xhekaj was "literally serving masc Elizabeth Holmes" in that gifset I didn't say he WAS Elizabeth Holmes. I don't think he has affect of ingénue needed to be Elizabeth Holmes. Connor Bedard, also a noted black turtleneck wearer, has that affect. If I ever wrote Rule 63 (I won't) it would just be Connor Bedard taking a Theranos-like approach to the NHL. Arber is just regular tech bro who dropped out of college bc it was boring and won't tell his colleagues he's gay but they've all seen the Scruff notifications on his phone when he's lost in the sauce (doing software engineer shit). But I suppose that's what happens when you grow up in South Bay during the Steve Jobs era...I see a zoomer wearing a black turtleneck and I go ok miss holmes and overthink whether this NHLer could gaslight gatekeep girlboss their way through the Bay Area

[msmargaretmurry]

great night on hockey twitter for caps fans

[baiyunli]

get hornier or die trying: new jersey devils kink meme

in the spirit of this post, here's a low-stress, low-commitment kink meme for the devs :) the prompt meme is open from now until the end of 2023. go crazy, and please prompt responsibly!!!

leave your prompts or claim them HERE.

some ground rules:

prompts should feature at least one player who has played for the devils at any point. they can be as fun, filthy, and/or outlandish as you'd like!

if you have a devs fic that you'd like to include in the collection but that doesn't fulfill a prompt, you can claim the first prompt (empty) and post it to the collection!

claim as many prompts as you would like. get hornier or die trying!!!!

you can choose to post anonymously or not - if you'd like it to be anonymous, either shoot me a message with your username or add it to the anonymous collection on ao3. prompts are posted anonymously by default.

tag appropriately and/or use choose not to warn.

have fun!! please direct any questions or concerns to my askbox.

[sidmalkin]

my pens didn’t make the playoffs... but the lightning, islanders, bruins, and rangers were eliminated in the first round so

[blusical]

quick question for hockeyblr. what does "ts" mean? i keep seeing it be used in certain tags and i havent gotten a clue on what it means.

[squidsquadlove]

I drove home from Canada last night, right during the Wild-Kraken game (oh, MAF, I love you, but why us why us) and it was all worth it for the little clip in the middle with Mike Benton, hero of my heart, pinning Shane Wright down in an interview and getting him to admit that a.) the first Kraken to text him with congratulations was Matty and b.) Matty looked good in the Team Canada jersey, it suited him well

[kbsd]

sorry for talkin hockey but did you see that the canes’s goalie’s nickname is fucking. koochie

never apologize for talking hockey. but yeah if i had a nickel for every hockey player nicknamed cooch or coochie i would have at least 3 nickels they’re all insane

[lakehymn]

GO AVS GO!!!!!!

[lewisiopsis]

seen in the wild

[nottodayjustin]

April 24th 2024 best hockey tweet(s) of the day

[tapedsleeves]

📚 <- it's going to vibe with 6167 for that one

6167 vague college AU under the cut

Mark hears a shuffling noise in front of him and his fingers still as he looks up from his laptop, focusing on the guy hovering awkwardly at the edge of the table Mark’s camped out in the library. Paper is slipping out from between the books in his arms, a notebook shoved in one of them closed haphazardly, his open laptop balanced awkwardly on top. 

“Hey,” he says. “I am so sorry, but the table I was at doesn’t have a wall plug and my laptop is about to die.” His, frankly impressive, eyebrows scrunch together in a wince and Mark wonders what it’s about. 

“Oh,” Mark says, “yeah sure of course.” He waves at the empty end of the table  Mark pulls his glasses off his face and tries to wipe off the huge smudge with his shirt tail. He looks through them, realizes he’s only made it worse, then sighs and pulls a disposable wet wipe out of the front pocket of his backpack. He cracks it open, looking over at the guy settling across the table from mark out of the corner of his eye. 

The mild alcohol smell of it fills his nostrils as he wipes his glasses, then wipes them on his shirt again to dry them off. Mark crumples the wipe back into its original packaging, and tucks it into the side pocket of his backpack. 

Books spread out on the desk, laptop settled in front of one of the chairs, the guy walks around the table to get to the plug on the wall on Mark’s right. Mark looks over as his shadow falls over Mark’s laptop. 

He stands up straight, and up close Mark notices his gorgeous brown eyes, even though they’re squinted with how hard he’s smiling. Smiling at Mark. He sticks his hand out, saying “Hi. I’m Max.” 

Mark looks up at him, smiling helplessly back, caught in the gravity of Max’s smile. “I’m Mark.” 

“Nice to meet you.” Max bites his bottom lip on a smile. Mark sees this, feels his cheeks go hot, and looks back at his computer. 

“Nice to meet you, too.” Max takes this as a signal to walk back around the table and work on his paper. 

Mark keeps looking at Max out of the corner of his eyes, barely focusing on the problem set in front of him. 

Max is a decent table partner, not loud doesn’t take up too much space. But he’s distractingly gorgeous, even in the terrible overhead fluorescent lighting. Mark doesn’t know what to say, so he doesn’t say anything, leaning over his scratch paper and typing the results into the answer space. 

When he’s done, he realizes he’s hungry, and reaches into his backpack for a granola bar. Max looks up at the crumple of the wrapper, head tilted slightly, a soft look in his eyes that Mark interprets as longing. 

Mark pulls another granola bar out of his bag and slides it across the table to Max. 

“Oh,” Max says, soft, “You don’t have to…” he trails off, but it’s obvious to Mark that he wants it. His hand twitches on his notebook, clenching around his pen. 

“You look hungry,” Mark says, encouraging. “Go on, it’s not a big deal.” 

“Do you have anything to drink?” Max asks, biting at the corner of his lip. 

“No?” Mark had left his water bottle on his desk when he left this morning. 

“I’ll grab us a drink.” Max stands, and pulls his wallet out of his pocket. “What kind of soda do you want? On me.” 

“Uhm,” Mark says, trying to figure out if he should take it, but he’s thirsty, and he doesn’t want to walk all the way downstairs just for one gulp of water. “Sure. A Sprite?” 

Max winks at Mark and says, “You got it.” 

“I’l uh,” Mark says as Max walks away, “watch your stuff.” 

Max smiles at Mark over his shoulder and Mark’s stomach flops. <i>Oh.</i> "Thanks," Max says. "I'll be right back."

[moregraceful]

Penguins fans I just found out you got Ryan Graves. I know you love senior citizen-coded players, so I just want you to know that in the NHL bubble, Ryan Graves was walking around BETWEEN PRACTICES with a Colson Whitehead book. He said I'm going on a two month long vacation in hell, let me bring my tbr pile. You guys are having sex and playing videos games? Not me, I'm catching up on the bestseller lists. He also likes dressing up for Halloween too much and for a while on the Avs knew his teammate's coffee orders. And he cheats at meaningless social media games. Between all these things, I feel he is "retired suburban widower with no kids" coded, which will fit the vibes of your team well in my understanding.

Also every time he gets traded, he gives an interview that is basically just like "I hope my defense partner likes me 🥺". In this respect, he is like one of those giant ass adult shelter dogs who looks so hopeful every time someone walks past his kennel and he wags his tail so hard and tries to look like such a good boy and then even when you keep walking down the row to look at puppies, he is still watching hopefully. Please give him a forever home, he has been waiting so patiently.

[msmargaretmurry]

happy ten-year anniversary to the only playoff hockey tweet we'll ever need

[baiyunli]

Yun!! You can't just drop this in the tags and then not explain yourself.

THEY WERE HOLDING HANDS HOW DO YOU KNOW! 😭 why are they the way they are

they were holding hands!!! ref - in this video on twitter around 1:18 you can see them do their little handshake and then they just don't let go??? this angle is great for seeing how jack looks up through his lashes at nico but less great for actually seeing their handshake. i stumbled upon the video this morning and literally had to watch it four times to figure out if they were really just Holding Hands outright.

[sidmalkin]

how tf do we have a league leading 6 shutouts lol

[swaymarked]

if jack and brick dont stop flirting 😐