#honesty i still dont like the bi flag

[devillexi]

how would the matsus react to their s/o coming out as bisexual ? :D love ur page!!

Osomatsu:

He would be fine with it. In all honesty, he doesn't care one way or the other about your sexuality because you chose him to be with. But he understand it's a part of you and he's happy you shared that with him.

Karamatsu:

Kara is super understanding of the courage and strength it took you to come out to him. So he's supportive and reassures you that he still loves you and that nothing will change between the two of you.

Choromatsu:

When you come out as Bi to Choromatsu, he doesn't really give you the reaction you're looking for. Just a generic reaction but you dont understand what this boy does for you later. He got you a cake that was decorated in the colors of the bisexual flag. He sweet.

Ichimatsu:

Now Ichi will just shrug and you guys go about your day normally. I mean Ichi's cool with your sexuality being whatever since you're his partner and nothing will stop him loving him.

Jyushimatsu:

He doesn't know what it means. God, Jyushi, you sunshine bean. Once you explain, he says it doesn't change how he feels about you and that he loved you either way.

Todomatsu:

He already knows but acts like he doesn't, so that when you confess, he'll act shock. But Totty knows and basically is just chill with it.

((Hmm, I'm not good at coming out asks since I never really came out. I just knew I was bi and if people asked I just said I was bi. And if someone had a problem, I don't gotta have them in my life. And they could catch these hands. I hope you liked, anon.))

[normalcryptid]

I don't actually know how to write this or even where to start but I wanted to write something for National Coming Out day, write a very rambling mess of a something but a something. I guess I will just start where all good stories should, at the beginning(except my memory is bad so half of this is probably out of order, opps)

I actually had my first gay moment in kindergarten believe it or not. I don't remember a lot of it though which is typical. All I really remember is my best friend at the time told me to kiss her during nap time. I don't remember if I did but in second grade she started crying one day because I did. Yeah, that's a long time to be upset over a small kiss. I know. Children man. They are insane. But hey, go me. Starting young. I wonder what happened to her? After second grade I moved away because my parents divorced and at that age there isn't much you can do.

Except that's not the beginning so fuck that gay moment. Hell, I don't remember it and I was five so does it even count? The beginning is really April 8, 2014. Threeish years ago. That's the day I met the person who would later become my best friend, the person I tell everything to, probably the most important one of this story besides me(definitely the most important person besides me). There was also two others. We were a small group obessesed with supernatural and just generally being nerdy. I fell out of touch with most of them. I honesty don't know where it all began. Sometime in late May maybe? I kinda sorta mayne grew on crush on a girl I knew named Kelsey and was shocked because uh? Excuse me, I am not gay?( pro tip, you are hella gay) So anyways I asked said nerdy supernatural obessesed good friends of mine about it because of fucking course I did and found out lots of stuff I didn't know. Like shit dudes, half of what I know about gayness is because of these dudes. So I figured hetroflexible. Right. That's that's a thing. Maybe I should sure why the hell not? I'm hetroflexible and hopefully this fades during summer when I don't see her. Yeah, that would definitely work. (it didn't) And well that was that. I just let that be for a while. Later I changed my label to pan because damn everyone is cute. Romantically. Not sexually, you know. More on the pan part later, probably.

So while that was going on I was also wondering hey I don't really feel sexual attraction so uh friends is there a word for someone that doesn't feel sexual attraction unless they like know each other? Amd my friends(bless them) sent me all sorts of fucking refrences to demisexuality and I st there thinking alright this, this is good. So I am demi? Definitely demi. Pretty sure this happened when I was 'straight' so the only lgbt+ part of me I had was that. I could work with that. Maybe this happened in my junior year? Shit, I don't actually remember exactly. This is a mess.

So hey back to the pan part. So fucking as stated, the crush didn't go away and I didn't feel like bi fit exactly. So what do I do? Of fucking course I go to my friends. Of fucking course I do. And what do they do? Help me with the questioning and send me references to pan and poli and all fucking sorts of queer shit. And the good little person I am who wanted to figure this the fuck out necause this was stressful read the shit out of those refrences, found out pan fit and boom. I was now a little demi pancake. Except I was still mostly attracted to guys so that was my life. It was a lie. I'm gay. I don't like guys.

So uh....shit I don't know. I lost touch with all except for James, my best friend. We had a long distance relationship for like a week because fuck I hate distance and anxiety. I hated having to break it off. I still like James. Except there are a lot of reasons why I won't date him besides distance. He already knows. (Sorry James. I love you though) I also had my first girlfriend from September 22, 2015 to January 11, 2016. We didn't do shit and I mostly said yes to her asking me out because I was secretly questioning if pan still fit. I am horrible, I know. I had a big crush on this girl named Casey the whole time though which is honestly digusting. Casey is horrible. Fuck her. She hasn't been on her tumblr in about a year but I fucking hope she reads that one part. Just fuck her. She isn't important. Anyways, Mariana(my girlfriend) broke up with me after a month of her avoiding me and me being the clingy anxiety filled person that I am being full of anxiety and clingy. She did it in front of a bunch of my other friends between classes using the "it's not you, it's me" line. I went to class in shock wantimg to cry with my hands shaking. It was hard to breathe. I am pretty sure I would have had a panic attack if I wasn't so surprised. There was an odd bit of me thinking hey maybe pan doesn't actually fit amyways, maybe I am really straight and this was all a lie. I pined after a lot of boys that I think I mostly liked because my friend Kamryn did since we always seemed to have the same taste in gays. And then I graduated high school. That was that.

Then I met a girl named Hailey. She replaced Casey once I found out how childish and bitchy Casey was as my best friend in person. I just kind of adopted pan again? but never told anyone. It was just kinda there? I had a crush on Hailey too but hey she is also a bitch so fuck her too. She is only important for one thing. So basically when I adopted pan again I started looking at girls. A lot. But me neing the oblivious fucker I am didn't fucking notice until April of this year when I created a thing called the Am I gay theory or AIGT for short where I would write notes and question myself. Needless to say, I wrote one note about how guys are still cute so obviously I am not gay but girls. I came out to Hailey on May 8th, 2017. It was hard. She was the first person I came out as gay to besides James but James knew this whole time. He was always there. He is hella important. I should mention him more because he was there for all of my questioning. Bless him. So Haiely. I came out to her in my work breakroom. I couldn't say it. The words wouldn't form on my mouth. She spent most of the break complaining about her shitty boyfriend. I threw in refrences. Small ones here and there. Jokes mostly. And then one that caught her attention( I said it mostly to myself) amd she went "Wait are you a lesbain or some shit?" and I replied with "Well not how I wanted to tell you but". That would be that except she decided to tell me I should at least kiss a boy before I decide this. No. Fuck that. Fuck you. Just fuck it. The next month a came out to a lot of my coworkers and friends mostly through small jokes. No one cared. Most of them already knew. I moved jobs. Come out to my new work friends really casually. (God this is a ramblimg paragrap.) No one cared or even blinked an eye. We made jokes. We still do. All was merry. I love my new work friends. Kayla keeps asking me if I talked to any hot babes and wanting to find me a girlfriend. People there ask about my nonexistent boyfriend and I talk to kayla about it and she assures me that she never thought I was straight from the moment she walked up to me to now(of fucking course). Why does everyone there assume I have a boyfriend? I own a shirt that says I kiss girls? Just why?

So then pride cameup. Here in Virginia it is later then most prides. It is always the end of September and I asked my paretns to go because I was supportive and I had lots of friends going. I was not out to them at the time. Then ironically Kayla and I had an entire conversation where she said my paretns definitely know I am gay and I said nah they suspect but don't know. The very next day was the Friday before pride and my mom calls me into the living room to basically say hey, I know you are gay. I had to text Kayla and tell her she was right. Amd then I had to comfirm to my dad that hey, I am gay. Surprise except not really because you already knew. Apparently longer then I knew myself. (on a side note, pride was amazing and it is where I got my I kiss girls shirt. I also got a pride flag that now hangs in my window) So now I am happily out as gay.

I also don't identify as demi anymore. I am a lot more ace then I originally thought as I realized in the middle of a conversation with you guessed it James. Also I have been questioning my gender for quite a while now? Hence the Elliot thing. Everyone who knows me in person calls me Zoe so they probably question why I always put Elliot down as a name with questions and why my personal tag is el. Well, I guess you know now. I still go by Zoe so dont feel bad. Call me whatever. I am comfortable with both. I let it rest for a bit because questioning is stressful and I didn't need a label. Well guess who is back on their shit? Me. So yeah, that is my rambling mess of a coming out story so I am just goimg to wrap it up.

Have a great National Coming Out day from your local gay ace gender questioning pal, kids.