#hopefully I'll be getting to replies soon I've been caught up in getting ready for artfight ;w;

[em-dualism]

so, the grimace shake, huh.

[duskwoodgirl4life]

MC's POV

It's been 3 years since I last saw or heard from Jake, he promised he would find a way for us to be together. I've tried reaching out to him but I've got nothing that night we spent together is one I can't forget. Especially now that I have Jaden to look after Jake as a son, a 3 years old little boy. I've told Jaden about his daddy. I told him that daddy is away and will be back soon. I don't know how much longer I can keep this lie up. It's breaking my heart knowing that Jake is out there somewhere for all I know he's been caught. I write a message to him every night. I send pictures of Jaden and tell him how Jaden's day has been.

I've just put Jaden to bed. He's not been feeling well these past couple of nights, but thankfully he should sleep through now the meds have kicked in. I'm sitting in bed with the TV on low trying to read a book but my thoughts keep drifting back to Jake. I wish that he was next to me right now. I wish that we were cuddled up together. I want so badly to kiss him goodnight as we drift off to sleep. I want to wake up to him every morning. I wish for so many things I would do anything just to be in his arms. I decided to grab my phone and send him my nightly message and photo of Jaden.

Hello my angel,

I hope you are safe and well? Jaden is hopefully starting to feel better after his high fever. I took him to the doctor's and he's been given some antibiotics. He painted you a picture today with his new paint set. I talk to him about you everyday. I miss you so much Jake I want you here with me. I love you so much it hurts. I'm going to try and get some sleep. I'm still waking up in the night that hasn't stopped.

I love you Jake

Yours always and forever

MC

Xxxxxxxxx

I send the message to Jake and put my phone back down on my bedside table turning my TV off and the lamp. I pull the covers up and curly up into a ball and let the tears roll down my face.

Jake's POV

I've not been able to see MC for 3 years now. I haven't been able to send her any messages. It's been killing me so much I want to be able to reply to all her messages but I can't, I can't yet. She's been sending me updates on our baby boy. He's beautiful, he looks just like his mum. MC sends me nightly pictures of him and tells me all about his day. I'm glad he's feeling a little better knowing that he was sick upsets me. I am so sorry MC that I can not reach out to you. I want you to know I have saved every single message you have sent me.

I have just received the message you sent tonight, it breaks my heart to know how much you are hurting. I really hope that soon I can reach out to you. I want to be able to tell you how much I love you. I want to tell the whole world that I am in love with you but I want you to move on. I can't keep letting you wait for me like this. I need you to find happiness with someone else. As much as it will break me completely it's the best thing for you my angel no matter what I will always care for you.

The next morning Jaden came bouncing into MCs room and jumping on the bed, "mummy, mummy" "morning sweetheart, are you feeling better?" "Can we go to the park today mummy?" "I'll take that as a yes, of course let's get breakfast first tho" they both got out of bed MC switched the coffee machine on to make the coffee. Then she grabbed Jaden's bowl and made him some cereal. She put the bowl down in front of him and he started eating his breakfast. After breakfast MC got Jaden ready for their trip out to the park they met up with Jessy and Richy with their little girl Bella. She was the same age as Jaden and loved playing together. "Hi MC" the redhead beamed as MC got closer "hello Jaden, haven't you got big" Jessy gave Jaden a big hug "hi Jessy, hello Bella look at you in your princess dress" Bella spun round showing off her dress.

The two kids went off to play with Richy while MC and Jessy sat down on a bench to talk "how have you been? Have you heard from him?" "Nope he's not contacted me I send him updates but nothing" "I know this might sound harsh but you should get out there go on a date" "I don't know Jessy, I want to but I" "come on you can do this I've got the perfect guy for you" "not another blind date Jessy" "no, no it's not like it was last time this guy is perfect he's called Phil he owns a bar" "alright Jessy, I get the picture did Phil put you up to this?" "Erm, no comment so is that a yes?" Jessy looked up at MC with her best puppy dog eyes look. "Argh okay then tell him to pick me up tonight you can have Jaden for the night" "perfect I'll call him now thanks MC"

Later that night MC was getting ready for her date with Phil, when her phone buzzed he picked it up and saw a message from Phil.

Phil: Hey gorgeous, can't wait for our date later. I've booked us a table at the new Italian place that's just opened up.

MC: Hey Phil, that's sounds perfect looking forward to it see you later X

MC's POV

What am I doing? Why did I listen to Jessy and agree to going on this date with Phil? I could text him back and cancel. If I do that, what excuse do I give? I just told him I was looking forward to the date. I guess I have no option but to go through with this. I guess Jessy is right. I should get out there and date new people. After finishing my makeup I go over to my wardrobe and try to pick out something to wear for this date. I finally managed to pick out a red dress that hugged my figure. While I'm trying to find some shoes I find Jake's hoodie that he left me. I pick it up and hold it close to me. His scent is still on the hoodie. I can feel my eyes starting to water and my heart is breaking so much. Jake, why did you have to leave me? The tears start to fall.

I can't do this, I can't go out on this date tonight, come on MC get a grip you can do this I know I can. I just sit on the floor holding Jake's hoodie in my arms not wanting to let it go. After a few minutes I manage to put myself together putting Jake's hoodie back on the wardrobe. I fix my makeup and get rid of the black streaks down my face. I grab a pair of black heels and put them on. Once the doorbell rings Phil is here to pick me up for our date. Grabbing my jacket and keys I open the door and I am greeted by Phil holding my favorite flowers.

Jake's POV

MC is going on a date with Phil tonight I can feel the anger starting to build up inside me why Phil of all people. I know I wanted her to move on but not like this now with him I can see from the messages he is taking her to an Italian restaurant. That's not her favorite place to go. She loves Chinese, not Italian. I pull myself away from my computer and go and wash my face in the bathroom. Anger still taking over my body I punch the bathroom mirror. Blood dripping from my hand I turn the tap on and run the water putting my hand underneath. I can't help but wince at the pain my hand is in.

Grabbing the first aid box from the shelf, I dry my hand and put a bandage around my hand. I head back to my computer and try to concentrate on my task at hand. I try for hours to try and finish this program off but my thoughts keep going back to MC. Have I really lost her for good? Do I let her carry on with her life or do I go and win back her heart and we can be together.

"Thanks Phil for a wonderful evening I've had a lovely time" "your welcome MC I've waited for this moment for a long time you're really something special" as they arrived back at MCs apartment Phil kissed MC softly on the cheek. MC turned the kiss around and pulled Phil closer to her, closing the grab between them. "Wow I wasn't expecting that, your lips are so soft MC" MC didn't respond she just crashed her lips back onto Phil's. While she was kissing Phil she managed to open the door. Once inside MC pushed Phil up against the wall running her hands all over his body.

All of a sudden MC stopped the kiss "what's wrong MC? Is everything okay?" "I'm sorry Phil I can't do this" "it's okay, listen when you're ready give me a call and we can do this again" "thanks Phil" MC showed Phil out of her apartment. She closed the door and sank back down to the floor all she could think about was Jake. He was the only man she wanted to be with and she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. MC pulled herself off the floor and went into the kitchen taking a bottle of wine out of the fridge. She poured herself a glass and went and sat by the window.

As she was sitting there watching the world go by she could have sworn she saw a figure dressed all on black walking towards the apartment building. She didn't think anything of it and went to top up her glass moments later there was a knock at the door. Putting her glass down she went to open the door and saw a figure dressed in black looking up at her. "J-Jake? Is that you? A-are you really here? "Yes MC I am, can I come in?" MC stepped to one side and let Jake into the apartment.

"MC I want to explain why I left you 3 years ago, it was never my intention to leave you for that long. I am so incredibly sorry for everything I have put you through. I had to put some distance between us. I was given a deal the FBI wanted me to help bring down a major drug dealer. Part of the deal was to stay away from you while I helped them. I wanted to tell you so badly but I wasn't allowed. It's all over now I am a free man. I wanted to come and see you but I thought you were better off without me."

"How dare you!! How dare you decide what is best for me, I've been waiting 3 years for you to come back. I've been bringing up your son alone. I've spent 3 years waiting for you to come back. I didn't know if you were okay. I thought they had killed you Jake!!'

The tears broke their way out from MCs eyes Jake put his arms around her holding her close. "I never stopped loving you MC my feelings for you have never changed" MC looked up at Jake's ocean blue eyes looking back at her. "I love you to Jake I never stopped loving you" Jake put his fingers under MCs chin lifting her head up and kissed her softly. MC pulled away from the kiss "we have the place to ourselves Jaden's at Jessy's for the night he'll be back tomorrow morning if you want to meet him" "I'd love to MC, I've saved all the photos of him"

The next morning MC woke up with the biggest smile on her face, Jake was lying next to her sound asleep. She couldn't help but stroke his cheek as he slept and kiss him softly on the lips. Jake started to wake up kissing MC back "good morning my love did you sleep well?" "Next to you Jake it was perfect, we have a couple hours before Jaden's back" "how can I say no"

A few hours later MC and Jake had gotten up and had coffee and breakfast, there was a knock at the door MC went to answer it "hi my little man, you have a good time at auntie Jessy's?" "We had a camp out, it was the best mummy" MC picked Jaden up and gave him a hug. "Listen son, there is someone here who has been wanting to meet you. Do you want to meet them?" "Is it daddy mummy? Is daddy back from his work?" "Hello son" "daddy" Jaden went running over to Jake and gave him a massive hug. "What's going on MC? When did Jake come back?" "He came back last night Jessy, I couldn't believe it I'm so happy" "is he back for good?" "Yeah he's back for good he's not going anywhere"

And that's what Jake did, he made MC a promise and he fulfilled it, he didn't want to leave ever again he loves his family more than anything. "I love you MC" "I love you to Jake"

[loverrrgirl]

KISMET- Austin Butler x reader - PART 12

Warnings: minors leave now. Nothing happens in this chapter but things are happening SO soon. And honestly this chapter is cute to me so let me know that you think happens next!

Here’s the masterlist

Luv u

Once we were in the car, I suddenly felt very excited. I had no idea where he was taking me. I hate surprises, typically. But somehow I just knew I could trust him.

I knew how it sounded. Don't be so naive so Stella. But there really was something about him. His energy, his presence, his sincerity in everything he said and everything he felt. He was different. And he was good. Through and through.

I caught him a couple of times. Peeking over at me while he was driving. And I was certainly peeking back.

"I love this dress by the way. Thank you so much." I smiled at him. It was very me. And it was special that even though he hadn't known me long, he seemed to capture my essence. In dress form anyways

"Yeah, yeah you're welcome. It looks amazing on you." He gave me a side smile and but his bottom just a little bit. Just enough to make me melt into a literal puddle.

I bit the inside of my lip nervously. Hopefully he didn't pick up on that. I hated that I did it, but old habits die hard, or whatever the saying is.

"Thanks. Where are you taking me anyways?" I raised an eyebrow at him. It could have been a corn field in the middle of nowhere and a picnic. It could have been to Chili's. Somehow I knew I'd follow this man anywhere and everywhere he wanted to take me. I was cornfield ready.

"It's called Moonshadows. It's in Malibu. I've actually never been but I've heard it's great. I figured we might as well try it if we're going out." He said as he looked over at me. His eyes were dancing. I could tell he was excited. He liked to try new things.

So do I.

"Mmmm. Can't wait to try it." I said quietly. We were at a stop light now. And I couldn't stop thinking about what to do if anyone recognized him.

Just follow his lead Stella.

"So, Stella. You didn't do much on your birthday. Understandably. But if you could have any birthday dessert, what would it be? And why?" He inquired.

"Hmmmmm. That's a hard one. I guess it would have to be a carrot cake cupcake. Which probably isn't the average choice. But when carrot cake is done right, it's superior to any other kind and you can't change my mind." I said playfully.

He looked at me. He seemed intrigued. "Noted. How many candles do I have to fit on to one cupcake?"

"Twenty four now I guess. I'm old. I'm ancient. I'm withering away as we speak." I laughed. Getting older is weird. He laughed, and his cheeks lit up.

"Then I'm really ancient." He said, with a few chuckles left in his breath.

"Oh, I found that receipt you left me today. In my suit case. Would you believe me if I told you that I hadn't opened my suit case at all until today?" I asked quietly, feeling bad. I hoped he wasn't waiting around for me to call him. I would have if I found the note sooner.

"I did start to worry you just didn't want to see me again. But I considered that maybe you just hadn't seen it yet." He said, he ran his thumb across his bottom lip again.

Jesus it's so sexy when he does that. I wonder if he knows how sexy it is.

"Oh god. No. Not at all. I'd have called you days ago. At least to get my sweater back." I side eyed him. I wasn't sure yet what his humor threshold was but I couldn't wait to find out.

"Mm. Mhmmm." He replied. With a smirk. He wasn't insulted that I said it. His smirk told me he didn't mind it at all. But I couldn't tell exactly what he was thinking. But I'd do nearly anything to hear him respond that way to me again.

The rest of the drive, we just caught up about our last few days. He told me about visiting Ashley and how he even told her about how I left the sweater in his car. She thought I might have done it on purpose. I laughed at that one. A super clever tactic, and one I never would have thought of. But I'll keep it in the back of my mind in case it's useful in the future.

We finally arrived after nearly an hour and a half. But I only knew because I checked the time before putting my phone in my purse. It felt like maybe 20 minutes had passed. He was so easy to talk with.

Austin's Point of View

I parked the car and got out to open Stella's door. I held out my hand and as she grabbed it, she moved one leg out of the car and then the other. My breath hitched.

She isn't wearing any panties. Naughty girl.

I had to try to figure out how to keep my composure for the rest of the night knowing that golden little bit of information. I pulled her around to the other side of the car door so I could close the door and adjust myself a little bit behind the door. Thankfully she was looking out at the beach view and didn't notice my discomfort.

"Ready?" I asked, wishing I didn't have to interrupt the way she was lost in thought, gazing out at the beach. I wondered what she was thinking.

"Ready." She replied, turning her head towards me. She slipped her arm into the curve of mine, holding on delicately as we walked inside.

As we entered, the hostess greeted us. I leaned in to her ear and asked if we could have the most private table she had open that was outside. She blushed a little at my closeness and then nodded. We followed her up the stairs and on to the outdoor terrace. We were the only ones up here. Just the way I liked it.

I pulled Stella's chair out for her and as she sat, I pushed it slightly in. And it was cute, the way she looked up at me afterwards. Like she'd never had a man do that for her before.

I took my seat on the other end of the small table. I smiled, chuckled even, at the view I had. I couldn't imagine sitting across from anything or anyone more beautiful than she was right now. The way the last of the sunlight in the sky made her skin glow. The way the fire of the sun was dancing between her bright green eyes. The way she bit the inside of her lip when she was nervous about something. The way she wasn't wearing any panties underneath the dress I got her for dinner.

"What's your drink of choice?" I asked her. Curious on her answer. A drink of choice said a lot about a person. She took a second to look over the cocktails menu.

"The Phoenix rising drink looks stellar" she said, slightly looking up at me from the menu. "What about you?"  She asked me. She was trying to read me too.

A tequila girl. Fantastic.

"I'm a whiskey guy myself. I'm going to get the Black Manhattan." I said, wondering if she had an opinion on whiskey.

"Mmmm. It's been a long time since I've had one of those." She said, seemingly thinking back to the time she tried it. "It was alright." She said to me, direct eye contact and a smirk.

"Mmm. Alright huh?" I replied.

Just then our waitress came by to ask for our drink order. "I'll take a Black Manhattan. And she'll have a Phoenix Rising. Thank you, Anna." I replied to her, reading her name tag so I could address her by name for the rest of night. I smiled and nodded as she walked away.

I looked back at Stella to read her expression since I'd ordered her drink for her. It was a habit of mine. One I quite enjoyed. She had a slight smirk on her face as she was looking over the dinner menu.

"Do you know what you're eating?" She asked me.

A good question. I supposed I'd better look at the menu some instead of at her. I already knew what I'd probably get but figured I'd double check that nothing sounded better.

"The filet mignon probably. You can never go wrong with a well cooked steak." I finally said after checking through the menu. "What are you thinking?"

"The salmon sounds delicious." She said "but so does the pear salad."

She was doing that thing girls do sometimes. Make it seem like they would almost rather eat just a salad instead of a well rounded meal. Or she was nervous of the cost. Salmon it is then. She probably hadn't eaten much all day.

Our waitress came back with our drinks and asked if we were ready to order. "Yes actually. We'll do the filet mignon, cooked medium rare. And the Scottish salmon. Thank you" I smiled again at Anna. She nodded and went to put our orders in.

"Thank you" Stella said. "I wish it were summer. Then it would still be light enough to walk to the beach after this."

"I hope you don't mind. I actually booked us a hotel room with a beach view. Two beds of course. And if you'd like your own room we can do that instead. Just in case we get too tired to drive back tonight. Or if we wanted to check out the view in the morning." I told her. I hoped she wouldn't think it was presumptuous of me. I wasn't expecting or planning anything other than a nice romantic evening of getting to know each other more and spend time together.

I even packed her an over night bag in case she agreed. Sweatpants and a t shirt of mine. Essential toiletries. During my shopping outing yesterday, I saw this little sundress that I thought would look nice on her. I packed that away in the bag I packed for her too.

"That sounds really nice. Beach sunrises happen to be my favorite kind." She smiled. She was also biting the inside of her lip. She was nervous. Hopefully not for long.

As we ate our dinner, we talked, and joked, and laughed. We told each other some favorite childhood memories. Some of our embarrassing stories.

Once we finished, I gave Anna my card. Stella offered to pay. Cute. I wondered how many dates in it would take her to stop offering.

I stood up to offer Stella my hand as she stood from her seat. I checked the time on my watch. 9:15. Dammit. The patisseries were all closed around here.

"I have somewhere very special to take you" I told Stella in a joking, mysterious voice. I knew where I was talking her. And I hoped she would find the simple humor in it.

[ladydeznutz]

When He Loved Me (Peter Parker x Reader)

A/N: My first fic and it's angst that came into my head around 3am. I've always wanted to write fics, but I didn't like how I wrote and I was embarrassed. First time writing for others so I tried to keep away from using just she/her pronouns, but if that's what you'd like just lemme know

I can write for other fandoms, and imma make a list of the fandoms I like bc I have so many I forget. I'll also add some other things if it interests me. Not comfortable with nsfw just yet so apologies. Anyways, enjoy the fic ig and please give me criticism if you see something wrong

idk how tumblr works with spacing and all that so hopefully this comes decent looking

Prompt: Please, don't leave me.

TW: S**cide mention

Every day had started to feel the same to you for a while now.

It started when he began missing date nights with you. He was always so excited about them, and then they were happening less and less often. You still saw him on occasion, but it felt more like "business" than anything else.

You didn't get the same giddy feeling you used to get when you'd see him; it felt like going out with him was more of a chore. You couldn't even complain to him about it even if you wanted to. Anytime you did see him long enough, he was always gone within a second, always in a rush. You never knew what he even did with himself or if he was thinking about you at all.

It definitely didn't help that you'd always catch him hanging out with his friends. You confronted Ned about it, but he was always so dismissive. Hell, you had even talked to Michelle about the whole thing. At first, she sympathized, but then it was as if a switch was flipped. You used to go to her to vent about Peter and the relationship. Now, she was practically telling you that you were overreacting.

----

You felt like you were going to have a mental breakdown.

Learning about a loved one's passing is always one of the hardest things for anyone to deal with, especially when it's someone you deeply care about.

You had just received the news that your best friend had killed himself a couple of hours ago.

You didn't know how to feel.

You couldn't wrap your head around it. There was no warning.

You and he had been friends since childhood, and you knew each other so well that neither one of you could even remember a time when the other wasn't around.

Your hands shook as you picked up the phone to call Peter. Your tears finally fell as you listened to the constant ringing of the phone, and you knew he wasn't going to answer. Rage grew within you as you heard his voicemail message causing you to throw your phone across the room. It crashed into the wall and broke, but you didn't pay any mind to it as you fell to the ground and let out a wailed sob.

Why did this have to happen?

You could barely catch your breath between sobs.

Your body shook.

You didn't care about anything anymore.

You didn't care about Peter anymore.

----

Weeks had passed, and Peter was exhausted.

Tracking down a gang, taking them down, and meeting another Spider-Man had just been a lot for him to take in. He was so tired, he didn't even want to think about it anymore. His back ached as he climbed through his window.

He was just so damned tired.

He stripped out of his suit, took off his web-shooters, and placed them back in his closet. Then, he took a quick shower.

His job was a bit easier to have Ned and MJ know he was Spider-Man. Now he just had to tell you.

Peter stood in the middle of the room and weighed out what would happen. He felt sorry for lying to you, and he knew that he was being distant. He just didn't have the courage to deal with any of it because he was worried about you. He couldn't lose you too.

As Peter lied down to finally get some rest, he wondered how you were doing. Karen had said you tried calling him, but he couldn't answer he had been in the middle of a stakeout.

He got up and rummaged through his book bag to get his phone, turning it on to scroll through his messages. He sat up as he realized how many he had gotten. Had something happened?

As he scrolled through, his heart broke. So many people had posted about the loss of Jay and were gossiping about why he did it. When he finally went through them all, he looked at your one missed call and gulped.

You had called him that day, and he didn't pick up.

He clicked the voice mail and listened to the message. All that he could hear were your pained sniffles, a shout, and then the line cut off.

He felt sick as he replayed the message.

Peter already felt awful about lying to you; he had to fix this. He quickly texted you, put his web-shooters back on, and was ut the window.

He knew the way to your house, so it took him no time to et there. As he was getting ready to knock on your window, he did a double-take and took a closer look.

Someone was sitting in your room; it looked like he had been waiting for you. Peter quirked an eyebrow as he looked at the guy. He was wearing a red and green jacket with shorts and sneakers. He also looked like he was wearing tights?

Suddenly, you walked into the room, so Peter backed away from the window to hide in the shadows. You seemed to be upset as you were wiping your eyes quite a bit.

"I'm sorry Miles. I didn't think I'd start crying like that," you said as you sat on your bed.

"Hey, it's okay," he replied as he stood up and moved closer to you. You sniffled as you tried to regain your composure. Peter didn't quite know how to react. Who was this? What was going on?

"I just...he..." you groan out in frustration as you grip your hair. Miles' eyes widen as he sees tears start flowing from your eyes again.

"You wanna talk about it?" he asks as he wraps an arm around your shoulders. You shrug as you shake your head.

"It's complicated, and besides, that's what our therapy's for" you chuckle dryly. Miles' eyes wander the room as he tries to think of something to do to cheer you up. "How 'bout we go out tonight?" he suggests.

"I don't like the tone of that voice" you sass as you turn to give him a look. Peter watches Miles turn around, and his eyes widen. Miles was wearing a suit, a Spider-Man suit. The same Spider-Man he saw the other week.

"Any place you wanna go to, we'll go" he adds with a cheeky smile. "Really? You're not busy?" You cross your arms as you stare him down.

"Nah, night's been quiet. Besides, I might be busy tomorrow, then you'd miss your favorite person in the world" he winks as you begin to smile. Peter's heart sank as he realized what was happening. He thwipped a web to the building across from yours and sat down on the edge of the roof. Pulling out his phone, he sent you a text.

Can we talk tomorrow?

Giggling could be heard from across the street. Peter looked up and bit his lip as you glanced at your phone and threw it on your bed. You got onto Miles' back, and you both swung away.

----

After you tried calling Peter that day, you stopped reaching out to him altogether. You decided that you'd wait to talk to him until he finally realized you weren't there. It had been about five weeks, and in those five weeks, you had gone to therapy and counseling.

You met Miles in counseling. He was sweet but seemed to get off topic a lot. When you were getting ready to leave one session, he had come up to you, put his hand on your shoulder, and let out a simple "Hey." One thing led to another, and you had both bonded over your losses. You went to Miles' uncle's funeral, and he went to Jay's funeral with you.

You were currently sitting on a swing at the playground as you waited for Peter. It was taking him forever to show, and at this point, you wanted to get this whole conversation over with.

Frowning, you looked around, wondering why he was taking so long. He should've been here by now. Maybe he decided not to come after all.

When that thought crossed your mind, you scoffed and stood up. Before you could go anywhere, however, you felt someone gently grab your hand. Looking back, you saw Peter staring at you with a small smile on his face.

"You came."

"Of course I did"

Peter pulls you towards him and wraps his arms around you. You take a deep breath as you stare off towards the slide. He pulls away when he realizes you're not hugging him back. The both of you pull away awkwardly as you look at each other.

"Peter-" "(Y/N)-" both of you speak at the same time.

"I- I have o tell you something" he starts with a stutter. You wait patiently as you motion for him to continue. "I know th-that I've been....not here for you for a while-" he cuts himself off when he hears you scoff.

"I.....I had these things, and I should've told you as soon as we started dating, and I'm sorry. I know I've been an asshole, more than that actually" you roll your eyes and shake your head as he continues.

"I just.....I love you, and I want you to know that even though I don't show it a lot" he finishes as he rubs the back of his head nervously.

The good thing about coming to this park was that there was usually no one here, and you were glad no one was here right now because boy were you fuming. "Told me about what Parker?" Your hand goes to your hip as you glare at him.

"W-Well....uhm......that guy that you talk to.......I'm like him I guess. Spider-Man." Your eyes widen when you hear the first part. "How the hell do you know I've been talking to someone?"

Peter stumbles with his words as he realizes he's been caught red-handed, "Uh...I was gonna visit yesterday, and I kinda....saw you..talking to him....." You narrow your eyes as you pick up a stick and throw it at him. He ducked before he could get hit, but you were already in his face.

"You were spying on me?!"

"I-I wasn't trying to! I was just-"

"Christ Peter!" All this time of you not being here, and now all of a sudden you just wanna show up out of nowhere because of what?! Jay?! Is that why you're finally talking to me?!" Panic stirs in Peter's eyes as he tries to come up with an excuse.

"I tried so hard to get you to talk to me, and you only wanna talk now because of that shit?! Peter, I can't do this shit with you anymore. I don't care if you're Spider-Man; what was the point of not telling me in the first place?! We live in New York for God's sake!!"

Your face is red as you frustratingly wipe away your tears with your forearm. Peter stays silent as he watches you; he can't say anything right now because you've hit the nail on the head.

"Y-You know what, fuck this. I can't do this shit any-anymore, Peter. But please tel-tell me; w-what did I do wrong? I di-did my best to keep both of us h-h-happy. Please, just tell me what I did wr-wrong." Your words are barely recognizable as you hold yourself to keep you're shaking body still.

Peter steps forward, but instead of stopping him like he thought you would, he cups your face gently as he looks into your eyes.

"(Y/N).....I'm so sorry I made you think this was all your fault. You did make me happy; you still do. I just...I've been so busy being Spider-man that I've neglected you, and I'm sorry for that. But I do still love you, (Y/N). I swear I'll stop doing everything just for you. I-I'll give up being Spider-Man."

You watch him unravel as he keeps talking. You can't bring yourself to care, however, as he spills his heart out. Too much disappointment has built up over the months.

"Pete...."

"Please......(Y/N), just give me another chance. I'll do anything, just please, don't leave me." His voice is soft and insecure as he begs you, almost quivering as he says it. It doesn't invoke any sort of feeling in you though. His sad eyes watch as you pull away from him,

"I'm sorry Peter" you whisper softly as you turn around and walk away.

He doesn't run after you or even shout.

Peter simply watches you walk away until you're out of view. The only thing he can hear is your footsteps as they fade into the distance.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: Alright so...this whole thing was based on how I could see him being Spider-Man in the beginning ig? Imo I feel like between him and Miles, the latter would be the first to tell you he's Spider-Man

And I always felt like him being away like that with no real reason would make an s/o feel like it's their fault or sumn. Like, I've always seen fics where he and the reader always make up about it, but I wanted to try the bad ending where even though he had good intentions, he's just not ready to handle being a hero, student, and partner.

[roselen-mylady]

the game | part two

Part One

Steve hated to admit it but he had always been a jealous person. As a child he was jealous of the way so many other kids had dads that tucked them in at night. As a teen he was jealous of how easily Bucky made women swoon. As an adult he was jealous of Stark when he attempted to woo Peggy. And now he was jealous because it seemed everyone but himself was able to easily talk and even kiss Y/n.

Oh how badly he had wanted to.

And he almost did during that game of spin the bottle. Yet he'd lost his nerve. And lost his chance.

Thor's laughter had drawn his full attention toward the pair. Not that his eye had ever left Y/n but now the man before him was blatantly being ignored as Steve's entire focus was on Y/n and Thor. He strained to hear whatever was being said by her but he could hardly pay attention as Thor lifted her into the air and spun her around like a princess.

He could've done that.

His blood nearly boiled as he watched Thor kiss her. It was innocent, he knew that, but he just couldn't help it. He was angry at the world and Thor but mostly himself.

Before Thanos he thought he'd have all the time he needed to work up to confessing his feelings for her while she stayed in Wakanda watching after his best friend. But when she was snapped away he realized he had made a horrible mistake. A mistake he regretted every minute of every day during those long five years.

But now he had a chance to fix it.

Yet he hadn't been able to talk to her since she returned. The friendship they'd had before then was bashful but strong yet during her absence he had distanced himself from the idea of her in order to cope.

When she returned all the emotions he felt came rushing back in waves. And he was still blowing it.

•••

"I'm so tired of watching these two pine after one another." Wanda spoke suddenly, making Bucky turn toward her, dragging his gaze away from the pair.

"What do you mean?" Bucky asked, looking back at them as Wanda came to stand at his side, watching them with him.

"You mean you haven't noticed? Y/n's in love with Steve. Steve's in love with Y/n. It's agonizing to watch, really." She sighed, rather vexed with the entire situation. It was her after all who had watched them through the years. They'd known each other ever since before the accords and all that time they'd had an awkward friendship in which feelings were obvious on both ends yet neither had the courage to act.

She hated to imagine how Y/n's death might've affected him but yet it still hadn't given him the will of the courage to act. It pained her to watch the two fall back into their old ways.

"Y/n loves Steve?" Bucky mumbled, disbelief evident in his features. Wanda nodded, her eyes trailing Y/n as she made her way to Peter, who was standing haphazardly close to Steve.

"More than life itself, though she'll never admit it. I saw it when I had to enter her thoughts years ago during a mission we had in Germany." Wanda explained. She remembered the overwhelming feeling of Y/n's emotions. They crashed into her stronger than any wave could and even after all these years they were just as strong.

"Then why haven't they done anything?" Bucky asked. He looked down at her finding the same lost expression on her face that was more than likely on his.

"I don't know. Y/n told me last week the same thing she told me all those years ago. Things are too complicated and she can't risk losing him if he doesn't feel the same." Wanda quoted Y/n, her annoyance seeping through her words.

Bucky scoffed, recognizing the excuse as something very similar to Steve's and he shook his head, feeling the same defeat Wanda did. "Just like them to be too stupid to be happy." He groaned, looking up at them.

"Yeah. But hopefully when he kisses her one of them will do something." Wanda hoped her statement might encourage their boldness.

"Unless it's a repeat of spin the bottle." Bucky said, dreading the chance that it might happen. Wanda cringed, shaking her head.

"Y/n won't allow it. She takes the game too seriously." She replied, more to convince herself than Bucky. It was true. Y/n would get Steve to kiss her whether it was for the win or her own motives. That is if her nerves didn't take over.

"Let's hope."

•••

"Well, if it isn't Spiderman." Y/n called out, grabbing Peter's attention. He smiled brightly, finally being called by his preferred name and not Spiderboy.

"Ms. Y/n! What-what are you doing here?" Peter's sore attempt at small talk made him wince but thankfully Y/n didn't seem to mind, looking down at his glass.

"Just mingling. Whatcha drinking?" She asked curiously, wondering if Tony had allowed the poor boy a drink while dealing with all the people who no doubt asked him millions of questions regarding his presence and age.

"Sprite. Mr. Stark said he can't allow me to 'drink and swing'." Peter adjusted his glass, using his fingers as quotations before letting out a short giggle at the phrase.

Y/n laughed as well, trying to appear relaxed as she felt a certain pair of eyes on her. Steve was standing just a few feet away with Tony, not within earshot but close enough to send butterflies to her stomach. With each kiss she collected she felt more and more anxious knowing eventually she'd reach Steve. Was she ready for that?

"Well, that simply won't do. It's a party, Peter, and I can't allow you to not drink. When I was your age Tony was slipping me drinks left and right, it's only fair I pass on the tradition." She explained, leaning forward carefully as her hand brushed his.

He blushed, his eyes widening like saucers as she skillfully slipped his glass out of his hand, replacing it with her own. Glancing at Tony as if expecting to be caught, he was relieved to find his father figure blissfully unaware of their treachery.

"Ms. Y/n, I really shouldn't-"

"Don't worry, I'll drive you home if you're that worried. I got you bro." Y/n promised, nudging his arm with a kind smile. "Now tell me you've at least tried champagne. You've been to like three of these parties now." She laughed her smile growing as he joined in.

"Yeah, well, I mean a little bit from my Aunt May's glass." Y/n shook her head, putting her hand on his shoulder, a dramatic look of sorrow on her face.

"My poor boy. I have many things to share with you. Speaking of which, Shuri is asking if you're coming with me to Wakanda next week." Y/n sipped the soda watching as Peter's fingers danced happily against his own glass.

"Really?! I mean, of course! If you want me to. I've never been, what's it like?" Peter rambled, his face lit up in excitement, making Y/n chuckle at how thrilled the boy was.

"You'll see soon enough. I'll come get you next Friday and bring your suit, I'm sure Shuri would love to tinker with it." Y/n advised. Peter nodded wildly, psyched for such a trip.

"Thank you, Ms. Y/n." Peter grinned. Y/n wrapped an arm around his shoulders turning him in the direction of where Tony was standing.

"Peter, Y/n is fine. Trust me, I'm one of the few people in this world who know what it's like to have Tony as a father figure and anyone who can handle that is okay in my book." Y/n laughed, pointing at the man in question.

As if sensing their shit talking, Tony turned around, catching sight of them. A suspicious glare was sent their way but Y/n could hardly notice it as another figure stepped into view, following Tony's gaze.

It was then that they were forced to look at one another head on. Not at a glance or a sneaky peek. They might as well have been standing in front of one another as they both froze.

If Y/n's heart decided to stop in that instant, she wouldn't blame it. The pure intensity of Steve's gaze was enough to make her shudder and she fought her every molecule to stare back. There was a warmth in his eyes, one that sent a flutter of giddiness through her.

A small smile crept onto his face and Y/n gasped, forcing herself to return the gesture and not just gawk at him. She was at a loss for words. It was the first time since Thanos that he had given her any sort of acknowledgement. While it hurt that their friendship had seemed to diminish while she'd been gone, she knew that rekindling it was a two way street. But now he was smiling at her. And she was smiling back.

She hadn't realized she'd been holding her breath until Peter stepped in front of her, his hands resting on her shoulders and his brows furrowed in concern. "Y/n? Are you okay?" His voice was soothing and it helped her recover her loss of breath from her moment with Steve.

"Huh? Uh, yeah. I'm fine. Just...uh, thinking." She mumbled, her eyes drifting back to Steve once more. His smile had faltered slightly, his face beginning to match Peter's concern but with a small curve of her lips, she assured him that his worry was senseless.

"About the game?"

"Hmm?" Y/n questioned, directing her attention to the boy once more. Peter eyed his glass carefully before taking a cautious sip.

"The game you play with Ms. Natasha and Ms. Wanda. You're playing, right? I saw you earlier with Thor." He explained. Y/n's face flushed, a little embarrassed that her moment with Thor had been witnessed by someone she knew. What if Steve saw? Would he be jealous?

Y/n nearly shook her head, convincing herself that she wasn't worth being jealous over. Especially to Steve.

"Oh, yeah. We are. That reminds me, you like Star Wars right?" She smirked, looking at him as she sipped his soda, the pink on his cheeks making her giggle.

"Well, yeah, I mean lots of people do. I'm not the only one-that would be weird. Unless you like it, not that you liking it would make it less weird. Not that you're not weird! Weird-"

"Peter!" Y/n laughed, putting her hand on his as she lightly brought the drink down. "Whew boy, maybe alcohol isn't your thing. Then again you've always been a rambler." She gently took the drink back from him, watching as a wave of relief washed over him.

"Have you eaten yet? I think there's hors d'oeuvres around here somewhere." She muttered, glancing around for any servers. Peter shook his head accepting his soda back before looking back up at her.

"No I'm okay, really." He told her, his heart warming at how much she seemed to care. It was nice and he enjoyed his relationship with Y/n. She allowed him to do things with her like travel, patrol, even hang out in the lab and she quickly became another idol of his.

"Are you thinking of watching Star Wars?" He asked her, referring to her previous question. She smiled, shaking her head.

"No, I've already seen it, I'm just thinking of a pick up line for the game. Tonight's rules are if you like my line I get a kiss and I fully intend on winning tonight." Peter nearly choked on air as his eyes widened yet again.

"A kiss? From me?" Y/n giggled, tapping her finger to her cheek.

"Don't get ahead of yourself, Parker. A kiss on the cheek will do." She teased, making his face impossibly redder. He shook his head frantically trying to display as best he could that it wasn't his intention.

"I'm kidding. Now are you ready to hear my cheesy pick up line or will I just have to forfeit?" Peter's head didn't seem to stop shaking as he urged her to continue. "Alright here goes."

"Hey, sweetheart. Do you like Star Wars cause Yoda only one for me." With a wink she smiled, enjoying the scrunch of Peter's nose as he cringed at the line. 

"Not doing it for ya?" She laughed. Peter scoffed, trying to hide the smile that threatened to show.

"I hate to admit it, but it was kinda funny." He sighed, ashamed to have enjoyed such a horrible line. Y/n's grin grew, pointing to her cheek once more.

"Then pay up. I've got two more kisses to collect." Peter smiled, leaning forward and pecking the space her finger had been. "Thank you. Now find someone to mess with. I won't be the only one reeking havoc tonight." She poked a stern finger into his chest. With some convincing he eventually promised to at least pull a prank on Sam and Bucky.

With that she began to make her way to Tony. A knot formed in her stomach as she paced in his direction yet it wasn't Tony who made her nervous. No, only Steve Rogers could make her feel so squeamish and turn her legs to jelly. And she was making her way straight toward him.

Y/n could barely hear the click of her heels and the chatter of those around her over the pep talk she was giving herself in her head. She refused to embarrass herself in front of him. This was going to be her second chance and she wouldn't allow her nerves to ruin it again.

"As I live and breathe! Do I stand before Iron Man and Captain America? I do hope this isn't a dream." Steve's soft chuckle seemed to go straight to her core and she feared her heart might beat right out of her chest.

"Don't encourage her, Cap." Tony grumbled, turning his gaze to Y/n. "Well, if it isn't my favorite niece."

"Your only niece." Y/n corrected, a short glare focused on him as he smirked.

"Let me guess you're here to win the game. Let's hear it so poor Cap here can get a turn. I don't think he's kissed a woman since the 40s." Tony leaned down, whispering the last part and making Y/n giggle.

"Hey!" Steve objected in vain. But what Y/n said next sent any duty to protect his pride out the window.

"That's a crying shame. The ladies must not know what they're missing." Y/n froze as the words left her mouth. What was she thinking? Her face burned and she hid behind her glass trying to muffle her embarrassed groan with her champagne.

"Jeez, get a room." Steve and Y/n both glared at Tony but he didn't seem to care, instead shrugging innocently.

"Alright, here's your line you impatient ass." Y/n scoffed, deciding to use a particularly bad line for the annoying man she dared call her father figure.

"Was that it?" He smirked.

"Shut up, I gotta turn around and approach this again or else it won't work." She hissed, earning a heartfelt laugh from Steve. Twice. She'd made him laugh twice. Her heart was practically singing at the thought. Maybe she'd actually get to kiss him?

With more determination than before, she turned around, taking a few steps away before dramatically turning back to them. Using theatrics she no doubt learned from Tony Stark himself, she put on a smile before holding her arms out in a grand gesture.

"Well I'm here, what's your next two wishes?"

"That was horrendous." Tony said almost immediately while Steve tried to contain his laughter behind them.

"Well, I couldn't very well waste my best lines on you now could I?" Y/n jested, taking the glass in his hand and pouring what remained of his drink into her now empty glass.

Tony's teasing expression fell as he painfully watched Y/n sip her glass. "I can't believe you're related to me." Y/n smiled back at him proudly.

"Only by marriage." She shrugged. Tony sighed, leaning down and pressing a fatherly kiss to her forehead just along her hairline.

"Thank god." He ignored Y/n's squinted stare, turning to Steve. "I think I'm going to go get another drink, since mine was so blatantly stolen." Tony glanced at Y/n who shamelessly smirked.

"But first I wanna hear your pick up line for Cap. Please be something patriotic. Maybe sing him the national anthem." He suggested, nudging Steve forward to where he stood before Y/n.

Not expecting Tony's push, Steve stumbled nearly crashing into Y/n but thankfully he caught himself, only having a redder face than before.

"I'm not sure the national anthem is a pick up line, Tony." Y/n replied, focusing on anything but Steve. At this distance she could smell the familiar cologne and feel the heat radiating from him. It reminded her all too much of the days before the snap. When he'd hold her whenever she was hurt or when he'd pick her up to launch her toward an enemy. Reminded her of the few hugs they'd managed to share.

Reminded her of their last before she dusted in his arms.

"I don't know. He's really horny for America, it might work." Tony refuted, earning a threatening gaze from both Steve and his niece.

"Fine, y'know what? Have privacy or whatever in the middle of this crowded party. See if I care." Tony said, a little butt hurt that he wouldn't be able to witness the awkward exchange first hand.

He was no idiot when it came to his niece's attraction to the super soldier. While at first he disapproved, even more so when it led to her being on the opposite side that day in Berlin, years had led to forgiveness. He couldn't really stay mad at her even if he tried. Only sorry he hadn't apologized before the snap.

"Thank you, Tony." Y/n spoke quietly, sending him a grateful look. Whatever was about to happen already made her nervous, she didn't think doing it with Tony there would be possible.

"Yeah, yeah." He waved a dismissive hand, beginning to walk away.

It wasn't until he had Morgan that he realized he was already a father. Y/n had been his first and no matter his guilt, she would always forgive him. Always need him.

"Don't get carried away." He threatened suddenly, pointing to his eyes before twisting his hand back to them with a menacing squint.

Y/n rolled her eyes, looking back to Steve as Tony finally left.

"He's protective." Y/n explained, trying to be annoyed. It was actually kinda touching the way he cared despite his usual selfish smartass exterior.

"For good reason." Steve agreed, making Y/n's head tilt confused.

"You think I can't take care of myself?" She questioned defensively, ready to prove her worth no matter who he was.

"No, of course you can. Just-..." He trailed off, a sorrowful expression taking hold of his features against his will. "We've both failed you before. Numerous times." Steve confessed, his eyes falling downcast as Y/n realized what he'd meant.

She’d never truly thought about how her absence might have affected him. Before the snap he never gave any hint that he wanted to be more than a friend to her. But now she studied that look in his eye, that one she hadn’t recognized before. Heartbreak. 

"Steve, you didn't fail me." She insisted. Her hand had come to his own, grasping lightly at his loose fingers and ignoring the buzz in her skin and the rapid pace of her heart.

"No, I did. I turned you against your family. I got you arrested. I dragged you back into the fight and...you got snapped away." His voice broke at the end, years of depression and misery washing over him all over again.

"It wasn't your fault. We all lost that day." Y/n argued but her words didn't seem to stick.

"I'll never forgive myself." Steve's words were barely above a whisper, each syllable falling further into him unable to escape.

The sight alone made her heart ache but it was the way he'd spoken that truly shook her. They were the words of a broken man, a man that had lost it all. Had she done that to him? Did he care about her like that? Maybe he was scared too.

“Well, it's a good thing I already did.” Y/n smiled hoping to bring back the smile that she'd been able to give him moments before. Her hand stayed planted to his own more terrified to release it than she was to keep holding it. Would she ever work up the courage to do it again?

Steve looked back up at her, a tender glimmer in his eye as he moved his hand to hold her own. “I missed you.”

The statement alone wasn't nearly enough to convey how much he'd longed for her in those five years, left without any hope of ever getting her back. Didn’t show her the sleepless nights or the endless tears. Didn’t show her first few years he spent, alone and secluded. Didn’t show her how many times he prayed to any god that would listen for them to bring her back. 

But her eyes seemed to tell him that she understood. Y/n knew exactly how he felt even if she'd been relieved of it for five years. She remembered when she was arrested, screaming at the guards that they'd never find Steve. Remembered the sobs that racked through her when he came to free her, relieved he’d made it out of the war safely. Remembered their time on the run, unable to tell him how she felt. Remembered volunteering to stay with Bucky when Steve's worry became too much. Remembered him coming back and bring a war with him. Remembered him catching her before she dusted, too fast for her to tell him her greatest truth. 

She loved him.

“I missed you too.” She said softly, her face burning under his gentle gaze. They’d become so unbearably close at that point, making her breath ragged and her heart race. 

Clearing her throat, she looked away, trying not to reveal how flustered he made her. “So do you wanna hear my pick up line or not?” She once again changed the subject, making Steve smile at her lovingly. 

“Definitely.” He replied. 

“Alright. On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tonight?” She gave him the first one that came to find, silently groaning when she realized she'd done exactly what Tony suggested. Curse their horribly similar minds. 

"That's terrible." Steve chuckled, staring at her with adoration unlike he'd ever done before. She was absolutely perfect in his eyes and he refused to waste anymore time being scared. 

"You didn't like that? I have more." Y/n rambled, oblivious toward Steve's affectionate gaze. "Can I tie your shoes? I don't want you falling for anyone else." 

Steve laughed, shaking his head as he stepping forward and shifting his hand to her waist as he pulled her closer. 

The action on flustered her further, dragging another pick up line out of her. "Or I like your last name, can we share it?" 

Steve's smile grew, his heart swelling with each word. He loved listening to her lines even if they were cheesy. But he was determined now and he wouldn't let either of their nerves stop them anymore. 

"I lost my number, can I have-"

Suddenly he leaned forward, cutting her sentence short as his lips latched onto her own. 

The kiss was so tender she practically melted in his arms, her hand coming to his chest while the other shifted to behind his neck, her fingers filtering through the lower part of his hair. His grip around her waist tightened as his heart pounded under her palms, the aftermath of anticipation rushing through his chest. 

It was effortless the way they molded together and it left him breathless. He couldn't believe he'd never just kissed her before and after believing all these years he'd never get the chance to, he was so grateful to have her now. 

"I've waited too long for that. I think I'm gonna need interest." Y/n gasped as they pulled away her eyes half lidded as she tried to process what had happened. 

"Was that another pick up line?" Steve's brows furrowed, his lips a beautiful shade of darker pink. 

Y/n smiled up at him, pulling him close once more. "Shut up." 

••• 

"Who's gonna tell her she didn't win?" Wanda questioned suddenly, glancing over at Nat. 

Sam raised his hands in surrender, passing off the duty as soon as possible to avoid any type of rage the woman might've wreaked on him. 

"I don't think she'll really care at this point." Nat spoke, pointing a finger toward the couple across the room. 

They didn't seem to care that they were in a room full of people, instead remaining engrossed in each other as they stared at each other lovingly. It was touching really but what Nat assumed to be their confessions had lost Y/n the game. 

"Wait does this mean the games with stop?" Sam questioned suddenly. 

"No, it'll just make them more interesting." Nat smirked.

[huntertheblackwolf]

The Morning After

(2.0k) Thank you guys for waiting! (a whole month 👀) Also, shout out to @eisukevint ! They were really nice to help me out, so an extra thanks to you!!💕 Alright, let's go!

Chapter III: The Meeting

‘Hey Hunter? Do you think it's possible for the dead to surround the living? Cause I do.'

  Hunter jolted, gasping for air, hands going up to claw at his throat. 

"Easy Hunter, easy! Shh shhh, it's alright man, shh, it's alright. That's it. Good boy." Someone said, gently scratching his head, allowing him to breathe and relax, letting him get himself together. Looking up, he saw Silviya and Conner, his eyes having discoloration, but the swelling coming down, looked at him in concern.

 "Hey man", Conner whispered, "how are ya? You really took that hit." 

Blinking, Hunter reached up to feel for a bump or something, but instead, he felt cotton bandages wrapped on his head. Finally looking around, he noticed the white walls and smelled something sharp. 

'Rubbing alcohol. The hotel's clinic then.'

 Tilting his head, he looked towards Silviya and let out a small croon, seeing as she was upset. Closing her eyes, Silviya sighed and crossed her eyes. 

"What the hell Hunter? I thought you were the most sensible out of all of us? I do have to give you credit though, you really want all out." Sighing again, she added, "I can't really be mad with you though. We would have done the same thing." Shaking her head, she started to chuckle. "I can't believe you took a glass bottle to the head for a guy you don't even know." 

Conner, who was busy checking Hunter's head, nodded and smirked. 

"Feel in love with him when he defended you? Is that it?" 

Rolling his eyes, Hunter snorted and shook his head. He started to sign his response. 

"He wore Sam's colors. I reacted on instinct and took the blow. That's all there is to it." 

Rubbing his eyes, he asked a question."What time is it? How did you find me?" 

 Leaving Hunter's bandages alone, Conner answered, pulling out his phone to check the time. 

 "It's currently 11:48 in the morning." He put away his phone and continued. "I'm guessing those men who saved you from last night, brought you here. We knew it was you when someone mentioned a guy wearing sweatpants and a black silky looking nightshirt being dragged out of the bar. That was about 30 minutes ago give or take. I'm guessing they put you up here and left you here in case of the risk of a head injury developing later on." Conner finished. 

Silviya snorted and spoke. 

 "I think we've overstayed our welcome. The nurses have been giving us nasty looks after we barged in. You alright enough to get out of here Hunter?" 

He nodded, ready to leave and get this thing over with. Grunting, he got up and immediately started to tilt sideways before catching himself. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Opening them, he started to walk towards the doors, following after Conner and Silviya who held out his hoodie from last night.

Placing it on, he pulled up the hood as they walked towards the elevator and waited for it. Getting on, Silviya pushed for their floor. It was quiet for a while until: 

  "I still can't believe you did that Hunter. Like holy shit man!" Conner laughed, jabbing Silviya by her side. She rolled her eyes playfully until she snorted and barked out a sudden laugh. 

 "Fuck! I just realized that was the first time in a while you got into a fight!" She snorted, as all three exited the elevator, going to Hunter's room. "What was it like?! The adrenaline? The way you beat that man up! No remorse! I-" She stopped, taking notice of a man from last night. Hunter looked up, but faced away, too tired to even converse with a stranger. He let Silviya and Conner do the talking as always. 

"Oh, hello there! You're the man from last night who helped Hunter out. The one Hunter took the blow for, from last night. Thank you for that!" Silviya said, stepping forward, a smile on her face. "We also", she nudged Conner, who looked at them and smiled, "want to apologize for the inconvenience. We didn't think he would do it in such an open area. Again, apologies for the inconvenience, but thank you for helping him." She finished off, bowing her head slightly, Conner smiling. 

 "It's alright, really. Actually, I wanted to invite Hunter to dinner, to thank him for protecting me. As well as all of you of course. Think of it as an apology for what occurred last night." Said the man, dressed in purple. 

 "Oh! Don't worry about that!" Silviya said, shaking her head.

"I insist. I would feel horrible if you didn't."

"We would love to then! It sounds wonderful as well to be honest. " Silviya responded, Conner nodding along.

 "I also wanted to give this back." The man continued, holding out a cellphone as Hunter looked up. 

 Checking his pockets and hoodie, he found it to be missing. He grabbed it, bowing his head, subtly poking Silviya in the ribs. 

 "He says thank you." She grinned. "Where do you want us to meet you at, Mr.-? 

 "Apologizes, my name is Eisuke Ichinomiya. A pleasure." He said, looking away from Hunter, smiling at Silviya, reaching his hand out. 

"Likewise Mr. Ichinomiya. My name is Silviya." She said, shaking the man's hand and then letting go. "This is-" 

"I'm Conner! Nice ta meetcha man!" He waved, before shaking the outstretched hand. 

"It's very nice to meet you as well." Ichinomiya replied as Silviya playfully rolled her eyes. 

"And you've already met Hunter. He doesn't really talk, so you'll have to make do with silence on his end." Silviya said as Hunter simply nodded his head towards Ichinomiya, who smiled at him. She coughed politely."So, where would you like us to meet you?" 

"There's a restaurant that I think all of you would enjoy. I'll be sending a car at 7 if that's alright with all of you?" 

  "Sure, we'll be ready by then. Uh, is it formal?" Conner asked. 

  "Yes." 

  "Alright, then we'll get ready. Thanks again man!" 

  "Of course. I'll be going then and I hope to be seeing all of you at 7." 

  "We'll be ready by then, thank you." Silviya responded, smiling at him. 

  Eisuke smiled back before walking away, towards the elevator. 

"Well, that took a turn." Conner said as soon as the elevator doors closed. "First, you get beat up and next you get invited to dinner. This place is fucking looney. It's my type of hotel!" He finished, chuckling. 

Silviya chuckled with him as she walked towards her room, Conner trailing behind. "I want everyone to be ready by 6:30 or 6:50 at least." She said, opening the door, letting Conner in first. "We'll see you later Hunter. Hopefully you're still up for it by then." She said before waving and entering the room, closing the door. 

  Hunter nodded and entered his room, planning to at least rest for a while, before even thinking about getting ready at all.

             ˏ 𓏧 𓏲 𓏲 𓏲 𓋒 𓏲 𓏲 𓏲 𓏲 𓏧 ˎ 

"And where are you going Boss?" Baba asked. "Another dinner party?" 

Eisuke huffed, clasping on his cuffs. "None of your business." 

"You're going to the casino then? We'll go with you! Can't imagine what ladies you might attract this time around!" Baba enthusiastic said, not minding the harsh response, Ota nodding along, grinning. 

"No. You will all stay here. I'm not your babysitter or your entertainment. Go somewhere else, I don't care." Eisuke said, straightening out his jacket. 

"Oh, come on Boss! You know we just want to be there with you. And have fun, but that's besides the point! It'll be fun!" Baba responded back, Ota stretching next to him. 

 "What will? Never mind. With how you fools act, I'm almost certain it's something that you alone will find entertaining." A voice said, coming from the balcony as they entered the room. "I am curious; however, on where you're going Eisuke. You normally don't enjoy doing business on the weekends. Even if you do go to parties, you'll let them know what's going on." Soryu asked, putting away his phone. 

Eisuke rolled his eyes. "If you must know Oh, I'm going out to Misoguigawa for dinner and I've invited the man from last night who saved me and his group of friends, as an apology for what my hotel didn't do. I still can't believe-" He muttered under his breath. "Anyways, I'm meeting them at the restaurant. Now, if-". He was cut off as Ota butted in. 

"You know, I think I'm good friends with the restaurants owner, especially after I donated an art piece of mine. I think it'll be fun if we visited them. Don't you think so Baba?" 

"Oh, absolutely Ota! Should we go with Boss? I don't think he'll mind us going. After all, he does owe us-" 

"I don't owe anything to you fools." 

"-from last night, after helping him with those men. I think I was almost injured during the fight too." 

"You're absolutely right Baba! I think I almost broke my nose when one of the men was throwing his arms around." 

Soryu hummed and then smirked. "I think you owe us dinner Ichinomiya. After all, we did help you, especially kicking out those men for you. Don't want to stain your reputation, now do we?" 

Eisuke was quiet, glaring at them, before turning away. "Do what you will, I don't care. The car is waiting." He said as he walked away. 

Soryu walked after him, the other two grinning towards each other as they followed him 

out.

             ˏ 𓏧 𓏲 𓏲 𓏲 𓋒 𓏲 𓏲 𓏲 𓏲 𓏧 ˎ 

Conner gave a low whistle as he caught a glimpse of the restaurant as the usher showed them the way to the table Ichinomiya had reserved for them. "Damn, this place ain't have bad." 

Silviya nodded along as Hunter trailed after her. As the usher started to slow a bit, she noticed the group of people already there. "Hey, isn't that the group of people who helped out Ichinomiya?" 

"Hm? Oh yeah! I guess he invited them too?" 

With the usher coming to a stop and showing them their seats, he spoke. 

"A server will be here shortly." He said, smiling, before quickly leaving. 

Eisuke stood up and smiled, reaching his hand out. "Thank you all for coming. I hope the ride was up to your standards?" 

Silviya shook his hand and grinned. "Oh yes! It was lovely! Thank you." Letting go, he reached out his hand for Conner to shake. "Thanks for the ride man. It was joy." Conner smiled as he let go. Eisuke nodded and smiled back, reaching out towards Hunter next. Hunter nodded his head, face expressionless, as he shook Eisuke's hand. 

"These are my acquaintances." Eisuke continued as Hunter let him go, nodding towards the rest of the table. "They wanted to join me. I hope you all don't mind?" 

"No, of course not." Silviya said as she nodded towards them. "A pleasure! My name is Silviya." She greeted as she shook hands with everyone, Conner falling swiftly. "The name's Conner. Nice ta meet cha'!" 

"Mitsunair Baba. A pleasure to be greeting beautiful women such as yourself." He smiled, winking at Silviya and grinned at Conner. "Hey, what's up!" 

"Ota Kisaki, nice to meet all of you!" 

"Soryu Oh. Good evening." 

'Why do they all look familiar? Especially the one dressed in all black?' Soryu thought as he finished introducing himself. 

"And this is Hunter. He doesn't talk, so you'll be hearing a lot of silence from his end." 

Silviya said as the other three men looked at Hunter expectantly. They all sat down as the introductions came to an end. 

"Oh, well. It's still very nice to meet you." Baba said, before reaching out to shake Hunter's hand, Ota doing the same. Hunter simply nodded his head towards them. 

'Hunter? I know that name…'

Soryu reached out to shake his hand and as Hunter clasping it firmly, a chill ran down Soryu's back. Narrowing his eyes, Soryu looked Hunter over as they released hands, Hunter doing the same. Spotting the fading bite mark on Oh's neck, and the yellow bruises, Hunter realized who it was. As did Soryu when he finally recognized the man from a few nights ago. 

'Fuck.'

'Shit.'

(My very good friend delivered this masterpiece yesterday, but I forgot to put it here! I'm so happy she made it though, so I hope you guys enjoy it!😊💕)

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Fifty-One

Table of Content or Part Fifty

Wattpad

Word count: 4.6K

Warning(s): explicit language, drug abuse, minor sexual situations, violence

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My stomach aches with laughter as Duff delivers his punchline of his joke, my hands coming up to cover my mouth as I try to chew my fried mozzarella stick and he takes a sip of his beer, laughing as I snort, which only causes me to laugh even harder, until the both of us are laughing possibly the ugliest anyone has ever laughed, and I'm discarding my food into a napkin because I'm laughing too hard to try to chew it.

My eyes are watering, and thin tears roll down my cheeks.

We finally calm down, seeing people glaring at us for being so loud, but we ignore them.

"That was pretty good." I give him credit where credit is due, shifting in my seat a little and taking in a sharp breath as my sore thigh takes notice of the movement.

"Are you okay?" He asks me and I nod.

"It's still sore." I tell him, trying not to take notice of the expression on his face that flashes for a split second.

Nobody could understand why the hell I went right back home when I got out of the hospital like Nikki hadn't put my life in serious danger.

It wasn't like Nikki had intentionally shot at me. He didnt know what the hell I was and just kicked into to survival mode.

I didn't see the big deal in staying with him.

Tommy, Vince and Mick didn't even know what really happened. Doc had told them the same thing he told me to tell the press: I dropped Nikki's gun on accident, while trying to move it, and it went off and caught me.

He didn't want them to know the truth because they were working on the new album, and he didn't want to "create conflict" within the group.

So the only people that knew the truth aside from Fred, Doc and Nikki, was Duff, Slash, Steven, Izzy and Axl.

It wasn't long after that, that Axl informed me he wrote "You're Crazy" about me as a joke, but realized he was pretty right to write it because, in his words, "you staying with the crackhead heroin junkie that already treats you like shit, then fucking shot you, just solidifies my theory that you're actually, medically, out of your mind, and your insanity isn't just 'to be determined' anymore" and I asked him if he "wanted to be the pot or the kettle?"

The irony of him--out of all people--calling anybody else "crazy" was beyond me.

Thirty-two years later and he still dedicates the song to me every time they play it live.

After we're done eating our Sunday lunch, we pay and head to my car, slowly, because I'm limping and Duff's walking slow so he doesn't leave me.

"So, I kinda did something for your late birthday present." He informs me out of nowhere and I raise my brows.

"What do you mean?" I ask, fumbling to get my keys from my purse, shielding my eyes from the harsh sun in my face as we head to the parking lot.

"Mandy and I broke up." He states and I raise my brows.

"...You broke up with your girlfriend as my birthday present?" I'm confused and he chuckles it off.

"No!" He nervously rubs at the back of his neck. "She broke up with me, actually, but that's not what your present is."

"She broke up with you? Are you okay?" I ask.

"It's a girl, Viv. There's plenty more decent girls to choose from when I'm ready to be in a relationship again." He shrugs.

"Did she tell you why she was breaking things off?" I question.

"Just needed space or time or something like that, I don't know. I was kinda drunk when she called to tell me."

"She broke up with you over a phone call?" I raise my voice, my nostrils flaring.

"Viv, chill out." He let's out with a laugh, nudging me with his arm. "You haven't let me explain the good part of this."

"Well then explain." I clear my throat and he rubs his lips together.

"I talked to Nikki last night 'cause he and Tommy came around to hangout with us for a little while." He explains.

"Mhm?"

"I mentioned the fact that you were kinda getting back into dancing and he said he'd been meaning to ask me about it because you'd told him about Mandy letting you use their rehearsal space to dance."

"She didn't even know I was using it, you just sneak me in whenever she's not there. Well, at least, you did. I'm assuming she got the key back from you."

"You're not letting me finish." He points out and I roll my eyes and sigh.

"Okay. I'm listening."

"Nikki and I conspired together, and I'm buying the place from Mandy, and Nikki is going to pay for any renovations and cleaning up it probably definitely needs."

I stop walking, my face falling, unable to say anything.

"So...happy birthday?" He cautiously finishes, not able to gauge how I'm gonna react.

I just start crying.

"I-I'm sorry, if you didn't want that we can--"

"--I'm not crying because I'm upset, I'm crying because I'm happy." I tell him, wiping my running mascara.

"Viv." He smiles a little, and I hug him to me, my arms around him tightly as I squeeze my eyes closed.

"Thank you." I mumble to him and he kisses at my hair for a second.

"Happy birthday."

I knew on Nikki's part it was an attempt to apologize without actually saying "I'm sorry for shooting you" because if he said "I'm sorry" it would mean admitting he was wrong and I was right about his drug use.

And Vivian could never be right about anyone over-doing it with their bad habits.

I shut the front door, slipping my kitten heels off by the door before I calmly step through the house to get to our bedroom so I can change from my church dress.

Nikki's passed out in our bed. I've gotten to where I have to wake him up and get him to bed or just sleep next to him in the closet.

I accidentally rolled over and stabbed myself with one of his used needles a few nights ago so I've been praying he's been using clean needles and isn't going to transfer anything weird to me.

I change clothes and get into our bed, watching him sleep, at least I think he's asleep.

"How was church?" He asks me, keeping his liner smudged eyes shut and I run the tip of my finger over his bare chest.

"It was good." I reply. "It ran late again today." I lie, not wanting him to find out about Duff and I eating lunch again.

"Oh." He yawns, turning over to face me and I get a little closer to him, hooking my leg around his hip and he grins softly, resting his hand on the curve of my back.

"So, Zutaut called again." I tell him and he sighs out.

"Nope." He sits up and I untangle from him, rolling my eyes as I follow him into the bathroom.

"You didn't even let me finish." I argue, crossing my arms and leaning against the doorway as he puts the toilet seat up to pee.

"I don't need to let you finish. This is the second time he's called in the three days and you told me the first time he called he was wondering if I'd be up to produce your friends' album."

"I love how they're strictly just my friends as soon they inconvenience you. Which I don't even consider this an inconvenience."

"Then what is it, Viv?" He flushes the toilet and steps to the shower to turn it on.

"An opportunity to actually listen to our--'our' meaning 'your's, too'--friends' music. And help them get it put down on an album that actually stays true to their sound instead of trying to add all the extra bull crap that everyone else that's wanted to produce them, has done." I state as he gets his clothes off and gets into the shower.

"What's in it for me?" He asks over the sound of the water.

"Um, the satisfaction of helping a hungry band reach their dreams and share their music? Also helping them get money because once the kids see the album is produced by Nikki Sixx they're gonna buy it because they trust your opinion on good rock music?" I suggest hopefully.

"I want blowjobs." He cuts through the sentimental atmosphere I created in my mind surrounding friendship and dedication, and I glare at the shower as my face drops from it's smile into an unamused expression. "Like, on-command blowjobs. Anytime, anywhere."

"You want me to drop to my knees the second you snap your fingers? Ha!" I scoff.

"Then I'm not even gonna consider producing them."

"Oh my goodness gracious, fine!" I give up, letting out a heavy sigh. "For how long?"

"Um, until I come?"

"No, I mean over what duration of time do I have to sacrifice the wellbeing of my jaw for your disgusting and degrading satisfaction?"

"Until you get arthritic to the point of not being able to get down that low without throwing a joint out of place." He says and I raise a brow, yanking the shower open.

"I am not gonna be in my fifties getting on my knees every time you want some head." I state and he laughs.

"If I have to give you on-command BJs, you have to go down on me on-command."

"You don't even have to tell me to eat you out, I'll gladly do it without the say-so." He says as he shapes his lathered hair straight up with his hands and I have to keep myself from laughing at his childishness. "And can you close that, It's kinda nippley out there." He motions outside of the shower and I shake my head a little before pinning my hair off of my shoulders with a hair clip on our counter and start pulling my clothes off.

I get in with him and he smirks.

"Am I in trouble?" He asks and I raise my brows before reaching my hands up to squish down on his hair that he's got perfectly sculpted upward with shampoo. "No, Viv!" He tries to protect it, laughing loudly.

Tom Zutaut had pressed at me to convince Nikki to at least consider producing "Appetite for Destruction."

Everyone that was interested in Guns N' Roses wanted to alter their music or add unnecessary elements to their signature raw sound. He knew Nikki advocated for people not compromising on what they want, especially with their music, and knew he would never try to produce the album the way he wanted it, but the way the band wanted it.

The only problem there was in the plan...

I roll my eyes as Nikki takes a bump of coke to try to pull himself out of his heroin induced stupor as I fall back in the seat across from him in the limousine, wiping my smudged lipstick from around my mouth, panting, hot and bothered because he started something and couldn't get his prick up to finish it.

Oh, the joys of body function inhibiting drugs.

"Okay, c'mon." He says as he takes a deep breath.

I get back on him to straddle his lap, my hands pulling my dress up my hips and pushing my panties aside while he rubs at himself.

It doesn't seem like he's getting any harder, and the mood is ruined.

"Babe, it's okay." I sigh out, calmly, although I'm frustrated.

"Fuck." He curses, just as irritated, his boot harshly kicking the edge of the seats across from us, his fingers grasping at his hair.

I fix my panties back and move off of him, smoothing my dress back down as he tucks himself back into his pants and laces them back up.

"I'm sorry, Viv." He turns his head to the side to look at me while he's leaning his head back.

"It's fine." I assure him. "Not like I need to be putting that much pressure on my thigh anyway." I add and the atmosphere in the car immediately tenses up.

He doesn't reply, putting his shades on to prepare for the flashing cameras bound to find us.

He despises the press.

I don't blame him.

Once we get stopped, Nikki's opening the door, tightly grasping at my hand.

"Nikki! Nikki!" They all seem to be shouting, followed by questions such as, "you guys working on the album?", "what are some songs we can expect on the new album?", "when are you releasing a new record?", "is it true you went to rehab for heroin?", "are you still on drugs?"

"Vivian, there's pregnancy rumors, do you know who, in the band, is the father?" Someone shouts and I ignore them, keeping my head down and my eyes closed, letting Nikki cut through the reporters and get us into the venue to meet Tom and let Nikki experience his first official Guns N' Roses show.

...Nikki hated it.

He was ready to leave only two songs in and showed absolutely no interest in spending his time producing them.

He wouldn't even really pin point what exactly he didn't like about their music or their playing, he just didn't like it.

He admits now that he was so fucked up that night, in particular, that he wouldn't have known what was good music if it hit him in the face.

I figured that might have been the case since he was the first one to put in for Guns N' Roses to join Mötley Crüe on the "Girls, Girls, Girls" tour and advocate for their music.

His mood swings gave me whiplash.

"What do you think so far?" Tom asks Nikki as Nikki takes a sip of his drink.

"I don't see the fuss." He states, and Tom and I exchange looks, confused.

"W-What?" I ask, furrowing my brows. "Are you kidding me?"

"Did I stutter?"

"W--C'mon, Nikki, you haven't even heard some of their other stuff. These kids have the potential to be extraordinary, they're almost there. You can't just write them off like this."

"I'm not writing anybody off. They're my friends and I dig their enthusiasm but I can barely find the time to work on our own album, let alone produce someone else's and they're not striking me enough to make me want to sacrifice more of my time to produce them."

"Baby, if you would just give them a chan--"

"--Viv, I said 'no'." He sternly scolds me and tears swell up in my eyes because I could have sworn Nikki would have really liked their music.

"I'll be right back." I tell them, stepping to the bathroom to dry my tears.

At the time I thought Nikki was just being an asshole.

He didn't tell me he didn't want to produce them because he wouldn't have done the kind of job they deserved for their talent on their debut album.

He wanted to do right by them, and that meant staying as far away from their music as possible.

He didn't tell anyone that because that would have been him admitting he had a problem.

"Lose the nasty attitude, Vivian." Nikki orders as I stomp into our house while he shuts the front door behind him, locking it.

"Why? You gonna toss me aside, too?" I hiss, taking my jacket off and throwing my purse onto the coffee table, crossing my arms.

"Will you just drop it? It's not like there aren't thousands of producers that would love to help them out." He takes his jacket off, tossing it to the couch.

"What is wrong with their music? Is it their sound, their personality, their--"

"--Vivian, I said 'drop it'!" He barks.

"I have every right to be angry, Nikki! You clearly might not give a fuck about them but they are my friends--who I know good and damn well have immense talent and there's even some of it that's yet to be untapped--and I just wanted you to give them an actual shot at achieving the thing all of them have worked their asses off for and dreamed about since they were kids!" I throw my hands up.

"I'm done talking about this." He states, stepping to our bedroom.

"I'm not!" I take my heel off and throw it as hard as I can at his head.

It hits the back of his hair and he stops in his tracks.

"Tom said it himself, and you heard him: Guns N' Roses will be the biggest rock n roll band in the world if they just get someone behind them that can guide them to where they need to be!" I ball my fists up at my sides, digging my nails into my palms.

Nikki just slowly turns to face me, his eyes wild, his breathing labored, and a out of line theory sprouts in my mind, but the way he's been acting lately it won't surprise me if it's true.

"Is that why you won't help them?" I ask him, cutting my eyes. "Because they're possibly going to dethrone Mötley Crüe?"

The fact that I'm insinuating he gives a fuck about bullshit "competition", especially in regards to his friends, just infuriates him more. I see it in his eyes.

He just turns back around and goes to our bedroom, slamming the door shut.

I roll my jaw, my eyes drifting to the beautiful display of his gold and platinum records on the wall beside the hallway that leads to guest bedrooms.

My skin of my knuckles is splitting open when my fist collides with the glass of the "Shout at the Devil" Gold award.

Platinum's next.

Just before I'm going for "Too Fast for Love", Nikki's screaming from our bedroom doorway, Jack Daniel's in hand.

"What the fuck are you doing?!" He shouts and I just shoot him a glare before taking the "Too Fast for Love" plaque off the wall. "Put the fucking plaque down Vivian." Nikki orders, stepping closer to me.

"Produce their album." I demand, acting as if I'm going to drop it.

"Put. It. Down. Vivian."

"Or what? You'll shoot me again?" I taunt him and he grinds his teeth. "Produce their album." I repeat.

"Go to hell, crazy bitch." He snaps.

"You go first!" I holler back, hurling the award at the wall and it crashes into another plaque and they both shatter to pieces.

I turn around just in time to see Nikki pouring Jack all over my Bible that he'd plucked from the coffee table, just before pulling his lighter out.

"Stop!" I shriek, rushing to him.

I'm too late, though, and he's lighting it up and throwing it into the empty fire place just as I make it to him.

A God-awful feeling of dread fills me as Sikki looks very proud of himself.

I can't even look at him right now.

Walking to the kitchen to wash my bleeding hand off and get it wrapped up, I start to think a mile a minute.

My heart clenches in my chest as tears line my lashes.

How predictable of Nikki Sixx to burn a fucking Bible just to piss off a christian who's had said Bible since childhood...but it somehow shocks me that he'd do it to me, I guess.

I glance down at my wedding ring.

I've noticed it feels more and more like a weight with every argument he and I have.

Our entire relationship was just an open body of water that, that freaking ring was dragging me deeper and deeper in to.

The pressure was starting to get painful and I needed air.

My finger tips tug at my wedding ring and I leave it on the kitchen counter before I'm walking to our bedroom-- while he's still in the living room-- locking the door and heading to the closet, quickly gathering every lick of heroin, coke, and pills before going to our bathroom and flushing all of it, all the while Nikki's banging his fist against our bedroom door.

I hear a loud crash, and realize he kicked the door in.

"Vivian!" He screams as I'm giving the final flush to the last bindle, opening the bathroom door.

He's pushing me aside rather roughly and stomping to the toilet as the sound of the tank refilling with water let's him know what I've been doing.

"What did you do?!" He seethes at me, finger in my face, eyes shot, five o'clock shadow framing his gritted teeth.

And I just turn around with the intention of getting my shoes back on and leaving.

His hand is catching in my hair and yanking me back to him.

"Nikki, fuck off!"

"Don't fucking walk away from me!" He yells.

"I should have walked away from you six years ago!" I exclaim, tears of anger rolling down my cheeks.

This gets his attention because he's letting me go, an obvious expression of hurt on his face.

"I should have never slept with you. I should have never dated you. I should have never told you I'd marry you and I never should have taken vows to love and honor and protect someone who can't even get off of drugs long enough to love and honor and protect me." I sniffle and he blinks at me slowly as if holding back on his emotions.

"Then walk the fuck away." He hisses at me, rolling his jaw.

I left.

Nikki called Vanity.

And I went to find Duff.

I shut my car door before making my way into the Seventh Veil, running a hand through my hair as music blares through the speakers.

I glance around, hoping they're here because I've been up and down the strip and they've been nowhere to be found.

My prayers are answered when I look to see the massive fluff of blonde hair and I walk over to the table where Duff, Izzy, Steven, and Slash are, yanking a chair from a neighboring table and sitting with them.

They give me weird looks, Steven glancing around to check for Nikki or any of the other guys, before exchanging looks with Duff and Slash while Izzy seems unphased, his eyes on the same thing mine are on: the dancer on stage.

"Um...Viv?" Steven asks me cautiously and I side eye him.

"Yeah." I mumble.

"Uh, a-are you here alone?" He asks.

"Yep."

"Do you like strippers or something?" Slash asks me next.

"Nope."

"Did Nikki piss you off?" Duff's next.

"Yep."

"Is your hand alright?" Steven motion's to my hand that's got a scabbed over, bloody cut over the top of it.

"Shh, guys, she has to keep a clear mind so she can properly construct her plan to ask the dancers if they've accepted Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior." Izzy sarcastically puts in and I cut my eyes at him as he takes another drag of his cigarette.

"Talk all your shit, Stradlin. Just gives me more motivation to curate ideas to make your life harder."

"Your existence in itself makes my life harder." He scoffs.

"Good that means I'm fulfilling one of the purposes God gave me for my life."

"Is your other purpose getting your husband so heated he throws you out of the house?"

"Oh, I'm sorry." I pretend to feel sorry, poking my lip out a little. "I forget I can't be upset with Nikki around you because you get bothered at the thought of anyone being upset with your gothic, heroin hounding, drug buddy because you're kindred spirits that have bonded over being tortured artists."

"Oh, go read your Bible." He tells me.

"Can't. Nikki set it on fire." I shoot back and Duff chokes on his drink.

"He what?" Duff asks me, like he's trying to contain a little anger over it.

"So we can expect the Sixxes to get a divorce?" Izzy asks me, clearly joking, and I shake my head.

"No, he's just being a junked-out prick." I mumble, crossing my arms.

"Do you wanna get your anger out by aggressively throwing our money?" Steven asks and I blink.

"I'll go politely put the money on the edge of the stage." I say and Duff finishes his drink, setting the glass face down.

"Alright, let's get outta here." He tells me with a sigh, standing up. "We'll see you guys later."

"Alright, man." Izzy nods. "Viv." He adds.

"Izzy." I reply.

"Bye, Viv." Steven and Slash both say and I smile a little.

"Bye, guys."

I follow Duff out of the club, and he nearly trips coming out, causing me to grab at his hand and arm to try to help him keep balanced, and a few flashes go off, signaling paparazzi and I audibly groan as they move in.

My hand shields my eyes as my other hand holds tightly to Duff's arm as asinine questions are thrown at me but I ignore them.

The bastards got a good enough shot at just the right second--with me holding onto Duff with both of my hands, the two of us sharing wide smiles because we were laughing over him nearly tripping to the ground--that it definitely came across as "a picture's worth a thousand words" but the only words told by that picture was that we were a little more than friends...and that's what the headline spun it up as by the time it landed in Nikki's hands.

The argument it led to sparked the birth of "You're All I Need", delivered by the vocals of Vince, from the demented mind of Sikki Nixx himself.

"Where'd you park?" Duff asks me in my ear over the sound of photography and strangers talking at us, and I tug him into direction of my car that's parked down the street against the curb.

"Welp that's something I'm gonna get to explain to Nikki." I state as soon as we get into my car.

"He knows nothing's happening." He replies, laughing it off.

"Yeah, right." I say under my breath, as I start heading down the road. "Where to?" I ask, stopping at a stop light.

"Oh, I don't know I was just trying to keep you from swinging on Izzy." He admits with a chuckle and I shake my head a little.

"I'd never hit Izzy. Axl, definitely, Izzy, no. He's my favorite."

"Izzy's your favorite? How'd that happen? You two are, like, polar opposites." He asks me with an amused smile.

"He agrees that Sid probably killed Nancy." I inform him and he throws his head back and let's out a frustrated, but humorous, groan.

After finally deciding to just get milk-shakes, we sit in a corner booth of Denny's and once we get out orders, Duff's clearing his throat.

"So, I saw you guys at the show earlier."

He tells me and I raise my brows, sipping at my strawberry milkshake. "You didn't tell us you were coming, we could've told them to take you guys backstage."

"We weren't able to stay very long afterwards...Nikki just wanted to see you guys play together live." I explain.

"Oh." He nods, before asking the dreaded question: "what did he think?"

"He digs you guys." I lie, giving a little smile.

The guys never knew Nikki was approached to produce the album, each of them found out later.

I think they're secretly glad he never touched "Appetite for Destruction."

That album would have been an absolute train wreck under his junkie guidance, just like everything else that Nikki seemed to be apart of in 1987.