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when i made this account i decided i wasn't going to allow negativity on my page in any form, regardless of what shape it took.
i've now decided to amend that for one reason and one reason only.
making fun of my moots, or even just other sturniolo writers on tumblr, is pretty shitty behavior, ngl.
context:
imagine having nothing better to talk about, so you feel the need to go to a brand new app (as if tiktok, instagram, youtube, snapchat, and reddit aren't enough), look up triplet content, and grasp your pearls in horror because we have the audacity to write about chris selling drugs (oh the humanity, someone kill me now).
or, rather, let me use your words: "like, the reader was dating one of them [the triplets] and they all had covid, so she came over and made them all soup-"
leave us alone 🥰
"ok but like what happened to just like normal boyfriend, like why are they all drug dealers-" omg girlie lemme show u how much sweet fluff fanfiction we have on here! oh, what's that? ur not interested? ohhhh is that bc it won't make good content for your knockoff podcast? weird.
"it's always such a 180 from their real personality, like what do you mean, you watch them all the time and you don't know them?" omg girlie! it's almost like it's called fanfiction for a reason!
"lemme write this shit!" go ahead, you'll probably like it, just like the rest of us! writing about the triplets is really fun, and having your moots reblog and comment and like your shit is so super cool. this is a more supposrtive community within the fandom than any i've found on any of the other platforms, and we got that way because we don't judge each other!
i need to go lay down jesus christ
#but bambi#you're hiding behind a faceless account#yes i am!#because often#the sturniolo triplet fandom is toxic as hell#and will not have your back#not my moots tho#u are all so sexy#literally no one asked me to speak on this#however i am Upset#sturniolo triplets#bambi rants#bambi slxt#bambi yaps#my eye is twitching i'm so mad#ughhhh#i also wanna point out#that like#have you been on ao3#do you know the kind of things#that exist about real people#on the internet#the entire after series#sex scenes and all#was based on a wattpad about harry styles#literally go climb a tree and give the triplets dicks a break
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Alright, let's talk about Colin's entrapment line and why Penelope offering an annulment was significant, shall we? Arguably the most controversial part of this season, isn't it?
I'm not going to delve too long on the entrapment line again actually, but to summarise, Colin has been traumatised by a similar situation before, and right now, he's hurt. And the thing about being angry with your best friend is that you know what to say to hurt them the most. We see it in Eloise's and Penelope's fight, as they threw each other's insecurities in the other's faces. Colin, two episodes ago, was defending Penelope against Portia, who was accusing her of entrapping him, so yes, his mind will jump to that first. But also note that the whole time he refuses to look at her, because he knows his words are cutting and will hurt and he knows his resolve would break if he looked at her, which is contrasted by Penelope directly looking at him to tell him she loves him and did not mean for this to happen like this. He does not look because he knows she loves him, this is not Marina's situation exactly who only wanted a way out and did not see him as much else than a means to an end, and that's why it's so much more difficult to deal with for him. Penelope loves him.
And he's already almost lost her once, as angry and hurt as he is, he cannot fathom the idea of letting her go, when he remembers how empty he felt without her letters, or at the idea of her with Debling. So he's still here, determined to marry her.
So now we get to e8. The marriage was not technically consummated, and the Lady Whistledown business is finally settled. So Penelope offers the annulment, to set him, and his family, free from her mess.
They never directly address Colin's entrapment comment again, but with Penelope offering the annulment, it is now implied she's been thinking about this the whole time. It is a very real possibility that by that point, Penelope already knew she was pregnant, and it's been speculated if she told Colin in that scene after Francesca's wedding or not (I personally don't think she did, to not add to his guilt at that moment, and perhaps to not influence his decision, knowing she would be offering the annulment soon) and it parallels Marina's situation again, except in this case, Penelope does not wish to trap Colin with a baby, even if it is his. She knows how much Marina impacted Colin, and does not wish to do the same thing she had prevented Marina to do. The best part about this though? Colin is stunned (Edit: I changed the adjective here as someone rightfully pointed out I was exaggerating by saying "flabbergasted" when his reaction is more on the subtle side the English language is the bane of my existence). Frankly, he probably forgot he even said that, the same way he forgot about his "I would never dream of courting Penelope Featherington" comment - those were words said in the heat of the moment he never actually believed. Not once has Colin thought of either breaking the engagement, or get an annulment even after the betrayal.
He could have still eloped with Marina even after learning the truth, but he didn't because she was not honest with him from the start. He learns Penelope has been living a double life this whole time, and yet he stays.
It is significant that Penelope listened and acknowledged Colin's point of view, the same way she asked him to simply stand by her side and support her. Also note that she never says "our family", she says "you or your family".
Despite already being married, this whole time, it did not feel like they were, and she knew that as long as there was still this barrier between them, she could never truly be part of that family, but it's alright, she could live with that, she has mended things with her own after all, and she can support herself. Whatever the outcome, she'll be alright, she believes.
Fortunately for her, she does not get to find out what that future would entail because Colin absolutely hates the idea of letting her go.
Because after all, she's a mess, but she's his mess.
#bridgerton#bridgerton spoilers#bridgerton thoughts#colin bridgerton#penelope featherington#polin#star.txt#you know i'll defend colin on this site to the ends of the earth#however i am still upset he never did apologise for that#i appreciate he went straight for the love confession though!
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how do you think armand will react to the realization that his godhusbandfather marius is still alive and presumably never bothered to seek armand out in about 500 years?
In my opinion, this is the greatest betrayal of Armand’s life. The abuse was one thing, the trafficking another, but not seeking him out trumps it all. Fundamentally, I think Armand sees love as a contract between two people. You tolerate pain, you even learn to love pain, you learn to love whatever they tell you to love and you love to surrender, and that’s love. In return for that, they choose you. Maybe they also treat you with kindness, or provide you for materially, or stroke your hair gently and hold you, but fundamentally, it’s about being chosen. It’s about sacrificing all these parts of yourself as duty and love and devotion and accepting abuse and mistreatment as self-sacrifice service as the price for devotion from someone else. It’s all “I do this for you, I let you do this to me, and in return, you have to love me.” In Armand’s mind, Marius owes to him to love him. Marius put him through so much. He saved him, he abused him, he turned him. Armand has tolerated? accepted? all of it. And Marius still didn’t go back for him? It’s salt in the wound. How could Marius let him go so easily? How could Marius not love him? How could Marius do all those things and still not love him? How could he do all those things and still not choose him? I don’t really think Armand is psychologically capable of differentiating between love and abuse, because the person he uses as his model of love abused him. Possession, control, punishment, violation, abuse, it’s all part of the shape love takes to him. If someone didn’t love you they wouldn’t bother to cage or hurt you; they’d simply let you go or kill you. You wouldn’t be worth the time or effort to torture or punish or abuse. The love is in the attention, even if it hurts. So Marius not going to look for him is the worst possible betrayal. It’s not love, it’s not abuse, it’s not even hate, it’s indifference. It’s nothing. It would be really painful for him, pain on a level he’s very rarely experienced, despite how much he’s been through.
I think he’d try to rationalize it first. Maybe Marius lost his memory, maybe he was prevented from looking for Armand somehow, maybe he was weakened. Maybe he didn’t look because he thought Armand was better off without him, maybe it was a twisted act of kindness, maybe he was setting him free? No, that can’t be true, because if Marius fucking loved him he would’ve stopped at nothing to retrieve him. He would’ve tried, at least. He would’ve tried. Then it moves to heartbreak, deep, stabbing pain, disappointment and grief and betrayal and hurt and how could you? How could you not? How could you let me go so easily? How could you not love me? How could I mean nothing to you? Then it turns into icy, apocalyptic anger. If Marius doesn’t want him, Marius doesn’t want him. He’ll never see Marius again. Marius is nothing. If it’s done it’s done. This is the end. It’d be a little like that moment of disappointing, crushing clarity all children experience when they realize their parents are pathetic and fallible and not all-knowing or all-forgiving gods. Only broken people who can’t even practice what they preach. It would turn glacial. He’d miss Marius more than life itself, and he always has and I suppose he always will, but that feeling will never again resurface. It’ll be there, somewhere, inside, in private moments, in negative space, but he won’t show it ever again. He’ll be cordial. He’ll be civil. This is his maker. It’s nice to see him. Sure. It’s nice. How’s the weather?
It’s one thing to leave, and another thing entirely to not come back. If he found out firsthand it might actually be possible to see his sanity split like the sky during a thunderstorm as it gets ripped up by lightning. I don’t think he’d react violently. It’d be quiet and terrifying. So much underneath the surface, so much he’s holding back, so much he’s struggling to understand. If he found out firsthand and in private (as in, alone with Marius) I think he’d let Marius explain. He’d still feel all the conflict, but I think he’d look at Marius and wait. Wait for the explanation that’s going to make all of this understandable. Wait for the explanation that’s going to make things go back to how they were. Wait for the explanation that’s going to make him sure Marius loves him. Wait for safety, the comfort, the familiarity. Wait for something that’ll never come and will only ever be a hollow imitation and insult to the real thing that died 5 centuries ago.
#iwtv#interview with the vampire#armand#i really enjoyed answering this#however if i am wrong i will be more upset than i have described armand to be here
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shadow of the erdtree lore and characterization is so fucking good when u dont have someone in ur ear saying it sucks
#txt#understandable that it still may not be to ppl's tastes and/or they#are unable to quite grasp the exact angles you DO have to dig for#however. i am having a ball in this bitch#i remember what it was like to be so upset but now that ive put in the work to ask Why and How in good faith its like WOOHOOOOO#fromsoft has never let me down yet!!!!
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I think it’s okay if Hugh and Mads don’t like the fandom. I think this year has seen the most “new” Hannibal content in ages and they were excited at first but because the fandom is so old and experiencing a new boom of popularity that it has created a new beast. When the show was airing the fandom was still as unhinged online as it is now but irl it wasn’t nearly as large at panels. Now the online behaviour is leaking into real life interactions with fans, crowds are bigger and they are uncomfortable by it. I think that Hugh has always been uncomfortable with the lengths people pushed Hannigram (as in literally making them gay and not just have a weird tension filled slightly romantic bromance) and I think Mads just doesn’t have the patience for it anymore and neither of them owe us their comfort. I do blame the fans because I refuse to get angry and waste my energy being angry at these two men for not liking their own fandom. It’s happened before and it will happen again, fans are not always chill or normal (I say this as a fan! Hugh’s face is literally my pfp! I’m parasocial asf!)
Hopefully if they really don’t like the panel experience of this year that they stop attending them because I feel the resentment will only get worse and it will make the fandom more toxic. It’s our job as fans to check ourselves and be aware of our more toxic tendencies.
To conclude, it’s okay to separate the art from the actors. They are only a piece of a much larger picture!
#this is NOT a hate post#I genuinely like this fandom and my experience has been really fun#it’s okay to be upset!!!#I am not blind however#I AM CALLING US OUT#all of us are responsible for how we act online and irl#we should be respectful#I don’t think they owe us anything#if these panels have put you off that’s okay too#you don’t owe either of them your time OR MONEY#we all love the show but it is separate from Hugh and Mads#hannibal#hugh dancy#mads mikkelsen
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Twin skeletons need twin carriers (Patreon)
#Doodles#UT#Handplates#Gaster#Sans#Papyrus#Asgore#Also hey Edgar is here! What the heck! Lol#Vargas#Edgar#Ugh I am so weak to baby silliness jfdslafjdjsahfds#I quite literally asked for it and it was still an OHKO lol ♪#Just! The idea of Gaster getting a baby carrier was too cute not to explore heck and a heck#He'd need a twin carrier! :D Or one of those ones that can attach one to another criss-cross style however it works - he'd need two#But the classic twin setup would have some interesting logistical problems haha#For one Sans is very upset at being separated from his brother especially - Papyrus would also fuss but Sans is much louder ironically haha#There are carrier styles that allow both babies to sit sideways so they can see each other tho :D A decent solution#Also me realizing in real time just how old Gaster is to be a single father all of a sudden lol#There'd still probably be situations where he'd need to be a bit more balanced I imagine that'd get fairly front-heavy#Even if they are skeletons so is he haha#The other problem would be - I imagine Sans would basically always take Gaster's chest and Papyrus at his back#Even tho he sleeps more - maybe even partially because of that - Gaster would always want to be able to check on him#He's quieter and moves around less and if he Needs-to needs-to he can protect Sans with his arms#Hopefully that would never need to happen! But Parent Brain haha#He accidentally bonks Papyrus into something and goes into near-hysterics of What If That Was Sans I Can Never Set This Baby Down Again#I have another small silly idea related to that as well hopefully I can get to it soon haha#Anyway - obviously he trusts Asgore with Sans! Happy medium!#Papyrus finally getting some chest-to-chest snuggles hehe ♪ Gaster isn't baby talking him he's just being dryly silly haha#The translations are ''NOW NOW'' ''ISN'T THAT QUITE ENOUGH'' ''DON'T YOU KNOW BETTER''#Asgore just enjoying watching him talk to the boys in his own font - privately but openly bonding with them! ♥ A thing only skeletons can do
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just saw a video on twitter of someone taking their csm manga off of their shelf and putting them in a trashbin because the latest chapter of said story contains a scene of sa. in a story thats largely about abuse and intimacy and has tackled said topic before too. whatever. but then they replaced it with a fucking jojo book so i started laughing
#I CHOOSE TO BELIEVE ITS A BIT. IN WHICH CASE ITS FUNNY.#like yeah man i hate it when sa of minors is portraid in stories. anyway i love jojos bizarre adventure#am i as a victim myself upset that the mere addition of the topic of sa into stories has people going crazyy#even when its invoked to explore the effects it has on victims? yes….. however i understand how its a topic that will upset people ofc. but#the whiplash however is crazy like BROTHER YOURE NOT GONNA BELIEVE WHAT I HAVE TO SAY ABOUT HOW JOJO WRITES SA IN CONTRAST TO CSM
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I love when I just jump on Tumblr and just see everyone fighting over who should win the polls.
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absolutely devastated because i was rooting for checo so hard this weekend. he did so well...
#i'm not completely crushed because i adore charles and oscar and george too but man i am so sad about checo#gonna hop off tumblr to process my emotion cause i'm too upset rn#however charles and oscar was absolutely amazing today and i am happy for them#sergio perez#2024/azerbaijan gp#formula 1#*ensiyap
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... what kind of ignoramus designed the EA app. Was this designed by a committee of corporate twits with too many business degrees and a complete dearth of common sense? Having to GO ONLINE to enable OFFLINE MODE is the stupidest fucking thing I have ever heard of in my life. Do you know when I need offline mode? Do you, incomprehensible moron from planet idiot who designed this feature? WHEN I DO NOT HAVE GODDAMN INTERNET ACCESS.
In conclusion I hope the fuckwit(s) responsible for this step on a lego and fall down a (short) flight of stairs in front of three people they respect and acquire a RAFT of bruises to both their bodies and egos both, amen.
#like my internet came back in short order but oh my fucking god#this is among the stupidest and most user-unfriendly features I have yet encountered#just. how are people this stupid.#steam will try to boot in online mode and then automatically go into offline mode. that makes sense.#because it is a store yes but it is also HOW I ACCESS A GAME LIBRARY and it is AWARE of that secondary purpose#and so when one aspect of it wont' work it's like 'hey that's offline but here's your games'#it's fascinating how reading Scum Villain and falling in love with SQQ made me feel entirely free to be an angry bitch sometimes#I'm just like 'I know he displays angry internet troll tendencies maybe twice in the series while talking to another transmigrator'#'however; I love him regardless and he's fictional so people who really love me will not be upset if I rant occasionally'#I'm sure in desperation I could go find where the games are actually installed and launch them from there#but this is still SO STUPID I am somewhat aghast the people responsible are employed#there are so many people on this earth with sense#and somehow whoever inflicted this on the world has a job
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anger issues perhaps
#my art#original#vent#//therapy? never heard of her#//makes ya think that this really isnt about just driving really#//the fact that i feel embarrassed about posting this one goes to show how deeply unwell i am#//reblogs turned off for obvious reasons#//no i dont actually swerve the car when upset; it is however one of the many intrusive thoughts that i have while driving#//*grits my teeth until they crack* i love driving
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you'll be pleased to know that on my first day back at my job after my two week vacation i am already in one of my semi-regular Job Crises where i feel like if i dont find a new, better job soon im going to explode into 5 billion pieces
#in case you were wondering if i was handling it well#considering getting some sort of degree . but i cant afford that!!!!!!!!!#but i may need one. if i want a better job........#this is so evil. where are the jobs where you can just do fuck all#in all seriousness back to the degree thing im considering getting a degree in library sciences but i dont even have a bachelors 💀#i was too broke for college! had to work! still have to work! no time or money to go to college then or now!#my crisis aside its extremely funny to me how im not even through my first day back and im like oh lol right i hate every minute of this 👍#also im trying not to have Severe guilt abt the ticket(s) i bought the other day like some crazy person but thats another story#yes ill make the money back yes ill enjoy the show but the Guilt..........#which was entirely because my dad was like >:( when i told him i got a ticket for a Far Lesser amount#and im just hoping he doesnt notice how much my bank account has gone down. oops#but that aside and back to my job crisis:#i cant stand it here!!!!!! i really do hate it!!! and i need a new job. however? everything abt the job process is awful and against me#i was planning on writing an article when i got back from vacation but you guessed it im now too stressed/upset to be creative#which is hampering any possibility of my creative aspirations becoming some sort of career#im so tired. already right back to where i was before my vacation when i really needed a vacation#:( . like ill be fine lol i just. am going through it and these tags have gone on too long#but i think i really will get worse if i stay here for longer and its not even that bad but by god sometimes it is#anyway . im taking it well
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What does it mean to you to have a guy like Ja'Marr willing to say 'maybe you should sit out' but then once you get on the field be fully committed to doing whatever it takes to get open?
Coming into this game I was gonna feed my guy. He was due for one, I knew he was gonna have a big game. Just the way he was talking all week, he was excited to play this one. He showed up big for us, showed why he's one of the best.
#finally reporters asking the important questions!!!#why does it mean to have someone like ja'marr on the team???#someone you've known for years who can and will challenge you when he disagrees with what you're doing!!#but is still willing to support and help you no matter what!!#and then the way joe just stops himself from saying he was planning on this for ja'marr#he knew ja'marr was upset#and he was going to remedy that however he could#the partnership the support the trust of it all!!!!!#i meant to post this earlier but finally i am free i have had people at my house for the last week and a half#go away loved ones i have to bengals post#joe burrow#ja'marr chase
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failed my geometry test ok. does anyone know a good place in the forest for me to live
#.txt#i’m not going to have a melt down over this. i gotta lock in and draw#however i am upset. because my grade just keeps going down. and down. and down#this is the only class i genuinely need to pass im done with everything else#i am normal i’m normal im chill i gotta lock in
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you know despite what my posting would suggest im actually very interpersonally functional
#we're going to erev rosh hashanah together. it's not super long and i want moral support for the first time i go to a new temple anyway#and then whatever subset of kol nidre and yk i can like. personally endure without getting upset#so that's all fine#box opener#usually i just do all this verbally over about ten minutes make a decision and then never think about it again#however sometimes i am not in a position to get immediate interlocutor feedback#and that's when i start blogging.
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kind of slowly returning to tumblr here and there since im not sure the break did anything mindblowing. will say work has gotten Interesting and i am making the devastating realization i have to start going to bed before midnight or i am going to be too exhausted to think in a few weeks
#working a 9-5 right now its gonna be a fun time when classes start and im working on stuff from 9a-10p#im cool with the work though the current plan involves slamming out 1-2 primary authored papers in my first quarter which is so fun a flex#im willing to suffer for it lol#i am however greatly upset i need to give myself a bedtime in order to manage my health and not die badly in that first quarter
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