#i also had an eye infection that week terrible fucking luck my god

[dwtdog]

most spaces/drodcasts would be like morning/afternoon for me although some did happen like ealry evening ithink

the bath space happened at like three am on the morning of my highschool graduation i thought it was a fever dream 😭

[whumpmatsus]

Do they have to be whump related? Also Ichimatsu getting a shot pls

wasn't sure if you wanted a draw or a fic, so I did both!

and yeah, any draw or fic requests you send here should probably be whump-related since this is a whump-focused blog

though if you wanna send any draw or fic/scenario/reaction/etc. requests that AREN'T whump, you can send them to my general Osomatsu-san blog at @kisskissmatsu!

enjoooooy <3

-

-

Usually Ichimatsu is the sextuplet who’s fine being left all by himself.

Being in the hospital without his family, though, is a much different story.

It started innocently enough ― with a persistent cough that was almost certainly the herald of a cold or sore throat on the horizon. As much as he hates being sick, he sort of resigned himself to it. He’s the one among his brothers who’s forever catching what happens to be going around, despite the fact that he doesn’t spend a lot of time around other people. That’s why he started wearing a face mask when he does leave the house.

It was about a week or so of sneezing, coughing, and sniffling his way through various attempts to rest. His throat felt worse than it usually did with a cold, and even more alarming was that his chest felt like it was on fire, especially when he started coughing. Even though he started having trouble breathing, he thought maybe this was just something that would linger for a bit, something that needed more sleep to recover from.

When things didn’t taper off after that, since a week was typically all it took for him to start feeling better, the others started commenting on it.

When Ichimatsu started to spend more time in the bathroom with a sink full of hot water in the hopes that the steam would help him breathe easier, and it didn’t seem to be having any effect, they all got worried.

When Karamatsu blurted out, “I secretly took Ichimatsu’s temperature with a forehead thermometer while he was sleeping and it read 39.4!”, Mom and Dad immediately carted their fourth son off to the hospital.

It figures Shittymatsu would get him into this mess, but Ichimatsu supposes that the sneaky gesture was only out of care, otherwise Karamatsu wouldn’t have spoken up about a number that concerned him.

That doesn’t mean he has to like it. After a distressing, panic-inducing few hours of waiting and a date with the X-ray machine, the doctor diagnosed him with bacterial pneumonia. That particular diagnosis ensured that he had to be admitted into the hospital under quarantine, because as the doctor explained, bacterial pneumonia is extremely contagious and potentially life-threatening, particularly to someone with a fragile immune system like Ichimatsu. They can’t send him home to infect his brothers or the rest of the community, and even though he isn’t technically immuno-compromised, his tendency to get sick easily means that it’s better for him to be here in the hospital in case things suddenly take a bad turn.

Being in here is like he’s trapped in hell and can’t get out. Because he’s in quarantine, he never sees anybody. Which would be fine normally. Feeling so poorly is a significant reason for wanting his family nearby, though… and he can’t have them.

The most they can do is visit outside his room and talk to him through the speaker system. That’s even worse, seeing them all and not being able to have any real contact with him. Right now more than anything, what he wants is a hug from his mom. God, he wants a hug from his brothers.

It’s hard to even get any rest like he’s supposed to be doing. Most of his time is spent sitting up, trying to get a sufficient breath in while he listens to various TV channels. The idol news reminds him of Choromatsu, sports statistics remind him of Jyushimatsu, game shows remind him of Osomatsu, American dramas remind him of Karamatsu, and fashion shows remind him of Totty.

Those are just distractions, because it’s still hard to breathe. He’s struggling for most of his breaths, but too deep a breath will trigger a coughing fit. Which, in turn, makes it more difficult to breathe.

It’s barely been a day since he was admitted and already he wants out of here.

His brothers visit sometime after lunch, and they spend a few hours. Eventually the nurse gently chases them out, telling them that Ichimatsu needs to try to get some rest. Shortly after that she comes into the room, rolling her little cart with the tray on it.

“How do you feel today, Ichimatsu?” she hums, pulling on a pair of gloves. “Any better than when we admitted you?”

He shakes his head and tries to answer when another series of coughs interrupts him. Although it’s hard to cover his mouth when his whole body is aching, he does his best. After all, he doesn’t want to get anyone else sick. He’s already in quarantine, so all the doctors and nurses are taking their own precautions; still, he shouldn’t just give up and spread his germs carelessly. “N-not really.”

She nods and picks up a wrapped packet from the tray. “Well, to be honest, that’s understandable. It hasn’t been very long.” The packet is ripped open, and the distinct smell of alcohol fills the air as she carefully pushes his sleeve up. “The lack of improvement does concern us, though. So I just have to give you an injection of some medicine, okay?”

Shit. He thought that might be what was going on here. He knows he’s too exhausted to fight it, and yet, his brain evidently isn’t too exhausted to not be fucking anxious about it. “I… I have to get a shot?”

The cold wipe is rubbed against the top part of his arm. “Yeahhh… I’m sorry. This is penicillin, and it’s one of our standard treatments for pneumonia. The doctor thinks you’ll have better luck sitting still for one shot than for a whole pill-and-water deal, since you’re coughing a lot. I kind of have to agree, since you might accidentally inhale some water if you cough while trying to take the pills.”

Immediately he starts to panic. Most of the time the idea of a shot doesn’t bother him more than it might the average person ― he gets the yearly flu vaccine without any problems. Right now, however… the idea of a shot while he’s already feeling so terrible, the initial pinch and the ache that might happen afterwards and being alone, it just feels scary.

The nurse must hear the way his breathing starts to quicken, or maybe the way his hands start shaking. She gives his shoulder a little pat. “Ah, I know on your chart it says you suffer from some anxiety. Are you a bit anxious right now?”

“Y… yeah…”

“Okay. That’s totally fine, you know? Different people get anxious about different things. Would it help if I distracted you, or if I gave you a countdown so you know when it’s coming? Sometimes that helps so it’s not a surprise… or, sometimes people prefer it to be a surprise. Which one do you think would be best for you?”

… Oh. He wasn’t expecting something like that. It almost feels like he has a little control over this, despite the fact that he has to get the injection either way. “C… can you… count down?”

“Sure, of course. No problem.” Then she reaches over with one hand, grabbing the syringe with the other. “Would you like to hold my hand?”

That’s kind of… babyish, isn’t it? “I-I’m not a kid… I don’t wanna…”

She chuckles. “Well, you know, earlier today I held the hand of an elderly lady who was getting a shot. It’s not just a kid thing. But if you don’t want to, that’s fine too.”

He takes a moment to consider that, then silently slips his hand into hers.

“Alright, just squeeze if you feel like you need to. I’m all set, are you?”

“I… I think so…”

“Okay, I’m gonna give you the countdown then. Here we go. Three ― two ― one.”

As soon as she says the last number, he feels the needle pierce his skin. It’s uncomfortable, a sharp kind of pinprick pain. There’s a slight feeling of tightness and soreness as the medicine is emptied into his muscle, and a brief jolt when the nurse pulls the needle out.

All in all, even though it isn’t a pleasant experience, it’s not as bad as it could have been. It’s certainly better than choking on a pill and a glass of water if he had to try to swallow the medication.

And, at least, it’s over now.

“There. You did great, Ichimatsu. Probably my best patient of the day!” With that, she sets the syringe back down on the tray and gingerly smooths a bandage with a cotton ball over the injection site. “That should keep you clean just in case any blood trickles out from the shot, and someone will come take it off later if the adhesive starts to make your skin itch.”

He nods and coughs into his arm again, giving a soft groan. He’s just so tired, from the fever, from the coughing, from not being home. “Is it gonna m… khh… make me tired?”

“Haha, it shouldn’t, no. You might feel a little nauseous, or you might have to go to the bathroom more, or you might get a small itchy rash… just press the call button if any of that happens or if you feel strange otherwise, okay?” Her cart is all packed up already, and she’s heading out of the room. “If you get tired, it’s probably because you’re sick and need rest. So, try to sleep as much as you can.”

“’Kay.” He just feels like this illness has drained everything out of him, and there’s a little throbbing where he got the injection. But, the more he sleeps, hopefully the sooner he can recover and go home.

On her way out, the nurse dims the lights. Practically as soon as she does, Ichimatsu’s eyes start to drift closed. God, he’s so tired.

He lies down, though the bed is still a little elevated since sleeping flat will just make him cough more. Sleep tugs at him, and he has to move a little bit so he’s not putting any pressure on the area where he got the shot.

Soon. Soon he can go home.

Just as soon as he gets better.

[fluorescentpipedream]

“Hey, Bill.”

Adam looked up from his place at the bar And slid off the stool as Bill came walking in. It had been a little over six months since he’d seen the other man and as he got closer, the two embraced before Bill leaned back and looked Adam over.  “Six months and I get a half-hearted hug and a hi.  What’s wrong, don’t like me anymore?”

Adam sighs softly, running a hand through his fauxhawk and sits back down on the bar stool he’d been at originally. Bill follows suit and nods his head to the bartender, ordering something called a dark and stormy, only to be met with a confused look. He sighs “Ginger beer and dark rum...”

“That sounds awful” Adam takes a slow drink from his jack and coke before finally turning to his friend again. Bill looks pretty good for a man that was supposed to be dead three years ago. He’s always had a wiry frame but generally stands about 6′3. He’s wearing a dress shirt and black jeans, though the shirt is wrinkled a bit, likely a good sign this is the second or third time it’s been worn this week. That was always a bad habit with him. Still, he seems to have put on a bit more muscle in the time he’s been gone. “You’re staring, Adam”

‘Sorry, it’s just been a long day. And I’m stuck wondering how many days that shirt has seen and how the hell you made time to work out while you were on a book tour”

“Only today, it’s been wrinkled since I put it on. It’s my favorite one...and I didn’t really, though St. Louis has some pretty nice climbing walls.” The bartender brings his drink, which he tastes and grimaces. “dammit all, one of these days I’ll find someone to make one of these correctly.” After taking the twist of line off the glass and biting into it, he orders something else. “How’s New Beginnings?”

“Tracy is still in our meetings…and I’ve got a new one that’s just breaking my heart.”

“Christ, hasn’t she milked this for as much as she can? She’s not even the one that’s actually infected…it was her brother…lover? Both?” Bill pauses as the bartender comes back over with a new drink for him, he nods to the man but doesn’t reach for it right away. 

Adam laughs softly. “ husband was the one infected, her brother is a heroin addict.” “I could never keep it straight, she was always complaining about something and seemed to think I was in the wrong for saying fuck it to all of the whining and waiting around to die... Who’s breaking your heart?” 

“His name is Liam.”

“What’s his story?” “Poor kid has been through hell the last few months….he’s the one from the news…at the fraternity…” When Bill shrugs, Adam frowns and proceeds to tell him about the issues at UCLA, and one of their more notorious fraternities. They still practiced hazing, while swearing they didn’t, and Liam had gotten some of the worst of it. As Bill curses, Adam nods in agreement and continues on, telling him how Liam was diagnosed with HIV, bordering on full blown AIDs due to his ravaged immune system, though it was unrelated to the hazing incident. Adam frowned and took another drink. 

“So how long has it been since he was diagnosed?”

“About three weeks, maybe four. But he actually contracted it when he was 16. Apparently, his guidance counselor tried to guide him in another way.”   Adam snarled and Bill muttered a few curses under his breath, a few of which weren’t even in a English. Dropping his head forward, he rolls his neck to the right which causes his blond hair to fall forward and cover the side of his face. Raising his head again, he pushed his hair back into place. Seeing that Adam shared his annoyed and yet equally sympathetic and sad expression, he turned to face him on the stool and laid his hand on Adam’s shoulder. “Is he cute, at least?” Adam chuckled, happy for the change in tone. He nodded. “He’s a little skinny, but his eyes and smile would knock you flat in a heartbeat. Although, I’m pretty sure you aren’t his type…”

“Am I too old?” Bill snickers.

 “Well he is in his 20s...”

“Ahh..yeah...he wants ‘em hot and older but not quite daddy.” Both men laughed. Adam grinned into his glass, holding his hand up but for his third round he just gets a soda. Bill follows suit. 

“So, whatever happened to Jeanie? I know you were dating before you left...”

“Eh…she started acting too much like my nurse. And honestly, I just don’t have the right mindset for women, I never have. I don’t know why I try to convince myself I’m bi, I barely have any female friends!” “You just need to find a man, stop lying to yourself.” “I had one for a while, but he decided he liked girls better.” Bill gives him a playful look that causes his blue eyes to light up.  “Yeah yeah…I was a terrible boyfriend anyway.”

“Given the circumstances, you weren’t the worst. And I don’t blame you for deciding we be friends, rather than lovers.” Bill had been diagnosed when they were dating, it was back in college and they were both scared. Adam had a relatively normal reaction, but they’d made it through well enough. “I needed you, Adam, I never would have gotten clean or made it through that first year without you” He hadn’t cheated on Adam either, he had a bit of a drug problem that had lead to a lifetime of health problems. The silence was growing between them before he cleared his throat and spoke again, chuckling as he did so. 

“Somehow we’re still friends. Isn’t it bad luck to be friends with your ex?”

“Only if you’re straight. Which neither of us is. Not completely, at least.” “You are, more than I am.”

““I’m not the only guy you’ve been with since then, am I?”

“God no! That was 15 years ago! I just haven’t had anything that serious in a while...I need someone as adventurous as I am.” He grins. Bill travels quite a bit, whether he’s learning to be a wildlife photographer or fly fishing in Canada, he’s climbed Mount Everest and is actually planning on taking on Kilimanjaro next year, he wants someone that can do it with him without constantly asking if he’s sure his body can handle the stress. Now that he’s back in San Francisco, he was planning on finding a gym of some sort to start training. Maybe kick boxing could be fun? 

“In any case, my last signing is on Thursday, I could come to the meeting on Wednesday and talk to the kid if you’d like. It might help.” 

“It might. I keep telling him you don’t have to die just because you have this disease, you can still have a long life but he doesn’t seem to want to hear it from someone that doesn’t have it. I tried telling him my ex- has AIDs but I get the feeling he doesn’t believe me.” 

“Remember how many people tried to lie to me, when I was diagnosed? ‘my friend’s second cousin has AIDs...” Bill rolls his eyes as he finishes his drink. “I thought Em was going to clock the last one that tried it. Maybe meeting someone that doesn’t treat it as a curse will help him, though if I’m a guest, does that mean I can’t tell Tracy to shove it?’

“Liam beat you to the punch, though if she starts up again, have at it. I know you never liked her.” It felt like Tracy had been coming to the New Beginnings meetings for as long as Adam had been running them, and the story always got worse every time she spoke. She also seemed to harbor a severe hatred towards Bill and his ‘fuck waiting around to die’ mentality. It would be interesting to see if she still stood up to him now that he’s a NY Times Best Seller and was on Ellen. Adam smiled at the thought though shifted his attention to his phone as it chimes at him. 

Before he can grab it, Bill leans over and snatches it from him. He had thought it was their other friend, Emmett, who’s been working as a nutritionist and usually works in close ties with Adam. If this kid was as bad off as Adam said, he would have likely sent him Em’s way. Usually he avoids going into bars, since he’s struggled with alcoholism since college, so if the three of them get together they tend to avoid it in lieu of his comfort. Seeing the name though, he smirks. 

“Ooh...Who’s Shannon?”

“What are you? 12? Give me that!” Adam tries to snatch his phone back and ends up with Bill’s hand in his chest.

“It’s Liam’s aunt.”

“What are you doing giving your number to strange women?”

“She’s not strange. I gave her my number in case she wanted to talk...”

“Uh-huh. I guess your bedside manner has gotten better.” Bill winks before handing Adam’s phone back to him. For his part, Adam lightly taps Bill on the top of the head with it before reading the message. Apparently Liam had met a couple of college students on the beach the other day and they were “dragging” him bowling tomorrow night. She wanted to have dinner. He and Shannon has been taking it pretty slow. She had a lot on her plate now with her nephew living with her and Liam was still so new to the whole ‘living with his disease’ thing...neither wanted to make Liam less than, especially since there was the abuse and neglect surrounding him before. Adam was staring at his phone, playing out several scenarios in his mind. Bill pushes his hair back from his face again and scratches at his chin before speaking in a more serious tone as he lays his hand on Adam’s shoulder.

“You’re overthinking this, Adam. It’s dinner, not a marriage proposal. Don’t make me answer for you, you know I will.”

“Don’t you dare.” After another pause, he sends his response, telling Shannon he would love to have dinner with her tomorrow, he’ll pick her up at 6. “Looks like I have a date tomorrow.” Adam mused. “Congratulations! We should celebrate,” he laughed, flipping his phone over do the screen was flat on the bar top “Emmett wants to have dinner on Thursday after my signing, you good to go?”  “That should be fine…it’ll be good to get all of us together again. We haven’t had dinner since before you left.” 

“Fuck, that feels like a long time ago.”

Adam nodded “Yeah…“it’s amazing how much can happen in just a few months...”

[comicteaparty]

June 24th-June 30th, 2019 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from June 24th, 2019 to June 30th, 2019.  The chat focused on Drugs & Wires by Mary Safro & Io Black.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Week Long Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Drugs & Wires by Mary Safro & Io Black~! (https://www.drugsandwires.fail/)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Remember, though, that while we allow constructive criticism, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic. Below you will find four questions to get you started on the discussion. However, a new question will be posted and pinned everyday (between 12:01AM and 6AM PDT), so keep checking back for more! You have until June 30th to tell us all your wonderful thoughts! With that established, let’s get going on the reading and the chatting!

QUESTION 1. What has been your favorite scene in the comic so far? What specifically did you like about it?

QUESTION 2. Who do you think made the Worm and for what reason? Why does it seem to mostly be affecting Stradania and not other places? Do you think Dan’s implant can ultimately be fixed, or is he stuck forever away from VR?

RebelVampire

QUESTION 3. At the moment, who is your favorite character? What about that character earns them this favor?

QUESTION 4. What aspect of the world’s cyberpunk setting interests you the most and why? Alternatively, what aspect are you hoping to see explored a bit more in regards to how it affects the characters?

RebelVampire

1) Gonna be a bit depressing when I say the bridge scene where Dan almost threw himself off it. Which I'm gonna spoiler tag the rest of this just as a suicide trigger warning precaution. I was 100% right there in the moment with him during that scene. Like I understood why he'd arrived at that conclusion, and it didn't come off as patronizing as I feel a lot of similar suicide scenes often do in comics. This is a man who even I felt really had nothing to live for, as sad as that is to say. Not that I wanted Dan to die, of course, but I get absolutely why he would. And then when he's saved, I liked that he is angry about it. Cause that is a dark reality I feel too many comics shy away from. And just all that gritty realism really hit me in the heart. 2) I don't know who made the worm and I don't think it matters all that much. Rather, I think the reason is more important, and the reason I think is to either kill VR or draw attention to Dan's shitty country. Which I kind of want to believe the latter, that this is somehow politically motivated. Or even if its the former, the idea is to get ppl more politically involved. That being said, I do think it's someone in Stradania who made it. As for Dan's implant being fixed, I don't think so. I don't think he'll be let off the hook that easy, and that he will continue to have to face his awful world for what it is, garbage and all.

3) Dan because he is the delicious epitome of a flawed protagonist. He's not mean, but between his drug problems, his crappy attitude towards most people, and so forth, he's got some real issues to work through. But that's great, cause at least that makes the few steps forward he's taken more satisfying. Since he's not getting those steps easy. He has to basically crawl through metaphorical lava to gain even 2 cm. 4) I really like the world's integration of VR and cybernetics. Like it's not on the level it's just there, but there's businesses around it, slang around it, and so forth. It's presented as this super ingrained culture thing, and that is super hard to play off. And it's just really well-done to see all the ways that those aspects bleed into their lives, whether the invention was intended to do so in that way or not.

Historical Jesus

I'm about to catch up. gimmy some time

RebelVampire

itll be going for the rest of the week, so theres no rush.

snuffysam

1) My favorite scene is the basement wake. It's a cool way to introduce those side characters (especially Vlad), and we were shown how our protagonist is seen through other people's eyes.

Like, we as the readers get to see Dan's struggles first-hand, but seeing the way Dan's "friends" think of him as a mindless junkie is really eye-opening

Re-reading the wake chapter made me think of something regarding question (2). Rebel, you suggested that the worm may have been made to kill VR. Could the reverse be true instead? Vlad has this speech about how the victims of the worm are martyrs, and the rest of the cast groans... but maybe he's not so far off.(edited)

My favorite character is Lin. On the surface, she's a terrible, shady person, but she's got heart where it counts! (in a trunk with a bunch of other organs)

Though I also really like Dan, for the same reasons as Rebel. He starts off in such a terrible place, and watching him take baby steps towards improvement is... honestly, uplifting, even if he does sometimes take some big steps backward.(edited)

RebelVampire

QUESTION 5. What has been your favorite illustration in the comic so far? What specifically about it do you like?

QUESTION 6. Do you think Dan will manage to find Eve again? If so, how might that affect him? Further, what do you think Dan’s past history is in general with his family and others that might play a role in the story?

Historical Jesus

Is the person writing this comic Russian

RebelVampire

cant speak for Io, but while not from Russia, Mary does speak Russian

Historical Jesus

SHe might have had family immigrate from Russia. This story just feels very Russian in the sense that everyone is down on their luck

But yeah. This story is freaking great!

Cryo

Hey, Mary here! I'm a Russian from Latvia, Io's German but I usually consult him on any Russian bits we have in the comic : D thanks so much for reading, loved seeing all the replies so far!

Historical Jesus

It's you

@Cryo Do you have experience with information security or bug hunting?(edited)

I mean, you sound like you REALLY understand hacker culture(edited)

Historical Jesus

ok I finished

1: Favorite scene? Hard to tell honestly. I like them all for different reasons. It's the continuum of the story I appreciate. The fact I'm always wanting to see what happens next? 2: Who made the worm. I've noticed that people who were infected had illegal copies of software. From a cybersecurity perspective, worms only work when either (A) someone finds a vulnurability that has never before been seem or (B) people don't update their shit for whatever reason. Hence why most software schedules mandatory updates. This could just be the inevitable conclusion to using pirated or older software. 3: Favorite character: Dan. I can relate to him the most. I don't do party drugs, just psycodelics.

4: Favorite aspect of cyberpunk. Historical relevance. In our past, rulers were privileged to rule because humans believed they were "ordained by God" to rule. European philosophers then said that the right to rule belongs to those who become the height of natural selection/ The premise being that there is no god and that we are "free agents" with "free will." No one is entitled to anything unless they produce something of value. This made perfect sense when manual labor was relevant and everything had to be done by hand. This includes pen and paper math. Hence why pay is exclusively based on labor value. Enter the age of technology fucked this up. Capitalism today is STUPIDLY efficient. We WHOOPED natural selections ass. We also learned that humans can't simply "change their outlook at will." Humans are mortal and are not much different than machines. The have needs and all that pesky human stuff. Some people could argue that healthier people have more free will than others, but poverty is the inevitable conclusion to this "free will" "labor value" mindset. But people think principles are sacred and set in stone. So what we are seeing is devalued labor and everyone becoming more poor and the formation of corporate oligarchies and dependences. Cyberpunk was WAY ahead of it's time in seeing this. We need to revisit this genre because I sure as shit don't want to live under a global illuminati with hard line cultural segregation.(edited)

Cryo

No, no real hacking experience here, I'm a 3d modeller by trade. We do our research when we can but our readers are a lot more technically minded than we are :p

Historical Jesus

I love 3D modeling

Attila Polyák

I'll be totally honest your work didn't really catch me at first, but I kept reading. Aaaaand dang that was a good decision. This is genuinely well made. I'm only at the end of chapter 4 but that bridge scene was great. I'm pretty sure it'll be my favourite scene but I need to read the rest first.

Historical Jesus

I have one of two options in life. Make high detailed models to sell on Gumroad or make comics. Gumroad will require constant adaptation to new software, but I already have my comic story structure fgiured out

Cryo

@Attila Polyák thanks for giving us a chance! Hope you enjoy the rest ( though chapter 5 is a lot less dramatic in comparison!)

Historical Jesus

Do you have a resolution in mind or are you just making it as you go?

Cryo

Yeah, we know where we're taking the story, but how it gets there can vary. Lots of the scenes we wrote years ago have to be tweaked or redone entirely to work

Historical Jesus

If the "free will" capitalist have their way, then we can expect the future to look very similar. Lots of poor people using lots of old tech. All software and hardware is closed sourced and locked down.The division between rich and poor will be larger than ever. Many of the zero days will be state sponsored much like they are now and they can use this to legally infect people and categorize them and use their own information against them if they ever become a threat to the state or the rich tech oligarchy

When I read this I got sense of creepy forcasting

More kids are playing with the Linux Kernal than smoking cigarettes so we might be ok

Historical Jesus

5: Favorite illustration? Anything that involved gif animations. That's not to say it should be overused but it was used at the right time

6a: Will Dan find Eve again? Probably. Since Cryo has a conceptual end in mind, I imagine she serves a key purpose in the plot. If they don't then it's likely that their actions will effect each other in some way.(edited)

6b: What is Dan's history with his parents? Let's look at who Dan is now. He's a poor drug addict who has had a dead end job. Yet he is not an overly angry person. Just depressed. He hangs around computer poetry people and other drug people. As a person who has experience with drugs, I noticed three types of people who do the dangerous drugs. At least in the US. They are... -People who have had repressive or needlessly strict parents. Thus overdoing drugs becomes associated with freedom and eventually a point of rebellion. But you can do too many of them. -People who are poor and need to sell them because they are poor. Naturally many of them do the drugs themselves so they naturally become addicted. -People who's parents are drug users themselves. The people who teach are schools will tell you it's that "people are trying to be cool" and it has nothing to do with that. Truth be told, they are hiding something. There is also a lot of dark racial history behind enhancing substances and the law and that can influence people's decision to take them, but I don't want to get into that because I don't want to get booted from this server.(edited)

Historical Jesus

Actually, @Cryo, would you be willing to give us a brief personal biography? Also, if you are, then can you tell us about your parents, what they did for a living, and the income situation you had growing up.(edited)

Why am I asking this? I think we can come up with more interesting answers about the comic if we know YOU as a person and how that influences your writing. I was able to infer that this story sounded Russian as fuck. Since the setting was Russian, I figured you were either from there or had family there

We can give more interesting answers that can help you come up with more interesting writing

RebelVampire

@Historical Jesus Your questions are getting a little personal, and while I understand the logic behind them, keep in mind we're here to discuss the comic and not the creators' personal lives.

keii4ii

Yeah... I feel even if the creators are okay with discussing it, this stuff is best left to DM

Historical Jesus

I understand. I would like to give her the choice. If she chooses not to then I understand. Biologically speaking, I think art is meant to be personal.

keii4ii

(and of course, if they don't want to discuss it, no one should pressure them about it )

RebelVampire

yeah if @Cryo wants to answer that's fine. Just for the future please keep those sorts of questions to a minimum and watch the wording on them. Cause that statement did sound overly pressure filled.

Historical Jesus

of course

keii4ii

I don't think we should be getting further into this territory?

RebelVampire

Agreed. This isn't a really appropriate topic for #week_long_bookclub, @Historical Jesus and has little to do with the comic.

Historical Jesus

I understand. I'm trying to demonstrate the the relevance and the benefits of understanding the author as a person. And again, it's her choice to choose what she discloses.

RebelVampire

And again, I get the logic. But just not appropriate for this discussion.

Historical Jesus

fair enough. I just want it to be known

I rephrased the question so it's less assertive. I apologies, I suck with social skills. Hopefully by the time she reads it, then it will be more inviting for her.

RebelVampire

thats better wording for sure, thank you.

Historical Jesus

no problem

art was definitely designed to be personal. The reason why a lot of big budget art feels bland is because it's meant for everyone and they have to not get too deep into offending people. Because it has to make money. That requires the work of a true genius. D&W is specialized and it will attract a certain group of people. Mostly people who value anonymous culture like myself. Or so I imagine.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 7. Which characters do you enjoy seeing interact the most? What about their dynamic interests you?

QUESTION 8. Will Lin actually go through with her plan to get into politics? If so, do you believe she can actually make a difference? What obstacles do you think she might run into, and do you think Dan will be of any help to her?

Cryo

(i would appreciate not having to talk about my life and anyones political beliefs neither here nor in DMs, thanks for understanding)(edited)

Historical Jesus

Understood

Historical Jesus

7: Dan, primarily because he is relatable. He would interact the way I would. Not having money sucks.

Historical Jesus

8: Will in go into politics? Probably not. She strikes me as a neroatypycal character. I could be wrong though.

RebelVampire

@snuffysam If the worm was designed to improve VR, I really want to meet the person who decided that making ppl martyrs was the way to go. Cause that's some backwards thinking, imo at least XD

5) There's a lot of really great ones, but I'm kind of fond of the illustration of Dan puking up rainbows. It's this cool mix of gross, psychedelic, and not what I expected. It expressed a lot of mood somehow for something that's less grand than I usually pick. 6) I think Dan will find Eve again, if only cause from a technical perspective she was introduced super early on to not be important. However, I think meeting her again is just gonna make him feel bad about himself as he realizes how little his baby steps of improvement are. In regards to his family, just gonna be bold and say my theory: his dad is part of that political group that took control and really hates cyborgs and technology and all that. Thus they were probably not the most open-minded and rejected Dan in multiple ways both through emotional abuse and neglect.

7) I like seeing Dan and Troy right now. Everyone else in the comic is kind of...shitty towards Dan. Like i know Dan isn't the greatest person, but I would hate to be in the situation where I'm constantly being told I'm a junkie who won't amount to anything. Which I mean don't get me wrong, those are interesting interactions. But Troy? Troy is this new person whose only experience with Dan is kind of a nice if not high tension one. Troy comes with a fresh, no prior knowledge of Dan perspective, and I think that's really interesting and gonna be a good way to shed new light on Dan's more positive traits. 8) I think Lin will try to go through with it, but I think Lin is fighting a losing game. Short of stuffing the ballot, I don't think those she's trying to help will vote for her. Instead they'll just bitch and be complacent to the world around them. But on that same vain, Lin probably could just stuff the ballots to win. I umm...honeslty don't think Dan can help her in anyway. Dan is really busy helping himself to suck less at the moment. XD

RebelVampire

QUESTION 9. What sorts of art or story details have you noticed in the way the comic is crafted that you think deserves attention?

QUESTION 10. What do you think Sandman and Fixer will find in regards to the Worm as the story continues, and what does the VR cafe Sandman has been hacking have to do with anything? How will Nate tie into this given he’s looking for Fixer?

RebelVampire

QUESTION 11. What do you think are this particular comic’s strengths? What do you think makes this comic unique? Please elaborate.

QUESTION 12. Overall, what role do you think Troy will have within the story? Additionally, how will she get out of her situation with having no ID, money, or much in the way of people she knows?

Historical Jesus

9: The art against the web design literally looks like something we would see at Def Con

10: I image he has a lead. After all his motivation is revenge

11: it’s strength is that it's good at making people empathize with characters even if you can't relate to them

12: I don't think Troy will get out of her situation. If she comes back to the states empty handed she will be fired. It might be in her best interest to get wrapped up in finding the worm programmer

Typically speaking large scale worms are state sponsored but it's not clear how far this thing actually spreads.

RebelVampire

9) My favorite details so far have been the small things in the background. Like the random graffiti on the walls, the cracks and dilapidation of the buildings, all the small do-dads in Lin's place. Like none of that needs to be there to create a complete background, but it adds so much character to the setting and each character. So I really appreciate the extra mile taken for that. 10) I think Sandman and Fixer are gonna find that some corporation or someone high up on some food chain made it on purpose. As for the VR cafe? Honestly, I think it's a red herring and Sandman is making an excuse to target them just cause he hates them. As for Nate, I think Nate is gonna join the investigation team but also kind of serve as a negotiator between Fixer and Dan. Cause I don't think those two will get along without help.

11) I think this comic's strengths are a) the setting both visually and story wise, as it's a really strong and vivid setting. then b) Dan. It is very, very hard to write a character like Dan. There are so many things he does that could immediately make him unlikeable, what between the drugs, self destruction, and general assholeness to some of the ppl around him. but yet he is likeable. you do want to see him succeed and not suffer. yet you also still can acknowledge hes unreliable. its a great dynamic that lesser writing could not pull off. 12) I think Troy is gonna be their viewport into the corporate world. Which I think will play a role since there is a themeing here about evil corporations. Plus, she at least knows some stuff better than they do, as she already showed off at the VR cafe. But getting out of it? Nope. Shes stuck and probably gonna make another panicked call to Dan at some point. And Dan will be an angel and help again.

snuffysam

I'm going to go out on a limb here. Not only will Lin go through with running for office, she'll win. And she won't even have to stuff the ballot that much. But... I'm not sure her fight will be over there. After all, there's more than just one corrupt person in the country. I agree with you on the investigation into the Worm, @RebelVampire . I think someone up the corporate ladder is responsible. With that said, I don't think Sandman is targeting the VR cafe for nothing. I think he's trying to draw more attention to their security flaws for... some reason. I guess to get more people involved in investigating? I doubt he foresaw Troy showing up and offering to upgrade the cafe's machines though, so I that probably isn't part of his plan. I think a major part of Dan's character arc going forward will be accepting that he doesn't need Eve. Like, accepting that he doesn't need her help to get better, and that he's the only one he needs to prove his progress to.

Dan's character writing is absolutely my favorite part of this comic. In a weaker comic, I would absolutely hate how a self-destructive character like Dan is portrayed. Like, often characters with addiction/other mental health problems in fiction come off as unlikeable, or too cartoonish, or too depressingly stagnant (at least, from what I've seen in other works of fiction). But Drugs & Wires strikes a great balance where character progression isn't always linear, and isn't always positive, but it's there, and that fluidity makes you want to root for him more each chapter.

Attila Polyák

Now that I finally read all of it... 1, The bridge scene at the end of chapter 4, that was really done. 2, Dan's implant... I'm pretty sure it can be fixed, but I have doubts if Dan will ever have the resources to have it fixed. As a matter of fact I feel like he'll never have the money or influence to have it fixed and the way it is he can't really replace it either, so... He's probably stuck without VR. 3, Lin! She's awesome! 4, Probably the grey market implant dealers, even though that's kinda bog standard cyberpunk stuff. :) 6, Yes, they will probably meet again. And yes, I do feel like we'll need to see more of Dan't past history especially about how he got involved in... well in everything that's his current life. 7, Nagy, as surreally odd, is a great addition to Dan. Like at times I thought his absurdity would actually help Dan. 8, Ofc she will, you don't forge that much "voter trust" for nothing. And Dan, tho probably seemingly unwillingly, will likely help her one way or another.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 13. What are you most looking forward to in the comic? Also, do you have any final thoughts to share overall?

QUESTION 14. Do you think Dan will ever be able to kick his drug habit, or will he continue to fall back into it forever? How will this affect his relationships? Further, how will his habits shape his future role in the story?

RebelVampire

13) I'm looking forward to getting more info about the worm. Cause right now I dont feel any more knowledgeable than I did at the start, and I'm itching to see Sandman, Fixer, or Dan to somehow get a bigger clue to what's going on. 14) I think both will apply. In that Dan will kick the habit eventually but will always be at risk because addiction is not really something you just completely cure. It's a battle he'll have for his entire life, even if he learns to manage it. As for for his relationships, I don't think it'll have much affect, tbh. Maybe things with Lin will improve, maybe Eve. But everyone else is kind of a jerk who already writes him off. Dan is in need of a fresh start somewhere far away.

Historical Jesus

13: Same here. I would like to know more about the worm. I hope that Cyro puts a cool technical characteristic into the worms behavior so that creates interesting and unique challenges for the characters 14: Statistically speaking most people do not kick their drug habit's. Especially not in the position he is in. Based on the story's cultural nature, I doubt the ending will be happy. But I am sure it will be interesting

Cryo

Thanks so much for picking and reading our comic this week! I've had a great time reading all the replies, especially since we don't hear from new readers often, and it's gonna come in handy when we get back into writing more stuff for the comic.

snuffysam

I had a great time reading it, Cryo!

Io.Black

Just wanted to add my own thanks to everybody who took the time to read and comment this past week. As a writer, it’s always incredibly valuable to get a sense of what people are taking away from your work, as well as where they think it’s headed.

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Drugs & Wires this week! Please also give a special thank you to Mary Safro & Io Black for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Drugs & Wires, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: https://www.drugsandwires.fail/

Drugs & Wires’ Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/drugsandwires

Drugs & Wires’ Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/Cryodraws

Drugs & Wires’ Merch: https://www.hellovoid.online/

Safro’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/marysafroart

Io Black’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/b_iologic

[badwolf-in-the-impala]

~The Absent Heart~

~Part 9~

Previous Parts:  ((~Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 -Part 8 - Part 9~))

Image credit: badwolf-in-the-impala

Chapter warnings:

A/N: I am so sorry I haven’t posted on this one in a while...writers block has been killing my soul on this one recently 0.0 and I’m a terrible person, I know...especially with the cliffhangers. I have issues lol anywho, the follow up to this chapter should hopefully be up sooner as I have this entire week off. Which means instead of adulting, I’m gonna write instead! **YAY**

As always, thanks for putting up with me and reading my stories. It means a lot <3

If you would like to be added to the TAGLIST, just let me know!

---------------------------

As the days drug on, Ivar found himself growing only more and more impatient. Freya’s condition only seemed like it was worsening, meaning their journey was put on further delay. Torvi working tirelessly round the clock as he hovered, providing the care she needed to keep the infection from spreading, but she had yet to fully wake from the fever fueled slumber into which she had slipped; save for the night she had woken the whole camp with her screaming.

Lost in the violent throws of a fevered nightmare, shouting incoherently in her native tongue, Saxon -- language she had not spoken in years -- as she writhed helplessly in pain on the makeshift bed in her tent. It had taken both himself and Ubbe to hold her down while Torvi forced a concoction down her that put her back under. It was stressful to say the least...and Ivar couldn’t stop placing blaming himself.

Obsessing over every little detail of events leading up to where they were now. If he hadn’t of drug her to that feast, just let her work instead like she wanted to, maybe she wouldn’t have stumbled into that girl; Runa? Wouldn’t have protected her, wouldn’t have taken her place for the beating that neither of them deserved...if he had just made her stay behind? Hadn’t asked her to come at all? But then again, perhaps it simply had been fated to happen, like Floki keep trying to assure him.

But Ivar refused to let it go, obstinate as ever.

It was weighing heavily on the entire group, driving a wedge between brothers as they argued on what should be done, given the current situation. Sigurd suggesting that he and whoever so wished to join, should take Floki and venture ahead to scout and secure their location. The mere thought sending Ivar spiraling into a rage that took hours to calm him out of. Ubbe only adding fuel to the fire when he suggested Sigurd might have a point, and Hvitserk choosing to side with no one and remain out of the argument. Already knowing that neither party would be able to agree in the end.

“Maybe they are right, Ivar?” Floki had chimed in sometime later, once Ivar had calmed down enough to listen. Earning a menacing glare from the youngest Ragnarsson. Floki holding his hands up defensively. “We will have to leave sometime, my dear Ivar...with or without her, I fear will not be your decision.”  

“I do not wish to speak of it anymore, Floki...now leave!” Ivar snapped, dismissing the older man with a sharp gesture of his hand. Floki bowed, an air of sarcasm underlying his actions as he turned on his heel to leave; ignoring the frustrated scream that rang out down the beach behind him.

“As you wish, my Prince.”

The days had started to blur together in a repetitive routine of pacing the beach, scavenging what little food could be found, and sitting at Freya’s bedside...praying to the Gods that she wake soon. Patience was wearing thinner by the day among the men, and if circumstances did not change, and soon, Ivar feared there would likely be an uprising.

“Explain it to me again, Torvi. If the fever is gone, why has she not woken yet?” Ivar demanded impatiently for what seemed like the hundredth time.

“I have told you time and time again, Ivar, I do not know when or even if she will wake.” Torvi gave an exasperated sigh. She had expended every resource she had available in an attempt to help Freya; but to no avail. She remained lost in the grasp of what ever dream-world the fever had been pulled her inside of.

“I am not Helga.” She admitted with defeat.  “Perhaps if she were here, she would know if something more could be done...it just-- it does not make sense.”

“Her body is here, physically. But her mind? The Gods have pulled her mind else where.” Ivar stopped pacing just long enough to roll his eyes at Floki who had just seemingly materialized out of no where; interrupting the conversation.  

“I am not in the mood for your ridiculous analogies, Floki.” Ivar spoke harshly as he resumed his pacing, blue eyes staring at Freya’s motionless form as if she would wake up at any moment. Floki turned his attention to Torvi who simply shook her head at the boat builder, motioning for them to step outside. The conversation resuming once they were out of earshot of the tent.

“I am at a loss, Floki.” Torvi admitted. “I have done everything I can think of...everything Helga has taught me; and yet, she does not wake!” Floki nodded in answer, stroking his beard thoughtfully as he stared out at the vast sea before them.

“The Gods have a plan, Torvi...and while I may not know what that plan is, I do know that Freya is meant to be part of it.” He replied. “One thing I do know for sure, we can not stay here any longer.”

“I know.” Torvi replied. “I have done all that I can here...her fever is broke and the wounds seem to no longer fester. She can be moved, but she will be at the mercy of the sea once we set sail.” Floki nodded in return, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder as he turned back towards the tent in which Ivar still remained.

“It is a risk we are going to have to take.”

The seas had become increasingly rough, day after day, storm after storm; it made keeping course a constant battle. It also made caring for the unconscious Freya more difficult as they traveled. Most of the men were unnerved by her eerie appearance...so lifeless, yet still so alive. Many had even begun to blame the growing string of bad luck on her.

In the few weeks since resuming their journey, they had tracked off course, drifting for several days in the wrong direction before it was corrected. Multiple men had begun to fall ill from an unknown ailment, and three boats had perished to storms along with the countless men that crewed them. Many a whisper had spread of her body being cursed. Some even brave enough to dare threaten to throw her into the sea, in hopes that perhaps it would please the Gods? Though none dared come close enough to attempt such a reckless thing with Ivar sitting guard.

It was a death sentence in and of it’s self to challenge the Cripple, let alone try to take what rightfully belonged to him. Slave or not, he had already made it clear she was not to be harmed. But with rations running low and tensions running high, many of his fellow Viking brothers were starting to press their luck.  

“You tempt fate to freely, Cripple!” One man exclaimed, pointing a finger in Ivar’s direction accusingly. “That Slave bitch is cursed! I can feel it. She should be thrown to the depths as offering to Ægir; for the sake of everyone!” Many of the men and women on their boat cheered in agreement, arguing back and forth what should be done as Ivar seethed silently. Floki’s attempts at reason going unheard as the voices grew louder, drawing several of the nearby boats in as they took advantage of the eerily calm seas.

“You would do best to hold your tongue!” Ivar growled in a murderous tone, pointing a dagger back at the man who was making the accusations. Bracing himself against one crutch as he hovered protectively in front of Freya’s body, alongside Torvi and Floki.

“What in Odin’s name is going on?!” Ubbe yelled as himself and Hvitserk crossed over from their boat to Ivar’s; taking in the scene before them carefully.  

“Your Crippled brother has lost his fucking mind!” The same man from before shouted, pointing to Freya’s body that lie safely at the rear of the boat, just out of reach. “She’s cursed, I can feel it in my bone! Her body needs gotten rid of!”  Cheers of agreement erupted again into the evening air.

“Over my dead body!” Ivar roared over the noise as he lurched forward, dagger ready. Ubbe stepping in between his brother and the rest of the boat, allowing Hvitserk to take stance in Ivar’s previous place guarding Freya.

“Enough!” Ubbe yelled, the boat falling silent for a moment as everyone’s attention fell to him. “I know we have had some ill fated luck, but that does not mean we are to start throwing people overboard. So long as she still draws breath, she stays.”

“But--” The man started to protest, cut off by the sharp glare Ubbe gave in return.

“I would choose silence, if you wish to keep your tongue.” He stated, one hand still planted firmly against Ivar’s chest. The youngest Ragnarsson sneering after the man as he turned, retreating through the throng of people that had gathered, stepping onto the other boat without another word.

“Reign it in, Ivar.” Ubbe warned lowly as he turned to face his brother. “We are all on edge, but now is not the time, nor the place. Understood?”

Ivar remained silent as he narrowed his gaze back at his brother. Rage burning rampant through his sapphire eyes as he took his place back beside Freya protectively as Ubbe ordered everyone to return to their places.

The wind starting to pick up steadily as storm clouds grayed what little light was left in the sky. Hvitserk exchanging a worried glance with Ubbe as Floki rushed to the front of the boat. The atmosphere shifting abruptly as the swells started to grow and raindrops started to fall from the darkening sky. Lightning cracking overhead violently, followed by an ominous rumble of thunder that shook everyone into terrified silence.

“Drop the sails! Drop the sails!” Floki shouted franically, several men rushing to get it lowered as the surrounding boats followed suit. Ubbe pushing his way to the front, stopping short of where Floki was perched on the bow, clutching to the wooden serpents head like his life was about to depend on it. Watching helplessly as the eye of the storm barreled toward their fleet.

“What do we do?” Ubbe questioned as he looked up to the boat builder.

“We pray to the Gods that that mans superstitions aren’t right, my dear Ubbe...that is what we do.”

---------------------------------------

Additional Notes: In Norse mythology, Ægir is a sea jötunn associated with the ocean. He is also known for being a friend of the gods and hosting elaborate parties for them. He is the namesake for the exoplanet previously known as Epsilon Eridani b.

TAGLIST: @greennightspider r​ @captstefanbrandt @microsmacrosandneedles @irishhiggins @dmv49 @naaladareia @readsalot73 @terrainhead

[serenitylost]

Apprentice Week, Day 5: Family (@thearcanaweek)

Love, Emma In which Kori is flighty, selfish, & irresponsible.

(Read it here or on AO3)

Dear Kori,

How are you? It feels like an age since we’ve talked. I know letters aren’t really your ‘thing’ but how else am I supposed to keep an eye on you? I’m kidding, don’t worry, I know you can ‘handle yourself’ or whatever. Just try not to get into too much trouble, OK?

So tell me about Vesuvia! What’s it like? Are the people kind there? I hear there are some nasty types in the underbelly of the city, but of course you can’t believe everything people say. How’s Aunt Violet doing? Does she still throw salt at people she doesn’t like? I’m telling you, just because something’s funny doesn’t make it any less rude. But to each their own, I suppose.

Dad & Pa are doing well. Business at the bakery has been especially good lately - Dad came up with this new pastry that has poppy seeds baked into the dough, and I guess people really like it? Pa has been trying to get me to wake up at dawn every morning to train, and I’m trying, I really am, but damn is it hard.

Anyway, I hope you’re having plenty of (safe) adventures and do tell Violet I said hello! (But don’t mention the salt thing OK?)

Love, Emma

Dear Kori,

It’s been nearly a month and I haven’t heard from you, which means either you sent something and it got lost (or delayed maybe?) or - and this seems far more likely - you simply haven’t written back. Which, I mean, I get it. You’re busy, probably having the time of your life learning all this fancy magic stuff, but...nothing at all? Really? You can write something short, you know, that would be fine. I just want to know how you’re doing.

Anyway. Things are good here. We’ve got more money coming in now, what with the success of the Poppy Poppers (yes, that’s what they’re called, yes, I know it’s terrible but you know how Dad gets about these things). Dad’s been talking about saving up, expanding the shop, hiring more staff and whatnot. Not immediately, but looking toward the future, you know?

I hope you’re well. Please write back, Kori. I miss you.

Love, Emma

Em,

Sorry I haven’t written. You know how it is. Vesuvia is great, it’s so big you wouldn’t believe it. I got into a fight with this thief the other day and he invited me to play cards with his gang downtown so that’s been fun. Also I told Aunt V about the salt thing and she thought it was hilarious. She’s not half as ornery as you make her out to be.

Take care of yourself, Em! And by that I mean don’t forget to relax every once in a while. You don’t have to worry about me, I promise.

-Kori

Dear Kori,

It was lovely to hear from you, thank you for writing back. But how on earth can you tell me to relax when you say things like ‘I got into a fight with this thief the other day’?!! You need to be more careful, Kori. You can’t go around fighting every person you meet.

Dad’s come down with a bit of a cold so Pa and I have been managing the shop this past week. Which means we haven’t had much time to train, but we did spar yesterday and you’ll never guess what happened - I beat him, Kori! He won’t admit it, of course, but I swear to god I got in a good sideswipe before he came at me with that spin thing he does. He totally left himself open, and now he’s claiming I barely grazed him. Yeah right.

What have you been up to? (Besides getting into fights with strangers.) What kinds of things has Violet been teaching you? Can you conjure fire from your fingertips yet? Or is that not a thing? I want to hear all about it! In the meantime, promise me you won’t get up to anything too dangerous, OK?

Love, Emma

Dear Kori,

So Dad’s cold hasn’t cleared up yet. It’s probably nothing serious, but we’re sending for the doctor to get it checked out. Most of the time he seems OK, but he’s been coughing a lot and Pa says it’s better to be safe. It’s expensive of course but we can afford it - the bakery expansion will just take a little longer, that’s all.

I hope everything is well with you. Tell Aunt Violet I wish her well, too.

Love, Emma

Dear Kori,

The doctor says that Dad has something in his lungs. Some kind of infection, or growth? I don’t know, I don’t really understand it. She’s put together a treatment plan and says she’s had a lot of success with other patients. Pa says we shouldn’t worry, the doctor knows what she’s doing. But He’s probably right.

How long before you come home? It would be good to have you back. Even just for a visit. It would help, I think, for Dad to see you. We all miss you, you know.

Love, Emma

Dear Kori,

The doctor’s treatments aren’t working. She says there are other things she can try, that she’s optimistic, but...I don’t know. It’s serious, Kori. Please come home.

Love, Emma

Darling Emma,

I received your letter. Forgive me for reading it, but Kori has not been staying here for weeks now. She set off to ‘get a taste of the open road,’ as she put it. She’s got that wanderlust, you know. I don’t know her exact location but I do know the direction she took, and I’ve done my best to forward your letter. With a little luck (and a little magic), it should find her.

I’m packing my bags and will be heading up within the next day or two. If Theo is sick, I want to be there.

May fireflies light your way in the dark, Auntie Violet

Em,

Got your letter. I’ll be there as soon as I can.

-Kori

Kori,

Where the HELL did you go? No one’s seen you since Thursday, and Dad & Pa have been worried sick. They’re convinced you must be dead in a ditch somewhere, even though Violet did some magical hoo-ha and swears you’re just fine. It’s not good for Dad to worry like this, Kori, the stress is only going to make him worse.

So here’s what’s going to happen. You’re going to come back, and you’re going to do it immediately. Because if you don’t, I swear to everything holy that I will kick your ass from here to the Blighted Sea.

And don’t you dare pretend you didn’t get this letter. Violet magicked it and she says it can find you anywhere, so no excuses.

Love, Emma

Dear Kori,

OK, I’m worried. Violet still says you’re fine but I don’t trust her magic. Dad’s getting worse by the day. Please come back, Kori. Please. Your family needs you. Dad needs you. I need you. I can’t lose you both. I can’t. Please, just let me know you’re OK.

Love, Emma

Em,

I’m fine. Everything’s fine. It’s just hard, you know? I’ll come back, I promise. Just not yet.

-Kori

Kori,

No. It’s not fine. How fucking dare you. Dad is dying, can you not understand that? You don’t get to think about yourself right now. You don’t get to run away and pretend that nothing’s wrong. He needs you. Get your head out of your selfish ass and come the hell back. Right now. No excuses. This is not the time for your shit.

Love, Emma

Dear Kori,

I’m sorry. I love you. Look, it’s OK, I forgive you, just come back. I promise I won’t give you shit about it, alright? Dad wants to see you. If you don’t come now, you might not get the chance to say goodbye.

Love, Emma

Kori,

He’s dead. I hope you’re happy.

-Emma

[vizhi0n]

Sundown - Part 4

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Whooo well here we go the moment you’ve all been waiting for sorta kinda. Plus we’re inching towards the end ladies and gents. 

@flames-bring-a-ton-of-ash @kijilinn @ladylorelitanyfanfiction @hannibalssweaters @manawhaat @negans-network @i-am-negan-trash @jasoncrouse @kellyn1604 @crzcorgi @lucifers-trash-stash @genevievedarcygranger @heartfulloffandoms @strangersangel9 @tolieboy @superprincesspea @divadinag @alyisdead @rapsity @fxcking-negan @haleyea @my-achilles--heel @mypapawinchester  wow its letting me tag ppl that i couldnt tag before but NOT letting me tag ppl i could tag before this website is legit terrible)

Lemme know if you want to be tagged or untagged

Warnings: This chapter is just literal smut. Also loss of virginity, blood, Negan’s potty mouth. 

“Negan. Get your ass to bed, seriously.”

“I’ll be there in a fucking second,” Negan murmured. He grunted as he dragged one of the chairs across the room, tucking the back beneath the door handle. He took a look out the window once more before closing the blinds. I could only see his silhouette as he walked towards me, gently lowering himself onto the ground. He removed his boots before lying on his back shoulder to shoulder with me.

We stared at the ceiling for a good long while, until Negan shifted next to me.

“You asleep?”

“No,” I murmured. “It’s kind of hard when you’re this close to me.”

“What? Do you think I’m going to fucking stab or something?” Negan scoffed. “I’m not that fucking low. Unlike Rick the Prick.”

“He never—”

“He did. Stabbed all my men at one of my outposts in the middle of the night,” Negan replied. “Didn’t even give them a fighting chance. Fucking coward.” 

“i wasn’t there for that,” I whispered. “I wasn’t there for half of that. I was a fucking babysitter, remember?”

“Hey, I’m just stating the facts,” Negan replied. I finally gathered the courage to roll over and face him, careful not to jostle my sore shoulder. I could feel his breath on my face and the heat radiating from his body. When Negan smiled I could see the white of his teeth. “There she is.”

“Why are you trying so hard to get me to betray Rick? Do you really think I’m that gullible?”

“I want you.”

“Excuse me?”

“I want you. On my fucking team,” Negan explained. “I suppose I want you in that fucking way, too, but that’s not what I’m talking about here. It’s clear Rick doesn’t give a shit about you—”

“I don’t care. This whole thing if bigger than me, bigger than Rick—”

“Why do you think Eugene has stayed with us for so long? I wouldn’t have kept his ass around if he’d tried to run. That fucker would have been dead — you want to know why he sticks around? Because he trusts me, and he trusts the system I put in place.”

“Or he’s just scared.”

“He’s not fucking scared. And neither are you,” Negan’s thumb grazed across my bottom lip. “I promise, you’d be taken care of. Hell, you can still fucking garden. And there are plenty of mothers here who would love a babysitter. And you can fight. But you’d be respected. I’d make sure of that.”

“Did you make that same promise to Sasha before you killed her?”

“I never laid a hand on Sasha, and that’s the goddamn honest-to-God truth. She suffocated in that coffin—”

“A coffin that you put her in. Don’t pull that shit with me,” I was aware how close Negan was. His breathing was a feather-light breeze against my lips, dark eyes glinting in the moonlight. “You’re going to have to do better than that, Negan. Be better that. Be better in general—”

“You think I’d fucking change for you? Bullshit. And I don’t expect you to fucking change shit for me. Keep that scowl on your fucking face and don’t let it leave,” Negan purred. “That was my last offer. You said it yourself — we shouldn’t focus on the fucking future.”

“What should we focus on?”

“You know what I fucking want,” Negan’s hand brushed against my hip. “You know damn well what it is we can do to pass the time.”

I made a noise in the back of my throat. His kiss muffled my next words, rough fingers pinching the skin above my hipbone.

You’ve never kissed a boy before what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck—

His beard scratched my skin. It didn’t hurt, but it wasn’t something I was used to. My brain was officially on autopilot, unsure of what to do with the new emotions, these new feelings. His touches felt good. His lips felt good.

“Let me fucking make you feel good,” Negan murmured. His hand went from my waist to my jeans. He toyed with the zipper, chuckling against my mouth. “Lord knows you fucking need it after the fall you took.”

“Don’t remind me. I’m pretty sure I’m concussed — explains why I’m letting you fucking do this.”

“Hush,” Negan murmured. I was rolled onto my back, pinned beneath his heavy body. He was wincing as his injured leg strained, but he kept going. I chuckled as his beard tickled my neck. He kissed a stripe from my collarbone to my jaw, taking his time. I felt his length press against my thigh and I deftly grabbed it, palming him through his pants. His tipped his head back and groaned, giving me a perfect chance to suckle on his throat.

“You feel that? It’s all for you,” Negan cooed. “All fucking yours.”

I grunted, eagerly shoving  my hand beneath his pants. I was desperate to touch him. I wanted to touch him before I chickened out —

I glanced down, tugging at his cock. I could see his leaking head and when I met his gaze, his eyes were glazed over with pure, unadulterated lust.

“Fuck,” Negan breathed. He thrusts his hips into my hand, eyes fluttering. “Fucking fuck — I need to be inside you.”

Now are you going to tell him?

I released him, arching my back as he yanked my jeans down my thighs. I kicked them away, swallowing nervously as Negan freed his cock from the confines of his pants, wasting no time in caging me between his arms. He steadied himself, brushing the head against my wet folds.

“You fucking want this?”

I did. I verbalized it with a nod of my head. He was big, and it would hurt — I knew the pain wouldn’t bother me, and I was already wet enough. It was the closeness. I could already feel it — the sweat from his body, the smell of leather and salvaged cologne and blood. It was like a blanket I could taste the liquor as he kissed me twice on the mouth, easing the tip in slowly.

My toes curled into the carpet. I gripped the floor with on hand in anticipation, the other reaching up to tug at the hairs on the nape of Negan’s neck. He sunk in slow and deep until I felt full, until I could barely breathe —

“Shit. Holy fuck you’re tight — shit,” Negan rested his forehead against mine. After a brief moment he lifted his head, grunting as he continued to lazily roll his hips. “Were you lying about not being a virgin?”

“You never said anything about it having to be a dick inside me,” I groaned.

“I fucking didn’t, but you should have told me,” Negan slowed even more. When he went to pull out I stopped him.

“I want this.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah,” I said through gritted teeth. “Keep going.”

He obeyed, stifling my cries with a kiss. He wasn’t going slow — I knew that the slower he went, the more it would hurt. My cries withered down to rhythmic whines as he gripped my cheeks, forcing me to look at him.

“Let go, baby,” Negan murmured. He reached down and circled my clit with his thumb. “Let go for me.”

He fucked me into oblivion, pinching my clit and increasing his thrusts until I was flailing, heels kicking at the carpet. He pulled out a few moments later, pumping his dick with one hand. Cold air hit my skin as he yanked my shirt up, painting my stomach with milky pearls.

“Fucking beautiful,” Negan whispered, chest heaving. He slowly eased out, and I winced. “Shit. Did I fucking hurt you?”

“No. I was already hurt, remember?” I struggled to speak, coming down from an intense high that I’d never felt before. It was a combination of pure ecstasy and pure pain. I had no desire to move any part of my body, and I didn’t. “Holy shit.”

His knuckles stroked my cheek. He pulled me into a kiss, settling down by my side. I slipped my hands beneath his shirt, skimming the pads of my fingers against his chest.

“Never done it with a fucking guy, huh? I was your fucking first?”

“Yeah.”

“How was I?”

“Fine,” Negan seemed a bit offended. I shrugged, hugging his jacket around my body. There was a soreness between my legs that I desperately wished would go away. Feeling a bit sorry for potentially damaging his already fragile ego, I admitted, “It was good. I liked it. I’d…I’d do it again.”

“Oh, I have the fucking stamina for that.”’

“That’s great, but I wasn’t talking about now. We both need to rest. Just…let’s go to sleep, okay?”

Negan nodded, spreading his arms Hesitantly I slipped into his embrace, not knowing what to expect. Gentleness was the last thing I’d ever though Negan capable of, yet here he was, holding me against him and stroking my back.

Close your eyes. Rest.

I did.

I opened my eyes first. A heavy arm was draped across my waist. I was snuggled up against Negan’s side, my head resting on his chest. The older man had yet to stir, so I was extra careful when I slowly peeled myself away.

I let him rest. His leg looked good, not infected, not swollen or pus filled like I’d originally feared. He wouldn’t be able to properly walk for at least a week, and I knew that we definitely didn’t have that much time before our luck ran out.

I uncapped some water and took a swig, feeling my stomach tighten. We’d each only consumed enough food to keep up and awake, but my body craved more. I wouldn’t listen to it.

It was still dark outside. Early. I certainly didn’t feel well rested and I was sure Negan would feel the same. Five hours of sleep was better than nothing.

“Get your fine as back down here,” I heard Negan murmured. I turned — he was staring, a smirk on his handsome face. “It’s fucking early.” “Negan—”

“C’mon. I want to taste that sweet pussy one more time before I die.”

I flinched at his vulgarity, before dismissing it — I used the same language, daily. Such a similarity was enough to make me question whether or not Negan and I had more in common than I’d initially realized.

“We aren’t dying. Quit being dramatic.”

“I’m not being dramatic I’m fucking being realistic. And I’m never one to pass up free pussy,” Negan crooked his finger and I groaned, surrendering and crawling across the carpet towards him. “Good girl.”

“I can’t believe you. I can’t believe that you even would want me—”

“And you say that…fucking why? Good pussy is good pussy, and you biting me turned me on way more than it probably fucking should have. Shit. I can’t believe you were a fucking virgin! You been saving yourself for someone fucking special?”

“No. Years of abuse and bullying really makes it hard to connect and feel vulnerable around people,” I tilted my head. “I mean, this was fine. It was better than fine. I just wish we, you know, had a bed. Maybe some music. Some fancy drinks.”

“I can give you all those things.”

“I mean, I have those back at Alexandria but okay.”

“But here, you’d have the best of all — me.”

I rolled my eyes and Negan laughed. “Man, if only your dick was the size of your ego.”

“Holy fuck that hurts.”

“Yes, it’s called a roast. It’s supposed to hurt,” I leaned on my side, using my elbow to prop myself up. I began tracing light patterns on Negan’s chest, humming, “How’s your leg?”

“Stings like a bitch, but I’ll live.”

“Stings to the point that you can’t run or just…stings? Like a discomfort but not a discomfort that’ll put you on the ground?”

“Look, if we end up having to make a break for it, you but your ass I’ll run,” Negan murmured. “But I’d rather it not come to that shit.”

“It might,” I said sadly. “We don’t have enough water to last.”

“My men will come—”

“Says who? There’s no telling what state their in right now, or how many are even alive. Simon looked and sounded pissed, Negan. This isn’t some little scratch you can put a band-aid on. We fucked you up, good,” I said seriously. “It’s now or never. I mean, seriously, don’t you want to get away from me?”

“No,” Negan whispered I rolled my eyes again as he leaned in, mouth brushing across my forehead before moving down to my lips. His kisses were intoxicating. His tongue was feather light against my own and he moved with gentleness I never thought him capable of.

“Negan,” I murmured, “C’mon. Get up. There’s no way you like me this much, stop pretending.”

“Who says I’m pretending? That’s all on you,” Negan held me still, pausing and staring into my eyes. “When’s the last time someone ever called you sexy?”

“Like, never.”

“For real?”

“Never. Dude, I told you, bullying, abuse and whatnot…” I turned away. “I really don’t want to delve deep into my tragic past or whatever. This was before the world went to shit. I honestly…I honestly think I’ve done better for myself these past few months than I did when everything was normal.” 

“What were you before?”

“I worked. I studied. I cried about stupid shit and isolated myself from everyone. I wanted to be an actress,” I laughed harshly. “Stupid. I even went to school for that shit. Thought I was going to make it or something. What about you?”

Negan didn’t reply. I sighed and added, “You mentioned your wife earlier. Who was she?”

“None of your fucking business.”

“This is supposed to be a mutual trust, a conversation where we equally exchange the same information,” I stared at the ceiling. “I feel like it is my business—”

“I don’t give a rats ass about you or your issues. It’s not my fucking job to coddle you and tell you how fucking special you are,” Negan snapped. “And it sure as hell isn’t my job to make you feel better by telling my sob story.”

“Do you even know how to hold a real conversation? Or is your default just ‘sarcastic, self-absorbed asshole?’”

Negan sat up, and I did the same. There was a burning anger in his eyes, but I remained sitting, stoic, trying not to give anything away. I had no doubt that he would kill me if he felt the sudden urge — fucking him had meant nothing.

Yet deep down you think it did.

“You’re lucky I find you fucking hot, or else you’d be a mess of brains on the fucking carpet right now,” Negan touched his thumb to my chin. “Watch what you say around me.”

“I’ll say whatever the hell I want,” I shoved his hand away. “Dude, you should no by now how little I think of your threats. Most threats, actually. But yours especially because they piss me off.”

Negan tilted his head to the side. I half expected him to grab Lucille and just use it on me, right then and there. His expression was so neutral that, for the first time, I found myself unable to outright tell whether he was pissed or not.

“I’ll let that shit slide. For you.”

“I’m honored. Is it because of my super hot, one-of-a-kind pussy?”

“No,” Negan replied sincerely. He laid back down as quickly as he’d sat up, adding, “It’s because I like you.”

I threw my head back and laughed. Negan didn’t join me. Instead he reached up and pulled me against him, mouth pressing eagerly against mine. His kisses were slower, more delicate, as if he were afraid of hurting me. When he pulled away he was grinning.

“I’d very much like to fuck you again,” Negan purred. “And then again. And again, until you forget your own fucking name.”

You have nothing to lose. You’re too far gone, anyway.

“Go for it.”