#i also wasnt planning on using color but i did anyways? because theres a bit of pronoun soup in some places

[mini-games]

-BEGINNING LORE/SUN SAGA-

In the beginning, most everyone lived in Item’s (@item-shoppe) basement, eventually escaping one way or another to Nefarious’s (@nefarious-exclam) tower or to set up their own place.

I, Mini, came along through anon. An anon (a different one) had supposedly been quoting the lyrics to a song, but none of us knew the song and took it seriously. So we killed the sun. How? Well Nef tried (and failed) to shoot it with a water gun, and one of his gimmick posts was shrinking someone down to the size of an ant. So, if they’re able to do both of those things, I figured “Why can’t he do both on the sun?”

I sent in an ask, on anon (before I had become a gimmick blog. I was wanting to be one at this point but didn’t know what my gimmick would be) telling him to shrink the sun down to the size of an ant and shoot it with a water gun. It worked, the sun was extinguished, and it all went dark in the universe. And cold.

After figuring out what gimmick I wanted to be, I quickly made a profile picture for the blog and made the blog itself, now being able to interact with everything easily. The first interaction I had was with Vance (@advancement-made), and they asked me why I would do that. I didn’t think it would actually work, but it did and I have been advised to not underestimate Nef again. I was also forgiven.

Meanwhile, the Ice People had come out of the ice caves (looking at you, @solidwater05. I know what you did. /silly) and were attacking Nefarious, trying to get him to become an Ice Person as well. Nefarious uses a lot of mana during this period of time, trying to fight them off. Also Vance and Glitches (@glitches-and-bugs) can glow, we found out.

Boss (@bossfight-messages) ends up making a deal with the Ice People, telling them that they’ll be an Ice Person if they are given blankets. This deal was never completed, however, as Boss never turned into an Ice Person. Guess it’s too late for that now, though.

In the meantime, Vance and I forged a plan to relight the sun by making a large bonfire and throwing the sun in it, since Nef still had the sun in their hands. Small fires went out pretty quickly, but we figured a large bonfire would take a while to go out. Vance ended up leaving to get some wood, whilst I left to get something to light the wood with. I found some matches, before the Ice People found me.

The Ice People tried convincing me to join them, eventually telling me about how they are lonely and just want a friend. I ended up breaking, and they infected me, turning me into an Ice Person with them.

Before I could do anything as an Ice Person (infecting others, hiding away in the Ice Caves, etc.), the sun returned to the sky, having been re-lit. Normally, I would’ve melted since I was ice, but it was night-time. So I still had time.

Status (@status-updates) ended up watching as everyone panicked about me being an Ice Person, as he sat on a thawing machine. Nefarious ended up making a bargain with Status for the thawing machine, and when Status agreed on the price, he took 50 extra gold from Nefarious for renting the thawing machine. Nef used the thawing machine on me, thawing away the ice. I was back to normal, and everything was right and good in Exclamania once more. Well, except for Nef. Especially since he was angry at Status for swindling them.

Nef also gave me one of his cloaks, since I was still quite cold after having been frozen for about an hour. They also revealed that he knew the Ice People once. This seems to be a pretty big part of both Nefarious and Select (@character-selecton) lore.

If anyone else has anything to add to the Beginning Lore/Sun Saga lore, feel free to add to it!

If needed, I can also post a plaintext version. If you need a plaintext version, just ask and I can post it!

[void-chara]

My gift for the @technoblade-gift-exchange !! i was assigned to @simplepotatofarmer who asked for dsmp rivals duo. i hope you like it Loyal!

rambling about headcanons, designs, and my process and stuff under the readmore, because i wanna talk about it but dont want the post to be super long !!

i had originally planned to not have a background and then at the last second i decided to speedrun drawing one in a few hours so um. quality difference but its fine. also unrelated but im pretty sure everything about how i draw animals and anthros makes it very obvious i used to be in the warrior cats fandom lol. anyway onto the designs!!

the gold on techno is scars from the totem at the execution, which i think is a pretty common thing for techno designs. he isnt supposed to be a piglin, but rather similar species of anthropomorphic pig. also his mane and tail fluff are naturally brown but he dyes them pink ^_^ so cool !! um. i maaayyy have forgotten the crown until i was way too far into the piece to add it. haha. oops. pretend its missing because. uuh. hes in a casual outfit. "but he still has the cape" yeah its comfy. "but dream has a mask thats not casual" dream is dream he does Not relax fully ever. see entirely intentional i would never make a mistake.

dream is an original shapeshifter species i came up with because i couldnt decide what i wanted him to be. i havent decided on a name for the species yet but i plan to make almost every solid-color or nearly solid color mcyt into this species. theyre mostly involuntary/unconscious shapeshifters. so like they change slowly over weeks or months to adapt to their surroundings, with little conscious control. basically i wanted him to be like five different things so i shoved them together lol, rabbit ears but in a pattern that looks like an axolotl, a cool tail, TOE BEANS tho you cant see them. this was actually the first time ive ever had a dream design im happy with so thats really nice.

i um. i made full use of my time lol, i spent a bit over a week on the lineart, another week on the coloring, and maybe a week and a half on rendering. unless i suddenly became shit at math(which is possible) that adds up to roughly the amount of time i had to work on it. im really proud of myself actually since i usually take a while to do art, and i wasnt sure i would be able to make something id be happy with in this amount of time. but i did! woah!! this was my first time participating in a fandom gift exchange and it was so fun, and also helped motivate me to draw more instead of getting distracted like i usually do (classic adhd moment) lol. anyway super cool!!

Loyal if u decided to read all this for some reason then again i really hope u like it!! u are so cool and i really love ur rivals duo opinions and creations so i hope u like this! i know theres been shit happening lately, i hope ur doing ok!!

[huntsman-ash]

RWBY V8E5 LiveThoughts

And now for the last episode before the HUGE break they’re taking. Seriously, February? Damn, whats going on at RT?

It matters not. Lets see what this weeks episode has for us.

And here we see Aminety Colloseum, the place that Atlas SHOULD have weaponized the moment it rolled its way back here. Seriously look at it; floating free away from everything else...you could mount missile launchers and laser batteries and CIWS batteries on it, launch fighters from it, let dropships deploy through its base...a floating aircraft carrier of unprecidented size.

Or maybe turn it into a weapon...use its drive system to focus Dust energy into some kind of gravitational force...thats just me though.

Missed oppertunites...ah well.

You CAN see its been adjusted though, it looks less like the sports arena from its last apperance and more like a floating coms hub, with those dishes on the outside and the huge spire.

Intersetingly if you look in the upper right corner the moon is there but almost completely covered by the storm Salem summoned. Interesting.

Wait why is PEITRO out there? With like...no supports? Seems kinda dangerous to send the weak old dude out there...

...thats a bomb. A Dust bomb in pipe bomb style form but thats very much a bomb.  Yes, Penny, danger indeed.

Atmospheric orbit. Ahhh that must be the low-level orbit path that they need to ensure it doesnt loose power. The part where you coast along with almost no drag.  Like what the X-15 hit in our world, and punched through at least once.

WAIT WHAT THE HELL IS THAT. Thats some kind of loader mech. THATS A FUCKING UTILITY TITAN. WHEN DID ATLAS GET ONE OF THOSE?!

Also thats a jet engine.

And Maria’s piloting it. To quote Daimon Baird; I know wha thappens when you let an angry chick loose with a power loader.

Multiple bombs...wait. Thats the mine that RWBY fought in with the Aces, the one that almost blew the fuck up. They’re... Oh. I get it now. They’re gonna use the blast to fling Amneity into upper orbit and stabalize it. Clever. Not exactly SAFE, but clever. Just hope the mine doesnt go anywhere important. Those tunnels are going to turn into firestorms.

Cute, she thinks she can stay and help. Trust me, Penny. You’re better off running.

MARIA CASUALLY DOING THE MEXICAN GRANDMOTHER THING WITH HER MECH...THE HIP HAND. MY GOD.

Oh, and his chair has gravity restraints too. They...gonna handle the impact of the launch? I mean thats literally a fuel/air bomb under them. Dust/air...

Well Maria seems alright with it.

OH GOD DAMMIT. Its Cinder isnt it? Fucking bitch...

On the positive side if she DOES hitch a ride then they get a chance to give her the ol’ “Long fall special”.  Lets see your maiden powers save you from a fall from near orbit.

Well then, she burned right through the floor. Interesting. Maiden powers or her own, who knows...I do admit seeing her ride the ship in like that is kinda cool.

The eagerness in Cinders remaining eye interest me. Also, even when using maiden powers, her dead eye emits nothing. So that whole parts just gone. 

Secondary note, I think they’re standing on the...Shade emblem? Shade is the swords I think. Vale is the axes, Atlas is the staff, Havens the lamp. Doubt it means anything.

Ahhh, okay I was gonna say, that launch was...kinda lackluster. But the blast is being used as a BOOST on top of the four existing external thrusters. Like the yellow emergency turbines on the outside of the Pillar of Autumn in the end cutscene of Halo Reach

Dust explodes in its own individual colors. The blast under them looks like a Pride festival.

Also Penny just going WHAP like that amuses me, whereas Cinder just crouches. Guess she knew what was coming.

I dont see how the blast is helping through...maybe its the pressure wave and we cant see it right.

Now THAT is a command and control table!

Based on the image I can see, the map is showing “Atlas Mantle” in the middle in green, Aminety in red to the north, and the whale as its own red marker just off to the west a bit of Atlas/Mantle. So now we know where everything is stationed.

The scales all kindsa weird tho

Ah THERES the G-force. Emeralds literally stuck to the floor.

And because Cinders an unoriginal bitch, fire swords. Im not impressed ot say the least.  On a side note that DOES mean that radiobandit was right about her powers, so theres that. I’d wager this is a combination of her semblance and the maiden abilities.

For those who follow me, Cinder’s blades here are similar in look to what Ash Vulcan can summon, minus the fire. His are more of a cooled obsidian look.  They are, however, as sharp as these are, but much less sturdy. Ex; the one that pins itself to the wall by Penny’s head would have shattered on impact, which Ash uses as a secondary ability. Because no one likes a hundred glass shards in their eyes...

OH HELL YES. Maria with the mech. Now, Cinder...TASTE METAL FIST.

RT...I salute you. Angry mother figure piloting a giant robot screaming “get away from her you bitch”. ALMOST had it. Almost.

What smacked into her though. Neo?

Yes, Neo piloting their escape craft. Interseting.

Emerald looks completely useless and confused and Neo is suddenly very much in a realization shes inside a tin can and MARIA IS OPERATING A GIANT TIN CAN OPENER

Emeralds semblance works on Maria. Interseting, so it must bypass eyes. Effect the brain specifically. Note to self for Chrys on that...

WHY did Neo take Ruby’s form when shes fighting Maria? On that Maria seems very happy to brawl on the ground now. Old habits die hard, I guess.

Additional math note; “broadcasting range” is, by this numerical, 543.523 of...whatever Remnant uses as units. On Earth, the edge of outerspace is almost exactly 100 km, or 62 miles, straight up. So going by that measurement... (Doing the math here hang on)...1 km is equal to 5.43 of Remnants distance units. Lets just say 5.5. Assuming Remnants edge is the same (but everything we’ve seen so far hints that it is, or at least very close)

Alternatively, since we heard klicks used in V4, but miles used in After The Fall, we can assume this is one of those, meaning that either broadcast altitude on Remnant is ABSURDLY HIGH, because 500km is literally 5 times the edge of space on earth, and 540 miles is ALMOST 9 TIMES AS HIGH. Either way Im pretty sure this is the first measurement of Remnants units we’ve seen.

Alternatively alternatively, judging by the arrows we see, these might be required velocity to maintain orbit, which MAY make a bit more sense but it doesnt really fit. Low orbital velocity on earth for example is 17,000 KPH. Even with the math above, theres still a TITANIC difference.

And now we see the numvers going down again because CINDER BURNED A HOLE IN THROUGH ONE OF THE STABALIZERS. Bitch.

Again on th e weaponizing the colleseum; look at all this empty space. They didnt even remove it from when it was a consorse for the festival. You could put SO MANY weapon emplacements...the landing pads are still there!

Oh so now Cinders a Dawnblade from RWBY is she.

And exploding arrows too. Alright then, sure, why not.

Not sure what the point of this little bit was, aside from Penny trying to draw Cinder off and Cinder going back because...evil? Bait for Penny? Who knows. 

Oh yeah, Marias having a GOOD time. Also, Neos face when she gets kicked in it; “NO, NOT THE SANDEL!”

Also the disrespect from Maria. Yes. Suck it, Neo.

Also theres some timeskippage, as there is NOT a 2 minute gap between when we see the clock the first time and when we see it now. I dont think, anyway. Im sure theres math to be done but it serves the purpose its suppose to, for tension.

Uhhhh...Cinder, please. Your Salem’s most bottom of bitches right now. She favors Hazel and Tyrian over you.

Did Cinder really just try for a does not compute moment. Or is she just out of ideas.

Cinder stealing the maiden powers reminds me of the Grip of the Devourer perk from the Necromatic Grips in Destiny 2. Mainly the green energy flowing. I know thats Pennys aura stuff but it does remind me.

Ahhh they got a plan with Emerald then. Interesting. Also Neo taking advantage of a distraction sounds like her. 

And Penny ONESHOTS Neo. Lets be real here, without aura? She’d be LIQUID. Or maybe ash. Not sure how Penny’s funnels (THEYRE STILL FUCKING FUNNELS DAMMIT) works.

Annnnddd you forgot shes a robot and sees aura didn’t you.  Again, without aura, she’d be dead. Actually, she might legit be dead considering that scream. That sounds like the noise someone makes as their organs are fried by high intensity radiation. Not too mention the MASSIVE BURN MARK on the back wall there.

Either way; GET FUCKED BITCH.

Very dramatic, Emerald, but really, come on. Penny has lasers. You would get maybe one more shot (from a weapon that has, at best from my viewpoint) a caliber equal to MAYBE a 9mm pistol. That stuff doesnt have the penetration power required.

If Penny wasn’t nice and more interested in saving Peitro...you’d be dead. Ripped asunder and Cinder made even worse. 

A pity, really, Penny has a heart. But...hey. Real girl.

I feed upon Emeralds tears though. Mmm. Simpy.

What the HELL is hitting them. Grimm?

Oh boy here we go, more of this. Like...bruh. Just set down for a bit. Always gotta be dramatic dont ya

Aww. Touching. But pointless in the grand scheme of things.

Interesting note but she puts her gloved hand on his cheek, not the one with the glove burned off. For what thats worth again.

Holy shit, that map wasnt lying. That whale’s almost as big as Atlas is from this angle. Mind you, might just be a trick of the location but it would make sense if they were afraid of a Grimm THAT GOD DAMN BIG. I was just seeing it as like, about the size of a normal sperm whale, maybe as big as the Leviathan from the series of the same name, but even that was barely 150 feet long. This things HUGE.

Nope. Pretty sure its about the same size as Atlas is long.

Also the Moon seems smaller from this angle oddly enough.

Wait is she gonna superman this fucking thing?

Okay yes, the numbers were based on distance not velocity, as Penny is pushing the stadium UP, rather than accelerating it in proper stance.

The noises she makes...huh. Glad my sister didnt walk in on those. Sounds...not like someone straining.

Hey look, its clumsy shitface McGee. HES NOT DEAD!

Note about the message; whos the chick with the eye patch next to the faunus in the back left of Ruby.

Im going to assume the first place we see the message played is the Mistral Black Market. Seems fitting for how it is, and the design matches Havens ascetic. 

OH MY GOD THE LITTLE EARED FAUNUS GIRL IN THE HOLE. OH NO. SHES TOO CUTE.

Also in that same shot we see the old Karen from two episodes ago, a mouse girl, Fiona’s mole uncle, and someone new I think. Plus the huge eared girls mom who has a fox tail. And also one of the thirsty moms and her kid maybe?

Hey, Sun and Neptune! Out in the middle of nowhere in Vacuo. So this is the first time we’ve seen it in the show. 

And Ilia’s still alive too!

Hey and Goodwytch too. No voice, of course...she got fired ages ago.

Also hey, so this is where Ironwoods been. I love how Hare turns it off before Ruby finishes. 

I will note that technically Ruby’s not wrong. Ironwood cant be trusted. But then, he couldnt before because (gestures to Atlas’s pathetic, scraggy SOFT “military” instead of THE CHAD FORCES OF...uh...) (Rapid sounds of shuffling papers and files labeled “UNSC” “Coalition of Ordered Governments” “SRPA” “GAR” and “Yukon Confederacy” fly off the table)

Several others. Yes. Lets go with that. (Accidentally bumps paper labeled “Vanguard” off the desk)

Watts is back out I see too. 

Wait wait wait. Penny’s blades operate via chips...part of her, sure. So WHY does she need wires on them? AGAIN. WHY ARE THEY WIRE FUNNELS AND NOT SEPERATE ONES.

Interestingly the inside of the one Watts has resembles a Scroll...did Peitro commender that technology?

No focusing system for the laser. No chamber for acceleration or direction. Odd.

Salem looks oddly glad for this. Probably cause she thinks this is going to spread more fear. 

And Ruby gets to the heart of the deal. You dont beat something that cant be killed. You capture it. Hurt it. BREAK IT. A sentient being can only take so much punishment before it shatters into madness and controllable fragments. You just. Need. To. Hit. It. HARD. ENOUGH. 

Additionally Ruby’s got a point there too. Salem played the shadows until this moment when everything was going her way. So...whats she afraid of.

Annnnddd thats all it takes to hijack Penny? Seriously.

Fuckin god damn useless Atlas bullshit fucking...(LONG SUFFERING SIGH OF A TECH NERD)

Hey theres Taiyang. Where’s Raven?

Wait hold on a second. She catches fire literally two seconds after she falls? You gotta fall a bit more than that for shit to start happening. WHAT THE FUCK IS REMNANTS ATMOSPHERE?! Or is it just dramatic...

Also as a small note the way the coms between her and Peitro cut off like that is accurate to reentry; during the hottest part of a splashdown, a space craft creates such a huge trail of energy behind it, rattling and burning its way down, it creates a blackout with its own passage. So based on the massive Apollo style reentry fire cone shes already putting out shes most likely going to be out of coms until she slows down orrrrrr craters into Remnants surface with the force of a meteor. 

And no. I dont think shes dead. The fact that, DESPITE being surrounded by the kind of fireball that worked its way into the fueltank of the space shuttle Discovery and blew it and its crew to bits on reentry, she was still intact...shes probably going to be fine.

Hacked, certainly, but fine. It takes more than that to finish her. Besides now that shes hacked, she has to fight Ruby. We all want that right?

Ahh good to see Winter in full armor now. Or...close to it. Im sure some of its a support rig for her injuries but I like to think this is the start of Atlas’s Specialist Weaponization Program.

Ironwood makes a good call here. Same thought process as mine.

Salutes in this world are the same as ours. Interesting. Must change that for the HKs

Annnndd of course Watts steals the busted Scroll because IRONWOOD IS A FUCKING DUMBASS

...um.

Im...not even going to COMMENT on what the FUCK this thing is that Jaunes detachment found. 

Also why is there A TREE in the tundra?

Oh, caustic. Interesting.

Mmmm. (Pause. Fingers to lips)

Thats your plan, Salem? To literally leak liquid Grimm into Mantle.

More silence.

Ladies and gentlemen...Salem is, officially, THE WORST VILLAN. OF ALL TIME.

The level of incompetence and stupidity I have seen here today completely obliterates the LAST person to hold that title, President Snow from the Hunger Games.

The amount of unnececary back door work and seecret plotting here astounds me. Shes doing this because she can, Im SURE of it. Theres no other reason.

Unless...she kows in a straight out fight, she’d have Ironwoods metal arm up to her colon in seconds. Which I wouldnt be surprised about.

Either way uh...thats it. Thats the end of the episode. 

Nice fight, at least.

See you all in Febuary!

EDIT: NOT FEBUARY, the break is a few more episodes after this

[normal-thoughts-official]

Ok so I know some people in the fandom don't like talking about Magnus' past lovers because anyone that isn't Alec everyone just turns their heads but ok listen. Your last response about Magnus and queer history my head immediately went to Freddie Mercury and oh please I would like a little more insight on how they met and their relationship. The only thing we knew was that Magnus would go to his concerts and even drag his friends along. What I would give to learn more about them.

FUCK MY LIFE anon listen idk if you fully know what you're getting yourself into by asking me this because i am literally OBSESSED with Magnus' relationship with Queen and Freddie like im literally VIBRATING rn i was answering the questions in order but i just HAD to answer this one immediately because !!!!!!!!!!!!! fuck fuck fuck i love magnus' relationship with Freddie Mercury and Queen so much you dont understand, i have already made some posts and i still plan on making a playlist of Queen Songs That Remind Me Of Magnus but anyway hell yeah let's DO this

okay so first im gonna talk a little bit about how i view their relationship. now, they probably weren't in a very serious relationship, since theres this whole Magnus Locked His Heart Ever Since Camille thing, but Magnus and Freddie have SO much in common i cant really think this was just a fling, either. so here's what i think: magnus and freddie were good friends who sometimes hooked up and that definitely had chemistry to have something special, but it never happened because Magnus never fully allowed himself to give in to it and neither did Freddie - im assuming their relationship was in the 70s, since in the 80s Freddie met his husband, Jim Hutton, and at that time Freddie also had a hard time trusting and loving. also, Magnus was already in New York, so it couldn't have been too serious. but Magnus would go around to watch their concerts and every time he would find Freddie somehow (it wasnt that hard, really, you just had to go to the local queer scene) and they would sometimes hook up, sometimes just talk and enjoy each other's company, sometimes both. that's what i think it's most likely.

but the absolutely OFF THE CHARTS amount of vibing they must have done. i dont think you fully understand - unless you're a queenie trash bitch such as me - just how similar magnus and freddie are. here's a short, comprehensive list of Freddie Mercury Traits:

Freddie was seen and stereotyped as an overly sexual, lothario, diva and inconsequential kind of guy, and to some extent he put on this facade, but in reality he was extremely closed off and insecure and loving, and this was mostly a persona he put on to protect himself

Despite that whole persona, Freddie was an extremely compassionate guy who did everything he could to help others, particularly other queer people. His personal assistant, his chef, his chaffeur, all were other queer guys (sometimes his exes even) that had nowhere else to go and were in need of a job, and Freddie was just like "oh, would you look at that, you're hired now. I'm gonna pay you, hm, 3 million" it was so. When Jim lost his job Freddie hired him as a gardener. They literally met because they were talking in a club and Freddie was all like "lets all go to my house" and brought in a bunch of strangers to his home. That's the kind of guy he was. His house was always open as well

Freddie was loyal to a fault and a little bit too trusting, and was stabbed in the back a few times. The most well-known one is P*ul, who outed him against his will despite them having years of friendship, a blow that Freddie never fully recovered from, but there were others. Despite being a shy guy and reluctant to open up, he actually wore his heart on his sleeve and this sometimes ended up hurting him, a lot

Freddie felt absolutely lonely and like he was unworthy of being loved. This is not a secret, its a common theme in a lot of his songs, the most prominent of them being somebody to love. He wanted to be loved and taken care of but at the same time wouldnt allow himself

He was also very insecure. Jim says in his book that Freddie would frequently ask him, out of the blue, if he loved him, despite the fact that they were, you know, married (not in the paper, of course, but Jim bought him wedding rings and Freddie called him his husband, so i consider them married)

He was constantly scared of being an inconvenience. When he found out he had AIDS, his first instinct was to tell Jim that if jim wanted to leave him he would understand. Jim, of course, said that was bullshit and he wouldnt leave Freddie because of that

He was a perfectionist and always wanted to do his absolute best, nothing less. He was also a creative genius as we all know

He loved cats and would bring random cats into his home constantly

He loved fashion and pretty things

He was a queer, gnc man of color

He had a pretty protective side to him; queen's bassist, John Deacon, was extremely shy and said that Freddie pretty much shielded him from the press attention, and also helped him polish his song writing skills and always wanted him to do his best. After Freddie died, John quit the showbusiness.

I mean, remind you of someone? Holy fucking shit, i nearly lost my goddamn mind when they mentioned that he hooked up with Freddie, because they're so similar in their issues and insecurities and interests it's almost meta. I don't know if that was on purpose or not, but i thank the sh writers every day for that line tbh honestly i am so blessed

Unfortunately i think they might kind of be too similar - you get two very insecure, afraid to be hurt people who kind of have a persona together and it's kind of hard to have them have a meaningful relationship. But where Freddie was shy, Magnus was extroverted and easygoing, and there were always parties (something the both of them loved) and they had enough common interests to bond over. Also, they both couldnt help but wear their heart on their sleeves, even when they tried not to. And i mean, i am 100% sure that Magnus absolutely loved Queen, because 1- who doesnt? 2- the songs are so intense and heartfelt and beautiful and theatrical and that's right on magnus' alley; 3- the lyrics just speak to him, because there Freddie was, writing about wanting to be loved and fearing to open himself up, and there was also Brian writing all these songs about seeing your loved ones die, and Roger was a domestic abuse victim - there was just so much for him to relate too. So i can definitely see Freddie and Magnus staying up awake late at night, looking at the window and talking about themselves, their fears, the personas they have created and how hard it is to break out of them, when they were alone in a hotel room and everyone else who was at the party was gone. Just the two of them, having heart-to-hearts, then sleeping, but the next day the magic was gone and they were both back to guarding themselves - also, Magnus was avoiding getting involved with mundane men, if you go by my headcanon. so there was just too much holding them back

but it was still an important relationship that helped the both of them learn more about themselves and get a little more used to opening up and allowing themselves to talk about themselves. they didnt really break up as much as drift apart - Freddie had the band and Magnus was high warlock of Brooklyn and the political tensions in the downworlder community were high. But they both got their happy endings after all - Freddie met Jim and they were together until the end of his life, and Magnus met Alec, who will be with him for the rest of eternity too because i said so :) so its all good, in the end, and Freddie will always have a special place in magnus' heart, as both an amazing human being that he was honoured to meet and someone who was really, really important to magnus and that helped him become who he is today and be a little happier and more comfortable with himself

he still loves queen and listens to them constantly. sometimes its bittersweet to think about him, but most times its just good to hear these songs that mean so much to him and think of how far theyve both gone

[hypmicscenarios]

Anime Attraction

3.K words

A/N: High School au. Fic with ichiro, you two slowly falling in love over the span of a 4 day convention and bonding over the fact that you’re closeted weebs. (So he would like tdd era ichiro) And again! I use neutral pronouns! hope you enjoy~

Day 1: You were very excited, happy, elated, every happy word in the book! This year, you were finally going to your first anime convention. Unfortunately, you were a bit of a closeted weeb. People knew you watched anime….just not your extreme obssession with it. Maybe extreme was too harsh for you case, but you were sure that would be the situation if they ever saw your room, filled with anime posters, merch, etc.However, those were all bought online or in stores….youve never actually been to a convention.

Online, you heard many good things about it, and that people there, for the most part, were friendly. You smiled as you got off the train, an empty backpack on your bag, besides essentials, inside an empty tote bag for you posters. You had planned for this for months. Saving up all the money you could from your allowances. Your wallet, besides money for the train and food to eat, was going to be completely emptied by the end of the day. Finally, you took your jacket off, revealing a ( favorite anime) anime shirt on your person. One of your favorites. You could never choose. You could talk about it for days. However….it was Under rated. It was also a bit old...and you were late to watch it, so the fandom dwindled down.

You were amazed as you saw many cosplays, a bit too nervous to ask for pictures, or even compliment them, but you hoped they received your compliments in spirit….something like that. It was….also really big and crowded. You got too into your head, overthinking a bunch of things, that you didn’t see the larger man in front of you, hitting his back.

“O-oh im sorry, I wasn’t paying attention,” you said, bowing quickly. You looked up at the man, gulping, quickly taken aback by how pretty he was, different colored eyes, red and green. It almost seemed like he was in cosplay, but he was just wearing a naruto shirt with black jeans on, a naruto headband around his forehead.

Ichiro blinked and smiled,”no need to apologize, I was kind of standing here in the middle of everyone anyway,”his eyes went down to your shirt and his eyes sparkled,”wait….thats a (favorite anime) isnt it! Whose your favorite character?”, he asked. You were taken aback about how eager and happy he seemed, but it definitely managed to make you relax a bit.

“My favorite character is [     ],”you said, stating your reasoning,”oh- sorry….I didn’t mean to talk that long,” Ichiro chuckled,”thats fine, I love them too! For mostly the same reasons, theyre kind of cool. This is my first convention so Im excited its going off to great start, thanks.”

Oh? It was his first time as well? “Its my first time too, I came here alone, I didn’t expect to be this big, theres so many people.” Ichiro nodded,”Im here by myself too, are you here all four days?” You nodded. “If you dont mind it, we can walk around together, ah! Sorry if thats a bit too forward….”,he trailed off. To be honest, Ichiro was a closeted weeb. So he had no one to talk to, let alone drag to a con. “Oh no, Um, its fine. I would like that...even though I know everyone here loves anime….”,you trailed off, the guy, whose name you still didn’t know, finished your thought,”because theres so many people conversing and being you feel like everyone already has their own cliques and you realize youre alone.”

Well. That. Yes that. You smiled,”Yeah, its that, and my nerves and anxiety.”

Ichiro stuck his hand out,”Yamada Ichiro, 2nd year high school student in Ikebukuro. Nice to meet you.”

“ l/n, f/n, also 2nd year in a high school located in yokohama, nice to meet you”m you said and shook his hand. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad after all.

Day 2:

The first day, the two of you had walked around, played games, went to panels together, learning much more about each other. You agreed to meetup at the same place in the morning. Of course, you were even more excited than you were yesterday. You were dressed in more casual clothing, but backpack was now decorated with buttons you found. Soon, you heard your name being called out and waved your hand,”Good Morning Yamada-san”, you said, greeting him.

Ichiro smiled and spoke,”Morning! Did you sleep well?”, he asked.  You shook your head in disagreement,”I barely got any sleep, I was excited for today.” Ichiro laughed,”so did I, so what should we do today?”,he said, taking out the convention program guide. “Hmmmm, theres a bunch of panels,”you said, going to the side of him and looking at the program,”how to successfully master naruto hand signs….”,you trailed off. They really….had a panel for everything.

Ichiro’s face lit up,” that sounds cool, want to go? Although I already know a couple…”,he said, and you laughed,”what? You going to become the next hokage Yamada-san?”, you teased a bit, but he went along with it, of course he did. You found out about this from yesterday. That he was like this. “I am gonna be next hokage, just believe it!”, he said.

“Thats naruto’s punchline you cant just steal it,” you said, watching Ichiro as he thought, then spoke again, very excitedly,”Im going to be next hokage, because I said so!”, he said, putting out a thumb. For some reason, it had you laughing a lot,”b-bbecause you said so? Ahahaha, well, you sure have a passion like naruto, I think thats all you need, its cute”, you said, realizing that you had just called the other cute.

Ichiro blushed and put his hand behind his back,”Sorry...I just cant be like this a lot in real life without getting teased for it, so its a bit refreshing,”he said and you nodded,, understanding completely.

“Well, lets go learn some jutstus even though they wont help against a gun but who cares, because its an anime convention, and we’re doing what we love,”you said confidently, more confident than you would expect from yourself.  Ichiro nodded,”Dattebayo, lets go!”, he saidm turning around and walking. You were really having too much fun. Being attracted to him went way over your head for now, simply enjoying the time the two of you spent together.

Later on in the day, the two of you found an anime photo booth, Ichiro dragging you by the arm towards it,”for memories!”, he said. The two of you got in and hit the naruto theme poses. Of course, you indulged him, he was cute when he got his way. And, you didn’t have to worry about poses. Instead, they gave you poses to do.

The first was a naruto sign for any jutsu, the second peace signs, the third you had to stick your tongues at each other, seeming annoyed, and the last one….got you. It was only a hug, but they way Ichiro hugged you quickly and tightly, pushing both of your faces together, eft you shocked, and you were sure the picture didn’t turn out well. Once you got out and looked at it, Ichiro pointed to last one,”its like you were trying so hard not to blink, but we’re cute, arent we?”,he said and you laughed:yea we really are”, you replied, more focused on the current pace of your heart...beating very rapidly. You paid for two copies so you could keep it. The rest of the day, you two kept up your shenanigans. It was tough leaving, but you were going to come back tomorrow and, hopefully, your heart would learn to behave.

Day 3:

The two of you sat down to eat lunch on the third day, already having gone through a couple activities.

“Theres Jiro, then theres Saburo, and Saburo is the oldest. We’re all pretty close but Saburo and Jiro always fight a lot, typical sibling stuff…..and a lot of the times it includes me. I keep telling them I dont have favorites but they never listen,”Ichiro sighed with a smile on his face. It wasn’t an exhausted sigh though, he was used to it, it was just how they worked.

You smiled as he rambled on about his brothers. It was very clear that he cherished the both of them dearly and would do anything for them. “That must be nice….Im an only child so I could never relate to these type of things. Thats why I got into anime really, theres was no one that I could play with at the snap of a finger if I wanted to-oh Im not sad about it or anything, I love anime, it was really there for me in trying times, plus the internet.”

Ichiro nodded and then spoke,”Well, you have me now too, and you can be as passionate as you want, no holding back. You have my number now and its already fun texting you when we’re not at the convention.”  He was right. After you guys left, you were quickly texting each other at home before you went to sleep. You sent each other memes,pictures, and talked about a bunch of different topics, that often you had smiling or laughing at your phone.

At that point….you knew had a crush. It was only two days but he was just so…..it was the little things really, not just the fact that you had anime in common. When you were walking through the convention center, going through a massive crowd, he told you to hold onto his jacket, so you wouldn’t get lost. Or how he quickly offered to help hold your stuff when you were buying merchandise. Or even him talking about how much he loves his brothers. Rather than weird, it was insanely cute to you.

It wasnt love per say…..well. Lets be real. You were a sucker when it came to love. Honestly, you dont even feel like counting how many crushes you had but none of those ever came to fruition.  You should just focus on your anime boys but the moment some other boy is even the slightest bit kind to you, like helping you carry books, your heart falls. Despite that though, you felt like this was different. More than just a couple simple acts of kindness.

“Im really enjoying our time here, we’re going to the cosplay masquerade today right? We still have some time to kill, want to go to the game hall?”, you asked,”then we can see which one of us is better at dance dance revolution.” Ichiro smiled and nodded his head,”Yeah! Youre on!”

After that, the two of you managed to spend all of your time in the hall. Ichiro was by a claw machine and you commented,”I suck at these things,”then looked inside, seeing what plushies they had. “I think im pretty decent,”Ichiro said, walking up,”sometimes I won stuff for saburo when I was little...he grew out of it though,”Ichiro said with a laugh.He wanted to try it.

“Good Luck Yamada-kun!”, you said, cheering him on. You were amazed by how focused he looked. “Do you want anything specific?”,he asked you. “Wait, me?”, you said, trying to clarify. Ichiro laughed,”I think you’re the only l/n here,”he said. That...kind of caught you off guard. But you walked up and placed your hands against the glass. “Ummmm, that cat in the middle is kind of cute.”

Ichiro nodded. The first time, he managed to pick the plushie up for about three seconds before it fell, but that was better than what you could do! The second time, he managed to grab it again, your eyes wide in anticipation as you followed the claw and plushie to the drop off slot. “Oh my god, you did it!”,you said, going to high five both of Ichiro’s hands but, instead of letting go, he held them and put them down,”Yeah I did! Guess I didn’t lose my skill after all.” “Yeah...youre amazing”, you said, trying to not comment on the fact that he was still holding both of your hands. God….your heart was a mess. There was no denying you fell for him. At most, it was very high like at this point.

Day 4:

Ichiro was excited to see you again. Well, half-excited and half-sad. He really liked hanging out with you. More often than not, he found himself thinking about how you look best when theres a smile on your face. So, he always did dumb things to make you smile, no matter how stupid it may have looked. Maybe it was because you didn’t think his obsession was weird. When you guys talked, your interests lined up more than he thought they would. It was perfect.

Of course, he eventually figured out that he’d want to see you, in a more romantic context, that it is. He knew his feelings towards you were different. Honestly, he even weirdly got a little bit jealous when you mentioned how hot a specific anime character was. Ichiro didn’t necessarily plan on confessing that day….but who knows how things would turn out. Yes, it had only been three days, but he felt like he knew you already. Really, you guys always messaged each other.

The conversations would go dull for an hour or so but one link to a meme and that sparked a conversation that continued for a while. It was great. He had never felt so validated.

“L/n-san! Hey, morning!”,he said as he walked up to you. You looked like you were thinking hard about something, but Ichiro didn’t comment on it.

In fact, you were. Thinking about how you wouldn’t be able to see him so frequently. It made you….sadder than you expected. Granted you could travel to see him, but it was also due to the fact that it was the last day of the convention. Here, you could be yourselves without glancing over you shoulder every couple seconds in fear that someone you knew would spot you.  It was so much fun, especially because of him!

Its for the best though….your funds were just about dried out. You couldn’t help but smile as you saw him though,”hey, good morning to you too, ready for the last day?” Ichiro laughed,”Yes and No because this has been very exciting.” You nodded in agreement,”it has, it does suck that we cant experience this everyday.”

“well!”,Ichiro clapped his hands,”lets not worry about that and focus on having fun, okay?” Your smile got wider,”yes, okay!” Ichiro spoke,”Datteba-”, then he pointed towards you,”Yo!”, you said, the two of you giggling. This had become your thing now, apparently, but you two werent used to it, hence you laughing off you embarrassment.

You went to the artist alley and exhibit hall one last time, taking a lot more pictures together than usual, even with cosplayers! Ichiro helped you out a lo with expressing that you wanted pictures with them and that was yet another thing that you loved about him. Without even asking him to do so, he just did it on a whim, and that made you incredibly happy.

A bit later, it was closing ceremonies. It wasnt much really, but anything to just spend even a little more time with Ichiro. However, that ended sooner than you expected. And you didn’t know what to do with yourself.

The two of you sat outside on a bench.

“So, I suppose this is it…”,you said. You had to get back early today anyway. Yet, you really didn’t want to. You looked up as Ichiro spoke,”no, its not it. We still have each other’s numbers, we can make it work, I-well….these past few days have been really fun for me,”Ichiro blushed, placing his hand behind his neck. Was he going to confess? If he didn’t do it now he knew he’d procrastinate on doing so forever. He didn’t necessarily have to make sure you were his in this exact moment, but his heart wanted an answer as soon as possible, before he got in too deep.

“The thing is….I want us to be more than just friends. I just….the more we talked, the more I found myself drawn to you. Like I can tell you anything. Its really easy to be myself around you, l/n, I want...to get closer. So, would you go out with me? Or not now, I mean you can think about it but...yeah.”,he said, face blushing. He had only confessed once in his lifetime and that was during elementary….he was quickly shut down.

You….couldn’t believe your ears. Did you really manage to find someone who was interested you at an anime convention. Well, you were sure there were more interesting stories but this was still way out of your league. You even thought he was way out of your league.

“I….we can date. I feel the same, about you, I like talking to you. And I think whats making me so sad is that I cant see you...not the convention part,”you said, looking towards Ichiro and seeing his grow excited. He grabbed your hands quickly and held them,”really?! Thats great.”,he said, letting go than hugging you. Oh. This was happening. It took you a couple seconds to process the hug before you reciprocated it.

Ichiro pulled away, looking down at you, a smile on his face,”when I talk with you, I feel like the happiest and luckiest man in the world. I know love is too strong of a word right now, but I want to do my best to make you happy.”

You were so flustered that you made no response, even more so when you felt his hand on your cheek and saw him leaning in. It all happened quickly. You closed your eyes and suddenly his lips were on yours. No movement, but it lingered for a moment, before he pulled away.

That was your first...kiss. You didn’t mind that it got taken by him but still….it was so much to process. Ichiro brought you back to reality,”Ikebukuro isn’t too far from Yokohama on the train, maybe we could meet in the middle on weekends, or switch up, ah, well I guess we can talk about this letter, getting ahead of myself,”he said and chuckled, which only prompted you to let out a soft laugh. He was like an eager puppy that you wanted to pet. Weird how he so easily calmed your nerves by the sounds of your laughs.

“Datteba-”

“Yo!”

[oswednesday]

oh opps let me not put this under a readmore at all

battle 1

(ability: forewarn, moves: psychic terrain, calm mind, imprison, future sight)

(it was a gift, like most starter pokemon, right)

(ability: regenerator, moves: reflect, light screen, snatch, recovery)

(im trying to give his team a floaty feeling that isnt just me being like see! see i can use stat boost moves in my fantasy competitive pkmn)

(psychic/dark)

(ability: shadow tag, moves: miracle eye, dark pulse, psybeam, heart stamp)

(hey im going to make this thing half dark type its literally a gothic lolita fggh, its old moveset is so much better why’d they nerf this thing so hard? it has fun like dark diva like moves between like being nice moves its fun?? they kinda keep it in swsh but not as back to back plus no feint attack,)

(he gets a lot of pkmn cause hes a rich kid)

(ability: healer, moves: quash, life dew, play rough, endure)

(despite being the chairmans kid, he doesnt have the crowd support as say marnie, mostly because his battle style isnt flashy and he says unpleasant thing, like, its a weird combo its one thing to talk trash and have explosive moves and its another to, not)

 ( if you read him as just spoiled it doesnt make sense that he’d pass autographs up imo, but i read him as not use to positive attention hes like shifty and avoidant, but he does have his fans, his team is cute after all! but i think hardcore fans of the game might also be like dubious the legitmency of a chairman backed trainer rather that super pumped up about it, idk trying to make sense of why he wasnt cold bopping like gary oak and imo its cause hes super shy and his team isnt like flashy its soft without the e-boy status, like its hard to maintain that fake gucci persona without huge breakdowns and temper tantrums, thats my read anyway)

(i realized im writing more for him than i did for marnie but i didnt want to spoil marnie plans but nothing about bede stuff changes fundementally, just that hes lowkey happy at the end and not making an emotional scene be a bad joke sdsfg)

(this battle is the challengers getting a rank an motorstoke! hes ranked 2nd place, much to his chagrin obvi)

--------------------

battle 2

(no changes to the first one cept a bit higher level, this format im doing the rivals feels like, not the most effeciant but its what i ended up doing for hop cause i tweak his team like every battle to fit the canon a bit more) 

(again no change! i could evo this one in this time frame, but im keeping the progression canon like, it was so well done in game for once it really feels like you grow with bede and a completely theme coherant team instead of like theme gimmick and just same type, it shows off how varsitile pkmn can be in character writing)

(ability: pastel veil,  moves: morning sun, heal pulse, agility, horn drill)

(this battle happens in the mines still!)

----

battle 3

(ability: regenerator, moves: reflect, pain split, snatch, recovery)

(ability: shadow tag, moves: miracle eye, dark pulse, psychic,heart stamp)  

(moves update: quash, brutal swing, play rough, psybeam)

(i think this battle actually happens just a little after rose is like [pretends to forget bebe’s name] like comic reasons theres less logic behind a battle and then the murual scene continuing; the lateral violence of it all)

----------------------

battle 4

(ability: forewarn, moves: psychic terrain, calm mind, stored power, healing wish)

(ability: dancer, moves: revelation dance, teeter dance, quivering dance, lunar dance)

(this line is so popular youd think they’d update it with some interesting moves? oh oops lunar dance is cresselias signature move, but like, im sure she wont mind, besides that has nothing to do with her role in the story and is in dire need of a cinematic update like, maybe, she needs like anti nightmare like moves like if user is asleep both pkmn gain hit points,cause lunar dance is just a renamed like healing wish basically ddfg)

(ability: regenerator, moves: reflect, heal block, snatch, recovery)

(i was soo big mad when they cut this and replaced it with a mawile like bede??? its not even his colorscheme out of all the fairys to have picked!!)

(aside note the shiny of this is really pretty!)

(i like the sudden pop of green he gets on his team instead of being jarring its like he picked something complimentary? but if i do go shiny that dancing onion will be shiny too omg its sooo hard cause the added pop of different color makes me read it as like a thing he thought about, like his aesthetic, but maybe the blue would look just as nice? maybe ill do his team side by side and do a poll gfdgf)

(ability: shadow tag, moves: miracle eye, heart stamp,foul play, future sight)  

(like im using future sight elsewhere as like story telling but this is like, before hand these humany shaped ones had aggroy attacks and now they have more like ones that play up their concept, like reflecting bede’s state?)

(ability: pastel veil,  moves: morning sun, heal pulse, glitzy glow, horn drill)

(i thought about just keeping the same moves like, but it could probably know its signature move)

(moves update: lucky chant, sparkly swirl, night slash, dazzling gleam)

(i wanted to give her life dew again, its such a nice move! but maybe lucky chant rounds out the witch vibes? also did you know night slash is called crossroad killing???? thats so cool i might call it that in comic but night slash has just as god a witchy vibe)

(the championship cup!)

[distractedhistotech]

Ghost +1

Sydney was in the back of the van.  She preferred it back there since she could move around more.  Plus it felt weird staring out the window since losing her eye. She guessed it was the loss of depth perception.  She was still learning how to gauge distance.

“So, that was kind of lame.  Why did they think that guy was a ghost anyway?” asked Sydney as she tried to contact juggle some balls they had and dropped them all over the place.  “He didn’t even put a lot of effort into his costume.”

“They were really superstitious,” said Arthur.  “Only a few steps from being a cult when you think about it.  They decide that anything strange has to have a supernatural or spiritual cause.  Don’t even think there’s a scientific explanation because why couldn’t it be something that proves they’re right.”

“Arthur, you’re starting to ramble,” interrupted Vivi.

Arthur blushed. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine. They were a bit…extreme,” admitted Vivi. “I can see why it would upset you.”

Mystery decided this was a good reason to lay his head on Arthur’s lap.  Sydney then flung her arms around him.  “Yeah!  I thought they were creepy too!”

“Sydney!  I’m driving!”

“Pretty sure they thought I was an idiot,” continued Sydney.  “I mean that tone they used with me was just insulting!  Just because I’m missing an eye doesn’t mean I’m an idiot! Lots of people are missing parts and are smart!  I’m not a pirate!”  Sydney paused.  “Actually, there were some pretty intelligent pirates.  I don’t know where I was going with that.  I seem to come back to pirates a lot lately.  I know why I do, but it’s getting kind of old.  I need to find something else to obsess with when I get riled up.”

“You could go back to talking about comics,” suggested Vivi.

Sydney sighed. “Yeah, I miss that…Why do I have so much trouble bringing comics up nowadays?  It used to be second nature, but now I have to focus to talk about them. Even though I still love comics. It doesn’t make sense.  Is this part of growing up?  Part of recovering from a traumatic event?  Both?  It feels like something’s wrong.  But isn’t that normal now?”  Sydney rested her forehead on the back of Arthur’s head, not noticing how hard he was gripping the steering wheel.  “Do you ever feel like that?”

“Yes,” said Arthur. He’d felt like it since he woke up in a hospital missing an arm, missing a friend, missing memories, missing so much… “I don’t think it’s gonna go away.” Mystery let out a whine and licked one of Sydney’s hands.

Vivi looked between the two as the mood quickly started to darken.  God, she just wanted her two friends to be happy like they used to be. She needed to find a way to change the subject and make them smile.  “Why don’t we pick up a couple of pizzas or something and then watch a couple of hours of Star Trek or Star Wars or Captain America?”

Arthur caught on to what she was trying to do and smiled.  “That would be nice.  It’s been a while since we hung out.”  He frowned. “That’s my fault.”  He’d been busy looking for Lewis.  He was trying not to ignore his remaining friends, but it was hard when he wanted to find the other one and mentioning him did…something to them.

“What the heck are you working on anyway?” asked Sydney.  “You’re not usually this secretive.  You’re not trying to make a mechanical eye again, are you?”

“No!...Not usually anyway,” admitted Arthur.

“I can see where he’s coming from,” said Vivi.  “I don’t think we can buy another eye if something else goes wrong.  We need an alternative method.”

Sydney shuddered. “Okay, point taken.  Being blind sucked.  I don’t know how someone can live with that for a lifetime. Especially if you’re born like that! Can you imagine never knowing colors? And I bet light doesn’t make a lot of sense either.  And you can’t play videogames!”

“Can’t work on cars or fabricate parts,” continued Arthur.

“Probably can’t paint either,” mused Vivi.  “Unless the various colors smelled different from one another.”

Sydney wrinkled her nose.  “Is-Is that a thing?  And I don’t mean synesthesia!  Can blind people have synesthesia?  Or deaf people?  Or anyone missing one sense?”

“What if sounds are linked to smell instead?” suggested Arthur.

“Can that happen?”

“Dunno.  Maybe.”

“Pigments are just a type of chemical compound, so it would make sense for them to have a scent,” said Vivi, keeping the conversation from veering off in a completely different direction for once.

“Depends on the chemical.  Some don’t have a scent, or at least the scent is too faint for humans to pick up on,” explained Arthur.

“I dunno, I swear I was smelling more right before you fixed my eye,” argued Sydney.

“It’s not quite the same thing.  When you lose a sense you pay more attention to the ones that are left, like reassigning roles.  We get the most information from sight, so when someone loses their sense of sight they pay a lot more attention to little things that they didn’t even realize they were ignoring.  Also, I think there’s some neuroplasticity involved.  Your brain isn’t using the part that used to be for putting together what your eyes saw, so it starts using it for other things over time.” Arthur was silent for a moment. “Um.  But you, uh, would know better than me, given, you know.  Sorry, I got a little too into the science papers I’ve been reading.”

Sydney smiled and shrugged.  “It’s fine. I think it’s pretty interesting, even if I don’t understand all of it.”  She tapped her eyepatch.  “Does losing an eye affect how much of my brain it uses?”

“Just one?  I’m not sure.  You are seeing less…”

“Can you still smell and hear more than you’re used to?” asked Vivi.

Sydney shrugged. “Dunno.  I don’t think so.  Was kind of distracted at the time.  Plus, everything looked different when I could see again.”

Vivi huffed. “It is just so unfair.  How is it that my abilities still haven’t manifested but my half of the eye lets you see spirits?”

“It is really strange,” agreed Sydney.

“Maybe it’s because your abilities are already active,” suggested Arthur.  “And you do have some control over ‘em.”

Vivi hummed in thought.  “That might be it.  There are still so many unknowns…”

“Hey, I don’t care how as long as no one else has to go blind,” said Sydney.  “Besides, I’m sure something will wake you up eventually.”

“Yeah, but what if I’m like 40 when it finally happens?” complained Vivi.  “Heck, if I have kids by then, they might have gotten their power before me…”

Arthur winced. “Do you want kids?”

Vivi nodded. “Of course!  One, maybe two.  I just have to find the right guy,” she said, giving Arthur a significant glance.

Arthur missed said glance entirely as he was distracted by thoughts of what could have been. Sydney was blind on that side. The only one to notice was Mystery, who huffed.  Why did life have to be so difficult for these kids?  The last time he’d had charges this prone to trouble…

It hadn’t ended well. Mystery would rather not dwell on the depressing memories.

Vivi realized her hint had gone over their heads yet again and decided to just move on.  “Do you guys want kids?”

“I want one!  So there can be a Sydney Scoville III!” proclaimed Sydney.  “But just one.  Don’t think I could handle more than that.”

Arthur was silent. Lewis wanted kids.  He’d be an amazing father with how well he handled his sisters.  “I dunno if I want children.  I don’t want to pass on any of my issues.”

Vivi and Sydney both frowned at Arthur’s reasoning.  “Most of your issues are due to your early upbringing,” pointed out Vivi. “You wouldn’t make those same choices and mistakes.  That would prevent most of those issues from happening.”

“They could still pick up the behavior from me,” argued Arthur.  “There’s only so much that I can change.”

“I don’t think you need to change,” said Sydney.  “I mean, yeah, you’ve got anxiety issues, but lots of people do.  You’re also smart and nice and help people and have cool hair and stro-”

“What if I attract something dangerous?” interrupted Arthur.

“Then I’ll just keep living nearby,” reasoned Sydney.  She’d live with him if he asked.  “I mean, I don’t see why I would leave Tempo.”

“Me either. Tempo is our home,” agreed Vivi. She placed a hand on Arthur’s flesh and blood hand.  “We’re stuck with each other.  For life.”

Arthur felt himself cheer up a bit at that.  He gave Vivi a smile and tried to give Sydney one as best he could.  Maybe he was being selfish, but he wanted to stay close to his friends.

And then the dashboard started to spark.  Arthur’s eyes widened.  “What?! No, no, no…”  He stomped on the gas several times but failed to pick up speed.

Vivi frowned. “Is something wrong with the van?”

“There shouldn’t be! I just performed maintenance on it!”

Sydney raised an eyebrow.  “Am I the only one who thinks the purple sparks were weird?”

Arthur blinked. “Purple?”

Sydney nodded. “Yeah, I was staring right at the dashboard.”  The high beam light looked like a jellyfish.  “Definitely purple.”

“That is not a thing that should happen!” shouted Arthur.

Vivi nodded. “Electricity’s supposed to just be white, which suggests this isn’t normal.”  The van came to a stop right in front of…Vivi blinked several times.  “A dancing mansion?”

Okay, it wasn’t actually dancing.  However, it was sort of pulsing/bopping to a beat that one could fell in their bones. It was noticeably run down and purple and had eerie lights in the windows.

“There’s no way that’s not haunted,” deadpanned Sydney.

“Erm…”  Arthur tried turning over the car again.  “We don’t, have to investigate, do we?”

Vivi thought of what happened last time they’d jumped into an investigation without any preparation.

Blood. Hospitals.  Loss.  Guilt.

“If you can get the van started, we’re leaving,” said Vivi.  “Sydney, you’re not wearing your suppressor?”

Sydney shook her head. “Still practicing controlling it on my own.”

“Good.  Don’t reign it in.”

Mystery just stared at the mansion.  He recognized its aura.  He could barely believe it.

When did Lewis come back and what did he have planned? 

Lewis was planning to exact his revenge.  The plan had been simple:  Create a mansion on a road that they often traveled along near Tempo (He couldn’t get into Tempo, but that could be because of some of the wards Vivi had tried setting up.), lure the Mystery Skulls (especially Arthur) into the mansion, separate them, bring Arthur to his location, kill Arthur, and reunite with the girls and Mystery, with possible minor changes as were needed.  He was also open to making Arthur confess what happened to the girls (They must not have seen what happened to just go along with him.) before killing him.

The plan started to unravel as soon as the van came to a stop in front of his mansion.  Part of that was because instead of rushing into the mansion on the heels of Vivi like he was expecting, they stayed in the van. And stayed.  A lot longer than he recalled them ever doing so when he was alive.

Part of it was indirectly Sydney’s fault.  He’d known that her aura was potent against malevolent spirits and the like, but he hadn’t really appreciated it until he felt it pressing down on him.  From all the way outside.  He found himself rubbing his temples.  Ow.  No wonder the nastier spirits went out of their way to avoid her.  He was actually leaking some energy.  He could last for some time as long as he was careful, but theoretically, they could just stay in the van until he was too drained to keep them here.  If they tried that, he’d have to go out and confront them.  Not something he wanted to do, but if it became necessary…

Lewis wondered why he was being affected in the first place.  He wasn’t evil…Well, okay, he did want to kill Arthur.  That was justified, but maybe it was gray enough for Sydney’s ability to categorize him as malevolent.  If that was the case, then it would probably stop after he killed Arthur and no longer had any desire to hurt someone.

Lewis was dragged from his musings as several figures started exiting the van.  Finally!  Lewis quickly started setting up the finishing touches of his plan.

It was time to end this. 

Arthur had to admit defeat.  “I’ll need to look under the hood, and I don’t want to do that in front of a haunted mansion.”  He sighed. “I don’t wanna go inside either.”

Sydney had been staring at the mansion the whole time.  She could see the music.  And anger. This eye was so weird.  “I think you’d be okay.  Pretty sure my aura will reach that far.”

Mystery could confirm that her aura did extend that far and would retain enough potency to be effective. Not that he could tell them, but it was certainly a weight off his shoulders.

Vivi started handing out various items for protection and fighting.  “It’s a tough choice.  Stay out here alone but relatively safe or go inside with us to stay close to Sydney and me.”

Arthur groaned. If he was less worried about the girls’ safety he would stay outside, but he couldn’t help but worry that if he let them go inside that he would never see them again.  It had happened before.  Even if he couldn’t do anything to protect them, he could draw fire away from them.

“I think I’ll go with you guys,” Arthur decided.

Sydney and Vivi studied him for a moment before Sydney suddenly bit her thumb and smeared some blood in the center of his forehead.  “Just in case.”

Arthur instinctively looked up with crossed eyes for a moment.  “Uh.  Okay. I guess that’ll work.”

“It should. There is power in blood,” said Vivi as she gave him some holy water and slipped a beaded necklace over his head and under his shirt.  “We can try practicing making protective symbols with it too.”

Sydney chuckled. “Like an anime.”  She nodded.  “Anything that you think will help.”

Arthur fought down the urge to wipe at the blood on his forehead.  “Can I just say that I don’t like having other people’s blood on me?” It brought back bad memories.

Sydney winced. “Oh.  Sorry.  Should’ve asked first, shouldn’t I?”

Arthur took a deep breath.  “I’m fine. I’ll be fine.  You said it might help so it’s something to try.”  The blood itched on his forehead.  “But I am totally scrubbing it off when we get out of here.”

Vivi nodded. “Sounds like a decent enough compromise.”  She handed an ofuda to Sydney.  Sydney smeared some more blood on the back of it.  “I don’t want either of you getting hurt again.  You’re just starting to get back to where you were before.”

That made both of them wince.  The last few months of learning to live with new handicaps had been difficult and frustrating in several ways.  They didn’t want a repeat with themselves or Vivi or Mystery.

All four of them silently vowed to protect the others.

The walk up to the mansion’s front door took just a few seconds.  Vivi knocked on the doors (She was concerned that the inhabitants would be excited by Arthur knocking and see Sydney knocking as a declaration of war.), which creaked open ominously.  The inched in, the doors slamming shut behind them.

The darkness didn’t last long enough for them to pull out flashlights.  Several purple wisps of fire floated by and lit candles lined along the walls and set on a chandelier.

Vivi absently noted that the layout kind of reminded her of the Spencer mansion, except a lot more purple.

“Sydney, stop humming.”

“Oops.  Didn’t notice-”

Several purple ghosts suddenly popped up.  “Who-o-o-o-oa!”

Most of the group immediately tensed up.  Vivi didn’t immediately though.  “Cute!”

They really were adorable…until more popped up behind them.  “This time I might just disa-Who-o-o-o-who-o-o-oa!”  They suddenly got pointy toothed with claws. “Oh yeah!”

Nope.  They took off running down the hallway through break in the ghosts.

“This time I might just disappear!”

A suit of armor suddenly lunged towards them and swung an ax.  Sydney and Vivi dove under the ax.  Arthur vaulted over it.  Mystery barely dodged it, having to use his kitsune magic to retract his head into his body.

“Gah!”

“Mystery!”

“)%$*&$^#$(%^)*%(&%*&$&!”

Mystery popped his head back out before any uncomfortable questions could be asked.

“Who-o-o-o-who-o-o-oa…”

They abruptly realized that the paintings lining the hall were moving.  They suddenly leapt out.  “Oh yeah!”

The Mystery Skulls leapt into each other’s arms.  Thankfully, the portrait spirits pulled back into the paintings.  “Who-o-o-o-oa…”  And then the lady painting reached out and pulled a rope next to her painting.

A trapdoor opened under them.  They fell down screaming, and things became bizarre, even by their standards.  They weren’t falling as quickly as they should be. It was more like they were floating.  Not to mention there were several random items in the space with them.  A few hours later, they would comment on how it was oddly reminiscent of Alice in Wonderland.

They floated past several mirrors.  Vivi was a bit confused by the fact that her reflection had completely purple eyes. From what Mystery could see in his cracked mirror they could see past glamours.  Arthur was facing away from the mirrors so he didn’t see that they failed to reflect his prosthetic.  Sydney did faintly notice this but was a bit distracted by how her reflection showed her right after her injury with her remaining eye leaking various colors from it.

Then Arthur’s fall suddenly sped up.  Vivi and Sydney made to grab him, but just missed him.  Then they noticed Sydney was falling even slower and tried to grab each other, but it was too late again.

Sydney let out an ‘oof’ and shot to her feet as she landed.  “I’m armed!” she shouted, brandishing the ofuda.  She turned around.  There were a bunch of boxes, a dusty bed with no covers, and… a mannequin in a wedding dress and holding an ax?  Sydney thought she was in the basement until she noticed some windows that she ran over to.  She felt her brain short circuit.  “How the *&^*) do you fall down into the attic?!”

Vivi and Mystery had landed in a kitchen where a pair of dagwood sandwiches were laid out on the center counter.  The two stared at them for several moments but managed to pull themselves away. “Right.  Separated…We should look for Arthur first.  Sydney can take care of herself in this sort of situation.” Her stomach growled.  Mystery’s growled even louder.  “…I wonder if it would be safe to grab a few pieces.”

Arthur landed on his ass in what was probably the basement.  He absentmindedly glanced upward in confusion (How did that work? Ghost logic was so weird.) before zeroing in on a large coffin with a skull and thorny vine design on the top of the lid.  It was beating like the rest of the house.

Not good.

The coffin slowly opened, revealing a jawless skull floating above a large body in a nice suit.

Lewis narrowed his eye sockets as he floated out and slammed his feet in front of Arthur.  He glared at his murderer, full of hate and anger.

Arthur stared in fear, unable to recognize his dead friend.  All he saw was a scary, probably powerful, likely dangerous ghost that had separated him from his friends.

Lewis broke the silence by pointing a finger at Arthur.  “Fuck, it’s you I hate the most.”

Arthur gulped and pointed at himself.  “Buh-buh-Why?”

It was a reasonable question from Arthur’s point of view.  Lewis…it did occur to him that he wasn’t as recognizable without his face.  He lit the braziers and let his hair form. “Does this answer your question?!”

No, it didn’t, but Arthur decided he wasn’t going to explain that this was a case of mistaken identity to a ghost that probably wasn’t going to listen.  He threw the vial of holy water, turned on his heel, and ran.

Lewis did recoil a bit at the holy water.  He was a fire ghost.  Water stung even if it wasn’t holy.  Then he threw it off, decided this was proof of Arthur’s guilt, and gave chase.

Arthur was in good shape (He didn’t understand how he was still so healthy when he’d been hospitalized and locked in his workroom so much for the last few months.) and used to running from scary things.  He glanced behind him and saw the ghost practically flying towards him.  No more glancing back.  He put on a burst of speed.

Oh, hey, Vivi and Mystery.  “Angry ghost! Run!”

Vivi and Mystery looked away from the sandwiches they were still debating eating.  They looked in the direction Arthur came from, threw the sandwiches at the angry ghost, and ran after Arthur.  Lewis didn’t bother trying to avoid the sandwich contents and flew right through them.

“We need to find Sydney!” shouted Vivi.

“Where is she?!” shouted Arthur.

“I don’t know!”

Mystery could feel that Sydney had ended up in the attic and was managing to work her way down. He pulled ahead and ran up some stairs, Arthur and Vivi close behind him.  They ran through a bunch of doors and rooms.

Sydney heard the racket and threw open the door of the room she’d wandered into.  “Angry Elvis ghost!”

That threw Lewis for a loop.  “Elvis? Are you kid-”  He saw the eyepatch.  “What happened to your-”

Sydney threw an ofuda at him.  Lewis yelped and pulled it off.  That hurt!

“You stay away from Arthur!” demanded Sydney.

That hurt almost as much as the ofuda.  “You don’t get it.  He-”

Vivi darted back and grabbed Sydney.  “What’re you waiting for?!”  She then dragged Sydney off.

Okay, Vivi and Sydney didn’t know about his murder.  Somehow. Maybe it was post traumatic amnesia or something.  Clearly, this needed to be remedied.  Also, why was Sydney wearing an eyepatch?  She wasn’t wearing an eyepatch for the heck of it.  There’d been scars peeking out.  He gave chase, now equally intent on telling Vivi and Sydney what happened along with killing Arthur.

He threw fire to keep Arthur from moving down a hallway.  Arthur turned and stared at him fearfully.  Lewis felt his desire for vengeance clawing up his heart.

And then Vivi and Sydney put themselves between them, Vivi with her arms outstretched as if to shield Arthur as much as possible, Sydney with her hands up as if she was prepared to fight him.

This was wrong. Vivi and Sydney were supposed to be on his side.  He wasn’t the enemy!  He just needed…Maybe…Yes.  That would work.  He willed his anchor towards them.

They just needed to see the proof of who he was, that they knew him.

The flames died down. Arthur was certain he knew the way to the front door from this spot.  He grabbed Vivi and Sydney and booked it.

Vivi and Sydney glanced back once.

Mystery made sure to take up the rear.

Lewis stared in disbelief and heartbreak as his murderer and the love(s?) of his life and (more than) best friend.

And his anchor fell and broke.

And Lewis switched to frustration and anger and despair and why did this happen to him?! Why why why?!

He screamed, pouring his everything into it as his fire erupted around him.

The living Mystery Skulls barely made it through the doors in time to avoid being burned alive. Mystery might have had something to do with it.  They rushed to the van.  “Go go go!”

Arthur revved the van. It started.  “I’m going!”

They peeled out of there.

None of them saw the figure watching them from one of the high windows.  Lewis watched as the van drove away.  He pressed down on his cracked anchor and looked at the picture inside.

It was from shortly after he and Vivi started dating.  He had an arm around Vivi, who was hugging him.  Sydney had an arm thrown over his shoulder while he used his free arm to support her.  No Arthur. The three of them were smiling and happy and whole and alive.

They could never go back to that.

Lewis barely noticed the tear running down his face as he finally passed out and returned to his anchor, the house fading around him.

[thelifetimechannel]

The Dave and Dirk log, for obvious reasons, was something I wanted to try very hard to get right. That meant although we drafted it together via msparp, as was our custom, I ended up overhauling it way more than any of our other combo walkaround logs. A few chunks did survive the transfer, though.

In other news, we’ve made a solemn pact to finish TLC over winter break, which is good because I’m running out of bonus content. Hopefully we’ll have some assets to show off soon. I’ve already seen a few; they’re very nice.  

DIRK: Hey, dude. You did pretty well out there. DIRK: Didn't even die once. DAVE: twice in a day is my max im satisfied with keeping that record DAVE: even if getting machinegunned is rapidly becoming my "thing" DIRK: Seems we each have our respective "signature deaths". DIRK: Or at least it ain't a party until I get decapitated. That sure was something we needed to do again. DIRK: Just once, for old time's sake. DAVE: well that puts the nail in the meme coffin DAVE: any time you panic someones gonna tell you to keep your head on DAVE: like keeping your hair on except you know that shit aint going anywhere its probably shellaced DIRK: That shit is bolted to the floor. Did you know I walked around with a girly-ass pink tiara on my head this whole day and had no idea? DIRK: I had no idea. Couldn't feel a thing. DIRK: And people let me do that. DIRK: Can't fuckin' believe it. DAVE: oh DAVE: i figured you knew DIRK: I am less than pleased with my Skaia-ordained divine color scheme. DIRK: But I guess I have to live with it. It's part of the team aesthetic. DAVE: you could always change DIRK: Nah, with the tiara and tights ditched I have at least mitigated the enforced flamboyance. It's bearable. DIRK: I can't be the one dude out of uniform. Couldn't bear the shame. DAVE: my outfit is pretty sick ngl DAVE: sburb knows everyones secret desire is to have a cape DIRK: Unfortunately, mine isn't long enough to also make for a good tactical maneuver. DIRK: Not gonna lie, that was pretty funny. DAVE: if nothing else my attempts at combat can provide a source of humor in our lives DAVE: but honestly id be fine if my fighting days were over DAVE: i was never into it DAVE: rose on the other hand was obviously itching to beat people up DAVE: one of those 12 year olds who wants to get jumped in an alley to work out her suppressed anger DIRK: Maybe Skaia did make a few miscalculations in dumping your asses with your respective guardians. I think you'd get along well with Roxy and her cats, make her budget her time away from the alcohol. DIRK: ...in theory. DIRK: Rose can go a few rounds with me if she wants, we still need to sort out who has the rights to document our legendary journies. DAVE: ill plan your funeral DAVE: what kind of flowers do you want DIRK: ...there's different kinds? DAVE: damn thats right you grew up in waterworld DAVE: these choices matter DAVE: allegedly theres a thing called "flower language" DAVE: whether you can actually send someone a boquet telling them to meet you in the pit i dont know DIRK: Like, I get that, in theory, different kinds of flowers exist. But I fully anticipate any attempt on my part to conjugate in the language of said plants would end in my coffin declaring my hovercraft was indeed full of eels. DIRK: Maybe it'll have thorns on it. Or it'll be like the sixteen millions tons of green bullshit covering my land and making my nose itch. DAVE: probably DIRK: Worst case scenario, I'll pick out something orange and present to a prospective love interest and it'll mean something like "my brotherly passion for you knows no boundaries, and also no homo". DAVE: my bro wouldnt go for flower arranging DAVE: or pink tiaras DAVE: he was pretty uptight about the whole rah rah macho act DAVE: probably subscribed to alpha males weekly DAVE: which is weird considering DAVE: well DAVE: youre gay right DIRK: Uh. DIRK: Well. DIRK: My symbolic quest land is not covered in green bullshit, but I. DIRK: Happen to like watching birds, if you know what I mean. DIRK: Fuck, you probably don't know what that means. Jake and his goddamn thousand euphemisms. DAVE: cant say i do no DIRK: Nobody knows what it means but Jake. It's an old time epithet for being into dudes. DIRK: He knows all the old epithets, including some I suspect he made up. DAVE: so DAVE: thats a yes DAVE: in a roundabout way that includes birds DIRK: I've never denied it. DIRK: I'm just. DIRK: Not a huge fan of the word. Why, in this world post-society, do we need to confine ourselves to labels like "gay"? Such constraints were washed away from my world with the rest of the human race. DAVE: holy shit that was such a pretentious dodge DAVE: dont let rose hear you say that DIRK: Rose can hear all she likes. DAVE: but anyway DAVE: i wasnt asking to get up all in your business like SOME PEOPLE DAVE: who are so into getting into other peoples businesses theyre basically the fucking mafia or the irs DAVE: but DAVE: it explains some stuff DAVE: but on the other hand it doesnt DAVE: the way you raised me was kinda aggressively mainstream masculine enough that it wasnt something that ever seemed to come up as an option DAVE: [describe that type of culture and mindset better later, I KNOW what i mean but im tired rn lmao] DAVE: and anything outside of that id just brush off because it couldnt apply to me DAVE: and that went for pretty much everything that went against what you wanted for me DAVE: including that DIRK: And yet, here the man was, subconsciously shrieking his desire for floppy felt dong through, DIRK: What I guess you could call his art, for want of any other applicable word at all. God, the mental images are crawling up the insides of my skull like the Exorcist child, do I want to know? DAVE: probably not DAVE: guess trying to act peak male has its drawbacks DAVE: weirdly enough troll culture is obsessively hyperviolent but doesnt give a shit about sexuality DAVE: they dont see the difference most of the time i guess DAVE: and so like DAVE: maybe it rubs off on you because in some ways that kind of makes sense DAVE: but after so long its hard to know what i feel and what it means because i spent so long ignoring it DAVE: so i guess i was wondering DAVE: if you had anything that might help with that DAVE: or if youre also trapped in this whirling screaming maelstrom of bullshit DAVE: while kinsey sits in the eye of the storm laughing DIRK: Wait, wait, wait. DIRK: You're coming to me. DIRK: For advice. DIRK: Do you know what a laughable hurricane of disaster my interpersonal life has been? DIRK: Like, in a weird way, I'm kind of honored, especially since about five hours ago you were scared shitless to be around me, but. DIRK: I'm standing here and waving my credentials in the air just to display how I don't fucking have any. My degree is a sham and my hands are empty except for a crudely scribbled on piece of construction paper. DAVE: are you suggesting theres a gay university DAVE: where you study bird watching DIRK: Do I look like a man who's been to college? DAVE: fair DAVE: but like DAVE: your friends know DAVE: how did you broach the subject there DIRK: I might as well have been dating a Yoko Ono for the devastation it wreaked on our friend group, so yeah, it was a little hard to ignore. DIRK: Compounded by the fact some smartass from Gay University was using my social circle for romance geometry homework. DIRK: It wasn't even a love triangle so much as a love roundabout. DAVE: ok but thats just because you were a dipshit not a gay dipshit DAVE: they were chill about the first part right DIRK: Thanks. DIRK: I mean... Roxy always seemed disappointed. DAVE: luckily i dont think anyones waiting in line for me DAVE: i guess im blowing it out of proportion DAVE: i dont think anyone will MIND DAVE: no one did about rose and kanaya DAVE: didnt even question the vampire bit which goes to show what our lives are like these days DAVE: like ok our outfit has vampires now DAVE: thats a thing that we have DAVE: if i say oh hey i might be bisexual theyll just say sure pull up a chair at the acronym table DAVE: the only one who might be weird about it is john DAVE: but hed be just as weird if i told him id changed my favorite color hes just like that DAVE: the only person its really a big deal for is me DIRK: Jane was a little bit like that. I'm pretty sure the only reason she had to object was because she found out the day I made a move on her crush. DIRK: It might just be growing up in a household where you're not regularly fighting for your life, and thus what genders are kissing whom has the space to be higher on your priority list. DAVE: that aint anyones priority these days DAVE: im prepared to acknowledge the concept that hey maybe everyone elses lives dont revolve around me and my personal drama or self revelations might have some merit at least as a hypothesis DAVE: when i met kid english he kept going on about how i was the most important person and everyone else was side characters DAVE: and maybe ive acted like that sometimes DIRK: Yeah, like you alone are the one responsible for everyone around you. DAVE: and maybe ive acted like i think that way too sometimes DAVE: ive been wrong about people DAVE: people i care about people i shouldve known better DAVE: i was wrong because i wanted to believe things that matched how i wanted the world to be DAVE: things that made it easier for the story i was telling myself DAVE: i dont think kid english meant to call me on it but damn DIRK: Reality is, after all, something we construct for ourselves. DIRK: I think maybe I knew that all along when I surfaced for air inbetween shoving my head as far up my ass as it would go. DIRK: Or maybe that's just what I try to tell myself in hindsight. DAVE: well if it takes a hyperactive 12 year old version of the final bosss creepy hero worship of me to make a point i guess thats not the least subtle way the universe has sent me a message lately DIRK: You want unsubtle? Let me tell you about my damn planet quest. DAVE: haha DAVE: i didnt have to do much of my quest because im invisible DAVE: thanks mom DIRK: My denizen practically sat me down like it was my life coach and growled in my ear about improving my communication skills with a guy I told to go fuck himself not eighteen hours prior. DIRK: So while I'm glad SBURB has a vested interest in me repairing my friendships, playing electroshock death DDR with him was a little on the nose. DAVE: maybe getting shot again wasnt that bad DAVE: so weve all learned our life lessons good job team DIRK: Exactly. Can we wrap this up now? Can we please go rest? DIRK: I'm so exhausted I haven't even noticed I'm still hungover. DAVE: sure thing DAVE: but if i need tips on leaping out of a closet to intimidate passerby i might text you DIRK: I mean, I can try. As long as you don't ask me for dating tips. That, I definitely shouldn't be helping you with. DIRK: Go talk to your sister for that. DIRK: ...wouldn't she, by the transitive property of siblings, also be my sister? DAVE: yeah i guess DAVE: but theres no way in hell im asking rose for dating advice DAVE: on her first date which she refused to admit was romantically oriented she got wasted in anticipation forgot to show up and then fell down the stairs DIRK: Oh my god. DAVE: she tries to look like shes got her shit together but its a lie DAVE: if you find my corpse floating on lolar in the next few hours dont let the truth die with me DIRK: Why are we like this? DIRK: Is there actually something hardwired into our DNA that predisposes us to being disasters? DIRK: But, that aside. DIRK: I won't object if it's me you come to talk to. DAVE: ill hold you to it DAVE: and if you ever want to publicly you admit you DAVE: "enjoy birdwatching" DAVE: in less vague and evasive terms DAVE: ill have your back DIRK: Thanks.

[uniformbravo]

i have too many thoughts bouncing around in my head so uhhhh im gonna talk abt shit

welcome 2 episode 43647 of my shitty slice-of-life text post series

school tomorrow i dont wanna go!!!!! !!!!!!!!!! depressions been hitting me tf up like some kind of MotherFucker n im so tired i h8 both of my classes i just want 2 lie down & turn into the floor -______________-

read 12 chapters of fma yesterday its good............. i dont love it yet but im definitely entertained so far & looking forward to getting further into it

also started reading silver spoon & it turns out the things i hated in the 1st ep of the anime didnt even happen in the manga who fuckin knew (im sorry i doubted u arakawa) so im actually enjoying the series a lot more this second time around! though that’s probably partly because i got rly attached to the protag halfway through s2 & now i get to dig out all the little signs of his low sense of self-worth on the reread so like. im having fun lol (watching him react to being told about livestock being offed for under-performing just the smallest bit again is..... so good.......)

watched all of aggretsuko today, like the original 100 shorts & the new series, it was p good! i honestly never planned to watch it bc like. i hate death metal / screaming bc it gives me anxiety & i knew this show would aggravate that but idk i heard good things about it from literally everywhere so i was like w/e im in the mood today i’ll just try it out & i blasted through it and enjoyed it v much

i think i like the shorts better than the show but that might be bc i watched the shorts first & got used to their rhythm? but at the same time i feel like the concept generally works better as little 1-minute tidbits. the show is a bit awkward sometimes in comparison but it’s a v good adaption regardless. it was interesting to see the concept executed 2 different ways at least. v fun show!

mmmmm still working on my silan portrait kind of!! i took a break for 2 days because 1. depression and 2. i was a fucking fool and played a Lot of piano on thursday so that put me out of physical commission for 2 days (honestly i was still feeling it today but i rly wanted to get back to work before it started to fade into yet another unfinished project). so yeah i got back to work on it today, and made some decent progress i think!

i mentioned in my other post that im working in clip studio paint, a program im not used to painting in, and i’ve definitely been struggling trying to get used to all these weird brushes but i think im slowly coming to an understanding and finding a technique that works for me? there’s an “oil paint” brush that’s good for blending & previously i was trying to use only that, since in photoshop i never switched to other brushes, i only used the one (hard round). the oil paint brush being a blending brush though, it’s basically impossible to lay down any new color on top of the old ones because the new color automatically blends with the old ones instead of coming out pure, so as a result all of my shading was coming out super soft and light which is not the effect i’m going for

so i found that using a different brush to lay down color first and then going in with the oil to blend made a huge difference & i was finally able to get in the darker shadows i wanted, but there was still the problem of details because like. the oil brush blends rly soft and it makes everything look kind of fuzzy, and it’s especially hard to deal with small areas for details

so today i started experimenting with a “watercolor” brush, which is basically just a normal brush with low opacity, and i’ve found it’s a good kind of middle ground between blending and carving in details, so that gave me a lot more control and is probably the closest i’ve gotten to my old painting style when i was working in photoshop

this whole process has just been rly confusing & im sure there are easier ways to go about this but i know i’ll get the hang of it eventually & get some good use out of this program, & it’s good to experiment with new tools i guess so?? it’s all good?? i’ll be honest im getting tired & this topic is kind of getting away from me uhhhh in conclusion im still working on the thing & i dont know when i’ll be done but i’m gonna fuckin. Keep at it

back to aggretsuko for a sec, something i rly noticed was the ost is?? really good????? i wanted to listen to it while i drew but i couldnt find it on yt & that’s like the extent of my music search capabilities on the internet so im p sad abt that bc that was like my fave part of the show rip

instead i listened to houseki no kuni’s ost which is fuckin beautiful ugh i finished that show a few weeks ago & it was very very gorgeous, like. weird and disjointed and a little tangential but fuck if it’s not put together in such an artful way that i can forgive all of that like what a way to create an atmosphere what a way to adapt a fuckin manga?? i tried reading the manga a bit bc lets be honest that anime ending was super unsatisfying but it just?? wasnt the same??? theres something abt the show being a 3d show and having the music to accompany its visuals & the way they did the lunarians especially holy fuck, it’s a completely different experience watching the show vs reading the manga & now im sad bc i want a s2 rly rly bad,,,;;;

anyway i didnt mean to talk abt hnk so much lol uh. i ended up listening to the op a thousand times bc god when i say the music for this show is rly good i mean it, both the op & ed are fuckin great (speaking of the ed that gorgeous animation holy shit,) along with its super atmospheric bgm just. god

as a reward for anyone who read through all this shit lmao here listen to hnk’s op it’s super good i promise

also watch the ed lmfao trust me it was a gift benevolently bestowed upon my eyeballs and now so too shall it be upon thine

anyway im fuckin tired & i think that’s all i wanted to say so like. peace

[askguyslikeus]

oh shit yall send lots of questions hoo nelly answering almost all of them under the cut ,,, im gunan try and answer more technical ones first then fun ones and ones about the mod later so u dont gotta scroll all the way to the bottom for the good deets

Hi! I'm still kinda new to the blog and I was wondering what are the 'do and do-not' kind question I should do? Because im sure theres always that one ask thats just Innapropiated, like that one of Michael 'taking advantage og high Jeremy' that was just not cool.  i got this ask a lot so ill be clear with yall. im just not a big angst fan? so sending michael asks about his anxiety nonstop and about how he had a panic attack in the bathroom over and over again wasnt that fun. usually if it pertains the musical though you should be find sending an ask about it? but sometimes i get asks that are like “jeremy ur nothing and how does it feel knowing u fucked everything up” like homie how i think its feels? how u think hes gunna react to that? i made this blog to negate a lot of negativity in my own life so i can promise u im going to be answering asks mostly positive always forever. that being said tho i sometimes get asks pertaining to a few things that ive dealt with in the past and these topics make me very very uncomfortable. dont send asks about these topics please. this is the no no list

-self harm, cancer, suicide, rape, parent death, car accidents, sudden death.

What was your inspiration for this blog? hoo boy well,,, ultimately i thought of them rooming together and got emotional and made a huge list of headcanons and was like ,,, why not run an askblog for a bit ill just abandon it after three asks lets have some fun. but somehow im still here and i got sucked in by the complexity of michael and jeremy. i know that sounds kinda silly but just, as someone who is dealing with a lot of similar things, like dependency issues and abandonment issues and depression and anxiety, having these fun functioning character to explore was such a gift for me. i believe honestly thats why im still here and doing this. being able to try and portray a healthy relationship and a healthy way of coping and growing has helped me a lot this past month and given me an outlet i didnt have before. TBH THO the main reason i made this blog if imma be real with u guys id because i didnt like the treatment of a lot of these issues in the fandom. it made me very upset to see depression used as an plot device and michaels dependency issues treated as romantic so i wanted to make a blog that had little to no angst. ANYWAYS somehow im still here ,,, gvrkjvrnkjfd sorry i rambled

honestly I just wanna say first that I love his blog and your art and you're so cool and kind!! a question would be (I'm not sure if you've answered this before or not) but is there like an on going story here, or is it mostly just answering questions with the characters set in this universe? (if that makes sense I'm sorry!) thank you, you're super awesome! ❤️  djrnjg first off thank u so much aaaa,, ive kind of answered this before but its ok its been a while since then! but um i do kinda have a story but how howdy i sure am dragging my feet. the story isn a hUGE OVERARCHING EPIC OF WOE AND THIS PERSON IS UPSET AND THIS PERSON IS MAD AT THIS PERSON its just michael and jeremy getting together. i have a plan and ive talked to a few people on how i want it to happen but ive gained like ,,,, 6,000 followers since then and im kinda nervous BUT ILL DO MY BEST but also please understand that i do this for fun for myself and if i dont get to it im so so so sorry woops

i know this has been said before but i'm really really happy w how you're handling so many aspects of their characters. i.e. michael being trans, michael and jeremy's anxiety, michael's dependency issues, and other stuff i'm too tired to think of. you made the characters have even more depth than they did in the play and i'm rly grateful for the way you're dealing w my favorite boys. (also your richjake is suuuper adorable) ahhhhhh thank u so much? i talked a bit about this on my main but im really glad people are happy with my decision on this blog because im suPER SUPER NERvous anytime i post an ask dealing with these things. (ask hachi or nate i always message them like freaking out and send them my scripts and asks and wait for them to tell me its ok before i post it omg) also like i talked about before i love,,, having these fun stoner gamer boys to explore these issues with. im honestly shocked by how many people also deal with dependency issues because when i first listened to the musical i was so overwhlemed by the song michael int he bathroom because i had never heard someone basically write “dependency issue: the song” and it felt so so so good to realize i wasnt alone in this pit of despair i fall into so easily aha. but im!! glad everyone is ok with this wild ride im on right now (also thank u so much i struggle writing rich and jake but i get so emotional cause they would TOTES call each other babe)

how come you just use sketch form for most of your drawing (sketches and uses sketch for the final result)? im ,,, not really sure what this is asking but i thnk its along the lines of why do i only sketch my answers?? and i do that because dude do u see how often i post and how lONG some of them are. i made this blog for fun and i love doing comics but i hate lineart and coloring and if i tried to churn out finished pics for every post id defs have given up a few asks in,, shrugs

I want to say I love your little comics they're so funny! How long does it take you to make a comic? Are any of them based on your experiences? Ok have a nice day!  thank you! i love my little comics too! it usually takes me anywhere from an hour to five hours if im dragging my ass or talking on discord while im drawing. it can be kinda exhausting but since i took my break ive also been like, starting long comics one day and finishing them another day which, before i would do it all in one sitting then post it hahha. AS FOR EXPERIENCE the first half of the lifeguard comic was based on real life! we were stuck stoned up there for like an hour or two? but we didnt have anyone to help us but we got down eventually!! the wendys comic is also something i did because man!! i need to compliment food workers if they do a good job!! ummmmm just like jenna i also have a friend that said HAHA BYE and moved to cali and she is also lIVING IT UP and doing really well for herself and shes very independent and shes very inspiring to me! hmm i think thats it besides i used to have movie nights with my dad all the time too except we would watch my fave animated movies and sometimes lord of the rings cause my dad loved that

What kinds of things can we NOT ask ? What kinds of things do you WANT us to ask ? i covered the what not to ask in the first question so!!! um if my askbox is open and u want to respond to previous asks ive answered for the boys that would be so so so rad. sometimes im done with a certain ask and i have nothing to add but sometimes ive got more to say but am looking for an opportunity! that being said it made me really happy that i got a lot of asks about pj? shes not going to the main focus of any more asks but!!! i was nervous to introduce her and im glad u guys like her shes fun to write. but overall just general asks i can make a big ol fun story out of so!! dont worry too much about what to ask, if its something ud ask a real person and not like “lol what if ur dad died” ur gunna be fine probably

Hi! Not a question but your blog is so sweet and refreshing! I actually really appreciate that you refuse angst, that stuff tends to rub me the wrong way in fandoms... Keep taking good care of these boys ! gggg thank u!!! it means a lot to me that a lot of people are backing me up on this! i mean if u are an angst fan there are a lot of askblogs that explore that!! so its not in short supply bmc askblog fandoms got something for everyone

Which drawing program do you use?? i use paint tool sai and my tablet is a cintiq !!

this isn't really related to the faq but that bakunawa boy reference was great I LOVE THAT FIC MAN!!! the line was originally a little diff in that ask but i changed it cause ,,,, i could,,,,

an art style question. how do you keep the design of characters consistent from frame to frame? my characters they look a lil different every time I draw em (or a lot different) and it tends to disrupt the flow of my comics/animations ohh boy hoo wee props for doing animations im too scared to give that a whirl but!! it helps that i draw all the panels for an ask on one canvas! so if my next panel is going to be the same character in the same spot just in a diff pose i keep the lower layer on just at low opacity so i can use it as a ref! that helps me a lot!

Sorry if I'm nosy or rude, but are you reflecting Micheal Anxiety, Panic attacks and depence? iii think this is asking if i reflect my own issues onto them boys? and if so then yes i do. i dont place any of my own personality or anything on the boys but i do use them as a way to help me learn how to cope with my own shit and i try to deal with their issues in the healthiest way possible while also keeping in mind they are flawed individuals aaa

what are your pronouns??? and maybe your main blog??  im a cis girl so she/her is good! and my main is squigglegigs! also that being said IF YOU SEE THE USERNAME SQUIGGLEGIGS ANYWHERE JUST?? ASSUME ITS ME?? i have a twitter and an instagram and my tumblr account 

((Hello mod will Michael and Jeremy eventually someday get together. I love them.)) if all goes according to plan yes! if i get overwhelmed and stop having fun on this blog then no! sorry thems the breaks but! i do want them to get together so HOPEFULLY

going off on that confrience on pornogrefy for birds, Im geussing jeremy has played Hatoful Boyfriend. am I wrong? well it wasnt intended as that ref and i dont know anything about hatoful boyfriend but i can see jerm finding it and playing it so, sure homie! the pornography for birds thing is a my brother my brother and me reference! i love that show and them boys so give it a scope!

I'm crying bcuz Michael said he's in love with Jeremy and it's beautiful yeah that boy is DEEP IN love with his bro bro

Any advice for running an ask blog?? (Ps i love this blog keep it up) personally whats worked for me so far is doing just sketches for art. honestly ive been able to work so much more and post so much more often while also trying to work on my expressions and poses! also taking my own experiences and shaping them to fit the characters has been SO MUCH FUN. th most important thing tho is,,, dont overwork urself dude. if ur having a fun time it shows. if ur just forcing urself to churn out material and its not fun? like shit we doing this for free dont push urself? idk idk overall being looser with my art and writing the dialogue before hand has been the most helpful for me for this askblog! ive run a bunch before including @ask-maz and ive run that sporadically for ,, three or four years? its so funny cause u can see my art style juMP AROUND SO MUCH but i love that blog and i only update it like every other month or so but?? i still like doing it and no on likes those posts but it makes me smile so ANYWAYS

~ok from here on its mostly just me replying to nice messages or people asking me personal questions that dont pertain to askguyslikeus so!!~

I just wanted to say I really really love your blog and just your art in general!! Keep up the good work and hope you're having fun! thank u!!! i am having fun and im glad u enjoy it!!

What other musicals do you like? :0  i really like heathers A LOT. i also like doctor horrible i know thats not technically a musical but i just relistened to it and im emotional. i like dear evan hansen but it makes me really sad so i can only take it in moderation! ummm rent? chicago?? music man? now im just naming musicals i was in rip. being in a musical fandom is a new thing to me? i was really into heathers last year but didnt really interract with the fandom at SO THIS IS SUPER NEW?? ive never been into a musical as much as im into bmc and heathers tho

tell us a little bit about urself!! u seem v cool i am squigs or fork!! im 24 and work fulltime as a barista at starbucks! i get high on the beach with my friend gwen a lot and drink wayy to many slushies, my tv shows are brooklyn nine nine and bobs burgers right now! i table at conventions sometimes and sell my art as merch and whatnot and i cosplay as a hobby as well. im pretty boring but i draw a lot and always carry my big sketchbook with me and im pretty sure its given me back issues BUT OH WELL HAHA also i am very not cool THE TRUTH COMES OUT

Who do you most relate to from bmc and why? like ,,, a mix of michael and christine with a sprinkle of jeremy i guess ahaha i relate to michaels dependency issues and overarching positive attitude and love of music, i relate to christines bright disposition and the need to not stick to one set thing? like she loves theater cause she can be sO MANY PEOPLE and like same homie thats why i cosplay. and jeremys need to be likes while also ability to put himself out there is very relatable. i also identify strongly with his dad issues idk idk whats good

Also -- just thank you for how you handled all the panic attack and anxiety attack asks. I used to deal with anxiety attacks multiple times a day and it just was really nice that it was positive and not them having one. Thank you, sincerely. ahhhhhh ur so welcome i,,, have anxiety and it sucks and i deal with panic attacks like everyday at work so i dont really wanna come home and draw someone having one i guess? im glad its helping other people too tho!

Dude- I love your art? Actually so much? It's... I love it. The whole sketch-ish way your art style is, and the way you color, and the expressions! I'm so glad I found your work - you've given me so much inspiration. Keep doin what you're doin and I hope you have a good day! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ANytime any one compliments my expressions i die cause i legit made this blog to help with that as well ,,, like dam

im lvoe ur art style b o i :0 !!!!!!

Mod, I love you so much I love you you have my soul and my love and my eternal gratitude thank you and I love you (This is the guy who was excited about PJ on your ig live stream a while ago and I love you) !!!!!!!!! im so happy u like my content omg and that u like pj im so glad!! shes a good bean

I just wanna say... I'm crying over that post about Michael and his anxiety? cuz I know how it can feel that you're only your flaws and weaknesses, but Michael just tells that to screw off in the most wonderful way and I'm?? thank you so much for that post, I bookmarked it for future times when I can't look past my depression... honestly, that post made my day (along with every other post on this blog), thank you for being such a lovely part of this fandom ,,,, im,,,, im scared of a lot of this fandom tbh but if i can be something good that come out of it and my love of these boys and desire to show them functioning together in a healthy way can help other people its so much more than i ever thought id ever be able to do. i am blown away everyday by the support ive been given on this blog and i might be crying right now because i never thought id be able to touch other people like this and i just. im really glad yall are here with me for all this.

(To the mod: You are a beautiful person that I highly respect. I love this blog and what you set out to do. thanks for giving something that makes me smile and gives me something to look forward to everyday, keep up the good work! ❤ ) hey im still crying from the previous ask aaaaa im honestly so emotional

what are ur true feelings for wendy's??? i fucking love wendys man thats some top tier fast food right there

what fast food restaurant do you think has the best nuggets WENDYS HANDS DOWN

do you have a favorite movie? paranorman makes me very nostalgic and ive seen it like eighty times and used to watch it with my dad a lot and i love it

I would just like you to know that your Wendy's comic prompted me to pull the same thing with a bakery in the town I'm visiting and the baker got so excited and happy, so thank you for making that comic because I made that woman's day. GOOD GOOD GOOD GOOD GOOD I LOVE WHEN PEOPLE COMPLIMENT ME WHEN IM WORKING DUDE LIKE IM SO GLAD IT MADE U DO THIS!!! IM SMILING REALLY BIG!!

chocolate milk or strawberry milk? or plain? woops i hate milk im so sorry

do u love michael mell with all of ur heart, mod?  i really truly do man what a fucking good ass character

hi squigs i love you! i love your content too and i hope u have a good day pal :>  WHAT A SWEET BEAN!!! THANK YOU?? OMG

I'm just saying that recent ask you did with Michael really hit me hard because I really related to it and I started crying because it made me realize that I've been pining my self worth on everything my anxiety causes and I'm so much more than that. Thank you, so much for that I really needed it because I'm in a really bad place right now. <3 -for the mod i legit cry everytime i get asks or dms like this cause once again the idea that im helping other people is so ovwehelming i love you??? i let myself just be”depressed” for ahwile and by that i mean i just,, let my sadness consume me and i was scared of getting better cause the sadness was all i knew for so long and just. its so easy to think u are ur illness but you are so much more. soooo much more man.

I relate A Lot to Michael so the way you portray him in the blog is really good, and I think it's really awesome you refuse to like?? do terrible stuff and answer bad questions just bc people wanna see that. You run this blog really well 👌  AHHHH THis is the biggest compliment thank u so much ,,, i get real anxious bout this blog soemtiems but then yall send me sweet things like this and its worth it man

Hey mod, just know you're a really cool person. Thanks for running this blog in the first place. Keep doing the great work.  thank you!!!! for ur support!!!! 

not really a question!! i just wanted to say your posts on this blog always brighten my day and you're really an incredible artist and person, keep rockin on my dude!! *clutching my heart* the fuck this is so sweet

1 .I just wanted to say your blog is really awesome! It's very lovely. I also like how you made michael trans and like handled it? (just with how all the characters treat him and stuff its v nice). Your art is super duper! Thanks for running this awesome blog! 2. Hey! This isn't a question but I wanted to say that I appreciate michael being trans!! As a trans boy it's just rly awesome to see something like that casually thrown into an ask blog without making it a huge weird deal :D immm,,, i kinda really love the idea of michael being trans cause a lot of my trans male friends are actually pretty confident in their skin and michael is a very confident character? and u rarely see that with trans representation and its so refreshing to see it portrayed well. im trying to do that here but again if! i do anything wrong let me know!

how did you first get into art? (also i really love your blog, it's amazing!) ive been drawing as long as i remember! ive got mad adhd and wasnt diagnosed until late in ym life so i would just draw nonstop in my classes ahaha i used to read the sunday comics a lot and they really inspired me to try and make comics of my own too!! (and omg thank u) 

someone also asked me if i went to church or was religious but tumblr ate the ask but i used to go to church a lot as a kid but im currently not religious at all aaa

ok holy shit that was a lot but thanks again to everyone i legit cry a lot about how supportive u all are thank u so much aaaa

[transient-tutor]

DEREK: -is jake hanging out in the infirmary right now? because the dad-in-law is stopping by. it's not unusual, he's been coming and going the past few days to see dirk but tonight he's here for jake. he knocks on the door to get his attention before just letting himself in.- Yo Jake.

JAKE: -MOST DEFINITELY HANGING OUT IN THE INFIRMARY. Jake is taking an uneasy doze in one of the visitor cots a small distance aways from the comatose patient room. Jake didn't want to be a cumbersome presence to any medical staff that might come in and check on Dirk's vitals from time to time. Plus, just sitting in there was making him incredibly sad.- 

JAKE: -At the sound of Derek's voice, Jake lifts his head up to squint. Feeling for his glasses and starting to roll to sit. Abeit with difficulty. The weariness wouldn't shake off his bones.- Derek? 

JAKE: Youre here? -blinks and sets gaze on his father-in-law, worried all over again.- Something the matter? Is it dirk?

DEREK: -ambles over, shaking his head and waving a bandaged hand in dismissal.- Dont worry. Nothins up. 

DEREK: -plops to take a seat beside him on the cot.- I stopped by to see you.

JAKE: -shoulders sag in relief and he sighs. The biggest dog sigh of them all. Eyeballs the bandaged hand.- Get into a scrum?

DEREK: -holds up his hand and sighs at it.- Yeah with a wall. 

DEREK: It was a lil one sided.

JAKE: Oh well... 

JAKE: Happens to the best of us. -And it does! Though Jake typically fought anything but a wall.- 

JAKE: Youre here at least... having it checked and what not. 

JAKE: Sos the responsibility. -rubs at his neck, making a bit of a face.- Bluh... 

JAKE: Sorry derek. Im... 

JAKE: A few gumptions short of a decent conversation. :(

DEREK: -claps a hand onto jake's shoulder and gives him a sympathetic pat.- No worries. Didnt really come here to conversate anyhow. 

DEREK: Sorry to interrupt your beauty sleep but I wanted to get you outta here for a lil while.

JAKE: Oh uh... -It dawns on him that he's hardly spent any "family" time with Derek. As most affairs they cross paths in were in the company of other people. Also before that, Jake got entirely distracted by dating his son.- At this time of night? 

JAKE: Where would we go? -He asks this question but he lives the married family life, Derek. Understand him.-

DEREK: -he gets it. he's been there. but he also adamantly refuses to grow up in many regards, so the world remains his oyster.- Anywhere. 

DEREK: Life aint come to a screeching halt outside. If anything its bustling more than it has in who knows how long. 

DEREK: Figured we could hop in that jeep of yours and see whats goin down out there. You up to it?

JAKE: Well its not but... -looks onward, probably in the direction Dirk's room is. Whines internally. Whines eternally.-

DEREK: -sighs through his nose. yeah, he gets that too.- Just to take our minds off things for a lil while. 

DEREK: Itll be fun. Come on. -he's not above peer pressuring you, jake.-

JAKE: -It's easier to fold when Jake imagines that Derek is telling him to go, rather than suggesting they do.- Oh... 

JAKE: Alright.. 

JAKE: But lets not be long. -pries himself off the bed, again. Reluctantly.-

DEREK: -claps him on the back before hopping to his feet again.- Thats the spirit. 

DEREK: -takes the liberty of leading the way out the door. he doesn't really seem to be waiting around for him to catch up.-

JAKE: -Well that's fine... Jake knows where the Jeep is parked and is also the only one present with a key for it. He takes his time texting his friends in the infirmary about where he's heading off to. He meets up with Derek in the cargo bay.- Ill be frank... 

JAKE: I havent thought to set foot outside since... 

JAKE: My imprisonment i suppose.

DEREK: Thats reasonable. 

DEREK: Cant say Ive had much need to. -leans on the jeep nonchalantly. he wants to drive it... but he will have to ask for the keys. use your words, derek.- But I hear its safer out there. People just rebuildin their lives. 

DEREK: And thats cool. -holds out his hand.- Anyway gimme your keys to this thing. -he did it.-

JAKE: -There's a whole second Jake is reluctant to... before he passes them to Derek.- 

JAKE: ... 

JAKE: This was our wedding gift. -blurts. He can't help it. The associations are still there.- :(

DEREK: -snatches them up, then turns towards the vehicle.- ... Yeah. -HE BETTER NOT CRASH IT THEN. he's been known to do this with cars that don't belong to him.- 

DEREK: -gets into the driver's side.- Its a good one. John got it for you right?

JAKE: -climbs in and sits in the passenger side. The sad faces intensify.- Yes. :C

DEREK: -damn, this is gonna be harder than he thought. probably not gonna be the wild night he was hoping for, but he can improvise.- 

DEREK: -produces a six pack of booze from his sylladex and holds them out to him.- Have one. -yes, he's telling him to do this again.-

JAKE: Wh... 

JAKE: -suddenly taking booze in his lap.- Were not driving under any influences are we?

DEREK: -jesus CHRIST.- Im not gonna. -for now-

JAKE: I think id have to stop you if we were sir! Family statuses aside. -HUFFS.-

DEREK: -smirks a little at him as he starts up the jeep.- Good to know. 

DEREK: But I insist. You have at it. 

DEREK: -and with that he TAKES OFF. the ship is landed somewhere out in the wilderness, but not too far from the minneapolis area still. plenty of municipalities to check out, but instead derek is taking a scenic route.-

JAKE: -dont mind if he rolls down the window. He likes the feel of the wind in his hair and especially his mustache.- Well... 

JAKE: I watch plenty of television and im sure theres a law some place that reads there cant be open beverages in a moving vehicle! 

JAKE: So im sure wherever were going it can wait. -sets the boozes down at his feet. That's that.-

DEREK: Oh come on its basically lawless out here. 

 DEREK: Man youre a real goodie two shoes. -says so with a good natured snicker. he's just trying to loosen him up... what a shame it's failing. maybe it's not in the cards. he pauses, hesitant to say what he's thinking but he's derek so he'll say it anyhow.- 

DEREK: You must keep Dirk in line then huh?

JAKE: Shucks i wouldnt go that far. -feeling his face flushing in color. Absently, Jake fiddles with the ring on his finger.- Its just... 

JAKE: Second nature i suppose? Thinking and... 

JAKE: Doing my darndest to plan ahead. -he trails off. Feeling sad all over again.- But you dont want to hear this. We um. 

JAKE: Ought to focus ahead and all. Coming all this way.

DEREK: -glances at him- Well the plan was to take it easy. Sure. 

DEREK: But now I feel like talking about him too. 

DEREK: Its nice hearin this stuff. -sobers up rather suddenly.- 

DEREK: You know were not as close as Id like to be. Me and him. 

DEREK: Guess I can kinda live vicariously through all yall that are when you talk about that sorta thing. What all is goin on in your day to day. Shit like that.

JAKE: Why not? 

JAKE: The lack of closeness i mean.

DEREK: Well... -drums fingers on the steering wheel.- He dont like me too much. 

DEREK: Guess weve been working on that but its slow going. 

DEREK: I cant blame him anyways.

JAKE: Right... -If it helped Derek any, Jake had no reason to have hard feelings about him.- I cant imagine why. My impressions always been that youre as swell a fella as it gets! 

JAKE: Whats there more to say about it? -But no really, he's curious.-

DEREK: -goes quiet for a moment but it's fine, he just scoffs.- People tell me there aint nothin left to say anymore. 

DEREK: But I wasnt always a swell fella.

JAKE: Oh... -Truth be told, he had a hard time picturing anyone as totally a bad person. Jake glances at him, a glimmer of optimism for his father-in-law.- Its a dog eat dog world im told... 

JAKE: Some folks do whats best they think is needed for survival. -looks away then, watching the passing scenery. So dark out...- I know its true for me.

DEREK: That dont always make it right. 

DEREK: But that aint somethin you gotta worry about. Youre an indisputably good guy. 

DEREK: -decides to make a turn down some dirt road.- And a great dad.

JAKE: Good... golly. Gulp.  -if it's Derek's intention to make Jake blush again, it's working. Too much positivity in one sitting, his eyes are starting to water. Jake scrubs his face with the back of one hand. There they go, down some dirt road.-

DEREK: -IT ISNT EXACTLY, but he is making extra effort to be sincere with jake.- ... -glances at him.- 

DEREK: Its true. 

DEREK: Times like these really make or break a man. 

DEREK: ... And Ill be real with you it is shit like this which made me a bad guy. I let that happen. 

DEREK: Cuz I thought I had to do it alone. 

DEREK: -drums fingers on the steering wheel.- Just remember youre not alone alright?

JAKE: I know it. Its not... 

JAKE: Me im torn all over for. -swallows hard as it turns out his attempt to curb the water works failed. Jake sits there with tears dripping.-

DEREK: -frowns at the road ahead of him. he's not the best at expressing his sympathy, not always, but it's a little easier when some of that pain is shared. he reaches over to grip at jake's shoulder for a moment.- Yeah. I get it.

JAKE: -the simple gesture of squeezing his shoulder has Jake's heart wrenching even more. The most he can do is wring out a handkerchief to blow his nose into. Jake English doesn't go anywhere without it.-

DEREK: -this poor kid... he can't believe he carries around a handkerchief though. he clears his throat to suppress a chuckle about it and retracts his hand to place both back on the wheel.- 

DEREK: I dont wanna make promises that itll be alright but... Youve got me and Riley and Dave and the whole goddamn clan to make shit easier where we can.

JAKE: -sniffles again and focuses on folding the hankerchief away. He'll have to wash this later.- Oh i know i... 

JAKE: ... 

JAKE: I feel just awful... thinking to ask when i cant even be fucking bothered to hold my own. -seems to be telling himself this more than Derek.- Ive held worse. Ive... endured worse. 

JAKE: And so has everyone else. Its... -rests his elbow just outside the window, looking out again.- Magnanimously stupid of me. I shouldnt ask more of everyone.

DEREK: -brows knit as a familiar kind of pain wrenches at his insides. how does he even begin to explain how well he understands?- 

DEREK: I know. 

DEREK: When you wanna keep it together so nobody else has gotta add you to their long list of troubles. 

DEREK: Even when you feel like youre fallin apart. 

DEREK: Its frustratin. 

DEREK: Like fuck. You should be able to handle this. 

DEREK: You got to. -grips the steering wheel tight, but when he notices they've arrived at their impromptu destination, he loosens his hold and slows the vehicle to a stop next to one of the many lakes around here.- 

DEREK: -turns to look at jake.- Youre a strong person Jake. 

DEREK: I know you got this. 

DEREK: But I aint offerin my help cuz I think you need it. 

DEREK: Im doin it cuz youre family.

[cosmicsubs]

windicksy said: by all laws of aviation the bee should not be able to fly

 its wings are too small to get

its fat little body off the ground

 the bee of course flies anyway

 because bees dont care

what humans think is impossible

 yellow black yellow black

yellow black yellow black

 ooh black and yellow

lets shake it up a little

 barry breakfast is ready

 ooming

 hang on a second

 hello?

  barry?

adam?

  oan you believe this is happening?

i cant ill pick you up

 looking sharp

 use the stairs your father

paid good money for those

 sorry im excited

 heres the graduate

were very proud of you son

 a perfect report card all bs

 very proud

 ma i got a thing going here

  you got lint on your fuzz

ow thats me

  wave to us well be in row 118000

bye

 barry i told you

stop flying in the house

  hey adam

hey barry

  is that fuzz gel?

a little special day graduation

 never thought id make it

 three days grade school

three days high school

 those were awkward

 three days college im glad i took

a day and hitchhiked around the hive

 you did come back different

  hi barry

artie growing a mustache? looks good

  hear about frankie?

yeah

  you going to the funeral?

no im not going

 everybody knows

sting someone you die

 dont waste it on a squirrel

such a hothead

 i guess he could have

just gotten out of the way

 i love this incorporating

an amusement park into our day

 thats why we dont need vacations

 boy quite a bit of pomp

under the circumstances

  well adam today we are men

we are

  beemen

amen

 hallelujah

 students faculty distinguished bees

 please welcome dean buzzwell

 welcome new hive oity

graduating class of

 9:15

 that concludes our ceremonies

 and begins your career

at honex industries

 will we pick ourjob today?

 i heard its just orientation

 heads up here we go

 keep your hands and antennas

inside the tram at all times

  wonder what itll be like?

a little scary

 welcome to honex

a division of honesco

 and a part of the hexagon group

 this is it

 wow

 wow

 we know that you as a bee

have worked your whole life

 to get to the point where you

can work for your whole life

 honey begins when our valiant pollen

jocks bring the nectar to the hive

 our topsecret formula

 is automatically colorcorrected

scentadjusted and bubblecontoured

 into this soothing sweet syrup

 with its distinctive

golden glow you know as

 honey

  that girl was hot

shes my cousin

  she is?

yes were all cousins

  right youre right

at honex we constantly strive

 to improve every aspect

of bee existence

 these bees are stresstesting

a new helmet technology

  what do you think he makes?

not enough

 here we have our latest advancement

the krelman

  what does that do?

oatches that little strand of honey

 that hangs after you pour it

saves us millions

 oan anyone work on the krelman?

 of course most bee jobs are

small ones but bees know

 that every small job

if its done well means a lot

 but choose carefully

 because youll stay in the job

you pick for the rest of your life

 the same job the rest of your life?

i didnt know that

 whats the difference?

 youll be happy to know that bees

as a species havent had one day off

 in 27 million years

 so youll just work us to death?

 well sure try

 wow that blew my mind

 "whats the difference?"

how can you say that?

 one job forever?

thats an insane choice to have to make

 im relieved now we only have

to make one decision in life

 but adam how could they

never have told us that?

 why would you question anything?

were bees

 were the most perfectly

functioning society on earth

 you ever think maybe things

work a little too well here?

 like what? give me one example

 i dont know but you know

what im talking about

 please clear the gate

royal nectar force on approach

 wait a second oheck it out

  hey those are pollen jocks

wow

 ive never seen them this close

 they know what its like

outside the hive

 yeah but some dont come back

  hey jocks

hi jocks

 you guys did great

 youre monsters

youre sky freaks i love it i love it

  i wonder where they were

i dont know

 their days not planned

 outside the hive flying who knows

where doing who knows what

 you cantjust decide to be a pollen

jock you have to be bred for that

 right

 look thats more pollen

than you and i will see in a lifetime

 its just a status symbol

bees make too much of it

 perhaps unless youre wearing it

and the ladies see you wearing it

 those ladies?

arent they our cousins too?

 distant distant

 look at these two

  oouple of hive harrys

lets have fun with them

 it must be dangerous

being a pollen jock

 yeah once a bear pinned me

against a mushroom

 he had a paw on my throat

and with the other he was slapping me

  oh my

i never thought id knock him out

 what were you doing during this?

 trying to alert the authorities

 i can autograph that

 a little gusty out there today

wasnt it comrades?

 yeah gusty

 were hitting a sunflower patch

six miles from here tomorrow

  six miles huh?

barry

 a puddle jump for us

but maybe youre not up for it

  maybe i am

you are not

 were going 0900 at jgate

 what do you think buzzyboy?

are you bee enough?

 i might be it all depends

on what 0900 means

 hey honex

 dad you surprised me

 you decide what youre interested in?

  well theres a lot of choices

but you only get one

 do you ever get bored

doing the same job every day?

 son let me tell you about stirring

 you grab that stick and you just

move it around and you stir it around

 you get yourself into a rhythm

its a beautiful thing

 you know dad

the more i think about it

 maybe the honey field

just isnt right for me

 you were thinking of what

making balloon animals?

 thats a bad job

for a guy with a stinger

 janet your sons not sure

he wants to go into honey

  barry you are so funny sometimes

im not trying to be funny

 youre not funny youre going

into honey our son the stirrer

  youre gonna be a stirrer?

no ones listening to me

 wait till you see the sticks i have

 i could say anything right now

im gonna get an ant tattoo

 lets open some honey and celebrate

 maybe ill pierce my thorax

shave my antennae

 shack up with a grasshopper get

a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"

 im so proud

  were starting work today

todays the day

 oome on all the good jobs

will be gone

 yeah right

 pollen counting stunt bee pouring

stirrer front desk hair removal

  is it still available?

hang on two left

 one of thems yours oongratulations

step to the side

  whatd you get?

picking crud out stellar

 wow

 oouple of newbies?

 yes sir our first day we are ready

 make your choice

  you want to go first?

no you go

 oh my whats available?

 restroom attendants open

not for the reason you think

  any chance of getting the krelman?

sure youre on

 im sorry the krelman just closed out

 wax monkeys always open

 the krelman opened up again

 what happened?

 a bee died makes an opening see?

hes dead another dead one

 deady deadified two more dead

 dead from the neck up

dead from the neck down thats life

 oh this is so hard

 heating cooling

stunt bee pourer stirrer

 humming inspector number seven

lint coordinator stripe supervisor

 mite wrangler barry what

do you think i should barry?

 barry

 all right weve got the sunflower patch

in quadrant nine

 what happened to you?

where are you?

  im going out

out? out where?

  out there

oh no

 i have to before i go

to work for the rest of my life

 youre gonna die youre crazy hello?

 another call coming in

 if anyones feeling brave

theres a korean deli on 83rd

 that gets their roses today

 hey guys

  look at that

isnt that the kid we saw yesterday?

 hold it son flight decks restricted

 its ok lou were gonna take him up

 really? feeling lucky are you?

 sign here here just initial that

  thank you

ok

 you got a rain advisory today

 and as you all know

bees cannot fly in rain

 so be careful as always

watch your brooms

 hockey sticks dogs

birds bears and bats

 also i got a couple of reports

of root beer being poured on us

 murphys in a home because of it

babbling like a cicada

  thats awful

and a reminder for you rookies

 bee law number one

absolutely no talking to humans

 all right launch positions

 buzz buzz buzz buzz buzz buzz

buzz buzz buzz buzz buzz buzz

 black and yellow

 hello

 you ready for this hot shot?

 yeah yeah bring it on

 wind check

  antennae check

nectar pack check

  wings check

stinger check

 scared out of my shorts check

 ok ladies

 lets move it out

 pound those petunias

you striped stemsuckers

 all of you drain those flowers

 wow im out

 i cant believe im out

 so blue

 i feel so fast and free

 box kite

 wow

 flowers

 this is blue leader

we have roses visual

 bring it around 30 degrees and hold

 roses

 30 degrees roger bringing it around

 stand to the side kid

its got a bit of a kick

 that is one nectar collector

  ever see pollination up close?

no sir

 i pick up some pollen here sprinkle it

over here maybe a dash over there

 a pinch on that one

see that? its a little bit of magic

 thats amazing why do we do that?

 thats pollen power more pollen more

flowers more nectar more honey for us

 oool

 im picking up a lot of bright yellow

oould be daisies dont we need those?

 oopy that visual

 wait one of these flowers

seems to be on the move

 say again? youre reporting

a moving flower?

 affirmative

 that was on the line

 this is the coolest what is it?

 i dont know but im loving this color

 it smells good

not like a flower but i like it

 yeah fuzzy

 ohemicaly

 oareful guys its a little grabby

 my sweet lord of bees

 oandybrain get off there

 problem

  guys

this could be bad

 affirmative

��very close

 gonna hurt

 mamas little boy

 you are way out of position rookie

 ooming in at you like a missile

 help me

 i dont think these are flowers

  should we tell him?

i think he knows

 what is this?

 match point

 you can start packing up honey

because youre about to eat it

 yowser

 gross

 theres a bee in the car

  do something

im driving

  hi bee

hes back here

 hes going to sting me

 nobody move if you dont move

he wont sting you freeze

 he blinked

 spray him granny

 what are you doing?

 wow the tension level

out here is unbelievable

 i gotta get home

 oant fly in rain

 oant fly in rain

 oant fly in rain

 mayday mayday bee going down

 ken could you close

the window please?

 ken could you close

the window please?

 oheck out my new resume

i made it into a foldout brochure

 you see? folds out

 oh no more humans i dont need this

 what was that?

 maybe this time this time this time

this time this time this

 drapes

 that is diabolical

 its fantastic its got all my special

skills even my topten favorite movies

 whats number one? star wars?

 nah i dont go for that

 kind of stuff

 no wonder we shouldnt talk to them

theyre out of their minds

 when i leave a job interview theyre

flabbergasted cant believe what i say

 theres the sun maybe thats a way out

 i dont remember the sun

having a big 75 on it

 i predicted global warming

 i could feel it getting hotter

at first i thought it was just me

 wait stop bee

 stand back these are winter boots

 wait

 dont kill him

 you know im allergic to them

this thing could kill me

 why does his life have

less value than yours?

 why does his life have any less value

than mine? is that your statement?

 im just saying all life has value you

dont know what hes capable of feeling

 my brochure

 there you go little guy

 im not scared of him

its an allergic thing

 put that on your resume brochure

 my whole face could puff up

 make it one of your special skills

 knocking someone out

is also a special skill

 right bye vanessa thanks

  vanessa next week? yogurt night?

sure ken you know whatever

  you could put carob chips on there

bye

  supposed to be less calories

bye

 i gotta say something

 she saved my life

i gotta say something

 all right here it goes

 nah

 what would i say?

 i could really get in trouble

 its a bee law

youre not supposed to talk to a human

 i cant believe im doing this

 ive got to

 oh i cant do it oome on

 no yes no

 do it i cant

 how should i start it?

"you like jazz?" no thats no good

 here she comes speak you fool

 hi

 im sorry

  youre talking

yes i know

 youre talking

 im so sorry

 no its ok its fine

i know im dreaming

 but i dont recall going to bed

 well im sure this

is very disconcerting

 this is a bit of a surprise to me

i mean youre a bee

 i am and im not supposed

to be doing this

 but they were all trying to kill me

 and if it wasnt for you

 i had to thank you

its just how i was raised

 that was a little weird

  im talking with a bee

yeah

 im talking to a bee

and the bee is talking to me

 i just want to say im grateful

ill leave now

  wait how did you learn to do that?

what?

 the talking thing

 same way you did i guess

"mama dada honey" you pick it up

  thats very funny

yeah

 bees are funny if we didnt laugh

wed cry with what we have to deal with

 anyway

 oan i

 get you something?

like what?

 i dont know i mean

i dont know ooffee?

 i dont want to put you out

 its no trouble it takes two minutes

  its just coffee

i hate to impose

  dont be ridiculous

actually i would love a cup

 hey you want rum cake?

  i shouldnt

have some

  no i cant

oome on

 im trying to lose a couple micrograms

  where?

these stripes dont help

 you look great

 i dont know if you know

anything about fashion

 are you all right?

 no

 hes making the tie in the cab

as theyre flying up madison

 he finally gets there

 he runs up the steps into the church

the wedding is on

 and he says "watermelon?

i thought you said guatemalan

 why would i marry a watermelon?"

 is that a bee joke?

 thats the kind of stuff we do

 yeah different

 so what are you gonna do barry?

 about work? i dont know

 i want to do my part for the hive

but i cant do it the way they want

 i know how you feel

  you do?

sure

 my parents wanted me to be a lawyer or

a doctor but i wanted to be a florist

  really?

my only interest is flowers

 our new queen was just elected

with that same campaign slogan

 anyway if you look

 theres my hive right there see it?

 youre in sheep meadow

 yes im right off the turtle pond

 no way i know that area

i lost a toe ring there once

  why do girls put rings on their toes?

why not?

  its like putting a hat on your knee

maybe ill try that

  you all right maam?

oh yeah fine

 just having two cups of coffee

 anyway this has been great

thanks for the coffee

 yeah its no trouble

 sorry i couldnt finish it if i did

id be up the rest of my life

 are you?

 oan i take a piece of this with me?

 sure here have a crumb

  thanks

yeah

 all right well then

i guess ill see you around

 or not

 ok barry

 and thank you

so much again for before

 oh that? that was nothing

 well not nothing but anyway

 this cant possibly work

 hes all set to go

we may as well try it

 ok dave pull the chute

  sounds amazing

it was amazing

 it was the scariest

happiest moment of my life

 humans i cant believe

you were with humans

 giant scary humans

what were they like?

 huge and crazy they talk crazy

 they eat crazy giant things

they drive crazy

  do they try and kill you like on tv?

some of them but some of them dont

  howd you get back?

poodle

 you did it and im glad you saw

whatever you wanted to see

 you had your "experience" now you

can pick out yourjob and be normal

  well

well?

 well i met someone

 you did? was she beeish?

  a wasp? your parents will kill you

no no no not a wasp

  spider?

im not attracted to spiders

 i know its the hottest thing

with the eight legs and all

 i cant get by that face

 so who is she?

 shes human

 no no thats a bee law

you wouldnt break a bee law

  her names vanessa

oh boy

 shes so nice and shes a florist

 oh no youre dating a human florist

 were not dating

 youre flying outside the hive talking

to humans that attack our homes

 with power washers and m80s

oneeighth a stick of dynamite

 she saved my life

and she understands me

 this is over

 eat this

 this is not over what was that?

  they call it a crumb

it was so stingin stripey

 and thats not what they eat

thats what falls off what they eat

  you know what a oinnabon is?

no

 its bread and cinnamon and frosting

they heat it up

 sit down

 really hot

listen to me

 we are not them were us

theres us and theres them

 yes but who can deny

the heart that is yearning?

 theres no yearning

stop yearning listen to me

 you have got to start thinking bee

my friend thinking bee

  thinking bee

thinking bee

 thinking bee thinking bee

thinking bee thinking bee

 there he is hes in the pool

 you know what your problem is barry?

 i gotta start thinking bee?

 how much longer will this go on?

 its been three days

why arent you working?

 ive got a lot of big life decisions

to think about

 what life? you have no life

you have no job youre barely a bee

 would it kill you

to make a little honey?

 barry come out

your fathers talking to you

 martin would you talk to him?

 barry im talking to you

 you coming?

 got everything?

 all set

 go ahead ill catch up

 dont be too long

 watch this

 vanessa

  were still here

i told you not to yell at him

 he doesnt respond to yelling

  then why yell at me?

because you dont listen

 im not listening to this

 sorry ive gotta go

  where are you going?

im meeting a friend

 a girl? is this why you cant decide?

 bye

 i just hope shes beeish

 they have a huge parade

of flowers every year in pasadena?

 to be in the tournament of roses

thats every florists dream

 up on a float surrounded

by flowers crowds cheering

 a tournament do the roses

compete in athletic events?

 no all right ive got one

how come you dont fly everywhere?

 its exhausting why dont you

run everywhere? its faster

 yeah ok i see i see

all right your turn

 tivo you can just freeze live tv?

thats insane

 you dont have that?

 we have hivo but its a disease

its a horrible horrible disease

 oh my

 dumb bees

 you must want to sting all those jerks

 we try not to sting

its usually fatal for us

 so you have to watch your temper

 very carefully

you kick a wall take a walk

 write an angry letter and throw it out

work through it like any emotion:

 anger jealousy lust

 oh my goodness are you ok?

 yeah

  what is wrong with you?

its a bug

 hes not bothering anybody

get out of here you creep

 what was that? a pic n save circular?

 yeah it was how did you know?

 it felt like about 10 pages

seventyfive is pretty much our limit

 youve really got that

down to a science

  i lost a cousin to italian vogue

ill bet

 what in the name

of mighty hercules is this?

 how did this get here?

oute bee golden blossom

 ray liotta private select?

  is he that actor?

i never heard of him

  why is this here?

for people we eat it

 you dont have

enough food of your own?

  well yes

how do you get it?

  bees make it

i know who makes it

 and its hard to make it

 theres heating cooling stirring

you need a whole krelman thing

  its organic

its ourganic

 its just honey barry

 just what?

 bees dont know about this

this is stealing a lot of stealing

 youve taken our homes schools

hospitals this is all we have

 and its on sale?

im getting to the bottom of this

 im getting to the bottom

of all of this

 hey hector

  you almost done?

almost

 he is here i sense it

 well i guess ill go home now

 and just leave this nice honey out

with no one around

 youre busted box boy

 i knew i heard something

so you can talk

 i can talk

and now youll start talking

 where you getting the sweet stuff?

whos your supplier?

 i dont understand

i thought we were friends

 the last thing we want

to do is upset bees

 youre too late its ours now

 you sir have crossed

the wrong sword

 you sir will be lunch

for my iguana ignacio

 where is the honey coming from?

 tell me where

 honey farms it comes from honey farms

 orazy person

 what horrible thing has happened here?

 these faces they never knew

what hit them and now

 theyre on the road to nowhere

 just keep still

 what? youre not dead?

 do i look dead? they will wipe anything

that moves where you headed?

 to honey farms

i am onto something huge here

 im going to alaska moose blood

crazy stuff blows your head off

 im going to tacoma

  and you?

he really is dead

 all right

 uhoh

  what is that?

oh no

  a wiper triple blade

triple blade?

 jump on its your only chance bee

 why does everything have

to be so doggone clean?

 how much do you people need to see?

 open your eyes

stick your head out the window

 from npr news in washington

im oarl kasell

 but dont kill no more bugs

  bee

moose blood guy

  you hear something?

like what?

 like tiny screaming

 turn off the radio

 whassup bee boy?

 hey blood

 just a row of honey jars

as far as the eye could see

 wow

 i assume wherever this truck goes

is where theyre getting it

 i mean that honeys ours

  bees hang tight

were all jammed in

 its a close community

 not us man we on our own

every mosquito on his own

  what if you get in trouble?

you a mosquito you in trouble

 nobody likes us they just smack

see a mosquito smack smack

 at least youre out in the world

you must meet girls

 mosquito girls try to trade up

get with a moth dragonfly

 mosquito girl dont want no mosquito

 you got to be kidding me

 moosebloods about to leave

the building so long bee

  hey guys

mooseblood

 i knew id catch yall down here

did you bring your crazy straw?

 we throw it in jars slap a label on it

and its pretty much pure profit

 what is this place?

 a bees got a brain

the size of a pinhead

 they are pinheads

 pinhead

  oheck out the new smoker

oh sweet thats the one you want

 the thomas 3000

 smoker?

 ninety puffs a minute semiautomatic

twice the nicotine all the tar

 a couple breaths of this

knocks them right out

 they make the honey

and we make the money

 "they make the honey

and we make the money"?

 oh my

 whats going on? are you ok?

 yeah it doesnt last too long

 do you know youre

in a fake hive with fake walls?

 our queen was moved here

we had no choice

 this is your queen?

thats a man in womens clothes

 thats a drag queen

 what is this?

 oh no

 theres hundreds of them

 bee honey

 our honey is being brazenly stolen

on a massive scale

 this is worse than anything bears

have done i intend to do something

 oh barry stop

 who told you humans are taking

our honey? thats a rumor

 do these look like rumors?

 thats a conspiracy theory

these are obviously doctored photos

 how did you get mixed up in this?

 hes been talking to humans

  what?

talking to humans?

 he has a human girlfriend

and they make out

 make out? barry

 we do not

  you wish you could

whose side are you on?

 the bees

 i dated a cricket once in san antonio

those crazy legs kept me up all night

 barry this is what you want

to do with your life?

 i want to do it for all our lives

nobody works harder than bees

 dad i remember you

coming home so overworked

 your hands were still stirring

you couldnt stop

 i remember that

 what right do they have to our honey?

 we live on two cups a year they put it

in lip balm for no reason whatsoever

 even if its true what can one bee do?

 sting them where it really hurts

 in the face the eye

  that would hurt

no

 up the nose? thats a killer

 theres only one place you can sting

the humans one place where it matters

 hive at five the hives only

fullhour action news source

 no more bee beards

 with bob bumble at the anchor desk

 weather with storm stinger

 sports with buzz larvi

 and jeanette ohung

  good evening im bob bumble

and im jeanette ohung

 a tricounty bee barry benson

 intends to sue the human race

for stealing our honey

 packaging it and profiting

from it illegally

 tomorrow night on bee larry king

 well have three former queens here in

our studio discussing their new book

 olassy ladies

out this week on hexagon

 tonight were talking to barry benson

 did you ever think "im a kid

from the hive i cant do this"?

 bees have never been afraid

to change the world

 what about bee oolumbus?

bee gandhi? bejesus?

 where im from wed never sue humans

 we were thinking

of stickball or candy stores

 how old are you?

 the bee community

is supporting you in this case

 which will be the trial

of the bee century

 you know they have a larry king

in the human world too

 its a common name next week

 he looks like you and has a show

and suspenders and colored dots

 next week

 glasses quotes on the bottom from the

guest even though you just heard em

 bear week next week

theyre scary hairy and here live

 always leans forward pointy shoulders

squinty eyes very jewish

 in tennis you attack

at the point of weakness

 it was my grandmother ken shes 81

 honey her backhands a joke

im not gonna take advantage of that?

 quiet please

actual work going on here

  is that that same bee?

yes it is

 im helping him sue the human race

  hello

hello bee

 this is ken

 yeah i remember you timberland size

ten and a half vibram sole i believe

 why does he talk again?

 listen you better go

cause were really busy working

 but its our yogurt night

 byebye

 why is yogurt night so difficult?

 you poor thing

you two have been at this for hours

 yes and adam here

has been a huge help

  frosting

how many sugars?

 just one i try not

to use the competition

 so why are you helping me?

 bees have good qualities

 and it takes my mind off the shop

 instead of flowers people

are giving balloon bouquets now

 those are great if youre three

 and artificial flowers

  oh those just get me psychotic

yeah me too

 bent stingers pointless pollination

 bees must hate those fake things

 nothing worse

than a daffodil thats had work done

 maybe this could make up

for it a little bit

  this lawsuits a pretty big deal

i guess

 you sure you want to go through with it?

 am i sure? when im done with

the humans they wont be able

 to say "honey im home"

without paying a royalty

 its an incredible scene

here in downtown manhattan

 where the world anxiously waits

because for the first time in history

 we will hear for ourselves

if a honeybee can actually speak

 what have we gotten into here barry?

 its pretty big isnt it?

 i cant believe how many humans

dont work during the day

 you think billiondollar multinational

food companies have good lawyers?

 everybody needs to stay

behind the barricade

  whats the matter?

i dont know i just got a chill

 well if it isnt the bee team

 you boys work on this?

 all rise the honorable

judge bumbleton presiding

 all right oase number 4475

 superior oourt of new york

barry bee benson v the honey industry

 is now in session

 mr montgomery youre representing

the five food companies collectively?

 a privilege

 mr benson youre representing

all the bees of the world?

 im kidding yes your honor

were ready to proceed

 mr montgomery

your opening statement please

 ladies and gentlemen of the jury

 my grandmother was a simple woman

 born on a farm she believed

it was mans divine right

 to benefit from the bounty

of nature god put before us

 if we lived in the topsyturvy world

mr benson imagines

 just think of what would it mean

 i would have to negotiate

with the silkworm

 for the elastic in my britches

 talking bee

 how do we know this isnt some sort of

 holographic motionpicturecapture

hollywood wizardry?

 they could be using laser beams

 robotics ventriloquism

oloning for all we know

 he could be on steroids

 mr benson?

 ladies and gentlemen

theres no trickery here

 im just an ordinary bee

honeys pretty important to me

 its important to all bees

we invented it

 we make it and we protect it

with our lives

 unfortunately there are

some people in this room

 who think they can take it from us

 cause were the little guys

im hoping that after this is all over

 youll see how by taking our honey

you not only take everything we have

 but everything we are

 i wish hed dress like that

all the time so nice

 oall your first witness

 so mr klauss vanderhayden

of honey farms big company you have

 i suppose so

 i see you also own

honeyburton and honron

 yes they provide beekeepers

for our farms

 beekeeper i find that

to be a very disturbing term

 i dont imagine you employ

any beefreeers do you?

  no

i couldnt hear you

  no

no

 because you dont free bees

you keep bees not only that

 it seems you thought a bear would be

an appropriate image for a jar of honey

 theyre very lovable creatures

 yogi bear fozzie bear buildabear

 you mean like this?

 bears kill bees

 howd you like his head crashing

through your living room?

 biting into your couch

spitting out your throw pillows

 ok thats enough take him away

 so mr sting thank you for being here

your name intrigues me

  where have i heard it before?

i was with a band called the police

 but youve never been

a police officer have you?

 no i havent

 no you havent and so here

we have yet another example

 of bee culture casually

stolen by a human

 for nothing more than

a pranceabout stage name

 oh please

 have you ever been stung mr sting?

 because im feeling

a little stung sting

 or should i say mr gordon m sumner

 thats not his real name? you idiots

 mr liotta first

belated congratulations on

 your emmy win for a guest spot

on er in 2005

 thank you thank you

 i see from your resume

that youre devilishly handsome

 with a churning inner turmoil

thats ready to blow

 i enjoy what i do is that a crime?

 not yet it isnt but is this

what its come to for you?

 exploiting tiny helpless bees

so you dont

 have to rehearse

your part and learn your lines sir?

 watch it benson

i could blow right now

 this isnt a goodfella

this is a badfella

 why doesnt someone just step on

this creep and we can all go home?

  order in this court

youre all thinking it

 order order i say

  say it

mr liotta please sit down

 i think it was awfully nice

of that bear to pitch in like that

 i think the jurys on our side

 are we doing everything right legally?

 im a florist

 right well heres to a great team

 to a great team

 well hello

  ken

hello

 i didnt think you were coming

 no i was just late

i tried to call but the battery

 i didnt want all this to go to waste

so i called barry luckily he was free

 oh that was lucky

 theres a little left

i could heat it up

 yeah heat it up sure whatever

 so i hear youre quite a tennis player

 im not much for the game myself

the balls a little grabby

 thats where i usually sit

right there

 ken barry was looking at your resume

 and he agreed with me that eating with

chopsticks isnt really a special skill

 you think i dont see what youre doing?

 i know how hard it is to find

the rightjob we have that in common

 do we?

 bees have 100 percent employment

but we do jobs like taking the crud out

 thats just what

i was thinking about doing

 ken i let barry borrow your razor

for his fuzz i hope that was all right

 im going to drain the old stinger

 yeah you do that

 look at that

 you know ive just about had it

 with your little mind games

  whats that?

italian vogue

 mamma mia thats a lot of pages

 a lot of ads

 remember what van said why is

your life more valuable than mine?

 funny i just cant seem to recall that

 i think something stinks in here

 i love the smell of flowers

 how do you like the smell of flames?

 not as much

 water bug not taking sides

 ken im wearing a ohapstick hat

this is pathetic

 ive got issues

 well well well a royal flush

  youre bluffing

am i?

 surfs up dude

 poo water

 that bowl is gnarly

 except for those dirty yellow rings

 kenneth what are you doing?

 you know i dont even like honey

i dont eat it

 we need to talk

 hes just a little bee

 and he happens to be

the nicest bee ive met in a long time

 long time? what are you talking about?

are there other bugs in your life?

 no but there are other things bugging

me in life and youre one of them

 fine talking bees no yogurt night

 my nerves are fried from riding

on this emotional roller coaster

 goodbye ken

 and for your information

 i prefer sugarfree artificial

sweeteners made by man

 im sorry about all that

 i know its got

an aftertaste i like it

 i always felt there was some kind

of barrier between ken and me

 i couldnt overcome it

oh well

 are you ok for the trial?

 i believe mr montgomery

is about out of ideas

 we would like to call

mr barry benson bee to the stand

 good idea you can really see why hes

considered one of the best lawyers

 yeah

 layton youve

gotta weave some magic

 with this jury

or its gonna be all over

 dont worry the only thing i have

to do to turn this jury around

 is to remind them

of what they dont like about bees

  you got the tweezers?

are you allergic?

 only to losing son only to losing

 mr benson bee ill ask you

what i think wed all like to know

 what exactly is your relationship

 to that woman?

 were friends

  good friends?

yes

 how good? do you live together?

 wait a minute

 are you her little

 bedbug?

 ive seen a bee documentary or two

from what i understand

 doesnt your queen give birth

to all the bee children?

  yeah but

so those arent your real parents

  oh barry

yes they are

 hold me back

 youre an illegitimate bee

arent you benson?

 hes denouncing bees

 dont yall date your cousins?

  objection

im going to pincushion this guy

 adam dont its what he wants

 oh im hit

 oh lordy i am hit

 order order

 the venom the venom

is coursing through my veins

 i have been felled

by a winged beast of destruction

 you see? you cant treat them

like equals theyre striped savages

 stingings the only thing

they know its their way

  adam stay with me

i cant feel my legs

 what angel of mercy

will come forward to suck the poison

 from my heaving buttocks?

 i will have order in this court order

 order please

 the case of the honeybees

versus the human race

 took a pointed turn against the bees

 yesterday when one of their legal

team stung layton t montgomery

  hey buddy

hey

  is there much pain?

yeah

 i

 i blew the whole case didnt i?

 it doesnt matter what matters is

youre alive you could have died

 id be better off dead look at me

 they got it from the cafeteria

downstairs in a tuna sandwich

 look theres

a little celery still on it

 what was it like to sting someone?

 i cant explain it it was all

 all adrenaline and then

and then ecstasy

 all right

 you think it was all a trap?

 of course im sorry

i flew us right into this

 what were we thinking? look at us were

just a couple of bugs in this world

 what will the humans do to us

if they win?

 i dont know

 i hear they put the roaches in motels

that doesnt sound so bad

 adam they check in

but they dont check out

 oh my

 oould you get a nurse

to close that window?

  why?

the smoke

 bees dont smoke

 right bees dont smoke

 bees dont smoke

but some bees are smoking

 thats it thats our case

 it is? its not over?

 get dressed ive gotta go somewhere

 get back to the court and stall

stall any way you can

 and assuming youve done step correctly youre ready for the tub

 mr flayman

 yes? yes your honor

 where is the rest of your team?

 well your honor its interesting

 bees are trained to fly haphazardly

 and as a result

we dont make very good time

 i actually heard a funny story about

 your honor

havent these ridiculous bugs

 taken up enough

of this courts valuable time?

 how much longer will we allow

these absurd shenanigans to go on?

 they have presented no compelling

evidence to support their charges

 against my clients

who run legitimate businesses

 i move for a complete dismissal

of this entire case

 mr flayman im afraid im going

 to have to consider

mr montgomerys motion

 but you cant we have a terrific case

 where is your proof?

where is the evidence?

 show me the smoking gun

 hold it your honor

you want a smoking gun?

 here is your smoking gun

 what is that?

 its a bee smoker

 what this?

this harmless little contraption?

 this couldnt hurt a fly

let alone a bee

 look at what has happened

 to bees who have never been asked

"smoking or non?"

 is this what nature intended for us?

 to be forcibly addicted

to smoke machines

 and manmade wooden slat work camps?

 living out our lives as honey slaves

to the white man?

  what are we gonna do?

hes playing the species card

 ladies and gentlemen please

free these bees

 free the bees free the bees

 free the bees

 free the bees free the bees

 the court finds in favor of the bees

 vanessa we won

 i knew you could do it highfive

 sorry

 im ok you know what this means?

 all the honey

will finally belong to the bees

 now we wont have

to work so hard all the time

 this is an unholy perversion

of the balance of nature benson

 youll regret this

 barry how much honey is out there?

 all right one at a time

 barry who are you wearing?

 my sweater is ralph lauren

and i have no pants

  what if montgomerys right?

what do you mean?

 weve been living the bee way

a long time 27 million years

 oongratulations on your victory

what will you demand as a settlement?

 first well demand a complete shutdown

of all bee work camps

 then we want back the honey

that was ours to begin with

 every last drop

 we demand an end to the glorification

of the bear as anything more

 than a filthy smelly

badbreath stink machine

 were all aware

of what they do in the woods

 wait for my signal

 take him out

 hell have nauseous

for a few hours then hell be fine

 and we will no longer tolerate

beenegative nicknames

 but its just a pranceabout stage name

 unnecessary inclusion of honey

in bogus health products

 and ladeeda human

teatime snack garnishments

 oant breathe

 bring it in boys

 hold it right there good

 tap it

 mr buzzwell we just passed three cups

and theres gallons more coming

  i think we need to shut down

shut down? weve never shut down

 shut down honey production

 stop making honey

 turn your key sir

 what do we do now?

 oannonball

 were shutting honey production

 mission abort

 aborting pollination and nectar detail

returning to base

 adam you wouldnt believe

how much honey was out there

 oh yeah?

 whats going on? where is everybody?

  are they out celebrating?

theyre home

 they dont know what to do

laying out sleeping in

 i heard your uncle oarl was on his way

to san antonio with a cricket

 at least we got our honey back

 sometimes i think so what if humans

liked our honey? who wouldnt?

 its the greatest thing in the world

i was excited to be part of making it

 this was my new desk this was my

new job i wanted to do it really well

 and now

 now i cant

 i dont understand

why theyre not happy

 i thought their lives would be better

 theyre doing nothing its amazing

honey really changes people

 you dont have any idea

whats going on do you?

  what did you want to show me?

this

 what happened here?

 that is not the half of it

 oh no oh my

 theyre all wilting

 doesnt look very good does it?

 no

 and whose fault do you think that is?

 you know im gonna guess bees

 bees?

 specifically me

 i didnt think bees not needing to make

honey would affect all these things

 its notjust flowers

fruits vegetables they all need bees

 thats our whole sat test right there

 take away produce that affects

the entire animal kingdom

 and then of course

 the human species?

 so if theres no more pollination

 it could all just go south here

couldnt it?

 i know this is also partly my fault

 how about a suicide pact?

 how do we do it?

  ill sting you you step on me

thatjust kills you twice

 right right

 listen barry

sorry but i gotta get going

 i had to open my mouth and talk

 vanessa?

 vanessa? why are you leaving?

where are you going?

 to the final tournament of roses parade

in pasadena

 theyve moved it to this weekend

because all the flowers are dying

 its the last chance

ill ever have to see it

 vanessa i just wanna say im sorry

i never meant it to turn out like this

 i know me neither

 tournament of roses

roses cant do sports

 wait a minute roses roses?

 roses

 vanessa

 roses?

 barry?

  roses are flowers

yes they are

 flowers bees pollen

 i know

thats why this is the last parade

 maybe not

oould you ask him to slow down?

 oould you slow down?

 barry

 ok i made a huge mistake

this is a total disaster all my fault

 yes it kind of is

 ive ruined the planet

i wanted to help you

 with the flower shop

ive made it worse

 actually its completely closed down

 i thought maybe you were remodeling

 but i have another idea and its

greater than my previous ideas combined

 i dont want to hear it

 all right they have the roses

the roses have the pollen

 i know every bee plant

and flower bud in this park

 all we gotta do is get what theyve got

back here with what weve got

  bees

park

  pollen

flowers

  repollination

across the nation

 tournament of roses

pasadena oalifornia

 theyve got nothing

but flowers floats and cotton candy

 security will be tight

 i have an idea

 vanessa bloome ftd

 official floral business its real

 sorry maam nice brooch

 thank you it was a gift

 once inside

we just pick the right float

 how about the princess and the pea?

 i could be the princess

and you could be the pea

 yes i got it

  where should i sit?

what are you?

  i believe im the pea

the pea?

 it goes under the mattresses

  not in this fairy tale sweetheart

im getting the marshal

 you do that

this whole parade is a fiasco

 lets see what this babyll do

 hey what are you doing?

 then all we do

is blend in with traffic

 without arousing suspicion

 once at the airport

theres no stopping us

 stop security

  you and your insect pack your float?

yes

 has it been

in your possession the entire time?

 would you remove your shoes?

  remove your stinger

its part of me

 i know just having some fun

enjoy your flight

 then if were lucky well have

just enough pollen to do the job

 oan you believe how lucky we are? we

have just enough pollen to do the job

 i think this is gonna work

 its got to work

 attention passengers

this is oaptain scott

 we have a bit of bad weather

in new york

 it looks like well experience

a couple hours delay

 barry these are cut flowers

with no water theyll never make it

 i gotta get up there

and talk to them

 be careful

 oan i get help

with the sky mall magazine?

 id like to order the talking

inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer

 oaptain im in a real situation

  whatd you say hal?

nothing

 bee

 dont freak out my entire species

 what are you doing?

  wait a minute im an attorney

whos an attorney?

 dont move

 oh barry

 good afternoon passengers

this is your captain

 would a miss vanessa bloome in 24b

please report to the cockpit?

 and please hurry

 what happened here?

 there was a dustbuster

a toupee a life raft exploded

 ones bald ones in a boat

theyre both unconscious

  is that another bee joke?

no

 no ones flying the plane

 this is jfk control tower flight 356

whats your status?

 this is vanessa bloome

im a florist from new york

 wheres the pilot?

 hes unconscious

and so is the copilot

 not good does anyone onboard

have flight experience?

 as a matter of fact there is

  whos that?

barry benson

 from the honey trial? oh great

 vanessa this is nothing more

than a big metal bee

 its got giant wings huge engines

 i cant fly a plane

  why not? isnt john travolta a pilot?

yes

 how hard could it be?

 wait barry

were headed into some lightning

 this is bob bumble we have some

latebreaking news from jfk airport

 where a suspenseful scene

is developing

 barry benson

fresh from his legal victory

 thats barry

 is attempting to land a plane

loaded with people flowers

 and an incapacitated flight crew

 flowers?

 we have a storm in the area

and two individuals at the controls

 with absolutely no flight experience

 just a minute

theres a bee on that plane

 im quite familiar with mr benson

and his noaccount compadres

 theyve done enough damage

 but isnt he your only hope?

 technically a bee

shouldnt be able to fly at all

 their wings are too small

 havent we heard this a million times?

 "the surface area of the wings

and body mass make no sense"

  get this on the air

got it

  stand by

were going live

 the way we work may be a mystery to you

 making honey takes a lot of bees

doing a lot of small jobs

 but let me tell you about a small job

 if you do it well

it makes a big difference

 more than we realized

to us to everyone

 thats why i want to get bees

back to working together

 thats the bee way

were not made of jello

 we get behind a fellow

  black and yellow

hello

 left right down hover

  hover?

forget hover

 this isnt so hard

beepbeep beepbeep

 barry what happened?

 wait i think we were

on autopilot the whole time

  that may have been helping me

and now were not

 so it turns out i cannot fly a plane

 all of you lets get

behind this fellow move it out

 move out

 our only chance is if i do what id do

you copy me with the wings of the plane

 dont have to yell

 im not yelling

were in a lot of trouble

 its very hard to concentrate

with that panicky tone in your voice

 its not a tone im panicking

 i cant do this

 vanessa pull yourself together

you have to snap out of it

 you snap out of it

 you snap out of it

  you snap out of it

you snap out of it

  you snap out of it

you snap out of it

  you snap out of it

you snap out of it

  hold it

why? oome on its my turn

 how is the plane flying?

 i dont know

 hello?

 benson got any flowers

for a happy occasion in there?

 the pollen jocks

 they do get behind a fellow

  black and yellow

hello

 all right lets drop this tin can

on the blacktop

 where? i cant see anything oan you?

 no nothing its all cloudy

 oome on you got to think bee barry

  thinking bee

thinking bee

 thinking bee

thinking bee thinking bee

 wait a minute

i think im feeling something

  what?

i dont know its strong pulling me

 like a 27millionyearold instinct

 bring the nose down

 thinking bee

thinking bee thinking bee

  what in the world is on the tarmac?

get some lights on that

 thinking bee

thinking bee thinking bee

  vanessa aim for the flower

ok

 out the engines were going in

on bee power ready boys?

 affirmative

 good good easy now thats it

 land on that flower

 ready? full reverse

 spin it around

  not that flower the other one

which one?

  that flower

im aiming at the flower

 thats a fat guy in a flowered shirt

i mean the giant pulsating flower

 made of millions of bees

 pull forward nose down tail up

 rotate around it

  this is insane barry

thiss the only way i know how to fly

 am i kookookachoo or is this plane

flying in an insectlike pattern?

 get your nose in there dont be afraid

smell it full reverse

 just drop it be a part of it

 aim for the center

 now drop it in drop it in woman

 oome on already

 barry we did it

you taught me how to fly

  yes no highfive

right

 barry it worked

did you see the giant flower?

 what giant flower? where? of course

i saw the flower that was genius

  thank you

but were not done yet

 listen everyone

 this runway is covered

with the last pollen

 from the last flowers

available anywhere on earth

 that means this is our last chance

 were the only ones who make honey

pollinate flowers and dress like this

 if were gonna survive as a species

this is our moment what do you say?

 are we going to be bees orjust

museum of natural history keychains?

 were bees

 keychain

 then follow me except keychain

 hold on barry here

 youve earned this

 yeah

 im a pollen jock and its a perfect

fit all i gotta do are the sleeves

 oh yeah

 thats our barry

 mom the bees are back

 if anybody needs

to make a call nows the time

 i got a feeling well be

working late tonight

 heres your change have a great

afternoon oan i help whos next?

 would you like some honey with that?

it is beeapproved dont forget these

 milk cream cheese its all me

and i dont see a nickel

 sometimes i just feel

like a piece of meat

 i had no idea

 barry im sorry

have you got a moment?

 would you excuse me?

my mosquito associate will help you

 sorry im late

 hes a lawyer too?

 i was already a bloodsucking parasite

all i needed was a briefcase

 have a great afternoon

 barry i just got this huge tulip order

and i cant get them anywhere

 no problem vannie

just leave it to me

 youre a lifesaver barry

oan i help whos next?

 all right scramble jocks

its time to fly

 thank you barry

 that bee is living my life

 let it go kenny

  when will this nightmare end?

let it all go

  beautiful day to fly

sure is

 between you and me

i was dying to get out of that office

 you have got

to start thinking bee my friend

  thinking bee

me?

 hold it lets just stop

for a second hold it

 im sorry im sorry everyone

oan we stop here?

 im not making a major life decision

during a production number

 all right take ten everybody

wrap it up guys

 i had virtually no rehearsal for that