#i am absolutely NOT going to recommend you watch it. it is INCREDIBLY boring

[colorful-horses]

I ragged on High Guardian Spice a lot while I was watching it, but I have to admit that ever since then, I legitimately cannot stop thinking about it.

The way it completely lacks plot, hooks, interesting concepts, characters, or anything remotely unique is, in and of itself, kind of incredible. I've truly never watched another show like it. Its not even unforgivabley bad—it's just NOTHING. If HGS were a color, it'd be beige.

The most enticing aspect of High Guardian Spice is how, across the whole 12 episode run, never once do they even ACCIDENTALLY stumble into anything interesting. It IS a special show, but only because, despite all odds, it completely fails to be special at Every Single Possible Turn.

I love it. I've watched it 7 times.

[mermaidsirennikita]

Watch Lady Chatterley's Lover (2022) and then Read...

I absolutely loved Lady Chatterley's Lover (2022). I think it was a triumph of the female gaze, Emma Corrin being the Period Piece Pinch Hitter we all need in a post-Keira world, and fucking in the woods.

To be clear, the book is not a romance. It does not end unhappily (more like "to be continued", without any intention of a continuation and clarification) but it's not a romance. The movie, I would argue... is pretty close to being a romance, or just a romance outright. Joely Richardson looks at the camera and goes "this is a love story", and by God, who am I to question Joely Richardson (who also was Lady Chatterley once). It hits many of the classic notes of a historical romance novel--hardcore fucking and immediately having an existential crisis after, "my god, how could this constant unprotected sex I'm having result in a PREGNANCY???", a douchey rich guy who wants to publish his stupid novella.

After watching it, I wanted to go through my rolodex of books and throw up some recommendations for what to read after watching this movie and getting a bit. Interested.

I tried to focus on a) interclass dynamics or b) illicit affairs. Ideally both, but it's more about the vibe than the readalike nature.

The Leopard Prince by Elizabeth Hoyt. In many ways, a Lady Chatterley vibe without the annoying husband and *with* a murder mystery. Our heroine is a wealthy heiress who travels to an estate she recently inherited on her own, employing an experience steward to help her with the business side of things. And with the business side of things. Elizabeth Hoyt writes some of the best sex in the game, and there's a lot of great class conflict in this one.

Waking Up with the Duke by Lorraine Heath. A Lady Chatterley setup but with less class conflict and more *secrets*. The Duke of Ainsley, genteel and well-mannered, still feels real bad for that time he got into a carriage accident with his best friend, which resulted in said friend's permanent impotency. Friend asks Ainsley to pay him back by fucking his wife, Jayne, in order to ensure that she has the baby she's always wanted. Jayne is like "say what now", because she does in fact hold the accident against Ainsley, and Ainsley is all "I COULD NEVER--but if you're like... insisting..." because of course, he has always carried a torch for Jayne. A month of hot, angsty, "don't kiss me on the mouth" cottage sex ensues, and the emotional fallout for these idiots is MAGNIFICENT.

The Countess by Sophie Jordan. Not out yet, but put this one on your TBR because there is certainly a married lady discovering her sexuality in the arms of another man (wealthy, but of a different social class) around these parts. Out 3/28/23.

Between the Devil and Desire by Lorraine Heath. For the "this coarse man is lighting my ladylike fires" vibe. Our heroine is a recently widowed duchess with a young son, who comes to find out that--what the fuck--her husband left the guardianship of their child to a man she doesn't even fucking know. The hero grew up on the streets and has risen to become a successful club owner, but is still very much lower class. They move in together, and incredible sexual tension and heightened emotions ensue. TW: discussion of childhood sexual abuse.

Dreaming of You by Lisa Kleypas. This might seem a bit left field at first, but I shall recommend it because a) there is a huge emphasis on class in this novel. Sara is not necessarily a hugely upper class lady, but she is a genteel lady, and Derek Craven's awareness of their social differences and his roughness against her softness is a huge part of their conflict in the first half of the book. B) sexual awakening is very emphasized in Sara's journey. C) Sara does have a boring fucking fiance who's like "Sara, it's okay if we aren't that into each other sexually" while Sara, having just gotten her titties sucked at a party, is like "UHHHHHH NO THAT IS NOT OKAY". D) Much like Oliver Mellors, Derek Craven suffers from "is very smart but sometimes we don't know what he's saying" syndrome.

Duchess by Day, Mistress by Night by Stacy Reid. Our heroine is another widowed duchess with a young son--but this time, she's on the hunt for the governess that ditched in a flash. She hires the coarse, lower class but nonetheless successful fixer in town to help her... And his price ends up being a bit more carnal than monetary. VERY illicit affairs dot mp3.

Notorious Pleasures by Elizabeth Hoyt. No class difference here, but we do have a lot of illicit sneaking around when our heroine begins sleeping with her betrothed's roguish brother--who might just fuck the rigid rule following sensibility right out of her.

Her Night with the Duke by Diana Quincy. A widow has a one night stand with a handsome stranger, only to discover that he's courting her stepdaughter. It's messy, it's angsty, it's hot, and I do believe there are some outdoor activities.

[lumiereandcogsworth]

hey lumi! I just thought of another question I wanted to ask you, other than batb, which live action remake do you think is the best? I haven't seen any and I want an expert opinion 😄

oh my gosh!!!!! i’m so honored. and i’m also SO autistic so i did so much more here than you asked. but anyway i wanted to wait to answer this until today because the little mermaid (2023) just dropped on disney+ and i JUST watched it for the first time. so i can include it in my list!!

of course prefacing with these are all my personal opinions, im not a film expert (and i pray to God i never am) i just like what i like! so without further ado: my thoughts! also this is just in chronological order, not ranked.

alice in wonderland (2010) - dude!! this was SUCH a hyperfixation for me when i was a kid. somehow, batb 2017 is NOT the first live action disney movie i’ve been utterly obsessed with. this movie is so good. i love the lightly gothic, mysterious fantasy aesthetic that is has. i love the wardrobe, i want to wear every outfit alice wears. i love how dark it is, like there’s such an edge to it while still being pleasant and fun enough to respectably be a disney movie. johnny depp does a fantastic job of course, (purely discussing his acting abilities here) he truly brings the madness into the mad hatter. all the acting is fantastic though. i highly recommend this film. you don’t really need to have seen the 1951 cartoon, i hadn’t, but it doesn’t hurt to! (i don’t recommend the sequel, alice through the looking glass, though. they really should’ve quit while they were ahead on this one)

maleficent (2014) & maleficent: mistress of evil (2019) - i enjoyed both of these!! i actually liked the second one more, but either way, it’s such a fun take on sleeping beauty. and this is coming from someone who LOVES sleeping beauty 1959!! it’s different obviously but it really is a good time, absolutely worth watching.

cinderella (2015) - beautiful! lovely!! not the most exciting film honestly but i do love the aesthetics and wardrobe. it’s a really pretty, pleasant movie. i’d love to rewatch it sometime! if only disney+ had it! which it doesn’t! for some inexplicable reason!!

beauty and the beast (2017) - i know you said besides my wife but obviously i have to still list it because. that’s my wife. anyway perfect film no notes!

the nutcracker and the four realms (2018) - i wanted to like this one so much more than i did. but it was just, so weird. it derails from canon in a way that isn’t enjoyable. ah. twas a let down, for me.

christopher robin (2018) - i don’t remember much honestly but it’s cute!! certainly worth a watch, but i don’t recall anything too special about it. it did make me cry though (that’s not hard for me to do at movies, to be fair)

mary poppins returns (2018) - CANNOT RECOMMEND ENOUGH!! THIS MOVIE IS LIKE IF JOY WAS TURNED INTO A FILM!!!! AAAHHH!!! :) SO LOVELY SO WONDERFUL!!!

the lion king (2019) - :/ genuinely not worth your time. it was TOO similar to the cartoon in terms of storyline, so it felt incredibly pointless to me. plus, it’s kind of boring that they look like real lions. i felt like i was watching animal planet but then pulled out of reality whenever they spoke or sang afjskfj

aladdin (2019) - ever since i saw this, i’ve only ever had three takeaways, and i’ll say them like a compliment sandwich. 1. visually STUNNING. the colors and the choreography, the people! all very beautiful. 2. the romance was… very flat? i honestly kept forgetting there was a love story going on. when they kiss at the end i was like “OOOHHH RIGHT!!” lmao. there’s just so much other stuff going on, jasmine & aladdin’s love story really fell to the wayside for me. 3. i LOVED that they gave jasmine her own song. she’s like the only disney princess that didn’t have her own song, somehow, so i was happy they gave her one and it was SO good. i remember it giving me chills on the first listen. — so, all in all, it was fine. not the worst but also not a personal favorite. worth a watch.

mulan (2020) - BLEGH sorry i almost threw up a little. maybe the worst live action remake of all time? let’s think: what are the best parts of mulan 1998? the music? mushu? shang’s bisexuality? shang, in general?? WELL LOOK NO FURTHER BECAUSE THIS HAS NONE OF THAT!!! :) it’s genuinely just… so bad. they took the basic concept and turned it into a freaky ass action movie. they make it so mulan was like, gifted from a young age with superhuman abilities (calling it chi, which, i don’t know the full story but i believe there was some major cultural appropriation that occured) instead of just being a normal badass human!!! and it wasn’t the villain from the cartoon it was a random witch. nothing made sense and it was stripped of everything that makes mulan one of the greatest disney films of all time. *godfather voice* look how they massacred my boy.

the little mermaid (2023) - so honestly i never really liked the original cartoon. it just never clicked with me. but i had every bit of hope that this one would maybe bring it to life for me!! and… well, it wasn’t bad! it was visually lovely and the music was fun. i just don’t think i’m a “love at first sight” kind of person. but eric was an incredibly likable nerd boy, sebastian the crab was funny, and ursula was SCARY. especially at the end oh my gosh???? anyway. worth a watch, but not my personal cup of tea. ariel and eric get points for dancing a bit AND they hugged at the end which was really sweet. couples Do Not hug enough in media.

lastly, i can’t comment on: peter pan & wendy (2023), the jungle book (2016), dumbo (2019), lady and the tramp (2019), and cruella (2021), because i have not seen them. i will absolutely note though that i despise cruella 2021 in solidarity with my friend @freakwiththeknifecollection because it blatantly disregards the canon of 101 dalmatians 1961 and they couldn’t even like?? train the dogs?? for ONE scene?? huge huge mess. i’m just scratching the surface. if you want a live action cruella, look no further than 101 dalmatians 1996. top tier live action that i loved as a kid!!

[azfellandco]

I was tagged by @lineffability to do this tag game! Thanks for tagging me, I know I haven't been around much so it's nice to feel included in things.

favorite color: very light, pale, greyish blue

last song: Dead is the New Alive by Emilie Autumn

last movie: I think when I rewatched Palm Springs a few weeks ago?

currently watching: Farscape! A friend is showing it to me as it's one of few scifi series she's seen that I haven't yet. I'm enjoying it very much so far, if I have one criticism it's that the male lead is very boring (this is not that important as he's the everyman in a cast of aliens and all of them are incredibly interesting).

other stuff i watched this year: Reservation Dogs, which is really, really good. I don't know how to recommend this show but you should look it up and see if it grabs your interest, I've never seen anyone talk about it on here and I think it deserves more love from tumblr. Also watched Letterkenny (also very good) and a lot of youtube (the latest season of Puppet History was *chef's kiss* and I am currently defaulting to putting on The Try Guys when I need background noise). I rewatched the first four seasons of Doctor Who after Good Omens if that counts.

shows i dropped this year: The Witcher's latest season was so boring I didn't even bother to watch the three latest episodes (them coming out like, the same day Good Omens S2 dropped did not help, absolutely baffling creative choice to split the season up like that). Also MASH.

currently reading: the Crimson Peak novelization, Hellsing, and Octavia's Brood: Science Fiction From Social Justice Movements.

currently listening to: my Halloween playlist and my Re-Animator playlist. The Good Omens audiobook (not the one done by the cast, the older one) (it was available with no hold at the library).

currently working on: Line said "life" and honestly same. Also I signed up for yuletide this year and will start working on a fic for that soon.

current obsession/s: I'm about to start playing Baldur's Gate 3 this evening and I am really hoping it grabs me by the throat in the way of hyperfixations because every post I see about Asterion on tumblr makes me go oh? Oh? Okay.

I'm tagging @guardian-of-soho @maniacalmole @baggvinshield @dykemisspiggy and anybody else who wants to do it!

[rings-of-power-realm]

10 star reviews about The Rings of Power 💚

The first season isn't even finished yet and already I have recommended this show to friends and family more than any previous media. Every episode so far (5 released) have surpassed my expectations, which were fairly high going in. As someone who has read all of Tolkien's published works (some more than I'd care to admit), anyone saying that "Tolkien is turning in his grave" has absolutely no idea what they're talking about. It was always going to be walking a thin line between creative choices and already established canon, but I can see, so far anyway, that they have absolutely aced it. If the show continues to be as great as it has thus far, I can see this being one of the all time great masterpieces of TV history, and for many years to come. It's incredibly rare that I won't have criticisms of some kind, especially for something I am passionate about, and the only criticism I have of the Rings of Power is that I can't listen to the sound track 24 hours a day, because I have to sleep at some stage. Bear McCreary has written a masterpiece worthy of being pinned up on the wall with Howard Shore's work from the Lord of the Rings.

                                                         🧝

Don't listen to the negative reviews. Some people have an idea of what something should be in their own mind. I too have read mostly all of Tolkien's books. You form a world in your mind from those words. It's yours it's personal. This show is Magnificent. It's a big bold dive into Middle Earth. Beautifully filmed and acted. The first too episodes are structured in a way to set a scene for the multiple storylines for multiple characters which as the series progresses will merge in to one common fight against the darkness. It's absolutely fantastic and if you don't watch it because of someone's snobby 1/10 then you will be missing out.   

                                                        🧙‍♂️

I can't believe people who are giving this such negative reviews. Who cares if it's not the way you think it should be portrayed because of your version of what you think you read from his original works. It is fantastically entertaining, incredibly well shot and produced, and while the story lines were slow to get rolling, and I don't necessarily think that some of the characters lineup with how they were portrayed in the Lord of the Rings movies later, it really doesn't matter. These are NEW. I can't wait for each episode to come out, I look forward to watching these every week, and I would love to be able to see all of them in the theater. The first two we saw through a free preview, and I wish I could watch every single episode on a huge screen! Enjoy them for what they are.

                                                          🏹

This is the first prequel I have ever seen that was not a disappointment. I love the acting, the faithfulness to Tolkien's vision, the use of reworked ideas/themes/dialogue from the Lord of the Rings, and the compelling worldbuilding. It is important to remember that this is an interpretation, not an adaptation, as this story is based on timelines in the Appendices to LOTR and not on Tolkien stories. Therefore, the showrunners had to invent story arcs and characters to flesh out the story. If they had note done this, then the show would be boring and empty. They did a great job filling in the gaps and told a story that I have already rewatched many times.

                                                         🧝🏿‍♂️

I almost didn't watch because of other reviews but I've learned to not even pay much attention to them. This feels just like Lord of the Rings to me. It could actually be its own movie. The acting is great, the scenery and graphics are amazing. I've been hooked and entertained since the first episode! Can't wait to see more.

                                                         🗡️

I was putting off watching this for a while but one night I couldn't find anything to watch and I put this on and now I'm glad I did. It's the first thing I look forward to after a long day of work. I think the plot is fantastic. I read a review that said they didn't know where the plot was going but how can you not? It's very easy to follow. I'm in love with the series already.

I am blown away by the quality of this production. There is nothing like it. Although it is not an original story written by JRR Tolkien, it is an interesting one; an important backstory.

Although the story unfolds slowly, like in most series, it has a decent amount of action and suspense. Watch it and indulge yourself in Middle Earth. And about all the criticism... This is my take: To me, there are two Middle Earths. (1) The original one that you have imagined when reading the books. (2) The world created by John Howe, Alan Lee, Peter Jackson, make-up artists, actors, etc., etc. This series fits right into the later one and does it justice.

                                                       🍂

Don't believe those fools who are giving bad ratings and negative reviews. I don't know why so much hate for this show. I'm so obsessed with this show right now and have watched all the six episodes non-stop and wanting more soooo badly. I mean the acting, the scenes, the dialogues and above all the VFX are soooo beautiful put together that will make your mind blown by this masterpiece. I've really enjoyed and didn't look away for a second while watching. It really took me to the place where I couldn't have imagine in my dreams. Please guys stop giving the bad ratings and reviews to a show like this one. This show deserve all the love and not the hate. We all should appreciate the work and efforts put in this show.

                                                        🔮

I think this prequel was beautifully done. The visuals are stunning, and story is excellent. There is a very satisfying last episode of season 1. I'm excited to see more. I had no problem adjusting and accepting the younger version of known characters, specifically Galadriel and Elrond. I think the acting and writing felt true to Middle Earth. I'm a fan of the books (Hobbit, LotR and The Silmarillian) which I read before the movies were released. I'm thrilled to have new Tolkien inspired material even if it's from the imagination of someone else, it is brilliant and a wonderful addition to the Middle Earth lore. There seem to be too many of the instant gratification society who were too impatient to wait for the payoff. Looking at the dates of many of the reviews is frustrating seeing that people couldn't reserve judgement until 10/14 after the season could be viewed as a whole. People have become to used to being able to binge a new show in a few days and not have to wait and dwell over what might happen and the new information presented in each episode. It has been exciting to see it unfold week by week. I'm glad for the return to this method of releasing a new series.                                                

Link to the 10 star reviews🍄

[kanerallels]

🍦 and 🌿 for the ask game!

🍦: Name three good things about a character you hate. Daaaaaaaaaang we're starting out pretty difficult ain't we? Um, let's see. All I can think of is characters I absolutely loathe with a fiery passion, and there is no way on the Lord's green earth I am up to complimenting Nick Ryan right now. So I'll go with... oh my stars this is gonna be awful. Kark it, let's go with... Monica Stevens from The Rookie. Whenever she's onscreen I immediately start quoting Holt insulting Madeline Wuntch, so she definitely qualifies. Three things: 1, she's smart, 2, she's got cool red hair, and 3, she has the morals of a gargan rockroach a lot of creative solutions, which is important to have as a lawyer

(Sky above I feel like Holt when he had to compliment Wuntch)

🌿: Give some advice on writer's block and low creativity. Okay I have a couple of solutions that generally help a lot:

Read. Don't watch something, and (while this does help sometimes) don't read fan fic. Read an actual book, maybe of a similar genre to the story you're trying to write. Creativity is sometimes like a battery, that you need to recharge. If you don't, you burn out a LOT faster

In a similar vein, doing literally anything else helps. I have found that incredibly repetitive and boring tasks are pretty helpful. One time I had writer's block, and at work that day my boss put me in charge of basically, watching something print, and occasionally taking parts of the (incredibly long) printed book out of the printer and stacking it to the side. Needless to say, my writer's block had shattered by the end and I was coming up with a new story idea

Write something short and fun that you're actually excited about! Sometimes you need a break from your main project, and that's okay. Take that break! Write like 500 words about something that sounds fun, and let the enjoyment of being creative there carry over to your first project

Listening to music (especially instrumental) helps me focus a LOT. I recommend the Interstellar soundtrack, or anything else by Hans Zimmer (or Michael Giacchino)

I have found talking about it with someone I know and trust really, really helps me untangle any messes I have going on. Or going on a walk, for that matter

Truth or dare writing ask game!!

[quinnigallagherjones]

hi! 💙 tell me about your favourite films!

hi nat !! 💙💙

this is so fun because i love filmssss so in no particular order:

knives out (2019) - best movie to ever exist imo !!!!!! there are so many things i love about this movie but the main one is that i never get bored of it, i can't even count how many times i have seen it at this point but every time i do watch it i am just amazed at how good it is !!! the cast, the score, the flow of the movie like it's so PERFECT, i could keep going on about this movie but let's move on so this post isn't really long hahaha

everything everywhere all at once (2022) - i still don't have words for how this movie made me feel, it was such a wild ride like i was crying one moment and then laughing the next and then back to crying, it's an amazing story and also the visuals in this movie are STUNNING !!! would recommend this movie to anyone who hasn't already seen it

emma (2020) - i am a sucker for period drama / romance films and let me tell you THIS IS THE ONE !!!!! jane austen's stories are all so beautiful and this adaptation is truly so so good !! anya taylor joy and johnny flynn have the wildest chemistry i have ever seen and play the tension perfectly !!!!

ready or not (2019) - this isn't shocking to anyone i am sure as i used to be tumblr user gracelcdomas but LISTEN !!! SHE IS THE SUPERIOR FINAL GIRL !!!! i think i am just in love with samara weaving but this movie is so so good and it's another movie that i never get tired of, it's so funny and fucked up and such a wild ride

the grand budapest hotel (2014) - OKAY so i finally watched this movie recently and omg it instantly became a comfort movie for me !! this movie deserves all the hype and praise it gets truly like it's visually stunning but also an amazing storyline with an incredible cast !!! it's also very funny to me that two of my favourite films have will readings that end up in absolute chaos hahahah

spider-man: into the spider-verse (2018) - this movie man !!!!! i am so fucking happy that we finally got a spider-man film THIS FUCKING GOOD !!! when i tell you that this is the best spider-man movie i MEAN THAT SHIT !!!!! miles morales and gwen stacy are my beloveds and also whoever cast jake johnson as peter b. parker i owe you MY LIFE !!!! seriously everyone needs to go watch this movie even if you don't give a fuck about superheroes pls DO IT

chicken run (2000) - i can't talk about some of my favourite films without mentioning chicken run !!!! this is a movie that is very nostalgic to me as my siblings and i used to watch it all the time but listen even as an adult i still ADORE THIS MOVIE !!!!! i feel like this movie is so good on so many levels but the best part about it is rooting for them the whole time and seeing them finally free at the end is just SO DAMN GOOD !!! like listen this film is CINEMA BABY !!!! PLEASE EVERYONE GO WATCH IT !!!!

i really want to keep going on about films but this post is already too long so i am just going to add a few honourable mentions here: wwdits (2014), monsters inc (2001), portrait of a lady on fire (2019), pride and prejudice (2005), get out (2017), puss in boots: the last wish (2022) and tick tick boom (2021) !!

sleepover asks !!

[vigilskeep]

i havent decided if im gonna watch absolution yet because I'm seeing a lot of mixed reviews, whats your take on it as a whole??

it was a lot of fun actually!! it’s incredibly fast-paced and very short (six 25 min episodes), so it’s easy to watch in one sitting if you want and you certainly won’t get bored. you don’t get much time to linger with the characters so a lot of them don’t get much development at all but they’re charming and the protagonist and villain are compelling and carry it well. there’s a lot of action which was generally fun to watch especially when you’re as invested in seeing dragon age class abilities translated to screen as i am

overall i liked it, it wasn’t perfect but it was genuinely a good time. i’m going to give it another watch to solidify some of my thoughts on the plot and characters :) there are a couple of reveals that seem like they’re going to be crucial to da4 so i would recommend giving it a watch regardless if you’re interested in keeping up with the world

[koladelight]

Spoilers for Code: Realize - Guardian of Rebirth and Future Blessings:

Having now finished the whole game and all the possible endings and extras, I wanted to write about the experience as a whole. My thoughts on the routes were a but more rushed so I plan on taking my time with this post.

All in all I am extremely happy with this game. I understand why it’s often recommended as a first otome game to play (alongside Piofiore, Collar x Malice etc), and it was the first otome game for me as well. Graphics were beautiful and I enjoyed the overall flow of the game pretty well. I didn’t want to miss anything so I played everything from the beginning with all the guys. The common route being quite long got a little tedious by the end of the game, but I found it went quite quickly if I put the auto skip on until there were parts I hadn’t played before. The only times I didn’t use the skip function were the first run (obviously) and the last because I wanted to enjoy the full experience during Lupin’s route. Path of Genesis came in handy after I decided to replay couple of the routes after finishing the game.

The extras were quite funny and enjoyable. I thought all of them added something to the characters and revealed new sides of them. I don’t think I will ever recover from Van’s hotness or Saint playing dumb while making Cardia help him get dressed (bless her poor innocent soul). The event gallery is very handy too. I like that you can play the scenes or just look at the pretty pictures. I’m currently playing Future Blessings and I’m similarly excited about Holmes’ route (or Sholmes, whichever) and Delly’s room.

When it comes to characters, nothing went as I thought it would. My prediction was I would love Lupin and Fran the most. Wroooooong. In the common route I found Lupin very distant until I played his scenes on it. He is still sort of a favourite but a lot of that has to do with the anime. I ended up watching that from Crunchyroll and oh boy, I loved Lupin x Cardia in that. Now the anime and the game have fused in my head and I do like Lupin’s route. I wished it was longer though, because a lot of his route is taken by the non-romantic aspects of the plot. I still cried when they fell off Nautilus though.

Saint was a surprise entirely. During common route he was downright boring. Obviously during his own route it became incredibly clear why he was so distant. I love his eyes, expressions and voice acting. The angst was immense and there are so many possibilities for their life together post-game. Before I got to Saint’s route I was not looking forward to it at all. That’s why his route felt like being slapped in the face by a ton of emotions. I sobbed so much while playing that I was a mess by the time his route ended. Saint had a ton of character growth and he is one of my favourites, absolutely.

I had Fran marked as a likely favourite before I played. I love sweet and intelligent guys and was really looking forward to it. My thoughts have changed slightly from my initial opinion after playing his route. I ended up playing his route twice, once during the recommended order and once after finishing the whole game once. After first play through, I thought his route was sweet but lacked the angst level I had realised I loved. I also thought there was too much of ‘I’ll save you’. After second play through I will have to acknowledge my thoughts have changed. His route is still sugary sweet and there is a lot of saving involved, BUT there was more angst simmering underneath the surface than I had initially thought. All in all, I took a while for his route to grow on me but after that it was great.

Now Van was another surprise. He is so emotionally constipated, it was hard for me to imagine where the story would go. His route is absolutely brilliant. The angst is all there and Ripper is one of my favourite side characters of any games. His route has the most sexual tension out of all the routes (in my opinion). That notion is also amplified by the extra chapter. Cardia was fierce during this route. She is otherwise as well but it was the most visible to me during this one. Van has a lot of character growth, like Saint, and I feel like he could make Cardia very happy. On the flip-side there is so much potential for trauma bonding, considering Cardia and Van are both traumatised. I replayed Van’s route as well and loved it as much the second time, if not more.

Impey was my least favourite (sorry, Impey lovers). The reasons actually have very little do with him and more to do with me. He is cheery, cute and funny. But he flirts a lot and is so over the top with it, I find it hard to take it seriously. I was happy to find out more about Nemo, but that character annoyed me with how he spoke. Impey being a vampire was a surprise. Impey’s route had some loving moments and I think he is a lovely guy but sadly, he is not for me.

Then some random thoughts in the end. I’m excited for more scenes with Delly in Future Blessings. He is such a sweet boy who deserves all the love. Sisi is a little cutie too. Everytime he is on the screen, I swoon. I have started playing Future Blessings now too. I won’t get into that too much, but I have been thinking about doing an AU ending fanfic for Victor’s route in that. Additionally, I’ll be posting a load of screenshots I’ve taken once I go through them all. I might do some thoughts posts about Future Blessings as well.

[illgiveyouahint]

That's so many films! Which ones have been your favourite, the ones that have stayed with you the most? Have you watched only films or did any documentaries also make the watchlist? (if so, any that you'd particularly recommend?)

hiii darling!

Thanks for the ask, and may I wish you a happy new year? May your next year be full of memories and people that make you happy. May you see and maybe purchase some wonderful new sword!

As for the films. The number sounds impressive, but many of them are just short films. And let's be honest, my film numbers are nothing compared to your book numbers lol

This will get long I'm warning you 'cause once I start talking films it's hard to make me stop so putting it under read more

Yes, I've seen a lot of documentaries as well. I am considering doing a recommendation list for documentaries one of these days if anyone would be interested. I have talked about some of them here throughout the year as well. Released this year, I've seen 3 documentaries that I think are all interesting in their own way.

I've watched Fire of Love, which I think you'd actually enjoy. It's about two vulcanologists who truly loved volcanos, but also found love in each other. The documentary is a collection of their footage they've shot over the years, with a very relaxing commentary about their life. It's so lovely and calming, and you see all this footage of the volcanos up close and their dedication to it and just yeah, HIGHLY recommend.

The other two documentaries were good, but I don't think they're really for you unless you're more into the international politics. I watched the Navalny documentary which was fascinating to see as it follows him all through the poisoning and recovery, and you get to understand a bit more what this opposition leader is like as well as see how the Bellingcat (the investigative journalists) works in uncovering (usually Russian but not just them) crimes. And then I saw a short film called Ukrainian Queer Fighters for Freedom, which was a collection of interviews with queer people in Ukraine and their thoughts on how they think the country will change going forward in regard to queer rights. I've seen it as part of a queer film festival and the director was present and talked about it a bit and it was cool

I've watched a lot of older documentaries, but a lot of them were about various conflicts and injustices around the world and such, and idk if you'd be interested in those. But one more I will recommend to you since I think you might like it. It is called Meru. It's a fascinating film about three climbers who are trying to tackle this super hard to climb mountain and like it sounds like a boring topic, but it's actually absolutely batshit crazy. Like they fail at first but then go at it again and like no spoilers but holy shit all three of them are just insane for doing it. Truly.

As for feature films, there's many that have stayed with me. I've finally watched Minari, and it was as lovely and devastating as I expected it to be. Also, finally got around to watching Tokyo Godfathers, which is admittedly a bit problematic. The way they treat the trans character is...well of its time. But it's also at the same time incredibly humanizing towards its characters (who are all homeless) including the trans character. It's fun and weird, but also like a great Christmas film. Everything Everywhere All at Once is also as good as everyone claims it to be. It's like one of the three films released this year I've seen or even wanted to see tbh. My Happy Family was a true discovery for me, and I'm so glad Siiri recommended it to me. It's about this older Georgian mother who is a bit of an introvert which in a Georgian family is...well, it's not really normal to be quiet, let's say. And she suddenly decides to move out and find her own place, to the bewilderment of her family. It's not that she stopped loving them or anything. She just want her peace and quiet. It's really lovely, and I love the topic of older woman starting anew like this. So that one I'd also recommend to you. Then I watched a lot of czech/czechoslovak films and some of them were also quite impressive like Carriage to Vienna and Ikarie XB 1.

Yeah, so that's about it, I think. Thanks again for asking <3

[thequeenofsastiel]

KinnPorsche Episode 7 Review-In which TheQueenofSastiel comes to terms with the folly of expecting this dark af mafia show to have anything resembling healthy relationships

The main thing I liked about this episode was the fact that Porsche himself took a really dark turn, wantonly killing and kidnapping without any apparent guilt. Porsche's sweetness has been my main resisting factor when it comes to indulging in the darkness that is this show. But now that he's also become a dark character, I can turn on the part of myself that can enjoy a show like Hannibal(which remains the best show I've ever seen and if you like darkness and homoeroticism then hard recommend), and am thus enjoying this show and Kinn and Porsche's relationship a WHOLE lot more.

Anyways, I liked this episode a lot. Vegas is definitely one of my favorite characters. He's a villain, true, but I have a strong appreciation for the fact that he at least seems to treat his people very well. I'm always trash for powerful people who acknowledge the humanity and dignity of those with less power. I also can't help but really enjoy Porsche and Vegas's scenes, despite the fact that Vegas is a villain. I honestly find Vegas fascinating. I'm genuinely not entirely certain if his attempted seduction of Porsche is solely motivated by his desire fuck over Kinn, or if he actually likes Porsche, and I enjoy that ambiguity. It did make me laugh when Porsche asked how Vegas knew that he wanted to open a bar on the beach, and Vegas said that he always made sure to know everything about a person he was into. All I could think was, "You know that's not actually an answer, Porsche. Don't you? Don't you??"

Porchay and Kim are cute, though admittedly I find their relationship far less interesting than Kinn and Porsche’s.

Korn confuses me. He doesn't want Kinn to have feelings for Porsche, and yet he isn't firing Porsche or even reassigning him. His behavior doesn't make sense.

Also I don't think I'm ever going to get over him cutting an apple on a PORCELAIN plate. What the fuck, bro? Cutting boards are a thing.

I find it amusing that Kinn, who so far appears to be doing his best to please his father, proceeds to spend the rest of the episode after that scene being incredibly possessive of Porsche, doing, as far as I can tell, absolutely nothing to resist his feelings.

Now that I'm indulging in my inner darkness(thank you for that, show), I'm not going to pretend I didn't absolutely love Porsche and Kinn in the episode. They were intense and wild, though Kinn definitely has a fuckton of softness for Porsche. I liked this:

This tiny smile at Porsche’s naiveté was very cute. I'm also enjoying Kinn's possessiveness of Porsche:

I found it peculiar that Kinn grabbed Porsche’s hand and pressed it against his crotch since, as far as I'm aware, the only time they've done anything other than kissing was when Kinn raped Porsche in ep 4. Though Porsche didn't seem to remotely mind. So I've gotta guess that they've had sex in between then and when Porsche kissed Kinn in ep 6.

It was very interesting that Kinn apparently ordered Pete to spy on Vegas and Porsche. I'm curious if that was more motivated by a lack of trust in Porsche or a lack of trust in Vegas. Though of course I'm sure it was both, I wonder which was the stronger point.

There were literally no women at that party, which I find extremely intriguing. I would think that a celebration of macho violent achievement would involve women, because parties like that usually do, so the lack of them is notable.

I didn't love Kinn slapping Porsche in the bathroom, but Porsche slapped him as well later on, and much harder, so 🤷‍♀️

I made a post about this earlier, but I find the fact that Kinn's response to Porsche suggesting that Kinn might kill him like he did Tawan was to call Porsche a slut baffling. Like, what? How are those two things related? Their whole encounter in the bathroom was intense and wild and unhealthy and captivating. I've watched it five times and still not gotten bored or any less confused by their behavior.

10/10 on the episode. Every part of it was enjoyable, even the parts that were confusing. I'm stoked that the next ep starts in five minutes.

[woollenpharaohs]

“What the heart is full of, the mouth overflows. Stephen Dewaele of Soulwax is quick to talk anyway, but when it comes to DVDs, he shifts up a few gears. From 'The West Wing' to 'The Cremaster Cycle' to 'Triumph The Insult Comic Dog' – 'Sometimes I sitand watch and just think: What the fuck!'

I HAVE FOUR DVD PLAYERS: one in my laptop, one in my living room, one in my bedroom, and one in my bathroom. I wake up with it and I go to sleep with it – I usually watch it at night, after my daily news feed on BBC World, Nederland 3 and Canvas. I don't have much time, but I can easily get four or five DVDs a week. Sometimes it's more, sometimes it's less – it all depends on exactly where I am, and how busy I am. Series at the moment: The Sopranos are a poison, because they are insanely addictive. 'One more and then I'll go to sleep…' 'Another one to unlearn…' And before I know it, it's seven hours later and I have to get up again. With The West WingI had that very bad, almost sickly. Incredibly fascinating to see how American politics works – and it seems to be fairly truthful too, because the screenwriter was an intern at the White House under Bill Clinton. Oh, and do you know Arrested Development ? You should absolutely check that! It's about a filthy rich family in America and the humor is somewhat reminiscent of Curb Your Enthusiasm – also an incredible recommendation, by the way.

NO IDEA HOW MANY DVDs I HAVE EXACTLY, but I'm estimating a thousand or so. According to my girlfriend I'm a freak in the making - luckily it's not as bad as with records, but during our last tour I still bought 50 DVDs. In most I now also know exactly where I need to be in major cities. I'm going to New York For example, always go to a shop that specializes in weird stuff that you can't find anywhere. There I buy things like The Cremaster Cycle by Matthew Barney or bootlegs by Kraftwerk. Tokyo is also a great city to buy DVDs because you'll find a lot of things there that they don't have the rights to in Europe yet. Gainsbourg movies à la Cannabis or Le Pacha – I even bought a double DVD of Claude François once. That really annoys me with DVDs: all that hassle with those region codes and such. Isn't that of this time anymore? The entertainment industry really treats people like idiots. "All buy DVDs in your own region well" My DVD players are all multi-region – cracked by an acquaintance. Am I hurting someone with that? Oh no? Fortunately, we will be rid of that in a few years, because then everyone will be able to download their films. That can't happen fast enough for me – unlimited supply, minimal fee, everything directly on a memory card. 

ON TOUR I ALWAYS MAKE A SELECTION FOR THE OTHERS. The last thing I showed was Triumph The Insult Comic Dog – a Late Night hand puppet with Conan O'Brien, extremely crude but implausibly funny. And everyone was also deeply impressed by Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy and Comandante, Oliver Stone's documentary about Fidel Castro. I don't put porn in such a selection, no, we have our own specialist on tour for that. But I usually find it incredibly boring – during Sexecutioners, a film we recently bought at the Reperbahn, I fell asleep during the first blowjob. (laughs) What I can recommend to everyone is the Criterion label. They release old movies on double DVDs with an incredible amount of extras – recently I bought The Man Who Fell To Earth with David Bowie. I buy almost everything from Criterion blindly, and some things I really wait for. For example, they urgently need to release a performance by Nicolas Roeg: Mick Jagger has a part and Ry Cooder wrote the soundtrack – I wrote my thesis about it at school at the time. 

IF I HAVE ONE GUILTY PLEASURE, it's: DVDs from bad eighties bands, Tears For Fears and all that. A few months ago Tiga gave me Silver Blue Lining, a documentary about Duran Duran's heydays. The ego of those guys, who think they're on top of the world: fe-no-me-nal, ten times funnier than Some Kind Of Monster by Metallica. You're looking at that, and you're like, 'What the fuck? That simply does not exist!” – but it all really happens. Anyway, I watch a lot of music DVDs, even good ones. Recently: No Direction Home by Martin Scorsese, about Bob Dylan, and It's All Gone, Pete Tong, a kind of Spinal Tap about corporate DJs. Less interesting for people who have never been to Ibiza, perhaps, but very recognizable. I also find The Directors Series very impressive, with those DVDs from video clip directors. The first I had three volumes for a while – Spike Jonze, Michel Gondry and Chris Cunningham – and recently bought the collected clips of Anton Corbijn and Mark Romanek. What He Did To Hurtby Johnny Cash! That's no longer a clip, that's just… art. We ourselves have been brooding on a DVD for a while, I urgently need to discuss this with the record company. We have tons of footage just begging to be released – you'll be hearing from [rest of article cannot be accessed].”

- Focus Knack, 15/11/2005 (Translated with google translate). 

[leffee]

sim vinnie and Sunil are awesome!

how come they started doing illegal things? It’s amazing was there something that started it all?

it almost seems like a Bonnie and Clyde thing!

Glad you like them. As for illegal things, well, some of those (namely but not only having slaves in the basement) weren't my ideas. You see, there's this youtuber - CallMeKevin, and he has absolutely hilarious and incredibly entertaining sims series. The main sim there is Jim Pickens <- dear leader, that's who he is. And Kevin plays Sims in a completely different way than most, it's hard to explain, but basically he, or should I say Jim, does a lot of illegal things. He was the one who had slaves in the basement first, and the one who inspired me to do the same. He also kills a lot of sims or uses them for his advantage. In one word - it's awesome. I know it's often annoying when some know-it-all recommends something or someone to watch, but genuinely, if you're ever bored or that made you curious enough, watch CallMeKevin's sims playlist, you will not be dissapointed.

Oh yeah, and Jim Pickens also has his own cult, of course. Not only in the sims but also in actual viewers, and I am one of them. Praise the dear leader. Like genuinely go watch it and you'll understand uuuu

Aaand that's why Vinnie and Sunil do that, because I wanted them to and got inspired.

[chicagolive]

Hi I’m so incredibly sorry this is getting to you so late!

I know what you mean about like booktok and stuff sometimes their recs are awful but I’ve read other stuff by Andy Weir and really liked it so I can tell you he very much knows what he’s talking about when it comes to space travel! When he was bored he used to plan missions to Mars and that’s how he wrote the Martian! So theres science and technical talk sometimes in that book so I’m somewhat expect that in Hail Mary!

I’m quite shit a listening to new music too but I’m always looking for more! I’ve been meaning to listen to Rina so I’m so glad you recommended that! Loved the voice so I’m excited to hear more!

I started collecting vinyl in 2020 too! It may be cliche to say but my pink Harry Styles - Harry Styles album is probably my prized vinyl simply because it took me forever to find and I found it quite cheap compared to what everyone else was selling it for! The most vinyls for one artist I have right now is one direction and so far the only double I have is for made in the am! I have a black one and a blue one! I’m hoping to get Louis’ album soon so I’m very excited!

Those are lovely colors! Great holiday movie for sure!! Ooooo, art! What’s your favorite artist? And do you have any favorite like paintings/sculptures? What kind of art do you normally create? I hope the block leaves ya be soon and you start creating again! Do you have any certain media of art you like to create the most?

Here’s another speed round!! What’s your go to comfort outfit/piece of clothing? What’s the best show you’ve watched this year? Do you have any pets? Annnnnd what’s your favorite season?

Hope you’re having an absolutely lovely night and that the day treated you well!!

-🎄❄️

Hello, hun!! ✨

That’s perfectly fine!! I totally understand! Life gets in the way. Hope your day/night is treating you well!!

Ahhhh, I see!! Well, as long as they know what they’re talking about within the novel, it sounds like a good read to me lol. I’ll have to give him a read next time I’m in the bookstore.

You have a pink self-titled? Cool, cool, cool, cool!! (Adds to rob list lol). The entire 1d discography!? Love that for you!! Is there one in particular you play the most? Out of all the boys, I’d say I listen to self-titled more than any of the other boys!! Idk, it just sounds so nice on record.

The thing about art is I love to admire and appreciate it, but I’m shit at actually remembering the artists names and when they created them 😅. Last night, I was looking at some photos I took when I was in Italy back in 2020 and I found some pictures of two of Botticelli’s most recognizable work (Primavera and The Birth of Venus). I’d probably say them for the meantime!!

I minored in sculpture in college, so I’d say I have an appreciation for the 3D arts, but lately I’ve been getting into painting/drawing!! Back at the end of 2020, I made a portrait of Louis trying to get back into the artistic spirit, which worked for a little, but haven’t really been able to get back into it. Hopefully the new year brings a spark with it lol.

Speed Round Questions: comfort outfit/piece of clothing? I’m a Jean-on-Jean person lol. If I can complete an outfit with a matching pair of jeans and Jean jacket, I’ll opt for that!! Best show this year? I’d probably say Heartstopper!! I read the series beforehand and an absolutely loved it! So when it came out, I watched it all in one sitting, even though there were only 8 episodes for the premier. Also, the 2nd season on Young Royals came out at the beginning of November which I really liked as well. I’m not very good at starting new series, like a lot of people lol. Is there any show you are watching atm that you recommend!? Pets? Sadly, I do not she any pets. I wish lol. One day, I’d say. I really like cocker spaniels, so I’d probably have that as a pet if I could!! Favorite season? I’d say the transition between summer and fall, where it’s not as hot to wear shorts anymore, but isn’t cold enough to have to bundle up under multiple layers!! Very nice middle!! 🎄✨

[do-notfolow]

some things that comforted me in 2021

because it sucked a lot but these things made it a little less unbearable.

songs:

seven by Taylor Swift - it's my favourite song of hers. I love everything about it, the cozy production, the nostalgic feel of it, how warm her voice sounds, the second verse.

Mama's Gun by Glass Animals - why is a song about murder my comfort song? I wish I knew. All I know is that one time I fell asleep with headphones in and woke up to this song and it was the warmest I've ever felt. Something about a woman being so terrified of herself just speaks to me.

Jealousy Jealousy by Olivia Rodrigo - It's such a mood, you know? There aren't enough songs that talk about all the envy and comparison that go on when you're a teen (or, at least, none that I know about. Please recommend me similar songs!). Screaming the lyrics to the bridge is very therapeutic, I recommend.

books:

The Raven Cycle by Maggie Stiefvater - I love loving books. I love it when I read a book and I am entranced by it. I'm obsessed with every single line in this series, Stiefvater has such a way with words. I'm deeply in love with the characters, a maddening, all-encompassing kind of in love. I've made playlists for this book series, wrote poems about it, cried about it. I will never move on from it. Adam Parrish my beloved <3

Rebecca by Daphne De Maurier - I didn't expect this book to speak to me so much, but I read it and felt like it was written for me and me only. The writing was so beautiful and enchanting.

Winterkeep by Kristin Cashore - this book has 5 POV characters and all of them were genuinely interesting. I never knew I could love and care so much for a fictional, anxious sea monster who collects random things humans lost at sea, or a blue telepathic, clever fox, but I love them very very much. Also, Giddon loml.

Tv Shows:

Bojack Horseman - I started watching it because of a post that said the show handled depression so well... I did not expect this. There's nothing like a talking horse to make you realize you're fundamentallly unloved and no matter how much you love someone it will never be enough because you're a piece of shit.

Locke & Key - this is a really good fantasy show, with a very well-executed concept and well-written, complex characters. Dodge/Gabe is hot and what could be better than a sexy villian? Bode's the only smart character in the show and he's an absolute icon.

Haikyuu - it's just so cute. I don't know how a show that's solely about volleyball could be so intereting, but it is. And it's adorable. And inspiring. And beautiful. Hinata's optimism should be annoying, but it's endearing and I wish I had his spirits.

Movies:

Bo Burnham: Inside - This movie gave me existential crisis and, tbh, I'm grateful for that <3. I watched it about 5 times and I will watch it more and it doesn't seem like I'm gonna get tired of it. All Eyes On Me is, unfortunately, kind of a mood.

The Lovely Bones - again, I don't know why media pieces about murder comfort me, but this movie was fantastic. Was I terrified throughout the entire movie? Hell yeah, but did I find it incredibly sweet and touching? Also yes. The colour schemes and aesthetic in this movie are very, very beautiful.

Little Women - tbh I thought I'd find this movie boring, but turns out it's very moving and heartening. I can't wait to read the book. "I'm not afraid of storms, for I'm learning how to sail my ship"

Special thanks for Halsey and Hozier and their stunning music.

[imkylotrash]

What Goes Around

Pairing: Hardin Scott x reader

Request: Could I please request an imagine/fic with Hardin Scott x Reader and basically Hardin of course has his bad boy reputation but this intrigues the reader. She is his complete opposite and finds his rudeness quite funny. Hardin is a little too mean to her one time and makes her cry. It doesn’t occur to Hardin that she likes him and by that point he feels like he has lost his chance to get to know her because of his.. ‘wicked’ charm? You can choose the ending. Anonymous

Tagging: @bitchwhytho​ @music-of-melody​​

He’s watching you give your coffee order and it makes you smile. Everywhere you go, you seem to run into each other. At first, you’d just steal glances then go your separate ways but then it turned into “hello”. He made the first move and asked if you should have your coffee together one day. Ever since than you’d made polite conversation when you ran into each other and you had to admit that something intrigued you about the tattooed boy who refused to care about anyone other than himself. You couldn’t exactly relate to his perspective on life but you wanted to know more, to understand the boy who considered the world a cruel place rather than an opportunity to happy days. 

“This seat taken?” you ask standing with a hot cup of coffee in one hand and a book in the other. The “Red Queen” series have become something of an obsession for you after finishing the first book. You never thought you’d stray from the classics but lately, YA books had been catching your eye. 

“I see you’re still on the third book,” he smiles and in the same moment letting you know how he feels about YA books. You don’t take it too hard considering he’s not even willing to admit his love for books for anyone other than you. 

“I’m taking my time and enjoying the words.” You have a tendency to get too invested and rush through a book to get to the ending meaning you miss a lot of the little Easter eggs along the way. You’re trying to change that. 

“Hey, no judgement from me.” He’s lying but it’s a cute lie so you’ll allow it. Once you’ve finished your coffee, you stand up grabbing your things. You have exactly ten minutes before your class start but you like to get there early in case you need to do some last-minute preparations. Hardin remains seated and you remain neutral in regards to his lack of motivation when it comes to college. 

I’ll be going classes now. Want to come?” Okay, maybe not that neutral. He shakes his head smiling and you know what that means. It takes three days before you run into him again. This time at the library where you reach for the same book which sounds completely absurd and something that would only happen in one of your books. It’s a cute moment though. 

“I guess great minds think alike,” you say and he scoffs.

“Please. You wish you were as clever as me.” He offers you the book about to sit down when he spots some of his friends outside. You know he’s been a little vague about who you are considering just how different you are to them and frankly, you don’t mind. Hardin is an interesting character because there’s more to him than just the casual alcoholic teen while the people he surrounds himself with at those frat parties really don’t have much else going on for them. You went one time and you’d never been more bored in your life. 

“I should go,” he says Within minutes he’s out the door walking in the direction away from his “friends”. After that you don’t spot him for a while or maybe he’s avoiding you to avoid the questions his friends will inevitable have. Either way, you find yourself missing his sarcastic comments. You hadn’t realised just how much of an impression he’d made on you until he wasn’t around. But he comes back to you eventually. 

“Hey,” he says when he spots you at the coffee house. 

“I thought you’d moved city,” you tease pushing out the chair across from you with your foot. He sits down sliding a book across the table. 

“As an apology,” he grins. You turn the book over to see the cover and you can’t help but smile. 

“You remembered.” One of the first conversations between you and Hardin had been about ecocriticism and a book called “The Road” that you’d borrowed from the library more times than you could count. You’d discussed the topic in class where your professor had recommended this book and now Hardin had gotten it for you. 

“You wouldn’t shut up about the book for at least five hours. How could I not?” He shrugs it off like it’s no big deal but it still means a lot to you. Now you could read the book whenever you felt like it. And he’d gotten the original cover rather than the movie cover. It would’ve been the perfect gift if his friends hadn’t shown up and ruined everything. You see the change in him the second they enter the coffee house. 

“Hardin, who’s this?” Jace asks with hungry eyes making you feel incredibly uncomfortable. 

“Just a friend,” Hardin offers not wanting to give any information to these people. 

“Sure, friend. Do you feel the same way, honey?” Jace asks making the rest of the guys snicker. Before you have a chance to answer, Hardin opens his mouth and ruins everything. 

“Yes, friend. I mean look at her. Not exactly my type, is it? I mean, could it get anymore vanilla?” This earns him a high five from one of the guys but it cracks your heart. You’ve never thought much about your close or the way you looked because you thought the inside counted a hell of a lot more than the outside. But hearing that the idea of being with you seemed so ludicrous hurt more than you liked to admit. 

“I should get going.” You don’t look at Hardin when you leave and you don’t bring the book with you. If this is how he thinks of you then you don’t want anything from him. And it’s not even the fact that he considers you a friend. If that’s all it was, you’d be fine. It’s how easy it was for him to degrade you that really hurt. You tell yourself you won’t cry but it’s a lost battle as you head home. Unfortunately, you don’t reach home before he catches up to you.

“Leave me alone, Hardin,” you say picking up the pace. You’re determined to reach your apartment without stopping but of course, you can’t help yourself when it’s Hardin.

“Are you mad at me?” 

“Mad at you? Of course, I’m mad at you!” you yell not caring who hears you at this point.

“You of all people should realise what it’s like to be judged on the way you look. I like the way I look and I absolutely refuse to let you make me feel bad about it!” You don’t care if he said it because of his friends or not, it’s the fact that it came to him so easily. That means he’s thought it before regardless of the situation at the coffee house. 

“It was a joke!” he yells back opting for defensive rather than just apologise. You’re not doing this. You turn around and this time he doesn’t follow you. It’s weeks before you dare return to the coffee house. You don’t want to meet him again. Instead you dive head first into the universe of Jane Austen thinking he could’ve been your Mr. Darcy with his sour attitude and soft spot for you but it didn’t turn out that way. But your need for good coffee eventually win over your fear of seeing him again. The plan is in, order, pay and leave. It’s just not that simple once you’re inside. 

“You forgot this.” He places “The Road” in front of you as you’re waiting for your coffee. You can’t believe he’s held onto to it since that day. You figured he would’ve just chucked it in the bin. 

“I’m really sorry for what I said. It was rude and thoughtless. You deserve better.” It’s a good apology but you can’t help but think what the insult will be the next time his friends catch you together. 

“You’re right. I deserve better.” You get your coffee and head outside. 

“Throw me a bone here. I said I was sorry.” Of course, Hardin follows you outside refusing to let this go. 

“Hardin, you’re only sorry because I called you out on it. You don’t actually care that it hurt me.” He’s not the first guy who thought he could walk all over you and he won’t be the last but you refuse to accept that treatment. You deserve a lot better than that. 

“I’m sorry because it hurt you. I didn’t think you’d read so much into it,” he defends himself making it clear to you that it’s a pointless discussion. He’s not going to understand why what he said was hurtful despite his own appearance and the comments he’s received. 

“How could I not? I’m sitting there thinking we might have a shot and then you pull the rug out from under me. I’m not playing these games with you.” 

“What?” You don’t bother repeating yourself instead using this moment of shock to hurry away. You manage to avoid him for another week before he corners you on campus. 

“You can’t just throw something like that out in the world and then leave. It’s been going round and round in my head.” He has a hand on each side of you leaning against the wall. It’s effective for keeping you in place and distracting you from why you’re actually upset with him. 

“I never thought you’d like me like that. Shit, I would’ve done things very differently if I ever thought I had a chance.” This time you’re the one in shock. You didn’t think he’d put so much thought into what you said last time. 

“What would you have done differently?” Despite vowing to yourself that you’re done with Hardin, you find yourself curious once again. This bad boy persona with a loving man hidden inside seems like an impossible paradox.

“I would’ve kept you well clear of those idiots from the frat house. Bought you flowers maybe. Taken you to dinner. Bought you a hell of lot more books.” You don’t want to forgive him but it’s hard to think when he’s this close to you. 

“I can start now if you’d like.” He places a hand on your cheek and his touch gives you chills. You inhale sharply telling yourself not to give into him but your body has already thrown in the white towel. He leans down stopping inches from your lips. 

“I really am sorry. It won’t happen again.” Instead of answering, you lean up closing the gap between you. It’s the first kiss but definitely not the last.