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#i am probably going to delete this in a few hours but jfjfjrjgjrjfjdkdkskskekrjufudhsnfkmskdjfbdjdjd
trapper-faggot · 2 years
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Nothing like being aware of how pathetic you are while messaging your boyfriend
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orionangeline · 3 years
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When my hair gets greasy I turn into a kpop boy
Evidence:
I did a lil photoshoot. @official-frog-god14 was right the hair really does make me look kpop ish
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I would like to say that none of these are how I actually wear my hair, though
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gresiniracing · 3 years
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satoransky · 3 years
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#so this is uhm super random and personal and i'll probs delete it in the morning#if i even remember abt it which i probably won't#but uhm yeah i've been questioning my gender a lot the past few months and all i know is im not cis for sure but like#i genuinely just have no idea of what i am or what i want or what i have to do#or maybe i do and im trying to convince myself i dont bc im scared?#but either way#rn i feel like im not gonna truly be happy until i figure it out? no matter what i do?#like the best things could be happening to me and i'll think it doesn't matter bc i know that it'll pass and it wont bring me real happiness#like im going to the barça game tomorrow#and i'm going to the camp nou for the first time after a year and a half in the first game that'll allow fans again#and i'm like yeah that cool and im sure it'll be fun but imagine how fun your life would be and how happy you would be if you got to just +#+ be yourself?#like all these moments are just like painkillers which numb the pain for a few hours and then the pain will be back#and i know that when it happens and when im there i will be happy. every time i step into that stupid stadium are some of the happiest#moments of my lifes and it always feels like being home#so its stupid to even question it??? but also i have this same feeling for everything in my life?#like yeah i have to find a job and then i'll be happy or yeah i need to do this and then i'll be happy#but now i know i probably won't until i figure that out#none of this makes absolutely any sense BUT#anyways JSNDDJSJ i guess i needed to get it out otherwise it'd be eating me all night long#pls ignore this#idek what i said at the beginning and im not sure i want to know ajsndhdd#delete later
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izzy-b-hands · 4 years
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solo sprints and writing my first fic for Smile I think is the ticket for tonight. There are good convos going on all over places tonight, but I don’t feel like I can keep up 
#text post#and also in a few spots every time I chime in or try to start interactions abt stuff folks either act like I didn't say anything#or just ignore that I tried to start a convo#and it's whatever cuz folks are probably just busy#but at the same time then you watch them go have a like hour long convo w/everyone else and it's like...ok fair enough#but maybe just be honest and tell me you aren't interested in what I'm saying#and I can delete my parts of the convo and fucking dip ok lmao#like even this am I tried starting a convo abt a fanfic trope I fuckin hate but some folks I know love#based off of a new song I found that I like and wanted to share#and radio fucking silence is all I got#like I'm trying to be into what other ppl are into and trying to widen up the fences of possible convos but then nothing comes of it#and I'm left wondering how I fucked up#even my therapist didn't quite get it and mentioned she wished she could talk to some of the folks I hang with to get their perspective#she told me to just keep trying but goddamn is it tiring#because you end up trying to be there for everyone and be into what everyone else loves#and be supportive and stuff and I do it all genuinely#but then when I hope to see some back for me it comes from like the two ppl I know I can safely count on and talk to#and no one else seems to notice me#and it's like fucking being in middle school and high school again#told I'm a part of the group and they're so glad to have me!#but then I talk and the group turns to look at me with grins and giggles and no one says a word and someone starts a new convo#and this is all dumb as fuck to be upset abt because I used to feel ok being alone#but then I made the mistake of getting used to talking more with ppl and now I fucked myself over
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starsinyourskyes · 4 years
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currently going through the five stages of grief over a fricking fictional character
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formallyoctobergods · 4 years
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I'm actually going to be sad if cities start to die out due to the high street becoming less important and delivery and internet shopping becoming the normal. I like going out shopping and I like city centres. I feel like things becoming too focused on data and the internet we're going to be moving further into a capitalist society and monopolies will become more common.
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pickledeyes · 4 years
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twopoppies · 3 years
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Hi Gina! Do you think you'll be able to share some of these receipts?
Definitely. I just am doing my best to try and only share ones I think are legit. I've been chatting with this person and they sent me a video they took that night, and have answered all my questions, so as best I can tell, this is the truth. I deleted some extraneous details just to make it a bit shorter (emphasis mine).
Ok so September 2019 me and my girlfriend went to visit her brother in London for a couple days and we were supposed to go to one of her brother’s friends party right after we landed. It was a three hour flight and we thought “ok we go to the hotel, take a quick shower, dress up and then we go met your brother at his place so he can drive us to the party”. [...] Long story short, we were both exhausted, stressed and decided to get a little drunk and take a little something too you know 😂. Few hours later, she got her phone and a lot of texts from her brother popped up and he was incredibly pissed bc we were late and forgot to tell him we wouldn’t make it to the party so he just sent the address and said “meet me there”.
We were bored and decided to go, got into an uber (while we where both really fucking high) and went to the bloody party. It was a really fancy neighborhood with all these huge mansions and shit, the ubers phone died on the way but he said we were close and he was going to ask for information at a some guardhouse. He stopped and asked the guard if he knew about some party nearby and the guy said it was there so we thought “ok I guess?” again we were tripping balls man and not thinking clearly. The guard guided us through and it was this huge compound with really massive houses. The uber stopped in front of a house and there was another guy with a list in his hand, asked for our names and it wasn’t there so my girlfriend who was already really pissed said “no my brother invited me, he knows the guy whose party this is, they’ve been friends for years he has to be on the list” and the guy went “oh it’s Tom something-we-couldn’t-make-up” and we were “yeah sure that’s him” so the guy let us in.
We walked in and I can’t even begin to explain what it was like inside. We started to look for her brother and there was quite a lot of people there but the place was huge. Again I was really really high and everyone I looked at seemed kinda familiar but that was expected since it was her brother's friends so I probably met them at some point somewhere else or something right? I kept telling myself that and my gf seemed cool too so I thought what the hell, it’s a party lets party fuck it. We went outside to this beautiful garden and there was like four guys sitting around smoking and drinking and laughing and we sat there and started to talk and drink and the rest is a fucking blur to be honest. [The hosts] seemed very domestic with each other you know, it was hard not to notice they were together and thats actually why we thought we were at the right place, because her brother’s friend was also married to a guy so when they would whisper on each others ear, call each other little pet names and a have little quick peck here and there we thought ok we’re at the right place. They also had pictures of them together around the house and both of them thanked us for being there when we were leaving (just really fucking polite bc we were strangersss). I don’t think the party was for anything in particular, everyone was just hanging out but then again I can barely remember what I was wearing so 😂
Next day we woke up and went to her brother's and he went “where the hell were you? I waited all night and you never show” so we were like “ok dumbasses ended up at the wrong fucking party haha” and we just laughed it off. Several months go by and I’m telling oomfs this story and I showed her the only video I had of that day (you know those videos you make by accident where you just record peoples shoes for a couple of seconds?) and she mentioned that one of guy's arms had the exact same tattoo as “a guy from one direction” and I ironically asked “well maybe it was him who knows. Are any of them gay? Because two guys were hosting the party and they were a couple” and she said none of them were gay and all of them had girlfriends so it probably wasn’t them. Later that day i was talking to my girlfriend and she said “imagine how crazy it would be if we went to some famous guy's house by accident and find out they were gay”. And I had that stuck in my head for days and then I thought “what better place to know about fandom gossip than tumblr” (I had one for supernatural lol)
(important to point out that I did know one direction but just by name I wasn’t a fan and couldn’t tell Niall and Zayn apart. I literally knew nothing about them) so I went into tumblr and started to stalk a couple of blogs about 1D and read a little about them and all but nothing about two gay guys. Scrolled past some more blogs and I found Gabi and a few masterposts and I read them all in a day like a crazy person and I was so sure it was them at that fucking party but I got no pictures with anyone on my phone to compare so I waited for my gf to get home and I showed her pictures of both of them and told her about everything I read and she was pretty sure it was them too especially after we saw some videos of them. Also I don’t think they knew they didn’t know us because by the time we were leaving we were a little more sober so I remember we mentioned my gfs brother and they answered like they totally knew him 😭
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distilled-prose · 3 years
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Holly Butcher posted her advice to the world, 24 hours before she died of cancer. This was her message... A bit of life advice from Hol: “It’s a strange thing to realise and accept your mortality at 26 years young. It’s just one of those things you ignore. The days tick by and you just expect they will keep on coming; Until the unexpected happens. I always imagined myself growing old, wrinkled and grey- most likely caused by the beautiful family (lots of kiddies) I planned on building with the love of my life. I want that so bad it hurts. That’s the thing about life; It is fragile, precious and unpredictable and each day is a gift, not a given right. I’m 27 now. I don’t want to go. I love my life. I am happy.. I owe that to my loved ones. But the control is out of my hands. I haven’t started this ‘note before I die’ so that death is feared – I like the fact that we are mostly ignorant to it’s inevitability.. Except when I want to talk about it and it is treated like a ‘taboo’ topic that will never happen to any of us.. That’s been a bit tough. I just want people to stop worrying so much about the small, meaningless stresses in life and try to remember that we all have the same fate after it all so do what you can to make your time feel worthy and great, minus the bullshit. I have dropped lots of my thoughts below as I have had a lot of time to ponder life these last few months. Of course it’s the middle of the night when these random things pop in my head most! 1) Those times you are whinging about ridiculous things (something I have noticed so much these past few months), just think about someone who is really facing a problem. Be grateful for your minor issue and get over it. It’s okay to acknowledge that something is annoying but try not to carry on about it and negatively effect other people’s days. 2) Once you do that, get out there and take a freaking big breath of that fresh Aussie air deep in your lungs, look at how blue the sky is and how green the trees are; It is so beautiful. Think how lucky you are to be able to do just that – breathe. 3) You might have got caught in bad traffic today, or had a bad sleep because your beautiful babies kept you awake, or your hairdresser cut your hair too short. Your new fake nails might have got a chip, your boobs are too small, or you have cellulite on your arse and your belly is wobbling. Let all that shit go.. I swear you will not be thinking of those things when it is your turn to go. It is all SO insignificant when you look at life as a whole. I’m watching my body waste away right before my eyes with nothing I can do about it and all I wish for now is that I could have just one more Birthday or Christmas with my family, or just one more day with my partner and dog. Just one more. 4) I hear people complaining about how terrible work is or about how hard it is to exercise – Be grateful you are physically able to. Work and exercise may seem like such trivial things … until your body doesn’t allow you to do either of them. I tried to live a healthy life, in fact, that was probably my major passion. Appreciate your good health and functioning body- even if it isn’t your ideal size. Look after it and embrace how amazing it is. Move it and nourish it with fresh food. Don’t obsess over it. 5) Remember there are more aspects to good health than the physical body.. work just as hard on finding your mental, emotional and spiritual happiness too. That way you might realise just how insignificant and unimportant having this stupidly portrayed perfect social media body really is.. While on this topic, delete any account that pops up on your news feeds that gives you any sense of feeling shit about yourself. Friend or not.. Be ruthless for your own well-being. 6) Be grateful for each day you don’t have pain and even the days where you are unwell with man flu, a sore back or a sprained ankle, accept it is shit but be thankful it isn’t life threatening and will go away. 7) Whinge less, people! .. And help each other more. 📷 Give, give, give. It is true that you gain
more happiness doing things for others than doing them for yourself. I wish I did this more. Since I have been sick, I have met the most incredibly giving and kind people and been the receiver of the most thoughtful and loving words and support from my family, friends and strangers; More than I could I ever give in return. I will never forget this and will be forever grateful to all of these people. 9) It is a weird thing having money to spend at the end.. when you’re dying. It’s not a time you go out and buy material things that you usually would, like a new dress. It makes you think how silly it is that we think it is worth spending so much money on new clothes and ‘things’ in our lives. Buy your friend something kind instead of another dress, beauty product or jewellery for that next wedding. 1. No-one cares if you wear the same thing twice 2. It feels good. Take them out for a meal, or better yet, cook them a meal. Shout their coffee. Give/ buy them a plant, a massage or a candle and tell them you love them when you give it to them. 10) Value other people’s time. Don’t keep them waiting because you are shit at being on time. Get ready earlier if you are one of those people and appreciate that your friends want to share their time with you, not sit by themselves, waiting on a mate. You will gain respect too! Amen sister. 11) This year, our family agreed to do no presents and despite the tree looking rather sad and empty (I nearly cracked Christmas Eve!), it was so nice because people didn’t have the pressure of shopping and the effort went into writing a nice card for each other. Plus imagine my family trying to buy me a present knowing they would probably end up with it themselves.. strange! It might seem lame but those cards mean more to me than any impulse purchase could. Mind you, it was also easier to do in our house because we had no little kiddies there. Anyway, moral of the story- presents are not needed for a meaningful Christmas. Moving on. 12) Use your money on experiences.. Or at least don’t miss out on experiences because you spent all your money on material shit. 13) Put in the effort to do that day trip to the beach you keep putting off. Dip your feet in the water and dig your toes in the sand. Wet your face with salt water. 14) Get amongst nature. 15) Try just enjoying and being in moments rather than capturing them through the screen of your phone. Life isn’t meant to be lived through a screen nor is it about getting the perfect photo.. enjoy the bloody moment, people! Stop trying to capture it for everyone else. Random rhetorical question. Are those several hours you spend doing your hair and make up each day or to go out for one night really worth it? I’ve never understood this about females 📷. 16) Get up early sometimes and listen to the birds while you watch the beautiful colours the sun makes as it rises. 17) Listen to music.. really listen. Music is therapy. Old is best. 18) Cuddle your dog. Far out, I will miss that. 19) Talk to your friends. Put down your phone. Are they doing okay? 20) Travel if it’s your desire, don’t if it’s not. 21) Work to live, don’t live to work. Seriously, do what makes your heart feel happy. 22) Eat the cake. Zero guilt. 23) Say no to things you really don’t want to do. 24) Don’t feel pressured to do what other people might think is a fulfilling life.. you might want a mediocre life and that is so okay. 25) Tell your loved ones you love them every time you get the chance and love them with everything you have. 26) Also, remember if something is making you miserable, you do have the power to change it – in work or love or whatever it may be. Have the guts to change. You don’t know how much time you’ve got on this earth so don’t waste it being miserable. I know that is said all the time but it couldn’t be more true. Anyway, that’s just this one young gals life advice. Take it or leave it, I don’t mind! Oh and one last thing, if you can, do a good deed for humanity (and myself) and start regularly donating blood. It will make you feel good with
the added bonus of saving lives. I feel like it is something that is so overlooked considering every donation can save 3 lives! That is a massive impact each person can have and the process really is so simple. Blood donation (more bags than I could keep up with counting) helped keep me alive for an extra year - a year I will be forever grateful that I got to spend it here on Earth with my family, friends and dog. A year I had some of the greatest times of my life. ..’Til we meet again. Hol Xoxo”
anyway, there it is
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yesimwriting · 3 years
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Dying Starlight
A/n: i dont think an audience for this exists?? ik it’s not shadow and bone related, but ive been reading red queen and i wanted to try writing maven and ive been playing with this idea. umm...on the off-chance that there is an audience for this i do think of this as more of a series but i’ll probably end up deleting this lol 
(Series?) Summary: reader is a childhood friend of Mare’s who isn’t officially part of the Scarlet Guard but gets captured by Maven. As a prisoner, she feels like her mind is being messed with as she begins to see a more human side of Maven. The new King tells himself the only thing he sees in her is that she’s a way to get to Mare, but something about her genuiness is infectious. 
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Irony twists things. Right now, the irony that my last thoughts might be about how I wish I had been trusted with a suicide pill twist my impending doom into something almost comical. I’d laugh, but I’d rather not startle the rats in my cell. This has been their home for presumably years, but I’ve only been down here a few hours. 
I scratch the back of my wrist, staring at tired stone walls like they’ve done something to me. I wish I knew what time it was. How long have I been down here? How long has it been since I was separated from Mare? An hour? Three?Each passing minute strikes me like a bullet, but I can’t count them. I’ve never had a talent for accurately feeling the passage of time.
My head aches, frustration and dread tangling themselves in the pit of my stomach. Mare told me the Queen can search through someone’s mind, seeing memories even they can’t remember. What will they do when they see I know virtually nothing? What will happen when they see how close Mare and I truly are? i can’t do anything and the unknown hurts more than my bruised rib. 
The sound of the heavy door that divides the luxury of the castle from the wasteland of the cells creaks. I only let my arms flinch, moving from my side to wrap defensively around my stomach. Dull footsteps echo down the pathway that lead to the cell I’m in. I don’t cringe, not even when the sound of walking stops. 
I was not born into a rich family, but I was born into a proud one. Fear was practically a criminal act in my household. I’ve been trained to suppress all signs of weakness. My eyes don’t leave the stone wall, I mentally trace the pattern of a long crack in a specific rock. It reminds me of the slope of the Big Dipper. 
Will I ever see stars again? The answer leaves a sharp pain in my chest. 
“Mare told me about you.” 
The words jar me, my stomach dropping in revulsion. Mare had trusted him, and here he stands--successful because he’s a traitor. I know what it’s like to be the most overlooked sibling and to crave to change that. I know what it’s like to want to succeed more than you want air in your lungs, but I don’t think I’d ever betray someone. I like to think that there’s a line even the monster in me won’t cross. 
I don’t look at him, partially out of an attempt to protest and partially because I’m afraid of what I’ll see. “She might have mentioned you in passing.” 
His scoff is ridiculous. “She didn’t lie about your sense of humor.” 
That almost makes me wince. His words are too close, too personal. It’s like he knows me. I turn my. head, ready to cut through the uneasy beginning to get to the miserable middle if it brings me to the end faster. 
“You’re here to torment me, not make small talk.” Turning had been a mistake. I regret it instantly. His expression is unforgiving--cold, sharp, and made up of only angles. But that’s not why I stare. I did not expect him to be objectively attractive. The fine slope of his nose, the sharpness of his cheekbones, and the ice blue of his eyes. I need to snap out of this mindset. I’m sure his beauty will not be so distracting when he’s burning me. “Though some might consider that the same thing.” 
He scoffs again, the sound dry. The sneer of his lips does not diminish his attractiveness. The fact makes me loathe him. “I wonder if you’ll still be so prone to humor after you’ve been broken--any information of worth extracted from your thoughts.” 
“Let me save everyone the trouble and just tell you everything that I know now.” My back straightens despite the pain in my ribs. I look pathetic, dirty and in a torn dress. He’s regal, dressed in fine, all black clothing. “I know that Mare wanted to kill you today, I know that she needed a distraction and that her distraction needed to be expendable, which is why I’m sitting in front of you.” I squeeze my hands together awkwardly, a bit of genuine irritation rolling in my stomach. “That’s literally all I know, I’m not even part of the Guard.” I scratch the back of my wrist. If I were him, I wouldn’t believe that, but I’m being honest. How pitiful can one person be that they’re worth more disconnected from the group they work for than as an actual member? “You don’t take that kind of risk for someone that’s only skill set is in thought.” 
I didn’t mean to say that out loud, but I don’t regret it. Maybe he’ll think that my story is so pathetic it has to be true. “You have to know more than that.” 
“The Scarlet Guard only reaches out to me on a need-to-know basis, and anything worthwhile to you is something I clearly didn’t need to know.” In a way, I’m glad I can’t give him anything. “So are you going to kill me with a bullet or do you prefer more flamboyant executions?” My death should be plain. I am human completely--I bleed red and I have no powers. “I do think anything more than a simple death is more trouble than I’m worth.” 
His lips press together oddly, something beneath his expression tightening. “You don’t think your dearest friend will return for you?”
The sarcasm in his voice sparks something in me I thought only my sister could. “I think she has a lot of responsibilities and I wouldn’t blame her for having priorities.” 
His eyebrows draw together. “I think you’re painfully unaware of how attached to you she is.” I press my lips into a thin line. “She’ll come for you.”
Something selfish in me hopes that he’s right. No one has ever wanted me enough to come back for me. My mother wanted perfect daughters that knew how to only think in terms of trapping men with stable careers. My sister did it, but I could never manage, and to my mother that made me useless. 
“If you believe it,” I mumble beneath my breath.
I don’t know if he hears me. I can’t bring myself to care if he did. “For your sake, you better not have lied to me.” 
My back relaxes against the raspy wall, fighting down a grimace as the motion irritates my rib injury. “Cross my heart, Your Highness.” 
I watch him carefully, his expression turning into something much more grim. “A King is referred to as His Majesty.” 
“My father was a prominent war general and my mother only wanted daughters she could use to social climb.” I fight down a grin. “I know what I said.” 
His expression darkens into something bone chilling. “I am the King and you’ll refer to me as such or deal with even less pleasant circumstances.” 
I fight against the urge to cower, picturing Mare’s strength in my veins. There’s weakness in everyone, and if I squint I can see the thin cracks in him. “You have everything--the crown, the power, the support of the people, and it’s still not enough. You won and you still feel like you’re competing.” 
“You don’t know anything,” he seethes, practically growling. 
I shouldn’t press him, but the more he reacts, the more weaknesses are revealed. “I know what it’s like to have a sibling that’s the sun, and no matter what you do, no matter how hard you try, you’re always trapped in a shadow.” 
The lighting makes his eyes look almost glazed over. “My mother will be here soon and the truth will be revealed.” 
He can run from me, but not the truth. Cal has nothing, he has everything--the father that never cared for him is dead, and yet he’s still trapped. Our similarities hurt me more than my physical injuries. 
Maven turns, his gaze moving off of me feels like the removal of heavy shackles. “It would do you well to not press me. You’re worth as much whole as you are broken.” 
There’s the strangest hint of something more to his voice. I wonder if he’s speaking to more than just me. “You haven’t won until that voice in your head telling you that you’re not enough is silenced.”
“You’re a powerless girl who isn’t even wanted by a dying cause and couldn’t find a husband to drag her above the poverty line. You know nothing about me, and if you keep pretending I’ll slaughter you in front of your dear friend.” 
He leaves without another word. I fall asleep with my back against the wall and my ribs aching. 
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letsloveimagines · 4 years
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Title: Crush
Pairing: Corpse Husband x fem!youtuber!reader
Collab with: @the-winter-sxldier-posts
Requested by: @unicornblood4ever
Request: Hi I just saw your request post for Corpse, so if you're still taking requests I have one. The reader have been on a losing streak, and Corpse tries to help. But accidentally rats himself out as the second imposter. With fluff if possible, of course only if you have time to write and everything.
Word Count: 3963
Warnings: a little angts and fluff, i guess?
Note: The images doesn’t belong to me, all the credits go to the respective creators. I only made the collage. Also, I will not make anything to make Corpse uncomfortable, if he ends saying he doesn’t like fanfiction about him, I will delete this.
Part II: Here
                                                            ♦⋅☆⋅♦ 
Y/N sat down at her gaming setup, she was getting ready to start a stream she had been invited by her friend Felix (aka Pewdiepie) to play among us with him, and some other friends. She made sure everything was in order before starting it. She had been doing this for so long, but each time it felt like the first, and there was always that little chill in her belly indicating she was nervous.
She got onto her twitter quickly, just to let people know she was live in case they didn't get the notification about it.  As people started coming in, Y/N smiled at the camera. “Hey guys, welcome to the stream.” She read one of the comments from chat asking what she was gonna be playing on stream today.  “Today we are streaming some “Among Us’ with some friends, and I am getting to who they are before you guys spam it in chat. I’m going to be playing with Corpse, Sykkuno, Rae, Felix, Seán, Lily, Toast, Poki and Leslie.” 
She joined the discord call, as the game loaded up. Y/N had her facecam in the middle on the bottom screen to make sure that she wouldn’t leak the code, once Felix sent it to the discord. Once the code was entered they were in the lobby and Y/N, went to the little mini computer in the game to customize her astronaut, and as always she was quick to pick the white colored one with the pink flower on her helmet. “Hey guys.” Y/N said to her friends in discord with a smile. Felix was the first to speak “Y/N finally you’re here!” She and everyone else laughed as he kept talking, excitedly. “We are still waiting for Corpse and Seán to join before we start, they’ll be here in a minute.” Everyone had said their hellos to Y/N as Seán joined the discord call and the game, followed shortly by Corpse. “Hey, Seán, Corpse.” “Hey, Y/N.” “Whaddup baby.” They both said at the same time making everyone laugh once more, as they all had their characters customized. Y/N’s face turned a few shades of red at what Corpse had said, and her chat was quick to pick up on it. “That is everyone, we are starting the game now.” She muted her mic after Felix had started the game and the black screen with the red astronaut, said shhhhh. Then her screen read ‘Crewmate, there are 2 imposters among us.’ 
She blew out a breath talking to the chat. “At least we can warm up as a crewmate this round.” 
But…
It didn't take much longer for her to get killed, which made her swear. She knew she couldn't trust Felix but she did anyway, and he literally stabbed her in the back… What a traitor. 
                                                             ♦⋅☆⋅♦
The time passed faster than it should have, or at least that’s what it seemed to the group of friends who were just having fun. 
Y/N had now been streaming for an hour, and she was on a major losing streak. She either got crewmate, or voted out first as imposter because she was a bad liar. Or when that didn't happen, she was one of the first ones to be killed, and had to spend the entire game floating from one side of the ship to the other as a little white ghost, completing tasks for her team to win. To be honest, she was already a little irritated about that. They were now in the lobby talking to each other while waiting to start the next game. Y/N's nostrils were flared with frustration after another round of failure at being an imposter. She sighed, unmuting her mic."I just wanted to say that in all of these rounds I must have played a full 8 seconds! Like come on, what's wrong with me today!?" 
That phrase was enough to make the others burst out laughing, including her chat. The comments came and went so fast, sliding on the screen on her right side, that she could barely keep up. 
Sykkuno, like the blessed and pure angel he was, replied amid laughter: "Don't worry, you're just on a bad streak. Better luck next time."
"Yeah, I guess." She answered while moving her mini white astronaut in circles, being quickly accompanied by the black astronaut with horns on his helmet. Y/N smiled at that.
"Stop talking guys, I'll start the new round now." Pewds, who was the host, almost screamed at them. 
Y/N cracked her neck and her fingers preparing herself.
"Stay with me this time Y/N, and I'll protect you." A deep voice was heard through her headphones, causing a shiver to go all the way down her spine. 
"Oh!" She exclaimed surprised, looking at her chat that was going insane with everyone saying how cute that was. "Thank you, Corpse, let's do that."
"No problem." She could hear the smile in his voice. 
The game was started and the black screen with the red astronaut, said shhhhh. Then her screen read IMPOSTER.
Y/N quickly muted her mic, as soon as she stopped listening to her friends speak. "Okay, I wasn't expecting that." She commented to her chat, very surprised, because next to her doll was Corpse's own little character. "Well, maybe my luck is changing. Everyone heard that Corpse and I were going to be together, so at least now we have an alibi if anyone suspects us." Corpse danced around Y/N, suggesting she follow him, and immediately she did. They both went through the ship as he was looking for innocent astronauts for them to murder. They ended up in medbay first, where Y/N faked her samples task, with Corpse watching over her and making sure that no one would find their behavior suspicious. 
And, oh, how her luck seemed to have increased when Felix walked in. Y/N immediately pulled up the sabotage map and locked the medbay doors, and Corpse was quick to kill him. That made the girl laugh hard, yelling out loud. "That was just karma having its way!" 
Then both vented out as the doors were still locked. 
Y/N smiled talking to the chat. “Pewds is dead, next if the opportunity arises we need to get Seán. They are the two that always sus me out even when I’m a crewmate.” She went back to the game as they vented into electrical, since nobody was there presently. They both faked tasks in electrical, Y/N going first with Corpse watching her back. To her surprise, Seán walked in all alone and right as she was going to get her first kill, when Felix’s body was reported. She rolled her eyes. “Damn, so close to getting them both.” She said to her fans as she unmuted the mic, and saw that Rae was the one that found Pewds. 
“Where is the body?” Y/N questioned trying to keep her voice level and calm, to not give herself away. “Pewds is dead in medbay.” Was the answer she got from the other girl. “Y/N and I were in Electrical with Seán.” Corpse said, trying to immediately shift suspicion off of the two of them. “They were already there when I entered the room, however. I don't know where they came from before, though." 
"We came in through storage, after Y/N and I both did the trash chute, Y/N stopped at the gas can and then we came to the electrical to do our tasks." 
Y/N quickly muted herself. "God, Corpse is gonna carry us this round, I can already feel it…I just want one kill and that is Seán, Corpse can kill everyone else... I just want to kill Seán!" She unmuted again as the friends decided that they didn't have enough information to vote anyone, so they skipped and no one was ejected. 
Corpse danced around again for Y/N to follow him and she did. This time they went through weapons. Y/N faked the task against the wall while Corpse faked one as well. Y/N brought up the sabotage map while they waited on the kill cool down to end. 
Y/N  sabotaged the lights, and the two imposters ran over there to turn them on as a way not to give anything that made them suspicious.
"Kill someone, don't wait for Corpse." Y/N read the comments, confused. "I don't know guys, are you sure? Today I haven't won any games as an imposter, so I don't want to give any reasons to make my team lose.” Looking back at the screen of the computer, she smiled seeing that the two little astronauts were touching each other, eye to eye, in what would probably be a strange little kiss. "Awww guys, look! Corpse just kissed me, this is too cute to handle."
But there was something that the fans did not fail to notice, and were quick to tell her that.
                                           User: She's blushing!
                                     User: This is so cute, I'm dying.
                             User: UGH, I ship them together so much!
"Oh, shut up y’all." She said with her face on fire, clearing her throat trying to make her voice normal again. However, the pink tone that painted her cheeks did not want to disappear, getting worse and worse as she thought about it. “Okay, as much as I don't like it, I'm going to do what you said. I’m sorry, Corpse." And then she quickly ran away, going to another path separated from Corpse, looking for someone alone that she could kill.
Hopefully it would be Seán.Y/n would be the first to agree that she was a little obsessed with getting her revenge. But could you blame her? Seán and Felix were almost always the reason she got voted out or killed first.
She went around the map, and on the navigation she found Lily alone. "Oh oh, poor Lily, but I need to do this." She was quick to press the button, kill and enter the vent, leaving Lily's body cut in half behind.
"Quickly, I need to find someone to be my alibi! Where's Corpse?" She came out of a different vent, running and seeing Rae nearby, quickly joining her. It didn't take long before someone reported the body. "Oh no, I'm sweating already."
“Lily’s body was in navigation.” Leslie said.
“And Toast is dead too, so it was a double kill this round.”
"Where have you been, Leslie?" Corpse asked with such a deep and calm voice that if Y/N were not the other imposter, she would think he was innocent. “I was with Sykkuno in security, looking at the cameras.”
“Yes, I was with him.” The mentioned boy said.
“Well, I was with Poki in medbay but I needed to do the asteroids in weapons. So, when I finished in weapons  I went down, and found the body." Leslie replied.
"That seems a little sus to me, to be honest."
"Yeah, seems pretty sus to me too." Y/N repeated after Corpse, trying to help.
"Okay, wait a minute." Rae began, suspiciously. "I was with Y/N for a while because we met in storage, but she came from the right side of the map, I saw it."
"Explain yourself, Y/N."
'Oh no. Busted.' Thought the girl nervously looking at the camera. She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself, and replied as calmly as she could: "Well, yes it's true, but I was in comms uploading. When I finished I left and that's when I found Rae in storage."
"It's her!" Seán accused.
"Definitely."
"What!?" Y/N asked shocked. "No, I'm not the imposter guys, I swear!"
"Y/N, stop, it makes perfect sense. I'm voting." She rolled her eyes, that is exactly why she wanted to kill Seán. 
It was then that Corpse interrupted: "It couldn't have been her, she was with me."
'What?' Y/N asked herself, 'No, I wasn’t. What is he doing?'
"But... You said you were with Sykkuno."
"I... Yeah, but before that I was with her in Comms, but I left to go to the Security."
"And what path did you take?" Rae questioned.
"I went through storage, then electrical and I went up."
"That’s impossible because I went down the left side, and went through electrical and I didn't see you."
"They’re both the imposters, oh my god." Was Seáns revelation. 
"No, we are not. What he said is true!" Y/N tried to defend. 
"I'm going to vote Corpse this time just for his audacity!" Rae exclaimed excitedly. "Then we vote for Y/N!"
"What!?" Corpse said shocked. "No...!"
But it was too late, and quickly his little bean body flew off the ship. ‘Corpse was ejected.’
The girl could do nothing more than gawk at the computer screen, still shocked by what had happened. "No!" She said when she muted the microphone. "The game is already lost. What can I do?" She questioned, guilty.
                                           User: Noooo! Poor Corpse.
                                          User: He was defending her :(
                              User: It's her fault that they found out he was the other imposter.
Guilt weighed on Y/N's heart and she felt saddened. Why did she have to ruin everything? "I know, I'll apologize to him when I can." She whispered to the chat, quietly, running around with her character confusedly. "What do I do now? Do I kill someone or do I play innocent?"
But at that time a meeting was called by Seán who was camped by the emergency button, and everyone got together to speak.
"Yes?"
"Well, we already know who the other imposter is. Are we going to vote her out or not?" He said laughing.
"Guys, please don't, it’s not me."
"Sorry Y/N, but you're the only one sus right now."
"What about Leslie?” Y/N tried. “She left Poki in medbay, she could have gone to navigation, killed Lily, self-reported and said she was in weapons!"
"No, don't believe her!" Leslie shouted. “She’s lying.”
"I know it's Y/N, I'm going to vote for her!"
And one by one everyone voted, and the game was over.
"Good job guys, we did it." The others celebrated while the girl almost pouted.
"What happened, Corpse? I’ve never seen you like that, well, playing so badly I mean." Sykkuno questioned his friend timidly.
There was silence from Corpse for a moment, before he simply said. "I don’t know.”
Swallowing hard, Y/N spoke softly. "Corpse?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm sorry."
"Ehh, don't be. That's alright."
But that was not enough to erase her guilt. "You know Seán this is exactly why I was gonna kill you in the electrical, before Rae found Felix's body. You always sus me out even when I’m  innocent." 
“But you were the imposter this time!”
After a new game where she quickly died (Seán was the one who broke her neck and left her body in admin), the girl was quick to open Discord and send a message to the deep-voiced boy, who as much - as she didn't want to admit it, even more to herself - was her crush.
                                                           Y/N:     I’m so sorry I got you voted out, honestly, I feel so bad about it. I’m such a bad imposter.
                                                       CORPSE:             Y/N, It’s fine, really. There’s no need for you to feel bad about it ♥.
This put a smile on the girl's face again, and her chat was quick to question what was going on. She shrugged her shoulders and gave no further answer, Y/N returned to concentrating on the game, with the corner of her lips lifted in a half smile that she couldn’t control.
                                                           ♦⋅☆⋅♦
Time quickly passed full of fun for the ten friends, and the thousands of people who watched them. Y/N didn't win any of the rounds, but she didn't care about it anymore. After another hour  of playing she decided to say goodbye and finish the stream, feeling the tiredness dominating her. She ate something and took a long and relaxing bath, which eased her aching muscles, and was already in her fluffy blue pajama pants, and was getting ready to go to bed when her phone rang.
Picking it up from the nightstand, she looked at the screen and gasped in surprise seeing who was facetiming her. A shiver ran down her spine. Shaking from head to toe, with her heart pounding, she quickly ran her hand through her hair making sure she was at least minimally presentable, before she answered it, saying nervously, "Hey, Corpse, is everything okay?"
The screen came to life, with her tiny image in the corner and the completely black screen dominating it. Of course he wouldn't turn on the camera, nor did she want him to do it if he didn't feel comfortable. It was already surprising that he actually called, since he has never done that before, and that was what made her even more nervous.
"I just wanted to check on you."  His voice came through the phone. 
That made her face heat up a little. She was thankful that the only light she had on was the lamp on her nightstand and he couldn’t see how red her face got. 
"Cute pajamas by the way." He said while laughing a little bit, provoking her.  
"Well, I would say the same thing, but I can't see anything."  Y/N provoked back.
There was a comfortable silence after that, a silence that the two of them seemed afraid to try to break. The girl laid down on her bed, curled up under her warm sheets, and looked at the black screen kindly, with her head resting on the pillow.
"So-"
"I-" They both said at the same time, and immediately stopped talking when they realized that. “Go ahead-” “You first-”  they once again said at the exact same time. 
Y/N tried to speak. She really tried. She was so prepared to tell him the truth, to tell him how much she was into him, that she was in fact in love with him… She was prepared to say that meeting him, and having him in her life for the past few months was one of the best things that ever happened to her. Y/N was determined to speak, but when she tried, nothing came out.  She stood there, opening and closing her mouth, sighing with a frown on her face. 
"What's up?" Corpse asked seeing that, with concern in his voice.
"Nothing."
"Y/N, you know you can tell me anything."
"I know that." And she really did, Corpse was a good friend, an excellent friend who was always there for her... And that was exactly what she was afraid to ruin with her confession. "You are able to make me so nervous sometimes, even when I think I'm feeling brave."
"Oh, yeah?" He asked, and she could practically see his smile, even though she has never actually seen it. She was in love with a faceless man and she had no idea how to tell him that. 
"Oh, shut up."
He laughed deeply for a long time, and that was enough to make her smile. Finally he stopped and said quietly, almost timidly. "I think what you wanted to say is exactly what I want to tell you."
Impossible, Y/N thought with a sad smile on her lips. I want to tell you how much I love you but… how could I? And who could ever love me?
"No, believe me, it isn't." “And how do you know it isn’t?” Y/N bit her lip a little unsure of how to answer him without revealing her feelings for him. “I-” But she cuts herself off, not having the courage to actually say the words. She pressed her face into the pillow to muffle the groan that came out of her mouth, at how much a coward she was being, but she mumbled out her response that was still muffled. “I just know.”
“What was that?” All he had heard were incoherent sounds.. She sighed, removing her face from the pillow not wanting to repeat what she had said, to save herself the rejection, since he couldn’t possibly feel the same way that she did about him.
“Are you really not going to tell me?” His voice broke through her thoughts. She sighed, trying to get away from the internal battle going on in her mind. “Y/N?” He spoke once again, breaking her out of her thoughts. 
“If I say it... everything is gonna be ruined and weird for us, and I don’t want that. Your friendship is so important to me, you're my best friend.” She ran a hand down her face, furious with herself. “How do you know that, if you don’t say it?” 
“Because I just do, okay?” Why couldn't he just let it go? "I-" She tried to say it out loud, once more. C'mon Y/N, just say it. "I gotta go!" She said quickly tried to end the call, but he wouldn't let her.
"No!" He screamed out sharply, taking her by surprise and then he did something she never thought he would do.
The screen, which was previously completely dark, lit up and his face finally appeared for the girl who loved him to see. Y/N sighed in shock, admiring all his features, from his ivory-white skin to his dark curly hair.
"I have a crush on you too." He confessed quietly, with a soft pink tinge appearing on his cheeks.
Did he just...? Oh my god!  
There was silence again, but this time it was a silence that had become tense and terrifying for both of them. Corpse was nervous waiting for her to say something, and she could tell. His mouth was pressed in a thin line, he didn't seem able to face her as his gaze traveled anywhere but to her, and he fidgeted immensely, touching everything within reach from the rings - that she saw he had on his fingers - to the chain necklace he had around his neck.
"Oh." She sighed softly, not knowing what to say.
He looked at her then, apprehensive and almost ashamed. "Ugly, I know."
"No!" Y/N was quick to interrupt. "You are incredibly handsome just… just as I always imagined." The girl managed to see a small smile appear on his lips as he blushed deeply.
"I..." 
"I’m in love with you too." She confessed, finally without fear. It felt like weight lifted off her to finally get it out in the open between the two of them.
Corpse’s eyes went wide, completely shocked but so, so happy. A huge smile full of shiny teeth on his face, as he focused all of his attention on Y/N. "You are?"
"Yes." She said blushing and smiling intensely as she snuggled up in the blankets, her face almost hidden when she looked at him dreamily.
"I-" He cleared his throat. "Good."
"Good."
"Great."
"Great!"
They burst out laughing, their voices mixing in hamornia. The two looked each other in the eye, separated by a mobile phone screen, separated by kilometers and kilometers... but even with everything that separated them, the world was not able to stop them from falling in love with each other.
"What do we do now?" He questioned.
"Well..." Y/N started. "We'll have to see, won't we? Why don't you start by giving me your address?"
Corpse smiled provocatively, his beautiful eyes shining maliciously. "Of course... But be careful now baby, the devil’s got his eyes on you."
Y/N laughed completely in love.
"Oh, shut up."
                                                            ♦⋅☆⋅♦ Tag List: @breathygasps
3K notes · View notes
crackheadgeminibby · 3 years
Note
Could you write something 'bout Chris congratulating yn in public and privately 'cause it's mother's day and she's dodger's mom? 🥺
mother's day
pairing: chris evans x female!black!reader
warnings: age gap, language, fluff
word count: 1.5k
a/n: i love this idea so much, thanks for giving me the opportunity to write it🤍
i do not consent to my work being copied in any way, shape or form or reposted on any other platform
picture credit: @chrisevans on instagram
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You groan softly, before turning around and stopping your alarm.
It’s Sunday, which normally meant no alarm and sleeping in, but you had plans. Today is Mother’s Day. You normally spent it with your mother going out for brunch, shopping, going to the movies, etc. but in the last year, you had moved in with Chris and he lived really far away from your parents’ house. You had told your mom that you were going to call her, first thing this morning, to make up for not being able to be with her.
Since you were in Boston with Chris, you were going to be spending Mother’s Day at his mom’s house. This meant a big dinner, but it also meant you had to make some food to take it there.
Every single time you went to Lisa’s house, you always brought something whether it was a meal, dessert, wine or a gift. And every single time you brought something, she said you didn’t have to do that. You couldn’t help it though; it was just how you were raised. Your parents always told you to never show up empty-handed when someone invited you to their home and that’s exactly what you did.
Today, you were making apple pie for dessert which meant fresh apples and going to the grocery store right at the opening.
Rubbing your eyes, you push the covers off your body and walk to the ensuite bathroom. While brushing your teeth, you take your phone and open Instagram. The first post you see is one that Scott posted a couple of minutes ago. The first picture is a collage of a bunch of pictures of him and his mom. You smile softly at their smiles in the pictures. Sliding, you see other collages with pictures of Scott’s friends and their kids. You double-click on the post, leaving a like, and slide down to the second post. Of course, it’s Chris’ post to his mom. The first picture is an old picture of them holding each other and smiling. You slide and see that the second picture is from when he took her to the Winter Soldier premiere. You double-click again, liking the post. You’re about to put your phone down to take a shower but see a bunch of notifications appearing on your screen.
Confused, you refresh your Instagram feed and see a new post by Chris appearing at the top. You frown, seeing yourself from the back in the first picture. You slide down to the caption and gasp softly as you read it: “Also, happy Mother’s Day to this beautiful woman! We may not have any babies but you sure as hell are Dodger’s mom. Kinda hate that he likes you more than me now but it’s okay because I love you💙”
You smile as you go through the pictures he posted. The first one is a picture you didn’t even know he had taken from when Dodger, Chris and you had gone on a picnic a couple of days ago. The second is a pretty dark and blurry picture that he obviously hid to take. You recognize the angle being from the entrance of the living room. You were laying on the couch, engulfed in a fluffy blanket, with Dodger laying in front of you, his head resting on your stomach. You smile softly, remembering that day.
It was a couple of months ago and you were on your period. You normally didn’t have really big cramps but the stress you were feeling had intensified them and you were almost unable to move. When Chris had come back from work, seeing you laying on the couch in pain, he had gone right back out to get you a bunch of food to satisfy your cravings and half a dozen hot compresses because he wasn’t sure which one you would like.
Chuckling softly, you slide to the last picture, slightly cringing at your appearance. It was a screenshot from a FaceTime call, right after you had moved in with Chris. He had to leave for a few weeks to film and you were alone with Dodger, who always wanted to see Chris before you hung up. In the picture, you had clearly just woken up and were laughing, probably at something Chris said, with half of Dodger’s face mid-bark in the frame.
You like the post and scroll through a couple of comments, some nice, others not so much, before putting your phone down.
While in the shower, your mind goes back to a conversation you had with Chris recently. It was after your first big fight.
Everyone knew Chris wanted kids and you obviously did too. But he had brought it up accusingly when you were exhausted and anxious and you had blurted out that you didn’t want kids. It wasn’t really the truth because you did want kids. And you wanted them with Chris, but you weren’t ready. After you had said that, you had a screaming match with Chris that ended up with you sleeping in the guest room, not that much sleeping was done. Halfway through the night, Chris had knocked on the door, asking if you were awake, and you talked to each other, explaining both of your viewpoints: you felt like you weren’t ready to be a good mom to a child because you were still dealing with trauma from when you were younger, and Chris felt like his clock was running out. After talking to each other, you had settled on kids in the near future, but not right now.
Getting dressed after your shower, you think about the fact that you hadn’t heard a peep from Chris since you had woken up. Considering it was Sunday and Mother’s Day, you knew he couldn’t have scheduled a meeting today. He sometimes ran or worked out on Sundays, but you had been up for almost 2 hours now.
Walking to the kitchen, you open your Messages app, ready to send him a text asking where he is when you hear, “Dodge, stop, let it go.”
Frowning, you start deleting the message when you hear, “Happy Mother’s Day!”
You shriek, startled, before letting out, “Holy shit!”
You look up at the dining room that is completely decorated. There are colorful banners all around the walls and the table is filled with food from waffles and pancakes to fruits and drinks. Finally, Chris and Dodger are standing in the corner of the room in front of balloons that spell out “MMO❤️”. You frown, tilting your head. Chris’s smile falters as he turns around, groaning, “Dodger, I told you to stop moving the balloons.”
He turns around completely, arranging the balloons to say “MOM❤️” and turns back around, saying, “Ta-da!”
You laugh loudly before walking to Chris, hugging him.
“When did you have time to do all this?”
Chris smiles, holding your waist, before yawning and saying, “I got up at like 6 to make all the food and then I got the balloons when the mall opened at 8.”
You wrap your arms around Chris before kissing his cheek.
“Well, thank you, I love it. And I love you.”
You bite your bottom lip, flicking your eyes down to his lips, before leaning towards him. Chris smirks, letting his hand slide to your butt cheek, softly squeezing it before you hear a small whine. You stop moving, slowly looking down. Dodger looks up at you with his big brown eyes, rubbing his snout on your leg.
You smile softly, letting go of Chris before bending down and petting his head.
“You want some love too, huh, Dodge?”
You rub the back of Dodger’s ears, hearing a click sound. You turn around, seeing Chris with his phone in his hand. You smile, saying, “Did you just take a picture?”
Chris smiles softly, “No?”
You chuckle, sitting down and gesturing at Chris to join you. Chris takes one of your hands in his and pets Dodger with the other. You alternate looking at Chris and Dodger before sighing and cupping Chris’ face in your hands. You kiss him softly, leaning back and saying, “I love you, baby.”
Chris smiles softly, replying, “I love you too.”
You look down, sighing softly. Chris lifts your head up, giving you a knowing look, “What’s wrong, baby?”
You chuckle at how perfectly he knows you.
“I know I said I wasn’t ready, but I think maybe I am.”
Chris’ smile widens slowly before he says, “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”
You nod your head excitedly and Chris lunges at you, tackling you to the ground, planting kisses all over your face. You laugh softly, hearing Dodger bark, before he excitedly starts jumping around Chris and you.
Chris leans back slightly before whispering, “You’re gonna be the best mom, I just know it.”
You smile softly, kissing his cheek and wrapping your arms around him.
709 notes · View notes
fangirl-writes · 3 years
Text
Ghost of You
Calum Hood x Reader
Warning(s): death, mourning, Calum crying on stage. Angst.
Notes: I saw a video on tiktok of Cal singing his heart out to this song so here we are. Not revised, written in one session.
Summary: Based on the song Ghost Of You. 
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The boys were hesitant to keep the tour dates after what happened. Everyone needs time and they thought that the space between the accident and the first show wasn’t long enough.
But Calum disagreed. He assured his bandmates that he would have no trouble by the time the show came around.
They were skeptical, argued with him to the contrary, but Calum just looked at them with tears in his brown eyes and said, “Please. Please let me do this. She would have wanted me to do what I love.”
They didn’t argue after that.
Calum woke up the morning before they hit the road facing the side of the bed that would never be filled again.
He can’t sleep there. He hasn’t even made an effort to make the bed, holding on to the last outlines of where you had once been.
The sheets were ruffled and the comforter was pushed near the end of the bed, your pillow was propped up against the headboard where you had been sitting, drinking out of your coffee cup.
The coffee cup that still sat on the bedside table just next to your side of the bed.
A small tear fell from Calum’s eye as he noticed the ever fading lipstick stain on the rim. A subtle, but pretty pink that you always wore. The one that would sometimes stain his cheek before he went out on stage.
He wiped the tear and tried to smile.
Oh, what you’d say if you could speak to him now. “Wipe those tears away, Cal. You’ll be just fine.”
I’ll be just fine. Calum thought. Eventually, I’ll be just fine.
He got up from the bed, not bothering to prepare himself for the day yet.
His suitcases sat fully packed by the door; ready to be loaded onto the tour bus for the next few months.
He always had more suitcases than you did, for obvious reasons. But he swore you could fit everything you owned in that one little suitcase. A suitcase that wouldn’t be used again, and probably wouldn’t leave the closet.
Calum sighed, pushing away the thoughts and walking out of the bedroom. Trying to drown the thoughts of you out, like he always did, trying to think of anything else.
But he found walking down that hallway to make it especially hard.
In that hallway, in those photos, he swears he can see the ghost of you.
The first one hanging there is a picture of you and him that he used to find almost hilarious to behold. It was an older one, back when they were just getting big and he was still a teenager, it was one of you and him, taken when you were just a fan. Someone Calum didn’t think he’d probably ever see again.
But life works in mysterious ways.
The one across from that was the most recent, it was a selfie you took at Michael and Crystal’s wedding. Your tongue was hanging out of your mouth and you’d made you eyes cross, Calum was making a duck face, doing the same to his eyes.
It never failed to make him laugh.
Next was your first paparazzi appearance. You joked it was your claim to fame, being followed and snapped in a professional photo with Cal. It wasn’t anything special, really. Just a picture of the two of you walking down a street in L.A, holding hands and decked out in what was probably your laziest outfits ever. Calum had on a dark pair of sunglasses and you were smiling up at him, probably about to crack a joke to get that stoic look off his face.
The rest were either family photos, photos of him and the boys, you and your friends, or just silly pictures of the two of you together.
He tried to walk as fast through that hall as he could, trying to keep the tears from reaching his eyes.
But he couldn’t take them down. It might kill him.
He made it to the kitchen with little resistance and poured himself his own cup of coffee, trying to focus on the upcoming tour and not think about you.
He had deleted social media off his phone. He couldn’t take the constant notifications and reminders and apologies from fans. They missed you too, but Calum missed you an ungodly amount more.
He frowned when he saw the empty vodka bottle sitting on his kitchen counter. God his place was a mess. He needed to at least clean up before he left, maybe that’d get his mind off things.
Put on some music. Yeah, that’d be okay.
He finished his cup of coffee, washing the mug before hurrying off to get the other tasks finished before he had to leave.
He took out the trash, cleaned out the fridge, put away his dishes, swept the floors, vacuumed the floors, cleaned the windows, dusted the shelves.
All that was left was laundry.
He made it to the laundry room easily. But once he was in there, nothing was harder.
He filled a load with his dirty clothes, turning on the machine before tentatively reaching for the basket that held yours.
He blinked back tears when he noticed the old Zeppelin shirt sitting in there. The one that your wore when you ran away, and no one could feel your hurt.
“He’s a rockstar,” your family had said. “it won’t last.”
“I’m in love with him,” you had replied.
Too young, too dumb, to know things like love. Calum thought with a shake of his head. What did they know? But I know better, now.
Calum went through the rest of your clothes, a memory surfacing for almost each one. A old 5sos merch shirt that you’d worn on your first date, not even thinking about it. A pair of music note socks that he had a matching pair of. A pair of skinny jeans you had a love-hate relationship with. A white bra that you had thrown on stage at one of their concerts as a joke, only for it to end up catching on the neck of Calum’s bass.
He smiled at the memory. His entire face had gone bright red and he had looked down at you with an almost scandalized look. The other boys had to stop the song because they were laughing too hard.
He let your clothes lay back in the hamper after he was done. He didn’t see a reason to wash them yet.
But he tucked that old Zeppelin shirt into his travel bag.
He loaded his bags into the back of Michael’s car, ready to head to the bus. Crystal waved at him from the passenger seat, he waved back.
“You got your keys?”
Calum blinked, not even realizing he was going to need those now. “I didn’t even lock the door,”
Michael laughed, pushing his friend lightly towards his house again. “Go get them.”
Calum chuckled back, hurrying to do so.
It hadn’t even dawned on him that you wouldn’t be there to watch the house, that he needed to lock the door. He had already sent Duke to stay at Luke and Sierra’s but locking his door? He’d never even thought of it.
He grabbed his keys before pausing.
Yours were hanging there, too. A keychain with your initials on it dangling next to the keys.
He grabbed those instead.
“You ready for this, mate?” Ashton asked him as he slid into the back seat.
“Yeah,” Calum said, softly, caressing the keychain with his thumb. “Yeah, I am.”
And as Michael took off, looking back at his house, Calum could’ve sworn he saw the ghost of you.
***
The night was going great so far, the crowd was pumped up, screaming and hollering.
Cal had managed to get lost in the music, forgetting about his problems for hours.
Until the song he had been dreading all night.
He almost asked if they could take it off the setlist after he saw it.
But then they’d have given the sad, almost pitying look that they did when they talked about canceling the tour. And he didn’t think he could stand those looks again.
He took a deep breath as the piano notes began. He could do this.
“Let’s see those lights up in your hands,” Luke said, holding his arm up.
Calum reached his microphone and his breath caught in his throat.
Someone was holding a picture of you up. Almost as if they knew.
His eyes darted to a different part of the crowd only to find an even larger poster being held up and illuminated by the stage lights. It read your name, your birthday, and the day you-
Calum looked away again, trying to blink back tears.
“Wow look at all those-” Luke voice cracked and he cleared his throat. “Wow, you guys, this is...”
There were maybe hundreds of posters or photos being held up now along with the phone lights.
“You know, this is my first concert without her in a long time,” Calum found himself saying into the mic. “And this way she’s still here. Thank you guys. Thank you so much.”
The fans cried out in response and Calum cleared his throat, saying to his bandmates away from the mic. “Okay, let’s do this.”
Singing the song, Cal hadn’t realized how much it fit his situation until just then. He hoped it wasn’t some screwed up sort of fate that they would write this song and then he would lose you.
“So I drown it out like I always do,” Luke sang. “Dancing through our house...”
“With the ghost of you,” Calum chimed in, mind filled with thoughts of you. He didn’t drown them out this time, he just let them come.
“And I chase it down, with a shot of truth. Dancing through our house, with the ghost of you,”
“Too young... too dumb... to know things like love,” He could feel the tears falling down his cheeks. “Too young... too dumb...”
“You go!” Luke shouted, allowing the crowd to sing the chorus.
“So I drown it out like I always do,” They sang and Calum hung his head back, trying to hide his tears as he listened. “Dancing through our house. with the ghost of you.”
You would have loved this. You would have said that it gave you chills, hearing the crowd sing such a haunting song back to them.
“And I chase it down with a shot of truth. That my feet don't dance...”
“Like they did with you.” Luke sang the last line with the crowd before the stage went black and Calum rushed off to the side of the stage.
The boys followed quickly, wrapping him in a hug after they reached him, and for the first time since you’d been gone, Calum let himself just cry. He didn’t push it down or wipe his tears, he just cried. He let his best friends hold him and he cried.
But just there, like everywhere, wrapped in the arms of his friends, Calum could have sworn he felt the ghost of you.
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diavolosthots · 3 years
Note
Hey dear! I hope that you have a good time! I want to make a request, but please delete it if you don't feel like doing it.
I saved that request in the notes and been waiting for you to open them 😊
For request
First fight with brother (any of your choice) and one of them (I mean MC or that brother) thinks that it's end of relationship (because never had anything serious), but they reconciled in the end. I want some heavy angst with happy ending. MC can be GN if that is OK.
If you don't mind you can do for Mammon, but feel free to choose another one if you don't feel like write for him. Or if that would be better to write as headcanons for all the brothers. That's up to you!
I haven't been doing requests for ages. Please don't hate me if there is something wrong! I've read the rules, and I hope I haven't missed anything.
Anyway, sorry for long ask. And thank you for your writings!
(I forgot to look if you did anything similar, and remembered it at the end of writing that ask. Sorry if you already did something like that!)
Hey babes ❤ I did end up doing HCs for all of them because I thought it would be cooler (or more like I know someone is gonna request separate fics for all of them if I dont and I'm saving myself that trouble lol) I still hope you like it ! ❤ also this got SUPER LONG so its under a cut
Warning: angst -> happy ending-ish
THE BROTHERS in a fight with MC and thinking that they’re over (yikes)
Lucifer:
Everyone always says Lucifer is quick to lose his cool but he’s honestly been nothing but patient with you. He may have hinted at several things he doesn’t condone and he definitely has that ‘look’, you know the disappointed dad look, but he has held back a lot so as to not ruin the beautiful relationship you have with him. Everyone snaps, though, and when he finally did, it was ugly. He did NOT call you names, but oh he didn’t. He went straight for your feelings and pointed out every mistake you ever made for as long as he’s known you. Ouch. In his defense, you weren’t nice either. The argument ended nasty and ‘I hate you’s!’ were definitely thrown around, but none of them were meant, right? Goodness, he doesn’t know. After you left, he threw himself on his bed, literally, and just stared at the ceiling. His anger slowly fled away and he began to feel… guilty. Not necessarily because of the argument itself, but because he delivered some low blows and he knows that. Are you over? Done with him? You haven’t texted or called or talked… you’ve been actively avoiding him and he doesn’t like that, but his pride is such an issue, goodness. He can’t straight up apologize, that dickhead, but he’s sending you flowers and standing in front of your door with a sad face that says it all. 
“Forgive me? I made reservations at your favorite’s? We can talk over a nice dinner?” 
Mammon:
Mammon is known to get mildly agitated over the silliest things, let’s be real. He’s also quick to revert to the “are you dumb?!” argument, which is never effective. But he loves you and he would do anything for you so even if you do do something that he deems ‘dumb’, he usually bites his tongue. Doesn’t mean that doesn’t get on his nerves, though, and he definitely has a short temper, although people tend to overlook that. You just managed to push his buttons today and he used the “are ya stupid?!” argument, to which you obviously defended yourself, and rightfully so. This ended in a massive screaming match and him saying “Then leave! Ain’t nobody keepin’ ya with me!” He regretted it the minute those words left his mouth and you could see his eyes grow wide in shock at his own words, but that didn’t mean you stayed. “MC!” he tried running after you immediately but you were faster and honestly, who can blame you? He fucked up, and he knows it, and he feels terrible about it. Honestly, he’s crying just at the mere thought of you taking his words seriously and he can’t… he can’t bear to lose you, you know? What’s he gonna do? You’re the light of his life, as pathetic as that may sound to some…. So he won’t let you run away. Homie will hunt you down and beg for forgiveness. 
“Please, MC! Forgive me! I’m dumb, not you!!! Don’t leave me…” Don’t leave him. He will continue crying. 
Leviathan:
His constant need to put himself down is frankly, quite annoying. To you anyway. But you put up with it and just reassure him that, at least to you, he’s the most amazing demon that ever existed. It’s just facts. But a person only has so much patience, right? You can’t always spend your days trying to lift him up when all he does is dig himself a bigger hole. Who has the emotional time for that? You sure don’t. “Oh my God, Levi! Shut up! I can’t take it anymore!” Followed by “See! You’re just like everyone else! Leaving me!” and then you slamming the door to his room shut. It’s frustrating and understandably so. It makes you feel awful that you can’t even make your own boyfriend feel good about himself and get at least a little bit of self confidence and it’s so, so, so very draining to have to constantly listen to that. At this point, it’s affecting your own mental health and you just… you just can’t…. But Levi can’t lose you because he knows you’re right. He has to work on himself if he wants to keep someone as amazing as you with him and that’s why he’s crawling back to you now. 
“Look I… I know you’re right… I’m sorry. I promise I’ll … I’ll try. For you.”
Satan:
For being the Avatar of Wrath, you always admired Satan for his ability to keep cool. He prefers the relaxed and easy going life much more than the type of life people expect him to live, and you respect that. That doesn’t mean his constant need to one up Lucifer, through whatever means necessary, didn’t bother the hell out of you, though. You tried talking to him about it once or twice in a calm manner, but you always got the same answer “Pfft.. it’s Lucifer. Who cares?” And it never sat right with you. Just today he decided to pull a prank on the eldest and you had enough, standing in front of Lucifer and letting the bucket of cursed green slime land on you instead, to everyone’s shock. “What are you doing?!” Now that you’re thoroughly green from head to toe, you were also beyond pissed. “What am I doing?! What are YOU doing?!” But Satan matched your anger tenfold, accusing you of favoring Lucifer over him and oh! “You probably got an affair with him, too!” Which was a stupid thing on his part, but it looked like it the way you defended him. Anger doesn’t even begin to describe the emotion you felt running through you and had it not been for Lucifer, you probably would’ve physically fought Satan for such a dumb accusation. Lucifer took you to get cleaned up and lifted the course, giving you your natural skin and hair color back within a few days and plenty of scrubbing, and Satan felt like shit. You’ve always been there for him and, rationally speaking, he didn’t have a reason to doubt your loyalty to him, but he just can’t help but feel insecure beside Lucifer…. He decides to come apologize anyway, a deep blush on his face and guilt in his eyes 
“I’m… sorry for accusing you. It wasn’t my right to speak out of anger and jealousy…” 
Asmodeus:
How can anyone fight with the Avatar of Lust? Seriously, the guy is super easy going and he loves pretty much everyone. Not as much as himself, but almost. You on the other hand… you didn’t. Well you didn’t NOT love him or yourself, but you were just… you. You didn’t spend 4+ hours in the bathroom trying to get ready when you knew you were only going to the kitchen down the stairs. Like?? Although you never brought it up to Asmodeus, he constantly bothered you about skincare and what foods to eat and what not to eat, etc… It’s quite annoying, honestly, and at some point you just gave him a passive aggressive “Okay, whatever. Can we move on now?” To which he didn’t take lightly. He was still nice and sweet, trying to convince you that at least one of these things will make your skin glow brighter than a unicorn’s ass but you just had enough. “Can you stop?! You’re indirectly saying I’m ugly without that shit ton of product in my face and a diet that would make me starve before it helped me! If you want a skinny VS angel that barely holds onto their skeleton, get one!” It was more hurt and frustration speaking than anything, but your outburst still shocked him and he was taken aback for a moment. And then you ignored him for a week straight and as someone who thrives off of attention, especially the kind he gets from you, he can’t handle that! So he showed up in your room in sweats and a tshirt and messy hair and no product on his skin. 
“You’re right… we’re all naturally beautiful…. Wow that… that really hurts to say MC but can you forgive me?” 
Beelzebub:
Oh the sweet, sweet angel. He’s far from innocent and you know that. We all know that. But for this story, I will give him the benefit of the doubt. His reliance on Belphegor is just really… annoying. Belphegor this, Belphegor that. “Belphie used to…” or “Belphie said….” or “one day when Belphie and I….” Like why does everything have to include his twin? It’s so annoying and so rude when your significant other is right here !!! and planning their own future with you, Beel, thanks. It makes you feel less than and like Belphegor will always come before you. It makes you feel like shit, quite frankly, and who is to blame you? “Hey MC did I tell you what Belphie---!” “No! Shut up! I don’t care! It’s always about Belphie! The day you come to me and don’t let that name drip from your tongue is the day Jesus comes back to save me and we both know that will be never! I’m tired of always being stuck with Belphegor! We are not equals!” Granted, you shouldn’t have yelled and Beel was more than confused at your outburst, but you wouldn’t talk to him anymore after that so he left you alone. He thought you may need an hour or two, maybe a day tops, but that day turned into a full week and he even lost his appetite just because he knows you’re angry with him. It’s been a week, does that mean you’re over? His heart aches just at the thought… 
“I’m sorry for bringing Belphie up… I don’t want you to feel less than, MC. You mean a lot to me and so does Belphie, but you’re not Belphie and I need to learn that…”
Belphegor:
Honestly it’s a miracle he hasn’t lost his temper at you yet. Well, he partially blames it on his own laziness because if being angry or getting upset didn’t take so much energy out of him, maybe he would’ve snapped by now lol, but he tries really hard not to because he thinks your relationship with him after everything is pretty good, considering yall kiss and snuggle and fuck on a regular basis. But anyway, that’s exactly the issue. Considering everything, you’re still holding *that* against him. It’s never direct either, which makes it worse. It’s always said in a joking manner and something like “haha look it’s just like that one time you killed me” or “Beel’s grabbing that ham like you grabbed my throat” or “I remember seeing jesus for a moment there” and it agitates him. It makes him so angry, and he finally snapped. “I know I fucked up MC! Stop holding it against me! What do you want? A medal of honor? A survivor's certificate? Maybe a pat on the back for developing some sort of Stockholm syndrome that made you come back to your abuser?!” And then he left. And you may have cried both from confusion and your own anger, he isn’t quite sure. It’s just so…. Aggravating. He can’t deal with it. He knows it was a mistake spurted by his own insecurities and survivor’s guilt which ultimately led to his hatred but please, stop holding it against him.. He can’t keep putting up with it from the person he’s grown to love. He’s the one ignoring you and he won’t budge either because he’s a stubborn ass, but maybe if you come up first… 
“I’m sorry for yelling at you… I’m just so tired for it being held against me… I love you, and you should know that, and I do feel guilty about what happened.” 
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drpepperwithcream · 3 years
Text
Gang of Secrets Aftermath
Because I want it and I’m a writer so *hands you head canon post on a silver platter*
Alya hugs the absolute crap out of Marinette as she ends up sobbing into her shoulder from stress and exhaustion.
Alya is soothing Marinette, eyeing the widows, doors, and every crack an akuma could squeeze in through.
Even long after Marinette has stopped crying, they were still hugging. She took comfort in Alya’s arms around her.
“...Alya?”
“Yeah?”
“Thank you.”
Alya squeezed her tighter. Marinette deserved this.
“I’ll always be here for you, Marinette. Don’t you forget that.”
They pulled apart, Marinette wiped the tear stains off her cheeks and she huffed out a small laugh.
“I’m surprised you’re taking this so well.”
“I’m holding it in. You really needed a friend.”
Marinette smiled as she braced herself. “You can let it out now.”
Alya breathed as she stood up. She went over to Marinette’s computer and pulled up a picture of Ladybug and made it fullscreen. She looked at Marinette, then to the Ladybug picture, then back to Marinette.
*inhales*
“I... I can’t believe it! My best friend! You- You’re Ladybug! How could I have not seen it? I mean I know I couldn’t have seen it, but you’re fighting Hawkmoth and saving Paris everyday!” Alya stammers. “When? Wait I know when, but how? I just- It’s been you this whole time. Everything makes since now, you being late, odd excuses, why you picked me to be Rena Rouge. I feel like my brain is exploding!”
Marinette laughed.
Alya replayed today’s events and relaxed. “But wait, Ladybug said that she’s now the guardian when she-you gave me the necklace, which makes you the guardian. What does that even mean? Actually, no don’t tell me, it’s probably incredibly important and stressful, and you’ve been having a stressful time, I don’t want to add to that.”
Marinette sighed. “No, it’s fine, it just means I have a lot of responsibility now on top of being Ladybug.” It felt so weird to say that to her best friend, but it felt like a huge weight was being lifted off her shoulders.
“I’ll help you in any and every way I can, you can count on me.”
“Thanks Alya.”
Alya goes home and marinates with this new information.
She swore on her life that she wouldn't tell a single sole this information
As she’s pacing in her room, she’s debating on completely deleting the LadyBlog.
She ends up spending hours completely reformatting the website. Taking down the “Who’s Ladybug” posts and adding a couple of mental health posts. She makes a post about giving back to Ladybug and Chat Noir by working together to figure out who Hawkmoth is.
As she’s reviewing her LadyBlog, she finds a few old videos The first one was Ladybug noticing her in a sea of reporters and commenting her on her work on the LadyBlog (The Mime episode). Marinette did that for her, and she smiled at how sweet that was of her to do.
The second video was her first actual interview with Ladybug (also Mime). She remembered how Marinette thought she deleted the first video so she stole her phone to try to recreate it, and when she couldn’t she gave her a surprise. Alya didn’t even know how she managed to convince Ladybug to give her an interview back then but now it’s obvious. Marinette is such a good friend!
The third was about Lila, talking about how Ladybug saved her and how close the two of them are. And suddenly Marinette’s hatred for Lila made sense.
“That Bit-!”
Alya deleted the video and whipped out her phone.
Mari, I am sorry for ever trying to defend Lila and that it took me this long to realize that she’s a liar.- A
Oh yeah, I couldn’t exactly tell you that I knew that she didn’t know Ladybug because I am Ladybug-M
Again, sorry for being stupid.-A
It’s okay, at least you know now-M
Dang all the lying she’s doing for attention, I almost feel bad for her-A
Alya remembered what Lila had done.
Wait no I don’t! She got you expelled and nearly akumatized by Scarlet Moth! What a lying snake!-A
She also threatened me in the bathroom that she’d make everyone turn against me if I tried to expose her and her lies and it made me so angry that I was almost akumatized by Hawkmoth -M
I’m actually going to push her down a flight of stairs! I don’t care that you have your ladybug powers, you can’t stop me!-A
Nino also messages her, noticing the website change. Alya said that she wanted to use her skill to find Hawkmoth and help Paris civilians. Nothing more.
She spends the rest of the night staying up late researching ways to control emotions and to keep anger and other strong emotions at bay. If Hawkmoth akumatizes her, it’s all over, and she’s never going to let that happen again.
Alya falls asleep thinking about Marinette being Ladybug this whole time.
And whatever hardships Marinette had to deal with, Alya was ready to give her a boost to fight it all.
Should I write more? I want to write more. I will write more.
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