#i am so so so so anxious and idk why!!!!! we found a house just need to get two of our roommates subleased from their apartments so it's not

[gentlethorns]

i have always been and will always be utterly fucking insane. help

[aita-blorbos]

Am... i the... jerk for killing people... or for making a show. a fake one

hi. im so happy i can talk to people with my computer like this. i didn't know i could do that but now I can. It took me some time to find this place though.

a while back I sort of... died. it's hard to remember. It was kinda a long time ago, maybe ten years I think. But then I got teleported to this place with a radio. i flipped through some channels and after some time it teleported me to this other world. I decided to stay there because I didn't wanna lose it. The world was pretty nice. It had pretty trees and even some houses and a fountain.

But I was sort of lonely. There was no one besides mee and. I didn't like that.

There was also this.. computer.. it was a weird computer and kinda hard to control at the time but I figured it out. This computer eventually let me make a world and let me teleport people to here! I wanted to see people. There was no one around the forest where I lived so I didn't see anyone alive or dead in a looong time. So I teleported them to my small little world. they were so small but I was giant. It was kinda weird but it was funn!! seeing people like me just there on my little planet right next to me, moving and being tiny. So I teleported some more people.

they got kind of anxious and scared for some reason. so I just told them it was a competition. I thought it would be fun.! there were gonna be eliminations and challenges! And whoever won all the challenges they would be the winner! and anyone who lost would be eliminated.

so we moved on.. one of them would be eliminated soon because he lost the challenge. so I wanted to make the second challenge. I would make challenges by putting stuff I found around my own home on this little world I could control. It was like a globe.

but I accidentally threw a rock on all of them and they all died. At the time I didn't know how to respawn contestants sooooooo. yeah

more time passed. I wanted to learn more about how to make the contest better. because the last contest didn't go very well.

so after some time I spawned in the new contestants. some of them were from my past world. some of them were even from different dimensions!! I thought I did a pretty good job making that competition. I even made clouddss

but the contestants didn't really like me. one of the contestants died but I event respawned them. so I don't get why they were so upset.

after some time I accidentally slipped and fell and I took a break and let all the contestants rest on that planet. They all wanted to go back to earth for some reason. but I didn't want them to go... and also why did they want to go? I thought I made the competition fun..

so after some time idk how long, I got back. and continued the show. none of them wanted to win any more for some reason?.

after some more time passed one of the eliminated contestants somehow got to my home. he was pretty angry at me for some reason. said how I ruined all their lives and how I like stabbing babies? I thought it would be a fun game

I went to a walk. he followed me

he ,ater found my cassette player I lost some time ago. I wanted it. Ack bc it was really good noise. but he said he would only give me the cassette player if I teleported all the remaining contestants back to earth. but I could do that because. I didn't want to. but I ditll wanted that cassette player

later I walked back to my house where the computer was. he followed me and he accidentally slipped on the way and fell by a waterfall. he cried also idk why I think because his paper notes all got wet? I don't get it

we later talked

later I was on my computer again. I was planning another season of my show. because I knew that soon the game would end and I would be alone again. I picked some people that knew the contestants from the recent game because I thought they were all pretty good players

but the one guy who had my cassette player saw my plans of another season by looking at my computer and got pretty angry at me. then he tried killing me with an axe then he accidentally hit a tree with an axe and then broke his leg. I carried him to one of the houses and got him a cast. I don't understand why did he try to hit me? Did he want me to die? I was just planning to make a fun game nothing else

Later I went by the same waterfall he fell by and then I fell. But he fell in the water. I fell on the ground. And then I died

so I got sent to a place.

It's confusing

I don't think I'm a jerk. I just made a fun game show for everyone!! I thought it would be fun. but he did look really angry for some reason?

I also still feel kinda bad for those people I killed. I didn't mean to it was an accident I'm sorryy

Anyway please talk to me! I want to talk to people!! I didn't know u could do that!!

[fight-the-corn]

Avengers x soulmate reader chapter eight

AN: I'm sorry I've been gone for so long! I'm finally back! I'm hoping to post a couple updates soon, but idk how motivated I'll be! Merry Christmas everyone!

Tw:abuse!

You had been living with the Avengers for almost a week, wearing Natasha's clothes. Tony had told you in private that there was no reason for you to go back to your house, and it had been tempting to try. Unfortunately, you had some keepsakes that were very important to you and you had to go back and get them, or you would never rest easy. Little things like photos with your old friends that you could never forget were worth the world to you.

Today was the day you decided to go. Tony insisted on coming with you, because what kind of a soulmate would be be if he let his little soulmate into a place that would traumatize her with one wrong move alone? He had agreed not to take any of the other Avengers, just telling them you and he were going out.

Arriving at your house, you took a deep breath.

"Tony is here. I am safe. He won't let me get hurt.". You repeated to yourself over and over, convincing yourself it was true as you walked up to the front door. You raised your hand to knock, took a deep breath, glanced back at Tony who have you a reassuring smile from the bottom of the steps, then knocked there times.

You heard footsteps, before the door was thrown open.

"Finally decided you were good enough for this family huh? Get in here.". Your father grabbed your wrist and roughly dragged you into the room. Within 3 seconds, he was pinned on the wall with Tony's hand on his throat.

" You don't get to touch her like that. You show her the respect that she deserves. Clear? " Tony wasn't planning on taking any shit from your dad.

"And who might you be?" Your father growled. " has the little whore finally gotten someone to hire her? She's an annoying little slut, don't you think? "

"I'd say nice to meet you, but that would be as far from the truth as possible. My name is Tony Stark, and I am her soulmate. She is not a 'little whore' or a 'slut' and I would advise you against referring to her as such in the future. We will grab her things, then be out of your hair for the rest of your lives, so let her get her things without a problem and I won't hurt you.

"But why do you want her? Have you seen her?" Your mom asked. "I mean, you're Tony Stark, you can get any hot model or woman in general! Why would you want this girl, with flab and frizzy hair? "

Instead of responding to her, Tony turned to you. "Go grab whatever you want princess, i'll chat with your parents."

You nodded, and within ten minutes you had your bag packed and ready to go, leave this life forever. You were holding back tears, anxious that your parents had finally made him see that you weren't worth it.

However, when you walked in the room, you were surprised to see Tony standing with his arms crossed and your parents looking... Guilty?

You looked at him and nodded that you were ready to go and he silently guided you out. You made it to the car and got situated while he started driving before asking him.

"Hey Tony?"

" yeah princess? "

"What did you and my parents talk about?"

" I just told them the truth. You are a wonderful girl who is very loved in her new home, and they had no right to treat you how they did. I told them that they had wasted all the years they had had with you and it's possible that they would never see you again. I told them that you had finally found a place where you were valued and I hope that they regret their past actions. "

You didn't know how to respond. Your eyes started to fill with tears of happiness and love, feeling like the most special girl in the world to have lucked out with these soulmates.

Tony pulled you out of your thoughts. "Was that ok? Did I cross a line? I'm sorry princess."

You shook your head. "I love you Tony ." you said. " thank you. "

"Of course baby. Anything for you.". He kissed your head , and the rest of the drive home was quiet.

[ventingbeec]

State of minds and the way your body feels

So i recently realised how feelings influence so much the way you see the world around you.

Idk how to elaborate it but i want to tell an experience i had.

So when i was younger for some reason i was afraid or idk to shop. Exactly, i was anxious about shopping in supermarkets. I don’t really know why?

Maybe because i thought people are staring at me and judging me, or maybe because i was low on money?!

So i found a picture where my friend showed me she bought a cup of noodles, and i remember i really wanted to try but for some reason i never searched for it, and even the few times i went with my mom at shopping and found something i wanted i would just leave it.

So now thinking about it it sounds so pathetic but back then it was such a blockage for me to do the most basic things.

Right now i can spend hours in supermarkets, its the lamest thing ever, so why did i put that experience on a pedestal??

Another thing i used to put on pedestal when i was younger was a white pencil. I really really wanted a white pencil and i thought it was such an amazing thing, and when i bought my first one i was so happy, but then i coul afford to buy more so got a lot feon different brands to test them out and even now i have them, maybe for like 8 years?? They are around the house but i don’t care about them, they are lame, but i used to think omg such an amazing thing.

So my conclusion is that we tend to put such insignificant things on pedestal and think we can’t approach them when in real life they are lame af. But still i don’t have any wise advice to give tbh. I still want insignificant things, and i still think im not worthy having them when in reality they are probably very approachable, how to stop this?

So for example, i really want to be tall, like 5’7, can i really do this? probably? do i know how to? maybe idk? is there anything that’s stopping me? most certainly.

So because this is my vent blog anyways, i will talk nonsense.

1. I want to be tall because i want to or because others judge me cus im short?

I will enumerate some moments people judged my height.

1. My mom

so my mom always tells me i would be more beautiful if i was taller

when i was younger she would tell me to work out to grow taller

she pushed me to do a lot of things to grow taller

she always judge other short women calling them names so maybe i feel she thinks the same about me

do i want to be tall just to make my mom happy? i want this for her? i want to look a certain way so that she would stop judging me just for existing?? why does she wants this? shy can’t she love me just for who i am, if i was even more shorter shat would she think about me??

omg i feel like im about to throw tf up right now

i never realised i feel like this

how can i stop this?

am i worth it? probably, but how do i stop hating myself and caring what others think about me

i feel maybe they would never like me even if i was 7’1 so then what’s wrong with me? do i want to grow just to ignore them after and prove something? but i don’t heve to prove anything to anyone, am i right?

the only person i should care about it’s me

so is height really that important?

but i don’t know how to care about myself anymore?? what do i do?? skincare??

i’m so confused

i really want to fit in the society beauty standard so bad, i want people to accept me amd love and admire me

but why??? why do i care so much??

if i would have loved myself then would i care anymore about what others think?? idk how to live myself

i don’t think i have to do anything to love myself, i should do it just because i exist, but why do i feel so weird then

why do i want to prove something when i shouldn’t

2. my dad

i feel like i care about his male gaze

not in a weird way, but in a “i think my child it’s ugly way”

idk if you know that movie when a girl turns into a pig, like, her nose is pig like

and at some point her dad told her mom that

“we have to admit, we have an ugly daughter “

that line, that scene, why is that in my mind? why did it stuck from the moment hear it??!

it passed more than a decade but that line is my roman empire

why do i care about this so much

now that i write this, i never realised how much i cared about my parents opinion about my outside appearance but i do

i do a lot until it eats me alive

one time i was sitting at the dinner table and so my dad stared at me and then smirked

so my mom asked him why

and he giggled and said “look how much X looks like her grandfather”

my grandfather who is first of all a man, second of all a big, crooked, septum deviated, nosed man

i remember that moment so vividly, i wanted to disappear in that moment so nobody could ever see my face ever again

never

i don’t hate the way my grandfather looks, but i am aware of how he’s seen by the society

and i am aware that remark wasn’t something nice but something to point out ugly features

one time when was really into selfcare

and i really wanted to drink a gallon of water a day for health and also clear skin

my father overheard my discussion and he intervened saying that “where could that much water go through your body? for you maybe one cup of water a day”

and for me, that didn’t seem funny

that shattered me, i hate it, i hate so much being perceived

i hate so much being made fun of

i don’t want to look the way i look anymore

i hate me, i hate the way i look

why am i like this, why am i so weak? so skinny?? and some of you will sat it’s something good but it’s not, as a grown up woman i look like a little boy, i feel less of a woman

i feel im not worthy, i feel like i deserve absolutely nothing and i don’t understand why was i born and why am i still alive to suffer

i do i care a lot about shat people say about me

because in our society it matters a lot how people perceive you

i wish i didnt care but i do

i wish i was different but im not

i wish i could look like the beauty standards

i wish i could make my parents happy

i wish i could prove something

i wish i was loved and appreciated

i wish i wouldn’t have to hate myself so much

i wish i could just live in silence and be happy and eat and wash my body and sleep and play and do things i like and love myself

i wish i could just love the way i looked

everything about me

even my big crooked nose

i wish i could truly love it but it bought me so much pain

so much pain

for just existing and not bothering anyone it attracted so much pain

why do i have to look a certain way to not be bullied???!!!

why do we all have to look the same

after some pattern

i think i should stop caring about others

even my mom or dad but it’s kind of hard

[draiochteve]

A continuation of my new step in life

I know I've been scarce, but I've been so busy I just haven't taken the time to drown myself on socials like I use to.

It's been almost a week since he landed and my world has changed so much. My parents are upset he didn't stay with us longer and wanted to rush to the apartment, but as stated before he can only handle them for so long. He's settle in and despite being homesick and having his frustrations (it is a culture shock for sure) he is adjusting well. All of his things arrived and we are slowly filling up the apartment with our lives.

I've spent nearly every day with him, only coming home when my family demands which is at night. Why the fuck they thing preventing me from spending the night will stop us from fucking is beyond me and my uncle also finds it ridiculous, but he's at least helping protect us and giving us plenty of time alone before my shifts. I've honestly really considered walking over to the courthouse and just getting shit done to avoid having to come home again, but I know that will cause more issues than solve problems rn.

I've gotten to play more of FFXVI and I'm just falling in love with new inspirations again. We can watch whatever movies and shows we want pretty openly without fear of someone barging in. I get the joy of finishing work and easily walking over to our apartment to settle into his arms and relax. We are as content in doing our own things as we are snuggling on the couch. It's very peaceful and it makes me mourn how long it's taken to get to this point.

As embarrassing as this is to admit (and this is pretty traumatizing I will warn), I am a touch starved person. I am in the situation where upon developing enough in my AFAB body around 13, all the men in the family (which is most of everyone in the house) were ordered to no longer touch me. It's a long conversation about how easily sexualized I was and considered a temptation to even my own brothers 8+ years older than me, and there is an even longer conversation to be had about how fucking common this is in evangelical households, but I have not the energy.

That background, however, has always left me in an odd spot with intimacy and relationships. I am easily overwhelmed yet crave the physical. I've never been able to find a happy medium in past relationships and this one was hard for me to prepare for as we've been dominantly long distance for so long. I knew when we were together that I felt more comfortable than with anyone else, but with what fleeting time we had there is no proper judge of how that will be in the long term. But this...there is a balance I've needed all this time I finally have. Dalton is patient and attentive. He is understanding and we compliment each other well. Maybe it's just because we are two traumatized, anxious people that it just ends up working out idk. But whatever it is, it's working.

To top it off, we've done so much exploring around town it's amazing. Something that's always fucking bothered me is my family sheltered me terribly after I was born and seemingly forgot they did so. Where my brothers grew up walking around the town I will be living in, I never did. My biggest outings were shopping or when my old friends would sneak me out way outside of the range my parents agreed to. This means I know next to nothing about the town I will be living in despite living not so far away from it and my parents have a habit of looking at me shocked when I say I never have been to that local drug store or the coffee shop around the corner. It's because I haven't because I was rarely if ever able to. They did it a million times growing up and just lost touch I suppose.

But today, I got to finally have those firsts. We walked 2-3 miles today. I found paths and walkways I've never seen before. Explored stores I never knew existed. Got to see so much that always been right here yet I never got to see. To Dalton it was a pretty boring walk to get his general bearings around town, to me it was an adventure. And he realized as much really fast and ended up walking way more than he really wanted to just so I could get a better taste of what freedom will be. I have blisters, but each one was worth it. And soon, I'll be able to walk these ways on my own. Why aren't I already you may be asking? Because I can't risk family or my father driving to a customer seeing me alone because I am not allowed to walk anywhere in town alone (I've done it a couple times secretly but they were brief and I more or less jogged to get where I wanted and back before I was missed). I can only have that should my husband decide it's okay and unfortunately Dalton is not yet. The entire situation really pisses him off and I know how frustrated he is by it, but I appreciate him deeply taking the time to navigate that and spend a day wasting time exploring.

September 30th and these stupid fucking games will be over with. September 30th and I am released from a fucking life I never asked for.

So why am I typing all of this here? To document it I suppose. To scream out to the world this is happening and did happen. This is where I am right now -- on the cusp of what should have been mine a long time ago.

I'm sorry fic updates are not coming, but I need this release and relief. I feel like I'm finally living. And while I will eventually return to my keyboard and phone, that is not what I am to do right now. I've spent most of my life escaping in my head. Now, I don't necessarily have to. So, I thank everyone again for the patience with me. And I thank everyone for their well wishes last update. I'm sorry I startled/disturbed some with the details of my life. I haven't been too secretive, but they've been said in places easy to miss or lose. This is a little more solid.

I've been in a fucked up place for so long. I've been suffering for so long and not rocking the boat for my own safety. It has to be known because this is a part of me even if it's one I am finally moving passed.

It's finally happening.

[whoslaurapalmer]

ooooooo it's time for a lulu makes her way through therapy update 🪅

- yesterday was psychiatrist day and my brother had to drive me which was very thrilling for all involved, because the psychiatrist was initially my brother's and has known my brother since he was a teenager and saw us both in the waiting room and got so excited and went '!!!!!! is this a switch?? am I seeing both of you??? Or are you here just for the purposes of transportation' and I said HE'S JUST TRANSPORTATION TODAY

- what's nice about him is that even if he was the one who prescribed the prozac he doesn't push me on it at ALL. EVERYONE keeps saying 'why wont you take it?' and He's like, 'no lulu, you don't have to. It's okay if it's just there. Quite frankly. I don't know if you need it right now?' Which was very nice!! because I've been doing very well lately!!!!! not super focused if at all on my breathing or anxiety or panic!!!!!! And it's nice to hear SOMEONE ELSE say 'you sound like you're doing really good!!' but also acknowledge that that doesn't mean the end of talking to people about my problems or not trying to do different things!!

- it's so fucking stupid every damn time when most of my problems are in fact solved by drinking more water. that's what I really focused on this month. And trying to eat a good amount. And trying to be more like. It sounds so STUPID to say mindful but that's what it is!! When I start to panic I started saying hello to everything in the room. and myself more frequently in mirrors. I get so stuck in my head and can't get out of it and give anxiety and panic so much weight that trying to refocus outside of me helped a lot. I also started a gratitude app and I do it twice a day and that's nice too!!!! For really appreciating little things about my town and my house and the things I interact with and the people I know. It's helpful to make myself notice more about where I always am and that's not bad.

- BUT MEANWHILE so I told him, I am trying to placebo effect myself.

- my psychiatrist: ..........explain 🤔

- so I wanted to take SOMETHING for my anxiety. But I cannot do side effects. But I figured, the brain can be tricked and rerouted, right?? because it's silly like that!!! so I just have to reroute it a specific way!! And I can PRETEND I'm taking something for anxiety!! so I was looking for something that like. Idk, would 1) look like a pill 2) be something that I could take like a pill but also WHENEVER, whenever I was anxious too. I tried to do it with like things I already take, like sinus stuff and vitamins, but I might switch sinus meds again depending on how this month's ENT goes, and I figured it'd be better to have something that I registered as SPECIFICALLY for anxiety, and not multiple things.

- I picked altoids!!!!! I really wanted a mint bc mint is distracting on its own being so potent. I let them dissolve under my tongue for maximum vibes and so the mint experience lasts as long as possible. I have one in the morning and one in the afternoon at vaguely the same time and started out thinking each time 'I'm taking this to help with my anxiety' and within a few weeks my brain morphed it into 'don't forget to take your anxiety medication :) ' which we both found FASCINATING.

-I don't know if it IS helping??? Especially bc at the same time i DID up the eating and water. But it is a Thing!!!! and I like it a lot!!!!!! So maybe it is helping too!!!!!!

- my psychiatrist: we should tell altoids. they're missing out on a marketing angle. anyway this is very exciting! The placebo effect is so intriguing.

[hacked-by-jake]

Hey 😬 I finnaly finished ep 10 (late bc i wasnt in the mood... yeah im ashamed) AND I need to ask

At the end of ep10, at the very end of the video, whan Hannah looks up... she sees Jake right? Do people think that too? This was my first tought, I was so anxious if he got out 😣 So I wanna think she sees him... but then again, I thing he would be probably be hiding straight away... IDK!hope he's fine

Also, did MC figured out why the group was sent their number? I dont think i missed that

Hey Ho! :D Ohh, don’t be ashamed, I can understand that very well, don’t worry.

And yes, we’re pretty sure Hannah sees Jake. And most have the theory that Jake was arrested by the FBI and Hannah saw it when he got out of the mine.

The most often have the theory that it will be the basis for the new game of Everbyte. That Jake was arrested and we now have to help the FBI and help him to be free again.

I still hope they didn’t arrest him because it would be terrible but I think it happened and the cliffhanger is just there to tell us a bit about the new game. :(

And no, don’t worry, have not missed that with MC’s number because it was not discussed in the game.

Most have the theory that the number was not a phone number, but the number from the receipt that Hannah found that Richy lost in front of Amys house.

We know that Hannah had contact with Jake and Alan just before she was kidnapped. So we all suspect that Hannah wanted to send the number to one of the two so that they can find out who it belongs to and then find out who is behind the mask of the man without a face. We suspect, however, that Hannah did not have enough time in the stress and therefore had sent the number to Thomas. Whether on purpose or not, I don’t know, I don’t think on purpose. And I think Thomas then assumed that it is a phone number and wrote this number. The number that was not supposed to be a mobile number was then the number of us, so MC. 🤔

Unfortunately, these are all just conjectures but I am sure that these are true and that Everbyte has done everything on purpose so that we can be detectives and find out for ourselves in real. 😅

I hope I could help you somehow and I hope that you liked the episode and you had fun. Thanks for your question and time. And I hope you will have a wonderful day/evening/night! Take care of yourself and stay healthy! :D

[lemony-snickers]

Hey jelly🐈 here again!

I like the idea of whumptober! That sounds fun to participate in. I enjoy doing kinktober but it's more the writing exercise for me than anything. I like to stick to kinks I enjoy and I mostly write y/n and reader content anyway so I don't get too involved in the ships. I'm curious about the horror themed content you had thought up. I'm huge into halloween and horror.

😘 you really are a sweet person. I look forward to when you reply to my asks. I'm a coward for not just messaging you but I guess I've always been an anxious mess. I'm scared of rejection a lot. I'm afraid if you knew who I was, you'd probably make fun of me. But that's not an attack on you, I'm just an anxious person and I think everyone is going to make fun of me.

Hope your day goes so well and that you find money on the ground! Cause finding money on the ground is such a good feeling ❤ you deserve nothing but the best

oh, my sweet little jelly, you do not have to defend your decision to remain anonymous to me. some of my mutuals could tell you i am in their inbox constantly, but never with my name attached.

idk why, i just like it better that way myself. <3

and i think *no one likes me* always, even the people who say they do. i recently had a fun mental health day where i left all my group chats and naruto servers on discord for this reason.

i am a Grade-A Certified Disaster Person, lmao.

can i tell you the last time i found money on the ground was a long time ago, but it was at a pop up market in a park near my house. and it was four hundred dollar bills!!!! (i know right, who the fuck carries that on themlajsdf;lasjdfsad anyway.)

i just sort of stood there for a long time holding this money and looking at my partner wondering what to do. because you can't just say, "did somebody drop $400?" because i'm pretty sure several people who did not drop it would say they did, you know?

we were in front of this stand selling antique camera stuff (i have a collection but it's all from my family, so i wasn't actually buying anything it was all waaaayyyy too expensive) and i just sort of stepped off to the side.

i told my partner to keep an eye out for anyone who looked like they had lost something and a few minutes later there was a man with his son who seemed so panicked. they were scanning the ground and turning around and you could just tell, you know?

so i walked over and asked if they were missing something and the dad said yes and then i asked him what he was missing and he said he'd dropped $400. so i gave it back to him and maaaannnn the relieved look on his face, he was so grateful and listen, i won't lie, i was disappointed i didn't get to keep that money because that's a big deal for me--and would have been even more so at the time--but it was a cool moment.

and then, while we were leaving the park a few minutes later, he ran up behind me and gave me $20 as a thank you! so i did sort of find money even though i didn't keep what i actually found, ahaha.

anyway. this probably reads as one of those "that didn't happen" stories you see on social media or whatever, but that's fine because it did happen and it's a nice memory so i thought i would share.

i dreamt last night that i went back to college (well sort of it was like a weird robot island but apparently that was college? idk dreams are weird, man) and i was studying makeup fx which was always a passion of mine i wish i had pursued more.

maybe it's a sign i really do need to get back to loving halloween somehow.

i hope you have a great day, my little jelly. i'm sorry i rambled so hard on this, i slept in and so i just woke up like an hour ago & i am fresh into my first cup of coffee, going about 9000 mph, lol.

take care, my dear. <3

[moonjxsung]

hai hai! (anticipated srry for the yapping)

how are you?

(btw pls lmk about that person bc if they come back i rlly don’t want to interact)

sorry about the fire vjj jumpscare😂😂

kitties can rip their toe beans and i am so traumatized by it. thankfully it really wasn’t too bad like he never acts like it’s hurting him. i literally let him out of his travel bag and bro just immediately jumped like an hour after surgery. but we’re keeping him confined until further notice and trying to figure out what happened bc we searched everywhere and no blood or anything. but he’s doing alright & they take out his stitches in two weeks, my angel baby☹️☹️☹️.

i’m sorry to hear about your kitty’s itching! cats do become sensible to environmental changes so it may be that. one of the strays we feed gets runny nose/eyes when there’s a lot of pollen. i heard that giving them bee pollen helps with their environmental allergies. but i haven’t really tried it. maybe something with her food? my senior dog (who passed about two years ago) became allergic to chicken, turkey, and like a million other things) at like 10yrs old. so if it persists that could maybe be a cause? idk but i hope she feels better soon, i hate seeing sick kitties :((

to end the cat discourse, your neighbor!! im so frustrated when people let cats just roam free in environments where they shouldn’t. i’m not really in favor of outdoor/indoor or just outdoor kitties (aside from stray babies ofc, i wish i could take them all💔). my experience with cats outdoors (like not mine but the strays i’ve seen) is always sooooo negative that i just wouldn’t do it, even if where i lived was more appropriate. i had a neighbor (i never interacted with her) who literally abandoned her male intact cat and he just went around getting everyone pregnant and crying at her house. i haven’t seen him for a while bc he wasn’t really a regular (if he was i would’ve found a way to neuter him at least) but that’s so freaking sad, man. i really can’t with people who leave their pets to fend for themselves. so yeah your neighbor really sucks, and the kitty fights with your baby? whaaat? that’s crazy.

and i still can’t get over ateez!!! my bf and i live together so we’re literally always together (that’s why i annoyingly mention him all the time, im sorry, i got anxious attachment 😂). and i was rewatching the coachella performance bc im crazy and he sat down with me (and eventually fell asleep) but not before saying “my bias isn’t mingi anymore, san is just the man here” and i was like ok but mood. i love san so much and yk one of my bias line criteria is ✨cats✨ so san is not only cat emoji but also has a cat ✅✅ i love them, i need to go see them at least once in my life too. they’re just so talented, im so proud of them for coming so far! 😭

and pls send all the pics ever if you do go to txt, i’ll live vicariously through you.

anddd i was lurking through your other asks and i feel you so badly about retinol & sunscreen. i literally have some expression lines and am dying to get rid of them. but im struggling with retinol bc it makes me break out.

(and also, ur response to the anon talking about her y/n moment was too sweet. i feel like kpop can set such high beauty standards that you have to constantly ground yourself bc these people live and breath visuals and voice/dance lessons. i struggle a lot with body image issues being a US midsize and having pcos -and i literally got an emergency ovary removal, not so fun fact! it was terrible and it really fucked up my weight gain/loss- but yeah, your message made me feel better about everything too.)

ily ily bb! we’re currently on a date at a café, drinking iced coffee with our ateez pcs! 😘😘😘

-🐈‍⬛

HELLOOOOO MY SWEET ANGEL HAPPY SUNDAYYYY 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶

I still can’t believe cats can rip their toe beans 😭😭 it makes so much sense but I just hadn’t considered it and now I’m watching Momo like a HAWK over here I feel like that would so happen to her 😭😭 her itching seems a little better today but seems like it comes and goes ! One of my other cats at my parents’ house struggles from feline eczema or something similar and she has to get steroid injections to tame the flare ups so im hoping it’s not that ☹️ but good to know that bee pollen helps, ill definitely look into that!! Thank you bby 🫶👼

UGH I KNOWWWW her cat disappears for weeks at a time too and I’m like how!!! Are you not worried about where he is!!!!!!! One time he came back with a collar I’m assuming somebody got for him and since then they’ve taken it off so it seems like they’re pretty set on just making him appear stray and I don’t understand the reasoning behind it. All their other pets (they have like 2 dogs I think) are strictly indoors so idk why poor kitty has to be abandoned like that ☹️ I always bring him water and food in the summer because they don’t even leave him with food but I’m just so annoyed they don’t do it themselves ughhh. Also I have a neighbor who did the same thing as yours by abandoning their cat and it went around and got pregnant like 4 times since then ! She passed at a pretty young age probably due to the shortened life span and it was just so heartbreaking. At LEAST get your cat spayed and neutered ffs 🤕

YOUR BF IS SOOOO REAL FOR THAT LMAOOOO 😭 Ateez are crazy talented in person!!! They’re coming back to my city in the summer so I need to start saving and I’m lowkey panicking bc I really want to see itzy, Ateez, txt and NCT Dream but I’m gonna have to sacrifice some shows because money 😀 I might scrap Dream only bc I’m not 100% if Renjun will still be there (my pookie💔) but I cannotttt decide if I want to go to the other shows. If I find txt tickets at a decent price I will 10000% keep you updated how it goes!!!! I also need to see Itzy so bad ugh Ryujin my wife💔

I’m so glad we’re all panicking about expression lines collectively LMAO I just bought this Korean sunscreen that claims to prevent them so we’ll see but the lingering fear of aging is always present 😭 soooo agreed about the body image thing!! Kpop made me hate my body like ten times more then I already did but I have to remind myself these people HAVE to look good for a living like if they had my regular ass job they would not look like that 😭 I just value confidence the most even on days I hate myself!! I’m so sorry to hear about your emergency ovary removal ahhh that must’ve been so scary but I’m so grateful you’re okay and healthy now! Looks mean nothing if you’re not healthy guys take care of yourselves and love the body you have 🥹🫶💞💝💘💕💖

I LOVE YOU BBYYYYY we’re virtually eating cheese danishes together bc I caved and got one (it’s so good if you’re wondering) 💞🫶

[the-invisible-queer]

cactus, chia, camellia, chamomile?

Cactus: Something you're currently learning about?

At this very moment? Nothing. However, I do have a history post I have to write for Monday so I'll be either learning more about PL Travers resentment for the Mary Poppins movie OR Rod Stewart doing cocaine up his ass. Whichever I can find more information on and write an interesting post about.

Chia: What's an inside joke you have with someone else?

So when we were younger, my dad used to take my brothers and I on drives to look at mansions in our state. And one time we passed by a few houses with the Free Masons emblem on their brick wall. And my brothers and I had no idea what it was but my dad said it was bad so everytime my brothers and I saw the Free Masons emblem one of us - usually me - would make a quiet scared scream or a gasp. And then it evolved to us just going "dun dun duuunnn"

Camellia: What were you like when you were younger? Do you think you've changed a lot?

Still annoying. Still obsessive. Less self-aware. WAY more apologetic to take up space.

Literally who I am RIGHT NOW is so similar to who I was in 2008. Like this whole Jonas Brothers obsession is weird because been there done that and now I'm back. Just more horny.

I've changed by becoming more anxious, more depressed but less apologetic about existing. Though I still have abandonment issues so I try to take less room as to not scare anyone away.

Chamomile: What kind of things do you like receiving as gifts?

I appreciate anything in the form of "this made me think of you". Doesn't have to be physical. One of my best friends sent me a TikTok last night and was like "idk why but they remind me of you". Just to know people think of me makes me soft because I've always been the last resort, last chosen, most excluded person in every scenario - even with my own family.

BUT if you're wondering what to get me for my birthday I am accepting rocks. I am going to be 27 and have decided I want to start collecting rocks again.

I used to collect rocks as a kid. Literally had a suitcase full of them, but one day my mom decided to be a cunt and made me empty my entire suitcase in the backyard and I wasn't allowed to bring any rocks inside the house - if she found one she'd beat me.

And I've been yearning for my rocks again for decades.

[skinni-girls-eat-books]

Wednesday, December 27th, 2023

Why have the past few days been so hard I don't even understand. It's like I know all of the tools to help myself and heal, but like sleeping for example. I know I need to get enough sleep but I keep waking up extremely upset and it's ruining my mornings. I know I need to eat better but I barely have an appetite. I'm on my period and I absolutely fucking hate it. I think I may have some period-related distress disorder or something because this just can't be normal. I wish there was something I could take like an aspirin but instead of pain it would alleviate ridiculous mood swings. My period makes me feel so out of control of my body and so uncomfortable. I'm glad I have found a way to skip it for the most part, but then when I do have one it's 20x worse!!?? So either have it a quarter of the year being a nuisance or 4x a year but terrible?? Idk fml. I feel like a fucking teenager again which is 100% not my fucking speed. I am grown I want to act grown in so tired of bs people and bs situations and bs "how things should go" when it comes to social situations. I don't know how to fucking date anymore and I feel like so FUCKED UP from this past relationship. I'm so used to wringing myself dry, squeezing every drop of myself into someone just to get completely fucked over and forgotten about. I can't do that shit again. But if it's not 100%, what the fuck is it?? 10% 20% 50%? I can't imagine giving 50% of myself to someone I don't fucking know. Maybe like 5% haha. That's expendable, but is that enough to garner anything serious?? Or just a bunch of bs????? Help me please anyone 🙃

7:41am seriously coming to terms with how fucked up my last relationship was. And coming to terms with the fact that it has fucked me uP. I do need therapy tbh that would be an investment for me this year. Idc if it's through the school or not their wait-list is so stupid and long.

I want to be around more women this year, men are just making me lose my fucking mind.

7:21pm just got off of another last minute shift! I called him earlier until he finally picked up bc I can't understand his weird ass games. And weird ass games is 100% correct. He said he "silently cried" in public at his gfs parents house last night bc they kept playing songs that remind him of me.... Bro wtf... I literally don't know what to say to that shit. Then I confronted him about why he took me off everything so abruptly and he basically said that everyone else told him to. He just does whatever everyone else tells him to do, he's such a loser. Then he said that anytime his phone goes off, calls or texts, he gets anxious bc he thinks it's me calling him?? Apparently I make him so anxious now... bc he was the dumb one to get such a paranoid gf a week after we broke up, apparently I'm still the cause of numerous fights between them... Literally tho this is 100% NOT MY FAULT. YOU CANNOT BLAME ME FOR YOUR SHITTY BEHAVIOR. YOU CERTAINLY CANNOT BLAME ME FOR WANTING YOU AFTER YOU TELLING ME REPEATEDLY THAT YOU WANTED ME AND THAT YOU REGRETTED EVERYTHING. HE'S LITERALLY A FUCKING CRAZY NARCISSIST PUSSY BITCH.

I'm fully convinced that he's a narcissist now bc goddamn ALWAYS HE IS THE VICTIM!!!!! This shit is unbelievable!!!!! I don't ever see us getting back together bc like I said previously, the respect is GONE. On top of being an asshole, he literally has no fucking balls and just takes his fragile ego out on anyone he thinks he can treat like shit/ less than him. Goddamn I feel bad for that girl but on the other hand, she gets what she deserves !!! She can have your crazy ass I'm so glad I don't have to deal with this shit anymore!!!! It's like he's reverting backwards too, really acting like a brat ass teenager again, love triangles and generally NOT BEING A MAN AT ALL. Literally he acts like a child with no emotional regulation and it's sad af honestly. It's really just sad. That's why I cry. Not because I miss him, but bc I feel bad that he really is such a fuckup and I thought I could help him. I cry for my own grieving, overly kind heart that I gave to someone so fucking helpless. Beyond help at this point bc there's so many fucking people ENABLING HIS BEHAVIOR. I am literally outnumbered by stupid fucking idiots who think this shit is acceptable. I simply cannot. Good luck bro.

[decayinghearg]

why do all my friends have so much more fun than me ??? we all do basically the same things since we are together 85% of the time but why are they so relaxed ?? they arent stressed like ever ?? i think we were just raised different. i had to be stressed and anxious abt everything to survive. now i feel like i can only have fun when im high, because when im high im not anxious. my mind finally can take a break and i can pause every racing thought i have. they judge me and the fact that im high all the time but i bet if they were me they would want to be high all the time too. it makes me so mad when my bsf ridicules me for smoking everyday. at least im not cutting myself or in the hospital every other month like i used to be. nothing in my life is super negative unless you wanna count how much i smoke. i just can never relax. its always been like that. to relax (not really relax but cope) when i was 13-14 i would just watch anime and cut myself all up in down my arms until i had no more space. now i do the same thing but im smoking weed and happy. if thats helping me cope why is it so bad? reallt tho. whats the worst outcome for smoking weed. the first time i ever smoked weed was september 2021. i was with my bsf (at the time) and my neighbor let us hit his cart. i didnt smoke many times after that until july 2022. since it was summer, i would go over my friends house and he was dating that same friend from the first time i ever smoked. they are still my best friends. from july thru september i would smoke maybe three times a month. until august i met a friend. i was having issues with my july thru september friends so i would hang out with this new friend, he smoked a lot of weed. we would hang out every weekend and get so high i could not walk. around october-november ish, i bought a cart. idk how many but the first one i bought was in october. i didnt have a battery so i would make a crack wire. the friend from sep 2021 found out abt this and called me a fiend, idk and basically just made me feel like shit. even tho !! she smokes every single day… i felt bad abt that. in january i bought my first eighth for a party i thru at my house. february 1st 2023 i bought a cart and a battery and the cart was finished before march. idk why i am writing all of this for tumblr to see. i guess ive just been upset with people judging me for coping in a way thay helps me. i say that but i see myself being too obsessed with weed. in october 2021 with those two friends, i was sucking on that fucking cart my neighbor gave me all night. im always the friend who is down to smoke no matter what. idk maybe i feel this way ibecause my bsf always judges me w how much i smoke. moral of the story, i smoke too much and i dont plan on stopping. i hope this doesnt bite mw in the ass and my whole life crumbles. i dont think it will. i applied to like 10 jobs, i go to school almost everyday, i havent cut since november, things r looking up.

[hotshot624]

I would like to spout off a few different ideas for you for Daddy Eddie x reader stuff please don't feel required to do them all or any of them, I just work better when I do like stream of conciousness writing. And I will submit them individually so you can pick and choose and reply as you write them IF YOU ARE SO INCLINED, these are just requests and suggestions I am just so happy with your first fic I need more daddy eddie pease.

The story of how Midnight the bat stuffy came into little readers life! Like how Eddie gave it to them to show his support this kind of ties in with previous request about finding out how you are little and him accepting it

Part 2: Finding out reader is little/age regressor either by accident or with them telling him because they trust him and wanna have him be their cg fluffiness ensues like he is supportive of it and stuffs"

Hi! So I'm just going to add these two requests together since they're almost the same thing lol. Thank you @bgolightly for requesting this and all of the other things you requested. Y'all are gonna have a lot more content because of them so make sure to say thanks! Again idk how good this is gonna be but for y'alls sake I hope it's worth reading.

Cg!Eddie x Little!Reader: How he found out about Reader Regression (and how Midnight the bat came to be)

Life after accepting to date Eddie was great.

I mean most people wouldn't expect that (and at first you admit you thought so too) but boy were they wrong. They thought Eddie was loud, rude, annoying, self absorbed, and mainly a freak. But that wasn't true. That wasn't true at all.

Eddie Munson had to be one of the nicest, sweetest, most caring, most understanding person you've ever met. He didn't treat you weirdly. He treated you like a normal person with a little personality to it and honestly that was all you could ask for.

The thing he liked about you was that you treated him normally too. You didn't mind the way he liked DnD while others found it weird, you found it interesting even if you didn't exactly want to play it you never put him down for liking it and I guess that's what attracted him to you.

After about 2 and a half months of being friends Eddie decided to ask you out to which you accepted. Which brings us to where we are now which is at your house.

Right now you were setting up your living room for your annual Saturday movie night with Eddie. He went to the video store to go and pick up some movies for you two to watch together, most likely action or horror films sometimes both, it depends on the mood he's in. But while Eddie was deciding what to watch, you had a bigger more important decision to make. One that would alter your relationship for the rest of your lives.

See you were an age regressor to put it simply. That meant that when you got too anxious, were filled with too many negative emotions, or just felt like being younger than you actually are for your enjoyment, you mind would regress you to a certain age. Most people don't get to pick how young they regress to and you couldn't pick either. Usually the more scared or filled with negative emotions the person is, the younger they would regress to, which was the case with you, but everyone is different.

And unfortunately age regression isn't always sunshine and flowers. It can happen at considerably bad times and keep you from doing you need to do. It can also be brought on by something triggering and not be very fun for the regressor or anyone around them. Regressors could also be feeling super upset and cause tantrums and yelling and crying which was also no fun for them or anyone else.

This is why you decided to keep this part of you from Eddie. Well until now.

You thought that you should tell Eddie about your regression in case something were to happen and cause you to regress out of no where that he should know what to do or at least be made aware of what was happening. He didn't necessarily have to do anything to help you but you thought he would appreciate knowing what was going on with you.

Just as you were putting the already popped popcorn in a bowl you heard the door bell ring repeatedly and frantically.

You set the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table and rushed to the door and threw it open and greeted and equally excited Eddie at the door.

"Hey! Look what I got" Eddie said while giving you a hug and entering your house.

You looked at the films he excitedly shoved in front of your face to see he picked Beetlejuice and Friday the thirteenth (look their great movies you guys).

"Of course you picked those" you said shaking your head with faux annoyance and a smile on your face.

"What does that mean?!" Eddie asked spinning to face you after he set the movies down. "These are incredible movies I'll have you know and I don't need your sass to ruin them"

"Oh I'm sure they are. Now pop them in the VHS player so we can watch them. Your whining's giving me a headache." You said dramatically, rubbing your temple.

Eddie just mocked you with a high pitched voice but eventually did what you said. You smiled to yourself. 'This is good', you thought 'Eddie's in a good mood so maybe telling him won't make him too upset....well hopefully' you added to your thoughts.

Eddie then ran up to where you were sitting and slammed himself into your couch. He then cuddled up close to you just as you grabbed the popcorn and brought it up to the couch so the both of you had better access to it. Upon listening to the erie music you realzed he picked Friday the thirteenth. Not the best movie for an already stressed regressor but you'll have to make due.

As the movie went on you were getting very antsy. Either from the movie or the knowledge that you had to tell Eddie about your regression, you couldn't tell. Unfortunately Eddie noticed your constant moving and squirming and called you out on it.

"You doin okay over their babe? You keep moving and you already bumped your boney elbow into my ribs like four times already" he said jokingly but you knew that it had real concern.

'Did you not like the movie? Were you hurt? Was something wrong? Was the movie making you nervous? Was him being so close to you making you nervous?' All of these questions were swimmimg through Eddie's head and making him nervous.

"No! No, no, no, I'm fine! Completely fine. Never been finer actually." You said very with a fake laugh at the end

Eddie looked at you with a "bitch please" look and you knew you were busted.

You had hoped your incredible lying skills would get you out of this situation but the unfortunately let you down. 'How did he know I was lying' you thought to yourself not realizing that a deaf two day old squirrel could somehow lie better than you.

'Well since you've already got his attention might as well get it over with' you finally thought after a few seconds of staring at him hoping that he'd just change the subject but god never wanted you to have it easy apparently.

"Um actually I did want to tell you something....it's been bugging me for a couple of weeks and well um how do I put this...." You trailed off try to find a way for it not to sound weird, not realizing you just made Eddie's blood run cold.

"Are you.....are you brehaking up with mhe?" Eddie asked with a small laugh trying to play it off like he wasn't worried.

But you could see the fear in his eyes. You could see how the thought of you leaving him broke his very soul and so you obviously had to shoot that down.

"What?! God no! No. Never Eddie. Your the best thing that has ever happened to me Eds. I love you so much, please understand that." You told him while grabbing his shoulders and having him fully face you so he could see the sincerity in your eyes.

"Pshhhh I knew that. I was just messing around" he liked, with the sound of relief evident in his voice. "So what were you going to tell me before I EVER so rudely interupted you?" Now promptly crawling on top of you with his hands holding his head up on your stomach, after he pushed you onto your back, and was kicking his feet in back of him.

He was obviously trying to lighten the mood back up and you couldn't have been more thankful for it. You don't think you'd be able to confess to him with the atmosphere being so thick. So finally you built up the courage (again) and told him.

You told him all about your age regression. You first explained to him what it was, seeing the confusion written all over his face. You told him why others use it and how there are different age ranges and you told him your's.

As you were speaking, Eddie slowly began to sit back up, he was trying to understand everything you were telling him with one of his eyebrows raising in deep concentration. You couldn't tell if it was a good thing or a bad thing and you prayed it was the former.

As you finished, you looked into his eyes, having looked away in shame at what you were telling him as if it were some great crime you have had just committed.

After a few seconds of silence Eddie asked; "Sooooo..... What um....what does this mean for us?" He didn't really know what to say.

"Well I mean hopefully we can just.... Ya know...... Go back to normal....." You answered sheepishly "But I completely understand if you don't want to! I know that this is probably not what you wanted and I know you didn't sign up for this but like I think I can hold it in if that makes you feel better. Like maybe if I ever feel myself slipping I could just ya know try to calm myself down and I'll go away from you and and it'll be fine. But like I get if it makes you uncomfortable and if you wanna leave me forever cause I act like a kid and all so don't feel bad or or anything cause that's what I want and-" You start to ramble trying to make Eddie feel better about the giant bomb shell you just dropped on him. And as you do so you can feel yourself slipping.

As your about to go into a little space filled panic attack Eddie interrupts you.

"Wow wow wow! Calm down babe, calm down" Eddie grabs your shoulders and pulls you into a hug and gently rubs your back and head as you start to cry from getting so overwhelmed.

"I'm not breaking up with you, especially over something so little, just like how your not breaking up with me. I couldn't care less is you become littler that you are. When I asked 'what does this mean for us' I meant like if you wanted me to take care of you or something? Now that I'm thinking about it, I probably should have just said that.... Huh....." He said.

(Look he's not the smartest person in the world but he's your boyfriend so now you gotta deal with it)

"So....yous still lobe me?" You asked sheepishly looking up from where you buried your head in his neck.

You had finally slipped into little space at this point.

"To the moon and back little Rockstar" he answered giving you a big fat kiss on your cheek.

He then looked up from the side of your face with and imaginary light bulb flickering on on top of his head.

"Hey! That'll be you new little nickname now! 'Little rockstar'! It's perfect. Well as long as your cool with it" he said looking down at you.

You nodded quickly showing your new found love for your new nickname.

The rest of the night went pretty smoothly. Eddie laid back on his back with you on his stomach and him holding you with you stomach on top of his and his hands cradling you. You didn't mind the movie that was playing seeing how you were too exhausted to even watch it at this point. You fell into a deep sleep now knowing how Eddie fully support you.

Fast forward to a couple days later and Eddie Munson is slamming his fist repeatedly as hard as he can on you door. Thankfully your parents aren't home (because this is a fanfic and they never seem to live in the same house as you unless it's to sell you to one direction or something but I digress) so you wip the door open to reveal a slight out of breath and incredibly sweaty Eddie with a few bags in his hands.

"Greetings my beloved! I have returned to your humble abode baring gifts!" He said and if it weren't for the fact that he was the love of your life, you would have slammed the door in his face for being so cringy.

Fortunately for him, you loved him so much, so you just rolled your eyes with a smile on your face and let him in. He did a little bow, thanking you, and entered you home.

"Not only did I bring a disgusting amount of treats like candy and cookies and what not. But I also got you this!" He exclaimed.

Pulled from the bag was an adorable black bat plushy. It had big ears and giant eyes with it wings open as if it were flying. It was smiling at you and had little bits of glitter on it representing the night sky with the glitter as stars.

Seeing this you were instantly bitch slapped into little space.

"For me?" You asked hopefully pointing at yourself. Because obviously he bought it for the OTHER person in your house.

"Yes sweet heart, it's for you" Eddie answered you, placing the plushy in you hands.

You started at it for a moment and then ran into Eddie, almost running him over, and gave him a big ole bear hug.

"I lobe it! I lobe it! I lobe it! Thank yous, thank yous, thank yous!" You yelled excitedly.

"Y-your welcome" Eddie wheezed, slowly loosing oxygen and you squeezed it out of him.

"So!" Said Eddie after you finally released him from your death grip "what's there name gonna be?"

You thought for a couple seconds before looking at him with a grin on your face.

"Midnigh" you answered confidently.

"Midnight huh?" Eddie asked pulling you onto the couch to lay with him after he got out some cookies and started feeding them to you.

"Mmhm" you said mouth full of cookie.

"Well I think that's a great name little Rockstar." Eddie said finally with a content smile on his face.

The End

Okay so I have a some reasons why I haven't written in a while to which I shall answer good news bad news style but some of it is kinda gross soooo

TRIGGER WARNING

Good news: I completed a fic and have a few more requested to keep them coming out. Bad news: my wisdom teeth are FINALLY coming in. Good news: none of my teeth hurt. Bad news: where one of my bottom wisdom tooth was coming the gum that was over it I guess got infected and started to inflame and got so big to the point where I couldn't close my mouth properly. Good news: it's gone! Bad news: it popped in my mouth leaving a disgusting tastes and stained my side of my tounge where it was yellow and was very painful after and I could eat on that side of my mouth. Good news: after that I went to six flags with my dad, brother, and younger cousin. Bad news: it was 98 degrees out and the feel was I think 103. Good news: because of the heat almost no one was there and we got to go on rides with little wait time. Bad news: we were out their for about 5 hours and I got sun sick with a bad headache and the feeling of needing to throw up. Good news: I was fine the next day and still am now. Bad news: my anxiety is acting up for very dumb reasons and it's killing my motivation. Good news: y'all's support makes me want to keep writing so that's what I'm gonna try and do. Bad news: my hands are now cramping from writing for so long.

And that's about it. I wish I were making this shit up but unfortunately I'm fucking not and was suffering a lot but other than that I'm fine I guess. Okay that's all, expect some new fics soon if everything goes right. Byyyyyyye

[seventeensbabye]

《ᴘᴀʀᴛ ᴛᴡᴏ》

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✧ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ/ɴᴏᴛᴇs: ᴋɪssɪɴɢ, ᴘᴇᴛ ɴᴀᴍᴇ, ᴄᴜʀsɪɴɢ, ғʟɪʀᴛɪɴɢ, ᴘʜʏsɪᴄᴀʟ ᴛᴏᴜᴄʜ. (ɴᴏᴛ ᴘʀᴏᴏғ ʀᴇᴀᴅ!)

✧ sᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ɪɴ ᴀ ʙᴜsɪɴᴇss ᴄʟᴀss ɪɴ ᴡʜɪᴄʜ ʏᴏᴜ sᴛʀᴜɢɢʟᴇ ɪɴ, ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴀᴄʜᴇʀ ɪɴᴛʀᴏᴅᴜᴄᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴏ ᴀ ʙᴏʏ ɴᴀᴍᴇᴅ ʜᴇᴇsᴇᴜɴɢ ᴡʜᴏ ᴡᴀs sᴜᴘᴘᴏsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴛᴜᴛᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ ʙᴜᴛ ᴛᴜᴛᴏʀɪɴɢ ᴛᴜʀɴᴇᴅ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴡᴀʏ ᴍᴏʀᴇ ᴛʜᴀɴ ᴛʜᴀᴛ.

✧ ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 1.2ᴋ

✧ ɢᴇʀɴᴇ: ғʟᴜғғ & ʜɪɢʜsᴄʜᴏᴏʟ!ᴀᴜ

✧ ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: ʟᴇᴇ ʜᴇᴇsᴇᴜɴɢ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ (ғᴇᴍ)

✧ ᴍ.ʟɪsᴛ

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its now 6:22 am and i just woke up. having school at 7:25 is so crazy to me because why is it so early? i pout as i get up to get ready. walking to the bathroom to turn on the shower, walking back to my closet to pick out nothing but the school uniform and a pair of thigh high stockings. i set my clothes on my bed, grabbing my towel, walking back to the bathroom, closing the door behind me. i take off my clothes and step in the shower quickly washing up and washing my hair. i turn off the shower and get out, wrapping myself in a towel before finishing my morning routine. brushing my teeth, washing my face, fixing my hair, and doing my makeup. after that was done i went out to my room and got dressed.

grabbing my backpack, phone, female essentials, and my water bottle after i’m finished getting dressed then heading downstairs. “ goodmorning y/n, i’ve made breakfast. ” my mom says making me a light breakfast. fruits, eggs, and bacon. i set my bottle down and put my essentials in my bag then sit down. i sit down and quickly eat so i can make it to school on time. after i’m done i fill up my water bottle, fill it up, rush to the door putting on my shoes, and rush out the door hoping i make it to the bus stop on time. as i made it to the bus stop i seen the bus pulling up. i catch my breath and wait for the bus to stop so i can get on. i found an empty seat and sat down, while the bus drove to school. i made it ten minutes earlier then i expected and waited in my first class until class started.

i haven’t seen lee heeseung as the day went on kinda forgetting about him. it gets down to the last class that ends at 3:30 which is my business class and as i walk in i bump into mr. lee. “ sorry.. ” i said sounding so apologetic. “ its okay y/n, you don’t need to apologize. we didn’t see each other thats all. ” every-time he talks he talks with such a gentle and mannered tone. i then nod walking to my seat then sitting down. mr. lee of course came and sat directly next to me taking someone else’s seat but no one would dare speak to him seeing he’s like one of the most popular and top students of this school. while the teacher spoke starting up class i felt as heeseung just stared at me. smile still on his face but it was a very light smile. trying not to make it so awkward i looked over to him and kindly smiled then looked back over to the teacher.

“ okay class so today we’ll be learning about the 5 step marketing research process. ” me having to actually learn this shit irl as a sophomore was crazy. i sighed knowing this was gonna be a long class. “ this is also what will be helpful for your final so pay attention. ” we wrote down notes for half of the class. heeseung being the fast writer that he is he finished writing down the notes before anyone. well i didn’t know that because he was still writing something down. it was a note, to me saying, “ i’m gonna tutor you at 4. ” nodding passing back the note he writes something else down.

“ i know you heard about the party this saturday, i’m going and i would like for you to come with me. just tell your parents we have a tutoring session and come to my house a little early, bring your clothes in your bag or something. ” i read the note feeling anxious because i’ve never been to a party before. well at least a high school party. “ but mr. lee i didn’t know you went to parties. plus idk.. i’ve never really been to a high school party. ” after writing i pass it back to him and he looks at me shocked. “ everyone chosoe a partner to work with and send one person up here to get your assignment! ” miss jeon said loudly. people walked up to me, wanting to be my partner but heeseung grabbed my hand giving everyone a hint that i was his partner.

he told me to go up there and grab the assignment which i did. i walked back to my seat and handed him a worksheet. “ for this assignment pull out your computers and follow the instructions that you see listed at the top of the page. ” doing so heeseung moves closer to me and whispers in my ear, “ so you’ve really never been to a party? i go to them almost all the time. ” i shook my head telling him no. “ well you’re most definitely coming with me to this one. no excuses. ” i took a deep breath and said okay even though i had no experience making me not wanna go. we worked on the assignment for the rest of the class until class was over. once it ended i packed up my stuff. “ we’re gonna walk to the library together. ” again a nod was my response, i waited for him as he packed his bag and got up, walking towards the door as i followed. the whole time i followed behind him while we walked to the library.

we walked in and luckily seen a two person desk by the window which is where we sat. we made conversation more than we studied but me and heeseung had no problem with that. the conversation was amazing, we just talked about life and school for the most part. it then got a little quiet not a weird awkward type quiet though. “ you know mr. lee.. ” he looked up at me. “ when i said you have to call me mr. lee i was joking, you can call me heeseung. ” he laughed a little. i smiled. “ thank you for being my tutor, it takes a lot of stress off my chest. ” he looked me in the eyes. “ don’t thank me, it was my choice to help you. i just didn’t like to see you struggling in class. ” we then decided it was time to go so we packed up and he took me home.

walking me to my door, before i could walk in he stopped me. “ thank you for bringing me home and i hope you make it home safely. ” i said with the softest and sweetest tone. he nodded smiling. before i was allowed to walk in, he grabbed me by my waist pulling me closer to him. i started to get butterflies. “ what are you doing mr- ” and before i can finish my sentence he pulled me in for a kiss, holding me tightly. still feeling as it was a little too early all i could say was that his soft lips pressed against mines felt like heaven. he pulled away kissing my head. “ goodnight pretty girl, get some rest and i’ll see you tomorrow. ” he put one of his hands in his pocket and stepped back waving at me with a smile. i waved back saying goodnight as i walked inside closing the door behind me. i watched as he walked home so elegantly. feeling weak in my legs.

“ bye heeseung, i’ll see you tomorrow. ”

ᴇɴᴅ.@seventeensbabye

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© seventeensbabye: all rights reserved. Reposting/modifying of any fic, or pieces of original writings posted on this blog is not allowed. Translations not allowed.  

[xiaojusaur]

7 Minutes in Heaven

Pairing: Friends to Lovers! Hendery x Reader

Genre: Fluff, Angst, Smut, Comedy

Warnings: car sex, fingering, squirting, dirty talking, multiple orgasms, mentions of masturbation, mentions of alcohol consumption.

Word Count: 6K

Description: Hendery was the new guy in class who didn’t know how to talk English well, that’s how you first start talking and then became good friends. You had a crush on him, but he didn’t know. Everything changed at a frat party; you shouldn’t have played 7 minutes in heaven with your friend.

You were accustomed to arrive early to the classroom because there was a certain desk you liked, plus you didn’t like being either too close or too far to the professor. Sometimes you really didn’t feel like paying attention, and today was one of those days.

On the way, you met with your best friend, but you couldn’t enroll in the same classes this semester, so she had to leave quickly.

When you got to the classroom, there was a new face and he was sitting on your favorite place. The shock froze you in place, he hadn’t noticed you were there as he was writing something down on his notebook and his dark mane was covering his face.

You decided to be nice and just sit on the desk on his left. When he was aware of your presence, he turned his head to you, your eyes meeting when you raised your glance. You smiled and he smiled back. He was cute. You both kept quiet until the rest of the classmates and the professor arrived.

“Class! We have a new student with us! Hendery, please say hello!” Your professor introduced the new guy to your right. He waved shyly. “Please be patient with him, he doesn’t know much English. He came all the way from Macau. If you guys see him struggling, please give him a hand,” your professor continued.

So that’s why he was so silent! He seemed so nice and you having a lot of empathy, could feel he was feeling anxious. It must’ve been hard not being able to communicate well.

The class continued and you were distracted with the fact that maybe Hendery couldn’t understand well what was being discussed. He looked so focused, you didn’t dare to interrupt him because maybe he was trying to do his best. So you waited for the class to be over and when he was about to leave, you stopped him.

“Hey, wait a minute!” You whisper-shouted.

He turned around and his face seemed to light up.

“Are you okay? Did you understand the class?” You asked him.

“Yeah, I tried my best,” he shrugged and then giggled.

You giggled with him and then said, “If you ever need help to understand something, just ask me, okay?”

“Alright! Thank you!” He seemed genuinely happy that you were willing to help him.

“Do you know anyone around?” you didn’t want him to be alone.

“Yeah, I have a friend. I will meet him now to get lunch,” he explained.

“That’s good!” You nodded.

“Do you want to join us?” He asked you.

“That’s alright! I’ll meet with my best friend too,” you answered.

“Oh okay, see you later then,” he was about to leave when he remembered he didn’t know your name. “Oh! Wait! What’s your name?”

“Y/N,” you smiled to him one last time before he nodded and left.

The months went on like that. Hendery occasionally came for help, he liked teaming up with your for group projects, and he even invited you to lunch a few times. You liked spending time together and slowly, he merged into your group of friends, bringing his group of friends also.

His English got better and better, he was almost and expert, even though he had a cute accent.

You found yourself having a huge crush on him, but you swore you would never tell him. For you, he was way out of your league, you weren’t his type, and you didn’t even know about his language, though he had tried several times to teach you some words and expressions.

“Hey!” He arrived to your apartment without notice to find you curled up in your sofa watching a movie.

“Hi! What’s up?” You said while checking your phone to see if he had texted you, finding an empty screen.

“So, tonight’s there’s this frat party from the frat house Yangyang is in, do you maybe wanna go?” He then smiled widely, trying to convince you.

“I don’t know... I’m not in the mood for partying today,” you replied while cuddling the cushion.

“Come onnn!” He flopped by your side on the couch, “Lyndsey is gonna be there! She’s gonna stalk me the whole night!” He groaned.

“Well, that’s your own fault! You dicked her down and she got addicted,” you shrugged, laughing at him later.

“Hey! I was in need!” He explained unnecessarily.

“You guys can’t last a week without pussy, that’s sad, you know,” you were mocking him.

“It’s in our nature, what can we do? Plus, how long has it been since you got laid?” He was smirking, trying to make fun of you.

“Shut up,” you pushed him playfully.

“So come on!!!! Let’s go to the frat party!” He started shaking you by the arm.

“Alright! Alright! Ugh! You’re so annoying!” You jumped to your feet and went to your room to change, your quick choice being a pair of jeans, a turtleneck shirt, a bomber college jacket, and some sneakers. You texted your best friend.

Hey! Are you going to that frat party?

Idk... are you?

Dery is making me go. Something about Lyndsey and stuff

Sucks. I can accompany you

Please! It’s possible he finds someone else and leaves me alone there surrounded by strangers

Fine, I’ll throw something on and see you there.

You got out of your room and Hendery was there, laying back on the couch while watching the TV. He looked so cute. You couldn’t believe you had a crush on him and he hadn’t noticed.

“We’re ready to go,” you announced and he looked at you from head to toe and back up. He catcalled you as a joke, “Look at my bestie gooo! She’s gonna seduce some men!”

You rolled your eyes and said, “Let’s go before I change my mind.”

“Fine, let’s go!”

At the party, you met with your best friend while Hendery went with his friends. Everyone was wilding, playing beer pong, dancing, drinking, making out on the corners.

You stayed by your friend’s side, dancing and drinking. Hendery found you in the crowd and started dancing with you too, after all, you were that comfortable with each other. He grabbed your hips and was grinding on you while you followed his hips. When the song finished he said he was gonna get more alcohol while you ran to your best friend again.

“Are you not gonna tell him ever?” She asked you, talking about your huge crush in Hendery.

“I don’t think I will. I mean, we’re okay as we are,” you shrugged. You didn’t want to lose his friendship and you thought that if you told him, everything would turn awkward, so you just decided to keep it to yourself.

As the night went by, people started to get sleepy, some passing out on the couches, others disappeared who knows where. Only a few were still alive and among them were Hendery, your friend, the infamous Lyndsey, and you. Someone had the bright idea of playing 7 minutes in heaven just for the sake of relieving high school memories, so you all sat on the floor in circle. Some random guy looked for an empty bottle that would choose the lucky couples. You were sitting across Hendery, who looked spaced out, probably drunk already and being stalked by Lyndsey. The poor girl’s eyes were shining with high hopes of getting a chance to be alone with Dery again. You were mocking him and he was acting annoyed.

As the game progressed, many random couples got to be locked in the darkness of the closet. Your friend matched with the very hot Jaehyun guy from English class but she didn’t spill anything. While you were teasing her, you heard Hendery’s name along with some noise by his friends. You were about to start mocking him too when you noticed the bottle was pointing at you.

You swear your surroundings froze in time. Your friend’s eyes widened because she knew how you felt. Hendery tho, was excited because after all, it was you and he wouldn’t feel so awkward.

“Aren’t you going?” Said the guy who had the control of spinning the bottle, Lyndsey looked at you and then to Hendery, expecting you to not go. Hendery actually helped you to stand up and basically dragged you into the closet with him. Before locking the door, the guy with the timer said, “Whatever you do, you have 7 minutes. Nothing more,” and with that, he left you two alone in the darkness of the closet.

You were holding into Hendery’s arms, maybe to know he was there, maybe as a support, or perhaps because you wanted to feel him close.

“Well, at least I’m saved from Lyndsey,” he laughed nervously.

“Yup, once again, I am your savior,” you remarked.

Being alone with Hendery wasn’t awkward usually, but there was some weird tension going on in the tiny space of the closet.

“What should we do?” He asked in a whisper, the air emitting from his lips blowing you right on the face because he was too close.

“I don’t know... talk? We’re friends, this isn’t weird,” you tried to convince yourself.

“I mean... yeah...”

“These had been the longest seven minutes of my life,” you stated.

“Let’s kiss, maybe that would make it less awkward and the time will go faster,” Hendery suggested and you swear the butterflies in your stomach made a tornado.

“You think kissing between friends is less awkward?” You asked confused.

“Well yeah, I mean, we’re friends. It shouldn’t be weird, it’s only a kiss,” he said, ignorant of your feelings for him.

“Okay then,” you agreed, “but let’s not allow this to make us awkward after, alright?”

“Promise,” he gave you his pinky to hook with yours.

In less than a second, his lips crashed on yours. You thought it was just gonna be a peck, but then he started moving his lips, and automatically, yours responded. His tongue darted between your lips, looking for yours to tangle with. Your arms snaked around his neck, while his wrapped around your waist, bringing you even more closer. Having him like this sparked the feeling inside you more: you were in love with this guy without remedy.

When you two were getting comfortable with it, you heard the alarm outside, indicating time was up. You detangled from each other, fixing your hair and your clothes to make it seem that nothing had happened. Everyone knew you two were best friends and to give the tiniest hint that you had done anything in there would be enough for your group of friends to start teasing you. When the door opened, you went on with your normal friendship and acted as if you haven’t kissed passionately a few minutes ago.

You were too overwhelmed, so you decided to leave with your friend. Hendery stayed. He was probably gonna crash in with the boys.

On the way back, your friend was telling you about her experience with Jaehyun, and then she remembered your time with Hendery.

“Did anything happen in there? You two looked pretty normal to me,” she inquired.

“Well... we kissed,” you shrugged.

“I knew it -wait what?!” She was shocked! “You kissed? As in a peck or-?”

“As in full tongue,” you nodded.

“Oh my God...... how do you feel?” She was concerned now.

“Like I’m in love... I feel like as soon as his lips touched mine, I was done, I completely fell in love with him,” you confessed.

“Oh no.... what you gonna do now?” She asked.

“Try to not be awkward and act as if it was nothing. Friends can kiss right?” You fake-smiled.

“No they cannot! Friends with benefits do... but I don’t think you’re there yet,” she scratched her neck.

“I’m fucked aren’t I?”

“Very...”

You tried avoiding Hendery until you felt better and collected your thoughts, but that was kinda impossible since he was everywhere and he looked for you everyday. So you did your best to not looked like you were having a turmoil of feelings every time you saw his stupid, beautiful face.

There you were, having lunch all together. He was talking about how he wanted to talk to a cute girl who was a few tables away. Your friend placed her hand on top of yours in silent support.

Honestly, you didn’t know what was up with you. He usually talked to you about his affairs with other females and you weren’t this affected, but today you were bothered by it. While his friends celebrated that he was going to get her number, you stood up and left with the excuse of having to study because of a test. Your friend followed you.

“I think you need to talk to him,” she suggested.

“I don’t know. I feel is going to be useless,” you grunted.

“Y/N, it has gotten to a point where you’re always fuming. He will start noticing your behavior soon if you keep this up, so my advice is that you two sit down and talk this out,” she stepped in front of you.

“There’s nothing to talk about! He doesn’t feel the same way I do. I’m the one trying to ruin our friendship,” you said as you threw your hands in the air in frustration.

“First of all, you don’t know that. Second of all, if you keep bottling it, you’re gonna explode and it’s going to be worse. And that’s not ruining a friendship, it’s only natural you like him. You spend time together, he knows you well, he brings you snacks...” Your friend was trying to talk reason back to you.

You whined, “But how am I supposed to tell him? I can’t just sit him down and tell him, ‘Listen, I have this huge crush on you, please love me back’, he’s a guy, he won’t understand.”

“Well, if he feels the same way he WILL understand,” she said matter-of-factly.

“That isn’t helping! Ughhh! I need to plan something... something that looks casual but it’s the right moment, you know what I mean?”

“How about... how about you invite him to watch a movie? That’s something you guys do often, right?” She suggested and you nodded. “You watch a movie, you have your snacks, you cuddle as you always do, and then you tell him. What do you think?” She wiggled her eyebrows and you laughed.

You gasped, “How do you know we cuddle? Are you spying on me?!”

“Come on, let’s be realistic. You two look like cuddly people,” she rolled her eyes.

“Yeah true... your plan sounds good. Imma try it. You’re the best! I don’t know how my life would be without you,” you embraced your friend in gratitude.

At night, you texted Hendery to start with your plan:

Hey, dumbhead

Sup, headache

Do you have plans on Friday night?

Not yet, 为什么？(weishenme - Why)

Why are you texting me in Chinese?! You know I don’t understand! I mean, I’m deducing that means why.

🤪🤪🤪

Anyways! What do you think if we watch that new movie on Netflix?

Sure, I’ll bring snacks

Kay

好！

Now that you had everything planned, you started thinking about what to say and how to say it. You couldn’t just shoot it.

A few hours later, when you were about to go to sleep, you received another text from Hendery. It said it had an image attached. It was strange but you decided to open it. And then regretted it.

Hendery had sent you a spicy picture. It wasn’t a nude but it was pretty suggestive. He was holding his member over his pants, as if to show how big he is without actually showing. Almost a dick pic.

You panicked, you were sure that wasn’t for you. A sudden jealousy took over you because, why was he sending these pics to someone else? But also, your friend-self told you to keep calm and let him know.

Wrong number! Dumbass! Look at the number before sending these kind of things!

He didn’t answer for a while, but then he appeared

I’m sorry!!! Oh God! I’m so embarrassed!

It’s all good. At least you’re not showing anything. My eyes aren’t bleeding yet!

I’m really sorry!

It’s okay! We’re friends...

And you left him with that.

Friday arrived and you were nervous already, waiting for Hendery in your apartment. Around 8PM he knocked on your door and you yelled “Come in!” Too lazy to get up from the couch. He looked comfy but so sexy at the same time.

Hendery brought a lot of snacks and placed them on the low table.

“I brought your favorites and mines, to fix your day!” He said excitedly.

You smiled and replied, “Thanks! I really appreciate it.”

“Let’s get to it!” He yelled and you shushed him laughing, he was so noisy and your neighbors would complain.

You were cuddled up with each other while watching the movie. You were leaning on his chest while he played with your hair with one hand and ate popcorn with the other. You felt his eyes on you, so you looked up and your eyes met. He smiled to you and you smiled back. You didn’t know if it was your imagination but you felt he was getting closer to your mouth. In your panic you didn’t move and opted to let it happen, maybe this was a sign that he liked you back. But then, his lips never touched yours and only centimeters away he said, “Haha, gotcha,” with a groggy voice.

You got angry and couldn’t conceal it anymore. So you got off the couch as quickly as possible.

“What’s wrong?” He asked confused.

The ticking bomb inside you snapped.

“What’s wrong?! You dare to ask me what’s wrong?! Hendery! You just pretended you were going to kiss me and then told me it was a joke!”

“Hey! Calm down! I thought it would be funny! Since you know, we kissed in the game as a joke” His eyes widening in concern.

“So the kiss was a joke to you?” You said crossing your arms tightly.

“I thought it was just a game, it didn’t mean anything,” he explained.

“It did to me!” You blurted, your mouth talking before you could think straight.

He froze and gulped, “What?”

“Nothing,” you turned around and walked to the kitchen.

“Y/N!” He walked behind you, “talk to me! You’re acting really strange lately. You’ve been avoiding me, you get angry about everything... what is wrong? What changed?”

You leaned on the counter, trying to find the correct words. “What changed is...” you gulped and then continued, “My feelings for you, Hendery. That changed.”

He was so puzzled. “I don’t understand...”

“Hendery, I’m in love with you,” you confessed, feeling a relief within you.

You looked at him, his eyes were alarmed, not quite the reaction you were expecting. “I- I- I don’t know what to say...” he stuttered.

“You don’t have to say anything, Hendery...” you muttered.

“I- I’ll be right back...” he walked slowly to the door and left without his things. He didn’t come back.

“Great Y/N, great! You just ruined your friendship,” you said to yourself, running your hands through your hair.

You cleaned your apartment and curled up in your bed, regretting everything you just did.

You two didn’t talk for a week straight, not daring to approach each other. Hendery went to Xiaojun for help because he felt he was losing you and he didn’t want that, but he felt bad for leaving you hanging that night. You were expecting an answer from him, but at that time, he didn’t think you were going to say what you said.

“This is simple, Hendery,” said Xiaojun while cooking something. “How do you feel about her?”

“I don’t know!!!” He whined, pulling his long strands of hair.

“I think you do know, you just don’t want to accept it,” Xiaojun chuckled. “You can be honest with me, you know.”

“Ughhh! Okay,” Hendery groaned. “I think I’m pretty accustomed to her as my best friend that I didn’t think I could actually like her. But now thinking about it well, I feel like my best self when I’m around her. I can be myself and she won’t judge me, she follows my weird behavior, she shares snacks with me...”

“Let me change the question a little bit,” Xiaojun interrupted, “the day of the party, how did you feel when you kissed?”

After thinking about it a little, Hendery answered, “I wanted to keep kissing her. I felt so comfortable in her arms. She’s a great kisser btw,” he drifted away.

“Focus!” Xiaojun yelled.

“Okay, okay! I don’t know, I feel like I would be able to tell if I see her again... but I don’t know how to go back to her,” he sighed.

“How about you do a non-date date, something simple like going for a late night drive,” Xiaojun suggested.

“You’re a genius!” Hendery exclaimed.

“I’m a romantic, which is different,” he pointed out.

It was 12AM on a Friday and you we’re already cuddled in your bed when there was a knock on your door. You threw a hoodie on, to not wear a bra just in case, and went to see who was it.

You felt like the air was punched out of you when you opened the door and saw Hendery’s figure. His hair was disheveled and he was wearing a cream-colored shirt, black joggers, and his glasses: the best look on him. “Hendery...” you said softly.

“Um... hi!” He smiled awkwardly, making him look so cute to you. “Listen, I know we haven’t talked this whole week and I didn’t have the best response to what you said and I’m sorry about that,” he was talking too fast.

“Hey... it’s okay,” you patted him on the arm. “You want to come in?”

“Actually, I came here for you. Do you want to go for a late night drive?” He was swinging, looking pretty nervous.

You sighed, “Do I have to change?”

“Not really, I mean, look at me,” he extended his arms and turned around. You giggled.

“Fine, let me get my shoes,” you ran to your room and put on the first sneakers you found and you both got in his car.

He was just driving around town, both of you being the old friends you were, singing loudly to the songs on the radio, laughing out loud, and watching the neon lights of the places that were open. He got down on a station to buy snacks for both and then kept going.

You ended up on a lonely hill with a view to the city lights. Sitting on the front of his car, you listened to Hendery talked about his life in Macau and what he missed. Then you were playing, trying to guess where were the places among the tiny lights at sight. Like magnets, you cuddled against each other without noticing; the night was getting cold after all. In the chit-chat, the clock marked 3AM. You got in the car again but Hendery didn’t started the car, instead he talked.

“Y/N... I’ve been thinking about what you told me.” There was a long silence between you two, so he continued, “I like the version of me when I’m with you. It’s so easy to not think about what to do or what to say, I can just speak my mind. I really appreciate you.”

“Same here, Dery,” you placed your hand on top of his, which was on his thigh.

“Im sorry for making you feel bad. I really didn’t think straight, I was in utter shock,” he apologized.

“It’s okay, I shouldn’t have said that the way I did,” you accepted.

“So no hard feelings?” He asked, looking at you now.

“No hard feelings,” you smiled.

But then the air changed between you two. A force was drawing you together and neither of you stopped it. Your lips touched, sparking the flame inside you again. And like that, Hendery knew he loved you too, because the butterflies in his stomach wouldn’t stop dancing. His hand traveled to the back of your head, holding you softly. He pulled back first, mumbling, “I’m sorry, is this okay?”

“Only if it’s okay with you,” you whispered.

“I love you,” he muttered before kissing you again, this time deepening the kiss. Your arms quickly wrapped around his neck, bringing him closer. It turned to a passionate make out session and you were gasping for air. You smiled because you were kissing your best friend and Hendery smiled because you looked so cute.

“Should we take this to the backseat?” He suggested with a groggy voice.

“Here? Right now? Really?” You joked.

“I’m sorry! I’m desperate for you,” he shrugged. He jumped first, to lean the seat back for more space. Conveniently he had some sheets there. Then he beckoned you with his hands, inviting you to jump with him. You did as told but your foot got stuck on the front seat so you landed flat over him. You both started laughing at your disgrace but then started kissing wildly again.

He rolled over so you were under him. He fitted perfectly between your legs, as if you were made for him. Quickly, clothes started to be bothersome and he took off your hoodie. Then, Hendery’s hands ran underneath your shirt, reaching your breasts. He squeezed them and then started playing with your hardened nipples, rolling them between his fingers. Soon enough, he asked you, “Can I take this off?” Pulling your shirt. You simply responded, “Please.” He also took off his, revealing his beautiful body and threw both of your shirts to the front seat. One of his hands ran down your body, feeling all of you while he enjoyed your lips. You sighed in satisfaction, feeling yourself getting wetter with every touch and each kiss.

Hendery knew when to start touching you and he asked for your consent, “Can I touch you?”

“Please Dery, I’m so wet already,” you said in a needy whisper.

He groaned in response, his fingers not loosing time in snaking inside your shorts. First he touched you over your underwear and then he slipped inside your panties, finding your clit easily. “Oh my god,” you said in a breathy murmur.

“Fuck... you’re so wet,” he hissed. He took out his hand to pull down your pants and underwear, all in one go, helping you shimmy out of them. After all, none of this was being awkward between you, you felt comfortable with each other. Once he had you all at his mercy, he kissed your neck, his mouth going down and down while his hand went to your south. His lips enclosed your nipple at the same time his fingers got between your folds. God! He was so skilled! Your hand played with his hair while his did unholy thing to you.

He sticked his middle finger in you, going in and out, then he added his ring finger and started moving them fast and deep inside, making you whine. “Fuuuuck! Dery! Feels so good!”

He let go of your nipple with a pop, “You like my fingers, baby? Yeah?” His voice was lower than usual and breathier, it had your head spinning.

“Ooh! Yeah, I love them,” you cried and kissed him. You could hear the squelching sound coming from between your legs. You couldn’t believe Hendery was the one making a mess of you.

You felt your orgasm bubbling inside you, “Hendery I’m gonna cum,” you said in a high-pitched whimper.

“You wanna cum on my fingers? Do you like them that much?” He panted.

“Mmmm! Yes!” You moaned.

“Come on, baby, let go,” he commanded you and started thrusting his fingers faster.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” you said in a shattered chant and then you felt the delicious tingles all over your body, your eyes rolled back, and your back arched. Something unusual happened this time: strands of water gushed out of you and your legs started to shake. You cried loudly loosing all control of your body. Hendery was amazed of what he just did, “Shit! So hot!”

You, on the other hand, were embarrassed. “Oh god... I’m so sorry...” you hid on the crook of his neck.

“It’s okay, that was so hot! I’ve never achieved that. Did you know you could do that?” He caressed your hair in assurance.

“No... it’s the first time that happens...” you whined in embarrassment.

“Baby, it’s okay,” he chuckled, “wanna know something? I’m harder now.”

“Deryyy!” You gasped.

“Can you take it?” He hummed.

“I can take all of you,” you smirked.

“So naughty, I like it,” he pecked your lips and proceeded to kneel in front of you, all bended to avoid smashing his head with the hood. He slipped his pants off easily, along with his briefs, his hardened cock springing free. Your mouth watered at the sight, the tip so pink, shinning with wetness, all ready to take you.

You opened your legs, inviting him, you couldn’t wait for him to be inside you.

He hissed when seeing your still wet core, “Fuck, I could’ve beat that long time ago,” to which you laughed. “Well, you decided to keep boundaries.”

“You’re my best friend, wasn’t it going to be weird?” He raised an eyebrow.

“Maybe?” You shrugged.

“I’m a man, you know. I’m weak. Do you think I didn’t wish to rearrange your insides some of those nights where we cuddled in your couch? It took the best of me to calm this little guy,” he grabbed his length. You burst out laughing.

“Are we really having this conversation when you’re about to wreck me?” You rolled your eyes.

“You started it!” He complaint.

“Oh, shut up and fuck me,” you taunted.

“Condom or no condom?” He asked.

“Wrap your weiner, I don’t know where you have sticked that thing in,” you commanded him.

“I’m clean! I always protect myself, who do you take me for?! I offered myself since I trust you as my best friend, but okay. And don’t call him a thing! He has a name!” he sounded so offended.

“Oh my god! Don’t take it personal! Maybe in the future I’ll let you fuck me raw,” you winked, “but for now, let’s do it this way.”

“Alright,” he said as he looked for his wallet in the pocket of the pants he just discarded. Finding the tiny foil square was fast and he was even faster rolling it down his shaft.

“Come here,” he pulled you closer by your legs, making you laugh. This whole adventure had been a fun ride for both of you.

He kissed you passionately again, one of his hands ran to your leg, bending it a little to have better access to your entrance. He then hold his length, rubbing the tip up and down your pussy, teasing you, making you bite your lip. You were shaking in anticipation.

He pushed himself in slowly, both of you moaning. “Mmm, 操! (cào - Fuck), you’re so tight for me, baby,” his said in a shaky whisper.

He went as deep as he could, making you feel so full. “Hendery,” you breathed, “I feel so full.”

“Yes baby, I’m gonna make you feel so good,” he assured you in hoarse groan.

He kept thrusting you slowly, passionately, enjoying every inch of you. The car was full of shaky breaths, low moans, occasional grunts, and the sound of kisses. Never in your life you thought you would share such an intimate moment with Hendery, but you were loving every second of it.

“Can I go faster?” He asked softly.

“Yes please,” you pleaded.

Hendery caged you in his arms and started snapping his hips faster. His lips whispered filthy praises in your ear, adding up to your want for him, “So good, your cunt feels so warm baby, wanna fill you up with my cum. Do you want that? Yeah? Mmmm... Making love to you feels so nice. I love you, I love you, I love you. This is the only pussy I wanna fuck for the rest of my life.”

Your hands hugged him back, running all his back, tangling in his hair, he had you crazy for him with every word. If you weren’t out of breath, you replied to his words with moans and mewls. “Mmmf! Hendery! Fuck! I love you so fucking much! Please keep fucking me, it feels so good!”

A few minutes later he panted, “I’m gonna cum.” He tried to go faster and he drove his hand south, finding your bundle of nerves skillfully. He was drawing circles while pummeling into you fast, making your second orgasm arrive with force, tightening around him. A sharp scream left your throat and you hugged him tightly. Hendery came with a guttural growl, “Ughhh! So good!” You could feel him pumping in you while he filled the condom.

When you both could breathe again, he embraced you and peppered you with kisses, making you giggle. “How are you feeling, my love?” He smiled.

“I like the sound of that coming from your lips,” you cuddled with him. He sighed, satisfied with the thought that you were his and he was yours.

“Then I will call you that all day just to see you happy,” he kissed you on the forehead.

“You’re my happiness,” you purred.

“I love you, I really do,” he confessed.

“I love you too, Dery,” you raised your head to kiss his lips.

“Do I need to pop the question or are we clear?” He joked.

“Imma torture you and make it pop it,” you chuckled beaten.

“Would you be my girlfriend?” He asked confidently.

“I’d love to,” you replied.

After a moment of silence, Hendery suggested, “Up for round two?”

“Oh my god, you’ll be the death of me if your sex drive is this high,” you sighed.

“My sex drive with you will always be high. Imagine having to hide your boner for so many years and then finally getting the pussy of your dreams?” He was such a character.

“Stop!! That is not true” you shoved him with your elbow.

“Not true?! Do you wanna know how many times I masturbated after arriving home from our movie nights?!” He could be brutally honest sometimes.

“You masturbate?” You wanted to see him snap.

“Listen, Y/N, if I didn’t, my dick would’ve fallen off by now because holy fuck! I wanted to rail you so bad!”

You just exploded in laughs. He really was the man you loved.

“How many rounds can you make?” You asked him.

“I have a whole box of condoms to use with you. You decide,” he shrugged.

“So that’s 3?” You jeered.

“Very funny,” he said sarcastically.

The car kept rocking, the windows were fogged and Hendery almost could last till dawn making love to you. The rest of the night became an orgasm feast for you two.

You fell asleep, beaten thanks to the activities. When you woke up, the sky was painted in pastel colors, announcing dawn. You were wrapped under the sheets, naked with Hendery, on the back of his car.

You looked at him, he looked so cute sleeping soundlessly, you didn’t want to wake him up, but the sun was about to rise and you were away from the city.

“Baby,” you whispered softly.

“Hmm?” He hummed, as if asking what was wrong.

“Baby, I’m cold and the sun is rising,” you explained.

“Mmm... really?” His sleepy voice was making your head spin.

“Yes my love, we should go home. We can continue sleeping at my apartment if you want,” you suggested.

He yawned, “but then I’ll have to make love to you again because I want to be like this with you.”

You giggled, he was so cute talking while sleepy. You kissed his cheek. “We can just get naked and sleep.”

“It’s not the same,” he groaned. Hendery sat and stretched, then, he passed you your clothes.

You guys bought breakfast on the way home, you ate it and then went back to sleep. You spent the majority of the day in bed watching series, glad that you belonged to each other now.

[lilysdaydreams]

The Artist and The Musician

→  I do not claim to know corpse- therefore please don’t think that this is what he would actually act like, or that any details about his life are actually true. this is fiction.

→ Pairing: Corpse Husband X Fem!Reader

→ Genre: Fluff.

→ Words: 5.6k

→ Request:  Hey! It’s me again lmao I was curious maybe like sykunno or raes little sister (like 2 or 3 years younger) meets the group and her and corpse just click. How would either of them react to them hearing the news that their little sis is dating corpse and like they’ve moved in together and everything idk I thought it’d be cute💛

→ Warnings: Swearing.

→ Authors Note: Its been a hard couple of weeks and im really sorry that this took so long to be done but depression rlly hit me and I could barely move myself. I hope you enjoy this, and if you do, please comment some words of encouragement or feedback 💛

→  if you have some spare change , consider buying me a coffee.

You sighed as you finally dropped the last box in your new room, stretching to get rid of the pains in your back. Grabbing your phone, you moved over to Sykkunos room, knocking before sticking your head in.

"You want subway?" you asked when he looked up from the computer. He nodded with a quick smile, and as you closed the door behind you, you could hear him talking to the stream, letting them know that it was just his sister. Quickly ordering on Ubereats, you slumped on the sofa, closing your eyes and resting for a bit.

You had decided to move in with Sykkuno a month ago, the same week you'd decided to drop out of college. It wasn't something your parents were happy with, but after seeing how big your art and business had gotten, they had let you drop out. You'd dropped out and moved to LA, moving into an apartment with Sykkuno since he had to leave the OTV house. Sykkuno had moved in a week earlier which was why his room and computer was all set up. You'd only moved in today, spending a few weeks at home with your parents before leaving for LA. Stretching, you grabbed your phone, checking how long it would be until the food came, and then clicking on Instagram. Your most recent post was of this morning, a photo of you sitting on top of half the boxes in your room, throwing a peace sign at the camera. Sykkuno had taken it for you, the whole process taking 10 minutes cuz you made him take it at 45 different angles. Scrolling through the comments, you liked a few, replying to the ones by your best friends.

@selinaissss: "HOW DARE YOU LOOK THIS PERFECT AT 8 IN THE MORNING????"

→ @junefarie: i look like a racoon dont u dare

@onlyalyssa: "we need a house tour"

→ @junefarie: bitch I dont even have a bed yet

You grabbed the subway order when the bell rang, saying a quick thank you to the delivery man. You left yours on the table, and went to Sykkunos room, yelling "Sykkuno catch!" before throwing it at him, giggling as he leapt forward from his chair to catch it. Closing the door softly behind you, you jumped onto the couch, sitting cross-legged, grabbing your sketchbook and pencils from your backpack and setting them on your lap. It was time to wind down a bit.

~

It was a week later and you had unpacked fully, now focusing more on creating new pieces of art for a shop update. You were also working on some designs specifically for shirts and hoodies. Sykkuno found you in front of your computer, blanket wrapped around you and glasses perched on your nose as you emailed the manufacturer you were working with for the hoodies.

"Un, y/n?" he said hesitantly knocking on the door. You spun around in your chair, raising your eyebrows at him. "What's up?"

He walked in, sitting down gingerly on the edge of the bed and you got your water from the table, taking a sip as you wait for him to talk.

"I um- You know how I- I play Among Us right?" he asked, scratching his neck.

You hummed in response, urging him on with a nod. Sykkuno was almost never this nervous around you. Most of the time, you guys talked normally, joking and teasing each other. For him to be stuttering around you, he must have been extremely nervous.

"Well, you know Rae right? She um, she asked me to make a lobby," he said, standing up and pacing now. You furrowed your brows, confused as to where this was going.

He was explaining what a lobby was (which what the fuck, you watched his streams, of course you knew what a lobby was, why was he explaining that) when you cut him off, getting up and grabbing his shoulders to stop him.

"Hey, what's wrong?" you asked, holding his shoulders with both your hands.

He sighed and slumped into you, his head coming to a rest on your shoulder.

"Rae asked me to make a lobby and it's the first time I've ever made one and I'm really nervous about it. I've already invited people, but um I was wondering if you wanted to join as well? I- It would help me to have you there." he muttered, the words muffled as he spoke into your shoulder.

"Me?" you asked, a little shocked because you had never played among us before.

He nodded against your shoulder.

"Um sure!" you said, wrapping your arms around his middle, "It'll be fun!"

"And hey," you added on when he didn't say anything after that, "I can meet all your friends as well!"

He finally lifted his head a little, smiling as he muttered out a quick "Thanks y/n."

"However," you added, jumping back onto your seat and wiggling your eyebrows at him. "You have to buy me pizza for tonight's dinner."

He chuckled, grabbing his phone and already mutterng the order to himself as he opened up the ubereats app and walked out of the room.

You turned back to the laptop humming a tune under your breath. From interactions like this, most people would probably assume that you were older but the truth was that Sykkuno was 5 years older than you. Your roles were reversed and you were probably more protective over him than anyone else. Once in high school a girl had called him cute and asked him for his number only to write it on the bathroom walls. After the first three prank calls, you'd taken the phone from him yelling at anyone who called that if they called again, that you'd personally track them down and shove a dildo up their ass.

Both of you had always been close, but with the amount of bullying and teasing he got in high school, you'd got even closer, eventually becoming his best friend in a way. Seeing Sykkuno grow as a person, get new friends who were genuinely nice and kind made you the happiest person alive. When Sykkuno had first started streaming you'd been worried, scared that people online would say something mean. When he had first started streaming with other streamers and then met Lily and all his other friends, you had been anxious, worrying that they might only be putting up a friendly facade. You were also the happiest though when he grew even closer to them, when he smiled more, laughed more, talked more.

You had yet to meet or talk to any of his friends, mostly because you'd been in college, and the pandemic had made it harder. Maybe it was finally time.

~

The day came and you sat in your room, once again a blanket wrapped around you, glasses perched on your nose as you accepted the discord invite Sykkuno sent you.

"DO I GO IN THE CHAT THINGY?" you yelled to Sykkuno, hearing a "YES" before clicking on the voice chat.

You mumbled a "hello", wondering if your mic was on.

"Hey, yeah I can hear you y/n."

Breathing a sigh of relief, you logged into the game, smiling as you heard sykkuno introduce you to his chat. "Hi everyone," you said, feeling a bit weird only talking to a screen. You rubbed your hands, a little nervous to be doing this.

Just then someone else joined and before you could even speak another three people joined as well, all of them yelling hello as they joined.

"He- Hey guys, how's everyone doing?" started sykkuno.

"Im doing great oh my god, guess what guys, I'm-" started Rae, cutting herself off. "wait, whos um "ms snores a lot"?

You were a bit confused for a second, furrowing you eyebrows for a second before realising what had happened.

"SYKKUNO YOU ASSHOLE WHAT THE FUCK?" you yelled, staring at the name underneath the voice channel that you now realised belonged to you. You could hear Sykkunos laughter from the other room but you just spluttered indignantly. He was the one who had set up everything on your computer yesterday because technology was something that you rarely messed around with.

"Sykkunooo" you whined, when he kept laughing, "How the fuck do I change it now?"

"Um wait, sykkuno who is this?" asked Rae, the other three echoing her. You glanced at the names and from the voices figured out that it was Rae, Toast, Sean and Corpse in the lobby.

"Hey okay, so guys this is my sister, her names y/n and we recently moved in together, so I asked her to be in the lobby because... um.." he said stuttering at the end to find a reason.

"Because he wanted to embarrass me apparently!" you exclaimed, giving him a way out.

"Oh god, um - you can change it in settings, at the bottom near where your name is."

"Ahhh," you said finding it and then simply typing in your art business name.

"Its nice to meet everyone by the way," you started. "I've been watching your videos for ages so it almost fels like I already know you"

Raes voice started in your ears and you winced at the volume befoe turning it down a bit.

"I would love to say that Sykkuno has told us a lot about you, but the truth is that he keeps a lot of secrets and I didnt even know he had a sister, I AM SO SHOCKED RIGHT NOW"

You gasped. "Sykkuno what the fuck, you didn't even tell Rae?"

"You told me not to tell a lot of people!" he protested.

You heard someone saying "they're so different!' but you ignored it and kept talking.

"Yeah at the start! and on stream! I can't believe you never even said you had a sister." you spluttered out, followed by another gasp.

"Are you embarrassed of me?" you whispered dramatically.

"N-What no of course not!" he exclaimed, and you could also imagine how wide his eyes would have gotten.

You giggled before telling him that you were only joking.

"Um since sykkuno is embarrassed of me," you said jokingly, "I'll just tell you myself."

"I'm like five years younger than sykkuno, I'm a June baby, I do art, my star sign is cancer, I'm 5'4, I recently moved in with sykkuno, and my favourite colour is purple!"

"Oh is that why your username is junefarie? Because you were born in June?" asked Sean.

Before you could say yes, someone else cut in.

"Wait, junefarie?" asked corpse, "like the artist?"

Your eyes widened as you realised that he knew you. Sure you had quite a few followers, but you never expected any of Sykkunos friends to know you from there.

"Um yeah," you said letting out a shocked laugh, "I didnt expect anyone here to know about me."

"Dude, your art is fire!" he exclaimed, voice louder now. "I was honestly thinking of buying a piece soon, I've followed you for ages!"

"Wait, I wanna see as well." whined Rae, "Ima look you up, are you on Instagram?"

"Um," you said still shocked by the fact that somone this big knew you. "yeah I'm on instagram, its just junefarie." you said first replying to Rae, "Um corpse, thankyou so much! thats so nice of yo!"

"Um my art isn't that great yet," you chuckled, embarrassed by all the attention now. "I'm hoping to improve a lot more and I have a bunch of ideas for it as well. I'm hoping to work more now that I moved in with Sy."

"Oh my god, this is amazing," whispered Rae, Toast and Sean echoing her. You ducked your head even though no one could see you. Your cheeks were blazing hot and you pressed your hands to them to cool yourself down.

"Thankyou," you mumbled, not sure what to say.

Someone else entered the lobby, and said "hi" and you welcomed the source of distraction.

"Hi! I'm Sykkunos sister, y/n!" you said , wanting to move away from the topic of your art.

The reply of "sykkuno has a SISTER?" made everyone laugh, successfully moving the attention to Sykkuno and off your art. Finally Sykkuno started the game and you breathed as you lost yourself in the art of gaming.

"OH MY GOD!" yelled Rae as the game ended and everyone appeared in the lobby. "That was like amazing, Y/N I cant belive you pulled that off!"

She was talking about the last game where there was 50/50 between corpse and Sykkuno (because you refused to kill sykkuno when you were imposter) and you somehow managed to convince Sykkuno that it was Corpse.

"Honestly, neither can I!" you exclaimed back staring at your screen, eyes blurring the screen because of how tired you were.

"I can't believe Sykkuno," mumbled corpse. "I literally said I saw her vent and kill toast and Sykkuno was still like "hmmm, I don't think so."

Giggling at Sykkunos yell of "SHES MY SISTER" you yelled out a bye as everyone started leaving and then struggled to find a way to end the call.

"Wait, how do I end it," you muttered to yourself.

You jumped as Corpse talked, not expecting anyone to be there.

"You can see yoru name at the bottom left right? Its above that but a little to the right." he said chucling a little.

"Oh." you said, you cheeks heating up. You didnt know if it was because of him or because you were utterly useless with technology.

"Um thankyou," you said awkwardly.

"No problem."

You exited out of the call, a small smile at your lips.

Sykkunos friends were nice.

~

After the stream, your fanbase grew, and with it, the number of orders as well. For the next week, you were buried under orders, only leaving the house to go to the post office.

An Instagram post on @junefarie account: 

[ID: A photo of y/n and sykkuno standing in the middle of the living room, packages scattered everywhere. Y/n is hugging Sykkuno tight and Sykkuno is staring at the camera, a distressed look on his face.]

Caption: Thankyou so much for all my supporters and all the love shown to me. Sending out loads of orders and I cant wait for you gusy to get yours! Special thanks to @sykkuno for helping me send out orders. luv yu.

Comments: 

@Sykisacutie: best sibling duo!

@valkyrae: hope my order is in their as well.

→ I SCREAMED WHEN SY TOLD ME THAT WAS YOUR NAME.

@corpse_husband: sykkuno looks like he's accepted death.

→ @sykkuno: I would have welcomed death at that point

→ @corpse_husband @sykkuno: okay ill be honest, I would have welcomed death as well.

@ariesin: go best friend, go! we need to get together to paint soon !!

→ SOONNNNNN

~

You flopped onto your bed, every part of your body hurting. Carrying boxes filled with orders down the stairs had tired your whole body, which wasn't used to any exercise at all. That had taken practically the whole day and then you had to clean your room because the mess from the orders had barely left any room to move. You flung your hand to the side, grabbing your phone from the table and bringing it up to your face. The "1:02" was clearly visible on your screen and you unlocked the phone, heading to Twitter. Scrolling through your feed, you liked a few tweets from friends before gearing yourself up and moving to the messages. Ever since you'd played with Corpse, Sykkuno and everyone, you'd been getting a lot of messages. Most of them were just the streamers fans, asking you if you know them or telling you to take care of sykkuno. There were a few though that targeted you, telling you that your art sucked, that they didn't know why Corpse could like my art. You'd taken to deleting them before sleeping so that your inbox wouldn't get cluttered and you could still find any serious requests or messages from your followers. Therefore, you didn't really think anything of it when there was another message from someone with a Corpse icon and you clicked on it only to see the message and gasp, immediately sitting up in bed.

Corpse_Husband → Hey, I was wondering if I could work with you on something? I really love your art and was wanting to commission or collaborate for an album cover or some merch designs. Message me on this number cuz I barely see my dms.

Underneath was a number.

"Oh my god," you whispered, unsure as to what to do.

When you had decided to drop out of college, you had expected hard days. You had expected your normal orders and mostly just improving your art and marketing it more. You had expected long days and not much money in the bank account. You certainly had not expected the immense amount of orders you'd gotten. Along with that, the amount of love and support had taken you by surprise and you had spent the last night crying because of how much love you and your art were getting.

You had also not expected such a big opportunity just landing at your feet.

Quickly you clicked on the number, putting it in your contacts with the name Corpse and then writing a quick message.

"Hey I got your twitter dm! I've personally never done art for merch or album covers but I would love the opportunity!"

You bit your lip, confused as to whether that was enough before deciding it was fine and just sent it.

Your heart beat a little faster as you slumped back onto the bed.

~

@junefarie Instagram story:

[ID: A zoomed-in picture of a drawing, the only part that was visible was curly hair. The text read: "Working on something SO COOL"]

~

Your phone was ringing. Stuffing the rest of the pizza in your mouth, you swept your hand over the covers of your bed, trying to find it. With a muttered "aha", you grabbed it and swiped on the call before it ended. Pressing the phone to your ear, you mumbled a "hello", still chewing the pizza bite.

A low rapsy voice came out of the speaker, one that you definitely didn't expect. You choked on the pizza, coughing out pieces onto the bed.  Sure you guys had messaged each other a bit (you kinda had to because of the commission), but you hadn't expected him to call out of nowhere.

"Um I hope this isn't a bad time," he said when you didn't respond for a second. Of course, he didn't exactly know that hearing his voice so close to your ear had you frozen for a second.

"Um no," you replied, coughing slightly to clear your throat. "It's fine! What did you wanna talk about?"

"Oh, um I know you're already working on the commission and its looking great! I can't wait to work with the merch team to create something really cool with it, but um-" he broke off for a second sounding hesitant. "I really wanna get another commission done as well."

"Oh?" you said after a second when he didn't reply. "I'd be happy to do another one for you!"

"Uh yeah, but I'm afraid that I might be a bit late, You see I was wondering if it could be done before Christmas?"

You sucked in a breath as you counted the days in your mind.

"Hmm, it depends on how big it is tbh. There's still 2 weeks to go till Christmas so I could fit it in," you mumbled, biting your lip as you remembered the onslaught of orders you still had to send out.

"Well," he started and you smiled a little as the excitement crept into his voice. "You know that Sykkuno, Rae, Toast and me are called the 4 Amigops right? I kinda wanted a portrait of all 4 of us, in our um among us colors, and I basically wanted to print it out and send to each of them for Christmas."

"Aww, that sounds like such a good idea, I'm sure they'll all love it!" you smiled, thinking about how much Sykkuno would appreciate that.

"Uh thanks," he mumbled, "do you think you can get it done?"

"Sure!" you replied immediately. You did have a lot of orders, yes, but like, you could fit Corpse in. If you pulled a few all-nighters. "I'll send you the sketches soon okay?"

"Oh thank god, thankyu so much for this y/n, I really appreciate it. Youre one of my favourite artists and I'm really happy that I could finally commisison you after so long."

"So long?" you questioned. "Since when have you known about my art?"

There was a moment of silence and then "Um, around the time you still posted your sketches and stuff I guess?"

You furrowed your eyebrows thinking for a second before letting out a gasp.

"Corpse that was 4 years ago!"

"Oh really?"

"Yeah, oh my god, I cant believe you've seen those, I was so bad then!"

"No no, they were really good at that time as well! I was so shocked when Sykkuno told us you were his sister because like, I'd been following you for ages and I had absolutely no idea. You guys are like really different."

"Hah yah, Sykkunos so soft, and then there's me. An actual devil."

"Your usernames so different as well! I remember when I first saw a picture of you on your account and I was kind of shocked because based on the name junefarie, I was expecting someone very soft I guess but then you were literally the opposite and wearing actual devil horns."

"Oh god, that was one of the first few photos I posted of myself. that was on Halloween I think,", you took a deep breath still shocked that Corpse had known about you for that long,

"Yeah, I chose junefarie because...”

It was 2 hours later when Corpse said that he should probably be working on his music.

"Oh I'm so sorry," you apologized, "I didn't mean to keep you,"

"Oh no, I um, I liked talking to you."

Your breath caught for a moment and you smiled like a lunatic at your Pokémon covered bedsheets.

"I liked talking to you as well," you whispered out, heart sinking a little as you realized the call would be ending soon.

"Um, do you, maybe want to stay on call? like I'll just be writing and we can just chill?" he asked and you felt like your prayers had been answered.

"yes" you said quickly, not giving him a chance to back out.

He chuckled, and you fell in love a little.

Just a little.

~

You continued like that, calling each other every few days, talking so much and then at times, not talking at all, simply content with each others company.

He had even started facetiming you, the first time with a mask and then the second without it. You hadn't made a big deal about it, but the first time you saw him, you could barely breathe.

There were five days left until Christmas when you got the idea.

You were entirely not subtle about it, because, well to be honest, there wasn't a subtle bone in your body.

"Hey Corpse, do you like surprises?" you had asked, in the middle of colouring Raes hair (her hair was the last thing left before you could finally print the goddamn thing)

"It depends," he had murmured after a second, voice sending shivers down your spine like every time. Now whether that was because of his voice or because of him, you weren't entirely sure.

"on what?" you prodded when he refused to answer.

"On whether its a good one or a bad one" he had huffed out.

You had hummed, waited for a second and then blurted out that next question because you did not have a cent of patience.

"So what are you doing at Christmas?"

"Sleeping, if I can manage it," he replied, his voice taking on a sardonic tone, eyes flicking to you on the screen. The only thing he could see though was the top of your head because you had your iPad on the bed and were laying over it as you drew.

"Not with that attitude you aren't," you replied right back, making a small smile appear across his face.

"Hmmm, okay!" you said when he didn't reply.

He looked back over, eyebrows furrowed and mouth opening as he started to question you.

"Hey did you see the video I sent you?" you quickly asked distracting him from his question.

He would probably guess the surprise but that was okay. You only wanted to make a smile appear on his face. And honestly, for someone with anxiety, a small warning of a surprise was definitely needed.

~

It was Christmas day and you woke Sykkuno up at 6 in the morning with the promise that you'd buy him McDonald's. 30 minutes later, you were both in the car, yelling the lyrics to "All I want for Christmas" at the top of your lungs.

You had told sykkuno of your plan a few days ago and he had smiled at you with that stupid smile, agreeing with a small "alright."

You'd immediately realised that he knew. Even though you pretended otherwise, Sykkuno was the older one and the thing about older siblings was that they always knew.

They always knew.

So there you were, snacks loaded into your car, McDonald's fries practically everywhere, and a cake you had made in the backseat, on your way to Corpses house.

There was a lull in the music, and you were only 30 minutes away from his place, butterflies fluttering in your stomach when Sykkuno asked you a question.

"You like him right?" he murmured, head leaning against the window, eyes closed.

There was a moment of silence as you thought about what to say. Did you like Corpse? Of course, you liked Corpse! He was funny, he was nice, he made you feel like you were the only person that mattered and your heart beat faster than ever whenever he looked at you. Hell, that was through a screen, in real life, it would probably be even worse. So of course you liked him! The question was, did he like you back?

"Yeah," you answered Sykkuno, eyes straight on the road.

A second passed and then he smiled. "Good," he replied. and well. That was that. You sighed.

At least you had your brothers blessing.

~

Pulling into the apartment building, you breathed in, your heart beating a million times a second and the butterflies in your stomach had turned into snakes. Maybe, maybe this wasn't a good idea at all. I mean, you expected Corpse to get the hint but what if he didn't? and what if he didn't want you to come? Maybe you were being too quick. After all, It'd only been a month since you'd met.

These thoughts plagued your mind as you trudged up the stairs, turning to Sykkuno as you reached the door.

"Maybe we shouldn't have come," you whispered to him.

He looked at you, eyebrows high, "We just travelled two hours to get here. There's no way im going back without at least giving him the print."

"What if he doesn't want us to be here?" you hissed.

"Then we'll go away." he stated, "after we give him the print."

"But what if-"

Before you could even finish your sentence, the door opened and you both jumped, turning to face the person standing in the doorway.

You forced yourself to breathe as you finally saw him. It was him. Wearing a black beanie, half his hair spilling out the sides, stubble clear on his chin... it was him. At that moment, there was only one thought in your mind.

You were gonna marry this man.

"You suck at whispering," he said, and you huffed out a laugh, jumping onto him without even responding. You wrapped your arms around him, not letting go until Sykkuno cleared his throat from behind you.

You turned back immediately, grabbing the stuff in Sykkunos hands so he could greet Corpse too. As they awkwardly did their handshake/fistbump thing, you walked over to the couch behind them, putting down the print and the takeaway bags, and putting the cakebox down on the table.

You turned around to see them both standing there staring at you.

"Surprise?" you said when no one else spoke. That broke the ice a little and you grabbed the print from the couch thrusting it at Corpse.

"Open it. Open it. Open it." you mumbled, your heart beating fast as he carefully ripped the paper off. The smile that overtook his face made your heart immediately calm.

"It's beautiful," he whispered, eyes roaming everywhere, trying to take it all in. Clearing his throat, he nodded his head further into the apartment, mumbling that he was going to put it in the room, eyes still on the print as he walked there.

"You smile is gonna blind me," muttered Sykkuno.

"Oh shut up."

~

A few hours later, you stood in the kitchen, putting the leftover cake into Corpses fridge. You had all chilled, eating cake and the takeout that you and sykkuno had bought, laughing every few minutes. It felt like you were all on an adrenaline rush. You had facetimed Rae and Toast, Rae shrieking when she realised where you guys were. Sykkuno had just fallen into a nap, still tired from being wakened up so early, you assumed.

You leaned against the kitchen bench, smiling as Corpse walked in.

"Thankyou." he said as he came to a stop next to you, matching your position.

"For what?" you mused, even though you had a good enough idea.

"For the print. For coming here. For making my Christmas, a much happier affair than it has been my whole life." he stated, chuckling at the last point.

You turned your head sideways, and you didn't know what it was, but something about his face made you spurn into action. You grabbed his collar, pulled him down, and kissed him before he could even say anything. It would be too cliche to say that fireworks erupted. And if you were being honest they didn't. Instead, it felt like everything was finally right. You fit perfectly in his arms as they wrapped themselves around you, and you smiled into the kiss as he lifted you up, making you sit at the counter. You twirled the hair at the nape of his neck with your left hand, taking a deep breath in as you both slowed down and pulled away.

"Well," he whispered, "that was unexpected."

You raised a single eyebrow. Honesty you'd done a lot for this relationship. You just drove for nearly 3 hours! If he wanted it to progress, he was gonna have to say it himself.

"But not unwelcome," he continued when you didn't speak. A moment passed, where you could see that he was psyching himself up to say something. Finally, with a heaving sigh, he whispered  "Darling, would you do me the honour of being called yours?"

You melted right there.

A nod was all he needed before he grabbed your lips with his again, both of you giggling when he accidentally hit the side of your mouth instead of the lips.

The sound of a picture being taken filled the air, making you spring apart and swing your heads over to the doorway, which had sykkuno leaning against it, his phone in his hand.

"Thank god. Rae and Toast bet that you wouldn't confess until after Christmas, so now they both owe me 20 bucks." he said, now fiddling on the phone. "Dont worry Corpse, I'll add a circle over your face or something."

Your mouth dropped open as you stared at your brother.

"You bet on my love life?" you scoffed, still shocked.

At his nod though, you swung off the bench, marching until you were eye to eye to him.

"I want half the winnings."

Rolling his eyes, he turned back to the living room, jumping onto the sofa.

"C'mon, let's watch one more episode before heading back," he said and you jumped in next to him, patting the space next to you as Corpse came in behind you.

You grabbed Sykkunos hand and squeezed it, letting him know that you were grateful that he didn't make it such a big deal. Leaning your head on corpses shoulder, you smiled to yourself.

You'd have to leave in 30 minutes, to drive back to your parents and spend the rest of Christmas with them, leaving Corpse behind. And that made you a bit sad sure, but it couldn't overpower the feeling of pure happiness at being here. At giving him a happier Christmas. You smiled as he pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

Nothing could overpower this feeling of absolute happiness.

fin.

Corpse husband taglist:  @mythicalamphitrite @ramble-writes @atsumubabe @anxiouskat5646 @itssierramcquade @xaestheticalien @jotaroslightning @starstruckllamapuppy @gxldenskiez @shinyshimaagain @cavanana @fee-btheweeb (send an ask to be added!)