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notinthemaps · 4 years

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Know before you go and what I’ve learned from traveling:

It’s not a race. I was always so bummed about the number of countries I’ve been to compared to other people my age until I understood that the number of places visited is not what traveling is about at all. It’s not important about how many places you’ve been but the depth you’ve explored them. I have been to some beautiful places all around the world that I am insanely grateful for and it’s incredibly toxic to compare my journey to others.

Traveling is an absolute privilege. Before you spew “everyone can travel, it can be done so cheap!” recognize where you come from.

Before you book that trip to Haiti or Cambodia to “go build a school” or volunteer at an orphanage, research the hidden harm that is involved with your short term stay. Your good intentions can actually be causing harm within these communities.

This also accounts for volunteering at animal and wildlife sanctuaries as well. You could unknowingly be volunteering at a place that secretly participated in “canned hunting”. So many sanctuaries have been accused of this in the past and I’m sure they’re still out there. Now, not all places are bad, just make sure your money and time are going towards something that will really help ethical animals and wildlife sanctuaries. This is where it’s important to do your research.

Clean. Get rid of shit. Simplify to the necessities. Pack light. The weight of your luggage is equally proportionate to your misery while traveling. I’ve learned this the hard way.

You have the power to choose love. Always choose to love.

Stop the exploitation of animals as you travel. Meaning the Luwak cafes in Indonesia where you drink the coffee after the Luwak has digested the coffee beans. Stop swimming with dolphins, participating in lion walks, taking photos next to chained up tigers, riding elephants, camels, and donkeys/mules. These animals are most likely not taken care of very well. There have been times where I have been guilty of giving in to attending these places because they sound great (who doesn’t want a photo with a lion next to you?) but in hindsight, these attractions are most likely incredibly unethical and there’s a lot of physical/emotional harm that is involved with the training the animals.

Reduce your use of plastic abroad.

Going alone is okay. If we all waited for someone to travel with us, we’d be waiting for a very, very long time. So, please go even if you have no one to go with. There are millions of people all over the world that are just waiting to meet you. Some of them you’ll meet in a hostel room and you’ll end up spending the night walking through the street markets, some of them you’ll meet at a bar and discover new corners of a city you didn’t know existed, some of them you’ll meet sitting on a bench at a bus stop and you’ll end up sharing the best coffee you’ve probably ever had, some of them you’ll meet watching the sunset on the beach and you’ll end up sharing stories and laughing with them until the morning and some of them will end up being your best friends. And sometimes you’re going to be alone and going on tours, to the movies, or to restaurants sounds scary to do by yourself at first but soon enough you’ll learn that it is completely okay to be alone. Solo does not mean lonely.

Don’t say you don’t like anything until you try it more than once.

Save your change.

One of the most reassuring things in this world is that you are never stuck anywhere. You are never unable to leave.

Don’t avoid taking care of your mental health when abroad. Traveling is exhausting and not always rainbows and butterflies. Your mind and body are still important.

Write about your favorite moments, your least favorite moments, ideas, people you’ve met, strangers you’ve walked past on the street, favorite quotes, words to remember, what the sky looked like at 7pm, new songs you’ve discovered and what they mean to you, places you want to go or places you’ve been, write about your passions, how you feel in this exact moment, draw out the mountains, scribble all over the pages. And when that one gets full, buy a new one. Reread it in 2 years, 20 years, when you need a good laugh, when you’re upset and can’t get out of bed, read it to your children. You need to remember these moments in your life. They are so important.

Spend less time on social media. It’s no secret that social media is addictive and it’s really good at taking away precious moments. It’s important to not be glued to your phone or laptop while abroad. Social media will always be there for you when you get home.

Traveling is overly romanticized. It is very hard work. It does not solve all the problems that you have at home. And traveling is not what it looks like on Instagram. Please don’t feel bad because your experience doesn’t feel the way that it looks like it should on Instagram.

When you’re eating, really taste your food. Talk to the locals. Immerse yourself fully into this new culture. When you’re out hiking, let go of your phone. This is how you’re going to get the best experience possible. Live in the moment.

Take photos. It is physically impossible to remember all these moments in your life. Someday down the road, maybe when you’re feeling a little depressed or bored, you can grab your camera and scroll through these photos that’ll remind you of some of the best times of your life. Ask permission before you take a photo of someone. Ask permission to post it on social media (if these are your intentions) and let them know 1,000s of people will have access or will be seeing these photos. Remember: kids can never consent. Just don’t take photos in orphanages or schools. It’s really important to be respectful. People are not props.

Usually, no one wants to hear more than a few sentences about your trip when you come home other than your mom. And the references you make months after your trip, “when I was in...” will sometimes result in an eye roll. Shake it off. I know it can be hurtful but it’s best to just keep it to a minimum for your own sanity.

It’s okay to look like a tourist. Visit the big touristy places and take your picture pushing against the Leaning Tower of Pisa. You’re not better than every other traveler just because you skipped the popular areas.

Learn the basics of the language before you go. “where’s the bathroom? how are you? what's your name? My name is..” Always remember it’s your fault for not learning the language of the country you're in, it’s never anyone else's fault for not knowing English. Keep the language barrier frustration to a minimum. Hand gestures, a smile, and patience can go a long way!

You’ll probably get sick at some point. Be prepared for it with a little first aid kit! It’s always a good idea to have insurance.

It’s important to not judge the way in which other people travel. I’ve met people who have planned their travel to the point where they do not participate in any tourist activities and live off one meal a day and then I’ve met people who pay for every excursion in every city they go to. And I find my initial thoughts to be “...but why?” and I eventually snap out of it and realize it’s not my place to judge how people travel. Everyone experiences places in their own unique, meaningful way. And I mean who really cares if someone is traveling the world full time on mom and dad's money? It doesn’t affect you.

Cheesy souvenirs are never worth it. Collect sea glass, your train tickets, plane tickets, maps, stickers, and coins. Chances are those Colosseum magnets you bought in Rome were really made in China. Support the locals if you’re going to buy souvenirs.

Slow down.

Google the tipping etiquette within the country you’re visiting before you go. Some places it’s rude, some places it’s the only income someone has. Don’t be the person who “didn’t know” when the information is a 5-second google away.

Jetlag freaking sucks but it happens to all of us.

Be prepared to be uncomfortable and be open-minded. You’ll probably wash your clothes in a bucket or sink, sleep in dirty beds or on airport floors, be forced to eat with your hands even though you’ve never done it or go without toilet paper for weeks at a time! It’s all apart of the journey.

The world is not as bad and scary as the news makes it out to be.

Nothing will ever go as you expect it to. Plans go out the door. I learned this the hard way. In fact, I am sure every traveler has learned this the hard way. You’ll miss flights, you’ll get flat tires on road trips, you’ll end up spending a lot more money than you expected, you’ll miss buses, you’ll have to run to trains to get to them on time, I promise you’ll have a dead battery when all you want to do is call mom to make you feel better, the hostel you wanted will be full, your dumb airline will lose all your luggage, things will get canceled and you’ll spend many unexpected nights crying but despite all the struggles that traveling brings upon us, it is always worth it. The tears, sore shoulders and blistered feet are always worth it. There’s no point in getting mad that your plan fell through.

We are all going to make mistakes as travelers. We have to become better researchers and better listeners. Ignoring the requests of locals or the cultural differences is absolute ignorance and another example of flaunting your privilege. Just because you are a tourist and contributing to the economy of other countries does not mean it’s okay to be disrespectful and act as you please. However, we’re going to make mistakes and it’s important to not beat yourself up over it. What’s important is how we respond. Don’t be scared to ask questions.

#traveling #me

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babethepig · 6 years

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sometimes I wonder (¿qué pasaría?)

Summary: Dan looks at him and smiles, and the sun frames his face and suddenly the landscape is the second most beautiful thing Phil has seen that day.

or dan and phil met at a hostel au.

Word count: 1.7K (I’m not sorry)

Rating: T

(read on ao3)

I really hope this is not too reminiscent of my last work for the flash fic fest but when someone says summer I can only think about my beloved Peninsula de Yucatán.

I took some liberties with this one. I have been to Tulum but I have never stayed at a hostel. Hopefully, this isn't (too) unrealistic.

I wrote this for the @phandomficfests summer au flash fest. I’m very sorry it’s a mess, I’m more a reader than a writer. Also Spanish is my mother tongue so I might have made a lot of mistakes.

Phil finds him when he isn’t even looking for him. In a foreign country, at a hostel, in the middle of summer.

He has curly hair and brown eyes and a shy smile. He’s wearing a hoodie even though they’re at melting temperature and he is probably coming from the town.

“Is that bed free?” He asks Phil, pointing at the top bunk right above his.

“I don’t know… I mean- Yes!” Phil answers, always making a fool of himself in front of cute strangers.

“Okay,” he sounds a little unsure as he throws his backpack on the bed and wheels his small suitcase into a corner of the room. “My name’s Dan… I’m from England.”

“I noticed!” Phil says and then.“Sorry! The accent! I’m Phil, from England too!” He definitely needs to chill a little.

But Dan laughs and suddenly he doesn’t mind to embarrass himself if he is going to be rewarded with that sound.

“Uh, It’s cool we both English I guess.” Now he is standing awkwardly and Phil wonders if he should stand up and shake his hand. He knows nothing about hostel etiquette. “Have you meet our other roommates?”

“Yeah, they’re two Spanish girls. They came here together.”

“I see… You came alone? I don’t want to assume anything it’s just- someone told me to maybe make friends with someone from the hostel? I don’t know, I have never done something like this before,” he says all at once, Phil barely catches up with what he is saying. “Sorry for the rant.” Dan laughs shortly and looks at him expectantly.

“We can totally be friends! I mean if you don’t mind a little awkwardness.”

“I don’t. You just heard me talking, it can only get more awkward.” Dan smiles fully and Phil notices that he has two dimples.

Phil wonders for how long you need to know someone to squeeze their face.

---

They decide to go to the common area so they can actually talk to each other without anyone having to stand in the middle of the room. The energy between them is one hundred percent weird energy but Phil doesn’t think it’s completely a bad thing, after all, they just met.

“You know,” Dan says after an almost too long moment of silence. “You can totally tell me to back off if it is creepy. You don’t have to do anything with me if you don’t want to.” Pause “That sounded wrong, sorry.”

“Hey! it’s fine, I literally don’t have a plan. I wouldn't mind the company.”

“Sorry, I’m an overthinker. And I should stop saying sorry.” Then he frowns “What do you mean you don’t have a plan?”

“Uhm, my brother and his girlfriend came here a while ago and he said it was awesome and I should totally come someday. So I did. And I just realized that I don’t know anything about this place.”

Phil should have known better than to take a flight to Mexico just because once Martyn told him it was great, but he had just wanted to run away from London. Go somewhere new.

It wasn’t a Phil move at all. He had planned to go on vacation, he had even saved some money to do so but he didn't know where. And one night he couldn’t sleep so he opened his laptop and booked a flight to the other side of the world. He was never impulsive like that but he had remembered the beach on Martyn’s pictures. The ocean painted in three different shades of blue, the pure sand. He needed to come.

“Well, I actually did a lot of research and also made a lot of plans and you can tag along if you want.” Dan scratches his neck and moves on his seat waiting for Phil’s answer.

He doesn’t know anything about Dan but he wants to say yes because when he decided to make this trip he took a risk. Why not take another one?

“Let’s do this Dan.” ---

The hostel has free bicycles that they can borrow to go to town. Phil can’t even remember the last time he rode one but he tries extra hard and Dan is extra patient so after a couple of nearly falls they get going.

The town is an explosion of color and culture. There are a lot of craft shops decorating the street and Phil is delighted.

They find a place to lock up their bikes and then walk looking for a restaurant. They take their time looking at the shops, Dan buys homemade chocolate and shares it with Phil. It looks kind of weird, shaped in a circle. But Phil takes a bite anyway.

“It’s too bitter!” Phil says as he sticks his tongue out.

“Yeah, this is evil chocolate.”

“Totally. It killed my taste buds, I don’t think I can recover from this.”

“It’s fine, we can get some cake somewhere.”

Phil stops walking, looks at him completely serious and says “Where have you been my whole life?” before he can stop himself.

And then he is blushing, but it’s fine because Dan is too.

---

They get on so well.

Phil has never felt this comfortable this quickly with anyone but they laugh so much together and they have so much in common. Dan is amazing and he likes to talk about anime and horror movies and he had an emo phase just like Phil. It’s crazy, they haven’t left each other’s sides for days. And the flirting! Phil hasn’t flirted like that since he was a teenager.

Phil wonders if this should feel wrong, spending so much time with Dan when they barely know each other; but it doesn’t. It’s completely the opposite.

“You know, if you are not sick of me yet we should go to the ruins today,” Dan tells him as he gets out of the bathroom, letting out a steamy cloud. They are alone in the room at the moment and Phil is laying starfish style on his bed.

“I would like that. I have always wanted to see the pyramids up close!.”

So they ride their bikes to the archaeological zone. It’s not as close as they expected and they get extremely sweaty. At least Dan is not wearing a sweater today.

“You ok mate? You look like you are going to pass out” Dan says, looking a little worried.

“Yeah?” he asks breathlessly “You better catch me then.” No too breathless to flirt though.

“I will.”

After buying their tickets, they get on a little train that takes them close to the pyramids and then they have to walk a quite long distance under the sun but Dan tries to distract him telling him facts about the place.

“Did you know that Tulum was built to be a fortress?”

“Did you know that Tulum was built by the aliens?” Phil says as serious as Dan.

“Phil!” Dan whines “That’s not true.”

“It is! How else could they have carried those rocks that high?”

“I don’t know. Science?”

“Nop. It was definitely the aliens”

And they could have kept fighting if the view hadn’t left them completely speechless.

They finally reached the top of the hill, and the landscape is the most beautiful thing Phil has ever seen. It seems like the ocean has no end, it spreads for kilometers of blues getting darker and darker and it is intimidating even looking at it from this high, Especially looking at it from this high.

Phil is overcome with excitement and he taps quickly at Dan’s arm even though he knows Dan is just as astonished as him. But Dan takes his hand and squeezes it gently and Phil is not as focused on the sea anymore.

Dan looks at him and smiles, and the sun frames his face and suddenly the landscape is the second most beautiful thing Phil has seen that day.

---

Phil’s time in Tulum is coming to an end and they are ignoring the fact that they only have one more day together.

Phil wakes up and waits for Dan to get up. When he does, they go out to town to get breakfast. Dan hasn’t got a lot planned for the day so they will walk around the shops and then go to the beach.

They pay to get into one of the beach clubs and then Dan finds them a place as far as possible from all the people there. They take turns to go buy drinks and eventually they give up and go for a swim.

The water is warmer than Phil expected so he almost doesn’t mind when Dan splashes him. Almost. They have a water fight and wrestle each other until they are both panting and laughing, laying on their backs on the seashore.

Dan takes his hand again but this time Phil feels sad.

---

They spend the rest of the day at the beach. Dan wants to stay as long as they can to watch the sunset and Phil is happy to tag along.

“Phil.” Dan suddenly says, still looking forward. “I’m sorry I didn’t ask you before but I didn’t want to get my hopes up,” he takes a deep breath and turns his head to Phil. “Where on England do you live?”

“London,” Phil whispers, putting all his faith in that single word. “You?”

“London.” Phil shouldn't be as happy as he is because this isn’t a yes to anything and yet it feels like a yes to everything. So he leans on, shortening the distance between them, he looks at Dan’s lips and then at his eyes; making the silent question. As his answer, Dan closes the distance completely.

Dan’s lips are a little chapped and he tastes like salt from the sea and peppermint from the mojito he was drinking, and a little bit like hope too; and if they weren’t at this family-friendly beach club Phil would be straddling him right now.

“Phil,” Dan whispers, with his lips attached to Phil’s. “Maybe...” he breathes hot air into his mouth. “Maybe we could meet again.”

“Maybe we could.” And they say maybe, nonetheless there is not a drop of uncertainty on their words.

Phil wasn’t looking for Dan when he found him, but he is glad he did.

** The chocolate mentioned is the one we use to make Chocolate Caliente and you are supposed to add sugar to the beverage. You can bite into it but it is bitter as hell.**

#phandom fic fest #phanfiction #mine #not as good as i wish it was

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harwardcenter · 3 years

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New Life Abroad: First Impressions

The land of fondue, top-tier chocolate, and endless adventures; these are just some of the several traits that make Switzerland what it is. There are so many picturesque points, and whether it be the beaches on Lake Geneva or the mountains visible in the distance from your apartment, there is something for everyone to marvel at and enjoy.

Lake Geneva/Lac Leman and the Swiss/Geneva flags

To start off, I actually had no idea I would be coming here. My original off-campus study plan involved me going to Serbia for a semester program focusing on transitional justice initiatives in Southeastern Europe. However, due to low program enrollment and the public health crisis, that was not possible. Luckily, I was offered the option to go to Switzerland for a program focusing on international relations and multilateral diplomacy, which is not only directly tied to my politics major, but also allows me to explore various topics within the realm of international relations.

The first week was the typical honeymoon phase. I was (and still am) amazed by how clean the country is. There is almost no trash on the sides of the road, and there is actually a robust waste management program that incentivizes people to produce as little waste as possible. Unlike water sources in the United States, many water sources here are very clear, such as Lake Geneva. I was pleasantly surprised to see it.

Another thing that impresses me is the public transport. Of course, public transport in Europe will generally be many times better than that of the United States, but seeing it myself in action is quite neat. For instance, my classes are in Geneva, the largest city in the western part of Switzerland. I live in a small town outside of Geneva called Nyon, which is a 15-20 minute train ride from Nyon. There are trains running each morning on 10-15 minute intervals, and more often than not, the time on the departure board is the time it leaves. Essentially, be on time for your train because the train system here is robust and efficient. While it usually is expensive to use the train for long-distances, my program gave all of us a Swiss travel pass to use on public transportation. I'm not sure how much it costs but my guess would be a few thousand CHF (local currency) because the pass is for unlimited use until our last day here. In other words, I can go from Nyon to Bern or to Interlaken as many times as I wish at any time of the day/night. Just make sure to have your pass as train staff checks for it. Otherwise, you could be fined in addition to paying the full train fare.

Train Network and Routes of the SBB (Swiss Federal Railways)

Being in Switzerland also means being in the land of incredible tasting chocolate. When I arrived, I was impressed by how much chocolate I saw at the stores. There are so many different brands, some local, and some national ones. When you travel around different towns, and even in the major city train stations, such as Geneva and Lausanne, you will find a chocolate store. Any chocolate fanatic must try the various chocolates available here.

Before coming here, I thought that Switzerland was a German speaking country (which it is to an extent). Much of it depends on which part of the country you are in. For example, where I am, which is in the Geneva area, is the French speaking region of the country. This would be most of what is west of Bern, the national capital. The north and central parts of the country are the German speaking parts, such as Zürich, Bern, Basel, and Luzern. Towards the southern tip close to Milan is the Italian speaking region, which includes cities like Lugano. In the Southeast, there is a fourth language spoken called Romansch. However, it is the least spoken out of the four and there are only a few thousand speakers of the language, which means it is unlikely you will encounter it outside that part of the country. When you travel, you will mainly hear French, German, and some Italian. Most people here know English, but it helps knowing a bit of the regional language so that when you order at a restaurant, you will know how to explain the portion size you want, whether you want carbonated water or standard water, or in general, greeting and thanking people. In my case, my Spanish has helped to an extent, and it has made French learning easier.

Swiss Breakfast at my homestay (lots of bread!)

In a new country, one is bound to have cultural shocks, being exposed to something that may be out-of-the-ordinary back home, or just general adjustments to a new life. One of these has been with my homestay. While I have not had bad experiences so far with my homestay family, the new rules and cultural norms have definitely been an adjustment. My family lives in an apartment in Nyon walking distance from the train station. There are lots of people living here but each apartment has lots of space inside. This means that quiet hours are precious! No showers after 10pm (with limited exceptions). No flushing the toilet in the middle of the night! The shower rule has not been too bad as I already showered around that time anyway, but I'm still mindful of not using it too late. Also, make sure to follow dining etiquette, including waiting for everyone to be seated, using and placing forks and knives correctly while eating, and taking the right amount of food as being respectful to this will go a long way. Dinner is always at 7pm at my house, unless mentioned otherwise. Most of my day is spent in Geneva, so this is not a problem for me. I want to note that these are the rules at my apartment/homestay. I have spoken with my peers on the program, and at their homestays, there are similar expectations. However, each household is different, so some may have more leeway with shower rules or dinner hours. When in doubt, ask your homestay parents about their expectations.

Another major shock in Switzerland (even when knowing about it before arrival) is definitely the cost of living. Lots of products, including food, dining out, utilities, houses, and apartments, are all more expensive than that of the United States. It is said that Geneva and Zürich are among the most expensive cities in the world to live in. From what my host brother has said about renting and buying property here, that is not a surprise. Apartments the size of an average home in the United States can reach high six-figures and into seven figures easily! Also, my host brother mentioned that here, one can make monthly payments on an apartment (similar to a house) and eventually pay it off. From what I'm aware, in the United States, you can only rent an apartment and that is that. However, salaries are much higher here, which offsets those costs. Luckily, my program was aware about these costs, so they gave us a generous stipend of a few hundred CHF for lunch. What I have done is limit going out to only the weekends, and on weekdays, I go to the local supermarket chains (Migros or Coop) to get a sandwich, some snacks, and a drink, which is around CHF 6-10 (about $7-$12). I end up spending about CHF 30-50 a week.

Nyon, Vaud

One of the main things that has kept me a bit uneasy is the constantly-changing list of public health requirements. On September 13, all individuals are required to have a Swiss COVID pass, which is a QR code showing that you are free from COVID and/or have been vaccinated. You need it to visit museums, bars, restaurants, and libraries, no exceptions. Fines are a heavy penny. To get a pass, you need to submit an application with your vaccination information, Swiss phone number, an ID (such as a passport) and your homestay address. You then answer a few questions. Because everyone has to do this now, application processing times are now several weeks long. You can get a temporary pass by taking a COVID test and having it be negative, but it is more convenient to just get the actual pass. The Swiss federal government became aware of these long waiting times, so it provided more guidance. Until October 10, you can enter venues, bars, restaurants, libraries, and museums using and ID (passport) and your vaccination card. This has relieved many of us as we can temporarily use this as we wait for our actual passes. Otherwise, many of the requirements on-campus at Bates are similar here: masks required in indoor areas and public transport, proof of vaccination or a negative COVID test taken 72 hours before entry, and adherence to these guidelines.

Castle on the French side of Lake Geneva (Yvoire, France)

On a similar note, the paperwork for the program (and arrival procedures) has been a lot. It is not as bad now, but in the beginning, I had to go to the local immigration office to register my arrival, fill out homestay paperwork, and then pay to process the information. We would be reimbursed that amount as long as we had a signature from the immigration staff confirming we went there and the receipt. Well, there were some issues with getting the signatures not just on my end, but with many of my peers as well. Our program staff realized this and instead made it so that if you only have the receipt, you can still get the reimbursement. If you have both, great, but for many of us, this was a tricky situation to navigate.

Swiss regional festival with lots of cows, traditional music, and awesome views

All of these things aside, I have definitely enjoyed it here. Even in my hometown, I can go to the lake and relax there or take a boat that goes across the lake to France. It is easy to move around here and to access lots of picturesque places. The photos above are from a regional festival 3 hours away where local farmers bring down their cows as the fall starts. It is very cool to witness. Afterwards, there is traditional music and lots of local food, such as sausages with fries, raclette (melted cheese), and of course, chocolate. I will close off by leaving you with one of my favorite moments of the trip so far: enjoying some Toblerone with the Matterhorn in view!

The iconic Matterhorn on the Toblerone chocolate!

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steamishot · 3 years

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july!

it’s been 4 days since i’ve been back to nyc - it’s always such an adjustment whenever i go home to LA and whenever i come back home to nyc. in LA, i have to get used to my family and friends again. i’m treated like a guest at home and my grandma and dad are supposedly on better behavior when i’m at home. i feel like it’s hard to get close to friends because my stay is only temporary and it would hurt to get too attached again. basically, the tables flipped and now that i��m doing an in person relationship with matt, i’m doing an LDR with family and friends. life at home is really easy, i can drive out whenever at any time of the day. i have normal work hours. i have friends and family all around me. i don’t have to do any of the cooking or housechores haha. it’s just overall fun and relaxing (at the expense of me feeling child-like and being overly pampered).

life out in nyc is rougher - it’s lonelier, a lot more work, and my time alone forces me to dwell on things that aren’t good for my mental health. i’m trying to steer this alone time into a positive direction, to continue working on and accomplish the goals i set out for myself. matt and i had a huge fight hours before my flight to nyc. we were apart for 3 weeks, and he was miserable by himself. i was doing great at home with my family. i feel like he was put under a lot of pressure (per usual in residency) and after the incident with his mom (having to choose sides between me and his mom) which resulted in a lot of tantrums on his part. he’s spent his entire life trying to please her and become a son she can be proud of, so i’m also feeling pressure to live up to her ideal expectations of me. as much as i try to understand where they are coming from and respect their culture, it also makes me feel sick. it could be my generational and western thinking, but what’s the point of saving face and holding a certain social status if you’re miserable? we’re in america and times are changing.

matt discusses how he wants to have a trip with me and his parents to paris in the fall. half of it is sweet because he perceives me as being part of the family, but i find that i now kinda dislike his mom and i’m not into the idea of being stuck on a trip with her again. after spending time with his family, i learned that all of matt’s bad traits actually come from his mom. and in her, the traits are amplified like 10x. his dad is pretty laid back and cooperative, so i enjoyed his company. but his mom can be scary and reminds me of my emotionally immature former boss. it was fine when we spent a few hours at a time together, or a day together. but the 5 days of 24/7 together was way too much. i know i’m very sensitive and not good at dealing with “difficult” people. i guess this is the part where i should learn to grow a thicker skin and maybe not give up so quickly.

H A W A I I R E C A P

matt was coming off two weeks of night shifts right before our flight back home. so basically, he came home at 7am after a 12 hr shift, slept for 3-4 hours and then woke up to do last min packing and leave for our walgreens covid testing. we took a lyft and kindly asked that the driver take us through the drive thru covid testing site before driving us to the airport. the process of getting covid tested (by a hawaiian authorized testing facility) and having results by a certain time, while catching flights in between was quite stressful. walgreens was the only place that offered rapid testing. there was one rapid location really close to JFK; the closest rapid test to LA is 4 hours away. i’m so happy that this process was seamless. we got our negative results a couple hours later. we flew home on june 1. had kbbq lunch with his family on june 2 and cambodian/vietnamese dinner with my family on the same day. we flew out to maui june 3 evening. keep in mind i was working through everything lol, as i only took 2 days off for my trip (in hawaii).

we arrived to maui thursday night. on friday, we went to a fancy but very touristy breakfast spot, did a 4 mile hike, and then went to a luau in the evening. all the luaus were marked up because of covid. the last two luaus i went to were about $80 and brought via groupon. this luau ($~130) was by far the nicest one i’ve gone too. the food was actually very impressive. on saturday, we went on a half day snorkeling cruise. i found it funny that the guy’s announcement revolved about etiquette on the boat and our itinerary, but like nothing regarding the actual snorkeling safety because it was kinda expected you knew how to swim/snorkel. i ended up snorkeling with a noodle and board. at the first stop, we saw some fishes, but they were quite deep. in the second stop, we got to swim next to turtles - it felt like finding nemo!

on sunday, we went to road to hana. by this day, we both were pretty tired, but matt was reallyyy tired. it’s a combination of having just worked night shifts/residency hours without proper rest time plus being fat. road to hana is nicknamed the divorce highway because the stress in driving through it has caused arguments among many couples. what i learned is that when he’s tired/stressed (even on vacation), fights will ensue. he’ll be snappy and i’ll get offended, and then he’ll apologize but i’ll hold a grudge, then he’ll get pissed and i’ll apologize. road to hana was really beautiful. i was disappointed because i was so looking forward to visiting the black sand beach, but didn’t know a reservation was needed to enter :( bad planning on my part. we were staying at a coastal resort, but our hotel was facing the mountain for the first 3 nights. matt asked the receptionist every day if there was an ocean view room available. we finally lucked out on this day and transferred to an ocean view room for our last night.

on monday, we woke up to an ocean view and just spent time at the hotel enjoying the scenery. later on, we went to the haleakala national park and got to be one with the clouds! we talked about how this trip basically tested our bodies in every way. first was the 4 mile hike, rated difficult. second was the snorkeling, getting past the fear of water and also dealing with some motion sickness. we both started feeling motion sickness on the boat after returning from the first snorkeling location. third was driving through the crazy road to hana. it has 620 curves and 46 one lane bridges. matt drove us in, and i drove us out so we both got to experience it. i must say - i’m a better driver under stress xD. LA driving prepared me well. lastly, the heleakala summit was at 10k feet above sea level. it was super windy up there and our body was dealing with the elevation/pressure differences.

i’m relearning that with traveling - it’s fun up until the itinerary gets too packed and consequently too tiring. same with eating. eating good food is great, up until you realize you over-ordered and then eating becomes a chore. between matt and i, we are relearning what each others limits are again. before residency, he had so much more energy during traveling. now his dream would just to be to lounge next to the beach (in his private room) and not have to do or think of anything. my daily life is not tiring so i have energy to expend when traveling. we are working on not over-ordering, so that we do not overeat and we do not overspend.

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laurelkrugerr · 4 years

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4 Ways to Turn Uncertainty into Strength for Your Business

How to find the silver lining in this situation and put your business in the best possible position.

April 6, 2020 7 min read

Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

It’s a tough time for all of us. Beyond making my kitchen table my new “office,” I found out last week that my kids will continue homeschooling until at least May 15. We’re navigating uncharted waters both personally and professionally. But as someone who started her first business in 2008 — sitting at the aforementioned kitchen table with the same kids at home — I’d be remiss not to share the silver lining. Yes, it’s challenging, particularly as the global economy plunges, but surviving and growing as a business can be done. I’m here to prove that again.

Some of you may not know that business ownership among female entrepreneurs grew dramatically during the Great Recession and afterwards. During this period (2007 to 2012), minority women-owned businesses saw the most dramatic growth. Hispanic women owned 26.5 percent more businesses in 2012 than they did in 2007, and African American women increased the number of businesses they owned by 20.2 percent during that same period. Looking at today’s economy, we’re situated in a much better place than we were in 2008. So can aspiring female business owners top these figures coming out of this crisis? I certainly think so.

Related: 11 Ways Emotionally Intelligent People Overcome Uncertainty

Those who own businesses are tightening their belts and restructuring, but I still think there are a few silver linings to be had out of all of this. Just as I clung to these silver linings when I launched my business in 2008, I’ll do the same now.

See this as a time to be aggressively imperfect.

For the first time in a long time, I’ve noticed people turning to social media to spread positivity and kindness. We’re connecting with each other on a human-to-human level, and many of the procedural and business etiquette rules we normally follow have gone out the window. Use this to your advantage.

You know the saying “Done is better than perfect”? There’s no better time than now to take that to heart. Ask yourself: What need do I fulfill? Then, find ways to meet that need. Right now, that might be something that’s different than what you normally do. Engage with your social media communities to ask what kind of support they’re looking for.

A woman business owner I mentor recently tweeted in response to an entrepreneur who was asking how he could get publicity for his business during this crisis period. They exchanged a few messages and are now in contract negotiations for her to handle his PR. Don’t be afraid to go after the people who need you most right now. It doesn’t have to be a perfectly designed business proposal. Generous, proactive support trumps perfection right now.

Use the constraints to bring you clarity.

I like to say that until your boat is sinking, it’s hard to know what to throw overboard. Right now, you have more clarity than ever about how you want to spend your time and money. Pay attention to what you realize you can toss aside in your business and use those constraints to your advantage.

Dr. Seuss famously wrote his best-selling children’s book Green Eggs and Ham using only 50 words after his publisher bet him he couldn’t do so. Constraints can direct us to make the best use out of what we already have. They hone our focus and make us concentrate on our business’ bottom lines. Despite the chaos going on in the world, I feel incredibly clear on my business and what needs to be achieved this month. My team knows exactly what we need to do to have a strong April.

Related: 7 Ways to Manage Uncertainty and Growth Simultaneously

This is an ideal time to follow the Pareto principle, also known as the 80/20 rule. Under this principle, 80 percent of your outcomes can be attributed to 20 percent of your input. For example, say that 20 percent of your clients bring in 80 percent of your sales. Using this theory, it’s better to spend time on those few vital tasks (the 20 percent) rather than the many trivial ones in order to maximize our output. Ask yourself: What are the vital components of my business? Which client can I not stand to lose? Which product or service brings in the most revenue? From there, your path should be clear.

Meet your customers where they are.

This is a time when you need to shift and adjust your offers. It’s not the time to dig in your heels on your current offer and refuse to budge. While the world is in the throes of this pandemic, now is the time to think of your legacy as a company and brand, not your short-term goals. Show up for people when they are struggling.

Many companies are generating positive word-of-mouth PR just by adjusting their offerings to support individuals and small businesses right now. A great example is Zencastr, a tool for remote podcasters. The company announced that now through July 1, it will be waiving the limits for those on its Hobbyist tier, which includes dropping limits on the number of recording hours and the number of participants each podcaster gets. Side note: If you’ve always wanted to start a podcast, it looks like the time is now.

Related: How to Embrace Uncertainty, and Create a Culture of Innovation

Do you offer an essential or much-needed service? Can you temporarily cut the costs or offer it for free? Can you take your offering and adjust it to help even more people? For example, my company offers productivity tools and trainings. In difficult times like now, when there’s so much to think about, I know how challenging it can be to maintain productivity. That’s why in addition to our comprehensive program launch in April, we came out with our Daily Momentum offering. For a low price, customers receive audio text messages from me each morning consisting of positive and motivational productivity tips for the day ahead. During a time of turmoil, you want your customers to remember you being there as a continual source of support. The worst thing you can do is turn the lights off completely and then come knocking when things have returned to normal.

Embrace the novelty as exercise for your brain.

For most of us, our days have an entirely new look and feel to them. Instead of being resistant to this novelty, try to lean into it. Research shows that changing up your routine encourages your brain to make new connections and neural pathways, a concept known as neuroplasticity. It sounds silly, but something as little as switching up the route you drive to work (or these days, the grocery store) can increase brain efficiency in problem-solving or discovering creative solutions.

Instead of stressing out over the change, embrace it and recognize it as something that’s good for you. Your brain needs to stay active, too. Like everything in life, it’s all about shifting your mindset to focus on the positive. Even though there’s a lot of negativity in the world right now, I hope you can implement these shifts to focus on the silver linings and strengthen your business. We will get past this.

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riichardwilson · 4 years

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4 Ways to Turn Uncertainty into Strength for Your Business

How to find the silver lining in this situation and put your business in the best possible position.

April 6, 2020 7 min read

Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

Related: 11 Ways Emotionally Intelligent People Overcome Uncertainty

See this as a time to be aggressively imperfect.

Use the constraints to bring you clarity.

Related: 7 Ways to Manage Uncertainty and Growth Simultaneously

Meet your customers where they are.

Related: How to Embrace Uncertainty, and Create a Culture of Innovation

Embrace the novelty as exercise for your brain.

Website Design & SEO Delray Beach by DBL07.co

Delray Beach SEO

source http://www.scpie.org/4-ways-to-turn-uncertainty-into-strength-for-your-business/ source https://scpie.tumblr.com/post/614677133556645888

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scpie · 4 years

Text

4 Ways to Turn Uncertainty into Strength for Your Business

How to find the silver lining in this situation and put your business in the best possible position.

April 6, 2020 7 min read

Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

Related: 11 Ways Emotionally Intelligent People Overcome Uncertainty

See this as a time to be aggressively imperfect.

Use the constraints to bring you clarity.

Related: 7 Ways to Manage Uncertainty and Growth Simultaneously

Meet your customers where they are.

Related: How to Embrace Uncertainty, and Create a Culture of Innovation

Embrace the novelty as exercise for your brain.

Website Design & SEO Delray Beach by DBL07.co

Delray Beach SEO

source http://www.scpie.org/4-ways-to-turn-uncertainty-into-strength-for-your-business/

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douglassmiith · 4 years

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Long Beach Beer Lab Could Have Closed; Instead They Became Essential

The story of how one small brewery and gastropub semi-pivoted on the fly and has been busier than ever.

April 2, 2020 7 min read

Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

Levi Fried barely has time to talk. “It’s never a good moment,” he concedes somewhat wearily. Along with his wife, Harmony Sage, the native Californian owns and operates three-year-old SoCal hotspot Long Beach Beer Lab. And despite the viral pandemic that has shuttered small businesses from coast to coast, Fried’s doors are open and he is, as he puts it, “busy as all get-out.” The reason? By mid-March, he and Sage saw the writing on the wall and temporarily rebranded themselves Long Beach Bodega Lab, semi-pivoting from microbrewery and gastropub to suds maker-meets-sundries store.

Thanks to a robust supply chain and some quick thinking, the duo has transformed literally overnight into a bustling enterprise that preps curbside pickup and socially distanced in-store orders of everything from growlers of sour ale to cartons of eggs and bags of rice. And they’ve been dutifully documenting and detailing the process in real time, down to guidance on customer etiquette, on their myriad social-media pages.

Related: For International Dominatrix Mistress Eva Oh, Business Is Booming

In between fulfilling customer requests for vital items and posting prodigiously on Instagram, Fried took a few minutes over the phone to fill us in on how and why he and Sage made the switch, whether it will stick and what it’s like to come home at the end of the day and consider the peculiarities of our shared cultural predicament.

Prior to the pandemic, functioning as part-grocery store was never on your radar, correct?

Right, absolutely. We were pizzas and beer, more experiential, and we had thesse items because of our kitchen and bakery and decided we could take our stock and put it out because we were seeing yeast and eggs were hard to get.

Did you realize right away you’d be fulfilling a need for scarce items?

We looked at a couple of things. One was that we’re very close with our community, so we reached out to find what the needs were. I’m also close with our councilman and took it upon myself to see what items [people] were seeking above and beyond what I knew my own family needed, what was not in the stores. The other part of this was we were looking at ways we could be essential and remain that way, and one of those things was to become a grocer.

Was that out of a need to serve the community, survive as a business or a bit of both?

I think it was a little bit of both. I’m not gonna say we’re 100 percent community driven, even though we have a huge community focus. But definitely, becoming essential was survival, along with community [benefits], which was really nice.

So what’s business like compared to before this outbreak?

We’ve been doing phenomenally. I honestly like this model even better than what we were doing. We’re doing on par I think. We had to shift around some people and make some changes, because we’re definitely not a to-go-order kind of place, and we had to get that infrastructure built. We’re not convenience-store-driven. We didn’t have any of those things built out, so there was a lot of learning to be done.

How have you been able to keep items like eggs and beans and yeast in stock?

We have a great relationship with our distributor, so we’re able to get things in bulk that other people are unable to get, especially when it comes to flour and milk and yeast and eggs, because we’ve been using them. So our distributor is rock-solid.

Is there a lesson there for all businesses about leveraging whatever relationships you have, even if it means rethinking your model?

I think there’s a couple of things that work out for us. One is we’re still selling beer and bread primarily as our main sellers, so we haven’t really moved away from that model. We’ve always loved the grab-and-go model. We own a coffee shop down the street, and it’s grab and go, and we’ve always liked that, “Here’s this amazing product. Take it and have your own experience with it.” It didn’t work out with the brewery when we started because it takes a bit of marketing agency to get that going. Now we have that down, and I think we will probably continue with this [bodega] model in some capacity and incorporate the brewpub back in when things happen. So I do believe there was a pivot, but not a pivot away from where our minds are.

Do you worry about having to reintroduce yourself when this subsides, or is that effectively already happening?

It’s happening right now with our Instagram posts and our social media, just the way we’ve embraced the community, so I believe we’ll continue to move in that direction and not go back to how we were doing business, because I do believe we have the potential to do even better business, especially when we start rolling out delivery. I think we’ll be OK, and we’ll just start to meld the two businesses together.

Survival aside, you have engendered community gratitude, so is that a win-win considering the circumstances?

One hundred percent. I think we’ve only ingrained ourselves in the community dialogue more, and a lot of people are going to come out and support the fact that we stepped up and didn’t close down or do whatever was routine for us. I already see that, and so I’m pretty confident we’re gonna see a continued success just because of who we are and what we’re doing and the new route we’ve taken and new embracing of the community that has happened. I’m busier than ever, and I only foresee getting busier.

But given the steep learning curve, how have you guys not panicked and froze?

[Laughs] I think it’s that we’ve always run a very nimble business where my wife and I are the head producers, and we’ve had such a solid team that’s been willing to work through difference scenarios. Having the producers as the owners allows us to step back and make changes. We have a crew that is gung-ho and supportive. And just good business practices from the onset, where we weren’t overstaffing and didn’t have a huge stock of things that were holding us back and were credit-free, debt-free, everything paid straight out. That’s helped us not have to worry about SBA loans and overhead. We’ve really been able to reinvent ourselves in this time due to the fact that we’re able to be agile as an organization and have a strong backbone where the owners aren’t just sitting behind a computer, but are making the products themselves. Since then, we’ve been able to go to our distributors and say, “Hey, our demand is up. Can we get some goodwill discounts on bulk or start to provide terms that are more favorable for a business that is pivoting?”

Related: New Stimulus Bill Unlocks IRA and 401(k) Dollars for Financially Affected

Have you had a chance to stop and be philosophical about the paradoxes of all this?

I don’t get a lot of time, but every time my wife and I come home and we’re beat up from the day, we’ll turn around and say, “You know how many businesses closed down today? And yet we remain open and potentially even more successful.” That paradox is humbling. We’re very fortunate. To continue baking and continue brewing in this climate is a blessing, and our eyes are open to that.

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trippinglynet · 5 years

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Burning Man: Been There, Burnt That | September 1997

BY RICK EGAN [Ed Note: Rick Egan continues to cover Burning Man as of 2019] THE SALT LAKE TRIBUNE BLACK ROCK DESERT, Nev. -- Each year, Burning Man starts over. Last Sunday night, the 40-foot wood and neon skeleton was stuffed with fireworks, doused with diesel and ignited by a real flaming man. More than 15,000 people gathered here over the Labor Day weekend at the Hualapai Playa for Burning Man 97, a festival of fire, art and self-expression.

``We never assigned a meaning to Burning Man,'' said founder Larry Harvey. ``It's come into full flower and realized its potential. It's more than an event. It is a movement, a phenomenon.''

To Samantha Nalo of Miami, Burning Man is a release ``to cleanse yourself, to get a fresh representation of who you are, where you are going and what you want to do next.'

The phenomenon started in 1986. Harvey and 11 friends built an 8-foot wooden man and torched it on a beach near San Francisco. ``The moment it was lit, our numbers tripled,'' Harvey said. ``What we had instantly created was a community.''

his year, that temporary community, Black Rock City, was 140 miles north of Reno, Nev., on 3 square miles of prehistoric lake bed.

`Strive to be unique, find yourself alone,'' was written on a sign carried by Sean Corvino, New Haven, Conn., also known as ``Yawnmower.'' Corvino wore a long-tailed red drum major's jacket as he circled the camp with a different sign every day.

Erica Muehsam married Keith Sullivan, attended by a dozen belly dancers, under the Burning Man Saturday night. As they descended the steps, they were squirted with shaving cream by painted and costumed people.

A pedi-cab whisked the newlyweds across the playa to Bianca's Smut Shack for their reception. The festival's theme was ``No spectators. Everyone is a participant.'' Nevadans who ignored camp etiquette by riding their motorized ATVs on the playa risked bonks on heads, as body-painted hackers whacked golf balls into the desert at Ras Baboos Driving Range, where clubs and balls were supplied free.

Wanda and Jaay Schmerber of Pyramid Lake, some curious Black Rock neighbors, paid $145 to drive over, park and take a look. Wanda, 57, said, ``It looks like a lot more fun than I thought. Next year we'll bring the motor home and stay. . . . It takes all kinds of people to make a world.''

Because Burning Man is a noncommercial event, participants must bring necessities for desert survival -- food, shelter, water, fuel. ``Together, you have to make a commitment, and you have to think about your survival, which is a first for many people,'' Harvey said. ``Not only does it put you in touch with nature, it puts you in touch with other people, because they are going through the same thing you are.''

At times, it seemed everything was on fire from a psychedelic whale spouting 10-foot flames to the 30-foot ring of fire created by a cage filled with steel wool and coffee creamer, spun on a rope. By late Sunday night, the 30-foot duck, the windmill and nearly everything else in camp that was combustible was in flames with people dancing and drums pounding.

The drumming never stopped. At night, the sound came from all directions as the drum circles played for the fire dancers.

With 15,000 desert dwellers, Black Rock City was the sixth largest city in Nevada for the weekend. Security and firefighters were increased drastically this year, and according to Mike Williams, Washoe County Sheriff's Department, ``We had less problems here than we had at the rodeo.''

``We are trying to re-create culture in our society, '' Harvey said. ``It takes three things to create this [culture]. First everybody needs to feel their own soul. Second, to feel that everyone around you is having the same experience, you need to be united with one another. And third, by being united with one another, you become something greater than yourself.

``Everyone is welcome to Burning Man. The only group we don't welcome is the intolerant, and they self-exclude.''

#Salt Lake Tribune #Rick Egan #Samantha Nalo #Sean Corvino #Yawnmower #Erica Muehsam #Keith Sullivan #Bianca's Smut Shack #Ras Baboos Driving Range #Jaay Schmerber #Wanda Schmerber #Mike Williams

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biofunmy · 5 years

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Bye-Bye, Bathroom Attendants? – The New York Times

On a recent Wednesday evening the small, tranquil four-stall bathroom at the “21” Club in Manhattan was free of patrons. Still, Pat Velasquez, 72, dressed in a black blazer and matching pants, and black and white printed silk shirt, stood by the sink, a white paper towel in her hand, ready for someone to enter. Eventually Mary Garrett, a first-time customer, did.

“I’ve not been in a restaurant that has an attendant in a long time,” Ms. Garrett said, looking pleasantly surprised. “The bathroom attendant is a thankless, antiquated job. You’re paying an employee to do something no one understands. This is very genteel. I can’t believe they have one.”

Ms. Velasquez makes $15 an hour and if she’s lucky, takes home an additional $15 to $20 in tips during a shift that lasts six and a half hours. (“21” also employs another attendant, Roseanne Huschle, who has been with the restaurant for 20 years.)

“It’s not easy, but it’s worth it. I’m a people person and you get to meet everyone — tourists and regulars,” Ms. Velasquez said. “The bathroom is the main part of everything. People cry in here. They lean on my shoulder. I’m like a psychiatrist. Sometimes they’re drunk and throw up. Or they come in and make private calls. Or they want to smoke and are disappointed that I’m here, so they can’t.”

Years ago, bathroom attendants were in demand: an essential accouterment to the high-end restaurant or nightclub experience. They often have overseen amenities like perfume, gum, mints, hair accessories, Q-Tips, sprays, even ear plugs for those who want to disregard the table conversation or found the music at a club too loud.

They remain an essential presence in certain department-store “ladies lounges,” where customers might pause with shopping bags that need guarding.

But like, well, department stores, “bathroom attendants have definitely faded,” said Lee Schrager, the founder of the South Beach Wine & Food festival in Miami. “Years ago, they were considered elegant. Now, some might find them creepy because they don’t want another person standing in there while they’re using the bathroom.”

Mr. Schrager did not say why this squeamishness has only emerged recently.

Cash Flow

Thomas Farley, also known as Mister Manners, an etiquette expert who teaches manners workshops around the country, has another theory. “A lot of people don’t carry cash anymore, and even if they do, they don’t feel the need to give someone a dollar to hand them a paper towel,” he said.

Mr. Farley pointed out as well that many establishments are installing gender-neutral bathrooms. “Some of these spots have attendants, but they’re more like air traffic controllers who tell you which stall is free to use,” he said. “They also make sure that the bathroom stays clean and that there’s no untoward behavior going on.”

Ms. Velasquez of “21” is in a different category. When business is slow, she stands outside the door, talks with customers and watches the restaurant traffic.

“I’ve known Pat as long as she’s worked here,” said Andrea Thurlow, a fashion designer and regular at the restaurant. “I love seeing her. We have a good relationship. I know about her personal life, we have a little chat. You need to have the right personality to do this job. Most attendants are rude. They just want their money, and that makes it uncomfortable. But not here.”

Theodore V. Suric, the general manager of “21,” said that its patrons come for the Prohibition Room, the toys on the ceiling, the jockey ornaments — and the bathroom attendants.

“We had one in the men’s room who was here for 25 years, but he died six years ago,” Mr. Suric said. “I tried replacing him, but I can’t find the right person to complement the position, the guests and the restaurant.”

According to Reneta McCarthy, a senior lecturer at the School of Hotel Administration at Cornell University, bathroom attendants today are rare. “Back in the day, you expected to see a bathroom attendant in a nice restaurant, and you would definitely tip him or her,” Ms. McCarthy said. “Now, you hardly see them, and if you do, there’s not that same compulsion to tip them.”

Ms. McCarthy said the role of attendant dates back to the mid- to late-19th-century in Europe, when fancy hotels and restaurants began opening throughout the continent. They became common at urban high-end hotels and restaurants in the United States in the early 20th century.

“Culturally as a society, we’re less formal today, and that puts attendants to the wayside,” she said.

Professional groups like the Hotel Employees and Restaurant Employees Union don’t monitor the number of bathroom attendants. But they are missing from a number of restaurants and clubs that formerly had them, like Balthazar and the Four Seasons Restaurant.

The Skylark, a new swanky cocktail bar in Midtown Manhattan, has an attendant for its gender-neutral restrooms, but management declined to be interviewed on the subject.

The Tums, They Are A-Changin’

There are some old holdouts besides “21.” Joe’s Stone Crab, the 100-year-old seafood restaurant in Miami, has had an attendant in the women’s restroom for at least a few decades, according to the general manager Brian Johnson.

“They may not be as appreciated as they once were because we’re a lot less formal now, but they’re still nice to have,” Mr. Johnson said.

The current two attendants, Iris Cedillo and Margarita Romero, have worked at Joe’s for more than 20 years. When Ms. Romero started in 1995, her job primarily involved pumping scented lotion onto women’s hands and helping them with Tums or a soda if they got sick.

But the amenities that the restaurant provides (lotion, tampons, toothpicks and individually wrapped chocolate mints) have been somewhat pared down. So are the tips she receives.

“I used to make $20 a night, now the most I’ll get is $10,” Ms. Romero said through a translator. “Women tell me how friendly I am and how clean the bathroom is, but that doesn’t mean more tips.”

Inebriated patrons have also been known to steal amenities, some of which are purchased by employees.

“People take the perfumes so we don’t leave those out anymore,” Ms. Velasquez said. “We used to keep the lotion out, but someone broke the bottle. It’s in a plastic container and it doesn’t look nice. But if anyone needs hair spray, Advil, bobby pins, tampons, a hair dryer or curling iron, I have those. People just need to ask, and most do.”

Shareef Malnik, the president and chief executive of the Forge Restaurant and Wine Bar, a steakhouse in Miami Beach that opened in 1968, has kept attendants and their lavish offerings in both his men’s and women’s restrooms. (The Forge is temporarily closed for renovations.)

Items are displayed on marble trays or in raised crystal bowls and woven baskets. They include a half dozen expensive perfumes and colognes, like Tom Ford Noir for men and Viktor & Rolf Flowerbomb for women.

Men can try shave butter, Spearmint and Big Red gum, Tums, Altoids and mouth wash; women can expect hair ties, hair spray, Trident gum, cocoa butter, Evian facial spray and makeup remover.

“I feel like it’s pampering my diners to have attendants,” Mr. Malnik said. “We’re old-school that way.”

Max Sylvestle has worked as an attendant in the men’s room at the Forge for the last five years. “Men come in and are so surprised at all the fun stuff I offer them,” he said. “They all love using the Tom Ford cologne and are also really into the gum.”

Most tip him a $1, but some give him $10. On a typical night, Mr. Sylvestle collects $120 in tips.

And Timothy Butler, owner of A Royal Flush, a company that provides upscale portable bathrooms for events in New York, New Jersey and Connecticut such as charity galas, golf tournaments and weddings, said that even though restaurants and nightspots may be cutting back, attendants remain an essential part of his business.

“Of the 300 or so events we are hired to do a year, the overwhelming majority involve attendants,” Mr. Butler said. Indeed, he said that compared with a decade ago, “they’re much more popular today. Maybe it’s because people realize that they add a touch of class.”

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lady-poppy-verona-blog · 6 years

Text

hell is where i dreamt of you and woke up alone

“i miss the ocean, and i know it’s weird to say. i grew up there, moved to l.a.”

((aka, challenge one. mentions of @nathaniel-schreave, @mistylane059, @sailor-shone and probably others but i’m tired. title and quote creds to blackbear))

🌸

this not what she wants.

she wants to go through the selection without dealing with the chaos of old loves, attractive loves, loves she still loves. instead, she gets to deal with seeing her ex boyfriend in the place she went to get over him.

she breathes out a quiet “andrew” and power walks over to him- it’s not as if she can run in these pretty jeweled heels they’ve put her in. he looks handsome in his uniform, professional and mature. his hair isn’t tidy, but it never was. he glances over, flushing when he realizes it's her.

“poppy?” he moves to run his hand through his hair, an old nervous habit, before letting it fall to his side to maintain his appearance. “what-what are you doi…” he trails of as he realizes. “right… you were selected.” he’s obviously not happy about this, almost as if he didn’t want her to show up at all.

poppy frowns at him. “it’s almost as if you don’t want me here at all. sorry, pal, but i’m here now, so you’re gonna have to get over it.”

he winces at the word ‘pal’. “you’re right, p, i don’t want you here. i just want to do my job and get out.” he turns and starts to walk away.

“if i had known you were here, i wouldn’t have signed up,” she calls after him.

“then i guess neither of us want to see each other then,” he responds before turning a corner.

she makes a frustrated noise before turning around and thinking about her words. if i had known you were here, i wouldn’t have signed up. a total lie, obviously, but it was what she wants-no, needs- to believe to keep herself sane while she’s here. a girl- misty lane, if she remembers correctly- is walking towards her. they had talked so loud, and so many things could be insinuated. “you didn’t hear any of that, right?”

misty opens her mouth, a confused look on her face, when another voice comes from behind them. “hear what?” she glanced behind her as a younger girl walks over to them.

“no,” says misty curiously. “you’re poppy right? and sailor?”

sailor looks over at misty, almost as if she hadn’t noticed them before. “oh, um, i am. you are?”

“misty of waverly. nice to meet you! i love your name btw.” this girl is so excited, it’s almost excruciating. poppy has never been one to be overly happy, and tends to get annoyed by people like that. suffer through, she tells herself.

sailor smiles shyly. “sailor moon, right?”

“i live for sailor moon!”

poppy tries her best to break into the conversation by being a total loser. “sorry, resident linguistics nerd,” she starts with a bit of a laugh. “it’s odd that your last name is in past tense, isn't it? where does that trace back to?” she says before realizing that hey nerd, not everyone is into etymology. “unless you don't know, which makes a lot more sense. sorry, that was an odd question.”

sailor takes it in stride, bless her. “good question. i have no clue, actually. it's my mother's last name. my father took her name.”

“same with my last name, lane,” misty says.

poppy shrugs. “verona is from my dad, otherwise i'd be poppy mendoza.” a terrifying prospect.

the conversation begins to only revolve around sailor and misty, so poppy quietly excuses herself before a maid catches her eye. the maid rushes over to her, looking relieved. “lady poppy, i’m caroline. i’m your head maid, and i’m here to escort you to your room.”

“oh, it’s fine caroline. i know what hall it is, i’m sure i can find the room from there,” poppy says, flushing slightly. “why don’t you take a few hours off?” poppy doesn’t want to walk with this girl- not only is she still unsettled by the interaction with andrew, she’s a little pissed that she hadn’t been involved in the conversation between the other two selected.

also, caroline is fine as hell. as in, this level of attractiveness should be illegal. she’s all bright eyes, a careful and beautiful smile, pretty hair twisted into a neat braid wrapping around her head. “my lady, i’m sorry, but miss corinne-my boss- would like me too.” she brushes the front of her skirt with her hands. “if you would please follow me, i can get you there in a jiffy.”

poppy gives up and nods. at least she can walk with someone pretty. she mumbles that a jiffy is actually a sixtieth of a second, so you can’t do anything in a jiffy, but follows her without complaint. they enter her hall, noticing that she’s rather close to the stairs, before they finally get to her room. caroline opens the door revealing two more maids standing at attention in a gorgeous, yet rather sparse, room. “this is marissa,” caroline says, gesturing to a tall blonde woman, “and laurel,” her arm moving over toward a skinny, curly haired girl who doesn’t look much older than 16. they both curtsy and murmur something along the lines of “my lady.”

poppy already hates this. everytime someone calls her “lady poppy” she feels like a stuck up bitch. she’s not famous (well, she is, but still), and she’s only one caste above these ladies. she wants to tell them to just call her poppy, but she knows that it’s probably going to be “unladylike” or whatever. she can deal with it.

that’s what she’s going to tell herself his entire process, honestly. she just hopes she can keep to it.

🌸

she didn’t realize how absolutely boring etiquette could be (although she loves that word).

lady collette, a pretty woman who was introduced as a former selected (and jace’s mother), has been put in charge of making sure the selected behave themselves and don’t embarrass their country if foreign dignitaries visit.

as she talks on and on about manners and curtsies, poppy gazes out the window, starving for a more interesting activity and breakfast.

the “more interesting activity” ends up being interviews with prince nate. one by one, the girls are sent to a secluded corner to talk to him, and pretty much all of them come back smiling and giggling. poppy sits in on conversations and contributes a little before she’s called over.

nate stands up as she approaches, giving her a small bow. “hello lady poppy, i'm prince nate.”

way to state the obvious, dude. poppy gives a slight curtsy. “salve, prince nate. how are you today?”

“i'm doing great and how are you?”

she smiles slightly. its pretty much impossible to tell the guy she’s supposed to be here to win that she’s only there to forget about an ex. “i'm doing pretty well myself. a bit of a culture shock, but overall pretty good.”

he gives her a curious glance. “what's so dramatically different for you?”

she shrugs. “i think the biggest thing is the environment. i'm so used to walking five minutes to the beach, and now it's a half hour drive from here. plus, i miss my family and friends, but an old friend of mine is actually a guard here, so that helps a little bit.” an old friend? that’s one way to put it.

“oh, who is he?”

“oh, um…” she trails off, not quite expecting a question about it. “his names andrew, andrew moore. he's only been here for a few months, though.”

“oh, i've heard his name before,” nate says with a bit of a smile.

“really?” she’s a little surprised. “that's interesting. is he high ranking or something? he doesn't really talk much about this job.”

“i'm not sure,” he says. “walking around the palace and hearing guards talk to one another, you pick up on all their names.”

she needs to change the subject. “that makes a lot more sense. this is a weird question, but i’m really interested in languages and linguistics. do you speak any foreign languages?” she didn’t need to be a fucking /loser/, but a subject was a subject.

“yeah, i can speak a little spanish and quite a bit of italian. i know phrases of others, but i can't speak them.” he gives her a gentle smile.

“i’ve always wanted to learn italian,” she says thoughtfully. “it’s very close to spanish and latin, so it would be pretty easy for me to learn.”

“are you, like, very into languages and such?” he asks, seeming like he’s actually interested.

“yeah!” poppy says excitedly. “my mom speaks four languages and passed on most of those to me. i grew up pretty much trilingual, and started learning latin and welsh afterwards.” she smiles. this is something she enjoys, unlike talking about her friends. languages have always been something she likes.

he looks impressed. “wow, trilingual. never heard that one before.”

she lists them, counting on her fingers. “english, portuguese, spanish. i kind of needed to know spanish, because most of the sevens and eights in honduragua only speak that, and portuguese for my mom’s family. some of them don’t speak english, or its very broken.”

he chuckles. “i couldn't be able to keep track of all that.”

“i do tend to switch languages in the middle of a sentence sometimes,” she starts with a laugh, “but it's fun for me. they’re all so different, but welsh is the most fun.”

“welsh,” he says with a chuckle. “that's not one i would've expected.”

he glances over to the other girls. “sorry, but i have quite a few more girls to meet, this conversation has been wonderful.” he stands up.

she stood as well. “it's been great talking to you, eich uchelder.” she walks back to the seats with a waggle of her fingers. she’s absolutely starving. there’s a bunch of girls left, and she cannot wait for breakfast.

when that finally arrives, she’s only a few seats away from the royals. it flies by as girls whisper excitedly about their interviews and the attractive guards they’ve seen. a table away, she heard someone mention an officer moore, but as soon as she tunes in, the conversation shifts topics. she goes back to the conversation surrounding her, participating half heartedly.

🌸

it’s been three days since the interviews. they’ve been entertaining themselves in the women’s room, but god, she’s bored stiff. all there is to do is watch tv, or read, or, god forbid, talk to people. she needs to get out of there before she starts nerding out over latin roots or something.

as she walks to the powder room (even the selected need to pee), she’s pulled aside by a head of red hair and a guard uniform.

“we need to talk,” andrew whispers quietly. “soon.”

poppy nods, responding with “seven pm. my room,” before letting out a delicate laugh and saying, “why, officer, aren’t you a smart one? i can see why they would offer you a job here.” she makes her way back to the women’s room, ready to sit through the boring, repetitive conversations and old drama over and over again and waiting to see andrew.

and see him she did. she had told her maids that she had a bad headache and needed to be alone, getting the room all to herself after lunch. she reads and subconsciously counts the hours until it’s time.

running about three minutes late as usual, he finally shows up, closes the door, and sits down on her bed as she sits up, putting pillows behind her to prop up her back. “sorry i’m late.”

“it’s fine,” she responds, trying to sound casual even though she’s panicking on the inside. “what did you want to talk about?”

“well, i… fuck, i don’t know. it’s hard to explain. it’s just… god i missed you, poppy.” his face is so close to hers. she’d only have to lean over slightly to kiss him like she wants to, to go back to the way they were before july.

“i missed you too. why are you telling me this now, instead of before i signed up for this?” she asks him, a little angry but mostly excited that he’s still into her.

“because i couldn’t apologize for being such an asshole. i’m sorry, p, i didn’t want to hurt you.” he leans closer and suddenly they’re the way they used to be, fitting together almost perfectly, her arms draping over his neck and his fingers digging into her hips as she straddles him.

it’s not as though they mean to go as far as they do, but when there’s an intense romantic reunion going on, typically sex is involved. she wakes up the next morning alone, however, which would make sense considering he probably has guard-ly duties or whatever. she manages to yank herself out of bed and into the shower, blushing and giggling, and in the back of her mind, panicking.

she never notices that it didn’t feel right, that he isn’t the one, that now that she’s here, she doesn’t want him like that anymore. but god knows, poppy is a stubborn bitch, when it comes to feelings and actions, and she’s never going to admit that they’re not going to be together forever.

she’s in for a cruel awakening.

#x. challenges #selectionoc

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laurelkrugerr · 4 years

Text

Long Beach Beer Lab Could Have Closed; Instead, They Became Essential

The story of how one small brewery and gastropub semi-pivoted on the fly and has been busier than ever.

April 2, 2020 7 min read

Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

Related: For International Dominatrix Mistress Eva Oh, Business Is Booming

Prior to the pandemic, functioning as part-grocery store was never on your radar, correct?

Did you realize right away you’d be fulfilling a need for scarce items?

Was that out of a need to serve the community, survive as a business or a bit of both?

So what’s business like compared to before this outbreak?

How have you been able to keep items like eggs and beans and yeast in stock?

Is there a lesson there for all businesses about leveraging whatever relationships you have, even if it means rethinking your model?

Do you worry about having to reintroduce yourself when this subsides, or is that effectively already happening?

Survival aside, you have engendered community gratitude, so is that a win-win considering the circumstances?

But given the steep learning curve, how have you guys not panicked and froze?

Related: New Stimulus Bill Unlocks IRA and 401(k) Dollars for Financially Affected

Have you had a chance to stop and be philosophical about the paradoxes of all this?

Website Design & SEO Delray Beach by DBL07.co

Delray Beach SEO

source http://www.scpie.org/long-beach-beer-lab-could-have-closed-instead-they-became-essential/ source https://scpie1.blogspot.com/2020/04/long-beach-beer-lab-could-have-closed.html

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riichardwilson · 4 years

Text

Long Beach Beer Lab Could Have Closed; Instead, They Became Essential

The story of how one small brewery and gastropub semi-pivoted on the fly and has been busier than ever.

April 2, 2020 7 min read

Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

Related: For International Dominatrix Mistress Eva Oh, Business Is Booming

Prior to the pandemic, functioning as part-grocery store was never on your radar, correct?

Did you realize right away you’d be fulfilling a need for scarce items?

Was that out of a need to serve the community, survive as a business or a bit of both?

So what’s business like compared to before this outbreak?

How have you been able to keep items like eggs and beans and yeast in stock?

Is there a lesson there for all businesses about leveraging whatever relationships you have, even if it means rethinking your model?

Do you worry about having to reintroduce yourself when this subsides, or is that effectively already happening?

Survival aside, you have engendered community gratitude, so is that a win-win considering the circumstances?

But given the steep learning curve, how have you guys not panicked and froze?

Related: New Stimulus Bill Unlocks IRA and 401(k) Dollars for Financially Affected

Have you had a chance to stop and be philosophical about the paradoxes of all this?

Website Design & SEO Delray Beach by DBL07.co

Delray Beach SEO

source http://www.scpie.org/long-beach-beer-lab-could-have-closed-instead-they-became-essential/ source https://scpie.tumblr.com/post/614312641729576960

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scpie · 4 years

Text

Long Beach Beer Lab Could Have Closed; Instead, They Became Essential

The story of how one small brewery and gastropub semi-pivoted on the fly and has been busier than ever.

April 2, 2020 7 min read

Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

Related: For International Dominatrix Mistress Eva Oh, Business Is Booming

Prior to the pandemic, functioning as part-grocery store was never on your radar, correct?

Did you realize right away you’d be fulfilling a need for scarce items?

Was that out of a need to serve the community, survive as a business or a bit of both?

So what’s business like compared to before this outbreak?

How have you been able to keep items like eggs and beans and yeast in stock?

Is there a lesson there for all businesses about leveraging whatever relationships you have, even if it means rethinking your model?

Do you worry about having to reintroduce yourself when this subsides, or is that effectively already happening?

Survival aside, you have engendered community gratitude, so is that a win-win considering the circumstances?

But given the steep learning curve, how have you guys not panicked and froze?

Related: New Stimulus Bill Unlocks IRA and 401(k) Dollars for Financially Affected

Have you had a chance to stop and be philosophical about the paradoxes of all this?

Website Design & SEO Delray Beach by DBL07.co

Delray Beach SEO

source http://www.scpie.org/long-beach-beer-lab-could-have-closed-instead-they-became-essential/

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