#i cry how nothing ever fucking changes in this country lol

[kimmkitsuragi]

i think my brain is catching up with. everything. just now

[vesora]

Hi hun, I'had been preparing for an uni entrance, basically it's one of the top uni in the country and I'm/was aiming for that. I've been living in the end, accepting that my desire is already done. Everything is already done and dusted lol but today when I had the entrance exam, I started having doubt? After looking at the questions lol like something kept telling me that I won't be able to get admission there etc etc. And now I basically fucked the exam. Idk what to do. Should I continue to live in the state knowing I didn't do good? Idk what to do lol. All I'm doing is cry cry. Pls reply. Thanks

hey love!

it appears your ego was trying to distract you from your true power which is I AM. nothing can ever beat I AM.

it doesnt matter what happened in the past. saturate your mind with the fact that you have passed. believe in yourself. believe that you are the only one who can have any influence on your experiences and reality. life listens to you, not the other way around.

you can do sats, affirm or do whatever that makes sure you know you have it because you do already! it's set in stone, because you said so.

if you want something to happen, then it must happen because you are meant to fulfill all your desires. see it in your inner mind. the acceptance letter that you have already passed. change your concept from "i didnt do good" to "i aced it!!" and reality will reflect exactly that. it doesnt matter how you think you did in the exam, your subconscious will move mountains if it means that you get what you want in the end.

dont cry, please. it's done. you have already passed. congrats on your acceptance, anon!

[heyimboredtalktome]

Can you please explain to me where do you get all those crazy ideas? Also do you know that medals taken away in 2014 are still getting returned to a lot of athletes? After 8 years this circus is still on. I don’t see this being covered in the media, but I speak Russian and see a completely different thing. If some other country had Eteri and those medals would be theirs, nothing of this would have happened. This is sickening!

horribly untrue lol:

1) the crazy ideas are from international news channels (BBC, NBC, CNN etc etc) from an official statement by the ITA the WADA. Get your ass off sports.ru, goldenskate and TASS and maybe learn to actually watch the news and you can also get these correct crazy ideas 💞

no medals being taken away from athletes competing in sochi 2014 have been returned because they were literally exposed for state-sponsored doping

the reason they haven't been competing as russia in these past three olympics is because of that, because they're fucking notorious for doping, because they get warning after warning and they're still caught doping

"not being covered in the media" this has become a topic of conversation in countries where most people don't even know about figure skating, that's the amount of media coverage this is getting

you see a completely different thing because thats what russia wants you to see, their state-sponsored state run news channels and their propaganda

if this happened to any other athlete or country, they would already be banned and suspended, RUSFED and ROC have some nerve, its illegal for kamila to be on olympic ice rn while an investigation is being conducted, yet she's there practicing like nothing's happening, thats how much leeway the ROC is getting, even when they're banned for doping and they've been caught doing that again

and yes it is sickening, its sickening that there are skaters who are being denied their rightful team medal just because the playing ground is never level, because a country that refuses to ever play fair, the country that's doping children. it's sickening that so many athletes have been denied their rightful podium places, their medals and recognition because of athletes with an unfair advantage. all athletes who are now injured trying to chase unrealistic unattainable standards to have a chance to compete with the russians. its fucking sickening

y'all need to realize that every time russia gets caught cheating, its not western propaganda, its that they refuse to stop it. got banned from the olympics? make the doping smarter, timed more efficiently, get new drugs instead of the old ones, and if you're not allowed to participate, send a crying 17 year old to an IOC conference asking for them to not deny her her dream of performing at the olympics. this is happening again and again anf agains because the IOC refuses to take action against Russia, they dont give a fuck if they don't get their flag or anthem, what they care about is their medals, and if that means dopo to children then so be it.

if the ioc allows them to get away with this its just sending a signal to others thats screaming "hey dope ur kids we cant do shit because they're minors, they'll be allowed to participate while having an unfair advantage over other athletes" BUT that only happens when you're russian, any other country gets banned on the mere suspicion of doping so there's literally no way you can win if you're not russian🥰 so much for fair sport

i know a lot of the russian people dont support this, more than the country the people should be blamed, the people in charge of all this, of ruining literally uncountable lives

if the ioc wants to force change they need to get stricter even if there are russian athletes that are clean, dont let them participate, stop with the fucking neutral flag it ain't doing shit, and they won't stop unless they're literally not allowed to participate at this point

[girlgrouptrash101]

Lisa (Blackpink) as Your Girlfriend

Request: “HEADCANON’s are my thing. Can I request Lisa as your girlfriend, please?”

A/N: lovesick girls SOTY,,, that’s all i have to say

- C

Get ready to be treated like royalty,, miss manoban won’t settle for anything less when it comes to her baby

Lisa is always romantic, whether its taking you our for a candle-lit, romantic dinner or just staying at home and slow dancing around the living room together

Your guys’ apartment would be the perfect blend of both your tastes, with a gorgeous, retro, red jukebox in the living room that you and Lisa play music from whenever you’re at home

You have a big photograph wall in your room of all the memories you’ve had together,, with most of the pictures being taken by your very own personal photographer Lisa hehe

her camera goes everywhere with her, and she has millions of photos of you that you’ve never even seen, as Lisa loves to keep them to herself so she can look through them when she’s away and misses you

the rest of the pinks are basically your best friends, and they basically knew you before they even met you, thanks to Lisa’s constant gushing over how amazing you are and how lucky she is to be with you :’]

you’re always invited to their shows and concerts,,, and the absolute joy you get seeing all Lisa’s fans scream for her knowing she all yours at the end of the day simply cannot be put into words

on long days before comebacks, you often find yourself heading to Blackpink’s practice room with snacks in hand, reminding the girls to stop overworking themselves and put their health first!

Lisa always teaches you her new dances, even if you have two left feet lol

she loves watching you learn, and after a few months she’s really helped you improve - even if most of you lessons end up to you and her dancing to crazy frog around the practice room like maniacs

the most fun dates!! Like one time you and Lisa went to every single ice cream parlour in your city and reviewed each one to find out which one had the best ice cream around

like YES you were both stuffed and couldn’t touch ice cream for about a month after because you hadn’t recovered... but it was still worth it

the two of you also love to pack a picnic and a blanket, taking a drive out to the big fields in the country side

there’s nothing else around you for miles, just you, Lisa and the sound of birds as they fly by and nest in trees, the two of you just enjoying the blissful break from city life

Plus you get to make daisy chains and talk about the most random things as you lounge on the blanket you packed, completely at ease with life and with one another

you love talking to Lisa so much; your conversation can honestly range from questioning the creation of humanity to talking about your favourite flavour of ice cream (mint choco team rise up)

she always does that little thing with her thumb when she holds your hand, rubbing her thumb ever so softly across the back of your hand and it makes your heart go dsfjksskl

gives the BESTEST hugs ever omg

her head rests on top of yours as she loops her arms around her waist and yours drape around her shoulders, your head against her chest or on her shoulder as she holds you tight against her

also gives A+ cuddles too, she’s like your own personal teddy bear that you can just never pull away from,,, she’s too warm and soft,, you always end up spending hours in her arms whenever you can

INTENSE JUST DANCE BATTLES IN THE LIVING ROOM

rumour has it you almost broke your knees trying to beat Lisa at the rasputin dance - spoiler alert, she still won like she always does jndsfdklds

shopping dates!! which are actually really fun,, Lisa always picks out something for the both of you that’s absolutely ABSURD, and when you go and try it on the two of you end up cracking up with laughter

don’t tell anyone but half the time when Lisa buys clothes for herself she goes for things that you would like in hopes that you borrow them off her... because YOU... in HER CLOTHES... she might just cry uwu

dating Lisa and accidentally becoming a parent to all FOUR of her cats.. good luck i guess xoxo

she loves taking you to Thailand to meet her family, and bringing you to all her favourite spots as a child, wanting to make new memories there with you by her side

she’s also one to show up on your doorstep with two plane tickets and a suitcase packed for you - she doesn’t even tell you where you’re going, but she always has a plan and brings you on the most memorable and life changing trips around the world

she just wants to make so many memories with you and switch things up when you least expect; Lisa loves to keep you on your toes

plus,,,, more memories = more stories to tell your kids when you get to that milestone in the future

which Lisa definitely sees happening, she’s never, ever leaving you behind, it would be a crime to lose a love as strong as yours.

NSFW From Here:

kind of a service top tbh,,, like this girl just wants her baby to be feeling good and satisfied

will have her way with you any time any place though,, like she always catches you so off guard - you could be just cooking dinner and then all of a sudden she’s crept up behind you and her hand is down your pants

“and I’ll do it again” - Lisa after eating you out on the kitchen counter top x

It drives her fucking insane when you moan out her name, and it only spurs her on to fuck you harder and faster, listening to each heavenly scream spill from your lips

less into sending you nudes and more into sending you steamy choreographies that she’d been practicing just for you

Lisa feels the best when she’s dancing, and she knows just how worked up you get when you watch her dancing to something sexy, so she never hesitates to invite you to the practice room when she knows she’s going to be putting on a show

which usually ends up with you against the practice room mirror, begging for Lisa to go harder and harder - probably scaring away everyone else in the YG building </3

definitely has a rainbow coloured strap on because gay rights 

tbh you couldn’t care less what colour it is - you don’t even know anything except Lisa’s name when she’s using it, each thrust driving you closer and closer to that glorious edge

Lisa absolutely LOVES when you take care of her too, especially after a long day of schedules when she just gets to come home and ride your face until she crashes from tiredness

her favourite thing in the world is getting eaten out, her long legs wrapping around your head to keep her close to her core while her head is thrown back in pleasure

i could definitely see her being into wax play too, mainly because she think its so gorgeous,, the hot wax melting onto your skin and creating a beautiful picture on her favourite canvas

Lisa in thigh high boots......... and deep red lingerie........... thinking so many thoughts

absolutely LOVES receiving/sending nudes, and she saves every single one in a locked folder for her to look back on when she’s busy on tour and missing your touch 

and don’t be surprised if you get a facetime call in the middle of the night, filled with Lisa’s whines and moans as she touches herself over the phone, driving you crazy knowing you can’t be there to please her the way she so clearly desires

[sweetestlamb]

Let's Play A Love Game

Author's note: this one is rated 😈 so yeah. There was originally more angst in my mind but once I got to that part I was over it lol I'm the worst at angst I much rather make it naughty. It's more rushed than I wanted but I don't really have time to write 10k fics right now. But hopefully soon.

Summary: it's just pretend, right?

She hadn't meant to push the event in the corner of her mind until she forgot about it completely, so much so that when the e-vite showed up in her inbox she stared at it in wide eyed shock not even noticing Mi-Seon creeping up behind her.

"It's already time for that? I usually know it's coming because you start buying expensive dresses you can't afford and crying at your credit card bill. Maybe country life has really changed you hm?"

False. Inaccurate. Utterly wrong to the every core.

She lets out a shrill scream letting her head fall painfully on her desktop.

"I'm an idiot! Just kill me now, I deserve it." She has nothing to wear, okay the mountain of boxes in her living room, bedroom and some hidden in the linen closet beg to defer but none of that is worthy of this event. The annual dentist convention in Seoul, it's a week long getaway. It's meant to be an opportunity to build connections and attend professional learning classes, but that has long been abandoned. Now it is a fashion show and chance to show off your success and this year more than ever she has to impress everyone. They all look down on her and her cute little practice. Those judgemental snarky bitches.

"Do we have anymore patients?" She absently asks her best friend, only friend already getting up and walking away.

"No that was the last one. Do you want to call it a day?" She doesn't give a verbal reply lost in her phone and the disease that is online shopping, in the span of three minutes she has already added seven dresses to her cart.

"Chief Hong is going to have a long day."

It's just as Mi-seon says the next day the nosy know it all shows up glaring at her over the handful of packages in his arms.

"Don't tell me you're doing this again. What more could you possibly have to order? How much things does one woman need?" His voice is an air warmer than the last time they were in this very same position, but she tries not to think too hard about it. Their relationship is too confusing these days, as temperamental as the sea.

"Are delivery men allowed to complain this much when they're doing a job they are getting paid for?" She snarks back, snatching her packages from his arms with a huff. Ignoring the grin on his face as she disappears into her house.

"That better be all you order. I'm not coming back."

He comes back. At least six more trips, more boxes each time on the last day he doesn't simply leave after making his delivery.

"I'm coming in for tea because of you I've been working too hard." She squeaks indignantly as he pushes past her, their shoulders brushing in the tight space of the doorway.

She should wait until she doesn't have an audience but she's too impatient so while he's making the tea in her kitchen (so rude and intrusive), she starts to open a few boxes pulling out the contents. Dresses, blouses, shirts, hair accessories, lipsticks in all shades and hues, and of course shoes; heels, flats and everything in between.

"Your house looks like a department store." She jumps at his voice glancing up at him, almost laughing at the hedgehog mug that he's drinking out of that Mi-seon gave her as a joke. Leave it to him to pick the most ridiculous mug.

"Hurry up and go so I can try everything on." She starts to take the objects out and organize them, putting together possible outfits lazily.

"Why not have a fashion show?" He slurps loudly at the tea, sighing and smiling down at the warm beverage. Acting like he's never had tea before, such a plebian.

"A fashion show?"

"Yeah, model all that", he motions to the new boxes littering her bedroom floor, "and I'll let you know what looks good."

She scoffs, loudly looking at his lackluster outfit; a simple white tee tucked into dark cargo pants with suspenders.

"What do you know about fashion?" She replies meanly, despite the little voice in her mind that reminds her that while his outfits are more practical than fashionable there is something distracting about the way his shoulders fill out his shirts and the way his long legs sit in his pants.

He shrugs looking down at himself, "I'm the town handy man I have no need to look good. But I'm still a man I can tell you what I think looks good on a woman."

Oh. It's a nonchalant statement said with no real heat but the implications make her skin warm up, she's never once thought that he saw her as a woman; nor considered looking at him like a man. (Lies.)

"I--why woul--why?" She stutters through an answer, tongue heavy in her mouth. He looks back nonplussed, sitting down pointedly on her couch.

"Never took you for the shy kind. You growing bashful now Ms. Dentist?" His eyes twinkle with mischief and she knows that she's being played but she wants nothing more than to wipe that smug look off his face. Slamming her room door, she pulls off her casual house clothes and grabs the first thing that catches her attention- a buttery yellow dress that grazes her knee, pairing them with white heels and a high messy bun. A swipe of lip tint completes the look and she confidently opens her room door.

Du-sik is staring aimlessly at his phone and doesn't notice her reappearance at first, so she coughs loudly folding her arms and when his eyes land on her, a chill runs down her spine at the look that lands on her body. It's been a long time since a man looked at her in this way, his eyes are undressing her even though he was the one who implored her to dress up in the first place. She hates it. At least she should hate it. But she can't ignore the satisfaction that washes over her at his dumbfounded look, that smug look obliterated by her very first look.

"Well?" She pushes harder, twirling to give him the full look. His gasp is loud behind her, she knows exactly why. The deep revealing plunge that travels all the way to the small of her back. There's no way she would wear this to the convention much too suggestive but that's her business.

"Wher-" his voice cracks and this time she can't contain her smile, dimples flashing now at her clear affect on him, clearing his throat he tries again, "Where exactly are you going again?"

She hums turning back around, gleeful at the vibrant blush on his cheeks. So he is just a man after all.

"A dentist convention." She answers cheekily and he guffaws loudly, eyes narrowing at her like he knows exactly what she's trying to do. They stare at each other for a long moment and she ultimately breaks the stand still, realizing what's happening. It feels a lot like flirting.

Collecting herself, she barrels back into the room.

"What the hell are you doing?" She whispers to her reflection, face too flushed for her liking.

A hard knock at the door pulls her from her self chastisement, "You didn't even wait for my rating."

She sighs loudly covering her face in embarrassment at her own action. She doesn't even have alcohol to blame this time.

"I don't care. This was stupid, let's stop."

Of course he ignores her.

"I liked it. But it's too...sexy for convention. You should wear that for someone special. I doubt anyone with a beating heart would be able to resist you."

What the fuck.

This isn't who they are, when did they become comfortable enough for conversations like this? They despised each other, right? Confused and annoyingly flattered, she peels the dress off her body trying her hardest not to think about the fact that only a door separates him and her naked body.

"I would love to see the others. But I have to go, but if you want my opinion. Red is definitely your color."

"What?" She replies, but she can hear the too loud click of the front opening and then closing and just as capriciously as he arrived, he leaves. 

Burying something that feels a lot like disappointment she flops onto her bed, head fuzzy like its been wrapped in cotton.

"What is going on?"

They don't see much of each other the next day and it's unusual given how much they see each other on a regular basis but she refuses to think about it or even consider that he's avoiding her. He's just busy and she doesn't care anyway, they have nothing to do with each other.

The convention is in two days now, she has her overnight bag packed with all her new purchases and the messages have been pouring in their group chat. She's mostly chosen to ignore them but on a whim she decides to check what they're so excited about, only to feel her stomach drop.

Why isn't Hye Jin answering?

Maybe she's busy with her mystery man 😉

Oh! She has to bring him, we need to interrogate him!

Yoon Hye Jin don't pretend you don't see these messages!!

That she had forgotten about.

"Why did you tell them that he's interested in you? Has living here altered your brain, you idiot." She berates herself.

"Who's interested in you? Why are you an idiot?" Mi-seon looks curious from the doorway, without waiting for an invitation she hops onto the bed with two cans of beer. She grabs one, drinking it in a flash.

"Oh it's that kind of night." Mi-seon says excitedly running to grab more beers.

"So let me get this straight, you told them that Chief Hong is interested in you and that he's been chasing you but you're not interested?"

She nods meekly, wishing the floor would swallow her up.

"Why did you lie?"

That's the brunt of the issue, she's a liar. She should have sent her initial message and told them that there was nothing between them but how could she when they were all calling him handsome and acting like she finally did something right? She'd spent that entire dinner feeling like her teenage self on the outside looking in, wanting nothing more than to be someone worthy of being included.

"I know I should have told the truth."

"Yes, you should have told them that you're interested in him too."

Huh.

Time stops as she processes the words that her best friend just uttered. There is static in her head as she tries to make sense of it.

"What are you talking about?"

Mi-seon looks at her unimpressed.

"You can both keep lying to yourself but the rest of us aren't as stupid. You're both interested in each other. It's mutual."

She wants to ardently deny the accusation but the words are caught in her throat and all she can manage are refusing sounds.

"You've been wearing red all week." Mi-seon says accusingly and she jumps up in huff, "So what? I'm allowed to wear colors!"

"You hate wearing red. You said it makes your skin look too pale. You hardly ever wear it. So color me surprised when I learned that red is the favorite color of a certain part timer."

That damn town chat. There has to be a way to get Mi-seon out of it. Maybe it was a mistake letting her live here. She was learning too much.

"Don't even bother to deny it. I won't believe anything you say. But I think you should ask him to go with you, you'll get some time alone to figure this out."

There's nothing to figure out. They are..... acquaintances who can admit that the other is vaguely attractive at times. His face isn't all that bad and she's pretty, so it's natural that there is tension at times, like he said they were still humans.

So she doesn't tell him about her fib, pretending everything is fine until it's the day of the convention and her anxiety has all but smothered her and her hands have a slight tremble in them as she starts to drive.

"It's going to be fine. Everything will be okay." She doesn't believe a word she's saying to herself, her heart is thumping in her heaving chest. She doesn't want to go alone. Convincing Mi-seon to leave was a failed endeavour, her and that police officer becoming inseparable. She knew what that smile meant when her best friend had realized that she would have the house to herself. She could barely get a word in as Mi-seon started frantically shaving her legs then pushed her out of the bathroom to "shave her wild cat".

With a sigh she starts driving, the car too quiet despite what she'd told Du-Sik and the Gongjin grannies. Uncharacteristically she turns on the radio, kpop blaring from the speakers. She recognizes the tune, never before has something as mundane as butter seemed so interesting but the kitchen essential was given new life by the song. She bops her head to the catchy beat, trying to ignore the fact that she's driving to the lion's den.

Some time later, she pulls into the hotel a valet already coming over to get her car. Grabbing her overnight bag, she exits the car handing her keys to the waiting hands of the valet.

Everyone is here and none of them had come alone, she was the only one without a plus one. They haven't noticed her yet so she watches as they all laugh at a joke she can't hear, unnecessarily stroking at their husband's chests as if to show off their exorbitantly priced wedding rings. Everything was always a competition here.

She shouldn't have come. Their was nothing about her life that they would be envious of. She was going to make a fool of herself. Impulsively she starts stepping back but it's too late, Hong In-A spots her and points her out and immediately all eyes are on her, they all start walking over to her and she wants nothing more than to run far, far away. Get on a bus and go to the beach and never see any of them ever again. But she's no longer a child, no longer that scared little girl; worked too hard to shed that skin.

Fortifying herself she puts on a fake smile. Ready for war.

"Hye-Jin ah, there you are. We were beginning to think you wouldn't come. You never responded in the group chat." Ye-Ri states with an attitude, looking around her as if searching for someone and eyes brightening when she sees no one. "Did you come alone?" This makes all of them perk up, looking around like chickens with their heads clucking. She swallows the shame the question elicits, "Who would I be with? I told you in already, it's not like that."

They all look at her with pity, it makes her want to slap them all across the face. Who were they to make her feel like shit, she didn't need anyone that didn't make her pathetic.

Finally one of the husbands cracks the awkward tension by introducing himself, she tries her best to ignore the pervasive way his eyes run down her body. Instinctively she crosses her arms, feeling naked under his stare. Nobody else notices her discomfort and after all the introductions, they all walk away as if she's no longer worth their time.

Lump in her throat she walks into the hotel, determined not to show them that they've gotten under her skin.

There's a scheduled lunch and she tries to find a new table but Sung-Mi waves her over and she doesn't see anyone else she recognizes or wants to sit with.

He hadn't been wrong, she has no friends besides Mi-seon.

"You were looking around, were you looking for someone? Are we not good enough to sit with?" The question is asked with a bite and sneer as if the idea is laughable that she would ever be better than any of them.

She swallows her pride, "No nothing like that. I was merely looking around."

Sung-Mi looks satisfied as if putting her in her place has righted her world.

They begin a conversation that completely excludes her, regaling drama that she knows nothing about and doing nothing to bring her up to date or invite her to join. It's the polar opposite of her experience in the countryside and with shocking clarity she realizes that she wishes she were there, it's only been a few hours but she misses it. Nobody looks down on her there, no usually she's the only doing that she notes with shame.

"I'll find the restroom." She says to no one because none of them are paying her any mind except the husband with the wandering eyes and she would much rather not have that attention.

Thankfully the bathroom is empty and she has to stop herself from splashing water on her face, her make-up was done perfectly it would be a waste to ruin it. Pushing her hair behind her ears she takes a deep breath and then another until her head is clearer, the noise lessening.

"It's only a day and a night. You've suffered far worst."

With that lacking pep talk she exits the bathroom, almost colliding into a wall. Wait, no it's just a person- a chest to be specific. She looks up ready to apologize when a familiar face stops her in her tracks.

"What are you doing here?" She stares flabbergasted at him, more dressed up than she's ever seen him. In a white suit with a white vest, the tee-shirt peeking under the only thing that feels like him to her. And his white sneakers. She can't hide her surprise at his sudden appearance and without thinking she starts to pull him to the side, to avoid being seen but she's not fast enough and soon they are swarmed by her colleagues, before she even has a chance to talk to him.

"Aren't you the man from the picture?" Yoo-Jin asks blushing way too much for a married woman if her husband's cold stare means anything.

"The picture?" Du-sik replies, clearly confused.

"You're the guy that's chasing after her. She told us that you liked her and you were courting her." Sung-Mi answers for her, she wants to vanish. It would be better if she had never existed. Even non-existence would be better than this embarrassing moment. "I got a picture of you two last time, when you followed her."

His eyes ping-pong between the group and her and she realizes this is his chance to ruin her. After everything she's done, all her rude comments and snobby remarks about the town and people he cares for so much, this is his chance for revenge. He can laugh and deny any feelings for her, tell them all that she's a liar and he's never been interested in her, not even once. This is what is going to happen. She prepares herself for the fall out, surely after this she won't be able to show her face in Seoul again.

He starts to laugh and her stomach tightens, her palms are so sweaty.

Here it goes.

"Oh I guess she wanted to keep me a secret."

Wait. What. That doesn't sound like denial.

"We're together now. I finally bulldozed those walls and made her mine. Nice to meet you all I'm Hong Du-sik, Hye-Jin ah's boyfriend."

Her eyes widen as he bows and starts to shake hands with the husbands, the one that stared at her looking disappointed. Their handshake goes on for a second too long, eventually with the latter pulling away with a pained look. She's too confused to consider what that means.

"And you were so cold earlier saying you had no one. Did you want to make a fool of us?"

He answers for her, "It's nothing like that, my honey is still getting used to us. I'm sorry I'm so late I had something to take care of."

Her head is spinning too fast to keep up with everything happening and she's grateful when he excuses them and guides her outside with a large hand on her hip.

Fresh air is much appreciated and she takes in huge heaps of it as soon as they're free.

Then reality crashes down on her.

He knows about her lying.

He had called her bluff.

But he didn't out her.

"Why didn't you tell them the truth?" She finally manages to say, head still reeling.

But instead of answering he's staring at her legs, then slowly his eyes swivel upward cross her thighs curving around her hips, past her breasts (a bit too slow there) before moving to her collar and settling on her face.

"You look great."

She feels the heat rushing to her face. What was he doing to her?

It hadn't been in purpose but she finds herself in red again, an a line dress with criss crossing straps over her shoulder and a middle slit. It was conservative without being too formal or professional. She'd felt comfortable in it but now seeing that look on his face, comfort is the last thing she feels.

He was distracting her and she couldn't afford that with those harpies inside waiting for her downfall. They needed to get back on track.

"What are you doing here?" She tries again, but he responds with his own question, "Why did you tell them that I was chasing you?"

"It was a mistake. They thought we were together and I just....said that for no reason." It's half the truth.

"They don't seem like your friends. You looked like you needed someone on your side, so I just found myself saying we were together for no reason."

She looks at him blankly, heart pounding now. In her moment of weakness instead of kicking her, he'd lended a helping hand. What kind of person did it make her for expecting the former?

"So what now?" She asks still in disbelief that he's here and that he'd told people that there were dating, she would be angry and offended later that they had readily believed it. Perhaps it didn't seem too farfetched now with him looking like that right now.

"Well, don't look but they're watching us through the glass."

This time she finds herself turning to look and he's the one that has to stop her, he does so by suddenly grabbing her hand and tugging her into his body. She squeaks at the collision. Leaning down so his lips are level with her ear, he speaks, "We can give them a show. I'm happy to be your pretend boyfriend."

Why?

She yearns to ask him why he's willing to go this far for her? Why was he even here when she had never told him where the convention was taking place? But his words were hot on her ear and she's tired of being their source of entertainment so she nods looking up at him, "Just this once. I'm going to lean on you. Let me borrow your eraser and copy your homework."

He stares before a blinding smile graces his handsome face.

"Let's go then." His hand is heavy on her waist as he walks back towards the hotel, taking his role very seriously it seems.

He fits in perfectly. Able to talk about a plethora of topics to anyone he's introduced to and even she's impressed by him. Be it travel, philosophy or poetry he seems well versed in everything things that even she is ignorant to and it makes her regret the way she looked down on him before, he was anything but a country bumpkin.

She leaves him to his conversation to get a drink, a whiskey on the rocks. Needing something hard tonight.

Not that. Down brain.

"Yoon Hye Jin? I would recognize that face anywhere."

Twisting to face the voice, she sees a familiar face- old classmate. Rung Do-Bae, they weren't anything more than classmates despite his many, many attempts.

His eyes sweep over her hungrily. She swallows her drink, painting on a shallow smile.

"Sunbae, how nice to see you here."

Invading her space he grabs her hand, "There is no need for such formalities. You can just call me by my name, Hye Jin ah."

As if she ever would.

Gently she tries to extract her hand but he won't let go and she doesn't want to make a scene.

Suddenly she's warmed by a body pressing into her, she knows who it is without even looking, her body relaxes immediately.

"Sorry I got lost in conversation honey. Who might this be? Another friend of yours?" He thrusts his right hand out and Do-Bae has no choice but to release her hand to return his handshake. Scarily enough she's starting to become used to his nickname, barely reacting to him using it again.

"Yes, this is my sunbae from school. Sunbae this is Hong Du Sik my....."

She knows that this is all an act, they were doing this to help her but she can't bring her tongue to form around the word, boyfriend.

"Her boyfriend." He finishes for her, pulling her tighter to his body.

But Do-Bae looks suspicious now.

"Boyfriend? I thought you were still single. You never changed your status on SNS. I've checked."

"Why are you so curious about that?" Du-sik challenges in return, doing a great job of sounding like a jealous boyfriend. She's almost even convinced.

"Hye Jin ah and I have always had a very special relationship. Beyond that of a hoobae and sunbae. Isn't that right?" He directs the last bit to her and she feels Du-sik stiffen next to her, seemingly believing these lies. So she clears that up.

"I have no idea what you're referring to honestly. We have never had anything that would constitute as a "special" relationship. I would appreciate if you didn't spread such lies, especially to my boyfriend. Enjoy the rest of your night."

She tugs Du-sik away, not waiting for a reply from the other man. The conversation was over anyway.

When they get far enough he speaks, "You have a lot of admirers."

She raises an eyebrow at the non-sequitur.

"Are you surprised?"

He brushes a hand across her cheek, making her freeze.

"No. It makes sense."

She blinks slowly before laughing, it sounds fake even to her ears.

"You should have been an actor. Your acting skills are incredible." He doesn't laugh, doesn't move before they're pulled into another conversation and she tries not to think about how tightly his body is pressed against her own.

"How is he in bed? He hasn't left you alone all day, I bet it's passionate." As soon as lunch had ended they had invited her to a spa, she'd considered saying no but she knew they would talk about her even if she wasn't there so it was best to at least know what they were saying.

Du-sik looked sad to see her go, but she told herself that she wasn't good at reading his faces. They hardly knew each other.

"I can't remember the last time I had a passionate night of sex. Kids and a full time job, leave no time for that. I'm pretty sure he's cheating on me and I'm too tired to even care." Sung-Mi confesses and she's shocked when the others nod in agreement instead of threatening to castrate him, as she'd done when Mi-seon told her about her ex boyfriend cheating.

"I have no complaints. He's... attentive. He's always touching me and pushing his way into my space. He's gentle but passionate, and I like...that he's so much bigger than me." She knows she should stop, this is definitely taking the lies too far. But that night bleeds into her thoughts, making everything she's saying feel true. He'd been so gentle with her, those huge hands cupping her face. She wondered how they would feel on other parts of her body.

"Damn. Look at you getting horny just from remembering. I'm so jealous."

Jealous. There were envious of her, it was all she'd been hoping for but the happiness she expected to erupt never comes. Instead she feels cheap, like she'd used Du-sik for her own benefit. She had tainted that night. This wasn't what she wanted.

As the day had gone on she found herself looking at him too much, he'd come all the way just for her and regardless of her brain trying to minimize that, it was huge. He hated snobby people like them who based a person's worth in their monetary success and yet he put on a smile and chatted with everyone, letting them mock his way of life and call people like him useless dreamers. All while she did nothing to defend him and drank wine, happy that they were being accepted.

He was the perfect gentleman all day and he was getting nothing in return for this. It was all just to help her.

Would a friend truly go this far to help? Was she being naive or was it like Mi-seon said, was she lying to herself?

"I'm such an idiot."

Without another word, she flees the sauna rushing to the locker room and changing back into her clothes. Nobody follows her because they aren't her friends. Why had she wasted so much time trying to impress these people who aren't even truly happy in their own lives?

The drive back is long, and she doesn't know what she's going to say but she knows that she's tired of being scared.

Leaving the key in the car she rushes past the valet, into the hotel elevator pressing their floor and waiting impatiently.

It takes three tries to get into their hotel room but once the door opens, he's right there. Sitting in the seat by the window reading a book.

"You're back early. I thought you would be gone until three?" He looks up, dog earring his book and giving her his full attention. Her heart skips a beat.

"Why did you agree to do this for me? Why go through all this trouble for me?"

It's the same question he's been asking himself since he first met her. Why was he was interested in her and why did he keep wanting to save her?

It was the desire that led to him being here.

He had accidentally overhead Mi-seon talking to Eun Chol about being worried about her, the convention was overnight and everyone would be bringing someone and she'd be all alone. The thought of her alone and isolated, made him race to her without a plan. Only stopping at a store to buy his outfit so he would fit in with her crowd, he'd spent more in that shop then he usually did in a week. But it was worth it for her.

It was a miracle that she hadn't questioned his presence more, he knew it was shameless and deceiving but none of this felt like pretending to him. His jealousy had been real, he'd had to strangle the urge to kick the pervert husband with the wandering eyes and then the insistent sunbae who wouldn't take a hint. She was a vision in the red dress and it wasn't a surprise that men found her enchanting, he just didn't like them looking at her. But she wasn't his, never would be because he couldn't confess.

They weren't right for each other.

"Do you like me?"

That question again. Last time he had laughed it off, called it absurd. But it wasn't. Not liking her would have been absurd.

"I don't know why you're asking me that."

"Because I'm tired of us lying to ourselves. Don't laugh and don't you dare say it's absurd again."

He can't respond, he's stuck on the word "us". It wasn't just him, they were an us?

Hearing that gives him courage he had long thought had been most forever.

"I wasn't pretending today. Nothing was fake to me, I meant it all." It's terrifying, unchartered land for them and he waits to see which one of them will chicken out first. It's sure to happen.

"I'm going to kiss you." She says instead of running like he expected and secretly wished for.

And then she's crossing the room and leaning down to grab his face, she watches him giving him a chance to pull away but he does the opposite, this time he meeting her half way. As soon as their lips meet the kiss is already too much, she's sliding into his lap and he wraps his arms around her tugging her closer until their chests are squished together.

He hasn't kissed anyone like this in a long time.

Hasn't been this close to losing control in a longer time.

"You're dangerous." He whispers into her mouth and she giggles at the statement, wiggling in his arms and rolling into him forcing a punched out groan from his lips.

Carefully he lifts her shirt watching her face closely for any signs that she wants to stop but finding nothing but her palpable lust.

Her skin is unbelievably smooth and soft and he can't stop himself from stroking her, rubbing at her back his hands resting right above her butt.

"How long have you felt this way?" She asks softly seductively nipping at his neck and running a hand over his shirt to caress his stomach, he physically aches for her.

"I wanted you the moment I saw you. But I didn't feel this until you convinced grandma to get her implants. That was when it became more for me."

She looks surprised and he is too, that they're speaking so candidly about feelings they've always denied.

"What about you?"

She stops licking at his neck to look him in the eyes. He's nervous to hear her reply.

"I.... don't know."

He tries to hide his disappointment. Maybe she was starting to retreat back into her shell. Maybe he shouldn't have been so honest.

He's about to untangle them when she continues, "It wasn't at first sight but one day I found myself looking for you. Seeing you become the best part of my day, I started to count on you to be there for me. To expect it. Just like this, I've been scared to lean on anyone until I met you."

Now that's a confession.

Impulsively he stands with her still on his lap, forcing her to to latch onto him so she doesn't tumble to the floor. Not that this would ever happen because he would never let her fall.

"I could have fell!" She cries, clinging to his shoulders and wrapping her legs around his waist. Her half naked bra clad body so close to him is causing another biological crisis in his pants.

Walking to the large bed in the middle of the room he falls backwards, enjoying the view of her on top of him a little too much.

It's all probably too soon and they should probably slow down, but his body is strumming and he wants nothing more than to break her apart.

"I'm all sweaty. I should take a shower."

Instantly an image of her wet and naked under the downpour of a shower flashes in his mind and he has to twist away from her.

"Pervert." She accuses but he can hear how satisfied she is with his reaction. Damn tease.

"Do you want to join me?" She teases some more, having fun now that she knows her power over him.

He looks at her helplessly.

"Are you having fun? Remember what I told you before? I'm still a guy. You're sitting here in your bra taunting me, do you think I'm that much of a good guy? Do you think I don't want to throw you down, rip your clothes off and eat you alive? I'm so hard right now just seeing you naked would be enough to push me over the edge. So don't make propositions you can't follow through on."

She looks dizzy from his words, eyes hooded and glossy. He watches her gulp and then stagger off to the bathroom, without a word to him. It's probably for the best, everything is too charged right now.

A shower for her and many glasses of water for him later, she's back and it's almost time for dinner.

"I think they said dinner starts at 6. Should we head down?"

She glances at him, while opening her bag and pulling out skin creams and some fuzzy socks.

"Would you be opposed to ordering room service and staying here?"

It's the best offer he's heard all day, only second to her asking if he wanted to join her in the shower.

"What about your colleagues?" He asks to make certain that she's really okay with this.

"What about them?" She replies with a shrug and he grins picking up the room service menu.

They order too much food and not enough alcohol but neither of them want to forget this night. She tells him stories about her time in dental school and he's happy to get to know her better, chuckling at the funny stories and commiserating at the sad ones.

Before he knows it night has fallen.

And he realizes that they'll be sharing a bed. Unless she wants him to sleep on the couch.

She's wearing a big shirt and loose shorts and he still can't believe he gets to see her like this.

"Are you coming to bed?" She's already getting under the sheet and that answers his question, this is really happening. He starts to follow her lead, getting under the sheets but keeping a respectable distance between them.

"I'm cold." She announces suddenly and he starts to look for a thermostat in the room or an extra blanket, before realizing that she's looking at him over her shoulder, he stares back confused before she lifts an eyebrow and oh, he gets it. Carefully moving closer he feels her warmth surround him as they meet, forth to back.

"Took you long enough." She grumbles, pulling his arm over here body and settling back into him moving until she's comfortable.

She's so close and warm and her smell is all around him and he feels his restraint dissolving and when she presses back into him, her hip rubbing against his crotch he bites down on his bottom lip.

It's too much for him to resist and without warning or preamble, he's turning her to face him and swallowing her moan of surprise eagerly. He grabs her head firmly holding her in place and slips his tongue into her open mouth, her unique taste exploding on his taste buds. He's hungry for more. So he starts to tug down her shorts, heart beat thundering in his groin. She kicks the shorts away, and he groans at the sight of her panties she was trying to kill him, he was certain.

"You're the devil." He chokes out staring at red lace, he'll never be able to see the color again without getting a raging hard on.

"You haven't seen anything yet. Honey." The word drips from her tongue just like the real thing.

Forgetting all reason and logics he lunges at her, devouring her mouth and sticking his hand in her panties. She's so warm and fuck, wet drenching his fingers.

Simultaneously he thrusts his tongue into her mouth and his fingers in her wet folds, groaning as she melts like butter under his touch. There's no resistance, as he plunges two fingers inside her experimentally before picking up his place when she clutches onto him and grinds back on his fingers, begging the whole time.

"More, more, please!"

As if he could ever deny her anything, with one hand he grabs her ass and the other he thrusts into her opening over and over until her voice gets breathy and she starts to stutter, squirming wildly in his arms and he knows exactly what's coming: the beautiful end. So without warning he pulls back the sheet and slithers down her body, throwing her legs around his head and pushing his tongue in to the brim, hungrily drinking at her until she shakes and combusts in his arms. Sweet on his tongue, he swallows it all greedily.

He strokes her as she recovers from her high, climbing back up her body. So much for taking things slow, but he can't even think about regretting it when he sees the blissed out look on her face. He wants to imprint it in his mind. Nobody else will ever get to see this face but him.

"It's your turn." She says sounding loopy like she's drunk and he laughs as she reaches for the tent in his pants but misses his bulge and instead falls into him.

"You're tired. Go to sleep. That was enough for me, seeing you like that fulfilled every fantasy I've had. "

He truly means it. He's a giver. And it's not like he can't tug one out later in the bathroom with her face and moans playing on repeat in his brain.

She starts to argue, but her phone vibrating on the nightstand distracts her. Reaching over she picks it up before chuckling and flopping back into the bed.

"What?" He asks curious, jealous of whoever is making her smile like that.

Ignorant to his inner thoughts, she thrusts her phone into his face. The room is so dark it takes a moment for his eyes to adjust to the bright lighting of the phone, but once he can see he reads the message on her phone and starts to laugh too.

"Dusik is missing! Nobody has seen him all day!! We started a search party."

[pascalpanic]

Spitfire (Javier Peña x f!Reader)

Summary: You’re working on a case file in your apartment with Javier. It’s late. He tells you that you need to relax, and you say no, but then he offers to help you calm down. Warnings: 18+, smut, and it’s graphic smut. cursing too. Javier Peña comes with his own warning. brief mentions of alcohol/alcoholism and of period-typical misogyny. oral sex (f and m receiving), p in v sex. WC: 4.4k A/N: Lol my longest one yet and it’s smut. Well, I’ve been being hounded to post my first smut fic, and who better than with the devil himself, Javi? I saw this masterlist of smut prompts (written by @prolixitae) and had a friend choose two for me, so this one is going to include those, including “you’re being so good for me, I knew you could take it all” and “answer the phone, I dare you.” Welp, here we go!

Rarely did women catch his eye the way you did. He’d admire their asses in their skirts, their breasts and the way they’d cause their buttons to tug at the matching hole on their blouses. Javier was discreet about it, but it was always what he noticed first. With you, it was surprising, and it almost made him give a chuckle when he’d think about it. You were wonderfully built, of course, and he definitely came to adore that, but he always rested his eyes on your face. You had the most wonderful eyes he’d ever seen, he thought, not just from the stunning color but from the way they held every ounce of your personality in them. They always betrayed just what you were feeling: your rage at him, which was often, or your adoration of a child or a dog on the street, your intensity as you scanned the paper on the desk in front of you.

Not only did your eyes astound Javier, but your lips captivated him. You frequently wore different shades of lipstick, and every one looked more delectable than the last to him, who wanted nothing more than to kiss you so hard it came off all over his face, or to have smears of it left on his chest or his hips. They looked incredibly soft, gentle yet strong, and the words that flew out of them, often without a thought, made his own tug up in the corner of his face and expose that dimple. He’d even seen you without makeup a few times, after a particularly long stakeout or a hard night of partying. He found them just as beautiful when they were their natural color, just as attractive and luscious.

The rest of your face made him smile just to think about; it was the very essence of you, of course it brought a grin to his normally stoic face. Your eyebrows and cheekbones perfectly framed those beautiful eyes, your nose quirked adorably when you were either full of rage or joy. Your cheeks moved with your lips or nose, and he wanted to kiss every little line or fold on that beautiful skin of yours, loving the way the tone looked against the equally stunning clothes you wore.

Over time, his appreciation of the rest of your body grew too. The pencil skirts you wore complimented your stunning ass, and the clacking of the heels you paired them with made him weak at the knees when he knew the noise was you walking his way. On stakeouts, in civilian clothes, even the comfortable things you wore were stunning. The curve of your chest beneath a t-shirt, the way your jeans were ripped and exposing the skin of your legs beneath them. The littlest things about you were beautiful to him, but God if they weren’t becoming a distraction.

It’s 01:00, as Javier likes to call it, as the two of you face each other with a look of frustration on each face. You sit in your apartment, the one just above his, him on your couch and you on the floor. “Fuck,” you practically shout and toss the papers down onto the coffee table between you. “How can there be this little evidence of a man who’s fucking everywhere? He runs the entire fucking country like a puppet on a string, and we can’t find a shred of evidence that’s enough to get a goddamn warrant.” Your rage was apparent on your face, causing you to clench your fist around your empty can of soda until it’s a ball of crumpled aluminum. You look up at Javi, practically steaming out of your ears. “How the hell do you do this job?” You ask, breathing heavy from your momentary rage.

I stare at your tits until I’m feeling something else, Peña thinks to himself. He knows he can’t say that, so he takes a second and just sighs, shaking his head. “I leave it at the office,” he chides, leaning forward and tossing a folder onto the table. You had been working on this case alone all night, scanning through paperwork. Hearing you pace around your apartment that sat directly above his, an equally awake Javier had come up to your apartment and knocked, offering his assistance. He and his partner Steve, who lived next door to you with his wife Connie, had been working on another aspect of the Escobar case. You and yours, Rick Harrigan, had been focused on getting something to use as a warrant to invade his home. Unfortunately, your partner was an incompetent alcoholic who was about as much use to you as Escobar himself.

“Easy for you to say,” you shake your head. “I personally call it giving a shit, Javi,” you say sharply. “When you’re not as respected as a man in this field, you have to work twice as hard. And when your partner is too drunk to show up and not get himself killed, twice as hard as that.” You angrily staple two papers together, using the hit to the appliance as a release of your rage.

“Woah there, bonita,” Javier says as he watches, earning an angry glare from you that eases when his eyes meet yours. You sigh and lean back against the wall, running a hand over your hair, loosening from the ponytail it’s tied in. “You need to relax somehow. It’s one in the morning now, did you notice that?” he asks teasingly, chuckling as your eyes fly open. “Guess you didn’t. Get some sleep,” he tells you and crosses his legs, leaning back on the couch.

You sigh again and untie your ponytail, shaking out your hair. “I’m sorry, Javi. I should. I probably woke you too, with my pacing, and I’ll be lucky if I didn’t wake Steve and Connie too.” You groan and look up at him, finding his eyes trained on you. “What?” you ask curiously.

Javier had been staring at how beautifully messy you looked, how your hair was a mess and your makeup was smudged, barely clinging to your face. You looked absolutely wrecked, and it was far more attractive to him than it should’ve been. It almost looked like you had just rolled out of bed with someone, and the look moved his blood somewhere in his body lower than it needed to be. “Nothing,” he says with a gulp and you quirk an eyebrow.

You’d clearly be lying if you didn’t find yourself attracted to the man in front of you. He was an equal to you in the office, but he liked to act like your superior. Naturally, with your temper, you refused to let that happen, leading to some tension between the two of you. The tension, however, wasn’t necessarily the bad kind. If you had less cowardice, you’d ask him out. You know he’d say yes. Javier has a reputation for never turning down a date with a willing woman.

That’s the thing though. It would be labeled a date at first, but it wouldn’t remain that way for long. You could, and admittedly did, picture what would happen: you’d show up in some sexy little dress, Javier wearing a tight shirt, one open button short of professional, and equally tight jeans that highlight his ass. You’d each get in a drink and a half and the next morning you’d wake in your own bed, a delicious ache between your legs and no Javier to be seen.

Clearing that thought from your head, you tie your hair into a ponytail once more and pick up another paper from the desk. “I’m… we’re gonna get murdered if I don’t get this done by Friday morning. God knows Rick won’t be working on it,” you sigh and shake your head, scanning the paper.

“Your head is going to pop if you keep shoving shit in there,” he teases you, nudging you with his leg under the coffee table. “Get some rest.”

You gulp, biting down on your lip. He’s going to keep telling you that, but you can’t do it. It’s too much work, and your fear of failure is greater than your need for sleep. The emotions build inside, mostly frustration: at Javi telling you to rest, at your incompetent partner, at yourself. “I’ve told you this, Javi, I have to keep working. I can sleep later.”

“Do you want me to go beat the shit out of Harrigan for you? I’m not above that,” he offers, his tone clearly teasing.

You chuckle a little and look at him, tears welling in your eyes. “You’re too kind,” you say, voice thick with emotion before you turn back to the paper, “but that wouldn’t change anything except make your life harder and him drink more to cope with the injury.” As you finish talking, your words rise in pitch until the tears fall from your face.

“Hey, hey,” Javier says quickly, getting on his knees on the other side of the coffee table, one hand reaching out to the side of your face. “Don’t cry, cariña,” he says softly, wiping the tears from one eye with his thumb. “It’s gonna be okay. You’re a much better agent than you’re giving yourself credit for, and getting Escobar is like catching a greased pig,” his native Texan adages coming out. You giggle a little at that and he smiles softly. “Let me help you. We’ll go talk to the ambassador about Harrigan together, and I’ll help you search all of this.”

“Javi, you have all of your assigned work, and like you said, it’s one in the morning, you need to sleep-”

“No, you need sleep. I run on cigarettes and rage alone,” he says, earning another soft chuckle from you. “We’ll search this for another hour, see if there’s anything we can use, and if it doesn’t pan out we’ll both go to bed and start this again in the morning.”

You nod softly, leaning into his hand. “You’re much nicer late at night, Peña,” you tease him, causing him to drop the smile, the stoic look returning to his face only accentuated by the growing shadow of stubble on his skin.

Javi chuckles a little. “You’re the only one who’s ever been brave enough to tease me,” he admits, a thick eyebrow slightly raising as he grabs another file from the table and opens it, starting to comb through it. “You’re una volcán,” he chuckles and takes a sip of the glass of whiskey sitting on the table. You look at him questioningly. “A spitfire.”

You roll your eyes. “It’s called being a woman and having had enough,” you tease back at him drily. “Though I suppose I do have plenty of balls to go around. More than any of the men in our department.”

Shaking his head, Javi leaves it there, though he desperately wants to flirt back. You want to leave it there too, but you can’t. Something in you has to get the last word with him, has to get him fired up enough to retort, maybe to do something he shouldn’t to you. “Sometimes I think I’m the only one around here who can’t just go get fucked and forget about the job.”

“Who says I get fucked?” He asks flirtatiously as he takes another sip from his whiskey, and a small smirk falls across your face.

“If it’s about forgetting about something, you need to be the one receiving,” you flirt, daring to get on your knees and lean across the table, trying to get as close to his face as you can to say the words.

Javier reciprocates the movement, taking this as a challenge. “Is that an offer or a request?” He teases back, leaning forward until you can feel his hot breath on your face.

“I’ll let you decide that,” you chuckle quietly and close the distance between the two of you, your lips crashing together. It’s hot and desperate and needy for a moment, nearly moaning into the kiss but stopping yourself. It continues, sloppy and heated and needy. “You’re the one who was in tears earlier,” Javi murmurs between kisses. “I think that means that you’re the one in need of some forgetting.”

“I think that sounds wonderful,” you sigh as his lips move to your jaw. Javi breaks away from you, standing for a moment before situating himself on the couch. He lies back, head on a pillow, unbuttoning his shirt a little. He smirks as he watches you noticing. “Well? You gonna come sit on my face or what?” He asks with a similar smirk, unbuttoning his shirt the rest of the way and letting his shirt fall open but rest on his shoulders.

Your mouth nearly drops open. Nothing in you ever questioned that Javier would be an extremely generous lover; even rumors around the office indicated that. No, you just didn’t expect him to be so blunt about it. It makes your blood run cold for a moment. You nod and stand, shimmying the leggings down your legs and kicking them aside. So caught up in your lust, you try to walk forward but your shin finds the coffee table. “Fuck,” you yelp, now kicking the coffee table to shove it out of your path to the man looking at you like he’s starving and there’s a four-course meal between your legs. It drags and screeches across the floor, making a loud noise and you wince. It wobbles and thunks, making more noise than anything should be at what’s now approximately 1:40 A.M..

“Hey, take your anger out here instead,” Javi flirts, scooting further from the back of the couch so you can get properly on him. Once you finally reach his side, he pulls your shirt up frantically as high as he can before you have to do the rest. You pull it off to reveal a generic black bra, but it makes the rising tent in Javier’s jeans grow. “Oh fuck, look at you cariño,” he murmurs, hands gliding up your sides. You pull off your panties and finally straddle him, grinding your hips into his and earning an absolutely sinful groan from him. “No, not now. Get up here,” he murmurs, grabbing your hips and scooting you up his body until you’re seated on his face.

You lean forward, a hand on the arm of the couch for balance, and Javier nearly dies from the sight above him. He licks a tentative stripe up your folds and you moan helplessly, your head falling back. “Javi,” you whisper, and then again when he brings up his fingers to toy at your entrance. “Jesus Christ,” you shudder as his mouth finds your clit, swishing it with his tongue and lapping at it.

A hand finds his hair and you curl your fingers in it tight as he slips his fingers into you. Two digits immediately begin exploring inside of you and you whimper before you can stop yourself. His lips circle your clit as his tongue plays with it, desperately eating you out. It feels amazing, and his name escapes your lips again and again. You cry out his name softly, already sweating and flushed from the pleasure, before you notice it:

Brrrrrring. Brrrrrring.

It’s the phone. “Who the fuck is calling now?” you whine, annoyed at the fact that it’s while Javier’s face is buried in your pussy more so than the fact that it’s in the dead of the night. You ignore it for a few moments more, whimpering at the way Javier’s tongue works against you. He stops and moves you slightly.

“Answer the phone, I dare you,” he murmurs, a fire in his eyes before that smart mouth returns to his task at hand.

“Fuck, I can’t, I’m gonna sound terrible,” you manage out through moans and soft whimpers. Javier makes a noise into you, indicating that you’d better. “Fucker. Be nice to me,” you whisper to him before you answer. “Hello?”

“Sweetie, is everything okay?” you hear Connie’s voice, whispering yet frantic, on the other end.

“Yeah, just fine,” you say, panting from the feeling of Javi beneath you.

“Are you sure? What the hell happened? Steve was going to go check on you but I made sure he didn’t, he wants to make sure you’re okay too,” she starts rambling, clearly cupping her hand over the microphone so the whisper can’t escape it.

What a sight that would be: Steve opening the door to find his partner eating out their coworker. You almost moan at that but hold back, biting on your lip as she speaks and trying to compose yourself for your turn. “Ye-ah,” you say, a moan slipping out as Javi’s teeth brush your clit. “I stubbed my toe and kicked the coffee table,” you admit, and it’s truthful. That earns Javi a little extra tug on the hair, and he seems to take that as motivation to be even worse.

“You’re sure everything is fine over there?” She asks.

“Great, yeah. Go back to bed, Connie,” you say, still panting helplessly.

“If you’re dead in the morning, you can’t blame me,” she teases and hangs up.

“Fuck you, Javi,” you laugh breathlessly when the line clicks dead. “What the fuck?”

“Hopefully you will,” he murmurs into you, and your anger is immediately resolved as the motion of his fingers and tongue matches perfectly.

You cry out at the mixture before you can stop yourself. “Oh fuck, Javi, I’m really close,” you mutter, your hips canting back against the rhythm he sets. He gives a little noise, and you assume that’s him giving it the okay. He keeps going and going in just the right way until it’s too much and not enough at the same time and- “Javier,” you wail helplessly, your orgasm rushing over you.

He works you through it, moaning into you as you shudder and whine atop of him. He pushes you down to straddle his torso when you’re done. He smirks up at you, perfectly content with himself. “Bastard,” you murmur and shake your head before kissing him again, moaning as you can taste yourself on his tongue. It continues like that for a moment before you pull away, the noise from the wetness of the kiss absolutely obscene. “Here’s the plan. We’re gonna go to my bedroom and I’m gonna blow you, then you’re gonna fuck me so hard I can’t remember what the name Escobar means.”

The lust in his eyes is practically turning his irises black. “Yes ma’am,” he smirks and kisses you again, sitting up to do so and resting his hands on the sides of your face. You stand and beckon him, turning and walking towards your bedroom, wearing nothing but the black bra you’d neglected to take off earlier.

As he enters, he undoes his belt, tossing it aside, smirking at the image of you sitting on the edge of your bed. “Take off the bra,” he orders and you get ready to do so, giving him a little show before moving your hands to the clasp. “On one condition.”

“You fucking name it and I’ll do it, cariño.”

“When I wake up in the morning, you’ll be next to me.” He pauses for a moment, halfway through unzipping his pants. He looks up at you, eyes unreadable. “You don’t have to be sweet to me, hell, you can destroy me, but you’re staying the night.”

Javi pauses for a second more before the smirk grows. “Deal.” He stands in front of you and shucks his jeans, leaving him in just his boxers, which you quickly pull down. Your eyes bulge as you finally get the chance to see him; he’s massive. This is going to be… interesting, to say the least. A smirk finds your face and you take him in your hand, stroking him softly. “Where do you want me, bonita?” He asks breathily, his head falling back. You stand and push him to sit on the edge of the bed, where you just were, before falling to your knees and spreading his legs.

As you take him in your hand to slowly stroke him, Javier chuckles softly. “You can’t do this for long. I already feel like I’m gonna cum,” he murmurs, his fingertips tracing the side of your face until they reach your chin. You take him in your mouth, just the tip, and already feel overwhelmed. He’s massive, even just the tip is, filling your mouth. You swirl your tongue before pulling off, pressing kisses to the side of his shaft. He watches in awe, panting and sweating, before a moan falls from his lips. “Oh, fuck,” he mumbles, hand resting on your chin.

You take him in your mouth and start bobbing on him, never quite reaching the base but desperate to do so. He shudders. “Think you can take all of me, baby, huh?” he asks, earning a little whimper from you. “You can do it, I think. That big mouth, always sassing me, now you’re using it for this.”

On the next bob, you take all of him, his tip hitting the back of your throat. It makes you gag slightly, but it’s still deeply erotic, making the feeling in your body warm you up even more. “Fuck, my little spitfire, you’re being so good for me. I knew you could take it all.” You whimper around him and come back up, and he pulls you off of him. “No more or I’ll cum down your throat,” he chuckles. “Where are the condoms?”

You stand hurriedly and head to the nightstand, grabbing a condom from the drawer. “I want you however you’ll take me,” you tell him as you unwrap the condom, getting on your knees again to roll it down over him, tossing the wrapper carelessly to the side.

“Just missionary for now. For our first time,” he smirks, tipping your chin up so he can kiss you. You taste so perfect, he thinks, he could probably shoot his load just from kissing you. But not now, not when he has a plan.

You smirk a little at that. First time. Insinuating there will be more to come. You get up from your knees and climb onto the bed, lying down with your head in the pillows. Javier climbs over you, leaning down and kissing you softly. “How hard do you want me?” he asks.

“You decide. You’re the one who’s in charge, remember?” You ask flirtatiously, reaching down to stroke him slowly as you spread your legs wider.

He chuckles darkly and kisses you again, lining himself up with you. His eyes open quickly and he brings his face back, nonverbally asking. You give him a little smirk, nodding softly, and he kisses you again as he pushes into you. You cry out into his lips. He’s so big, you knew that from going down on him, but it’s a delicious stretch. He waits only a moment before pulling out and thrusting back in again, making you whimper his name.

“Javi,” you whine again and again, wrapping your leg around his waist. From the first thrust, he presses against that perfect little spot inside you, making you wetter and wetter with every thrust. “Oh god, harder, harder, just fucking wreck me,” you whine, spreading your free leg as wide as you can.

He brings one hand down to circle your clit, and it makes you squeal helplessly, the way he rubs it just in time with the harsh thrusts inside of you. It all feels so good, all of it, his lips working his way across your neck and working a mark behind your ear.

His thrusts are hard, both for you and for him, and he starts murmuring dirty little words into your ear, biting down on his lip as he thrusts. “So good for me, cariño,” he murmurs before sucking on your earlobe, quickening his tempo. “So tight around me. Never felt anything like you.”

Unable to formulate any words other than his name, you cry it out again. “Fuck, fuck Javi,” you groan, your hands dragging down his back, leaving marks with your nails.

“Such a dirty mouth,” he smirks for a moment before crying out at the feeling of your nails. “Oh, fuck, honey. You gonna cum for me?” he asks, earning a frantic nod for you. “You wanna hold back? We can cum together,” he murmurs, and that receives another nod. “Oh, good girl,” he murmurs, the noises you make going straight to his dick.

Biting down on your lip, you sigh. “I’m holding back, so you better be damn close,” you moan into his ear, working back against him.

He nods. “Okay, okay, come on baby. Come with me, 3, 2, 1….” he counts down and you clench tight around him as your second orgasm rips through your body, making you pulse and flutter around him. The feeling is so perfect, so intense that Javier can’t wait any longer and finally cums into the condom, thrusting harder and harder into you. “Feels so good when you cum,” he whispers to you, voice ragged and breath hot on your skin.

Javier keeps thrusting until the both of you are done, and he finally pulls out and flops down next to you on your mattress. He sits up, removing the condom and putting it in the trashcan by your bed before lying down again and pulling you to him. You rest your head on his sweaty chest and he wraps an arm around you, kissing your head. “Goddamn, honey,” he chuckles, using all of the air in his lungs to make the sound of content. You laugh too, snuggling in closer. “You’re gonna have to let me cum down that pretty little throat sometime soon,” he teases. “Because that’s all I’m gonna be thinking about until it happens.”

You chuckle at that, shaking your head. Suddenly, you freeze as your conscience comes back to you. “Fuck, those files,” you say, a hint of panic in your voice, trying to bolt upright.

Javi hushes you, pulling you back to his chest. “Forget about those files. You need sleep. You’re gonna sleep right here, and we’ll deal with it in the morning. I’ll make an appointment with the ambassador and he’ll send Harrigan’s ass back on the next flight to D.C.”

His words soothe you easily, but you’re still on edge. “No, Javi, I gotta-”

“Didn’t you make me promise I’d be here in the morning? That won’t happen if you don’t fall asleep,” he teases you and cuddles you into his chest. “Forget it, spitfire,” he tells you, and this time, you listen, letting your eyes fall shut as you listen to Javier’s slowing heartbeat, your ear pressed to his chest.

[infinitegalahad]

GENERATION KILL: COMFORTING THERE PARTNER

"This is just me formally submitting a request for that gk boys offering their own forms of comfort fic/ headcanon/ thoughts wtevr. Lol just as a reminder. 😀"@theboardwalkbody

Gif Credit: @ymagor

A/N: You're wish is my command, homes❣️ Here's a little change of pace! @theboardwalkbody inspired this post (and asked it!), so thanks for the Inspo friend! 🤩 I'm doing this for BoB and TP because I'm going through a slight writer's block and instead of thinking about long descriptions, I just wanna so head canons that get a little out of hand. I hope this isn't too ooc😔 Reader has *inserted mental illness* btw, it's up for interpretation! ALSO GN! READER! Enjoy!

Taglist: @theboardwalkbody @contrabandhothead

Masterlist

NATE FICK-

Nate's a calculated person. He can see the patterns in people, things, etc. Like how his father's eyebrows wrinkle when he's excited, or when his mother likes to prep a meal from vegetables to the main course. So when you're happy, sad, whatever-he knows it, and you don't even have to tell him.

He'll come home and see you. He knows that you've heard him calling you're name, but you don't move. He looks all over the house and finds you inside of your tub, just sitting there with no response. The water is running, and your clothes and hair are soaked.

So in an attempt to not disrupt your peace, Nate climbs in and sits next to you. You look over and he's stares at you. Just as your about to speak, he beats you to it.

"I'll get you a towel and some clothes."

And then, he just leaves. You hear the door quietly shut, and you blink for a few seconds. What the hell just happened? It snapped you out of your depressive trance. Now instead of feeling sad-you just were confused.

So you hear the door lightly open again and then close. After a few more minutes of soaking, you get out and see a towel and a set of clothes that are most certainly not yours. It's Nate's Dartmouth Lacrosse sweater and a pair of underwear-he knows you too well.

So you exit the bathroom and you see Nate, putting two cups down of you're favorite tea

And he's got that face. You know the face were he's like ☹️

"Hey, c'mere."

The two of you climb into bed with eachtoher. He throws one of those ugg blankets over you. You rest his head in his chest and he pats your head. There's a silence, until Nate says, "Do you wanna walk about it."

Normally, you'd say no and he'd read you a book you're reading or hold you as you cry, but this time, it's different.

"Yeah, I do. You won't judge, right?"

Nate tilts you chin up, and he's got a tired smile on his face.

"Why would I?"

BRAD COLBERT-

Brad may appear horrible with emotions and reading the room...in which he isn’t

Okay, scratch that. He tries to understand them, it’s just hard for him to give advice and use words to comfort you. He feels like he’s walking on glass, But sometimes, you just need him psychically more then anything.

When you storm out of a room when Chaffin makes a comment on your weight, Brad takes a few minutes to think what he should do.

Normally, he’d just leave you be, but he’s gotta do something. Getting up, he follows you down the hallway. You’re not far, and he’s calling you’re name.

You stop in the hallway, wiping the tears coming down toye face. Brad turns you around with his hands on your shoulder. He’s got a blank face on as he looks at you, seeing your red face and the tears.

While you sob and stutter, he fixes the collar of your shirt, tucks your hair behind your ear, which is normal. He likes to neaten you up to make you feel better.

But he starts to use his thumb, wiping the tears coming down your face. You shocked as he cups your face, making you look into those icy cold eyes. He looks like the Iceman, cold and emotionless, but what he says very Brad.

“You’re beautiful.”

Then he pulls you into a tight grasp. He’s a whole foot taller then you, and you like the way he snakes his hands around his waist and slightly lifts off you your feet. His sheer presence is intimating, but for you; comforting. 

RAY PERSON-

THIS MAN. although a hick with a big mouth, he does know when to shut up and can read you’re emotions like the back of his hand.

He can just see the sadness swelling in your eyes and the way you pick at the foot at your plate and avoid all of needs for cuddles in bed. Heck, it’s making Ray sad.

So he does what he does best-not shutting up, well-about things he likes about you.

“Man! Look at my hot girlfriend/wife! There reading books by the liberal media, total smartie here! Oh! And they have a degree from-“

Ray will also beg for to your attention and follows you around like a puppy. Like you’ll be sitting on the couch and he’ll come rest his head on your lap. You ignore him, but he starts to twist and quote random movies so you finally give in.

Is Ray annoying? Yes. But did he make you smile? Also yes.

Also Ray is a cook, and knows all of your favorite meals. Of course, he sets the table, lights a few Mantown candles (yes there real google them), and comes to serve your meal with two plates.

“The most beautiful man/woman I have ever seen, the love of my life, the apple of my eye, the Avril to my Bizzy D-you’re hot pockets.”

It makes you laugh, which makes Ray happy. He feeds off of that attention. You sit in Ray’s lap, eating hot pockets, and watching The Best Damn Tour. You lean on Ray’s shoulder, and he leans right back.

POKE ESPERA-

Alexa play Whatta Man’ by Salt-N-Peppa BECAUSE! WHAT! A! MAN!

Poke is one tough mofo. He embodies the meme of “Good morning to my beautiful wife/husband and child everybody else get fucked”.

But like every baddie; baddie’s gotta have soft spots for there bitches. He has two; you and his daughter. And oh god he’s love the two of more then anything in the world.

Poke knows you and his daughter well enough. His daughter first notices that your not as enthusiastic and bubbly, and then she tells Poke. But Poke already knows because he’s observant and very in touch with his emotions.

So when he’s a work; he thinks and does a lot of self reflection. He wonders why you’re upset. Did he cause it? What can he do to make it better? He asks all the guys for advice, and even his own daughter.

An idea strikes! Poke’s got a lot of anger, so his therapist told him to express his emotions by journalling. But Poke learns that it helps him get everything out of system, so he’s a secret writer. Heck, he even likes poetry; and would kill anyone if they’d find out.

While off at work, small letters start to appear across you’re house. Some are long, some are short, but there sweet and make you’re day.

“I held the stars in my arms wen I held you”

“I can’t wait to kiss you.”

“Your eyes stole all of my words away”

And the covers of the notes are done by Poke’s daughter, covered in glitter and Lisa Frank stickers.

You confront Poke about this “mysterious pen pal” and Poke is like “I mean, your lips do sound tempting”

You know it’s Poke, and he knows it, but there’s something about the mystery that is very romantic.

WALT HASSER-

Here comes our favourie country pumpkin

Now let me say. This man LOVES you more then anything the world

Doesn’t wanna show you off (but he does)

So when you’re the slightest bit sad, Walt is even sadder then you are

Walt is someone that lives to receive attention, and also he’s someone that likes to give it. Especially to the love of his life!

Walt gives you things you actually need, and nothing that is materialistic. Growing up, his parents had a healthy relationship, and the apple clearly doesn’t fall far from the tree.

Waits on you hand and foot. A back massage? Done. A fuzzy blanket? Right on it! A specific burger from a joint that is thirty minutes away at three in the morning? Walt’s driving like a manic just for you. You have the man’s undivided attention.

“Walt?”

He stops whatever he’s doing and runs over, getting on his knees, “Yeah, what’s up baby?”

“Can you sing the song? Y’know, our song?”

Walt nods his head, now an eager puppy, and gets his gutair to play the song he wrote especially for you. And this is making me realize how painfully single I am oh my

RUDY REYES-

Rudy has an iv of respect woman/men juice. He always understands the assignment-and desires extra credit.

So whenever you’re down in the dumps, Rudy will drop everything and drag you into the car to go walk on his favorite trail. It’s ten miles long, but Rudy is a fitness freak.

First, you hate doing it. But the more you talk these long walks, the more you begin to enjoy it.

Sometimes there silence. Rudy won’t speak force you to talk. Talking is stressful, and Rudy will wait until you’re ready. The two of you holds hands, and Rudy has such a calming presence. It’s really hard to get angry at him.

You finally speak and tell Rudy you’re problems, and he listens and doesn’t interrupt. He’s got a hand on you’re lower back, or on your thigh. He’s basically you’re emotional support teddy bear and will always be a lending ear, or a total cuddle monster.

Rudy has the best advice as well. It’s always some yoga shit, but damn, those breathing  exercises do actually help.

EVAN “Q-TIP” STAFFORD-

Oh Q-Tip. My feral goblin son😭

I love him, but sometimes-things can fly over his head.

But when you start to ignore him and hide away from him, he begins to notice. And he HATES IT.

Like Christianson will ask him if he’s okay and he’ll literally quote a 2pac song and be like,

“I would drop all my girls for you, Walk barefoot 'round the world for you, Fly around like the birds for you, Thats why I wrote these words for you..”

Lilley is like “Brah we gotta help a homie out”

So the three stooges create Lovegate. The mission? to make Q-Tip’s partner happier.

Q-Tip is very artistically inclined. So with Christenson’s editing skills and Lilley’s camera, Q-Tip writes you a song and does a whole music video.

The man rents out a movie theatre venue just to show you. Of course, you’re blown away. It’s horrible and you can taste the autotone, BUT IT’S THE EFFORT THAT COUNTS. and q-tip has that smile on. you know what i’m talking about!

Doc Bryan walks in on the two of you making out and is pissed since all he wanted to do was see the re-screening of Bridemaids but NO, Q-Tip just had to rent out a theatre to show his partner a music video about them and then make out.

He see’s Lilley, who’s recording and asks to interview what Doc’s opinion on the music video, and this is what he’s says.

“I think my ears bled, but thank fuck those two aren’t acting like emo’s.”

DOC BRYAN-

The gif has a purpose. Trust me. SPEAKING OF THE MAN OF THE HOUR

Bryan, like Poke, is a very observant guy. He’s an angry motherfucker, and even a little insensitive, but ever since dating you; he’s tried to change.

He hates the world. People are shitty, and it makes him feel shitty that you’re sad because when you feel shitty, he’s in a shitter mood then he’s usually in

Knowing that his words might sound a little harsh, Byran knows how to distract you. Without words. After all, he didn’t work out for nothing.

Long hugs are you’re thing. The two of you will run into eachother, find a private place, and he’ll just wrap his arms around you. His big arms are protective, and he’s warm, and you just sink into him.

Sometimes, you’ll fall asleep. Byran sometimes will fall asleep with you, other times he’ll gently lay you down and put a blanket with a gentle forehead kiss.

When you cry in his arms, he’ll wipe the tears away. He can feel them against his arm, and he doesn’t know what to do. Crying girls/guys are not his speciality.

But when you squeeze his arm back, to let you know what your there and that you love him, Byran will freeze. He has no idea what to next with words. He’ll put his hand over yours, and turns out; it works well.

After this is all over, he’ll check up on you and ask you simply if you’re okay. You respond with a smile. Byran isn’t one for smiles, but for you, he shows a subtle smile back. Just to let you know.

[youryanderedaddy]

Lady Luck (pt. 1)

I was so hyped to write this lol. Heavily inspired by Kaiji <3

Tw: mafia mention, unrealistic potrayal of mafia, mentions of threats, implied obssessive behavior (will get more hardcore in the second part tho), mentions of gambling, kidnapping /not reader/

 You knew that you were a scum, a lowlife, a miserable loser without much hope in life - that’s exactly why you had no problem joining the deadliest underground paradise and following under the steps of the Lucciano family. They controlled everything - the casinos, the drugs, the guns, the whores, you name it - they provided it. And you had nothing - neither a past, nor a future. But everything changed when the oldest son Thomas decided to help you get out of the mud and step onto your legs - he gave you a home, a friend to return to, a shoulder to cry on when reality felt too painful and harsh, just too much to bear on your own. “Why would you do that for a stranger?” You had asked him once while tipsy, sitting by the hearth, a slight blush adorning your soft cheeks. “That’s easy.” The man had responded right away without giving it much thought. “You remind me of myself.”

 You spent long nights thinking about his words but never came to a conclusion - he was born into a powerful, wealty family, so it made no sense for him to have experienced rock bottom the way you had. And his small black eyes displayed such a variety of terryfing emotions - bloodlust, greed, sin and so much sadness. Why would a monster ever feel scared, you wondered. 

 Working for the Luccianos wasn’t especially hard or even dangerous - you ran small errands for them, took care of the younger kids, helped with insignificant deals, acted as a croupier when their staff was sick or missing or had to be taken care of, but one thing you were thankful for was how they never tried to force you into doing something you would never be able to forgive yourself for. Thomas was kind to you -  always so considerate, willing to listen, to understand how you felt even when the worlds you two lived in differed so greatly. He was supposed to be villain of the story, big and scary, demanding, taking whatever he wants without asking and never feeling an ounce of regret about it. And for a while, you were suspicous of the man’s every move - you were desperately waiting for the mobster to fuck up and show his true colours so you could let yourself hate him, despise him. And yet the sweet, sweet moment of revelation never came. You knew, of course, of the many evil deeds the criminal bestowed upon thousands of innocent people each and every day, but you never witnessed it with your own eyes and when the man was treating you like a part of his family, holding you close and giving you chance after chance to prove yourself, it was slowly getting impossible to view him as the bad guy. Perhaps you should have waited just a little longer.

 It happened during a warm, spring day. You didn’t expect it, you couldn’t. You had just finished your shift at midnight in the small shop you worked in, which belonged to Thomas’ mother, and were heading to the Lucciano mansion. It had been a particularly long and exhausting day, so you wanted nothing more than to feel the soft, silky, white sheets down your half-naked body while the quiet classical music took you to dream land and back. But upon opening the heavy wooden door, you quickly noticed something was different - there was no music, the big black TV in the middle of the hall was set to camera mode instead of the normal one, and it was awfully quiet. “They must have had to leave the country for a while.” You rationalised. “It has happened before after all.” You kept reassuring yourself while taking a tiny step towards the centre of the room where light was the strongest - it could uncover every hidden little detail.

 And then the TV was turned on. You shifted your gaze up, paranoia eating at you from inside out. Soon there was clear image on the massive screen, but what you saw left you speechless. There were hours of footage from your personal life - working, hanging out with friends, eating, bathing. What made the shivers down your spine run cold was a scene where a guy, your boyfriend, was kissing you, touching you, undressing you with his praying eyes. It was nothing unusual for a young woman to have a love life, but this broke the only rule Thomas had told you upon entering the house - you were forbidden from having close relationships with men, especially dangerous ones, and for the longest time, you had no issue living by that as long as you came back to the luxury and warmth the mobster provided for you. Until you met him - a charming, clever member of a local gang. You knew it was wrong and could cost you more than you were willing to sacrifice and yet you still gave in. It was your first time experiencing the highs and lows of love, so who could blame you when it was such a magical feeling, a mixture of adrenaline and opium. Alex made you feel like a real human being instead of someone just existing, leeching off the stronger, wealthier species.

 There was a shadow moving out from the corner, playing into your delusions. But soon enough you realised it was all a reality as none other than Thomas walked slowly towards you, clapping his hands dramatically, a sly smirk on his beautiful, scarred face. Did he...

 "Congratulations." The man started off, dark eyes set on you, slowly coming closer and closer like a big black hole, ready to swallow you whole. "You went and got yourself a little boy - toy." The criminal chuckled viciously under his breath, making you cringe at the crude nickname he used. The situation felt surreal and yet the fear and panic were already suffocating you, making you dizzy wish regret. "I wish you would have told me though... I never thought someone I hold so important would lie to me." The mobster kept rambling, waving his arms in the air theatrically, while holding a lit cigarette, but never moving it to his lips - it was just a prop, a way to create a thick smoke mist in your eyes. It was finally the hour of judgement.

 "What do you want?" You asked, faking confidence, desperate to take control of what was happening. It was a bizarre thing to see your dearest friend act in such a eerie, frightening way, almost treating you like one of his victims - nothing more than an indebted bastard or an unfortunate bystander, unlucky enough to catch a deal unfolding right behind the scenes. It hurt but you had forced this upon yourself and you had to fix it.

 "Nothing much, really." Thomas replied, finally inhaling the deadly smoke into his open mouth. He played with his collar for a while, as if you weren't standing there, scared for your life. "I just want to teach you a lesson in obedience, doll." The mafioso continued, circling you slowly, his heavy gaze never leaving your body. You felt awfully exposed even when all your clothes were present, covering every inch of your skin. With a swift snap of his fingers, the man summoned most of the gorillas that worked under him. Two of them were dragging your kicking, screaming boyfriend towards the centre of the room, but a quick punch in the guts managed to quiet him down. He looked terrified, his face bloody and injured, covered in dust and misery. But he was still alive and only that mattered to you.

 "I wanted to make this entertaining for all of us." The oldest Lucciano spoke out, his husky voice echoing trough the golden ceiling. He moved over to your lover and harshly pressed the cigarette butt against the exposed skin of his unprotected arm. The man cried out in pain, silently pleading you to help with his big, terrified eyes. And here you were, as helpess as he was - if not even more. "So I decided to initiate a little gamble of sorts, ya know?" Thomas winked at you, smiling with malice. You couldn't help, but recall all the times you two had played poker together, betting less than pocket change. You never understood why the man always got so excited despite winning such small sums, especially when his casinos already did well. But now you could see it clearly - he got off crushing his opponent, taking the victory under their noses. Money meant nothing. As long as he was able to ruin your mood, your life, the man was pleased.

 Soft white light lit up the furthest corners of the hall and you saw dozen square boxes, arranged in a circle. It looked harmless enough on its own, still they were stamped with Thomas’ symbol - a dove. You used to wonder why someone in the most dangerous depts of mafia would choose such an innocent, sweet signature pf representation and now the answer was right in front of you - that way it was easier to trick the enemy into thinking they were safe. And how wrong were they. 

 “As you can see, there are nine wooden boxes in total. They look exactly the same and on top of each one there is a hole.” Thomas stopped to point at them, the raw anticipation flooding his otherwise dull pupils. “Six of the boxes are empty. In the other three though, there are placed some of the most poisonous snakes in the world. One bite and you are dead.” The madman gave a loud, breathy laugh while your boyfriend squirmed uncomfortably in place, restrained by the strong arms, holding him down. “Both of you will take four turns putting your hand in the boxes. After every round the box would be closed off and you would be able to choose only from the remaining ones. ” The mobster grinned widely, looking at your horrified expression. You couldn’t believe that the man was willing to put your lives on the line simply because you had neglected one of his orders. “Now you may be wondering where the suspence is - after all you would probaby manage to hear the hissing from afar and avoid the place it comes from. Rest assured, my foolish little friends. Right now the snakes are heavily intoxicated and absolutely silent - which doesn’t mean, of course, that they won’t attack any soft flesh they see. If you die, that’s on you, but if you survive, you will be rewarded.” Thomas clapped his hands together and his man let go of your lover, resulting in his falling to the ground with a heavy bang. Thomas pursed his lips together.

 “Shall we get started?”

[kaitosimp]

As a filthy, filthy multi shipper I’d like to know both headcannons you have for all his pairings and why you like them so much, if you want to of course!

As soon as I read this, my mind started ranting so hard 😂 I will happily answer! And tysm for asking bc if being able to talk about kaito is rare, imagine how much ive talked about the ships i have with him, so im very happy rn!! 🥰 WARNING: dis gonna be long as hell 👁👄👁

OKAY SO the two main ships I have for Kaito are Oumota and Saimota, Saimota is my fave ship and Oumota is my fave comfort ship! The other ships I rlly like with him are Akamota, Amamota, and Momoharu, i pretty much read any fic that has him paired with someone but these are the ones i search for on my own whereas the others its a "i'll read 'em if i come across em" type of deal! So lets dive in 👁👄👁 (i have endless hc's for my ships so i'll only give a few or else this'll never end)

🌌🎭 Oumota 🎭🌌

Reasons: I am a goddamn sucker for thematic parallels, enemies to friends to lovers, and the rivals tropes 🌚 I dont even know how i fell into the oumota hole, cause i didnt consider it much in game, but after reading a few fics it just made me so happy! I love their banter and clashing personalities and stubborness lol, and goddamn, the post game/hangar fics for them are *chef's kiss*

Hc's:

-The way Kokichi tried to get Kaito to see he had feelings for him was by bothering/pranking the absolute shit out of him, but Kaito's dense to these things so he didnt even realize Kokichi stopped bothering other ppl to target him specifically

-When Kaito realized he had feelings for Kokichi, his initial reaction was "oh fuck oh no why him pls no-"

-Eventually Kokichi had to directly tell him to his face he liked Kaito cause Kaito wasn't getting the message at all

-Kokichi loves stealing Kaito's clothes, esp his jacket

-They argue a lot but its over the absolute dumbest shit like before they got together, its usually nothing serious

-Kokichi secretly loves listening to Kaito talk about space, though he teases Kaito about it

-Kaito's fave thing is to cuddle/spoon Kokichi, cause he's the perf size to snuggle with

🌌🔍 Saimota 🔍🌌

Reasons: CAUSE YES!!! From the beggining of Shuichi being the main, Kaito is there for him and supports him so much and makes sure Shuichi is okay, he's just so supportive and loving and helpful and motivational and he's something Shuichi def needed to move forward in the killing game! I just fucking love their dynamic and how they help each other and how they balance each other out as well, plus the whole hero and sidekick thing is adorable! AND OFC THE FAMOUS "i shouldnt be talking about another boy like that" LINE ASDFGHJKL ITS CANON OKAY

Hc's:

-Shuichi confessed first, it took a few times for him to get his feelings across properly bc each time he said something like "i like you" or whatev kaito was like "aw bro i like you too!"

-Kaito tried to get over his crush on Shuichi bc he thought Shuichi wouldn't go for someone like him (i hc him being kinda insecure and covering it up with that confident persona of his)

-Shuichi isn't big on physical contact, but he makes the exception for Kaito bc he's always so warm and gives the best hugs

-Shuichi is the only person who Kaito lets see him vulnerable, it took a lot of time but he eventually learned to stop bottling everything with Shuichi

-Kaito constantly takes Shuichi stargazing, its his fave thing to do and Shuichi is ever so happy to accompany Kaito and listen to space rambles

-Their first kiss was beyond awkward and Shuichi nearly fainted but they got the hang of it eventually

🌌🥑 Amamota 🥑🌌

Reasons: I literally saw an amamota fic on ao3 and it won me over oops- to me it just makes sense! They're both adventurers in a way and i love their personalities together, Kaito's boisterous nature would be a nice change of pace for the ever calm Rantaro and Rantaro's mellow nature would be something refreshing for Kaito y'know?

Hc's:

-Kaito always tried helping Rantaro catch up in classes bc he always misses 'em to travel and he was always the first one to welcome him back

-Rantaro got attached to Kaito and didnt even realize it until he came back one day and kaito wasnt there to greet him (cue disappointed rantaro and bAM thats when he realized)

-Kaito loves hearing about Rantaro's travels, he's always asking for pics and details

-Kaito confessed first, he literally couldn't take it anymore and just threw it out there while Rantaro was mid greeting

-Rantaro didn't tell Kaito about his sisters until about a year into their relationship bc he was scared Kaito would disappear too

-Rantaro literally re-visited a bunch of islands and countries in the artic circle just to take pics/vids of the aurora borealis for Kaito

🌌🎹 Akamota 🎹🌌

Reason: I just think they'd be sooo cute together 🥺 Kaito and Kaede are both positive people who try to help others and their personalities fit so well together! Idk man it just makes sense to me

Hc's:

-Kaito absolutely loves hearing Kaede play the piano, sometimes he'll sneak record her so he can listen to it whenever he's feeling down

-Kaede tries teaching him how to play the piano, instruments aren't his thing but he tries his best in the lessons cause it makes her happy

-Kaito's confession was accidental, he was just listening to her play when he blurted out how pretty she was, which led to an awkward confession talk with lots of blushing

-Kaede has tried to compose a piano piece that embodies Kaito's personality but she fails everytime, cause his larger than life personality is hard to capture perfectly

-They're both big on affection, so they're constantly holding hands and hugging

AND FINALLY, 🌌🔪 Momoharu 🔪🌌

Reason: THEY'RE GREAT TOGETHER OKAY 🥺 I just love how Kaito got Maki to come out of her shell and how he trusted her/accepted her!! He gave her the cutest nickname and befriended her and literally gave his life up to protect her, aND MAKI'S CONFESSION ABOUT FALLING FOR KAITO STILL MAKES ME CRY

Hc's:

-Maki confessed it ever so casually while mid training, which literally made Kaito fall over in shock

-Kaito loves Maki's hair, he could spend hours playing with it and he always helps her brush it

-Maki hates her scars, but Kaito's always there to kiss em and remind her how beautiful she is, he always traces constellations on 'em when they cuddle

-Maki's constantly scared she'll accidentally hurt Kaito, or that he'll get hurt bc of her past

-Kaito's very protective of her, just like Maki is of him

-Maki loves the sound of Kaito's voice, her favorite thing is to listen to him talk about space

W O W i am so sorry for this massive post 💀 I seriously tried limiting myself asdfghjkl oops

[weirdthoughtsandideas]

VIOLETTA UNPOPULAR OPINIONS, GO!

OH FUCK YES

Tomas was very whiny. I can understand how you could like him and why you’d want him and Violetta to be endgame, but tbh he was just. Always whiny and blamed everyone else. I lost all respect for him as an 11yo when I first watched the episode where he was like ”The kiss you gave Leon was my kiss. I can’t get over it”

Lara was NICE. She was SUPPORTIVE and WANTED THE BEST for Leon. She didn’t even dislike Violetta. Sure, she could make some comments towards her, but nothing was mean spirited. I don’t know why she just disappeard

Same for Braco, Napo and Luca. I absolutely support Tomas going back to Spain (lol) but the rest?? Where are you, come back!

I think Jade and Matias were just uneccessary after the first season. I feel like they were only there for comic relief, but tbh they just take up scenes I feel like other characters can get. Like BRACO AND NAPO AND LUCA.

It would have been pretty fun in my opinion if Esmeralda were out for stealing German’s money herself, without having Jade and Matias there. Like, her seeming like the perfect woman, and then as we go by, we realise something is not right, and we find out before the wedding exactly what has happened

I don’t mind the english dub, but it fucking sucks in season 1, sorry not sorry, and I think that is a reason Violetta never got as popular in english speaking countries. Plus, Violetta’s english singing voice is weird in season 1. But in season 2 her english singing voice got a complete GLOWUP, so I like that. But also, the english dub sometimes don’t translate correctly. They changed funny lines as ”Oh, a mexican” and ”What is up with this girl and astronomy?” to ”Oh, they’re arguing!” and ”I wish I learned astronomy in kindergarden”. Why??

I understand that, in season 2 when the characters were gonna sing in another language, the english dub had to come up with a new language. The only problem is that I personally don’t understand french at all and I didn’t know Camila was pronouncing everything wrong. I sort of wish the swedish dub (that I grew up with) had the original spanish songs, because we got the english dubbed songs, and swedish kids know english better than french, so I think we would understand if Camila pronounced english wrong

I did not care for Clement and Gery at all and I sometimes forget they exist

Sometimes I think Angie would’ve been happier if she ended up with Pablo

The last 10 episodes of season 2 >>>>> all other episodes

The end of ep75 of s2 always makes me emotional. Just... Violetta crying on stage, not being able to sing, LEON SAVES HER. Leonetta may not be the most stable couple but THAT IS LOVE

And also ep76-80 in season 2, where everyone is so bummed out and sad. I feel for them and I get so happy every time when they DO finish the song, Vilu DOES get her father back, everything is GOOD again.

The Roxy and Fausta storyline was always weird to me, it felt a bit ooc. But it was at the same time kind of funny. I think what I would do if I rewrote it is to still make them dress up as them, but not to spy on Leon. They... just dress up for another reason. Maybe to sneak into the kareoke bar because they weren’t allowed there anymore or something

Honestly season 3 is just in general a little off to me. Nothing is really the same. Maybe it’s this... less colorful filter it has on it? Idk it feels like s3 has this lighter shade on it. Maybe to reflect that the characters are older now. Or smth

I also feel like some characters in season 3 just changed personality. Violetta is much more stubborn and short tempered than before. They try really hard to show that DIEGO HAS CHANGED, HE IS NICE NOW. Which, yeah, I get it, but it’s just a little funny seeing him be a manipulative stalker and now he’s sweet Diego on guitar

I tbh never cared about Francesca’s love life. Everyone was like ”OMG DIECESCA IS MY OTP” and I’ve been like ”??? Fran hated him last season what?”. I’m not hating on Diecesca, they are a lovely couple, but I just never really... cared? I didn’t care about Marco much either. They were sweet? Then he couldn’t stop sending flowers and I’m like ”dude calm down”. And Fran’s relationship with Tomas wasn’t very good. The only relationships with Fran I cared about was her friendships and her relationship with her brother

Priscila is SUCH a psychopath and the second she showed her true sides I wanted to hug Ludmila. Please I hope Ludmila seeks therapy. Poor girl.

Season 3 felt like a fanfiction but the biggest fanfiction in this universe is Tini the movie. We don’t talk about that. What WAS that. I’m so confused. If they wanted to make a Violetta movie they could make a ”reunion” movie or smth, not WHATEVER THAT WAS. Though the visuals and angles are pretty nice.

Llamame with the cowboy hats are the funniest thing I have seen in my life and it felt so off from all the other songs, but ESPECIALLY the version with cowboy hats really gets me cackling

They wasted potential to have LGBTQ+ characters. I get it, it’s Disney, it’s a kids show, it was made in 2012. But I still just feel like... the POTENTIAL. There’s so many characters that gives off queer vibes and I- I don’t know. I feel like the majority is bisexual and then some of them are fully gay/lesbian and the rest are either straight or homophobic

I have since the ripe old age of 11 been a Leonetta shipper, and I still have a very soft spot for them. But recently I have been like ”Francesca and Violetta? Would make a good pair. Germán would approve, Francesca’s not a boy”.

I’m glad Maxi and Cami didn’t end up together, but I also wish they explored that storyline a bit more. Because they kind of just ended it, but then it was still a thing with Marco being mad at Francesca after she didn’t want to tell him Camila kissed Maxi, but then they just... dropped it. Never discussed it ever again. I feel like it just ended on a weird note.

Maxi and Naty are super cute, I love every time Maxi has to turn his cap backwards to kiss her. But Naty also gives off huge lesbian vibes, so now i’m conflicted

I think Gery’s half shaved eyebrow is ugly and now you know

Leon is very chaotic and I think we don’t appreciate him for that. Like, searching his girlfriend up on his motorcross to tell her ”let’s skip school and go and almost kiss at a secret spot in a public park”, calls girlfriend’s overprotective father ”future father in law” before running away, that whole ”LoVe Is LIKe a tHuNDEr” scene-

Diego had more chemisty with Leon than with anyone else in s2

I don’t remember Milton at all and I forgot he was a teacher. What did he do? Like... he yelled at students and that’s all I recall. Then he disappeared? What???

I have lots more but now I can’t come up with more

[iliveiloveiwrite]

Running

A/N: Here is my entry for @obsessedwithrandomthings​ 500 followers celebrations! Congratulations Dee! You more than deserve this! The prompt I used is in the summary, but I have also bolded it in the text. Thank you so much for letting me take part! The gif doesn't really match the theme of the fic but I searched ‘running’ and it was the best of them lol. I’m also less than 10 followers away from 800 so this is exciting!! As always, I hope you all enjoy!!

Summary: “Run away with me,” You plead, hands framing his face, “It’ll be worth it.”

Pairing: Remus Lupin x Fem!Reader

Warnings: descriptions of injuries, mentions of death and anxiety, vomit - there is a lot of worry and anxiety in this, so please don't read if you don’t like, but I have tried to wrap it up in a fluffy fashion!!

Word count: 1.5k

Your stomach had been a ball of anxiety all night. Nothing anyone said could dampen the fear that was crawling its way up your throat. Something was going to happen tonight, and it wasn’t going to be good.

Your fears are proven correct when Sirius lands in the hallway, holding up a drastically bleeding Remus. His blood stains his white button-up shirt and drips steadily onto the floor.

The scream is caught in your throat. You look wildly at Sirius, demanding an explanation. Sirius explains quickly; they had been tailed as they were following their own targets. Remus threw himself in front of Sirius to protect him from the Sectumsempra curse.

“I couldn’t take him to St. Mungo’s. I don’t know who works there, but I’ve already called for a Healer I can trust,” Sirius shudders, murmuring the levitation charm straight after, following Remus up the stairs in a hurry.

His blood stains the carpet in the hall and would stain the stairs too, but it was the last thing on your mind as you hurry behind Sirius. Remus is laid on the bed; his face contorted in pain, barely conscious but still aware of the pain lancing through his body.

Wordlessly, you conjure clean towels from the airing cupboard, holding them to the cuts across Remus’ chest and arms. Sirius takes a towel from you, holding it to the wound across his stomach.

The Healer arrives in what seems like hours, but it could have been minutes. Your eyes do not leave Remus as you press towel after towel to his cuts, trying to stem the bleeding despite knowing that nothing but magic would help.

Sirius’ hand on your shoulder has you stepping away from the love of your life, letting the Healer complete his work. Your hands are covered in Remus’ blood; your clothes too, are ruined. You barely make it to the toilet to empty your stomach. Sirius is there, holding your hair back, muttering comforting words to you. You press your forehead to the cold porcelain, trying to take everything in now that the adrenaline was leaving your body, but your brain couldn’t comprehend what you had just been witness to.

You force yourself to stand; pushing down the fresh wave of nausea as you make your way back into the bedroom, to Remus. He lies on the bed; his body entirely healed, but deeply asleep.

“I’ve had to give him a strong sleeping draught. He lost a lot of blood and whilst I was able to heal the injuries, there’s going to be some damage internally. He needs to be asleep for it to heal which, with his lycanthropy, will heal in a few days.”

“How long will he be asleep then?” Sirius asks, learning the information to relay to you later. He knows that at the moment, you would not be listening to word being said. That all of your attention would be focused on the man on your bed, asleep and no longer in any pain.

You refuse to leave his side. They all try to coax you from your room. Sirius promises he’ll stay with him so you can shower, but you refuse. Harry tries his hardest to get you to come downstairs to eat, but it doesn’t work. Instead, he leaves for a moment before coming back with a plate of food. You nibble at it, but the nausea soon returns.

The first day blends seamlessly into the second and there’s no change in Remus. He lies on his side of the bed in clean clothes and clean sheets, sleeping peacefully. You admire him from your spot in the armchair across the room; this would the first time in a long time that Remus had managed to get a solid block of sleep without being interrupted by the order or the lunar cycle. You think it every time but in sleep, you see the Marauder in him. You see the teenager you had fallen in love with one afternoon by the Black Lake. The teenager who had stuttered through asking you out but soon found his confidence once you had accepted.

For years it had been you and Remus. The only survivors of the first wizarding war, Remus claimed though it pained him to say it.

On the third day of your vigil beside the bed, Remus groans before blinking against the bright light of the morning. You’re out of your seat in an instant, lurching to the end of the bed with tears in your eyes. “Remus, you’re awake! How do you feel? Do you need anything?”

“I’m sore, but I’m okay. I don’t need anything right now.”

You sag in relief, “I am so happy you’re awake, dear. That was the most terrifying time of my life.”

“Even more than the time you saw me as a wolf?” Remus tries to joke, but he winces instead.

“This isn’t a joking situation, Remus!” You cry, “Do you remember what happened?”

“I remember being followed and then jumping in front of Sirius and then blinding pain. I passed out then, I think.”

Your hands grip the bedpost at the end of the bed, “Sirius brought you back here and we called in a Healer. You were hit with the Sectumsempra curse and your blood was everywhere, and I couldn’t stop it-” You break off suddenly; your words getting caught in your throat.

The sudden urge to run overwhelms you. Your eyes dart around the room – to the suitcases, to the wardrobes. A plan begins to form in your head; a few more days healing was all that Remus would require before he’s stable enough to apparate. You know of a place where you couldn’t be traced where he could spend a few weeks or so recuperating before you run for real.

The desire to leave it all behind takes over. In that moment, the only thing you could ever want is a longer life with the man lying on the bed in front of you. If this war continued, how long would you have? Optimism in this situation is vitally important but as your eyes return to Remus, running over the war-weary, pale face of the love of your life, all you want is to go.

To go and never look back.

“Run away with me,” You start, rushing to his side, hands framing his face, “It’ll be worth it.”

“Where would we go?” He asks, his eyes bright with possibilities.

“Anywhere – the country, the coast, abroad. Run away with me Remus, before the war swallows us whole.”

“What about the Order? Darling, we can’t leave them.”

“Fuck that, Remus. Look at yourself! You can barely move.” You stand, gesturing to the four walls in which you stand, “These last few days have been my own personal hell; I didn’t know if you were going to wake up. For the first time in my life, I have had to face a possibility of a life without you and I won’t do it. Not again. Run away with me, Remus.” Your eyes are wild as you plead to him, beg to him to consider doing this.

Remus’ eyes search yours, looking for what, you don’t know. You know the minute you’ve lost the battle, and you would be remaining where you are. “We can’t.”

“Why not?” You ask brokenly.

“You won’t leave Harry, love. You’re his godmother – you won’t let him face this war without you, you simply won’t.”

The tears that were previously lining your eyes now overflow onto your cheeks. You look at Remus through watery eyes, not bothering to stem the flow. “You can’t do this to me again, Remus. I will not live in a world that does not have you in it, do you understand?”

“I understand, darling.” Remus holds his hand out for you. You stumble over to him, desperate to touch some part of him. With a light tug, he has you sat next to him on the bed you share. “I’m here now,” he whispers, “I don’t plan on leaving for a long, long time.”

You sniffle, “Good. I didn’t like the look of my life without you.”

“What have I missed then; in the three days I’ve been asleep?”

You look at him, somewhat sheepishly, “I wouldn’t know. I haven’t left this room.”

Remus frowns at you. “Darling, please tell me you’ve eaten and taken care of yourself.”

“I’ve eaten a little, but I didn’t want to leave you and I didn’t want to let anyone look after you.”

“I really did scare you, didn’t I?”

You nod, “Beyond scare, Remus. I couldn’t think straight, I don’t think I’ve thought a coherent thought since Sirius appeared with you in the hall.”

He brings your entwined hands to his lips, pressing kiss after kiss to the back of your hand. “I am so sorry, my love.”

“You don’t need to apologise, Remus. You did nothing wrong.”

“Nevertheless. I am sorry, I didn’t think before throwing myself in front of Sirius, and I should have.”

“You were protecting your best friend.”

Remus shrugs, but winces at the stiffness in his joints, “I will not leave you like that again. The minute I’m out of this bed I’m speaking to Dumbledore, demanding lighter missions. I’m too fond of this life to leave it prematurely.”

Tears start anew as you lie next to the man you so dearly love. Gripping his hand in both of yours, you press it your chest, “I’m too fond of you to let you leave it prematurely.”

**************

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[sanchoyo]

danny phantom, season 3 episodes 3-6 thoughts!

see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3

-johnny was actually pretty civil with danny and left when he asked! thats nice. also, SKULKER?? HAD A FRAMED PICTURE OF EMBER?? oooo fuck wait had they established they were a Thing Before?? I dont think so. thats weird. its like that country boy/goth girl meme lmfao. I think i am going to choose to ignore this new info and pretend I didnt hear it. 100% unrelated to the jazz/ember fanart I already drew and posted....😳

-LADIES NIGHT EPISODE THIS IS WHAT ITS ALL ABOUT. wish it didnt really center around the guys or them being pissed at them, but. willing to bet this was written by men lol

-THEY ERASED ALL THE MEN??? meanwhile, jack and danny are fishing at. silent hill or something. im glad jack is trying to read a parenting book and making an Attempt. (theyre at lake erie, but, they made it actually eerie...thats fun)

-the girls alt outfits...cute. EMBER MADE A NEW SONG TOO!!! kinda. jazz being one of the backup singers and being AWFUL. NOOOO

-'how are we going to get kitty to blow a kiss?' 'she'll have to think there are still some males in town!' ...i dont know how to break it to you, but I dont know that a 100% het girl would wish for all men to Begone. I think. I mean im not a het or a girl so I dont really know for sure. she Is probably Bi tho. esp having the other ladies in town chanting NO MEN!!! excitedly............(then again, the kiss is to get Rid of men, so, she probably would have blown it at the ladies only if they were actively trying to attack/stop them, so...I MEAN. THE DRESSING LIKE DANNY BIT WAS SO EXTRA)

-I feel like an all female cast ep couldve been way way way way cooler than that was. like. why was it still somehow all about Men. ...anyway. (where was valerie...)

-next ep opens with the observants, and, way way more of them than I expected...existed? I mean I guess them being a council/jury of some kind is what I expected from their first appearance (bc at that time they were basically TELLING clockwork to kill danny, not asking,, so I figured they had SOME kind of authority) but. there were so many. anyway, here goes vlad! letting his own hubris go brrrr. releasing a weather ghost for political gain! #justvladthings

-okay say what you will about him (he IS an asshole) but having an umbrella with his own face on it and more prepared to share is SUPER FUNNY. and him being fanned by huge wads of money by his bodyguards. SO ineffective but so Dramatic. He UNDERSTANDS that if youre rich you need to be. you know. obnoxious and kinda eccentric about it! fuckign hate when rich people are boring about it. I would trust vlad with nothing except to not be a boring rich asshole who wears...fucking khaki or some shit. man knows his Presentation Skills. and that 'V' chair in his mayoral office. is that fucking embroidered?

-maddie get your MAN PLEEEEASSSE. IM SO EMBARRASSED FOR HER. the way jack stays simping for this man. in FRONT OF HIS WIFE!!!! ...my god its like a love triangle. jack clearly loves vlad, who loves maddie, who loves jack. jack fenton is at the very least bi, right................. this is an OBSESSION . 'THE V MAN COMETH'???? i...my god. (also, on a serious note, to have a friend THIS SUPPORTIVE...and still be SUCH A DICK TO HIM (TRYING TO KILL HIM AND STEAL HIS WIFE??) NOT COOL VLAD. JACK IS YOUR 1 AND /ONLY/ HYPE MAN. if someone loved and supported me THIS HARD...LIKE. CMON DUDE.

-STOMP the fucking GAS, JACK

-this would make a great shirt design, looks like a metal band design! we love The Maelstrom

-oh, so vlad did in fact get a mansion in amity park. and its purple! good color choice! not as flashy as a CASTLE or MURDER CABIN, but still pretty eccentric, which I appreciate.

-...vlad knows the difference between picasso and da vinci? in the ep last post where we were watching him fail at conquering every historical time ever he didnt seem to know history well enough to like. be effective...was vlad taking art history at college?? (was he an art MAJOR??? we never DID KNOW WHAT HE WENT TO SCHOOL FOR. I kinda assumed business because in the masters of time ep he was still rich without ghost powers so he had to have..known something about business or something, right...but also, art and or theater FITS HIS PERSONALITY. possibly also something science-y, I guess, but I always felt like he got roped into that, esp how pessimistic he was about the ghost portal in the flashbacks to college, like, i felt like he was just there for maddie and was uninterested/un-invested at the time...)

-THIS GHOST JUST ELECTROCUTED MADDIE (THE CAT) BITCH!! THATS MY FAVORITE MADDIE!!! vlad going after vortex and being ~shocked~ .....WHEN. WHEN WILL YOU LEARN. THAT YOUR ACTIONS. HAVE CONSEQUENCES!!!

-the way this random man with a camera sees the mayor laying in an alley covered in TRASH AND DECIDES TO TAKE A PICTURE HAHAH

*snap* this ones going in my cringe compilation!

-vlad 'if we're going to defeat vortex, we're going to have to do it together!' *immediately dips after dropping danny off in front of vortex* JKASDFHKJHJKN

-DANNY CAN DUPLICATE!!! ...he couldnt even attack with it, but he DID IT!!! INTO (4) OF HIMSELF!!! SO PROUD!!!!!!!!!!

-'THE ROLLER COASTER EMOTIONS OF A TEENAGER THREATEN MY PLANS!' ...0 self awareness of his own dramatic moodiness. incredible, how dumb this man is. its very close to circling around to endearing, if he was less of an asshole. at least its very very funny to see danny shooting him with tiny lightning bolts anytime he's even slightly irritated! vlad you should be nice to danny anyway. this is what you GET

-...making sandwiches and ice cream and playing video games with your nephew is a totally normal thing. WHY is vlad acting like this is the end of the world. if you were a GOOD UNCLE YOU WOULD ALREADY BE DOING THESE THINGS!!! bitch I make my nephew food all the time and dont forget what he does and doesnt like. if u didnt know danny didnt want tomatoes, thats on u. if u, a grown adult, are gonna piss of the 14 yr old by not letting him win, u deserve to have to pay for the arcade machines he ruins because he now has uncontrollable storm powers because YOU THREW HIM INTO A FIGHT WITH THE STORM GHOST. fuck u vlad. paypal me $400,000 while ur at it tho. (also, gamer vlad confirmed)

-VLAD CAN COOK THOUGH???! I assumed he had...people working for him that did that. I mean. billionaires usually dont do that. then again, we've only seen those vultures working for him (and I guess the dairy king was AT his old mansion, but it was never really clarified if he worked there...I think he probably just Hung Out and they Enjoyed Cheeses Together. thats what I think, I dont think a KING would be working for anyone and also the dairy king was nice <3) but then again he would be a private person and we cant have anyone accidentally finding Ghostly Things, so...still, that's hilarious. pour one out for that really cute banana split that got ruined 2 seconds later

-vlad just fucking picking danny up and THROWING HIM AT VORTEX TWICE WITHIN LIKE A MINUTE. JUST ABSOLUTELY LAUNCHING HIM. BITCH THATS MY SON BE CAREFUL!!! HES GOT ORGANS AND THINGS!!!!

-danny seeing those animal commercials and feeling sad is the biggest 2000s throwback so far. i legitimately had to change the channel or walk out of the room when those came on bc id CRY AND BE SAD ABOUT THEM FOR DAYS AFTER. fuck those commercials and fuck that IN THE ARMMMS OF AN ANGELLLL song 😭

-'vlads ego almost got the town destroyed!' yes danny thats the entire episode. the entire series anytime vlad shows up honestly. this episode was just him being really embarrassing the entire time, and, me laughing about it. 10/10 would laugh at him again

-NEXT EP WE HAVE A SHAPESHIFTING GHOST?? I've said it before but shapeshifting is the power I would want when asked those 'what superpower do you want' questions...its the Best power! this guy looks like a homestuck character. ive never read homestuck but thats the vibe

-I love every time we see tuckers family, they are by far the most functional family. and dash has a lil chihuahua!!! named pookie!!! i am crying (I've had 3 chihuahuas, so I am very biased, but...) AND HE WATCHES THE ROMANCE CHANNEL WITH POOKIE. POOKIE I WILL DIE FOR YOU YOU SWEET LITTLE BABY.

-danny can lift a bus! I shouldn't be surprised, but i am proud of my son. hes got lil kid fans. i am going to cry about this

-JAZZ KEEPS A SCRAPBOOK WITH DANNY'S LIL HEROICS AND NEWSPAPER CLIPPINGS!!! we've actually seen it on her floor before, but I didnt realize it was a scrapbook!! thats sooo cute.

-...and danny has to stand there listening to his parents saying danny phantom sucks and is a 'filthy ghost' and calling him egotistical...i am once again stealing their kids!

-THIS GHOST RIPPING JAZZ'S SCRAPBOOK!!! ILL KILL YOU. SHE WORKED HARD ON THAT!!! BITCH

-yes, maddie, the one with red eyes is For Sure Actually Your Son. ignore the, red eyes... (CLEARLY she hasnt watched the other 2 eps where danny has been evil, she doesnt know red eyes= evil!!!)

-'billy fenton'.......................

-danny being stuck as phantom in his own house, no way out is a fucking NIGHTMARE. his parents pointing giant weapons against him and SHOOTING AT HIM. THIS IS A HORROR MOVIE.

-NINE INCH NAILS POSTER.

-this is the most screenshot of all time

-amorpho turning into mr. lancer because hes 'someone no one will want to be around' BUT HES WRONG, I WOULD BEFRIEND AND HANG OUT WITH MR LANCER SO FAST.

-tucker dressing as danny, now I have the full Tucker set of him being sam and also being danny. also saying 'the ghost...uh...RIPPED MY FACE OFF.' and then running. SMOOTH. NOT AT ALL CONCERNING TO ANY PARENTS.

-sam accepts the toast from jack. and then 2 seconds later is like 'why am i eating this.' THIS SHOWS HUMOR IS SO UNEXPECTED SOMETIMES ITS REALLY GOOD. and then the scene after, mr lancer running into his ghost doppelganger and being like 'YOURE GORGOUS' THEN FAINTING. I AM CRYING. AND DASH FAINTING TOO.

-sam disguising herself as danny again to help tucker run from the fentons. but leaving him shirtless in the streets. incredible. 'plEASE DOnt NOTice MY FACELessNESS I MUST LIVE IN EXILE' this episode is destroying me the humor in this show is exactly my brand of corny and cheesy

-the impromtu story made up by danny and amorpho to explain stuff to the fentons. my god they are both such bad liars. but amorpho is a good egg. wish danny wouldnt have said he didnt wanna see him in town again!! I want him to be reoccurring. not that thats gonna matter since I'm almost done with the series, but the idea of this being the Only Time We See him is :(

-NEXT EP SAYS STARRING MARK HAMILL??????!!! hello ! mr . joker....mr. star wars.... I feel like I should be. idk. taking off a hat im not wearing in respect. I shouldnt be surprised tho bc hes in a lot of cartoons as a very good voice actor, and dp has already had a lot of talented ones so I've been looking out for ones I might know, but....mr. hamill....

-sam has her own greenhouse, names all the plants, and says thank you to them (in the languages from where the plants are from) whenever she harvests from them. thats SO cute. and her lil gothy lunch box...

-and danny's lil red fuzzy lined jacket!!! ive said it before but every time the characters get alt outfits im like :D

-danny has ice powers now!!! THATS WHAT FROSTBITE MEANT. HE KNEW SOMEHOW WAY BACK THEN

-THIS SHOW NEVER LETS YOU FORGET VLAD IS A BILLIONAIRE, HUH.

-danny's lil 'holy hibiscus!' first off the 50s batman swearing is hilarious. 2nd. my username is from the flower sanchoyo hibiscus, so, shoutout to ME this ep. hi :)

-EURGH UNDERGROWTH MAKING EVERYONE PLANT ZOMBIES. HIVEMIND PLOTS SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF ME. and this dude made the city SO overtaken so quickly like how long was danny asleep?? oh god

-evil fucked up sam! now the whole trio has gone evil at some point! the voice actress did a really, really good job with making her sound like a zombie...

-frostbite's paws are so so so big compared to danny. oh my god. i want to hug the snow dog...

-the far frozen has an advanced medical stuff!!! very cool. very smart snow dogs

-im so glad danny has a friendly ghost snow dad to explain this new power and teach him!!! this is so sweet. DANNY'S GHOST SENSE WAS A PART OF HIS ICE POWER?? OOOH. COOL. we love a training montage!!!

-danny saying if he cant defeat overgrowth, that he'd want to stay with frostbite...oh my god...do you think this is the first real supportive adult figure in his life (I am NOT counting his parents because they threaten him on the daily even if they dont realize it.) I mean mr lancer is a Teacher, but he was also nice but this is different, but this is a GHOST WHO IS WILLING TO HELP HIM with his powers and also will help him when hes injured and is so so nice and comparatively so much more mature than 90% of the adults in this show!!!! god. dad frostbite is my everything.

-the framing and lighting this episode, and all the angles...they went all OUT and it looks really really good. this is my nightmare scenario, tho. like, FUCK zombies and dead city zones and hivemind shit. and using the humans as 'nutrients for the children' i am going to THROW UP.

-MALEFICENT VIBES WITH THE HORNS AND GREEN EYES! this costume kicks so much ass. sam is now mark hamills daughter, I guess.

-danny's ice powers making his eyes blue!!! thats neat. and him going for the roots underground was SO SMART. i will not stand for danny ever thinking hes stupid, hes SO smart.

almost done with the show... :"( thats a sad thought!!!

[summoner-chan]

Sorry, I guess I should have been more specific, I WAS talking about Darius lol. Aight then last two questions: Shiro and Durga.

And don't worry about the long winded responses, I love it when people feel comfortable enough talking about themselves, and I can, like, feel their excitement as I read. :)

I tend to worry about how much I talk since that experience with someone on discord (the same server as those two passive aggressive peeps) asked me to not to post a wall (what they meant is that not send a long ass one whole paragraph of words) because I was talking a long time to type and send-

Mind you, my phone was lagging at the time there was a lot of typos happening without my control so I had to retype them. I remember it being something they asked what's about that art I drew?

Other than that, they were pretty mean, maybe because they were part of the admin teams of the discord or they're just a natural born dick :/ and I mean by natural born dick when someone just said good criticism and everyone who's friend with that person just-

y'know bit his head off saying things like "lmaooo nobody needs that shit critism 🤪. Look at this guy shitting on (username) 😂😂" and there's them going all "I don't need your damn critism, I don't fucking care. I ask critism when I want to and I didn't ask for yours so you can stfu" like okay....no need to offended by that... And I found the critism on the spot though? I couldn't see your linework from all those shading-

Anyways, I'm being off topic so let's hop to the Housamo Ask Game!✨✨

[Shiro]

Favorite book or favourite book series? Oof, truth to be told, I'm more to a manga/comic book reader 😂😂 but I do enjoy reading books once awhile!! I only own two horror light novels which are in my native language so I'll try to translate their title??

The very first book I had was Kakak Kemboja (Kemboja in English is Frangipani) which translates to Big Sis Kemboja/Sister Kemboja (not in a Nun way-) and it was about a young boy meeting one of the tenants in the old apartment he lived in.

After losing his father and his house, he and his mother was forced out by the late father's mother and brother who planned to make their house into a homestay. This caused the young boy to stay at the apartment alone while his mother was working to bits but don't be sad, Big Sis will always be there for you

Spoiler, Big Sis is actually a ghost 👻

In Asian culture, Frangipani is one of the notorious for having it's scent being related to ghosts. If you're alone and you smell something fragrant, it's best to get out of there as fast as you can along with to not comment about the scent on the spot. I tend to smell fragrant things (doesn't help that I can see things ksjdjwkdje) even in my own house so I just- Yeet myself from that place

The second book is Somniphobia which is the Fear of Sleeping. It's about an office guy who likes to read scary and horror books at night until morning which causes him to get late for work most of the time. He was starting to get bored since he's already read all of the books he owned and nothing seems to catch his eye until his old friend suggested him a book, Somniphobia. Little did he know, the more he read the book, the less sleep he had. To be specific, he's started to develop Somniphobia himself. .

I only read light novels because once I bought the book, I immediately read it, to the point I finish it one day which just frustrates me to no end. I read super fast and everything just gets crammed to my head and I'd have to reread again to make things sensible kskskksksdj

I'm not a manic like my big sis though, she has two shelfs full from her novels. Her favorite book series is the Clockwork series, the Shadowhunter series which is written by Cassandra Clare and she almost have the full set now- 😂

[Durga]

To be sentimental or to not be sentimental-

Well then I'm going to the sentimental path skksksks

I'd actually want my family get back together again but you know, I can never take in another man who's not even my biological father to begin with after what I went through with said man

Having to cope without having a dad for 2 years now is sad but it happened, I know it's not my fault even though another part of me insists that I should have done better. I cry so easily whenever there's things that reminds me of him, I can't handle scenes where a man is lying in bed in the hospital, I can't handle seeing fathers being very affectionate to their children and I can't handle going to hospitals again

Thinking about marriages is what hits me the most because in my religion, the bride's father will be the officiant for the wedding, handing his daughter over to the groom's care so to say. That doesn't mean that I won't be able to get married without having a father to be the officiant but rather the officiant will be replaced by the bride's brother or uncle (brother of the father) and if there none, a court religious officer will be the officiant

It's just that thinking how lucky your eldest sister (from the first wife of my late dad + divorced) was able to have your late dad as the officiant of her wedding then when it was only you and your four sisters (two from the same mom while the other two is from the second wife), the chance was already gone. I won't see my late dad at my own wedding, only having it being replaced by my brother or uncle. It's not the same, it won't ever be the same because he's not there to see his grandkids or will he have the opportunity to be called grandpa

It just hurts knowing that he won't be there to be a part of the big parts of my life

But it happened and there's nothing I could change, I'm already quite happy and grateful to have mu late dad's wife and her family taking care of me and my two sisters despite there are times when we've fought but nonetheless grateful

I don't have my biological mom with me at the time since she was forced to stay in her own home country due to her citizenship, I dearly miss her but...due to personal reasons, I can't help but hate her from time to time. She does the wrong things and it scarred me badly, hence why I am unable to give her my blessings for her to get married

That's all I could say since if I were to say more, things would get pretty long and it's just me ranting out :P

Thank you for sending in ask in!! Feel free to send anymore like usual~

[quasieli]

top six: fictional characters that give you gender envy, flowers, little things that make you happy and d&d moments :D

Ooh lotsa questions!

Gender Envy:

1) Bow from She-Ra (2018). Something about buff athletic dude who wears crop tops and is soft as hell is very Gender to me.

2) Vax from Critical Role. Pretty boy, kinda goth rogue? That’s sexy as hell and I wish that was me. 

3) In a wildly different idea of gender envy, I’ve been thinking about it lately and @quantum-lesbian’s character in the Frostmaiden game I’m in with them, Ambrose, is Big Gender. Beautiful non-binary drow with a starry and kinda witchy aesthetic that dresses super grandly and ostentatiously no matter the occasion? Yes please.

4) Pete from The Unsleeping City, specifically season two. I adore season one Pete but season two Pete that works in a queer bookshop and has a teapot arcane focus, is artsy and is unapologetically a trans man who doesn’t give a shit about gender roles? Sign me the fuck up.  

5) Beau from Critical Role. Buff GNC lesbian mixed with academia, but like academia from the prospective of a grad student with ADHD trying to learn everything about their special interests? A+, I love her and I’m jealous. 

6) I’m gonna cheat a lil bit for this last one. I know the prompt is fictional characters, but Julia Lepetit and Jacob Andrews in their Hitman streams? Simultaneously both of them were Gender for me. Jacob esp felt like that for me, which is weird cause dresses can make me dysphoric, but I am also slightly envious of the Dude in a Dress type of gender presentation. 

Can you tell that I’m a confused trans masc enby

Gonna put it under the cut from here cause oof, there’s still a lot more.

Flowers:

1) Big slut for Sunflowers, always have been, always will be.

2) Fun fact, my dad’s family used to own a flower shop (in like the 70s, so I never got to see it :(), and one of their big things was hydrangeas. My dad has always loved them and now I love the snowballs too!  

3) A recent favorite, the Baker’s Globe Mallow. It’s a type of flower that only grows from the soils of forests that have been affected by wildfires. It’s a simple little flower but I love the idea of something beautiful rising from the ashes after tragedy. A little dramatic, but I’m queer, ofc I’m dramatic.

4) Roses are another important flower to my family (Rose was a family name for a couple generations), and ya know, they’re a classic. 

5) There’s this beautiful magnolia tree in front of my house that blooms with the most beautiful white and pink flowers every spring, and it’s one of my favorite things to see every year. 

6) There’s so many different types of Lillies and they’re all very pretty, but the Purple Stargazer is prob my favorite.

Little Things That Make Me Happy:

1) My cat, Maddie. She may be a cranky girl at times, but she is also very sweet and will always be my baby (even though she is 12). 

2) Not a little thing really, but my best friend. Just getting a sweet/silly text from her or the two of us chilling in a room, sitting in a comfortable silence because we just like being together, nothing better. 

3) Baking, esp if I’m doing it for others. I’m not much of a sweets person myself, a little treat every once in a while type person, but I love baking. It’s a very relaxing process for me, even when it can sometimes get stressful, but seeing people enjoying something I made, especially something that brought me great joy to make, is simply the best. 

4) In the same sorta vein, crafting and other art, but that’s a bit more personal. I love making things for others, but art, particularly drawing, is something I do more for me. It’s such a great feeling when you can get into a really good art mood and just sink yourself into a project. I love it.

5) My plush toys. Yes, I am a 23 year old, no I will not stop loving my plushies. I just got a few new friends, which I made a post about recently, and they such good cuddle buddies. However, there is one king amongst them all. I have this old, beat up christmas puppy beanie baby, on his tag named Jingle Pup, but I just call him Jingle. I had one version of him since I was like 6, but he currently lives on a shelf cause he is very beaten up and fragile, but his “brother”, who I got when I was 8, is still in kinda good shape and is currently chilling on my chest as I type this lol.

6) Again, not a little thing, but it’s important to mention; D&D. The game itself is such a joy, but truly the best part of it is the people. I love creating stories and memories with people through this weird little game. Truly one of my favorite things to do.

D&D Moments:

These are all gonna be personal moments, rather than anything from actual play shows/podcasts. RC is Reforged Campaign, where I play Saube, and FM is Frostmaiden, where I play Sparks.

1) RC - Meeting Mahety, Saube’s girlfriend. We met her way back in session 12 and we are now up to like session 73. Saube saw her and was immediately big heart eyes at her but also felt a bit awkward and shy. So, being a game a dice, I decided to roll. 10 or higher, Saube would talk to her, 9 or lower, she’d stay put. I rolled a 17, 17 is now a lucky number for me. I love Mahety and I’d die for her. 

2) FM - This was an insane fight that should not have been so crazy, but in a fairly early session, my group went up against an angry druid and her awakened animals. So much batshit stuff happened in that fight, and we unfortunately lost our bread loving bard (RIP Agneyis), but one of my favorite combat turns happened in this fight. Our artificer, Omaren, has a robe of useful items and one of the patches on it creates a large pit. Thinking quickly, Omaren tore off the patch, slid it under one of the dire wolves we were fighting and created a looney tunes style pit under it, allowing us to take it out easily via pot shots. Such a clutch move and such a funny visual, especially because the dire wolf kept failing the checks to get out of the pit.  

3) RC - Saube’s Zebrith (I will never remember how this actually spelled RIP). So, for context, Saube ended up with a death curse (long story) that mechanically meant they had disadvantage on any death saving throws. Scary as hell, need to get that fixed! So, Saube and their party had to be smuggled into another country to talk with some religious leaders of a goddess known as The First, the goddess of death. They were told that Saube would have to go through the aforementioned ritual, which included her soul leaving her body for a short period of time. During this ritual, her friends had to call back to her, to say things that would bring her back to her body and I still cry thinking about that game. That ritual was not only important for Saube bodily, but spiritually as well. After that ritual, Saube officially became a cleric of The First! 

4) A real sappy one, RC - Saube meeting all of her friends. Anyone who follows along with the rantings on my blog probably knows how important this game is to me. I met this random group of strangers on tumblr and formed a D&D party with them and now, a year and a half later, I honestly think it’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I know that sounds silly and dramatic but not only has this game brought me so much joy and comfort, but I also gained a group of really amazing friends who have been nothing but amazing since day one. As much as Saube knows she can depend on SICL, I know I can depend on my group of weirdos lol. We both love our friends very much and even though we’ve all been through some crazy shit, we wouldn’t change it for the world.    

5) RC - Just playing Saube in general. I really didn’t intend for it to be this way, but Saube is very much a reflection of myself. She is the first long term character I have ever played and so much of me is in her. I try not to treat D&D like therapy, because that’s unfair to my DM and fellow party members, but playing Saube has allowed me to work through some of my own problems, especially social anxiety, in a lot safer of an environment. It isn’t so much that I’m asking this game to help me fix my life, but playing out these scenarios that, in the real world, would make me anxious or make me freak out, I can stop, take a moment to breathe and work out these issues in a way that makes sense to me. Playing her has led me to understanding myself a bit better, as well, and that’s truly such a wonderfully unexpected gift from this whole experience. 

6) Lastly, a silly one: RC - Getting a crit 6. The last session of this game got real interesting. Saube’s party ended up in the ethereal plane and magic got real fucky there. So, any time any of us tried to cast a spell, we’d roll a d20, not look at the result, and then try to guess what number rolled. The closer to the number, the better the result. A few times, a few people managed to get within like 3 or 4 of their roll, but oh the power I felt when I rolled a 6 (on Saube’s die!) and guessed it correctly! So, not only did the spell (Bless) work, but it worked super well. So instead of getting +1d4 to attack rolls and saving throws, Saube and two other party members got +2d4 to attacks, saving throws and skill checks. So powerful I broke the rules of D&D lmao. 

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #483

“wasn’t faded, not jaded, just a kid with a pad and a pen and a big imagination”

Do you want to sue someone right now? Er, no. Have you ever been in level 10 pain (the worst pain imaginable)? I cannot describe the pain I was in when I had an infected cyst drained by applying pressure to it, and there is NO WAY in Heaven or Hell that I was numbed enough for the procedure. I was shrieking and sobbing and cursing like I was being tortured. I sure as fuck consider it "level 10." What was the last part of nature you took a picture of? A flower. Which family member’s birthday is closest to yours? My youngest niece's. Which holiday is your birthday closest to? Valentine's Day. Have you ever tried seaweed? Yes, and it was disgusting. Have you made your own mask to help prevent the spread of the virus? I just use your typical blue one you get from the doctor's office. It works perfectly fine, so I don't see reason to spend money on a unique one for me personally. What is the ugliest animal known to man (in your opinion)? Blobfish alsdkjfaklsdjflwke Describe the most romantic moment you've ever had. No, because I WILL cry. If you were an astronaut, which planet would you visit? Can I pick Saturn AND Jupiter? I mean, they're neighbors, lol. What's one word you want people to use to describe you? Caring or strong. What show did you last watch? Squid Game. It is SO good, like I haven't been this into a show in a LONG time. Girt and I finished it recently and I already hope there's another season. Name three things in your room that others probably don’t have in theirs: A snake, a limited edition Silent Hill: Revelation Japanese flyer, and a massive collection of meerkat plushies. What’s something you can cook or bake like a pro? Nothing. What deodorant do you wear? Secret. Besides sleeping, what do you do in bed? Sigh. Essentially everything. I'm still pissed as fuck how trying to stay in the spare room during the day went. If you smoke weed, what do you usually do after you get high? If you don’t, what would you do if everyone around you were smoking? I don't smoke. I've been in the situation where everyone around me was high though, and I just kinda sat around awkwardly. Have you ever been to any of the places featured on Man vs. Food? Is there any you’d like to go to? I don't watch that show, so I wouldn't know. What are three good things going on in your life right now? What are three things that you would change? Good things: 1.) I'm in a healthy, happy relationship; 2.) I've lost a couple pounds and I'm sure will drop more without soda; and 3.) uhhhh... I can't think of another. Things I would change: 1.) my mental health; 2.) my physical health (or just at LEAST the position my legs are in); and 3.) me being jobless and just generally doing nothing. Does the person you like have any flaws? Recently, he actually warned me about one of his biggest: he pretty much never knows what to say in serious situations. I was venting to him about something, and while I didn't think about it at all, he wanted to let me know that he's bad with words when it comes to certain situations and instead acts through like hugs and stuff. I was just glad he was there to listen without complaint, so I didn't mind. I do consider it a flaw, though. Has anyone ever given you a ring? Why? Yeah; Jason just gave me a pretty ring for our anniversary one year. I don't have it anymore though. If you ruled your own country, what type of government would it have? I'm really not educated enough on most government types to answer this with confidence. From what I DO know (which is extremely little), I support democracy. What was your last serious conversation about? It was honestly the sweetest thing: I was talking about my weight issues w/ Girt, including the fact I was finally losing some, and of course he was super supportive of that, but he was concerned he didn't make it clear enough that he'd love me completely regardless of my weight. Called me a gem no matter what and I deadass nearly sobbed. ;___; Is there a city that you have a particular fondness for? If so, what city is it and why? Chicago, I guess. It's the only big city I've been to and it really star-struck me with just how different and extravagant it is in comparison to what I'm used to. Are there any gnomes in your yard? No. I've never understood or liked gnome decor. If you had to spend one day in any movie storyline, which one would it be? Uh, I would say Alice in Wonderland, but I'd prefer a queen not being after my head. Living in the universe would be cool, though. Who was the last person close to you that died? Did you cry? Jason's mom. I cried for days and days. Do you know anyone who owns a boat? My dad, and I'm sure I know many others. Here in the country, you've got plenty, plenty of people who enjoy going out on the water fishing. What’s the worst name your mom has ever called you? I don't know. What’s your most recent obsession? Squid Game is litty What was the last type of bird you remember seeing? A robin, I think. List all the things on your bedside table right now. A lamp, a scented wax warmer, my big water bottle, a glass of V8, a little Spyro figure, and some plug outlets attached to an extension cord. Who is the biggest show-off you know? I don't know. I try not to associate with those kinds of people. Do you take the pickle off your burgers? No, I love pickles. What colour is your bed frame? Brown. Have you ever kissed someone you met that day? No. Ever talked to someone that was drunk? Yeah. Did you have a good birthday this year? Yeah. Would you ever want to swim with the sharks? Nah, I don't think so. Ever given a cop an attitude? No. Have you and your current/last significant other ever discussed your sexual histories? No; we're not at "that point" yet so I don't think it's really necessary. Have your religious beliefs stayed the same since you were a child? Definitely not. Are you named after someone? No. Who do you need to forgive? Myself, really. My disgust of and hate towards myself really isn't doing me aaaaaaany good. What is one thing you admire about each of your parents? My mother is the most selfless human being on this planet, especially when it comes to her kids, but really just people in general. It is honestly incredible. For my dad, I am extremely proud of and admire his recovery from severe alcoholism. Addiction is no fucking joke, but he beat it. Who is someone who drains your energy? My nephew, ha ha. But I love him to death and beyond. Do you spend more time on your own or with others? Are you happy with that? I'm nearly always on my own, and I like it sometimes, sometimes not. I know I'm alone too much. Do you know anyone who has been diagnosed with autism? My niece, a friend's daughter, and I KNOW there are others. I know a surprising number of people, just no other ones are coming to mind atm. Who was the first person you had a sleepover with? Are you still in touch with that person today? My first best friend Brianna. We're friends on Facebook, but we don't actually talk. Could you cook an entire Christmas or Thanksgiving Dinner entirely on your own with no help from other people or recipe books? God no. As a teenager, what did you spend most of your pocket money or allowance on? It was very seldom I had money, so barely anything comes to mind. I guess a snack or drink from a gas station visit or something. Are there any common “popular” foods that you don’t particularly like yourself? Have people ever told you you’re odd/strange for disliking that particular food? Oh boy, there's lots. I don't like fried chicken, to name just one that shocks people, especially with where I'm from. As for the second question, oh yes. Likewise, are there are any commonly hated foods that you love? Uh, probably not. I'm WAY too picky. Do you own a lot of store loyalty cards? I don't. What did you have for breakfast this morning? Kix cereal. Do you have any scented candles lit at the moment? Not right now. When was the last time you left your house? When will be the next time you go out? Yesterday; Miss Tobey took Mom and me out for lunch at Cracker Barrel. Ummm I'm not sure about the next time I'll leave the house. Who as the last person you argued or bickered with? Mom. Do you have anything planned for the rest of the day? If you’re about to go to bed, what are your plans for tomorrow? Girt's coming over later. Why did you last attend a doctors’ appointment? I got a Covid test; for some reason, you needed a full-blown appointment for it where I went. Negative, btw. Does it bother you when dogs lick you? Nah. Have you ever lost a nail completely for any reason? What happened? Not completely, no. What color eyes do your pet(s) have? Venus' are black, and Roman's are blue. What’s your favorite way to eat chicken? As chicken tenders. Do you prefer cow's milk or another type of milk? Cow's. I really, really hate that it's the only kind I like, because the dairy industry is disgusting and I don't want to support it, but goddamn am I so picky. When was the last time you changed any of your piercing jewelry? Wow, eons. If you could have a years’ worth of something for free, what would you pick? Uh, money? What have you found the hardest about the current pandemic? I don't really leave my house like, almost ever, so it hasn't affected me very much. Nevertheless, the thing that I've had the hardest time with is handling ignorant fucking people that don't trust people with Doctorate degrees. And what about the easiest? Has anything improved in your life because of what’s happened? Well, I like being able to just pick up groceries from the car, ig. If you have multiple pets, do they get along with each other? Are they related or even the same species? They both ignore each other, really. Roman will watch Venus slither around occasionally, but not often. Do you have any plans for Christmas yet? I'm sure we'll go to Ashley's place first and then Dad's later that day or the next day, like always. Are there any accents that you really struggle to understand? Heavy Southern ones. Have you ever tried any of those meal replacement shakes? Yeah, I actually really like the Equate chocolate one. What’s your favorite thing to take photographs of? Are you actually any good at photography? Nature and animals, though I don't really get many opportunities for the latter. I'd like to think I am, since it's what I WANT my career to be... What gifts are you hoping to get for your next birthday (or Christmas, whichever one is coming up next)? Monetary help with Venus' future terrarium that I've been talking about for fucking months, as well as help with new glasses. Maybe it's selfish, but it kinda sucks man, I'm being an adult and focusing on the things I badly need and won't be asking for anything for my personal pleasure, like a PS4, new laptop (mine is starting to have problems, yay), or another tattoo. Do you suffer from any form of motion sickness? No. Do you contribute regularly to any Facebook groups at all? Not by making posts, no. I just "like" stuff and rarely comment. When was the last time you weighed yourself? Were you happy with the numbers you saw? A few days ago, and no. I never am. Do you have any sort of “secret” goals or dreams, where you think about doing something a lot, but haven’t told anyone about it or actually made steps to achieve it? Maybe something you aren’t quite serious about, but still like to consider? Hm... I'm sure there's something, but idk right now. Does your town/area have a farmer’s market? Do you ever buy your vegetables there rather than grocery store? Yeah, they're common 'round here. I've been to one once or twice. The fresh fruit, like the strawberries, are THE best. Is there something that people complain about that just makes you roll your eyes because you think is not a big deal and you would gladly trade your own issues for it? "I can't breathe with this mask. :(" Shut up. I assure you you'd rather breathe through a mask than try to with Covid. I understand that a small percentage of the population really can't tolerate masks, which is fine, but goddamn.

[hobiwonder]

crazy rich asians | 02

Genre: Chaebol!BTS. maid!reader. Smut, fluff. mild angst. 

Pairing: Jin x reader, Jimin x reader, Hoseok x reader, Yoongi x reader. Possible future pairings. 

Warnings for this chapter: language. mention of porn. 

Words: 6.5k+

Summary: You overhear something you shouldn’t. Now some of the country’s most powerful - and rich - men would do anything to keep you quiet. 

a/n: I'm back finally lol. this chapter moves along the change in feelings of the different characters. main pairing becomes more clear and also just sets the scene to the final few chapters. please let me know what you thought?

(dorks!!!!!)

“Wow.”

“Yeah...” Yoongi lets out a hefty breath he’s been holding since Jimin had mentioned the Will. He’d known his friends were multimillionaires. But never quite the exact aggregated amount of their wealth. Which he now knew was A Lot.

“Wait so let me get this straight, your dad has to marry Amber in order for you to get the money - what if he doesn’t?”

The unexpected question - that Jimin or Jin didn’t even take into consideration - makes Jin smack his younger brother on the back of his head. Light enough that Jimin’s exaggerated flinching was uncalled for.

“He should if Jimin here, can keep his dick in his pants.”

“Please! You slept with her before me, don’t act so self righteous.” Jimin’s scowl only earns him another glare from Seokjin.

“Once. Whereas you will probably make her your booty call.”

“Well I have someone else in mind for that now.” The smirk on his face is mirrored by Yoongi who just shakes his head at his friend’s unadulterated behaviour.

“Good. Call her from now on.” Jin doesn’t seem to catch on to who Jimin is referring to but it does remind him about your departure not too long ago. Hoseok seems to have the same idea when he speaks up before him.

“Speaking of, you assholes better have made sure y/n wasn’t outside at least this time.” His eyes don’t flicker away from his phone as he says so, making no move to get up and check if you had in fact, left.

“Are any of you going to check?” Jin knows the answer but somehow expects a different outcome. Negative.

“Not my house.” Yoongi is leaning back, stretching his arms behind his head to get comfortable.

Shaking his head at his useless friends and even more useless brother - he opts to have a look himself.

“I’ll be back. Meanwhile you peasants think up an idea on how to retrieve that will.”

“Excuse me?” Hoseok’s eyes are wide as if Seokjin told him he was an illegitimate child.

“Hyung you don’t have the inheritance yet. If speaking solely of net worth, mine is more than yours.” His record producer friend’s shit eating grin is well earned but doesn’t mean it doesn’t make Seokjin want to get this plan in motion sooner.

“Yeah yeah..” He’s not paying much attention to their mindless chatter about Jimin’s impromptu vacation.

A few strides later, he’s opening the golden doorknob carefully. That way if you were outside - which would be quite dumb of you he thinks - he’d be able to catch you red handed. Right outside the door, he doesn’t find anyone. He lets out a sigh of relief at the peacefully empty hallway. No servants or butlers and definitely not your cute little frame hovering in places you shouldn’t be.

Just when he’s about to head back inside - he hears the faint noise. Immediately, his feet are going towards it - not quite being able to pinpoint what exactly was that he could hear. Was there someone else lurking nearby? God. Were the staff always this nosey in this house? Then again he would know if he paid much attention even if he saw nothing wrong with not doing so.

Jin strains his neck further, hoping to see whoever it was, without being all too visible as he stood behind the massive vase in the hallway. The next sound he hears though, inevitably someone talking - worries him just slightly. Walking forward until he was nearing another room - there you were, sitting against the wall with your back hunched over. Seokjin couldn’t see your face but your voice was telling enough to let him know of your distressed state. You were sitting on the floor, hand covering your mouth to seemingly hold back a cry.

Who were you talking to? And where was the girl who not even half an hour ago blackmailed his brother and friend?

“I-I’m okay. I just miss you.” Your quaint, undoubtedly overwrought whisper in to the phone makes his chest constrict.

“I’ll let you know. I have to go now Nana. I love you.”

He’d never witnessed someone so rawly feeling emotions that weren’t joy or ecstatic even. The most he was used to was anger from his father. Frustration from his friends. Mostly bliss on his own. But never something like this. You sounded defeated and scared. Were you really crying because of him? He hadn’t anticipated that immensity the empathy would flood into him. He’d never really gotten upset and nor did he believe his brain had the chemicals to make the reaction happen which would allow him to feel said emotions.

He watched you - and heard - let out soft whimpers into your lap. His hands suddenly started to sweat and his feet itch to walk forward but he remained rooted in place. A few moments later, you were getting up, dusting your frumpy uniform before storming off to who knows where with a determined stomp to your steps. A small grin tugging at his lips at your determination. It was more than likely that you were feeling upset and intimidated by the situation you found yourself in. So why did Jin still not call it off when he went back inside the room?

He couldn’t answer that even if he tried. Maybe he was a masochist. Maybe he really did not have any regard for anyone but himself. It certainly wasn’t because he wanted to keep tabs on you.

“You good brother?” Jimin instantly notices his older brother’s more sinister expression.

“What are you looking so happy for?” Jin counteracts before Jimin can try and analyse him any further. He didn’t do well with emotions other than hunger, ecstasy and horny.

“Did you hear? It’s all over the news.” Hoseok is laughing obnoxiously loudly, shoving his wide screen phone in Jin’s face.

A familiar face is greeting him right next to his eyes - if only Hoseok would move the offending phone slightly back, Jesus. Taehyung’s bright blue hair is the front page of the news article. His hand is up a model’s skirt and face plastered on hers. The next set of pictures is him being spotted at a museum with his Posse before they tastefully switch to him at an elite rooftop club. His friend was always the centre of attention and quite obviously thrived on it.

He was very liberated and couldn’t careless of the strict rules his family lived by. Boy would he be in trouble if he comes back before his newest scandal dies down.

“What’s he done now?” Yoongi’s just shaking his head - being the older brother of said boy and rightfully being pissed off. He usually took the heat for his younger brother’s shenanigans.

“Just shoved his face in between a model’s tits for all to see. Nothing new.” The tick in Yoongi’s voice is all too familiar. He always had to do damage control while Taehyung partied the night away. He felt for his friend sometimes, he really did.

“Well, shit. What’s the damage?”

“If i’m lucky, just more shame.” Yoongi’s gaze turns back up to the ceiling, hands stretched behind him to cushion his head.

“Hyung, you really don’t have to keep being the martyr for him. Let him face the music when he gets back. Grow the fuck up.” Hoseok can’t help but feel like a broken record whenever he gives yoongi advice.

No matter how stubborn and wilfully isolated Yoongi remained from the rest of the world, he insisted on protecting his younger brother as much as he could. It would’ve been admirable if it was a rarity. Saving Taehyung’s delinquent ass was like yoongi’s day job at this point.Yoongi just shook his head, not dismissing Hoseok’s advice completely even if it seemed so that way.

“I’m more selfish than you think Hoseokie.” What did he mean by that? That story was for another day.

“Ladies, ladies,” Jimin eyes his older brothers, holding out his hands in a gesture to settle everyone down, “Let’s get back to business. Taehyung whoring around is like being surprised to find out that a lion eats meat.”

“What the fuck kind of analogy is that?” Hoseok is chuckling at Yoongi’s taunting but Jimin barely blinks.

“What is it Jiminie? You’ve had another revelation?” Standing and pacing was not something Jin had ever done before. And he wasn’t about to act like a commoner just because of a little maid who’d caught him off guard.

Taking a seat back at the couch, Jin takes the scotch from Jimin before settling his attention back on to the matter at hand.

“We need to use our newest asset.” Jimin’s devilish smile is nothing short of mischievous.

And Jin was very familiar with that look. He knew that his little brother was intrigued and despite having his eye on the prize, no doubt, he wasn’t thinking all business anymore. There weren’t many things that Jin and Jimin couldn’t have. In fact, he would argue that even if he tried to spend all his money - he wouldn’t be able to. Jin was only 27 and yet he felt like he was on his ninth life - all previous deaths were due to absolute boredom. Women flocked him to without him having to bat an eyelash, had too many servants to count, too many places to sleep and too little to want. Could he get bored of being rich? Not ever. But was he bored with things he could do that came with being rich.

That’s why he was always actively looking to spend his wealth on hobbies and objects that were unattainable. Dangerous. Something that was forbidden to even a man like him who could have anything. And at this very moment - it was you. It was hard to pretend that Jimin wasn’t also well aware of that fact. Hoseok and Yoongi were merely held back because they hadn’t received the ‘go-ahead’ from either himself or Jimin. That they were allowed to play with such a pretty thing like you. They were all good-looking, incredibly so, and extremely wealthy. It was a default that people wanted to be as close to them as possible. Not you. When Jimin had crowded your space, you looked ready to bolt. Like you would be anywhere but in that room with all three of them. And when your body had reacted quite the opposite way, clinging onto Jimin and Hoseok - it was he could do, watch in awe. Jin rarely saw people at war with themselves when it came to physical intimacy with himself or any of his friends.

He’d slept with his fair share of attractive house staff but never encountered someone like you. And that had to be why he was inexplicably attracted to you. Nothing more. The look on Jimin’s face meant he was too and he wanted to play with his meal.

“What do you propose? Shall we take turns trying to maximise our profits from said asset?” Hoseok’s shit-eating grin accompanied with his schoolgirl giggle annoys Jin more than usual but he doesn’t mention it.

Letting the younger ones have some fun, with his fists clenched. He needed another drink.

“Well, I found out from Amber that there have been some staff changes to the Manor and I wonder if our little maid being here has something to do with that. Minhyuk doesn’t work here anymore.”

“And?” Yoongi sounds just as bored as Jin probably looks.

“And, you little shits, he used to work in father’s wing. Know what that means? Hm?” Jimin is looking around at his older brothers like they are supposed to be on the same page.

And while it makes sense that the other two who didn’t live here were lost - it baffles Jin that he didn’t know of the change when he’s been here far longer than Jimin. How does he know so much in so little time? Though it clicks for him just before Jimin opens the pandora’s box.

“It means that y/n works there. She’s the only new hire and none of the other staff have been moved around.”

“And let me guess, you want to seduce her into breaking into father’s office and snoop around?”

Jimin is gasping in mock shock at Jin putting two and two together like the drama queen he is. “Precisely. Knew your brain hadn’t hibernated permanently.”

“Yah, shut up before I expose you and get you cut out of the will entirely.”

“You won’t. You’ve got too much to lose.” Jimin is tilting his head innocently, a juxtaposition between his words and actions.

Jimin was a slithery snake, that much Jin knew. Hell, he was often proud of his younger brother’s extraordinary mind but even Jin knew that he was sharp underneath his soft exterior and disarming smiles. Which meant that he’d made up his mind to include you into their devious plan. But something about the phone call Jin had witnessed before, he felt a little uneasy in the pit of his stomach. The feeling is all too foreign and unfamiliar that he has to place a hand on his abdomen.

“Well boys, just let me know when my turn is. She was too cute for me to pass up on. Now if you excuse me, I have to pick up Taehyung.”

Yoongi’s passive face turns up into a scowl at the mention of his younger brother. “Good. At least he’s bringing back enough of his brain cells to know not to ask me any favours for a while.”

“That’s why he called me, hyung. I’ll drop him off at the Hilton.” Yoongi murmurs a thanks at Hoseok, glad that his friend could sense that Yoongi would rip Taehyung a new one unless he took some time to cool down. He already had to hang up on his father’s personal secretary twice since the news broke out.

“Later sluts.”

“Bye hyung.” Jimin is waving Hoseok goodbye before he finally sits, looking expectantly at Jin.

“So, what do you say? You in for some adventure? It’s been a while since I fucked someone I wasn’t supposed to.”

His pursed lips would have you think he was talking about a physics phenomenon and not sex. “Yeah? And what do you suppose is called when you sleep with your future step-mother?”

His smile is blinding. “The family jewels. I’ve just as much right as father now.”

“Jesus christ.” Yoongi mumbles before putting down his half empty glass. “I’m just glad I won’t have to merge with that obnoxious knob my father keeps insisting I do business with to expand. Tell me what’s needed of me and then wire me the money. No need for details that don’t concern me.”

Stretching like a feline, Yoongi takes his leave. Leaving Jin to marinate a little more in his conflicting feelings toward Jimin's pet project. Well, he did willingly take part but that was before the five foot something intrusion in their plans. There wasn't anything particularly extraordinary about you. So why was Jin finding it so difficult to separate himself from the situation like he usually was able to?

"Jin hyung?"

"Yeah?" Pretending that he wasn't distracted by any thoughts of you, Jin stares back at Jimin's smirking face. He's holding a sheet in his hand, waving it around like he's going to cast a spell.

"Let's figure out the logistics here shall we?"

"You do that on your own brother. I've got some business to attend to." The clink of his heavy scotch glass is definite as he sets it down.

Jimin doesn't argue and that in itself is suspicious. Giving Jimin a pat on the back, Jin heads out with a mission to let off some steam at the gym. Just knowing you were somewhere in the Manor put him on edge and he wasn't about to flail like a teenager in front of you should he encounter you again.

"I'll do that. I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Maybe."

___________________________________________________________________________

"Y/n, Please make sure you are supervising the staff as they move through the rooms. I'd like you to personally go through the checklist before my inspection. Mr. Kim will be spending a lot more time in his home office starting the week after next and we cannot afford the Manor to be anything short of impeccable."

Anders was talking just as fast as he was walking, causing you to almost have to jog besides him as he fired off the list of chores. it was odd enough that you still had a job, let alone climbing up the rank and supervising other staff. In Mr. Kim's wing no less. For a split second you thought you were part of some joke and any second you'll be laid off. But Anders had all but looked through you like it was any other day of work.

"And please, take note that due to the eventful nature of Mr. Kim's work, we will be expecting many visitors therefore everything needs to be tidied up before and after Mr. Kim's work hours. you will be rostered on to take care of his wing, including the guest rooms, living room, library and the restrooms. Mr. Kim's office will be out of bounds and I shall take care of that room. understood, dear?"

Anders is looking at you warmly for the first time today and like a true airhead that you'd been acting these days, it takes a few seconds for you to nod at him.

"Yes sir. Will I be working the regular hours or will my shift hours be changed?"

"I presume it will be on a weekly basis for a little while. For this week you will be required to tend to Master Kim's quarters after 5pm and get everything set up for the next day. Of course, with the exception of today."

His smile is kind and lighthearted. You know he isn't this forthcoming to all of the staff. Perhaps your age being the closest to his own children gives you the soft advantage. Nonetheless, you are thankful for the little bit of gentleness, guidance and just a light hand ever since you'd started working here. And maybe Anders has a little bit of hand in you getting this sort of promotion in such a short amount of time.

"Okay. I will get to it right away." Tucking your notebook in your apron, you nod at him.

"Y/n?"

"Yes?" Your heart is thumping too loudly, too fast in your chest. The events of yesterday flooding in your mind.

But Anders didn't seem to display any anger so far.

"I say this for your own safety, dear. Try your absolute best to keep a respectful distance between the people of the house and yourself."

"O-Okay." Spinning right around, you bolt.

There was no way Anders didn’t know something. He had to have known that something incredibly inappropriate happened, right? Did Mr. Kim’s sons complain about you? There was no way they probably didn’t make you seem like a creep. Snooping around their house like paparazzi. Just thinking about the events of yesterday made the blood rush to your face fast enough to make you slightly dizzy. It still felt like a fever dream. Something that was far too.... astounding to have every happened to you. You could count on one hand how many times something memorable happened to you in your short life. And yesterday was equally memorable as well as terrifying. This uncertainty you felt with your place in the Manor was something you didn’t want to feel much longer.

The more you thought about it last night, the more angry you became at yourself. How selfish could you be to put your job in jeopardy? Especially when you have so many people counting on you to keep it for a long while. You had stupidly put yourself in the midst of some money war happening between very powerful people. Now you’d become someone for them to play with or at least that’s what you felt like. Yes the kissing was great, your traitorous body soaked up the physical intimacy like a starved nymphomaniac but at what cost? Tossing and turning, sleeping had been futile.

And maybe your red eyes gave Anders some indication about what had been troubling you. Still, you were adamant on keeping yourself away from their traps. No matter how beautiful and alluring their words were. No matter how beautiful each one of them were. They were unattainable and a lowly worker like you was never going to be someone worth their respect. Head filled with many thoughts, you march towards the crowd of people awaiting your instructions.

You will not think about them. Especially him. Kim Seokjin.

______________________________________________________________

A week goes by much easier and uneventfully than you had expected it to be. And the more days that pass, the more that one encounter feels like a fever dream. Like it happened in the fantasy realm. Something twisted conjured up by your brain after it got tired of your insipid life. You’d managed to speak to your grandma on a regular basis to make sure she wasn’t worried after your out of the ordinary tearful conversation with her. As usual, your mother had not been interested in talking with you and it hurt you just like it always did. Though it was becoming so normal and expected that you suspected your numbness to it soon. You awaited that day.

“Miss. y/n, would you like me to change the glasses from the liquor table? One seems to have broken...”

One of the staffer’s, Jihoon, trails off as he inspects the damage. Your eyebrows furrow at his observation. You left everything in place last night before leaving. No broken glass anywhere. Was someone here after hours? Mr. Kim’s schedule didn’t show any scheduled meetings after 6pm - which was unusual anyway as he finished up by 5pm most days.

“That’s odd. I’m sure this wasn’t broken.” There are a few shards of glass peeking out from the bottom of the liquor cabinet and sure enough, when you bend down, you can see the remains of the glass pushed underneath it.

“Oh boy. Be careful when you clean that up Jihoon. I’ll go get a new set.”

“Maybe one of the masters we’re here.” Jihoon shrugs absentmindedly, proceeding to vacuum all the shards and the mention of the other men in the house makes you jolt like you’re the one vacuuming glass into your bare hands.

“Y-Yeah. I’ll be right back. You’re free to go when you’re done. I’ll do the last sweep before calling Mr. Anders.”

“Okay! See you tomorrow noona!” You say your goodbyes before heading to the storage room. Jihoon had been here overnight so you wanted to let him rest as quickly as possible.

Feet rushing you out quickly, it feels like every breath is being stolen out of your lungs while the memories from last week are rushing into your empty brain. Why couldn’t you get yourself together? It was one incident. Yet, your whole life seemed to revolve around it. It was getting pathetic. You hadn’t seen any of the boys since then and the more days passed, the more it was clear that they played around with the staff on the regular. You weren’t anyone special. The more it made you angry that you let it happen. How dare they treat you like a common groupie? You may be just a household worker but that didn’t mean these rich trust fund babies should treat you like this.

All the comebacks you could have said then were coming to the tip of your tongue now. Especially for the tall, handsome eldest with lips of sin. Lips that didn’t touch yours and annoyed you so much for some reason. If you saw him again, he was going to get an earful!

Your emotions were getting the best of you. So much so that the force with which you were pushing in the key with to unlock the  storage room was rattling the mahogany door rather loudly. Thankfully, before you disturb the peace down in the basement even more, you’ve opened the door. It’s only the second time you’re here as you were not allowed the key before. Seeing as you managed Mr. Kim’s wing, it was given to you by Anders to keep with you at all times.

Locking the storage room again after you’ve grabbed a new case of - extremely expensive - glasses, you make the tread back to the meeting room. The Manor is quiet at this time in the morning. The only activity most likely happening in the kitchen while breakfast is prepared. You were on time for all your tasks regarding Mr. Kim’s wing, a spring in your step as you thought about having a cup of tea with the cooks in the spare time you had. The next task was to get everything ready for tomorrow’s Family dinner that Mr. Kim was hosting. Thankfully you didn’t need to be there. You may have been promoted but you were not allowed to stay for the intimate family gatherings as only the very essential staff stayed. You could understand given the influence of the people present in the home and how anything could be made a spectacle if it were to get out.

“Oh Y/n, glad I caught you.” Anders is walking towards you down the hall.

“Mr. Anders.” He’s smiling as he approaches, eyeing the box in your hands.

“Everything looks good. I have inspected the room. I presume these glasses are for the liquor cabinet?”

“Oh, yes they are. Did Jihoon call you? I was about to do a last sweep before paging you.”

His kind smile greets you as he shakes his head. “No need. Everything looks remarkable. You are doing a wonderful job, dear. Join the others in the kitchen for some tea and muffins. They smell especially good today.”

He’s walking down the hall to Mr. Kim’s office as he reminds you of the treats. It’s such a wonderful morning now that Anders has acknowledged your hard work too. You must really be doing a good job. Without wasting any time, you walk a little too fast to the meeting room to display the glasses. Before you can though, a call for your name stops you in your tracks.

“In a hurry?” The deep, mocking tone of a certain someone you were trying to avoid is all you can hear.

Taking a few steps back until you are facing the doorway where you heard his voice from, you come face to face with an image only your imagination tried to conjure on nights you were so, so tired. The real thing though, was far more picturesque. The eldest Kim, Seokjin, stood there, lean muscle on display while his jeans hung low. Hair wet and skin looking slightly flushed due to the shower you assume he just had, judging from the towel around his neck. Even if you tried, you wouldn’t be able to stop your eyes from memorising each ridge on his abdomen. There was something about seeing him in casual wear when you have only ever witnessed him in slacks and expensive silk shirts.

“Are you done? I get that I'm the most handsome man you’ve ever seen but the staring does get old.” He’s sighing as if he bears a great burden on his shoulders.

"I wasn't- wasn't star-"

"Anyway. Bring me a glass of scotch will you?" He cuts you off before you can actually properly say anything.

Now sitting on the plush couch with his legs spread and an arm slung behind the backrest. Looking like something out of a magazine cover. Ugh! He was so infuriating. He didn't even respect you enough to let you respond to his ludicrous remarks! Nevertheless, you were in no position to be angry. He was your boss after all. And after last week, you weren't about to stir up trouble and get yourself fired.

You must have been zoning out for a little too long because you can feel Seokjin's stare burning a hole through you. His gaze indifferent and apathetic. "Well?"

"Yes... Sir." Your mouth aches from the force with which you clenched your jaw before answering.

Standing a good distance away from him really helped your mental state. You were much more clam and composed. You had space to think. Unlike when you were in that room last week. His proximity made it worse for you to think let alone compose a coherent sentence to stop whatever the men were practically forcing you into. Who even makes a deal with a servant anyway? They could toss you out whenever they want to, that's for sure. So really, they were playing with you and you'd been nervous and scared and made that stupid call back home like the gullible sheep you were. That's what rich people with too much free time on their hands did. Play with innocent people's feelings. Not knowing how much trouble it may cause for them. So, whatever. You weren't going to think about it and let them get the best of you again.

Turning swiftly, you complete your original task of replacing the liquor glasses. Carefully pouring one for Seokjin - despite your dislike for the man - as to not pour too much or too little. He's in the same position when you left, albeit, his body more relaxed into the sofa than before as he flicks through the channels. The noises erupting in the room suddenly, however, make you halt in your tracks like you just witnessed some sort of tragedy. The high pitched moans and whimpers are bouncing off the walls all too clearly. The sounds are so pornographic it has your whole body on fire and your pulse racing. Taking a look at the TV - of course, it actually is porn. And what do you know, that's enough to rattle you once more as you almost see it happening in slow motion.

The glass that was weighty and secure on the tray in your hands; now tumbling to the tiled floor like it was fairy floss dissolving in your hands. The loud shatter compared to the very obtuse and unmoving reaction from Seokjin is too metaphorical for you to not notice. This incident now can pretty much sum up your encounters with him. Seokjin hasn't moved an inch, casually watching porn like it was the weather man. All the while you're glancing frantically at him and then the floor, then back at him and back to the floor where they shattered glass is scattered on the floor.

"I'm- I'm so sorry, sir! I'll clean this u-up." What even was happening. How the hell do you apologise with those noises in the background?!

"Don't interrupt. You've already broken expensive glass, don't sully my enjoyment of the film too." Again, he has yet to even look at you.

"This is hardly a film." The words escape you a little too quickly and a little too loud. And of course, Seokjin would notice now. If only because of your ticked tone and the scoff that’s bound to get you in trouble.

“Any movie that I’m in is worth watching.”

“Excuse me?” What was he talking about?

That’s when all plans of being poised and professional go out the window. Due to one rookie mistake. Taking the bait that he dangled in front of you because you turn around like a fool and look at the large TV screen. The sight is slightly unexpected. You had expected to see porn, of course. But not porn that included Seokjin. Sure enough, it’s hard to deny that it’s really him behind a really attractive blonde, someone you recognised from a lot of hollywood movies, flexing his biceps as he intently stared at the camera. You could feel your body tightening up, your thighs connecting with each other on instinct. You can feel the perspiration build up on your skin, your heart rate a million miles an hour. Seokjin was naked in all his glory, hair still looking as if it had just been styled in that effortless way. Even though the snapping of his hips behind the woman displayed how much his muscles were being exerted. The scene was mesmerising. His smouldering eyes holding yours captive that you forget that he was actually there in the flesh. Currently watching you look at the screen like a pervert.

Seokjin’s chuckle breaks your blatant staring at his naked form in the video that was playing by pausing it. So you had no other choice then to look back at his smirking face. The wheels turning in your head, trying to find a viable excuse to get out of another uncomfortable situation you seem to have pulled yourself into just because you can’t help your reactions. The anger was also starting to creep up your spine, getting dangerously close to the part of your brain that failed to control your impulsivity. All because Kim Seokjin was pushing you to your limits. So instead of making a comment on how you had shamelessly watched a good minute of his sextape with some A-List actress, you clear your throat and look him dead in the eye no matter how hard it was after seeing what you had.

“I will have Jihoon bring you another glass and clean this up right away.” Taking a small bow, you cheer internally that you didn’t stutter.

“I don’t want Jihoon. I want you.” Your breath hitches at the heat in his words. Somehow they didn’t convey the appropriate message considering the context.

“S-Sorry?” Seokjin clears his throat, looking back at the TV before speaking again.

“To clean up this mess.” He waves his hand at the shattered glass again, flicking the TV to some cartoon channel.

“O-Okay.”

“Aw, did I miss all the fun?” The cheery voice from the doorway finally takes Seokjin’s attention away from you to his younger brother.

“If by fun you mean the maid breaking house property then, no. I’m sure she’ll make more mayhem soon enough.”

“If you can kindly wait till i’m out of earshot to discuss me, that will be great!”

It’s like you’ve asked them for 2 million dollars or something because Jimin’s eyebrows have shot so far up his forward you’re worried that his eyes might fall out of their sockets. Seokjin is looking at you, really looking at you, for the first time it seems. Even you hadn’t expected to lose your cool because you’re slapping your hand over your mouth, knowing you have definitely screwed up now if you hadn’t already.

“Oh?” Jimin’s tone is mocking and amused. Showing how unexpected your outburst was.

“It seems that our little maid has a spine after all?” He walks to you like a predator ready to trap his prey and it sends a chill down your spine.

Jimin was attractive.

That much was obvious. Somehow his soft features didn’t translate to his personality, he didn’t seem human in the way he addressed you. His tone was almost vindictive. Like he couldn’t believe that someone of your stature would talk back to him. As much as it didn’t make sense, you looked back at Seokjin out of instinct. As if he could save you from whatever Jimin will inflict on you. Which was ridiculous given that moments ago you were ready to strangle him.

“I-I don’t appreciate being treated like a toy.” Chin up, feigning all the faux confidence you could conjure, you stand your ground.

Jimin’s cackle is like needles in your skin. It makes you hot and cold at the same time. Walking over to you, he’s merely a few inches away. Clearly trying to intimidate you as he’s done before. The scent of his cologne hits your nostrils and you have to clench your fists to stop yourself from taking a deep inhale. Perfumes were your weakness. Seeing him up close again is enough to remind you of the last time. But you were more prepared now. No way you were going to let him kiss you again.

He brings up a jewelled hand, twirling the stray strand of hair that was framing your face. “Oh darling…. But you are a toy.”

His smile is so big and endearing - had you not already recognised the evil twinkle in his eyes. How dare he?! Your hands balling into fists, nostrils flaring from the sheer anger that you felt right now. This was one of those moments you would surely regret later on. Because you were about to slap the living daylights out of him.

“Let her do her actual job Jimin-ah. I believe we have things to discuss.”

Seokjin’s command is Jimin’s - and perhaps yours too - saving grace. He’s turning on his heels swiftly walking to where his brother lounged. You have to take a deep breath, snapping yourself out of it before you say something that might get you fired for real.

“Oh, y/n, bring me a glass of champagne too while you’re at it.” Jimin winks at you and you scurry out of the room without even responding.

This family was crazy.

_____________________

Champagne? Seokjin wondered what his brother had done in just a week to warrant a celebration.

“Is this another premature celebration Jimin? You know it ruins all the fun when you end up failing. For you that is. It’s very entertaining for me.”

Jimin is flipping him the finger as he sits down, changing the channels until it lands on something he is vaguely paying attention to.

“That was very rude you little shit. I was watching that.”

“Hyung, they were playing rugrats. You’re 27 now. Watch Naruto or something.”

“Tell me why you’re here before I kick your ass.”

“Wow, being around servants has turned you into a commoner too, huh?” Jimin is clicking his tongue like he's gravely disappointed. Obviously referring to you.

The mention isn’t healthy for Seokjin right now. He’s spent far too much time thinking of last week and the phone call he’d witnessed. Though the majority of that regret was not actually kissing you when he had the chance. Your lips had haunted his dreams too many times. This was an odd activity for his brain and he was now worried if you carried some sort of disease that caused all his brain waves to malfunction and make him think solely about you.

Jimin throws up his hands in defence when Seokjin remains unamused, moving a little closer to talk in a much more hushed tone.

“Okay okay. Hold off on the dick measuring. I’m here to tell you when we’re going to put the ‘plan’ into motion.”

Jin arches a brow in question. So soon?

“The family dinner is tomorrow. Most of the staff will be gone so less witnesses.”

“Is… the girl working the night? I don’t think essential staff includes the cleaners.”

Jimin smiles wide like he always does when he’s up to something. Though to be fair, he is always up to something.

“She isn’t but leave that to me.”

“Wasn’t gonna help.” Seokjin shrugs, feeling slightly ticked at his brother’s suggestion.

What was he up to now and why did Jin feel the need to protect you from Jimin’s devious plans?