#i definitely didnt understand gender stuff that well then but its still cute i wanted to be supportive anyway

[lazunight]

Discovered ive been following someone on here for at least 10 years wtf

[astrochemstry]

Jared Kleinman HC: having a crush on him, you don't wanna admit it but everyone knows

I was lying in bed and then i got this idea and it sounded really cute so i made it a reality asjdfbasjh im having a brainrot

Reader is gender neutral and its romance

OK SO JUST IMAGINE

YOU LIKE THIS GUY

YOU DON'T WANNA ADMIT IT BCS HES COCKY AS HELL

BUT EVERYONE KNOWS

E VE RYO NE KNO W S

YES EVEN HIM

OK lets go to the start so

SO I HAVENT FINISHED THE BOOK AND STUFF BUT

I DO THINK JARED WENT TO SCOUT CAMP AS A KID TOO

SO you met there

And as in met

He accidentally uh

Well yk those log things you gotta walk on??

He slipped and accidentally bumped into you

And you fell on the mud lmao

Bro was trying vv hard not to laugh actually

“Kleinman, apologize to (Name).”

“Sorry.”

hE AINT GOOD AT THIS FORGIVE HIM PLS

Ok so like youre still mad but

Throughout your time there he makes it up with

aCTS OF SERVice

sO some hcs here are from @/bemorecronch pls check them out vv good at writing jared and hilarious as hell

So one of their hcs is that if he likes u he randomly gives u food

oH diD I NOT MENTioN??

THIS GUY LIKES YOU TOO

So like one time you dropped your snack and like vv frustrated bcs you fell in mud and now your snack fell in mud

So he goes up to you and shoves his spare sandwich onto you

Youre like ???? but then he jsut raises and eyebrow

“Don’t you know how to eat or did that dirt change everything in you??”

You choose whether you smacked him or not

But like after that and everything, he sat with you and just ate with ya

Then the crushing started

SO YEARS PASS

WELCOME TO HIGHSCHOOL OR WHATEVER TOOK PLACE IN DEH

yOU MEET AGAIN

“Arent you that mud person from camp??” “Arent you that asshole who shoved me??”

Sassy conversations

Murphy siblings live for it tbh

They love you

And then heres the thiNG

SO ONE TIME AT THE CAFETERIA

You guys just sat together and ate bcs i mean thats what you did at camp too

You guys we’re vv close and be reminded you have a crush on him

So liKE your body started to heat up and ik for some skin colors it wont be visible youre blushiNG BUT SINCE YOURE SO CLOSE HE CAN FEEL THE HEAT

Hes concerned bro “are you okay??”

“Yes im fine- just-” tHEN HE PLACES HIS HAND ON YOUR FOREHEAD

TO CHECK YK

Totally not an excuse to touch you

coIUGHGHcouG HH

So like you just froze?? Bcs oH SHIT ohIUSHAHH????

Alana was there and you were like oh thank god

But alana

aLANA KNOWS

ALANA SEES IT

But dw she doesnt like say it out and tease you

Takes you away and stuff “Oh god! (Name) are you okay? Lets go to the nurse.”

She doesnt take you to the nurse lmao

“So, you like someone?”

React how you want she aint gonna fall for you denying it

anYWAYS SHE DOES KEEP IT A SECRET

But like its you who, well, makes it less of a secret lmao

Like youre very expressive abt it

Everyone knows

The school knows

And you guessed it!

JARED KNOWS

Bro is happy as hell you like him back but don't forget hes a little shit

Teases you tbh

Like if youre sitting down and reading or smth hes just like “oh whats that??” and gets vERY CLOSE

From acts of service to physical toUCH

If you like passed a test or something he just awkwardly goes up to you and pats your back

“Good job” “uh thanks”

Hes silently crying inside bcs of that

Ok but like one day lets say Alana encourages you to confess

So you do and like when you see Jared youre just

Oh shit oh fuck oh no nope nO

But like he sees you and he just goes to you like “whats up??”

Its just casual

Too casual

So you didnt wanna confess in like a crowded hall lol so you tell him to meet you at some place like uh idk you choose

So Jared

Aint dumb ok

An asshole but this shit is fucking smart

And first thing he thinks is ‘theyre gonna confess. Definitely.’

No doubts bcs he knows u like him lmao

So you meet

And bro got a huge smirk on his face

“Soo- what did you want to talk about?”

Hes just so calm?? And casual? That youre freaked out and suspicious bcs you expect him to spit out some mean things and stuff

“Uh- this is- wait uh” “go on.” “weLL- uH”

Then he laughs

You guys know what im talking about

“You sound like Evan” hes wHEEZing

“LOOK i LIKE you okay???”

“Everyone does” “No i mean- the- the like like”

Bro acts like he doesnt understand

So uh yeaH you kiss hiM

Look he knows u like him but hes still shocked bcs daMN

In the end, he just goes “oh i know you do. Everyone does.” with a smiLE

Smack him smACK hiM

[oriigirii]

The Brothers reacting to an MC who likes to collect... rocks?

It was certainly a strange hobby to behold, but there were more than meets the eye within these rocks! If you crack them open they often hold such a wonderful design, and on the rare occasion they can probably even hide a geode or two, regardless, you were very passionate for these things and it just so happens that it catches some of the brother’s attention.

(A/N: Ill be doing 2 at the time for now UwU  

Warnings: none! 

Reader: Gender Neutral!)

~ 눈_눈 Lucifer ~

* Lucifer always kept an eye on you ever since you got to Devildom

* Cuz of this, he was probably the first to notice your... strange addiction

* He saw how you always seem to stop on your tracks to pick up a shiny smooth stone lying on the side of the gates infront of the HoL while he walked home with you.

* Or how you’d snatch a few from the gardens on an early Sunday morning when you think that everyone was still asleep

* Since it was harmless enough, he never really bothered to call you out on it 

* Lowkey does find it cute how something so small can already make you so happy, such an easy-to-please cutie you are

* It wasn’t a problem till he was told that you seem to be arriving late more often for your classes 

* At first he thought that maybe you were simply caught up in some mess from his brothers again 

* Maybe perhaps Belphie snuck you off to sleep again than go to class 

* But no, when he’d confronted you he was pretty surprised, and at the same time, confused at your answer.

* “There were these cool looking red geodes I accidentally found on the back, b-but I mustve dropped them at some point when Mammon and I were rushing to class...so I’ve been trying to look for more of them for my collection... Sorry...”

*To be fair you did look pretty apologetic for it and really didnt mean to botch up your schedule, but still.

* He lets you go pretty easily, with a small lecture, but thats about it. 

* Although you never did stop looking for that geode, you even pulled Beel to help with promise of a homemade cake to try and cover as much ground, but nothing.

* You came home that day a little defeated

* but much to your surprise when you reached your room, a small box was waiting outside your door and inside was none other than the beautiful red geode youve been so desperate to look for. And... well, you didnt have to guess who was kind enough to give it to you.

* The next day, you do go over to thank him properly for the help, and explain that you had been extremely captivated with that specfic geode because of how it reminds you of the first born’s eyes.

* This boi is highkey stunned but tryna make it lowkey though (pride 100)

 * Definitely amused and flattered. 

* From now on, he does continue to give you geodes to add to your collection, and would even accompany you on your little endeavors if his work load isnt too unbearing. Away from the eyes of his brothers of course.

* Hed definitely want to seek the perfect geode too that reminds him of you in return that he can decorate on his desk while hes working. Even better, maybe have the geodes crafted to a perfect ring that you two can wear.

-------------

~ ᕙ(`▽´)ᕗ Mammon ~

* Not like youre complaining either

* Today was another weekend, and weekends mean you guys get to hang out!  

* Not like you two were ever seperated in the first place anyways, he’s like an octopus that just wont let go 

* Anyways, He casually enters your room, phone in hand as he scrolls through various articles featuring his modelling work, he was gonna show off as usual, afterall, this man LIVES for your praise.

* “Oi! (Y/N) Check this out! They ranked me number 1 on the most handsome model in Devildom! And I didn’t cheat the system this ti---”

* You had been busy in your cabinet when he walked in, so you didnt have time to warn him of your mess on your bed.

* Hence why, when he was starting to brag about his latest achievement, it was immediately cut off by a pained yelp.

* Mammon, too busy on his DDD, didnt notice the shiny geodes and stones you had left on your bed to arrange for your new dsplay case, and because of this, (his dumbass) plopped on the bed, landing right on the sharp edges of the beautiful rocks.

* It wasnt fun.

* You had rushed to help him as he started stroking his back from the sting, he was a demon so he was pretty sturdy, but cmon, landing on a buncha hard rocks was still not good.

* You did rush to go get him an ice pack for his poor back, and when you came back, he seemed to have been healed almost immediately as he stares at your collection with a big shine on his own eyes, they can rival the geodes at this point.

* “(Y/N)! Why didn’t you tell me you had these? Don’t yknow how much these would sell? Hell, I can even probably sell them for an even higher price!”

* The rolling of your eyes was very intense that Diavolo could feel it from his castle and you pushed that ice pack on his face to make him stop.

* You did make it very clear that if he ever decides to try and get any of these stones, you were gonna be snitching him to Beel for eating his pudding the other day (You wouldn’t though would you?)

* Still that does shut down his money making plans, but he does question you for it, why hoard these valuable items when you could make thousands of grimm for it? You even seem to have a talent for finding these too, it seems like a huge waste, and so you proceed to explain to him your love for these shiny geodes.

* First image in his head was you being a relative to a crow, or you being a crow in general, because if anything, thats what his little crows do, they pass him shiny stuff they find along the day, of course theyre not as extravagant as these geodes, but it doesnt negate the fact you definitely have crow energy, and hes so down for it. His love for you just grew tenfold.

* But who knew it can grow further? Because you eventually explain to him that the geodes you collected, or the simple stones you had, all were special because all of them hold a special memory. One of the smoother stones you had was the same stone you used to display your mom’s favorite rose garden, it even had your initials that you scrapped on when your were 5, another was a geode you found on your field trip at the human world and so on.

* Mammon definitely had his attention to you the entire time, this boy is smitten and he just loves hearing you talk about each one, he grows a small appreciation for them now and he can understand why you wouldn’t want to sell them away. But then he noticed you reach for a much cleaner, tear drop looking geode, it was a blue-yellow mix.

* You explain to him that this was your first geode found when you went here in Devildom, the first you also carved as it was more jagged than this when you found it, and of course, you chose to keep it cause it reminded you for your first man.

* Mammon was so moved,and he was just sitting there, red as a strawberry and mouth open like a fish out of water, but hes not the only one because you too were blushing like an idiot as you held the special rock.

* He does end up trying to act his typical ways, but he was nothing but a stuttering mess, and much to his embarassment, he was also tearing up.

* Please hug him, he needs it, he just cant help but feel so flattered that you dedicated a geode for him and he felt that pride and love swell to incredible levels, you definitely have him yearning for you even more.

* Next time you go out to seek more geodes here in Devildom, he might just come with you along with his army of crows, and even cuter, his crows would just hand you special rocks every now and then.

* This boy might just start his own collection now thanks to you, but most his geodes will just be dedicated to you

----------

A h h h hope you guys like it! I know its a weird premise, but I honestly do love gemstones and stuff lol, also yes i did indulge too much on Mammon, hush,but yeah, ill do more of the others soon!

(Art by me!)

[mieczyhale]

throwing together some of my recent/ish hc posts/tags for @hellomyguru bc its a thing, babey (i have no idea what you’ve seen and what you havent bc tumblr really just suck like that so lmao)

my tags on this post::  #HELL YEAH HELL YEAH #more pride hcs!!! noice!!#i love these sfm#like klaus always taking part no matter how bad shit is bc HIS PEOPLE!!! and ben trying to punch picketers and homophobes is fucking adorbs#and i would kill (whoop) for the day klaus makes ben corporeal during pride and ben can punch all the people and then disappear#vanya’s is cute. come to the light darling!!#and diego fksgjf okay listen whether one hcs him as bi or not this is 1000% something he’d do either way#he’s supportive!!! and he has lgbtqa+ family!!! and nobody gets to be mean to his family but him!!#see also:: the first year after the apocalypse is avoided five decides to tag along when klaus saying he’s taking dave to#his very first pride. he not only enjoys himself but he learns a lot and either then or over the course of the following weeks figures his#own labels out - bc i hc five as asexual and i just have a thing for klaus being the all knowledgeable one about something for once#and his siblings learning about gender and sexuality from him and maybe discovering something new about themselves along the way!#except luther. he’s a cis hetero and we all know it#but maybe he learns to be a good ally. maybe#i mean probably not but whatever#allison is the only other person in the family who i’d even consider calling straight#bc there’s nothing wrong with being straight and i just.. dont have another label that i think fits her really well#so yeah ive got gender and sexuality hcs for them all flgkscndn happy pride month bitches

my tags on this post:: #’you’re telling me this happens every year?? for a whole month??!’ #actually i need every possible concept of dave experiencing pride month and seeing how far things have come for gays#like rainbow shit everywhere#and of course the legalization of gay marriage#out and proud gay politicians and gay people in positions of power#the amount of support that comes when homophobic shit happens now#homophobia isnt the accepted norm anymore#another thing i like is the concept of - either during pride or just in general - dave being excited to learn about the community as a whole#his boyfriend is a nonbinary pansexual and klaus has explained before what those words mean but dave wants to really understand#we stan a supportive and loving couple#dave has a lot to learn in 2019 but i think this stuff would be the most important and have the most effect on him yknow??#shit isnt perfect but its better and now he can work on getting passed the environment he was raised in#so he can hold klaus’s hand in public and kiss him around other people without panicking and eventually he proposes because HE FUCKING CAN#HE CAN DO THAT. HE CAN JUST.. ASK HIS BOYFRIEND TO MARRY HIM. LEGALLY.#good fucking shit

my tags on this post:: #did you see the state of the sky in the apocalypse?? there’s a chance he really wouldnt have noticed#i mean like yeah it could be a funny plothole#but there could also be reasons for why thats not something he noticed#or idfk man timeline shit#maybe the moon didnt explode the first time around#maybe it did and there’s just another moon somehow some way#maybe he didnt notice bc he was first too scared and then too frenzied and angry probably and then he had shit to focus on and math to do#and then dolores wanted to go on dates to the local wine cellars and flat empty areas that used to be parks and then there was spending days#in the library together like having a girlfriend is a lot of work okay#maybe five just didnt have the time to slowdown and consider things like space#maybe his headspace was too fucked#sometimes you just forget about the moon - i know i do!#so sfgksncjf okay y e ah

my tags on this post:: #YES!!! #yes yes yes #okay #so#everytime someone mentions or even hints at dave having anger issues i wanna fucking cheer bc thats one of my biggest hcs for him#like yeah he’s sweet and gentle and respectful and all that - genuinely a good man - our lil jewish gay#BUT#he did grow up in the 50s and 60s which as op said would have surrounded him with a lot of toxic masculinity. now i dont think he would be#a toxic kind of masculine AT ALL but it definitely would have forced him to hide his emotions and feelings and idk hobbies and of course his#sexuality. and i say hobbies bc there isnt a canon answer for it i dont think but i personally hc dave as being someone who loves art#specifically: drawing. dave keeping a lil sketchbook and some pencils under the pillow on his cot in vietnam?? yes please#so anyway yeah - he wouldnt have really had any good examples of how to properly take care of your anger - although he has enough#heart and common sense to know its really fucking wrong to take it out on women and children and people one is dating WHICH - another hc i#have that ties into this is that somehow his dad found out that he’s gay and beat the crap out of him over it. because unfortunately thats a#thing that happens. so his main male example was an abusive pos. and then he goes to vietnam which is fine because its not like he has#anyone stateside that will miss him - that will talk to him anymore - and its a warzone so there are a lot of ways to work out your anger#and yeah that of course includes bar fights. and he does - usually - try and keep a hold on his anger until he’s away from anyone who might#feel threatened - and he doesnt wanna end up taking out an innocent on accident - but he’s not actually perfect and so sometimes he fails#and it happens around klaus one time and seeing his love’s reaction - the making himself smaller - trying to hide - going quiet and so#clearly afraid - and not just afraid but afraid OF HIM - freezes him to the core where he stands because nobody has ever reacted like that#before. or if they have he never noticed or cared because they didnt matter. but this is klaus. his klaus. who he loves and would never do#anything to hurt him. his klaus who he protects and defends and knows he wants to spend his life with - no matter how impossible it is#he wants to go to klaus and apologize - try to undo the damage done simply by him raising his voice and lashing out - but he doesnt know#what to say or how to say it - he doesnt know what to do with the situation honestly. so he leaves the tent and goes to take his renewed#anger and frustration out on whatever he can find so he can calm down and hopefully get into the right headspace to have whats#no doubt going to be a really hard conversation with his boyfriend. because where do you even start??#but of course they talk it out and dave promises to work on his anger and on how he lets it out and yknow.. its dave so klaus trusts him and#it takes some time - there are some incidents - but dave works hard and learns a lot from klaus - including how to unlearn a lot of shit he#grew up with - and its rough but having a partner from the future who breaks all kinds of barriers definitely helps#so y eah. those are my brief feelings on it and i wanna marry op 

my tags on this post::   #!!!!!!!!!!!! #YES #i adore this post#i could never pinpoint why the introduction on the bus made me feel like That but this is it!!#its just so sweet and innocent - even surrounded by other soldiers in the middle of a warring country#the innocence and unbearable fucking adorableness of their first convo on that bus just… its so bright and lovely it makes everything else disappear#the only thing that matters is the two guys getting to experience that ‘o h’ moment for the first time in their lives bc their childhoods#never let them have that #i assume#bc like op said klaus didnt go to a regular school and he wasnt p much stuck in that house and then he was on the streets so#and for dave like.. i guess he could’ve had that moment in school? but it would’ve been one-sided and he never would have#told anyone. 1960s. gay jewish man. yeah.#they’re each others first (and only) loves and i just really fucking adore that and live off of posts about them 

my tags on this post:: #what if he wasnt dead-dead though???#bc like… the day five found them all dead was apparently the day the apocalypse happened right? so its not like they’d been dead for days#weeks or w.e yknow??#and the time between klaus dying and coming back is varying and undetermined - there’s no canon timing for the length of his deaths#so what if he came back to life??#like okay i know its not really possible in canon bc five buried them i think?? or is that a fanon thing??#i cant remembering #anyway#but still - in general klaus not being permanently dead in the apocalypse is another possibility#and five didnt know about it bc after finding them all he began his 45 year journey#and klaus wakes up alone and essentially has to learn to survive and he doesnt know five was ever there bc..well.. yeah#five is long gone#maybe klaus lives out his days in that wasteland#and he doesnt remember it where five does bc five time traveled back and klaus didnt. the klaus that got stuck in the#apocalypse is a different klaus - like a different timeline. the klaus from ep1 never got stuck in the destroyed future so#he’d have no knowledge or memories of it or anything#or - second thought - he kills himself at some point after waking up and either begs god to let him stay dead or he strikes some kind of#deal with her so he doesnt have to return to whats left of earth#oooo or something happened that put a lock on his powers?? like yknow those cuffs and devices and stuff in stuff in fantasy that freeze the#users abilities?? that’d be an interesting plotpoint bc then like who did it and why and what was the last day really like? yknow#vanya’s meds but More is the idea #just a thought#but anyway idk im just a big fan of klaus with the inability to die and all the possibilities that brings 

my tags on this post::   #i’ve actually never stopped to consider why he didnt notice them except for my v first tua watch-thru#which is odd bc like that seems like a thing one should notice after a few watches??#but w.e #anyway#my only other hc for that part of the episode isnt that klaus didnt notice them bc he’s used to guns#it’s that he didn’t hear them#or that they weren’t loud enough -to him- to register as gunfire initially#bc like one of my close hcs is that he has bad hearing. growing up with people screaming in your ears 24-7 365 can’t exactly be good for#his ears now can it? and with how loud some of them are and how close they can get to him - without touching him - that’s just.. a lot of#fucking volume okay#now add in the academy’s mission alert siren#how loud he listens to his music with headphones on when he’s trying to drown out some REALLY LOUD SCREAMING#and then being near gunfire growing up. those bank robbers had guns and weren’t exactly a big distance away#all the raves and clubs and parties he goes to?? places where music is played so loud the room shakes and you cant hear anything else and#the music itself can be heard from blocks away?? that’s an indeterminable amount of intense noise#and then of course the gunfire of vietnam#so like… boys ears have SUFFERED. whether they wanna acknowledge that in canon or not#so the shooting at the theater - the shooting thats IN the theater - which is large and meant to house sound#thats happening across a big city street from where they’re standing and they’re behind the food truck and if klaus was ordering when it all#started that was just another level of sound and he’s not exactly focused bc everything is awful yknow?? so either it takes him a second to#notice or register it on his own or maybe he doesnt and ben says something?? idk but that’s kinda the field i’ve landed on for that scene#not that im not here for op’s hc!!! bc it really is a good one and it makes sense. im just rambling my own theory here bc i like considering#the Ways for Things sometimes. esp with klaus involved. this does make me wonder tho… if his hearing somehow is -fine- in canon…. h o w?#bc like bitch who tf can take all that and have perfect hearing?? thats gotta be impossible. if they are fine is it related to his powers#somehow?? like.. does his casual passing between life and death all the time mean he doesnt have mortal ear weaknesses? its weird but im..#i’ve got theories. 

my tags on this post:: #probably in the massive fucking pockets of his fluffy coat#see also:: a dealer’s place #a boyfriend’s place#an ex-boyfriend who is also a dealer’s place#a girlfriend’s place #a partner’s place#all ex’s of course bc dave is the only valid romantic relationship#he made friends with the person who owns a nearby thrift store and they help him out#he has a locker at a public place like the ymca#he only has one outfit before returning to the mansion so he has nothing to carry - ever on the move#he thiefs off of people in rehab and crackhouses he stayed in that are dumb enough to leave their shit unattended#when he sees something he likes or he feels its time for an outfit change#he mostly sticks with his lace up pants as far as bottom pieces go bc its much harder to sneak away with skirts#and the kind of crazy pants he likes. there’s only room for one pair of pants for this pan disaster#after returning to the mansion he has access to the funky gay clothes he had managed to aquire before leaving all those years ago#bc like… i kinda hc that he got out of there fast and probably higher than fuck and had nothing packed#have you ever tried to pack while high?? it’s harder than it has any right to be#crack theory:: he had a bag - we just never saw it bc in the beginning he wore it under his floofy coat bc safety and he didnt need it the#rest of the time.#i have a lot of thoughts and headcanony opinions about klaus’s time on the streets so thank u#for giving me a place to dump some of them   

[harryisntstraight]

Sorry that was so long i just am feeling very confused about how i identify and i thought maybe you would have some advice or be able to help me out a little? You're always so sweet and kind and im feeling very lost atm. Sorry about only 2 of the asks going through tumblr didnt eat them my phone was just not letting me send them so i had to switch to my computer. You can just read all the asks and reply to just this one on your blog if thats ok? :)

aaww hey i’ll post the rest under a readmore so it doesnt clog ppl dash (soz if ur reading this on mobile jfhsdjh) also i posted the rest of ur ask just bc i feel like there might be ppl who resonate w the whole thing yanno

I've known I liked girls for a few years now and I've always labeled myself as bisexual and I have dated one guy and it was a pretty eh relationship. Didn't feel much so I broke it off. I recently have been really questioning my attraction to men. I feel sexually attracted to some men but not that many. I'll see the occasional guy I find attractive irl but that's pretty rare mostly I find some celebrity men hot but even that is very few when compared to the amount of women I find attractive I just feel like I find all women so beautiful and am attracted to them in this whole different way to men? Like it takes a lot for me to find a guy hot and when I do it's almost never to the degree that I feel for women. And when I think about men romantically it does nothing for me all the cute stuff you're supposed to want I don't? I can think about sex with certain men and find it very appealing and that's it. But when I think about dating a woman and doing really cute mushy stuff with her it feels so right and makes me feel like its all i want? And I can see myself having a wife and being with a woman forever but men just dont really appeal to me in that way i just cant see it? Thing is I've never actually dated a girl so i keep telling myself im kind of making it up in my head how much i want it or how it could be but idk. And i feel sexually attracted to some guys so i think oh but maybe there will be a guy you want all that with? and i just dont know anymore?

firstly hiiii i relate so much to so many things u said here and i feel like this such common experience for women that are into other women. i think for me personally, i’ve always kind of been quite into the idea of not labelling my sexuality specifically. i feel really comfortable with using labels like gay or lgbt or queer as umbrella terms when talking about myself, but referring to myself as bisexual or lesbian never really feels 100% right for me. like you said, i know that i’m attracted to women romantically and sexually so i definitely identify as being lgbt i just always find it difficult to point to one precise label thats more specific. i think in a way, a lot of what your describing is probably down to heteronormativity and a degree of internalised homophobia, like its something that we all have to battle with and deal with daily even on a subconscious level. when being same gender attracted is still seen as ‘abnormal’ i think its only natural to feel weird about that part of yourself and want to repress it slightly. i think being a woman as well we’re so defined by our supposed attraction to men that its hard to get over that and accept that it’s something you dont feel. even if you know if ur heart that loving women is a natural and beautiful thing, when ur constantly surrounded by a society thats so focused on heterosexuality it can be so difficult to accept that part of you no matter how much you want to. i cant tell you how you identify or what the right label is for you but i think just being open and not pressuring yourself into fitting one specific label can actually be really helpful and take a lot of the stress and anxiety away. i think once you stop frantically trying to put a name to what you feel, it gets easier to just....Feel(tm) what youre feeling and sort of go with the flow. not second guessing and analysing my attraction has honestly helped me a lot, if i feel something for someone i sort of just feel it. i try not to get caught up in putting a name on my sexuality, but instead just experience it as it happens. i think its a really natural thing to want to understand yourself and figure out who you are but honestly, you have so much time to do that that if you cant figure it out right now then its not that important. i think as long as you acknowledge your attraction to women and are open to exploring it then not knowing for sure whether or not you also like men isn’t a big deal. i definitely think that experience is helpful to understanding yourself better, once you have that experience it does help solidify things in your mind and i know for myself that once i started being with girls i became 100000% more sure that i wasnt ‘faking’ anything and that i was into them. that being said, it isnt mandatory and not having experience with the same sex doesnt by any means devalue your feelings or sexuality. long story short just give it time, dont stress yourself out too much with forcing a label that you’re unsure about. things will get clearer for eventually and maybe someday you’ll find a label that fits you. and maybe you wont and honestly thats okay too. sexuality is complex as hell and understanding yourself is genuinely a journey, it’s totally okay if you’re only just getting started. hope this helped a bit, love you 💖