#i do absolutely fuck with a really good grilled cheese

[vasyandii]

Hello! I just wanted to say that I absolutely adore your IHNMAIMS oc. I'm a OC x canon enthusiast and seeing a character so well written and adapted to the story as Vernon is makes me so excited!! Plus your art is literally amazing. I've been curious since you mentioned how Vernon cuts potions of her meal to give them to AM and how the food improved since AM got his body, what food/meals do Vernon and AM like/dislike/have as favourite? -for AM, at least from what he has tasted- Whether if it's because of the taste, flavour, etc.

Howdy Anon! Thank you so much for the kind words, I've been giddy since I got it a few days ago! I'm glad my OC x Canon content gets your stamp of Approval >:D!! 💞💞

VernonAM 🏺🖥️ Food Preferences

I think Vernon is careful in choosing the food she shares with AM because he will eat literally ANYTHING. She would try to eat things to torture herself with, extremely spicy foods, live insects, raw organs, etc. but then remember that she has to "Feed AM". So she opts out for something normal so his taste buds don't get fucked.

Or as normal as it can get, the food kind of has the uncanny valley effect as well. It looks normal and tastes normal, but she feels there's something a bit off about it (kind of like airplane food). So she often leaves criticism to the Chef™ (AM) or asks to cook instead.

Vernon isn't particularly picky when it comes to food, she'll eat it and clean her plate. She likes her food balanced, vegetables/meat with sauce and all that. If it tastes good, she'll eat it, y'know?

AM is more... difficult. Sure, he'll eat anything, but if it tastes really bad, it'll traumatize him and he'll refuse to eat it for a while.

His food has to not be touching, if it's mixed in all together beforehand he'll eat it. If there's sauce it shouldn't be close enough to where it can contaminate the food AM's eating because he WILL taste it, no matter how small the amount is. His utensils need to be a specific size, and the food HAS to be hot/warm. He needs to be able to see or know every ingredient in it.

It's observed that AM likes fried foods/anything crunchy because of how consistent they are in taste, texture, and flavour. So what ends up happening is Vernon will just include those foods into her meal, just to not eat it and have it on a little plate for him.

Vernon asks him why he can't just make food for himself, his response is "I don't need to eat, I eat when when you eat."

But honestly it's a pretty dumb question now that she's looking back on it. AM has all the knowledge in the world about food, everything ever made, everything he's never tasted. So he's basically asking Her, indirectly, "I don't know where to start or what's good. But you do. I trust you. Feed me."

Now here's some of the meals They've had together (+ AM's comments):

Chicken soup ("Too wet", just ate the broth)

Caesar Salad ("Damp, Crunchy water")

Vanilla ice cream (experienced a brain freeze for the first time, thought his body was malfunctioning)

Spaghetti Bolognese ("No I will not be mixing it, you mix it for me")

Western beef stew (He picked out the potatoes and only ate those. Thought the meat was irritating to eat.)

Baby carrots. ("You know they bleach these, right?")

Asparagus (he likes them. Needs to be warm)

Broccoli (same thing)

Cheese Pizza (Ate it, ate too much. Tummy hurted.)

Tempura (Ate too much, tummy hurted)

Fish and chips (Ate too much, tummy hurted)

Coffee, black (spat it out)

Macaroni and cheese (Ate too much, tummy hurted)

Grilled chicken hearts skewers (He liked it, but kept poking the roof of his mouth with the skewer.)

Half a Hamburger (picked out the vegetables because he didn't like them, still tasted it and gave the rest to Vernon)

Half a cheeseburger (ate it with no fuss.)

Aaand that'll be all for now :) if you made it this far, thank you for reading! If you need any clarifications, feel free to tell me!

[bittsandpieces]

dick size doesn’t matter like u said

u know what does matter tho

their ability to make a really good grilled cheese

CORRECT

[kennahjune]

ALRIGHT BUT

I’ve been having flustered Steve thoughts.

The Party has NEVER seen Steve flustered. Steve’s always the one flirting and no one ever flirts back anymore so Steve’s never actually flustered.

But then Eddie Munson comes slithering along and he flirts with everyone just cause he can but nobody’s flustered by his attempts because he’s not trying to actually fluster them.

But for some reason he really flusters Steve.

Eddie uses this to his advantage and actually puts forth effort when he flirts with Steve.

Steve is flustered, bashful, embarrassed. He’s twirling his hair and giggling and he does this thing where he taps his fingernails on his front teeth when he gets distracted.

The Party was NEVER seen Steve like this.

Not even Nancy when they were dating.

Steve has described what he was like when he was flustered to them, calling himself stupid and saying he acted like an idiot to try and get them to just lay off.

All anyone sees is an absolute sweetheart.

Steve blushes really bright, starting with his ears and it just travels down from there. And also he’s really bad at hiding his smiles and he smiles so BIG when Eddie flirts with him. Like you can see every tooth and his eyes crinkle so much they basically close and his nose scrunches up.

And Eddie fucking THRIVES in it.

Because NO ONE else gets Steve like that.

Eddie’s witnessed Steve flirting with the girls of Hawkins. Has seen them all flirt back with varying degrees of bluntness.

None of them have gotten Steve nearly half as flustered as Eddie has.

UNTIL.

Eddie has Steve come over to the trailer to hang out. Steve by some turn of events ends up cooking and making grilled cheese and tomato soup.

Wayne comes home right as Steve is playing everything and Steve is DISTRAUGHT. Like “no Wayne it’s alright, really. I can make you some to it’s ok I like cooking you’re really doing me a favor.”

So Steve makes Wayne a grilled cheese to and refuses to let Eddie eat until they can eat together.

So they’re all sitting and then they start eating. And obviously it was a damn good grilled cheese— Eddie knew Steve could cook but good GOD.

And then Wayne puts his grilled cheese down, looks between Steve and Eddie, and tells Eddie “If you don’t marry ‘im I’m adoptin ‘im.”

And Steve BEAMS.

It’s that same smile he gets when Eddie flirts with him and Eddie is only somewhat livid.

Cause he totally gets the rush of having Wayne compliment you for the first time. He’s just such an honest man.

And it goes from there that the only people who can fluster Steve are Eddie and Wayne (Eddie romantically and Wayne platonic-fatherly).

They both go out of their way to compliment him constantly just to see him smile like that :)))

Aaahhhhh this makes me so happy!!!!

[lonelypep]

every smash bros character ranked by how good of a cook i think they’d be.

82: piranha plant

eating this dish will kill you instantly. turns out he spit some poison in there while no one was looking. and yeah, that sucks, but if you even accepted a meal from this guy i think you have bigger problems

81: ridley.

let’s be real, if you let this guy into the kitchen, you made a huge mistake. it’s like john mulaney’s horse in a hospital sketch: you never know what he’s gonna do next. you’re too focused on getting him out.

80: king k rool.

king k rool is many things. a king, a pirate, a scientist. but he is not a cook. he’ll try, but he has literally no clue what he’s even doing in the kitchen.

79: yoshi

yoshi will give you a dish and you’ll be like “what the fuck is this” and he’ll talk about how it was made from the finest newborns of his home planet. i’m deciding to ignore it but it’s really nagging at me.

78: sonic

sonic shouldn’t be on this list. because he wouldn’t make you any food. he’ll go to the local sonic and get a burger in about 3 minutes. it sucks. disqualified.

77: pac man

what can i say. it tastes like literal plastic. i don’t even wanna know how he made it. i’ll give it back to him but the nice thing about pac man is he wouldn’t give a shit.

76: bowser jr.

fuck this guy. he rage quit at making a grilled cheese. now there’s a literal canonball in the stove. now no one else can use it!! this is what happens when you spoil kids.

75: pikachu/pichu

these two are in the same category since they’d make the same thing. they’d get store bought french fries and fry them with lighting outside. it’s consistent, it works, just not really filling. and they don’t know how to make anything else.

74. wario

don’t get me wrong: he knows what he’s doing. he’s the burger king of smash. he’s this low because the burger is the most unhealthy shit you’ll ever have. eating it gave you chronic diarrhea, gastrointestinal issues, and permanently damaged your taste buds. but god fucking damn was it a good burger.

73. hero

he gave you a single piece of bread with butter on it. it’s not bad but…really dude?

72: olimar

he didn’t make you a bad meal, in fact it was one of the best here. but that’s because he didn’t make you something. it was the pikmin and he’s trying to pass it off as his own and the pikmin don’t know because they don’t speak english. 0/10: not fucking cool dude.

71: kazuya

honestly? i don’t trust this guy. i was too intimidated to even ask his name. from what i can gather no one even invited him to the party he just showed up and made a mediocre meal. what’s weird: someone came into the kitchen and claimed this guy killed their whole family. we never saw that guy again. needless to say, kazuya wasn’t invited to the afterparty.

70: link (botw)

don’t get me wrong here, link is a five star chef. he’s just really unsanitary. apparently he cut the meat and vegetables with the same sword he killed calamity ganon with. i don’t wanna taste that guy!! have you seen him?? not to mention he pulled the meal out of his pants. i don’t even know how it fit in there.

69: inkling

she made a pancake and i thought it was good! but i absolutely can’t condone this. inkling left so much fucking weird slime and shit all over my house. and got really competitive when she heard i was getting meals from everyone else. i hope they’re all ok.

68: ROB

it was so processed. the most processed food i’ve ever had in my entire life. it’s not his fault, rob is a great guy. but this tasted like literally nothing.

67: ice climbers

when they told me they were making dessert, i trusted them. but i let someone else taste test first. my best friend was sent to the hospital because of tongue frostbite. didn’t even know that was a thing. i made the ice climbers pay for it (they’re fucking loaded)

66: villager

he made isabelle do it. and she made something great! but i’m not giving this cretin credit for having the money to afford a five star chef. you don’t deserve it because you sold a shit ton of tarantulas villager!!

65: lucario.

dude got really mad and destroyed my kitchen. he’s REALLY lucky he got the burger PERFECTLY cooked.

64: male byleth.

like this dude knows how to cook. he can barely make chicken nuggets. he has to eat in the school cafeteria simply because he never learned how to cook a simple meal. but he’s a really nice guy. total himbo. love him.

63: ryu

i asked this guy what he likes to eat. big mistake. he then went on to say that his training regiment doesn’t condone copious indulgence (his words) and he lives off of nothing but protein shakes. you do you i guess.

62-61: fox/falco

these two went into the kitchen and came out with weird alien food. i didn’t eat it but everyone else seemed to enjoy it

60: greninja

when he first came out i was so excited. he came out with the most finely sliced food i had ever seen in my entire life. but it was soooo watered down. everything tasted like celery. how do you make crab taste like celery?? how??!

59-58: simon/richter

these guys both made the same exact fish recipe, came out at the same time, and proceeded to fight each other. i didn’t get to try any 😭

57-49: every fire emblem character.

genuinely, i can’t tell these guys apart. or their food choices. honestly, my bad. i’m sure they’re good. but where do i even start.

48: sheik

she doesn’t know how to cook. she kidnapped someone else. normally i wouldn’t put someone like that this high but a. i have gender envy b. it’s for the greater good (or so she said)

47: cloud

dude made a great sandwich but he kept screaming random noises while he did. personally, i’m just glad he managed not to destroy the kitchen. that’s a first here.

46: captain falcon

he promised he’d pick up some pizza but got into a car crash on the way there. eventually he got there after the car crash was all sorted out, but got into ANOTHER on the way back. i’m honestly kind of impressed

45: steve

steve could cook an absolutely fucking KILLER meal. he’ll even offer to do it for free. but you shouldn’t let him under any circumstances. he took 13 hours gathering materials and while the wait was, arguably, worth it, i never want to experience it again. (side note: we asked captain falcon to get some pizza while waiting which led to the aforementioned entry)

44: sora

sora doesn’t know how to cook but he’s by far the biggest name at this party. everyone fucking loves him. he’s friends with GOOFY. this dude hangs out with GOOFY. this guys has hung out with GOOFY AND jack sparrow. bad food but i could listen to this guy talk for hours about his story. i’m sure i’ll understand it all.

43-40: pokémon trainer

this guys organization is fucking atrocious. if he can actually get his shit together he’ll cook up some nice vegetarian meals, but that’s a big if.

HONORABLE MENTION: sans mii gunner

sans undertale is a world renowned, famous chef. his recipes are simple, but cooked with such love, care, and finess it turns a simple cheeseburger into a masterpiece. sans undertale would easily top this list. sans mii gunner is not sans undertale. he bought the real sans’ cookbook and thinks he’s some kind of cooking genius. and sure he’s got the recipes but none of the skill to actually make it.

39-38: samus/zero suit samus

hooray! we’re out of bad cook options now. samus is a great cook, but she’s so used to her alien delicacies she doesn’t know how to cook on earth anymore. shame, but i trust her to produce something edible.

37: shulk

he is really good at the grill. unfortunately, he refused to put a shirt on and made everyone a little uncomfy. that being said, he showed me the beach boys and i had never listened to them before. so he gets points.

36-35: pit/dark pit

these guys don’t know how to cook but the flew into the sky and killed some mythical bird for everyone to eat. i couldn’t have any, i’m pescatarian, but everyone else loved it.

34: bayonnetta

she opened a portal to a waffle house and a bunch of demons came flying out. she didn’t make anything, but honestly, absolutely legendary experience that was.

33: duck hunt

you’d think a dog wouldn’t bring anything meaningful. this would be false. that is the freshest duck i’ve ever seen in my entire life. (didn’t eat it: pescatarian)

32: king dedede

he made his legendary homemade mashed potatoes. everyone loved them. so creamy… weirdly perfect. too bad i hate the monarchy. sorry bud.

31: meta knight

meta knight is a great cook and should be higher. but i don’t want him to be. because he’s so fucking pretentious. he sliced all the food in front of everyone and wouldn’t shut up about radiohead. hate this guy.

30-29: daisy/peach

these two put all their private chefs together to make something for everyone. great catering, great food, but they didn’t technically make it. love them.

28: mewtwo

as if mewtwo wouldn’t just read someone’s mind and cook something. but it’s not mewtwo’s food…so…. sorry dude you cheated.

27: dark samus

she really surprised me here. she cooked up the most exquisite alien delicacies i’ve ever tasted in my entire life. should be higher. but unfortunately, i had to get a space parasite removed from my system by regular samus. honestly though… it was worth it.

26: ganon

he was rude to everyone about his cooking skills and wouldn’t stop bragging. asshole am i right? but surprised everyone by grilling his god damn heart out. he’s a bad try hard but like go off i guess.

25: isabelle

she’s trying her absolute fucking best and she deserves the world here. amazing cook, we need to save her from the island.

24: little mac

dude went so hard. brought new york pizza ALL THE WAY FROM NEW YORK. ok, not literally, but he made a damn good pizza

23: snake

full disclosure: snake doesn’t know how to cook. also no one knows he’s an agent. but he has to cook to blend in so you BEST BELIEVE this man is going to COOK like his life depends on it.

22-20: young link, ness, and lucas

all these guys are incredibly mature for their age. surprised everyone at this party. i had deep and philosophical conversations with all of them about appreciating life. i fucking cried. oh and they made everyone sandwiches, and even took my pescatarianism into account.

19: rosalina

she brought weird space ice cream and i felt my mind expanding as i ate it. love her.

18: mr game and watch

he feels like everyone’s dad! and he’s one of those cooks who cooks in front of everyone. dude flung his meals onto everyone’s plates expertly. love him.

17: joker

originally much lower on this list, joker showed up at my house and attempted to make a grilled cheese and made the worst thing i’ve ever taste. then he said something about gru from despicable me and stood in the corner for an hour. originally i had him towards the bottom but then he doordashed five gigantic burgers, ate all of them in one sitting, and then made me an expensive curry that tasted fantastic. dude went hard.

it was at this point i realized i made a mistake with the numbers. like hell if i’m going to fix the whole thing.

22: zelda

she made some weird food but damn was it pretty to look at! crystals, magic power, i mean good vibes all around here.

21-20: pyra and mythra

i feel like i should put them here since they’re confirmed to be good cooks in the game. but between you and me, i didn’t invite them. i’d consider some entries before this to be better cooks but at this point i’ve been working on this list for 8 hours i do not wanna go back and fix things please i mean this whole list is a joke no one should take this seriously

19: banjo and kazooie

these guys can fucking cook. they’ve been living on their own for a while so it makes sense but it still surprises me. they made a really big stew and even brought free puzzle games.

18: wolf

GRILL MASTER. dude knows what he’s doing on that thing. i’ve never seen better spatula work. holy shit.

17: kirby

kirby came in with some weird blonde hair and made some FANTASTIC ribs (that i didn’t have bc i’m pescatarian). weirdly, gordon ramsey went missing the same day…. i’m sure it means nothing.

16: mario

dude made some absolutely spectacular spaghetti. but he kept talking about how great he is and it really off put some people. kinda weird dude.

15: dr mario. dude brought 50 apples to the potluck. guess he doesn’t wanna see anyone in the office. and he didn’t because we ate them all. take that.

14: min min

she brought some soup dumplings which a lot of people hadn’t had! love her. literally fantastic. she had a whole arm for cooking. that’s what we call efficient.

13: ken

he’s kenough. he is amazing at barbecue. he can cook things with his hands, juggle, also he’s just a fun presence. (i made him make fake meat burgers for me)

12: jigglypuff

she showed up with so many pastries. like so many. not only that, but they were decorative!! she put so much work into that. love her.

11: luigi

he tried to make spaghetti like his brother but a literal fucking meteor slammed into his pot and cracked it. tough luck. then he offered to pay and i refused, but went out and got me some really expensive spaghetti anyways! he’s such a nice guy!! shouldn’t be this high… but i love this guy so much. he’s trying his hardest and i respect that.

10: toon link

toon link didn’t actually make anything. but his mom came and made everyone a salad. and honestly! his mom is some great company. she had so many interesting stories about his childhood. honestly she added so much to the function

9: terry

he is the BARBECUE MASTER!!!! literally what the hell how is he so good! everyone at the party kinda stereotyped him but he’s really really progressive with his views which you wouldn’t think for a big barbecue muscle guy in a baseball cap but everyone loved this guy.

8: mega man

the MASTER CHEF!! literally. he was on master chef. he uses thin round blades to slice vegetables, heats things perfectly, has an instance knowledge of spices, just damn. this guy knows what he’s doing.

7-6: bowser and donkey kong

common misconception: everyone thinks these two would have no idea how to cook. but these are FAMILY GUYS HERE!! they’re providing for absolutely gigantic families, these fuckers know how to make a sandwich and they did. initially they started off making separate sandwiches but they have a really similar recipe and decided to work together. and i really respect that. also turns out peach is just bowser’s kids’ babysitter.

5: palutena.

everyone expected her to show up with some absolutely mystical food. naturally, she showed up with the literal ambrosia of the gods. holy shit. unfortunately, she didn’t put as much effort into it as she could’ve.

4: sephiroth.

ok this guy didn’t really cook anything amazing. but his sheer fucking commitment to the vibe is literally legendary. this man has a long as sword he cut 10 veggies at a time with. he heat them with magic world ending fire. when he was done in the kitchen he surrounded himself with fire and gazed menacingly at me. his sheer commitment to the edge lord aesthetic is truly exemplary.

3: incineroar.

THE GRILLING GOAT!! this man is a grill master. he was prepared to grill ANYTHING. and i mean anything. fish, veggies, meat, fucking grilled cheese. love this guy.

2: wii fit trainer

she made the most well balanced and healthy salad i’ve ever had. and she made it taste extraordinary. she can be a little intense about fitness but i’ve never had a healthier meal in my life. it immediately lowered my extremely high cholesterol.

1. diddy kong

he’s about ten. he made you a pb&j. he had homework to do, but he made you a pb&j. he didn’t have to. he wasn’t asked to. he just wanted to make you a pb&j. he could’ve done anything else but he made you a pb&j. what heartless monster wouldn’t accept it.

[copperbadge]

Hey Sam. If you're so inclined, could you recommend a few 'must eat' places in Downtown Chicago? My hotel will be near the Red Line (Grand station) and I'm fine walking a good 10 minutes for awesome food. I'm planning my trip and trying to put together a few food places for lunch and dinner and such. Pizza, burgers, bbq, donuts, steak, sushi..., I'm flexible!

You know, honestly, I don't eat out much anymore so I'm not sure where the best places to get a bite are. I'm going to make some recommendations but they're about to be a mixture of "If you come to Chicago this is somewhere everyone goes" and "This is somewhere Sam personally likes to eat but which you may not go for." :D

So, if you're at Grand, you are pretty much on top of the Weber Kettle Grill. Weber Kettle Grill does GREAT grill food and my parents always want to eat there when they come into town. If you ask to sit at the chef's table, you'll be seated at what looks like a bar, but it also looks all the way down the row of giant indoor grills the chefs use to cook the food. If you want something quieter and less busy they also have a fairly large dining room.

If you want a real Chicago experience, there's a Portillo's pretty close to you (that one's called "Portillo's & Barnelli's"); Portillo's is a local chain that does burgers, dogs, and crucially Italian Beef. Italian Beef is my go-to Chicago food for people who (like me) don't want to eat Deep Dish Pizza. It's a crusty roll filled with shredded braised beef; you can get it with sweet peppers, hot peppers, or no peppers (they might call it "giardinera" which is the local term for the pepper relish they use). If you get it "dipped", once the sandwich is made it's dunked in a flavorful jus before being wrapped up; if you don't like wet bread I'd skip this, but I love it. If you REALLY don't like wet bread, maybe get a Chicago Style hot dog instead. Portillo's is also famous for being The Place Where they make you a milkshake with an entire slice of chocolate cake in it. You can also just get a slice of cake, which is fantastic.

There's also an Al's Italian Beef near you if you want a more local experience. Locals absolutely can and will eat at Portillo's, the food's not better at Al's, it's just a bit more tourist-friendly than Al's tends to be.

If you want that true authentic Chicago deep dish experience (pie crust filled with cheese and then topped with sauce) Pizzeria Uno and Pizzeria Due are very close by; they vie for the dubious honor of having invented the deep dish pizza. I can't recommend it, but if you want it, hit one of those.

If you're not from the midwest and would like to sample a decent approximation of Detroit style deep dish (thick bready crust topped with cheese and then sauce) Jet's Pizza likely delivers to your hotel. I can't recommend going to a Jet's, many of them don't have anywhere to sit and eat, and for a pizza joint they're a bit costly, but it's very good pizza. My Detroit friends say it's a perfectly acceptable pie by their standards.

Volare Ristorante is a nearby hidden gem if you're in the mood for upscale Italian; I really like their pasta, but they are on the pricier end. If you're walking east on Grand to get there, you do have to go under Michigan, and you will likely fear that you will be stabbed and left for dead in this weird underground cavern, but I promise you, it's smelly but safe.

Goddess And The Baker and Beatrix are both good places to pick up breakfast. If you wish to glimpse Hell, the Starbucks Roastery at Michigan and Erie is one of the largest buxes in the country (possibly the world?) and is a FUCKING NIGHTMARE to navigate, but it's certainly an experience.

If you're venturing into the Loop, Russian Tea Time is a fun place to have afternoon tea and the a la carte food is also quite good; they're very close to the Art Institute. There's not much to eat if you're going to the museum campus, and my favorite Greek place closed down, but Minghin Cuisine is a good Chinese place (I've eaten there) and AO Hawaiian Hideout is supposedly some of the best Chinese in the city (I have not eaten there).

If you are craving Chinese, you can also catch the Red Line directly to the Chinatown stop and browse, I've never had a bad meal in Chinatown. When you get off the train, if you go north to the station exit with only stairs, you can exit, look left, and see the "new" Chinatown that's basically an outdoor mall; if you go south to the escalator exit, once you leave turn right and you'll see the big pagoda entrance to "old" Chinatown, which is more shops than restaurants. New Chinatown has some excellent bakeries, and also a Korean fried chicken place, Bonchon, that's extremely good. Usually when I take friends we go to Joy Yee which has a huge menu and also bubble tea.

As a final plug I'll list The Berghoff, which is in the loop (off the Jackson Red Line stop); it's pretty hefty German cuisine, all excellent food, and also is a top notch place to take anyone with gluten issues -- the owners have a kid with a gluten intolerance and the restaurant has an exceptional gluten-free menu with unusually strict protocols to prevent cross-contamination in the kitchen.

And if you want to get a little baked first, you are pretty close to Sunnyside dispensary, which is a very nice dispensary with super friendly people. If you take the Red Line to Roosevelt or are in the area, Grasshopper Club is less expensive, just as friendly, and Black-owned, and they've been my go-to for a couple of months now. At either one you can walk-in to speak to a budtender about what you'd like, or you can preorder online, but be aware that there are limitations on what out-of-staters can purchase. Having sampled most of the gummies out there, I'd recommend Mindy's (any flavor is good but the black cherry is my preferred). Do bring ID, you will be carded.

I hope you enjoy Chicago! If you have more questions feel free to hit me up here or at copperbadge@gmail.com if you'd like to have more of like, a dialogue :) Have fun and eat well!

[powderblueblood]

GETTING TO KNOW YOUR EDDIE

— the 411 on the loser playboy of the midwestern world

Tagged by @jo-harrington & @deathbecomesthem who got this stunning prompt on the road, love this love youse

let’s talk MUNSON!

What story is he from? What kind of story is it (Fix-it fic, Older!Eddie, Rockstar!Eddie etc)? The Eddie darling that takes up prime real estate in my brain is of course Hellfire & Ice Eddie, which is a teen romantic-dramadey with sprinkles of crime capers on top. We meet him at 18 years of age, drug dealin’, Dungeon wheelin’, at the absolute top of his bottom of the food chain game. He’s all raw nerve and engine sputter, our consummate not ready for prime time player. He is brassy, ballsy, funny, terrified.

What inspired you to write this Eddie? Flight of Icarus, actually! It reignited my initial love for him by basically confirming what I had already known to be true—he’s a little bitch that’ll take any opportunity to be struck down lovesick and he’s doomed by his bloodline.

What are your favorite headcanons about him/share something you never shared in your story? Eddie runs on a full tank of defiance, just burning rubber against what’s expected of kids his age—but to zoom in? Eddie sometimes wonders what it would be like if he was different. Tried harder. Cut his hair, joined the basketball team, really pulled himself up by his bootstraps and divorced himself from his stain of a last name. Folded in and blended, made all the right moves. Why couldn’t I do that? he thinks, Just pretend. I’m good at making shit up. But that’s selling out. And Eddie Munson is no sell out—rap sheet or no, his life is his own.

What does he wear on a casual day? On a dressier day? What does he wear to bed? Casual day, it’s your cartoon character stock costume of insert band t-shirt here, ripped jeans there, doubled up battle vest and leather cut to top it all off. There might be a variant in jean shade but that’s it. He likes to stick to a look. The dressiest he’ll go (he does not own dressy clothes) is a black cable knit sweater, very old, with the thumb holes worried through the cuffs. To bed, preferably nothing, but boxers of absolutely necessary and a very old, ratty pair of flannel PJ bottoms and an old t-shirt or a faded sweatshirt of Wayne’s if it’s freezing.

Favorite foods? This FUCK loves a pizza with the most fuckass toppings. Anchovy, black olive, pepperoni, sweetcorn (for the vitamins!), pineapple (for the jizz thing!) all on the one pie. But he can cook, to an extent, and we unfortunately have to hand this to ex-line cook Al who taught him how to grill a cheese and make a bitchin’ spaghetti with honeyed tomato gravy and lots of oregano. Eddie also loves a snack he can gesticulate with, see: Twizzler, corn dog, ice pop. Bordering on phallic foods.

Tell Us About His Family/Friends: Immediately in the gene pool—Al, the absent and up-to-no-good father who somehow still has a knife in Eddie’s side and will twist it with the simple words, “C’mon, that’s my boy!” Wayne, uncle and father figure, silent but loving and the only real pillar Eddie could ever lean against, and he feels like such a burden for it sometimes. Elizabeth, mommy dearest and dead, canonised like a saint in Eddie’s mind, and might have been but also might not have been. The root of his love of music and his need to tell stories to survive. The found-by-the-hand-of fate family— Ronnie Ecker, the Stalter to his Waldorf, the Bonham to his Page, the only person he’d ever follow into battle because you wouldn’t think it but Ronnie, who is secretly rage akimbo, would accidentally lead that charge. He loves her like a sister, she loves him like a dog. Just kidding. Maybe. He wants to be Ronnie Ecker when he grows up. Granny Ecker comes as part of this deal, one of the people credited with whooping Eddie into shape. We don’t quite know what shape yet, it’s Picassoan in nature. Then, the extension again that is the great Corroded Coffin/Hellfire crossover event—Jeff, Cyrus, Dougie and Gareth. He’s not quite as close with the boys, but they’re good boys. They love and fear him, except for Cyrus who is a true enigma which pisses Eddie off because he’s supposed to be the fucking enigma here, dammit.

Yeah Yeah, he's a Metalhead. Tell Us MORE About His Taste in Music in your story: We are working off Flight of Icarus rules so he’s got a taste in the mouth for Howlin’ Wolf style blues, real down and dirty Detroit shit. He also loves a sleazeball, so enter Tom Waits and when he’s feeling REALLY sentimental, Leonard Cohen. Eddie loves to bite a thumb so he has some punk spinning too—Richard Hell, MC5, The Cramps, and reluctantly Iggy and the Stooges. They’re Al’s favourite so kind of tainted. Last but not least, I think that Johnny Cash’s Live From Folsom Prison album gets a lot of play. Particularly Cocaine Blues and Dark in the Dungeon, which he’s definitely incorporated into some campaign. He does NOT listen to CHICK MUSIC because he’s a loser boy (Wayne has a Linda Ronstadt record that makes him cry).

What are his views on romance? On sex? Eddie Munson falls in love fourteen times a day because at the be all and end all, he’s an artist and he’s sensitive as shit. Let’s get one thing straight—he can flirt to beat the band, once anyone gives him the time of day. Which they don’t. But in his mind? He’s a silver tongued Casanova. It’s just easier to use on people he hates. Once he has a crush, he has an obsession, even if he’s oftentimes too chickenshit to act on it. Cue pulling pigtails in the playground routine. He wants so badly to worship someone and be worshipped in return, okay, it’s reciprocal worshipping—give him mutual pathological obsession or give him DEATH. He wants to build a shrine, and will, to the right person. He’ll preoccupy his mind with every detail about them to the point where, yeah, it is borderline kind of stalkery but he’s still 18 years old. Speaking of, sex? Yeah, he’s done it. Badly. He’s like to do it again, goodly. He’d like to do it with someone that wasn’t treating it like an experiment, someone who’d let him slobber all over them and rut and keen and whine like the hound in heat he fucking feels like. He has no goddamn control! He experiences pleasure in a total headrush, never been able to stay cool and sexy and commanding a day in his life. He just wants, wants, wants and he burns so hot. Eddie wants so clumsily that it comes out at the most inappropriate times, like the nurse’s office after he gets his fist busted. He’s not some sex god, just some dick with an overeager cock. But he sure is willing to put in the work.

Is he optimistic or pessimistic? Pessimistic on the surface, the life is shit and then you die so might as well do some whippits poster boy but so so secretly, Eddie holds the tiniest flame of hope that someday, somehow, things will get better. At the very least easier. That he’ll grow into his bones somehow, or someone will help soothe him into them. That he’ll feel some kind of belonging. Because he does want that, really. Some soft place to land.

Where or with whom is he most comfortable? Those pockets of alchemy at Hellfire Club when he’s got a rapt audience. With Ronnie, sitting on the sagging couch outside his trailer. Playing chauffeur to a certain princess across-the-way.

What are his views of his future? What are his hopes/dreams? Pie in the sky? Cover of Circus with his cheeks out, duh. A Grammy or two, his own metal club, a published fantasy author, shit. He’s not askin’ for the world, here! But honestly, Eddie’s view of his future is 18 year old misanthropist bleak. He hasn’t even considered college as an option, not that he’d get there with his grades. He figures he might just start selling full time for Rick once (if) he graduates then hopefully have the good enough sense to take his money and split to Chicago or someplace. Might hit it lucky when he’s played in a couple more iterations of Corroded Coffin and con someone into letting him be a session guitarist—which wouldn’t be the cover of Circus, but would still be a huge deal! But as much as an ego game as he likes to talk, he’s got this terrible, looming feeling that he’ll never leave Hawkins alive.

What do you imagine his future looks like? (If your story is incomplete or if this would be a spoiler you're not willing to share, you can skip this question.) I’ll give you a couple details, because I am writing a sequel about this. Picture a brief stint in Indianapolis. Meaner, grizzlier, bartender-ier, going on a decade of heartbreak, performing at his sexual best but nearing burnout and about to turn 30 with some side dealings at home that are edging out of the side and into the forefront. Heavy is the hand that wears the ring. You look so much like your father!

Anything else you'd like us to know about your Eddie/your story? He is so full of love and piss and vinegar. He is going to end up cherished. Like, violently so.

Optional Vulnerable Question: Why do you write fics for Eddie Munson? I love a tragedy touched smartass who folds at the first sign of affection. I want to nourish him and eat him up like the witch from Hansel and Gretel. Or have Lacy do it for me, whatever.

tagging: YOU. READING THIS. Not KIDDING IF YOURE READING THIS GET TO WORK

[ashes-writing]

stranger things ● the new girl pt 7 ● g.emerson

warning

heaaavy kissing / saliva shared. petnames (bunny, sweetheart, angel), PDA, a lil angsty but sweet, there is/will still be bullying, confrontations, smoking/ w**d / alch + parentless house parties cos teen drama/romance, total absence of sci fi plot and no deaths. 1 through 3 did not happen, either. Gareth is aged to 18 so.. season 4 = his senior year.

<- reader/you is female, with female parts, clothing/personality/hair/petnames and nicknames. this is self indulgent, when is it not with me, and i am.. not even a little sorry either.

word count

2762 exactly. for any missing context part 6 <- click to read.

summary

He pulls you onto his lap and you lock eyes, swallowing down a huge lump the second it starts to build in your throat. “Gareth?” you question, confused.. Because it hasn’t quite clicked for you.

taglist + shoutouts

-- taglist is here <- click to be taken to the doc and added. if you're here for eddie/steve or other characters and you don't want to be tagged in my Gareth writings, please lmk.

@tbmunson bestie. babes..babeeee. i love you sooooo much and i really hope you're having a good day today. also, this may be hella fluffy, oops rip. your daily reminder that you inspire me.

@littlestarfighter03

@nana90azevedo you are toooo sweet, omg. your comments had me giggling and kicking my feet and you don't know how much they mean to me, you really do not. thank you!

@allelitesmut

@chaoticcancer

@caravelofthesun

@dylanwritesgood

@eddiemuns0nl0ver

@just-a-blue-nerd

@slyisbehindyou

other links

masterlist ● gareth's masterlist ● about + rules

You’re settled in on the sofa with a stacked plate of grilled cheese and Sprite. Young and The Restless is just starting but you can’t pay attention, your mind won’t just shut down like you want it. You keep thinking about what happened at school this morning. And it’s not even the rumors -or Molly choosing something you told her, a traumatic time for you, to use against you and hurt you when it’s not even true.

It’s the fact that no thanks to these stupid rumors starting up all over again, you’re almost absolutely certain that by the time Gareth Emerson hears them, he’s going to write you off like so many others in the past.

And you don’t even blame him, it’s not like you were a thing. You wanted to be with him. Everything feels a little better when he’s around. But now, you think to yourself, that’s likely not going to happen.

You take a few shaky breaths and wipe your eyes. 

“I’ll get her back.” you mumble.

You’ve only just taken a bite of the sandwich and it’s like sandpaper in your mouth but you refuse to just not eat. You’ve just tossed the sandwich back onto the plate for now when you hear a vehicle door slam shut.

,, probably just the lady next door.” the thought comes and you turn your attention back to attempting to follow the storyline of the soap opera, sipping your Sprite. And you don’t even realize you’re crying again until you feel the warmth of tears slipping down your cheeks again.

The silence in the house is almost oppressive right now. It’s crushing.

A little too thick, a little too much. You’re overthinking everything. 

The door’s being knocked on and you jump a little at the burst of sound as it intrudes.

“Damn it, guys.” you mumble as you slip off the couch. You’re not even bothering with the formality of actual clothing because you’re at least 90 percent sure that it’s just Mari, Edie and Adi because they called earlier and even though you told them you were fine a thousand and one times, they said they’d come over later. After school.

So you’re not expecting to throw open the door to your parents house and find Gareth Emerson standing on the other side. Leaning in the doorway, filling up the frame. 

“G-gareth?”

His cheeks are on fire and he doesn’t have the first fucking clue what to say. But he knows you’ve been crying, from the looks of it, you’ve been crying since you walked out of school earlier. He steps up to you, pulling you closer by the hips. “ ‘S okay.. C’mere, bunny.” he’s quiet. Coaxing you right into his arms which he wraps around you. You break. And you’re crying all over again, soaking the white part of his Hellfire shirt in inky mascara tears. All he does is stand there and hold you, hands moving up and down your back to soothe you.

You’re choking up as you tell him everything, all of it. Including every single rumor that went around about you at your old school so he’d have context as to why you’re so upset right now. 

“Hey.. Shhh.” Gareth coaxes, gripping your jaw to make you look up at him because even though it’s killing him to see you this upset, he wants you to know that he doesn’t believe anything Molly’s been saying to anyone who will listen all day. He had a grand speech well-planned and rehearsed on his way over, but.. He’s in front of you right now and that’s all gone out the window.

,, She loves you, man. Do somethin’. Fix this.” the thought comes and it’s what prompts him to pick you up, step into the house as he’s holding you in his arms. You’re deposited on the couch and he goes back to your front door, shutting and locking it.

You’re still making an attempt to process why he’s even here to begin with, Hawkins is really, really small.. Surely he had to have heard everything Molly started up all over again -or some twisted and over the top version of it. He seats himself on the sofa again and pulls you close. Lets you lay your head on his shoulder. And for a long pause, minutes that drag out to hours it seems, you both sit there in total silence. You’ve calmed down just a little, he can hear and feel the way your breath has leveled out.

“You’re missing lunch, Gareth.” you mumble quietly. He glances down at you and shrugs. “It’s not a big deal. They were having that congealed whatever anyway.”

“O-oh.” you stammer around the O and take a shaky breath or two. And you can’t take it anymore, you have to ask the question.

“You uh.. You’re here. And still talkin’ to me.” you go quiet, the question you were about to ask falling flat because you got halfway there and you realized that maybe you don’t want the answer after all. 

It clicks for him then. The one thing you were most afraid of. Probably a big reason you left school walking after you got out of the principals office earlier. And normally, he wouldn’t even let himself have the teeniest sliver of hope but he heard you say everything you did out of your own mouth this morning. 

You’re in love with him.

And he’s in love with you too.

It’s something he’s still trying to get his head around, even now as he sits here in your living room.

He pulls you onto his lap and you lock eyes, swallowing down a huge lump the second it starts to build in your throat. “Gareth?” you question, confused.. Because it hasn’t quite clicked for you.

His hand raises, rests against the column of your neck. The pad of his thumb rolls over your cheek. “I didn’t believe her.”

You blink. “You..” you go quiet. The relief washes over you in waves and you’re shifting around in his lap. Trying to get comfortable without  invading his personal space too much because you’re just so afraid to do anything that might mess everything up right now. Gareth’s hand lowers and both arms wrap around your body, pulling you against him completely. He keeps his arms around you and you lean your head against his shoulder, your nose nuzzled into the side of his neck.

You don’t mean to blurt it out when you do but it comes out anyway. “The worst part about all of this was that I was afraid you would believe her and I…” you go quiet because you stop yourself when you realize you’re probably just about to say too much. Your face hidden in his neck, you can feel the way his pulse is beating strong and steady and you focus on that. Calming yourself down.

“You what, bunny?” Gareth asks after a second or two of trying -and failing, to pull himself together because the way you’re melted against him while sitting on his lap is definitely having an effect right now and the last thing he wants is to make things weird or awkward. “C’mon. You can tell me anything, okay?I-I mean it.”

You nod. Sit up a little and now you’re staring down at the way your bodies connect as you sit in his lap. “I didn’t wanna lose you.. Because of this. I’m..” your breath catches in your throat before you can get anything else out and Gareth raises a hand, gripping your jaw so you have to look at him. “You’re..” he prompts quietly, “Just say it.. Please?”

“ I’m in love with you.” you mumble, swallowing hard as you say it. “You don’t.. Like.. you don’t have to feel the same way, it’s okay if you don’t, really, I–” your words are cut off because he leans in, his mouth collides with your mouth, a thick pink tongue splitting your lips to massage alongside your own after he’s ran it over your teeth. One of his hands leaves your hips and tangles up in the thick mess of hair on your head, tugging your mouth  deeper until you’re breathless and he’s panting, trying to catch his breath without breaking the kiss because right now, it’s the last thing he wants to do. “What if I wanna, bunny? What if I feel that way too, huh?”

“You.. you do?” your words are swallowed by the slow and steady deepening of the kiss and as the shock starts to wear off, you both pull apart to breathe and stare at each other. Wild eyed and breathless. You raise a hand, settling it against the column of his neck as you continue to try and process what he’s just said.

It changes everything.

Unless he doesn’t want it to, you think to yourself, the thought makes you frown just a little and he picks right up on the little frown, leaning forward, into you. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothin, it’s just I..” you laugh at yourself. ,, do not push this. Just let it happen. Stop trying to push for more. “ 

You shove the thought out.

“C’mon.” he coaxes, “Talk to me, beautiful girl.”

And he’s doing it again, he’s making you look him in the eyes. And it’s him, you can’t keep anything from him, it’s nearly driven you crazy to keep your feelings hidden the past few weeks. You swallow hard. “I wanna be.” you trail off because it’s so hard to blurt it out right now. “Your girl.” you finish softer, voice barely a whisper. But he hears it and he shifts the way he’s sitting because he’s trying not to have a raging boner in the middle of a very delicate situation because he wants all his focus to be on you and what you need right now.

“You..” he’s trying to process. He feels like he could fly, what you’ve just said is everything he wants too. His hands slide up and down your sides before settling on your face. His forehead meets yours and he chuckles quietly, cheeks burning hot, a feverish blush covering his entire body. “ You wanna be my girl? All mine?”

You nod. You can feel your skin burning. You shift in his lap because you’re trying to get closer, you’re trying to get ready to hide your face in the side of his neck again. But then he’s guiding your mouth back to his own, greedy. Hungry. A kiss filled with teeth as they nip your lips and tug until you feel aching, bruises raise to the surface of your soft pout. As the kiss breaks, he pulls away and he’s just staring at you. Quiet. Trying to process everything because today has been a whirlwind.

“You are, bunny.” he mumbles at last, leaning into you all over again. His forehead against yours and big blue eyes fixed intently on you. Your hand raises, fingers clutch against the front of his Hellfire shirt, gripping to pull him in even closer, his mouth deepening the kiss, his tongue massaging yours lazily. You’re giggling quietly through the last of your tears. 

“I think everybody ganged up on Molly. She left cryin.” Gareth mutters against the crown of your head when the kiss breaks for a while and you settle in against him. You look up, nodding. “I should’ve just punched her this morning.” 

“But it’ll be okay now, alright? I mean that.”

You take a few shaky breaths and you nod because you know. He isn’t lying. He does mean it.

He’s probably the only person you actually feel like you can trust.

“Gare?”

“Yeah, sweetheart?” he’s staring down at you, a pounding heart and the only thought in his brain is that he’s the definition of a lucky bastard. He caresses your cheek and you open your mouth only to close it several times. You’re frustrated with yourself, he can tell. Your cheeks are pink. He leans down to press a kiss against your hairline. “Just say it, ‘s okay.”

“C-can I come with you? You know… to your Hellfire thing? Don’t wanna be..” you start to say you don’t want to be alone but it’s still very much ingrained deep in you that you’re pathetic if you need someone, a holdover from all the times you’ve had to tell yourself that just to keep from trying to reach out, trying to let people in.

“Course, bunny.” he answers and you smile up at him. The two of you settle in, the television becomes mostly background noise until Gareth leans forward, reaching out for the remote you’ve sat on the low table in front of the sectional, bringing you with him as he leans. You give a weak laugh and he kisses the bridge of your nose. “How d’ you even watch this crap, angel?”

You shrug. “General Hospital is better but Helena, that bitch was on today and she annoys me so..” you laugh softly, the laughter dying away as soon as you realize blue eyes are locked on your lips and he’s leaning in all over again.

“I’m never gunna be able t’ stop doing this.” he says it as if he’s apologizing as his mouth meets yours and you sigh into the kiss, your mouth falling open to accommodate his tongue’s invasion easily. “I’m never gonna want you to stop.” you admit, breathless.

–

The door to the drama classroom opens and Eddie chuckles to himself. ���You finally make it, Emerson?”

“What the hell happened?” Mike Wheeler asks, fuming to himself about having to wait to start the campaign as Gareth flips him off and takes his usual seat at the table after he’s dragged up a chair so you can sit beside him.

“Everything okay?” Eddie asks, gazing at you in concern. You smile and nod. Just the slightest hint of color creeps into your cheeks. Doe eyes settle on a few telling marks on both your neck and Gareth’s neck and he locks eyes with Gareth to mouth, “Finally?”

You’re toying with the necklace he slipped onto your neck and Eddie catches sight of light glinting off of the silver skull, nearly choking. 

He nods to Gareth, calls his name when he realizes Gareth isn’t actually paying attention. “Emerson, hey.. C’mere, man.”

Gareth wanders over to the side of the classroom Eddie’s standing on, staring out the window.

“What?”

“She’s wearing your necklace. Wanna explain? Did you fuck? What happened?”

“Later, man. But no. No, we  didn’t, okay? But..” Gareth chuckles quietly. “She is my girl. Mine. So none of that stupid flirty shit, alright?”

Eddie chuckles, and he’s snickering until he sees the stern warning look in his best friends blue eyes. “Her little friend the future librarian.. Uh.. she’s more my speed, dude.”

Gareth nearly chokes at this and he’s gaping. “Since when?”

Eddie blows out an exasperated breath and he’s stammering, he’s grumbling and he’s tugging at his hair. “We uh.. We may or may not have had words earlier… I-In the hall. She was goin’ t’ go into the bathroom and kick in the stall door on Molly before she left. Maybe I calmed her  down. Either way, I physically prevented Molly’s murder and Edie, she uh.. She was not happy about it. How’s somethin’ so cute so goddamned murdery, dude?”

Gareth’s doubled over laughing by now because of all of the group, Eddie Munson is the last person one would think gets flustered easily, but here he is. Face all flushed, stammering over his words. Frustrated beyond belief. “Oh, it’s bad bad.” Gareth says it as he stops laughing.

“Fuck you, Emerson.”

“Can we start the damn campaign now?” Mike Wheeler is frustrated.

“Keep your goddamn pants on, kid.” Eddie replies, giving the black haired boy a stern look. Gareth sinks down into the chair beside the one he dragged over for you to sit in and you lean in against his side, resting your head on his shoulder as you sit in on the beginning of a new DnD campaign.

And from what you’re seeing, it definitely looks like a fun game. You’re just not entirely sure you’d ever be able to come close to grasping the complex rules and the thought of an entire character you’d have to come up with, well.. You know you couldn’t do that.

But it’s fun to watch your boyfriend.

At the thought, your heart’s fluttery all over again.

Gareth Emerson is your boyfriend.

This is.. Not how you saw the day ending, not at all.

[tuzesdays]

tuz... for the writing prompt... dancing in the kitchen while cooking dinner pLEAAAAASE IM ON THE FLOOR

(Hope you have a good day/evening :D)

oh you guys liked that one. awesome, so did i.

WORDCOUNT: 1335 | Fluff, Domestic (obv) | No warnings

Sun took a liking to cooking that you probably should have expected.

It was a surprise, the first time he had offered to help Obi-wan as your friend had been – in hindsight, a little desperately – trying to force some normalcy back into your lives. Maybe it was because you were still more than a little nonverbal at the time, still recuperating from the events that led you to taking shelter in Obi’s family home, or maybe it was because you always thought Sun was a little too dedicated to cleanliness to consider enjoying the mess that comes with cooking; honestly, considering his long standing love of arts and crafts, you really shouldn’t have been surprised.

More than a year down the line, the new love of cooking hasn’t died yet.

You have a grocery budget now, something that was not just redundant but completely unneeded before you began living together. The two of you actually buy ingredients instead of ramen packs and microwave meals, and then you really use them. He charms the old coupon champions in the store isles and makes small talk with the clerks. He towers above the shelves and insists on using cloth shopping bags.

It's… bizarre. Or it was bizarre, before you got used to it – and every time you tease him for trying to become a house husband, he teases you right back with your dedication to updating the grocery list.

You and your lists. Never ending.

“Something on your mind?”

Oh right. You’ve been staring at him for the last few minutes to the tune of ‘Grilled Cheese’ by Peach Face, completely lost in the melody. “I… might’ve forgotten.”

He doesn’t look at you again, focusing back in on the pan he’s stirring ingredients in and occasionally looking at the pot of pasta boiling to the side. The smells of chicken, garlic, spinach, parmesan, and a bunch of other stuff that you didn’t have a hope of keeping track of waft through the house: there’s a reason you’re not the one cooking. You were never good at this stuff, had always elected to buy food when the things in your apartment didn’t cut it. “Was it… about the market this weekend?”

“No, but thanks for reminding me.” Farmers markets. Knowing him, it’ll be an all-day event.

“Not the market.” Sun hums along to the soft tune as he thinks. “Future dinners?”

You smile. “Have I ever managed to plan a meal before?”

“Hope springs eternal, Sunbite.” He sets the spatula he was using to the side and picks up the wooden spoon he’s been stirring the pasta with. “Something for tomorrow?”

Your gaze wanders as you try to think. “Maybe…?”

“Getting closer then! Is it a laundry day?”

“Nope.” But the idea of clothes…

“How about a gardening day?”

“Not that either.” Gloves…?

“It shouldn’t be one of the Rulebreaker’s school events.”

“It’s not, we don’t have to be at one of those until next month.” Unless Gregory gets in yet another fight that one of your patchwork group has to attend a conference for. But no – he knows it’s too soon after the last one. He may be a little shit, but the kid is still wicked smart; he won’t pick another fight if he doesn’t know you’d take his side for it. Little brat. “The, um, the competition he’s in.”

“We still think the robotics is worrying.”

You absolutely agree. “He’s allowed to choose his own coping projects. Unfortunately.” The second that child learns to use a welding torch, you and your boys are going on vacation. You’re not dealing with that chaos. The mental image of Gregory wearing the visor, gloves, and apron of heavy metalworking is enough to give you nightmares.

Oh fuck! You gasp in realization. “That was it! Okay, no more guessing, we’re good.”

“Do tell?”

“It’ll be a surprise.” You pull out your phone and do a quick search for cooking aprons with dumb puns on them, pleased to find there’s a nice variety. On top of that, there are a bunch of different ‘kiss the cook’ ones that shouldn’t be as tempting as they are. “A gift, not a day plan.”

That gets you a wide, excited smile, Sun turning away from the stove to approach you – you quickly lock your phone again so he doesn’t see the screen. He looms over your seat at the table, bending at the waist so the two of you could be face-to-face. “You’re going to spoil us.”

You lean in smugly, unbothered by the closeness. “Should I save it for the holidays? Only six more months to go.”

“Don’t tease!” The top of his faceplate bonks lightly against your forehead before retreating again. “And you say that as if we don’t get the gift of your company every day!”

That gets a laugh out of you. “Sun, I could be passed out on the couch for an entire day and you’d still be happy about it.”

“Funny how that works, doesn’t it?”

You angle your head past him. “The burner’s still on, Poppy.”

He makes a huff sound, jokingly irritated at the deflection, and goes back to the stove. “This should be just about done! A quick stir, some more parmesan to top it all off… and voilà! Now for those noodles—”

“Smells great.”

“I would think so!” He switches off both burners after a moment and carries the pot of noodles to the sink, pouring everything into a drainer. You watch as the steam from the spilling water rises to drift against his rays, the slowly dying sunlight outside and the lights around the kitchen throwing the clouds into stark relief.

Little moments like these just remind you how fucking pretty he is. How pretty both of your boys are – in a wardrobe tailored to their size, Sunny’s cleanliness obsession making all shirts freshly ironed while the same instinct leads him to rolling up the sleeves past his elbows while cooking, hooked in place by sewn on star-shaped buttons you had given him ages ago. Loose cargo pants reminiscent of his jester clothes, not falling in the same places but comfortable all the same – you remember the day they discovered what decorative patches were, ironing and sewing on a select few to those pants as soon as they got their hands on some: on each pocket is a bright yellow or blue star. He’s taken their usual bells off for cooking, but the ribbons lay on the table in front of you, ready to be fastened again.

You nudge one of the bells absent-mindedly as you hear the song change. ‘Hey Lover’ by Daughters of Eve. Fitting.

You’re so gone for these boys. “Is this the favorites playlist?”

“It is.” He shakes out the drainer and carries the pasta back over to the stove, dumping it all into the pan with a small flourish and mixing so the noodles are coated in sauce. “And this is dinner, done at last! Now just a moment…”

“Bowl?”

You get up to serve yourself, but get intercepted by an arm at your waist. “Not quite!”

He moves into a more familiar hold. You feel the warmth in your chest burst and overflow.

If you had the mind to care, you would notice that the smile that breaks out is one that you can’t help, or that your posture straightens to match his own. Of course, you don’t give a shit about anything other than the person pulling you into a turn around the kitchen floor – your feet step fluidly around each other, this very dance having been gone through maybe a thousand times by now but no less exciting.

As the first ring of ‘true love and understanding’ echoes around a room already full of warm, homey smells and your own soft laughter, you realize, not for the first time and certainly not the last, that this moment – and every moment that follows, forever – is what you had always been working for.

This moment.

[abstractnaturaldisaster]

Steddie Flower Shop / Tattoo Parlor AU

And that’s a wrap! I hope y’all enjoy this last installment! 

Part One I Part Two I Part Three I Part Four I Part Five I Part Six I Part Seven I Part Eight I Part Nine I Also on AO3!

***

Eddie was nervous. It didn’t help that his shop was closed and he had nothing to occupy him other than thinking about Steve coming over that night. Most years it was a welcome rest to shut down for the day after the hectic Valentine’s Day season but today he was pacing the apartment convinced he’d forgotten something. He’d pretty much spent all day freaking himself out about his first date with Steve. 

Eddie had decided he was going to cook for Steve. Mrs. De Lucas had taught Eddie some of her secret family recipes and he’d decided to pull out all the stops and make homemade pasta and tiramisu for dessert. He was just putting the finishing touches on the sauce when he heard a soft knock at the door.

“Steve! Welcome to my humble abode,” Eddie said as he held the door open for Steve.

“Thanks, Eddie.” Steve said as he walked in. Steve was holding a little ceramic pot. He must have noticed Eddie glancing down at it so Steve added, “Oh, I was going to bring you flowers but I felt like as a florist you’d probably be sick of them so this is aloe vera? I figured if you cook a lot you might also have to deal with cooking-related burns and aloe vera is really good for soothing them.” 

“Aw, babe. That’s so thoughtful!” Eddie praised. Steve flushed bright red and Eddie thought it was the cutest thing he’d ever seen. “Can I get you a glass of wine?”

“Sure, thanks, Eds.”

“Of course! Cheers to our first official date, Steve,” Eddie said as they clinked glasses.

“I dunno, I think spending eight hours together in a van probably counts.”

“I was working, it absolutely doesn’t count,” Eddie disagreed.

“We had romantic music, we ate food, you kissed me goodbye, sounds like a date to me, babe,” Steve argued.

“Absolutely not. You playing cheesy music and eating sandwiches over my workbench with Robin and Chrissy does not a date make,” Eddie laughed. “A homemade dinner, wine, dessert? This is a date, sweetheart.”

“I’m only letting you win because you feed me,” Steve answered.

“Using me for my kitchen. Shame on you, Harrington.”

“At least you’re going into this with open eyes, hun,” Steve said, “I have high expectations after that fucking grilled cheese.”

“Oh man, the pressure!” Eddie joked as he grabbed the pasta and garlic bread and herded Steve over to the small kitchen table.

“This smells so good, Eds.”

“A De Lucas’ family recipe. I hope you don’t mind Italian.”

Eddie and Steve ate and gossiped about Robin and Chrissy and some of the crazy bouquets they had delivered the day before. Eventually, Eddie grabbed the bottle of wine and led Steve over to his couch. They continued chatting and Steve moved to lean against Eddie’s shoulder. Eddie reached his arm around Steve and started rubbing small circles into Steve’s collarbone.

“Are you trying to seduce me, Munson?” Steve asked.

“It depends. Are you feeling seduce-able?” Eddie answered.

Steve looked up at Eddie with big brown eyes and nodded. Eddie leaned down and kissed Steve. It was even better than yesterday. Eddie suspected it might have something to do with the fact that they weren’t being interrupted by Robin and Chrissy whooping.

“Steve,” Eddie basically moaned and pulled at his sweater, “Can I take this off of you?”

“Yes,” Steve answered. Eddie would have been self conscious about how far gone he already was but Steve was right there with him.

“So pretty for me, baby,” Eddie said as he started to kiss down Steve’s torso. He positioned himself on the floor in between Steve’s legs and continued to kiss and tease and bite as he made his way to the waistband of Steve’s joggers.

“Oh, Eds.”

Eddie would have done just about anything to hear Steve make those sounds again. He started to run his hands over Steve’s hips, moving lower as Steve started to cant his hips off of the couch. As Eddie was about to ask if he could finish undressing Steve, he noticed something that was a little too dark to be a mole. It was sort of a weird shaped blobish thing on just above Steve’s hipbone.

“Stevie, you do have a tattoo!” Eddie exclaimed.

“Oh shit, Eddie,” Steve tried to pull Eddie back up but Eddie was persistent. He got very close but he still couldn’t figure out what on earth Steve’s tattoo was supposed to be. 

“Steve. Do you have a tattoo of a dick on your hip?” Eddie asked. Steve burst out laughing and grabbed the back of Eddie’s shirt to pull him back onto the couch.

“No, Eddie. God this is embarrassing.”

“You don’t have to tell me about it, if you don’t want to,” Eddie answered as Steve buried his head into Eddie’s neck.

“Oh gosh, no, it’s just so stupid. Robin and I decided to get a matching tattoo like ages ago when we were bored at one of our dead end summer jobs.”

“Why’d you land on a penis?”

“It’s not, shut up.” Steve whined.

“Are you sure?” Eddie looked back down trying to imagine what else it could possibly be.

“Just listen! Okay so the place we were working was across from some shitty tattoo parlor so we spent hours pouring over the internet for ideas. It’s also important that you know we had also learned how to do the handshake from the Parent Trap.”

“I cannot wait to see how that’s relevant.”

“You’re impossible,” Steve scoffed. “Anyways. We couldn’t come up with any decent ideas until Robin thinks we should each get half of something. She thought it would be so funny to get a tattoo that we could bump together when we did the hip portion of the handshake.”

“This is even better than I could have imagined. What on earth is it supposed to be half of?” Eddie asked.

“A butterfly?” Steve offered. He looked so nervous Eddie couldn’t stand it.

“Stevie,” Eddie laughed, “I promise I’m not laughing at you. It’s just so cute and also so unfortunate.”

“No, it’s truly awful,” Steve agreed. “It was so bad. We thought we were so cool and we didn’t even realize what it looked like until we left the tattoo shop. I could never bring myself to get rid of it but I also never got another tattoo. I was so worried it would come out accidentally raunchy again. Robin kept her’s too but she got a bunch of other small random tattoos in the same area so it’s not, like immediately, obvious.”

“I can’t believe I was worried you’d make fun of my tattoos. At least I never got an accidental dick friendship tattoo,” Eddie teased.

“You’re the worst,” Steve said. 

Steve ran his hands over Eddie’s tattoos and Eddie’s breath hitched a little whenever Steve’s fingers ghosted over a sensitive area.

“I’m just teasing, baby,” Eddie kissed the top of Steve’s head.

“What’s this one from?” Steve asked and pointed to a small coffin tattoo.

“That one, and these bats over my elbow were for my high school band, Corroded Coffin. We still play every once in a while but not as often as we did back then.”

“Do you have a favorite?”

“I dunno, they’re all pretty random honestly. I have a tiny delivery van I’m pretty fond of,” Eddie showed Steve the rendering of the De Lucas’ van on his left bicep. Steve dutifully pressed a kiss into his arm. “Oh, and this one was supposed to be a ravioli but it kind of just looks like a ruffle-ly square,” Eddie laughed as he found the little tattoo on his rib.

Eddie and Steve spent the rest of the evening laughing together about stupid tattoos and meaningful tattoos. Eddie looked down at Steve laying in his lap, recounting his least favorite tattoo he’s ever given and Eddie thanked his lucky stars that they found their way to each other. Eddie thought about Steve’s offer to tattoo him and knew one day he’d take him up on it but most of all he knew he was never letting Steve go.

***

Thanks so much for going on this journey with me! I hope y’all like the conclusion of this series. I’m going to take a break for a bit but I have plans for a hockey AU for Stanley Cup season once I recover, lol!

I’m on AO3 @ randomhank! 

Taglist: @a-little-unsteddie @maya-custodios-dionach @eboyawstenn @swimmingbirdrunningrock @sadcanadianwinter @thehumblefigtree @throwbackthrowaway @micheledawn1975 @blisschaoss @vecnuthy @grimmfitzz @spectrum-spectre @croatoan-like-its-hot @momotonescreaming @beckkthewreck @korixae @citrus-owl @baron-zemo-trash @sleepdeprivedflower @nuagedemots @lololol-1234 @books-and-current-obsessions @acrolius @mightbeasleep @vi-an-te @gregre369 @i-must-potato @vampireinthesun  @steveisabicon @child-of-cthulhu @whimsicalwitchm @aceflavouredyougurt @that-bi-gremlin99 @oxidantdreamboat @goodolefashionedloverboi @notaqueenakhaleesi @briceslayed @raisedbylibrarians @bejeweledbaby @avacrebs @magpiemuseum @majesticenbypancake  @r0semaryyy @nerdsconquerall @lifeisnotsobadonceyoustopcaring @shiyshy2004 @zerokrox-blog @straight4joekeery

[that-one-anxious-mango]

Heyyy ☺️ I love this series sooo much, it is so nice to see Austin stories that involve a black reader. Not having to edit the story in my head to make it fit me is wonderful 🥰. For your Drabble event could you do either first date or a special date that they have had? Thank you 💕 💕

20 Questions.

Summary: It’s a in-house date night with Austin and his best girl. Where you get to know them and they get to know each other!

Contents: Fluff ofc! Mentions of deceased relatives. Little angst if you squint. Slight steaminess. Austin and his best girl being the cutest.

A/N: Hi Beautiful Humans! It’s me! I hope y’all of you are having a wonderful time. Just wanted to go ahead and drop this off for you guys and also give some special shout-outs to:

@pennyroyalcreep for not only this lovely prompt, but also for your continued love and support with my work. ❤️

@purejasmine one of the sweetest people I know and a absolutely amazing writer. Thanks for always supporting and creating.

I also wanna thank @adoreyouusugar , @denised916, and @homebodybirkin2003 whose comments never cease to make me smile.

And to everyone else who I may have missed. THANK YOU. I truly appreciate it.

Moving on I am also officially starting a tag list. As I plan to upload some things this week. So if you’d like to be added please leave a :) in the comments.

Thank you all!

P.S Everyone feel free to PLEASE comment and reblog. Also send me letters with idea and prompts. Love hearing from you all. Much love! * hugs*

-------

Today was Friday.

Which also meant it was date night. 

And with it being quite gloomy outside for the usual LA weather the two of you had decided that it'd be the perfect day to have a in-house date night. You insisted that tonight you would to try and cook for your man a simple meal of grilled cheese and tomato soup.

A skeptical but supportive Austin would go on to happily watch you not only blacken all attempts at the grilled cheese, but also burn the poor tomato soup that you forgot to add enough water to.

And once the tears started rolling, in real Austin fashion he'd wrapped you in a blanket and placed you on the couch promising to return. After cleaning up your food fail he pulled out all the ingredients he needed and made a hell of a good pan of pasta. 

After some feeding, cuddling, finger fucking , and napping. The two of you had decided that a more PG-13 activity was in order. With that you suggested a game that you'd been wanting to play with Austin for a while. Let's get deep: 20 question edition.

" Okay. Here we go, number one." You listened to Austin while you giggled staring down at the stacks of cards in front of you and then back up at Austin, who looked on in amusement. " What movie was so sad that you would never watch it again? " He asked.

" Mmmm." You thought for a minute, there were plenty but really you could only narrow it down to two, " I think I would definitely have to say either Dumbo or Fruitvale Station. I can't choose. You can only watch both once." You affirmed.

" Watching Dumbo is a traumatizing experience that no child of any age should be subjected to at all. Like just the first thirty minutes was enough for me to need a lifelong therapist. And as far as Fruitvale Station goes...I feel that the content overview speaks for itself. It's a beautiful movie, but I could barely make it through til the end." You explained.

Austin nodded, " I seen Dumbo a long time ago when I was little and all I remember is this very strong urge to go hug my mom after watching. " He said making you smile, " But I haven't seen Fruitvale Station. No particular reason why, it's just never happened."

" Understandable." You nodded reaching to grab another card off one of the piles.

" My turn. Two. What's the weirdest thing you find attractive in a person?" You moved your eyes to look at him in curiosity.

Almost immediately he said, " People who floss."

Amused in question you went, " Really? Why? "

" Yeah. I don't know. But in a weird way to me. It shows that you care about yourself. Like babe, do you know how many people don't floss. Ever." He explained.

And the more you thought about it, he was right. Gross.

But lucky for you, you didn't have that problem seeing as your upbringing had made you a bit of a dental freak. So you hit all the points in that department. 

" Yeah. I guess I see your point. " You said just as a thought passed in your mind, " So, do you find it attractive when I floss." You goofed biting a bit of your upper lip.

Laughing at you he leaned over to plant a hardy peck to your lips, pulling away to say, " Makes my dick jump every time, sweetheart." He half whispered sending the two of you into a short fit of laughter.

" Alright alright alright. Next. Three. " He moved to pick up a card, " Describe our relationship in three words." He asked.

Even though you had to think a bit, it didn't take you long before you had your three words, " Meaningful.....Honest.... Adaptive. " You answered.

Eyes glimmering in happiness and satisfaction Austin questioned, " I know these are suppose to be short but, care to elaborate please."

" Well, I feel it's meaningful because literally almost everything we do has some type of meaning behind it. Like when you got me the fern. Or when I gave you the blanket. There's always some type of love behind everything. Plus you mean so much to me and in-turn I mean so much to you, which I guess in general terms makes us meaningful..right?" You giggled trying your best to explain your thoughts in the best way you could.

But Austin understood what you meant, he felt his heart swelling bigger and bigger by the moment, " I see. So what about honest?"

" I feel our relationship is also built around honesty. I know I've told you this before but throughout my life I've encountered a great deal of liars and that's something that I really didn't wanna come into my adult life with. Unavoidable I know. And especially in a relationship. " You began, " But with you, from the day that we sat down, listening to you be so open and honest with me when at the time I was just a complete stranger to you. It made me feel something. And from then on I've never ever had to second guess anything or feel like your keeping things from me. It's refreshing and I value that." You explained.

Austin listened intently thinking back to the first hours the two of you had spent together talking after he'd finished reading you the book. Hearing you talk about how surprised you were hearing Austin talk the way he did shocked him a bit. He hadn't really ever realized just how personal the two of you had gotten in that short amount of time. But to him now, that was just proof that this was something special from the start.

" And finally I think we're adaptive because whether it be your schedule or mine that keeps up from doing traditional couples stuff. We make it work. We adapt to whatever challenge we face together. And that's important." You finished offering a smile.

Austin return your feeling of content displaying a smile of his own. He was so happy to be with you. And to be building the kind of relationship where it's foundations were things like these. Things that would help the two of you last, because all in all. That was goal.

" I think all of that is really accurate and beautiful, mama. I love you." He said reaching for your hand to bring it to his lips and press a gentle kiss to it.

" I love you, Aus." You returned reaching that same hand to palm his cheek.

The two of you continued your little moment before moving forward.

" Number four. Name something that you wish you could do but can't." You asked.

Teasing Austin said, " Gain the ability to say no to you."

You rolled your eyes playfully. " Be serious, Austin."

Laughing some more he says, " I am being serious, woman. You have no idea the power you hold over me. It's like you just know all you have to do is bat those pretty lashes at me and say please, to turn me into a sucker." He informed.

Your smile widen, " Really? "

Austin nodded leaning back against the couch, " Awe don't be coy. Really, mama."

You sounded a ' Hmmph '.

" Well I'll just have to keep that in mind then, huh?" You said shooting him a glance.

Smirking he replied, " Don't go getting too many good ideas."

" I won't."

With that he leaned up to send a squeeze to your thigh before reaching and grabbing another card.

" Mm. This is a good one." Austin's lips twitched up into a smirk while he shot you a look.

" Oh god." You laughed rolling your eyes, " Dare I ask? "

" Yes, please dare." He wiggled his eyebrows and you laughed, " Go ahead then."

" Five, If there's a particular part of you I should touch to get you in the mood. Where would it be?" He questioned.

Playfully humming while placing your pointer finger to the corner of your lips, the curiosity of wanting to know where he thought it was himself popped in," Before I answer where do you think it is, Mr. Butler?"

" Well, honey." He sighed leaning back against the couch," Based on months of bountiful research and exhausting observations. I'd have to say it'd be your neck."

Dammit.

He was right. You loved when he touched your neck. It always left you breathless in more ways than one.

" You sure, " You challenged figuring to keep your cool," Because if I recall your always touching my thighs."

And it was true. If the two of you were laying down to read or watch a movie Austin either had to have his head rested in your lap or hands stuffed between the crevices of your thighs. In the car, Austin only drove with his left hand because his right was specially reserved for your thigh. Whenever your being a little bratty or you say something about yourself that Austin isn't fond of, you better believe he is going to send a good little pinch to your thigh before kissing the spot all better.

" That's because their my particular part of you that gets me in the mood." He informed looking at you while gliding a singular finger up your thigh to the hemline of the shorts you wore. Still never dropping eye contact he continued, " But I know it's your neck because whenever we make love and I run my hand across your neck or decide to take a good little grip on it. That my love, is when you come for me the hardest." He finished.

By now that same finger had turned into a full hand that had found it's way up to get a nice gentle but firm hold on your neck. He softly used it to pull you to him and place a nice sloppy kiss to your lips making a moan release from your throat.

Pulling back he let go with a smug grin on his face to your annoyed but disheveled expression before motioning for you to draw a card while you tried to collect yourself.

Once you had settled the waves below, you a bit shakily grab the next card, clearing your throat, " Okay. Six. What is one activity that makes you feel alive?"

Without a doubt Austin knew his answer, " Easy. Horseback riding. Nothing like making that bond with a horse, the trust you build with them is pure. And then being out and open with nature. Clearing your mind and body. It's refreshing." He explained. " I think that's why filming The Shannara Chronicles was one of my favorite projects so far." He furthered grabbing a sip of the Yerbamate on the table.

" Yep and I'll have to take your word for it, babe." You quickly chirped making Austin sigh. 

Ever since you and Austin had stumbled on the topic of horseback riding one day and you had revealed to him that while you thought horses were absolutely majestic and beautiful from a distance, under no circumstances would you ever consider getting on one. Period. And to him this was a great injustice...almost as big as when you told him you didn't like PB & J's.

You shuddered at the thought.

" Baby for the thousandth time. I'm telling you it's not as scary as you think it is. And you won't know until you try it. That thing with the girl was just a freak accident. That's a exception." Austin tried to argue but still you just shook your head unphased. You knew what you'd witnessed all those years back and you were good.

" Austin." You started, " The poor girl broke her back and part of her collarbone after one of them threw her off and fell on her. I seen it happen. It's like he WWE smushed her ass on the ground." You recalled watching a friend of a friend in high-school's scary interaction with the creature. It was terrifying. " Plus I'm pretty sure that she wasn't exactly ever the same in the membrane after that either." You added thinking about some of the antics the girl had gotten into post injury.

Austin blew out a breath, " Honey, while I think the situation is terrible. I'm pretty sure there was other factors that went into the happening. But I'm telling you that it's not normally like that. You just have to trust yourself and the horse."

Hearing him you still you were unchanged and really wanting to chance the topic so you came up with the compromise, " Okay okay okay. I hear you, Aus. And I'll think about it some more okay." You suggested shooting him a look to send the message that you were ready to move on.

Taking the hint he settled for what you were giving with a somber smile and moved to pick up another card, " So the next one is a little heavier, if that's alright?" Austin questioned staring down at the card.

Feeling like you could fully trust him you nodded, " Go head, babe." You prompted preparing yourself.

" Seven, in your opinion which is worse. Emotional or physical cheating? " He asked looking directly into your eye line.

" Oh." You spoke. It wasn't like you couldn't answer or that this wasn't something the two of you hadn't discussed. It was just a bit of a uncomfortable topic was all.

" Well being honest..." You trailed looking over to his face that was locked in on yours.

" Yeah." Austin encouraged.

Taking a second to collect your thoughts you began, " Like I said before, cheating no matter what is a deal breaker for me. But, being honest I think their equally as bad in opinion. I know anyone can argue it anyway. But the way I see it is that it takes something emotional in the first place to drive someone to cheat physically. I feel like if we're in a exclusive relationship where we're trusting and committing our bodies to only each other and you go and share that part of you with someone else it's a betrayal. And same thing with emotional. If we're in a relationship and I'm giving my all to let you know that there isn't anything that you should feel like you can't come to me about, and you still go and share those parts with someone else. That's also pretty bad so..." You finished looking him directly in eye. 

Austin nodded taking in what you were saying completely. This wasn't his first time hearing you express your expectations when it came to this type of dishonesty, but it was good to hear again all the same, " I hundred precent agree with everything you've said. And vice versa over here. I think our communication is good enough to where we can communicate our needs effectively to each other. But I still want you to know that we're never going to get to that point, honey. That's one of the reasons that ring is on your finger. It's a promise." Austin sincerely confessed making your heart expand.

You peaked down at the promise ring on your finger and then back at Austin.

" I know." 

" Good."

" Alrighty moving on. Eight. Is applesauce suppose to be warm or cold? " You posed.

" Cold." Austin immediately responded, " That's the only right answer."

You nodded, " I whole-heartedly agree. And I'm glad to know that you aren't a nutjob. "

" Noted. Next." Austin laughed picked up a card, " Nine. What is something that you wanna like but just can't? "

You sighed in faked despair, " Saunas. I really wanted to be that girl. The insta-fit chick that has the whole sauna self care bit going. But I realized how much I really don't like being sweaty unless absolutely necessary. " You informed to a smirking Austin. 

Before he could open his mouth you reiterated, " I SAID ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY." 

His hands shot up in defense while he snickered, " All I was going to ask was if you wanted to get sweaty later. But seeing as that wouldn't be absolutely necessary. I guess not." He shrugged.

Smacking your teeth you grabbed a pillow to childishly toss at Austin while you tell him that getting sweaty with him will always be absolutely necessary in your book.  " I'll hold you to that." He says shooting you the infamous look.

" Look forward to it. But first we have to finish this before we start something else, " You remind him picking up a new card, " Ten. Name the most fond memory you have with your moth-" You stopped mid- question instantly regretting asking, you hadn't meant to bring it up.  Idiot.

Quickly you tried to shift and grab another card while shooting him a sympathetic look, " I'm sorry, babe. I- I should have read the card in my head before I read it out lo-"

But he halted your movement softly grabbing your hand, " It's okay It's alright, B-"

" No, Austin it's not I sho-"

" You should just go ahead and let me answer. I promise it's okay. Matter of fact..I want to." He said holding your eye contact to show you he was sincere until you agreed leaning back. 

" I know I've said this in interviews before, but growing up not to faraway from Disney and Knotts Berry, my mom and I would go all the time. Finish all my homework earlier in the day and then drive over. We used to spend hours riding the rides or just sitting on the park benches and talking. Because I was so shy and homeschooled on top of it she was bestfriend. I could sit and talk to her about anything....God I miss her." Austin reminisced bringing a smile to his face. You could see the tears forming in his eyes and in return yours did the same. 

Instinctively you reached out to him which he accepted offering you a spot on his lap.

 You held onto him in silence drinking in his warmth and touch while enjoying the quiet comfort you were offering through the silent intimacy. The two of you stayed just like that for awhile. Your head against his chest listening to the melody of his heartbeat and feeling the weight of his head rested on yours. His hands ran up and down your spine gripping and rubbing. 

You felt oddly harmonious with each other. 

The two of you stayed like that before you let go when the brilliant idea of desert popped in your mind. Remembering that Beatrice had dropped off a royal raspberry drizzle cheesecake. You went to the kitchen coming back with two plates carrying carefully sliced pieces. You were sure this would lighten the mood.

Austin smiled taking his plate and offering you a " Thank you, baby." And a kiss to the temple. 

From there you resumed your game.

" Eleven. What is the most precious or important thing you own? " Austin asked before taking the bite of cheesecake you were offering.

" Um. " You sounded setting the desert plate on the coffee table, " Well, babe. I'm gonna have to cheat a little bit." You confessed.

" Oh. How's that." Austin inquired.

" I'm gonna have to list some things." You confirmed.

Smiling Austin says, " I'll allow it."

" Good. Okay so the most precious and important things I own in no particular order is my promise ring, the blanket my mom made me, our fern, my mother's ring, and my lucky smiley hat." You listed.

" You know I love when you wear that hat." He laughed, " You always look so cute. Remember when you wore it when we went to go see the jazz band in the park. Everyone tried to steal it off of you." 

" Yeah it was quite interesting. Having to fight off people with John Coltrane playing in the back."

"  But anywho. Twelve, If we were role playing. What would you dress me up as? " You bite your lip waiting on his response.  You were extremely curious to hear his answer.

You had to adjust yourself a little bit as you felt the gates to your 'oasis' starting to open up even more than earlier from the way he was looking at you.

" Honestly? " Austin's eyebrow raised.

" Of course. Wouldn't want it any other way." You responded.

" Well, even though it may sound cliché. In my younger years," He laughed, " The whole French maid thing intrigued me for a bit."

Your mouth twitched in a smile, " Know what. I'm not surprised. That checks out." 

" What?! What's that suppose to mean? " 

You laughed at his playfully offended expression while he clutched his chest, " It means that you seem like a french maid kind of man, babe. Classy. You already have this old school charm to you. So it's on-brand that you'd be into that." You elaborated.

He looked at you a second before saying a simple, " Thats fair. "

Tilting his head at you he continued, " So, if a little french maid outfit just happened to appear in your size around here somewhere. And I called to say my office may need some dusting...would you be willing to oblige." He suggested leaning over and biting at his lip.

You leaned in and said, " Oui."

He groaned and blushed a bit in response moving to grab another card only to laugh when he read it, "Right on topic. Thirteen. How many children do you want someday? "

" Um...uh..well it really depends. When I was younger I always wanted to be like cheaper by the dozen or the mine, yours, and ours family. " You giggled thinking about how you wanted a brood of children to homeschool, make three meals a day for, and be driven absolutely crazy by. But as you got older and life took it's fuzzy fun filter off and you began seeing the true colors of the world, that life started to seem less and less ideal. 

You caught Austin's face which was mixed with curiosity and glee. Even though you guys had had some conversations here and there that involved kids he'd never heard this from you before. He was intrigued, "Seriously you wanted twelve kids. You with twelve kids?" He repeated for emphasis.

You laughed, " Yeah. Believe it or not. I like kids and I love my nieces and nephews even though I don't get to see them as much as I'd like. So, in a perfect fantasy world. But being realistic though. I think I would like two or four. I wanna have enough but not too many to where I won't have the energy or the time to give them all as much equal time and attention." You explained.

" I get that. And I like that it's even numbers. So no one will ever be left out of games and they'll be able to pair up when we go out to fairs or do activities." He added with a gleam in his eye.

Austin couldn't lie and say that hadn't thought of what life would be like settling down with you and hearing little footsteps roam the halls. Some could say it was too soon to be thinking about things like that, but he couldn't help. You made him want a future with you.

And vice versa. 

" Exactly. Don't want anyone getting lonely." You agreed trying to play off the blush that had captured your face. You pulled a card, " Fourteen. What's your favorite thing about me?" You asked.

" There's so many different things, honey." Austin sighed trying to rack his brain to be able to just pick one thing, and then he said it, " Your unflinching ability to be kind to everyone."

Your twisted up your face, " Really, you think so? " 

It wasn't like you were saying that you thought you were mean. I mean sure you did your best to try and be nice and kind to everyone you came across, but you weren't the type to just stick that label to yourself. 

" YES REALLY. " Austin emphasized, " You'd literally give anyone the clothes off your back and shoes off your feet. You never cease to amaze me with the grace you have with people even when they don't deserve it. Especially in that situation with the Paps the other week. I know it took a lot not to respond to the name calling and picking but you just kept going and even told the man to have ' a blessed day'." Austin recalled the icky interaction you'd had with paparazzi while out with some friends. 

Shaking your head you waved him off, " I just do what I was raised to do. It's a natural thing. Can't sweat that." You said.

And that's exactly what I want you to teach our children. Austin thought. 

" Yeah, babe. I know. But it still adds to your amazingness. " He concluded picking a card, " Alright. Fifteen. Where is somewhere you've always wanted to go, but never been? " 

Your answer was almost instant, " Italy." 

Austin blinked fast smiling, " That was fast." 

You shyly grinned, " Yeah I know. I didn't mean to say it that fast but that's my number one. I've just always been fascinated by the food and culture. And I really feel like I wanna go and immerse myself in it. Ya' know experience it for myself." You told him of your dream.

It was true too. You could see yourself having authentic pasta and taking walks along the rivers. Finally trying pure gelato. Visiting different museums and taking rides on the gondola. It might sound like cliché tourist behavior but you wanted it all. 

Austin was taking note of how you lit up while talking about the idea of visiting and decided to slip that note into his pocket for later. 

Once you'd finished your mini ranting you picked a card, " Sixteen. Name something that you're weirdly good at? "

Austin noodled on the question. Then you watched him grab one of the unused napkins as he started to twist and pinch it in his hands. 

Curious you asked, " What're you doing, my sweet baboo? "

Feeling fuzzy at the name he responded, " You'll see. Just wait a second, honey." 

So waited and watched him. You found it cute how concentrated he looked. 

 And before you knew it. He was handing you a beautifully crafted rose napkin.

" Awe Austin." You gushed. " It's so cute. How'd you learn to do that? " 

" Ah'. It's just something I randomly picked up once. But I think I've gotten pretty good at it over the years." He said. 

" I hope you know I'm going to force you to do this with all our napkins now, right." You teased. 

" That's fine. Anything for you, mama." He moved closer to you now wrapping a arm around you. 

You didn't know why but him saying that, had made something jump in you. Something hot.

And the closer he got, the more you looked at his face. And the more you looked at his face, the more you wanted to sit on it. 

Not being able to help yourself you managed to move in and capture your his lips with yours. They were always so soft. 

After a minute almost reluctantly he pulled back catching apart of his breath, " Woah, Mama. Wait a minute. As much as I'd love to keep going. Don't you still wanna finish the game first? " He asked cupping your face with a hand.

"Nope." You popped the P, " Not really." You spoke before pulling him back in. He groaned in your mouth at the added friction you brought by started to grind slowly into his lap.

Still once more he found the strength to move away, " You sure?" 

You nodded, but just then a funny little tease came to mind, " Know what. Actually, I do have one last question honey." You said running your against his cheek.

" Go for it, darling."

" Final question. What's your favorite sex position." You questioned positioning yourself up some more. You could see the fire dancing in his eyes and from the way he licked his lips you were sure there were fiery thoughts that accompanied them. 

He sighed biting his bottom lip, " Well. If you must know. As old fashion as it may sound. I'd have to say missionary." Taking a squeeze of your ass.

" Why? " You coyly asked.

" Because I like to be able to look you directly in the eye when I make you come over and over again. The faces you make, always looks like art. Care to be my muse? " He asked taking his hand away from your face to move it along down to your throat.

And with that all you could do was nod before you found yourself on your back, on the couch looking a pretty man in the eye while he gave you pretty amazing orgasms. 

[missbaphomet]

Replies won't let me type the full response so here

@thefalse first of all, there's more to meat/dairy consumption than "it tastes good". There are health issues that necessitate eating meat and animal products, and they provide vital vitamins, minerals, and proteins. Your body will specifically even give you cravings for food high in these nutrients when you're in need. Secondly humans are omnivores, our healthiest diets consist of meat AND plant. Livestock also consumes a huge percentage of food waste that humans, including vegans, can't or won't eat. This can be "ugly" food, food too close to expiration, food you can't keep overnight like baked goods. 30% of the diet of that pork chop that I had last Tuesday was food people threw away. Only 36% of food (by calorie) grown globally is eaten by livestock, 55% makes it onto the plate of a human. 9% goes to biofuels.

If you're as worried about resource scarcity as you claim maybe start trying for renewable resources??? The problem isn't "oh wow animals are so bad for the environment", the problem is "companies and corporations are doing bad things for more money and they're only getting worse." You can stop eating milk and honey all you want, but that's not doing literally anything towards what you claim to be advocating for. We can develop new ways to farm that are sustainable and renewable but we can't unfuck the environment with a simple "just don't buy meat lol". It's infinitely more complex than that.

Did you know it's illegal to harvest seeds you got from a tomato at your local Walmart and cultivate them for yourself? That is assuming the plant hasn't been rendered sterile to enforce reliance on whatever company sells the seeds. I personally think that's a bit more fucked up than having a grilled cheese every so often.

Also no one is arguing animal abuse is good, but it's pretty common knowledge that if you abuse your livestock, it reflects negatively in the product. Put simply: animals that are abused then slaughtered for meat make shitty meat. Is there some sketchy shit happening in factory farming? Abso-fucking-lutely. Many livestock animals live on the bare minimum. I absolutely think that livestock should have good lives. Obviously not every cow and pig and chicken can be raised with the same quality of life as a champion show poodle, but they absolutely deserve a nice pasture and good scratch and a warm, comfortable shelter.

You know who provides these things? Local farmers or even just hobbyists. I have several family friends that raise chickens, and we get more eggs than we could ever hope to reasonably eat as a family of four. If you don't eat the egg, toss it back to the chicken! She will happily eat her eggs because they're nutritional and make a damn fine meal. My family also has connections to a family owned cattle farm, and we split a cow up the middle every year, and did for almost 20 years before the owner got cancer and stopped selling beef to focus on his health, and it was damn good beef too. Pigs aren't prominent in my area, but I'm sure I could find one semi-locally. My DM keeps bees and my family went from basically never using honey to buying it by the pint. I think the only thing that my family buys from the store that we couldn't get anywhere else is milk and cheese because pasteurization and cheese making is a huge expensive process that isn't really reasonable to maintain for just a small family.

Ultimately the argument of "but animal abuse" boils down to factory farming, but the solution then becomes just don't buy meat and other products from factory farms.

[elvensorceress]

fuck it friday woooo

tagged by 💕 @ashavahishta @fiona-fififi @rogerzsteven 

tagging @messyhairdiaz @monsterrae1 @babytrapperdiaz @spotsandsocks @hetrez @homerforsure @masterminddiaz @dickley-buddie @the-likesofus @ajunerose @ghosthunterbuck @megslovesbooks @eddiediazisascorpio @loveyourownsmiilee @ronordmann 💗

So, Eddie vs Feelings is now over 26K? Here’s a silly scene, a whole scene! From it -- wine night with Eddie and Karen.  😘💕

It’s Thursday and Chris is with his friends for the night because there’s no school tomorrow, Buck is visiting Maddie and Jee-Yun, and Hen and Denny are out having a bowling and one-on-one bonding night. Which is how Eddie ends up at the Wilson house with a bottle of Karen’s favorite wine. 

She gives him a hug and even a kiss on his cheek when he hands it to her. They break into it immediately and catch up for a bit before they decide maybe having food with their wine would be smarter than just having wine for dinner. It’s really good wine though. Lots of plum and berry notes with heavy overtones of spices. Karen has good taste. He helps her throw together an assortment of cheese, meat, and crackers, with some grapes, apple slices, tomatoes, cucumbers, and mixed nuts to go with it. 

“See, if we call it a charcuterie board, then we’re fancy grown ups,” Karen says as she sets plates for both of them on the table.

Eddie smiles and sips his probably second but maybe third glass of the Madiran cabernet. “As opposed to borderline-drunk adults who didn’t plan dinner?”

“Yes, exactly.” She grins back and makes herself a cracker sandwich with cucumber slices in between layers of meat and cheese. 

Eddie does the same but adds apple and thinks of how Buck loves tart, thin slices of apple in his grilled cheese because it was how Maddie liked it and always made it for them. Because we’re nothing if not pieces from all the people we love. 

When they’ve demolished a good two-thirds of their definitely planned and thought out meal, and are well into wine bottle number two, because it can’t be three? Right? That’s when Karen twirls a cucumber slice between her fingers, and asks, “You ever kissed a man, Eddie? Or thought about kissing a man?”

And it’s a funny thing. Kissing. 

Putting your mouth against someone else’s. Touching lips together. Touching lips to something else. Making tongues slide around. It’s weird that people do it. And like to do it. Your lips turn all squishy and sometimes slippery. And it’s really easy to miss or bonk noses or clink teeth.

But sometimes… sometimes it’s all warm. Sometimes heat goes to his head and then he’s… swirly and wobbly. It would make his heart flutter like it might fly away. 

Has anyone ever wanted his heart? Really wanted what it is and what it means and who Eddie actually is?

Sometimes, kissing doesn’t taste very good because you can taste whatever is in the other person’s mouth and Shannon loved these nasty pickle things that did not, not, not taste good. Eddie could not kiss her if she’d been eating them. Not even when it was nice kissing her.

Karen tosses her cucumber slice at him, and asks again. 

Has he kissed a man before? Has he thought about it? 

“No. Haven’t. I haven’t kissed…” He’s wanted to though. Hasn’t he. He’s been thinking about what it might be like. Because… because. Eddie isn’t like most men. Most men want to kiss women. He’s heard this a few times. A lot of times. 

But he doesn’t think about kissing someone very often. 

Although, sometimes? Buck leans in really close and tells Eddie all these silly, silly things about saying yes to absolutely, and how wheatgrass and alfalfa have so many nutritional benefits, and how there are 6,800 some natural disasters that happen worldwide every year, and seahorses will twine tails together and find each other despite difficulty swimming and having to hide from predators and it’s actually the males who give birth and the parents stay faithful partners for their whole lives. 

“Seahorses fall in love, Eddie. Isn’t that sweet? They bond for life once they find each other.”

And then Eddie’s wanted that weird, funny, fluttery thing where they squish their mouths together. 

 It’s probably different. Kissing a man. But a kiss is a kiss? Maybe it’s not all that different. How would it taste? How would it feel? Is it different when you’re in love? Could Eddie ever know what that’s like? To kiss someone he knows for sure he’s in love with? 

“You had a girlfriend for two months or something, didn’t you?” Karen asks him suddenly. As if she’s just remembered. Her forehead gets crinkled and confused. 

Eddie was crinkled and confused. His head is a little foggy but he’s pretty sure it was longer than two months. Far too long.

“I didn’t buy that. At all. Ask Hen. When she told me, I swore. Swore she was lying to me. I told her. You, Hen Wilson, are lying. To your wife,” Karen’s tone is the most affronted and she’s so funny. Eddie loves being her friend. He loves that she and Hen are married and happy. It’s nice that two women can be married to each other and happy together. “But then we stalked Annnn-esthesia? Analog? Anachronism! No, no Anathema’s social media. Just a little. We found pictures she posted of both of you. And what does Denny say? Bad vibes. Those aren’t the vibes.” She hums dissent and shakes her head. “I said, that? You and Anaphylaxis? That was all wrong. Didn’t buy it. Nope.”

“I…” He looks at her, and she is a very smart scientist. Rocket scientist. She does actual rocket science. Maybe she would know. She knows all the things. “Do you think I’m…” What’s the word? What’s his question? He has so many questions. “Do you think I’m like you? But with men? Do you think I should be kissing men?”

She giggles, sips her mostly empty glass, and then frowns hard at it when she finds it without wine. “Do you think you should? I didn’t like it. Men are bad kissers. I only kissed two. But they were bad. Teenage me didn’t know. Very sad for poor teenage me.”

“I kissed a woman once. My…” What was she? Besides heart palpitations and gasping for air and chest pain and dizzy, bad, falling over, feeling faint? “My girlfriend? I guess?”

“Anamorphic,” Karen says. “Yes, her.” 

“Yeah. Her. And I really didn’t like it.” Maybe because she wasn’t Shannon, but maybe because she was Ana. Maybe because she wasn’t Buck. He loved Shannon. He loves Buck. He did not love Ana. 

She points at him. “You kissed a girl and didn’t like it? That’s not how the song goes. It’s a stupid song though. Obnoxious heteronormative garbage bullshit. And I know. She’s bad vibes. Bad for you. You don’t have those vibes. You should kiss men then.”

Yeah. Yeah, she really was bad for him. Panic attacks in public places were not it. 

“That’s why I’ve been thinking. I have been thinking. But I don’t know. You know? What if… what if… You think I could be like you? I’ve thought— I thought. Kissing. Maybe. It would be good. Maybe it would be better with, with men. A man. What if I am…? You know?” 

“What if you’re gay like me? Not exactly like me. Gay in the other way.”

What if he is gay? Could he be gay if he doesn’t know what he wants? He’s not entirely sure he knows his full name right now. His head is very sloshy. His hands are tingly. He’s nice and warm though. Like when Buck holds him. He likes when Buck holds him. “Do you think… My parents think… And fuck, was that out of left field.”

She pushes his arm. “They think what about baseball?” 

He laughs and doesn’t know why. It’s all stupid. It can’t be true because wouldn’t he know? Shouldn’t he be able to tell? Maybe he just can’t say. It’s too embarrassing to say. “My dad thinks I am. He thinks I love. I’m in love. With a man. All of high school, middle school, all through that. I was scared someone might think it, scared my parents might think it. And now they think it? And they’re happy? They’re happy for me. They’re happy and they want to meet Buck.”

“Why would they want to— OH! Oh, you love Buck! You want to kiss Buck! I knew you did. Hen and Howie-Chim tried to say you didn’t. They tried to say, they spend all this time with you two, and nothing ever happens, and they know you better. They tried to say I was wrong. Although, they might have been fucking with me just because. Chimney would do that. But I’m not wrong! They were wrong. And I knew it.” She nods fervently and points to herself. 

Eddie’s heart trips and stumbles and it must be drunk, too. But Karen would know. She would have to know. Not that Eddie doesn’t know. He would kiss Buck. He loves Buck. Does that mean he’s in love with Buck? Is that one plus one is two? “You think… you think so? Is that… does that mean I’m in love with him?”

“Do you want to kiss him? Do you want to love him?” 

“Do I want to…” Is that it? Is that what it boils down to? Being in love is wanting to love him? Of course he wants to love Buck. He wants to give Buck all the love in the world because it’s been overflowing and growing and it’s too much to keep inside his chest. And Buck deserves to have every ounce of love. 

It would be good to kiss him. His lips look soft and pretty. He likes to put on this vanilla lip balm because he says it smells and tastes like cake, and then Eddie tells him not to eat his chapstick because that’s not good, and it makes Buck roll his pretty blue eyes and smile like sunshine and he’s so, so beautiful when he smiles. He’s so beautiful when he does anything. 

It’s probably stupid that Eddie ever questioned it. How could he not be in love with Buck? He does nothing but think about him and talk about him and want to be around him when they’re not around each other. And it’s nothing like how he’s always thinking of Chris and his family and friends. Buck’s always been in a different category. Maybe that’s why there has never been a word, a noun, a thing that encompasses everything they are. 

Partner has always been closest. Because it means more. It means colleague and coworker, ally and teammate, accomplice, companion, significant other, committed for life, long-term lover, other half, co-parent, and spouse. Everything and more. 

There’s too much wine in his system. Too much of something in his system. Can you drown in it? Does it make you overly intoxicated? Are you blind and stupid and obsessive and reckless? Do you forget things you should know? Do you want more than you should? Do you fly too far and feel too much? 

He feels too much. 

They’ve been doing most things together again. Like quarantine. They have dinner and breakfast together with Christopher. They went to the grocery store and bought everything together the last at least twenty-three times they had to get groceries. Buck brings over his laundry so they can wash all their clothes together and Buck doesn’t have to use the bad machines in his building or go to a laundromat for clean clothes. Buck has long legs and strong arms and he will wrap Eddie in all of them while they sleep. 

They probably shouldn’t do that many things together. This is why he feels too much. 

“It’ll stop, right?” He asks quietly. “It’ll go away? I won’t always…” 

Sorrow washes over Karen’s face. “What do you mean? Why would you want—”

The alcohol is still there, still too hot and fuzzy, but he’s suddenly a thousand times more sober. “He doesn’t. It’s not. Not mutual. It’s not… requited? I’m just, I’m his friend. We’re just. We aren’t anything else. We can’t be. But feelings don’t last. Right? I think I heard that. It won’t last?”

He doesn’t know how to make it stop because how did it even start? Maybe time is the only thing that can stop it. Eventually, Buck will find someone he does want. Buck isn’t going to be single forever. He’s kind and silly and funny and he loves kids and he wants to take care of people and help everyone. He’s always there when you need him. He protects the things that mean the most to you. He’ll dive into wreckage to pull you out. He’ll throw himself into gunfire to save you. 

He… he’s the most loving, caring, beautiful person. He’s the best partner. In every single version of the word. There’s no one Eddie would rather raise a child with. There’s no one he’d rather have a family with. There’s no one he’d rather share the rest of his life with. 

Maybe. Eddie just has to live with it. Maybe it won’t stop. He won’t always think of it. It’ll just be there, like anything else, and maybe it’ll hurt for a while. But pain isn’t forever. 

Karen takes his hand and squeezes. “I love you. Do you know that? Because I do. Hen does, too. She loves you.”

He breathes slowly and squeezes back. “I love you, too.” 

“Hey, no matter what, at least you know now. You are like me. In reverse. At least for one man. I knew you were. You have the queer vibes.”

Well. It is something. It doesn’t make everything clear, but being in love with a man at least means something. 

He’s in love. He is in love. Like his parents think. Like Karen thinks. 

This is what in love feels like. Like too much wine and not enough time and drowning and flying and crashing and wanting. 

He’s not sure he likes wanting. There’s a lot of missing, aching, lacking, and it’s too hopeless. 

Is it hopeless?

[almost-a-class-act]

If you’re still doing the headcanons, ◼️ for Winters, Speirs, Lipton, Liebgott, Shifty, Luz, Martin, Toye, Guarnere Babe, and or Roe please.

I know this is an odd selection, but I’d really like to see the differences in how they keep their rooms/living quarters from one another. Also you don’t have to do all of them if it’s too many. Do what ever makes you comfortable. Thanks.

Sorry or you're welcome in advance, this got long.

Winters – Neat and tidy, for the most part – best houseguest ever if he comes to stay; he’ll make his bed so neatly you could bounce a quarter off it – but he does have his little bubbles of chaos. His desk is scattered papers and empty mugs; he has a chest by the front door that things like winter clothes are meant to go inside of but somehow they end up piled on top. He stores pots and pans and other assorted kitchen things in the dishwasher and oven. His place is clean but lived in.

Speirs – There is shit hidden everywhere. He has a system, and it’s not for you to understand. No one is going to steal his good socks, but they’re still stashed in an inexplicable place for socks to be stashed. There are so few things left out that sometimes it feels a bit sterile.

Lipton – His place is a bit cluttered, but cozy. Crucially, he is unbothered by this clutter, up to a point. If he lives with Ron, it kind of works out because Ron can implement his system better if there are more hiding places. Lip doesn’t like an overhead light so he’s got an impressive lamp collection. Has a favourite cushion but won’t admit it. Likes a nice smell so he’s got wax melts and the odd candle, maybe flowers in the spring.

Liebgott – He’s got a chore schedule, and he sticks to it. Has made his bed every day of his life. Will make you take your damn shoes off before you come in. If he lives with Webster, it is a war of attrition when it comes to doing the laundry/folding it/putting it away in a timely fashion. Joe ends up doing his laundry and then leaving it out to make a point, but he gets sick of looking at it and ends up putting it away. Would rather fix something than toss it so he’s got secondhand furniture and the odd home reno job. The only part of Lieb’s space that is kind of a disaster is the cabinet full of hair-care products.

Shifty – Shifty’s place is a little kitschy, but like, OG kitcsh. It's all handmade quilts and knitted blankets from family members. He has a few quirky knickknacks, and never loses his scissors because he has a ceramic scissor rack that hangs on the wall (it says “I keep my scissors in this rack, if you use them put them back!”). Grandma-core. Wears his boots in the house but he’s cute so we forgive him.

Luz – Not a slob, but loves buying new stuff so his house is a little crowded. Genuinely every modern kitchen appliance is taking up space on this man’s counter. He has like, five different ways to brew coffee. Modern AU George has a juicer, a panini press, a Vitamix, a home hotpot, a waffle maker, you name it. Definitely bought an air fryer during the pandemic. Great at cooking? No, just loves gizmos. Come over, he’ll make you a passable grilled cheese.

Martin – Has a man cave (wouldn’t call it that, but that’s what it is) and loves some sports memorabilia. Doesn’t keep extra stuff around that he doesn’t have a use for – if you come over and you drink your coffee any way other than black, he definitely doesn’t have anything to put in it. You get what you get and you don’t get upset, bruh. Not Type A organized but wouldn’t live in filth; he’s a fucking grown-up.

Toye – Will do chores that have an obvious point – like washing dishes, although he’s definitely in the “let it soak” and “let it drip dry in the drain rack” camp – but you’re not gonna catch him dusting the baseboards. He likes to sleep in the absolute dark and quiet, so he’s got the heavy curtains and the bedroom door shut at night, no digital alarm clock making light, phone turned to silent. His closet is mostly shoes (90% of which are some kind of athletic shoe, but he’ll shell out money on footwear in general). He gets his breakfast set out the night before, especially if it’s modern AU Joe, because he’s gotta do fasted cardio when he gets up and he’s going to be hungry after.

Guarnere – Has kept and displayed everything he’s ever received as a gift. All of his drinking glasses are pints from his buddy who used to work in a pub. His interior décor is a throwback but the chairs are comfy as hell. Will do chores if people are coming over but generally doesn’t mind a little mess.

Babe – It’s a little chaotic in there. Did you expect anything less? Likes a cooking experiment, does not like to clean up post-cooking. Has printed out photos of his friends and family and they’re up all over the place. Has the questionably-washed ‘night cup’ next to the sink for midnight bouts of thirst. Will pack a closet full to the bursting and then act surprised when it all falls out on him the next time he opens it.

Roe – Not a lot of personal stuff lying around. He has a good number of books (most of which he hasn’t read – join the club, Doc) but the rest of his decorating comes from stuff he inherited from his grandmother or whoever he lives with. If it’s postwar Roe, he has strong memories of the flood and then the Depression, so he tends to hang onto things he might not need, just in case (think shoeboxes full of photo negatives, every possible type of screw, chipped plates).

[velvetblackness]

Ship ask thing for temily

who the fuck put the peeps in the microwave

Definitely Emily, she used to roast them over a tea light, but Reid told her that was unhealthy, so she thought she'd try another method...in her defense, she'd had a few glasses of wine

who forgot to put the cat outside before sex

It's Tara, she is still not really used to Sergio and doesn't really understand why Emily likes him so much, which is probably because Sergio is very jealous when it comes to Emily....

who posts vines of the other doing embarrassing shit

It's Tara and Emily absolutely hates it especially because there is a lot to post since she can be quite clumsy.

But what Emily hates even more is when Penelope adds funny sounds to the videos

who breaks the most phones

Emily... as we already know, she can be clumsy and by now she's running out of excuses for how she broke her phone in the field, when she actually broke it at home, especially since she's section chief now and isn't in the field as much anymore

who dies first

Emily... she just doesn't know how to take care of herself... and how to avoid dangerous situations

which one I could see as being lactose intollerant

Emily, Tara always has lactase pills with her, in case Emily forgets them.

who thinks they can do something really well even though they can’t

Tara thinks she makes the best grilled cheese sandwiches in the world and Emily always eats them, but well they're not really that good especially since she is used to JJs grilled cheese wich is in Emilys opinion the best grilled cheese in the world...she already asked JJs to inconspicuously share her recipe with Tara

who is more likely to get kicked out of the bed

Neither of them, they have an agreement that once they're in bed they can't be mad at each other or at least have to pretend they're not mad, which usually results in them actually not being mad

who uses the computer most

Tara, she likes to do research or play online games.... Emily doesn't like being on the computer in her free time. She says it reminds her too much of work.

to the ship ask

[cheese-induced-madness]

Some pre-accident Steven Boxleitner headcanons because I have Thoughts about this man.

-Look I know we all as a fandom collectively like to portray Steven as a perfect cinnamon roll all the time because it makes it more tragic, and that is valid, but it is important to my mental health to believe that he and Wordgirl used to dunk on each other all the damn time. Usually in a more lighthearted tone than we see with Two Brains, but you cannot look at me and tell me they didn’t have a cool adult older sibling-gremlin younger sibling type dynamic. Roasting each other is just part of the deal, your honor.

-In that vein he would absolutely pretend not to know about memes and the Youth Culture just for the sake of making wg cringe. He is GRATUITOUSLY misusing the word “sussy” just to watch her die inside.

-Can cook really well but in a way that would make most professional chefs hate his guts immediately if they saw this man in the kitchen. He’s committing every food crime known to man. He is eyeballing his measurements and microwaving shit that nobody else dares to microwave, yet somehow it always turns out really well. You think a man who welds a grilled cheese together fears consequences for his culinary sins? Because the answer is no. He can and will use a laser to cook a steak and there is no stopping him.

-Plays video games but gets weirdly analytical and strategic about shit that does not need that level of thought. He is making spreadsheets in excel to find the most efficient farm setup in stardew valley and actively researching the best type combinations and stat setups in pokemon before he even picks his starter. Though despite whatever he chooses as the most optimal setup, he still ends up keeping a single ratatta he catches at the start of the game one his team because he can’t bring himself to abandon him in the box.

-pretends to know shit about sports if he has to talk to The Straights about things. Very good at bullshitting his way through a conversation but if he gets called out on it he will never recover.

-Ex theater kid. One of the first shows he did was, ironically, cats. He has done his best to keep any and all video evidence completely hidden because if wg ever found it he would never hear the end of it.

-Childrens show enthusiast that will absolutely go feral over dissecting the lore, worldbuilding and the character arcs in something that is probably ultimately not meant to be that deep. [looks directly at the camera like i’m on the office]

-Has a lot of irrational fears. Clowns, puppets, old dolls, animatronics, and for some reason horses. He simply Does Not Trust Them.

-Has a habit of playing horror games or going down creepy youtube video rabbit holes really late at night and then being unable to sleep due to the very obvious and foreseeable consequences of his own actions. This does not deter him from doing it again the next night.

-Gets crushes on the villains pretty easily and always feels a little bad about it because he’s supposed to be one of the good guys and thus should not be having fantasies about being wrapped up safe in the arms of the guys he’s supposed to be helping to stop.

-I’m not saying he would make fucked up weapons with the intent to use them or cause any serious damage, but he absolutely would make something capable of mass destruction just to see if he’s capable, test it once, and then immediately disassemble it and scrap the blueprints while spending the next week or two unsettled at the knowledge of how much havoc he could cause should he choose to, even if he knows he has no desire to hurt anyone.

-Always feels a little guilty that he’s never out in the field helping wg fight villains. He says it’s because he’s not sure if he’d be much good in a fight, and she assures him it’s fine, but he knows that’s not the real reason. He doesn’t fight because he knows he’d be a little too good at it and he doesn’t trust himself not to take it too far in the heat of the moment.

-Overall gets a lot of intrusive thoughts that he finds pretty upsetting. He’s had them for awhile so he’s pretty much learned to just ignore them, but sometimes something will pop into his head that freaks him out enough that he has to just. stop what he’s doing for a minute and just sort his brain out.

-Always worried that, despite all he does to help the side of good, deep down he’s secretly a bad person at his core and always will be. When he fused with Squeaky and started his first crime spree, he had a moment of sheer panic and grief, mourning what he believed was the death of the only part of him that could be categorized as a good person, dooming him to be only the rotten core that remains. Which is part of the reason he started leaning into the theatrics of being a villain once he got used to Squeaky’s presence, even though Steven is still the one with the dominant portion of control over their body. It’s not so much that Steven changed, but moreso that his perception of himself and how he has to act did. His original amicable and caring personality is still in there and still shines through on occasion, but he’s resigned himself to putting on a front of being antagonistic and selfish because that’s what Squeaky demands and the rest of the city expects of him.

[espithewarlock]

Thank you @car-bo-hydrate for the tag! 💚

star sign: and tell you what part of the year my birthday is?? lmao.

favourite holiday: I really love Thanksgiving. Getting everyone together and cooking a big fucking tasty meal. (Well, that, and anything that gets me a day off of work)

last meal: Grilled Cheese & tomato soup! A perfect warm comfort dinner when it's cold and snowing outside.

current favourite musician: I'm currently listening to a lot of Green Day in prep for their tour. Fall Out Boy is also never a wrong answer.

last music listened to: Stay Frosty Milk Tea by Fall Out Boy

last movie watched: Godzilla Minus One - absolutely phenomenal. It felt like a good-old-fashioned Godzilla movie plus it made me care about the characters. (I heard it might be released in black & white? wouldn't it be fucking cool if it was black & white, except for Godzilla's blue energy charge?)

last tv show watched: literally can't remember. Probably something at my in-laws over Christmas. (does, like Wheel of Fortune / Jeopardy count for this?)

last book/fic finished: Under the Whispering Door by TJ Klune. Incredible book, deals with grief and what happens after death in a very hopeful way.

last book/fic abandoned: I know my prev. tagger said Catch 22 and I'll admit that I also had to set that one down a long time ago. I hit the back button on plenty of fics & I tend not to remember the names of those? (There was one that I was trying with an unusual pairing, but it had untagged yukierre in it and I just went 🤮)

currently reading: about to start one that I got for Christmas - Babel by R.F. Kuang. It was given to me by my sister-in-law and she never misses.

last thing researched for writing/art/hyperfixation: leather armor components

favourite online fandom memory: ok, so I was part of a ff.net forum back in like...2010? and a bunch of us planned to meet up at an anime convention. In hindsight, it was a stupid af thing to meet up with a bunch of internet strangers (plus my best friend who introduced me to the forum but still) but we had a TON of fun. I fell out of the fandom (college/life got in the way) unfortunately, but those memories

favourite old fandom you wish would drag you back in/have a resurgence: y'all will know as soon as I do a Code Geass rewatch because I will not talk about anything else for a bit.

favourite thing you enjoy that never had an active or big fandom, but you wish it did: If I ever run out of f1 rpf fic to read I might check in on the Code Geass fandom on AO3. It wasn't huge on the fanfic spaces back in 2010 (and the fanfic spaces were significantly less developed) so I might see what has happened since then.

tempting project you're trying to rein in/don't have time for: I have two different longfics that are occupying my brain. I'm trying to get through PWFE, finish Nymph!Pierre #3, do my editing pass on the other oneshot that's nearly done, then I can sit down and figure out which longfic I'm tackling first.

(o゜▽゜)o☆

If anyone wants to play along please feel free! Tagging @duquesademiel @your-littlesecret @chaesonghwas and @wolfiemcwolferson if you haven't already done this!