#i do agree that every actor in these looks like they wish they were 100 miles away though

[kilometeresmorales]

the decision to include jar jar binks in ALL of TPM is insane actually. like he adds nothing and is so hard to listen to. why did they do this….

also idc what anyone says, the little anakin actor did a great at job for a kid. it’s not his fault GL literally wrote the words “Yippeee!” and “Oops!” into a fucking script

[crguang]

I feel like there’s a lot of sacrificing for a joke in hsr, which is definitely annoying especially when it just…doesn’t make sense, tonally and just logically. And I really do wish we found out more abt the TB, and I would’ve like even like a tidbit from firefly since we talk to her sm, we even play as her at the end. Or maybe get an offhand mention abt how she’s not supposed to tell us bc of the script or smth . I def agree w you, I cannot take the ipc seriously, bc there’s all this stuff abt how they’re doing stuff for their own benefit and profit but idk the stuff w the stellaron hunters and them is just so goofy, like it doesn’t make any sense.

ok so, I was looking thru ur blog and I realized I sent a message abt two-ish weeks ago, tumblr probably ate it smh. I was just saying how it was silly that Kafka’s wanted poster literally says she likes coats on it, and her bounty, like that’s it. Shes so sjsjshbsbddbbewv. And I also came up with another fic idea, like Kafka in an idol/band AU, but also I think her being an actor w the other stellaron hunters would be funny. But yk if I ever get around to writing anything instead of Kafka just living in my brain, who would she be in a band with, I was think abt using some of the characters from the animated before the show starts thing, but the instruments just don’t go together. Also I think I need to work on writing Kafka in general, bc she’s so complicated and it’s fun but I also overthink things too much.

And the leaks were unfortunately right abt 4 characters on one side. I’m not as devastated as you ofc, but hopefully I win my 50/50. Hjskalskskskndn I will cry if I loose.

also, no need to apologize for ranting, your rants always make more sense than mine, and I really enjoy your thoughts. -🌠

i agree with you 100%!!! missed opportunity with firefly and the tb reconnecting it could have been so nice. and omg i think i read that ask, it sounds familiar but i have so many (most are really old reqs, the recent ones are the event reqs i keep to answer eventually) and sometimes things get lost or i’ll click on the notification, answer in my head, then go do something else and forget to actually post my reply, im sorry😭😭 but YES i was thinking of kafka’s description in the game and while i know its the objective writing of the game and not the ipc, i find it funny to believe that whoever was in charge of her wanted notice thought she was hot as fuck because “dashing” and “beauty” in the same sentence is crazy work. her bounty is even funnier bc im wondering how they found out that she loved coats like😭 did she steal a bunch (she did), are they rlly monitoring her credit card and seeing all the purchases of expensive coats, is she always found in a store— what is it?!

actor au stellaron hunters would be really fun… you could also just put then in a band together for the idol/band au because i do think they’re the people who understand her best. the thought of kafka and jingliu practicing together is so funny because jingliu would hate that woman like GDJFBFNG her arrogance would have liu clenching that instrument so tight

i dont think you should worry about overthinking when it comes to writing, it can be a weakness because then you focus too much on details and forget the big picture, but personally i also think j too much into things when i write characters like kafka especially. when every genuine emotion is in the twitch of a finger, there’s kinda no choice lol

“im not as devastated as you” is killing me but its true… im the biggest victim of this banner system bc if i dont get my swanie i’ll @)&$(&)@)£<£#%. i hope u win the 50/50, unless i lose mine in which case i hope everyone else also loses <3

[caatws]

I am the same Anon who wrote the death of an author comment. I am not saying that disliking Gamora's treatment is wrong, I very much agree that she hasnt been used to her full potential, and I agree this does affect people who see themselves in Gamora and the other characters. What I am saying is that, especially since Gunn is not working at Marvel again, we shouldnt take every single thing he says as a fact, especially if he didnt write it in the script, which something thats stands on its own without his commentary or tweets, Marvel owns the script...nothing else. Whether he thinks Gamora and Peter belong together or not, we shouldnt take that as a Marvel is never gonna get them together again and is 100% definite just because HE thinks so. I am not gonna get into the debate on if he means at this very moment or permanently, but Marvel can very much do whatever they want as long as it doesnt contradict what is being settled in stone in previous movies/tv shows, and nothing said in the movie nor written in the script works in against any of the ideas on whether she can be close to the guardians nor Peter again. If a director/writer wants to bring them back together and both Zoe and Chris are willing to return then it can happen because its not settled by a word in the writing that "they are never meant to be together", that is just Gunn's interpretation and, again, Marvel can very much go against that statement in the future if they wish to do so. This doesnt just apply to the romance part but also to the how she feels towards the guardians and ravagers as a whole. While it is obvious that she sees the ravagers as a family maybe one day it is stated that she sees guardians as an equal family of some sort, as an example. My point is that everybody is focusing a bit too much on what Gunn thinks/says in respect to the characters and the movie when he is not in charge anymore and Marvel couldnt give a shit on what he thinks outside of the movie itself.

but i've Been saying this is his personal interpretation of his open ending this whole time tho, not that gunn had any say in or control over the future of canon 😭 like i've literally been saying "this seems to be gunn's intention/interpretation and i disagree with it". where in that is me treating his word as canon 😭😭😭

further, if you read thru some of my older asks on this whole topic, i've also been saying (for weeks bc ppl seem to keep forgetting!!!) that i don't even think there's a future to even debate over bc the gotg are literally done. like contracts are up ppl are moving on like WE HAVE KNOWNNNN FOR YEARSSSSS that vol 3 was the end. like idk where y'all were during the vol 2/iw era of gotg fandom, but i remember talking abt the fact that vol 3 was gonna be the end all the way back then. WHY ARE WE STILL STUCK ON THIS 😭

just bc actors are "open to being asked back" doesn't mean it's gonna happen (and again they'll have to get in line cuz...just look at allllllllll the characters from phase 4 and onward who have yet to even cross over once yet), so i'm not commenting on the treatment of gamora or starmora etc as something that could or couldn't even change in the future bc personally, i don't even expect to see a future project with this particular gotg lineup in general, regardless, so literally none of my opinions on gunn's commentary are weighing his words as heavily as a decider of future canon. bc there is no future canon for him or anyone to decide for most of the characters. bc gotg is done lol

[handsomelyhiddleston]

Sticky Notes - Tom Hiddleston x Reader

It all started on the set of Ragnarok. They hadn’t even started filming yet. Table reads, choreography, costume fittings, set development…The cast, crew, and even Taika started finding little notes.

Some were specifically to certain people…

“Your laugh is contagious. Thank you for making this set so down to earth and inviting.” You slipped that into Taika’s (the director’s) fanny pack when he left it on his director’s chair.

“I know how hard you’ve been working on your fight choreography, and I just wanted to let you know you absolutely killed it today!” You left that stuck to Tessa’s (Valkyrie’s) water bottle.  

Some you posted for everyone, like “I know that you all put such amazing effort and time into bringing this movie to life and I just want you all to know that it doesn’t go unnoticed.” That note was posted above a table full of ‘easy to grab’ snacks you laid out such as protein bars, fruit snacks, pretzels, and dried fruit.

This continued well into filming. Everyone had tried to figure out who was leaving these little daily encouragements. It got to the point that Taika started calling you Casper, as in “Casper the Friendly Ghost.” Every day at the start of filming he would say. “Come on guys. Let’s make Casper proud.”

Everyone had a theory. Most thought that it was actually Taika just trying to keep morale up. Taika accused Tom but took it back after some comment about the notes not sounding very British.

Your job on set was to cast extras. While you were present daily, you honestly only had to meet with Taika once or twice a day to make sure the next day’s cast extras were ready. You two fell into an easy rhythm working together and he started asking for your opinion on some other aspects of the set. One late afternoon, after an incredibly chaotic day of filming, Taika decided that he was going to scrap the entire scene and start it over.

He pulled out his phone and sent a text to you, Tom, and Chris. “Today can suck it. I’ve just watched the dailies, and something just isn’t right about that scene. Meet at mine in 30 so we can get ahead of it.” A few seconds later he added, “And for the love of God, someone bring some tequila.”

You laughed at his text, jogging to the trailer you shared with the other casting director. You changed into a pair of shorts and a baggy t-shirt and grabbed your keys and wallet. You jumped in your car so you could make a quick trip to the Starbucks down the street since it appeared it was going to be a long night.

“One Venti iced coffee with milk and 1 sugar, one Grande Americano hot with cream and 2 sugars, one Venti hot latte with vanilla, and one Venti hot water with two earl gray tea bags and four sugars on the side. Can I also get one of the small kid’s milk boxes?” You heard the barista repeat your order back and pulled forward and paid.

When you got to Taika’s trailer, Tom and Chris were already there.

“Oh, bless you” Taika thanked you, taking the Latte from you.

“You’re the best” Chris said, taking the lid off of the Americano so it would cool off a bit.  

“Tom, I grabbed you tea.” You handed him the hot water and two tea bags, setting the sugars and milk next to him so he could make it to his liking.

“You’re too kind” Tom graciously took the hot water from you, noting that you grabbed his favorite kind of tea.

In Taika’s trailer there was a table with a bench on each side. Chris and Tom were sat on one side, leaving a space for you to sit next to Taika.

“Anyone grab the tequila?” you laughed, dropping your keys and wallet on Taika’s counter and sitting at the table with your iced coffee.

Taika grabbed the bottle and sat it down in front of you. “You’re already two swigs behind, love.”

“Bullshit” you laughed. “Prove it. Where are the shot glasses?”

“I said swigs, not shots” Taika smirked. “We don’t have shot glasses.”

“Look at how much is missing from that bottle. I just bought it.” Hemsworth backed Taika up.

You looked at Tom, knowing he would be honest with you.

“Hey, you trust Tom more than me?” Taika pretended to be offended.

“Tom always looks out for everybody. I don’t think he’d let me get two shots drunker than you fools.” You teased Taika, poking his side and sticking your tongue out at him.

“Watch” Taika said, putting his arm around your shoulders and looking towards Tom. “How many swigs did we all take?”

Tom laughed, “I’m sorry darling, but he’s telling you the truth.”  

“Fine, fine.” You opened the bottle and took three swigs, handing it to Taika. “Catch up, then.”

Tom started thinking about the compliment you had given him as he took his third swig of Tequila. He felt flattered that you felt that way, but it also reminded him of one of the notes he had found stuck to his trailer door.

“Okay, we need to re-block this whole scene. It just did not translate from script to screen…” The four of you worked on a few line changes and mapped out a better way to execute the scene for over two hours.

There was a bit of dialogue that Taika felt was getting lost that he really just didn’t want to let go of. “We may just have to mess with this tomorrow while we’re filming.”

“Or you could have Loki say it instead of Thor.” You suggested.

“Could do.” You could tell that Taika was thinking it over.

“Here you have Thor immediately going into another hard-hitting line” you explained. “If that line comes from Loki, it makes it less likely to get lost.”

“I think that will fix this problem too” Chris started underlining other parts of the dialogue.

“What do you think?” Taika looked at Tom.

“I mean, I personally think Loki has already evolved enough at that point in the script that it suits him quite nicely.” Tom explained in a way only Tom can explain.

“I agree” you said. “You guys make Loki grow quite a bit in this film and as usual, Tom is hitting it out of the park. I’m 100% confident he will have conveyed that message to the audience by this point.”

“Thank you for your vote of confidence.” Again, Tom was flattered. However, he was growing more and more suspicious that you were Casper.

“Always” you replied, smiling at Tom as you finished your coffee.

“Let me type this up and we can table read it.” Taika grabbed the papers and went to the other side of the trailer where his computer was set up.

“While you do that, I’m going to steal your restroom for a moment.” Chris stood, throwing his empty coffee cup away and closing the bathroom door. Chris joined Taika a moment later.

“Y/n?” Tom said, kind of quietly.

“What’s up?” Your elbows were resting on the table with your chin sat on your hands.

“Can I ask you something?” Tom didn’t want to bring it up in front of anyone. He didn’t want the notes to stop, but he had to know.

Tom looked a bit serious, but you didn’t know why. “Of course.”

“Are you…” He stopped, reaching his hand into his back pocket to retrieve his wallet. “Is this you?”

Your eyes went wide as Tom pulled a small stack of pink sticky notes out of his wallet, laying them down next to each other. There must have been 10 of them in total. You were touched that he actually kept them. Sometimes you felt silly leaving them for people not knowing if they appreciated them. You tried to play it off, laughing. “I thought those were from Taika?”

He pointed at one of them, reading it quietly. “I tried the tea you always drink. I don’t think it could ever replace my love of coffee, but I wanted you to know it pairs well with a good book.” He pointed to another note. “I know you paid for everyone to Uber home after our last night out. I just wanted to tell you I appreciate you. Thank you for always looking out for us.” You could feel his eyes on you as he moved his hand to a third note. “I envy your ability to capture a room. You’ve got an amazing knack for making those watching you feel whatever emotion you’re trying to convey.” When Tom’s hand moved to the fourth note, you heard Taika’s printer turn on.

“Put them away” you said, trying to stack them quickly. Chris started walking towards you and you grabbed the small stack you had gathered and put them in your pocket.

Tom put the rest back in his wallet. “What do you think?” he asked Taika about the changes he had made.

“I think tomorrow is going to be a lot fuckin’ better.” He passed the printed copies around after joining the two of you back at the table.

Tom’s line went over great, and the dialogue flowed much more smoothly. All of the other changes made the scene feel more natural. When Taika called it a night, Chris laid down on the couch refusing to go back to his own trailer.

“Can I walk you to yours?” Tom asked as you stepped out of Taika’s trailer.

The two of you walked back to your trailer in comfortable silence, tired and a little drunk. When you got to the door, you turned around and pulled the pink notes out of your pocket.

“Please don’t tell anyone?” You placed the notes in Tom’s hand.

“I didn’t plan on it” he replied, tucking them neatly back into his wallet.

“I feel silly now that someone knows it was me. Why did you keep them?” You had to ask. You assumed, at most, that people read them, smiled, and threw them away.

“Hmm…” Tom laughed humorlessly, his eyes focused on his wallet. “I think you’re doing a lot more than you realize when you leave your ‘silly’ little notes.”

His response caught you off guard. He almost sounded…sad? Serious?

“Y/n, I’ve had to work with actors and crew that have made filming a project miserable. Whether they were rude or critical or just an absolute diva, there is always someone to bring the room down.” He put his wallet away and looked you in the eyes. “I wish you knew how many of us have kept these notes. Taika has them in the glovebox of his car. The catwalk above the set is covered in notes you’ve left the crew. They’re stuck all over the mirrors in the make-up trailer so that the cast sees them first thing in the morning.”

Your eyes went wide. “What?”

Tom put his hands on each of your arms as if to ensure you were paying attention. “An encouraging word or a genuine compliment can change someone’s entire day, y/n. You have no way of knowing what life has dealt any of these people. They could be depressed or stressed out or wishing they hadn’t woken up that morning…and all of a sudden they receive a tiny bit of kindness from someone and it makes it that much easier to get through another day. Maybe even with a smile on their face.”

Tom wore a soft smile and even though you felt a bit overwhelmed, you couldn’t help but smile back. “Thank you for telling me that.” You moved towards him, pulling him into a tight hug.

“Please don’t forget it.” Tom pulled back a bit and pressed a quick kiss to your cheek. “I hope you get a good night’s sleep.”

“You, too.” You watched Tom walk away before slipping into your shared trailer.

Over the next few weeks, Tom had left you multiple green sticky notes with compliments written on them.

“You looked stunning yesterday”

“Thank you for still being a good listener when I go on rants about things you couldn’t care less about”

“Taika was bragging about you to someone on the phone. I just wanted you to know. I know sometimes you hesitate to suggest your ideas, but you shouldn’t.”

“I appreciate how much time you spend making this a better set to work on.”

“You are an incredible friend.”

You’d find at least one note a day and for every note he left you, you’d leave one for him. The two of you got quite a bit closer after he found out about your secret. You’d spend breaks on set together and often times wound up back in Taika’s trailer with him and Chris. You cuddled and flirted and shared more than a few loving glances, but you never went any further. It felt like it was turning into something more, but Tom was such a gentleman you couldn’t tell.

The note you found this morning, however, completely caught you off guard. The filming was almost done and everyone’s time on set was almost over. You had just sat down next to the director’s chair and opened your laptop. There, stuck to the screen, was a green sticky note. “Darling, would you please be mine?”

You looked up at Tom on stage only to find him already looking at you. He lifted his brow and tilted his head, waiting for your response. You couldn’t help but smile as you nodded ‘yes’.

Taika looked between you, noticing the interaction and intentionally teasing you. “Oi, what’s this then?”

Tom turned, trying to hide his grin by talking to Chris. You closed your laptop to hide the sticky note.

“Nah, I saw you two. Don’t pretend like I’m crazy.” Taika was still looking back and forth between you and Tom.

“Maybe you’re still drunk from last night” you teased, putting your laptop in its bag so you could retrieve the note later.

“Oh, sure.” He dropped it, knowing he’d bring it up tonight when you all gathered in his trailer.

The rest of the filming flew by crazy fast. You and Tom had decided that you would go stay with him in New York until the press junkets and interviews started. When the premier rolled around, you two were already publicly dating so you got to escort him down the red carpet. It had been just over a year since the two of you had started dating.

As the credits for the film started rolling, you felt like you were walking down memory lane. So many people go into making movies of this scale and watching all of the names roll by, one by one, really puts that into perspective. You’d met almost all of these people and worked closely with quite a few of them. As the credits came to an end, you saw that Taika had added an extra credit.

The last few “SPECIAL THANKS” credits were in order as listed…

“The filmmakers acknowledge the assistance of the New Zealand Government’s Screen Production Grant”

“The filmmakers would like to acknowledge the Yugambeh and Bundjalung Peoples of Australia”

“The director would like to thank ‘Casper’, Ragnarok’s own personal friendly ghost”

It had been a year since you’d written one of those notes and it caught you off guard. Tom put his arm around your shoulders, pressing a kiss to your temple. “I told you.”

You and Tom mingled amongst your friends at the after party. Taika was flying. He was so happy with how it turned out and grateful for such a positive response. Everyone in the cast was telling stories from filming and catching up with their friends. By the time you two got back to your hotel room, you were blissfully tipsy and exhausted. You slipped out of your dress and threw on a baggy t-shirt before washing your face and getting ready for bed. When you left the bathroom, you saw Tom sitting on the edge of the bed in his pajamas with a soft, warm smile gracing his beautiful face. He was wearing his glasses and his hair was a mess and he could not have been more attractive if he tried.

“How are you feeling?” he asked, pulling you to stand between his legs.

“Pretty good. How about yourself?” you put your arms around his neck and pressed your lips to his.

“I think there’s only one thing that could make me happier in this moment.” He answered.

You thought he was being a bit cheeky, so you replied with, “oh, yeah? I wonder what that could be.”

Tom reached behind him on the bed and pulled out a small box with a worn, green sticky note on top of it. He didn’t say anything, letting you read it. It was the same note he had left stuck to your laptop screen. “Darling, would you please be mine?” Only now the word “forever” was written at the bottom.

[morganupstead]



I don’t know if you answer these or read them but am I opinion this is the worst season premiere that they have ever had this also set up for me not watching after J leaves because I know that after that it’s going to be a absolute shit show. It already started off as a shit show this season but the rest I think it might happen. It’s just going to get 10 times worse but I cried, literally a full after Hour after the episode because of how out of character their writing jay like those last five minutes is what I started crying they’re ruining my comfort character my comfort character since I was 14 my comfort character since 2014 and it’s really killing me and it’s making me angry and it’s just not right I think as fans we deserve a lot better than that and I think the actors also deserve a lot better than that the exits going to suck. I think it’s going to be very out of character. I truly hate it here right now.🥺🥺

Anon I do read these, I don't get very many at all but every once and a while I get one and I'm glad that you sent one.

Everything you said is valid and I'm feeling it too. Personally, I thought Fire and Med ( i missed some of Med but from what I saw) were very comparable premieres to what they have been like in the past. I enjoyed Fire so much more than I had expected and I'm really grateful for that.

PD was disappointing in about 100 ways. Voight hasn't changed, and his behavior has always not sat well for me but damn that episode alone was just not okay. Is Voight currently grieving: yes but it's not an excuse to throw his baggage all over Hailey like his personal coat hanger. (it's only an explanation if anything) There were several moments where the way Voight spoke to Hailey was inexcusable to me. In the moments where Hailey did stand her ground, I was really proud of her because it's taken everything that happened to her last season to be strong enough to be brave and speak her truth. Trauma manifests differently in everyone and to see that spark back in her was great.

Now onto the Elephant on my chest and yours. I can't decide at the moment If I think Jay in that entire episode was out of character or if we are truly seeing the manifestation of what working for Voight for this long has truly done to him. I do agree that this does feel like they are ruining my comfort character in ways I always dreaded so truly I feel for you there. He didn't do a lot of talking so it was really hard to get a read on him, his face looked really blank a lot, and then the last 5 minutes still have me confused as hell. We went from Jay punching him in 9x09 to Voight literally saying "do what you want" and Jay following him.

Right now if I had to have a theory it would be this: I think Jay feels a responsibility to Hailey and to the entire unit to keep them together. I don't have a full complete thought on this yet but right after they came back from the ceremony that scene in the bullpen had a certain vibe I'm still trying to flesh out. We know he thinks that Voight will destroy himself and the unit without someone to pull him back and I think he's taken that responsibility entirely on his own for the rest of the unit's sake. And I think we really are seeing Voight change him, and I hate it because that part feels unlike Jay Halstead, but protecting the people he loves is his character.

I do agree Anon that this is hard to watch unfold, I started watching this show when I was 16 and I care about all of these actors and they deserve the world and more. I WISH we knew more right now because knowledge is power, so process this however you see fit. The best thing we can hope and rally for at this point is that this has an open door associated because THAT is what Jesse deserves above all else is the door open to this family again no matter what happens.

[waitimcomingtoo]

Tis the Damn Season

Pairing: Tom Holland x reader

Based off Tis The Damn Season

Masterlist

It was his jacket.

It was 100% his jacket, the red plaid one he only wore for the holidays.

And there it was, that stupid red jacket, standing in front of the tea section of your local grocery store.

He used to drape that jacket over your shoulders when you got cold on dates. Now, you wore a coat he had never seen before and you had no idea who’s shoulders had taken your please.

It had to be him. It just had to be your ex boyfriend in the one grocery store in town on the very day you decided to run some errands.

He just had to be there.

You immediately turned around, hoping to avoid a reunion with who that jacket belonged to. You looked over your shoulder at him and accidentally made eye contact, making you whip around and flush. You cursed yourself as you heard Tom approaching you, wishing you could disappear into this air.

“Y/n?” His voice sounded behind you. “Is that you?”

“Tom!” You pretended to see him for the first time as you turned around. He looked different, but after all, it had been four years since you’d seen him. Just from the look of him, you could tell there was an ache in him put there by the ache in you. But despite the ache, he pulled you into a hug.

“Hey.” He sighed as he rubbed your back. “It’s been a long time.”

“I know. I haven’t seen you since high school.” You chuckled nervously as you pulled away.

“Wow.” Tom was taken aback. “Has it really been that long?”

“Yeah.” You told him. “The night of our graduation was the last time I ever saw you.”

“Right.” Tom smiled sadly. “You just graduated college right? In June?”

“Yeah.” You nodded, feeling the tension between you. “How’d you know about that?”

“Your mum and I kept in touch.” He admitted. “She sent me pictures. Congratulations, by the way.”

“Oh, thanks.” You laughed awkwardly. “I’m gonna have to talk to her about sending pictures to my high school boyfriend.”

“Yeah.” He laughed as well, before clearing his throat. “You know, I looked for you every time I came home for the holidays. All fours years of college.”

“I know. And I made sure you never found me.” You forced a smile, an uncomfortable silence settling between you avoided eye contact.

“Y/n, I’m so sorry about that night. Graduation night, I mean.” Tom said suddenly. “I didn’t know you were gonna react like that.”

“You didn’t know I was gonna be upset when you waited to tell me you were leaving town to pursue acting until the week before you were leaving?” You cocked your head but kept a smile on your face so you wouldn’t seem reproachful.

“I didn’t know you were gonna break up with me and stop speaking to me.” He corrected you, also keeping a slight smile on his face.

“I was mad at you.” You admitted. “I was mad you waited so long to tell me.”

“Are you still mad?” He teased, making you chuckle. “Am I the subject of a bunch of break up songs I don’t know about?”

“No.” You smiled coyly. “I stopped being mad by the time school started up again. Then I just missed you.”

“You did? I missed you too.” Toms eyes softened. “I called you all summer. You never picked up.”

“Like I said, I was mad.” Your lips tightened into a line as you looked around awkwardly.

“Yeah.” Tom laughed sadly and looked down. “You broke my heart.”

“You broke mine first.” You countered. “So I guess we broke each other’s.”

Tom looked at you for a moment before shrugging, seemingly making a decision.

“We could call it even.” He suggested. “We could put all of that behind us and just enjoy each other’s company while we’re here.”

“You wanna do that?” You raised an eyebrow. “You want to wipe the slate clean?”

“If it’s okay with you, it’s okay with me.” Tom nodded, making you smile. You had to admit, you missed him terribly. The past was far behind you now and you saw no reason to cling to it.

“All right.” You decided. “I’m staying at my parents house. You should come by sometime.”

“I will. I miss them. I miss adults.” Tom shook his head. “The people in LA are so boring. Actors, especially.”

“Actors, huh?” You snorted. “If I wanted to know who you were hanging with while I was gone, I would've asked you.”

“I wasn’t trying to be boastful.” Tom rolled his eyes playfully. “I was just saying.”

“I’m only teasing you.” You assured him. “I had to make sure the stardom didn’t go to your head.”

“I promise you, it didn’t. I’m still the guy who took you to prom and tripped over your dress.” He reminded you of the simpler times, making you smile.

“What are you doing today?” You asked suddenly, not wanting the reunion to end.

“Nothing. Why?”

“I’m parked over by the Methodist and the high school.” You jerked your head in that direction. “We could just ride around, if you want.”

“Do you still drive that big red truck?” Tom smiled like a child.

“I do indeed.” You nodded.

“Then yeah.” He chuckled. “Let’s go.”

You paid for your groceries and led Tom back to your truck, easily spotting it’s bright red color in the falling snow.

“It’ll be so weird to be back by the school.” Tom shuddered as he looked back at your old high school. “I never wanted to come back here after we graduated.”

“I know.” You agreed. “But the memories aren’t all bad. We kissed for the first time under those bleachers, if I remember correctly.”

“I remember it too.” Tom smiled sheepishly as he went around to the passenger side. “Didn’t you just get here? How did you get this much mud on your tires?”

“We were in Drivers Ed together.” You reminded him. “You know exactly how my tires got muddy.”

“Right.” Tom laughed as he buckled up. “I believe Mr. Zion called you a pleasure to have in class but reckless behind the wheel.”

“You know me, baby. Always taking the road less traveled.”

“Yeah well, that road was apparently full of mud.” Tom said sarcastically as he got in.

You laughed and started up the car, the cold fogging up your windshield, making you reach for the heat. Tom had the same idea, and your hands touched accidentally. You both smiled as you withdrew them, blushing as you turned away.

“Sorry.” You said as you reached for the heat again, an embarrassed smile still on your face.

“It’s okay.” Tom nodded. “I’ve missed your smile.”

“I’m only smiling because I’m in my old car with my high school boyfriend and I’m internally panicking.” You admitted as you began to drive.

“Why are you panicking?” He asked. “We’ve known each other our whole lives.”

“Your life is in LA now.” You shrugged as you kept your eyes ahead. “You don’t know me anymore.”

“I want to.” Tom confessed. “I hated that we fell out of touch. I didn’t know giving this small town meant I had to give up you.”

“Tom, I told you. I’m not mad at you anymore.” You assured him. “And honestly, I don’t even blame you for leaving. We weren’t meant for a life in a small town. As soon as I could, I escaped it too. You just escaped first.”

“I think about that night a lot.” Tom admitted. “You were so excited to graduate. I had to go and ruin it by telling you I was leaving.”

“You were never great with timing.” You laughed softly. “You literally asked me to be your girlfriend right after I told you my cat died.”

Tom laughed as well, but when you looked at his face in the rear view mirror, he still looked upset.

“I’m surprised you even remember that night.” You kept talking to fill the silence. “I thought all the premiers and movie scripts would have replaced any memories of me.”

“Of course I remember you, darling.” He said certainly. “I remember every thing. All the kisses and dates and fights. I even remember your stupid cat.”

“He never liked you.” You laughed as you turned the corner.

“I know.” Tom rolled his eyes. He quieted down after a moment and returned his gaze to the window.

“God, that feels like so long ago.” You sighed with nostalgia. “What else do you remember about this place?”

“I remember your face when I told you I was leaving.” He said quietly, making you look at him briefly. “I remember how your makeup running down your face. And then I remember you watching me leave. I blocked everything else out.”

Upon hearing Toms words and the strain in his voice, you pulled your car over and looked at him.

“Look, you left. It sucked and it broke my heart but it happened. But you know what? It happened four years ago. I’m over it. So all this guilt you’re feeling is unwarranted. We said we were going to call it even, didn’t we?”

“Yeah. We did.” He nodded but his guilt didn’t let up.

“So stop with the pouting and the guilty eyes and the apologies. I forgave you four years ago.” You laughed, and he finally smiled. “You don’t need to apologize.”

“Well, it is the season for forgiveness.” He said sheepishly as his smile widened.

“There you go.” You cupped his chin. “I’ve missed your smile too, you know. And it’s tis the season. It sounds more festive that way.”

“Fine. Tis the season.” He obliged.

“Tis the damn season, indeed.” You nodded curtly. “Plus, this will be our first holiday together since high school. We should be focusing on that. The past doesn’t matter anymore.”

“Do you ever think about what would have happened to us if I stayed?” Tom asked as he kept his eyes on the falling snow. “Or how different our lives would be now if we went down the same path all those years ago?”

“Of course I do.” You said softly. “I thought about you all the time in college. I wondered what it would be like if I had taken your road instead of driving off on my own.”

“I thought about you too.” A sad look set into Toms eyes. “Honestly, darling, I never stopped loving you. Not even for a day.”

“I didn’t know that.” You bit the inside of your cheek. “I didn’t stop either.”

“You know what else?” Tom swallowed as he stared at you. “I think the road not taken looks real good now.”

“Oh yeah?” You raised an eyebrow and leaned across the transmission. “And where does that road lead?”

“To you.” He smiled coyly. “It always leads to you and my hometown.”

“How long are you in town?” You spoke softly as you pulled him closer by the jacket of his collar.

“I’m here until Monday.” He told you as your noses brushed. “Why?”

“I’m staying at my parents house.” You reminded him. “You should stay there too.”

“Yeah?” He tilted his head. “And do what?”

“You could call me “babe” for the weekend.” You shrugged, lips grazing his. “Or anything else you’d like. I believe “darling” was a favorite of yours.”

“You’d want to do that? Even though I’m leaving?” His eyes darkened.

“Why not? I’ll be yours for the weekend. No strings attached.” You told him before connecting your lips to his. Tom kissed you back, putting his palm on your cheek to keep you close. It was your first kiss since high school, and it felt exactly how you remembered. Tom pulled away to catch his breath and rested his forehead against yours.

“So.” His lips twitched into a smile. “When does that weekend start?”

Time flew and Monday came all too quickly. You and Tom spent the weekend making up for the four years you’d been apart. On the day of his fight, you slept in half the day for old times sake. The sunlight hit you, waking you up and malign you curse your teenage self for not putting up thicker curtains. Tom rolling over beside you startled you but his warm hand on your hip calmed you down.

“Morning, babe.” His voice was husky from just waking.

“Good morning.” You rolled over so you were facing him. “Did you sleep okay?”

“Surprisingly yes, considering we’re two adults sharing your twin sized bed.” Tom chuckled sleepily.

“Must’ve been the company.” You shrugged coyly.

“Must be.” Tom grinned before leaning in to kiss you. You kissed him back before nuzzling into the crook of his neck.

“This is how the past four years should have been. I should have been waking up next to you every morning.” Tom sighed as he rubbed your back.

“I know.” You responded before letting a silence settle in. You both knew the weekend was over, and neither of you wanted it to end.

“We should get up.” You said reluctantly. “Your flight is soon.”

“Yeah.” Tom sighed and untangled himself from you. He got out of bed and pulled his shirt on that had been discarded somewhere on the floor. You found your pajama shirt at the edge of the bed and pulled it on, the cold material sending a chill down your spine. You solemnly watched Tom get dressed, noticing how he kept his back to you. He did this to hide his despair as he got ready to leave the warmest bed he’d ever known.

“Tom?” You asked, making him turn around almost immediately.

“Yes?” He asked, hopeful eyes on you.

“Nothing.” You lost your nerve and sat back into the bed. “Never mind.”

“I don’t have to go yet.” He said quickly. “I could stay a few more days.”

“Why?” You asked sadly. “So I can wait around while you decide if this is worth it or not?”

“Well I won’t ask you to wait if you don’t ask me to stay.” Tom answered. “Because I would. If you asked me to, I would stay.”

“What about your life back in LA?” You asked as you got off the bed. “What about your career?”

“I don’t know.” Tom shrugged. “Suddenly that doesn’t matter to me anymore. The last time I left you, all I could think about was making it big. Now all I think about is you.”

You didn’t answer and pulled a sweater over your head, rubbing your arms to assuage you from the chill.

“I messed up last time.” Tom continued. “I never should have left you. Or I should have at least taken you with me.”

“We could have figured something out.” You finally spoke. “I could have looked at schools in LA. You just didn’t give me any time to prepare. Why did you wait so long to tell me?”

“I was so scared that you wouldn’t want to come with me that I just kept putting it off until you couldn’t come anymore.” Tom admitted, tears coming to his eyes as he relived the break up.

“It felt like you were leaving me behind.” You relived it too. “I thought you were running away from me.”

“Darling, I would never run from you.” He promised as he came to your side and put his hands on your face. “Only towards or beside you.”

“You were right.” You pulled your bottom lip between your teeth as you touched his face. “The road not taken looks real good now.”

“We could make this more than a just a weekend.” He mumbled as his thumb grazed your bottom lip. “I’ll stay here or you could come back with me.”

You let your eyes flutter shut before he pulled you into a kiss, one different from the ones shared the night before. You felt your emotions bubble to the surface and pulled away to rest your forehead on his chest.

“Tom, it’s not realistic.” You sniffled. “It worked for the weekend but it wouldn’t work long term. You know that.”

“Just hear me out.” Tom protested as you pulled away.

“We didn’t work when we were kids. What makes you think we’d work now?”

“We’re different now.” He pleaded. “I’m different now.”

“So what, you think I’m just gonna upend my life to follow you? Or you’re just gonna give up yours to stay with me?” You asked. “Are you even thinking at all?”

“I think you’re the only soul who can tell which smiles I’m faking.” Tom said solemnly. “And I think I’m a damn fool if I let you slip away again.”

You sucked in a sharp breath and cradled yourself as you turned away from him, unable to look at him without caving to his request. Tom slowly came up behind you and rested a hand on your shoulder, gently moving the hair that had been resting there.

“I also think that if a part of you didn’t want this too, you would have left a long time ago.” He whispered, sending shivers down your spine.

“You didn’t want this, remember?” You asked bitterly as you whipped around. “You didn’t want the small town life and the picket fence. You wanted bright lights and Hollywood and that’s what you got. That’s what’s waiting for you in LA.”

“Whats waiting for me in LA are fake friends who hang on the edges of their seats to see if I make it or fail. I saw the bright lights and I don’t want it anymore.”

“Then what do you want?” You asked desperately.

“You.” He said simply. “And if you say no, I’ll know that this time, the only heart I’m breaking is my own.”

You chewed your bottom lip as you stared at him, your whole life looking back at you.

“So, what do you say?” He whispered, desperation heavy in his voice. You rested your hands on his chest and gave him a gentle nod, telling him everything he needed to know.

“You said it yourself.” You smiled softly. “Tis the damn season.”

Tag List 🏷

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[cornflowershade]

I’m gonna attempt to be as articulate here as possible, though I have a lot of varying thoughts—so bear with me. :) Either way, in light of all the recent SPN *d r a m a* I just wanted to share a couple notes that I feel are important for us to keep in mind. Whether you feel yourself agreeing or not, I do hope you’ll at least give this a read through and some genuine consideration. I’m talking about this because I feel we’re at a point where the ‘Destiel + actors’ situation could get much worse, not better for the fans, if handled without due nuance.

Getting right to it, it’s extremely important that anger be directed in the right places, and be directed with defined/achievable goals (not just being hateful). I say this because, blaming someone who didn’t mean any harm will only cause them to close up more. There’s a line between someone who thinks ill of you, and someone who disagrees with you, and although it can be difficult to lay off the latter—especially when we’ve been through so much—that’s a line that’s important to observe. We should be mad about homophobia. 100%. What we should not be, however, is mad that someone doesn’t agree with us the way we want, or ship something as hard as we want, or interpret characters in the exact way we wish they did. Yes, I’m talking about the difference between Jared and Jensen at the recent con. 

A lot of people wanted a more straightforward response from Jensen, less ‘this love is so beautiful and complete and angelic that it’s beyond comprehension’ (which is what he essential said. I think it’s actually a fairly sweet sentiment, especially considering that Jensen has always seemed to headcanon angels as having emotions that are above human comprehension, and considering that Cas is in fact an angel who perceives and feels so much more that humans likely can, and considering that this is not a new thought process that he just made up in order to respond about Destiel, rather a framework he was answering from) and more ‘this love is gay.’ / But here’s the thing... whereas Jared was so obviously talking from a place of not giving a sh*t about Destiel (either out of the need to be homophobic, or out of spite for Jensen, or just in order to suck up to his bosses idk) Jensen was not. Jensen cares about the characters. Just look at the transcript of him in the autograph line, literally ducking his head and smiling, agreeing sweetly that “yeah,” Dean & Cas are the only “Dean & Cas in all the universes.” This is not the agreeing response of a man who hates our ship. Does he talk about it or interpret it the way all of us want him to? Maybe not. But he doesn’t hate our ship. On stage, however, he was stuck in a very no-win situation the second Jared started his big speech. What he did in that circumstance was pull the conversation to a slightly better place, following an absolute train wreck. Now, did he speak up and say “okay Jared you’re wrong”? No. But we know they weren’t getting along at the con. We know they were overheard in a ‘heated argument’. We know they’re having a rough patch. And Jensen is well aware that we know. The Internet was blowing up just recently about a J2 Fallout, and guess what? He’s probably not allowed to let whatever fallout or argument they’re going through show on stage. Because where the fans are concerned, he needs to project the “we are brothers in real life” idea. He’s not gonna confront Jared or strongly oppose him on stage in front to the fans. Especially considering the weirdly positive response Jared’s rant was getting from the audience. Which is the other thing... the audience didn’t seem upset. Should they have been miffed? Personally, I think so, yeah. Did they seem to be? No. So Jared got cheers. [Which is why yeah, of course his mic wasn’t cut. Because the audience seemed to be taking his words well (how, I will never know) and because if Creation cut a cast member’s mic every time they said something stupid, there would never be an uninterrupted panel lol. But back to the point—] Between trying to seem like he’s not too at odds with Jared, and the audience’s literal reaction, of course Jensen didn’t speak up more. Again, what he did do was reel things in a bit, when he was finally given a second to actually get a sentence out.

Now as I mentioned earlier, I think what Jensen said is a part of a much broader way that he interprets parts of SPN, its angels, etc, which unfortunately had be highly interrupted and also come after Jared’s preface. But Jensen's response is not grounds to start pinning your hate on him (again, difference between someone having an ill opinion of you and someone's interpretation not completely aligning with yours.) NOW HERE IS THE PART I’VE REALLY BEEN WORKING UP TO. As we know, Jensen is shy and he doesn’t like the spotlight. And yet, he was part of a history-making scene in media, that out-trended the literal U.S. election. And in addition to probable NDAs and behind-the-scenes-cw-sniper + cast-and-crew nonsense, it’s not surprising that it’s taken him until now to say pretty much anything about Destiel at all (read: sexy silence). But lets think about this from his POV: He finally answers (or tries to answer, despite getting distracted and derailed by a costar) a question about Destiel. In fact, he even shares a bit of his own interpretation, which is what people say they want from him. And the second he does, everyone hates him. What do you think this is gonna lead to? No, it’s not gonna lead to him waking up tomorrow and agreeing with another viewpoint 100%. It’s gonna lead to him feeling like he should’t have opened his mouth about Destiel. It’s going to lead to him avoiding questions about it in the future, letting others answer for him [even if that other is Jared] or just being even more vague in his responses, in hopes that the less he says, the less upset people will be. 

[Sidenote: if they notice a lot of hate, this is a prime situation for other cast members starting to feel they have to pick sides—a friend or the shippers—which would not be great.]

Now, we know the confession scene meant a lot to Jensen. He literally had the filming of it recorded on his cell phone. And I would also say that, other proofs aside... knowing how deeply Jensen respects Misha?? It’s safe to assume that he genuinely does respect Misha’s interpretation of his own character that he played. And we know what Misha’s interpretation is, of course. [So Jensen, perhaps not in agreement on everything we wish he was, but still someone who values that we ship it and find meaning in it, which he’s said time and again. And that, that is important. That is support that means something, at least to me.] 

I also think it’s worth adding that if Jensen personally likes a softer interpretation, that may be less about Cas and more about keeping things ambiguous with Dean, because the more you imply about Cas the more you bring up about Dean. And he identifies deeply with Dean. So inadvertently implying things about Dean might be uncomfortable for him, but not because queer people make him uncomfortable (x). Rather—especially if he’s straight, and for argument’s sake I’m going with that atm—he struggles with toxic masculinity and loves that he can identify with a character who is a straight guy [wow that's hard to write as someone who loves bi dean] who can be soft and sweet and everything that Dean is, that’s still so beloved and respected as a character. (ie Dean might comfort him in a ‘you don’t have to be gay to be non-toxically masculine and have that be okay’ way.) This sidetone is not to say he is actively trying to be vague about Destiel (because again I think his answer was based on previous headcanons) but rather to point out that yeah, he has his own interpretations that are meaningful to him, which is okay, and despite his own interpretations he is still supportive of other readings of the text. But anyway, if he likes to let people know that multiple interpretations are okay—this is likely why.

ANYWAY, ALL THIS SAID, we run the risk here of making one out of two actors who were actually involved in Destiel shutting up about the ship for good, and NO, even if you don’t like what he has to say, that’s not a good thing. I love the Heller community, but for people who claim to want the ability to have open Destiel discourse, we certainly love to censor the heck out of people who talk about it in ways we don’t personally love. If Jensen were an anti, then yeah, that’d a be different issue. But seeing as he’s not, I feel like it’d be better for the fandom if we put down the pitchforks.

[kurokoros]

oh god I 100% agree with your stranger things post!! I was so confused during the first episode because I couldn’t remember 70% of the characters & I didn’t know if it was bc I have the memory span of a goldfish or if they were actually new ones. I wish I was more into it because I like some story elements but I just can’t get there. sorry for rambling in your asks gdkaga

Feel free to ramble away! I love talking (or complaining) about shows lmao

S1 was done so well because the season had a fantastic balance between the three plot thread groups (the kids, the teenagers, and the adults) and allowed those groups to interact seamlessly. Every single character felt integral to the story, regardless of the size of their role.

In contrast, S4 has so many characters that it feels like half of them don't need to be here. The Byers--the core of S1 that brought all of the plot threads together--don't have a place in S4. (I'm also just kind of sick of everything being connected to Eleven because ngl I've never really cared for her character post-S1)

Basically, like all other mega-hit shows that keep being given bigger budgets each season, Stranger Things has become over-written and bloated with new characters, while the old characters have virtually nothing to do. The series obviously looks extremely good, and the actors are fantastic, but the show has lost most of it's charm.

[starlene]

A random assortment of thoughts about Så som i himmelen Helsinki:

As I said, it’s good. Really good. To be quite honest, in my opinion, it’s the best musical the theatre has done in ages, and not only because it’s a personal favourite.

They’re the biggest state-supported theatre that does musicals in Finland. Lately, in my opinion, their productions have been lacking in imagination and style – probably because they’ve kept going for a certain kind of Broadway musical that’s big on the entertainment value but not very deep, and in all likelihood, very strictly supervised by the original producers even when you’re putting up a non-replica production.

But this one, a story with some real depth and a lot of heart, done by an innovative creative team who are allowed to make a very different production from the original... it’s so good. I wish they’ll keep doing shows like this in the future, too – maybe even an original (non-jukebox) Finnish musical at some point?

Oh well, that’s just my two cents on the theatre, and their normal style certainly has its fans, too. Anyway. Here are some thoughts about the production itself:

Tuukka Leppänen as Daniel? A perfect fit, just as I knew he would be. And so is Oona Airola as Lena. Their love story is so sweet, they make it so clear that these two characters have fun together. The ending hurt a lot!

The cast is really good in general! The only casting choice that confuses me a little is Antti Timonen as Stig. He’s not a bad actor or singer at all, but the tone of his voice is rather different from, say, the original Stig Anders Ekborg. He sounds lighter and younger. I guess they wanted Daniel and Stig to be around the same age here, to give their rivalry a new spin... but I can’t help it, in my mind I still see Stig as a more mature man with a bigger, booming voice. Oh well! Just personal preference.

Speaking of Stig, when it comes to the script, I’ve always been a bit confused by the character in general. He’s a Lutheran priest, but when it comes to sex, he has very Catholic issues. Sure, his big problem is self-hatred and I guess that’s at the root of his sexual repression, but in my opinion, the character could do with some rewriting to make things clearer. In any case, he always reminds me of Frollo, and that’s definitely the case here, too.

I liked our Arne and Holmfrid a lot... but it has to be said, no one does the Arne & Holmfrid forgiveness/bromance arc like Morgan Alling and Linus Eklund Adolphson did in Stockholm. One of my favourite subplots of the show, especially so when done so perfectly. I miss them!

It was my seventh time seeing this musical and I still cried a lot, my mask felt kinda soggy by the end. There’s something about the music that really gets under my skin, in a good way.

Can’t wait to see this again to pay even more attention to Daniel. He’s got a nice balance of anxiety and his love for music overriding his self-consciousness. He may have a terrible, awkward time going to the local store to buy a bicycle – but at the choir rehearsal, if him pretending to be a gorilla helps people to learn music better, he’s going to do it. His reaction to the chaos during the first choir rehearsal was perfect, as was his reaction to Stig firing him.

I also really enjoyed Inger! She just had good vibes radiating from her. I need to pay more attention to her, too.

They had Small Daniel and Medium Daniel follow Big Daniel around (not in every scene or anything, but they popped up every now and then), and Medium Daniel played the violin 58 sekunder and the finale. A good choice, if you ask me – it made the finale, with Daniel reuniting with the both of them, feel a lot less over-the-top and awkward than in the other productions I’ve seen.

They really milked out the bit where Lena says it might be the time to paint another little angel on the school wall. Fredrik Kempe told us that when they were writing the show, the intention was that Lena was struck by a feeling she had just gotten pregnant with Daniel’s child (even though they made love for the first time just, like, fifteen minutes ago, so it’s not necessarily super realistic – but apparently, it’s based on a personal irl experience of someone involved), and she was feeling nervous to tell him. Here, she wasn’t nervous at all, and they were both so happy about it. Pretty cute, to be honest.

(My personal interpretation of the Stockholm production was that Lena knew she was having a child, but the father could’ve been one of her previous boyfriends... and that Daniel was just 100% happy for her, because by then, he knew that they were meant to be and that they would support each other through everything from now on. I still like my interpretation better! Maybe I’m just too boring for magical moments like that, but for me personally, her just miraculously knowing right away feels too unrealistic.)

It feels so, so sad to me that there were only a couple of hundred people in the huge theatre to enjoy this, because of the pandemic restrictions. Here in Finland, we’re currently stuck in a nonsense situation where everyone says they agree the restrictions should be lifted, but there’s some extremely strict legislation in place, and it’s taking the government forever to make the actual decision to reverse it. It’s got nothing to do with keeping people safe anymore, it’s just politics. I hate it. Since the whole damn plot is about doing things together, this show truly falls a bit flat when you feel like you’re all alone in the audience.

Even so, though, I had a great time. Certainly looking forward to seeing this again!

[baroquebucky]

request: Hi. Can you write something about being in the movie with Timmy and he made an agreement with managers about being in relationship with you to increase the popularity of the movie. And you start dating but you dont know about agreement. And then you get to know the truth and you are heartbroken. Timothee is heartbroken too because he really falls for you. With happy ending

a/n: i hope you guys enjoy this and let me know what u all think !! sorry for any typos heh send in some requests :-)

You arrived on set for the last time, smiling at everyone as you entered the trailer for your makeup and talked to your stylist as usual, filled with giddy and sadness as the production wrapped up. You weren’t sure what you more more upset about, the finishing of a movie with a cast you so deeply loved, or the fact that you wouldn’t see a specific curly headed french boy everyday.

The thought of drifting apart from timothée lingered in your mind as you filmed the final shots for the movie. Over the course of several months you had developed a crush on him, I mean who wouldn’t? He was damn near perfect. He was sweet to everyone on set which was more than you can say for other actors you’ve worked with, he was funny and down to earth, he loved almost all the music you did, and he was so articulate.

As you snapped out of your thoughts you heard the director call for a quick break, you sighed, squeezing your eyes shut and taking a breath before going to get a bottle of water.

“are you excited that it’s almost over?” Timothée asked you. Looking over at him you shot him a smile, “bittersweet” you replied, leaning on the table and looking at the whole set, everyone was running around getting things done, fixing things or trying to make sure nothing messed up. “I hope you don’t forget me when you win an Oscar or something” timmy laughed and you rolled your eyes, “please if it’s gonna be one of us it’s gonna be you” you replied, hearing the director calling everyone back to set. “I’ll catch you later yeah?” You spoke, waving at te boy, he smiled back at you nodding.

Timothée smiled as he saw the way you greeted everyone around you, despite being an award winning actress you were always so down to earth and humble. “Timothée we need to speak to you” his agent spoke up next to him, motioning for him to go to his trailer so they could speak.

As he entered the trailer he saw another man sitting down, papers by his side. “What’s all this?” The boy asked, confused and looking at the two men in the trailer with him. “Timothée this is Robert” his agent spoke up. “We want you to date y/n for publicity” Robert said, handing timothée the papers. He was shocked, sort of offended too.

“I’m sorry what? No!” He scoffed, pushing the papers back to the man, not even wanting to read them. His agent spoke up, “listen man, it’s gonna be good PR for the both of you, the movie will get more recognition. It’s a win win for everyone” he pointed out and timothée thought about it for a second. He didn’t like you like that, right? I mean sure he thought you were pretty but you didn’t even know each other. He knew your favorite colors and things like that, he didn’t really know you like that.

“What did she say?” Timothée asked, looking at the man across from him. “We didn’t tell her, we knew she would reject it and we all know when she’s firm about something there’s no swaying her” the man spoke and timothée smiled a little, you were very hard headed.

“Timothée think about it, it benefits everyone” his agent pushed, and he shook his head. “I- I don’t know I have to think about it” he furrowed his brows and his agent nodded, the two men leaving, leaving him and the papers alone in his trailer.

Timothée had read over the papers, he couldn’t tell anyone that it was fake, not even his mom. He groaned and ran his hand through his hair. It would only be six months before the release of the movie, he could get to know you by then.

He was in his trailer for hours contemplating every possible pro and con, the sun had already set and he could hear the set winding down. “Fuck it,” he sighed. Before he could change his mind he signed the agreement, shutting the small Manila folder and walking out of his trailer to hand his agent the papers.

“hey timmy t” you smiled, falling into step with him, he almost choked on his spit, quickly hiding the papers from your view. “hey y/n” he replied, eyes searching for his agent. “what’s that?” You asked, looking at the papers he was poorly concealing. “Nothing, i have to give it to my agent, have you seen them?” You nodded pointing to your right and he thanked you quickly, speeding off before stopping after a couple seconds.

“what time are you done filming today?” He turned on his heels and your heart rate sped up. “What time is it?” You asked. “8:53” he spoke and you smiled, “9:25 ish?” You smiled, he nodded. “Wanna go get some food after?” He smiled sheepishly, you felt yourself flush, nodding slightly before speaking up, “yeah! That sounds great” you replied, he smiled at you and nodded, walking away. You bit your lip, smiling at the ground and holding back a squeal.

As you finished filming you quickly went to trailer, packing up a couple of your things and changing for your dinner with timmy.

Dinner was amazing, the two of you laughing the whole tome and getting to know each other better, you were confused as to why all of sudden he was making a move but you brushed it off, not wanting to ruin something you’ve always wanted.

After that night the two of you went out a lot more over the course of several months, going on small little dates, picnics, watching movies, going to game nights together, sending each other memes, the two of you even went roller blading one time. It was going so well, you noticed the way he would text you more often and the way the two of you hung out a lot more. So did the media.

You’re doing great with y/n, wish the holidays coming up maybe introduce her to your family, post about it and such.

Timothée stared at the message, his heart sinking. He locked his phone and smiled back at you, putting his phone in his pocket and joining you on your couch. “thanksgiving is coming around” he spoke up and you looked away from the TV screen. “uh huh” you replied, heart racing as you realized what he wanted. “I think we’re doing great you know and- well I want you to meet my family” he spoke quickly, nervous as to what you would say.

“as what?” you frowned, slightly hurt that the boy had never asked you to be his girlfriend despite acting like a couple. Timothée smiled at you, leaning in to kiss your nose.

“As my girlfriend?” He blushed, a smile breaking into you face as you squealed and jumped on him, kissing all over his face. He laughed and caught your lips in his, smiling into the kiss. He pulled away for a second, “so is that a ‘yes I’ll be your girlfriend and meet your family’ or” you smiled at him, “it is” you replied, kissing him once more.

By the time the holidays came every magazine, talk show and social media had been posting your relationship, “co stars turned lovers” was their favorite phrase for the two of you. You didn’t care though, both you and timmy were falling deeper and deeper everyday, you were overjoyed, he was scared. The six months began next week. Six months suddenly seemed much too short.

So many dates, so many little gifts, so many funny messages, so many memories and so much love.

Anytime you saw him you got butterflies, a blush would rise on your cheeks when he checked you out or complimented you, usually in that order. Anytime he saw you and you would stare at him in awe he would blush, getting nervous as you hyped him up. Anytime the two of you were together both of your stories had at least on picture of the other with a teasing caption. It was all so real. Until timothée realized it wasn’t. Right?

“Angel, do you wanna get pizza tonight?” Timothée asked you, looking up at you as you played with his hair. You thought about it for a second, nodding your head and a smile broke onto his face. “okay, can you order it? I really have to pee all of a sudden” he laughed, getting up from his position on the couch and heading to the restroom.

Your phone was still in your room so you decided to grab timothées, waking the screen up, a small smile on your face as you see a picture of the two of you laughing with the sunset behind you, both of you in sweats. You remembered that you had told him you wanted to take pictures during sunset, and so that same day he had dragged you out of your apartment and suprised you with a picnic date, making some random lady take pictures of the two of you during sunset.

You were brought out of your thoughts as the phone vibrated in your hands

Only two more weeks with y/n and you’re free from the agreement. Thank you for doing this, the movie is doing great and getting great reviews already. Told you this would work out! Have faith next time.

Your heart dropped, agreement? What agreement? Before you could stop yourself you unlocked the phone, clicking on the conversation and seeing all the messages between timothée and the unregistered number.

Thank you for agreeing to this, by faking a relationship this will 100% get the movie amazinf publicity.

Take her out to dinner, I can send you an address for a nice place, we will pay for it.

When do I have to ask her out?

Whenever you’d like, it has to be before the six months start.

There’s a nice roller skating arena, it’s open tomorrow take her, we will make sure there’s cameras there after a couple hours.

Make her meet your family.

I don’t see her like that, why would she have to meet my family?

Every real relationship has that, make it feel real.

Your eyes watered as you continued to read through the conversation. So it wasn’t real? None of it?

You felt your chest tighten and your breathing grew shallow. Your heart physically hurt, you wanted to break down, cry, scream, punch him. You heard the sink water start in the restroom. Before he came out you rushed to the room, getting your phone, and rushing out of the apartment, turning into an alley before you broke down into silent sobs.

“mon amour where’d you go?” Timothée asked, a smile on his face, excited to spend the nights cuddling with you. “y/n quit playing cmon i miss you” he pouted, checking every room. He furrowed his brows and went to check his phone. It was unlocked. And opened was the conversation with Robert and him. His heart fell. He wanted to break his phone, throw it across the room. He wanted to punch Robert in the face, fight his agent for talking him into this.

Most of all he wanted you. He wanted you when you just woke up and were angry because you had fallen asleep late last night despite knowing you had to get up early. He wanted you when you accident burned food trying to make fancy dinners. He wanted you when you were all glammed up and ready to attend an event. He wanted you when it was just the two of you on a rainy day, cuddling in bed and sharing stories. God, he wanted you. He loved you.

You called an Uber, quickly climbing in and heading straight to your apartment. When you got home you quickly locked the door, turning on the shower and letting the hot water run. You grabbed an over sized shirt you had bought a couple years back and some shorts and fuzzy socks. Without thinking you undressed and got into the shower, letting the hot water burn you for a second before adjusting the temperature. You stood there for a minute before sobs racked your body once again.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” Timothée groaned, pacing in his living room, looking at the spot where you once were. What the hell was he gonna do now? Sure it started out as nothing but he loved you now, he couldn’t live without you. But there was no way you were going to believe that. How can he prove it to you? He stopped mid-step, rummaging through his closet until he found the small box.

You stepped out of the shower, steam floating about in your restroom as you changed, you let out a shaky breath, you can get through this.

You had so much of timothées things in your room, you decided to curl up on your couch, mindlessly flipping through channels before stopping on National Geographic, half paying attention to the cheetah hunting a gazelle. Your mind wandered to timothée, was he relieved you were gone? Did he ever mean anything he said?

New hot tears streamed down your face, letting out a quiet sob. You didn’t care about your neighbors hearing you anymore, letting out sob and after sob, trying to catch your breath. A knock on your door made you get quiet. Quickly you grabbed a tissue from besides you and blew your nose, rushing to the kitchen to splash water on your flushed face. Before opening the door you looked in the mirror, your eyes were puffy and red, your nose was tinted red and your cheeks were a light pink. Your hair was frizzy, you didn’t bother putting it up.

You opened the door, not wanting to see anyone, however you put on a smile. It quickly fell when you saw a certain curly headed french boy. You went to slam the door it he was quicker, stopping it before it closed, easily over powering you and opening it wider.

“Leave. Now” you spoke firmly, your voice cold and stern. His heart broke at the sight of you, you couldn’t even look at him. “ma cherie please let me explain” he spoke, wanting nothing more then to pick you up and carry you to bed, kissing all your problems away. “Don’t you fucking dare call me that Timothée.” You snapped.

Timothée.

His heart fell once again, no pet name. Of course not, he would be furious too.

“y/n please, let me explain please.” He begged, bottom lip quivering, you could tell he wanted to cry. All it took was one look into his eyes, god. You fell in love with his eyes the moment you saw them. They made your knees weak and made you smile like nothing else. You let out a sigh, taking your hand off the door and walking into the living room. Timmy smiled slightly, following you in.

“You have 10 minutes” you spoke, sitting down. Timothée nodded, sitting next to you, keeping some distance for your comfort.

“I know you think that this was all fake but i swear to you on my mom that it wasn’t. Yes it was an agreement but that was before i knew you. Before i actually knew you. Do you remember that day on set, the last day of filming and i walked with you and asked you to dinner?” He looked at you and you nodded.

“The paper in my hands, that was the agreement, they told me about it only a couple hours before and my agent kept talking me into it, saying it would help both of us and that it would help the movie and I thought it wouldn’t be that bad you know?” He paused looking at you.

“faking a relationship with someone ‘wouldn’t be that bad?’ Are you serious?” You scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest. He sighed before continuing.

“After i took you to dinner i texted my agent, i told him i wanted out of the contract, i felt bad, but he wouldn’t let me, Robert- the guy i gave the contract to- would ruin my career and yours too. So of course i kept going, i wasn’t gonna let you fall for something I did. I felt bad, i thought ‘whatever it’s only six months’ but then we got closer and i spent so much time with you and i fell for you, so fucking hard. God y/n i fell in love with you. I’m still in love with you.” He smiled, he wanted to hold your hands, but he stopped himself.

“I remember exactly the moment when I realized I was in love with you. We were at the park, it was a Friday and there were so many dogs, and everytime one passed us you would catch up to their owner to ask to pet them, we were there for hours because of you, and i realized that I didn’t want to be anywhere else but with you.” His eyes watered, looking at you, a year left your eye and you quickly wiped it away.

“Y/n please, you have to believe me, fuck the contract, fuck Robert. I love you. I love you so much and i hate myself for even doing this and for putting you through this, please, one more chance and I swear to you i won’t fuck it up” he pleaded, scooting closer to you and taking one of your hands in both of his.

“how do i know you aren’t doing this because robert said you had to?” You whispered, looking into his eyes and looking all over his face to try read his emotions, you could tell he was being sincere.

He reached into his pocket, pulling out a small box. “You always talked about this ring you loved, how it meant so much to you for no reason. You told me that at 3:27 am, you were so woozy from not having slept at all because you wanted to see how long you could last without sleep. You told me you would only sleep if i sang you a lullaby and so when i started singing Mary had a little lamb you stopped me, and told me the only song ‘available’ was statistics. And so you made me sing statistics to you four times before you passed out.” He smiled at you, you couldn’t stop the smile that broke onto your face, he was so embarrassed that night but you knew he would do anything to make you sleep.

“After you fell asleep i ordered you the ring, I hid it in my closet because i knew you would get so mad at me if you found out i bought it for you.” He smiled sheepishly and you laughed, nodding your head, sniffling a little. “I’m giving it to you now as a promise, I promise you that i love you. All of those little moments, the stolen kisses, the messy sheets, the intense aracde rivalry we have- everything, they mean so much to me. You mean everything to me. It was real for me, it was so real and i can’t lose you, not now, not ever.” He finished, looking at you to try and read your emotions, he was scared shitless, his hands shaking, still holding your one hand tightly.

You pulled your hand out of his, wiping your face before you looked at him. “I love you too timmy” you spoke softly, he let out a small sigh of relief. “you have to understand that I’m hurt, that we can’t just automatically go back like nothing happened” you spoke, looking at the boy as he nodded frantically.

“I know, i know we can go at your pace” he reassured, a smile on his face. You looked at him, a grin on your face. “then ask me, for real this time” you spoke up, staring into his eyes, memorizing every little detail of them.

“y/n y/l/n, will you be my girlfriend?” He asked, a smile on his face as he leaned in slowly, you nodded quickly, a smile breaking onto your face. “of course i will, little timmy t” you giggled and he scrunched his face up, his hand cupped your cheek and pulled you in for the kiss, the two of you stopping because you kept giggling.

“I love you” you whispered, resting your head on his chest. He smiled at you, responding within a heartbeat, “i love you mon amour.”

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

TWDG: The Final Season | Character Discussion | 1/2

Part 1 | Part 2

“Everyone’s counting on me to step up. Be the leader they need me to be... I really want to be that for them.”  

So.... let’s talk about Marlon. 

I mean, let’s really talk about him. Ever since I started this blog, some common questions I get revolve around Marlon- “How do you feel about Marlon?” “Do you think he deserved a redemption arc?” “Why do you think he was sent to Ericson?” “In your opinion, is Marlon a bad person?” and many others. 

Some ask with expectations that I’ll express a distaste or hatred for him, while others ask with a more sympathetic approach. If you know me, if you’ve been here for a while, then you know that I do indeed like Marlon as a character, and today I want to talk about him from my perspective while playing this game. 

And with that comes a seemingly unnecessary disclaimer, but one I feel I need to add in order to make it abundantly clear: I will be discussing MY thoughts, experiences, and feelings about Marlon within TFS and give my take on his character. Because we’re not the same person, you may have a different opinion or perspective on his character, you may disagree with something I say, and that’s perfectly okay. You’re entitled to your opinion as I am mine, and I do encourage you to join in on the discussion and express your thoughts about Marlon, but I also want to let you know that you can do that without attacking me or anyone else. 

Really, this is pretty much me looking at Marlon’s role and arc within TFS, discussing points of his character that I find interesting, exploring the why’s and how’s of his actions, maybe coming up with a couple theories as to why he was sent to Ericson, and basically giving a lot of personal opinions of him. It’s a discussion meant in good fun, that’s all I’m saying. 

Before we dive right in, I do want to thank @pi-creates​ for providing me with most of the screenshots used in this. I appreciate the help! If you haven’t already, go check out Pi’s blog for some of the best screenshots and model swaps in the TWDG community! Thank you, thank you!

[First and foremost, y’all are sleeping on Ray Chase’s performance as Marlon and it really shows]

“Looks like I was announced as Marlon, the central focus in this first episode of The Walking Dead Season 4 coming in a few weeks. I've been playing this series since the beginning, and it was a real honor to be a part of the canon. I hope you enjoy!“ - Ray Chase’s Twitter account | July 26, 2018

I want to start this off with praising Marlon’s voice actor, Ray Chase, for doing such a perfect job of bringing Marlon’s character to life. Every emotion and infliction feels genuine, and there’s isn’t a single moment where I don’t “see” Marlon, y’know? I mean that in the sense that every line delivered is believable and doesn’t break my immersion with, “Oof, they really used that take?” 

I know we throw praise upon Melissa, Tayla, Sterling, and Gideon [and for good reason, they’re all fantastic, too!] but even with them there are a couple of lines that I notice have a lack of flow or sound just a bit off. I’ve played TFS how many times? And not once have I had that issue with Ray Chase as Marlon, so bravo to this man. Credit where credit is due, his performance is damn near flawless.

Especially in the confrontation scene at the end of Done Running. I’ll get into that scene as a whole later, but just looking at the performance and the intense, impactful emotion brought to that scene, just..... *chef kiss*

Thank you, Ray Chase. 

[What’s up with your haircut, Marlon?]

“Uh, I look cool... I say, I look cool.”

Lemme talk a little bit about Marlon’s design- I think he looks great. 

I love the little details in the Ericson varsity jacket he wears... including the fact that it looks just a tad bit too snug on him. Like, either the boy doesn’t have another jacket or he’s grown so attached to this one that he’s not willing to admit that he’s outgrown it a bit. 

I’ve had a lot of people point out that it’s nice to see a teenage character in these games with actual acne since most media pretends that acne just doesn’t exist, and I agree. We all know that if this were more realistic, then everyone would have terrible, greasy, dirty skin but... y’know. 

And y’know what? I like the mullet! It’s unique! And I choose to believe it’s a representation of Marlon’s past with bad decisions he’s too stubborn to admit were bad decisions... I mean, he’s had it since he was a kid and hadn’t grown it out or cut it off [to our knowledge, I suppose] sooo... there’s that. 

Or maybe he does actually think it looks badass. Either way. 

Hell, my biggest complaint about Marlon’s design is that I wish they kept more to this concept art attire:

Because Marlon looks super good in this concept art. I love the headband with the mullet and his clothes actually look more comfortable... but like, it’s fine. He still looks great in the game, his little jacket’s cool, bringing back the mullet...its fine. I’m just sayin’. He looks great. 

[Marlon’s introduction in TFS]

“It's our little kingdom. I just do what I can to keep the peace. Wasn't always like this, though. There used to be a lot of us, but...you know how it goes.”

Let’s talk about how Marlon’s introduced. 

We get our first look at him after Clementine and AJ crash their car during the walker attack. A bunch of arrows come flying, hitting walkers attempting to get ahold of them, and as Clementine glances over she sees a figure pulling AJ out of the car. And even though you can tell it’s Marlon, this closer shot from Pi-

-100% confirms that it’s him. Not that you had any doubt, but still.

What’s interesting, though, is that while snooping around for some insight about Marlon from the writers/devs, wandering around reddit, replaying the game myself, and even glancing over the all-knowing wiki that’s never wrong ever, it seems agreed upon that Marlon wasn’t alone, despite no one else being specifically mentioned to have helped Clementine and AJ. 

Which makes sense that that’d be the case, but I did come across a handful of people who are pretty adamant that he was alone, which is an interesting take, though I disagree.

I’m pretty sure most people do, too. I mean, Marlon says, “It's good we found you when we did. It wasn't easy getting you two out of that wreck, and walkers were on the way.” So I don’t even think that was the writers’ intention of it being solely Marlon who saved them.

What’s funny is I came across a post Instagram [I know, the most legitimate source for info and thoughtful opinions] that was surprisingly trying to redeem/defend Marlon rather than chastise him by claiming he’s a hero who saved Clementine and AJ by himself. 

The thing is, they’re both unconscious after the wreck, so unless Marlon has super-human speed to grab AJ, zip around the car to grab Clementine, and then uses super-human strength to carry both of them AND their belongings all while killing any threatening walkers coming after them with his bow... I’m gonna have to press [X] Doubt. 

Besides, I like the idea of it being vague. I like to think that was the intention. “Who was Marlon with? A hunting party! You fill in the blanks!” That sort of deal.

With everything that we know about Marlon and the safe-zone, it does lead to questions about why he and whoever felt they had to go outside it to see what was happening. Marlon points out in his conversation with Clementine that they “had to work fast. I don't know what would've happened if we hadn't seen the smoke...” And later Violet mentions an explosion, so I think it’s safe to say that they heard the explosion and followed the smoke to the location. 

If you don’t know about the raiders and the twins [like it’s your first time playing] then you probably assume that Marlon and his group were being kind in rescuing them, which I don’t doubt but it does make you wonder about things from Marlon’s perspective, y’know?

This is one of those “shhh, don’t think, just go with it” moments. If I had to give a reason, I’d say that the group he was with didn’t think twice about checking it out and even if Marlon did protest, he didn’t have much choice but to follow. Then, seeing that it’s Clementine and AJ, I believe he genuinely wanted to save them. 

“All alone with the kid? Not a pleasant thought. I've seen some rough scenes. But that one would've been up there.”

We get our second and more official introduction to Marlon after Clementine escapes her dorm and confronts Tenn... and it’s pretty fucking good. I mean, everything from him being hidden in the shadows with his bow drawn, to the clear concern yet sternness in his voice as he assures Clementine they’re not going to hurt her and to put the knife down, to his sympathetic apology for scaring her is just an A+. 

One thing this season does exceptionally well is introducing its characters. Marlon has such a confident yet chill way about him when you first meet that it’s actually disheartening to think that in two hours he’s gonna be pulling a gun and MURDER....

Sigh. 

Let’s not jump that far ahead yet. I’m not ready. 

What I find appealing about this next part is Clementine’s reaction to seeing the inside of Ericson for the first time and how taken aback she seems by it. I also love how easy and comfortable it is to talk with Marlon as they’re walking through the yard even though we just met him. 

I enjoy that you can tell he’s trying to get a better idea of who she is without pressuring or overwhelming her and doing his best not to offend. And even when Clementine questions if he doesn’t think she can handle herself, he’s decent about apologizing and explaining that’s not what he meant. But he’s also not afraid to be upfront about AJ’s behavior since they brought him here, either.

He does come off as annoyed when talking about AJ being a handful. We don’t know how long Clementine’s been passed out or how long they had to deal with AJ after he woke up, so who knows how much of a little terror AJ was before they either dumped him with Louis or Louis decided to take him to the music room to chill... where he then bit Ruby. 

Anyway, the first impression I got of Marlon is that he’s genuinely friendly, trying to help Clementine and AJ even if AJ’s been a nuisance, and he’s confident in the system he has in place for them. He is rather forward and proud about being the school’s leader when first telling Clementine. 

Having played through the whole season several times and knowing how Done Running ends, it’s interesting to look at Clementine’s first conversation with Marlon with that all knowing perspective- knowing what he did to the twins, knowing that Brody’s involved and that Marlon’s going to eventually kill her, going to try and frame Clementine for the murder, knowing that he was planning on giving Clementine and AJ away...

I can definitely look at this conversation with a more skeptical lens and say he’s more so trying to sell the idea that he has everything under control in this kingdom for kids and he’s a proper leader with a system in place despite being so young with no adults around. But hey, that’s the natural progression- Ericson is a perfectly chill safe haven and the Ericson crew get along swell... except no, the cracks slowly begin to surface as the episode goes on until all hell breaks loose with Marlon at the center. 

[Rosie is best girl]

“You said dogs brought back bad memories. I'm sorry, I didn't realize you were so scared of them. But I swear, Rosie's not as frightening as she seems...See? She's harmless. She just needs to get to know you, is all. Here. I'll show you. Do you trust me? “

I’ll be completely honest- the thing that initially sold me on trusting Marlon the first time I ever played this episode was his relationship with Rosie. 

If you know me, then you know that I love dogs. I have a pup named Piglet that I adore, I’ve grown up with dogs my whole life, and I have a huge appreciation and soft spot for animals.  I’m one of those people that can’t stand others who are mean or cruel to harmless animals. It’s different if you’re hunting for food or if an animal attacks you and you’re defending yourself... but I’ve known people who have gone out of their way to hurt animals. I’m out in a country area with a lot of dangerous roads for wandering animals, and the amount of people I’ve driven with who’ll swerve to hit a squirrel, a cat, a dog because they enjoy it is too many. After those incidents, I cut those people out of my life.  If you don’t have that love and appreciation in your heart, then I want nothing to do with you. 

So when I saw that Rosie, while the school’s dog, is more portrayed to be Marlon’s dog above everyone else, I remember thinking to myself, “Okay, I trust him. He clearly loves this dog, wouldn’t mistreat her, and that’s a step in the right direction.”  

While I wasn’t skeptical of him and his intentions before, it really was that natural relationship he held with Rosie that kind of sealed the deal for me- “I like Marlon! He’s probably going to die because he’s the leader and they never last but when it does happen, I’m gonna be super upset about it.” 

And well, to be fair... I was super upset when he died, just more so than I originally planned because there was also that element of betrayal mixed into the pain, y’know? 

Speaking of trust and Rosie- My second favorite Marlon scene is the office scene. But let’s talk about the Rosie bit specifically. After Tenn leaves and Rosie comes in, she scares Clementine and brings back those traumatic memories of when Sam attacked her. 

Marlon comes in and cools the situation, and I love the way he talks to Clementine in this moment. 

I love that he doesn’t immediately turn to Clementine like, “What’d you do?” but recognizes that she’s afraid of Rosie due to her previous experience, one that he remembers her mentioning. He also knows how well trained Rosie is to recognize scents and people, which explains why she’s behaving that way- she doesn’t know Clementine. 

I feel like I’m using this word a lot, but Marlon’s approach to helping Clementine with her fear of dogs feels so genuine. He holds his hand out and waits for her to accept, and if she does, he walks Clementine through what to do, beginning Clementine’s bond with Rosie. 

“Get down on her level. Let her get your scent. It's okay. She's not gonna hurt you.”

It’s incredibly sweet and humanizing to see Marlon like this. 

The best part about this scene, though, is that you can reject Marlon’s offer and he won’t be upset. 

“No problem. I'm not gonna pressure you.”

And he doesn’t. He doesn’t get annoyed, he doesn’t press, no questions asked, and he doesn’t say anything to make Clementine feel bad for her decision. He respects that she isn’t ready to get close with Rosie.

The reason I love this is because how many times have we made decisions in this game, big and small, and had the other characters get annoyed or try to guilt us? “Oh, you don’t want to bond with the dog? Rosie’s the best, everyone loves dogs! What’s wrong with you?” None of that here. That’s something I appreciate about Marlon in this moment. 

It shows that when he wants to, he can listen and understand those around him... something he clearly struggles with when it comes to certain members of Ericson.

I’ll swing back around and talk about that entire scene in a bit, but one last thing about Rosie... can I just say how heart breaking it is to hear her whine at Marlon’s funeral? Solidifying that she was definitely Marlon’s dog more than anyone else’s? And the way Rosie lays on his grave several times in episode 2? 

Oof. 

[Ericson’s perception of Marlon prior to the final confrontation and after]

“...when the world went to shit, he bailed. All the other adults did. Left us behind to fend for ourselves...  Now it's just us kids left.”

I want to touch on how the Ericson crew seem to view Marlon as a leader before and after the final confrontation.

When looking at and discussing a character, it’s important to not just focus solely on them. You can gather a lot about a character based on how others respond and perceive them.

Not everyone expresses something towards Marlon within Done Running. Y’know, like Omar or Ruby, for example. Though we do get a bit more from them after Marlon’s death, their perception of him is different now that they’ve learned what he’s done and witnessed his murder.

So we don’t know how Ruby, Omar, Willy or Mitch viewed his leadership prior to those events, y’know? It’s safe to assume that they’re fine following him as a leader since they’re background characters at this point and make no objections to his leadership at any time before the confrontation. But, after learning the truth, they turned against him. 

Then things get complicated when Marlon’s murder traumatizes them. 

What a mess.

But for this section, there are two characters I want to get into specifics about. They’re worth talking about because they further Marlon’s character, but they’re not the most important, y’know? Characters like Louis, Tenn, and Brody will get their own sections. 

The one I find most interesting among side characters is Aasim. Right off the bat, you get a feel for what his relationship is like with Marlon:

Marlon: “How'd it go out there?”

Aasim: “How do you think it went?”

Brody: “Be nice, Aasim.”

Aasim: “The safe zone's nearly dry. I could barely find enough for tonight. We're gonna have to scout out further if we want food for the winter.”

Marlon: “We'll talk about it later.”

Aasim: “Bullshit, we should talk about this right now-”

Marlon: “I said later, damn it!”

So... they’re not exactly besties. The game makes a clear point that Aasim is more vocal in his disagreements and concerns towards Marlon than the others. They even reiterate it when you talk with him later:

“He keeps pulling back the safe zone. We have fewer and fewer places to hunt. Which means we're gonna have fewer and fewer things to eat.”

No one else opposes Marlon like he does, not counting Brody in the basement since that’s a whole other thing and Brody will get an entire segment to herself later.

It’s pretty clear that this isn’t the first time they’ve had this conversation, but because Marlon’s in a place of power, Aasim doesn’t have much choice but to go along with it. Because no one else is speaking up, he doesn’t have anyone to back him up, and you can tell he goes with it reluctantly. He also voices annoyances when it comes to how Marlon treats Louis if you go hunting.

Knowing this, you can infer that Marlon doesn’t want to hear what Aasim has to say, and he doesn’t appreciate someone questioning his leadership. When Aasim steps in Marlon’s path and says, “Bullshit, we should talk about this right now-” what does Marlon do?

He shoves his shoulder into Aasim’s as he pushes past, and in a louder, commanding tone, replies, “I said later, damn it!” which leads to Aasim glaring after him... but he doesn’t pursue. Marlon has a hard time with someone like Aasim and his response is to shut him down rather than stop, listen to his concerns, and address them.

That’s something Marlon struggles with as a leader- control and listening. Control over his temper and anger, listening and addressing the concerns of the people he swears to protect.

The reason I bring this up is because Aasim is our first indication that the image Marlon was giving off previously isn’t as spotless as he wants us to believe. Aasim plants a seed of doubt, y’know? He gives an argument that the player can get behind.

“Yeah, why not extend the safe zone? If food is really as bad as you say it is, then what other choice is there? Just be extra cautious so no one gets hurt,” which can then lead to thinking, “Why is Marlon so insistent about the safe zone? Is he hiding something?”

Once that seed is there, it grows.

Now as for how Aasim’s view of Marlon changes during and after the confrontation, you can see that he’s one of the few that wants to hear Clementine’s side to things, and he steps forward after Louis/Violet intervenes.

Then after Marlon dies, Aasim is... well, he’s rather neutral? And I say that meaning he’s more in a middle ground between Louis and Violet, who are on extreme opposite ends. Aasim isn’t okay with Marlon’s death, nor is he okay with AJ killing him, but he can see that kicking Clementine and AJ out isn’t the best solution. Hence why he voted for them to stay.

You can see he’s still angry at Marlon for what he did during the funeral scene, but the game doesn’t care to show more beyond that. Which, in my opinion, was a missed opportunity on their part.  

And because I’m me, I also want to add that this perfectly sets up the idea of Aasim taking over once Marlon died and the writers shot themselves in the foot for wasting him like that. Good job.

Now let’s talk about Violet. People love when I do that.

Marlon and Violet don’t interact too much prior to the confrontation. The most we see them together is during the card game, and they’re chill. Violet makes fun of his hair, he says he looks cool, they’re decent to each other, it’s all good. They’re on friendly terms. 

Which I do find it interesting that she seems like she’s chill with Marlon, but she has such a hard time with Brody. Granted, that’s because she was supposed to go with them but asked Brody to cover her, and then when the twins died, she felt guilty. But you’d think that she’d also have some issues with Marlon, given that he was also there and, like Brody, unable to save them.

You could argue that because Violet and Brody were friends before it had a stronger effect, whereas she and Marlon weren’t ever that close, so it didn’t strike as bad, y’know? 

Though this does kind of get explained later if you choose to stick with Violet through ep4. Well, sort of? A little? She tells you:

Violet: “...I remember how Marlon described it, what we were gonna turn Ericson into. It's not the way any of us pictured it.”

Clementine: “How did you picture it?”

Violet: “I guess I couldn't. I just listened to what Marlon said. How it would be a home, a real one. But I couldn't really wrap my head around it.”

And when she talks about people who cared about her that she pushed away, she does list Marlon as one of those people, which is super interesting given all the loathing she’s done towards him after the truth came out.

It could be that in the past, she saw Marlon as the leader and why would he lie? He’s the one who stepped up, promised that they’d made Ericson into something special, into a brand new home... what reason does she have to distrust him?

So when she finds out the truth... well, that betrayal completely shatters everything she has for Marlon, going as far as for her to believe that AJ was justified in what he did and shit talking Marlon in front of his mourning best friend. 

So her reaction to Marlon after this makes sense, but what does this tell us about Marlon himself?

Again, depending on how you view him, you can look at this idea of Marlon being kind to Violet and them being on friendly terms after what happened to the twins a few different ways- Marlon was manipulating Violet solely for his sake, or Marlon felt guilty that something he did hurt her this bad and tried to make Violet feel better, or both.

I think it was both. After the twins died, we all know the amount of guilt Marlon carried with him, so having to be confronted with the fallout of that in the form of someone like Violet... he had to be careful. I don’t doubt that he cared about Violet or that he tried to reach out to her, but he also had to protect himself for the sake of maintaining his leadership and control of Ericson. So, of course, he had to lie to her which manipulated her feelings about him and the situation. 

I believe Violet recognized it, too. When she says they should’ve asked more questions about what happened, I think that’s her being more pissed with herself for trusting Marlon and not questioning him further, for taking his word for it. 

I’ve come across theories suggesting that Marlon actually manipulated Violet into placing blame onto Brody rather than him, which is why she is on friendly terms with him but not so much Brody. And that’s a valid interpretation. There isn’t any solid evidence of this within the game to suggest either way, but I can definitely see how someone would come to that conclusion. Especially after the confrontation.

Now let’s touch on Violet if you appeal to her, because Marlon does something that makes me go “Hmmmm...”

Clementine, when she appeals to Violet, say, “Violet you have to believe me.”

To which, Marlon immediately steps in and says, “You don't. You met her, like, two days ago!”

He doesn’t even give her a chance to speak. 

With Louis, he’s so overly confident that he has him completely wrapped around his finger that he doesn’t feel the need to say anything. He feels he has control over Louis. But with Violet, he feels his control might not be as strong, so he needs to remind her that she just met Clementine, whereas she’s known him for years- something he uses against the whole group.

And when Clementine tries to talk to her, Marlon takes a low blow and it’s super shitty.

“Don't let her get in your head. Hey, what would Minnie want you to do? She was my friend, too. So was Brody.”

He’s desperate to crawl out of the grave this situation has put him in that he’s willing to go this low, doing everything he can to make sure Violet doubts Clementine... and y’know, whose to say this is the first time Marlon is using Minnie to manipulate her? And when it doesn’t work, he gets frustrated like “Violet being difficult. Why am I not surprised?” which could suggest that it hasn’t always worked. 

It goes back to what I was saying- Marlon tried to get close to Violet and she never let him. She was difficult to be around after the twins died due to her grief and Marlon struggled with that. 

When he finally comes clean, this is where the real shift happens with him and Violet. You can see the hatred burning on her face every time the camera pans over to her now that she’s felt betrayed by him and his actions. 

Right before Marlon dies, if you choose to say nothing, Violet will step forward and start saying that he doesn’t get to stay, but gets cut off when AJ shoots him. 

All in all, Violet is a big case against Marlon and a showcase of how far his manipulation as gone within Ericson.

[Marlon’s office and foreshadowing of motivations]

“Whenever someone goes outside the safe zone, bad shit happens. People die or disappear. I just... I could really use the help, Clementine. Taking care of these kids, it's not easy. I'm worried that if I don't figure something out, if...if I don't fix our food situation... I can't lose anyone else. We've already lost so much. Friends, siblings... I can't let another kid die. It could break us.”

Swinging back around, let’s talk about the rest of the scene in the office. 

First off- it’s implied that Marlon uses the office as a bedroom given the mattress on the floor and some of his personal belongs laying about. Like the photo he keeps of him and Louis. 

The bed isn’t for Rosie, we assume, since we later see her sleeping outside while chained up. This might be just because they wanted Rosie present for the confrontation scene but didn’t want her loose, so they put her outside when you’d think that she’d sleep inside with everyone else. 

Or, maybe she just prefers to be outside when the weather’s nice, or they keep her as a guard in case something were to happen, that way she can alarm them. 

Anyway, why does Marlon potentially sleep in his office rather than in a dorm? Or does he have a dorm that he’ll sleep in, but keeps the mattress there just in case? 

Well, a show of authority, for one. Even if he does keep a dorm room, it’s likely that he made the office his own as a way to be like “The headmaster is gone, this is my office now. I’m in charge.” 

Which makes sense. 

And when you think about what Louis tells us about Marlon having all these sleepless nights and tough calls, it’s not hard to imagine him spending late nights in his chair going over different plans and stressing over the food situation/safe zone, as well as letting the guilt of the twins weigh on him to the point were he’s too exhausted to even leave.

Moving on to the actual conversation between him and Clementine. He does show a vulnerable side to her, which I like. He can feel the pressure he’s under and sense the loss he’s suffered. But...like before, looking at this knowing what I know, it’s not hard to see certain things in a different light opposed to what you’d see as a new player.

What’s interesting, though, is while I do enjoy this conversation and the bits of insight it gives to Marlon’s character, there is this subtle, slightly off undertone of the whole scene after the Rosie bit. 

At this point, we’ve talked with Aasim and he’s planted the seed of doubt.

We’ve heard the story about the twins. Violet came and talked to us about it, we could visit their graves and learn that they died at this time last year. Anyone who has played any game or heard any story can pick up on that the twins are important. They’re not going to use these girls as some throw away lines. They’re going to come back one way or another. 

We’re literally living in their dorm. The dorm that Marlon put us in. They’re heavily connected to Tenn and Violet, two important characters I previously discussed. Then, Violet comes barging into our room and talks about them some more. 

It makes the gears turn, y’know? 

And with Marlon being very insistent that they stay in the safe zone, it’s not hard to question the story about the twins. I went through and skimmed a couple play throughs on youtube to this scene and a lot of them were theorizing that the twins weren’t actually dead or something wasn’t right, some cracks are starting to show. Why else bring it up? Marlon being the one to push the dangers of the safe zone and everything with Aasim... it’s not hard to pick up that he might be hiding something.  

The thing I find fascinating about people’s perception of Marlon is how they interpret his motivations when it comes to Clementine and AJ, and that can be tracked back to this scene. 

We all know that he’s planning on giving them to the raiders if they come back. It’s a hard fact. Brody warned us before she died, and dialogue during the basement scene backs it up. 

But the question I’m curious about is... when did this motivation begin? 

When did Marlon decide that he would give Clementine and AJ to the raiders if they ever came back? 

Because the text doesn’t tell us anything until Brody’s death, I feel like we all have a different moment where we believe that became Marlon’s secret motive, y’know? 

In all my digging, I’ve read posts about this idea, people giving their thoughts on when they think Marlon secretly turned on us, or if he was ever really on our side. 

One has people theorizing that Marlon saved Clementine and AJ with the intention of giving them away from the beginning. 

So he saw taking these two in and earning their trust as an opportunity to save everyone else at the school [the people he cares about] rather than have to sacrifice anyone else like they did with the twins. Clementine and AJ were just a means to an end if the raiders came back. 

Which is a rather sinister way to look at it and puts quite a negative spin on Marlon’s actions towards them - like how he’s willing to let them stay at the school not out of kindness but out of bad intentions, and every kind thing he ever did was to win over their trust so he could lure them out into the woods and do a trade if necessary. 

The line “Take this. I don't want you gettin' lost.” gets pointed at a lot due to how Marlon says it, the infliction of it, and it’s theorized that the hidden meaning behind it is “Take this, if you get lost then I can’t make the trade.”

Same thing with “Just remember to stay in the safe zone. We need you to come back home in one piece.”

Which isn’t a wrong interpretation of this. You can totally look at this conversation between Marlon and Clementine as Marlon subtly foreshadowing his turn, or betrayal, at the end of the episode.  

“...It's how we've kept ourselves from unwanted attention for so long. Well... For the most part, anyway.”

“I can't lose anyone else. We've already lost so much. Friends, siblings... I can't let another kid die. It could break us. Sorry. I'm just... There's a lot of pressure.” 

“What, did you think I was gonna throw you out?“

Then there are the middle ground people who believe Marlon didn’t save Clementine and AJ with that intention in mind, but it started to appear as an option to him either a bit before or during the office scene. Y’know, it came as a passing thought that ended up lingering until he acknowledged it as a solution to a potential problem. 

Again, pointing at the dialogue from before- him suggesting that he’ll do whatever it takes to keep his community alive... just like he did before. 

And while he gets along with Clementine and AJ [or as some would suggest, he appears to be friendly], they’re not his family. He isn’t close to them the same way he is the rest of the school. and if he has to give anyone away, it’s going to be them, whether he wants to or not. 

Marlon didn’t want to give Sophie and Minerva away, and he’s carried that with him up until this point. We see it manifest to a breaking point that lead to Brody’s death and, eventually, his own. 

Finally, there are the people who believe that the idea of giving Clementine and AJ away didn’t occur to him until after the incident with Abel. After Brody panicked and told him about getting robbed, then Clementine claiming they met a man with different colored eyes who wanted food, and the realization that the raiders could be back. 

This is where I personally stand when it comes to this idea. I believe that Marlon didn’t decide on this until he heard about Abel, and solidified it during the fight with Brody down in the basement. 

But what about the dialogue in this scene that potentially has double meanings? Well, I believe that’s the writers suggesting Marlon’s turn and motivations rather than Marlon himself, if that makes sense. Like I said before, you could take nearly everything Marlon says as some sort of foreshadowing or suggestion of what happened to the twins, what his true intentions are with Clementine and AJ, and what will happen to him at the end of the episode. 

That’s the thing- Marlon doesn’t ever go on a mustache-twirling monologue about how he knew he could use Clementine and AJ as trade if the raiders came back and that’s the real reason why he saved them, nor do we see him come up with the idea on the spot. 

Hell, Marlon never admits to the player that he was going to do that. The most he says is, “Shut your fucking mouth! I made the right call. I saved the lives of everyone in this fucking school! If they came back... I'd do it again!”  

Brody is the one who told us everything, and every time Clementine throws it back in his face, he tells her to shut up and threatens her with the gun. 

But from what I’ve tried to gather about what Marlon and Brody talk about in the basement before Clementine gets down there...

Marlon: “Why can't you just do what I ask you to do?”

Brody: “Because we caused all this, and now we have to deal with it!”

Marlon: “I am dealing with it!”

Brody: “By tradin' more of us away? That's not fixin' the problem, that's runnin' away from it!”

[I’ll come back to this full conversation later when I go over the basement scene by itself. It gets pretty dark.]

Which.... yeah. So, I’m not trying to say Brody was lying or anything just because Marlon never flat out admitted it to us the player, I’m just saying that we don’t know for sure when he made up his mind about this since the game never gives a clear suggestion for the sake of his dramatic turn from friend to antagonist. 

Did he have this idea from the start or did he come up with it during this conversation? 

We don’t know, but it’s interesting to look at the different views surrounding this question and how it applies to Marlon’s character. Because yeah, if you truly believe that Marlon had this intention from the start, it makes all of his actions in this episode pretty scummy. And again, that’s not wrong because there isn’t an answer here. 

I choose to believe that maybe the idea came as an unwanted thought in the beginning, but manifested into something real when he heard about Abel. He shared his plan with Brody, who didn’t want to go along with it. 

And y’know what... let’s finally get into the basement scene and Brody...

Continued in Part 2/2

[heloflor]

Rogue arc : An analysis of “Abducting Murphy’s law” ’s B plot

So, as I mentioned in one of my fics, I wanted to write a long ass thing about Cavendish’s arc in season 2. Well, here’s part one!

While I said that I wanted to talk about the arc, to be honest I mostly had this episode in mind. “Abducting Murphy’s Law” is not my favorite episode but it does have my favorite B plot (by B plot I mean Cavendish and Dakota). The reason why I love this plot so much is because there’s tons of stuff to talk about, hence this post. So yeah, when I said I wanted to talk about Cavendish’s arc, what I mostly meant was that I wanted to infodump about this episode. Although, I did make a second post about how the reconciliation didn’t feel earned, along with some comments about the arc in general, including how Dakota definitely has some dependance issues but, instead of addressing it, the show tends to validate his fears. I’ll make sure to post both parts around the same time so that, if anybody wants to add or talk about it, they already have all my arguments.

This first half will be in four parts : a short explanation of which scenes I will talk about, one small side note about Bob Block being the least trustable character in this show, one pretty long part about how Dakota is throughout the episode and finally another long part about Cavendish and his evolution during the episode. And yeah, I know I could’ve made the Bob Block part into its own post but for some reason my brain really wants to put it in this post so…

And because I don’t want people to scroll through such a long text to read a tl;dr , here it is now :

tl;dr : - Bob Block is an untrustworthy condescending creep.

- Dakota plays moral support and does seem to believe Cavendish but is mostly worried about what Cavendish is trying to do and is gently trying to get him to give up while trying to stay on his side, as if something like that happened before.

- Cavendish is desperate to prove himself and the world that he’s someone, so when nobody takes him seriously or believe him, he’s willing to take matter into his own hands to prove them wrong.

 As for the full post (warning : it’s VERY long) :

So first off, I will talk about four scenes here : the scene on the parking lot, the three scenes at P.I.G. (warning Block, the computer room and the argument in the armory) and the scene with Cavendish leaving. So basically, every scene with the duo except for the dialogue between Dakota and Heinz, mostly because there isn’t really anything interesting to say about this scene, except maybe the fact that Dakota drowns his sorrows in food but that was pretty much expected given his personality and the fact that he literally says in “Missing Milo” that he eats when he’s stressed. Also, leave it to Doofenshmirtz to be vague about why Milo was missing, making it impossible for Dakota to know that there truly was an abduction; just like how in “The Last Day of Summer” in PnF, when he asks Candace if she saw his nemesis, he conveniently doesn’t describe Perry to her.

As for the small part about Bob Block : I don’t trust that guy in the slightest. Firstly, like basically everyone who watched the show already said, this guy gives off a very creepy vibe that makes him scream “villain”. And his design with his teeth + the voice actor’s former roles doesn’t help. Also, I recently re-watched the B plot of “Milo’s Shadow” and Cavendish calls P.I.G. a “clandestine government agency”, and I’m a bit curious about the “clandestine” part.

Secondly, I’ve seen a few people say that Block was hiding something darker because he was “too nice to be a good person” but like…he isn’t nice ??? Not in the slightest ??? Haven’t you heard him talk to Cavendish and Dakota in episodes like “Disco Do-Over”, “Lady Krillers” or “Field of Screams” ? He’s extremely condescending to them. Seriously, he talks to them like they were toddlers. Like, you know that “baby voice” you take to make kids feel excited about something ? He uses the exact same kind of voice with Cav and Vinnie. And the fact that he speaks slowly or him killing aliens while telling Cav that he’s doing the important job doesn’t help with the condescending aspect.

Another thing that I noticed about him is that he tends to be in control of every discussion he’s a part of. In particular, he has a tendency to cut off Dakota when the two are talking. I don’t know why Dakota specifically but in my rewatchs I didn’t notice him do the same with Cavendish. And since we’re on the topic of him being condescending and cutting off : first, in “Walker, Runner, Screamer”, he hangs up on Cavendish without listening to him and secondly and most importantly, in “Parks and Wreck”, not only does he cut Dakota again but he also goes from “I’m 100% listening to what you want to tell me” to “Sorry I’m too busy” in like 5 seconds. Bob Block doesn’t care about them. He isn’t being nice. He’s a condescending ass who borderline gaslight them by pretending to be nice.

Another thing that I’d like to discuss about him is the fact that I’m seriously doubting that he’s related to Mr. Block, which is not reassuring because it would mean that he somehow learned about time travel and time agents etc. But yeah, about the relation with Block : Thing is, Mr. Block is at the head of B.O.T.T. and one of the judges of whatever their court system is. So in other words, he knows about the rules better than anyone. And while he does seem a bit immature at times and in canon went back in time to watch a movie he missed, I don’t feel like going back to meet his ancestors is something he’ll do ? I mean, we know that “don’t cross your own timeline” is a pretty big rule for time agents, and in “A Christmas Peril”, Block seems genuinely surprised to see his future self, which makes me think that he doesn’t do this kind of time-travel much. Also, if he’s willing to go back in time to meet his ancestors, why doesn’t he go back to buy pistachios ? So yeah, I know this is all speculation and for all I know he could have gone back in the past but there’s just something about his character and the situation that makes me go “would he tho ?”.

Also, while I completely agree that it can be possible, I’m a bit surprised about the fact that the family managed to keep the same last name for over 120 years. Like, did every generation had sons ? I know it’s entirely possible but would it happen here ? Or were there daughters who kept their last name after getting married ? Did Block really go back in time to meet his ancestors, leading to them wishing to keep the last name ? As for the physical appearance, aside from the hair, they don’t really have anything in common but it’s expected given the number of years between the two.

One last thing about Bob Block : In “Abducting Murphy’s Law” (you know, the episode that’s supposed to be the main focus of this post), there’s that moment with the character “Toodles” and I genuinely wished I had something to say about this moment, especially with the “I need to look like I’m going somewhere” line but I have no idea how to interpret it (and it’s frustrating honestly). So yeah, this line is here and it’s weird but I don’t know what to do about it.

  Now, onto the actual episode (this will be cut in different parts to make it easier on the read, especially for those who wish to read it but can’t take it all at once. So yes, this post is literally an actual essay) :

I. Dakota’s side

1. Emotional support

So in the first two scenes, Dakota does what he always does. I’ve mentioned it in this long-ass post but when Cavendish gets frustrated or angry, Dakota has a tendency to act more laid-back and chill as a counterpoint. I think a good example of that is at the end of “Walker, Runner, Screamer”.

During the entire episode, Dakota looks annoyed or unhappy and yet, in that scene, he’s suddenly smiling. And it’s something that he does throughout the entire show, as if it was his way of “soothing” Cav. And in “Abducting Murphy’s Law”, that’s what he does at first. If you notice, when Cavendish gets angry after Block’s call and throw that metallic pick-up thing on the ground, Dakota closes his eyes for a good second. And when he reopens them, he starts talking about his lunch, going back into his laid-back role as if to try calming Cav down. This is also what he does after his rant a few seconds later, when he immediately offers food to Cavendish after said rant.

And speaking of that rant, I have a few things to say about it. First off, I do believe that Cavendish needed to hear that. Yes, it hurt his feelings, but given what happens during the rest of the episode, it does feel like Cavendish needs a reality check. Also reminder that this is the man who spent years dying ever so often; and on the island, some Dakotas look older than the one we follow in the show. So you’d think that after knowing about all these deaths, he’ll try to be at least a bit more careful. So yeah, while Dakota could’ve phrased things differently, I feel like this is something Cavendish needed to hear at some point.

Secondly, I can understand why Dakota would rant like that. Ever since the beginning of season 2, Cavendish has been complaining about his new job, ever more than the pistachios mission (for which Dakota also didn’t seem really satisfied, given how he easily follows through with Cavendish in “Time Out” and how he complains at the beginning of “Perchance to Sleepwalk”.). And when Cavendish complains, there are a few times like in “Disco Do-Over” or “Walker, Runner, Screamer” in which Dakota doesn’t seem to be very happy having to deal with Cavendish’s mood. Also, keep in mind that we see the duo like every three episodes and that just because they aren’t on screen doesn’t mean that they aren’t working. So for at least a month, given how each “show season” takes place during an “earth season” (if that makes sense), Dakota had to deal with working a shit job with someone who’s constantly complaining about it.

I’d also like to point out that, in “Backwards to School Night”, the line about Dakota not wearing much on Sundays and Cavendish not knowing about it hints that they don’t live together in the future. So that “constant roommates” situation could be new to them; and given how little they probably earn, it’s understandable that they’d rather keep this small “apartment” and share rent rather than splitting to go live in a different place each. In other words, Dakota doesn’t really have much choice but to live with Cavendish and hear him talk about saving the world everyday. Given all that, I’m honestly not that surprised that Dakota ended up snapping and giving Cav a piece of his mind. His patience was bound to run out at one point.

Side note : I’m not saying that Dakota is an easy person to live with compared to Cavendish. Honestly, they probably argued about money at some point due to Dakota’s eating habits and the fact that neither of them seems to know how to cook, so they have to eat out every day. I’m just saying that Cavendish is seen always complaining about his job and Dakota most likely hears him complain much more than we do. And no matter how much you like someone, hearing them say the same things over and over again get tiring. And besides, the argument could work in the opposite direction too. Maybe Cav is tired of Dakota never taking everything seriously; but much like Dakota, he can’t just buy his own place and live alone easily.

 Thirdly, I’d like to comment on this face :

Two things to say about this face. First, the most obvious, he’s sad for Cavendish. If the whole “being chill when Cav is angry” is any indicator, Dakota doesn’t like seeing Cavendish be sad or miserable. Besides, this guy didn’t spend years saving Cavendish and trying to always be by his side just to destroy his self-esteem later on.

Secondly, I can’t help but feel like Dakota is also thinking of his own emotions here. As said before, Dakota isn’t very happy with his new job either, as we clearly see in “Walker, Runner, Screamer” (I swear mentioning this episode is turning into a drinking game). While he’s still cheerful from time to time, he went from having a lazy smile as a resting face in season 1 to having a more neutral or tired expression.

But at the same time, Dakota doesn’t really express his frustrations, most likely because Cavendish is much more vocal than him and he’d rather help Cavendish with his emotions than work on his own, like a “you have enough frustration for the both of us” kind of way. After all, we see in season 1 that he tends to shut down and keep to himself, which led to all his frustration in the argument of “A Christmas Peril”, since he wasn’t able to tell Cav why his lack of consideration was making him so angry, especially when Cavendish calls him selfish.

So here, it feels like Dakota isn’t just feeling shitty because Cavendish feels shitty but he’s also dropping his mask and showing more of his emotions, here the fact that he isn’t happy about his current life either. But unlike Cavendish, he’s able to go with the flow and find some contentment in the smaller things.

 Now, about the scene at P.I.G.’s office : For the “support” part, there isn’t that much to say. When Block turns Cavendish down and the guy starts feeling bad, Dakota goes back to his supporting role. In a way, he’s acting like in season 1. Except that this isn’t season 1 and he can’t time-travel anymore. So when Cav starts talking about breaking the rules and risking their jobs, Dakota immediately considers his words a mistake and try to stop Cavendish from thinking too much about it.

  2. Opposition

So I’m going to cover a part of the last two scenes at P.I.G. . First off, the scene in the computer room. At the beginning, Dakota seems still pretty encouraging with how he reminds Cavendish of what he said about what the ship looks like. But quickly, he starts to make Cavendish doubt himself.

What’s really interesting though is Dakota’s phrasing. When he starts talking to Cav, he says “Maaayybe I suppose but are you really sure you saw what you saw ? I mean…” and then goes on with the reasons why Cavendish might have imagined it. But about that quote, what I find interesting is the amount of incertitude he puts there with the “maybe”, “I suppose”, “are you sure”. It really feels like Dakota is trying to discourage Cavendish from looking for the ship while at the same time trying to stay on his good side by doubting him but not too much. This actually makes me wonder if such a situation happened before, hence why Dakota tries to stay on Cav’s good side.

Side note : “This isn’t my running tracksuit, this is my eating tracksuit!”, he says as if his tracksuits weren’t all eating tracksuits.

 Then there’s the scene in the armory. First off, this face :

He keeps that same expression throughout the entire moment, both when watching Cavendish and the guard, and I don’t know how to interpret it, which is frustrating. My best guess is that Cavendish seems in better spirits, which reassures him or something like that. Or maybe the fact that Cavendish still wants to hang out with him to try finding the ship makes him think that Cavendish won’t ghost him. Really, I don’t see why he would smile like that only to start being frustrated again ten seconds later.

As for the argument in the armory; here I’m not going to talk about the main parts of the argument but a few things that Dakota says. Firstly, he again seems to try being on Cavendish’s good side with him saying “I believe that you believe”, though this isn’t enough to convince Cavendish. He also says “maybe we shouldn’t touch those” (not a direct quote) instead of just saying “we can’t touch those” or something like that. So again, he’s more into the “maybe you’re right maybe you’re wrong” area of the argument.

Secondly, I find the line “We’re stuck here. We live here now” really interesting. Like for at the beginning of the episode, this seems like Dakota showing more of his feelings. The way he says “we’re stuck here” first before catching himself and saying “we live here” shows again that he’s not happy with his current situation. Heck, it also means that he’s not just unhappy about the job but also being forced to live in a different time period than his, given that he says “stuck”. So yeah, he’s not happy about the situation and tries to hide it to make Balth his priority.

 Thirdly, there’s this expression when he leaves the room and tries to follow Cavendish :

(He looks like a kicked puppy I’m-)

So, when Cavendish leaves the room, he leaves behind an angry Dakota. And yet, barely a few seconds later, we see Dakota trying to follow Cav and his expression is filled with worry. This again makes me think that such a situation happened before, which would be why Dakota is so worried about not being at Cavendish’s side. Like, maybe at some point they had a mission that resulted in a terrible argument and Cavendish ended up trying to solve things alone, only to get injured or even die or something like that. And if something like that happened, that could explain why Dakota is now trying to convince Cavendish to stop looking for the ship without putting Cavendish against him and why he would look so worried when he realizes that he’s losing the battle; especially given how he can’t time-travel now. But again, this is all a complete speculation here. We have no concrete proof that such a thing happened before.

And since we’re on the topic of Dakota trying to be gentle in his approach : I’d argue that Dakota actually believes Cavendish when he says that he saw a ship. This is due to four reasons :

- They’ve been time-travelers for a while and probably saw a lot (just the “milk to death line”. Whatever this is, Dakota saw some shit.); the same way they met aliens a few episodes before this one. So seeing a spaceship wouldn’t be the most surprising thing in the world (Heck, P.I.G. literally has a computer showing all kind of ships they discovered; also the duo once went on the moon given the montage in “Island of the Lost Dakotas”).

- When they’re talking to Bob Block, the boss asks Dakota if he saw the abduction, and while Dakota says no, he starts saying “But if he says he saw it” before getting interrupted by Block.

- In the armory, when Dakota says “I didn’t saw what you saw but I believe that you believe and that’s” before getting interrupted. This line kind of gives off the impression that he does believe in Cavendish and so believe that Cav saw a ship. Though the “I believe that you believe” can definitely be seen as him not really believing him, just like with Cavendish saying “it’s like saying ‘I believe you’re hallucinating’ “

- In the scene when Cavendish leaves, Dakota says “I’m sorry I didn’t believe you in the way that you wanted me to.”. The fact that he adds the “in the way that you wanted me to” again gives the impression that he does think that Cavendish saw a spaceship. It’s just that Cav expects more than just a “I believe that you saw it”.

So overall, there’s the possibility that Dakota does believe in Cavendish. Honestly, the only thing that seems odd is the fact that Dakota doesn’t want to go and try to save the abductee. Though, given the fact that they’re risking their jobs and given the possibility of such a situation happening before, paired with Dakota’s fears for Cavendish’s life and the fact that he can’t time travel anymore, meaning that all of his actions have consequences; I guess it does make sense to some extent that Dakota doesn’t want to save the abductee. He worries more about Cavendish being alive and safe, especially now that he can’t go back. However, I’ll admit that the way Dakota just brushes off the possibility of someone being abducted and in danger does feel out of character. Although, watching “The Substitute” again, the two did leave the classroom without trying to do anything to help the kids against the blob; so honestly I don’t know.

This all leads us to the last part for Dakota :

3. The evolution throughout the scenes

So as I said, Dakota starts off trying to be supportive of Cavendish by being reassuring, but as Cav starts to be more and more absorbed by the idea of proving the ship exists, Dakota starts to distance himself from him by trying to convince him to stop looking. And then comes the last scene, in which all Dakota can do is try to convince Cavendish to stay with him.

Honestly, thinking about this scene, it feels like Dakota already knows that he lost the fight. When he asks “you say that sarcastically ?”, he just sounds tired. Also, there’s how his way of talking changes in the episode. At first, in the computer room, he tries to use facts to convince Cav to stop looking for the ship, talking about how there was some sunlight or how Cavendish got worked up. Then, during the argument on the armory, it’s kind of the same, although the facts that he gives are much more personal this time around with how he mentions that it’s a question of how their actions now have consequences and he can’t just fool around anymore.

Then, during the last scene at the “apartment”, he doesn’t even try to argue about the ship aside from his apology. Instead, he mentions his partnership with Cav and how they’re always able to talk things through, which actually reminds me of how in the scenes when they’re in private they act differently than in public, making it seem like they do communicate quite a lot by dropping their defenses around each other and vent to each other. Heck, the way Dakota says in this episode “We talk it out, we’re a team” really gives off the impression that yes, Cavendish and Dakota do talk things out when they have a big argument. And that’s what Dakota wants to do in this scene. He just wants the two of them to sit down and talk it out; no more running away, no more argument.

But yeah, in this scene, it’s not about the ship. It’s about Cavendish staying with him. And honestly, it feels like something that can be applied to how Dakota is throughout the entire episode. All he seems to care about is if Cavendish is going to stay with him or ghost him. Again, it kinds of falls into the idea that a similar situation happened before.

One last thing that I’ve written down is the fact that Dakota sutters while trying to convince Cav to stay in that last scene. But after watching a few of the previous episodes, Dakota actually has a tendency to sutter when he gets anxious or nervous. As a few examples : the ending of “A World Without Milo” at the beginning of his talk with Elliot, the crossover episode when Cav learns about the island, several scenes in “Escape” (Dakota’s such a mess in this episode).

 So that’s all for my breakthrough of Dakota’s part in this episode. Overall, he seems like he just wants to be with Cavendish, and for some reason seems to believe him while at the same time not trying anything to help the abductee. He’s protective, most likely due to the trauma of seeing Cavendish die over and over again for years. In short, that man has some issues that the show should really consider mentioning if season 3 comes around. But I will discuss more about these issues in my second post on the topic.

Now, onto Cavendish :

II. Cavendish’s side

1. Insecurities and evolution before this episode

So let me get this out of the way first : Cavendish is a very insecure guy, and what happened in “Abducting Murphy’s Law” was bound to happen at some point. We see glimpses of it in “Time Out” and “Abducting Murphy’s Law” seems to revolve around it : Cavendish is a guy who seems to have a pretty low self-esteem and who tries to hide it in his way to act all professional and “know-it-all/all-mighty”. We see it in how easily he gets sad in “Time Out” when realizing that his job barely matters, and we also see it when he’s in private with how soft he becomes. Just look at how, at the beginning of the Halloween special, he very easily agrees to follow Dakota’s plan and only calls Dakota a “meanie” for steaking stuff, which contrasts with his “Doughty snackhound” from “We’re Going to the Zoo”. He also shows his anxiety in “Snow Way Out” and is very soft and calming in “Perchance to Sleepwalk”.

So yeah, his attitude outside is more of an act than anything, though I’m not denying that he also gets grumpy because that’s a side of his personality (I wish I had any artistic talent so I could draw Cavendish with John Mulaney’s “When I walk down the street, I need everybody, all day long, to like me so much. It’s exhausting !”, including John talking about his wife after this line).

So all this to say that Cavendish is insecure. And because of those insecurities, he feels the need to prove himself. He wants to be a hero, he wants to feel like a hero, but he also wants others to see him as a hero. Again, “Time Out” shows it well with how quickly he gets obsessed at the possibility of a counter-agent working against him, nevermind the fact that it’s a literal child.

And we see it even more in season 2. Every episode, he complains about how shitty his life became and how unfair it is. In particular, there’s the episode “Free Fall”, his last appearance before “Abducting Murphy’s Law”. In “Free Fall”, he seems even more fed up than usual about his job, and when a drone attacks him, he’s immediately happy that someone, anyone, noticed him. The ending of this episode actually makes me feel sad for him. He’s just so desperate for something good to finally happen to him; and he does deserve better than that. It’s just sad.

It also feels like he’s starting to distance himself from Dakota during the first half of season 2. By that, I mean that they don’t have as much interactions as they did in season 1, which was full of their banter (which is what made them so entertaining to watch). Heck, in “Milo’s Shadow”, Cavendish is shown alone, without Dakota. And in this episode, Cav tries to tell others about the aliens and get some people concerned about it.

Also, he clearly tries to impress the others when telling his story, even if he doesn’t consider them much. As for the other episodes, Cavendish and Dakota are mostly concerned over their mission and as such aren’t seen interact much, aside from like the beginning of “Lady Krillers”; which is a bit of a shame considering how their interactions are the best thing about their plot (but I already have another post ready that talks about season 2 and its issues so I won’t rant about it here).

So in short, Cavendish is desperate for good things to happen to him. He’s desperate to prove himself, he’s desperate to have other people take him seriously for once, he’s desperate to have a better life than that. During the first half of the season, it feels like this is what they were trying to show. And it all culminates in “Abducting Murphy’s Law”.

2. His evolution throughout the episode

So I’m going to do one big part here, going scene by scene.

Parking-lot scene :

So, in the first scene, Cavendish is the same as in previous episodes. He’s not satisfied with his job and wishes for more, in particular recognition for his previous actions in season 1. He’s (rightfully honestly) having a hard time accepting that this is all he gets, and when Dakota gives him a reality check, it only makes him feel worse.

Then there’s the encounter with Scott. This one’s pretty interesting. Alright so first off, it seems that Cavendish considered what both Dakota and Scott told him and decided to try and stop sulking, trying to see a more positive side of his situation. Though, it’s very interesting how he says “but how ?” right before seeing the UFO. In a way, it also really shows the difference of mentality between him and Dakota. Dakota has accepted that this is all he’ll get, and while he’s not happy about it, he decides to try seeing the good in smaller things. Cavendish on the other hand doesn’t seem to be able to do the same. Heck, when Dakota does it at the beginning of the episode, Cavendish sees it as Dakota lacking ambition; which in itself isn’t actually wrong since Dakota really doesn’t seem to want much from life aside from having fun and being with Cav.

Then, there’s also the line “Loss can lead to new adventures”. What I love about this is how, when we start the episode, the “loss” is more about how Cav is feeling. I mean, even Cavendish says that he needs to stop sulking after hearing this sentence. But then we watch the end of the episode and suddenly “Loss can lead to new adventures” has a brand-new meaning. And ouch. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love it, but still, ouch. Though, to be honest, I do wonder if at some point during the episode, Cavendish realized that “loss” could also mean leaving Dakota behind. Honestly tho if Cavendish repeated the sentence during the separation it would have been some amazing angst. But I’m getting off-topic.

Afterwards, there’s the abduction. When Cav sees it, he reacts exactly like he did at the end of “Time Out” and “Free Fall” : he gets excited and touchy, ignoring what Dakota says as he’s too taken from seeing this as a new opportunity to prove himself worthy of a better life. Thinking about it, it’s actually both funny and sad how he seems to care more about people seeing the ship and promoting him than the fact that someone was straight-up kidnapped by aliens (what’s up with Cavendish and Dakota not caring about people’s lives in this episode ? Though, given how they were in early season 1, I guess they just don’t care for the people they don’t know, do they ?).

Though, Cavendish mostly thinking about a promotion does fit his character. Again, he’s now desperate for recognition. In the spun of the moment, it isn’t about someone getting abducted, it’s about him being a hero again.

One last thing that I want to mention, mostly because I don’t really know where to put it otherwise : some scenery regarding Cavendish and Dakota at the end of the scenes. Every single scene with the two of them in this episode ends with Cavendish leaving the frame without Dakota, with Dakota trying to follow him in the first and second scene. Then, starting with the computer room scene, Dakota is left behind, the first time by his own volition as he’s starting to be less and less able to follow with Cavendish’s mindset and get angry about it, then left behind because Cavendish is too far gone into his ideas and prevents Dakota to stay with him, no matter how much Dakota tries to follow him, desperate to set things right. That’s all I have to say about how the characters move into the frames, but I found that to be a very interesting detail.

  The P.I.G. desks + the computer room scenes :

Like for Dakota, I don’t have much to say about the second scene. Bob Block doesn’t believe Cavendish in the slightest (and is being a condescending smartass about it; god I hate this guy. He’s great as a character but my god I hate him as a person) and it leaves Cavendish sad and disappointed. But then, Dakota tries to cheer him up, which only prompts Cavendish to try acting against his boss’ wishes. It’s like I said earlier : they have the same mentality as in season 1 in which ignoring the rules had little to no consequences aside from a slap on the wrist, leading them to do what they wanted.

But here, this isn’t season 1 and their actions have consequences. Dakota had realized that and tries to call Cavendish off his goal, but Cavendish is too excited to listen to him. This is the same structure as “School Dance” or “The Little Engine that Couldn’t” in which Cavendish gets his mind set on something. And in these two episodes, Dakota simply follows him without complaining. Heck, in “School Dance”, when the kids confront them about the whole “vampire” business and say “We know what you’re up to”, Dakota replies “Really ? Cause I barely know” which shows that, in this episode, he basically blindly follows Cavendish around, not caring enough about his job to object when Cav wants to do something that goes against what their boss want.

So, because of how they were in season 1, Cavendish is used to act when his mind is set on something. And he’s also used to have Dakota follow him, which might explain why he sounds like he’s taking Dakota’s objections in this scene like a joke. After all, Dakota always let him have his way, even when he disagreed with it. So why should it be different this time around ?

In a way, Cavendish has a certain disconnect, not really realizing the consequences of his actions. I guess that may be due to his previous job or the fact that, with Dakota secretly protecting him all the time, it never occurred to him how badly things can turn out.

One last thing for this scene, about the dialogue with Block and Cav mentioning the need to save the abductee : it’s again a bit unclear whether Cavendish wants to save them because they’re a person in danger or if he’s only thinking about people discovering that he was right and making him a hero. Though, looking back at his facial expression, he does seem genuinely concerned for the person (and I’m actually starting to wonder how he would’ve reacted had he known that the abductee was Milo).

As for the computer scene, again, not much to say. It’s Cavendish focusing on the task he wants to accomplish while Dakota’s just there to be there. Again, we see Cavendish be too obsessed with his task to pay mind to Dakota’s objections. We also see him get irritated when Dakota objects, though not as much as later on, as if he could tell that Dakota wasn’t truly believing him but at the same time thinks that Dakota will keep following and supporting him.

Side note : Seeing Cavendish knowing how to use a computer feels really weird. Like, I know he’s from the future so obviously he knows how technology works without any problem, but this is a guy who walks around with an 1850s outfit and who keeps using outdated expressions. So seeing him use a computer just doesn’t feel right.

The armory scene :

Now we get into the juicy part.

Alright so first off, a side note : “I am a naughty boy !” Cavendish, buddy, please don’t ever say something like that again ! Although it’s pretty adorable to see that dork feeling like such a gangster after “breaking” one rule (I mean, he was allowed in by the guard so it’s not really breaking the rules).

Secondly, like in the first scene at the beginning of the episode, when talking about saving the abductee, he seems more focused on the fact that he’s a hero who needs to save the world. It really gives off the impression that he doesn’t care that much about what happened to this person. He just wants validation and uses the current circumstances to do so. Again, this is just sad (I swear making this analysis is starting to make me feel really bad for Balth).

Thirdly, the line “Come on, partner !”. At first, I thought Cavendish was trying to convince Dakota to help him by reminding him of how close they are. But thinking about it again, I can’t help but see it as Cavendish trying to convince himself that Dakota will help him. I mean, he definitely noticed that Dakota wasn’t ok with what he was doing, no matter how oblivious he seems to be to Dakota’s objections. But up until now, Dakota had a tendency to just shrug it off and follow. So seeing him be so insistent now may have made Cav realize that maybe Dakota won’t follow through this time. So he tries to convince himself that Dakota will come through for him, because they’re partners.

Fourthly, the argument itself. When Dakota starts to interject more seriously, Cavendish reminds him of the obvious : that, when they were time-travelers, Dakota couldn’t care less about the rules. But things are different for them now, actions have consequences, and Cavendish doesn’t seem to truly grasp that. Heck, after Dakota argues that they have responsibilities to keep, Cavendish immediately points the finger at him with the “You don’t believe me” line, which completely changes the direction of the argument. Seriously, Dakota was talking about how they needed to follow the rules to survive in this new time-period and Cavendish starts talking about something that has nothing to do with what Dakota just said. Although, given that these two have known each other for at least like 10 years or so, given how much Cav changed from his design in “First Impressions”, I guess him changing the topic like that might be due to him knowing Dakota well enough to understand that, when Dakota objects to him like that, it’s because there’s a lack of trust there.

As for the rest of the argument, I guess this is mostly Cavendish’s desperation and obsession that are speaking. I mean, Cavendish is never taken seriously by anyone aside from Dakota. So here, when Dakota doesn’t support him like he expected him to, this is probably the last straw for him. He isn’t willing to listen to Dakota’s excuses, cutting him mid-sentence. And if Dakota’s face is any indicator, he can clearly tell that Cav doesn’t want to listen and that he’s losing the battle.

Cavendish has made up his mind. He knows what he saw, he knows that aliens are on earth, kidnapping people; and if nobody, not even Dakota, is willing to listen to him, then he’ll have to prove them all himself, no matter the cost.

  The ‘leaving’ scene :

Then comes the last scene, with Cavendish packing his bags. Again, he isn’t willing to listen to Dakota. He made up his mind and he’s determined to find the UFO. As he says it himself when Dakota tries to apologize : “It’s too late for that”.

Though, as I’ve seen mentioned in a fic that was basically an analysis of that last scene, we do have Cavendish leave a teddy bear behind. The bear wasn’t on the couch when he was packing, so it’s likely that he felt genuinely bad for ditching Dakota and decided to leave a plush behind to keep him company.

Also, a thing that I keep bringing up in my fics : I truly don’t think that Cavendish wanted to leave forever. I mean, he probably only took the essentials in the bag he used; he probably has much more than that stuff. Also, I highly doubt that he would wish to never see Dakota again. Heck, in “Escape”, when they reunite, Cavendish is pretty nonchalant about the whole thing, as if he expected to see Dakota again. Overall, it’s more that he thinks that Dakota’s going to try to stop him or slow him down since he doesn’t really believe in him, so he wants to do this rescue alone.

And one last thing regarding Dakota : the whole “It’s safer for you to stay here”. I find this line really interesting. Because thing is, no it’s not safer. Cavendish doesn’t go alone to protect Dakota, he does it to prove a point, to prove that he’s right and everyone else is wrong. But thing is, Cav already has some pretty low self-esteem, and accepting the fact that he’s being selfish by leaving wouldn’t help with it. Also, as I’ve mentioned in my long-ass “fun facts about these two” post, when Cavendish is in a situation that’s possibly dangerous, his first reflex is almost always to worry about Dakota’s well-being. So, in my interpretation, Cavendish knows that he’s being selfish by leaving like that and ghosting Dakota, so he tries to tell himself to leave by convincing himself that he’s leaving the guy behind to protect him; because there’s nothing more important to him than Dakota’s safety, so it’s much easier on the mind to tell himself that he’s doing it for Dakota.

  Aaaand that’s pretty much all for this analysis, which is already a lot to take in (12 pages. This entire post is 12 pages long. 11 without the pictures).

Thanks for reading !

[lizacstuff]

Hello, Liza! I hope you are doing well. Passing by because I (and everyone else I think) would like to know your thoughts about episode 25. I watch this show trying my best to avoid spoilers but today somehow I ended up seeing everything. Twitter was and still is mad about the episode and I thought I was going to have the same reaction as them. Surprise, surprise, I didn't which left me speechless. I feel like you might have the same reaction as me so I would love to know your thoughts! xo

Hello! I have a lot of asks and rather than flooding my dash, I think I’ll put them all in one place, so this is going to get very long.  I have mixed feelings. I didn’t hate it, but it was a hard episode to watch.

I wish I had seen the reaction before I watched, then I would have adjusted my expectations. The whole time I was waiting for a twist at the end that didn’t come. Partly because of my own speculation, but partly because I’d watch the live with Hande and Kerem and from the translations, Kerem said there was a shock at the end and called the ending beautiful. Never trust Kerem! LMAO. Not because he would ever intentionally mislead, but boyfriend never remembers anything that happens in any episode. Though he was right about the shock, just not about it being beautiful. (Prince be crazy!) Anyway I kept hoping for the twist of them working together and fooling everyone and it didn’t come. 

So I was disappointed at the end, but with adjusted expectations the episode, taken for what it is, is actually decent and I can definitely get onboard with Eda sacrificing everything to save him. That’s very romantic and they did a great job of setting up how devastated she was and how serious the threat is from Babaanne. Eda did not crumble in the face of a couple of idle threats. No, every moment that Eda waited to break up with him, Babaanne introduced some very real and catastrophic consequence to Serkan or his family. Shit got real and Eda was pushed into a no-win corner and needed to act fast. I’ll talk about that more, but first, I’ll mention a couple of thoughts about the writing and the new writers:

(more under the cut)

Good

Structure - The structure of the episode was a lot better than last week.  Scenes actually made sense one after the other, the emotions of the characters were consistent and it all flowed. 

Plot - I’m not necessarily praising what happened in the episode, more that there was one. And it’s one that will not be forgotten in the next episode and it feels like this plot could sustain a number of episodes which his necessary if the show is to continue.

Characterizations  - The characters felt true to what we’ve watched the last 20+ episodes. As I said above, work went into showing us both Eda and Serkan’s mindset and how that led to the ultimate outcome. It’s impressive that they put together one of the most heartbreaking breakup scenes I’ve seen, and the characters weren’t actually even together. 

Not-so-good

Proposal dream - I’m not a big fan of fooling the audience like this, and I’m really not a big fan of putting it in a teaser or promo. That is a bait and switch, and I think it’s a cheap trick for the production company to have featured it in the fragman. Badly done.  In next week’s fragman we see Serkan “punching” the Prince, I fear that is not real, possibly Serkan’s fantasy, and I’m really hoping that “fake scenes” are not going to be the go-to for these new writers. We’ve already spent 50+ hours with Eda and Serkan, we don’t need to see imaginary things, we need real scenes. No fake outs at this juncture. 

Humor and ‘sparkle’ - I think this is what’s going to be missing from the new writer’s scripts. They tried really hard with the game night at the newlywed’s house and Chef Alexander love triangle, (Team Aydan all the way, Ayfer can fuck off. If she doesn’t care about her niece’s happiness, then she shouldn’t get any herself) but it just didn’t get there comedy wise. Ayse really had a way of pulling together very funny scenarios and making everything sparkle, and I’ll miss that. 

Lack of Edser - This is their show, they are the ONLY reason most people watch. You can’t build a plot that separates them. When Serkan broke up with Eda they were able to build a scenario where they were still thrown together all of the time, and kept finding excuses to be with the other. Their screen time didn’t suffer that much. I’m not sure this scenario will allow the same with him being at risk if Babaanne spots them together.  However, for this episode I’m willing to give the benefit of the doubt as @jan31​ brought up to me, Kerem and Hande were very busy last week with rehearsals and then shooting The Voice, so that might have contributed to why there was so much focus on the other characters this ep, they needed to release the leads for other commitments. 

hawaiigirl84 said: So I'm on a SCK Facebook group looking at a lot of irate fans. If you haven't seen the episode yet, I think you're going to have to gird your loins for this one.

@hawaiigirl84 Haha. I wish I’d seen this ask so I could have adjusted expectations. I went on twitter last night and then backed away slowly. Lots of dramatic rending of garments and gnashing of teeth.  You know the fan reaction is bad when both the producer Asena and Nesliyan (Aydan) tweeted out reassurances about the journey to love and then this morning the production company twitter account released video of Eda kissing Serkan in the jail. Trying to feed the fans who were out for blood, I’d guess. 

Anonymous said: Okay so the latest episode of SCK had to be the show creating a very low point for Eda & Serkan in order to build them back up, right? My thought after the episode ended was that things honestly could not get worse. That episode was just disappointing. While I get why Eda did what she did I still absolutely hated it and was pissed the writers could not come up with something better. And how heartbreaking was it to realize the proposal scene was a dream 😭. And now they released a clip showing Eda did kiss Serkan in the jail cell but they decided to cut it out? I get that the show has to create drama but the promotion of the episode as being super romantic was certainly a gut punch. The fragman has me hopefully that Eda & Serkan might finally work together to bring down Grandma or at least Eda will let him in on her plan. I will say even though that episode hurt the actors were absolutely killing it.

Are we the same person?? I think I went through all of these thoughts/emotions since watching, lmao.  

And 100% they are taking Eda and Serkan to their low point before building them back up. Also, think about it, after this they will both have a much better understanding of one another. Eda will understand how he could have made the decision to breakup rather than confide in her, and Serkan will understand why doing what he did hurt her so much and why it wasn’t easy for her to get over it. They’ll both have experienced the situation from all sides.  Ultimately, this will make them stronger.

Honestly, Eda has a LOT better reason to do what she’s doing than Serkan did. As I said above, Evil!Granny is not playing. She is deadly serious and seems to be capable of anything. In the course of 48 hours she had manufactured charges against Serkan that were serious and landed him in jail, she caused him to lose the tender they’d won which would have huge ripple affects for the business, and she was able to set up Alptekin and get him thrown in jail. At this point I could see her ordering a hit! Eda needed to call her off and get her to stop or who the heck knows would have happened to Serkan, Aydan and the business in the next 24 hours. Eda needed to move fast and she needed to be convincing. 

Right now I think Eda is just buying time, so Serkan is safe while she tries to fight her grandmother.  No way she’s rolling over. Not Eda. I’m still very hopeful that Serkan will figure out what she’s up to sooner rather than later and they will start to work together. 

Also, YES, to the performances. The actors were stellar. Hande and Kerem both brought it. I physically felt their pain.

Anonymous said: I'm completely convinced that the writers' room for this last episode wrote it without any knowledge of ep 24 except for the fact that it ended with Serkan getting arrested on NYE. Like I still wouldn't like it, but if we had gone from ep 23 to ep 25, it would make more sense. But not after ep 24. Did Ayse just say "fuck it" while writing that episode and gave the fans everything she could knowing full well what the other writers' plans were? Talk about some severe whiplash.

I don’t know what the background is on the writer change, but I don’t think this is fair.  I got whiplash from the fragman (proposal) to the episode, but not from ep 24 to this one. When watching ep 24 didn’t you think it was just a matter of time before the other shoe dropped? I thought that it was obvious that a dark cloud was gathering, just as Eda was willing to start fresh with him. Babaanne directly threatened Serkan several times to Eda. She told Eda she would destroy Serkan if she found they were together.  Episode 24 was Eda being defiant and letting herself be with Serkan and this episode was the consequences of that.  

There are things to criticize, but I completely disagree with you that this is one.

Anonymous said: I think Eda didn't say ily at that time because she must have already thought about maybe accepting what her grandmother had asked for. It would have been weird if she told him I love you and then broke up with him right afterwards. It wasn't the right time, I think the writers are saving it for a big confession like in episode 11. At least for now we could hear her say it in her dream.

Agreed on the timing, and you’re right about the dream. While I am annoyed they put it in the trailer, in the narrative it did serve to tell us exactly where Eda’s head is at in regards to their relationship.  She loves Serkan, she wants to marry Serkan.  So we know beyond a shadow of a doubt, that none of her actions are because of any lingering “confusion,” right now she is acting out of pure love for him. That’s beautiful. (maybe that’s what Kerem meant by the ending being beautiful, lmao) 

Anonymous said: Eda really breaking him by called what they had a mistake and threwing him the parents death in his face like it was his fault, he doesn’t deserve all this. At least im happy serkan walked away first! although he loves her with all his being, he's fed up with Eda behaviour... if she really wants him, she has to fight for him.

Oh boy. 

You understand that Eda didn’t mean anything she said, right?  That the only way for her to convince Serkan she was serious was to bring out the big guns, and that she only did it to save him?

Yes, that was hard to watch. My heart absolutely breaks for Serkan. Actually, it breaks for both of them.  But it’s supposed to, they are in love, and Babaanne is tearing them apart. Did you watch Eda all episode? She was devastated the entire time. That’s one of the reasons this ep was hard to watch. It’s hard to see a beloved character be at that low of a point for 2 straight hours.  

This storyline will be easier for you to watch if you reframe this from applauding Serkan for being “fed up” at Eda, to Eda loving him so much that she is going to do whatever is necessary to save him.  She sacrificed and now she’s going to risk it all fighting Babaanne, and all of it is for LOVE. 

Anonymous said: The ending is so ridiculous, and let's not even talk about the fragman of the next episode I really don't know if I want to continue watching

Okay, you’ve just hit my pet peeve. DO NOT come into my inbox with flounce threats. I don’t care if you watch or not. If you’re done, fine, move on, no need to announce it on anon or add it to any of my posts. Because why even talk about something you’re not going to watch? If you’re not serious, but just saying that cause you’re throwing a temper tantrum and think that you can bring about change that way or think you’re making a point by threatening to withhold your support, I’m not going to validate you. You’re being manipulative and all you’re doing is trying to make other people feel bad.  Anyone else who does this will be blocked.  

Anonymous said:  The new writers are really destroying the series. Eda blamed serkan for not telling her the truth and now she did exactly the same. They're ruining eda's character by doing that. Eda wouldn’t have ever, nor left herself be defeated like this by babaanne, nor used the words she did with Serkan, it was beyond mean, and unnecessary for this plot, im so upset

Dude, pull yourself together. It’s not that bad. The new writers are definitely evolving the series, if feels like it’s going to be more plot driven, than situational, but I think that had to happen if they were going to continue making episodes. Maybe you believe they should just end it, and that’s a fine opinion to have, but if it’s to continue, and I personally want it to, there needs to be a plot, there needs to be a big obstacle and this is what these writers’ have chosen.   

Out of all the thing they could have done, it’s actually a good direction to go. Once again, they’ve chosen to separate them, not because one betrayed the other. Not because of some third-party love interest. Not because one is uncertain about their feelings. Not because one of them made a bad choice that hurt the other. They’re separated because of something that happened when they were children, something completely out of their control.  And Eda made the decision she did, because she loves him more than anything. 

For drama in a romantic story its about as good as you can hope for. Because despite your knee-jerk, overly emotional take, the reality is there is nothing here that taints either character or their love for one another. 

They are NOT ruining Eda’s character.  Eda was pushed into a corner and she made a hasty decision to save the man she loves. Babaanne was watching her constantly, she was having her followed. Eda did what was necessary to get Serkan out of jail and then to stop Babaanne’s relentless, and successful, attacks against him.  She said what she said, because that’s the only thing that would have convinced him she was for real. Anything else he wouldn’t have believed, and if he didn’t believe it then Babaanne wouldn’t have stopped. Also, Eda hasn’t let herself be defeated. She did what she needed to do, so she can keep Serkan safe while she fights. This is just one battle, Babaanne won’t win the war. 

They’ll get to the point when they’re fighting her together, but we’re getting this part first. The part that will give both of them greater insight into the other, and the perspective they both need to truly understand how each felt during the first break up. And it will give us angst and longing and pining and jealousy and all sorts of things. 

Also, curious, why is it okay for Serkan to break her heart because he was afraid of her reaction to the truth of the past, but it’s not okay for Eda to break his heart to save him from huge and real threats to his safety, livelihood, freedom and family?

Anonymous said: I am so sad for serkan he doesn't deserve this. Eda ended up abandoning him like everyone else who comes into his life. The worst thing about it is that he knew it was going to happen and he was afraid it would happen and it did happen 😭

It’s definitely gut-wrenching. Serkan doesn’t deserve this, but neither did Eda. And Eda didn’t abandon him because she wanted to, she did it because very bad things were happening and she had to act quickly.

However, think about what you just said: he knew it was going to happen. It’s also not like the consequences of going against Babaanne are unknown to him.  He knows he was thrown in jail, he knows his dad is in jail, he knows there were serious threats to his business. So what that means is that it won’t take Serkan long to figure out that Babaanne is behind everything and Eda is 100% acting out of love for him.  

He will just need to shake off the sting of her words, and the haze of heartbreak and he’ll see that she did it for him. 

[silent-era-of-cinema]

Hans Walter Conrad Veidt (22 January 1893 – 3 April 1943) was a German actor best remembered for his roles in the films Different from the Others (1919), The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920), and The Man Who Laughs (1928). After a successful career in German silent films, where he was one of the best-paid stars of UFA, he and his new Jewish wife Ilona Prager were forced to leave Germany in 1933 after the Nazis came to power. The couple settled in Britain, where he took British citizenship in 1939. He appeared in many British films, including The Thief of Bagdad (1940), before emigrating to the United States around 1941, which led to his being cast as Major Strasser in Casablanca (1942).

Hans Walter Conrad Veidt was born in his parents' home at Tieckstraße 39 in Berlin to Amalie Marie (née Gohtz) and Philipp Heinrich Veidt, a former military man turned civil servant. Veidt would later recall, “Like many fathers, he was affectionately autocratic in his home life, strict, idealistic. He was almost fanatically conservative.” By contrast, Amalie was sensitive and nurturing. Veidt was nicknamed 'Connie' by his family and friends. His family was Lutheran, and Veidt was confirmed in a ceremony at the Protestant Evangelical Church in Alt-Schöneberg, Berlin on 5 March 1908. Veidt's only sibling, an older brother named Karl, died in 1900 of scarlet fever at the age of 9. The family spent their summers in Potsdam.

Two years after Karl's death, Veidt's father fell ill and required heart surgery. Knowing that the family could not afford to pay the lofty fee that accompanied the surgery, the doctor charged only what the family could comfortably pay. Impressed by the surgeon's skill and kindness, Veidt vowed to "model my life on the man that saved my father's life" and he wished to become a surgeon. His hopes for a medical career were thwarted, though, when in 1912 he graduated without a diploma and ranked 13th out of 13 pupils and became discouraged over the amount of study necessary for him to qualify for medical school.

A new career path for Veidt opened up in 1911 during a school Christmas play in which he delivered a long prologue before the curtain rose. The play was badly received, and the audience was heard to mutter, "Too bad the others didn't do as well as Veidt." Veidt began to study all of the actors he could and wanted to pursue a career in acting, much to the disappointment of his father, who called actors 'gypsys' and 'outcasts'.

With the money he raised from odd jobs and the allowance his mother gave him, Veidt began attending Berlin's many theaters. He loitered outside of the Deutsches Theater after every performance, waiting for the actors and hoping to be mistaken for one. In the late summer of 1912 he met a theater porter who introduced him to actor Albert Blumenreich, who agreed to give Veidt acting lessons for six marks. He took ten lessons from him before auditioning for Max Reinhardt, reciting Goethe's Faust. During Veidt's audition, Reinhardt looked out of the window the entire time. He offered Veidt a contract as an extra for one season's work, from September 1913 to August 1914 with a pay of 50 marks a month. During this time, he played bit parts as spear carriers and soldiers. His mother attended almost every performance. His contract with the Deutsches Theater was renewed for a second season, but by this time World War I had begun, and on 28 December 1914, Veidt enlisted in the army.

In 1915, he was sent to the Eastern Front as a non-commissioned officer and took part in the Battle of Warsaw. He contracted jaundice and pneumonia, and had to be evacuated to a hospital on the Baltic Sea. While recuperating, he received a letter from his girlfriend Lucie Mannheim, telling him that she had found work at the Front Theatre in Libau. Intrigued, Veidt applied for the theatre as well. As his condition had not improved, the army allowed him to join the theatre so that he could entertain the troops. While performing at the theatre, his relationship with Mannheim ended. In late 1916, he was re-examined by the Army and deemed unfit for service; he was given a full discharge on 10 January 1917. Veidt returned to Berlin where he was readmitted to the Deutsches Theater. There, he played a small part as a priest that got him his first rave review, the reviewer hoping that "God would keep Veidt from the films." or "God save him from the cinema!"

From 1917 until his death, Veidt appeared in more than 100 films. One of his earliest performances was as the murderous somnambulist Cesare in director Robert Wiene's The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920), a classic of German Expressionist cinema, with Werner Krauss and Lil Dagover. His starring role in The Man Who Laughs (1928), as a disfigured circus performer whose face is cut into a permanent grin, provided the (visual) inspiration for the Batman villain the Joker. Veidt starred in other silent horror films such as The Hands of Orlac (1924), also directed by Robert Wiene, The Student of Prague (1926) and Waxworks (1924), in which he played Ivan the Terrible. Veidt also appeared in Magnus Hirschfeld's film Anders als die Andern (Different from the Others, 1919), one of the earliest films to sympathetically portray homosexuality, although the characters in it do not end up happily. He had a leading role in Germany's first talking picture, Das Land ohne Frauen (Land Without Women, 1929).

He moved to Hollywood in the late 1920s and made a few films there, but the advent of talking pictures and his difficulty with speaking English led him to return to Germany. During this period, he lent his expertise to tutoring aspiring performers, one of whom was the later American character actress Lisa Golm.

Veidt fervently opposed the Nazi regime and later donated a major portion of his personal fortune to Britain to assist in the war effort. Soon after the Nazi Party took power in Germany, by March 1933, Joseph Goebbels was purging the film industry of anti-Nazi sympathizers and Jews, and so in April 1933, a week after Veidt's marriage to Ilona Prager, a Jewish woman, the couple emigrated to Britain before any action could be taken against either of them.

Goebbels had imposed a "racial questionnaire" in which everyone employed in the German film industry had to declare their "race" to continue to work. When Veidt was filling in the questionnaire, he answered the question about what his Rasse (race) was by writing that he was a Jude (Jew). Veidt was not Jewish, but his wife was Jewish, and Veidt would not renounce the woman he loved. Additionally, Veidt, who was opposed to antisemitism, wanted to show solidarity with the German Jewish community, who were in the process of being stripped of their rights as German citizens in the spring of 1933. As one of Germany's most prominent actors, Veidt had been informed that if he were prepared to divorce his wife and declare his support for the new regime, he could continue to act in Germany. Several other leading actors who had been opposed to the Nazis before 1933 switched allegiances. In answering the questionnaire by stating he was a Jew, Veidt rendered himself unemployable in Germany, but stated this sacrifice was worth it as there was nothing in the world that would compel him to break with his wife. Upon hearing about what Veidt had done, Goebbels remarked that he would never act in Germany again.

After arriving in Britain, Veidt perfected his English and starred in the title roles of the original anti-Nazi versions of The Wandering Jew (1933) and Jew Süss (1934), the latter film was directed by the exiled German-born director Lothar Mendes and produced by Michael Balcon for Gaumont-British. He naturalised as a British subject on 25 February 1939. By this point multi-lingual, Veidt made films both in French with expatriate French directors and in English, including three of his best-known roles for British director Michael Powell in The Spy in Black (1939), Contraband (1940) and The Thief of Bagdad (1940).

By 1941, he and Ilona had settled in Hollywood to assist in the British effort in making American films that might persuade the then-neutral and still isolationist US to join the war against the Nazis, who at that time controlled all of continental Europe and were bombing the United Kingdom. Before leaving the United Kingdom, Veidt gave his life savings to the British government to help finance the war effort. Realizing that Hollywood would most likely typecast him in Nazi roles, he had his contract mandate that they must always be villains.

He starred in a few films, such as George Cukor's A Woman's Face (1941) where he received billing under Joan Crawford's and Nazi Agent (1942), in which he had a dual role as both an aristocratic German Nazi spy and the man's twin brother, an anti-Nazi American. His best-known Hollywood role was as the sinister Major Heinrich Strasser in Casablanca (1942), a film which began pre-production before the United States entered World War II. Commenting about this well-received role, Veidt noted that it was an ironical twist of that that he was praised "for portraying the kind of character who had forced him to leave his homeland".

Veidt enjoyed sports, gardening, swimming, golfing, classical music, and reading fiction and nonfiction (including occultism; Veidt once considered himself a powerful medium). He was afraid of heights and flying, and disliked interviews and wearing ties.

In a September 1941 interview with Silver Screen, Veidt said,

I see a man who was once for years studying occult things. The science of occult things. I had the feeling there must be – something else. There are things in our world we cannot trace. I wanted to trace them. The power we have to think, to move, to speak, to feel – is it electricity, I wanted to know? Is it magnetism? Is it the heart? Is it the blood? When the body dies, where is all that? Where is the power that made the body live? No one can tell me it is not somewhere. If you believe in waves, which you must believe after you have the radio, why couldn't human beings contact the wave lengths of someone who is dead? ... this is the kind of thing with which I was, for many years, preoccupied. This is what I tried to find, the answer. I did not find it. But in looking for it there was etched, perhaps, on my face, some hint of the strange cabals I kept with unseen and unknown powers. I did not find it, I say. But I found something else. Something better. I found –faith. I found the ability, very peaceful, to accept that which I could neither see, nor hear nor touch. I am a religious man. My belief is that if we could help to make all people a little more religious, we would do a great lot. If we would pray more ... we forget to pray except when we are in a mess. That is too bad. I believe in prayer. Because when we pray, we always pray for something good.

He went on:

I must tell you something that will disappoint you ... far from being one engaged in strangle rituals of thought or action, what I like best to do is sit in this small garden, on this terrace, and – just sit. Sometimes, I confess, I think a lot; about my past. About my parents who are dead. I like to dream, to go away ... At other times, I sit and read. I read, often, a whole day through. I play golf. I used to be a golf fiend. Now I am not a fiend even on the links. Now I play because it is relaxation. I like the beach very much, the sea. I go to the films often, to the neighborhood theater, my wife and I. Sometimes we go to the Palladium, where there is dancing. It is an amazing sight to me to see young people, how they are like they were thirty years ago, how they hold hands, how they enjoy their lives. To me, the most beautiful thing in California is the Hollywood Bowl, the Concerts Under the Stars. For me, it is a terrific experience. I have never seen an audience in my life like that. 30,000 people, simple people, most of them, listening to music under the stars. I have never seen 30,000 people, simple people, so quiet. I like to think of them as a symbol that one day there may be that oneness for all mankind....

On 18 June 1918, Veidt married Gussy Holl, a cabaret entertainer. They had first met at a party in March 1918, and Conrad described her to friends as "very lovely, tall, dignified and somewhat aloof". They separated in 1919 but attempted to reconcile multiple times. Holl and Veidt divorced in 1922.

Veidt said of Holl, "She was as perfect as any wife could be. But I had not learnt how to be a proper husband." and, "I was elated by my success in my work, but shattered over my mother's death, and miserable about the way my marriage seemed to be foundering. And one day when my wife was away, I walked out of the house, and out of her life, trying to escape from something I could put no name to."

After his separation and eventual divorce from Holl, Veidt allegedly dated his co-star Anita Berber.

Veidt's second wife Felizitas Radke was from an aristocratic Austrian family. They met at a party in December 1922 or at a Charleston dance competition in 1923. Radke divorced her husband for him, and they married in April 1923. Their daughter, Vera Viola Maria, nicknamed "Kiki", was born on 10 August 1925. He was not present at her birth due to being in Italy working on The Fiddler of Florence, but upon hearing of her birth, he took the first train to Berlin and flailed and wept as he first met mother and child at the hospital; he was so hysterical from joy they had to sedate him and keep him in the hospital overnight.

Emil Jannings was Viola's godfather and Elisabeth Bergner was her godmother. She was named after one of Bergner's signature characters, Shakespeare's Viola. The birth of his daughter helped Veidt move on from the death of his dearly loved mother, who had died of a heart condition in January 1922.

From September 1926 to 1929 Veidt lived with his wife and daughter in a Spanish-style house in Beverly Hills.

Veidt enjoyed relaxing and playing with his daughter in their home, and enjoyed the company of the immigrant community, including F. W. Murnau, Carl Laemmle, and Greta Garbo, as well as the American Gary Cooper. The family returned to Germany in 1929, and moved several times afterwards, including a temporary relocation to Vienna, Austria, while Veidt participated in a theatrical tour of the continent.

Radke and Veidt divorced in 1932, with Radke citing that the frequent relocations and the separations necessitated by Veidt's acting schedule frayed their marriage. Radke at first granted custody of their daughter to Veidt, but after further consideration he decided that their daughter needed the full-time parent that his work would not allow him to be. Conrad received generous visitation rights, and Viola called her summer vacations with her father "The Happy Times". She stayed with him three or four months of the year until the outbreak of World War II.

He last married Ilona "Lilli" Barta Prager (or Preger), a Hungarian Jew, in Berlin on 30 March 1933; they remained together until his death. The two had met at a club in Berlin. Veidt said of Lilli in an October 1934 interview with The Sunday Dispatch,

Lilli was the woman I had been seeking all my life. For her I was the man. In Lilli I found the miracle of a woman who had all to give that I sought, the perfect crystallisation in one lovely human being, of all my years of searching. Lilli had the mother complex too. But in the reverse ratio to mine. In her, the mother instinct was so powerful that she poured it out, indiscriminately almost, on everyone she knew. She mothers her own mother. Meeting Lilli was like coming home to an enchanted place one had always dreamed of, but never thought to reach. For her it was the same. Our marriage is not only flawless, it is a complete and logical union, as inevitable as daybreak after night, as harmonious and right as the words that exactly fit the music. My search is finished. The picture in my mind of my mother is of a woman great and holy. But it is a picture clear and. distinct, a deep and humble memory of a woman no one could replace; but now it is not blurred by the complex which before had harassed my mind.

Veidt and Lilli arrived from London at Los Angeles on 13 June 1940 and resided in Beverly Hills, where they lived at 617 North Camden Drive.

Even after leaving England, Veidt was concerned over the plight of children cooped up in London air raid shelters, and he decided to try to cheer up their holiday. Through his attorneys in London, Veidt donated enough money to purchase 2,000 one-pound tins of candy, 2,000 large packets of chocolate, and 1,000 wrapped envelopes containing presents of British currency. The gifts went to children of needy families in various air raid shelters in the London area during Christmas 1940. The air raid shelter marshal wrote back to Veidt thanking him for the gifts. Noting Veidt's unusual kindness, he stated in his letter to him, "It is significant to note that, as far as is known to me, you are the only member of the Theatrical Profession who had the thought to send Christmas presents to the London children."

Veidt smuggled his parents-in-law from Austria to neutral Switzerland, and in 1935 he managed to get the Nazi government to let his ex-wife Radke and their daughter move to Switzerland. He also offered to help Felizita's mother, Frau Radke, of whom he was fond, leave Germany. However, she declined. A proud, strong-willed woman who was attached to her home country, she declared that "no damned little Austrian Nazi corporal" was going to make her leave her home. She reportedly survived the war, but none of the Veidts ever saw her again.

Veidt was bisexual and a feminist. In a 1941 interview he said,

There are two different kinds of men. There are the men men, what do you call them, the man's man, who likes men around, who prefers to talk with men, who says the female can never be impersonal, who takes the female lightly, as playthings. I do not see a man like that in my mirror. Perhaps, it is because I think the female and the male attract better than two men, that I prefer to talk with females. I do. I find it quite as stimulating and distinctly more comfortable. I have a theory about this – it all goes back to the mother complex. In every woman, the man who looks may find – his mother. The primary source of all his comfort. I think also that females have become too important just to play with. When men say the female cannot discuss impersonally, that is no longer so. When it is said that females cannot be geniuses, that is no longer so, either. The female is different from the male. Because she was born to be a mother. There is no doubt about that. But that does not mean that, in some cases, she is not also born a genius. Not all males are geniuses either. And among females today there are some very fine actresses, very fine; fine doctors, lawyers, even scientists and industrialists. I see no fault in any female when she wears slacks, smokes (unless it is on the street, one thing, the only thing, which I don't like), when she drives a car ... when men say things like "I bet it is a woman driving" if something is wrong with the car ahead – no, no. These are old, worn out prejudices, they do not belong in today.

In the 1930s, Veidt discovered that he had the same heart condition that his mother had died from. The condition was further aggravated by chain smoking, and Veidt took nitroglycerin tablets.

Veidt died of a massive heart attack on 3 April 1943 while playing golf at the Riviera Country Club in Los Angeles with singer Arthur Fields and his personal physician, Dr. Bergman, who pronounced him dead at the scene. He had suddenly gasped and fallen over after getting to the eighth hole. He was 50 years old. His ex-wife Felizitas and his daughter Viola found out about his death via a radio broadcast in Switzerland.

In 1998, his ashes, along with his wife Lilli's, were placed in a niche of the columbarium at the Golders Green Crematorium in north London.

[bellamyblake]

so I saw some posts in the bellarke tag (from a few bellarke) saying how season 6 bellarke was terrible and that Bellamy was out of character and would never do the things he did for Clarke that season.. and that he was bland, and the cpr scene could’ve been any sappy couple, but like ?? I loved season 6, and I thought Bellamy was in character (as opposed to season 5 where they barely interacted and had any big emotional talks after 6 years of thinking she’s dead and ugh s5 to me felt the least like them) i mean to me him doing anything for her seems like something Bellamy would do? Look at the all past seasons and all the sacrifices and thing he did for her and how protective he was over her for any little thing! I feel like Bellamy leaving everyone to save clarke would be something that would happen? And him basically in tears trying to save her as she’s dying in front of him pleading that he needs her seems in character and something they would do and it felt special and sweet to me :/ how was Bellamy bland for doing the most he can to save someone he loves?? Idk, s6 was one of my favorites for how actually romantic it was and it bums me out hearing some bellarkes hating it. How do you feel about it? Do most of the fandom think it’s ooc and Bellamy’s bland?

I think the most important fact to begin with here would be that you gotta understand something that was also a little hard for me to understand at first but that I learned fast when I got into the fandom and that is that-

Nobody judges Bellamy Blake more than his own fandom.

Literally.

I’m even gonna be as brave as to say that the pinapples might not even know what to put on his shoulders besides season 3 to blame him for every mistake but we can. We absolutely can say the worst things about him and call him anything.

You know back when I got in the fandom that was season 3 and that was the WORST time to join but haha, silly cute lil me, I knew of so many blogs and Bellamy and Bellarke fans who HATED Bellamy and refused to understand his actions which yes though questionable, were at least supposed to be put under the microscope and understood.

I knew people who hated season 2 Bellamy too which was such a surprise to me, those were mostly original season 1 fans who said that he was *too  herioc* in season 2 and it *doesn’t fit his character*.

So after that, like season 3 and everything (and after Bob explained how much was missed on and not told and the better part of the season which made some fans show some mercy towards his character), I decided myself that I’ll always step back, think over everything that happens to him with as clear of a head as I can and decide for myself. 

I kept doing it to the end which is also why I am the only one in the fandom who didn’t call him ooc in s7. But THAT is another subject.

I think what I mean here is that nobody and I believe that wholeheartedly is more rude or more brutal to Bellamy Blake than we are. I often felt like we as a fandom hated him more than any anti can and it broke my heart. Most of all what broke my heart was the blatant refusal to understand him or his actions.

I think after season 1 people just had this image of the bad boy rebel king with soft heart who lets Clarke and the 100 in and that was it and that still sells most to these days in fics and amongst the fandom. 

That’s literally where they stopped and they refused to add anything else to his multilayered character in their heads.

ANYWAY-

You asked about season 6 and I LOVE season 6 despite most bellarkers not being fans of it. I think here it comes again a lot to fandom and how the said old gen bellarkers refused to like season 6 bellarke because apparently it wasn’t written as well, the dialogue was bad, they kept recycling stuff, I’ve seen this over and over and over again but for me, personally season 6 was a whole ass trip from beginning to end that is just that-

a love story.

His love story to Clarke.

I think through it he manages to achieve in his heart what he never got to do for her in season 4 and season 5. I have had a few friends at the time who thankfully felt the same way and we discussed the fact that-

season six is filled with all the romantic tropes that we as bellarke writers (and old gen bellarke) KEEP WRITING but complain that we never actually had

WHICH WE DO????

but somehow it is not good enough for them. 

So to answer your quesiton, no, not all people in the fandom thought it was bad, but I feel like again as before with just bellamy and season 3 there was this PUSH as if on purpose, to hate this, to condemn it, to call it *not the same*. I understand what they say that yes they are not entirely the same people and here comes my next point-

THEY ARE NOT!

and newsflash-

THAT IS FINE.

I think a majority of the people refused to accept the fact that they grow as characters and they have layers added to them just as the story grew and went from one planet to another. I think not everyone can accept that and that is fine, I have no problem with that I just wish it wasn’t just so blatantly hated.

I personally think that the CPR scene is where they PEAKED in all aspects. THIS is the most they’ve been truly romantic I believe that and that it is actually expressed in the DESPERATION with which he saves her and her waking up and throwing herself in his arms. Also let’s not forget his lips touching hers which for us is like basically sex.

And after that scene came out I saw a lot of hate and I was so surprised, mainly on twitter from old bellarkers, fic writers who said LOL what a dumb scene, haha he can’t do CPR right and i was like WHAT-

WHAT-

WHAT-

COME AGAIN?

You were okay when she peckered his cheek for 0,02 secs and left him all the fuck alone in season 2 to deal with EVERYTHING and the kids but this is-

BAD FOR YOU?

HIm reccassitating her and begging her and crying and his own effing sister seeing his break down and then managing to get to her, to make her to pull through and her coming back and throwing herself in his arms IS BAD?

I mean I literally died there and it is still my favorite moment.

I know nobody would agree with this but I still think this is the best one. The hugs were great but at some point how many hugs can you have?

This was more. This was so much more and I loved it.

I think also there is something else when people call some scenes blind and that is that Bob was in a lot of pain filming that because of his injury. He literally couldn’t walk and had to redo some scenes from the beginning of the season back in the end when he was a little bit better so it is clear that it is very hard for him to do this but he still does his best imo and by the time the CPR scene comes he clearly is much better and it shows in his acting too (which is also why i personally love his acting in s7 it shows so much how when an actor takes care of themselves, takes a step back, recovers and comes back he literally crushes it but AGAIN i am a lone wolf in that aspect)

Anyway, here is my advice:

1.Stay out of the tags;

2. Find people who you enjoy seeing on your dash to follow and who do fit your interests in terms of the show.

3.Don’t read ppl’s opinions, frankly, don’t listen to anyone, not even me in that ask if it doesn’t sit right with you. Instead find your own thoughts and emotions. 

When I first got in the fandom there was so much meta and meta blogs and you dk the hate I saw in our fandom when it came to bellamy or the wrong discorse about his actions so I just unfollowed them all and did my own thinking. 

That’s what i advise you to do!

Thank you for your question, sorry for the length!

[365days365movies]

January 24, 2021: Speed Racer (Epilogue)

When it came out, Speed Racer wasn’t exactly criticially acclaimed. The Rotten Tomatoes summary for the critical response is as such:

Overloaded with headache-inducing special effects, Speed Racer finds the Wachowskis focused on visual thrills at the expense of a coherent storyline.

And, I mean:

Part of that criticism is understandable, let’s be honest. But how about the rest of it? Well...

Recap

Cast and Acting

I’ll be honest, Emile Hirsch is only OK as Speed Racer. I mean, he certainly isn’t bad, but I also can’t call him an acting dynamo in this one. This probably has to do with the writing and the direction, but he was still just fine; not much more than that. Christina Ricci, John Goodman, Susan Sarandon and Matthew Fox, on the other hand, all definitely take this very seriously, and pour some serious acting chops into their roles. Even Goodman, who as one point has to seriously say the word “non-ja” - yes, really - really gives it some fatherly energy that the role demands. Color me impressed! Roger Allam, too, deserves praise for REALLY pouring on that corporate supervillain energy, like he came right out of comic books. Like I said in the recap, he really channels Tim Curry-caliber acting here, and as over-the-top as that is, it’s fun to watch! Every other actor basically plays their roles as if they’re in a live-action cartoon. Which, to be fair, they are. So, for all of that, we’re going with a 7/10. Oh, and  Paulie Litt as Spritle? That kid is goddamn annoying...which is the point. So, yeah, pretty great job to him, I guess.

Plot and Writing

Plot’s about as typical as you can get for this kind of movie. Honestly, if you were to ask me to draft a Speed Racer film script, it’d probably exactly this movie. And...yeah, that’s entirely fine, I don’t really see any issues with it. Writing is silly at times, and rarely ever profound, but again: you kind of get what you pay for. For what they were given to work with, the Wachowskis (yes, they also wrote this bad boy) did fine. 6/10?

Directing and Action

...8/10. I-I can’t believe it, either. Yeah, um, the racing scenes, the shots, all of it? It’s stellar. This might be a living cartoon, but GODDAMN do they lean into that well. Nothing else to say here, the Wachowskis were clearly the right choice here. My only complaint is that I wish this movie was ENTIRELY in CGI, to be honest. I think the movie actually suffers from being in live-action at all. THat’s why this score isn’t perfect.

Production and Art Design

This one, however, is an unabashed 10/10. Because from the cars to the raceways, and even to the CGI stuff, this film looks AMAZING. IF, that is, you know how to look at it. Gotta say, after getting used to the technicolor bombast of this movie, those visuals got much less distracting, and I was able to actually focus on them. 

Music and Editing

This is a soundtrack I would buy. My biggest complaint with some of these adapted cartoon properties is the lack of iconic music you can find in them (LOOKIN’ AT YOU, BAYFORMERS), and the score absolutely uses the original song to its advantage, while also updating it to a satisfying instrumental. Nice one...MICHAEL GIACCHINO??? The Avengers and The Incredibles composer? THAT MICHAEL GIACCHINO??? No wonder I love the music here!

How about editing? Well...editing leaves something to be desired, sorry to say. Some of the distracting way these sequences are constructed is...less than stellar. Still, Zack Staenberg and Roger Barton did very well with the racing sequences, so it’s got some high highs, alongside its dismal lows. In other words, 7/10 overall here.

76%, and that sounds about right to me!

Is this my favorite racing movie or car movie? No, Mad Max Fury Road still has it beat there. Is this a movie I would watch again? Weirdly...yeah, yeah 100%, and with other people. This isn’t the best movie in the world, obviously, but I do agree that it’s underrated. It’s crazy, its bombastic (yes, I do love that word), it’s nonsensically seizure-inducing...and it’s somehow intriguing at the same time. Would watch again.

That’s it for cars! And we’re in the last week of Action January! Wow, that’s crazy. Can’t believe I’ve kept this up for this long, to be honest. So, how to send off this month? I already know the ending, but how to start? Well...I guess there’s one major subgenre I haven’t touched: disaster.

January 24, 2021: The Poseidon Adventure (1972)