#i don't think the people behind season 5 of stranger things were ever on my team but like whatever. at least this is for a good reason

[maddy-ferguson]

Yeah and since this doesnt only involve writers but also other production stuff, i wonder how theyre gonna start filming in may or june? Bec that would also be breaking the strike too... like idk how they are going to work around that. But anyway. My estimation is that the strike will at least take 3-4 months at the very least. So like. Yeah. 2025 release seems more likely bc the strike also involves other production staff

i can't lie to you i don't know shit about how american strikes in the entertainment industry work and i was a baby (6) and not american in 2007 but i mean yeah that season 5 is never seeing the light of day i fear

[itwasntimethatdidit40]

Hey there!

I wanted to post that for a while so, here we are.

Wondering who’s behind this blog?

Here’s something about me under the cut:

• I identify as a woman, my pronouns are she/her

• Born and raised in Italy, I still live there.

• I’m 141 LOL but according to people I still look like I’m in my 30s so let me indulge in that, thank you very much.

• I don't think there's anyone who makes me more feral than Joel Miller. I just can’t help it. My (un)holy Pedro characters triad is Joel, Oberyn and Peña 💕 (immediately followed by Frankie)

• I have a little elephant pendant that I always wear, no one knows what it's about *wink*

• I’m Leo Sun, Libra Rising and Aries Moon. You scared? I promise I don’t bite, unless explicitly requested 😏

• I’m Bi/Pan as fuck, always been obviously but I realized only last year. LOL, better late than never i guess. I only have problems with cisgender white males because I mean… they’re the worst, okay, I don’t make the rules.

• Single, unmarried, not interested in having kids even a little bit, I prefer to be the cool auntie.

• I love cooking and I'm quite good at it, I had good genes from my Italian grandmas 😌

• I can’t function without coffee, especially in the morning. I take my coffee bitter with just a little bit of milk.

• I can’t stand lies, the phrase “oh I didn't tell you so as not to make you suffer” (UGH, no you didn’t tell me ‘cause you’re a fucking coward and that’s it, my friend), misogyny, racism, fascism, homophobia, bi-erasure, any other form of verbal or physical violence towards LGBTQIA+ people, injustice in general, if you are any of the above you are not welcome here or in my life.

• I love dogs. I have a poodle named Brienne after the GOT character, she’s 5 years old so that means she got me through pandemic and she’s my love and joy. Isn’t she adorable? Yes, she is.

• I’m unfortunately allergic to cats (yep, like Pedro) and can’t pet them unless I wish for an asthma attack. That sucks, I know.

• I have deep brown curly hair, brown eyes and I’m short (158 cm).

• I have a lot of freckles, you could go on a treasure hunt following them.

• I’ve been to more than 100 concerts in my life including some festivals abroad.

• I currently listen to Hozier and Chappell Roan on a daily basis. I also love Billie Eilish, used to be a big Muse fan (listen, their first albums were great, okay) plus I’m a sucker for ‘90/‘00 music ‘cause that’s the music I grew up with.

• I love beer more than wine.

• I love reading, I used to read all the time, I have less time to do it now and it bothers me so much. I’m still reading fanfiction though. 🤭

• I’m a sucker for True Crime Podcasts, I only listen to Italian ones for now so unless you’re Italian you don’t know my faves and it’s a pity ‘cause they’re really good.

• Cults scare the shit out of me but at the same time they’re one of the things that makes me more curious ‘cause my mind can’t really comprehend what happens in people’s mind when they get sucked into them.

• Some tv series I love in no particular order: The Last of Us, Breaking Bad, Better Call Saul, Lost, The Handmaid’s Tale, Bojack Horseman, GOT (until seasons 7 & 8 happened 💀), Sense 8, Jane the Virgin, Grace and Frankie, Narcos, Only Murders in the building, The Bear, Succession, The Morning Show, Friends, Stranger Things (mostly because Jim Hopper is there, certainly not for those z*onists, you know), Mad Men, Gilmore Girls (Luke Danes *cough*), Mindhunter, Peaky Blinders (huge Tommy Shelby’s slut, don’t look at me like that, okay), My Brilliant Friend, The Affair, Black Mirror (until last seasons happened but it used to be one of the greatest things ever), The Walking Dead (got bored halfway through season 9, I recently started a rewatch and I hope to get to the very end of it lol), Fleabag, Normal People, When They See Us, Hill House, Bly Manor, Midnight Mass, Chernobyl.

• Films I love in no particular order: Parasite, Aftersun, Past Lives, All of Us Strangers, Brokeback Mountain, Almost Famous, The Goonies, Stand By Me, The Breakfast Club, The Killing of a Sacred Deer, The Lobster, The Neon Demon, Midsommar, One Day, When Harry Met Sally, There’s still tomorrow, Strange Way of Life, Prospect, The Banshess of Inisherin, Coco, The Emperor’s New Groove (so underrated), Mommy, The Virgin Suicides, Girls Interrupted, Saltburn, Promising Young Woman, Little Women (1994), Gone Girl, Shoplifters, Bin-Jip 3 Iron, Love Me If You Dare, The Piano, Fried Green Tomatoes, Notorious, Some like it Hot, Rear Window and you can ask for my Letterboxd account for more.

• Bad weather makes me sad and melancholy.

• I obviously love Italian cuisine with all my heart but I also love to try new dishes especially when I’m abroad. I love chocolate and I have a sweet tooth in general but there’s nothing I crave more than good carbs (I can be happy with a slice of good bread or focaccia). I love spicy food but I can't handle it when it’s very very spicy.

• I love bags, I have so many bags and I still want more lol

• When I was a kid I wanted to be a writer or a journalist. What do I do now? I’m a secretary LOL (I also have a second job not related to writing as well)

• As a friend, I’m loyal to the bone, I could do anything for you if I love you. If you betray me real bad though don’t expect a second chance, I mean I could try but I know i can’t ‘cause you’re changed forever in my eyes.

• I have so many kinks, you can ask if you want to know, okay. Also, so many authors here are responsible for giving me new ones. I love you deeply.

If you want to know more my asks and dm are open!

Here’s a little bit of me, byeeeee.

[seidenbros]

Holy Diver

Requests are open | prompt lists for inspiration | Stranger Things Masterlist

Summary: Staying at Rick's boathouse with Eddie, you try to pass the time, get something to eat and talk until you finally get word from the others, who'll be on their way to you with new supplies. Only that Jason and his guys beats them to it. Eddie manages to escape leaving you behind, which is not easy after what you'd seen happen to Patrick. At least the other ones find you again and you manage to track down Eddie, only to end up with him in the Upside Down after everything seems to go wrong.

Pairing: Eddie Munson x fem!Reader

Word count: 7722

Warning/Tags: angst, a bit of fluff & domesticity, canon-divergence (because y/n is part of season 4 now), hurt/comfort, canon-typical violence mentioned, scared and hurt Eddie, fear and panic, call it a fix-it-fic in the end (let me know if I missed anything)

Author’s note: Okay, we're right in the middle of season 4 now, and I think I went a little too much into detail, but couldn't help it. The words just flowed out. So I hope you'll enjoy this part, and if you have any suggestions, stuff I can improve, let me know. 💚

On AO3

Part 1: Promises | Part 2: Should I Stay or Should I Go | Part 3: Rainbow in the Dark | Part 4: Holy Diver | Part 5 - Bat out of Hell | Don't You (Forget About Me)

You were awake just a moment before Eddie, and he was still sleeping peacefully. None of you had woken up during the night, which just went to show how tired both of you had been. When he eventually woke, he wrapped his arm around you a little tighter, not wanting to let go.

“Mornin’,” he rasped against your stomach before he raised his head a little bit. He was caught in the moment, eyes fixed on you, soaking up the smile on your lips that he’d missed all these years. He might have seen it when you’d first stood in front of him again, but then he’d blown the whole thing by getting angry. Angry at you, at himself, angry at the world.Before he’d been able to meet with you again, all of… this had happened. 

“You’re real…” he said more to himself than to you, because he had to reassure himself. Therefore, he stopped hugging you close to him, let his fingers run over your sides, your hips, your thighs, back up to your face. His thumb brushed over your bottom lip. A sigh of relief left his own lips, but he needed to ask you something. “Please, tell me everything else was a dream!” He knew that it wasn’t, but he still had that last scrap of hope that he’d dreamed about all of it, that it was just some nightmare, that Chrissy was fine.

“I’m sorry Eddie, but I can’t tell you that…” As much as you wanted to, there was no point in lying to him. After all, you were holed up here because they were looking for him. Eddie's head dropped to your stomach again. Gentle fingers found their way into his hair, to the nape of his neck to hopefully calm him with your touches, and it worked. You felt the tension in his body ease, but only for a moment.

When you heard a car door, both of you jumped. You wanted to tell Eddie to hide beneath the blankets again, but he was already up, looking through the window to see who was out there. You’d just been able to crawl out of the boat when the door burst open. Clutching a hand to your heart, back against the wall, you saw the same four people from yesterday, who were holding up bags. You wanted to kiss them as much as you wanted to slap them for being so careless and scaring both you and Eddie.

“Next time, make yourself known before you barge in!” Your heart was still hammering in your chest, while Eddie looked a lot calmer than you. “I was this close to throwing whatever I could get my hands on at you.”

“Were we… interrupting something?” Robin looked from the boat to you, the hint of a smile on her lips, but you shook your head.

“Ne, we just woke up a moment ago. Just didn’t expect you this soon.”

While Eddie finally got some food - because he hadn’t eaten anything ever since he’d run away from his trailer - you sat down to talk to Robin. 

“How is he?” she asked quietly, nodding in Eddie’s direction. Your eyes landed on him as well for a moment, but then you focused on Robin again.

“He managed to sleep last night, so that’s good. Apart from that…” You shook your head. No need to say it out loud. All of you knew what had happened, how was he supposed to be feeling?

“And what about you?”

“Well…” You took a deep breath, glanced at Eddie who was stuffing his mouth with cereal. “I’m just glad I’m here, you know? Five years apart because of stupif coincidences, and I choose the worst time to come back into his life. Still…”

“It’s the time when he needs you the most.” Robin took your hand in his and gave it a gentle squeeze. You’d thought about it, whether all this might not have happened, if you hadn’t come here, had come sooner, but in the end, you had no way of knowing, and no amount of worrying, thinking about it, would change a thing.

Your attention was drawn towards Dustin when he spoke up. You’d thought so much that they were looking for him, convinced that Eddie had killed Chrissy. It was the easy way out, blame the one everyone called freak, even though it was hardly possible for Eddie to mutilate Chrissy like that. But they needed someone to make responsible for that, and that was Eddie. Soon the whole town would know, if Dustin and the others had already found out about it.

“Hunt the freak, right?” You heard Eddie say, and it broke your heart. You’d never considered him a freak, he just had interests that were different from most people here in Hawkins. In NYC, it was a completely different matter. Yes, there were still those that called people like Eddie freaks or looked at them like they were aliens, but there were more people like him, a bigger group.

When Dustin talked about finding and killing Vecna, you stepped up to Eddie, wanting to give him some support. In theory, Dustin was right, of course, but the reality was that it wasn’t easy. It wasn’t like you could snap your fingers and find Vecna dead in front of you.

“That’s all, Dustin… That’s all.” Eddie balled his fists out of frustration, but you were there to take his hands in yours, be a calm presence to him, even though your mind was reeling. The others had been through this before, they’d made it out alive again. Still, all of it sounded absolutely crazy, especially the things about the girl with superpowers, but you trusted them, you believed them, and as it seemed, Eddie did too. The problem was, that you needed a good plan, and fast. Especially when all of a sudden, you heard sirens outside.

Eddie went to hide immediately, but thankfully, they just drove by. All that still left you with a racing heart out of fear. The amount of police cars told you, though, that something must have happened, so the others decided to investigate, leaving you and Eddie behind, because you still didn’t want to leave him alone. Nobody should be alone in a situation like this. You promised to stay in contact via walkie talkie.

—

At one point, you peered out, making sure nobody was there, so that you could sneak into the main house. The others had done a good job with the supplies, but you needed some proper food - or as proper as was possible in your situation. Especially because you weren’t able to get any of the others on the walkie talkie, which only increased your worries. Yes, you’d said that you would try to communicate as little as possible, but no communication at all was freaking you out a bit. Still, you tried to keep as calm as possible, because it was enough that Eddie was freaking out.

“Coast is clear,” you said as you poked your head into the boathouse again, getting Eddie to come along with you. Both of you needed to use the bathroom as well as some food. You looked around and found something you could throw together. It wouldn’t be anything fancy, but it would at least fill your stomachs a little bit, and that was all that mattered right now.

While you were busy on the stove, warming up your meal, Eddie tried to reach Dustin, but there was no response. Up until now, he’d been pacing around, but then he stopped right behind you, wrapped one arm around your middle, and spread his fingers over your stomach.

“They’re really freaking me out. I don’t know what’s going on.” He leaned his forehead against the back of yours, breathing in deeply. His eyes were closed for a moment, when he allowed himself to enjoy being so close to you. He’d done the same last night, blending out everything that had been going on, focusing on you instead, and that had helped him fall asleep. You’d always had that effect on him. In your arms, close to you, that was where he was at home and at peace. The last couple of years had been rough, and the drugs had helped him forget about you, or at least push you aside so that he could lead a happy life without you, but seeing you now, having you in his arms, it was better than any high he could have gotten from his drugs.

“I’m sure they’ll get in touch soon.” You wanted to convince both of you, because you were rather close to running all the way to Dustin to see if they were alright.

“I’m glad you’re here,” Eddie admitted, brushing his nose against the nape of your neck, making you shiver involuntarily.

“So am I,” you admitted breathlessly, feeling something in the air between you shift. Eddie hugged you a little tighter, before he put his hands on your waist to turn you around, so that you were facing him. The spoon with which you’d been cooking was still in your hand, and you held on for dear life as his left hand came up to cup your cheek. You’d been close last night, you’d cuddled for hours in your sleep, but this was still different. The intensity in his eyes was something only reserved for you, but he’d never told you that. Still, you remembered that look.

“Hey, it’s Nancy!” A voice came from the walkie talkie.

“Fucking finally!” you said, breaking the moment between you, because as much as you wanted to see where this was going, as much as you wished to feel his lips on yours after all these years, this was way more important.

“Wheeler! Hey!” While Eddie talked to Nancy, you managed to finish… cooking, if you could call it that. It was a drop in the ocean, but if the others got here with some more food, you’d be able to manage.

Eddie’s eyes were still on you, his mind racing from what had nearly happened, what he’d wanted to happen, even though it probably wasn’t the right time. There was still a lot of catching up left for you two to do. He didn’t even know whether you were in a relationship right now, but judging by the way you’d looked at him, had reacted to him, he really didn’t think that you were. Still: Wrong place, wrong time.

When Eddie asked for a six pack, you had to smile to yourself. Yes, wrong time for that, but then again… you completely understood him there.

“She hung up on me!” The look of disbelief on Eddie’s face nearly made you chuckle, but that was probably not an appropriate situation, but he just looked like a lost puppy.

“They’ll get here as soon as possible,” you reassured him, handed him a plate now that you were finished with cooking. “It’s not a lot, but it will do for now.”

“Thanks, darling.” He leaned down to kiss your cheek, that immediately turned red, and you didn’t even know why. Maybe because he’d called you darling. You didn’t question it, and instead took your own plate and started eating up. You’d certainly need the energy.

After you’d finished, you walked out of the house all by yourself to take a look around again, but there was nobody to be found. You hurried Eddie along because even though you hadn’t seen anyone, you didn’t want to risk being caught. As soon as the police got their hands on him, he’d be locked up, and they’d make sure that he didn’t get out. You just knew it.

Maybe, the wisest idea would have been to take Eddie away from here, pack him in your car and drive away. You could take him to NYC with you, to your apartment until the whole situation had dissolved, but… you couldn’t leave the others alone, and Eddie never would have left with you. So you were stuck here.

Once in the boathouse again, Eddie managed to relax a little bit, and so did you. The others were probably already on their way here, bringing you more supplies, so you just had to lay low.

“Talk to me,” Eddie said out of the blue, but you’d realised it as well. The silence was deafening, and while you were cautious, listening to what was going on outside so that you’d notice once someone arrived here, you could still talk.

“Well, what do you want to know?” You gathered the blankets out of the boat and folded them up, put them aside. Who knew whether you’d need them tonight again?

“Are you happy?” The worry in his voice, in his eyes made you look away from him again. You’d never been really happy without him. Sure, you’d talked yourself into believing you were, but Eddie had always been missing.

“I tried to be happy…” You started, leaning against the wall, as you crossed your arms over your chest, leaving some distance between Eddie and you. “I should be. I got into Juilliard, I have my own apartment, I even make money with music…” Eddie’s eyes widened in surprise, his lips curled up into a smile. You’d done it! You’d really gotten into Juilliard, and he was proud of you.

“They let you make your kind of music, or…?”

“Yeah, that was the most surprising thing. I wasn’t even sure if I wanted to go, but it was my taste in music that made them ask me to come.” That still blew your mind, and you were more than happy about that opportunity, but you knew that your own music wasn’t as good as it could be because something was missing. Eddie…

“But you’re not happy?” He frowned in confusion. It sounded great! Making money with music even though you were still enrolled? 

“Not really…” You wet your lips with your tongue, trying to find the right words. You should have been happy, you had everything, except for the one person who made your life complete, no matter if he’d been your friend or your lover. “You were missing. I tried to be happy without you, but in the end… My songs are not the same without your help.”

That last sentence told Eddie more than everything else you’d just said, because it had been the same for him. He’d been able to push the thought, the memory of you aside, have fun with other girls, but when it came to writing music… Nothing sounded as good as the things you’d written together.

“What about you?” You cut off his train of thought, not really wanting to focus too much on you, on your feelings for him, that had never gone away, and were now back stronger than ever. “They told me about the drugs.”

“Of course they did…” Eddie rubbed a hand over his face and sighed. It wasn’t like he’d tried to hide that from you, and it wasn’t exactly something he was extremely proud of, but that was his life. “When you left… I wasn’t able to concentrate on school, because we always studied together.”

Yes, you fondly remembered the way Eddie used to touch you when it had been really hard for him to concentrate. A hand on your thigh, your hand in his, or his head in your lap with your fingers in his hair, which had turned out to be the best way to get that stuff into his head. You’d thought that he’d be able to make it without you, but he hadn’t.

“I didn’t want to blame you for that last week, y/n.” Eddie looked back up at you, regret shining in his eyes. “It was all just… a little much.” And he’d missed you so much it hurt. By now, you knew that he’d thought you’d found someone else shortly after you’d left, and it made his reaction a little more understandable for you.

“Yeah, tell me about it.” While you’d been able to prepare yourself for that meeting, seeing him right in front of you, all grown up, had still caught you off-guard.

“With the drugs, I was able to get you off my mind.” Not that he’d ever wanted to forget what you’d had, but he’d had to blend out the pain, the longing for someone who hadn’t been in his life anymore.

“Eddie I…” Your words died on your lips when you heard a car outside. Hoping that it was you delivery service, you snuck up to the window to get a look at who was there, but it wasn’t anyone you knew. They were all dressed in black, probably younger than you.

“Who are they?” you asked Eddie who’d come up next to you.

“Shit!” He wanted to punch a wall, vanish into thin air, but he couldn’t run right now, not with them out there. They’d see him, it was still not dark enough outside. “Jason is… was Chrissy’s boyfriend.”

“Oh no.”

That wasn’t good, not at all. Eddie pretty much dove for the walkie talkie, trying to reach the others.

“Hey, Dustin? It’s me, Eddie… You remember me, right?”

You stayed hidden in the shadows, still looking outside. They were roaming through the house, so you were still safe for now, but it was only a matter of time until they found you. You looked towards Eddie, but he didn’t get an answer from anyone. Meanwhile, you were trying to come up with a plan, though for now, you really had to stay here, hoping that they’d just leave, when they didn’t find anyone.

They took their time looking around the house, so it was already getting dark, when you turned towards Eddie.

“When they come this way, I’ll go talk to them.”

“Like hell!”

“Eddie, listen, it’s the best chance we have. I can distract them so you can get out and into the woods.”

“I’m not leaving you with them. Nu-uh, not gonna happen, princess.”

“Still so stubborn, huh?”

“Just like you.”

“Yeah, and remember who usually won our discussions.”

You raised your eyebrow at him, crossed your arms beneath your breasts. There was no way you’d let him win this argument, not when his life was in danger. The police might want to take him into custody and question him, but these idiots out there wanted this life, you were sure of that.

When you saw them leave the house and head for the boathouse, you cast one last look at Eddie, before you left him. The only problem was, that he couldn’t get out of the boathouse without them seeing him, only if he took the boat out and crossed the lake. You hadn’t really thought about that.

“Who are you?” one of them asked as soon as they saw you.

“I should ask you that! What are you doing in Rick’s house? You have no right to be here.” You didn’t think that they’d attack you, but still, fear pricked at the back of your neck.

“We’re looking for someone. Your turn!” That must have been Jason, the leader of this pack. You were able to detect a hint of sadness in his look, but it was overpowered by rage.

“I’m taking care of Rick’s house while he’s not here.” Eddie had told you that he was serving time right now, so your story sounded plausible.

“Never seen you around.”

“Well, because I don’t live here anymore. I live in New York, but I came here to do him that favour.” You held your ground, crossed your arms again. “And now, I’d like you to leave.”

“Not gonna happen.” Jason pushed you aside to get to the boathouse. You tried to grab hold of his jacket, but missed, and he was so fast that you were only able to follow close behind. Relief washed over you when you saw that the boat was missing, that Eddie had gotten out, but after that, everything turned to shit. Because you weren’t the only one noticing that the boat was amiss.

They walked past you again to get outside, and immediately saw Eddie out on the lake. You tried to think of something to do, but they were so set on getting him, that there was nothing that would distract them at all. You tried to hold them back, but they just pushed you aside again.

“Hey freak!” Jason’s voice echoed through the darkness, getting Eddie’s attention. Your eyes met for a moment, but then Eddie tried to start the engine - which of course didn’t work. At least, he had the oars in the boat that you’d put back in before, so that he could try to get away.

“Leave him alone!” You yelled at the boys, still trying to get them away from the water, but Jason pushed you so hard that you stumbled and fell, hitting your head somewhere. The pain blinded you for a moment, but you tried your best to focus, got up again in a desperate attempt to help Eddie, ignoring your own pain.

Both guys went after him, trying to catch up and when they were nearly there, the other one stopped. Jason talked to him, but he didn’t react. What the hell was going on now?

His body dipped under the water, before it suddenly flew up into the air, levitating a few metres above the water. You stumbled backwards, not really sure what was going on. You couldn’t really see what was happening, because it was too dark, but you heard it. The snapping of bones Eddie had described when he’d talked about Chrissy. These sounds made your stomach churn, your vision blur, and you fell to your knees, not able to stand this situation. This was what Eddie had seen up close, and now it was happening again. The sound of snapping bones would haunt you, you already knew that.

“GO!” You yelled towards Eddie, who was obviously worried about you, but there was no way you'd let him come back. Jason still wanted to take Eddie down, and the police would probably get here soon enough, so he had to leave. Eddie hesitated, but then he swam to the other side of the lake.

—

“Listen, they were trespassing and I just wanted them to get the hell away.” You were seated in front of two policemen, who were both questioning you in Rick’s house

“And you were here because…?” One of them asked, writing something down in his notebook. They already had your name, your address, because there was no reason for you to lie about that.

“I already told you, I’m staying at Rick’s house, keeping everything in check until he gets out. I needed a little break from my family, so that was the perfect arrangement.”

“And what happened on the lake.”

“That guy, Jason I think, was completely out of his mind, shoved me aside…” You showed them the cut on your temple, which hadn’t been taken care of at all so far. “And jumped in the water.” And then you told them what you saw happen to Patrick. It sounded like something out of a movie, but Jason and you were telling the same story.

“Alright… We’ve got everything we need so far. Just stay in town.”

“I’m not planning on leaving town, just heading out to clear my head a little.” Not really because you were looking out for Rick’s house and his belongings, but because of Eddie and everything else that was going on.

Outside, you were greeted by onlookers and media vans. Shit… You really didn’t need any of them to see you, so you tried your best to sneak past them only to bump into someone, who was apparently trying to sneak in.

“Sorry,” you mumbled, trying to walk past them, but strong hands grabbed your upper arms to make you look up.

“Thank God, you’re okay!”

“Steve?” Relief washed over you and you found yourself wrapping your arms around him, holding on tight. It was so good to see him, to see the others, because over his shoulder, you could see Max, Robin and Dustin - and two others. Tears welled up in your eyes and you closed them tight.

“Come one, we’ll get you away from here.” He was sure that Eddie was nowhere here or he’d be glued to your side, so Steve wrapped one arm around you to guide you back to the car - your car.

Once you were on your way, the tears subsided, and you filled them in on what had happened the night before. You were still shaken up by the whole ordeal, and Robin took your hand to show you support. You weren’t alone in this one, you were here with them, but Eddie was God knew where all by himself.

They told you what they’d found out as well - and what was happening with Max. This was all so unbelievable, but you’d seen it with your own eyes, and now you had found a way to keep Vecna at bay when it came to Max at least. Everything else… was still to be found out. It sounded so easy, find a portal and kick Vecna’s ass, but it wasn’t easy at all, that much was clear.

You weren’t even far from the house, when you heard Eddie’s voice over the walkie talkie. Your heart skipped a beat upon hearing him, because that meant that he was safe, that he was somewhere where he could reach out to you. Everyone was silent, Nancy parked at the side of the road, because you needed to find out where Eddie was first, before you could do anything.

“I’m pretty goddamn far from okay,” you heard him say, your heart dropping immediately. You knew that he wouldn’t be fine, but the tone of his voice, the desperation made you nearly lose it. He’d been through enough as a kid, and now this. At least now you knew where he was so that you could get going.

“How is y/n?” he asked, making Dustin look up at you, handing you the walkie talkie.

“I’m here.” Your voice cracked, you couldn’t help it, tears nearly welling up again, but you got a grip, focused on his voice instead. “I’m okay, don’t worry.” Well, you were pretty goddamn far from okay as well, but you didn’t want him to worry about you. It was bad enough as it was.

“It’s good to hear your voice…”

“Yours as well… Hold tight, Eds, we’re on our way.”

“Okay…” he hesitated for a moment, still holding the button to speak, but then he dropped it, not getting the words out.

It took you some time to get to Skull Rock, especially because Dustin always insisted that you were going in the wrong direction, because his compass pointed you in a different one than Steve was going. Then again Steve said that he knew the way by heart, and in the end: he was right, and you found yourself at Skull Rock. You hadn’t been able to pay attention to the conversations happening around you, because your mind was preoccupied, but once you were there, you looked around trying to find Eddie.

“You just can’t admit that you’re wrong, you little butthead.” Steve looked down at Dustin, satisfied with himself, until Eddie jumped down in front of them.

“I concur. You, Dustin Henderson, are a total butthead.”

Your heart felt with relief once you saw him, and you couldn’t hold back your feelings. You pretty much flung yourself into his arms, holding on tight immediately. His arms wrapped around you, and you heard him breathe a sigh of relief.

“You’re alright,” he whispered into your ear, burying his face in the crook of your neck, inhaling you, because for a moment he’d thought he’d never see or hold you again. The others gave you a moment, before Dustin went in for a hug as well. You had to smile, because it was so obvious how much Dustin adored Eddie - and Steve as well, both of them some kind of big brother figure for him.

While you’d told them what you’d witnessed, it was now Eddie’s turn to tell them. Not that there was a lot they hadn’t already heard, but his insight mattered as well.

“So, uh, I did the thing that I do now, apparently. I ran.” The chuckle that followed his words was bitter.

“You had no other choice. And I sent you away, alright?” He shouldn’t feel guilty about that, because he couldn’t have protected you from anything or anyone, and it had been safer this way. At least he’d gotten out of there.

Nancy figured out that the time Patrick was killed was the time they had their kind of run-in with Vecna. Now you knew how he attacked, where he attacked from, but there was still the problem with getting into the Upside Down to be able to face Vecna. Killing him with a bullet, chopping his head off, all good ideas, but therefore you’d have to be right in front of him.

Dustin suddenly yelled: “Boom!” You damn near jumped, because his voice echoed through the forest. “Bada… bada… boom! I was right! Skull Rock was North!”

“Do you really want to discuss this? Right now?” You shook your head at him, because they were more important things to talk about in your opinion, but when he talked to Lucas about the compass, aber the electromagnetic fields, his reaction, his words made a lot more sense. They’d found a portal like this before, so that meant that there was another gate close by. A good thing, right? The needle pointed in the direction of the gate, so Dustin started walking that way.

“Where are you going?” Steve intervened, telling Dustin once again that Eddie was still a wanted man, that they couldn’t just go for a hike in the woods like this.

“What say you, Eddie the Banished?” Dustin’s attention was on Eddie now, waiting for a response. You knew that it was the only chance you had at saving both Max and Eddie, but it wasn’t your call to make.

“I say you’re asking me to follow you into Mordor, which, if I’m totally straight with you, I think is a really bad idea. But uh, the Shire… The Shire is burning.” Eddie got up from where he was squatting down. “So Mordor it is.”

You never thought you’d find yourself in a situation like this, where Mordor was the path you’d choose, but right now, you didn’t have another choice, and you’d rather walk with Eddie into Mordor than stay behind and see the Shire burning to the ground.

“What is Mordor?” you heard Steve ask, which really made you smile to yourself.

“Looks like I’ll have to lend you a book once we’re done here, so you can find out,” you said with a chuckle, before you walked past him to get to Eddie. It was better if Steve found out once all of this was over instead of right now.

You followed Dustin for a good while, not really knowing where you were, but at one point, you reached Lover’s Lake again. Dustin nearly stepped into the water, but Eddie grabbed him to pull him back.

The dark lake stretched out in front of you, and you felt a wave of nausea hit you. The memories from last night were still too vivid in your head, and you needed a moment to collect yourself. Eddie’s hand on your elbow made you nearly jump.

“It’s alright, it’s just me,” he said with a soft smile, letting his hand drop from your elbow to your waist to pull you close for a moment. His lips met your temple, close to where you’d been hurt the night before. “I’ve got you, alright?”

You slowly nodded, before you took his hand, walked up to the others with him again. With Eddie by your side, you felt a lot more at ease, you felt safe.

They had experience with these kinds of things - not that you were envious of them for living through something so gruesome - so they were pretty sure that there had to be a gate in Lover’s Lake, but there was only one way to find out. Eddie pointed out the boat he’d hidden not far away from here.

The only question was who would go on the lake and who’d stay behind, because there was no way all of you would fit in the boat, let alone stay above water. While you were pretty much glued to Eddie, not letting go of his hand, you were one of the first people in the boat. The end of the story was that only Dustin, Max and Lucas stayed behind, because they had to watch out for Max. Maybe, one of you should have stayed behind as well, but you weren’t thinking straight right now. If you weren’t holding Eddie’s hand, you’d be biting your nails right now.

Eyes on the compass, you commandeered the boat across the water until Dustin’s compass went absolutely nuts. Dustin confirmed that you must be really close to the gate.

“What are you doing?” Nancy’s eyes landed on Steve as he took off his shoes and socks. 

“Somebody’s gotta go down there and check this thing out.”

“Oh hell no!” You looked at him as if the compass wasn’t the only thing going nuts right now. Was he serious? Apparently he was, and you had to admit that he was right, that this was the only way to find out. Still, you had a bad feeling about this. Steve was right, he was the one with the most experience, and none of you were eager to go down there and check it out.

Eddie wrapped the flashlight in a plastic bag and handed it to Steve. It was already dark here, so it would be pitch black once he was under water. The four of you still had at least a little light from the moon.

With a heavy heart, you watched Steve jump into the water, and then you waited, keeping an eye on the clock. Seconds felt like hours right now, and he didn’t come back up. When he finally did, you breathed a sigh of relief.

“It’s down there,” he said, told you that it was pretty big. You’d found your gate into the Upside Down, to Vecna, now you just had to come up with a good plan to defeat him. All these thoughts were wiped from your head, when Steve was suddenly pulled under water again. What the hell was going on?

While Nancy got up, Eddie tried to stop her, asking her if she really wanted to go in there. She only told them to wait there and jumped in after Steve. You felt your heart plummet, shaking your head, hoping that this was not really happening… but it did. And it wasn’t only Nancy, because Robin sat on the edge of the boat as well.

“What are you doing?” Eddie asked, the fear in his voice all to present. “She said wait!”

“Yeah, I heard her.” And Robin was gone as well. None of them came back up, though, Neither Steve, nor Nancy or Robin.

“Goddamn it! Son of a bitch!” Eddie yelled for all the world to hear. “Shit! Shit! Shit!”

There was no way you’d leave them here alone. Not a chance. And while Eddie was freaking out, you got up as well. After what you’d experienced last night, you were scared of this lake, but there were three people down there, who wanted to do everything to save Eddie and Max, and you weren’t gonna let them die down there.

“What are you…” Eddie tried to ask, but when you held out your hand for him, he took it.

“Together, alright?”

One look in your eyes and Eddie nodded. Without wasting another moment, the two of you jumped in after the others, at first not really sure where you were going, but then you saw it. The red glow at the bottom of the lake drew you in, and you knew that this was where you needed to go. With Eddie’s hand still in yours, because you needed the contact to make it through this, you swam towards the gate and pretty much tumbled out on the other side.

Before you’d even had a chance to look around, you heard Steve’s screams. It was dark and terrifying, but you had to find Steve. Nancy led the way, and what you saw when you got to him nearly made you run in the other direction, but you stayed, reached for one of the oars that was lying around, and tried to get these bats away from Steve. It was pure madness, unlike anything you’d ever seen or experienced, and you weren’t exactly keen on repeating anything like that, but you were here now. While Nancy and Robin tried to get the bat that was strangling Steve off his neck, Eddie and you tried to fend the others off. It was a bit like baseball but with bigger targets that moved everywhere.

It was a complete medd, Nancy got attacked as well, but somehow… by some miracle you managed to kill two of them, scare the others away. Your heart was racing from the adrenaline and while Nancy looked after Steve, you looked towards Eddie.

“Jesus H. Christ!” he yelled, throwing the oar to the ground. It was too much, not only for you, but for him as well, and you really didn’t know how the other three were managing. Steve at least looked like absolute shit. You had no idea how he was still standing. The bats had bitten whole chunks out of him, the ligature marks around his neck all too visible, and he was spitting out blood.

You should get back as soon as possible, meet with the others and definitely get Steve patched up, but when you turned towards the gate, the fucking bats came back - and they were standing guard around the gate so that you couldn’t go back home. It would have worked, if it had only been the ones around the gate, but there was a while swarm of bats coming your way.

“The woods!”Nancy said right before she started running. Well, you didn’t really have a choice, did you? So you ran after her, grabbing Eddie’s hand along the way to pull him along. You had no idea, how far you’d been running, but you made it to Skull Rock, hid beneath it to maybe come up with a plan. The bats were flying over the trees in one direction until you didn’t hear or see any of them anymore.

But Steve was still not in a really stable condition, at least in your opinion. He needed medical attention, but he wouldn’t get that here, so Nancy did the best she could, tore some fabric from her shirt and wrapped it around Steve to put pressure on the wounds and hopefully stop the bleeding.

“You stay here,” Eddie said, raising your hand to his lips to brush a kiss across your knuckles, before he let go of it and climbed up on the rock. You couldn’t even protest, he was too fast for you.

“So, uh, this place is like Hawkins, but with monsters and nasty shit?” he called out once he’d taken a look around. It was so dark, the sky lit up in red, all of it just terrifying.

Nancy told him that his assumption was right, which didn’t really manage to calm you down, quite the opposite. What they said about the vines, all of it being a hive mind as well. You took a deep breath, trying to focus on what was happening right now, what needed to be done and how you would be able to find a way home.

Robin had a good point, and that got your attention. If everything was still here, you could definitely get guns from the police, maybe not grenades, but at least something to protect yourselves with. The police station wasn’t your destination, though, because Nancy had guns and her house was closer. A big surprise for you, but you weren’t one to question that. After what you’d seen in the last twenty-four hours, you already understood why she had them.

After Eddie had given Steve his vest with the words for your modesty, dude, you were shaking up by what seemed like an earthquake, loud noises in the distance, screeches that chilled you to the bone. You clung onto Eddie, while you were lying on the floor until the shaking stopped. Yes, it was definitely time to get on your way.

You led the way with Robin and Nancy, trying to clear your head a little bit, while Eddie walked with Steve. They had a bit to talk, because Steve wanted to thank Eddie for what he’d done earlier, and because Eddie had to tell him that he hadn’t believed Steve Harrington to be a good guy, and yes he’d even gotten a little jealous because Dustin had talked about him all the time. In addition, the way Steve had handled the bats had been quite impressive.

Eddie wouldn’t have jumped in the lake if it hadn’t been for Nancy and Robin - and you of course. He didn’t consider himself brave at all, but the three of you had been an inspiration in a way. Especially Nancy, and so Eddie told Steve what he’d observed, gave him a little nudge.

“What about you and y/n?” Steve asked, trying to deflect the attention from himself. “What’s your story?”

“Oh boy,” Eddie started, taking a deep breath. His eyes were on you, looking out for you, but he answered Harrington, because maybe, it was good to talk about it, even though he didn’t know what you were right now. “We were neighbours… ten years ago. And my parents weren’t exactly… the caring kind, you know?” He glanced at Steve, before he diverted his attention to you again. “Y/N found me outside in the rain and took me home with her. I mean, we’d talked before, but that was the day our friendship really started. She became my best friend, her Mum got CPS involved and I moved in with my uncle.”

Steve followed his words, and while he’d known that Eddie lived with his uncle, he hadn’t known the reasons for that until now. He’d assumed that Eddie had maybe lost his parents, but being taken away from them because they hadn’t cared about him was actually worse. Not that Steve couldn’t relate, because the relationship with his parents wasn’t the best either, but he still lived with them. Not for very much longer hopefully.

“We were best friends for five years and then I finally had the courage to ask her out on a real date… Was real romat´ntic and shit.” The memory still made Eddie smile. He could still see the way your whole face had lit up upon seeing the garden decked out in fairy lights because you loved them so much. He wondered if that was still the case. “Only problem was that her family moved to NYC shortly after that.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah…” Eddie nodded, smiling to himself because of Steve’s reaction. “We made a promise to each other. We were too young to get married, so we said that we’d do that one day.” Eddie held up his hand, pointing at the ring. “I even got us rings. Pretty silly maybe, but… I never wanted to lose her.” Steve nodded, showing Eddie that he was listening. Yes, he had questions, but he didn’t want to stop Eddie from telling your story. “After she moved, the contact stopped. We only found out now that she left me a letter with her new address, which I never got.”

“And yet, you’re still wearing the ring.” Steve’s observation made Eddie chuckle. Yeah, Harrington had picked up on that immediately, of course he had. “What about y/n?”

“Still wearing hers…” Just thinking about it warmed Eddie’s heart, because it meant something, right?

“That definitely means something.” Steve played right into Eddie’s thoughts with his words. “And she came back here to see you.” That’s what Dustin had told him at least, so he assumed it to be right. “It’s pretty obvious that she still has feelings for you, man.”

“You think?” That got Eddie’s attention, because he got his hopes up. No matter what, he wanted you in his life again, because he’d missed you as a person first and foremost, but calling you his… Yeah, that would be perfection.

“Yeah… The relief on her face when she heard your voice on the walkie talkie? She was so worried about you, Munson, she nearly broke down when she knew that you were okay.” Steve smiled at Eddie, giving his shoulder a little shove. “And the way she looks at you all the time.. You realise she's pretty much clung to you ever since you reunited, right?” Eddie nodded at his words. Up until now, you’d been holding hands or whatever else to not lose the other one. “So, what about you?”

“Me?” Eddie asked, casting a quick glance at Steve, when the ground beneath all of you started to shake again. He kept his balance, but it wasn’t easy. Once the shaking ceased again, he looked back at Steve. “Never stopped loving her.” Even after he’d seen you with that other guy, his heart had still been beating for you.

They guys caught up with you, but before they were in hearing distance, Steve pulled Eddie towards himself again. “Then you should let her know.”

Easier said than done, but he was planning on it. Once this whole shitshow was over, he’d tell you.

You had no idea how far you’d walked or what kind of way you’d taken, and you would never find the way back to the gate, but you were here: The Wheeler house.

Tag-List: @tellhound @spideyanakin-interacts @hardysbitch @angelzone @neverending-dreamm @bellamy-barnes @mygreygreenery @hanahisawizard @bambi-laufeyson @lonely-kermit @beepisbeep @haylaansmi @snapefiction @snekssss @jssmth5 @give-em-hellfire @ghosttownwherenoonegoes @violetpenguinkris

Let me know if you want to be tagged for this series, or Eddie stuff in general 💚

[impossiblelibrary]

Today's rant brought to you by: Queer Eye Japan, can we all just try to be as kind as they try to be?

After watching the Queer Eye Japan super short season, I wanted to google to see the overall reaction to the show, make sure that my western eyes were correct in seeing the care that was given to the culture. Were cultural taboos, other than being outwardly gay, crossed? So I find this article in the top results and other than the perspective, why tho? Tokyoesque.com had an article with a higher reading level, with surface level appreciation but at least better written.

I can't get over this hate article though. Unfounded, dumb, wrong and incorrect. Do not go forward unless you like that blistering kind of anger from me.

But the reasons just get weaker as the article extends: "Hurts the country it set out to save?" Looking for white savior much? They did not go to save Japan, they gave some free shit to like 4-5 people, think smaller.

Their culture guide wasn't gay enough.

You want to suggest any lgbt insta models or celebrities, use your platform to raises some up?

"There is a growing sexless culture in Japan for married and unmarried people, and it is perilous watching Queer Eye present this without any context behind what is driving this behavior."

Sexiness is what the fab 5 embrace, unfortunately and it was probably discussed behind the scenes of how much talking about sex was allowed or polite and the conversation of not having sex is closer to the tip of the tongue rather than the feeling of sexiness. The West is not the ones blasting that information. It is across multiple Japanese printed newspapers and online stories by now and the "context" is still being discussed and debated amongst Japanese. So I don't think any outsiders should be weighing in or "explaining" this phenomenon. We can repeat what we have been told but guessing at the reasons is not our place. The reasons illustrated by the author of the article seem lacking, a take but not the only one, but who am I to speak on that being in a sexual relationship with someone who pulls from that culture?

Kiko begins to lecture Yoko-san on how she “threw away her womanhood” (referring to a Japanese idiom, onna wo suteru) by going makeup-free and wearing drab, shapeless clothes.

The mistranslation by the subtitles fixed by this author was necessary information. But Kiko didn't lecture her on it, it was brought up by Yoko before any of them arrived, that was her theme, that was what she had decided to focus on. Meanwhile, if you watched Jonathan, he understood there was no time to spend on makeup and skincare so provided her a one instrument, 3 points of color on the skin to feel prettier. That and the entire episode being the 5 treating her like a woman on a date, not trying to hook her up, which is what they did in American eps.

"In teaching a Japanese woman, who already struggles to find time for herself, how to make an English recipe, Antoni is making great TV and nothing more."

So Antoni shouldn't have taught her apple pie because it's too exotic for a Japanese woman. (Can you smell the sexism?)

He didn't make an apple pie, altho Yoko did mention her mother made that for her when she was a kid. He made an apple tartine after going to a Japanese bakery who makes that all the time. Then highlighted the apples came from Fuji in true Japanese media fashion. Honey, American television doesn't usually highlight where the ingredients come from. A Japanese producer told him to do that. So all worries handled within the same ep. She got Japanese ingredients, had the recipe shown to her and then made it for her friends in her own house. Did the author actually watch this show or nah?

"beaten over the head with his western self-help logic. “You have to live for yourself,” he says."

The style of build up the 5 went for was confrontational but in a "I'm fighting for you" way. It's hard to describe, but the best I can say is, a person has multiple voices in their head, from parents, siblings, society, and maybe themselves. By being loud and obnoxious, American staples right there, they are adding one more voice. You deserve this, you are amazing, you are worth it. I know this is against most Japanese cultural modesty, but maybe it shouldn't be.

Sarcasm lies ahead:

Apparently: mispronunciation is microaggressions, not just someone who had a sucky school system. Yea okay, They're laughing at the language not at how stumbling these monolinguals are with visiting another country. Mmhm. Japanese don't say I love you and don't touch and that should stay that way instead of maybe, once in awhile, feeling like they can hug. Yeah, let's just ignore Yoko's break down that she had never hugged her lifelong friend after hugging strangers multiple times. Maid cafes are never sexualized in Japan ever, just don't go down that one street in Akihabara where the men are led off by the hand sheepishly blushing. Gag me. And Japanese men love to cry in front of their wives and would never break down once the wife leaves. I have never seen a Japanese movie showcase that move. Grr.

"I identify as many cultures."

So you're a Japanese man when it's convenient for you to get an article published? Are you nationally Japanese or just ethnically or culturally?

Homeland is an inherently racist word?

"After the Bush administration created the Department of Homeland Security after the 9/11 terrorist attacks, a Republican consultant and speechwriter Peggy Noonan urged, “the name Homeland Security grates on a lot of people, understandably. Homeland isn’t really an American word, it’s not something we used to say or say now.”

Yes, let's use a Washington Post article rather than a etymology professor. Yes, the google search results increased after 2001 Homeland Security was used but the word has been around since the 1660s and I've read multiple turn of the century lit on white people returning to their homeland, i.e. the town off the coast they were born in.

"But" is not disagreeing. I think the repeated offender for the author is the not acknowledging the makeover-ees feelings. But, that is how LGBT have decided to deal with the inner voices that invade from society. They are just that, not our own, they are the influence of society, and we can choose, we have to choose, to be influenced by someone, anyone else.

Karamo can't speak about being black when an Asian is speaking about being Asian, even though the Asian gay man was feeling alone. It's called relating bitches, and I'm done with people saying that is redirecting the conversation, it's extending the conversation. That's how we talk, the spotlight is shared, especially when someone's about to cry and doesn't want to be seen as crying, time to turn the spotlight.

The gay monk wasn't good enough, you should have invited the gay politician.

Yeah, causes I'm sure a politician has all the time in the world for a quick stint and cry. They picked a Japanese monk who travels to NY because they had a guest who travels to the West too. Did you want him to stop traveling back and forth? Did you want a pure, ethnic and cultural Japanese gay man who has no ties to the west to talk to this Western educated young man? Seriously?

This is just not how it works in Japan.

Being in a multi-cultural marriage between two rebels, discussions on facets of culture are plenty in my household. Culture should be respected enough to be considered but not held on a pedestal like we should never adjust or throw some things out. LGBT being quiet and private for instance. "Being seen" was Jonathan's advice, and a good one especially for a Japanese gay man that was called feminine since he was a kid. Some gay men can hide, but as Jonathan said, he couldn't hide what he was, he couldn't hide this. So fuck it. Don't hide. It's actually more dangerous for a feminine man to come off as anxious rather than gay and proud. It makes you more of a target if they think you won't fight back. Proud means, Imma throw hands too, bitch.

This is also from the civil rights playbook going back to Black America: never hold a protest or a fight without the cameras, without being seen. LGBT have found the more seen they are, in media, in the streets, the better off we are. When LGBT Americans were being "private" about our lifestyles, we died, a la 1980s. They won't care if you start dying off if they never saw you to begin with.

And hence why I think the author's real anger is from these 5 being seen dancing flamboyantly in Shibuya, in Harajuku, afforded the privilege of doing this safely because of their tourist status, cameras and very low violence rate in Tokyo, loud and obnoxiously. Honestly, they wouldn't have been invited or nominated if they didn't want that brash American-ness coming into their home, just for a taste, at least.

Here's my real anger, my own jealousy: Japan's queer community currently does not have marriage or adoption rights. US does, so we have progressed further. But we are also not that many years from being tied to cow fences with barbed wire, beaten with baseball bats and left for dead overnight. If things are so bad over there, maybe take a few pages from the civil right playbook we took so much time to perfect and produced by the Black Americans who fought first. But so far, I only hear loss of jobs and marriages, which we still have here too. Stop trying to divide us, we are one community, LGBT around the world and we are here to try to help. Take it or leave it, it's not like we're going to go organize your own Pride parade for you.

Rant over? I guess. Is this important enough to be put in the google results along with his. Hell no, anyone with half a mind can see he's reaching more than half the time. And any argument about: this wasn't covered! There are a shit ton of conversations that are not covered in the 45 min they have. They are not a civil rights show, it's a makeover show, doing their best in that direction anyway. Know what it is.

Next blog post, what research I would guess was happening behind the scenes for each of the 5? I'm pretty sure I saw Jonathan doing Japanese style makeup there...

[awilddreamermain]

Hi, Chels! Congratulations!! I'm so happy for you! You deserve every follower and more! That is a threat, I'm holding everyone hostage 🔪

I would love to get a MHA matchup, I wanna see who you'd match me with! Got me so curious! SFW & NSFW if you'd be willing!

My name is Chloe but I prefer May, nicknames include May-May, Maybell or Chlo.

I'm 25, pronouns are she/he, Cancer Moon, Aries Sun and Virgo Rising. Quite the weird mash of zodiacs, huh?

My favorite colors are pink (that soft pastel kinda baby pink), red (especially blood/garnet red) and...can I add pink again? Any shade of pink this time. Bubblegum or hot pink.

Favorite AU's include A/B/O, Mafia, Historical, Fantasy and does Mythical Creatures count?

Oh...oh boy, I gotta look deep for some fun facts that aren't just...facts but I'll do my best!

1) My sneezes are so short and high pitched I go "chu".

2) I have vitiligo, makes me look like a dog because it's mostly around my mouth and my right eye so I have a spot!

3) I have atrocious balance, my knees and shins are always banged up because I cannot for the life of me walk correctly.

4) I have a stutter, on top of speaking so quickly it turns into a jumbled mess. So good luck understanding what I said because I have no idea either.

5) I have a growing unicorn plush collection. My favorite is Cupcake, one that's actually taller than I am. Big chunk.

My likes are pretty simple. Cute & soft sweaters, blankets, warm coffee and strawberry milk, pastries and the cold! Winter is my favorite season. History, particularly the Medieval and Victorian times.

My interests revolve around creativity and you could say they're my hobbies as well. Drawing in particular, I used to do digital but I'm stuck with traditional pencil and paper at the moment. I'm dipping my toes into painting and its very fun! Obviously writing and reading and if I'm not doing of those listed then I'm definitely playing video games.

Personality I might say I'm quite split down the middle. At first, to a complete stranger I might come across as cold, stoic, with a resting bitch face, that just wants to get whatever I'm outside for done so I can leave. I'd create a witty or sarcastic comeback if I was given sass by a Karen but with my speech issues? I'd be lucky to get one coherent word out at her...and spend the rest of the day fantasizing what could've happened. So I'm rather quiet, agoraphobia hits hard in large or crowded places so I'm an anxiety riddled mess on the verge of a panic attack. In private or with people that I'm comfortable with? Complete opposite. Happy, bubbly, cracking puns and jokes so get those groan worthy reactions. I try to be the "mom friend" and get over my issues if someone is having it worse, I'll march up to a counter and ask for ketchup if someone wanted it but was too scared to do it themselves. The shoulder to lean and cry on, I'm highly empathetic and understanding, compassionate at times. But I have to actively try and keep myself positive and say good things about myself because I do fall into the pit of self-loathing and hate.

For appearance I'd say I'm average height, pale with white splotches that are inching larger due to my vitiligo, chubby, ashy blonde, blue eyes, button nose. I'd say I'm decently cute? I don't know if I can rate myself.

Okay I know I said I'd be looking into Zodiac compatibility for this but— I literally just screamed internally "KIRISHIMA" when I was reading this. You two would be perfect omg. This Libra king would do anything for you. For this you're an artist and the daughter of a mafia boss :) I like to think of ship names sometimes so like, yours would either be like Eijmay or Mayjirou or Kiriloe— that last one and first are awful I know so lets go with the second? I can't write a proper stutter for the life of me so I tried to keep your dialogue to the minimum.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ Pairing: Eijirou Kirishima

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀AU: Mafia

⠀Theme Song: You're The One That I Want - Alex & Sierra

How you meet (his point of view):

⠀⠀The gallery was full of black and white suits, tight, floor length dresses with the sounds of laughter and clinking glasses meeting his ears. It was a joyous evening, celebrating the wonderful art work created by the boss's daughter. He had never met her before but he had heard whispers, all good as no one would dare slander the name of their leader's precious little girl. You were the boss's pride and joy, thus he kept you as far away from the darker side of the family business as possible.

⠀⠀Kirishima was still a new hire, a bodyguard of sorts and would consider this his first gig. He had an idea of who he was looking for as he walked further into the mass of people admiring your work but didn't expect what he would eventually come across. You were as far away from the crowd as you possibly could be, guzzling glasses of wine and over all appearing to be a deer in headlights. He couldn't fugure out for the life of him why you seemed so frightened until he watched people approach you to talk, noticing the stutter in your voice when you replied to questions and greetings,your body language telling people to stear clear of you.

⠀⠀So, he did what he was hired to do. "Kindly step away from the lady." He said with a smile, approaching with his large arms crossing over his broad chest as he towered over the guests. They looked at him as if he were a giant shark looking to devour them before scurrying away, leaving the two of you alone. He stood quietly, listening to the voices on the other side of his ear piece as his ruby eyes scanned the area around you. He made sure to not stand so close and avoided in letting his gaze wander.

⠀⠀He couldn't help but admire your skin in quick glances, finding the spot over your eye to be quite adorable. Your silky, ask blonde hair was all dolled up for the event, light make up on your face but not enough to cover the vitiligo. You were stunning and his heart hammered against his chest. So the rumors were true.

⠀⠀You thanked him, voice quiet and careful as you set down your wine glass and clasped your hands together. Out of the corner of his eye he watched you twiddle your thumbs. You didn't want to be here, did you? This obviously wasn't your idea, how could it be? A girl like you, timid as a mouse, didn't want to be surrounded by strangers. "Miss..." He began, thinking carefully because the last thing he wanted to do was piss off the boss and likely get himself killed. But this was his job wasn't it? Making sure you were happy and safe? "Would you like to leave here for a bit? We'll come back of course, but you look like you need some air."

Extra.

He ended up taking you to a drive thru restaurant and got you whatever you wanted, letting you talk about whatever you wanted or sat quietly if you chose not to talk at all If it was quiet in the suv then that was fine too, he just wanted to help you in any way he could. Eventually the silence becomes small talk and then leads to a rather deep conversation about whatever the hell was going on inside that beautiful brain of yours. Kirishima wasn't the smartest man but he wasn't stupid, he wasn't as clueless as most thought he was. You told him how your father made you do this as an attempt to get you out there, to socialize and possibly find a suitor. This was the mafia after all.

The Confession:

⠀⠀It was a tradition now, every Sunday you and Eijirou would go to your favorite café to have coffee and enjoy the early day weather before it got too hot. You sit at the same table, in the same chairs with him facing the door. You get the same drinks and food and just overall enjoy each others company. After that night at the gallery you two became fast friends, which your father obviously had to approve of but thankfully he did. Kirishima was a good man, he's trustworthy and puts you before himself.

⠀⠀The day he approached your father and asked to speak in private was the day he knew he was likely to get thrown in the deepest, darkest depths of the ocean. He has confessed his feelings for you to your old man, who listened intently with a blank face behind his desk. "Sir, I'm in love with your daughter, and with your blessing I'd like to... court her." He was utterly terrified when your father cleared his throat and sighed, shifting where he sat so he could stand and move around the desk. He reached out for a handshake which Kirishima looked up at him with a questioning look.

⠀⠀Your father gave his blessing and now... He just had to tell you, his best friend, that he loved you. God he loved you so much— "Kiri," you interrupted his thoughts, bringing him crashing back to reality," a-are you alright? You seem nervous." He swallowed hard in response but cleared his throat, taking a sip of his cappuccino.

⠀⠀"Oh yeah— definitely." He breathed with a laugh, moving a hand to the back of his neck to scratch. How was he going to say it? "So, uh—" he licked his lips, adjusting himself in his seat multiple times until he groaned and leaned forward. "Fuck, I'm just gonna say it— Maybell, I love you. I have for a long time now and I talked to your father and he said—"

⠀⠀"Said what, Eijirou?" Your eyes widened at his confession and he felt like a complete idiot. Should he had said something to you first? Was this a mistake? What if you didn't feel the same way? God his mind was going to explode—

⠀⠀"That I could... court you. With your permission." You were quick to nod and smile to his surprise, which prompted a grin if his own.

Extra.

Kirishima HAS to be facing the door in any public place you go to. I don't make the rules.

He never let's you walk close to the road, he has to be between you and it at all times when you're walking.

He oders your food and drinks for you when you can't but is there for moral support when you do. He wants you comfortable and happy. He wouldn't ever dare get in your way though, you're a lot stronger and braver than most may think you are.

The Relationship:

⠀⠀On days like this, Kirishima can't help but admire you. He catches himself staring wuite often but he just can't help it. What did he do to deserve such a beautiful partner? He looks at you and all he can think about is how much he loves you and wants to see you smile. He watched you from the kitchen island, leaning against it as you waltz around the kitchen in your pinky fuzzy slippers and one of his shirts that's much, much too big on you. He remembers your surprise when you found his clothing was actually too big on you and how happy you were.

⠀⠀"Maybell?" He hums, adjusting his stance and crossing his arms on the counter. He listened for you to him back in response, a smile on his lips. "You look so cute in my clothes.

⠀⠀You giggled, shaking your head and continued putting the dishes away until Eijirou appeared behind you, arms wrapping around your waist and his forehead coming down on your shoulder. "Need somethin' baby?" You turned your head just slightly, a brow cocked inquisitively. He squeezed you in response, swiftly lifting you and making you squeal. Thankfully you didn't have anything in your hands at the moment. He peppered kisses all over the side of your face, setting you down only to lift you again bridal style.

⠀⠀"I've got all I need right here in my arms." He chuckled and you playfully smacked his chest, letting him carry you to your shared bedroom.

Extra.

TICKLE FIGHTS.

He thinks your sneezes are the cutest thing in the world.

He loves your god awful puns, they crack him up every time.

Adores the fact you're a nurturer, especially with your friends. He thinks you'd make a great mother but if that's something you don't want he respects that.

You take care of everyone, but who takes care of you? Eijirou is always there to be your shoulder to lean and cry on, he's your sound board and is always happy to let you talk about your feelings with him. You're allowed to not be happy and bubbly all the time, he realizes how staying positive all the time can actually do more damage than goof, especially if you bottle everything up.

If on a particular day you're struggling with your speech he's happy to be your voice as well. He understands you better than anyone, even your own father.

Speaking of your father, he can't wait to make Eijirou his son-in-law! He's a good man with a good heart and treats you right, what's not to like?

He has trouble saying no to you and spoils you quite a bit.

The Fights:

...

Extra.

There's nothing, what you say goes and all he can say is "yes dear". He knows better than to argue with you, however when he's right and he knows he is, he finds a way to prove it without making you mad.

The Sex:

⠀⠀"Fuck baby—" he hissed, hands finding your hips and guiding you as you rub yourself on his cock. Your hands are on his thighs and your head is tossed back, giving him the perfect view of your tits. God he loves them, he loves the plush skin of your stomach and your thighs, your ass too, he loved seeing all of you. He was so happy that you allow him this privilege of seeing you, granted you've been dating a while now but still. Your sounds are music to his ears and all he wants is to make more, make you feel so good you're calling his name and making a mess.

He wanted— no, needed, to feel you, to feel inside your warm and wet cunt, to feel it squeeze him and milk him dry. He was quick to flip the two of you over, careful to not hurt you as he did. You gasped and giggled, reaching up to hold his face as he smiled, leaning down to capture your lips in a searing kiss. He loved your taste, he could go on and on about all the things he loved about you all day if he could. "You want it baby?" You nodded excitedly, lip caught between your teeth. He smirked and reached between the two of you, thick fingers tracing a line between your lips and slipping inside your soaked pussy.

"D-Daddy—" you whine, a slight pout on your lips as your face morphs into one of pleasure. He chuckled, pumping his fingers in and out a few times before removing them and grabbing his cock. He coated it more in your slick, guiding it between tge lips of your cunt before slowly pushing inside, groaning at how tight you are. You squeal of course, gasping for breath because Kirishima is an impressive size, you still struggled to take him sometimes but like a good girl you always managed.

"That's my good girl." He cooed, moving so his forearms were on either side of your head. He gave a couple test thrusts, waiting for you to adjust u til you nodded for him to continue.

Extra.

Terrified of activating his quirk while he's fucking you, but he keeps himself under control.

He loves his hair pulled and he loves to be bitten, he especially likes it when you scratch his back when he hits that good spot.

Eats you out for his pleasure mostly, but for yours as well. He loves when you grind on his face and moan his name when you do it. Speaking of, please sit on his face, he loves that shit. He knows how to be careful of his teeth!

If you have pets they CANNOT be in the same roon when you're doing the do, it's just weird.

He'd happily bend you over in the kitchen and do you right there. Hell, he'll fuck you anywhere you deem suitable.

He likes to do a mixture if praise and degradation with you, and edging and overstimulation is a big go-to. He just loves seeing you squirm under him, hr loves hearing you beg and say you need him.

[retvenkos]

(This is @swanimagines with my personal account, sending on anon so there wouldn't be any misunderstandings and my regular account doesn't have this cool new askbox and it's a must since I'm a babbler, hi Olive!) Congrats again for 2.5k! Hopefully my first ask made it, your ask page started bugging after I sent it 😅 So I'd like to ask for a 🔥 ship please with uhh The Maze Runner because we finished the movies yesterday with my friend (first time for her, third for me) and she liked them + TMR has popped into my life in so many ways lately (like we talked about TMR's funny scenes with my friend while watching TV and all of a sudden The Scorch Trials began rolling on TV while we were laughing about a scene and we didn't know it was about to start 😅) and I've seen dreams about it so it just feels like something wants me to follow it 😂 + Ships are always interesting to me!

Sexuality: I'm not sure, but um, I mainly crush on men, but sometimes on women too. It's not common though. I've never dated anyone irl and I suspect I'm fictosexual (having attraction only/mainly on fictional characters) or something 😅 But yeah, I think I prefer men but women are cool with me too 😊

Personality: My MBTI is INFP-T (Turbulent Mediator), and I'm a Hufflepuff. Very awkward if I want to get to know someone (as you probably noticed). I don't like big groups and I think that at big parties you'd find me a) frozen against the wall or b) in a room where there's people who are my friends. I'm super protective of my friends and I consider them as my family. I sometimes even cut ties with people if they're mean to my friends, even if they haven't done anything to me personally. I'm not good in controlling my own emotions though if I'm angry and just blurt random things out, not even thinking and I need help from others to word myself better in those situations. But moving on from me being angry, my friends say I'm loyal and kind, and a good listener. I'm super shy with strangers but once you get to know me and if I like you, I'm loud and make a lot of bawdy jokes.

Hobbies: I have been writing stories since I was like 8 years old, I'm learning to read more books, learning to play piano, I like to play video + board games, taking long walks to the forest (when it's spring/summer/autumn) + fangirling and clowning around. When I'm old, I aspire to be a crazy guinea pig lady, I have 3 right now.

Some things I dislike: spiders, heights (I don't have a phobia, I just don't like them), anything horror (still have traumas from watching 5 seasons of SPN...) and traveling by a bus. I couldn't think of anything else that isn't, like, obvious. (Being shouted at, snobby people etc)

Bonus: 3 random facts about me:

1. I can imitate the sound of a guinea pig + a loon.

2. I have a big-ish stuffed toy dalmatian dog named Dami, he's as old as me (25yo) and I still can't sleep without it 😅 If I have to wash it, it will be a sleepless night since it takes like 24h to dry up...

3. I'm good at imagining I'm in a music video while listening to music on a walk, it makes me walk faster and even dance a little.

Thank you so much, you rock!! ❤️

hey, jenni! i did get your first ask, my askbox probably bugged because i got such an influx of requests, but i did receive it! also, the new askboxes are so cool, one day i’m going to figure out how they work and then it’s going to be all over for you guys.

and don’t worry about being awkward, the line starts behind me, heh. from what i can tell, you’re super cool and talented!

TMR:

I ship you with Newt!

now this is the highest honor i can bestow upon anyone, keep that in mind

first of all, newt would 100% sit with you on the back wall during parties - he doesn’t quite enjoy the crazy energy of parties, either, he’d much rather just have quiet conversations with you and thomas.

also, despite being really socially adept, newt manages to keep a lot of secrets - especially those secrets that make him more vulnerable - so he wouldn’t mind your shy nature - the two of you would exist in each other’s orbit for a long time before finally reaching out, and talking about the really deep things.

i 100% believe that the two of you would go on walks together, talking about whatever comes to mind and standing close enough that your hands brush and both of you kind of jump at the contact, smiling anyway. and if you ever grab his hand, he just ascends.

newt also creates deep emotional ties to people, so he totally understands your loyalty and is glad that someone cares so much about others. he’s definitely vocal in his support of his friends, so he would appreciate your support in that area.

i also just think that your general temperaments match up nicely, so the two of you would almost always get along, and you’d support the other in whatever decisions they make. newt would love how you open up once you get to know him - it would cheer him up immensely and i think that both of you would benefit from it.

also, newt is probably scared of heights, too, for obvious reasons, and that idea just makes me cry a little bit, ngl. point is, both of you would avoid heights together.

newt would love all of your chill hobbies - he definitely has hobbies that match up with yours (like board games, video games, and books). i imagine the two of you hang out a lot and just do really chill activities in the living room, swapping stories and jokes. 

and what’s great about newt is that he would never push you out of your comfort zone. if you don’t want to watch that, you don’t have to. if you don’t want to go there or do that, you won’t. newt is really good at knowing boundaries and he can have lots of fun inside of them. it doesn’t bother him in the least.

also, newt would love your passion for the things you love - listening to you talk about your interests or your goals in something he adores, especially if you mention him in your idealized future.

newt is so sentimental and such a softie, i can definitely see the two of you being the perfect couple.

take part in my 2.5k celebration

[yourkdramaanalyst]

STRANGERS FROM HELL SHORT REVIEW

"People are the most frightening above anything else."

https://t.co/bPsScVEbvM

• Introduction to the Drama

GIST:

Strangers from Hell is about Jong-u (played by Im Si Wan), an aspiring writer who moved from Busan to Seoul to start an internship offered to him by his senior. Upon looking for a cheap place to live in, he found Eden Residences. He ended up staying there, where he had creepy and suspicious neighbors including Dr. Seo Mun-jo (played by Lee Dongwook).

It is based on a webtoon series by Kim Yong-ki.

• The Experience

I can't remember the last time I watched a psychological-thriller K-drama, but this one is probably the most disturbing! The first season has 10 episodes but it took me a week to finish because it was difficult for me to watch this at one go. It was also impossible for me to have a snack while watching this drama because I am afraid I will suddenly puke. It's violent, maddening, and uncanny. If you have anxiety or mental health issues, I am warning you, this drama might be triggering for you so I advice you to refrain from watching this.

https://t.co/PlFijaJ0dn

Lee Dongwook is one of my ultimate Korean actor faves but after watching Strangers From Hell, I will never dream of him calling me "babe" anymore. In fact, I don't want anyone to ever call me "babe" from now on. He's a dentist in this drama which made it even more terrifying lol. This is the first time he played a psycho villain but it seems like this role is made for him.

(And I kinda shipped him with Im Siwan in this drama jdpshdishdis I know this is weird... sorry.)

• Points that I Liked About the Drama

1. It's totally engrossing. Even if I got scared, I didn't want to drop this K-Drama because it kept me curious about what's going to happen to the main character.

2. This K-drama has the elements I am looking for in a thriller. It's not filled with sloppy jump scares and pointless scenarios. It may look like a plotless thriller but that's not the case at all. It has a brilliant story-line.

3. It has a high quality cinematography. The camera placements and movements were meticulous. The transition from one scene to another is also satisfying. The way they cut the scenes gives an extra terrifying feel.

https://t.co/y0DIw1gXqo

4. The characters and the actors are praiseworthy. All of them are well thought. Everyone gave justice to their roles so there's nothing to complain about.

https://t.co/mPxhZc4yrn

5. Eden Residences is creepy but not in a typical way. Sure, it does not have the best facilities, but would still look quite normal if not only for the story behind it. They focused on the people living there instead, which in my opinion is a good approach.

6. It messed up my mind. Not in a bad way, though. I kept on guessing about what's going to happen next, who should be trusted and who should not, and who is going to be killed.

• The Ending

It was excellent. Though I predicted a certain part of the ending, the way the story was told was good enough to satisfy me. Until the end, the intensity did not decline, not even a bit. Overall, it didn't disappoint me.

However, I just have one single thing I keep thinking about until now. Throughout the drama, I have a question I kept on asking and for every episode I watch, I hoped that it would be answered. But, the ending came and I am still confused about that one thing. I will write about it briefly below on the "ISSUES" section which you can avoid if you don't want to read spoilers.

• Final Thoughts

Would I watch it again? Yes. On Halloween, maybe. And not by myself.

Would I recommend it? Absolutely. Despite being different from my usual K-drama picks, oddly, I still ended up liking it. If you are a person who enjoys watching thrillers, this drama may be what you're looking for.

I am giving Strangers from Hell a 8.5/ 10.

• Strangers from Hell OST

There are only 4 songs but all of them are good! And of course, all of them are creepy, too.

Strangers by The Rose

Room No. 303 by The VANE

Blow Off by Yoari

Ruin by Isaac Hong

• Issues (spoiler alert!)

I don't have a lot of issues. I just want to know why they are doing it which was not explained until the end. It bothers me because they are psychopaths living in the same place and conspiring to kill some people, an act Dr. Seo Mun-jo calls "art." Yet, there was no back story aside from the four of them being in the same orphanage together. That's why I am hoping for a second season where we could see more of what happened in the past and how they became psychopaths. I also want to know what will happen to Jong-u now that he turned into somewhat like them.

Although even without a second season, I am still completely satisfied with how it ended. Maybe that's what the writers are aiming, for viewers to keep questioning the identities of the characters.

I reviewed Strangers from Hell based only on the drama itself since I can't compare it to the webtoon series that I haven't read yet. To those who were able to finish both, how was the adaptation?

I have a lot of dramas on my plate right now so I made this one short but I did my best to write a direct and thorough review without revealing too much spoilers. I hope you enjoyed reading this! 💖💖

[lesakuraciel]

trans ask game!

original by @solareclipselgbt

1.) what’s your gender and pronouns?

nb and they/them!

2.) what does your name mean (either literally, or to you personally)

i don't feel a particular connection to my birth name, though it is based off anna karenina (it's anna corinne), but i've been toying w the idea of going by ashe... obv it's based on the tree but to me it means walking through a dappled forest near the end of winter, timeless and strange and perfect

3.) when and how did you realize you were trans?

not entirely sure, def after i figured out i wasn't straight(which was aug. 2016), but as far as accepting my place under the /trans/ flag (i knew i was nb, but was still hesitant bc of the people against enbys iding as trans), that didn't happen until like. end of last year,

4.) what was the most helpful in figuring out and accepting yourself as trans?

my trans friends definitely!! and also doing a report on enbys in the trans community, and subsequently finding what, the white stripe means, i still have trouble asking people who already know me to use they/them though,, (i still say she/her is fine even though it's kinda not)

5.) have you or do you plan on medically transitioning?

i do plan to get top surgery! and soon, hopefully!!! other than that, i eventually want a hysterectomy, but no hrt

6.) what’s something you’re most looking forward to in your transition (or something that was your favorite part of transitioning)?

no! boobs! i hate them!! and not having to wear extra layers (read: binder) in summerr

7.) do you have dyed hair?

sjsjsnd yea it's dark blue right now don't think /that's/ natural lmao i even have The Haircut (tm)

8.) who was the first person you came out to (or plan to come out to)?

i'm pretty sure it was my good friend henry!! i mean, he also basically told me i wasn't straight cause i wouldn't admit it :'>

9.) what’s your favorite season?

fall!! so many pretty colors and finally, appropiate weather for the jackets i wear year-round,

10.) have you ever been to pride?

yep! i went to pride for the first time in tacoma last year!! (plan to go to the seattle one this year)

11.) if you’re on hrt, what changes suprised you the most?

not on hrt!

12.) what gives you the most gender euphoria?

oh being called "sir" definitely, and a xloae second is when strangers use they/them to refer to me!

13.) do you have a specific piece of clothing thats especially gender affirming to you?

hmm i mean my binder obv but other than that, certain shirts when i bind? idk they just Do(tm)

14.) what’s your favorite trans joke or meme?

friend who is very comfortable in their identity: talks abt someone not realizing and being transphobic around them/other people not knowing how trans things work/etc.

(sarcasm) wow i can't believe you're really a cishet

15.) if you’ve had any gender affirming surgeries, how was your experience? what are the biggest positive effects?

not had surgery yet, but kaiser permanante has been great so far in working w me !!!

16.) do you have any piercings?

haha just one in each ear, and i basically never use those

17.) who’s your favorite trans character? or do you have any characters you headcanon as trans?

we stan lup from taz in this house

other than that, i hc a lot of characters as trans! e.x. bakugo, todoroki, and kirishima (bnha), snufkin (moomins), indrid and angus (taz), and like, a lot more,,

18.) what do you wish other people understood better about being trans?

just. it's okay to ask pronouns. god

better to ask than to assume

also use context clues, jesus (like if someone isn't out, they may switch to a diff name for some people. never use it unless they ask you to)

19.) top 5 fav songs?

bohemian rhapsody - queen

oi - carbon leaf

light in the hallway - ptx

ocean city - anthony ramos (this isn't anywhere but soundcloud but it's So Good???? go listen)

wait for it - hamilton soundtrack

20.) what advice would you give your younger self?

you can be more assertive about being trans, most people are good abt it and those who aren't can learn or fuck right off

21.) do you have any pets?

yep! my baby, friend

and my doggo, kody!

22.) do you find yourself fitting into gender roles, or consider yourself gender non-conforming?

def gnc!! i like to be androgynous, whixh usually means wearing masc clothes bc i still present fem, somehow,

23.) are you part of your schools gsa or any lgbt organizations?

nope! i prefer to make friends by just chatting, and they usually end up being non-cishwt anyhow lmao

24.) any trans role models?

not really tbh, i see a lot of people that i want to emulate, but i can't think of any in particular atm.

now that i think abt it though, my friend henry has been a sort of guiding light in figuring out, accepting, and then loudly proclaiming my identity, bc i've def come a long way since sophomore year! (if you're reading this, thank u henry)

25.) did you go through multiple gender identities before figuring out your gender now?

yep! i id'ed as genderflux very shortly, then demigirl for a long time, and finally nb/genderqueer!

26.) what makes you most proud to be part of the trans community?

it's so positive and uplifting!! i love that people are just, kind to others that's v nice

27.) favorite movie growing up?

princess bride was and is my favorite movie, but mulan was my fav disney movie and well, if that was someone's fav movie and they ended up cishet? i'd be surprised

28.) if you went by multiple names before deciding your current name, which was the first?

n/a

29.) do you have any pride merch or pride related tattoos?

i have a rainbow flag (handheld) on my bookshelf, and a genderqueer one behind my bed (big)! i also have a trans flag shawl that i made, pan flag converse, several pride shirts, and a pride hat! i'm not shy about letting everyone know i'm neither straight nor cis lmao

30.) if you experience dysphoria, what do you find helps you the most?

binding definitely helps! i get mild dysphoria wearing anything other than a binder or sports bra, and also on my period :/

31.) do you have any siblings, friends, or family who are also trans?

@dorkryptos is my friend and so is henry!! none of my family is though ):

32.) which gender roles or cis beliefs do you find most ridiculous?

nail polish is feminine?? deodorant and razors are gendered???? flowy things are feminine????? guys can't have style beyond Tux(tm)????????????????? fuck all that noise

35.) if cis people didn’t exist for a day, what would you do?

33.) how did you decide on your current name?

go out and make some new friends! ^^

34.) do you fit any trans stereotypes?

i have dyed hair and That haircut, i'm fairly short and afab, i mostly wear ""masc"" clothes, i'm in high school, etc. etc.

ahah, i didn't? but w ashe i wanted smthn with the same initial, old-timey, and connected to nature

only like, every single trans nb stereotype,

[got-to-love-a-badboy]

Runaway chapter 2

Sarah wake to find something in her bed, she rolled over and lifted the covers, "ahh" screamed little voice, "morning baby girl!" Sarah smiles as her daughter made her way to the top of the bed, "hi mommy!" Said the little girl as she snuggled down next to her mommy.

After a while the two girls headed to the kitchen, Sarah put Katie at her little chair and table and turned cartoons on for her, then she headed to the kitchen to make herself a coffee and Katie's breakfast, "can you make me a cup?" She heard as Chloe came in to the kitchen and headed over to Katie, "morning monster" Chloe said to her ruffling her hair, "what you watching?" Katie looked at the tv then back at Chloe, "it's DORA!" She shouted in excitement.

After breakfast Sarah went for a shower and to get dressed, she opted for a knee length body on dress and some white vans with her hair on beach waves.

——Texts, DownUnder and sarebear ——

DownUnder- Morning, sorry if iv woken you doll but you said to text when I was in. Iv just landed I'm grabbing my bags now.

Sarebear- oh no it's fine iv been up a while, yay exciting! I have a key for your apartment so il go open up soon and il meet you there, see you soon.

DownUnder- Great, thank you for been so welcoming Sarah

       ————————————-

Sarah walked in to the living room on her phone, "Who are you texting!" Chloe asked, "Oh it's Dacre saying he's landed, I'm going over soon to unlock the apartment and meet him, are you ok with Katie?" She asked not looking up from her phone, "first of all yes stop asking if I'm ok it's my job! and second, dude have you seen Dacre Montgomery before!?" Sarah looked at her best friend and smiled, "thank you, and yes I may have googled him lastnight, at least we will have something to look at on set" the two girls giggled. Chloe saw her friend smiling while she was texting.

"Sarah it's been 2 years, you think you could be ready to look at men again?" She asked sounding hopeful, Sarah sighed "I mean yeah maybe but come on look at him he's not going to look in my general direction is he" Chloe shot up off of the sofa "hey! No don't do this to yourself you are a total babe alright! Do not sell yourself short! I love you and I want to see you happy, I can't promise I won't match make now you have said your ready but what ever" the girls laughed again.

"Chloe you exhaust me sometimes" Sarah laughed "I'm going to unlock their apartment make sure it's all ready he should be here in 10 minutes, il be back in a bit Katie, Aunty Chlo will watch Dora with you! Love you pumpkin!" Sarah said as she was walking out of the door, "love youuuuu mamaaaa!" Katie shouted after her.

———— In the apartment ————-

Sarah walked in to the stranger things apartment and made sure all the doors were open so he could see inside, checked all the beds were made, she opened the back balcony door ready to show him the view, then she went and poured 2 glasses of water, she was drinking hers when the door bell rang, she put her glass down and bolted for the door. She took a breath before opening the door finding herself more nervous than usual.

"Hey Sarah nice to meet you" dacre said dropping her bags and drawing her in to a hug, "so nice to meet you Dacre" Sarah smiled back at him, "come on in il show you around" Sarah said moving back for him, "how was the flight?" She asked him, "good, long and tiring but good" he smiled at her, "yeah I can imagine let me show you around then you can get settled and chill out before all the idiots show up" she joked with him.

They made their way to the living room, "so obviously this is the living room the guys spend most of their time in here because it's so big uh then at the back there is the kitchen" she said as she walked through to the kitchen, "this is nice, great view" Dacre said looking out of the window, "yeah it's pretty cool" Sarah smiles heading out on to the balcony with Dacre behind her. "That's my apartment just nextdoor" She told him, "how come you don't live here with everyone else, if you don't mind me asking" Dacre asked feeling rude and regretting he's question as soon as he said it, Sarah smiles at him and bit the her bottom lip, this was her downfall with guys the part that pushed them away instantly "uh ... I tried living here last year but it was just too much because I ... I have a daughter, she's nearly 2 and a half, and we kind of got in the way you know, when people are up late having fun and stuff I was been a party pooper asking people to keep it down because she was asleep, it was just easier for us to move across the hall" she said smiling at him and looking away, "Wow really, you don't look old enough to be a mom, but well done you for achieving so much while been a mom, I bet she's proud of you" Dacre smiled at her not taking he's eyes off of her, "wow thank you, that.. that means a lot actually it's not been easy" Sarah smiled back at him, "I bet" he said, Then it went quiet.

"so let me show you the bedrooms" Sarah headed back inside and let out a deep breath after breaking the silence.

They headed upstairs and Sarah showed him all of the bedrooms and telling him the end one would be he's, it was smaller than the others but it had a balcony, "I have this room next-door, I needed the balcony" she told him "yeah I'm happy with it I would choose a balcony over space too" they both smile at eachother, "il show you the rest then il get out of your hair and you can do what you need to do".

After showing him the bathroom and laundry room they headed downstairs, "so that's the apartment, I'm going to head back over to mine, there is some food in the fridge if your hungry, but il be over the hall if you need anything or text me" she smiled at him again before he pulled her in for another hug, "thank you so much for this Sarah, and it was so nice meeting you, il see you later?" He pulled back from the hug and rubbed the back of he's neck, "yeah of course, bye Dacre" he watched her as she walked in to her apartment "Bye Sarah" they smiled at eachother.

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Sarmills are you ready for more Lilly Harrington! I am! Plus she's the hotter sibling 😜St season 2 here we come!

User 3 - 😍😍 she's amazing!

Uncle_jezzy Oh really! You went there!

Gatenm123 - she's got a point Keery!

Dacremontgomery 😍

User 4 what the! ^^^^

Nattyiceofficial - I second that #LillyisLife!

User 5 ugh really worst character on st 😒

Sadiesinks_ @user5 not required thanks! She's a babe!

Coco that's my best friend 😍 wcw!

[news-mashable-yahoopartner-blog]

I don't miss being single, but I do miss swiping

In our Love App-tually series, Mashable shines a light into the foggy world of online dating. Just in time for cuffing season.

There was a time in my life when I wanted nothing more than to get off dating apps. 

Back when I was in my twenties, I thought that dating apps were the end of our culture and the precipitating factor behind all my pain. Too sad to get up in the morning? It's probably because XxGothGirlxX never responded to my very funny OkCupid message that referenced Foxfire (seriously, who else could she find who knew that movie?). Too anxious to eat? Well, that's because I wasn't getting enough Tinder matches. Everyone on there was clearly threatened by my extraordinarily clever bio.

The truth was that dating apps could make me sad, but they could also provide intense, immensely satisfying bursts of narcissistic pleasure. 

Some part of me will always long for my swiping days of yore.

SEE ALSO: House hunting apps make me want to gouge my eyes out

To be clear (especially to my girlfriend who is probably reading this post right now), I don't long for being single at all. There are people who are perfectly happy living life without a partner and that's wonderful. I, however, am not one of them.

I don't miss the days of microwaving Morningstar Farms chicken nuggets, now that I come home to a partner who cares about her lifespan and making food that's actually supposed to go in your body. I don't ever want to go on a date again with someone obsessed with reading me sections from her  dissertation on queer performance theory and Weimar Republic clown art. I want to go home to my  partner who ... doesn't do that.

[Trigger warning for extreme cheesiness] I'm in a happy, loving relationship, and I'm not interested in turning back the clock.

Here's what I do miss about dating apps:

1. It was a place to feel superior

I wasn't the hottest ticket on OkCupid by a long shot. What I was, however, was a snob. I felt such a gross tug of superiority when I saw people list Fight Club as their favorite book or listed traveling as one of their favorite hobbies in their Tinder bio. Never mind that I actually liked both of those things — I would never dare to be that unoriginal and write them down in my profile. 

I'm not proud of this particular part of my history, but I'm not going to deny that this feeling once existed.

2. There was something to swipe on when I was bored waiting for the train

We all need activities to satisfy our minuscule attention spans. Reading is great. Swiping? Even better. I once loved the feeling of euphoria I got from making a match, even if I didn't like the person on the other end. 

Nowadays, I'm forced to go on Twitter to keep my brain engaged. Compared to Tinder and OkCupid, it's a devastatingly depressing platform. I'd much rather be turned down by a bunch of self-professed Slytherins on Tinder than read about Sen. Lindsey Graham's latest emotional outburst.

3. I had a home for my hottest selfies

Every once in a while, I'll get a haircut that I think looks good, and I'll want to post it somewhere. My girlfriend, who is a better person than me, is automatically supportive. I feel awkward about posting a sexy selfie on Instagram, where old coworkers follow me. Does my old boss who I worked with in foster care really want to see me making duck lips? She does not.

To get my full high, I need the affirmation of strangers. If I was on Tinder, I'd have the space to indulge my crudest, most narcissistic impulses.

4. It was a place to get style inspo

Without the internet, I'd probably dress entirely out of the L.L. Bean catalogue. Nothing makes me happier than a well-crafted New England loafer. 

As a queer person, Tinder is where I used to go for sartorial inspiration. There aren't that many style blogs out there for gender non-conforming folks, so the best way to search out queer style is by scrolling through queer people on dating apps. 

Tinder is the reason I have a floral bomber jacket today. For that, I am grateful.

5. It forced me to write funny jokes

Some of my best comedic material is in my 2009 OkCupid profile. Before I was able to write for the internet, I wrote for an audience of potential girlfriends on OkCupid. Folks, I killed it — at least with my *sassy* copy.

Nowadays, most of my writing on social media is limited to calling people fascists or using the vomit emoji to describe the subway system. 

OkCupid and Tinder held me to a higher editorial standard than Twitter. 

6. I got a lot of great recommendations

My music taste is mostly limited to music you'll find on Now That's What I Call Music. Thanks to OkCupid, I was able to browse the music interests of people who were far cooler than me. Love my Apple Music playlists? You can thank the OkCupid community of 2005. 

The same goes for film and television. Before OkCupid, I was watching the same episodes of The L Word over and over again. Now I have an expanded range of crap I watch on the reg.

7. Tinder and OkCupid brought me community

I'm ashamed to admit this, but online dating gave me most of my current network of friends. It can be hard to find friends in the queer community, which, statistically, is much smaller than the straight population. Often on Tinder or OkCupid, I'd find people just looking for friends, and I'd go out and befriend them (assuming we were compatible/they weren't too serious about astrology).

People I once dated became close friends. Heck, people I met for half a beer became best friends. 

For all of the despair dating apps gave me, they still gave me this. 

Listen — assuming my girlfriend reads this post and doesn't dump me, I'll never go back. But I can still manage to be grateful.

More from Love App-tually

My terrible online dates live on as zombies on Instagram

Finstas make online dating so much more complicated

The rise of the Tinder-themed wedding

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