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ggukiepie · 11 months

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one of your girls (pt. 2) (jungkook x reader)

we go 'round again, we jump back in bed that's what you do when you love somebody these bad omens, i look right through them that's what you do when you love somebody bad omens by 5sos

pairing: jungkook x fem oc

tags: smut, angst, fluff, fuckboy!jk, fwb rel, oc is...she thinks with her heart <//3, college au, jungkook is sus and a bit mean but is oc any better ? hmmmm

warnings: kissing, fingering, protected sex, mirror kink, backshots wooo but make it romantic, light choking, multiple orgasms, a little bit of aftercare, cuddling :o

word count: 6k

a/n: weeeee part 2 is finally here !! sorry this took so long yall. i have two more parts to release for this series (flashback then part 3). anw happy reading !! uhhhhhh the ending..dont scream at me :D / part 1 / drabble i (flashback)

taglist: @yuwaimo @haileycannotcometothephonern @hoseokteardrop @hoodrejects @agrika @joonwater @moonchild1

..••°°°°••..°°••....••°°..••°°°°••..

It's sunny today which calls for hanging out at the quad. It's what you and your friends usually do to take advantage of the rare warm days. Jihyo's busy bickering with Mingyu, you don't know what they're really talking about because you're busy re-writing your notes. You haven't seen Jimin yet but he texted the group chat saying he's just buying food. And Jungkook...well you don't know if he's going to show up today. You haven't talked to him since that night. It's just been three days anyway.

You feel someone sit down beside you and you notice it's Jimin. He's wearing those skinny jeans he loves so much because he says it makes his ass look nice. You roll your eyes every time he mentions that.

"Cool guy alert," Mingyu suddenly calls out. You whip your head up to stare at Jimin who's wearing the biggest pair of sunglasses you've ever seen, it's covering half of his face already.

"Too sunny for you, Jiminie?" Jihyo teases this time.

You all watch Jimin silently as he removes the sunglasses. His left eye is bruised and it's ugly and purple and almost black.

"What the fuck," Jihyo says to break the silence. "What happened to you?"

Jimin doesn't say anything yet, just simply fixes his hair and shakes his head. You can tell he's trying not to get angry because his jaw is clenched.

"Jimin?" you whisper.

"It was Jungkook," he says gruffly. Your heart stops again at the mention of his name. Why would Jimin and Jungkook fight? Their friendship is pretty solid and they always get along well. You've never seen them annoyed at each other.

Your eyes flit to Mingyu and you think he knows what happened because he's silent, no hint of surprise on his face. He's looking down at the table while playing with his food.

"You guys never fight," Jihyo interjects. "What happened?"

Jimin turns to face you and you suddenly think you know why. You don't want to say it yourself but you think you've got an inkling why Jungkook punched him. You just hope you're wrong.

"You need to talk to him," Jimin tells you, completely ignoring Jihyo's question. You nod silently and check your phone to see if Jungkook has texted you at all. Of course he hasn't. Typical. But you'll find him today. You don't know exactly what went down but Jimin telling you to find him confirms your suspicions. It's enough to get you mad, your body heating and tensing up in simmering anger. You don't mind what Jungkook does to you, how he hurts your feelings without intending to, how he treats you like you're some disposable object, like you're just there always on the sidelines waiting for him. What you can't tolerate is Jungkook bringing both your friends into your situationship. What goes on between you and Jungkook should stay between you both and that's it. You can't handle him hurting Jimin as well.

There are a few places where you think Jungkook might be. You walk to the cafeteria first and search for him in the crowd. He's not there so you head to the library instead and your heart drops the moment you see him talking to some girl.

"Hey," you practically shout, suprising the people in the library and yourself as well, even. You're usually never this angry. Never address someone in such a venomous way. But you can't help but feel irked at what Jungkook's done.

He looks back and his eyes widen at your angry form. It only lasts for a second before he smirks and walks closer to you.

"Yeah?" he says, all smug and cocky.

"We need to talk."

Then you turn around and start walking out of the library, could hear Jungkook walking behind you already. Girl he was talking to all forgotten.

Surprisingly, you end up at his place.

You walk into his living room, ignoring him when he tells you to take a seat on the couch.

"Did you punch Jimin?" you ask right away, wanting to get this stupid issue over with.

You watch as his jaw clenches, tongue poking the inside of his cheek. He looks at you for a moment, eyes in slits at your hostility. "And what if I did?"

"What the fuck was that, Jungkook?" You look at him with stern eyes and could tell he's angry as well, chest rising up and down in quick breaths.

"Don't mess with my friends," he says.

"Jimin is my friend too!" you retort. "What happens between me and Jimin has nothing to do with you."

"Just—"

"Just what, Jungkook?" you cut him off. "You had no right to punch Jimin like that. Why'd you even do it in the first place?" You place your hands on your hips as you wait for him to answer you, puffing out a breath in frustration.

He looks a bit lost, eyes darting from side to side to look for an answer. The longer the silence goes, the shorter your patience gets.

"Well?" you prompt.

"Just don't, alright?" he says lamely. You roll your eyes. "You can sleep with anyone else except—"

"Who the fuck gave you the right to tell me who I can and can't sleep with?" You're almost screaming now but you don't care. This push and pull with Jungkook is making you so angry you want to punch him. You walk up to him and shove at his chest but he barely stumbles back. It just angers you even further. "I don't even give you shit when you sleep with other girls!" You continue pushing him back, practically punching his chest now. "It's not like you agreed to be exclusive. You said it yourself that you still wanted to fuck around. That was the agreement."

Jungkook grabs your wrists to stop you from pushing him. You watch him clench his jaw as he makes eye contact with you. "What if I want to take back what I said?"

"What?" you mumble dumbly, all the fight leaving your body.

He lets go of your wrists and takes a step back. You watch him pace back and forth in his room. "What if I want us to be exclusive?"

You say the first thing that comes to mind. "You're lying." He must be. He's just trying to lure you in, get him on your good side again.

He looks at you dead in the eyes and it seems like all the anger and frustration is leaving his body as well. He looks defeated and tired, and you're sure you look the same. "I'm not. I never lie to you."

"You do, Kook," you say quietly. But you're not saying it to make him feel bad. You're simply saying it because it's the truth and both of you know that.

He sits down beside you on his bed and buries his face in his hands. You watch him and try to keep your tears at bay.

"Kook, if this is some sick joke—"

"It's not," he says all of a sudden. "What if I want us to be exclusive?" he tries again.

You don't like it when he looks at you like that. Like you matter to him. Like he actually cares. Like he feels the same way as you. Looking into his eyes is too much so you turn your head away and stare at the wall instead.

"Why?" you whisper.

"Because..." he tries. "Because—"

"Because what, Kook? Suddenly you don't like the idea of me sleeping with other guys? But you can sleep with other girls? And if I say yes to you, what'll happen then?" you say harshly. "Huh? You're gonna forget about me? Just use me whenever you want?"

"It's not like that, sweetheart." He tries grabbing your hand but you shake him off. You stand up and walk to the other side of the room, suddenly wanting to be away from him. Being near Jungkook clouds your senses and makes you act irrationally.

"Don't call me that." You feel your lips trembling and you're pretty sure tears are streaming down your face. "I don't know what you want from me, Jungkook. You can't even explain why you want us to be exclusive."

He mirrors your expression, big doe eyes suddenly teary as well. "I'm sorry," he chokes out. It stays silent after that. You nod to yourself. Maybe this is the best explanation you'll get. You gather your things and mumble a goodbye. You exit his bedroom and Jungkook doesn't chase after you. At this point you don't expect him to anymore. You bump into Mingyu and Jihyo upon exiting Jungkook's apartment. They call out to you but you ignore them and speed walk out of the building.

Your heart hurts. Like, it physically hurts. You know you should feel happy with what Jungkook's just told you. It's what you wanted ever since you fell for him. But why are you pushing away? Why don't you want to believe him all of a sudden?

Because you used to. Believe him, that is. Used to look at him all starry eyed with whatever he said. Said yes to whatever he asked. Looked at him like he can achieve world peace. Something stupid of the sort. Wore your heart on your sleeve every time you were with him. Even when you weren't, now that you think about it.

You always showed your feelings through your actions. He just showed his feelings through his words.

It's different but it's the same. This time you don't believe him. Stopped believing his words some time ago. Always knew there was some lie beneath his words. Always doubted what he said. Or just brushed it over your shoulder. Never let it settle in the crevices of your heart, which is sadly just filled with him. Him, him, him.

Jungkook, Jungkook, Jungkook.

You should feel sorry for yourself for how much he's changed you without even trying to directly. You never thought you'd have to change yourself for a man. But here he is, making you doubt him and the world. You were never like this before.

You thought love was easy. That if it was the right person, everything would fall into place naturally. You didn't know love would be like this. That you'd always be cautious, always had your walls up, looking over your shoulder. That you had to fight for love, or that it hurt so much you found difficulty in breathing.

But is Jungkook the right person?

It's not something you want to answer yourself, because you'll get hurt either way. You just brush the thought aside like you do with your feelings.

You don't go back to your apartment because you know Jihyo thinks it'll be the first place you go to. Will barge in your room because she has a spare key. Is confrontational and protective of you like that, she'll ask questions right away.

But you don't want to think of what just transpired. You want to forget. Move on. Not sure if that means moving on from Jungkook entirely (you doubt you ever will) but you just want to forget about today.

So you keep walking. No destination in mind, you just let your feet walk you to wherever. Away from campus. Walking through some random park. Eventually, you end up at a Korean BBQ. Don't realize the meaning this place holds till you're seated. It's Jungkook's favorite restaurant. He brought you here twice.

Now you're here alone. You start feeling pathetic. Who the fuck goes to a restaurant like this alone? You scan the area—you see couples, friends, families eating together. But you're alone which means you have to grill the meat alone. Serve yourself. Eat by yourself.

You order two bottles of soju. Might as well be drunk while looking pathetic.

You think you've made a good decision. The food is good and you're doing everything yourself so you have no time to think about other things. Or people. Person.

You flip the meat only to see that you've flipped it too early. It's not properly cooked yet. Jungkook always knew when to flip it at the right time.

You sigh. That was what, twenty minutes of him being out of your head? At least it's progress. Somewhat.

After a while you decide you can't inhale anymore food. You'll probably explode. But a happy tummy is a happy heart. Or whatever people say. You're drunk, can't think straight. You're drunk but not stupid, so you ask Jihyo if she can pick you up.

She simply replies otw and is outside the restaurant ten minutes later. She comes in full force—which is really just Mingyu and Jimin with her in the car. It's Mingyu's car, anyway, so you expected to see him. You don't know why Jimin's with them, but you don't mind. Seeing your group of friends eases the ache in your heart even more. Even though one person's missing.

You don't mind. Well, just a little.

You smile at them as you walk to the car while Jihyo runs out of it to give you a big hug. She doesn't say anything as she rubs your back soothingly and you don't cry on her shoulder like you normally would. You're too tired of crying. Being sad.

You don't say anything as the both of you get back in the car. They don't ask about what happened and for that you're grateful. You don't want to process it yet, anyway. Don't think there's much to process. You love Jungkook and he doesn't love you back. Simple.

Your friends fill in the quiet pretty well. Jimin goes off on some tangent. You don't really know the topic. But Jihyo's interjecting from time to time. Mingyu makes a joke and it has all of you laughing. Eventually you get to Jimin's place. It's the usual hangout spot. A one bedroom apartment with a nice balcony. Not too big but not too small either. Just right for the four of you.

Usually five.

You don't know what transpired after you left Jungkook's place. How Mingyu and Jihyo saw you running out with tears down your cheeks. You don't know and you don't ask. You all watch a movie together. All fall asleep in Jimin's living room. Will complain about your backs hurting the next morning but you don't care. It's nice to be around them.

You leave Jimin's place the morning after. You, Mingyu and Jihyo leave because Jimin shoos all of you out. Says he has an exam to study for. He'll probably complain about it during lunch. Tuesdays are reserved for lunch with each other. Out on the quad, if it's sunny enough. In the cafeteria otherwise. You're not sure if Jungkook will show up. You doubt he will.

Mingyu and Jihyo walk you home. You shower and get ready for class. You move as if you're on autopilot. Shower. Get dressed. Get the right textbooks. Lock your door. Walk to class.

You put yourself in this bubble, in this false sense of security that things are ok. You'll be okay. You've been through a lot and you're still here standing, breathing, living. This? This is nothing.

You just have to give yourself time. Have to push your feelings away. Out of sight, out of mind. Don't think it works like that when it's about your feelings. Whatever. Your heart will mend itself back to place.

But what makes a heart whole? It's people, mostly. It's your friends. Your family.

Jungkook.

Always gonna be Jungkook.

And you're back at square one.

..••°°°°••..°°••....••°°..••°°°°••..

jk (sent two weeks ago): can we talk?

jk (sent one week ago): hi

jk (sent one week ago): can we talk pls?

jk (sent five days ago): y/n?

jk (sent three days ago): im so sorry, y/n. i just want to talk. please.

..••°°°°••..°°••....••°°..••°°°°••..

It's been two weeks since the incident and your group hasn't been complete ever since. Either Mingyu and Jihyo are with Jungkook, or with you. Things are starting to change for the worse, and it's making you sad.

At least Jimin and Jungkook have made up already. You don't know the details exactly (because you didn't ask), but you've heard that they've started hanging out again.

You and Jungkook?

You haven't replied to any of his texts. You haven't seen him for two weeks. It's weird. It feels like there's something wrong, something off. Like there's a small pebble in your shoe. Like there's a nagging voice in your head telling you to go back home because you forgot to unplug your straightener.

Like you're missing a piece of you. This hole in your chest that leaves you feeling empty.

You miss Jungkook. And not just the sex. You also miss the friendship. The intimate moments.

You don't have the courage to ask about him, to text him back or look for him. Frankly, you're still hurt from what transpired and you think you might just break if he hurts you again.

It's even raining today. The cold and gloomy weather dampens your mood even more. You baked cookies to try to cheer you up. You used to love baking but haven't done so in a while, you're not really sure why. But you needed an extra pick me up today.

You're holding the tupperware of cookies close to your chest when you walk in the cafeteria, looking for your friends. You always bake extra for them—love the looks on their faces when Jihyo counts all the cookies first and divides it accordingly, when Mingyu gets more than what he should have, when they all fight over the last piece.

When Jungkook would ask if you had extra cookies back at your place.

You don't think that'll happen anymore.

You spot your friends by a table in the corner of the cafeteria, next to a large window where the rain hits it outside in a steady patter.

You see Mingyu who's taking to Jimin, Jihyo typing something on her laptop.

And there's the missing piece, beanie-clad head hung low, tattooed hand busy writing on his notebook.

You feel your heart lurch in your chest. You stop walking, not minding that you're blocking the way.

You take deep breaths to calm your nerves. You have to see each other at some point. And also, you don't want your friends to feel awkward anymore.

You continue walking again and because the universe wants to torture you even further, the only available seat left is right across Jungkook.

"Hi," you chirp, trying to sound as cheery as you can as you sit down. Mingyu, Jihyo and Jimin all look at you in surprise, then Jimin starts talking about his day to fill in the awkward silence. The three of them try to make things go back to normal. You would've laughed at the looks of your friends' faces (sans Jungkook, because you refuse to look at him) if you didn't feel so nervous.

You join in the conversation as well, not an ounce of sadness shown on your face. You don't want your situation with Jungkook to affect the rest of your friends.

The both of you never address each other directly, but you do feel him looking at you from time to time.

You place the cookies in the middle of the table. Like old times, Jihyo counts all the cookies and tells everyone they can only have three pieces each. Mingyu eats more than three. The three of them fight over the last piece, Jimin proposing that they battle it out through rock paper scissors.

You're laughing at the scene in front of you. Good thing you saved some for yourself back at your apartment.

Amidst the chaos, you feel Jungkook lean over the table to whisper in your ear.

"You got more cookies back at yours?"

Your body stiffens at the proximity. Usually you'd say yes. He'd follow you home, make some small talk while you place cookies in a ziplock for him, then he'd hug you goodbye.

That was before the agreement. It was essentially the same routine when you started sleeping with each other, though of course he'd stay a little bit longer.

You turn your head and look at him for the first time. You will yourself not to cry, to steel your emotions.

He looks so soft, so comfy like he just rolled out of bed. He's wearing a beanie to tame his curls, and he's wearing one of his oversized shirts paired with gray sweatpants.

He smells good too. And you realize that you really, really miss him.

"Yeah," you say just as quietly. You feel your heart lighten, but your head's screaming at you to reject him.

Jungkook doesn't say anything else and neither do you. You wait for your friends to finish eating and once everyone stands up, Jungkook walks to your side. Jihyo looks at you quizzically but you just shake your head, silently telling her not to voice out anything out loud. You say your goodbyes and start walking towards your apartment, Jungkook right beside you.

It's silent. And a little bit awkward. You're thinking of what to tell him, whether he wants to talk about what happened, or he just wants your damn cookies.

You close the door behind the both of you and you immediately walk to your small kitchen, grabbing the container of extra cookies and putting some in a ziplock, like you usually do. You feel from the corner of your eyes that Jungkook's watching you, and you feel like your heart is about to burst at what he might say.

"About that night..." he starts.

You sigh and drop the cookies on the counter, turning to him to look at him directly. For the first time in a while, Jungkook looks nervous. Fingers fidgeting, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

"You know I like you, right?" you suddenly say.

"Yeah," he answers right away without a beat of hesitation.

"Then I want to stop whatever it is we have between us."

You watch Jungkook's face for his reaction. How his eyes widen, how he clenches and unclenches his fists, how his chest rises up and down in quick beats.

"Why?" he simply asks.

You bite your lip in thought, thinking of the right words to say. "I can't let you treat me like shit anymore, Jungkook. It's not healthy for the both of us. I don't know how you feel or what you want but look," you sigh. "You punched Jimin because what? Because I slept with him?"

"What if I want us to try?"

Now it's your turn for your eyes to widen, for your heart to lurch in your chest, body seizing at the question. Acting the same way you did when he asked the first time.

"Try?"

Jungkook nods, lips pursed as he walks closer to you. "You and me. Let's try. No more fooling around with other people." He swears under his breath as he comes to stand in front of you, both arms caging you against the counter. He breathes out and rests his forehead against yours, eyes closed like he's tired.

You're tired as well. But you let him do what he wants. Like you always do.

"(Y/N)," he starts to say. "Look, I— The thought of you sleeping with someone else... It made me crazy," he laughs dryly.

You lean back and scrunch your eyebrows at him. "Jungkook, I'm not some object for you to be possessive over. You just can't—"

"I don't mean it like that," he says, looking at you directly now. Your knees would've buckled at the intensity of his gaze were it not for your body leaning on the kitchen counter. "I just mean..." He turns his head to look away. "I just mean I can't bear the thought of you being with someone else anymore. Doing the things we do."

You open your mouth in reply then close it again when you realize you don't know what to say. You've been waiting to hear this confession for so long, but now that you've heard it, you're suddenly not happy. You're unsure. Guarded. Hurt.

"Jungkook," you whisper unsurely.

He turns his head back to you, gaze right on your lips before he locks eyes with you again.

"We can try. Please," he whispers. It's weird seeing Jungkook this way, all vulnerable and desperate. Begging. Usually, you'd be in his position. Not the other way around. "I promise this time."

You feel your resolve slowly crumbling. All the walls you've built up from your last interaction with him come falling down. You should hate yourself, you really should. But you know where your heart lies. What it wants. That you'd take any inkling of love he'd give you. Even if he may not mean it. Even if it might not last forever.

"Okay," you say, and the moment you do, you see the most beautiful smile grace his face. It makes you smile as well, ignoring the little voice in the back of your head to say no. "But we start slowly, alright?"

He nods his head, smile still there, body slowly pressing against yours. He nuzzles his head in the crook of your neck and your arms automatically go around him.

"Kook," you sigh. "We should probably talk first—"

"In the morning, baby," he says in between the kisses he's placing on your shoulder. "I promise."

You play with his hair while Jungkook does what he wants. Kissing your shoulder, your collarbone, up to your jaw. It's playful at first, big smooches echoing in your apartment. Then it starts getting heated the moment you feel his tongue on your skin.

"J-Jungkook," you stutter.

He grips your waist and lifts you up so you're seated on the counter. "You drive me crazy, I hope you know that."

You smile at him and say nothing else as you grab his face towards yours, finally reconnecting your lips with his. It's soft and sensual, no sense of urgency like how you usually kiss. Like how Jungkook had somewhere to be after. Or that he wanted to get it over with.

He's taking his time now by the way his lips mold slowly against yours, like he wants to map out how you taste, how you feel, how your tongue feels like pressed against his.

You stay like that for a while, just kissing and basking in each other's presence. Jungkook holds your waist firmly like he doesn't want to let go. Frankly, you don't want him to either.

You start getting antsy so you grab the hem of his shirt and try to slip it over his head. He laughs at your impatience as you throw the shirt somewhere in your apartment, hands going to his back instantly. Scratching your nails lightly down his skin, leaving goosebumps in its wake. Then your hands go down to his pants and you start toying with his jeans.

"Sweetheart," he leans back and chuckles. He holds your face gently. "There's no need to rush, okay? We've got all the time in the world."

You lean back as well, exhaling the breath you didn't know you were holding. "Okay," you agree. "Yeah, sorry."

"Let me take my time with you," he murmurs as he leans in again to kiss you.

Jungkook does his take time. Practically kisses every inch of your skin. Takes off your clothing one by one. Fingers you slowly that you're seeing stars. Cleans you up with his mouth that you're left breathless and dizzy. Disoriented. You're both (finally) naked by the time you're in bed.

"Look at yourself, baby," he whispers right into your ear.

His words go in your ear and out the other, head too clouded with the mind blowing orgasm he just gave you. You don't understand what he's telling you to do until he gently grabs your chin and turns it to where he wants you to look. Your eyes spot your full length mirror. You see yourself, bare and sitting on the bed with your legs folded beneath you, thighs open and pussy on display. Jungkook's right behind you in a similar position, body so big and wide that you notice the stark difference of your bodies.

You see your chest heaving up and down, tits moving in sync with your breaths. Your hands are resting on his thighs. Jungkook slithers his arm to wrap around your waist. Finally, you lock eyes with him through the mirror.

"See?" he says, though you don't really know what he wants you to see. "You look so pretty. S'why I can't get enough of you."

"Oh," you breathe out.

"Yeah, oh," Jungkook chuckles lightly. "Gonna fuck you now, okay?"

You nod your head in reply and Jungkook lifts you up a bit to enter you from behind. You gasp when he fills you up right away, a perfect fit like always. He starts thrusting slowly but deeply, and you feel his tip kiss your cervix each time. You would've toppled forward were it not for his protective hold around your waist.

"Feels good," you finally moan out.

"I know, baby," he pants from behind you. "You take me so well. Like you were made for me. Like we were made for each other."

Your heart seizes at that, and all words get stuck in your throat when Jungkook picks up the pace of his thrusts, both hands going to your chest to cup your breasts.

Jungkook presses his chest to your back, practically molding himself around your body, you're starting to feel as one. He buries his face in the crook of your neck, lips on your sweaty skin.

"I might not last long," he grunts.

"Me too," you mewl. It stays silent for a while, just both your breaths filling the room. It's not like you need to say anything, to be vocal like you both usually are. It's different this time and you know Jungkook can feel it too. With the way his body is pressed to yours, to his tight hold on you like you might disappear into thin air if he lets go, how his mouth never seems to leave your skin, how your hand holds his. Like you're too overwhelmed with the events that happened today, the past few weeks—since this started. That it's all coming to an end, but an end with a new beautiful beginning. It feels overwhelming because you're entering new territory. You still have your doubts (you don't think those will ever leave), but at least now you're on the same page with Jungkook. Together. Jumping into the unknown. Even if you're not sure how this will turn out—being together with him, for real this time. If it'll end in greater heartbreak or will be your best decision yet. But you're here because you want to try. You've let him in because you want to try. Because your heart has been with his from the start, you realize.

You're brought back to reality when Jungkook brings his hand up to wrap around your throat—not tightly, a hold barely there but firm enough to know he has you in his hold. You stare at yourself again in the mirror, at Jungkook moving his hips from behind you. How you're so pressed into each other.

"Jungkook," you choke out, suddenly so overwhelmed and full of emotion. His gaze shifts from your body to your face, looking at you through the mirror so intently you feel like melting. You move your hips back to meet his thrusts, your body feeling like it's on fire and that you might snap soon. "Kook, I—"

"I know, baby," he murmured. "I know." Knows that you're close, that this moment feels different, electrifying. "I got you, okay?" he whispers so sweetly. You lean your head back against his shoulder. "Let go for me. Hm?"

"Okay," you whisper, eyes closing and focusing on doing just that. It doesn't take you much longer to reach your peak, to let go and let the pleasure take control of your body. It comes to you gradually, getting stronger and stronger, and Jungkook talks you through it all. Though you can't make out his words since everything sounds so muffled. Like you're under water and the wave's crashed.

"Gonna come too," he grunts. "You're so beautiful when you come, baby. I can't—"

Jungkook reaches his orgasm after and fills up the condom. Fucks you so slow and deep through his high it sets you off once more. Don't realize that his finger is rubbing your clit slowly. Like he wanted you to reach your high again.

"That's it," he whispers. "So good for me."

You almost fall face first on your bed, but Jungkook catches you with a hand around your waist. Moves you around the bed so that you're laying on your back with him right beside you. You curl into him instantly as his arm wraps around your shoulder. He brings his lips to the crown of your head and places a gentle kiss.

You close your eyes and listen to the beat of his heart slowing down, focusing on the rise and fall of his chest. "We need to clean up soon," you mumble after a while.

"I'll do it," he mumbles back. "Let me just— Let me catch my breath first."

You laugh lightly, your body slowly succumbing to sleep. You feel Jungkook stand up and for a second your heart seizes in your chest. You keep your eyes closed while you try to listen for any sounds of clothes being picked up, of him getting dressed.

All you hear is your bathroom door being open then closed, then you feel a damp washcloth between your legs, and only then does your heart start beating again. Jungkook's back beside you in bed a few moments later, and then you finally succumb to sleep.

..••°°°°••..°°••....••°°..••°°°°••..

An alarm wakes you up the next morning. You know it isn't yours since it's not the usual ringtone you use. You open your eyes slowly and smile sleepily at Jungkook's arm draped across your waist. You look back to see him sleeping peacefully, mouth slightly ajar. You reach your arm out to your beside table to look for the noisy phone, realizing it's Jungkook's when you bring it close to your face to turn off the alarm.

You notice he's gotten a few notifications since last night, are about to place it back on your table when a text stands out to you. Waking you up fully. Your tummy churning, your breath seizing.

You can't see the preview of the message, but the name is enough to leave you feeling dizzy.

It's from Iseul. You know her because she's one of Jungkook's regulars. And you know this because she texts him a lot, her name always popping up in his phone. Not that you secretly went through it before, but sometimes Jungkook likes showing his phone to you and your friends, either of a cool photo he took lately or some random meme.

You try to stop your thoughts from thinking of the worst, but you can't help it. You and Jungkook haven't talked much about your relationship, because there is a lot to talk about. You know it won't all be fixed in one sitting. So you don't know if they're still seeing each other. You don't know if he meant what he said last night.

You start feeling ill, your palms sweating and your head beginning to pound. You find yourself standing up, getting dressed and grabbing just your phone with you. Never mind the fact that you're leaving Jungkook yet you're in your place. That he might still be here when you're back, whenever that will be. For the first time since you started this thing with him, you leave without saying goodbye.

#jungkook fic #jungkook fanfic #jeon jungkook #jungkook one shot #fwb!jk #fwb!jungkook #fwb jungkook #mine #college jungkook #bts fic #bts fanfic #fic ooyg

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kamisama1kiss · 3 months

Note

The ninja reaction to an intense fight between them and their lover??? 😭🙏

The angst is crazy, I will do it since I love my silly lego men and Nya (girl power). PLEASE, I felt as if I kept repeating myself doing this 😔 sorry guys

~~~

{ Ninjago Headcanons } Thier reaction to an intense argument

~Lloyd Garmadon~

His first instinct was to jump into trying to calm the situation, even if he was the who snapped into the argument or not. Even if he is more on the calm side, he could lose his temper if everything continues to go left.

It wouldn't last long, but when it does happens he tries to keep collected but usually ends up walking away if it gets too much for him. (Dont worry, he is only gone for top, maybe 20 minutes)

~Kai Smith

Simply would be shocked in the start, immediately jumps in to trying to find the problem, but some of his anger could get the best of him. There is never a time when he wants to argue, but he just can't handle such conflicts if he happens to already, but more on the moody side of the time being.

He would never raise his voice. Maybe upset, yes? Feeling hurt, maybe? Depends on why you're arguing. But raising his voice or turning physical is something that would NEVER happen.

~Cole Brookstone~

Flinched at first, confused at why you'd be upset, not understand what could have caused it. Taking a deep breath while talking in a gental tone, wishing to not make you further upset. His lover is a main priority in life, which meant he would be very patient.

Even if he didn't agree, he would let you speak out everything to then come with pointers to tell his side.

~Zane Julian~

Lord, someone save him. He does understand responsibility and could tell simply that by your nature, you've been more on edge. When his lover finally spoke up about it all, it came out more aggressive them he could imagine. Simply, he would try to soothe you to calm down.

Talking a more rational approach, giving you a drink and a seat. Even though he was upset, he'd prefer to sort it out and then lash back out.

~Jay Walker~

Not even for a moment did he consider it was him at fault, would argue back without even it register it in his mind. Eventually, having you left only made him pout as when he thought about it for himself, only to actually finally notice how dumb he was being about his reaction.

Would try to find you with a small little gift to hopefully make you happy before talking it out.

~Nya Smith~

She had the same tempor as her brother but more calmer, yet she could get a bit snappy. But as her lover, her first instinct was to find the problem and fix it. She'd definitely had a frown trying to pry its way up as arguing was never her cup of tea, it was definitely hidden though.

No matter what the situation, she wouldn't dare to leave until everything was talked about and figured out.

~~~

I AM BACK!! I am starting to feel better to write again as writers block decided to slowly wither away finally. Hope you enjoy!!♡

#headcanons #lego ninjago #ninjago #lloyd garmadon x reader #kai smith x reader #cole brookstone x reader #jay walker x reader #nya smith x reader #zane julien x reader #ninjago headcanons #ninjago lloyd garmadon #ninjago kai smith #ninjago nya smith #ninjago zane julien #ninjago cole brookstone #ninjago jay walker

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theyhavetakenovermylife · 9 months

Note

AHH HII I DONT KNOW IF YOURE TAKING REQUESTS BUT YOUR 2007 FICS ARE SO 💋😩🤌

i would LOOOOOVVEEEE to see how everything went down when leo actually came back.. would they tell him? would raph continue to do it? would she choose one over the other? AHHH SO MANY POSSIBILITIES if you’re not taking requests ignore this but i would beg you for some closure or just more spicy fics HAHAH🤭

Anger: part 2 (18+) (Angst)

2007!Raphael x reader (a little 2007!Leonardo x reader)

Part 1 / Part 3 Leonardo's Ending Raphael’s Ending

-----------------------

A/N: Thank you for your request! I’ve been so tempted to continue it, but I wasn’t quite sure how, as I can only see this situation end in a specific way. I decided to go in a third direction, bc let’s face it, everybody has made their own bed in this lol. And bc it is the 2007 TMNT, I’ve allowed myself to go extra angst. Hope you enjoy!💙❤️

------------------------

You and Raphael’s sexual relationship has taken a turn in the serious direction, but then an old missed face comes home, stirring up feelings once again, especially anger.

Warning: Sex as a coping mechanism, angry sex, angst, emotional betrayal, swearing, Leo and Raph being horrible brothers to each other, cheating?

------------------------

It had been almost a year. A year had passed since Leonardo’s training had ended, yet there was no sight of him. You clearly remembered the night you sat in your window, with a slight hope that Leo would come home. It almost felt wrong to think in such a way, especially after a year of sneaking around with his own brother. You had found Raphael’s pressens comforting, even if most of the time was spent moaning or calling out his name in ecstasy, with your legs spread wide or over his shoulder.

You really liked the time you had spent with Raph, even if he wasn’t much up for talking about emotions. He was there for you, in a way Leo hadn’t been able to in a long time. Yet, when you saw a familiar figure out on your fire escape, during the last hour of Leo’s return day, you were slightly disappointed to see Raphael instead. He too didn’t seem too happy. And that was the moment you realized that Leo most likely wouldn’t come home again.

That night with Raphael was way more passionate than what you had been used to with him. Passionate with an undertone of sadness, but intense. There had been very little dirty talk from Raph, yet his eyes spoke with more emotion than they ever did before. Same with his hips, as they thrusted into you with more focus and intention, instead of his usual rapid angry way.

Raphael stayed that night, like he had done so often up until that point. And as you woke up the next day, and began your obligatory morning sex, a change in your and Raph’s relationship was noted. Though still rough, it was not as hard as usual. Though there was still anger hidden in there somewhere, it was not as prominent as before. Sex between you and Raph was no longer a coping mechanism. It was no longer about the absence of Leo, but just about you and Raphael.

Sex in Leo’s room grew old long ago. After Raph had had you in every possible way on every surface of his older brother's room, it started to move into his own room. The first time he had you on his own bed, he felt like he had won a major victory in a long fought battle. It satisfied him to have your scent spread all over his room, in such a way that Leo had never managed to in his own room. With your legs over his shoulders, his hips pounding into you over and over again, and your hands holding on to him for dear life, he felt like the king of the world. How you would hold onto his head while his tongue was writing his name over your dripping cunt, or the way your mouth felt around his dick and how you worked to make him feel good. It was enough to make any man go mad. And that was almost what Raph did, whenever he sat around, waiting for the perfect moment to jump on you again without, the rest of his family noticing.

When Raph would come back home, after a night of crime fighting as the Nightwatcher, finding you sleeping in his bed. Waiting for him to come back home to you. Waiting for him to hold you tight before giving you yet another earth shattering night to remember. And unlike his brother, Raphael did just that. He came home to you to take care of you, just like Leo never would. Or so he thought.

Leo had to admit that he was slightly fearful as he stepped into the sewers. Even after what April had told him, he still feared the reactions that would come from his family. Would they be angry or would they be happy? He did not know. But the reaction he feared the most was yours. Leo first thought when he came to New York was to go to your place, just to see you again. But remembering how late it was, and not knowing what plans you had the next day, he opted to make his way straight to the sewers.

The first thing that met Leo as he stepped into his old family home, was the sound of his two youngest brother’s snoring. Both Donnie and Mikey sprawled out in front of the TV, pizza boxes laying all around them. Leo smiled at the sight, remembering what April had told him. They had jobs now, however that was possible for two mutant turtles. But because of that they probably needed their sleep, and therefore Leo decided it was best to leave them alone for now.

When Leo first stepped into his room, he was surprised by the smell that met him. The scent of you was very strong, almost jumping at him. Had you been touching yourself in his room? It touched Leo deep. A pang of guilt pinching his heart. But there was another smell. A familiar one, yet he could not place it. It did not seem to fit into his room, and definitely not with the smell of you.

After having placed his things in his room, Leo went down to the dojo. He had a feeling that Master Splinter was up and waiting for him there. So when Leo found his father sitting in the dojo patiently waiting for him, he sat down.

Raphael knew as soon as he walked out of his bedroom. He stopped in his tracks, feeling all sorts of emotions. Happiness, pleasantly surprised, confused, unsure, angry. Leo was home. His big brother was home. The man that had you first was home.

He went to the dojo and peeked through the open doors. The sight of his brother talking to Master Splinter was like a punch to the guts. They were talking like they did any other day, as if Leo hadn’t been gone for two years. Raph did not hear a single word they said. All he could think about was you, and how you would react when you knew Leonardo was back home.

Master Splinter said something, which prompted Leo to turn and look in Raph’s direction. The red clad turtle panicked a bit, not sure what to say. He ended up settling with a simple welcome home and that he was going to bed, before turning and waking up his brothers.

But Raphael did not go to bed. While Master Splinter and his brothers were distracted by Leonardo’s return, Raphael went straight to the apartment he had found himself in more and more often over the past year.

You were sleeping peacefully when Raph came to your bedroom window. If it had been any other night, Raph would have climbed in quietly through your unlocked window, before spooning you in your sleep, waiting for you to wake up. But not that night. Raph had thrown all his quiet skills as a ninja out the door, as he banged your window closed behind him, causing you to stir in your sleep, slowly waking up.

“Raph?”, you asked, rubbing your eyes as the named turtle started taking off his gear, in a way he hadn’t done for a long time.

Raph didn’t answer, but instead he slammed his lips to yours. You moaned out in pleasant confusion as your tongues danced together in your mouth. It had been a long time ago since Raph had been this rough with you, and you could not help but wonder what had caused it. But as he started pulling your underwear off, feeling how wet you already were against his fingers, you couldn’t help but moan in pleasure, enjoying this side of Raph you hadn’t seen in a while.

The sex that night was rough. Not unpleasant, but hard. It was like being fucked like the same way Raph used to do it one and a half years ago. Expect he didn’t talk dirty to you like he used to back then. This time he growled more than before, and would bark out small sentences, such as “take it”, “look at me” and “say my name”. It wasn’t that you didn’t enjoy it, because you did. You had nothing against rough sex, and especially not the way Raph did it, but you still couldn’t shake the feeling that something had pushed him. The gripe of his hand around your neck as he fucked you sensless, made you think that he wanted people to notice someone had held you down like this. Like he wanted to prove something.

Raph was angry as he slapped your ass during doggy style, bringing his hands down hard against your flesh, one after the other, before grabbing onto your hips and thrusting into you like a drill. But he was not angry at you, but Leo. After all this time, how dared he come home now? After you and him finally were doing a little more than just fucking, he had to come and fuck it up. He just had to come and take you away from him one more time. But Raphael wouldn’t let that happen, especially not now while you were calling out his name, begging him to make you cum, just like you had done so many times before.

After three rounds, you thought that Raph would what had almost become a habit to him. To stay the rest of the night, and leave in the early hours of the morning, before his family would notice he had been gone. But to your surprise, Raph was already putting his gear back on, just as quickly as he had been taking them off.

“Raph?”, you asked, watching him in confusion. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing”, he said, tying the knot on his belt. “Absolutely nothing”.

“But that’s not true, is it?”, you asked, getting out of your bed, while he acted like he didn’t hear you. “Somethings going on, isn’t there?”

Raph growled quietly in response, irritated that you could feel his anger. He tried to relax his fists as he turned to you, fighting to keep his expression neutral. “Nothing is going on, (Y/N)”.

But you didn’t buy it. You frowned your eyes, blinking at him a few times, and Raph knew he had no way out of this one.

“You know what? Forget it. It’s not something to bother you with”, he said, trying to sound as sincere as possible, before turning to leave out the window. You called after him as he climbed up the fire escape. You quickly put on a pair of pants before hurrying up after him, your bare feet against the cold metal of the fire espace. He might have been a ninja, but you wouldn’t let him leave so easily. First Leo and now Raph. You couldn’t let it happen again.

You caught up with Raphael on the roof, grabbing onto his arm before he could leave. He looked at your hand on his bicep, almost as if it was hurting. But he did not pull back. Instead he sighed as you continued to ask him.

“Please tell me what is going on, Raph”, you almost begged him, shivering in the cold wind of the New York night. “You can’t just leave like that, not like…” You didn’t get to finish that sentence, before another presence jumped onto the roof. A breath hitched in your throat as you recognized the shape of his face, shell and the katanas strapped onto his back.

Raph’s eyes fell to the ground as he took a long breath in. Of course he had to be here now.

“... Leo?”

Your expression and the way you said his name was almost enough to bring Leo to his knees. Surprise, hurt, sad, confused. You stared at him, wondering if you were dreaming, almost scared to reach out to him. Leo could only imagine how confused you must be at that moment. It hurt him, and it hurt him even more to know that he was the reason you felt like that.

“Hey, (Y/N)”.

Raphael bit the inside of his cheek, watching as you let go of his arm and walked to Leo. He had known this would happen. It was like watching the two of you a few years ago. I love with those eyes you and Raph was slowly building up over the days. He almost had what you and Leo had, just so much better. But then Leo had to come and ruin it. Not only did he come back and take you from him, but he just came back like that, leaving Raph feeling even more betrayed by his brother.

Leo opened his arms a little, ready to hug you like he had done so many times before. To comfort you in the way he should have done once his training had finished. Raph looked away, feeling the lump in his throat build up when...

SMACK.

Raph looked up at the sound, staring at the scene in front of him. Leo almost forgot to breathe. Eyes staring off into the distance, his cheek burning with a tingling yet painful sensation. You had just slapped him. Leo looked confused at you, only to be met by your angry expression and your teared up eyes. You wanted to slap him again, feeling all the anger from the unknown that had been building up over the past two years, finally boiling over. But you didn’t. Instead you started yelling, louder than Leo had ever heard you yell before.

“A whole year, Leonardo! A whole fucking year! Half a year without writing, and then you don’t show, and another year later you expect a hug!?”

“I’m- I’m sorry, (Y/N). They needed me, I- I had to”, Leo stammered, not sure what to tell you.

Raph was surprised. He had never heard Leo stammer and never in front of you. The fearless leader never stammered, not even when he was cold. But a slap to the face by you was what did it.

“And you never thought that I needed you?! Leo, I fucking waited for you everday, even after you stopped writing!”

“Like I said, (Y/N); I’m sorry! They- they needed me in the jungle! They were killing people! Innocent people! I- I had to stay there, I couldn’t just let people get killed!”

“And you couldn’t tell me that at least once during a year and a half? Leo, I thought you were dead when you didn’t come home!”

Leo didn’t answer that. Instead his eyes fell to the ground as he felt guilt eat him from the shell up. Why didn’t he write? He wasn’t sure. He did have the time. Was it because he at one point feared that everyday could be his last, or was it because he for a short time felt he did better saving people in the jungle, than he ever did as a leader for his brothers? He did not know. He had totally forgotten about you and how you must have been feeling while he was gone. Leonardo had fucked up big time, thinking he was saving people, all while leaving the girl he used to call his girlfriend alone in the unknown.

“And you!”, you yelled, turning to Raphael, pointing your finger straight at his face. “This is why you were so angry, wasn’t it?! And yet you didn’t tell me?! How long has Leo been home Raphael?! Huh?!”

Raph snatched your finger in the air, his blood boiling with anger. He just had to say it. Especially in front of Leo, now that you had been yelling at him like that. He just had to stump it further into the wound, even if it meant evoking your anger even further.

“As I recall you didn’t seem to mind me doing you angry while Leo was gone”.

Leo snapped his attention straight at Raphael with that comment. Then he realized. That smell in his room. It was Raphael. It was his own brother. His scent mixed with yours all over his room. On every fucking surface. The realization hit him even harder than any of your words had. He couldn’t believe it. He refused to believe it.

“You didn’t”, was all Leo could choke out, feeling his hands shaking.

Raph cured himself and his own anger. He cared for his brother, but his brother never cared for him. Raph’s hurt and insecurities grew stronger than any rational decision he could make up.

“Every night and every day”, Raph said, letting go of you before turning his attention towards his older brother. “Hard and good”. You saw as Leo’s chest moved up and down as his breathing sped up, a fire burning in his eyes. You would be lying if you said it didn’t scare you. Because it did.

“You’re lying”, Leo growled.

“Why would I lie about that? For the same stupid reason you didn’t come home? Because guess what, while you were gone, being a hero in the forest, I took care of her better than you ever did”.

That was what broke Leo. In anger he drew his katanas, not even waiting for his brother to pull out his sai. Raph felt horrible for liking how angry he made Leo. As he dodged his brother's sharp blades, he pulled out his sais, ignoring how you yelled at them to cut it out. The battle that followed was intense, with you yelling at them to stop. But they didn’t. Not until Raph and Leo pinned against the roof.

It was there, staring down at his big brother’s hurt and angry eyes, Raph realized what he was doing. What he had done. Broken his trust with not just you, but his own flesh and blood. And now he was fighting his brother, ignoring the calling of the person he told himself he was doing it for. Just like Leo, he had fucked up. He had fucked up big time.

Raph didn’t know what to do. He was scared. Scared of his own actions against two people he cared for. Therefore he grabbed a hold of his sais and ran. For once he didn’t feel anger, but sadness. And Raph didn’t know what to do with sadness like this, except hiding.

Leo called out for his brother, telling him to call back. Not to fight. No, he knew just as well as Raph that he had fucked up. He had created a burning absence with no closure, and the two of you had found your own way to cope. He was naive to think you would still stick around after a year and a half without a single word.

Anger burns bright and hot, and kept unchecked it will bring down everything around it. And now you, Raph and Leo were all feeling the effects of that burning anger.

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rassvetsky · 2 years

Note

i was wondering if u can come up with ‘a trust issue who needs reassurance all the time’ reader and ‘i dont know how to communicate my feelings’ bucky. basically a miscommunication trope.

i will accept however storyline and ending you make because i love you and i love ur writing💕❤️❤️

hi babe!! i really really hope i did your wonderful request at least some justice because i got too carried away-- i hope you like it! thank you for existing ♡

Out Of Mind

bucky barnes x reader

"Falling in love with you terrified Bucky, enough to push you away. He was sure that it's better this way. But merely a week later, when you disappear without a trace, Bucky realized that he couldn't handle being without you."

[5.2k] | angst with a happy ending, miscommunication, arguing, bucky being an asshole at first but he has his reasons, natasha being protective, sassy tony, canon level violence, fighting, reader getting minor injuries, clint is the loml, bucky is an idiot in love my dudes, they're so cute god help me

reblog and/or like for a kiss, feedback much appreciated! not proofread.

Bucky used to be a simple man, Steve had told you long ago. After all those years of torture, he developed… Complexity.

And you couldn't agree more.

He was a tender lover to begin with, the one to always make sure that you were alright, the one to put your wellbeing above his. He wasn't good with words- wasn't the most expressive man out there, but you understood him. You understood why he never included cards in the flowers he sent to you, or sometimes didn't say anything back to your love declarations other than a bashful smile; you understood that for him, these things worked in different ways now.

And that's why he loved you so much. That's why he was terrified.

Because the deeper he fell for you, the more intense his feelings got. The harder his separation anxiety hit, the more mushed his brain became.

And in any other scenario, that would be lovely. Those butterflies that one would feel in their stomach, or the sweet little dumbification that came hand to hand with love. In another life, he'd bask in the feeling. He'd see the world around him under a different light, a light that you cast on his life.

But in this life? It was nothing but dangerous. Nothing but absolutely horrendous.

Because he was supposed to focus. He was supposed to be alert. His fight or flight response had to be on at all times and no matter what, he was supposed to prioritize his life to save the others.

He couldn't do that when you were involved, not anymore. The paranoia got too much- he was terrified of seeing you get hurt, of losing you in any way. That fear brought out the worst in him, causing fights to break out whenever you willingly got yourself in trouble, distracting him, making you drift apart further.

You didn't want that. He didn't want that. But life for you wasn't always just movie nights at the compound, breakfasts on bed, long nights of talking about the future.

He had to let the chips fall where they may.

You needed reassurance, he knew that. But suddenly, after the last mission you went on with the team including Bucky, he suddenly… Stopped doing that. That bashful grin was nowhere to be seen when you told him you loved him, when you held his hand it just didn't last as long as it usually did, he… He didn't even look at you properly. And that went on for days, each day worse than the one before, until he barely even talked to you.

And the dread you felt on your chest was unbearable.

The night-time fell quicker than any other day that one evening, as you prepared yourself a warm tea to accompany your book. Carrying the mug up to your shared room with Bucky, you slowly got under the sheets, holding the book open with one hand, mug with the other.

The plot was barely interesting to you with all the thoughts running through your mind, snatching your attention from the words, making you have to go back and reread the same paragraphs over and over. It wasn't anything new, this type of distraction, but more often than not, it was the aftermath of the latest mission plaguing your mind. Not your boyfriend being excessively restrained towards you, as if your sole existence was a problem for him.

Speaking of, maybe it was. Maybe you were too high-maintenance for him, maybe you weren't giving him enough space, maybe he was just going through something. Or maybe, he was done with you. He didn't need you anymore, now that he got rid of the vivid nightmares and dissociations-

How cruel of you to think that. How cruel of him to leave that open as a possibility.

With your tea half-drank, you set the mug back on the nightstand, pinning the bookmark between the pages before leaving it by the mug. You didn't feel like laying down- didn't think you could fall asleep with your mind on overdrive like this anyway. Getting up from where you were laid across, you slowly made your way over to the window, arms crossed on your chest as you heaved a sigh. The view was nice, moonlight illuminated enough of the surrounding trees, and if you were to squint, you could see the grass shine wetly, with a layer of dew upon them.

You couldn't help the way your shoulders tensed a bit when the door knob twisted open, hearing the heavy steps of your lover and a sigh leaving his lips. Your back was facing him still, and you didn't dare to look at him, figuring he was busy changing his clothes judging by the shuffling sound of fabric.

The slight squeak of the mattress brought a bitter grin to your lips as you spoke up. "Not even gonna talk to me?"

He was quiet for a full minute. "Sorry. I'm tired, sweetheart."

"Of me?"

"What?" he sounded surprised. "Wha- why would I be tired of you?"

"I don't know." you sighed. "You've been acting incredibly distant for the past week. Figured I was tiring you out."

Another squeak, he was on his feet now. Slowly walking towards you, he rested a hand on the small of your back, but you still didn't look at him. You wouldn't admit that to yourself but you really didn't want to know the truth.

"Don't be ridiculous," he spoke, tone quiet. "It's just that… The missions, you know how they-"

"We went through rougher missions back then," you chuckled. "On the verge of death, covered in blood. Missions that went on for months. You didn't treat me like this then."

"How am I treating you?"

"Like I'm a fucking nuisance!" you finally snapped, pushing his hand away from your body before turning towards him. Your eyes were wide with anger, chest heaving. "You're treating me like you don't even want to see me!"

"You're my girlfriend!" he was bewildered, albeit a bit guilty. "Of course I want to see you, what the fuck are you even talking about?!"

A scoff left your lips. "Fuck that! You used to treat me better when we were barely friends," you watched him look away, annoyed. "I've been trying to give you some space but you- you just won't tell me shit! You're barely talking to me, anyway! How the hell am I supposed to know what I did wrong if you won't even talk to me, Bucky?!"

Bucky felt his heart getting heavier. "Stop assuming that you did something wrong-"

"Then what else?! What else can I assume? For fuck's sake, am I supposed to assume that there's someone else, or you're just- you're just sick of me. That you don't need me anymore, is that what I'm supposed to think?" you could feel the tears building up by your waterline. "Fucking hell, it'd hurt way less if I was sure that it's all my fault! Or- even if you were- I just- just tell me what the fuck is wrong with you, please?"

"Nothing!" he was loud, suddenly. The sudden outburst had you taking a step back in instinct, and he panicked so hard for a moment that he almost took a step towards you.

He knew he shouldn't.

"Nothing, okay? Just one of those weeks. Leave it alone."

"Fine." you sighed. "Fine, I'll leave it alone. I'll leave you alone, Bucky, to figure your shit out and- please, for the love of God, don't talk to me until you do. I'm done being treated like garbage." and with a final shove to his chest, you walked out of the door.

Bucky knew that he deserved that.

Hell, he deserved a solid punch for the way he was treating you but he didn't know how else to act. He didn't know what else to do. He was so sick of worrying, being in a constant state of paranoia because of you, so sick of his heart hurting like someone reached right into his chest and severed it off whenever you got hurt.

Was he protecting himself, or you?

"Hey," Sam swiftly sat by Bucky's side with a bowl of cereal on his palms, not giving the other a chance to walk away before speaking up again. "You good? You look like… Hell, I can't sugarcoat this. You look like absolute shit."

Bucky felt like absolute shit.

"I'm fine." he muttered, eyes trained on the big TV screen in front of them. The compound had been pretty quiet for the past few weeks, with the main troublemakers scattered around the globe for a mission.

Sam saw right through his bullshit, though. "Your girl ain't talking to you?"

"None of your business."

"She looks like absolute shit too."

Bucky took a moment to process that.

"Did you guys fight?"

"Again, none of your business, Sam." heaving a sigh, Bucky slowly pushed himself up to his feet, leaving Sam sitting on the couch all alone. Natasha, who was busy making herself something to eat to get through lunch, decided to chime in after Bucky managed to take a few steps away.

"You push her away the second things get hard and then wonder why she hates you."

If looks could kill, Bucky's would murder everyone in that room under three seconds. "She doesn't hate me."

"You want her to hate you."

"Bullshit."

"Because you hate yourself. Isn't that it?"

Sam's eyes were wide when he looked at Natasha. She was the one to deliver a hard kick on the shin when one needed it, tough-loving and relentless with her words- not to hurt the other, but to give them a chance to see things from a different perspective.

When Bucky didn't say anything, Natasha decided to continue. "I don't know how you're justifying this in that 'cyborg' brain but you don't have one single right to punish her. For absolutely no reason, too."

"Natasha-"

"Shut it, Sam." she shook her head. "We get it, you don't like fights. But I never took you for a coward, James, and you're not being anything else but that with the way you're refusing to fight for her."

Nobody said anything else for a solid minute, while Natasha kept glaring at Bucky. His eyes were on the ground now, the harsh nature of Natasha's words hitting him right across the chest- and it hurt. It hurt bad, because he knew that he was hurting you on purpose. "How do I make it right?"

"In my opinion? Leave her the fuck alone-"

"No, no. Natasha, calm your horses," Sam got up from where he was seated, approaching the two with a relaxed expression to calm them both down. "Just tell her how you feel, man. Be real with her. Be completely honest- if you don't love her anymore, just say so. If that's not the case, then-"

"I love her, Sam."

A soft sigh left Sam's lips. "I know. Just talk to her. She'll understand."

Bucky shook his head in a nod. The idea of talking to you was nerve-wracking, to say the least. You hadn't talked to him in a week, despite living in the same compound. Didn't even dare to step into your shared room when he was there, instead deciding to take on a vacant room for a while and get your work done in silence.

You were afraid of continuing that argument, honestly. Because you and Bucky- you two weren't the type to argue. Problems would be solved in peace at all times, with both parties admitting to their faults. So when that dynamic changed, it freaked you out. Just like how falling in love with you freaked out Bucky.

"FRIDAY," Bucky called out. "Where's Y/N?"

An automated voice answered immediately. "I'm afraid that information is classified." Bucky tensed up quicker than he'd like to admit.

"What?" Sam muttered under his breath, gaze finding Natasha's confused one. Natasha spoke up not too long afterwards. "What do you mean by classified?"

"Mr. Stark specifically requested that I keep Mrs. Y/L/N's current location confidential."

"Fucking hell," Bucky heaved a sigh. "Have any of you seen her today?"

"Nah," with a shrug, Sam walked towards the counter to set down his bowl of cereal, suddenly not interested in the food but rather, your whereabouts. "Last I saw her… Yesterday evening, yeah. She was leaving Tony's office, didn't say anything."

"Where did she go after that?"

"Man, how would I know? I'm not keepin' tabs on your girlfriend, that's your job."

"FRIDAY, where's Tony?" Natasha ignored the two, focusing on the matter at hand. For all she knew, you weren't the one to keep secrets from the team. Even on solo missions, you would always keep your tracker on just in case.

"In his office. Shall I inform Mr. Stark of your visit?"

"Nope." lips pressed into a thin line, and a not-so-apologetic shrug. Typical Tony Stark nature. "Just because you live here doesn't mean you have to know everything."

"But she's my girlfriend."

"Just because she made that mistake doesn't mean you have to know everything, Barnes." Tony quipped. "If anyone else in this room was on her position and I were to give away your location, which she specifically made sure that I wouldn't tell, I would be murdered horrendously."

"It's not like her to do that." Natasha's tone was way softer than Bucky's, understandably. She was mad at Bucky and worried about you at the same time but still, keeping her cool was an art form and she was doing it beautifully. "We're just worried, that's all."

"You don't seem like her parents to me."

"Would you tell us if we were her parents?"

"Wilson, use your head. Of course I wouldn't." plopping down on his seat with a huff, Tony rolled his eyes. "I'm sure you'd beg to differ but I'm a very virtuous and excruciatingly handsome man, and I made a promise, so… The door is right behind you. I got a lot of stuff to do."

The sound of Bucky's palm meeting the desk separating him from Tony caused everyone's eyes to find his, including Tony. "You have to give me something."

"I don't owe you anything." Tony's words were like venom as they dripped from his tongue, his challenging gaze on Bucky's rampageous one. "But if you really, really want her to hate all of you, fine. She's on a solo mission."

"A solo mission?! You sent her on a solo mission?!" Sam was quick to grab Bucky by the arm, pulling him back a little.

"Man, calm down-"

"Last time I checked, she was perfectly capable of handling a mission and taking care of herself." Tony spoke, calm despite the furious man standing in front of him. "She wanted to go. Why the hell would I say no?"

"Bucky, he's right." Natasha pushed herself up from the wall she was leaning on. Signaling for Sam to possibly take Bucky out of the office with her eyes, she approached the desk. "I'm sure she's fine and she only did that just so you wouldn't go after her."

"Yeah," Sam continued. "Let's just- let's get you out of here. She'll be back before you know it."

Tony didn't miss the glare Bucky sent his way when he left the office with Sam.

Feeling Natasha's judgmental eyes on him, he looked up at her, leaning back on his seat comfortably. "Do you need anything?"

"What are you hiding?"

"Nothing, except for her location."

"No," Natasha shook her head. "It's obvious you didn't tell us everything. I'm not expecting you to, but I've known you for a long time, Tony. I can see it when you're leaving a crucial part out."

A sigh left Tony's lips.

"She's indeed on a solo mission. A mission that I know absolutely nothing about, and she disabled her own tracker."

"Are you sure nobody knows you're here?"

"God, Clint, what's with all the secrecy?" you weren't even sure your hushed whisper was heard by Clint, crowded streets of Hong Kong were noisy enough to usher a headache within you. You hadn't seen him in a while, with him retiring again, and God he retired a lot, but after receiving a message with 'emergency, don't tell anybody.' and coordinates, you rushed to his aid rather immediately.

You owed him a lot.

Following him to a small apartment building as he pushed the door open, you looked behind to see if anybody was following, before climbing up the stairs with him. "What's going on?"

"Extraction." he whispered. "Kind of a sensitive one. Tony didn't want anyone involved."

"I really think Laura should lock you up sometimes."

"So do I, kid."

Your time spent in his small hideout apartment was filled with intel and planning. It was supposed to be a very quiet mission, a sensitive one like he mentioned earlier- a swift infiltration to save a former SHIELD agent from where he was held prisoner, just so he could return to his research.

You didn't quite understand why Tony wouldn't want anyone to be involved and to save the agent, but you weren't going to ask. You trusted Clint, sometimes more than you did Tony, and if Clint told you that what he's doing was right, then you'd believe him.

The next day, with both of you suited up, his arrows ready and your secret knives hidden beneath layers of fabric all around your body; the quiet approach to the building went pretty smoothly. He kept telling you to keep your cool and to keep it quiet. This was a stealth op, and made sure to assure you that you were excellent at those.

Except, for all the stealth operations, your partner was Bucky. He was the one who knew exactly what you were going to do without needing you to tell him, he was the one who fought by your side, in so much sync with you that it felt like you two were one mind split to two bodies. You felt safer when he was by your side, calm enough to perform better.

You didn't tell Clint that. You didn't tell him that you felt way too insecure without Bucky by your side to perform well.

He was expecting your help, and you were going to deliver.

Except, things took a turn for the worse far too quickly. You got into the room in which the agent was kept, with Clint following from far behind to keep you safe; and saved the agent from his restraints. Before you could lead him out, though, you heard Clint telling you to stop taking your time because apparently, a swarm of people were coming your way, and he had to hide.

You helped the agent all the way down to the ground from the first floor, through the piping by the outer side of the wall and informed Clint of your current location, before spotting a few men running your way.

Pushing the agent away towards the woods where he could hide and protect himself, you pulled your gun out and managed to down at least two of the five men. You noticed one of them following the agent as the two attacked you; landing a harsh kick by one's neck before sliding out your knife and swinging it at the other's direction, but the distraction that they needed came quickly when through your in-ear, you heard Clint's voice again.

"Shit, abort. Get the hell out of there, get away from the building."

And a loud explosion right to your left followed.

Natasha was torn.

Tony's words kept replaying themselves on her head as she paced around the room, unable to decide between telling Bucky and keeping it to herself. She didn't know what she would be risking if she told him, but at the same time, you could get yourself in a much bigger situation and a supporting pair of eyes at solo missions were always required.

She couldn't bear the worry and uncertainty anymore.

Pushing the back door that led to the living room open with a loud thud, she found Bucky by the kitchen area, and Sam by the couch, watching the afternoon news. "I need to tell you guys something."

Bucky perked up at that, pulling himself away from his moping state to get back up on his feet, and walk towards the couch where Natasha approached. "She disabled her own tracker. Tony has no idea where she is, or what she's doing."

"Shit, how are we supposed to find her, then?" Sam slowly got up from where he was seated in worry. But before any of them could say anything else, a loud explosion sound snatched their attention and brought it to the screen.

"Earlier this morning, a lab explosion took place in a Hong Kong biochemistry lab, for reasons unknown. Public CCTV footage shows two unidentified individuals breaking into the building only ten minutes before the blast."

"Isn't that-"

"Damn it," Natasha whispered. "God fucking damn it, Barton."

No matter how fast the Quinjet was, Bucky felt like they couldn't get there quick enough. His heart was basically beating through his ribs, brain pumping adrenaline into every single bit of his veins as he watched the jet decrease altitude. The news didn't even provide the number of casualties, and the fact that he wasn't sure if you made it out of there alive or not was eating him alive.

The fact that he didn't get to make things right with you beforehand was outright torture.

The jet landed on a clearing by the woods, pretty close to the remote building in which the explosion took place. Bucky's strut seemed like it was made out of steel, as if nothing in this world could even attempt to stop him as he walked in front, Natasha and Sam following close behind. It had been at least twenty hours since the blast, and if you were dead, you'd be identified, right?

The news of your passing would be all over the world by now, right?

"I know where they might be hiding," Natasha spoke up, a bit breathless from having to catch up with Bucky's fast steps. "Clint has a hideout apartment, not too far from here."

"Fuck!" your loud cry was enough to land a grimace on Clint's face, as he let out soft shushes, trying his best to wrap your injuries up.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." he mumbled, taping down the bandage wrapped around your thigh before giving it a slight pat. "Just a contusion. I know it hurts but you could have it much worse."

"I know, but it still hurts, you idiot!"

"And whose fault is that? Not mine!"

Letting your head fall back on the cushion with a thud, you let out a slight groan. "How's the agent?"

"Called somebody to pick him up," he sighed, pulling himself up from the floor to sit next to your laid out figure. "I genuinely didn't know that they had explosives laid out through the building. Some sort of eradication. Must've been big, whatever they were hiding."

"Couldn't really keep it quiet, huh?"

"Unfortunately," he chuckled. "But we saved him, at least. Probably going to get an earful from Tony when he finds out… But you did a good job. Thanks for coming."

"Didn't have anything better to do," a grin made its way to your lips. "Don't even wanna go back, if I'm being honest."

A frown took over his features. "Did something happen?" and he continued, when your only response was a slight nod. "Bucky?"

"That easy to guess, huh?"

"Nothing else has an impact on you," a soft chuckle followed. "It'll be fine. You two- you shouldn't lose each other. Not over anything."

"I don't know if I can make sure of that anymore, Clint."

"Look, I'm saying this from a man's point of view," he repositioned himself on where he was seated, now completely facing you. "And I don't ever want you to think that I'm sexist or something, but, um… We're different. In a bad way- we're not… Complicated like your kind."

"My kind? Okay, now that's-"

"No, shut up, you know what I mean," he laughed. "Every single woman that I had the pleasure of meeting knew what they wanted. Maybe it was a bit rough around the edges, maybe it was just a scaffolding but there was a plan. There was an… expectation of how things are supposed to go, you know?"

A short silence followed. "And because of that scaffolding, you folks don't freak out as much as we do. And when you do, you still make sense. We don't. We freak out over the smallest inconvenience and everything goes shit because we don't know how to restructure our own plans that quickly. We take longer to adapt. Because we're a bit more primitive, does that make sense?"

You smiled at him, earnestly. "That's… vague, but it makes perfect sense. Thanks."

His hand found yours then, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "Don't worry about it."

That night, Clint woke up to footsteps across the apartment. He was sleeping on the armchair by the side of the bedroom, making sure that you were safe on his bed since you had to take a pill or two to manage the pain and fall asleep quicker.

Quickly getting up to his feet, he grabbed the pistol he placed on your nightstand earlier, slowly pulling the door open- only to find Natasha, with a gun in her hand, seemingly relieved to see Clint.

Clint brought his finger up to his lips, signaling the room as to let her know that you were asleep. "What are you doing here?" he whispered.

"That was a sloppy op, don't you think?" Natasha whispered back, teasing. "Gotta warn you, Barnes will be here in a couple of minutes and he's going to be mad, Clint."

"Let him be," he sighed. "She's-"

Before he could finish his sentence, the front door got pushed open, revealing a worried and seething Bucky and an apologetic Sam following suit, shutting the door slowly after the other. "Where is she?"

"She's in the bedroom-" Clint stepped in front of the door, shutting and guarding it. "She's exhausted. Be quiet."

"Why the fuck is she with you?"

"Hey, not like I kidnapped her, alright?" Clint rolled his eyes, still speaking as quietly as he could. "I needed her help and I couldn't call anybody else. I'm sorry I kept your girlfriend away from you for literally two days, Barnes."

Bucky took a step back, heaving a deep sigh. He was angry, angry at you, angry at Clint, angry at himself… Yet he didn't know where to direct that anger. He didn't know how to calm this feeling down. "Why didn't she tell anybody? Not even Tony- what the hell did you make her do that she felt like she needed to hide from everyone?"

A scoff left Natasha. "Bucky, stop making assumptions."

"No- you know what?" Bucky was getting louder by the second, and nobody in the room had the guts to shush him down. "My girl doesn't hide anything from me, ever. I need to know what was so important that she had to turn her tracker off and you had to lead her into a building full of explosives."

"How the hell was I supposed to know that the lab would explode?!"

"You were supposed to make sure that it's-"

"Bucky?" your frowning, sleepy figure appeared by the door that everyone was too busy watching the argument to notice opening. Bucky's gaze visibly softened when he saw you, tense shoulders relaxing before Clint stepped out of the way and with a few steps, he approached you to pull you into his embrace.

You didn't hug him back at first- instead sending a confused look to the rest, to which Sam shrugged as a response. "Are you okay?"

"No, are you okay?" he asked, pulling away to get a good look at your figure. A few cuts and the bandage by your thigh was visible as you were just wearing one of Clint's old shirts and underwear. "Are you okay?" he asked again, tone more stern this time.

"I'm fine," you pushed his hands off of you. "Why the fuck were you yelling at Clint?"

"Yeah, alright, have that conversation without us," Clint sighed, pushing the two of you into the bedroom gently before offering you a small wave and shutting the door, to give you some privacy.

Bucky sighed before looking at you again, wanting so bad to just cup your cheeks and leave kisses all over your face- but he knew he fucked up, and you were mad. "I was worried about you. You left without a word, and when I heard that your tracker was off-"

"I don't owe anyone any explanation." your tone was harsh. "And I'm sorry if I thought that you wouldn't give a shit, Bucky. You made it pretty obvious that you wanted me to leave you alone."

"I never said that," he ran his fingers through his hair, trying his best to stay calm and work this out- but you were almost as stubborn as him, if not more. "I never- I care about you, alright? You're my girlfriend, and you should've told me where you were going."

You shook your head to both sides in disbelief. "You're not entitled to that."

"Y/N-"

"No, you're seriously not entitled to knowing anything about me. Not when you have the audacity to treat me like I'm nothing more than an absolute stranger, and then to not even make an effort to talk to me for a whole week."

"I freaked out, alright?!" he sighed. "I was fucking terrified because- because of you!"

"How the hell is that my fault?!"

"It's your fault! You're the one who made me fall in love with you!" he was loud, and you got cryptically quiet.

He never dropped the L-word before.

"It's your fucking fault because I can't stop thinking about you, I can't stop worrying about you, I can't stop making everything about you and it's putting everyone in danger!" you were biting back a smile now, as he kept ranting. "Including you! I can't- do you have any idea how hard it is to look at you and not just burst into tears because oh my fucking God, you're the love of my life and-"

You cut him off with a kiss to his lips, your hands cupping his face. He was shocked at first, unable to comprehend the sudden switch from arguing to kissing, but he wasn't going to complain. Wrapping his arms around your body delicately, he deepened the kiss, exhaling softly against your mouth when your fingers massaged the nape of his neck.

"You're such a fucking idiot," you whispered against his lips. "You're like, the dumbest person I've ever met. Your IQ is so low that-"

"Okay, okay. I get it." he chuckled, shaking his head in disbelief. "I'm sorry. I genuinely am. I'm sorry for making you feel like I don't love you- because I do, I love you so much that it's physically painful."

"I thought you were tougher than that, Bucky."

"I'm just a coward, honey." with a shrug, he pulled you closer to his embrace. "I'm just a fucking coward, nothing more. But you know what? Seeing you so angry at me, telling me that I don't deserve to know anything about you- that hurt more. I guess I- I really can't be without you."

"I can't be without you either," you sighed. "I've been so cranky, just ask Clint."

"Oh, I'm still kicking his ass."

"No, Buck," a soft giggle left your lips. "He actually plays a grand part in me forgiving you. And he's one of my favorite people in this whole world, so, I won't hesitate to punch you if you ever yell at him again."

"In that case, I'm thanking him. And kicking his ass in my head."

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samicakes-exe · 4 months

Note

Hi, I loved the hatefucking jtk fic and I was wondering if you could do a part 2 where maybe he is jealous about something happening between the reader and someone else and he "reminds" the reader who she belongs to; or maybe into a crazy discussion jeff throatfuck the reader ( I'm sorry for being a lewd bitch and my lack in fantasy but your writing is so well done and is my first time requesting someone so feel free to consider or not my request :3 ) take care <3

AHHH! I am so happy that I am ur first request! and I hope that I make you proud hun! Also Dont apologize for being a lewd bitch! Lewd bitches are welcomed here!!! am very excited to make the Jeff fic into a little series! so without further ado here is the fic! going to start these specific type of fics with the title!

OKAY SO I MAY HAVE STORED THIS IN MY DRAFTS FOR MONTHS HOLY SHIT IM SO SORRY- um so imma just release it without editing it sooooo sorry to the jeff fuckers i’ll get better food to you soon pls 🧎‍♀️

words:

ᴡᴏʀᴅꜱ ʜᴜʀᴛ, ʏᴏᴜ ᴋɴᴏᴡ? <3

(throat-fucking version!)

warning: Jealous toxic toxic Jeff. Roughness, dub-con???? probs dub-con im so sorry (maybe non-con i dunno i wanna make sure!!), a little bit of angst, tears, Public like you could get caught, throat-fucking, Jeff pushes your head. Afab reader, use of feminine pet names, only Jeff getting off. V toxic, Jeff is sweet at the end???, light aftercare, arguing/fighting, Barely edited rip

ℚ𝕦𝕚𝕔𝕜 𝕝𝕚𝕝 𝔹𝕦𝕝𝕝𝕖𝕥 𝕃𝕚𝕤𝕥 𝕪𝕒 𝕜𝕟𝕠𝕨:

Jeff is a man of many words (mostly insults) BUT my boy shuts up when his feelings are hurt.

You two's relationship is complicated.

Not quite boyfriend and girlfriend but also not only fuck buddies.

He feels entitled to you.

Sooo seeing you flirt with any other guy in the house sends him over the edge.

He wont confront you out right since he doesn't want anyone else in the house knowing he stands you.

So usually he grabs you when the others are busy- taking you off to a secret corner to have some fun

or HE WILL IGNORE YOU FOR THE REST OF THE DAY!

honestly it's a 50/50 chance

Tonight wasn't any different to the small hang outs the creeps occasionally do:

Tim and Brian managed to get their hands on some cases of beer.

BEN is playing music from his "perfected" party playlist

and everyone is having a good time!

except Jeff :(

He's watching you closely from across the living room, his grip on the red solo cup was tight.

You were in the corner with EJ, talking about whatever.

It didn't matter to him.

The lingering touches of Jack's arms.

How you stared up at him, batting your eyes.

How your giggles lasted a little while longer

You couldnt stop smiling

He hated it

He watched EJ slipped away and went over to grab another beer So Jeff made his way to you.

You weren't aware of him until he had his hand wrapped around your arm and roughly pulling you away.

★★★

𝕆𝕟𝕥𝕠 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕊𝕞𝕦𝕥!!!

The crowd was thinning out leaving red solo cups littering the floor. The music still pumped from a small speaker resting up on a bookshelf. There was BEN and LJ still hanging around near the drinks. A couple of other creeps spread out between you and Jeff.

He's kept an eye on you the entire night but now paying closer attention, You were curled up in the corner of the living room with Eyeless Jack close by chatting among yourselves with the same cheap beer in hand.

It put a sour taste in Jeff's mouth.

It was clockwork with every assumed joke, you giggled and playfully touched his arm and it lingered there before falling to your side. Jeff's jaw clenched, teeth pressing against teeth tightly.

Another joke and you were touching him again. This time on his upper arm, a smile stretched wide across your face as you nodded your excited agreement to whatever he said. Jeff couldn't hear over the music playing but the pit in his stomach grew with how long the touch was. He counted the seconds with how tense his jaw gotten by the time your hand dropped back to your side, it was clicking.

Jeff put the cup to his lips and swallowed the last bit of beer, swishing around in his mouth beforehand.

The solo cup ended up being tossed on the couch with a collection of others.

He couldn't pull his eyes away from you for long, watching how innocently you were batting your eyes up at EJ, leaning ever so closer when he spoke.

Whenever Eyeless Jack pulled away however, excusing himself to grab another lukewarm beer. A small pout pulled at the ends of your lips watching him now leave and talk with both LJ and BEN.

At the moment with the rest of the creeps distracted, Jeff strolled up to you and without a word he pulled you by the arm to the hallway.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" He asked, keeping his voice hushed.

"What do you mean what I'm doing?" You asked mimicking the same tone as he was.

"Trying to fuck Jack." He said pointedly.

"Trying to... fuck.. Jack" You repeated it slowly, blinking blankly each time. "I can't have friends now?"

"Y/N Fuck off with that friends bullshit."

"Jeff we're not together." You reminded him. He was slowly starting to get on your nerves now, he always worked you up like this no matter what.

Jeff's squeezed his jaw tight, you were right and how he fucking hated it.

"Knees."

"Excuse me?"

"On your knees now, Y/N"

"As if Jeff... You know you're a real piece of wor-" You were cut off by him shoving you down, your knees buried in the itchy carpet.

"Shut up." He ordered, he wound your hair in his fist pulling it back to force eye contact. "We might not be together but I'm the only one that fucks you, got it?"

"Fuck you." You spat.

"Already did doll, so has every other guy in the house apparently."

You rolled your eyes but stayed on your knees. The bickering starting a warmth between your thighs which made you stay put right where you were. You watched him look around over his shoulder to make sure the coast was clear before his free hand went to his dress pants and fumbled around with the zipper.

You couldnt help but to giggle under your breath which made him yank your hair back.

"Shut up." Despite being a whisper his tone was harsh. With enough effort he finally pulled his hardening cock out of his jeans. "And open that pretty little mouth for me."

You stared up at him with your mouth shut tight and a cocky smile that pulled on your lips. You innocently bat your eyelashes up at him, watching his eyes narrowed.

"I'll make you." He threatened, his grip on your hair got tighter, the nails of his ever so slightly digging into your scalp.

You stayed staring up at him with your mouth tightly shut.

"I warned you." He muttered, a hand of his going and plugging your nose tightly.

Your eyes flew opened and you tried to keep your mouth shut for the longest time but you felt a deep burn build up to your lungs. Holding it in was making the burn climb up your throat. Finally you gave in, opening your mouth and taking the first greedy breath in.

"Good girl." Jeff chimed, and he quickly pushed his cock into your open mouth, pushing about halfway in. "Was that so hard?"

You looked up at him with your eyes narrowed and he reqarded your mean stare with another shallow thrust of his hips. He leaned his head back and moaned softly, forcing your mouth deeper on his cock.

You placed both hands on his thighs while gagging around his cock, eyes watering up when he hit the back of your throat with one deep push of his hips.

He looked back down at you, seeing how red your face has gotten only spurred him on, He quickened his thrusts into your mouth leaving you sitting and drooling all over his cock.

"God Doll." He moaned, pushing your head to meet with his thrusts. "I forgive you~ I forgive you~" He whispered cocky sorrys while he filled your throat.

He watched you drool on his cock, face red and a couple of tears cutting a cold line in them. You dug your nails into his thighs while you held on.

He wasn't going to last long, not that he cared.

"Oh fuck!" He whined out softly, now struggling to keep his voice low. He fucked your mouth faster, holding onto your head with both hands as he was nearing his release. He whispered out many intelligible praises and curses. "Cumming!" He grunted out.

With one final thrust deep in your throat he finally came, letting out soft moans as he gently pumped your mouth to make sure you had every last drop. Soon he pulled out, looking down at you. A cocky smile against his carved one.

"Was i to rough on you doll?" He asked, shoving himself back into his pants and zipping up before leaning down and offering you a hand.

You took it and he pulled you up. "No.. Could warn me next time." You laughed.

"Where's the fun in that?"

#jeff the killer x reader smut #creepypasta smut #smut #creepypasta x reader smut #jeff the killer smut

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amypihcs · 5 months

Text

So i'm dead.

@contact-guy's beautiful comic (i loved it, truly, it killed me.) and watching Hellsing with an offline friend of mine killed me THROUGHLY.

And since i fear i'm figuring out how Holmes and Watson's relationship will evolve into @contact-guy's comic serie i'll curse you with the HCs i made with my dear @i-dont-talk-for-days-on-end today talking about my future drawing of Watson with his loves, Holmes and Mary.

You can probably tell i'm emotionally devastated because my writing is more inconsistent than my usual.

So.

For me is very important that Mary gets treated well, since she exists in canon and is a fantastic woman. And i also love to think that she and Holmes are friends, after all they both love Watson.

My take is, Watson and Mary have kind of a façade marriage based on good friendship and comradeship but without love and generally without sex.

This could work in two ways, both of which are incredibly nice one:

Aroace Mary who needs some sort of social respectability coming from a marriage and got lucky enough to find a man as good and kind as Watson who is more than willing to help her to achieve it without endangering her

Lesbian or Bi Mary in a relationship with a girl, probably her ex employer, could be someone else, who still needs the respectability and stability coming from a marriage and is still lucky enough to find our favourite bisaster, Dr John H. Watson, who is also bisexual and in a relationship with a man and would benefit a lot from the cover of a respectable marriage.

The first one is rather easy to treat. Watson and Mary make good friends during Sign of Four, Holmes notices/guesses that Mary is acespec like him (my Headcanon for Holmes is that he is demigay) and when Watson proposes and she accepts they put immediately straight that it won't be a consummated marriage, ever.

The second one develops in the same way, and this makes so much more explainable the many times Mary is mentioned to be away visiting relatives in canon. Mary is with her partner, Watson is with his partner.

Now angst warning!

Sherlock Holmes looks very favorably upon Watson's marriage, he is in fact the one that pushes Watson into it, and for very good reasons.

Let's put sign of four in 1887, alright? Chances are high he was already pursuing Moriarty, or that he generally was realizing more and more the risk of dying on the job, well, Holmes is a smart man. And a clever, practical and caring one as well. he is a man who loves deeply and cares deeply and wants to always have his affairs in order.

Is it too much of a stretch to imagine that he realizes the higher and higher risk of SOMETHING BAD happening? I don't think so. And he knows that Watson could get caught in the crossfire and he wants of course to protect Watson and offer him some saving net.

He pushes Watson into this marriage that will not mean the end of their relationship but the creation of another meaningful relationship for his love, so that SHOULD I DIE he will have someone to help him weather the storm (would watson care, would he? nobody ever did, but WATSON. Watson cares for everyone... would watson care...). The marriage also means that he will go back into practice, and this is an economic safe net, something always good. Their relationship is of course carefully concealed but such a handsome, sociable, perfect man as Watson is staying unmarried and living with a bachelor friend might give rouse to suspects, marriage will give his incredible partner respectability, something Moriarty or anybody won't dare to attack without sure cards in his hands, and Holmes will make sure NOBODY has any such cards.

Holmes is no coward, but he's not stupid either. He knows his job is dangerous and it might lead to really bad things happening, so he is happy when Watson tells him Mary said yes. He is happy on the morning of the wedding, he is the man who ties Watson's tie and then kisses his lips. He tells his husband to go marry, enjoy his honeymoon and start his life with his wife. And then come back to him, to their rooms and their love. And they both will have tears in their eyes. Holmes will not be at the cerimony, nor will Mary's wife. But they will always support their partners.

Holmes OF COURSE will sulk for a bit, until Scandal in Bohemia. He did what was right, but he still feels lonely. And then Watson comes back. And they're together once more, they're in love and they can break the world apart. And then comes 1890. Watson is a bit more settled down, Holmes has his affairs in order, he can set to the work of his life. And then comes 1891.

Holmes is afraid.

They set fire to their rooms. Home is not safe anymore.

Reichenbach comes.

Holmes is not suicidal, he is terrified. And yet he will once more put Watson's happiness in front of his own. He will not put his husband in front of an impossible choice. He drafts a letter in his head. He leaves it under a silver cigarette case.

He can't imagine he will only see his husband three years later.

His plans worked and failed. But they're back together. Holmes will finally talk. There's a broken window in 221b Baker Street, they're both older, more tired. A bit sad at how things turned out. Mary is dead. Holmes couldn't have forseen that. And yet after some days, after a dinner. Watson will pat the empty spot on his left on the couch, he's still sitting in the center. He will hug Holmes close to his chest, they will remember the times all three of them hugged, Watson and his loves, Mary on the right, Holmes on the left. Holmes on the heart's side, Mary on the reason's side. They will cry. And remember. And be glad for what have been and look forward to what will be.

They're older, more sure of themselves. Watson's status as a widower is respectable enough, he murmurs in the dark. He will only be married to one man for the rest of his life. The following morning, Holmes presents Watson with a French gold coin, for his Watch chain. That will be their ring, their memento.

Years will pass, they will retire, they will always be together, because they never lived, so they can never die. Outside the rain pours and the cabs rattle in the streets.

And it is.

Always.

1895.

Okay, sorry for the immense rant, i have tears streaming down my face, my j'accuse is up in the first lines and it's also my thank you for getting the balls to write this rant on holmes, watson and mary.

#victorian husbands #sherlock holmes #john watson #mary morstan #mary watson

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wonjns · 2 years

Text

uncanny ii. resemblance ∯

♡° pairing. . . lee heeseung x male reader

♡° genre. . . smut, fluff, angst

♡° summary. . . so you ended up with your twin sister’s boyfriend... what a turn of events. heeseung is definitely your dream guy, but little did you expect all of what exactly would unfold once you got him.

♡° includes. . . bottom!reader, even more horny bisexual hee!! lmao, lots & lots of kissing, dry humping, possessive heeseung, finger sucking, car sex (almost), blow job, orgasm prolonging, unprotected sex (dont irl!!)

♡° wc. . . 7k

°A/N. . . requested by many !! months & months later... finally 😮💨, i am so happy to be posting this!! i had no idea that so many of you would enjoy Uncanny, & i never intended on adding a second part. im just so mad it took me so long to write— so i’m sorry guys, i really hope its not awful !!!

. . . .% Part 1 ♡ % . . . .

ㅤ

“so.... you two are now... dating...?”

three pairs of very beady yet confused eyes lingered before you in your family living room. their glances examined you head to toe, along with a certain 6' ft male who stood beside you.

you could feel your palm growing clammy in heeseung’s hold as you both timidly nodded, desperate to read the intent behind the deadpanned expression on your parents’ faces.

despite heeseung’s tall and stronger build, he almost felt his weakening knees give from beneath him as he caught eye contact with your sister-- his ex-- who had an ominously suspicious look on her face. he had seen this expression on her quite often, but was never the recipient. it was less than ideal.

“well, y/n, do you really like him?” your mother chimed, her puzzled tone cracking the silence.

all you could do was nod once again, slightly more fervently at the question. if only ‘like’ was enough to describe your feelings for the equally-as-nervous boy who stood fiddling with your fingers.

“and heeseung? do you really like my son?” your father spoke up this time, eyebrows transfixed as he sunk deeper into his leather recliner.

heeseung found himself only able to offer a shy nod as well, the soles of his shoes feeling as if they were hovering over lava from the heat of the atmosphere.

“words, son.” your dad sternly quipped.

it was unbelievable to heeseung how these two adults, whom he'd usually seen as secondary parents, suddenly felt like stone cold, life-sentencing supremes.

“yes–” the poor boy coughed, clearing his throat. “yes sir.”

the fluttering of your heart after hearing his confession out loud threatened to distract you from the anxiety that surged through your nerves, but one glance up at your sister snatched you back to reality.

you couldn’t believe any of this was actually happening. normally, you and your twin shamelessly spilled everything you thought and felt to one another without a second thought - but you could only feel like shit as your mind resurfaced flashbacks of heeseung working your body in ways you’d only dreamt about, while your sibling, who just so happened to be his former lover, lingered cluelessly outside your room.

you and the older male had debated often after your first hookup whether or not this was something you guys should make public, out of fear of what your sister would think.

but you knew you were too in love with heeseung– and always have been, to keep things suppressed. especially since neither of you showed signs of leaving what happened as a simple one night stand. so you chose the route of honesty, which lead you to the painfully awkward confession in front of your high council of family members.

“okay.” your mother, sister, and father chirped in a perky unison.

the air shifted, the imaginary weight your shoulders bore suddenly vanishing into nothingness.

“okay!?” you and heeseung blurted in an equally perplexed harmony.

“yeah, okay!” your sister responded, on her own this time.

she uncrossed her folded arms, picking up the laundry basket she was previously interrupted from lugging to her room. “whatever keeps mr. clingy out of my hair so often. he’s a lot like an abandoned puppy at times, you know... was starting to get a bit draining.”

“i’m... right here, you know.” heeseung mumbled out in response to your sister’s teasing. you noticed the tint of his cheeks growing red and couldn’t help but softly chuckle.

“honey, don’t be a bully.” your dad replied before your parents emitted a couple giggles themselves.

“i’m sure what she meant to say was,” your mother started, standing to grab her purse and approach heeseung. “we love having you around. you’ve been a part of this family for some time now, so as long as you take care of our son as well as you did our daughter, there’s no reason for us to not give you our blessing.”

and with that, she gave heeseung and yourself a quick peck to the cheeks before sauntering out of the room. she was followed shortly by the others, leaving just the two of you motionless as mannequins; both dumbfounded.

that was... easy. too easy.

the back of your head landed gently against your pillows as heeseung pressed a deep kiss into your lips, giddy giggles escaping the both of you.

the taller male’s hands casually roamed under your tank top as his mouth nearly swallowed you whole, pliantly groaning as he felt your fingers dance into his locks. his confidence was through the roof, the adrenaline from the confession still running ramped through his bones.

he rolled his hips flush into yours, smirking into the makeout after absorbing one of your small whimpers.

“what... even just happened?” you sighed out as heeseung moved to nip at your jaw.

“i have no fucking clue.” he chuckled between nibbles on your sensitive skin, tracing over the area under your ear with his eager tongue.

you moaned, tugging his head back to reconnect your lips and feel that very tongue glide over yours. you reveled in the feeling of his hands massaging you beneath your shirt, not even the slightest bit surprised when he lifted it high enough to place kisses on your tummy.

“i just don’t- seriously... how did we pull that off??” you babbled, genuinely baffled while heeseung adjusted between your legs into an easier position for planting pecks along your hips.

he hummed into your skin, propping one of your legs around his torso. “i don’t know, i guess we’re way better than we thought.”

heeseung’s kisses started growing hungrier, and he took the liberty to suck a few marks on the surface of your stomach amidst your confused rambling. your hips started instinctively rolling into his chest, and you bit back a moan from the friction of your member grinding against his solid pecs.

“seunggie, wait, literally everyone is still home...”

“so? we got the green light, didn’t we?” the boy taunts before playfully tugging on the waistband of your shorts.

you chuckle before nudging his hands away, scooting yourself back to sit up against your bed’s headboard. “i think so... but let’s talk about that first.”

heeseung huffed while blinking his gorgeous lashes at you, dramatically hovering above the empty silhouette of where your body was.

“talk about...?”

“well, the word my parents used. dating.” you uttered as if it were a curse word.

“you... want to talk about the word ‘dating’?” he questioned, shifting to prop his head up with an elbow.

“not the word itself, stupid- i just..... i think-” you stumbled, laughing to yourself while also resisting that familiar rosy blush from spreading on your cheeks. "i think if we’re officially a thing...”

heeseung hesitatingly nodded along with your words, his beautiful brown orbs watching you intently as if he was trying to read your mind.

“then shouldn’t we, like, do the things people who date do before we keep messing around? like,, don’t we have to do that sappy couple stuff before sex?”

heeseung couldn’t help but release a loud chuckle at your adorableness, attempting to muffle it in a nearby pillow. god, you wanted to at least pretend to be aggravated, but his laugh was just too damn cute.

“you’ve never dated anyone, have you?” he asked when he eventually finished his cackles.

“...is it that obvious?” you chime, your signature blush undeniably as present as ever.

the older boy cooed at you, quickly sitting up and pulling you into the empty space between his lap. he pecked your lips, running his thumb along the bridge of your nose and fondly examining your flustered face, a little too long for your liking, before finally speaking up.

“i mean, if my baby boy wants a date, then that’s what we’ll do. you’re right, we should get to know each other more first.”

you wanted to melt into a puddle and trickle all over his lap right then and there, and absolutely would if you physically could. you felt small, but protected, under heeseung’s gaze. something about the way he looked at you made your insides ignite with a feeling you’d never felt so intensely before, and you started to realize you were down… bad.

“okay!” you triumphed brightly.

you cupped your hands around his neck, leaning forward to place a soft kiss on his forehead before staring back into his eyes.

“where do you wanna go?” heeseung inquired, nonchalantly leaning back on his arms propped behind him.

“i don’t know? we just established i’m the one who’s never done this before!” you admitted while shifting your eyes down to his prominent adams apple, grazing your finger over it.

“fine, it’ll be a surprise. and you’re gonna love it. this friday.”

everything just sounded so cool coming from him, and he spoke in that careless manner that was just too hot to keep you focused.

“perfect,” you feigned confidence, having transitioned to fiddling with his hoodie’s drawstrings. “and... no more kissing until then.”

heeseung let out an exaggerated gasp, eyebrows furrowing at you.

you could only chuckle before being completely tackled back into your mattress, your boyfriend’s lips as relentless as ever.

so much for that rule.

two weeks later, you and heeseung were sickeningly attached by the hips— and lips— more than ever.

the boy had swooped you off your feet in every sense of the term. he took you on your first date, a dual movie-picnic date on his front lawn wrapped in warm blankets (all too cliché, but still didn’t fail to spark a storm of butterflies in your stomach), which led to your second. and then third. and then fourth... and they only got better each time.

after living a long, agonizing year of being secretly infatuated with him, you weren’t sure if it were physically possible to even fall for this guy any more.

yet, you were wrong.

through solely a few mere weeks, myriad of walks around town, and late night drives, you were seeing so many more sides of heeseung than you could’ve imagined. his charms, humor, honesty, chivalry, and even his flaws. you were taking in all of it. and he was learning so much more about you, beyond the fact of being the former love of his life’s twin brother.

you were growing obsessed with each other, and it showed. at no point in the day could heeseung keep his hands to himself anymore, and you were hardly complaining.

it even came down to the time you had to actually pry his lips from your neck in a public restaurant so that a stunned waitress, the unfortunate soul to serve your table, could finally take your order.

he just loved to show you off;

no matter where you were.

his tinge of possessiveness was a bit embarrassing at first, but god it was kinda hot. you were so caught up in the total package of lee heeseung that you hardly had sense to worry about anything else; not caring if you were in the seclusion of your rooms or a grocery store parking lot when he would snake one of his hands down your pants to greet your erection.

every little thing he did drove you crazy, and even more so vice versa.

little did you know, heeseung was operating from a slightly different source of obsession.

you sat in the passenger seat of heeseung's red mercedes, soft rnb music playing through your boyfriend's speakers as one of his hands securely held the back of your neck while he lathered your lips in passionate, lustful kisses.

you moaned as heeseung swirled his tongue in your mouth, taking his sweet time in tasting you and using his free hand to guide yours down to his crotch. you were hesitant, but couldn't resist pressing your palm to his member to feel how hard he already was.

heeseung exhaled from the pleasure, wasting no time in maneuvering your hand beneath his waistband. he swallowed a gasp that escaped your lips once he started shamelessly bucking his hips up into your hold.

it took strength, but you willed yourself to break apart from the kiss and give him a nervous look, considering the two of you were parked in front of his parent's house in broad daylight.

"babe," you spoke, catching your breath. "we're about to go inside, we shouldn't."

your boyfriend smirked at you, hearing your warning but noticing how you still hadn't retracted your hand from inside his pants. his eyes also caught the slowly forming tent in your own jeans.

"exactly, that's why we should get this out of the way now." he half whined, needily leaning over into your space and tugging at your hips. "my mom takes forever to get dinner ready, you know I can't wait."

his plush lips were immediately on your neck before you could rebut, him aiming straight for your weak spot. damn, he knew exactly how to kill your resolve in an instant.

you rolled your eyes, partially from annoyance but also from the way he groaned while sucking on your soft flesh. you fumbled a bit, climbing over the center console and settling atop of his thighs. his satisfied grin only grew wider before rushing to capture your lips again, his kisses as addicting as ever.

heeseung's large hands roamed up and down your back as he widened his jaw to deepen the kiss, and quickly settled them on your hips to grind you forwards on his lap.

your arms found purchase on his broad shoulders as you molded your mouths more fervently. heeseung repeated the action in a rhythm, pleased by how simple it was to get reactions out of you.

jolts of excitement tingled through your legs as your clothed bulges ran along each other, the feeling heavenly as you began bucking your hips on your own accord without his assistance. heeseung's hands snuck their way under your shirt and returned to roaming your back. he gently dragged his short nails along your skin, causing goosebumps to grow array all over you.

your own hands began unbuttoning his flannel and dipping under his collar, the familiar smoothness of his shoulders warm on your fingertips, helping settle your anxieties of being seen by the neighbors, or worse– his own parents who were inside the house mere steps away.

you couldn't understand how heeseung always had you in these sort of positions, but judging from the rock hard length pressing between your thighs, he was clearly into it.

heeseung could still feel your nervousness, and leaned back amused as he watched the embarrassment and pleasure battle for dominance on your face. he kissed the tip of your nose and chuckled.

"your sister used to love making out to this song." he mumbled in a low tone, dipping down to wrap his lips around your adams apple while simultaneously turning up the radio's volume.

you could barely register the odd statement as you threw your head back, eyes fluttering closed when heeseung started suckling and licking on the column of your throat in sync with the melodic tune that filled the car.

it was bliss, but just as you felt yourself drawing close to your high, the sentence rang through your head again.

your sister? this song? in this car?

suddenly, the image of your sister being in your exact same position– which she undoubtedly had been in several times before, flashed through your mind.

it caused you to jolt a little bit. heeseung paid no mind to the sudden action, thinking it was another one of your cute responses to his ministrations.

"uhm... hee?" your hips slowed to a halt, a bit of that familiar guilt settling into you again.

at first you thought it was just mindless sex talk, but as you had delved deeper into your official relationship with heeseung, you caught on to how often he would still talk about your twin, consistently making comparisons and recalling similarities between the two of you.

he wasn't necessarily wrong, but it was getting weirder as it progressed. you had just convinced yourself it was natural due to how similar you were with your sibling, and kept things pushing without dwelling on it for too long.

"hee?" you spoke again, opening your eyes when you hadn't gotten a response.

he hummed against your neck, sloppy kisses never ending in the crook of your neck. you managed to draw back, gently pushing his shoulders to disconnect from his lips. he looked at you quizzically, yet adoration still beaming in his eyes.

"i've been meaning to talk to you about-"

you were cut off by the abnormally loud ringing of his cell phone, which sat lodged in one of the car's cup holders. he sighed, telling you to wait just a moment when he read the caller id.

"hello? yeah mom, we just pulled up. we're coming in now." he exhaled, gently rubbing your thigh.

a huff of disappointment left your nose, but you were semi-grateful you didn't actually have to have the awkward conversion right before meeting his parents.

you gathered yourself back together, clasping the first few buttons of heeseung's shirt back together for him as he flattened the small wrinkles on yours.

he opened the car door, helping you climb out of his lap and onto the pavement, where you readjusted yourself in the reflection of the car's glass.

"after you, prince." heeseung gestured to his home's front door.

"but, it's your house." you responded.

"yeah, but... mom likes it when people make strong first impressions." the older boy grinned.

you took your bottom lip in between your teeth, a pool of nervousness returning to your gut as you realized you really had never met heeseung's parents before.

sure, they were all too familiar with your sister from their year together, but you were an entirely different story - an entirely more complicated story.

you knocked on the large glass front door nervously, heeseung standing just behind your shoulder. he leaned down to whisper.

"they don't take to strangers very well. if you get scared, tap my leg. they can be pretty tough."

heeseung was a liar.

you had received nothing but beaming smiles and suffocating hugs as soon as you stepped through the door.

you had prepared to walk into a homophobic hellfire, not knowing what sort of glares and comments would be thrown your way. setting the fact that you were a boy aside, you still had plenty to worry about.

heeseung left a committed relationship, albeit not by his own choice, just to end up with his girlfriend’s brother was quite a unique situation - yet it seems his parents hadn’t even thought about that as they chattered away through dinner table conversation. shit, the wholesome smile you were met with the second his mom opened the door would be tattooed in your mind forever.

“so, y/n dear, heeseung hasn’t been giving you too much trouble now, has he?” his mother asked as she cut her steak into tiny pieces from across the table.

“our son can be so lazy sometimes,” his dad chimed in with a chuckle. “gotta make sure he’s not constantly slacking off.”

you laughed, feeling like heeseung was being regarded as your new employee. you caught a slight frown on his face from his parents teasing, and you reached up to run your hand through his hair.

“i guess you could say he isn’t too bad.”

he looked to you quickly, an adoring smile growing, seemingly grateful you hadn’t joined in his parent’s shenanigans. or so he thought.

“except for when he takes forever to get out of bed. or to go run errands. or to-”

“alright!” he huffed, frustratingly spooning some food together on his plate.

you all erupted with laughter, he was so cute when he pouted. it was nice seeing lee heeseung, the confident athlete, get all blushy and shy around his parents - his usual commanding demeanor nowhere to be found as he sheepishly shoveled broccoli into his cheeks. yet another side of him you hadn’t expected to see, but made you fall just a little more.

you found yourself in heeseung’s room after dinner, a surprise to no one, after helping his parents clean the dishes afterwards.

you had taken the opportunity to spend more time laughing and teasing heeseung alongside his parents, so it was no shocker that he quickly whisked you away to his own private space - desperate to have all of your attention fully on him.

you giggled as you were ushered into his bedroom, his hands never leaving your waist until the door was securely shut.

“your parents are so much fun.” you beamed at the taller boy whose blush still lingered on his face.

“yeah, probably a little too much fun.” he huffed, walking over and plopping on his bed.

your eyes fondly gazed around his bedroom, surprisingly still somewhat childlike, figurines and pictures of his youth still lining the shelves. a genuine smile grew on your face. you really shouldn’t be shocked, he did often have the tendencies of a big baby.

“you know, mr. lee, you’re not all that of a tough guy.” you commented, reaching up to examine one of his action figures.

“oh, really? what makes you think that?” he chuckled back, discreetly unbuttoning his shirt while you were distracted.

“yeah… i don’t know why you put up the act so often, you’re really just a little softie. like i remember whe-” the words halted in their tracks when you turned to taunt him more, but froze at the view of his toned abs glaring right at you, jeans slightly lowered on his hips.

“is that so?” he responded lowly, tilting his head to the side. “why don’t you bring that little ass over here and see how much of a softie i really am?”

his words sent a wave of arousal straight to your cock, which you immediately tried to will from springing to action so quickly.

you let out a half-spirited scoff, trying to appear unbothered as he sat there and widened his legs while staring you down. but damn, the golden evening light that shone through his window was hitting him in all the right places. his solid abdomen lured you in while he lolled his head back, teasing you with the prominent grooves of his neck that had you practically squeezing your legs together.

damnit, he was temptation personified – too effortlessly hot for you to resist.

before you knew it your legs brought you to stand between his. he cocked an eyebrow before giving you another annoyingly sexy smirk and nodding his chin towards your own top.

“off.”

your face instantly surged with heat, but you couldn’t help but obey with the sudden authority he spoke with. in seconds your shirt was discarded and on the floor by his feet, a chill crawling across your topless chest.

“you know, i’m not really a fan of how much you used my parents to tease me tonight,” he said monotonously, raking a warm hand up your exposed torso. “i think you were enjoying it wayyy too much.”

his thumb found one of your perked nipples, rubbing in firm circles. you moaned at the sensation, just to hurriedly cover your mouth with your own hand, the realization that you were at his parents’ house hitting you once again.

“hee… wait.” you responded, attempting to take a step back.

heeseung only chuckled before catching you still with his free arm, continuing to play with your sensitive bud.

“where’s all the laughter now? you were having so much fun earlier, remember? let's keep that fun going.”

your boyfriend then leaned in to run his warm tongue over your other exposed nipple, causing you to hold back another whimper as your hands flew to his hair. he pulled your body closer as he started suckling on the bud, and you didn’t have it in you to fight it anymore. once he started working his mouth on you like this, you were puddy.

you cursed how weak you were to his actions, but even he could sense how badly you wanted him at all times.

“s-someones the jealous type, huh?” you stuttered, sounding way less intimidating than you wanted. “even over your parents, hm?”

he released your bud with a wet pop, dark eyes shooting straight up to yours before returning his lustful gaze to your body. your limbs started to quake with desire.

“how could i not be? when i have all of this just for me…”

both of his hands held your hips as he licked a long, teasing strip up your torso before finishing it with a peck to your chest. he locked eyes with you again, his determined pupils staring deep into your trembling, desperate ones. he enunciated his next words slow and smooth, like honey.

“just… for… me…”

you pounced first. you couldn’t take it anymore, the alluring mischief in his eyes and addictive touch all over your physique had you grinding your topless bodies together like animals. your limbs entangled with his as your mouths waged war together, the possessive bites against your lips sending your mind into a daze.

he effortlessly flipped you over, taking the advantage to grind down on you even stronger one last time before working the zipper of your jeans. he stripped the both of you down to your boxers in record time, licking his lips as he watched you begin to palm your own growing bulge - putting on a show for him.

“you’re going to absolutely kill me.” heeseung muttered, trying to control the raging need surging throughout him.

“your parents might do that for me, if they catch us.” you speak with a newfound confidence, hiding the fact that you were completely mortified of that exact occurrence.

heeseung chuckled before shimmying your last layer of underwear off, leaving you fully exposed for him as he lowered his own and started pumping his unbelievably large member.

“we won’t have to worry about it if you can stay quiet, prince.”

you thought heeseung was about to just dive into you raw as he lowered his muscular body to yours, but relaxed when you felt him reach under his pillow to grab a bottle of lube. your eyes grew wide.

“you planned this!” you gasped, fauxing a complaint.

“shh shhh.” heeseung hushed you, tapping his fingers against your lips.

narrowing your gaze at him, you didn’t hesitate to trap his fingers between your lips, emitting a low groan from your throat as you ran your tongue over his digits. you successfully caught him off guard, if his quiet gasp was anything to go by, but a sly grin crept on his face.

“naughty boy, trying to do my job for me. are you that excited?” he commented before yanking his digits from your mouth, chuckling at your pout.

he leaned down to swiftly place a flurry of pecks on your plump lips while lubing his fingers up, right before he reached down to push them into your entrance. you moaned into the air much louder than before, causing his other hand to toss the bottle of lube and clamp your mouth shut.

“god, baby, do you want them to hear us? control yourself.” he smirked, finding all too much pleasure in the way your eyes rolled back when he began pumping his digits in and out of you.

a mantra of muffled sounds flew from your mouth into heeseung’s palm, and thankfully so, since your body had already compromised your self control. when he finally pulled his fingers from your ass, you whined at the loss of contact.

“heeseung, please fuck me already. please.” you breathlessly begged once he removed his palm from your mouth.

again, heeseung mercilessly chuckled down at your state.

“such a needy boy… so fucked out and i haven’t even done much.”

you wanted to banter back like you usually would, but this man had already reduced you into such a desperate mess with nothing but a couple minutes and his hands. he learned so quickly how your body worked, and how much of an affect his words had on you. once you were turned on by him, you wanted– needed every ounce of him as soon as you could have him.

feeling merciful, heeseung lined up his girth with your entrance, pushing in slowly. this time, it was an equal struggle for both of you to keep yourselves quiet, the size of his length and intense look into your eyes causing you to melt while your hole sucked him in so desperately.

“fuck, fuck. still such a tight ass. my boyfriend really loves my cock, hm?” heeseung grunted, trying to keep himself together when he saw tears of pleasure form at the corner of your eyes.

you nodded your head, unable to form words at the pleasurable pain you felt. your fingers curled into his dark locs as he lowered his head to sink his teeth into your neck, sucking marks there in order to keep quiet. you were fighting with everything in you to not scream and beg him for more, for him to fully consume you.

“h-hee,” you whined, trying to keep it a whisper. “more.”

your hands sprawled along his toned back, feeling his muscles ripple as he began rutting his hips into yours, releasing deep moans into your neck. the vibration had you feel like you were levitating, a sensation only heeseung seemed to bring you.

legs sliding along his strong thighs, you wrapped them around his torso as he picked up in speed, your vision blurring over at his power.

“you’re so sexy, baby. sucking me in so well, making me lose my fucking mind.” he commented between the harsh nips along your jaw, sweat starting to bead around his forehead. “what if my parents came in here and saw me wrecking you like this? would you like that? my mom seeing me do all of this to you right here after breaking up with your sister.”

you squeezed your legs tighter around his torso as he spoke, causing you to moan out loud once feeling your leaky cock rub against his solid abs. before heeseung could shush you, you clenched down on his fat length while your liquids shot out over his chest - him finding the moment so hot that it was only a second before he was emptying out in you as well.

he collapsed on top of you after as you both silently gasped for breath, but you welcomed the crushing feeling.

you couldn’t believe you just screwed him in his childhood room, with his parents just on the other side of the door, praying they didn’t hear you. but knowing how turned on heeseung was by risks, you should’ve known this was gonna be how the night would end.

after just sitting in eachothers embrace for a while, you finally sat up, heeseung leaning over to place even more kisses on your glossed over lips, never getting enough of you.

“lets get cleaned up and head to bed, prince. my parent’s already know you’re staying the night.”

“staying the night?” you questioned tilted your head. you saw another sinister glint in his eye as he kissed you one more time.

“yeah, you still gotta meet my grandparents tomorrow.”

you drug your feet through the threshold of your home, utterly exhausted. it had been a long day of class, filled with a suspicious amount of exams and lectures compared to normal, but you were relieved to finally be done with the day.

heeseung had texted you just as you had begun driving home, telling you he was already at your place helping your dad with chores around the house. you smiled to yourself, still giddy over how perfect he was and thankful for the loving relationship between him and your family – you couldn’t wait to finally see him after such a draining day.

it was oddly silent as you walked through the house, failing to have found heeseung when visiting your parent’s room in hopes to collapse in his arms as soon as possible.

you heard giggling rise in volume as you crossed the house and neared your room. you drew closer to your door, hearing muffled sounds just behind it. when you curiously turned the doorknob, the sight of heeseung looming over your twin sister, mouth practically devouring her, caused you to stand frozen - blood running cold under your skin.

you stood speechless, tears beginning to well as you watched their lips passionately interlock in a noisy makeout just like they had done months before, tongues brazenly running along each other as wanton moans filling the atmosphere.

you tried to speak but could only choke out a sob, your knees threatening to betray you. heeseung and your sister paused, turning their heads towards you after hearing the sound. they both stared at you pathetically, and simply chuckled before heeseung returned his grip on your own headboard, continuing to thrust his tongue into your sister’s mouth - the latter resuming to claw at your boyfriend’s naked back and moaning smugly.

you were stunned, and wanted to scream, cry, or throw anything you could get your hands on at them…

but instead, you woke up.

your body jolted up in bed, met with a dimmed room and a ray of moonlight beaming onto you - reflecting a sheen of sweat on your face.

glancing around the darkened room, your eyes found the clock at read 1:25 am. not far from your line of sight was heeseung himself sprawled out beside you, softly snoring away with an arm draped over your waist. you noticed you were in one of his baggy shirts, the previously comforting smell almost causing you to grow nauseous.

you couldn’t control your breathing, stinging feelings of betrayal and embarrassment still burning in your gut from your dream - rather, nightmare.

you let out a deep sigh once you finally realized everything you had seen in your sleep state wasn’t real… everything except the tears. you felt salty droplets drip from your chin and onto heeseung’s arm, who began to stir.

humiliated, you tried to shuffle back down into your prior position in order to avoid waking up heeseung, failing to soften your fast breathing or stop your flow of tears.

but alas, as if your uncomfortability set off an inner alarm of his, heeseung had awoken. you felt him lean up on his elbow, arm lazily pulling you towards him.

“whats wrong, y/n?” he asked in a groggy voice.

immediately, another stream of tears raced down your cheek at the sound of his voice. it was embarrassing how worked up you had managed to get from a simple dream, but you almost felt sick even being this close to him, although he had done nothing wrong.

it had finally become too much; your insecurity and constant comparisons to your sister had caught up to you. the continuous chipping away at your rose-colored view of heeseung had ultimately found you, and it hurt like a bitch. your intrusive thoughts were convincing you that you were nothing but a rebound-by-blood, a second best option.

refusing to have heeseung see you like this - a sobbing mess in the middle of the night, you remained facing away from him, not answering his initial call.

“y/n.” he spoke again, a little more cognisant. he turned your body over, squinting at you through the dim lighting, before his eyes gently widened. “what happened? bad dream?”

he was right, but it was more so your subconscious so cruelly giving you a visionary of what you had secretly been scared of this whole time. sitting up, you wiped away the wet streaks on your face.

“heeseung… do you like me?”

the older male furrowed his brows. “babe, what? i-”

“im serious. do you like, me?” you insisted, doubt slithering its way onto your expression.

“where the hell is this coming from?” heeseung sighed, pushing himself to fully sit up.

“everytime we’re together, you always talk about her. how much i look like her, sound like her, the things i do… the things we do…"

as much as it pained you to finally ask this question out loud, you couldn't keep it in anymore.

"you’re not over my sister, are you?”

your beady eyes held a tundra of anxiety in them, with heeseung’s almost bulging out of his head.

“you make me feel like i’m not even my own person, hee.” you continued, voice cracking between sobs. “you’re still hung up on her and you just use me, don't you? just to feel like you’re still close to her.”

heeseung was baffled at your accusation, and was ready to rebut everything, until a wave of awareness crashed over him. his gaze softened, hearing the doubt and self-consciousness in your voice. he turned his body to face you directly.

“y/n. i won’t lie to you. when your sister dumped me, my entire world felt like it was shattering. i had gotten use to a life with her, and i did have genuinely strong feelings for her… i thought she was my everything.”

you could feel yet another dam breaking behind your eyelids, closing them shut in order to keep the waterworks from flowing.

“but,” he spoke firmly, taking both of your hands in his before you could retract them. “i love you, y/n. i love you. when i started seeing you, i did think it would just be a way for me to move on, but you are amazing. so fucking amazing. everything you do, all you've done for others,, i’ve fallen so fucking hard for the person that you are. you’ve made me feel things she never did, and never could. i’m sorry i’d been so caught up on your sister before, i guess i just wasn’t ready to move on as soon as i thought. but there is absolutely nobody i’d rather be with than you… right now, in this moment. i promise you that with every fiber of my entire being.”

with that, the well overflowed, streams of tears treading down your skin and landing on the interlocked knuckles of you and heeseung. you knew telling the truth, his words smashing down and easing away each wall of doubt you had in your mind.

you were so unbelievably in love with this man, and a tender wave of relief radiated throughout your body when you caught the reassuring smile he gave you, closing the distance to attach your lips in a loving kiss.

the kiss deepened as you grabbed the sides of his face, pouring all of your emotions into the gates of his lips, melting into the comfort of his affection. his long arms wrapped around you and pulled you under him, meeting no resistance.

he moaned into your mouth when you licked at his lips, letting you in easily. he kissed you sensually, slower than any other time before, refusing to detach your mouths until you absolutely needed to breathe.

“never gonna make you doubt how much i love you again,” he whispered into your neck as he started laying sweet kisses to your soft skin, hands gently roaming every inch of you.

his supple lips felt like heaven as they followed his path down your body, taking his time to suck marks into every inch as he lowered himself. when he reached your hips he left wet open-mouthed kisses along the waistband of your boxers, looking up at you with his beautiful orbs for permission as his hands tugged at the seams.

the butterflies returned when you nodded at him, running your hands along the grooves of his biceps. he removed your underwear, not wasting any time in placing kisses to your shaft, chills shooting up your spine at the sensation. his nose poked at your pelvis as he lightly dragged his lips up to your tip, before taking your length whole in his mouth.

you gasped as the warmth of his mouth, hardly having the energy to react to the pleasure. your head fell to the side of the pillow as your erection was soothed over by heeseung’s talented tongue, flattening along your member licking up and down before he started bobbing his head.

his large hands kept your body still from squirming as he showed your cock attention, occasionally humming and sending more waves of electricity through your legs.

“feel s’good… gonna come.” you muttered not long after he started, only causing a satisfied groan to rumble through his throat.

he released your member and lowered just to prod his tongue at your rim, before suckling gently on your balls and recapturing your cock in his mouth in one swift motion. a couple more strokes of his precise tongue and you were spilling into heeseung’s mouth, shuddering when he didn’t waste a drop.

he repositioned back above your body, and you had only then noticed he’d slept in just his boxers, his neck chain dangling in front of your face. you ran your hands up his toned torso, once again growing obsessed with the feeling of his skin on yours.

the look of utter adoration in his eyes felt heavy on your form, and you could already feel yourself wanting more when he dipped down to place searing kisses to your jaw and grind your hips together.

“i love you baby, let me keep making you feel good.” he spoke, nipping at your earlobe while reaching down to stroke your member back to attention.

“please, baby. i love you too. and i want you so bad, forever.” you admitted, feeling the breath of a light chuckle against your cheek.

just as you wished, his thick length had entered you, gliding along your walls in no time with a delicious friction that you never got tired of. except this time, more than just desire and arousal, the friction brought a comfort, a feeling of love you could feel surging throughout your whole body.

“you can have all of me, whenever you want, prince. i belong only to you.”

#heeseung x male reader #enhypen x male reader #enhypen smut #heeseung smut #enhypen hard hours #kpop male reader #kpop smut #enhypen male reader #kpop x male reader #kpop x reader #male reader smut #lee heeseung #kpop imagines #kpop lgbtq #enhypen fluff

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rat-cannibal · 6 months

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i have no idea if you write for adam, but here i am

i am the ultimate angst asker, if you're okay with that

adam or lute(ilovewomenbumpersticker) x reader who does in the extermination without them knowing.

- FEED ME A BONE,

carcass

aaaa thank you so much for the request!! i am a fellow lover of women, so I will do Lute at a later date. i wasnt too sure about what you meant by 'does in'. i did give you a sad ending though, so hopefully that makes up for it!

how would adam or lute react to the reader finding out about the exterminations? Part 1

- Adam -

you and adam started dating before he started the exterminations

you're an amazing person - kind, sweet, innocent, everything an angel should be. and also everything Adam isn't.

adam is already so insecure about anything that has to do with hell bc lucifer stole his wives (cue pussy eating hand gesture)

so he doesn't even mention it when he starts thinking about the exterminations

you're suspicious, obviously, because he's going off on so many meetings and is becoming more distant

but you dont say anything because you love adam, and he would never lie to you.. would he?

when adam finally gets his extermination team approved, he's overjoyed

he comes home and immediately kisses the shit out of you

You whine as he pulls away from you, your lips swollen and your face flushed. You try to catch your breath. "Not that I'm complaining, but, uh, what exactly was that about?"

Adam grins widely, squeezing your hands. "What, am I not allowed to kiss my beautiful partner hello?" You sense a hint of deceit in his voice, but choose not to question him about it.

you and adam always sleep in the same bed at nights. you have practically since you started dating.

so when one night he doesn't come home, alarm bells immediately go off in your head

is he cheating on you? maybe he found someone else, someone better

no, you reason, surely he's just held up at work

your suspicions only intensify when he returns the following morning, hair tousled and clothing ruffled

he looks exhausted, like he didn't get any sleep. usually this would indicate a long day at work, but theres a smile on his face that paperwork could never cause

dread grows in your stomach

he greets you happily, like nothing's wrong, and you play along, not wanting to fight with your boyfriend about something that could very well have been a misunderstanding

next year, though, when he disappears again and comes back looking thoroughly satisfied, your suspicions are confirmed.

adam is cheating on you.

you're a very conflict-averse person, so these yearly meetings go on for nearly two decades (time works different in heaven ok just roll with it. 1 year = a month to them basically)

eventually, though, you come home from a hard day of work and Adam isn't there.

that pushes you over the edge. you pack a bag and store it in the closet before going back to your room.

you would look for an apartment in the morning. for now, you just want to sleep.

you wake up and join adam in the kitchen for breakfast. he looks like he always does after these meetings - ruffled, yet satisfied.

"Adam," you say simply, "we need to talk."

"Uh-oh," teases Adam, "am I in trouble?"

"Where were you last night?"

Adam swallows thickly. "What?"

You glare at him. "Where were you last night?"

"I was busy with a work thing - you know how it is, babe, they work me to the bone. It's ridiculous."

"Why do you look so happy, then, so fulfilled?" You sigh. "Look, Adam, I know you're cheating on me. I've known for years now. I guess I just hoped you'd have the balls to admit it."

adam tries to frantically explain that he's not cheating on you, that he's been leading a yearly extermination

he would never cheat on you, he loves you

you demand to know what an extermination is, and he tells you in more detail than you ever would have wanted

you listen in silence as he describes the joy he gets from killing demons - from killing human souls

you retrieve your bag and leave your shared apartment for good

adam begs you to stay, says he'll change, that he'll do anything

but you can't be with a murderer

#hazbin fanfic #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel adam #adam x reader #gn reader #x reader #reader #reader insert #angst #heavy angst #sad ending #no happy ending

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rowarn · 1 year

Text

GUIDELINES !

note: this list is being updated as more things need to be added!

note2: if u have a question about whether i will write something, please feel free to ask!

INTERACTIONS!

please don't demand works from me! i appreciate people being excited but there are ways to ask if i am going to write something other than commanding me to do it !

if you're going to ask for a part 2 at least say something nice about what i did write first......cmon.....

do NOT take my works and post on wattpad or any other websites. my works are easily found here and on ao3.

do not send me asks bashing another writer! if someone has done sometime wrong and you feel i need to know, you may inform me but i do not want to be complicit in witch hunts !

i do not engage with call out posts. do not send me call out posts of other people to reblog. i don't care.

use tone tags ! i struggle to discern tone and intent in people's words sometimes !!

DO! (what u will see from me)

♡ dom!cod character

♡ hurt/comfort -- arguments, misunderstandings, trauma comfort, safeword use, sickfics!

♡ abusive themes as long as it's not the character's doing and only in a comfort kind of way; abusive relationships, sexual assault, and things of that nature!

♡ dumbification, dacryphilia, condescension <3

♡ gentle sex, praise, pet names, general soft content -- i can, of course, do rough content and am more than happy to do it!

♡ fuck or die/sex pollen....maybe...?

♡ loss of virginity, established relationships, friends to lovers, enemies to lovers

♡ age gaps

♡ breeding kink — without pregnancy <3

♡ wet&messy, squirting

DONT! (what you will not see from me)

♡ sub!cod characters -- i don't mind if they're a little whiny but full submissive men is not something i'm into!

♡ graphic non-con or incest content -- it doesn't bother me but i dont write it. i will interact with writers who do create this content, however!

♡ military!reader -- i like soft civilian reader, i don't really make the reader someone who is 'badass' and 'cool' i also dont like writing action

♡ heavy angst, sad endings, hurt/no comfort — i don't like to be sad

♡ she/her reader, he/him reader, or amab!reader

♡ heavy degradation; whore, slut, bitch or any names like that -- i will sometimes mention degradation in passing but its not usually anything graphic.

♡ pregnancy, lactation

♡ graves......

#content

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fatuismooches · 1 year

Note

SMOOCHES!! Hii cutie pie!! ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა

I hope you’ve been doing well and enjoying your week! I’ve had this small thought of fragile!reader for a while now so I now give this to you! I hope this doesn’t seem nsfw/suggestive it’s just fluffy fluff ><

Okay okay enough of my rambling! But fragile!reader and Dottore taking a bath together I think would be so so sweet. I think you’ve done something similar to this in the past (I’m not 100% sure so correct me if I’m wrong!) but I think that both of them being so vulnerable and being able to see each others body’s. Dottore most likely was forced into taking a bath with you, as with how fragile you are, he’s scared he would somehow hurt you. But you always reassure him that you love taking baths with him and that it’s something you always look forward to! With how fragile and weak reader is, I would imagine a clone or sometimes Zandik himself, helps them clean up and get all nice. Since your body is probably littered with bandages due to how much Dottore constantly injects you with medicine. But, they’re always so so gentle whenever they gently scrub your body n wash your hair with some lovely scented shampoo <3 (on more than one occasion you’ve definitely accidentally fallen asleep when a clone washes your hair because of how nice and relaxing it feels) but onto the main focus (sorry I went completely off topic there ໒꒰ྀིっ˕ -｡꒱ྀི১ )

But I think when you and Zandik do take baths, you two usually just admire eachother. Or well, you admire Zandik’s body. Since you always get to trace the many scars littered across his arms, hands, and chest. Sometimes if you’re even in a teasing mood, you kiss a few scars, which in return usually leads to Zandik having his ears tinted pink. (Yet he just blames it on the hot water) and I think Zandik would also in turn do the same. Gently caressing your body and soft bites on your neck or cheeks. Or even just admiring how perfect you are in his eyes, even if you may have scars, stretch marks, or things about your body that you don’t particularly like. (He always shoots down you talking negatively about your body because you’re literally perfect!!? Like there’s a reason he chose your and only you!) but this wouldn’t be a boo boo bear fic without angst. I think whenever you two do take baths and you’re just sitting in silence with your back pressed against his chest, he most likely notices how more bandages cover your frail body because of the injections. Or the bruises/cuts that you get whenever you trip or fall because of your weak legs not being able to hold you up. It only encourages him to focus more on your cure than his other experiments or Fatui related duties. And it only makes him to want to go for weeks on end without sleep. But of course, he’ll just have to enjoy these sweet tender moments he gets to enjoy with you. Even if most of the time you’re already asleep, he gently picks you up from the tub and wraps a soft fluffy blanket around you. Eventually changing you and tucking you into bed. Giving you a soft forehead kiss and leaving your bedroom. Only more determined in curing you soon.

Okay this brainrot was all over the place please excuse how horrible it is 😭!! (AND I REALLY HOPE THIS ISNT BREAKING ANY RULES OR MAKES YOU FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE I DONT MEAN TO MAKE IT NSFW/SUGGESTIVE IF IT DOES COME OUT THAT WAY) It’s 11 PM right now but I’ve been feeling a little sad, and writing Dottore brainrots always help in distracting me. I hope you’ve been having a wonderful start to July and having lovely days everyday!! I give you so many chu chus your cheeks become sore hehe!! Okay okay I won’t talk much longer! I hope you enjoy it though!! >< I love u so so much mwa mwa!!! Many kisses and huggies

-from your dear boo boo bear 🎐 anon

૮꒰ྀི∩´ ᵕ `∩꒱ྀིა

🎐 ANON I AM GENTLY KITHING YOUR CHEEKS AS WELL OMFG I LOVE THIS SM😭🥺

CRYING I FEEL SO HAPPY READING THIS… yes yes you two definitely take baths together ;( Vulnerability is something that’s hard for both of you. Hard for you because your illness has made your insecurities about yourself increase. Hard for Dottore for obvious reasons, even now he still finds it hard to lower his guard this much around someone (but he still does, and continues to be confused and surprised by how nice it feels.)

You always have to drag him into the bath with you. In reality he would really like to. But when he sees how fragile you are, inwardly he curses himself for not hurrying up with your cure. Not to mention he is not the best with comforting you especially when you’re such in an open and vulnerable state. So he tends to let you be and trust the clones to take care of you. Luckily you’re smart about it and you always drop the idea of it when the two of you have already spent some time together, so this way he can’t escape you. (You always love the royalty treatment you get when he rolls his eyes and comments at your neediness but picks up you with ease and lets you rest while he sets the bath, making sure the temperature is just right for your body and health.)

It just felt so nice. And not just the soothing feeling of sinking into water and letting your worries float away. To others it may sound like a silly thing to be so excited over. But for you this was some of your highly cherished moments. It was where you felt you could be yourself with Zandik. You wouldn’t be judged about anything. There was nothing that could disturb the two of you. No sounds besides the splashing of the water. All responsibilities and troubles drifted away with the soap suds. It even felt like the concept of time didn’t exist. Only the two of you mattered right now. Not to mention Zandik takes his mask off so you could stare at his pretty face for a long time :) It was always a sight to see. Even though it was scarred he was still the most handsome to you.

Though a lot of the bath is simply you two appreciating each other’s body wholesomely. You’re always the one to initiate it (you can’t help it, sometimes you wonder how you got so lucky) and you always rest your head on his wet chest, gently kissing the scars there, snaking your arms around him and tracing the ones on his back too, while he just looks at you in amusement. When you’re feeling playful you’ll kiss the ones on his neck too and you can feel him to the same too ;( The gentle graze of his pointy teeth is strangely pleasant and he knows it. (Once during the Akademiya you were curious as to how sharp his sharky teeth were, and you asked him to bite you with force. You needed to put a bandage on it after that, and he had the audacity to be surprised at his own strength.) You always take the chance to wash his fluffy hair. You don’t know how he gets it so nice with so minimal effort. Turns out even he doesn’t know. But he looks quite cute when his hair is completely damp and it’s no longer bouncy, sticking to his face.

Of course you are the epitome of beauty for Zandik. No other being, human or not, comes close to you. This is extremely high praise from him considering he doesn’t see beauty or perfection in anything else. He doesn’t care about others in the slightest. He only sees you, and how you embody those traits. If you ever try to hide your body from him, he’ll just trap you in his arms so you can’t run away. And just tell you straight up not to be ridiculous. That since your days in the Akademiya he’s only had eyes for you. That every single part of you is alluring and makes him want more. He doesn’t mean to hurt you with his tone or anything. But he’s very serious when he says stuff like that. If it were possible he’d give you his eyes so you can see how he sees you (I mean it quite literally)

Even though you’re the one dragging him into this you always fall asleep first on his chest. And it’s this time when he fully gets to take notes of your body. Once again he wishes that you didn’t need to go through this. He longs for the day he holds the cure in his hand. When he gets to see you do everything you used to with ease. Maybe get a bruise from running so fast without a care in the world this time instead. Unfortunately you’re not awake to distract him from these thoughts. He takes a look at your face, it’s tired but you’re still smiling. And now he is a bit too, because you’ll always be by his side regardless. He knows you probably wish that he’d cuddle with you right now. But for your sake, he needs to press on.

As for the clones, they have created a schedule between themselves on who helps you clean up on which day. I feel like they exchange notes on which soaps and body washes and scents you like the best - they actually made it themselves, tailored to your likes and body and in case you have sensitive skin. Also, they are blowing the budget on the fluffiest soft towels for you! (Don’t let Pantalone know) I imagine they are always willing to help you since even the simplest tasks can feel exhausting and challenging for you sometimes. If you’re in the mood, sometimes you’ll be really talkative, asking them about lots of things. Or sometimes you’ll let them do all the talking and just listen happily. Or sometimes it’s just silence but comfortable. Either way, it feels very very soft and nice especially when they’re working the soap into your body and scalp (honestly it feels like a massage, depending on which clone you’re with, the older ones are more methodical and slow with it.)

I honestly can't remember writing something like this (if I have it's just been way too long 😭) BUT OMG I LOVED IT SM IT WAS LITERALLY AMAZING SHUSH. And I'm so sorry you're feeling sad :( I'm sending lots of hugs and kithes your way, Dottore is too <3 I hope you have lots of good days too!! Ily more!! Lots of smooches for you!! 💖💕💕💖

#smooches talks #🎐 anon #fragile reader <3 #dottore love notes <3 #U DONT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH I LOVE THIS #I LOVE LOVE FLUFFY BATH TIMES 😭😭💖

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sanjipussyindulgence · 2 months

Text

okay now that ive had time to properly stew over nayuta's death... i realized i kind of legitimately hate it from a narrative perspective. im still enjoying part 2 and everything (more than i enjoyed the majority of part 1 tbh. it only really clicked for me with the ending) but with nayuta gone? part 1 has in, retrospect, become meaningless.

the creation of nayuta's character was the conclusion to that entire story line. alongside its message that even if the world sucks, there's still always going to be love in it - and that love is the only way to break the cycle of abuse. what made me enjoy chainsaw man sm is how, despite the constant whump and bloodshed, that message was still at the core. it gave all of denji's suffering a point.

i dont enjoy many other grimdark stories because they're usually suffering for the pure sake of suffering. that isn't interesting to me personally. if a plot is just characters going through constant hell, front to back, without any silver linings... then i dont care. why should i? im basically watching someone smash a bunch of action figures with a hammer. i think tragedy carries more weight if it amounts to something in the end. it doesn't have to be anything great, or even a happy ending, but just SOMETHING to add payoff to it all. if a character starts at rock-bottom, stays at rock-bottom throughout the plot, and ends at rock-bottom, then how is that not repetitive? i thought chainsaw man shared that opinion with me.

but if nayuta was always gonna get killed off for more denji angst... then why bother writing that story at all? it's not like part 1 is being carried on in other ways. kishibe and kobeni haven't made any appearances. aki + power have only been mentioned once or twice... so what was the point of any of them? part 1 isn't impacting the larger story at all now. you probably don't even need to read it to understand what's happening in part 2!

if i gave someone a brief summary that amounted to 'denji used to be a poor homeless kid with a pet devil but then he fused with that devil and became a devil hunter. he worked with some other devil hunters but they all died. his devil hunter boss was actually a devil the whole time and was evil so he killed her and then she got reincarnated as a kid he's taking care of now' you'd be able to skip the entirety of it.

that sucks!! that's not a good sign for how your story is set-up!!! and now im wondering if the same will happen for part 2!!!!

i was always kind of cautious going into part 2. on one hand, i love chainsaw man and getting to read more of it is great. on the other hand, part 1 had such a perfectly bittersweet ending. seriously 10/10. i consider it one of the best endings to any series ever. it affected me sm and i wouldn't change a thing about it.

but at this point, i don't know if ill feel the same about however part 2 wraps up - or how the series in general will wrap up. ig thats the problem with writing something the beginning of a story so well. you risk falling short as time goes on, instead of ending on a high note.

idk though i do trust fujimoto to cook so let's see what happens.

#chainsaw man #csm spoilers #chainsaw man part 2 #chainsaw man critical #nayuta #csm nayuta #csm denji #chainsaw man 170 #chainsaw man 171 #this is just a personal opinion 100% btw #im not saying csm isnt well written #it is objectively a very very well put together tragedy #and ik other people enjoy that genre #but in terms of how much im enjoying it?#i felt that sims -2 sign pop over my head while reading 170

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ellecdc · 7 months

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every single remus version you have written so far is about to catch these hands cause wtf.

I MEAN COME ON JUST FUCKING BE HAPPY ITS NOT THAT HARD??

anyways loved the new chap and i love rem being a stupid fucken doofus AND SIRIUS PUTTING HIM IN HIS PLACE YES BABY

also i feel as though amelia is gonna be a big fucking problem for my whim baby. i swear if she hurts her im going to riot. pitch forks and torches.

i want more sirius putting people in their places (shit is hot 🤭🤭) hoping it’s amelia next🫣

(i do feel a little bad though, it’s either she’s going to be a problem or she’s going to be extremely hurt AND I DONT LIKE SEEING GIRLS HURT NO NO)

anyways i think the reason why your stories work so well is because you mesh ALL the characters into the story, it’s never just r and said character ITS A WHOLE PRODUCTION AND A HALF👏👏

ohhh i can’t wait for the angst between james, sirius, and rem and then heart wrenching angst between rem and my whimsical baby😮‍💨😮‍💨

(also a little note i saw u post abt the drink snob: if you are willing to finish the story (which is fully up to you, no one can force you to do anything) i think you can start it off with r finally starting work in the restaurant! i think the interview process with rem’s parents would be so cute, while she learns stuff abt him cuz his mom is adorable and won’t stop talking abt her kids (all of them) maybe she gets a little peak -fully accidental- abt what it is rem and the little gang is actually doing. just a few ideas for you lovely, it’s all up to you and what you feel comfortable in doing! 🫶💗)

YES YES YES THERE YOU ARE - everytime I post a new chapter/piece I literally sit at the computer like:

….waiting to see what frostooo has to say 💃🏻

I know rem is such a dumb dumb it was getting hard to write cuz he was pissing me off so much (even tho it’s my own damn fault??)

I was like, okay, someone’s gotta humble this man, and who better than my fellow November Scorpio??????

I think someone needs to look at Amelia and be like “………babes…..why u letting this mans treat you like this????………….be better” like which friends of hers are letting her hopelessly pine over this dumpster fire of a man rn???? Bad friends, she needs new friends.

Also, I’m the kind of person who like, the thing I’m most proud of/what I brag about to people is my relationships. Like my relationship with my friends I’ve known since I was 4, being an aunt & godmama like these things are the coolest thing about me so I wouldn’t be who I am without my friends AND THATS HOW OUR BABIES ARE?!?!? Sirius is who he is cuz of his friends, and James, and Remus etc etc - they are integral to the story because they’re integral to the characters!!!

I’m going to mood board about drink snob - usually I have an idea of how I want a story to end before I write it (I knew the ending of CBBH and of AMWAP before I knew what happened in the middle), so it feels weird to write without a plan. (Omg, a plan, I sound like Remus)

Okay bye love you drink lots of water today 🫶

#ask elle #elle chats #remus is a man with a plan #marauders era #marauders au #marauders fanfiction

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bucketspammer4life · 1 year

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hondo & sandman angst and fluff hcs!!

request by @wierdlesbian!!!

hcs below the cut!!

Fluff

they often do paralel play (basically doing different things around each other) a whole lot

hondo knows how to crochet (im not spelling that right 99%) and makes cute little plushies whenever hes sad

they communicate by silly drawings, whenever sandman is mad at him for something silly (i.e not cleaning up the shower after using it, forgetting the milk outside the fridge) he'll doodle his chibi-self with a pissed off face

hondo usually makes tea for sandman after workouts, in return sandman makes him some smoothies since hondo doesnt eat enough fruit

sandman & hondo cant exercise together due to them constantly making jokes around each other and leaving themselves out of breath by trying to exercise & make jokes at the same time

Hondo will buy sweets everytime he goes to the store because he knows sandman has a sweet tooth and nothing is worse than a sweet tooth left without sugar

Angst

Since both of them cant really express affection & are also direct people they have outright asked each other "are you forcing yourself to be happy around me?" And "do you not love me?" multiple times

both of their parents dont approve their relationship and since theyre family oriented people that hurts them a whole lot, all they wanted was to have their family be glad they found someone they love

both of them cant apologize to save their lives & theyre not willing to use the fruit bowl apology so they end up writing apology notes to each other that have sentences like "i understand if you wanna break up with me." And "its okay if you dont wanna be with me anymore."

Both of them isolate themselves when theyre angry & sad, but they still see each other in the house so they just make really sad eye contact with both of their faces red from crying & eyes puffy from all that, especially after tough arguments

After bad arguments they cant bear to see each other, they just break into tears

#punch out #headcanon #punch out wii #punch out headcanons #piston hondo #mr sandman #angst is a guilty pleasure for me. traumatize the scrunklies <3 #and so is fluff

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devondespresso · 10 months

Text

20 Questions for Fic Writers

tagged by @museumgiftshoperaser

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

technically 2, but its a sfw and nsfw version of the same fic fhajklfjdalfjk

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

...6,357. i promise i write.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

just stranger things so far, but i have seriously thought about writing about Fender's gender from Robots (2005) and I promised my friend a Shark Tale fic for their birthday fjalhfdjkalfdj

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Never Again

Never Again (sfw)

fascinating statistics arent they

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

never gotten comments on ao3, i do reply to what i get on tumblr tho because it literally makes my day

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

(including my unposted work) Never Again, tho i think its more bittersweet than unrelenting angst

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

tho its technically not finished, We'll Be Alright (Steve Henderson AU) has a very happy ending

8. Do you get hate on fics?

no, thank god

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

im gonna say no? despite writing something spicy at the beginning of Never Again it was not a good time (for me or Nancy)

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

haven't yet, and while i wont write them off entirely itd have to have really strong potential for me to want to do it

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

nope

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no, and i dont know how well id go. on the one hand im usually good at group stuff but im also an annoying perfectionist with my writing

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

platonically stobin 100%. i dont get nearly as attatched to the romantic ones so i kinda just bounce around the fandom. Really love a lot of the steve harrington rairpairs floating around, plus robin and vickie

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I dont realllly have a writing wip i know i wont finish cause i've just been posting those vague ideas instead of actually writing them becuase i know i wont. My only active wip is the steve henderson au and im hoping praying to god that i dont suddenly loose passion for it

16. What are your writing strengths?

dialogue probably, coming up with how different characters are saying things, what theyre saying, what they mean, all the little differences in their voices, I love it. that and having characters interact with the environment

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

overthinking and underthinking, stopping myself from making something happen or a character do something because theres this pull in my chest telling me its wrong. even just standard selfishness or saying something without the express intent of making sure it wont hurt someones feelings. i also start sentences with verbs djaldjdjaf

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

makes sense if characters are speaking multiple languages i guess. depends on pov and how limited it is to the pov character. like if the pov character doesnt speak spanish it'd be better to write "and they said something in spanish they didnt understand" instead of writing the spanish out assuming the audience doesnt know it either

19. First fandom you wrote for?

stranger things

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

definitely my steve henderson au. i wish it was shared already but at the same time i've editied and changed so much im glad i havnt officially yet. its helped me work through a lot and has even caused noticable improvement in my relationship with my family even if they dont know it exists. i cant promise itll be fully posted soon, but i am so exited for when i do

tagging @stobinesque @marvel-ous-m @eriquin @itsthestrangestthings @findafight @fag4dykestobin (no pressure ofc 💕)

#20 questions #tag game

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yandere-monoma · 1 year

Text

WHOOO KYM 2 COMMENTARY while i stall on working on kym 7

lots to discuss about a chapter literally called 'the exposition' hjgkfsg. if you didnt know, the way ao3 multichap updates works is that you dont necessarily have to title a oneshot chapter but the second you update it, you really get shown the option to title your chapters. so it didnt actually occur to me that i needed names for each one until chapter 2. i believe originally i was going to use a similar system as kyd where every chapter title was a command a la homestuck. however, i wasn't really utilizing the commands in the same way, i didn't really end the previous chapter with one and the plan for the next chapter... technically involves a command but not one i wanted to spoil via the chapter title.

the current naming system came into existence probably 3/4s of the way or more into writing this chapter, once i made the realization that the fic was, in fact, going to be at least five chapters. at this point in time, the plan was the following: the introduction, the exposition, the climax, the ending, the epilogue. this changed even more as time went on and more chapter ideas rudely crammed themselves into my brain, though it helped the structure a lot, because giving me time to fill out the space between exposition and climax made my brain happy HJSKFG

so, moving on, the fun part about chap 2 is that it really establishes the 'narration' as its own living function, something that is vaguely independent of the story rather than just a tool to present the story with, that both voices the author's and the character's thoughts depending on who is grabbing for control. this isn't an aspect i planned when outlining the fic but it's definitely influenced by 1) how much fun i had reading the epilogues and subsequent epilogue flavored fics 2) my desire to find some way to one-up the first chapter despite the topic matter not being nearly as extreme 3) the impulse to add in another experimental element to the story, especially now that the more abstract and poetic style of the first chapter was being removed

it's also incredibly fun to play with, because every time i struggled with describing something or wondered how i could transition from one point to the other, i realized - oh! i can just make the narrator state that very thing. don't know how i'm gonna build up from the end of chap 1 to the narrative goal of chap 2 (rose's mkultra moment)??? let's just get that all out in the open, then! problem SOLVED

it ended up being a hugely fun choice that allowed me to inject some humor into what's otherwise just a big ole pile o' unrelenting angst. it also helped me take myself less seriously, which lent me even more creative freedom than usual, like. GOD. it really helped turn this piece into something so rewarding, it overwhelms me. goddamnit homestuck why do you have to be so good

i just rewatched butterfly effect recently, god. back to the future i've never seen though. time references haha get it cuz his aspect is still time-

speaking of time, this chapter was the first attempt to really try and describe a zeta kid's classpect without coming out and stating it. there's a few interpretations of different phenomena's in homestuck that point out the implication of classpect powers being active before reaching god tier, or even before entering the game (though, usually in a way that is incredibly weak, premature and subtle enough to be missed by the user). one of the strongest examples that i based this chapter on was something the epilogues described: the idea that rose's obsessive writing as a child was based on her light powers feeding her vague visions of her future character arcs and plotlines. i really loved that and wanted a similar sort of plight for dave. i'll go off about what his specific title is at the end of this chapter but it's really fun poking at it now and then

the multiple narrators? seriously??? bit was me realizing i had to add a Multiple Narrators tag on ao3 after this. at this point of writing, i had no idea if i would be visiting anyone else's pov besides dave's, though.

attempt at homestuckian humor GO

™️ jokes are so funny to me for no reason

wink wink hint hint this is one of dave's powers at work, actually!! so, dave egbert actually has a perfect memory. like, there is not a single thing he's ever forgotten in his life, if he's experienced it, he can recollect that knowledge. this power also extends to the imaginary, the subconscious, and the supernatural, ie: in the event that dave experiences any visions of the future, he will retain that information. likewise, he has memories of every dream and nightmare he's ever had. which is fun because considering he's a dersite and also a time player and also dave, he has a lot of them HAHA. more on that later

The two of you had hit it off instantly despite this, like you had known each other your entire lives, like any and every other relationship that had come before it had merely been a warm-up for the monumental connection that would spark instantly between you both. ... You’re pretty convinced she’s your soulmate. If not that, you’re at least assured by the fact that you’re absolutely head over heels in love with her.

sentences i had so much fun writing knowing how badly it's going to mess dave up to learn that they're actually related HA HA

Especially at the start, Rose was mysterious and she was hilarious and she was overwhelming, the brightest thing you’ve ever had the fortune of witnessing.

get it because she's a hero of light get it she's the light of his life because shes a hero of light get it get it she's mysterious because her class mimics its opposite at the beginning of the story so everything about her pre-canon arc clings to void but she!! is bright! like light haha get i- 💥

see, reading sentences like this means i HAVE to at least write enough of their session to let dave both die and kill for his rose, like

also i need to write her killing and dying for him. well. killing for him. well.

killing.

perhaps just killing him. HAHAHA.

it is very fun to think about this because rose honestly just. does not talk about her relationship with dave much outside of mentioning that they're together. her narrative is so focused on the things that she wants the audience to focus on, so this was such a fun chapter to reveal the things she decided isn't important enough to ever let us in on.

like, she is so adamant that bro is the only important person in her life and the only person she loves, but she deeply cares about dave. she feels the same way, that they're connected in this way she can't pinpoint or name. and claiming him is exactly the right way to put it, because i don't think she knows how to acknowledge those emotions in herself, but she knows that she needs him with her always and wants him entrapped in a way where he can't get away from her.

i think rose is just incredibly attracted to what dave represents: safety, normalcy, the mundane, a reprieve from pain, but there are things about him that she just inherently gets. he's an outsider despite how much he attempts to fit in and i think there's something about that she relates to but also wants so badly to destroy and keep for herself.

also, this is a thing that belongs more in hcs than in kym specifically, especially because i imagine this taking place way earlier in their relationship, but bro absolutely knows about her relationship with dave. it isn't a secret. it's a thing that amuses him greatly. i actually imagine she shares a lot of details about him to bro, like allowing him this voyeuristic entertainment because dave isn't a threat to him, not really, and she shares every single one of her belongings with him.

in a perfectly pornographic world the two of them would spitroast the fuck out of him but this is a partially pornographic world that involves a meaningful plotline or whatever 🙄 smh

siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh

this part was incredibly hard to write. not because it was difficult or emotionally taxing but because i reached this unfortunate impasse i find myself at every now and then while writing a lot of darkfic where i struggle with... it's not exactly the impulse to project, necessarily, more just.... feeling forced through into inevitability of it? or maybe it's the reluctance to use personal experiences vs the knowledge that doing it can benefit your writing (but also can hamper it).

like, very hard to write about a self-destructive teenager with violent tendencies without being reminded of the time when you were a self-destructive teenager with violent tendencies.

that reluctance is born from a rant i'm definitely not gonna get into unprompted but i'll just say that it definitely complicated things HAHAHA. i've definitely gone through a 'i'm going through a psychotic break and i'm going to ramble out 7835963463 crazy things into this dm window because the person on the other side said i could' phase. i've definitely just. been insane and vomited so many words out and ngl for a second there in the final draft when i was feeling too lazy to get into Stream Of Consciousness mode i was very tempted to dig up an old vent post and copypaste those thoughts in for rose but ultimately i thought that was disingenuous and a betrayal of her character SO

a fun but unexpected surprise was rose sounding far more like herself during her drugged moments of honesty. it's especially fun because even in the future when she doesn't have access to any sort of drugs or contact with bro anymore, i don't think she'll sound this much like rose lalonde either. it's like in her desperate search to find more of her brother, she's really just found a core part of herself that she doesn't have access to in this universe

'Is there a mechanical soul within me?' there is and his name is hal hi hal

it is actually incredibly fun playing with typing quirk punctuation. it's actually a style i utilized a lot in chatroom roleplay groups yeaaaaaaaaaars after homestuck ended, very much inspired by tumblr ventblogging typing styles, crytyping and all that. the idea that someone's mental state can and should be reflected in their typing style, which is something you really only see in canon in a character like gamzee (i cant remember if other trolls drop the quirk in times of duress in canon??? i think karkat drops his as a joke about volume sometimes but that's it). i don't even know if it even really comes across as blatantly as it feels when i write it, but it's so fun to see the consistencies in a way a character types slowly but surely fall apart as they grow unstable

so the way this is designed, it's as if rose had a moment of finally being in touch with the core of herself, with what ultimately makes her rose (complete with proper punctuation), before slowly but surely lapsing back into ro-stri as she loses her punctuation piece by piece, and then ultimately devolving even more as she abandons her capitalization to type in a way that's reminiscent of dave but, more importantly, bro's typing quirk

'I think there are lives inside me/the life inside me is his' is so funny to look at in hindsight. this chapter was halfway finished before the pregnancy plot had even come into being, and this was only ever supposed to be a reference to the identity blurring she's experiencing, and this half-truth, half-delusion about being able to sense everything lil cal has injected into her and her brother. it is so STRANGE to reread it now knowing that it's become foreshadowing to her pregnancy, especially with that next sentiment following it:

'Sometimes I wish it was yours'. again, that idea of being soulmates, being connected with someone permanently. and, again, that idea of codependency, and rose being unable to express or understand love without that need to merge herself with the object of her affection. and again this was befORE the pregnancy plot was a thing so now every time i read this line i sit here hoping people dont interpret it as rose wanting dave's baby HGJFKGSGSG i swear im not into breeding i sWEAR

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭😭😭😭

DAVE IS SO CUTE I ALWAYS DIE REREADING THAT PART HE'S SO CUUUTE

also i struggle so SO much writing comfort scenes especially dialogue meant to comfort someone but this came out so easily. perhaps because it's a futile attempt and i didn't have to worry about the recipient of that comfort actually feeling soothed...? hmmm!

i have nothing to add to the romantic cannibalism confession besides :3c

i don't actually reread this chapter all that often anymore so finding this paragraph was lovely damn shoutout to this sentence that made me choke on my water as i was reading it cuz i was so distracted by how much i didnt remember writing this that i forgot to swallow and my drink just slid down into my lugnshjskdfg

then it is a series of letters in a language you wonder if she’s made up, that is somehow so cohesive in its chaos that you start to doubt even that.

more horrorterror references as if the literal last paragraph wasn't enough HAHA

a very fun part of designing and outlining the killswitch au is deciding who gets what plotline. for example, does rose strider get to go grimdark because she's rose? or does jade lalonde get to go grimdark because she's the lalonde with library access to the grimoire? unlike the characterization formula, there isn't an easy answer to this one. i'm mostly just going with what's more fun narratively and what makes a better and more cohesive storyline for the verse.

either way, though, ro-stri still has a connection with the horrorterrors, simply because she's a dersite and because i love a character that is so utterly doomed that every evil force on the face of the planet wants to take a turn on them. what's better than this... getting psychologically gangbanged by every demon in existence...

DID YOU KNOW I AM SO VERY FOND OF DAVE EGBERT AND HIS LOVELY PAPA WHO LOVES HIM SO MUCH

i am also so very fond of a dave egbert who cries alone in front of his computer cuz his girlfriend makes him so very sad every night like poor baby does Not Sleep and its so cute gjkgs

'its just prose' annoys the shit out of me to see because i wrote a similar line in a published piece of writing a couple of years ago so i can't reread this without being reminded of That hgjfkg

i will never write a strider rap i have the highest respect for any author who can but it'll never be me

their dynamic kills me HJKGFGKGS peak toxic romance right here god i wish i could write even more of it... i need to write more daverose so fucking bad....

a fun line because 1) i rly enjoy dave's half-forced half-genuine emotional voyeurism it's just a rly interesting aspect of his personality to write and 2) it's fun to have a moment with dave e's specific brand of humor since it's not as long-winded as a strider's would be

i rly forgot so much of this chapter HGFKGSGS oh dave... i love you... i love writing you so much...

stream-of-consciousness style writing is really fun like you get taken to so many unexpected places in the process. generally when i go SoC style i tend to have a few goals i want to land and this image, dave watching over rose in derse, was one of the big ones

ALSO THE IRONY OF DAVE CALLING HIMSELF HER PRINCE WHEN SHE IS ACTUALLY THE PRINCE OF THE SESSION HEHEHEHEHE

the lil cal staring contest is also another big one. it's just such a fun image to allude to like goddamnit i wish i could draw. it feels like an image that i can't even really describe properly what i want it to mean because it explains itself and there's not much minutia to pry free, it's just. them. rose inexplicably and perpetually being drowned in this cancerous evil at a rate that not even dave strider got to experience.

lmfao shout out to me explaining his memory power earlier forgetting that i explain it in the chapter HJSKFG

oh well NOW I GET TO ACTUALLY DISCUSS HIS CLASSPECT

so dave egbert issssss....

🥁 [drumroll] 🥁

the MAGE OF TIME!!!!

and changing classpects actually did something incredibly interesting to the story. killswitch never would have worked as a simple homestuck rewrite, because i dont think swapping the guardians is something that can ever be simple. so it didnt make sense to keep their classpects exactly the same, because they wouldn't have the same personalities or the same backgrounds to craft those personalities, or the same issues that were born of their uniquely shitty backgrounds. it also didnt feel as easy as making rose a knight of light and dave an heir of time, etc etc. like, while rose is not insecure in the classic way that knights should be (it can be argued that the 'i am my brother' facade can count towards knighthood... but her role in the story and what it will turn into once she joins the game definitely brands her a prince through and through)

through researching for killswitch i ended up coming to this conclusion about sburb and how i approach classpect and hs narratives in general:

and because of that, it was super easy to reassign everyone based on what they've been turned into through the switch in their roles.

it also made for another easy characterization formula: their aspect represents their 'nature' while their class represents their 'nurture'. so all the zeta kids still belong to the same aspect while their class changes rapidly, though how close or how far it is from their original class really depends on their character

anyway, mage of time is an incredibly fun role that actually breaks the rewrite narrative almost more than rose's classpect does. as the mage of time, dave actually steals the cryptic psychic role from jade and john harley (though, i do have thoughts on that matter, because there is still going to be a benefit for them from having access to prospit, and that plotline will still be involved in some capacity... probably).

and it's a very fun, partially accidental discovery within the au that the zeta kids are all... just a tad more prepared to enter sburb than their predecessors. rose is completely aware of the fact that she's training for something specific and dave... dave knows that the game is coming. he doesn't know the specifics, he doesn't know that it's sburb specifically that will bring them all together, but he knows there's an it, he knows the day he'll meet all his friends in person will be a day for the history books, and he knows that rose is in danger and that he'll be able to help her in a way no one else can.

some mage of time thoughts, many of which inspired and/or describe dave egbert's storyline:

source

the above was probably one of the first interpretations i read and really what solidified him as a mage, my initial thoughts to his classpect and how it interacts with rose's was the following:

and it's just so fun GOD rly hope i get to write in his perspective more in the future

haha yeah if we ever get to it yEAH if i ever get off my ass and actually finish writing this wholeass au which i nEVER WILL CUZ I DONT WANNA WRITE 500K WORDS GODDDD IM NEVER WRITING A HOMESTUCK AU AGAAAAIINNNN

#fic: kill your masters #director's commentary #meta #verse: killswitch #rose strider #dave egbert

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