#i feel excited!!! for myself!!!!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tea-stained · 1 year

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How fucked am I if I'm actually happy to feel horrible? It feels so refreshing after having every emotion numbed down. I love this feeling of "today felt nice, something unthinkably bad will happen soon", and this overwhelming feeling of helplessness. I love being able to name them!!!

I'm used to this feeling of impending doom to the point where I just sort of accept it, but today it felt different. So powerful. Made my heart go faster. Made me feel so helpless. Made me feel alive!

And I did not even need meds to feel it!

Am I healing? Am I finally healing?

It's such a relief, to feel this way again.

I'm glad. I'm happy. I feel something I can name. I feel so many things I can name. Today was so... Productive! Even though I have not created anything, other than pleasant memories!

I thought it would be a disaster. I thought I've lost myself even further today. But no.

I'm coming back.

Wait for me, my younger self.

I will pull you back up.

We will stand here, soon, arm by arm, side by side.

We will be one again.

Today, I have found you.

But one day, together, we will reach the me.

#slowly regaining my personality #i feel excited!!! for myself!!!!!#i'm so tired of not having a single thought #of living like an empty shell #a vessel that used to be inhabited by an actual person #i used to enjoy acting but my brain is not really that capable of understanding other people and social cues so my acting abilities sorta #sorta died somewhere along the way? i remember the thoughts circling my consciousness so fast i was unable to catch a single one #which resulted in me canceling them all out in a way because there were just too many #did not improve on that one yet but i believe actually being able to tell how i feel aside from “good” or “bad” is a big-ass step #might be just an one-off and probably is but being idiotically optimistic can be uplifting sometimes eheheh

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keferon · 3 months

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…..SO. AHAHAHAHAH. I finished reading Mistakes on mistakes until (technically I finished chapter 68 which is the last one currently~)

What a ride OH MY fuckINg god

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saltmalkin · 1 year

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cat spirit

#watercolor #illustration #artists on tumblr #cat #this one was a struggle yall #but i'm feeling myself slowly get better at using watercolors #which is really exciting I've loved the medium a lot since I was a kid ;w;

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wardingshout · 10 months

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instead of brain there is Link's Awakening

#tloz #link's awakening #link #my art #I promise I have real proper fanart for this game I promise I will finish it eventually and I'm so excited sdfhku (hyping myself up)#it's been a while since my motivation for drawing has been this consumed by the feeling of wanting to show my love for a media #and it gets a bit overwhelming but I can still mess around with small stuff in the meantime !!#I use tegaki very sporadically but I still think everyone should come hang out on there wink wink

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rameiixo · 9 months

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xiaolumi resurrected from my heart for the new year!!

#genshin impact #genshin impact fanart #xiaolumi #xiaolumi fanart #lumine fanart #xiao fanart #rameiixo #i havent stopped thinking about them. like ever #i feel like i could go on rambles forever about how thoroughly special they feel to me #aside from… xiao being my love……#but thats for another day #i have all these ideas and i concept them #but i always think i cant do those ideas justice ? like what kind of creative redundancy is that #i got so frustrated with myself that i do not care anymore i want to make things i love #excited to see where i end up a year from now!

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speakofcompersion · 6 days

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cutie moments during Ephemeral Gaze soundcheck 😌💘 [240901 WANT / SITA]

#shinee #taemin #lee taemin #shine taemin #ephemeral gaze #sexy in the air #want #dailyshinee #kpopccc #ksoloists #smsource #kpopstages #speakofgifs #wow i haven't giffed in a while i almost forgot how heh~#not gonna lie.. it's been stressing me out. i can't keep up idk how yall gif so quickly :')) but cutie taemin moments are always fun #gotta make something for key's comback or i'll feel like i betrayed him <33 i am SOOOO excited. the concept/album looks and sounds amazing #and the brief sneak-peek i let myself have of his performance of pleasure shop looked so fun! I'm glad he's going party bop. does them well

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skrs-cats · 7 months

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wanted to draw somethin like this for a long time now

Prev || Next

#warrior cats #art #lionblaze #leafpool #tried to take a crack at the ID myself but if anyone has any criticisms for that feel free to send me a message!#u can criticize the comic itself too but i WILL cry slash half joking half serious #next page is gonna be my favorite i think #it wont feature something badass or anything im just excited to puke out the brain vomit thats been rolling around in my brain for like eve

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fluentisonus · 1 year

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roman theatre in orange, france

three stories tall & considered the best-preserved roman theatre in all of europe

#HELLO this was cool as hell. except not literally bc I was out in full sun in 40° heat to take these photos #<- might have made myself a little ill feeling while I was at it but it was worth it #thoughts #tagamemnon #this was very exciting bc I studied this theatre in university years ago & I've been wanting to go for a v long time #I have more photos but I have to wait til i get home to sort through them

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groenendaze · 8 months

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these make me feel emotions i dont quite understand

#i uh. emailed a single breeder tonight #part of me feels like its too soon after pando but also there was a reason i got pando when i did #and that is because it is a good time in my life to have a puppy especially with my current dog's ages.....#nettle turns 6 this year #and waitlists are sometimes over 2 years long #i just. Eugh #both excited & nerve-racking #finch #ideally i am putting myself on a list and will not get a puppy until nettle is running full lanes in flyball #among other things #but those things are more personal goals and less Dog Goals

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lemongogo · 1 year

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sry i dont know what 2 draw anymore T_T . elendira portrait #999

#trigun #trigun maximum #elendira #elendira the crimsonnail #my art #im sure u can see it but ive been so uninspired w art lately T_T #ive tried to remedy it by just looking and observing. breaking down other works that i want 2 take direction from #but i tjknk its like . just jamming ME UPPP #and now im tjinking Too much ab it and psyching myself out #help me sorry i blow up the tags on every drawing i post ab my art struggles😭😭#its like im whispering in here thouggh. just talking 2 myself and no one has 2 know except the ppl dealing w the same feelings #HAJAHA #anyways. i drew this just to say i finally drew smth agajn and im just going to be ok w it #like sure its not exciting but i like the colors and that shld be enough . OK !!!!#smth smth saw a post that talked ab how u get too in ur Head about this and then u dont share stuff and it becomes cyclical #and youll never get anywhere unless u just throw ur hands in the air and let it Be .#creating 4 the sake of creating . love and joy in sharing what we made and what we like #YAAAY #and bc i love elendira so much.. my go to girlie 4 art block #i need to draw her in fight scenes . i need 2 make art of her like sweaty and bloody yah . clenching my fist #maybe a livio fight scene bc i love it so much T_T

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floweroflaurelin · 2 years

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🎶 The Crown…

Pix now wears the Crown… 🎶

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The moment of recognition when that ancient and powerful thing deep in the catacombs… discovers the Crown.

#empires smp #pixlriffs #empires smp fanart #pixlriffs fanart #empires fanart #empires pixlriffs #empiresblr #floweroflaurelin art #mcyt fanart #mcyt #mcytblr #gif #animated #aha! by making that post about not having time to make fanart I tricked you all into not expecting any #thus freeing myself from the pressure of feeling like I have to get fanart done for major story beats #and allowing me to have the motivation to procrastinate my thesis and make stuff for fun instead!#anyway this is the same crown design I did AGES ago but it’s all tarnished now #I’m so excited to have it back the way everyone covets it is so good #I mean THEE historian sees it and instead of preserving it he puts it on his head and comments on how well it fits??#he’s never had any interest in telling people what to do and then declares himself king and threatens those who disobey with ‘punishment’??#everyone who sees it is driven to do anything in their power to get it for themselves?#what does the Crown want. what does it get out of this. it is so very much a cursed object and I love it

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mokadevs · 10 months

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happy fate extra/ccc english patch release !!

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skinandscales-if · 4 months

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Skin & Scales: Chapter Two is NOW AVAILABLE

Thank you everyone again for your patience for this chapter’s release, I hope the content proves worth the wait! Please enjoy and a reminder that I follow the tag #S&S IF and you can always tag me personally if you have any thoughts to share!

PLAY HERE

In this chapter:

- Meet the last 2 ROs!

- Continue your investigation

- Take to the sky!

- Play a round of basketball

- Disassociate at a sandwich shop

- And more!

Content Warnings for this chapter:

- Depictions of violence

- Depictions of anxiety

- Depictions of panic attacks