#i feel like letting go of a beloved part of your life that youve kind of outgrown and no matter how much you wish it could be like before | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dirtylittlefairytales · 27 days

Text

Don't play with fire | - Part 1 - |

Authors Note: Hey. This is my first try ever writing in English, since it's not my first language. I read it over several times, hopefully to correct all mistakes. Also this is the first try of fanfiction since 2016. Sooo I appreciate feedback and let me know what you think.. Please be kind. 🙏🥹

Originally I wanted to write a short backstory, but I think it’s just going to be multiple parts if you want to read it. So see this as a kind of introduction. In further chapters I wanted to try myself to write my smut fantasies out. I'm also going to upload this later to Ao3 under the username Lorily96.

-> Writing in 'italic' is supposed to be the your thoughts

Warnings: Describing of a Panic attack, Age Gap (Legal)

Word count: 8k

Tagging: @a-movie-that-youve-never-seen, @amethystblackkchaos, @hereforthehitsbaby

Some people say life is a cruel joke. Unexpected twists and pain waiting around every corner. Some people say the glass is never empty and everything happens for a reason. You can learn from anything. Everyone you meet is either there for a reason, for a season or... for ever. However the world is not black and white, sometimes there is no reason at all. You know how you sometimes laugh when something bad happens to a stranger or friend. Like their ice cream falling to the ground, seeing a cop writing a ticket for somebody else. I think ‘Life’ itself is bored just like us. That's why sometimes you feel like it’s only getting worse. Doesn’t matter what you do, there is no luck to be found. That's exactly how you felt that day. Just strings of bad luck and to this day you still question yourself. Why? Why didn’t you say something? Why did you do it? Why didn’t you walk away? How did all of this happen in the first place? The events of that day living rent-free in your head, keeping you up at night.

~ Sometimes Life has a dark and twisted humor. ~

All those overprotective dads, who only want the best for their daughter. Your dad was one of them. He always told you: "Be wary of strangers", "Never tell someone your name if you feel something is off", “Go with your gut feeling” and "don't go near the car of a stranger". Seriously, he had good points.

Unfortunately, he didn’t tell you what to do, when you suspect someone is a serial killer. Maybe running or keeping your nose out of the situation would have been a great option. Well, since daddy had been out of the picture since you were 12, maybe he would have some kind of advice for that. Your mom had found out he was cheating, and after the divorce, he cared more about his new girlfriend and son than you. Why care about the daughter you raised for 12 years, your beloved wife, when you can just throw it away and play happy family with the next woman you find.

At times, you wonder if that's the reason you had some kind of daddy issues. Perhaps you liked older men like him because of that. Even today, his face still haunts and excites you at the same time. Remembering how drawn you were to him. He was so charming and devilishly handsome. You felt sick and appalled at yourself for feeling this way. Everything he did, seemed to play into his hands. Who would suspect the nice and charming dad next door? How many times did you lay awake in bed at night, the events of that day replaying themselves over and over. Like a continuous loop with no escape…

It felt like yesterday. The only reason you were at the concert in the first place was because one of the other guys quit a week before. You couldn’t even blame him, since your boss was a total dick. Ever since you started working in the company a year ago he was just looking for a reason to fire you. Always criticizing you, commenting when your bathroom break was too long. Wore a skirt? Too provocative. Wore a sweater? Be more professional. You could make a whole list of the things he pulled off. You fucking hated working in that place and even more to work outside or around many people. You chose to work in IT because you could work alone and in peace.

Outside of work, you were a relatively social person. Many friends and people seemed to like you. Despite preferring to rather stay home alone, with your cat and books, you were surprisingly good at making conversations. It felt strange, kind of ironic. Life had a stupid sense of humor. Sometimes you even felt like you were good at reading people. Your mom called it your sixth sense.

Working at the arena for the concert was a real hassle. It was so stressful. Over a week before the actual concert there was already a meeting. Everybody working in the stadium that night was there. They didn’t reveal too much that day. Apparently the whole concert was also a trap for this serial killer?

They called him - The Butcher

You remember hearing and reading about him in the news. He had killed 12 people till now and the FBI was sure he was going to show up there. Everything was top secret, everyone had an extra card for controls during that day and a code word. On the day of the concert you arrived extra early to get the last directions for the day. They even told you what he potentially could look like.

Work was boring. The company you were working for was responsible for ensuring that all the screens, cameras were working, both on the outside and on the stage, that the wifi was stable and so on… not the hardest task. There also were others who ensured the overall technology and speakers worked, but that wasn’t your job. Most of the time you and your colleague were sitting backstage, talking shit about your boss and listening to the show, at least you were, because lovely colleague Eric would do most of the stuff alone. What a sweetheart, right?

It felt a bit bad taking advantage of him. You knew he had a big crush on you, he wasn’t exactly hiding it. Relaxing backstage appealed more to you. Therefore it was totally fine with your conscience. This job was a pain in the ass and you already started applying for new jobs. You just had to hang on for a few more weeks. Hoping you could quit soon and work in a non toxic environment.

The first half of the concert remained uneventful. Fortunately, because your room was in the backstage area, you even talked to Lady Raven for a bit on her break. She was so nice and friendly. On and off stage, her whole personality was the same. Which you found truly great, a person like that was hard to find nowadays. The thinker for example seemed like a total dick from what you saw. Lady Raven and you also had some similar interests, it was so easy to talk to her.After asking about it, she told you that they hadn’t found the Butcher yet. She even told you a few more details on how the police got the information of him being there. Before she left you wished her good luck with the rest of her show and went back to work for a bit.

Later on during the second half of the show, you stepped near the stage. The atmosphere felt incredible. The lights, the performance on stage and the fans screaming and singing the songs of Lady Raven. How you wished to be standing in the crowd just vibing and dancing to the music instead of working. If it weren’t for all the extra police and security in the arena, it would be a normal concert.

Slowly you started making your way backstage as you saw people approaching from the audience room. Honestly you weren’t keen on talking to many people. Lady Raven started talking and announcing her dreamer girl, Riley. That must be why the people came in from the audience. At the end of the stage you turned around again. On your former spot stood a man. He was tall, with a nice backside, no doubt the father of the dreamer girl, looking at the stage. Though he seemed to take a quick look around every now and then. Looking at him, he didn’t look like he was having much fun being here. He looked rather stiff. As you started walking back in his direction to get a better look, Eric called you. Sighing, you turned around. As you were making your way backstage, you felt like someone was watching you.

“Hey, somewhere outside, a monitor has a bluescreen. I'll quickly go fix it. The show is nearly over. After that, we can start with cleaning things up.” Eric told you, as you walked down the stairs towards him.

“Okay, do you need my help?” You asked him, pushing a blonde strand of hair behind your ear, batting your eyes at him, hoping he would say no.

“No of course not! I can do it alone. The problem is not that hard.” he answered, trying to show off.

You smiled. “Okay great! Then, see you later.”

You walked past him into the backstage area. It wasn't that you disliked him, he was nice for a work colleague. However, nothing more. For one you had not much in common besides work, and he was a pushover. You could not imagine being with a man who had no opinion and just waited for you say anything until he stated his opinion.

‘Like have an opinion, Boy?’ Rolling your eyes at the mere thought of his personality, you grabbed yourself a drink and went back to your little break room.

There you waited for the concert to finish, which you knew shouldn’t take too long now. When you heard the last song finished you decided to grab your purse and go into the hallway. Considering it was too good of an opportunity to pass by. When would you ever see celebrities up so close again? Maybe you could ask Lady Raven for a selfie? Or an autograph? You weren’t the biggest fan, but there was a possibility you could sell that autograph later on.

Uncertain where to go, you stood in the hallway. Dancers ran past you. Nobody seemed to take much notice of you. Coming from the left, you saw the thinker walking towards you, and kind of flirting with someone behind him. ‘Spicy.’ A light chuckle escaped you. Curiosity filled your brain and you decided to head in the direction he came from.

In the middle of the hallway, where several corridors met, stood Riley, the dreamer girl and her dad. If you remembered her name correctly that is. You stopped walking and observed them quietly from a little further away.

‘Did the Thinker flirt with him?’ Now that you got a better view of him, you found that theory pretty reasonable. It felt almost unfair how attractive he looked.

‘Was he married? Presumably.’ Not that you would consider making a move, besides his daughter was standing right next to him. That would be so awkward. Also remembering, the last time you let someone in, things unraveled in ways that left you a bit guarded. Despite your people skills, your mom and you apparently both had a thing for cheaters. After a year of being single, you told yourself it was for the best. Except for your job, life was good– At least that's what you tried to tell yourself.

Nevertheless you would never have considered being attracted to older men. He was at least 10 years older than you, maybe more. You were 25, and he could easily be in his 30s or even early 40s. All of a sudden the profiler’s description came back into your head: tall, strong, dark hair...

Even though you've never been overly spiritual, you did believe in a sixth sense. The longer you thought about it, him standing in that hallway backstage. The way he subtly kept looking around for a second. Nobody noticed. ‘Wait… Did he notice you watching them?’

Pulling out your phone, you started swiping and typing randomly. Trying to look busy. Your thoughts were racing. He matched the description perfectly, and here he was, casually joking with his daughter like he didn’t have a care in the world. Despite his friendly smile and demeanor, there was something unsettling about him—a bit too friendly, almost fake?

After looking at him a bit more, it just clicked into place. You couldn’t shake off the feeling that that may be him, the Butcher. Until now they hadn't found him, not that you knew of. So they were still searching for him. People backstage were rarely searched, except when they wanted to leave the arena.

‘God, you should think rationally. Could that really be him? Still he seemed normal…’

Except the look in his eyes. That look gave you unpleasant goosebumps. You grew anxious, you knew where the camera room was. Police officers were definitely going to be there and maybe the profiler was there. Then you could ask her if the man had been checked by security or talk to her about your uneasy feeling.

Unfortunately you would have to pass him to get to the camera office. If he hadn't noticed you before, he certainly would then. Could you keep your cool? It didn’t matter. You knew you would overthink it in the evening, you had to do it. Your heart was starting to pound audibly in your chest.

‘Deep breaths–

Breathe in, breathe out.

Close your eyes, take a deep breath and go. Don't panic.’ Grabbing your phone tightly in your hand, you started walking.

As you approached them, Lady Raven emerged from her dressing room and started talking to Riley. She was so happy, grinning from ear to ear. As they chatted happily, the dad leaned forward and whispered something to Lady Raven that you couldn't make out.

As soon as you heard her tell his daughter that they would talk shortly, alarm bells were going off in your head. Your brain stopped working, and your legs and mouth moved on their own. You felt a certain hero complex activating within you. ‘What if he was the Butcher? There was a possibility’

You felt uncomfortable leaving her alone with him. Something felt off. Before they could leave, you sprinted the last few meters towards them. Trying to cry on arrival.

“Lady Raven, hay… I eh.. I.. I don't... Could I.. could I talk to you for a second? Please, I don't know what to do.. I–” you sniffled. You tried your best to cry. ‘Come one, you could lie better than that’, you thought angrily at yourself. ‘Who would believe you like this?’ This wasn’t going to be the first lie you ever told. You even lied on your last résumé.

She immediately turned around her face full of concern and worry. For a second you thought you saw his jaw tensing and left eye twitch. ‘Did you imagine it? ‘

“Oh no. Hey, what's going on? You’re Y/N, right? We met earlier.” You nodded your head, keeping the hand over your lower face, while trying to remain in tears. For once, you were glad that you chose to wear your hair open today. Your long blond locks shielded your face even more from the prying eyes around you.

“What's going on? Are you alright? Did something happen?” She asked more and more questions, putting her hand on your shoulder, trying to comfort you.

“There was an accident, I...“ You just kept mumbling incomprehensible nonsense. Still shaking, sobbing, trying not to look up. You didn't even know what to do, what to say.

“Hay, ehm… I’m so sorry. Could you give us a second? I will be right back. It won’t take long.." she said, apologizing to the two of them.

“Of course, no problem. This seems serious! Take your time.”, said the man, his voice laced with concern.

‘Why did he sound so genuine, like he is truly concerned? Maybe I judged him too fast?‘

Gently Lady Raven took one of your hands and started to lead you away. It didn’t matter anyway, there was no going back. Now you need to play your outburst to the end and come up with a plausible story. While she brought you into her dressing room, it felt as if someone was staring holes into your back.

After the door closed, you immediately felt more at ease. Bit by bit you tried to calm yourself. At least that was what it seemed on the outside. You don’t remember much of what you told her, some kind of sob story. The first idea that came into your mind. About your dad having a car accident. The whole car crashed... With your car being parked further away from the arena and you were so afraid your dad could die. That you at worst wouldn't make it to the hospital in time with all the police controls going on in and outside the arena.

You cried, trying to think your story would be about your mom and not your dad. Which did the trick and made you sad. Being the kind person she is, Lady Raven suggested that you could drive with her in her limo, so you didn't have to go through the queues or security, and she would take you to the hospital or your car. You thanked her over and over again, as you wiped your tears away.

How high was the possibility that the dad would like to briefly speak to Lady Raven again, when you went in the hallway again? Then everything would have been in vain. However you could’t pressure her. Something came over you, so you suggested that perhaps the other two could join them. Maybe they could also drive in the car? You tried explaining your suggestion somewhat rationally. That way she can still talk with the dad,

you would feel extremely bad if you kept her from talking to her fans. You didn’t want to cause any more trouble.

Surprisingly, that seemed to work? No further persuasion was necessary. Which left you very surprised and perplexed. Was she truly such a kind person? Who was so trusting? Especially with everything that was going on here today. ‘Did she have such a shielded and good life, that she blindly believed you?’ You wondered.

‘Unimaginable…that could not be the case. You didn’t believe there were any truly good people left in this world.’

After another minute of collecting yourself, you went after Lady Raven. She had already gone ahead and had already told them the short version of what was going on, when you arrived. Asking them if they wanted to come too, so she and the dad could have their talk. She was way too kind and somewhat naive to even suspect you’d be lying. You almost felt ashamed of yourself, even stupid. What were you even doing?

The daughter gasped and tried not to jump up and down in joy, the way she gripped her dad's arm. She seemed to be torn between worrying about you and happiness. By being asked to drive with Lady Raven, her seemingly favorite artist in the world. She was honored and extremely happy for a few seconds, then she stopped and looked at you sympathetically.

“I’m so sorry about the thing with your dad...” Nodding weakly at her, trying to keep your act up, you gave her a half smile. Unknowingly to you, you had started twisting the ring on your middle finger. A Tic. Something you always did when you're stressed out or nervous.

The ring was nothing special. A plain black ring with some Greek numbers on it. A gift from your mom; from the only holiday you ever had taken outside the USA and since you were eighteen, there was hardly a day you didn’t wear it.

“Why don’t we lead the way? That way, we can talk.” said Lady Raven and gestured to the man.

“Yes of course... I mean, the circumstances are not the best, but thank you for considering Riley and me. We appreciate it.” He replied, looking concerned but with something unreadable in his eyes that made you want to look anywhere but at him.

“It is no problem at all. Actually it was Y/N here suggesting it. She would have felt bad if we hadn't been able to have our conversation because of her.”

He raised a brow at you. “That is so thoughtful and kind of you to still think of others. Something really rare these days”

As he walked past you, he briefly touched your shoulder, making you nearly jump out of your skin. “And I’m really sorry about your dad. I hope he pulls through. Let us know if there’s anything we can do to help” he smiled kindly at you..

“Yes, I hope so too. Thank you…” You trailed off, realizing you didn’t know his name.

“Oh I didn’t even introduce myself. I'm Cooper, just call me Cooper.” holding out his hand.

“Well, thank you Cooper. Also, for your offer, maybe I will come back to that." you shook his hand. He had a firm, but not to strong grip. 'so he was married'

"Let’s get going, please.” Somewhere in between Cooper coming close to you, you almost forgot that you had a mission to get to the hospital fast. Daddy dearest was waiting.

He nodded and as he passed you, walking ahead, you suddenly realized just how big that man was. You hadn't even noticed it before. However, standing right next to him you realized it. He was at least 6′2″, not overly muscular, but also not skinny either. Lady Raven seemed tiny next to him, and you weren’t tall yourself—maybe around 5′5″ on a good day.

Still, something about his vibe felt off. He seemed caring, yet on the other hand, almost relieved—or amused?

Riley and you walked a bit behind the two to the cat, nobody had to go through any controls. Riley was such a sweet girl, asking you questions or talking about the concert to ‘take your mind off of your situation’. She was so nice. You kind of wish that you had a little sister like her, but no, you only had a half brother. The only reason he ever contacted you was for money from our grandparents' inheritance.

It was only when you reached the end of the corridor, you noticed Cooper looking over his shoulder. One corner of his mouth pulled upwards and his expression changed. Something sinister in his eyes for a split second. So fast that you were doubting yourself again.

Near the limousine, you felt your phone vibrating, probably Eric wanting to ask where you were. You had no time for that now. Shaking your head, you declined the call and started to write to him, saying that an emergency had come up and you would be back later. You didn’t notice that you arrived at the car until someone cleared their throat in front of you.

Fuck, you almost ran directly into Cooper. Lady Raven and Riley had already gone inside. He looked at me expectantly, a small smile at his lips. You quickly locked your phone and held it up. “Sorry, my… Sister. She gave me the latest updates on our dad.." you explained, the lies just kept rolling off your tongue, and you just hoped they sounded believable. With that you went straight to the car, without waiting for a response.

Maybe you should have started an acting career…

You quickly sat down in the car, with Cooper following shortly after you. Keeping your phone in your hand to secretly keep twisting your ring behind it.

This guy was making you so nervous, not only him but also the lies. You even thought you heard a small deep chuckle from behind you, maybe it was just your nerves? The car started moving. You wondered what they talked about… What did he want to talk about to her?

Lady Raven's voice brought you out of your thoughts. “Y/N, where should I let you out? You remember where you parked your car? Or should we drive directly to the hospital?”

Car yeah… you almost laughed. You knew exactly where your car was, a few miles away at the mechanic, because your lights weren’t working. Why hadn’t you thought of that.

“Eh no, no! Just let me know where my car is. It’s a few blocks away. At this free parking space. There’s my car; let me look up the street real quick…” That wasn't a complete lie. Normally, you would park your car there, because it was just cheaper than parking near or in the stadium. Now just your bike was parked there, well, if nobody had stolen it.

You started to unlock your phone to look up the address. A large hand grabbed your hand with your phone to stop you. Before you could even protest or say something, Cooper started talking in his chipper, happy voice.

“Really? What a coincidence! I think that should be the same parking lot where Riley and I parked my car earlier. I do know the address, it’s just around the corner. You don't have to look it up.” Lady Raven pressed a button and Cooper told the chauffeur where to go. The address did sound somewhat familiar. You pulled your phone and hand out of his grip. There wasn't much resistance and he put his hands back into his lap.

You looked back at Riley and Lady Raven, they were deeply engaged in a conversation with each other. Noticing nothing around the. The phone in your hand started ringing again, and you quickly looked at the screen. This time, it was your boss; should you just accept the call? You did not get much time to think about it.

“Have you heard anything yet?”, came Riley’s question towards you.

You started twisting your ring again.

“Ah yes, yes… My brother texted me..” your breath caught in your throat. Realizing you messed up. ‘Didn’t you just say to Cooper that it was your sister? Maybe he didn't notice. Good thing you hadn’t pursued your acting career…‘

“...and the doctor said it doesn’t look critical. Our dad seems stable at the moment… but he needs to be operated on quickly.. I'm sure I will get more information as soon as…”

All of a sudden the whole car jolted to a stop, followed by wild car honking. You tried to find your footing, unintentionally gripping onto Cooper's thigh. Right before you could fall off your seat a hand pressed against your shoulder and pushed you back into the seat. You dug your nails even more into his thigh. Riley's bags tipped forward and many of the contents scattered a little on the floor. “Sorry, Lady Raven. The car in front of us braked abruptly." The driver apologized.

“Everyone alright?” Cooper asked, concern dripping in his voice.

“All good” said Riley and Lady Raven nodded.

“Yes, I think so..” you breathed. He came closer pushing a loose strand behind your ear. A blush crept on your face. After another second, you noticed your hand was still on his thigh, and you blushed even more.

“Oh I’m sorry!” You exclaimed in a panic. He smiled kindly.

“No problem. I’m glad nobody got hurt.” Then he got up from his seat to help Riley pick her things back up and put them back into the bags.

Your phone began to ring again. ‘It’s now or never; it would only get worse.’

With a sigh, you picked up the phone and immediately held the phone as far away as possible from your ear. A loud voice screaming through the speaker. Seemed like your boss just started screaming at you at the top of his lungs.

You mouthed a quick ‘Sorry’ to the others in front of you. He kept on screaming, ranting about how you were not at work and how he always knew you were a lazy piece of shit. He should have fired me months ago… The list goes on.

As Cooper sat back down. You tried to move your body back in the direction of your phone. Seeing as you didn't want to be too close to Cooper. He didn't seem to mind and put a calming hand on your knee this time. Your mind seemed to go fuzzy when you got near him.

Overall this was not your day, your nerves were all over the place. Your feelings felt like they were on a rollercoaster. You still weren't sure if your gut feeling was right… but you also didn't want to find out. All the lies you told today and now your boss is screaming at you? It was just too much. Clenching your fist and putting the phone near your ear again.

“I quit.” were the only words you said, dry of any emotion.

“What did you say?” came the angry reply.

“I quit” Hot tears were forming in your eyes, Cooper gently started to caress your knee. “i’m so fucking done. You don't know what I am going through right now! Someone could die, and you don't even let me explain myself. So go to hell, and I fucking quit.” Enraged, you ended the call and immediately blocked his number.

You put your head in your hands and sigh.

“I'm sorry… Sorry, you had to hear that. Everything goes wrong…” And with that, a sob escapes you.

‘Nobody can see my face, right? So maybe act even more sad? ‘

This whole day was a curse, why were you even here? Because you felt bad vibes from the dilf next to you? You just wanted to laugh over the whole situation.

‘You were fucking stupid and now jobless. Great work. Just because you wanted to play the hero, because of a stupid gut feeling. He was a normal dad. Not the Butcher. ‘

“Don't think like that. You said it yourself; your dad is stable, so that's a good thing. Maybe I can help you get a new job!” Lady Raven is really trying to cheer you up.

Someone rubbed your back gently, and there was only one person who could do that. You tried your hardest to ignore his comforting touch.

“Hay Y/N, I know you just met us, and you don't know me. But I bet a girl like you will easily find a new job. You seem like a good person. If you tell me in which field you work, I'm sure I could help. See if someone I know is hiring. How does that sound?” Cooper really tried to comfort you. He was so sympathetic and strangely charming.

A small laugh escapes you. "Yes, I probably will..” You wipe away your angry tears’.

“I mean… I already sent out job applications. I wanted to leave anyway, maybe I will get a job here in Philly or maybe where my mom lives. She lives more in the suburbs, like an hour away I think…” you paused.

‘Why did you suddenly decide to tell him so much about yourself? Didn't you want to keep a low profile and not give too much real information?‘

This guy certainly knew how to make people talk. About everything, even things they may not want to share and then do without even realizing it. ‘Fuck’

“See! Now you're even smiling again. You just need to see the positive things.” With that, he squeezed your shoulder lightly and withdrew his hand from your back. Making you almost miss the comfort and warmth they had brought you.

Stop crushing on the hot dad next to you! You tried to remind yourself and also remember all the things you thought were off with him.

“We're here,” the chauffeur announced. Great, finally. This car ride felt like an eternity.

Cooper and Riley got out of the car first, and they said their goodbyes. Riley, of course, needed one last hug, and Cooper simply thanked her again for what she did for Riley. Before you got out of the car, Lady Raven pulled you in for a hug.

“Please keep me updated on how things are at the hospital and if you need something. Just text me.” She pulled out her phone and pulled up Instagram.

“Just search for your username, and I'll add you. That way, we can keep in touch.”

You nodded and put in your name, and handed the phone back to her.

“Thank you.. so much. Again. I'm so sorry for any inconvenience I caused. I won't forget this. Thank you! Next time, I’ll be in the front row singing your songs.”

She laughed at that and nodded. While stepping outside the car, you crossed both fingers that the other two were gone.

Unfortunately, Cooper and his daughter waited for you. You had thought that by staying longer in the car, they would be gone already. No lucky day for you

You scanned the parking lot, and of course, your bike was stolen. The universe was just being cruel now.

“So let us walk you to your car!” Cooper was way too happy, waving the limousine of Lady Raven goodbye. “Sure..” You started walking towards the cars.

You were clueless on how to get out of this situation. Abruptly stopping, you looked around.

“I don't see my car..” you say while looking around again. You sigh extra loudly.

“Fuck me..”

“Your car got towed?” Cooper

“Maybe” a dry laugh escapes you.

“Or maybe with everything going on and all the things that were going on at the concert, I… just forgot where I parked my car.” You ran your fingers through your hair.

"Well, if you tell me which hospital you need to go to, I'm certain Riley and I can make a little detour on our way home. Right Riley?” Riley nodded.

“Of course, I’d be happy if we could help you out” she said, hopeful.

Right… the hospital. You should get better at remembering your lies. You were torn between keeping your lie up or simply turning around and walking away.

You didn’t know what to do. Cooper seemed a bit strange at times, but he could not be the Butcher, right? Still while looking at him you felt like something didn't add up. Sometimes… you didn’t know how to describe it… He felt too perfect, too caring or too sweet. Maybe that was just who he was? You were lost in thought.. The look in his eyes was making you feel a bit uneasy.

All of a sudden, Cooper's hand was behind your back, and he slowly pushed you forward. “If you can't decide, I will decide for you. Going to the hospital should be the most important thing. So we'll drive you and then you can worry about your car later. Okay?”

You nodded your head at his idea, simply because you didn't trust your words at the moment. His hand wandered up to your shoulder, where he kept a firm grip and pushed you in the direction of his car.

Riley was already running in front of you. You winced under his touch, did he know his own strength? You wondered. He certainly didn't look that strong. He opened the car a few meters away so Riley could already put her bags in the trunk.

A black van

You suddenly remembered what Eric told you about the profiler, she suspected the Butcher to drive a car like this?

Your body tensed up, and you felt like the pressure on your shoulder increased, which was almost painful. Surely that was going to bruise . Cooper opened the back door for you like you were a child being escorted home. You tried to muster your best friendly face before you sat down inside.

“Thank you... Have you had this car for a long time?” You asked before you could stop yourself. Cooper raised an eyebrow, clearly pondering the question before answering.

“Yes, I have had it for quite a few years now. Why are you asking?” Should you just tell him?

It was just the trip to the hospital.. then you would never have to see them again. You could not fuck up even more than you already had, and until now, it was just an uneasy gut feeling. Also, you were trying to move back to your mom, who was at least an hour away.

“No real reason.. Just that profiler from the concert. She talked so much, about everything and also about cars... especially mentioning a car like this, which could potentially be the car of a-… killer.”

He only stared at you.

‘Did you say something wrong? Maybe you’re the weird one now.’ Nervously rubbing your neck, you tried to lighten the mood with a laugh.

Thankfully, Riley was just on her way to the passenger seat. She didn't hear her, no need to scare her. You didn’t think she knew about what was going on behind the scenes of the concert.

“So maybe you should switch it up? But maybe she was just talking nonsense..” you tried to diffuse the situation, massaging your sore shoulder.

Cooper smiled and laughed softly. "Well, thanks for the tip. I thought about getting a new car. Maybe I should finally get one. More family friendly, any ‘smart’ suggestions perhaps?” -

“Hmm..maybe just something smaller, maybe in white, silver, or another color? Definitiv not black..” you smile.

“Great. I will keep that in mind when I buy a new car.” he smiled back at you and closed the door, and got in the driver's seat. He seemed like he wanted to ask more questions, tapping his finger on the steering wheel.

Quickly, you got your phone out and searched for a hospital near you. You found one which was 15 minutes away. When Cooper started the car you leaned forward, so much that your head nearly reached his shoulder and you could smell his aftershave. ‘He even smelled good.’ You showed him your phone.

“Here, that's the hospital where I need to go.” He slightly turned around to get a better look at the screen.

“Can I?” He gestured to the phone. “Just to get a better look.”

You gulped, a nervous feeling growing in your stomach. “Yeah sure..”

He didn’t even wait for your reply and grabbed the phone.

“You got some kind of privacy screen on here?” he asked with a raised brow.

Oh yeah, how could you forget, and here you thought he wanted to take your phone from you. When he couldn’t even see the screen.

“Yeah! Sorry, I totally forgot. My boss had cameras everywhere in the building, I got a bit paranoid, so I bought one of those..” you laughed.

“He doesn’t sound very nice. Maybe it’s a good thing you don’t have to work there anymore!” replied Riley.

“Yeah.. maybe”

“You could just work at my school, our teacher for IT sucks..”

Cooper glanced at her disapprovingly, slowly shaking his head. “Riley…”-

"Sorry, dad, it's the truth. He lives in the past. No one uses Windows XP anymore." Riley grumbled.

Cooper started the car, and Lady Raven's music was playing loudly over the speakers before he turned the volume down. After a few minutes of driving and Riley vibing to the music, Cooper cleared his throat.

"Here, you can have your phone back. Oh and I took the liberty of saving my number on your phone. That way, if you ever need anything or some help finding your car later, you can just give me a quick call.”

What the fuck. He did what now?

He smiled at you through the rearview mirror, his eyes watching you closely. Carefully, you grabbed your phone out of his hands.

“That's so… thoughtful. Thank you” You tried to put a smile on your face.

"So, Riley, how did you like the concert?” You tried changing the topic. Oh boy, that worked. Riley started rambling about everything, including how cool it was to be on stage with Lady Raven. Unconsciously, you found yourself smiling a real smile, she was just so cute. Your eyes flickered to the rearview mirror every so often, and as soon as you met Cooper's eyes, you looked back at Riley. Let’s not get lost because of his good looks. You still felt uneasy.

You tried telling yourself in your head. Somehow, you felt like a prey being watched by his predator. Once in a while you felt like his expression would flicker for a split second, his eyes becoming way darker, but it was gone so soon. You weren’t even sure if you saw it correctly or if it was your imagination. Even though the feeling was only there for a split second, He looked so friendly, encouraging Riley to talk more.

Finally, you could make out the hospital in the distance. About time, you thought.

“Hey Y/N?” Riley asked.

“Yes?”-

“Maybe when your dad is better again, you can visit us? I feel so bad for you. Today should have been a great day. _You seem really cool… I mean, your dad and family can come too..Right dad?” Cooper smiled and nodded.

“Great, Like a family dinner, my mom is a great cook.” So he was married. “I just would like to do something nice for you.” Oh god, the world didn’t deserve her kindness.

“Of course, you don't have to feel compelled to do so. Think about it, you don’t have to decide now..” Cooper interjected.

“The two of you are too kind. I can't,” more like won't, “give you an answer right now, but I promise to think about it. Okay?” You fake-gushed at the two, your face hurting from keeping the smile on your face.

Both Cooper and Riley seemed satisfied with the answer. You felt like you were in the wrong movie, was there a hidden camera somewhere? You arrived within the next minute. Cooper parked his car near the emergency exit. One moment away from freedom, away from this lie.

“I can’t really thank you enough. Thanks for driving me here. I hope you had a great day. Have a safe drive home.” You tried opening the door, but it wouldn’t budge. “Oh, child safety must be on. I’m sorry, I forgot.” apologized to Copper and exited the van to open your door. You didn’t believe him, it just matched too well.

“I hope you get good news inside. Dad acted really strange today, but I’m happy everything is normal again.” she smiled, before you could answer, and your door opened.

Daddy is acting strange today. You don’t say…

“Well, bye, Riley.” You waved at her and got out and barely got your hand out of the doof before Cooper shut it close.

“I’m so glad we could help you.” he said with that charming voice of his. He started to walk with you towards the building. “With all the extra police force, because of the Butcher, it could have taken you at least an hour to get here.”

“That's true. Well maybe next time he shouldn't let his recipes laying around in his hideouts. What does he even want at a pop concert?” you snorted.

“Did he now?” Cooper asked intrigued.

“At least that's what I overheard from a few higher up people today.”, no way you were saying that it was Lady Raven who told you.

“Seems like he needs to be cleaner and more careful.”

“If not, they might just catch him next time,” you joked.

“I don't think that will happen, sweetheart.” His mouth twitched in amusement.

That was a weird response. He must have seen the frown on your face, as he quickly started to explain himself.

“I mean if they didn't catch him today, while they knew he was going to be there. I think the chances of the police finding him again are relatively close to zero.” His reply sounded reasonable.

“Well yes, but he fucked up once. Maybe he is getting sloppy with time. Nobody knows.”

His jaw clenched. “You think so? Maybe you're misinterpreting the situation. I would imagine someone like him to be very calculated. Otherwise the police would have found him already, if he was being sloppy.”

“True…” You shrugged your shoulders. Maybe you were wrong, but why did he sound somewhat angry at your statement?

He was honestly acting strange now.

“Well I think this is where I leave you.” Cooper announced after a few seconds of silence. His behavior over the last meters made you feel unsettled again. He seemed strange. ‘Why was he like that?’

“Okay…”, should you with your gut feeling, you wondered? Fuck it, it was just a guess, a wild guess. You always knew your big mouth would get you into trouble someday. Maybe he was just a normal dad and you were overthinking the situation. If that was the case, he wouldn’t think anything of it.

“By the way B-...Cooper” you began, and Cooper turned around in a second, looking at you expectantly, one of his brows raised. His face was unreadable. “You're welcome.. You know that? For getting to drive with Lady Raven"—for getting out of there without the security controls - was what you wanted to say. Even if he were the Butcher his facial expressions and body language didn't betray him. He smiled and stepped back toward you. Every bone in your body wanted to run. ‘Fuck, did this creep you out.’ You felt like you were pushing your luck today

“Yes.. of course. I am very grateful for that…” Before he could say anymore, Riley pulled down the window.

“Dad! Let's go home! Y/N needs to go to the hospital! And I want to tell mom all about the concert!”

“She's right. I don't want to keep you from your father any longer. I bet your sister is waiting for you. Better go inside.” ‘He knew, he knew you lied when you fucked up with the sister and brother thing.’ Panic started to set in, you swallowed hard, your throat dry.

He came even closer and engulfed you in a tight hug. You stood there, frozen in place. He leaned his head down to your ear, his hands holding you even tighter. One of them slowly wandered to your lower back while he talked.

“Thank you, sweetheart. You sure made it easier. I’m sure Spencer will be soo grateful. I’ll let you know…” a dark chuckle escaped him.

“It's a small world. I'm sure we will see each other again.” His deep voice whispered in your ear, which sent shivers down your spine. You felt trapped. Like a tiny mouse next to him, holding your breath unintentionally. He patted you on the back. Smiling, he stepped away.

‘Breathe– mask your emotions. Get a grip.’ Many different thoughts running through your head.

Tilting your head to your side you looked at him. Moreover you were confused. Even a tiny bit scared.

‘Please don’t let him notice. Who was Spencer? Did you know Spencer?’

Furrowing your brows you asked “Spencer?” your voice slightly quivering.

He grinned even more— it looked unnerving. It was replaced by a much friendlier smile after another second. “Don’t worry about it.”

‘Were you imagining things? Now you knew why people said “don't play with fire.” Why had you said anything at all...’

His voice became louder, having that charming undertone again “and make sure to call sweetheart. Riley would be very happy if you came over.” Winking at you he turned around and walked back to his car.

You felt like your chest was about to explode.

“Yes! Once your dad's out of the hospital and things settle down, Make sure to call my dad. Then we can have a fun dinner.” giggling Riley's voice went even higher. She was practically shifting in her seat, unable to sit still.

‘Fun dinner? Yeah.. sureeee kid..’

You mustered your best smile and gave her a thumbs up.

“I will kiddo. See you around.” trying to steady your voice. You needed to get away fast. turned around and walked towards the hospital, near the end you were almost running.

Once inside, you had the feeling that it was getting harder and harder to breathe. As if you weren't getting enough air. Your breathing became more and more rapid. Your vision was blurred.

‘Was this hyperventilation? What was going on? Was he really the Butcher? Were you right? Would you die next? Maybe he would keep you alive because you unintentionally helped him?’

Anxiety welled up inside you. You barely noticed the loud voices around you.

‘Did you hear someone calling for help?’

You had the feeling that the world was spinning around you. ‘Were you still walking?’ It felt like your legs were made out of jelly.

Someone was talking to you, holding you by the shoulders. Shaking you. Waving something in front of your face. However, you couldn’t make out the words. You couldn't recognise the face in front of you. Everything sounded dull, like it was far far away. The world became increasingly blurred before your eyes, spinning more and more–

until you finally gave in and everything went dark.

#cooper adams x reader #cooper adams #trap 2024 #trap movie #josh hartnett #wtf am i even doing #cooper adams x you #female reader #cooper adams x y/n #cooper abbott #cooper abott × reader #cooper adams fanfiction

70 notes · View notes

robyn-goodfellowe · 1 year

Note

I KNEW THAT HAND WAS TOO FUCKING CLOSE IM GOING TO EXPLODE AGAGAGAGAGAG. I'm so excited to see where this goes cause holy shit. Poor Bow is gonna have some serious adjusting to do :( I think out of everyone she's having the worst go at it tbh like ya kid got puppetized and mu is suffering and timmy is fucking gone (L) but like poor Bow has had her entire world turned upside down, facing the end of time itself, both people closest In her life were lying to her about major parts of themselves, has to work with a woman she barely knows outside of books, to go fins her missing friend who just took her sight in an incredibly violent way! (though it was very cool to read eye trauma my beloved) like she needs a vacation. and therapy. lots of therapy. anyways nice to see all the cut the strings bullshit from the puzzle finally get its payoff.

speaking of I hope people are liking the art, I had a great time with it being a little secret :) all for me, little puzzle page gift. but in the end, the real gift for me was the puzzle page itself, like THATS SO COOL. the puzzle solver becomes a part of the puzzle :) her own little spot in the grand scheme of it all :)

anyways thanks for the great chapter I understand why you were losing ur shit over it I would too tbh. 12 15 22 5 25 1 11 9 14 7 <3

EHEHEHE i'm really curious to know what your initial thoughts or expectations were about that piece! it's definitely one that i love really deeply, it's not my first time working with that artists hehe and they always manage to blow everything they create completely out of the water :3c

with that being said AAAAHHH I'M SOSOSO HAPPY YOU LIKED THE CHAPTER HOWDY. i was SO excited for it like honest to god somethig possessed the hell out of me because while it's been sitting on my outline for eons, i shit you not i churned it out in two days. very very rough shitposty draft day one and final draft day two. i don't think i've ever written that fast in my life. i'm not sure i ever will again

bow is definitely going through the worst of it for realsies like out of everyone she is just continuously getting screwed over. no house, no cat, no job, no mental stability, no vision, no emotional support timmy... all she wanted was to be cats with kid and look where that got her 😭 at least she has minuit back tho lol? but i mean with everything else going on that hardly makes up for it. its just sooo easy to kick her when shes down though........ she definitely is gunna need a lot of vacations+therapy after this. but maybe we should focus on her hospital bills first

im so happy you had fun with the puzzle heheeh i already miss it so much!!!!! im glad we got the chance to cement you in there. youve been so dedicated, you deserve it! :3

thank you for the kind words howdy im sorry it took me so long to reply... i always like to let these things sit so i can just look at them and feel all warm and fuzzy. 12 21 22 21 20 15 15 11 9 14 7

#answered #howdy tag #twtt spoilers #acit

3 notes · View notes

bound-writings · 4 years

Note

Hey hey! I was wondering if you could make some amane/hanako fluffy relationship head canons 👀

omg yes sure im sorry youve have to wait like a year for this im sorryyy also i have ur other request i pwomise ill do it soon 🥺❤️

Hanako Relationship HCS

Hanako is just,, the best boyfriend ever... He is just a wholesome ghost who just craves affection from his loved one. Hanako will always be initiating affection at you in a relationship. He’s all over you, a part of him is always touching a part of you. Whether it’s hand holding or pinky linking, he’s always near to you, as if he’s bound to you. One of his favorite pastimes is making you blush, so expect frequent surprise He likes to squish your cheeks too, it’s adorable to him when he sees your lips all pursed up, furrowed eyebrows and flushed cheeks as you try to get him off you. If you turn the tables on him and squish his cheeks, well, prepare for the most cutest sight you’ll ever see in your whole life. Hanako gets very embarrassed and red when you show affection to him first. Not that he minds, of course, he’s just like “wow I actually have an amazing lover who actually wants to love and kiss me despite me a flipping ghost.” He won’t comment on your affection until a bit later, right now he’s too flustered to say any coherent words. He will most definitely tease you about it though. Ah yes, there is also a lot of teasing in this relationship. No worries, it’s just harmless fun though! He’ll tone it down if you’re uncomfortable.

When I say Hanako is attached to you, I mean it. Even during class, this boy is there with you because apparently he has nothing better to do. So be prepared for people to see you talking to thin air for a while. If you try to shoo him away, he’ll act like he’s hurt by your oh so cruel words and just hug you tighter. Another thing, Hanako loves back hugs!! There’s nothing more satisfying than him squeezing you, his face buried in the crook of your neck, and he wordlessly cherishes your existence. The part he loves the best, however, is when you back hug him! Sneak up on his boy and hug him and he’ll be like putty in your hands. How he loves when your chest presses up against his back, wisps of your hair caressing his body, and your warm breath tickling his neck. It just makes him completely melt in your arms… but don’t call him out on it, at least not later. If you mention it while you’re holding him, he’d snap out of his daze and immediately realize what’s happening, and try to break free from your grasp, all in all ruining the moment. So if you want some wholesome moments… just stay quiet for a bit. He also likes to put his hat on you, especially when you’re feeling down (he just thinks it’s mega cute seeing you wear his clothes.)

Hanako trusts you A LOT. He has never let anyone this close to him, not when he was alive and not now. Well, that’s until he met you. You are someone who he can confide in and not feel like he’s being a nuisance. Whenever he has flashbacks from when he was alive, you’re the first person he would go to for comfort. Even though he doesn’t tell you the full story, he still loves you. He just wants to protect you from his painful past and his brother. Call him “Amane” and he might cry harder and hold you for hours.

Hanako is quite comfortable with PDA. He will probably rub it in Yashiro’s face that he’s literally dead and can still get dates, leading to Kou trying to fight Hanako. You name it, he’s holding your hand, arm around your waist, quick pecks on your cheek around anyone and everyone. Now, he does get a little bit nervous whenever you initiate PDA because he knows he can get a bit blushy and therefore doesn’t want people like Kou blackmailing him for “acting like a schoolgirl in love.” There’s also a lot of pet names! Hanako’s vocabulary ranges quite far, but his favorite and most used names always tend to deal with food. He likes to call you honey, sweet, and sugar in particular and actually anything that makes you flush. Once he called you donut with the most affection he could muster but you got offended because like?? Who calls their partner a donut?? He got all embarrassed and had to explain that you looked as delectable as a donut and tasted as sweet as one. And he left apologetically because he felt kind of stupid but you were like?? Wow that was kind of romantic actually..

DONUTS. Teaching Hanako to make donuts is one of my favorite little headcanon. You were like?? Hanako-kun?? How do you love donuts so much but you have no clue how to make them? So now you took it upon yourself to teach your beloved ghost boyfriend how to make his favorite sweet treat! Now, it’s going to have to be a time where barely anyone is around because you don’t want people to see you screaming and laughing by yourself. Hanako will need a lot of supervision in the kitchen (thankfully he isn’t as bad as Teru.) Hanako is more interested in watching you make the donuts and then him eating them so you’re going to have to discipline this boy. Of course, he comes around and he actually has a good time with you! His favorite part is when he gets to lick the spoon with the frosting. He will also 100 percent throw flour on you which escalates into a full-blown fight and ends up with both of you looking like actual ghosts with how white you are. You’re going to have to hold Hanako down because when it is time to clean up, he’s going to try and escape so don’t let that happen unless you want to be stuck cleaning by yourself. LET HIM FEEL YOUR PAIN WHEN YOU HAVE TO CLEAN HIS TOILETS.

Soon enough Hanako tries to make donuts for you, trying to return the favor (because.. he loves you 👉👈🥺.) He doesn’t even know how he managed to stay in the home economics room for so long without anyone noticing the chaos that’s going on in there. When he finishes the donuts… well they can’t even be called donuts because he messed them up so badly. And so he’s standing there, covered in dough and flour feeling quite sad because the donuts were meant for you and he failed miserably. Now, time to get rid of the evidence before you could come and see - too late… The door slammed open and you immediately winced at the state of the room, trying to fan the burnt smell out of the air. Ah, shit.

“Hanako-kun?! What the heck were you doing in here?”

Hanako rubbed the back of his head awkwardly making a peace sign with his fingers. “Just.. just cooking up some donuts like how you taught me to, (Name)-chan!”

“...I didn’t teach you to make a mess! What were you even thinking… what if someone came in and saw things floating in mid-air!” You hurried over to the ghost with a towel in hand. “If you wanted some donuts, you could have asked me to make-” pausing midsentence, you squinted at the bag on the table. Scrawled on brown paper bag read “For (Name)-chan.”

Noticing your attention at the table, he quickly stepped in front of your line of view with a nervous grin. “Let’s clean up now (Name)-chan~”

But your attention was directed at the slightly burnt donuts on a plate. Hanako hadn’t made donuts to satisfy himself, he made them to show his gratitude to you! You felt touched as your heart pattered against your chest. You reached towards the burnt donuts.

“W-wah?! (Name)-chan, don’t eat that!”

You munched on the treat. It was burnt, but still had the lingering taste of sweetness, and most important, Hanako’s love. Hanako’s jaw dropped as he grabbed both of your hands.

“(Name-chan), why would you eat that?! It’s horrible and burnt, and all messed up!”

You shook your head, smiling at him while you licked the crumbs off your fingers. “It’s actually not too bad, Hanako-kun. Actually quite scrumptious for being burnt! You just need to learn to bake for a shorter amount of time and you’ll be a master at donut making in no time! Here, have a taste!”

You smashed your lips onto his. Hanako could taste the burnt donut on your lips, but all he cared about was that you were kissing him. Letting go of your wrists, instead he snaked his hands up and intertwined his fingers with yours.

Don’t doubt the wholesomeness of Hanako, he’ll have you busting uwus all day bro. Precious ghost bb most be protected.

#toilet bound hanako kun #jibaku shounen hanako kun #tbhk #jshk #tbhk x reader #jshk x reader #hanako kun #amane yugi #yugi amane #hanako x reader #hanako kun x reader #amane x reader #amane yugi x reader #yugi amane x reader #toilet bound hanako kun x reader #jibaku shounen hanako kun x reader #tbhk headcanons #jshk headcanons

2K notes · View notes

autel-luna · 5 years

Text

Scorpio season is always so specially to me.. it's such a powerful time of inner alchemy.. I thought Id share a messaged I channeled for my business on here for anyone who may need it.

""We do not thrive despite of the storm, we thrive because of it." - Will Smith

Happy New Moon in Scorpio Beloveds.. I think we can all agree that there is so much depth to this new moon.. It might not be entirely chaotic, there's a beautiful stillness to it.. But its sharing with us so many things about ourselves.. how far we've come.. where we are yet to go.. us as humanity.. It's really quite beautiful.

Last night I was watching the season finale of season 1 of the new Charmed.. (spoiler alert) and in the final episode, one of the oldest sisters, separated from her other two, had her insecurities played out on full blast. She was afraid of being abandoned.. because she didn't have her mother growing up like the other two.. for so long she was so convinced everyone she ever loved would leave her.. She would make sure to push people away before they could walk away.. until her sisters showed her.. that no matter her pain they weren't going anywhere.. And she had the opportunity to let go of the past, no matter how painful it was and choose a new future by seeing there was love in this world that would not abandon her.

In some ways.. that's the metaphor Scorpio season presents us with. Situations in our life are on replay, especially around our core wounds.. We may feel like situations seem the same.. But if you choose to lean into them.. if you choose to admit you want to make the same subconscious moves you have made many times and be vulnerable, you'll realize the players on the outside are no longer truly playing with the same reactions.

We too.. are being presented with the opportunity to realize, the past is now over.. And there is love in this world that will never leave us. From our tribes, from ourselves, from the Universe that made us. We are safe to let go.

We are safe to know that everyone is a little bit of a mad genius, we all have our stories and yet.. We are done making bonds out of trauma and instead building community based on our purpose for a magical, beautiful, passionate world. We are so ready for that.

It doesnt mean the work isnt over.. It just means we no longer have to go searching for it. Healing is cyclical.. And when we are ready to meet the next edge, there's no need to worry.. Life will shows exactly where to remove the next barrier to wholeness, oneness and love.

Yesterday, after a year in the making and 6 hours of excruciating pain with one of the most magickal sisters I know.. My Matron finally appeared on my leg. I went through periods of not knowing if I wanted the tattoo, if she was even my matron.. all sorts of things before we even started the sketching process. Even after the first few hours of starting, I thought to myself wow.. is this really worth it? (She is almost finished, one more session still!!!) Because it was painful and took effort on my own part.. And then I got reminded that we often make big commitments, not always realizing why we started.. And a few steps into the process we begin to realize the feet ahead of us.. And we so often want to give up.. that's that moment we need to take a deep breath.. And remember why we started. That beautiful things do take work and sacrifice.. And finally they come into full bloom and they are magnificent. That applies to so many of the one of a kind long lasting things we want to create.

For so long, I thought Diana's bow and arrow was solely about the visions we manifest.. But sometimes it is an arrow showing us to our potential that whispers "remember why you started. remember who this is for. Remember all of this possibility of who you get to become on the otherside."

I wear her with honor. Because I know that she is the Goddess whom guides me.. And yet she literally is me. She is the woman who I am becoming.. And I am already in so many ways. The one who trusts in the cycles.. the one who is protector of the innocent.. the one who has her bullseye on the big picture.. the one who knows she was born wild, powerful and pure.

So much has happened in my life.. much joy and much pain.. every single day I learn about how I came to be the way that I am.. And if you honestly asked if I would take it all back.. I would always say no.

We are mighty because of all the storms that made us. When we process what is painful, and let go of the emotional discharge.. It becomes wisdom. Scorpio is the master alchemist.. he knows where the wound lies.. So does the gold. So does your superpower and gift to the world.

You are a beautiful now, and a beautiful becoming. Remember why you started. Celebrate how far youve come.

You are the magician of your life.. And if you are in deep pain right now.. know if you lean into your inner world, you get the chance to reawaken like the Phoenix you truly are.

So much love to you my amazing friends. Have an amazing Sunday 💋🎉"

23 notes · View notes

esmiblood90irisglimmer · 6 years

Text

Say No To This (Eliza Version/Role-Reverse)

Disclaimers: LONG FANFIC!!!

Theodosia POV

Another warm summer night engulfed the city NYC where I began yawning and realizing it was already past ten o'clock. Deciding to wrap things up by going through one last files one last time before going home. Knowing Aaron would be worry sick that I stay longer at work than I’ve intentionally. Oh well, at least I can have my handsome holding me in his strong arms. Just thinking about me make me blush and giddy all shyly, which I know it’s stupid for a grown woman to be acting like a teenage girl again. Hey, that’s love for you especially being married to the man or women you’ve been for more than a decade. It’s a magical experience when you created the wondrous memories as a married couple. There’s going to be ups and downs and which is part of life and you just have to accept it. Even when you’re in complete denial. Which I could say for a certain I know that writing completely non-stop at the office next door.

You see, my old friend my dearest Elizabeth Schuyler Hamilton is working her ass off to the brink of exhaustion. I worry about her but knowingly how stubborn and hard headed she can be sometimes. I often worry about her physical and mental state. I hope she doesn’t scare me like last month when she was buried alive under all those paperworks. That woman is seriously gonna give me a heart attack one these days. Anyway, as a good friend basically the mother friend of our group. I always tend to check up on her before leaving the office. Knowing that her answer will be that she’ll be spending another night here at the orphanage. I wasn’t going to argue with her about it but still at least take one day off. Then again it has taken her husband almost a decade to finally take a break from work. Well, like wife, like husband as some may say.

I see her with papers scatter around the desk with multiple profile of some the new orphanages we receive from other states. Lightly knocking on the door which caught Eliza attention which she given me her usual soft smile.

“Yes, Mrs. Burr. Is there anything you need?” she asks

“No, I’m letting you know that I’m heading home now. It’s already past ten o’clock so Aaron is probably worry sick about me”

Eliza chuckle lightly before understanding that Aaron is a bit overprotective of me but in a cute way. Deep inside her heart she was longing for the company of Alexander but he and their children were at Upstate. Apparently, visiting her father until catching up with Lafayette mid-way through the journey to South Carolina. They wanted surprise John with a visit of their own unannounced. I can understand her loneliness but she made the choice to stay behind for the orphanage and for me. We share our goodbyes before taking my leave as I left the door to be locked. Since I didn’t want any strangers or psycho manic having the intention to murder my innocent friend. Anyway, during my walk on the way I notice a tall male with a noticeable black eye. I whine on the inside feeling that he either got it from a bar fight or from his wife.

Domestic abuse isn’t uncommon sadly and seeing the abuse victim walking toward to our orphanage is heartbreaking but brave as well. What weird about him is that he’s wearing a large black hat with a long black coat. Perhaps to cover the bruises and the scars he received from his spouse. But that one thing stood out from his outfit was a tight red shirt that would grasp on his muscular chest. Ignoring my appearance despite me waving at him to be polite but I didn’t care. He continue to walk toward the direction of the orphanage before looking at the window in which located Eliza office. It made my heart skip a beat just for a moment but there wasn’t I couldn’t do since I’m off work.

Walking away from the scene as I pray deeply that this doesn’t become that I think would lead to. I hope that Eliza doesn’t do something stupid that would cost her marriage. Then again, our Lord works in mysterious ways than beyond our imagination. I simply shrug and ignore the tangles of knot that bewling with one gut to another.

Theodosia Sr

There’s nothing like summer in the city.

Someone under stress meets someone looking sexy

There’s trouble in the air, you can smell it

And Eliza is by herself....

I’ll let her tell it

Eliza POV

I was left alone in this semi-huge orphanage just by myself working on each of the children files. Just the ones that I’m assign to but that wasn’t enough. By that, I mean the only ones here are the servants on night shift. They look after the kids making they’re sleeping peacefully. Or looking after the ones that were deeply sicks and so they manage their medication from here and there. Sighing to myself out of despair as I thought about my darling Alexander and my friendly Lafayette. They decided to go Upstate in order to visit my father since the children dearly misses him. Along with the midsummer is when they’re going to visit Laurens in South Carolina since it been so long since they last met. Mulligan is going to meet on the middle part of the journey since it would be nice to create a surprise visit for John. It’s nice to know that they all have each others but Angelica and I are separated from miles apart. Not to mention...I lost Peggy from the war after she was shot..from a signal gunshot wound. Sacrificing her life for an innocent child that had nothing to do with it. Except being a daughter of a sl....I can’t bring myself to say it. But yes, that event change me and Angelica a lot especially toward my father who clearly cherish her since she is one of his beloved daughters.

Leaving behind her husband and beautiful son behind but we still visit them but enough of the depress thing. I harshly rubbed my eyes as I been here at my office for a week. Brushing my fingers into my semi greasy hair and thought I should go home as well. Packing my things up as I thought about Alexander just holding in his arms. As we share the bed we slept in together. Or having Lafayette just escorting me around the city while trying to make me laugh. His corny jokes somehow manage to make me laugh from here and there. Just would’ve been nice to have one of them here by my side. Until I heard a knock from downstairs.

Eliza

I haven’t slept in a week

I was weak, I awake

When I’m alone in my room, sometimes I stare at the wall

Longing for Lafayette, Missing my Alexander

I heard a knock on the door, I knew it wasn't my husband That’s when Mister James Reynolds walked into my life He said:

Walking downstairs before opening the door to see a tall man with a large black hat and long black coat. Quite an odd outfit but I brush it off. I notice the black eye on his face which aches my heart. Knowing that this black eye must’ve come from his abusive spouse. I offer him some tea as we discuss in the living room before introducing himself to be Mr. James Reynolds. Which he announce his reasonings of why coming to the orphanage so late at night.

James Reynolds

I know you are a woman of honor

I’m so sorry to bother you at home

But I don’t know where to go

And I came here all alone...

Eliza:

He said...

James Reynolds

My wife been doing me wrong

Beating me...

Cheating me...

Mistreating me...

Suddenly, she up and gone

And, I don’t have the means to go on

I felt extremely upset to know about this poor going through an abusive marriage. Not to mention that he has a young daughter only about five years old. Wondering how could I help this man and his daughter as well. Giving me the facts that she comes and goes from three days to weeks, lead to months from on end. Decided to give him some extra crash that I’ve stock away in her desk drawer. Pulling out approximately about thirty bucks which is quite a lot back then. Thirty bucks could’ve equivalent to like a hundreds. Then again it’s the 1700s, so it wasn’t an issue trying to store a few extra cash. Giving, Mr. Reynolds the money to see that he’s very grateful that anyone would loan him such a large amount of money. Wiping the tears of joy away before leaning his arm to hold onto. Well, I didn’t see a problem for a woman to escort a find young man home.

Eliza:

So I offered him a loan, I offered to walk him home, he said

James Reynolds:

You’re too kind mam

Eliza

I gave him thirty bucks that I have stock away

He lived a block away, he said:

James Reynolds:

This one’s mine, mam

Surprisingly the the orphanage isn’t that too far off from where Reynolds live at. Then again, he live only a block away so it was only a short ten minutes. I would stand outside just letting the kind man to enter inside his house safe and sound. Hopefully, his wife is either asleep or isn’t home at the moment which brought a tight knot in my stomach.Then, i could go home and take a long hot bath and probably take the day off tomorrow. Since I haven’t slept nor bathe in a week. So, I probably smell very sticky which isn’t very ladylike of me. Turning away as I started to walk in the direction of where my home was. About to take my leave I felt James hand grabbing my own with a light blush on his face. Veryly confuse, as I didn’t prepare myself of what was about to happen next.

Eliza:

Then I said, “well, I should head back home,” He turned red, He led me to his bed Place me between his legs and said:

James Reynolds:

Stay?

Eliza:

H...Hey...

James Reynolds:

Hey...

Not even knowing what just till the last second is when I’m between Reynolds legs. With his arms around my waist as I lay on top of his bare. Apparently, I must’ve believe that he unbutton his red shirt during the time I went blank. Feeling my entire body heating up and my face turning into cherry red. Wasn’t sure how I magically escape from the grasp of his arms but that wasn’t the case. As a married woman and Reynolds being a married man shouldn’t doing something so sinful. Not to mention, I have Alexander and can’t let myself be the one to break his heart. Reaching toward the door but before getting the grasp on the knob. Reynolds held me from behind just my heart accelerating and my body hitting once again.

Feeling his lips just leaving butterflies kissing across my neck to the my bare shoulders. Barely knowledge that this man has strip my dress off my body. Leaving me in my closet and others underclothing just leaving me to shiver. Turning me around as I face this man in the eyes but adirmating his bare chest. Lightly breathing heavily but soon I mentally slap myself. Telling myself that I have a husband and children nevertheless. This devilish man has this sinfully smirk as he place his chest just feeling his heart beating.

Eliza: That’s when I began to pray:

Lord, show me how to

Say no to this

I don’t know how to

Say no to this

But my god, he looks so helpless

And his body’s saying “hell yes”

James Reynolds:

Whoa...

Eliza:

Lord, show me how to

Eliza/ Ensemble (Aka the fandom): Say no to this

Trying to put my dress back on and get the heck out there but Reynolds has other plans. Holding me closer to him as our lips were just meter aparts just barely brushing each others. The grids in my mind were grinding wildly just telling me “Get the hell out of there”. But I couldn’t feel my body, didn’t have the courage to pull away. That wasn’t the case...I didn’t want to push myself away from this find man. Turning my face away for a moment. Until, I felt him lifting my chin up just meeting my gaze to his before leaning. His lips against my own just made everything I have thought just few out the window. Before he lead me to the once again.

Eliza: I don’t know how to Eliza/ The fandom Say no to this Eliza: In my mind, I’m tryin’ to go The Fandom: Go! Go! Go!

Eliza: Then his mouth is on mine, and I don’t say…

Throughout the entire time I spent with this stranger of man just letting him pleasure. Just forgetting Alexander, Lafayette, Angelica, the kids. Basically just everyone I’ve ever knew as he and I done it in his bed. At his house, where his wife could’ve walk in on us but I didn’t care. I was alone and longing for companion. But my mind is screaming me with rage literally scolding for doing a cruel act. Letting myself get involved in adultery that I’ll soon regretted later on.

The Fandom:

No! No! Say no to this!

Third POV

Unaware by his wife adultery with another married man, Alexander Hamilton a proud father and helpless husband. Smiling happily while looking at the pendant that his late younger sister- in law, Peggy gave to him. It was originally a birthday gift but the widely woman decided to give this little gremlin as a wedding. Chucking by the memories of the late Peggy but blush while smiling a little. It was a picture of him and Eliza on their wedding day which brought warm memories to him. That day brought heartbreaks to both Lafayette and Laurens. As the French general has fallen deeply in love with Elizabeth Schuyler but given her up for his brother. While John is in love with his best friend but was already marriage and have a daughter of his own. Still, they wanted to see this Caribbean immigrant keeping a beautiful smile while basketing his love for Eliza.

The Hamilsquad has finally reunited after being seperated from the war for far too long. Which has been nearly a decade or more since the four men last saw each others. Apparently, Burr is suppose to meet up with the others at Lauren house but wasn’t able to at the last minute. As his daughter has gotten ill which is terrible for a child to be sick during the summer. Anyway, nearly getting side tracked as the four males were playing around with the children. Dancing with them, playing with them, and etc. As the children run around Alexander pull his pendant. Staring at the picture at his beautiful as he felt helpless once again after all these years during their marriage.

Alexander / The Fandom:

Helpless!!

(Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey)

Looking into your eyes

And the sky’s the limit

(Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey)

I’m helpless

(Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey)

Lafayette saw his brother smile weakly while spinning around like the lovesick puppy that Hamilton is. Walking away from the immigrant as the French male heart tighten a bit knowing fully well that Eliza will never be his. He has come to terms with it but still heartbroken after all these years. Now, married with another woman in France with children of their own. Yet, Lafayette still loves Eliza and that would never change. Even that meant marrying someone else. As one brother is smiling happily with hearts flying around him as the other brother was staring out the window. A single tear rolled down his caramel skin before brushing it away in order not to let others know.

Alexander/Lafayette

Will she ever be satisfied?

(Down for the count,

And I’m

Drowning’ in them)

She will never be satisfied

Back at New York is where both men were unaware that Eliza is sleeping with another married man. But also growing mutual feelings for him as well. As Eliza woken up from his bed in shock and disgusted with herself for letting this happen. Trying to break it off and made sure this was a one time only moment. Well ain’t that fantasy that Eliza suddenly ask for too much. As the guilt and regrets will arrive years later and she won’t even how the affair being leak out. Though she didn’t care and immediately left the house luckily, no one was around to started ridiculous gossip. Heading straight home to take a bath and sleep hopefully this is the final counter she’ll have with Reynolds. Or so she thought.

Eliza: I wish I could say that was the last time I said that last time. It became a pastime A month into this endeavor I received a letter From a Mrs. Maria Reynolds, even better, it said: Maria: Dear Madam, I hope this letter finds you in good health And in a prosperous enough position to put wealth In the pockets of people like me: down on their luck You see, that was my husband who you decided to Eliza: Shhhh—

A month past by and her affair with Reynolds continue and escalated to him spending multiple night at her house. As they slept on the same bed that she with her darling Alexander. No matter how many time she wanted to call this affair off. Reynolds always seduce her back into his arms by that charming and charismatic attitude of his. Those methods always make her legs jelly and wobbling. It lead them to exchanging tiny little love letters from here and there. Until one day, at her office Theodosia brought her letter which was sent from Mrs. Maria Reynolds. Feeling her blood run before locking the door. Reading the telegrams which is promptly by none other than Reynolds wife. Claiming that she knows about the affair and herself as well. A large lump began to form in his throat as she continue reading the paper. Feeling that dark presented behind Eliza back just feeling Maria mocking her for sleeping with her own husband.

Yet, that not even the worst part.

Maria: Uh-oh! You made the wrong sucker a cuckold So time to pay the piper for the dress you stripped And hey, you can keep seeing’ that piece of shit If the price is right: if not I’m telling your man

Straight up blackmailing the young wife that if she doesn’t pay in the correct. This other wife would spill the details to her Alexander. In pure anger, she races out of her office but not without leaving confuse looks on her coworkers face’s. Nearly running toward Reynolds house as she proudly let herself to slam the door shut harshly. Racing toward upstairs as I saw James right before myself as I proceeded to slap him hard across the face. Shock but also hurt by this reaction as Eliza shove the letter in front of the man’s face.

Eliza: I hid the letter and I raced to his place Screamed

“How could you?!”

in his face He said: James No, Mam!!

Eliza:

Half dressed, apologetic. A mess, he looked

Pathetic, he cried:

James:

Please don’t go, mam!

Not caring if this man was even half naked or half dress in front of her. This affair is officially over but Reynolds grabbed Eliza’s hand. Not wanting to lose of what they have during the entire period of summer. Pulling herself away from this man with a look of anger spreading on her expression. Whimpering on the inside as Reynolds never saw this side of Eliza before. She was so kind and thoughtful toward him. Never forgetting her generosity to donated a large sum of money just for his daughter Susan. Holding Eliza in his arms once again but this married woman firmly pushes herself out of his reach. Tears were streaming down his face before on his knees. Betting this kind hearted woman to not leave him alone with his wife. Despite not knowing either he was serious or was all of this an act.

Eliza:

So was your whole story a setup?

James:

I don’t know about any letter!

Eliza:

Stop crying

God damnit, get up!

James:

I didn’t know any better

Eliza:

I am ruined...

Frantically pulling her hair while her own tears flooded her face. Realizing that consequences of what this affair leading to. This could ruin an entire innocent happy marriage and another marriage leading to a divorce in court. Both of them panicking as Maria has full control of them especially Eliza. Since she did indeed fallen trip into their spider webs of lies. The married man tries to persuade to stay with in his arms. Work before and show work again. Doesn’t need any other woman but her at the time being. Even it may cost him his life. Holding her into his arms once again while wiping her tears away with a soft touch.

Eliza / James:

Please don’t leave me with her, I’m helpless

(I am helpless—how could I do this?)

Just give her what he wants and you can have me

Eliza:

I don’t want you

James:

What?

Eliza:

I don’t want you

James/Eliza

Whatever you want (I don’t...)

If you pay,

You can

Stay!!!!

Eliza wanted to pull away but didn’t have the strength nor the energy to do so. Letting Reynolds cherish her one last time. Clinging onto him before letting the small kisses into full on make out. Which them on the bed once again. Just like how the first night when they first met. Eliza feeling regretful but yet a bit satisfied about this affair. Not sure why...she didn’t even know her self. They just want the pleasurable moment for one last time.

Eliza

Lord, show me how to

Say no to this

I don’t know how to

Say no to this

Cause the situation is helpless

And his body screaming “hell yes”

Lord, show me how to

Say no to this

Eliza/James

How can I say not to this?!

Eliza:

There is nowhere I can go?!

When his body on mine I do not say

Sharing a kisses from here and there from the lips, neck, and other sort etc. James notice a matching pendant around Eliza neck. Open by itself to see the man that Eliza is currently married to in made him freeze for a moment. Just staring at the picture on the day on this woman married her husband. Shaking lightly before shutting it quickly just wanting to get this over this. That picture suddenly began mocking him. Feeling this affair might put a tired on Eliza marriage with Alexander. Which he praise that doesn't happen. Which it's rare to have this emotions that he never had before.

Still both Reynolds and Eliza mind were screaming at them.Telling these two adults that “NO! This isn’t right” basic stuff. That both of them knew but decided to ignore it.

Eliza/James/The Fandom

Yes (Yes!)

Say no to this!

No!

Yes (Yes!)

Say no to this!

No!

Yes (Yes!)

Say no to this!

No!

Yes (Yes!)

Say no to this!

After this finally orderal, Eliza slowly and shamefully getting dressed as Reynolds lay in bed. Not looking at each others seem to be the best choice at the moment. Eliza wiped a few tears feeling so dirty and disgusted with herself. Her actions. Hopefully that she can put this in the past. And forget that it ever happen in the first place. Pulling out two envelope from the pocket of her dress. Both fill with crash.

Eliza:

Say no to this...

I don’t

Eliza/James:

Say no to this

Eliza:

There is nowhere I can go

The fandom:

Go, Go, Go

Right before her stood Maria Reynolds at the doorway with a little girl by her side. Apparently, this is their daughter that James mention before. Wearing a beautiful red dress that seem to share the same color and color of her husband shirt. Having a smug look on her face full aware of what just happened since this bedroom. But she could care less since its the money she need for a lawyer during a divorce court. But sweet little Eliza doesn’t need to know about that.

Maria:

So?

The other married woman sigh in defeat as she place the two full envelope on Maria hands. About thousands dollars in total. Looking down as the child stare at in confusion and curious of what was happening. But her innocent must be protected and so for that. The deed has been done and all of this affair is just hush hush. Racing out of the house in a rush with tears threatening to leave her eyes. Returning back to the orphanage in an hour as Theodosia, Martha, Dolley didn’t notice her return. Until hearing you close the door to her office and locking it. Her back was press against the wood before sliding down as she held her knee tightly. Tears spring down to the fabric of her dress before quietly whisper to herself.

“Nobody needs to know”

Nearly given up writing this fanfic but I made myself to finish. But yeah.. hope y'all enjoy

#hamilton #hamiltrash #Hamilton fanfic #Say no to this #elizabeth hamilton #Alexander Hamilton #John Laurens #Lafayette #Hercules Mulligan #romance #affair #drama #guilty #regrets #james reynolds #Maria Reynolds #Role-Reverse

27 notes · View notes

tomakeitbeautifultolive · 6 years

Note

Ok two months to go lets hear it: Who lives and who dies?

My death list is actually kind of short, but (probably) controversial:

The Mountain

Beric Dondarrion

Melisandre

Varys

Viserion

Cersei Lannister

Jaime Lannister

Jorah Mormont

Euron Greyjoy

Theon Greyjoy

The Night King

Sansa Stark

Jon Snow*

(*but he will be resurrected)

You’ll notice one very big name - perhaps the biggest - happens to be absent from my list. I’m not so sure I believe the leaks. *shrug*

My explanations and reasoning under the cut.

The Mountain

Of course, The Mountain is already dead, so this feels little redundant. I don’t think Cleganebowl is happening. The Mountain isn’t the same person Sandor had beef with, and Sandor isn’t the same person he once was. *shrug* I’m personally rooting for the Arya-takes-down-the-Mountain theory.

Varys

There’s a good chance that Melisandre is wrong about Varys’ death (like she’s wrong about well, almost everything):

“I have to die in this strange country, just like you.”

But we pair that with the line from Daenerys:

“If you ever betray me, I’ll burn you alive”

…and it seems to seal his fate (I don’t buy for a second he’s got allegiance to anyone but himself). Of course, there’s a chance it could be a line foreshadowing someone else’s death that’s been ‘leaked’. We’ll see!

Viserion

I could argue that Viserion is already dead… but since “(The Night King)’s done the same thing to Viserion that he did with Craster’s sons,” I assume he’s a dragon version of an other. That’s probably not too important, anyway.

I think Viserion will be taken down by Drogon, mirroring Viserys and Drogo *shrug* I love my parallels, don’t I?

Cersei Lannister

When you play the game of thrones, you win or you die. Eh, eh?

For as much as everyone cries “cliche!” about Jaime being the valonqar, imagine if all that foreshadowing was traded in for some shock value, and someone like Sansa does it. *shudders* Nah, man. I want Jaime to mirror himself - the Kingslayer/Queenslayer who took down both mad monarchs threatening to ignite King’s Landing in green flames - finally getting recognized for his act of heroism. That’s much more satisfying than a quick shock that has no buildup. But I suppose, there is a pretty good chance the valonqar is Euron.

(Though I do admit - I would actually love for Cersei Lannister to make it out of this alive, somehow)

Jaime Lannister

“I cannot die while Cersei lives. We will die together as we were born together.”

Both twins have weird lines like this. So, it’s fair to assume if one dies, they both die. And if one lives, they both live. So if Cersei is brought down, Jaime will be, too. How do I see it happening? Perhaps by one last (poisonous) kiss - wherein Brienne comes in to cradle him as the life drains from his body? I dunno. But after all, he wants to die in the arms of the woman he loves, and for better or worse - that’s Brienne.

Jorah Mormont

It’s been long speculated that in season 8, we’ll be seeing a ‘beloved’ character turn into a wight - and I think the best candidate is Jorah Mormont (keep in mind we’re talking show Jorah, who is leagues better than book Jorah).

Admittedly, I do notoriously give D&D more credit than like, anyone else around here. That said - I’m not sure the polar bear thing was entirely for “coolness” factor, like they claim. The moment I heard this line, followed by Jorah looming eerily over Beric…

I thought for sure we’d see this paid off in the very same episode. To me, it just seems wildly out of place and a waste of dialogue. I hope it’s some clever foreshadowing that we’re going to see a dead 'Bear’ of Bear Isle biting someone next season.

Of course, there is always a chance that the greyscale might play some sort of role in preventing Jorah from turning… I guess we’ll see!

Lastly, I’ve always been intrigued by Jon holding a Mormont shield during the BotB - I have a tendency to read too much into everything, I admit - but wouldn’t it be great if Jorah died saving Jon’s hide?

Euron Greyjoy & Theon Greyjoy

For as formidable as book Euron may be - I don’t see him living. This series just isn’t about evil prevailing. What I think he will do, however, is attack Jon and/or Daenerys at sea, perhaps as they try to flee the north. I’m one of those annoying people who thinks very few lines of dialogue are wasted in-show, and this one is a fucking thorn in my side:

I think Theon will succeed in taking down Euron (I think this scene is a great foreshadowing that he’s going to save house Greyjoy by saving Yara), but it will likely be at the cost of his own life. I suspect he’ll not only save Yara - but perhaps some members of his other house, too. After all, he’s a Greyjoy and he’s a Stark.

The Night King

Oh, this one is fun, isn’t it? I’m probably the only person who doesn’t want the Night King to die - but I’m pretty sure he will and that I know how it’ll happen. First, we’ll finally get to see Vladimír Furdík’s stuntwork paid off in the final season, which almost ensures there will be an epic showdown between Jon and the Night King.

But you shouldn’t want Jon to defeat him! (Or Daenerys, for that matter!) Why?

“The gods hate kinslayers, even when they kill unknowing.”

This quote is specifically told to Jon by Ygritte when she recounts the tale of Bael the Bard. Interestingly, Bael the Bard heavily mirrors Rhaegar x Lyanna. And what also happens to mirror Lyanna, is how Sam and Jon become friends. Jon comes to his rescue as he’s getting his ass whooped by his fellow black brothers - just like his momma coming to Howland Reed’s aid. Both Jon and Lyanna go out of their way to further humiliate the tormenters, too.

I predict the Night King will disarm Jon Snow and in this crucial moment, and that’s when Sam the Slayer will thrust Heartsbane through his back (perhaps melted down into more wieldable daggers by Gendry?), Howland Reed-style, saving Jon’s life and frankly, blowing everyone’s minds.

Because after all…

“Everything that happens will be something that you’ve seen before.”

Buuuut it’s going to be about as satisfying as Arthur Dayne’s demise - as we’re going to learn of the Night King’s history, and perhaps that his death marked not only the death of the wights and white walkers - but all of Craster’s sons, perhaps wiping out a whole misunderstood race.

‘A villain is the hero of the other side’, after all - and if you’re familiar with my theory that the Night King is the one using his greenseeing powers to manipulate the visions in the flames that the followers of R'hllor see… then this line by Beric might foreshadow his death:

And that our heroes, the 'enemy’, will win.

Sansa Stark

Before anyone comes for me, there’s a fair amount of eerie foreshadowing - at least in the books. If the season 7 script leaks are to be believed, Sansa might still be the 'lone wolf’ she warned against last season, distancing herself from her family out of jealousy or paranoia.

The way I see it going down, though, (if it does at all) the Stark girls will mirror their direwolves - and Sansa just might die in her sister’s place, saving her life.

Jon Snow

First, let’s look at the conversation between Jon and Melisandre prior to the Battle of the Bastards:

“Any advice?”

“Don’t lose.”

“If I do, if I fall don’t bring me back.”

“I’ll have to try.”

“I’m ordering you not to bring me back.”

“I am not your servant, Jon Snow.”

“You’re in my camp. I’m the commander.”

“I serve the Lord of Light. I do what he commands.”

“How do you know what he commands?”

“I interpret his signs as well as I can.”

“If the Lord didn’t want me to bring you back, how did I bring you back? I have no power. Only what he gives me and he gave me you. Why? I don’t know. Maybe you’re only needed for this small part of his plan and nothing else. Maybe he brought you here to die again.”

Other than that, we’ve got some fucked up lines from Sansa:

(Thanks, Sansa. Great job.)

As well as Beric:

Alternatively, there is some amazing book foreshadowing that Jon will live.

Why include in the story Beric has come back from the dead multiple times, at all? Why tell us that each time he comes back, he’s a bit less of himself? He’s not a major character. Is it all just for 'flavor’ - or are we being groomed to see it happen again to someone we love?

And how bittersweet would that be - seeing Jon come back a second time, but not quite the man he used to be - the one we all grew to love.

I love the theory that Jon Snow is Dany’s mount, treason, and fire for love - and that she’s the one who commits treason against him, by possibly demanding he be brought back 'against his will’ (though, considering he’s a father-to-be and potential newlywed, I don’t think he’ll gripe about it as much in season 8 as he would’ve in season 6.)

When Jon died the first time - I thought for sure he’d come back in some blaze of glory. That they’d try to burn his body, but he’d have this epic 'Unburnt’ moment, like Dany (lol). I’d like to see Dany wake a dragon a second time with some sort of similar funeral pyre that she walks into… except that two people walk out instead of one.

I know, I know. *adjusts tinfoil hat*

But Sam Tarly happens to agree with me:

Always.

Beric Dondarrion

Considering the man gave his life long ago for Catelyn to become Lady Stoneheart in the books, I think his entire purpose for still kickin’ around in Season 8 is to give someone the 'Last Kiss’. Not really a unique idea, no. Popular candidates tend to be Sandor (after all, he tells him 'We will meet again’), Daenerys, or one of the Stark kids. But my money’s on Jon.

Melisandre

I’m an atheist (like GRRM), and therefore, I more or less despise Melisandre for basically convincing what used to be a good man to burn his daughter alive. That’s some Abraham and Isaac shit right there (and that shit better happen in the books because it’s powerful AF commentary and I’m here for it).

All that said, what I’d love to happen with Melisandre is to see her realize her god isn’t real (assuming the Night King has been messing with her visions), and have a personality crisis/breakdown. Afterward, if my theory about Jon happens to be true, she’ll play a role in bringing him back, perhaps even lending her life in the process. Buuuut I wouldn’t mind Gendry’s future wife avenging his cousin’s death and closing her 'blue eyes’ forever.

As for the rest…

People I’m unsure will live or die:

Drogon 🤞

Ghost 🤞

Nymeria 🤞

Davos Seaworth 🤞

Tyrion Lannister 🤞

Sandor Clegane 🤞

Grey Worm 🤞

Bronn

Ned Umber

Alys Karstark

People I think will live:

Samwell Tarly

Gilly

Daenerys Targaryen

Arya Stark

Bran Stark

Little Sam

“Boatbaby”

Rhaegal

Gendry

Missandei

Jon Snow (resurrected)

#spoilers #got spoilers #not really #but just in case #got endgame #my best gueses

9 notes · View notes

decadentrpg-blog · 6 years

Photo

WELCOME EMILY, YOU’VE BEEN ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF HELOISE DELACOUR

Admins Note: Heloise was certainly a difficult choice to make but after much assessment, I want to say that I absolutely adore what you’ve brought to the table! From build up of her background to every little historical reference that was placed within your application, it cohesively created this duality that Heloise has! I’ve enjoyed every interaction she has as well as the clarity and rationale behind her thinking! Your faceclaim request for Virginia Gardner has been approved. Congratulations on your acceptance again, please make sure to head your way to the checklist and submit your account within the next 24 hours!

Out of Character

Name / Alias: Emily

Pronouns: She/Her

Age: Twenty-two

Timezone: GMT.

In Character Application

Full Name: Heloise Delacour

Sexuality: Lesbian.

You like girls. No, that’s wrong. You love girls. You love the smoothness of their skin. You love their gentle curves, their bodies like oceans, refreshing and divine. You love stroking their hair as you lie between sweat-soaked sheets, curling it around your fingertips. You love sharing lipstick shades so it won’t get too messy when you kiss and the sound beaded dresses make when they hit the ground. Most of all, you love who you become around them. Bursting at the seams with euphoria, without a trace of shakiness in your footsteps, you unveil the creature you fought so hard to become - self-assured and valiant. You always slipped into her without thinking about it, knowing instinctively, that this was right. This was who you were supposed to be.

Gender/Pronouns: Cis-female, she/her

Hogwarts House: Gryffindor.

The hat was adamant. They wanted you in Gryffindor. They wanted you to learn to harness your own roar, the find power in your sort of bravery - perhaps even to tame the brasher instincts of your peers, to calm the storm inside of them. Not every kind of bravery favours the bold, the defiant, the loud. There are different kinds of bravery. The courage to carry on when the chains around your neck drag you to the ground. The strength to try and try and try. The valour in turning yourself into an anchor, a steady weight for the rest of the world to ground themselves on. There are all sorts of bravery in this world, each as useful, each as needed, as the last. Children, yourself included, see so much, but so little at the same time.

You didn’t glimpse the potential in yourself. You wouldn’t for many years yet.

But the hat knew.

You pleaded for Hufflepuff, knowing you’d be able to carve a home out of the house. The world underestimated badgers, sneering at their perceived lack of intelligence, wit or ambition. You didn’t see that at all. You saw steadiness, a bedrock to build a person upon. It wasn’t a leap of faith. But society couldn’t be built around those who flew. Someone had to be waiting, down below, rooted to the earth, ready to catch falling angels.

The hat laughed.

“Better be…” Panic rose in your chest, a knot tightening inside of you. “GRYFFINDOR.”

They weren’t unkind to you. But you were the fawn in the pride of lions, the hovering figure in the background, the mute who never could make herself heard. Years later, with your personhood more fully attached, half of you wistfully wishes you could go back and do it better. Do it again. And yet, in your heart, you know there’s no value in looking backwards. You must journey on.

Head canons:

Trigger warnings for violence, war, alcoholism and mentions of abuse.

I. la petite fille

Your father - and you only have the confidence to say this now you’re a fledgling, grown to use her own voice - always cared far too much about what people thought. Cream of French society, darling of the elite, a career-hungry politician intent on climbing the ladder. Ironically, the sunshine in your soul can be traced directly back to him. And yet, where yours is woven into the very essence of your being, a warm touch to steady a storm, an easiness to still a monster, a brightness to diminish the darkness, his is a mask, a choking falseness. It was that, more than anything else, that scared you. He changed before your very eyes - shaking hands and kissing cheeks one second - to plotting behind their back the next. Nothing about him was real. He slipped between your fingers, never a solid thing to hang onto.

(The feeling, you know, is mutual. You were a grand disappointment. Too timid to follow in his footsteps and too honest to lie. You’re mostly strangers now, each unable to understand the other).

Your mother you know a little better. An English rose, she fell for your father’s charms one summer, a fling that never was supposed to turn into a marriage. You were the bump that interrupted those plans, the shame that would have befallen her good name. Both parties were hastily married and that was that. You’ve always wondered if she blamed you for it. Always been too afraid to ask. Your mother, you know, was miserable, far far away from home, shackled to a man she barely liked, forced to play the part of politicians wife. When she played it well, there was harmony in the household. But if she slipped up…all hell broke loose. And her, with her love of expensive wine and flirting with other people’s husbands, did mess up. You never witnessed the war inside of your father unfold, merely lived its after effects. Silently, you’d pull a blanket over your mother’s quivering frame and give your father his favourite cigar.

(As you grew, you became rather good at predicting the ticking time bombs. So before the storm ravaged, you nearly always scrambled to safety, grabbing your teddy bear and retreating to the back of the wardrobe. You never found a secret world in the back of there, but you did find safety - and that was a comfort in and of itself).

Peacemaker, your father would sometimes say with affection, your mother with scorn. You’d gulp and nod silently, opinions kept to yourself. Over time, a survival instinct became a pattern and from a pattern into a habit. Such things are hard to shake.

Ii. maison choisie

Your mother hailed from London’s big smoke and your father made Paris his home, so you’ve always been accustomed to cities - you could even say it’s in your blood. But nowhere ever felt like home more than your Grand-Mere’s home a stone’s throw from Amiens. Reluctantly, with great effort, your father would make the bi-annual privilege there, dragging your mother in tow. You never had to be forced, you galloped ahead, a country girl at heart. There was something so liberating about Amiens, especially in the summer, where the line between the fields and sky was impossible trace and wildflowers bloomed. Your grandmother was kinder than your parents, the only one who could pull you out of your shell - but even then, only when you were alone. More a hedgewitch than practiced individual, she used to set you upon a stool as she practiced her potions, entrusting you with the responsibility of stirring from time to time. She was the one who taught you that magic had more than rigid purpose, that it would be as beautiful as life itself.

She also taught you a second, valuable lesson.

You remember the very first muggle you met. You remember them because they waved joyfully as you stepped into the town square - and knew your father by reputation, your Grand-Mere by face. Your father, ever the diplomat, turned his face away, pretending not to have heard. You, bashfully, didn’t meet their eyes either. It was only later, when your parents had been placated by a bottle of wine or two, that your Grand-mere took you aside.

“Why didn’t you wave back?” Dumbstruck, you look for somewhere to scurry away and hide. Gently, she took your hand into her own. “I won’t hurt you chérie.”

“Maman et Papa didn’t.” And you never were awfully comfortable around strangers, bashfulness seizing control of you.

“They were wrong to.” Bopping your nose, your grand-mere drew giggles from you. “They didn’t wave because he was…” her voice strained over the English word. “A muggle. Have they told you not to talk to muggles?”

You shook your head.

“Don’t let them. There will be some, especially when you go to school, who tell you not to talk to witches who have muggle parents. You musn’t let them order you around. No one is any better or lesser because of the blood in our veins. Even muggles…they’re not witches. But they’re not the enemy. After all, if I never spoke to a muggle, I’d never speak to anyone! Never forget that.”

You promised you wouldn’t. You haven’t since.

Iii. armes de guerre Ultimately, it was war that drove you away from your beloved France and your cherished Grand-mere, who refused to stand down and flee when the German troops overran Amiens. You like to imagine she would not take a cowards way out, apparating whilst the others were rats in a barrel, trapped by the advance. You like to imagine she fought to defend her farm with every trick up her sleeve. You like to imagine she remained strong and valiant until the very end. But you’ll never know. The war snatched her from you, her story lost to the wind. All you had left was an owl from the French ministry and the personal condolences of the French Minister La Magie.

It took you a very long time to summon the courage to return. And even then, you couldn’t do it alone. Kenshin stepped in without being asked, the year after you left Hogwarts, stability at your side as you confronted the ruins of the happiest parts of your childhood. Violence had ravaged the landscape, scarring those who survived. Left with nothing, you saw the hallows of hunger in their sunken cheeks and poverty wrecked on their bones. Beauty had perished and been left to die. But in the ruins of her farm, you saw all was not lost. The Peach trees were still rooted, their bounty just as sweet. The goats, against the odds, made it out of the shelling alive. The old stool you had once assisted your grandmother had merely cracked, not splintered. Life went on - and through the cracks of darkness, light emerged.

You saw something of yourself in that light.

A hopeful creature, timidly taking her first steps into the world. A passionate believer in the strength of goodness, in victory and vanquish over evil. That progress, ultimately, would triumph. That even in the face of blasphemy, there is room for beauty, for brightness. The trick is in finding it and nourishing it, so that it may grow.

From seed to sapling to great oak.

The spark within yourself ignited that day. You felt your grandmother’s presence and smiled. You mourned, not in sadness, but in joy - for all the happiness that had been, for all that would yet come.

The world treads down on optimists, mocking their faith. But you’ve learnt there’s courage in that kind of relentless determination. That day, you felt its whispers in your soul. That day, you swore to let it go free.

Iv. soldat improbable The time that followed ‘The Great War’ was supposed to be the long peace. If you look with hooded eyes, you’d find that in the cityscape of New York. Illicit drinking. Parties that last until dawn. Jazz bands. Woman’s emancipation. There is so much beauty, so much progress. But squint harder - and you’d find an underground war, a cold one, lurking just below the surface. It’s cause is more just than any muggle one ever fought. It isn’t a battle between great powers, princes and their cousins. It’s between right and wrong, progress and past, egalitarianism and inequality.

You know you’re not a likely candidate to fight in it. Most overlook you, sneering at your daintiness, soft smiles and open heart. They should understand that it’s what makes you strong, too. All you want is some small part in this larger battle, to be a part of the greater good. More than anything else, you’re a visionary, able to picture a world beyond this hatred. If you can see the brightness, you can be the brightness, a bedrock for those wearier than you, a guide for those who might come in your direction. You’re no warrior, not in the conventional sense, but not every battle should be fought with a weapon. Some need softer tools. You could be that person.

It is the sum of your duties with Dahlia. You see yourself in her, the girl you were but a few years ago, timid and unsure of the power in her own voice, but possessing a rosy heart. She deserves better. You long to show her that, to share your brightness and certainty in betterness, to pull her from the den of snakes and away from the Pride Society. You’re not asking her to fight, for the Coalition, for you…never. You simply want to help her. You would do anything - give her the means to runaway, a safe roof to shelter under, because you long to see her flourish. You’re just so afraid of failure…of failing her, your duty and yourself. The powers against you are overwhelming, those who wield the weapons lethal. The horrors she confesses terrify you. Light, as bright as it is, can be snuffed out. That is your greatest fear where Dahlia is concerned.

V. Coup de main As fun you’ll admit the parties Wren and Kenshin drag you out to are, you couldn’t carve a life out of them. Pleasure is for hedonists - and you do not count yourself among their ranks. When you found your own voice, the grit beneath porcelain skin, you were determined that it should count. You sought purpose in yourself, a way to matter. Almost as if you were trying to prove yourself…to yourself.

You found clarity in the most unlikely of places. A non-descriptive building in Queens - that would appear empty to an unsuspecting muggle. It’s purpose only became clear when you stepped inside, finding an overworked and overwhelmed refugee agency. In the aftermath of the great war, the creation of a dozen new states in Europe, thousands of wizards chose to emigrate instead, heading to the United States in search of a better life.

It’ll be tough work, the supervisor warned, staring you up and down, disdainfully. You bit your lip. Old habits die hard.

I’m tougher than I look. Promise. Your voice rang with clarity, in how true that statement had become.

You began volunteering on a trial basis. You distributed donations and held shaky people in your arms. You played with children and made puppets dance. After a fortnight, you began to offer your services as a translator, hoping to connect people into the interior of the US. A little while after that, you suggested you could be used by the organisation at large, rather than ad-hoc.

You felt a rush in your chest, advocating for yourself. You felt strong and brave and…right.

VI. bizarreries personnelles

Here are the little things that make you, you.

You never broke the habit of walking on your tiptoes, a legacy left from a childhood full of ballet dancing. Slender limbs, porcelain skin, your teacher used to sigh and wish you centre stage. Bashfully, you refused, your cheeks darkening. The spotlight was never yours to claim.

You cannot cook without making a mess. In your presence, the kitchen comes a bomb sight, ravaged by war. Nose flour-stained, fingers sticky, you chase Kenshin around the kitchen. You always catch him. He always allows himself to get caught.

Your pastries are infamous, light and puffy, the sort only the french know how to make. You refine your recipes with magic and tap your nose whenever anyone asks for their secrets. (Later, in fine ink, you pen them a letter, containing the details).

You despise British food. You ate dutifully at Hogwarts, too shy to even dream of asking for an alternative. Toad in the hole. Pies. Casseroles. Blegh.

You bit your fingernails until you were fifteen years old. Your mother enchanted them after that, exasperated at your lack of self-control. The spell has long worn off, but the manicure never lasts long. It’s a nervous tick.

You used to chew your hair. You threw off that habit by twelve.

Birthdays are your favourite times of the year. You take great pride in the gifts you give friends, a thoughtful gesture behind each one. You do, however, despise your own birthday. Being at the centre of attention makes you uncomfortable, you’d much rather spread and share the joy. Luckily, everyone’s learnt not to throw you surprise birthday parties. Instead, you have small, intimate gatherings.

(You and Kenshin have a ritual. A cupcake at midnight as eve becomes day.)

You’re hopeless at keeping plants alive. There isn’t a green bone - or thumb - in your body. You failed herbology miserably.

But you’re incredibly attentive when it comes to writing in your diary, daily and in french, to prevent eavesdropping eyes. A habit you haven’t shaken since your days in Gryffindor.

Your patronus is a lamb. An individual with a lamb patronus has a sort of natural innocence about them, and have a very serene disposition. They are kind to most, though they tend to have a difficult time reaching out and expressing themselves. They have a shy aspect of them that is not only social, but inner, which makes them hesitant to do many things. That said, they are very patient and calm creatures, which allow them to be workable with this nature.

You talk too much when you’re nervous. Far too much. About things that have nothing to do with anything. The weather. The latest show that opened on Broadway. The dance craze everyone’s talking about. Whether you should get a bob. You blabber, filling the space with…words. It’s endearing to most, but you despise it in yourself.

Your wand is 9 ½”, french-made and slim. Beech and Unicorn Hair. “The true match for a beech wand will be, if young, wise beyond his or her years, and if full-grown, rich in understanding and experience. Beech wands perform very weakly for the narrow-minded and intolerant. When properly matched, the beech wand is capable of a subtlety and artistry not seen in any other wood, hence its lustrous reputation.”

Languages are your forte. You have a knack for wrapping your tongue around them, inheriting a little of your father’s silver-tongued mantle. French is your mother tongue, but you’ve added English, Spanish, Italian and a pinch of Latin to the mix.

When you’re making a bold declaration or gesture, you rehearse the words in your mind the night before, like a politician preparing for a speech. You muse over the most effective way to get your point across, the comfort a person will be most receptive to, or whether it’s better just to hold someone and let them cry.

Connection expansion:

I. meilleur ami (Note: I’m happy to change all of this if the Kenshin player disagrees, this is merely my interpretation).

“Mon Frere…” Kenshin catches your grin. Deliberately, his mouth forms an ‘o’. “Ma sœur” You wince at the deliberately butchered pronunciation, but smile nonetheless. He’s always had a particular knack for that, drawing the happiness out of you. And you for him. The only label that fits your description is that of platonic soulmate. Or big brother. For truly, the lines between friendship and family have blurred, that you can’t tell them apart. Certainly, he feels more like family than your own blood ever did.

You met on your tenth day at Hogwarts, in the middle of Herbology class. Devil’s snare wrapped around your hand, you panicked, but were too shy to raise you concerns, suffering in silence. Where few did, Kenshin noticed you - and calmed you down with that bluntness of his. Before you knew it, you were smiling, then laughing and then free. You’ve been attached at the hip since - and shall be, until death do you part. The years did little to change the pair of you. Where some friends grow apart, you grew together, slotting like two jigsaw puzzle pieces. By third year, you were spending Christmas together, Kenshin sensing your unspoken reluctance to go back to France and face the holidays with your parents. After your first one together, you confessed the truth, honesty no one had even known. But most of all, he brought light into his life - different to yours, more brazen and bold. Like two twinned suns, strung across the sky. He is your confidante, secret keeper, joker, dance partner and now, roommate.

The latter made sense. When the two of you ended up in New York at the same time (it’s impossible to imagine the two of you oceans apart, impossible and terrible and dreadful), it made sense for the pair of you to find a two-bed apartment in Manhattan and make it your home. You are as compatible roommates as you are friends.

And, for the first time, he made a house a home.

II. le fruit interdit (Again, I’m happy to alter things dependent on plotting w/ Prosperina’s player) You shouldn’t want to kiss her. If you are the doe, she is the wolf - a huntress determined to strike clean. In your heart, you know you should hate that dynamic, as you know you should despise her - resent the intimidation that rises through your bones, abhore the uncertainty she makes you feel.. You should be afraid. Very afraid.

And in so many ways, you are. You’re scared of what your attraction to her says about you, now that you are both girls grown, living with the choices you make as adults. You aren’t school children anymore, you aren’t praying to be noticed, doodling hearts with your names encased in it. You’re fearful of what might happen if you find yourselves alone, in a dark - or a light - room. But you’re more frightened, in a strange way, of nothing happening at all.

With Prosperina, there are so many unspoken anxieties, so many things you can’t possibly wrap your head around, that you can’t possibly know. Why she notices you now. When you began to crave the burn. If the risk is worth a moments ecstasy. How beauty could wear such thorns.

You know, now, how Eve felt, in the Garden of Eden. Just one bite, the snake hissed. Just one kiss, Prosperina whispers. You have no wish to shed your wings and toss yourself from Paradise’s gate. But she’s just as beautiful as any angel you’ve ever gazed upon.

In Character Paragraph:

Thursday night, 9pm sharp, the Yale Club. Dress elegantly. Heloise didn’t need to glance down at the invitation to know its contents, her heart having memorised them ten times over, skipping a beat each time it paused at a cursive. Even Prosperina’s writing was beautiful. She would have liked to say that the invitation was unexpected, out of the blue and had been firmly rejected. Yet, since she distastes lies, she could not.

Heloise had, however, made an attempt or two to excuse herself. Sending an owl in return, she had outlined her disapproval of the Pride Society and its galas in no uncertain terms. Prosperina had take an age to respond - deliberately, Heloise supposed, to make her nerves hop and jump. When she had, Heloise could almost taste her tone. It’s not one of those. It’s for charity. Don’t you support charity? She had caved. Heloise couldn’t be sure if that was strength or weakness, good or bad.

Three days later, another letter had arrived. Wear pink. It matches the blush on your face.

Stepping into the room, Heloise steeled herself, a picture of defiance in angel-white, beads reflecting the light back.

Not so long ago, she would have cowered, a ghostly slip of a thing, trembling in the corner. Glass of champagne stitched to her hand, she would have sipped until someone had taken pity on her - and even then, she might have fled. That worked under the assumption she plucked the courage to attend at all. Time sandpapered everyone, some for the better, others for the worse. Heloise liked to think she took after the former.

The first eye she caught was from across the room, her gaze instantly drawn to the slip of a girl shrouded by demons, unable to do anything but stare from her cage. Dahlia. It hurt to see her here, to see the shackles bound and to know she was powerless to help. To approach her, to take her hands into her own and wrap her arms around her shoulders was to betray her newfound friend, to expose her doubts to the world. There was cruelty in watching her suffer - but there was greater cruelty in taking a hammer to the foundations below her feet. That wasn’t Heloise’s job. Hers was to encourage Dahlia to flutter her own wings, to learn how to fly. All in good time. Smiling softly across the room, she let her face say what her tongue couldn’t. Stay strong, keep the faith.

The second pair were Prosperina’s - appearing from nowhere, sneaking up behind. Departing from conventions and norms, she didn’t bother with small-talk. “You look ravishing. But not as pretty as you would have had in pink.”

Tongue-tied, Heloise searched for a response. No one had the power to shrink her anymore, now that she had freed her voice from its restraints. And yet, that didn’t mean anymore wit had returned to it. In times like these, she prayed for Kenshin’s presence at her side, always ready with a sharp retort, the sort that drew him closer to someone. Or even Wren, brazen and bold, who spoke without thought. You don’t want to impress her! One voice screamed.Not like you imagined you might, a lifetime ago.

And yet, a little bit of her did.

Heloise spurned her interest. But a little bit of her didn’t want to do without it either.

“I - Thank you. You look…” Staring at Prosperina for the first time, Heloise felt the breath be stolen from her lungs. Divine. Enchanting. “Like a million bucks.” Slanting her voice into an American accent for comedic effect, she immediately regretted her choice no sooner had it been said. “And this…it’s certainly big. Very big. I suppose that’s good. The more people you can fit in, the more donations you can collect for charity.”

Prosperina laughed. Heloise was never sure if she was being laughed at or with. She preferred to think it was the latter.

“The committee had a few reservations. Something about…vermin control. The guest list is rather exclusive, you see.”

Confusion flashed across her face. It wasn’t as if New York was a stranger to rodents…but something about her tone, about the look on her face…made it clear that it wasn’t animals she was referring to. Without noticing, Heloise had become a player in the game. The smile froze on her face. “I sure hope that isn’t a reference to the architects who built the place. Or the perfectly nice people going about their business on the floor below. They’re not doing any harm.”

“Ah yes, the No-Maj’s, as our Yank friends love to say.”

Heloise tensed on the mention of that word. She despised it. No-Maj. So…derogatory. And rather rude. As if they didn’t count as people, or deserve respect, on the merit of something they didn’t have - and had no choice in having. “I hate that term. I hate - you shouldn’t talk about them like that. Nobody should. They’re hardly hurting anyone. And technically, this is their territory so really we should - be respectful.” Exhaling heavily, she steadied herself.

“Oh,” Prosperina leaned in, all smiles now, tucking a strand of loose hair behind her ear. “You’re such a doll. I was only playing. But I can be nice, if you ask nicely.” Her touch felt like electricity, the sort of chemistry that couldn’t be duplicated or faked. When it was real, it was real. “I’ll go fetch us expensive champagne to make amends.” Half-purr, she broke off and Heloise dropped her gaze. “Pink Champagne, I think.”

Cheeks deepening into rosy-red, Heloise watched her depart, wishing she could look away.

Extras:

Pinterest Board: X

#lsrpg #lsrp #hprp #hprpg #harry potter rp #accepted

2 notes · View notes

viralhottopics · 8 years

Text

Dear White, Christian Trump Supporters: We Need To Talk

Plenty of pundits keep telling us progressives that we didnt listen to them in the heartland to you of the white working class, to you of conservative Christianity.

Actually, I grew up as one of you. Ive listened to you my whole life, but I dont think I know how to understand you at all.

I suppose now youd consider me part of the so-called liberal elite. Im a west coast university professor with a Ph.D. and almost 30 years of teaching experience. But Im the daughter of a Southern Baptist, working-class pipe fitter at a paper mill in a small, conservative town in northwest Georgia.

My parents did not go to college (my father finally earned a degree after hed retired from the paper mill). Only one of my four grandparents finished high school. I studied hard, got a scholarship, kept studying, kept working, and I moved into the white collar middle class.

My white conservative Christian upbringing had told me that was the American Dream to work hard and succeed. I did, and I feel youre holding it against me now that I no longer share your views. I think you must imagine the liberal elite as East Coast, Ivy League-educated, trust fund babies completely out of touch with how most people live.

Sure, some faculty members grew up with money. Some went to Ivy League schools. But a lot of us professors were you working class kids who did whatever it took to get a college education. Along the way, a lot of us developed progressive ideas, not out of our privilege, but out of our own experiences of discrimination, struggle, and oppression.

We read and argued and wrote and rewrote. We got peer-reviewed, over and over and over. Our ideas are held to incredibly high, rigorous standards, and so, when we speak we do so carefully, thoughtfully, with nuance, and with openness because sometimes we are also wrong. But because weve studied hard and held ourselves up to professional standards, we really do know a lot about what were talking about, and we have something to offer in a real conversation across our differences (including the East Coast Ivy Leaguers who arent as out of touch as you may think). But I dont think you want to hear us or me.

You tell me I need to get over Trumps election and stop being a sore loser. But politics is not a sport. We dont choose teams and simply cheer ours on to victory. My beloved Atlanta Falcons lost the Super Bowl, and, painful though that was, I will get over it. It hurts, but I wont protest, march, write letters, or otherwise resist the outcome, even if we discover New Englands balls were deflated. Its a game, but its not life or death.

This election, however, is exactly that. Perhaps you can tell me to get over it because you do not have to worry that Trump will appoint a Supreme Court justice that could play a role in invalidating your marriage. If Congress passes and Trump signs the First Amendment Defense Act, you probably wont have to worry that a bakery, restaurant, or hotel might legally deny you service. You dont have to worry about being stranded at an airport and refused admission to the U.S. because of the country youre from or the religion you practice. You dont have to worry about having your family divided across the world with a simple signature on an executive order.

You say you are aggrieved because you have not achieved what you think you deserve or you think some less deserving other has taken it. Despite having moved into the middle class, I have spent my career teaching about and advocating for labor unions, a living wage, affordable childcare, social security, affordable healthcare, accessible higher education. Progressives are actually the ones who support the economic programs and policies that could make a difference for the working class.

You have a right to be aggrieved, but I fear you are targeting the wrong people. Low paying jobs, job insecurity, companies moving work overseas, low benefits, little vacation these are the results of decades of policies that benefit the truly wealthy those whose wealth depends not on the labor of their hands but on their ability to exploit the production of poorly paid laborers. The problem is not that immigrants have taken your jobs or drained money from the safety net. The problem is that the system of wealth sets workers against one another so they do not target the real economic power that limits their work and financial security.

You say you want progressives to listen to you. Then prioritize truth. This election was filled with fake news, shared widely on Facebook, and this administration already has begun to create a language of alternative facts to misinform and mislead. If you want to talk, offer evidence, real evidence based on verifiable data and reliable sources, not wishful imaginings or fabricated Breitbart stories. An internet meme is not an informed and legitimate point of argument that facilitates dialogue. Weve reached a point where youd rather believe an overt lie if it supports a belief you already hold than pursue the truth if it might challenge your currently held belief.

The Bible tells us God is a God of truth and the truth will set us free. Yet you chose someone who lies with impunity. I want to understand how you choose to ignore the evidence that is right in front of your eyes photos of the crowds at two different inaugurations, for example. How do you accept what is proven to be a lie? How do you support someone who, rather than correct the record, doubles down on his lies?

Especially, how do you do this in the name of the God of truth? Before the election I saw one of you whod written as an evangelical Christian in support of Trump that God can use anyone. So help me understand why you thought God could use a man whod said hed never asked God for forgiveness, who serially committed adultery, who said he could grab women by the genitals, who cheated contractors and workers, but you didnt think God could use a woman who is a Christian, a lifelong Methodist and who, from the heart, quotes the Bible and John Wesley (when Trump didnt even know how to say Second Corinthians, which he called Two Corinthians, and when asked for his favorite Bible verse struggled to name one until he landed on an eye for an eye. And you know what Jesus said about that one).

I know youve been offended that progressives have called you racist for voting for Trump. I understand that. You dont see yourself as racist. But you did knowingly vote for someone who insulted Latinos, Blacks, Muslims, and Jews. And women. And LGBTQ people. And people with disabilities. Help me understand how that squares with the notion of Gods love for all people.

Can you really imagine Jesus using the words Trump did about these groups of people? How would you characterize voting for someone who is overtly racist? Help me understand how you align your Christian perspective with his racism, misogyny, homophobia, Islamophobia, and antisemitism.

Im afraid that what you want is a nation that conforms to your interpretation of the Bible. Thats where we really run into trouble because that would require you to force your particular conservative Christian beliefs on everyone else. I dont understand how people who want to claim religious liberty for themselves are so unwilling to give it to everyone, which is actually the premise of true religious liberty.

You say you want a Christian nation, but our founders were clear that was never their goal. In fact, the Constitution goes to great lengths to protect the government from religion and religion from government. I also get the sense that you think people are not Christians if they arent Christian in the same way as you. But cant we find some common ground? Cant we agree that all people should be free to practice their religion or practice no religion and should be safe from coercion based on religion? Cant we agree that we share values of love, kindness, respect, and community and then try to live those with each other? Do you really think a Christian, especially a biblical literalist, can want a wall built?

The Bible is clear about how we are to treat foreigners among us no matter how they got here. What if the Egyptians had built a wall before Mary and Joseph fled from King Herod? Our Christian story starts with a refugee family. Can we not practice our shared Christian values with immigrants and refugees coming to our country?

Cant we find common ground on issues like, say, abortion? I think we could have a common goal of lowering abortion rates. After all, you will never end abortions. Maybe you can end the safe, legal ones, but, one way or another, women will still have abortions. They will just be more likely to die from them.

And heres where I think dealing with facts is crucial to find common ground. We know that abortion rates are lower worldwide when there is no global gag order. We also know that what is most successful in lowering abortion rates is access to contraception, accurate sex education, and personal and economic empowerment for women.

To cling to overturning Roe v. Wade as the only way to end abortions is a fantasy based on ideology rather than medical science and social science, and it flies in the face of the evidence for what is successful. So the real question is are you more interested in actual effectiveness in lowering abortion rates or ideological purity? We can lower abortion rates together but not by denying women choices over their own bodies. We can be effective together by listening to the data and working together to ensure all women have access to contraception, education, and social and economic resources. Are you willing to have that conversation?

Ive heard some of you say that well just have to agree to disagree, but thats a problem. You see, were not talking about ideas here. Were talking about actual human lives. If we were talking about predestination or modes of baptism or premillennialism, Id say, sure, lets agree to disagree. The stakes are pretty low. But if were talking about the rights of people to access housing, clean water and air, and healthy food or the possibility of a nuclear arms race or discrimination written into law or women losing basic life-saving health screenings, or young black men being incarcerated disproportionately, or Native peoples having their sacred sites desecrated and their water poisoned, or Muslim people being targeted for their faith, then the stakes are much higher, and I cannot simply agree to disagree.

Thats why Im writing you now. We need to talk, and I dont know how to talk to you anymore. I need to know, is it more important to you to win than to do good? Or can we build coalitions? Listen to science? Rely on real evidence? Be effective? Put the needs and rights of all others above ideologies? Can we live the love of God we claim? You want me to hear and understand you. I get that. I also want you to hear and understand the rest of the world that is not you or your kind. Because they too are Gods people and therefore are in the circle of those whom we must love. You taught me that when I was a child. If we can agree on that now, we have a place to start.