#i feel so lost and helpless

[no-one-hears-me]

I really truly genuinely do not want to let him go

[morbidxmommy]

.

[t-rina]

We have received word that the DMA has moved. It is now days away from Ni'Var, Titan and Earth.

[1singulargrape]

Idk where the story of the frog turning into a prince after getting a kiss comes from but yk... This with Yuuji and Blobkuna

[longagoitwastuesday]

Kusakabe, dear, you're too beautiful to be saying that kind of stuff

[bethanydelleman]

A few months ago, the symphony in my city went bankrupt and closed permanently. I was shocked. My SIL and I had season's tickets and were preparing to go to the first concert that very week. I had extra tickets so my kids could go to Music and Magic later in the season. The year before, I had brought my oldest for the first time to see Cirque du Symphony (Cirque du Soleil + symphony) and he loved it. I'm not sure he loved the music but he enjoyed the performance.

I'd been going since a friend in university gave me her extra tickets. Back then I could go for about $25 as a student and sit anywhere in the house. My SIL and I aren't rich, we paid for tickets in the back of the mezzanine. We weren't terribly cultured, we went to the Pops series which had dancing and other performances, not the Classic series. But I loved it, I love when the music goes straight through your body and fills you up. I miss that feeling. You can't get it with pre-recorded music. Now I can't have it again unless I want to drive for hours.

I just feel profoundly sad about it. I went to the bankruptcy meeting and I felt so betrayed. They never told the public, it was completely out of the blue. They didn't ask us to try to save them. Now it's gone and it may never come back. And I sat there beside the musicians who had no idea what they would do now, because symphonies everywhere are closing and there aren't new ones taking their place. Something is gone that I wanted for my children and this is the first time I've experienced that feeling. It's dreadful. Also, the meeting was filmed and I cried on local TV (did not realize they were filming me until my in-laws texted me...)

I know it's a hard time for everyone, and maybe we don't have enough money to support the arts. And maybe people don't care anymore, I was often one of the youngest people in the audience. But I regret this loss. The arts are important in an intangible way that I can't describe. I loved living in a smaller city with a symphony, I don't anymore.

It died, and I am only a single person, and I can't bring it back.

[flamefatalis]

Finnegan has to have emergency abdominal surgery tomorrow to possibly remove something that’s cancerous and I’m honestly not doing okay. Luigi, my previous dog, died very suddenly from an abdominal tumor and I’m flashing back really hard.

[ladysternchen]

Something unrelated to Tolkien for a change…

🌹each woman a rose💐

Violence against a human being is a crime.

Women before, during and after birth are human beings (and again very slowly for doctors and a few nurses and midwives as well: YOUNG. MOTHERS. ARE. HUMAN.BEINGS!)

Violence during pregnancy and during or after childbirth is a crime.

It is not ‘necessary’.

Forcing a woman to stay in a position in which she cannot bear the pain (a pain, moreover, that scientists put down as one of the most severe that a human being can endure) is an act of violence.

Shaming and belittleing a birthing woman is an act of violence.

Cutting a birthing woman open without her valid consent -that is consent given after the woman made an informed decision- is an act of violence.

Pressuring a woman to give up her right to make decisions concerning HER OWN body in potential favour of the unborn child is an act of violence.

Ignoring a woman’s ‘STOP’ is an act of violence and -if that includes your hands up her vagina or fumbling around with her breast trying to stuff a bleeding nipple into a screaming newborn’s mouth- sexual assault.

Invalidating a woman’s experience is an act of violence.

Yes yes yes, I know. Sometimes there is an emergency… yeah, you know, if you have time enough to say to the concerned nurse ‘oh, she’s not even im pain, she’s just acting the diva.’ you have enough time to say ‘dear, I know this is terrible frightening and you’re in pain, but we need to move fast now to make sure you and baby are ok. We’re taking good care of you. It’ll be over soon’- that makes the difference between a difficult birth and a traumatic one.

And besides, 1/3 of all mothers describe birth as being traumatic. Not 1/3 of all births include emergencies. So stop using that stupid argument to rectify you bad work.

You’re stressed, I get it. We have a global healthcare crisis. I am truly sorry for that. But if you’re so stressed it makes you feel that violence is needed to make the system work, then it’s probably time to step back.

[greasydumbfuck]

watched the 2004 punisher movie yesterday with pixie and honestly i had fun 👍 some stuff was good some stuff was eh some completely irrelevant stuff made me mildly annoyed. but most of all it was funny and they had frank hang around with his tits out for multiple scenes so i mean how could i not have a great time tbh

[gender-euphowrya]

something about when gamer men do the whole "ugh women just don't get why we love gaming so much :(". Well. maybe if women were actually treated seriously as gamers and gaming stopped being seen as a Male Activity where they get yelled at and harassed in voice chats or made to feel like the only games they're allowed to touch are the sims and stardew valley played on their pink computers

maybe women would 'get' gaming if gaming 'got' women

[taeraenomuyeppeo]

it's fucked up that someone can be your family your whole life but when they need your help you can't do anything because you aren't a REAL family

[lovingdonutnut]

NOOOO OKAME KUN IS DEAD? NOOOOOOOOOOO HE WAS MY FAVOURITE CHARACTER

[cetoddle]

it’s just so frustrating that even if things do get better someday and i’m able to manage my mental illnesses i still lost over a decade of my life to fighting with them and i will never be able to get those years back

[mars-ipan]

overcoming anxiety (through practicing the things that scare you) is so interesting. i used to be horrified of taking up space or alerting other people of my presence. now i'm compelled to tell strangers i like their outfits or hair or earrings- on bad days i tell maybe a quarter of them. do i still overthink it? absolutely. but i call attention to myself to tell someone else my opinion. and with the way they tend to smile and tell me "thank you!" i'm pretty sure it's taken to heart.

i used to be horrified of making phone calls as well. this is one i'm still getting over- i just Don't Like Doing It. i used to have a phone call routine that i still joke about- realize i need to call someone, cry, avoid it for a few days, suck it up, write a script, memorize the script, cry again, final script read, make the call with the script in front of me. and i would be Exhausted by the end of it. i don't cry when i need to call people anymore. i'm even needing scripts less and less- i've found out that people actually won't kill me if i talk a little too fast or stumble on my words. i doubt i'll ever like making phone calls- i especially hate robots (i'm afraid they'll mishear me and direct me wrong or a person will suddenly show up and i won't be prepared)- but i can make them now.

i get overwhelmed really easy. just a thing that happens to me. my brain is really really good at taking one task and breaking it up into thousands of little tasks and it feels like i'm drowning. if i try to make it fewer larger tasks then it starts to feel insurmountable. i was completely lost on how to deal with this (other than avoid until you get that panic attack and can do work in the post-catharsis calm until 6:00 AM) until one night when my dad (who i often meet late at night due to overlapping mental illness symptoms) asked me how to eat an elephant. i looked at him, confused, and he said "one bite at a time." that was way more effective than any other analogy i've seen has been. "light at the end of a tunnel"- i don't feel like i'm moving forward, i feel like i'm scaling a wall. "steps on a trail"- i can see my destination, but it feels impossible to move forward. but eating an elephant? that sums it up perfectly. this huge task which seems impossible at a glance. but it must be done. so you eat the elephant, a bite at a time. every time i'm overwhelmed i repeat that phrase to myself. it hasn't made any major changes yet, but it keeps me calm enough to start before i hit the panic attack, which i'll take.

i was such a perfectionist growing up- i actually thought it was a good thing (school always taught me to strive for perfection). but it made me scared to try new things- if i wasn't immediately good at them, then it clearly wasn't for me. i'm still not great at starting new hobbies, but i try a lot of new things within the hobbies i already have. i test out different ways of making art, i try new puzzle games i don't understand, etc. and the feeling of steady improvement reminds me that i don't need to be good right away. some of the most satisfying moments don't come from immediately being good- they come from achieving that skill over time. i'd like to try to learn to sew soon.

idk it's interesting. i rewire my own brain's fear response by doing the Horrifying Thing enough times for me to understand that no i will not die. and while i'm doing it it feels like nothing is changing. i get so stressed every time- it can actually take a lot out of me (turns out fight-or-flight burns a lot of energy). but i look back at then vs. now and i realize how far i've come, and i can't help but think "huh. neat"

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

has it hit yuuta yet that if megumi is gojo’s kid then he is kind of megumi’s extremely distant uncle? Bet he’d reach for that to explain away his extremely normal protective attachment

#seaglassgardens

Not really, because he doesn’t consciously think of himself as gojo’s relative. Like, he’s aware that he is gojos super distant relative but the connection is so attenuated that he’s not really thinking of gojo as an actual part of his family, so it hasn’t hit him. But he would take literally any explanation to justify his extremely normal protective attachment to Megumi at this point

[gunpowder-tim]

i am once again. thinking abt my ocs. and drowning.