#but because our root fears are different our responses to them are different

[nailisaa]

love transforms

(announcement at the end)

fear was the cause of most of my problems. now that i've discovered this as the root, its a lot easier to deal with now. i can imagine some of you do as well which is why i wanted to share this. part 3 of edwards's series is truly incredible, we don't speak of it enough despite some of us truly needing it right now. you and your feelings are valid, but because no one deserves to live in fear ever, we should know how to manage it.

THROUGH LOVE.

i know. this may not make sense at first. most people would just say "flip the thoughts" or do something to regain control. but truthfully there is no reason flip fearful thoughts first. you are much greater than them... and more importantly: that isn't the root.

if the root is fear, remove the feeling of fear entirely by first taking responsibility for what you're conscious of being. i understand that most struggle to, but if you can acknowledge the harm this cycle has done, you can also break it by ALLOWING yourself to experience lovelier thoughts instead. meaning, that if you've created fearful thoughts that means it HAS NO POWER ON ITS OWN. NONE. this should be the best news, to realize you are more than your thoughts.

CHOOSE LOVE OVER FEAR.

"Second, when you take responsibility for that fearful thought as your creation, ask yourself this simple question, 'What is it that I would LOVE to think?' From here as the Creator, you can start to go towards LOVE. LOVE is the most powerful 'thing' if you will, within you. Why? Because it never fails to TRANSFORM 'SELF.' Fear can stagnant, but LOVE TRANSFORMS. Why is this important? Remember the reason we are doing this. We are NOT trying to manipulate reality or force some change upon this physical world That will happen NATURALLY. Why? Because your world is REFLECTING SELF. Since it is reflecting 'SELF,' then how can we transform 'SELF' in the most efficient and best way possible? Through LOVE. By actually going within our minds and doing what we LOVE, having what we LOVE. This changes us at our very core. From this new feeling of freedom and love, you will find it incredibly easy to think what you want. You will even find it harder to feel fear. This ease and love starts to become your natural State. People will start treating you in a better way. You won't even have to imagine every little thing going your way, it just will. Things you wanted months ago, start appearing in your world. Things that bothered you deeply, literally has no effect on you anymore. Why? Because you are no longer DESIRING, no longer FEARING. You are living in FULFILLMENT. Fulfillment in Love. You are actually living what you LOVE within, and this love expresses itself without. To reiterate, when you are doing these meditations, and you get the 'resistance' which is just fear, remember the words of Neville: 'To repent to simply man's ability to entertain the nature of the opposite." Can you entertain the opposite of the nature of fear? Can you entertain Love? Is that not what you want?" - Edward Art

end.

IMPORTANT: this is my last post before i go on break. i am not sure when i will be back, but it definitely won't be for too long?

before i go, i wanted to share some advice. everyone interprets things differently, which is why reading directly from source is probably one of the best things you can do in your journey. (it is very easy to find misinfo on any app.) when i say this i don't mean skim through the whole thing, no. but read it slowly. you don't have to finish these books all in one day (i am saying this because i tried that once, and that was not it y'all😭💀). do it at a pace where you will be able to grasp what is being said. if you don't understand something, read the sentence or previous paragraphs again and you'll usually find the answer on your own. you may find new pieces to the puzzle if you just took the time, or even sat with yourself in silence (you may even come to new realizations, not from teachers but from you). there is no rush, seriously.

now anyway, about my break, my goal is to come back having read other authors and books, to share with you guys, and hopefully return with a new and stronger perspective on consciousness/awareness. recently i have been feeling as if something within me is missing, despite me knowing what i do. about Self. maybe it is time to explore what that is. i'll still be active on tumblr, but i'm not posting and my inbox will be closed. and i won't be answering dms about loa advice. i wish you all the best, truly. and i love u all, bye!

[theheirofthesharingan]

Hi there. I am sending this probably silly question because you are one of the few fans of both Sasuke and Itachi that I know, and this has been bugging me since the first time I watched Naruto.

So, Itachi wants Sasuke to be stronger, to kill him and go back to the village as a hero that killed an alleged Konoha traitor. But why does he tell him to kill his closest friend? I understand Itachi wants Sasuke to get the Mangekyou to get stronger, but this would surely make him a criminal in the eyes of Konoha. Also, I think it is unnecessary, since Sasuke could have gotten the Mangekyou after killing Itachi (which didn't happen in the end, but it was a possibility). I understand Itachi wanting to be sure, but still... He was risking way to much here.

It also does not make sense for Edo Tensei Itachi to "scold" Sasuke for being a "criminal" (he was not really scolding, but you get what I mean...) when he himself urged him to commit a way worse crime. So he says "I turned you into a criminal" but, actually, Sasuke never did what Itachi asked. I understand Itachi feels guilty for way more things than he deserves, and indeed he might be responsible for Sasuke leaving the village and going to Orochimaru to gain power for revenge... But anything that happened after Itachi's death was actually Sasuke's own decisions (decisions that came as a result of legit rage against Konoha for committing a genocide, of course).

I know Itachi was a child, traumatised, isolated and under inhumane pressure at the time. In these conditions, it is understandable that he did not make the best decisions, that he was not acting completely logically or thinking totally straight. I am not judging him in the slightest, I just would love to read your views on this.

Thank you and lots of love!

The rules of the Shinobi world are vastly different from those of ours. In the Shinobi world conflict is endless and lives hold different values than they do in ours. You may not face a trial for taking a life, much like you might not get a medal for saving one. Sakumo Hatake, for example, saved the lives of his comrades and ended up being shunned by the village, including the people whose lives he'd saved.

Itachi, after he killed his own parents, was leaving Sasuke in a place that had made him murder his own parents. Hiruzen was a weak shield and Danzo still lived in the village. Itachi wanted Sasuke to get strong, not only to kill him, but also to be able to protect himself in case Danzo made a move against him. An Uchiha, even with a simple Sharigan, was seen with fear. An Uchiha, with Mangekyo, would be formidable. Thinking from Itachi's POV, he was leaving Sasuke in a very hostile place, known for its belligerence towards Uchiha. What was a defenseless child supposed to do in case Danzo's Root came for him and Hiruzen proved useless? It didn't happen, but how would itachi know it wouldn't happen at all? Especially when Danzo did send Sai to kill Sasuke instead of letting a troop also follow them so they could take down Orochimaru, who had actually attacked the village.

Itachi had a flawed perception that as long as Sasuke lived, everything else he went through would be worth it, including his best friend's death. To him, Sasuke's life mattered, not a stranger's who might become his best friend. I believe he changed his mind later on when he met Sasuke and Naruto at the inn. He saw Naruto risking his own life, fighting for Sasuke despite being horrified of Itachi moments ago. It's probably after this that he made his mind to include one more objective to their final battle.

He also understood Sasuke didn't hate him at all. When he says 'you don't have enough hate', it's the truth, because when Sasuke learned Itachi was back and was after Naruto, he rushed to warn Naruto, but all he thought about was Itachi, their final day together before everything went wrong. And then he charged on Itachi, unprepared. We've known Sasuke to be calculative and in control of his emotions almost all the time. He loses it the moment he sees Itachi. Even if itachi tried to ignore him he wouldn't sit back. This wasn't the response of someone who had hate in his heart, but too much of emotional investment.

Yes. Itachi was always risking a lot. Him taking up the mission to annihilating his clan, then leaving Sasuke, and basically everything that followed - all of it was a gamble. Things could go either way. Sasuke had to be safe, for which he had to be protected all the time; but for him to become strong, Sasuke would have to train and practice, maybe go on potentially life threatening missions as well if he wanted to be strong enough to kill Itachi. Itachi's plan was always a double-edged sword. It could go either way.

Itachi blames himself for Sasuke's actions because he controlled a large portion of Sasuke's life. He did it unwillingly, in tears, in guilt, yes, but he did do it. Like I said above, he thought as long as Sasuke was safe it would be worth it. Itachi was somewhat responsible for Sasuke leaving Konoha, but not entirely. After Sasuke wakes up in the hospital, he challenges Naruto, because Naruto had suddenly become so strong. Even then he couldn't defeat Itachi. Then Sasuke, who had lived his whole life for the purpose of killing Itachi, was still no match for him. After Kakashi's pep talk, Sasuke even considers dropping the idea of revenge or at least struggles with it, thinking about Naruto, Sakura, and their bonding. Then Sound Four attack him. The rest is history.

After Itachi's death, while everything that Sasuke does is his own call, his own decisions, they still stem from the life Itachi made him live, and him not finding any closure. Yes, Itachi didn't want Sasuke to know the truth because he knew it would destroy him emotionally, and it happened exactly that way.

Itachi didn't scold Sasuke, he merely accepted where his plans failed. Itachi and Sasuke are very rich characters in terms of psychological depth. I'm no psychology student, but I love to read stuff here and there, and one pattern I've seen in both the brothers is that of 'age regression.'

When trauma impairs your ability to develop full emotional maturity, this is known as arrested psychological development. Trauma can “freeze” your emotional response at the age you experienced it. When you feel or act emotionally younger than your actual age, this is known as age regression.

Taken from this article. There's more to it, but I lifted the important part to answer this ask.

It's very common in how both Itachi and Sasuke respond. Many people say 'Itachi always saw Sasuke as a child to protect instead of a grown up' and he himself says this as Edo Tensei to Sasuke later on. I believe it's because, emotionally, he too never grew up beyond 12-13 and in some ways beyond four. To him he was never above 12 and Sasuke was never older than 7. All of his reactions to his life, however bad and with disastrous outcomes, are out of unresolved PTSD. It's the same with Sasuke and how he responds to his surroundings. Both of them were emotionally 'frozen' in the age they were traumatized. At the age of 12, even though Sasuke is too mature for his age, there's still the longing for his family and he remembers every single detail of his moments with them. Then after learning Itachi's truth too. I believe while he's a grown up now in Boruto, there's a part of him that's frozen in that moment when he found out about Itachi. Since Itachi isn't mentioned in Boruto and Sasuke's feelings for his family aren't the matter of discussion, I don't think I can prove this.

When Itachi saw what he'd made Sasuke - not a criminal or a monster - but a lonely, broken kid, he felt ashamed of himself. He feels so guilty because of his conscience. It's also because he was free from any obligation towards anyone after his death and was very flexible in face of new information that he admitted his wrongs.

Itachi, in fact, never realized what haopened to him was wrong too. His actions weren't spontaneous. On the contrary, they were the outcome of what was done to him. But unlike Sasuke and Kakashi, for instance, he did do many things wrong. Sasuke felt guilty for not being able to save his family, his clan, and then Itachi. Kakashi felt guilty for not being able to save Obito, then Rin. Even if it wasn't their fault. Itachi did a lot of things that were entirely unforgivable and he knew it too. So, his guilt outweighed any desire he might have had to acknowledge his trauma. He defined himself by the horrible things he'd done. Objectively, there would be a lot of nuances that you could consider, but fictional characters can never be objective.

When Hashirama praised Itachi, Itachi would never agree with him. When Sasuke called him perfect, Itachi disagreed with him. When Kabuto called him a genius/exceptional Itachi disagreed with him too.

Itachi felt nothing but regret his entire life, which eventually defined him as a person.

[coyoteprince]

I am really, really going Through It right now, but... in the best way possible? Like, really good things? It's just a lot to juggle at once so I'm absolutely wore out from a massive growth spurt

I deserve to be joyous about this so:

-New house! All our own! We're even moving during October (date was pushed back due to philly market), very spiritually important time for me

-Getting married next Fall once things calm down, finally, after being engaged for a few years

-Came to terms with Widderwood being an important purpose in my life, an art that feeds my soul- even if the result remains small, all this work isn't a waste, because the process enriches my life and brings me joy. The many years of dedication I've had for it is a sign that it's the right choice for me to continue following, and am super looking forward to the years of doing the actual page layouts. I've been setting realistic expectations to maintain my happiness with production, am working it into my new schedule, and I get to ink the pages at my antique writing desk in the sunroom as I look out at our back garden once we move... waow

-Learning a ton of important things about myself- my fears, roots of problems and behaviors thanks to trauma and ego that I didn't notice. I'm being kinder to myself, less judgemental of others, and letting go of other's projections rather than continuing to internalize them. I know what I am, how to be empathetic and accept my missteps, but also what isn't worth my time and energy.

-Learning how to adjust my desire for perfection in myself to much more healthy & reasonable level, and being more willing to delegate

-Rebuilding my business internally from the ground up for success, seeking continuous education for business & science, and after years of struggling and testing, FINALLY figuring out a work-life method that works for my messed up desires-varience autism brain. Balance!

-Similarly, figuring out how to balance cooking for two autistic people who have greatly different cravings & stims

-Realizing what a hard working, loyal, and loving person I am with an unrivaled, firey dedication to change and self improvement. Capricorn to an eerie degree.

Overall I feel like I'm in the transitional period between continuing to be poisoned by the aftermath of prolonged abuse and illness, and finding peace while blossoming far beyond what happened to me. Something I've strived for, but wasn't sure I'd ever have. In a way, it's obtaining independence and finding out who I really am as a person, unclouded by other's words and fearful what-ifs.

20 something years of being locked away. About 8 more years of new experiences, perspectives, professional help, love, and grueling work to dismantle things in myself. I guess this is what real healing and responsibility looks like- at least in my case. I'll never stop growing, but I am at a pivotal point of change.

What I've experience is important to me because it set the projectile for my life. I want to be somewhat open because I want others to be aware of what autistic children often experience and how it affects them long term... but I also know I have more to me and don't have to be haunted anymore. Turning an unpleasant experience into a tool I can control is a lovely reward and I can now whole heartedly say: I love being alive.

[antianakin]

In response to your previous post, why do you think people still love Anakin despite all the selfish and violent things he has done?

Just for archival sake, this is the post I assume you're responding to.

I love when you guys force me to drop the bitter old hag act and be more legitimately analytical about characters I dislike lol.

The somewhat less analytical response to this post is that people like him due to protagonist bias, Hayden Christensen being considered attractive, and Darth Vader having a lot of nostalgia from the OT.

However, while I think those things are always a major aspect in why people like the character, the more analytical version is that Anakin is a character created to be relatable. He's got flaws that most of us can look at and recognize in ourselves and even though he does become a monster because of them, he is also capable of saving himself in the end and doing something heroic despite that, he is allowed to get better and stand next to confirmed good guys like Yoda and Obi-Wan as what seems to be equals, he is capable of being loved by someone as kind and good as Luke Skywalker DESPITE his many flaws and heinous choices. And like... that's an impressively compelling character journey, to see someone become the worst version of themselves it is possible to be and still be loved enough to make the choice to be better.

And it's not like I haven't enjoyed my fair share of selfish characters who do heinous things in my day, even within Star Wars itself. Some of my favorite characters include people like Saw Gerrera and Luthen Rael and Cassian Andor and Reva Sevander, ALL of whom made some pretty nasty choices or acted selfishly at some point or another. Reva is literally built to be a parallel and then foil FOR ANAKIN.

So it's not like I don't necessarily see the appeal of Anakin as this massively flawed character with sympathetic motivations for his immensely awful choices, someone who wanted to be good and, for a little while, WAS good, but who was led towards a dark path that he knew he shouldn't take but took anyway because he let his fears control him. Anakin making the mistakes he does is literally a cautionary tale, you're SUPPOSED to relate to him and see yourself in him, the story kind-of doesn't work if you don't in some ways.

So I think a lot of people who like him probably just see a lot of themselves in him, both good and bad. They project onto Anakin and sympathize with his motives and his struggles and, even though they know he's a screw-up, they root for him. They want him to get better because if someone like Anakin can get better, then so can they, so can we all. Anakin is a cautionary tale saying that even those of us with the best of intentions can lead ourselves down a road of selfishness if we aren't careful about our motives, but he's also a hopeful tale saying that even the WORST of us can lead ourselves back to a road of selflessness if we're willing to put in the effort. So you can feel sympathy for the first half and take strength from the second half of his story, depending on where you are in your life.

This is obviously all sort-of said in like the best faith interpretation of why people might like Anakin. There's plenty of people who like him as a power fantasy, people who see Anakin as this impressive strong character who takes down his abusers and takes control of his narrative by defying the prophecy and killing the Jedi. And, you know, everyone gets to take what they want out of stories of course, but boy do these people and I take VERY different things out of Star Wars. I curate my internet experience so I never have to have anything to do with these people, but they absolutely exist.

And at the end of the day, all of that is wrapped up in a character who, in one trilogy, is played by a very classically attractive actor who gets to kiss Natalie Portman and is occasionally funny, and in the other trilogy, is represented as this cool-looking villain in an imposing black costume with a skull helmet and cape and some memorable quotes. So while the deeper reasons for people's enjoyment of his character definitely exist, the surface-level ones are still there and can enhance that enjoyment a lot.

And I'm sure there's any number of other, smaller things that impacted people's reactions to Anakin. He was introduced as a child in TPM and so people who were expecting this young adult character already in the throes of darkness might've ended up seeing him very differently and relating to him on a whole different level. People might've ended up rooting for him because the representation of the Jedi was so far away from what they THOUGHT Jedi would be that they ended up liking Anakin simply because he's pitted against the Jedi they didn't like. Maybe some people didn't like him until TCW and they really appreciate THAT version of Anakin quite a lot, maybe especially his relationship with Ahsoka. Maybe some people just really fell for the doomed romance plotline with Padme. Maybe some people like him because Obi-Wan and Luke like him and those dynamics are intriguing to them.

But for me, Anakin has just never felt all that compelling. I was introduced to the Prequels first as a kid and I was far more invested in Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon (who were way funnier than Anakin ever was) and Padme (who had really pretty costumes). I didn't HATE Anakin by any means, but he wasn't all that funny, he didn't have the cooler action scenes for the first two films, and the romance plotline didn't hook me. I didn't mind Anakin as an accessory to Obi-Wan, but that was about as far as I went.

As I got older and more into the fandom, though, I started learning a lot more about the Jedi and why they WEREN'T the true villains of the Prequels the way everyone said they were and what Lucas's messages had actually been intended to be, and the romance with Padme just kept aging like milk, and my investment in the Jedi often meant defending them AGAINST people who saw them as no more than Anakin's abusers at worst, or a repressive society that unintentionally led Anakin to darkness at best. Arguing FOR the Jedi usually meant arguing AGAINST Anakin and pointing out all of the places HE was wrong and selfish and why the Jedi were RIGHT not to trust him. And the more passionate I got about defending the Jedi, the less and less I ended up liking Anakin. I wasn't overly invested in him in the first place, so it wasn't hard to take me from neutral to decidedly negative. Had I enjoyed him more as a kid, either in the Prequels or the Original Trilogy, maybe I would've landed in a different place with him, but I didn't. It didn't feel like any great loss to decide I didn't like him that much anymore. By comparison, I liked Padme a lot more as a kid and so even though I often find her just as selfish as Anakin, I like her a lot more usually.

So I get why people find him compelling, I really do, but he just doesn't speak to me. I highly doubt he ever will anymore.

[shiraglassman]

Hey, I know this is kind of a dumb question, but I came across a TikTok about a month ago suggesting that dragons (the western, fire breathing, princess snatching, treasure hoarding ones) were rooted in antisemitic in the same way something like goblins are. I couldn’t tell if it was a joke or not, and it kind of sent me into a tailspin, since I’ve always loved dragons (I read the WoF series ONCE and wouldn’t shut up about it for 3 years), and I was worried that I would have to drop them entirely for fear of offending someone. I can definitely see the similarities between common antisemitic tropes and dragon tropes, but I’ve always heard that the origins of the western dragon were that it was just a scalier of the devil and not meant to represent any marginalized community. However, I am not Jewish in any way, and I’m aware it’s not my place to dictate what is and isn’t harmful, so I was curious as to what you thought. (Sorry about how long this is TuT)

I held on to this ask for a few weeks to try to make sure my response made sense, so here goes. Disclaimer that I'm just one Jewish woman who loves dragons, and I claim no expertise or position of authority. I can't guarantee that someone won't look at your special interests and judge you unfairly. I also can't guarantee that you'll be hyperaware enough and careful enough to catch dogwhistles if they're subtle, compared with ordinary fictional dragons. What I can guarantee is that your average Jewish person is not going to assume you are more unsafe to be around than other unknown gentiles just because you like dragons, but fandom spaces and Tumblr spaces sometimes represent a skewed or specific cross-section of the population and may react differently. I can't make any of those calls. I don't want to tell you to start tuning out marginalized people when we speak about our issues including bad representation, but I also don't think "every Western dragon" is a problem the same way the entire perception of Halloween witches is, for example. For "some reason" (antisemitism) we've decided that big hooked noses are a thing you strap to your face to fake being a witch, or the way witches look in clip art. This is an issue because it takes a simple, neutral feature that some of us have and exaggerates it to the point of looking nonhuman. "Ha ha," says the trope. "Wouldn't it be funny if this trait that these Others have was so different and so jarring in appearance that they looked as different as they truly are, from us, the In Group?"

If the same group of folks who had anxiety about us coexisting alongside them created the witch aesthetic as created the Western dragon lore, and indeed much of old-fashioned European fantasy, it's easy to see how their feelings about us an other marginalized groups (disabled people etc.) creep into the stories. HOWEVER, it's also incredibly easy for dragons to not be us. Or have anything to do with us. If you're nervous when writing your own stories that someone is going to mistake your greedy characters for Jewish-coded, try to establish that real (human or otherwise) Jewish characters coexist with the greedy dragon or whatever to show that you're not using the dragon as a subconscious Jewish reference. But if you're talking about just "can I continue to buy dragon merch from creators who draw cute art", the only thing I can tell you is that there's an intense diversity of opinion among the Jewish people and even though I'm saying it's fine and probably most people at my temple would say it's fine, I can't account for strangers on apps I don't even have. Personally, I think you're safe as long as you avoid dragon things that evoke the trope directly. And many MANY dragons don't even evoke the trope these days, because so many millennials and younger grew up adoring dragons so we launched media where dragons are good. And don't even always hoard wealth. Much of modern dragon media seems to ignore the greedy and/or hoarding tropes entirely or have replaced greed as a motivator for the collections with "this dragon has a special interest", which is cute and doesn't evoke antisemitic tropes at all. You'll probably be able to make good judgments about what does the trope and what doesn't, but for some additional help here is a post Meir and I did on @writingwithcolor, which is where we'd prefer these questions be directed (yes, I know we're closed currently but we're reopening soon.) P.S. If this was sent to my personal specifically to avoid the WWC ask box being closed, please don't — that's an amount of volunteer work I simply can't take on. But I also know that it's possible and likely that you didn't know about WWC at all, so now you do — feel free to peruse our vast archives of past posts. @im-tired1124

[crystal-crax]

A RANT

A TRAUMATIZED FATHER

aka: a splinter defense

I've been rewatching a bunch of different tmnt versions and a thought popped in my mind. Is splinter an analogy for depressed/traumatized parents?

Most interpretations of him make me feel that way, at least. Specially the 2003, bayverse, 2012, rise and mutant mayhem splinters- mostly because those are the versions i grew up with and are more familiar with, lol.

The way his own point of view, experiences impacts the turtles and affects their personalities and goals so...i don't know how to express it, but it leaves a bad taste in my mouth when i see people treating him as some kind of villain¿

In almost every version of Splinter, there's a catalyst for his choice to raise the turtles as ninjas and a deep fear to allow them to explore the real world. Something happens to him that makes him either disconnect emotionally (bayverse/rise), place insane responsabilities and expectations on them (2012 i'm looking straight at you), or makes him be overly protective of his sons (mayhem, 2003).

I might be speaking out of turn, but most versions of the hamato/Splinterson family feel as if a part of their dynamic is that of a partially dysfunctional one, mostly due to splint's traumas.

2003 and Bayverse saw the one that took care of him be killed without mercy, vowing to take care of the young turtles that were affected by the actions of those who altered his world.

Rise and 2012 are direct victims, being stripped away from humanity without a choice, taken from everything they knew, betrayed, so they keep clinging to the only thing that still gives them a small blink of hope and happiness, four little turtles that have been mutated just as he was (one even directly sharing his dna with the turtles).

Even mutant mayhem! Sure he wasn't directly in some accident- But even he shows high levels of anxiety and fear towards the world, prohibiting his children to interact directly with it and teaching them that humans can't be trusted at all. He has been attacked and persecuted, but what makes him break is watching his own sons (the only family and precious possesion he holds, said by himself) get hurt and rejected by humans as he once was (mikey almost got ran over my a bus y'all). He deeply CONNECTS with his sons and clearly projects his own fears and issues on them, straining the way the boys perceive themselves and their own relationships within the family.

Experts agree that trauma affects the father's/mother's parenting style, which leads the children to adopt unhealthy coping mechanisms and attitudes. The effects of intergenerational trauma can impact many parts of your life, from how you see yourself to how you communicate with others.

“Trauma can inform nearly everything about the way we exist and engage with our worlds, including the ways we parent and model behaviors for children,”

Saba Harouni Lurie, LMFT and founder of Take Root Therapy in California

Am i saying splint is abusive? NO, but i'm definately explaining that almost every version of him replicates the pressure and weight he feels, which in turn makes the own brothers perpetuate said cycle of misunderstanding and emotional confusion/neglect

Sometimes, children learn unhealthy patterns indirectly through interacting with or observing family members. For example, if your parents experienced trauma they may tend to avoid distress and conflict altogether. They may relate to each other in passive or passive-aggressive ways. They may have trouble asserting their needs constructively or directly problem-solving.

Raph's anger issues, leo's anxiety, don's temper and loneliness (which sometimes seems to trasnlate on finding comfort with his computers/machines) and mikey's high emotions and empathy.

The boys love each other, they're family, but almost in every version they seem to battle their own feelings of inadequacy. They fight, hide their thoughts and emotions, have sudden bursts of anger or panic and fail to understand how to properly express themselves (heck, the rise turtles even go so far as directly stating they've barely ever been hugged)

Yes, every splinter has failed and could've done better, but they did what they believed was better for their sons. Their only wish was to keep them safe, hide them from harm and be able to live peacefully as a family; if training their sons to be ninjas was the best thing they could think of, honestly, who am i to judge?

My conclusion? Take the family for a road trip to the nearest therapist

[brownskinallure]

Self Sabotage and Perseverance

Self-sabotage is a common pattern that many people struggle with. It is often linked to our fear of being hurt, based on prior experiences, which can lead us to make choices that ultimately prevent us from achieving our goals. Whether it’s in our personal or professional lives, self-sabotage can have a significant impact on our ability to succeed.

The fear of being hurt is a natural human emotion that results from past experiences. It can lead us to avoid taking risks, trying new things, or putting ourselves out there. For example, if we have been hurt in a past relationship, we may struggle to trust others in the future, leading us to sabotage potential new relationships by keeping our distance or pushing people away.

Self-sabotage is not limited to relationships either. It can show up in our work lives too. Goals that we set for ourselves are impacted by prior experiences that have caused pain. If we have failed at work in the past, we may feel unworthy or incapable of achieving our current career goals.

The problem with self-sabotage is that it can become a pattern that is repeated over and over again so unaware. We become stuck in a loop, making self-defeating decisions that ultimately lead to more pain and frustration.

To break free from self-sabotage, we need to challenge ourselves to see things from a different perspective. It is important to be introspective and understand the underlying emotions that are driving our actions. It requires taking the time to self-reflect and get to the root cause of our fears.

Healing is another important step that we need to take to overcome self-sabotage. It can be hard to move forward from our past experiences, but acknowledging and accepting them is an essential part of the healing process. We must be willing to seek HONEST help and support, whether it be through therapy, counseling, or simply talking with friends and family.

It’s not enough to only be open about our struggles; we must also make a conscious effort not to make others suffer because of it. When we are caught up in our own emotional turmoil, it’s easy to become self-focused and not consider how our actions might impact those around us. We must strive to be mindful of how our behavior affects others and take responsibility for our actions.

Self-sabotage is a challenging pattern to overcome. We must challenge ourselves to see things from a different perspective, heal from our past experiences, and be mindful of how our actions impact others. By taking these steps, we can break through the cycle of self-sabotage and achieve the success we desire.

[sourrcandy]

KNIGHTS ; an update ↳ bc it's been 2 years since i began this wip

psd by @destimnesia

draft status. draft 1 ver 3 (aka the hoedition)

act 1 wc. 40,849

total wc. 51,709

more under the cut. bc goddamn this turned out to be a long post

the synopsis.

citizens of arkridge city call them puppeteers, rulers, monsters. fear is a weapon the round table wields with ease, but when the godfather of arkridge is murdered, the city is reminded that they, too, are only human.

with a multi-billion dollar inheritance and the fate of their father’s kingdom on the line, the nine clemonte children must navigate this elaborate arkridge game before the killer brings the city to its knees.

major updates.

i'm posting 2 different word counts because i write out of order and some scenes are done ahead of time since i have inspiration for those chapters!! the outline is planned for 3 acts so knights is predicted to be around 120k words in total.

after a long think (i wrote it down on actual paper instead of my notion) about all the characters and their motivations, i have decided to keep SELENA away from the main plot and only mention her briefly with she is 'out of town'. because she contributes nothing, her motivations are the same as aredhel's, and her actions can be covered by other characters.

so far our character motivations are :

serafine — to become ceo of clemonte corporations without the responsibility of her father's dirty empire + out of reginald's shadow

theodore — to be free from his promise / responsibility to reginald and forge his own path

aredhel — to prove her worth to being part of the family

violet — to tear down the clemontes' long legacy of being the roots of arkridge city's underworld and rebuild it in her own image

maribelle — to find the truth behind reginald's murder and change the city for the better with her experiences in the less wealthy districts before she was adopted

colette — to support her family no matter to cost and use the clemonte's influence to grow into herself

sage — to renovate the family and surpass her father's legacy

storm — to prove her worth to sage and simultaneously find her individuality away from sage

selena — in her overseas exchange era oops

side character updates.

blackbird — nothing major changing!! he is still going to be playing his part with bringing storm out of her shell while achieving his own means through her. act 2 is going to be more focused on why the round table and the kumiho gang have butted heads continuously and explain his motives on teaming up with storm

kit — he is going to be somewhat like sera's younger self -> hopeful, over-achieving, and taught to be accountable. BUT he is going to have a much more strict moral code and helps sera stray away from the cruel path knights usually take

morgan — i think i wrote her out to be more insane than she should, almost comical ngl. so i'm going to explore more of her genius / intelligence in act 2 to show that she is not just an insane person and delve more into her past with reginald

marcus — i have been pretty vague about marcus in act 1 bc it is mainly showing his dynamic / relationship with aredhel. he is going to enable a lot of aredhel's actions later on so i'm hoping to explore his motives subtly through the main characters before act 3

some of my favourite lines from knights so far.

finally. thank you to everyone (and ppl in wtw) who continuously showed interest in knights and for motivating me!! i know it's been a long ride and trust me, it's going to be a longer journey bc i am a slow writer. also kudos to mole and nicole for all your help / comments on my hoedition draft, it's what keeps me going <3

general taglist. @kazino @serpentarii @seasteading @lasbrumas @sympathyhouse @halcionic @janaisvu

knights taglist. @redbloodprose @writeblrfantasy @innocentlymacabre

— send an ask / put in tags to be added/removed.

[vaalthus]

Convergence Part 1 (spoilers)

*Deep inhale*

*Long exhale*

THE TIME IS NIGH!!!

So to start,

I have to say I was utterly shocked that Jaania chose not sacrifice any more of her forces to buy her more time weave her spell but after giving it some thought it's an action that makes sense for her. As I mentioned in commenting on the Final Steps release, Jaania is finally able to see that our motivations we're always intended to strive for everyone's sake in the best of ways we knew how. As a result, she's hoping we can see and have faith in the good she's trying to bring about through her ascension.

As such, it makes no sense in her eyes to waste the lives of those who have been so loyal to her in helping her reach this moment when there's a chance their lives can be spared by us and they in turn be able to experience the world she seeks to achieve. Though those same troops would have been more than happy to lay down their lives for her so that world is brought to fruition. It's just a pity Jaania didn't give the order to retreat sooner otherwise the last of the Pelekoans might have survived.

What troubles me is the comments like these:

It's no secret to anyone that the last of Jaania's forces were those who were most loyal to her and her vision but what I find troubling here is the inevitable aftermath of these people once this conflict reaches its conclusion. As Hansa, pointed out to us in the Awakened Depths, Jaania became a beacon for those who had a simple wish to be achieved: to be free of any and all magical threats that Lore offers. However, it's not just these soldiers that want that, it's the nobles, the farmers, the little guys that have been supporting the Rose all these years across Greenguard and likely still do, sure that number has definitely taken a dive since the start of Book 3 but I doubt it's still insignificant. All of those people will soon find their dreams and the person who was meant to bring back a sense of uninterrupted peace in their lives is about to be dashed. We can only hope their response to this reality is constructive as opposed to the opposite.

What I've been saying all along folks :3

Miss me with that "we're not so different you and I" speech.

I like to think this is the Hero taking all they've learned about the ability to make choices in the Maleurous saga and is just throwing that much needed wisdom back at Jaania who feels the need to instill order in the world.

This comment is interesting to me because we have seen the Hero effectively try and be everywhere all at once for eveyone's sake, quite almost obsessively I might add, and I feel if Jaania hadn't recently just had a change of heart on her perspective on them, and taken the time to analyze the Hero's deal, she might have been able to more strongly appeal to their need, their desperation, in protecting everyone they can. Not that it would work either way, the Hero's distrust and deep-rooted fear of her, as seen in Fear, showed that getting us on her side was simply not possible.

If she was more predatory, of course, she would have used that aspect against us as every other villain that attacks our psyche has done before. A neat contrast here is what I'm pointing out.

*sigh* Every single new questionable scene with this woman continues to force me to find comfort in the fact that her and the other Magesters too dependent on the Mana Core Fragment will be dead eventually thanks to Roirr's actions. I truly want to believe there's a positive future for the Shapeless Empire that doesn't involve exploiting its citizens through this agreed upon cycle without violence but the rotting hands of the past never want to let go of control easily.

YOU GAVE THEM TRAUMA AND WEREN'T EVEN SORRY!!!

Okay technically this right here is the more sensible reasoning, but I stand by what I said! What I like most in this scene is that we simply reaffirm what we've been trying to tell her since this whole mess started with her organization. Everything we bring up about the harm the Rose has done thus far has been consistent and aren't negated by the fact that Jaania, at heart, wants to do what she believes is best for everyone's sake.

What I love even more however is how she averts her eyes the moment we bring up Akanthus because she knows she can't even reasonably, or delusionally for that matter, deny she has made a grave error in judgement in allowing Akanthus' abuses on, well, basically everyone, and soon everything, in his wake. It's that "Yeah, ya got me there look" that just sends warm feelings down my spine.

Now if you told me at the start of this saga Jaania was going to offer us a bargain to effectively play as the puppeteer god of fate alongside her, I definitely would have called you insane. It's moment I'm sure comes as a complete shock to everyone, it certainly did to me anyway. And honestly why wouldn't it? It's one thing to ask us to stand down and simply allow her to achieve apotheosis but it's a completely different matter to propose to come and play god. But it's one that sadly makes all too much sense.

Jaania has admitted that she has made terrible mistakes and has been too much of an imperfect being in her quest to achieve peace and prosperity for Lore. So better way to accommodate for her ham-fisted actions and judgement so far then to have someone like the Hero to hopefully keep her worse tendencies in check. As opposed to someone like Akanthus or Zadd who would, in all likelihood, make things worse had they been afforded the opportunity. There's another reason I believe she makes this offer but I'll get to that later.

Nothing else to say here beyond epic callback!

Out of all the Hero's moments in this quest, I believe this is where their experiences throughout the Maleurous saga shines through the brightest.

In a way, you could argue that, in spite of the obvious chaos that will come with it, Jaania's plan is to instill an eternal order, a Destiny, upon Lore itself, one in which she will insists never ends as she dictates. Yet the Hero knows the importance of others being able to decide the paths they choose to walk, I'd argue they've known that since Calamity, without some transcendental hand to yank them in another direction against their own will. So they certainly would not agree to be the one to dictate the fate of all those that live on Lore let alone allow someone as misguided as Jaania to do it.

Okay, I think we all knew that the void pearl was too easy a solution to deal with Akanthus and was likely not going to work but there's something absolutely amusing about Hesperrhodos being used a shield to be sent to the Void and then teleport immediately back to Lore without issue since, ya know, Elemental Spirits can just do that at any time. Hell I at least would have thought that thing would have let a monster through or something. The downside to seeing Zvezdana looking completely slack-jawed after these events unfolded is the fact that we still don't have a damned plan to take Akanthus out of commission...so yeah.

I have to say I love this final appeal Jaania gives to the trio of combatants because it shows a few things. First, that she still fails to understand that her organization was really only giving the illusion of peace to all those the dwelt within range of the Rose's reach and even then only really through the lens of normal humans. Second, it displays that she never truly had a proper grasp on the relationship she fostered with those she worked alongside. Lastly, she places too much hope that wanting the same things is not the same as agreeing ideologically how get those things.

Which inevitably leads to one option: Violence

I have waited 12. long. years. for this very moment. 12 years spent waiting since we broke free from that ice cap. 8 years I waited since from the first time we saw her again in Timelines. 7 years since the original Gala and our spat. 4 years since dealing with the second rift and I had a deeper appreciation for her mental state which motivates her.

And now I am finally here to fight Jaania one on one. So, you best believe I fought alone to prove which of us was could beat the other!

The following boss fight that ensues is perhaps one of the best thematic story fights in the entire game at this point, as it should be for the antagonist that is the face for this entire saga. I'm quite pleased that devs designed her to be difficult, hell I'm even glad that couldn't easily soul gambit my way out of this one.

In terms of mechanics, it's everything you could expect, Jaania does everything she can to debuff us and each time she fails and has her health cut down in bulk she commands even more strength to take us down, even attempting to go for the old freeze'em solid trick and when that doesn't draw any purchase thanks to Aegis she relies on her new found soul weaving arts to dispatch us. All the while we deal with the tragic music in the background tugging at the heart strings for a conflict that should have been avoided.

How far we've come since the Doom Amulet was our first real challenge in-game for year, eh?

And can I say how amusing it is that Jaania trapping us in ice is something that could only work once? Aegis apparently always had the means of unfreezing, he simply couldn't due to Draco keeping everyone away from where we were placed. So, with him already being close by to protect our soul from going poof, there's no way he's going to let us get trapped again. Even more amusing is to think about how Jaania is basically using the old ice soul weaver meta to take us on.

But after all of that we prove in the end, with or without aid, to be stronger than Jaania, at least in this exact moment.

It's a pity though that the moment does not last as expected Jaania will not let it end without fighting at her full potential.

This right here is the reason I believe Jaania made her initial proposal to us and why I bring up the Maleurous saga. For me at least, it's easy to see the similarities between Jaania and Notha. Both are exceptionally powerful accomplished mages that desperately sought out to change a world that gave them deep rooted traumas that they wished to change that world so that the suffering they experienced could not continue. However, where Notha wanted to bring about chaos to change the order of the world; Jaania is hellbent on imposing order on the chaos the world of Lore and its magic offers its inhabitants. Furthermore, I suspect, unlike Notha, that Jaania cannot bring herself to reconcile with the trauma magic has placed on her life and the people she cared about. Most defining of all though, which will likely be her downfall, is her need to be in control of everything so that she or anyone else might never hurt again.

Antagonists like Jaania are always left in a hard spot. They seek to rid the world of suffering and conflict forever and while that is a noble desire they fail to realize how unfortunately intrinsic those things are to existence. Thusly they bang their heads on a wall until they're bloodied and broken only for that dream they longed for to dissipate before their very eyes.

And so, her last option is to go full synchronization. I can't guess what happens next here with Jaania. Judging by the increased streaks of white in her hair, her soul is continuing to unravel though I think she's in no worse of a state than Tomix was when he was at the end. I was originally going to say synchronizing with a corrupt spirit created through forbidden magic would spell instant catastrophe for Jaania but then I remembered Aspar was created through the same means, although he was just a fragment, so she might pull off the effect with little issue.

I suppose we must simply wait and see what becomes of our troublesome Arch Magus and where the winds will turn for her ambitions.

And of course, there's still this asshole and the doom device.

[rf-times]

Hello. I saw your post on tradwives and I wanted to ask a question. I am an aspiring tradwife and an ex-feminist. And I'm genuinely curious about what you said. I respect your opinions and understand you want the best for women and yourself too.

Do you believe that what you said applies to most tradwives or just white tradwives in first world countries? Additionally, in my personal experience, I did not have a working mother but I was pushed into university even when I knew I couldn't handle it. Isn't it better for women who cannot handle the competitive job world to become a tradwife? Particularly if they're naturally submissive, like housework and submitting to someone who can make their decisions for them? I have talked to really good traditional men who are good people and their masculinity consists of being strong and protective men instead of the abusive ones feminists think they generally are.

That's not exactly one question so apologies for that. I mean this all in good spirit and I genuinely want to know. Have a good day!

On the contrary, women who feel overwhelmed and scared by the world, who just want a nice protective man to look after them, and who have people pleasing tendencies and feel incapable to handle independence, are the women who are most vulnerable and susceptible to abuse. If your motivation for becoming a tradwife is that are scared of independence then what leverage do you have if the men you rely on to look after you fail you in some way? If you cannot handle independence you will find it so much harder to be able to leave.

What exactly do you think abusive men look like? Do you think they announce themselves to everyone in any given circumstance? You say you've spoken to really good traditional men, how well do you know them really? How well do the women who get abused by their partners know their men? Abusiveness is virtually never obvious and manifests in many ways across a relationship, as does negligence which is how so many women who are supposedly being 'provided for' end up bearing the full brunt of managing a household and finding that if they are ever sick or need anything, their husbands leave them.

I don't believe in 'natural submissiveness', especially in women. I myself am soft-spoken, have trouble asserting myself and often fall into people-pleasing patterns including a lifelong struggle with subconsciously and consciously pleasing and coddling the men around me. Many women are the same, is this a natural fixture of our personalities that we should just fall into and let men decide things for us? Or is it a response to social conditioning and a brutal world designed to undermine women's confidence in ourselves and our ability to participate in society as equals so that we rely on men? I encourage you to look beyond your fears and insecurities to see what you're really capable of.

What I've said about tradwives applies to places where women have more choices and expectations to participate in the external economy/workforce and are told they could potentially succeed in capitalism in their own right. Because it is a different thought process for women who are given no opportunity or expectation to be defined beyond wifehood and motherhood. The very notion of 'tradwife' is western centric, as its all about returning to so called 'traditional' roots.

[anghraine]

I forget what the opposite of strawmanning is called, but it's like ... I don't doubt that Tolkien genuinely disliked feminism, I just find it rather odd that his way of addressing this in his work seemed to be writing bitter, hard-edged, and incredibly eloquent women who give fantastic speeches about being fucked over by patriarchy. And either there's no real response from other characters or the response is deeply underwhelming, so I'm like ... okay, what are you even trying to do here?

These women are also usually very beautiful, in the interests of full disclosure, so you get all these ... like, tall hot women who do not fear pain or death!!! and are full of towering resentment at very real injustice and/or suffering. The details and nuances of these characters are quite different, but these characters obviously represent a type that Tolkien found compelling and kept returning to without really finding a solution to the problems these characters raise and pose.

I've read a lot of female characters by a lot of authors, and maybe it's just because my personal taste in female characters is really similar to Tolkien's, but few things click with me so much as Éowyn's speech to Aragorn, or Erendis's to Ancalimë, or Andreth's and Morwen's... everything, or even the shorter defiant responses we hear from Haleth, Aredhel, Niënor, Galadriel. There's even a trace of this with someone as improbable and deliberately unlikable as Lobelia Sackville-Baggins, who confronted Saruman's men, survived imprisonment, and tottered out to hobbit glory.

I don't know, really. Maybe giving angry female characters kickass speeches was as far as he was willing to go with them. And to go by his favored types in male characters, he did have a taste for proud, attractive, talented, often abrasive, and hubristic characters regardless of gender. But it's not only a general type, IMO, when you've got a bunch of these women talking about gender specifically and its impact on them, so—I don't know, sometimes I just shrug and get on with my fandom life without trying to navigate the quagmire of intent. But it's definitely a question I return to.

So there's no real conclusion here. I guess I'll just leave you with my personal favorites! Here's Éowyn's response to Aragorn:

"All your words are but to say: you are a woman, and your part is in the house. But when the men have died in battle and honour, you have leave to be burned in the house, for the men will need it no more." (LOTR 767)

But also Erendis, my love:

"...Númenor was to be a rest after war. But if they[men] weary of rest and the plays of peace, soon they will go back to their great play, manslaying and war. Thus it is; and we are set here among them. But we need not assent. If we love Númenor also, let us enjoy it before they ruin it. We also are daughters of the great, and we have wills and courage of our own. Therefore do not bend, Ancalimë. Once bend a little, and they will bend you further until you are bowed down. Sink your roots into the rock, and face the wind, though it blow away all your leaves." (Unfinished Tales)

[korrasamibottles]

Long tag game!! Thanks @nova-leaf @lilrobinbird for tagging me💖

How many tumblr accounts have you had before this one?

Just one! I made it in 2012 to look at Walking Dead and Supernatural gifs and eventually it just turned into a personal blog. I met two of my best friends there!! Unfortunately I'm locked out of it for now because I decided to be a responsible internet enjoyer and changed all my passwords and I uhh. I can't remember what I changed it to. And the email I used to sign up 12 years ago is long dead. So that blog might be gone forever. Life is a highway I'm gonna ride it all night long etc. etc.

How long have you been in fandom?

I had really intense Supernatural and MCU phases back in the day, and binged TLOK and ATLA in 2015 after the Korra finale (I watched Korra first and then atla, and I maintain that's the best way to do it😌) but I never really participated in the fandom, like I never talked to anyone or made anything. So I'm gonna say I've been in fandom since summer 2023 when I made this blog to post my tlok fic (couldn't post it on my old one. My face is/was all over it. You understand.) Everyone I've interacted with here is like. Shockingly nice. Idk why I expected to be beaten with hammers but umm it didn't happen so thank you all for that💖

Your favorite trope in fiction?

AND THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED!!!!! Also rivals coming together to fight a common enemy and then maybe coming together in a different way.....? That's good too.

Your favorite random fact?

There are vast, delicate fungal networks in the earth beneath our feet right now as we speak :) They wrap around tree roots and spread far and wide, connecting multiple trees with each other and allowing them to share water and nutrients. This is especially helpful for saplings, which often aren't able to get enough sunlight to make their own sugars. The fungal network helps ensure the survival of young trees, and in exchange it gets a share in the nutrients being passed between the trees!!!

Your favourite game or kind of game?

Saw trap.

A place you’d like to visit? (If carbon emissions, logistics and money weren’t in question)

Oh god literally anywhere. I want to get marinated in every culture and environment I think that would blow my mind in the best way. I do want to make it to Italy specifically at some point in my life because apparently I have cousins there? But then again what if they're weird and I don't actually want to meet them.....

An animal you’re irrationally afraid of?

I can't really think of any? As a kid I was terrified of big dogs, but that fear is like 99% gone now. Sometimes other people have their dogs off leash in the woods and I gotta say. I Do Not Like It when they come running up snarling barking jumping with their hair raised at me. But the vast majority of dogs are I encounter are nice, and when they aren't I just try to ignore them and keep walking lol.

What’s your favourite season?

Autumn 10000% and then winter. Then spring. Then summer. I hate being hot.

A smell that brings you nice memories?

So maybe this is weird but I really like the way horses smell? I was a farm girl growing up and always loved horses....a horse bit the top of my head once...a different horse broke my arm......still love them.

(If you’re ok talking about food. If not, delete this part) What’s your favorite food from where you were born? And what’s your favorite food from some place else?

My mom's Italian so it was all pasta all the time growing up...lasagna😭 Also chicken cacciatore but the pasta isn't the main event there. But yeah. Pasta tomato garlic basil.....I'm there babiee.

I'm also obsessed with Indian food and there's a place near me that has a vegetable korma that makes me cry.

What’s your favorite drink (if you drink alcohol, alcoholic and non-alcoholic)?

I don't drink alcohol anymore but I loooooooved rum & coke. Also hard cider.

As for regular drinks. I am 75% fruit juice by volume at all times.

Do you give your pets random table scraps?

My cat is a huge freak who turns her nose up at human food like she's literally too good for it. Sometimes I'll offer her a piece of cheese and she'll lick it, but that's it.

I don't know who has and hasn't been tagged already so if you want to do this. Do it🫵

[swearyshera]

Reliving this is a trip. I was an interesting feeling the first time thru, and I'm not saying that to humorously downplay a horrific situation. It drew out a little bit of sympathy for Catra I really thought I'd used up by that point, if only cuz what Prime does is really that vile. That's super unusual for me. I went in rooting for Adora to take back someone she cared about, not necessarily cuz it was Catra specifically if you know what I mean, but this got me to want Catra rescued weirdly well. I almost never feel for villains at their nadir like this.

Twisted how empathetic paragon heroes like Adora are among my most treasured characters in fiction, yet I suck at extending the same sympathy they can. You're supposed to see characters like Catra (or Azula or Bakugou or whoever you please) going thru awful things as flawed people with interior lives and subject to exterior circumstances that the heroes are kind/strong/savvy enough to see and incorporate into their responses and my knee jerk is still "fuck off with the pity party, get to the atonement." Or in a lot of cases to laugh while they're down. I always sabotage myself by seeing the author making horrible things happen to the rival/villains, and contrasting them with worse villains, as a cynical tactic to get me and the heroes to sympathize before they've started changing for the better.

It helped that Catra already saved Glimmer at her own peril, and Adora already would've saved Catra no matter what, but still. This is a big reason why villain mind control is one of my least fave tropes. Manipulation and coercion are all good because meaningful agency and responsibility are still there even if characters can't see it, and that is everything in my eyes. To me mind control is the writer hitting pause on a character's growth til a more convenient time in the plot. Or just forever. *cough*🌊🦂🧙‍♂️.

Most of my appreciation for pre-s5 Catra only built up in retrospect through meta-posts and following fanworks like this. So seriously thank you for this series; it's like experiencing the series as it was intended for the first time, weird as that sounds.

You're version of this sequence is as skin-crawling as I think we all could've hoped/feared. Prime is the worst kind of living scum. Great work. Now I can start counting down to the "you miscalculated." scene. Aimee Carrero crushed that line. Can't wait for your version. Positively dancing with anticipation.

It is - at least to me - a really interesting point for Catra to be at, narratively speaking, because it shows the dialectic in her journey. She both did and didn't "bring it upon herself" - yes, she tried to get in Prime's good books, but no, she didn't ask to be chipped. Yes, she saved Glimmer against his instruction, but no, she didn't know the full consequences of what that would do. And when you get people on different sides of the argument, some saying "poor meowmeow didn't deserve this" and others saying, "She's reaping what she's sown", actually they're both right, in this way.

I don't think it would have worked going straight to the atonement, anyway. We don't have these scenes to revel in the depth of her lowest point, we have them to show how bad, how inescapable it was - and then we set up to escape them!

The whole story with Prime has been an interesting writing journey, too. Every time I review the lines, I tweak them to make them that little bit more realistic, that little bit more uncomfortable. I'm painfully aware that we're seeing a lot of similar rhetoric flying around from real people in the media these days (particularly with anti-trans bullshit), and it's no coincidence that Prime is a reflection of this. But my focus isn't on "Oh look, doesn't this character sound like the person trying to destroy our lives", it's on "This character, like the people you've seen on the news, might think they're right but they will never win. They will never defeat us."

Indeed, the Save the Cat books (yes, this episode did remind me of them... It's probably where the name is from) talk about the 'All is Lost' point and the 'Dark Night of the Soul' - this is where we're at right now. It's bad, it's the worst - but it's going to get better.

[alanahsart-blog]

well of course i want to know abuot my best friend June: 🥊, 🧊, 🍀

YAAAAAY hehe Im so glad <3 best friend June time :]

🥊 -What do they love to do? What do they hate to do?

June is a weird little freak who actually enjoys and finds comfort in the mundanities of like... math. and business. (They're an accountant) It makes them feel like there's some order to their life and they find it relaxing. Absolutely bizarre. Of course, the root of their enjoyment of that is that it's sort of a destresser, so they also really enjoy getting to hang out with their friends, now that they have some that actually know them and are cool with them being a werewolf.

They are NOT a fan of interacting with anyone in a position to scrutinize them-- police, formal monster hunting organizations, stuff like that. At heart they are just some guy who doesn't like confrontation and doesn't really know how to deal with the scrutiny of mundane authorities. On a mundane note, since their senses are pretty strong, they are not a fan of strong smells and thus something like. Filling up the gas in their car sucks a little.

They have a paradoxical relationship with people relying on them-- on one hand, they love to feel like they can support and pay back the loyalty and kindness of their friends, but on the other hand, they are terrified of dropping the ball and letting people down, especially in life or death situations. This fear has come true several times, so they're currently kinda wrestling with a bit of an aversion to/guilt when it comes to taking on responsibility for others wellbeing-- they'll keep doing it tho <3

🧊 - Is their current design the first one?

More or less, yeah actually!! This is the first image I ever drew of June, (left) which isn't too different to my latest ref for them (right.) Looking back I definitely prefer the flowers on their jacket to be smaller. Gotta shrink those back down!

Divine vision or something 💥(they have since lost that gun. LMAO)

something that HAS changed about their design is a consequence of in-game events-- basically a large scar from getting blasted by undistilled magic from something called the wellspring. There was an instance in the mystery where this occurred where our gm described our characters sort of like.. mutated, messed up reflections as viewed through this magic, and in it described June as scaley green, so the "scar" they ended up with from getting blasted by it I interpreted as patches of scales :]. Makes hospital visits and beach days a little tough as you can imagine.

🍀 - What originally inspired the OC?

Well!!! June is my motw character and ofc was made for that purpose-- I'm a huuuuuge lover of monsters, spooky little guys, and generally fucked up characters, and so especially in a game where you're often going to be in conflict with those, I knew I wanted to make a character with the monstrous playbook.

I made them a werewolf ...... honestly mostly out of spite. LMAO. I have BIG problems with a lot of media depictions of werewolves, and thought this would be a great opportunity to do my take on a monster who I previously overlooked or didn't like because of how they were depicted in other stuff. In practice, they were definitely a combo of my own opinions about what would make a cool werewolf (a little uncanny, a little uneven and body horror-ish (it's a bit hard to tell in some pics, but they are kinda asymmetrical-- one sides a little more human and one's a little more wolfy,) mix of fangs and tusks and human teeth, overall monstrous silhouette rather than like. Actual Wolf or Hairy Guy With Slightly Strange Face)) and some traits about how they work drawn from medieval depictions and folklore (such as their time-frozen status, and the general Vibes of their look) :,3. I think it worked out very well personally, June is one of my favorite characters ever ever ever <3

[cherry-blossomtea]

Anyway, I’m going to talk about the directorial choices for the Meteia’s report in Ktisis Hyperboreia because it’s significant and points to the deeper nature of the characters in that scene. As Meteion describes the fallacy of four different worlds, we see the reaction of one of the four ancients and it seems to line up with known character themes. This allows us to make inferences about these characters—the game seems to be trying to say that the fallacy of each world is related to the greatest flaws or fears of that character.

Starting out of order to make my point—“One race had renounced war and devoted itself to the enrichment of its people. They were conquered. Though they destroyed the enemy in reprisal, they could not regain their former glory.” Hades has a very visceral reaction to this, and for good reason—it directly echoes who he becomes in Shadowbringers. While it's a stretch to say that the people of Etheirys were conquered, by the Meteia, Hydaelyn, Zodiark, or otherwise, they certainly were unable to attain the glory they lost in the Final Days 1.0. Emet-Selch's deepest character flaw is his inability to let go of the past, and we see exactly what his despair at losing the world he loved does to him. That 'reprisal' so to speak is the Ascians, and the rejoining, struggling to fight against Hydaelyn and restore what was lost.

“One race had striven to create a world bereft of animosity. They renounced relationships to avoid interpersonal strife and in so doing, brought about societal collapse.” While saying this, the camera focuses on Hermes. We don't know much about Hermes, but it's safe to say that he's renounced most relationships with the people around him, preferring to work with the creations of Elpis. Multiple characters make note of his self-isolating behavior. This race's destruction seems to point to Hermes' fatal flaw being related to his inability or unwillingness to get close to people out of the pain it might cause. The callousness of the people around him, renouncing even the intimacy of familial relationships as we get a glimpse of in Abyssos, was ultimately what led to his destruction

“One race had concluded that finite time was the root of all woes. Aspiring to shatter its shackles, they went in search of infinity. They discovered nothing is infinite and neither time nor death can be cheated. Disillusioned, they gave up on the future and themselves.” This one is a little more abstract, since we don't know much about him, but the camera does pan to Hythlodaeus who looks INCREDIBLY pained to hear this. Considering his response to the concept of 'death' as in, a finite ending, rather than the cyclical way that he explains life, death, and rebirth, the idea that the cycle could be broken would no doubt be jarring to hear indeed. Additionally, who of them would give up on himself? Hythlodaeus who had already rejected a seat on the convocation, who insists at every opportunity that he isn't as powerful or competent as those around him?

Finally, the fourth report: “One race had discarded all things which gave rise to sorrow, hoping to have only joy. They found joy lost its savor in the absence of sorrow and lost their will to live.” Venat's sorrow at the idea is plainly evident, and in fact, this very report from the Meteia likely influenced her decision to summon Hydaelyn and sunder the world into fourteen. She mirrors what the Meteia say in her speech just before doing so, saying "Suffering exists and we cannot pretend otherwise. No civilization, however great, could eliminate it. If we would live, we must accept it as our constant companion." Of the four, she took the message to heart as an opportunity to learn, to grow, rather than to submit to despair. That is why she was the light of hope that ultimately led to the salvation of Etheirys, even if that salvation meant destroying something in the process.

[justagalwhowrites]

hey bestie! 🫶 i wanted to ask you a question about your new tlou fic, yearling. without spoiling too much, would you be able to give any insight into what reader’s relationship with joel is gonna be like in this fic?

i’m asking bc honestly it was really hard for me to get past how joel treated her in lavender and normally i wouldn’t read something where joel is quite that mean. i started reading lavender pretty early on so i guess i was a little shocked at the turn his personality/relationship with reader took and i just want to be prepared before i start another fic like that (especially if it’s gonna be as long as lavender was and i will inevitably get attached to them lol)

i hope this doesn’t come off as mean or that you take this the wrong way bc you are honestly SUCH a talented writer like lavender was one the best-written fanfics i’ve ever read. and i like a little angst here and there but i just could not fully forgive lavender joel 😭 again this is NOT a critique of you or your writing. i’m just a big fat baby lmao

OK THANKS BYE 🫶

OMG Hi Bestie!!

Thanks so much for reaching out! I don't want you to be stressed or unhappy reading my stuff so I appreciate you asking :) Not really spoilers but insight into Yearling below the cut.

Joel is not going to be nearly as mean in this one. In Lavender, Joel was raw in his grief and trauma and his relationship with Doc fell victim to that. Yearling Joel has already started to heal. He's let himself love again with Ellie and is in a far better position to be emotionally vulnerable with Bambi than Lavender Joel was with Doc. Lavender Joel was doing everything he could to protect himself from that vulnerability until he was forced to reckon with losing her - the thing he feared most. On the flip side, Yearling Joel is going to kind of guide Bambi through her own recovery and self discovery as she learns how to trust and care about people again after her own trauma. This Joel is going to be much softer overall - still kind of standoffish and prickly but his soft and gooey center is much closer to the surface. And we will still have Feral!Joel show up a few times because I can't write Joel and not have him be feral at least twice lol

That's not to say that this won't be angsty because it definitely will! It's just not going to be rooted in Joel being cold and cruel as a trauma response.

I hope this helps! I appreciate you reading and sticking with Lavender through what I know was just an absolute pile of angst. While it was a romance and the story of found family, I originally started thinking about it in the terms of understanding what trauma does to our ability to love and the different ways the impact of trauma can radiate out into other aspects of our lives. Thank you for being here and for reaching out! Love you!