#i guess this is just growing pains | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

confinesofmy · 18 days

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for the first time in a long time, i threw together something to eat and it was actively bad. not because of parosmia or any other external thing, it just genuinely wasn't good. i barely finished it and was really glad it was one serving. #humbled

#think i might be going a little too crazy on the white pepper #also think i don't know rice vinegar well enough to just use it no recipe #and i fear i may also have a similar situation with tahini #yes tahini is just sesame seeds so where sesame seeds can go it can go #however! you have to keep in mind a teaspoon of tahini is 3.5 billion sesame seeds 😔 you must wield this power cautiously #i got really emboldened with that yum yum sauce the other day that was really really cool that i could just pull sauce out of the air #but that doesn't mean i can just slap together like 9 different ingredients 2 of which i'm not best friends with yet #and expect an incredibly delicious meal every time #just like 9/10 times lmao #adam yaps #i guess this is just growing pains #bc of my parosmia i can't just endlessly alternate between french and italian cooking principles #most of what i know is completely out the window without onions #so i'm having to cook in ways i historically have only experienced as a customer #and let me tell you. cooking was not 'coming naturally' to me before. i spent my first decade on earth as my mom's sous.#ofc i had a 'knack' when i started doing it solo #i have never soused for anyone cooking complex asian cuisine so unfortunately the 'knack' is not nearly as present u_u

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measuringbliss · 2 years

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People are acting so weird and possessive of Markiplier for the whole OnlyFans situation. He's an adult. He's an adult who's been a celebrity for years. He knows people thirst on him. That's why he had this idea in the first place. He's not some naive kid you must protect. He's not some innocent soul that the evil sluts of Tumblr and Twitter will corrupt. He knows the Internet, he knows his fans and he knows his job.

He's an adult and he can make his own choices.

#Markiplier #I've seen quite a few comments expressing discomfort and like. You can just. Not subscribe to his OF????#That's a possibility. You can block people too.#I think some of you really need to learn about parasocial relationships and reflect on it #He's not your dad #He's not your friend #He's just a dude #A dude who has a job and it just so happens that his job revolves around appearing personable #Don't forget that you don't truly know him and MORE IMPORTANTLY he doesn't know YOU #He probably has various ideas on xho his fans are as subgroups but he doesn't know you personally #Actually it reminds me of Maisee Williams in GoT s8 #People had seen her (the character and the actress) grow up over the years and when she decided she wanted to do a nude scene #A lot of people said they were uncomfortable #In both cases. They're adults. They can do whatever they want.#I guess that was a rant but sometimes I find the fandom really off-putting #Deactivated reblogs because the RBs were getting boring and a pain

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luck-of-the-drawings · 26 days

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smth smth about 'the thing that the character did that you thought was rly rly funny in the moment is actually linked to a terrible trauma that lies within said character.' or wahtever.

#jrwi show #jrwi fanart #jrwi riptide #gillion tidestrider #made this within a short span of wahtever bc i gotta go up to the mountains for my stupid gay job tonight n im trying #nnot to frrRREAAAK THE FUCK OUUTTTTTTi dont wanna work but. get that bread we fuckin shall i guess #ONWARDS TO THE FISH TORMENT!! sometimes flowers feel pain when you trim them before their blossoming. atleast i imagine so #i used to draw gillion with loooong hair tied into a big ol braid. and then it was confirmed that he had short hair when he was little.#AT FIRST I WAS SAD. but then i realized the duality of. when they were little. gill had short hair. edyn had long hair.#AND NOW THEYRE OLDER. and gillion has long hair. and edyn has short hair #both mirroring eachother. looking up to eachother. subconsciously or not. they most certainly care. and most certainly miss eachother.#GILLION ALWAYS LOVED HOW LONG HAIR LOOKs. atleast i imagine so. he hasnt cut it since he left the undersea. sure he wanted to go back home #but even at the very start. he knew he was free in some way now. free to grow out his hair. an adventure would await him before he returns.#he knew it would be a while. so he cant let this go. he cant let this sought-after hair-length get cut away from him again #not yet. not yet. i like to think he loved music too. I SAW SOMETHING INTERESTING A BIT AGO #i see alot of ppl commenting on my baby gill comics like;'i wouldFIGHT this teacher i wanna KILL EM i want them DESTROYED #all very good and nice sentiments! i LOVE the energy here! and it would be nice. to have that catharsis #but the story of young tidestrider is not a story of catharsis. it is a story of agony and being so so small and so special and also so dum #and sucking so bad. and just being a kid and doing the things that a little kid does and so many tired tired people reacting badly to it #youre supposed to be the hero that will save us. our world hangs in the balance and you are the one who tips the scales.#YOU are supposed to SAVE US!! you NEED to SAVE US! CAN YOU PLEASE STOP SQUIRMING IN YOUR STUPID CHAIR!!#you'd think that young tidestrider ought to prevail. and be tucked someplace all safe and sound.#elders gone missing and rotting in a jail. their cultists nowhere around. but theres no happy endings. not here not now.#this tale is all sorrows n woes. you may dream that justice n peace win the day. but thats not how this story goes #BIG ideas for this lil baby gillion series. if anything i make ever gets disproven im killing myself in a well as to poison a water supply

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screwpinecaprice · 10 months

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I know it’s not a question but i can’t help but appreciate the fact that you draw adult Steven as a chubby guy! We big boys need some positive representation in here. Also, i’ve been following you for almost a year now!

Btw sorry for my English lol.

Hi! It's very pleasing to know you've been around for as long! 😁😁😁 I absolutely appreciate the appreciation! And no worries, your English is super fine! 😁 (Relatable actually. I am also apologizing in advance if I can't exactly have my point clearly across because I'm not well at English myself! lmao)

It took me quite some time to learn how to draw chubby characters but it's so satisfying to have eventually. ( *`u*) (I mean, there's still so much to learn, but still.)

Having a chubby main protagonist is so wonderful to have. And a good kid at that. (Ngl I'm attracted to kindness. haha So of course it's very important to me that he's fat AND kind.)

Also design-wise, I personally think it fits his character so well. Soft and huggable, shaped like a friend. Thick arms to hug people with snuggly. Body wide like a shield. etc. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

And I just really like to capture these elements when I draw him as an adult. Also that it's just fun to draw.

Simply personal thoughts about it, nothing against any other ways he's being portrayed by others of course.

#And it's not even because English isn't my first language. Just generally bad at language. RIP #I had this conversation with someone once where they headcanon he'd get lower back pains if he slim down because of how his gem will #poke or stab his spine #I really like that he's chubby/fat just because. and that he's happy and confident about it #but him being fat not entire by choice is an interesting angle to look at.#I mean obviously he's naturally chubby because of DNA too but you get when I mean. or I hope you do. ;u;#Yo I had a theory.... or at least a headcanon about how his gem is arranged inside his body and how it's practically designed so it can be #passed down eventually without killing him. But I never get to a cohesive written explanation about it so I kept procrastinating.#I like to think the Pink Diamond gem will become like an heirloom. But I digress.#Steven Quartz Universe #Connie Maheswaran #I guess implied connverse #connverse #TFW growing up in media where 'look at us we're different but we are all friends!' And the differences were just personalities and status i #society but the body shapes are practically the same. 😆#They were the same shape because the merch used the same mold. ^^; But I think that contributed to messing up my perception.#Like. The level of unawareness I had in drawing fat characters is crazy back then.#when I thought I drew a chubby character but the reality was that she was still slim! I still have her saved in my Deviant Art account #Nobody would've known because she's my OC.#If I were to argue with that past me that she's not chubby. Past me would be extremely confused because she is totally convinced that she #drew a chubby character. Mind you I was above 18 then too.#I had another OC I wanted to be really chunky but I was so bad at it that I found an excuse why she's so slim so I can avoid drawing chunky #I did eventually made her chunky but I almost never posted any of my OCs lol. She also have a black and pink theme. 🤔#Same with skin color but it happened in my own Sona. I have a tan skin tone and I thought I gave my Sona the same skin...but like... Bruh.#I'm even looking at it now. That is kinda pale. RIP #It still baffles me how different I've been seeing thing in the past. Eugh I'm digressing again. :/#sc answers #ask #luisnavarro04 #meme

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mspaint-flower · 1 year

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「　何を要りますか？　」

#vflower #v4 flower #v4flower #vocaloid #vocaloid flower #my art #my designs #<- technically #ms paint #medical #man i love medical stuff. i wanna be a nurse when i grow up i'm sorry #try to guess my favourite utau challenge!#also doing ''filters'' on ms paint is so pain. like they're not even filters #you just manually do it. it's a pain but it's fun to play with colours like that #also listen to okusuri nonde neyo

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lonereaper · 3 months

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Anyone else feeling stagnated as fuck in their current situation yet are terrified of the possibilities of change? Just me? ok....

#ok to rb i guess wharterver #This post is inspired by the pain of seeing my dad depressed and knowing that if i stay in this home that i'll never grow and change #Yet hesitating to since according to him he gets up in the morning because of me.#I want to go to this college because I know that i'll thrive in a different situation #A place where I'll know people my age and where I'll do things that I love #Yet both him and I are hesitant because of different thiings #I'm scared to leave him alone and he's afraid because of the way my mental health worsened the last time I went to college #Things are tough right now but i know i just have to hold out #Do things I'm afraid of doing.

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tuhbanbuv · 8 months

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What do you get when you mix childhood nostalgia with your preteen/teenage angst? This fucking thing.

I’ve been brainstorming more ideas for my LBP fanfic “Growing Pains”, kinda trying to work a sorta alternate take on Sackboy.EXE. Something along the lines of Sackboy (or Fry in this AU) having their negative emotions compacted into a villain blah blah blah.

#ngl Growing Pains is really personal to me #lets just say not all of it was purely fictional #sackboy/fry is sort of a self insert but not really for me in that fic #idk how to describe it #tw vent #I guess???#lbp #lbp3 #lbp2 #sackboy a big adventure #sackboy #little big planet #littlebigplanet #saba #lbp fanart #banbuv's art #traditional art

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asjjohnson · 2 months

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I've finished the bottle of pain killers I bought in November. haha, I guess I hadn't needed to worry about their short expiration date. (I already bought more, by the way)

I thought it would've helped a bit more for this morning's headache. (if I didn't think it would also increase the risk of side effects I would drink some coffee to increase the dose.)

If I'm not careful, one of these days during a headache I'll tell a doctor to go ahead and crack my head open.

...When not having a headache, I want to avoid that.

(but I'll probably be fine soonish. Just whining a bit. Despite the headaches having been getting more mild over these months, I seem to be getting more sensitive. I guess I'm just tired of it.)

(...pondering risking the internal bleeding and other bad side effects of a coffee boost. ...But then again the taste/smell of coffee might make me throw up. :/ )

#the brain scan I'd insisted on showed a tiny little bump. too small yet to push against anything. I shouldn't be able to feel it.#It's probably a red herring but that's what sawing my head open would be for if I were to impulsively do it.#...of course; if I did; I would have headaches for possibly months after from the surgery itself. ...maybe worse ones.#...and I don't want part of my head shaved. It's even where I part my hair. It takes at least seven years to grow back!#there's also the likely ridges and scars; and infections. And chance of damaging part of the brain.#I wanna leave it be unless it becomes daaangerous. don't consider it. it's probably not even related to the headaches.#...coffee boost? ...I'm probably just feeling pressurey now instead of pain-pain though. Medicine doesn't help with that. :/#...I'm probably imagining it into hurting more by focusing on it so much.#...or maybe lying in bed is why. I should probably not be horizontal. ...but I also don't wanna get up. getting up might hurt too. I don't #aah it's getting boring I guess I'll get up. ...very slowly.

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aggressive-almond-cookie · 3 months

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There are days when I wish my memory would be wiped just so I could play octo expansion for the first time again.

#splatoon #aiko plays squid games #it just gave me so many hyper specific emotions I cannot begin to articulate #though I guess also if my memory was wiped I wouldn't have all the emotional background prefacing it #how much it meant for me to tackle that challenge and come out on top #how so much of it was peppered with corrupted pieces of my childhood #an echoed atmosphere of what I was pursuing #by some standards #so much later in life than most people do #it meant something to me I can't even grasp it to explain it #this time my persistence meant something #my pain meant something #I am clever but I am stubborn and insatiably curious and that means I will learn a lot of lessons in the hardest way #and that's not something that makes me lesser. It's something that gives me an incredibly rich array of life experiences.#I am capable and I am resilient and I'm always growing #sorry I think I had too much coffee my mind is racing lol

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cerealmonster15 · 4 months

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ok ok ok also hitting my demons back with a broom maybe ill upload the next chapter after i read thru it,,, i could trap myself in "it's not good enough and badly paced" limbo forever but i have GOT to remember i am doing this FOR FUNSIES and also to TRY SOMETHING NEW and LEARN AS I GO so it's gotta be ok if i do it bad!!!!!!!!

#im figuring it out!! growing pains!!!#my friend said she liked it lol #and MAYBE im my own worst critic #but wow it's so scary with like #people reading chapter one and saying they look forward to more #like WHAT IF THE REST IS BAD #im also second guessing that maybe not enough /different/ stuff happened in this chapter #like did it progress enough...............#SHH. NO. TOO BAD IF IT DIDNT IM FIGURING IT OUT!!!#sorry i HAVE to fight with myself every step of the way on everything i do ever thats just how it goes

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laugtherhyena · 5 months

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Csm thoughts,,

#Putting these in tags cuz they're rather negative and like this people can ignore this if it shows up on search #anyways today i was showering and had a realization that like #if csm part 2 didn't exist and the manga had ended in chapter 97 i really wouldn't mind that. like at all #because so far there hasn't been anything in part 2 that stuck to me in such a way that i would be upset or miss it if it didn't exist #be it arcs world building (not big on religious allegories. that prophecy stuff really doesn't intrest me at all) or characters #in fact if it did end on the publig safety saga i probably would have liked it better #because then it would have ended and that's it. because part 2 exists i can see the story move foward #with the absence of almost everyone from part 1 and i just. miss them #so reading part 2 in general makes me inherently a little sad #and i feel like that's what blocks me from enjoying it or even growing to care for the new characters from part 2 #because i don't care for any of them that much. not even asa and yoru #and this isn't me being mad at the story for killing people off. i think all deaths in part 1 happened exactly where they needed to #and the story is beautifully crafted. i just genuinely miss them #and see denji staggering about looking so tired all the time barely looking like the same guy from part one due to everything that happened #that also makes me fell just. like this pain in my chest that i can't even explain well #i don't dislike part 2 i don't think it's bad #it's just not for me and i don't think that will change anytime soon #tho i will still look up the new chapters because i wanna see what happens. tho if there ever is a part 3 i doubt i will bother reading it #hyena ramblings #rant? i guess?

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sourkitsch · 1 year

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The fact that the only thing that’s kept me from killing myself the past few months is the fact that a famous art critic said that he’d be keeping an eye out for me. Thanks dude.

#adding to the complexes & such.#actually the amount of pressure & expections that literally every adult in my life seem to be placing on me??????#hold on I’m literally working something out right now #obviously are fucking insane considering what the expectations of me growing up were #I am literally not well equipped to be handling this much positive attention which is why I’ve been having an existential crisis every other #week like clockwork #like I can TELL my professors think I’m gonna shoot out of college into a gallery career #and the expectations I was raised with and the art people expectations and my own plans are all rubbing up against each other #in really painful ways #i need to be back in therapy #if you read all that. thanks I guess #also I’m never not suicidal it’s honestly something I live with just know I’ll mention it from time to time #not currently in a place where I’m actually gonna yknow . do anything. sparkle on

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kazoologist · 8 months

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I actually really fucking hate how anything in my schedule not going the way I initially Intended For It To just automatically makes me a massive fucking crybaby and or a raging bitch. Like dude. The grocery store does not hate me. It sucks that my schedule requires me to get there an hour earlier no matter what but like. They didn’t do that to me. Why am I always so upset whenever I have to change plans. I change plans too! I’m a living person!!! Why am I so fucking upset about this!!!!!!

#personal #im gonna delete this later I’m just venting #I’m also fine I’m just having a rough day and I can’t figure out why my emotions have been so fucking volatile. It’s so frustrating that #I can’t figure out how to get a handle on my emotions. I know I need to feel things but the problem is if I let myself feel them too much #Then I’m going to spiral or lash out at some random bystander and both of these make the initial feeling worse #I just can’t pull myself out of that quickly enough recently. It’s not an issue of ability bc I can. I just can’t do it.#wait that’s contradictory. I’ve been really struggling too recently. There we go. There’s accuracy.#Either way. Didn’t I spend all year in therapy last year trying to get this shit together? What the fuck.#Why is it the second I show a modicum of progress I immediately hit a single pebble on the road and get sent ass over teakettle #Progress isn’t linear but it also sure as hell isn’t meant to be a time loop. That I’m pretty sure of.#God everything’s just been so difficult this year. Shit that used to be almost instinctual to me now is a nightmare.#Maybe it’s growing pains and I guess that’s valid but how long do I have to have them #The good news is that thus far I have not snapped at anyone so at least right now we don’t have any casualties of my bad attitude #I feel so bad being so worried about that but like seriously no one needs me to be snapping at them. Even if I feel catharsis in the moment #We all feel bad immediately afterwards #It’s literally not even been a bad day today. I cannot emphasize how this has been the only problem today. Literally so much good happened #Ugh #dont look at me

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peapod20001 · 8 months

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I am the nail growth self saboteur!!

#random post #guess who rammed their hand in a wall and broke off the literal short nail on their hand?? this guyy #I’m prone to ramming parts of my body into things. it’s comical really #like a week ago I somehow bashed my hip into a drawer handle. because that’s how I roll 😎#it hurt bad enough to shock me into silence </3 I got scraped bad enough for my parents to go ‘GASP. PEAA!!!! WHAT DID YOU DOOO???’#read that in concerned parent voice if u would #it’s funny when I get hurt or do smth bad and I’m asked why I’d do that. like we both don’t know I function like a scarecrow brought to life #and learning to walk with no bones or muscles HHFSCREE #it’s fine now pain only hurts in like the first few moments and then it’s chill #got off topic there but anywayssss yea :> I’m just glad it was the one that was already broken an not a longer one #I’m surprisingly optimistic I’ll have u know. contrary to popular belief #adhd moment but do u ever think how we’re the first generation that will grow up and grow old on the internet?#do u ever think about what that’ll mean for us? or what it looks like? will there be a time when we just don’t log on ever again?#I also sometimes think of the internet graveyard. the millions of accounts that are no longer used either by choice or by some other #circumstance like passing away. I think we’ll only know when the future generations see a post by someone with a date 100 years in the past #these aren’t negative thought they’re just thoughts I have. a negative thought would be me wondering who will tell the world I’m gone so I’m #not waited on. obviously that’s not a problem I hate to worry about now but then intrusive thoughts do be intruding. anyways yea when I’m #gone at like. 80 (?) I’ll release my creations into the wild for people to do whatever with. it’ll be like an intrusive species lmfao my #impact on the world will be fucking up the online ecosystem forever #ok I’m done rambling now lol did you know I was holding a muffin while typing this entire thing? one handed I might add!! the chaos can’t #be contained no matter how much adderall u pump in me

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wrecking · 8 months

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edit: i ended up just ranting abt like the current vibe™ in the tags... sorry abt that but like also whatever i don't care anymore

#d #my food therapist really said the most real thing on planet earth when she said i'm meeting me at the same time everyone else is #i feel like a cringey overzealous emotionally dumb teenager who's a total embarrassment to everyone around me while i'm trying 2 say fuck i #cuz like this is the first time in my entire life i feel like i get to actually explore my identity and do like normal young people things #and i feel just. so so exposed in the sense that everyone is watching me make a fool of myself without a single shred of self-awareness #and it makes me so fucking mad cuz like i'm finally happy with myself!! i'm finally starting to feel like a fully formed person #instead of a 2d projection or an object or something monstrous hiding in the shadows because that's how i've spent until now imo #and like. it's hard to emotionally make peace with the fact things in my social life are changing because like. there's some part of me #that thinks that maybe if i stayed in that miserable place that maybe i wouldn't have any of the problems i have now #and like my life is a lot better. and i know that and i wouldn't change a thing. but like emotionally i guess i'm just #processing it as a fault of mine to have changed bc it's changing my relationships to others #and this isn't about any one specific thing like i've been having lots of small growing pains with a lot of ppl in my life rn i just am lik #there's a lot happening to me rn emotionally so i feel like everything i do is a fuckup and i'm just bracing for more people to go ig #which might happen or it might not and tbh either is ok at this point. i need to do this in order to live i think #idk why i'm even rambling about this i just have a lot of thoughts and i want to share them i guess. not like it does anything but like #what else is this app for at this point lmfao i barely even want to talk on here anymore because i feel like everything i say on here is #just pointless. i'm thankful i have a strong support system rn cuz genuinely i don't know what i'd do if i didn't like #i feel like everything is so much more emotionally Big to me on E and it's kind of hard trying to figure out how to manage it #like i'm basically finally getting to be me. for worse AND for better. and i just am like. insecure on some level i guess #not even over my appearance tbh i've kinda made peace with that. moreso my personality and what things i share with others #this whole post is so wholly unnecessary but i feel like i'm going to go insane if i don't get this out of my head #i've genuinely been avoiding talking about my emotions or my private life on here because i don't exactly feel safe on here anymore #which is like great. love it when my primary outlet for like. socially interacting with people casually gets compromised i love it #i literally softblocked like 30 ppl off of here so i could talk abt my weird sex stuff and my body and my deeper thoughts with ppl i trust #and then i still am too conscious about it! this always happens when i make a blog for myself to talk on #maybe i'm just not meant for talking abt things

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angeltannis · 1 year

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when people used to say “You can tell when Hasbro started pandering to bronies” about FiM’s run, I used to say that wasn’t true at all. now I’m rewatching the series and yeah lol you can definitely feel the shift

#mlp #Slice of Life is almost incomprehensible if you weren't deeply rooted in early 2010s brony fandom culture #back in the day watching that ep on a livestream with thousands of other bronies we were all like THIS IS THE BEST EPISODE EVER #recently i saw someone on here saying it sucked and i was like holy shit but that episode is so good??#then i went back and rewatched it and sldfsdf . Yeah it's kinda just Fandom Pandering: The Episode #which tbf is what it was Intended to be as like a 'thank you' for 100 episodes and stuff #but like. man. how did they get away with that lmao #not to mention how violent the villain fights got as the series progressed #and other things like that #i do think overall the series benefitted from having lots of adults that cared about it but i guess it wasnt without its growing pains #in any case it doesnt seem to have affected G5 at all bc they went right back to 'kids are stupid we dont need to put any effort in' lol

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