Faux fur (you are literally an opossum in my mind. Like when I see you on my dash I think “oh it’s the possum again :D”. I imagine you have a tiny keyboard and glasses perched on your snout.)
Mariana (you get a cool rock and/or leaf with this ask)
Stained Bathroom Sink (the mental image of a possum seriously reading hair dye directions, nose scrunched up and the paper directions unfolded full length like an old-timey newspaper was too good to not share)
(Sorry if the gifs are weird, my internet’s not loading them all the way so I’m going based off a still image)
Literally no words can accurately express how much I love this,, I'm am just. Everything about this ask,,,, <3
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actually annabeth joining luke's army as a double agent for chb but percy doesn't know this so he just thinks alright and grabs grover and hooks it over there bc annabeth does what she wants and he knows there's no convincing her otherwise bc she's a stubborn ass and also ares fucking sucks so as far as percy's concerned the gods can suck it based on that alone
grover is just ??? bc he does NOT want to be over here and percy's just like "look, we can't convince annabeth to not be part of monster army, so the only option is to be part of it ourselves" and annabeth walks in on them trying to join (or rather percy trying to join for both of them and grover looking on the verge of tears) and she's just ??? bc what the fuck percy why are you two here
whole time percy is going on a rant about ares and how he sucks and how he's pretty sure the god has abused clarisse ("maybe we should get clarisse to sign up with us") because no one believes that he wants to join luke's army and they just thinkk he wants to spy on them so he's trying to show that he thinks gods (well at least one god) is a total ass and can get obliterated and percy will be happy to do that bc he did it once before, he can totally do it again! and if they get clarisse she can deliver the final blow as an FU
someone asks why grover's there and percy is like "um. he's my best friend? he has to come with me? what, you think I'm gonna fucking fight my best friend? are you stupid?"
meanwhile grover is having the worst panic attack of his life. like why is this how he discovers percy has no morals. couldn't it be something smaller like putting french fries in a strawberry milkshake?
and annabeth is resisting the urge to start screaming and now she's gotta vouch for percy and her vouch for percy is basically "if it came to saving me and grover or a bus full of people about to plunge into the atlantic, percy would save us, no hesitation" and everyone's like "jesus christ, the hell is wrong with this kid" because like maybe they're on the side of a cannibalistic titan but they're not fucking evil
ofc once they're let into the group, annabeth drags them both to the side and wrings percy a new one for fucking up her double agent plans and they're both whisper-arguing bc it's not his fault he didn't know she didn't really shack up with the enemy, but like fuck off percy, you didn't have to follow me here! why the hell would you choose to come here, were you going to try and kidnap me and bring me back to camp by force??
and percy is just like "yes that is 100% what i was going to do, i was definitely not joining with the intent to be by your side and blow up olympus because i'd rather destroy the world than fight my friend" and grover turns to annabeth and is just "he's fucking lying" "yeah i know"
anyway grover is released as a double agent for the monster army (but actually for CHB) bc the idea is that he can help them get more demigods to their side as a searcher being sent out to grab kids and he's mentally banging his head bc NOW he has to figure out how to get unclaimed demigods safely to camp without making it look like he took them there on purpose and if it looks like he defected back to CHB, they'll probably kill annabeth and maim or imprison percy and good gods, percy i hate you so much rn
percy? idk. it's past summer so he just goes home and luke is like "bro you can't just fucking leave" "um no offense luke but if you try to stop me from going home to my mom who i love more than life itself i will legit eat you" and then he goes home
come december, grover is calling percy up like "hey i found these fucking powerful ass kids, plz help me get them to camp without making it look like i got them there on purpose" and so they gotta loop annabeth in who's just mentally banging her head and cursing percy out over this whole thing as she strategizes a way to get the army there but have them fuck up so badly it would look super suspicious if grover just shoved them over
so first she yells at percy then she makes grover call thalia up so she can help him and it'll be okay 'cause she's in the same area as him so it won't look suspicious, it'll just seem like camp sent her in with him, like they do sometimes when there's dangerous monsters that a satyr might not be able to handle by themselves.
and then she makes percy go with them as support for grover's "nefarious" deeds since thalia's there. and it's a whole fucking thing, and mentally she's just like "oh thank fuck" when artemis and the hunters show up.
they retreat back to wherever the monster army was at this time (not the boat, but like idk. atlas' post? were they all chilling there or was it just luke and some ppl being assholes and everyone else was still on the boat, i can't remember) and curse their loss of two powerful and clueless demigods, only for percy to call annabeth up a couple hours later like "hey, remember those kids from a couple hours ago with the manticore and the hunters and everything"
"percy it was two hours ago, ofc i remember it, my memory isn't as shit as yours" "right right, you're elephant" "oh my- why are you calling me!!" "oh yeah. uh. well. they're kinda in my house" "what??" "yeah they're sitting right across from me. my mom's giving them some hot chocolate."
"how the hell?"
"i have no clue. they also have no clue. they just, uh, didn't feel safe at camp, bc grover was being weird about trying to save them. which, um, yeah, makes sense. and they don't like thalia because her spear scares them 'cause they don't like lightning. and also the girl said the hunters keep trying to convince her to join them which is freaking her out, so they didn't want to stay at camp. and then suddenly they were in my house."
"..."
"what do i do?"
this time annabeth bangs her head physically on the closest wall. and somewhere in the fine forests of new york, grover is banging his head on the nearest tree, both of them unified in their feelings of "for fucks sake percy i hate you so much rn"
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A recent addition to this fic/AU as it’s slowly being written:
The property that House and Wilson’s ‘farmhouse’ is on is a frequent hunting ground of many local stray cats. The cats love to greet Wilson (whether by rubbing up against him or just walking near him) when they see him, so Wilson starts leaving food out for them in return. There’s five or six ‘regulars’ that individually stop by at different times during the day/week.
After Wilson dies, House finds it hard to continue Wilson’s habit of feeding the cats. He does it when he has the energy to get around to it (which isn’t often, since the entire thing reminds him of Wilson, after all), but he’s nowhere near consistent with it. Still, the cats keep coming, even when Wilson is no longer around. After House brings Thirteen to his place, she ends up taking up the torch of leaving food out for the cats on her own, without being asked or knowing that it was something Wilson did.
Eventually, Thirteen mentions the cats to House. She finds out that they’ve been around for a while, are fairly fond of House (for the most part, even if House pretends not to be fond of them), and that House and Wilson even gave them names. The cats are as follows:
Robbie, a fluffy golden cat that’s bigger than the others, highly affectionate, and was the first to approach Wilson;
Remy, a willowy, clever, and slightly elusive brown tabby;
Foreman, a disgruntled gray cat that looks about two seconds away from committing murder at any given moment, and who will swat at House if he gets too close;
Foster, a playful young tuxedo who is the reason why there’s a basket full of cat toys, mainly purchased by Wilson, on the front porch (his full name is Lawrence, but he is only ever called by his nickname);
and finally, a tortoiseshell with piercing blue eyes that watches House with a startling level of awareness and responds to “Cutthroat Bitch”.
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