#i know how to show a lady a good time

[enzomancer]

[luck-of-the-drawings]

[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]

saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.

[glacialswordsman]

decided to draw a ref for how i view my yaya since i have bunches of headcanons for him

i'll put it in the headcanon masterpost but i'll give him an individual post too

pls DO NOT rb bc i dont want it getting out further than my circle aslkdjaslfj thank yewww <3

[kyolypso]

NEW GREAT PRETENDER MOVIE IS SO GOOD BTW.

[crown-ov-horns]

I said I have 4 storylines of Good Omens fanfiction (including the Crossover with Legion). Had I said that today, I would've lied. There's five.

["Diary entry" under the cut, so there's no litany on an unwilling scroller's feed]

NOTE: I haven't seen S2 of GO, not do I intendt to, so beware of canon divergence

Well... The 5th one is less a coherent storyline, more a concept. I was playing Gardenscapes, and suddenly thought "What if F!Crowley were my Antichrist's mother?"

You know, maybe Crowley owed Satan a new Antichrist, or something. I guess, she'd have screwed up this one, too... Well, she'll gladly take over the world, she just won't destroy it.

The conversation (between myself and myself) went about like this:

Me: ...

Also me: what if?..

Me: for fuck's sake, not again

Also me: Lady Crowley...

Me: please stop

Also me: Was Maxine's mother?

Me: whyever would she be her mother?

Also me: because she owed Satan for the ruined Apocalypse, and had to carry the next Antichrist

Me: Maxine doesn't want the Apocalypse, she's a sane politician

Also me: works for Crowley

Me: she also has black hair and blue eyes

Also me: Satan has black hair and blue eyes, Benedict's not his faceclaim, anyway

Me: fine, why would her last name be Frost?

Also me: Satan goes by Lucian Frost on Earth

Me: why would he ever go by the surname Frost?

Also me: a not to Dante's Inferno

Me: I hate you

Also me: 🤪

Me: you're killing me

Also me: with pleasure 😊

[End dialogue.]

Now, like I always do with any new idea, I of course collapsed down into the daydreaming pit, which often turns fanfiction, and original stories alike, into Tolkien-level complex universes you'd need a lifetime to fully explore.

I thought, it could be funny. When Max meets Anathema and Newt's daughter Agnes in Oxford, they can bond over their unhinged families.

"You'll probably think my parents are weird as fuck, they have a pet raccoon they dye black, and pretend is a cat."

"Honey, no, I get you. My mother mentally abuses her house plants, and wears sunglasses at midnight."

Rich people things, I guess. I mean, they're both nepo babies, who would ask questions about why their families are weird. Who would ask questions about why a rising star politician's mother mentally abuses her house plants.

There's a lot of potential for comedy. Crowley's issues with her sister-in-law, for example. Satan and Michael... They have a strange dynamic. The last time they spoke to each other is mentioned in the Book of Jude. But, they both have the familia ante omnia, blood is everything mentality. They support each other's political aim. They would kill for each other. And, Michael feels very protective (possessive, even) over her niece (the family mediator, why do you think she's a perfect diplomat). It would annoy the Hell (Heaven?) out of Crowley. Still, in the end, she and Michael would probably kill for each other, also.

I'd imagine Satan forbidding any contact with his disowned son... I don't know. In my fanfictions (where he is a thing), Maxine and Adam usually do have eventual contact, and consider themselves siblings (do keep in mind, though, Max would always choose her father over her brother). Satan doesn't mind her not wanting the Apocalypse, as long as she's loyal to him. He sees good points in her arguments against. He never really cared for it, anyway, it was mostly the armies.

Also... Maxine rides horses, ever since she was a child. Crowley doesn't get along with animals, everyone knows that. But. She's the nightmare equestrian mom (think soccer mom, only worse - much worse). How does she get along with Max's animals?.. Well, Titan (the hellhound) actually likes her. Ulysses (the horse) tolerates her. Horus (the falcon - yes, Max's so posh she's in the falconry hobby)... I have no idea. He'd probably sit on her shoulder, sometimes. But, Crowley's anxious around him, since snakes aren't usually friends with raptors.

At first, I thought about conflict between Crowley and Maxine. For example, her refusing to ride in the Bentley, because she (every author must place pieces of them in their characters) despises Queen. But... I don't like writing that. I like writing loving, healthy relationships between mothers and daughters. So, it's more "What do you mean you're bad at being a demon? You caused the Fall of Humankind. None of them can compare to you", and"You'll be the perfect Secretary-General of the United Nations, honey". We love mothers and daughters supporting each other here. ❤

I even thought of cute scenarios, like Crowley coiling in Max's crib, because she's anxious, and wants to protect her baby.

Max is fiercely protective of Crowley. That's why she'd be in conflict with Beelzebub - funny enough, for a similar season to the other stories (Beelzebub causes the death of her adoptive mother, after she realizes she's raising the Antichrist). Beelzebub hates Crowley, and the Beast of Rev. will show her very sharp teeth, should someone threaten her mom. Satan's on his family's side, don't worry.

Actually... You know why this story is cool? Horrific things happen to Crowley in my other fics. Not this one. Actually, she's doing great. She's the Queen of Hell. Damn... She'd outrank Beelzebub. She could terrorize... Her? Like I said, I haven't seen S2, Ι don't know the pronouns, and I don't care, you can get them right if it matters to you (I just know in S2 an actress from Bridgerton played her (?)).

As for Satan/Crowley... As long at Crowley's female, I don't mind it. I like it. Good for you, you little serpent tempter. Because, you know I always romanticise the Devil.

Have I any ideas for smut? You bet I do. I even have crack ideas... You know that picture of a female wolf protecting a male wolf's throat? Think that, but Crowley's coiled around Satan in her snake form, and snaps at anyone who wanders close.

So, I let this out into the web. Now I'll have to actually do it. Wish me luck. 😑

[undermostcorgi]

ANOTHER ONE

[musical-chick-13]

Also I want to point out that there ARE some horrible women in fiction that I genuinely don't like. Like the girl from fucking Oreshura.

[healingheartdogs]

Also the malinois person (h*rdybunch) on that malinois service dog post is literally one of the people I have worked with in person who had a mal SD that I am talking about specifically saying their dog DEFINITELY should have been washed. Their previous malinois SD was dog reactive and I personally watched that dog attack multiple other dogs unprovoked INCLUDING ONE OF MY DOGS AT MY OWN HOME when they temporarily lived with us in 2020. They also admitted in 2020 in discord to other SD handlers when discussing Mallow that she had snapped at children in public before and that they didn't consider it a problem worth correcting because she only did it when they were stressed, which is absurd and unacceptable in general but especially given that a large part of their disability is psychiatric and being in public greatly stressed them out by their own admittance. Mallow was actually ILLEGAL for them to be working by ADA standards for SDs because of her reactivity making her dangerous to the public and to other SDs. They should definitely not be giving out advice about service dogs because they knew that the whole time they were working her (she continued being worked for years after all this stuff in 2020) and they intentionally hid it from the general public.

That person is literally my #1 example of why protection breeds SHOULD NOT BE SERVICE DOGS and why I do not trust people who work them as SDs because they are almost always ignoring behaviors that make their dog unfit for SD work. Please stop listening to them about service dog stuff jfc.

[maximus-gluteus]

nothing to see here

[luck-of-the-drawings]

OH ARTHUR BENNETT.. such a gorgeous and intriguing character. terribly burdened by a GRUESOME set of crimes, his light suffocated by a HEAVY century of GUILT. so tragic, so dark and broody, and yet PAINFULLY awkward in any social setting ever

[wizardnuke]

what's funnier for a meet-ugly fic. if it's a meet-ugly from the start ("we first met each other in a holding cell") or if it starts cute ("my grocery bag tore open on the street and they helped me pick everything up, also I got their number") and then gets ugly ("I didn't call them because I was busy and five days later we met again, in a holding cell")

[idkbecks]

[istherewifiinhell]

hows the show where they give the turtles love interests going... well. well. the one of them that is the birth daughter of the boys adopted father... is a snake now.

[floral-hex]

oof, super cute emo girl with big mushroom earrings working at the gas station, and then I saw her a couple of hours later at the walmart nearby 😩

[silverselfshippingchaos]

goodness I love him so much

[consciouschunkofmoss]

the creativity has striken and now my coccyx hurts like hell