#i like the contrast between the two word 'art piece title' and me immediately screaming in the tags

[suntails]

unapproachably pretty

[sembrais]

The New In between the Old- Santurce

The New In between the Old- Santurce, San Juan

    As I arrived at the Sagrado Corazón station (commuting on the train). Sagrado Corazón is a common space for the Santurce community since public transportation defines the environment a lot. From this, we can have some sort of insight into the socio-economic structure of the space. I headed to the bus stop to wait for the bus that would take me through the Ponce de León Avenue which is part of the area of Santurce. As I wait in the hot sun standing under a tiny piece of shade reflected by the roof of the already occupied small seating, I observe that I was mainly standing in between old people, with the occasional young person being a student or a worker. Despite the contrast in age, a common quality I’ve spotted in all these people is a sense of drainage, maybe due to the incompetence of public transportation or simply because of day to day personal matters. I presence two people selling sweet treats to sustain their families or themselves; one was a man who happened to be on the train with, whom I had purchased one of his packed “besitos de coco” who happened to be waiting for the same bus as I, and later on a lady selling chocolate wafer bars. Both people emitted a sense of desperation to get people to help them, a scream for compassion. After a tiresome wait, the bus finally arrives and I aboard for my adventure through the city.

    Staring through the window the images I first perceive are people roaming through the sidewalks mainly middle-aged men, students and abandoned structures covered in graffiti/ street art. In between these buildings, I start to spot “revamped” or shall I say new spaces that have made their way into the community. I decided to get off a stop close to Ciudadela, “The reimagination of what a city should be.” according to the structure’s philosophy. When I got off the bus two things captured my attention, a new modern café catching one’s attention since being plotted in the middle of dinginess and destruction of abandoned buildings, called “Café Comunión” and a skate shop called “La Paz Skate Shop”. I decided to walk towards the skate shop first. As I approached the store I noticed it wasn’t that big yet, it had a very nice aesthetic. When I entered, who I am assume was the owner of the shop, immediately started talking to me. He asked me if had been to the shop before and I answered no without giving any details of the motives of my visit. He proceeded to give me a little background of the shop saying that it had been opened for three years now, told me if I needed any help or had any questions with anything to let him know, then he told me about a party they were hosting the 27th in the community’s basketball court. It took me to surprise the fact that he mentioned such things as if he knew the motive of my visit. I decided to tell him about my blog project and asked him if I could take pictures which seemed to excite him even more about my visit. As I roamed around the store observing and photographing the surroundings I spot a skateboard isolated on the wall with a short paragraph on it.  In summary, it was a tribute to skateboard shops that have closed and a reflection on how skate shops are the epitome of skate culture, and creative epistemologists to the skater community. Once I finished reading that it gave me an incite of the purpose of this shop. The owner clearly opened that shop to preserve as well as introduce to people a culture of creativity and form of liberation for many.

   I walk past the café mentioned earlier and take a quick glance at the space. Contemporary, fresh and young are the first words that come to mind. The place reeks of young indie or more alternative living people. I don’t put much thought to it and proceed to walk along the sidewalk of Ponce de Leon. A little further down, I spot another café, “Café Espresso”. This one is crammed into a small little location, and clearly one of the oldies of the area, being an old-fashioned structure. In contrast to “Comunión”, the only people in this place were late middle-aged and old people. As soon as I realized this, the first thing that came to mind was why was there such a heavy contrast in age presence in each location? Another thing that stood out is how at Espresso the environment was much noisier and more connected within, and by that, I mean that the flow of conversation was very strong since most people were talking with each other, in contrast to “Comunión”, where most people were in their zone.

    The next place that stood out in the community was “Libros AC”, an independent bookstore. As I walked through the door it’s as if I had a huge room of books to myself. The store was empty (except on the café side), there wasn’t even an employee insight. I browsed through the tables reading the selection titles, which were mainly books in Spanish by latinx authors. Most of the books on the tables were related to cultural, identity and historical themes. As I checked out what was on the shelve I spotted a section dedicated to Puerto Rican authors which counted with a huge selection. This warmed my heart a little because I don’t think that Puerto Rican authors get the exposure they deserve. I spent a good amount browsing through this section, and still, I hadn’t spotted one employee come by the area. This surprised me, it was as if the place didn’t care about the possibility of books being taken, it was just a warm invitation for the community to explore the magic of books. During my visit, I saw a young girl around my age walk in the store and a little after she picked up a book of interest and sat down near the window and started reading it; for some reason, it was a refreshing occurrence. I spotted peculiar items non-related to books on the checkout counter, so I decided to pass by and see. It turned out to be items made here in Puerto Rico. It seemed like a good initiative in solidarity with other local business.

   Right next to the bookstore is this modern lot of food trucks with a large variety of eateries. I decided to take a stroll inside and the first thing I see is a large group of middle-aged people eating at a picnic like table. The concept and diversity of options seem marvelous until you look at the prices of each establishment. It did not come to a surprise that the rates at these places were so high since I already have an internalized prejudice of associating these modern and innovative places appearing in lower class communities as exploiters and modern-day colonizers. The places I previously visited had temporarily brushed off that thought away for a moment but, as I experienced this place the questions resurfaced: Who are these spaces really made for? Are they made to benefit only a certain group of people while deteriorating another? Do the creators come with a vision to help the community and it just shifts into the opposite?

     I eventually got picked up by my parents and proceeded to explore more of the area focusing on urban art while riding in the car. As I mentioned earlier in the essay, once you arrive in Santurce, it’s basically unavoidable to not spot a form of urban art. As we moved in the car further past “la Parada 18” and more into the neighborhoods past the Fernandez Juncos Avenue, the art transforms into something soul awakening. I presence a lot of messages related to colonialism and overall the social context of the community and Puerto Rico as a whole. I can’t help to ask myself, are these expressions a form of confrontation to the system? Or to the people around? Maybe it is just a form of claiming permanency on a community that is theirs and always will be theirs no matter what. Maybe it’s the Santurce way of expressing latinx futurism.

  Pictures will be included in a second post along with more thoughts.

[alisonnnnc-blog]

Pub 231 Journals

Week 1: “What does Design means to you?” (How do you see/ use design in daily life?)

Before taking any SIAT course, “design”, this word just tied with aesthetics, and how we can make something aesthetic and appeal to our eyes.

Now, I believe that design is a process of problem-solving for specific purpose. Other than aesthetic, design combines with functionality and meaning to be a sustainable and effective solution serving for its purpose. Having a core purpose (like what the clients want), designer will do research, brainstorm ideas, select ideas, iterates again and again while reminding the match between product and purpose and creates prototype to test the product. Design is like a journey to create something needed in the world.

Design is a kind of communication to me as well. Our choice of font, colour, composition, text and image are crucial to how well and effective we tell the story, information. How it can attract and be understood is something we have to think about when designing with purpose and target audience. It is like telling a story in other medium indirectly. Therefore, design is like a communication to me and it is designer job to form the most effective communication required by clients.

Week 2: Print Production 

Varieties of Paper:

1. Uncoated paper

for business cards, brochures, invitations, books...

have surface textures: wove/smooth, linen, laid...

2. Coated Paper

for magazines, brochures, annual reports, advertisements

(not always glossy/ reflective)

variety of finishes: gloss [shiny finish] , satin [good for img], matte [flat finish, ink just lays on top]

More info: http://designingforprint.com/3-things-to-know-before-you-specify-paper-a-shortcut/

Week 3: Who is a Typographer? (Create a list of typographers, collect an example of work  for each: when the piece was done...)

Typographer [Definition]: a person who specializes in the design, choice, and arrangement of type matter (according to Merriam)

1.  Adrian Frutiger (Swiss): An important san-serifs typefaces designer

Univers (1957) 

Category: Neo-Grotesque

Similar to Helvetica as both are based on Akzidenz Grotesk

Has variety of weights and widths (flexible!!)

Similar Font: Nimbus Sans, Aktiv Grotesk

Font Pairing: Univers+Glypha

Frutiger (1976)

Avenir (1988)

Category: Geometric

Slightly humanist features: e.g. tail on t; o -->not perfect circle

Similar Font: Neuzeit, Sailec

Font Pairing: Avenir + Century Schoolbook

2.   Albert-Jan Pool (Dutch): san-serifs

DIN (original version in 1931 for use in engineering and technical applications such as traffic signs)

Linear (1994)

Imperial (1994)

FF DIN (1995)

FF DIN ARABIC (1995)

FF OCR (1995)

FF DIN ROUND (2010)

Similar Font: Interstate, Nudista

Font Pairing: DIN + Aachen

3.  Giambattista Bodoni (Italian): serifs --- admirer of Baskerville

Bodoni (1798):

Category: Transitional—>Modern

Extreme contrast between thick&thin strokes ==> more suitable for display face than a text face

Similar Font: Didot, Modern 216

Font Pairing: Bodoni+Futura

Week 4: What are cool books about design? 

1. Grid Systems: Principles of Organizing Type by Kimberly Elam (2004)

This book mentions what to pay attention when we are designing the layout: proportion of elements, negative spaces, grouping, etc. that affects the overall visual hierarchy. It also provides many ideas on different composition like Horizontal, Vertical and Diagonal Compositions. 

One cool thing about this book is that there are pages with grids and instructions that we can see through these pages and analyze the layout on the next page. This is quite helpful.

2. The Art of PIXAR Short Films by Amid Amidi (2009)

The book includes characters and storytelling design process of many Pixar short films. From the initial character design: sketches on the facial expressions, motion, modeling, character wireframe in software…to the storyboard of the short film, we can take a peak of the details of these successful animations.

The layout of the book is simple and organized. As it assembled many short animations, it goes in the same flow: 

Initial sketches of the character 

Notes to pay attention to 

Character development (motion and emotion)

Digital visualization (finished work) 

storyboard in sketches

Final digitalized scene

The photos are in full bleed and there is a yellow colour page to indicate the start of another short film. It has a dark blue hardcover with the stamped signature of Pixar — Lamp 

Week 5: (Type)

Pay attention to:

Remove double spaces 

Set italics

Replace hyphens with em or en dashes where appropriate 

Remove widows and orphans

Do not break any proper nouns (names)

Do not break with less than 3 characters(what-ever=ok, whatev-er=no)

Do not stack more than 2 broken lines 

Check that quotation marks(”) and apostrophes(’) are not primes(") 

Adjust loose and tight lines 

Set small caps and text figures where neccessary

Type Crimes: (ones that I mostly will forget)

Orphan & Widow, terrible rag, double spaces, Improper hyphen break

NOT using appropriate ligature or dot-less i 

Negative leading collision

Small caps with lining figures 

Full caps with old style figures

Terrible contrast 

Text only in all caps (sometimes works!)

Overly tight kerning/ tracking

Overly loose kerning/ tracking

Baseline shift not adjusted (character or line of text)

Use of virgules rather than solidus for fractions

Too many typefaces (be careful of context and execution, sometimes in can work)

Rivers

NOT using hanging punctuation (numbers, bullets, indents, quotation marks)

Baseline shift not adjusted (character or line of text)

Week 6: Think about colour. 

(What were some of your findings from playing with this mixing colour papers?)

For option 1: To find colour from achromatic.

For option 2: Have to match value of two different colours? To choose colours that has close values so it will look the same colour.

Week 7: What are interesting magazine about design? 

(Find a design article that intrigued you and write about the most interesting and useful point of the article; take note of when the article was written)

Book Cover Design: (March 25,2019)

https://www.designweek.co.uk/issues/25-31-march-2019/book-covers-that-never-made-it-rejected-designs-revealed-in-new-book/

The article is about a new book called No No No No Yes, which includes 4 versions of book cover that did not make it (4 NOs) and the final used book cover (YES). The article mentions suggestions and reasons why the covers might have won the writers’, publishers’, and other production teams’ heart and why some nice covers got rejected. It is an interesting collection of covers that allows other designers to observe and analyze what clients may be looking for when designing. It is not only about the aesthetic, it is also about the communication of message. Here’s the takeaways:

For printed book:

“But a “direct” and “simple” message and good use of “colour” is often the key to finding a design that works, he adds.”

For electric book:

“so something bold often draws the eye over something restrained”.

Week 8: Publication design principles

Balance

Proportion

Sequence

Unity

Contrast

Things/Terms that I will probably forget:

Week 9: Find a really good and really bad book or magazine cover; analyze why they are good & bad.

Left Cover (Bad):

Unclear Hierarchy: too much colours, the use of many shapes (star, bars), too many bolded/ highlighted/ drop shadowed word: which is hard to know what is more important as everything seems screaming out

No whitespace, everything is compact: for eyes, this might be too much, tired to read before actually start reading

The only success is probably the use of handsome guy to attract potential customers.

Right Cover: (Good)

Image matching heading “Companions in Life”: Correct image choice as I cannot agree more when looking at its eyes. (using empathy to attract readers)

Simple and clear: The hierarchy, theme is clear. It does not list all the potentially interesting feature articles title on cover. It only puts shape and use different font (probably bolded) typeface to create the contrast, which is simple and on point.

* Both covers interestingly used RED as main heading/theme, which is really popping out and readers can know the theme of the mag immediately.

Week 10-11: AUDIENCE, CONCEPTS & SEMIOTICS

1. Signifier: SFU

2. Signified: education, mountain, expensive

3. Icon: (it resembles the signs or the idea) e.g. F ~ facebook?

4. Index: (direct link between the sign and object; a reference; an indicator) e.g. toilet signs (the cartoon)

5. Symbol: (abstract sign; no logical connection between the sign and what it means; culturally learnt) e.g. country flag

6. Paradigm and Syntagm :

Paradigm: a chain or collection of signs which invoke each other because they are culturally, paradigmatically

Black Panther: power, authority

Syntagm: the structural relation that combines signs in code-specific ways.

Color: blue, gold, silver= wealth, high-technology, weapons, royalty

Size of characters: like the order of importance to the narrative; who got most of the power and who is threatening the power

Hierarchy: top-down, from big to small to title

Symmetrical balance: fight to be a stable, steady country?

The pointing “N” in title to sub-heading: metaphor the use of weapons/ metals, fights for the power

[kpopreviews]

BTS - ‘You Never Walk Alone’ Album Review

BTS has come out with a repackaged version of their iconic ‘Wings’ album. I have really enjoyed all of their releases so far, so let’s get started with how I feel about their latest album! **warning: super long and in-depth**

Rating: ★★★★★

Intro: Boy Meets Evil

J-Hope. Wow. He did that. When the instrumentals were going on and they built up the cymbals and the beat stuttered right before Hoseok started singing, I think I died of anticipation and excitement. Then, when he started doing his thing, the inflection of his voice was so enticing and passionate that I died again. Also, the choreography was super intense and intricate (Dead x3). If you haven’t watched the video for this track yet, PLEASE DO.

피 땀 눈물 (Blood Sweat & Tears)

I’m going to be completely honest, I AM ABSOLUTELY IN LOVE WITH THIS SONG. I think this is one of the best if not the best title track release that BTS has ever had. I don’t know why, but there’s something about this song that makes it feel like I’m listening to it for the first time every time. I think it’s because I notice something new every time. It’s so intriguing. When the instrumentals slowly creep up and Jimin starts singing with his alluring voice, I literally had goosebumps all over my body. I also appreciate the Caribbean, moonbahton trap sound that BTS went for. So different and refreshing. I swear, BTS can pull off literally any sound they wanted to. It’s because they put their own twist on every music genre they try out. Although they may be singing a ‘ballad’ or ‘rock’ or ‘trap’ song, they insert their own flavor into the tracks so that they sound distinctly like BTS. I’ll call it the Bangtan Effect. Their voices were amazing, the instrumentals were amazing, the choreography was amazing, the beat was amazing, the music video was amazing... I could go on and on. I think my absolute favorite part of the song is when Rap Monster is rapping with his deep voice and Jungkook starts harmonizing. THAT’S ART RIGHT THERE.

Begin

Jungkook has a stunning, beautiful voice. His voice is airy but hits you right in the heart. I don’t know how he does it, honestly. I love the heavy beat in the beginning of this song. It totally hints at the crazy tempo change that’s to come! I really enjoy listening to this song. And don’t even let me get started on the MEANING behind this beautiful track. Jungkook is given the chance to sing about anything he wants to, and he chooses to sing about his group members aka his brothers aka his best friends aka his role models. I cry.

Lie

Oh Jimin... Your voice... It does things to me. The strings in the beginning did NOT prepare me for this song! I worship the mix between the orchestra and Jimin. I don’t quite know why, but I think that he really fits the dark orchestral vibe of this piece. Maybe it’s his classiness? His seductiveness? His mysterious ways? He just screams ‘royalty’ to me. In addition, I feel like Jimin’s vocals have improved so much. His tone is golden. Pure milk and honey. He flows so well. Also, his ad-libbing absolutely saved me.

Stigma

My poor heart... Where do I even start? V honestly snatched everyone’s weaves with this one. The simple instrumentals complemented so so so well with his voice. And his RANGE. Taehyung... “Why are you like that to me?” His deep, soulful voice in the beginning hit me hard as always, but when those beautiful high notes came out, I was left speechless. I think this song truly embodies Taehyung. Just when you think you know everything there is to know about him, he whips out another talent masterfully.

First Love

DAMN. SUGA. I am in love with the way he carries his voice. He is such a raw, emotional rapper. The thing is, Suga doesn’t simply spit out words as many rappers seem to do. Instead, he mulls them over, contemplating and reflecting on every single one, before imprinting them in your soul. It is an amazing process and I am so glad that I am able to experience it. Also, let’s talk about the meaning behind the words. God, Yoongi. You can tell that music, and being able to create music, means the absolute world to him. He’s experienced loss, hard times, and heartache, but he’s come back stronger and he knows not to take opportunities for granted. I admire this man and the message he’s spreading.

Reflection

Rap Monster, or should I say Vocal Monster? I love when he sings. How does one possibly describe his awe-inspiring, passionate, deep voice? I really appreciate the slow, melancholy rap that Namjoon has been experimenting with these day. The technique was utilized perfectly in this melody, with the stripped down instrumentals and his raw, naked voice. Also, his artistry is next level. Inserting the sounds of Tteukseom at the beginning was genius. Genius and absolutely heartbreaking. I love you, Kim Namjoon.

MAMA

J-Hope is a god. I don’t deserve him. He’s voice is so nice. Songs about parents/grandparents always have a special place in my heart, but this one absolutely KILLED ME. The lyrics are so beautiful. I really liked how the song was upbeat, because although the lyrics could be interpreted in a sad manner, the melody made the lyrics uplifting and inspiring. It made the song more Hoseok-esque. He has a truly beautiful soul. Also, can’t forget the instrumentals! In love with the retro sound that he went for. It suits him so well. It’s incredible. THIS IS J-HOPE’S ERA.

Awake

JIN, WHY WOULD YOU HURT ME LIKE THIS. Seokjin shines SO bright in his solo song, finally showing the world his true range and aptitude. Wow. The first time I listened to this song, I was speechless. His higher range is so well-developed and rich that his voice sounds completely natural up there throughout the whole song. Truly amazing. But the lyrics... Oh my god I cried so hard... Jin saying that he knows he will always be behind the other members, but he’s still going to try hard anyway... Jin putting the rest of BTS before himself... Oh god look at me I’m crying again. I hope he is taking care of himself. I hope he knows that he’s absolutely perfect.

Lost

I really really really enjoy listening to this song. The very first time I heard ‘Lost’, I think I literally fell in love. It was the best but weirdest feeling. I like how it kind of sounds like the vocal members are tossing the lines around. They change up who’s singing pretty often in this piece (after almost every line), so it creates a very interesting blend of tones. So cool. In addition, love the synthetic beeps in the beginning and the snare beats at the end. Nice touches to a wonderful song.

BTS Cypher Pt. 4

Where do I even start? BTS’ rap line came back with a very different kind of cypher this time. Instead of their usual fit-as-much-as-you-possibly-can-in-4-minutes kind of cyphers, rap line took it down a notch. It’s more of a ‘yeah it’s chill cause we can’t hear the haters from all the way up here’ kind of vibe and I am absolutely loving it! It’s still fire as hell though, as expected. The super hard, distinct beats in the beginning had me bumping before the rapping even began! I live for Rapmon’s ‘Sorry Bae.’ It fits the whole song so well. And once again, rap line killed their raps and their haters. BRRR!

Am I Wrong

Country Music x BTS? Yes, please! How can they pull off literally EVERY genre? It’s astounding. Truly. Didn’t I call it the Bangtan Effect earlier? I love the end of J-Hope’s part, when everyone sings “mayday, mayday.” I treasure the sound of all their voices together. I see this is a pattern among Bangtan songs, but once again, THE MEANINGFUL LYRICS. Goddamn. Talk about SOCIALLY-CONSCIOUS ARTISTS.

21세기 소녀 (21st Century Girls)

I live for female empowerment anthems! J-Hope’s “You’re the best to me just the way you are.” Rap Monster’s “Live your life, live your life, come on baby.” Jimin’s “Tell them that you’re strong, tell them you’re enough.” Suga’s “All my ladies put your hands up!” So many iconic lines and such exquisite voice inflections throughout this song. Hype beat + Hype lyrics = HYPE ME.

둘! 셋! (그래도 좋은 날이 더 많기를) (2! 3!)

A really nice change of pace from the two beat-heavy tracks before this one. My favorite part has to be J-Hope’s line, “For becoming the flower in the most beautiful moment in life.” It’s a undoubtedly subtle and clever reference to their past releases. I know it’s supposed to be their fan song, but it is a bit sad if you look at the lyrics. However, it also speaks of promise and trust: “Hoping for more good days.” “If you believe then one two three.” I think the light percussion and the tone of the lyrics go well together to bring out an optimistic, hopeful song. Great bedtime song.

봄날 (Spring Day)

Let me say it right now, if you haven’t listened to this song yet, DO SO IMMEDIATELY. Absolutely in love with everything about this track. Rapmon starts off the song with his low, soothing articulation, which turns over to Jimin with his stable, airy voice, and then to Jungkook to contrast Jimin with his rich tone. Seokjin made me shed tears over his heartbreaking timbre, Yoongi saved me with his passionate inflection, and Hoseok added so much dimension and color to complete the song. However, the show stopper has to be Taehyung. The breakdown, where he sings, “You know it all. You’re my best friend. The morning will come again” hurt me with his soulful voice. Also, the ending (in the music video), where they all sing together was soul-moving. Furthermore, how about the meaning behind this song? Damn, Bangtan. They impress me time and time again. If you are not familiar with the Sewol Ferry Tragedy and how it ties to the ‘Spring Day’ music video, read a great explanation here. Masterful song with an amazing theme. A+.

Not Today

Hype song, hype message, hype choreography. What more can you expect from BTS? This time, they’re reaching out to the underdogs and telling them to keep working hard and having hope. I love it. The beat is distinct, strong, and original, which all add up to Bangtan’s recognizable formula. Additionally, Namjoon’s “Baby, yes I want it” had me feeling some type of way and of course I can’t talk about ‘Not Today’ without mentioning Jungkook’s iconic “Chong jojun BALSA!”

Outro: Wings

One of my favorite songs of this era. I am so glad they came out with a longer version. Damn. Never expected that insane breakdown and that wild verse from J-Hope. I LIVE FOR IT. But I also live for the exchange between Namjoon and Hoseok. “Yo J, Let’s do it.” OK! Meanwhile, BTS went for a ‘clubby’ sound in this track, with the ‘auto-tuned’ voices and the heavy synths, and they pulled it off once again! Bangtan Effect anyone? The best part of it all is that ‘Outro: Wings’ could be a club song, but it still has a deep, important message about believing in oneself and one’s decisions. That makes my heart happy.

A Supplementary Story: You Never Walk Alone

Suga. Singing. Need I say more? I love when Jin & the rest of the vocal line reference Martin Luther King, Jr.’s quote about flying, running, walking, or even crawling towards one’s dreams. Very nice touch. I want to point out the beginning of the song with the softer beat and the echo-y sounds, which eventually transitions to a harder beat as per Bangtan’s style. Classic. Then, Suga sings and the angels sing with him. Then, J-Hope sings and heaven opens its gates. Am I being too dramatic? I just really enjoy listening to rap line singing. Quite possibly my favorite track from BTS. Yeah... that says A LOT about how much I sincerely adore this song.

Overall, I think that BTS’ 'You Never Walk Alone’ album is a splendid masterpiece. The album is a mix of so many different sounds and genres, but they blend genuinely well together. I really don’t know how BTS could top this one, but I think that thought after each of their releases and they always manage to impress me every time. I’m totally in love with their artistry.

Rating: ★★★★★

[doomedandstoned]

Discarded Self Cooks Up a Simmering Stew of Dread in Foreboding Debut LP

~By Billy Goate~

Album Art by Thahir M

Flooding forth with misery and hate comes the first album from Discarded Self... Created during a time of personal isolation, the album ranges from tales of the macabre to introspective trips into self-loathing and personal degradation that dredge up terrible memories of the past to drown in personal regret. There is no hope for the future here.

Thus speaks the introduction to this self-titled debut from DISCARDED SELF, the brainchild of one Jarret Beach. Nestled on the border of Alberta and Saskatchewan in the small city of Lloydminster, Jarret has been jamming on bass with Ashes of Yggdrasil and fronting Destroy My Brains on vocals and guitar since at least 2014. It was the pandemic that drove him inward and inspired him to write this harrowing opus -- an album that erupts with pitch black sentiment, exploring unhappiness, hardship, and distress through several different lenses.

"I Smell Pipes" sets the record in motion with devilish growls over a searing guitar lead. The song becomes increasingly emotional with dissonant harmonies. Whether intentional or not, the drums sound muted, giving it a dank, low-fi feel throughout. The emphasis seems solidly on the riffage, which is all fine by me, though some listeners may wish for a more spacious approach. For full effect, turn those speakers up high!

"Orbitoclast" follows next with a strumming opening and jarring amp feedback. When the vocals join, it's a sludge moshfest ala Iron Monkey and Chained to the Bottom of the Ocean. The guitar is clear, dark, and menacing, and it contrasts with the harsh singing effectively. There are burts of frenetic grinding, with fevered drumming from Joaden Paluck (Destroy My Brains, Wrought) joining Jarret's fire and brimstone riffing. The song ends with clip addressing depression and the danger of suicide, from some old training video in a rather clinical tone.

"Push The Knife" is the longest track of the album, opening with death-soaked drumming (this time with Brett Steward from Ashes of Yggdrasil on the skins) and solemn doom chords that become increasingly animated, finally spilling over in a torrent of blackened tremeloes. The instruments pause long enough for Jarret to proclaim, "I'm barely being held together...fuck this life." The lyrics contemplate the misery of one's existence and the utter despair of realizing: I could really end it all. Having been there, I can identify with practically every word of this song. Also, I'm picking up on a Buzzov*en vibe here, with Jarret's raspy, metallic vocals drawing us into the hardship of the subject quite well. It's as though the pain of depression has gradually worn away at his person, transforming him into this savage beast before us. The sonic mix on this track does a decent job of accommodating the swirling array of death, doom, and black metal styles without sounding too thin and distant.

"On The Unlevel" is another 10-minute monster, with death-obsessed lyrics (this time, it seems, from the perspective of the oppressor). It takes on the mess of politics and policing, though at times I had trouble distinguishing between rage against the system and actually taking revenge on one's enemies. In some sections, I'm reminded of Eyehategod and their propensity for simple, melodic guitar motifs. The drums are especially pronounced here, a collaboration with Daden Paluk (Destroy My Brains). About 7-minutes in, a solitary bass announces the fiery coda, which grinds down on the words "This is what you get, greedy piece of shit." There are some maniacal screams mingling in the backdrop that made me think of a human being who's finally snapped and will no longer be trodden over.

"I'm Weak" is my favorite of the record, beginning as it does with those grim downward steps, followed by irradiated crooning grungy milling. The song is about living with guilt, shame, anxiety, and self-loathing while in isolation. For many of us, nothing felt more like solitary confinement than those unending weeks in lockdown, which forced some to come face to face with what they hated most about themselves. "I'm not well, in my cell, in my tomb, crying for doom" Jarret sings. A headbanger for damned sure.

"Cultist of the Pentagram" wisely picks up the pace with a tonal shift from self-pity towards an imagined deity from some dark dimensions, perhaps Cacus of Roman Mythology ("I am your Caco god"), who was said to be the fire-breathing son of Vulcan -- and a giant at that (eventually taken down by Hercules). Regardless of the cultist's identity, it is a most interesting lyrical theme and I found myself easily pulled into the narrative. Musically, this pure sludgey, grindcore!

"Abused (e)Motionless" turns our attention to the victim of treachery, attempting to see the word through their eyes. An interesting mix of circular, grinding guitar and drums, with slow, doomy progressions, and venomous vocals (which remain omnipresent throughout).

Finally, we arrive at the conclusion of this stormy, angst-filled journey. "Dance Upon The Dead" established a gentle arpeggiated acoustic theme, which is frequently interrupted by a crashing guitar and drum combos, until vocals join in with their usual corrosive fashion. This time, we're dealing with a true doomer, full of mordant chords and deep, emphatic bass notes. Jaden is up once again for drumming duties and executes his role with taste and tact. The song develops with increasing variation and intensity as it goes along. I thought of Grief as I listened, a band that also traffics in fierce, hot-blooded, sludgey doom action.

No doubt, Discarded Self is an enormous work and may be taken in doses on first spin. It will mean even more to the suffering, as I can imagine it being quite a cathartic listen for those who feel trapped, maligned, and in dire straits. Overall, a welcome entry from a prolific and highly motivated artist who does an admirable job collaborating with his drumming compadres. I can only imagine the beast that Discarded Self will become when the Lockdown is lifted for good and public performances become a viable option in Canada and places beyond.

Give ear...

Discarded Self by Discarded Self

An Interview with Discarded Self

By Billy Goate

How would you describe the vocal approach to the songs on this record?

After recording the guitars and bass to a programmed click track, I soon realized the song arrangements had some real potential to be something aggressive and memorable so I went for my first run of lyrics on a song. I wrote the lyrics for the song "I'm Weak" before I even had any drums (which is something I almost never do) and I wanted to record them since I was really feeling the flow and ideas I had for delivery, but it was too late at night and everyone in my house was asleep. So I decided to do a little practice vocal run in a quiet voice. When I do metal vocals in a quiet voice for practicing and stuff, I use kind of an evil Satyricon-Dopethrone black metal kind of voice. It's easier on my throat than my normal hardcore Destroy My Brains full blast screaming, and it helps me lay down my ideas without any type of voice damage.

You collaborated with a number of drummers on this release. How did you work in tandem with them during the Great Lockdown of 2020 and what impact did it have on the final outcome of your tracks?

After I recorded my idea, I sent the track to the drummer of the track Rob, and he said he really dug it. I told him those weren't the real vocals and I would do the real ones in a day or two after I practiced them a bunch and got my delivery down. But when the time came to lay it all down, I had the practice voice stuck in my head and when I tried to lay down my normal vocals, it sounded weird because I was already used to the way the black metal style vocals sounded. So I decided to give what was once my quiet practicing voice a try, and record the full song in that style. It blew me away when I was all done, so I decided to change up my idea and use this vocal style for the whole album. I really like it.

Talk about the artwork. It's a tremendous piece! Really stands out.

After that it was time to go on the hunt for some artwork. Almost as soon as I started looking, an artist I follow, Thahir M, put up a piece called "Monster Hunt" and I immediately knew that was the artwork I needed to represent the project. A very powerful giant demon with dragons flying above almost like a World War II photograph with the fighter planes littering the sky. It took me about a second and a half to rapidly fire him an offer on the art before someone else snatched it. That is where the album art came from. I actually used this art as inspiration while I was recording almost all of the vocals on this album. As I recorded them I would stare at the image of the art and try to imagine I was a demon soldier in that army. I already had the lyrics memorized, so I didn't need to read them as I recorded them.

I'd venture to guess that a lot of us assume one-man bands are just wunderkinds, you know, born with all this multi-instrumental talent. Were there areas you found particularly challenging for you as you sought to bring your vision to life?

I am not a drummer. I suck real bad, and I probably won't ever practice enough to ever record anything so I needed some drummers. I had this idea of using all of the best metal drummers in my city, and it would kind of help bring the scene together a little bit. 3 of the drummers I wanted to get, I was already in bands with, so that was easy, and the last drummer was a guy with some serious skills and creative talent, plus he had his own drum recording setup.

I ended up getting all the guys I wanted on the project which were, Jadan of Destroy My Brains, Rob the drummer of Ashes of Yggdrasil, Brett the lead guitarist of Ashes of Yggdrasil (who also plays drums), and BJ from the band Dahlmers Realm. I couldn't really be more happy about it. So every time I would finish my guitars on a track I would send them off to the guys with a click, and let them stew on ideas. Slowly the ideas came in and we got them all recorded. I was really impressed with what the guys came up with and we worked and tweaked the ideas until they all felt perfect.

It sounds like a very meticulous process!

Almost every time I got the final drums and guitars all together I would stay up for days with almost no sleep writing lyrics furiously, and perfecting my delivery for the songs. The last song Dance Upon the Dead, I actually stayed awake for about 30hrs, writing and recording. I even blew my voice out real bad, but I have a real stupid and bad habit of fighting through it and I finished the song with a pretty buggered up voice. (it just adds to the torment).

What's the benefit to writing metal as an independent musician-composer, compared with being in a band?

The best part of this project was I did it all in my studio at home, and I didn't have to change any of my mixing ideas because other band members did not like it (not that that is a bad thing having extra input or anything). So this album turned out 100% how I wanted it to sound. I went with a less is more approach, and didn't really do a lot of processing on the instruments to get the sounds I ended up with.

You initially were sharing songs as you created them. What kind of response did you get from your tracks early on?

As I completed songs, I would release them on Bandcamp and YouTube, and I set a goal to have one completed every two weeks until the release date I set, which was Jan 15th, I believe. The day I released "Orbitoclast," is where everything changed and I started receiving a ton of positive feedback. "Orbitoclast" was only the second song released, so I was really getting excited to pump this project out.

I was only about two or three weeks away from my release date when I was contacted by Piers Andersen from Cvlt Legion, and he said he is starting a record label called Sarcophagus Recordings and he asked if I wanted to be his first band. I didn't even need to think about it, because I knew he was a part of Cvlt Legion and those guys promote bands at a ridiculous rate, so I went for it. He wasted no time and he had me pull all my material down from Bandcamp and YouTube, so he could properly promote the album. We changed the date to April 30th, and he went to work promoting the album. He is good, he's had me on more sites and pages than I even knew existed, and we've even done a pile of interviews which I enjoy doing.

What did you learn from diving headfirst into such an ambitious first record?

All and all, this project taught me a lot, and I do believe I have further evolved my songwriting and recording techniques for the better, so it was a real good experience, and I've also learned more about the promotional side of music which is really important if you want anyone to hear your stuff. I hope everyone enjoys this album, and you can expect to hear another album from this project in the future as I'm already at six rhythm sections written for another album.

Let's close by getting into the specific breakdown of the album's songs.

1. I Smell Pipes

Discarded Self by Discarded Self

The opening track of the album is actually written about a close friend I used to have when I was younger. It is describing a short chapter of his life, which in turn was the end of his life. He was a good friend but became a fiending drug addict "I Smell Pipes" was actually a quote he used to say when he would arrive at a party, and it signaled for all of the other crackhead/jib users to go into a room a light up rock and crystal all night. What started off as what he called fun recreational drug use, turned into full on lying, cheating, stealing, robbing, rock bottom living on the streets drug use. He passed away with a needle in his arm banging speedballs.

I wrote the song with more fun style riffs, because that was the last thing I remember about him before he disappeared and wound up succumbing to his chemical addictions. He used to be a fun guy. Hard drugs are no joke, there are only two ways it will go for you, if you want to live that kind of life. The lucky ones go to jail and sober up. The unlucky ones die, or live a long time as a worthless drug fiend. If you are having trouble with addictions, talk to someone and seek help. The alternative is more than most likely going to be a coffin. I wrote this song with a heavy heart, and it was really hard to record the lyrics.

2. Orbitoclast

Discarded Self by Discarded Self

The song "Orbitoclast" is a collection of riffs and vocal ideas I actually started this project with. It starts off slow, but gets straight down to it with a thrashy section that has shredding vocals bleeding all over it. For those that aren’t aware, an orbitoclast is the instrument that is hammered into a person’s brain, when they were the poor individual who received a lobotomy in the late '40s early '50s. The song is of course about the horrifying practice of lobotomy, but has an extra hidden meaning. It’s a metaphor for giving your trust to someone who doesn’t have your best interests in mind, and only their own personal interest, with no concern of who they damage along the way.

3. Push The Knife

Discarded Self by Discarded Self

"Push The Knife" is a slow moving look into the mind of someone who is sick with depression and touches on the topics of suicide/blood sacrifice. How it feels like you don’t want to exist in society, and you want to disappear and be forgotten. The song was originally titled "Staple", and is essentially about barely holding your life together like a “bent staple with one arm” as the lyrics suggest. The song takes a horrible turn as the protagonist of the story performs a blood sacrifice of themselves in an attempt to become a demon, and seek revenge upon the whole world who has wronged them throughout their life, joining Satan's and executing revenge upon the world. This song features Ashes Of Yggdrasil’s lead guitarist Brett on the drums, and backup vocals as well.

4. On The Unlevel

Discarded Self by Discarded Self

This song is my hate-fueled message to the government and other forces of oppression and control. I wrote this whole album in 2020, and being the naturally rebellious person that I am, the government control, restrictions, and lockdowns are not anything I ever pictured happening in my life and the damage they have caused to our society is mindblowing. If you feel the same as me, I strongly suggest looking up the lyrics to this song to understand the anger seething from within me when I was writing this. "On The Unlevel" is an attack against oppression, control, racism, division, and lies. Things can’t continue like this, and everyone needs to work together to repair all of the damage, and seriously think about the crucial changes that need to be made in our world if we are ever going to see it the same way it was, or better than it was. This is a true rebellion song of 2020.

5. I’m Weak

Discarded Self by Discarded Self

"I’m Weak" is an ode to all those who are born into this world as a person with crippling disabilities, mental health problems, or sub-par lesser functioning beings, that are unable to accomplish anything in life, and the feelings that are often associated with that, which are often followed by self doubt, self loathing, low personal esteem, drug abuse and suicide. "I’m Weak" is a tribute to a close friend who lived with all of the above named issues, and is no longer a part of this plane of existence. They will remain unnamed. This song embodies what the band name Discarded Self is all about.

6. Cultist Of The Pentagram

Discarded Self by Discarded Self

The track "Cultist Of The Pentagram" is about those who follow the rebel and master Satan, and their efforts to complete Satan’s work, in destroying God and his followers. This song is a complete assault on the world’s organized religions, and their slaughters and atrocities committed against their fellow men, women and children of earth, in the name of their so-called God. The true liar and evil presence that plagues our realm we exist in.

7. Abused (e)Motionless

Discarded Self by Discarded Self

This song was another personal and painful song to write. It is about the many forms of abuse from a loved or trusted person. The damage and trauma caused is generally irreversible, unforgettable, and leads to all sorts of problems throughout the person who was abused. It is a deep look into the person’s mind, and how fucked up they can become from it. If you or someone you know is being abused, be brave and get out of that situation. Reach out, someone will be there to help.

8. Dance Upon The Dead

Discarded Self by Discarded Self

I’ve been watching a lot of serial killer movies for I don’t know, the last 25 years. (laughs) I used those types of films for the inspiration of this song. This song was written from the perspective of a husband or father of a victim of a serial killer. It is clearly a revenge song, and describes the hate and rage that would be felt by the families of the victims. It’s a disgusting dive into that reality, and ends in a way that quenches the thirst of pure revenge.

9. Upside Down (Fistula cover)

Upside Down (Fistula cover) by Discorded Self

I wanted to pay tribute to a band I love and admire, so I recorded a cover of Fistula’s song "Upside Down." Almost every single time I’m hanging with friends I always make them listen to Fistula. Almost everyone I know now knows about them, so that’s really awesome. That also must mean I drink a lot! (laughs) The original song "Upside Down" is a real simple one, so I wanted to really spice it up and added a few things, yet kept it the same, and my drummer Jadan, who is also a big Fistula fan, does a two and half minute drum solo at the end of the track. If you are reading this, and you haven’t heard of Fistula. Do yourself a favour and just turn my Discarded Self album off and check them out. You are going to get simply destroyed!

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[SF] Memories from The Bugger

This is my first time posting here so it's probably not going to be any good but I hope you guys enjoy this.

I first spotted the starcraft at the height of noon, where the larger sun glowed radiantly against the smaller, forming dual shadows across the entire basin. Spires of dull crystal reflected the light minimally, and the more opaque stones left blackish speckles in the maroon sands, almost like a messy piece of art. The sky was entropic as it always was, with crimson, almost violet clouds blanketing most of the planet, excluding an opening that the suns beamed through. Contrasting it all, though, was a heap of twisted metal and scrap strewn archaically in the depression, leaving a round scar over the deepest point of the basin. At first, I skimmed past the wreckage, assuming it to be just unusual crystal formations, but then I realized that such ashy colour and smelted figure can't form normally on this planet, at least not on the surface. Curious, I put away my map and began toward the rubble. Soon enough, I reached the rubble, and was quickly able to deduct that it could not be a natural formation; it was incredibly jagged, almost damaged, and was made of an alien metal. It, in fact, had patterns of bumps in it made of presumably the same metal. Besides that, though, nothing about it could have been less organized. Holes sparatically filled the scrap, twists and turns of sharp, seared metal sprouting from them, and what could not have been anything but wiring hung loosely out of the wounds and were scattered outward from the site. I took my scanner and ran it over the wreckage. It whirred and popped for a moment or two, and then spouted out an image of a spacecraft. Looking back between the real and simulated models, the similarities were undeniable. Although the ship was destroyed, its basic shape seemed to match up with the hologram: a blunt-tipped spear nose preceeding a narrow cockpit, which led to an odd sort of beak belly that stabilized four wings, a pair on each side, and ending with three slit-shaped thrusters. In the virtual model, the starcraft had the title '94-Barrage' etched into its side, which shared the name of a Corvette-class starfighter developed and owned by the Wesser Stellar Federation, but I happened to notice that, of how gored the ship was, the plating where it bore its title was still intact, though a dust had settled on it. I came to read the name, but after wiping away the dust, I instead was greeted by the jarring words: THE BUGGER

"The Bugger is comin' home, baby!" Horos bellowed, grasping a metal orb in one hand and steering the ship with his other. The orb was pulsating rapidly, sending green light in all directions through the cracks between his fingers. Horos laughed and swayed back and forth, victorious in his newest heist. "I've got the Key Interface, and now I can do whatever the hell I want! I could overthrow an entire nation, or get any damn thing I could want; riches, power, maybe even a couple sexy Tlazilian chicks. Hey, I could use some new members for the crew back home, ha!" Horos laughed almost maniacally, bashing the Key into his thigh repeatedly until he dropped it onto the floor and fell onto the steering wheel. "Whoop," he said to himself in his joy, "probably shouldn't break it yet, at least not until I get back to Terra." Horos bent down to grab the orb, but fell out of his seat whenever a sudden crash levered his ship sideways. "Shit," he spat, "It's the Daero!"

As I slowly excavated The Bugger's interior, I saw on its left flank a massive hole, and surrounding the hole the metal contorted inward, as if something had forced the plating open from the outside. Though it could have been space debris or a smaller rock, it would have had to have been moving especially fast to create such an indent, so I deducted that some projectile had likely been launched or even shot into the ship's armour. For what reasons, I did not know. I swiped my hand across the hole's frayed edges, and then continued my search.

Horos quickly pocketed the Key Interface and then returned to the pilot seat, pressing some buttons to make a hologram appear. Multiple intimidating starcraft the shapes of crossbows floated ominously in the void, equipped with many guns and artillery cannons. They appeared distant, like silent giants, but almost seemed to glow with energy. As Horos mumbled something both profane and anxious under his breath, the electronic display distorted, and then a hologram of a humanoid being donning an exquisite robe spawned. It lifted its hand and spoke, "You, Horos Bipros of Terra, are in illegal possession of the Key Interface. As the Daero, it is our duty to protect it, and so we require that you immediately surrender it to us. We have already fired a weak warning shot. Give up now or face our wrath." Horos held up the orb and answered, "I'll give this to you if I can use it first!" "Absolutely not," the being responded. "Well, then you can kiss my ass!" He put the Key Interface back into his pocket and pressed a button, which caused the image of the being to disappear, and then fiddled with the control board until a robotic voice echoed 'All weapons engaged to rear.' Horos put his thumbs onto a pair of red buttons on the steering wheel and mumbled, "Eat shit, Daero!"

Moving my research back to the outside of the ship, I began to examine The Bugger's wings. Each of its four wings actually had a particle cannon equipped onto it, and all were facing the ship's rear. One of which, specifically the gun on the upper wing of the left flank, had been mutilated almost beyond recognition, with its parts hanging out and most of the barrel missing. The other guns were bent and damaged, but still had their basic shape left. Nothing was functional, however, and most of them were likely damaged beyond repair. Had this ship perhaps gotten into a fight? I returned to the inside of The Bugger and my search went on.

The Bugger hummed for a moment before several consecutive blasts erupted from the ship's wings, sending a volley of partical beams backwards and into the Daero cruisers. Each one was met with an invisible force field, making them dissipate before ever reaching their targets. Automatically, the hologram of the being reappeared. "And so you have chosen death..." "Get out of my face!" Horos bellowed, smashing a button so hard that it emitted sparks, which sent away the hologram once more. Before he could fire again, the whole ship shook again and the robotic voice said, 'Wing B1 damaged, Cannon B1 disabled. Engaging rebalancing protocols.' An orange light began to flash as the ship stabilized. "Oh, Goddamnit, I just got that thing repaired. This will cost me so much to fix-" The ship once again was forced sideways, and the voice continued, 'Thruster A disabled, point of penetration in sector D3 detected. Engaging automatic emergency landing protocol.' "Emergency-landing my ass!" Horos screamed, pulling a lever that sent the ship moving vertically. He fired the guns again, which flew backwards and into the Daero's impenetrable shields. One final quake launched The Bugger to the left and into the gravitational pull of the nearby Hequre moon.

I chose to move upward into the cockpit to examine the damage. The windshield was completely shattered, and the control board was not much more than a heap of scrap and rubble. The roof had collapsed at some point, further intensifying the mess of irreparable plate and scrap blanketing the room. The steering wheel protruded out of the pile like a monument, with two red buttons allocated atop each arm. I navigated the mess and began clearing it away, in an effort to find what could be The Bugger's late pilot.

The lights flashed red and orange, and sparks sizzled from the ceiling and walls. "No, no, no, no, no! Shit, no, I can't die this way!" Horos cried, "What will the crew do without me? There's so much stuff I haven't done, Goddamnit!" Horos fumbled with the buttons, but little came of it. The robotic voice came, but it was distorted and unintelligible. Grinding his teeth and gripping the steering wheel, Horos mightily pulled the wheel up, but the ship's momentum was already too great for him to reverse. Heruqe's brick-red ground was fast approaching, and a blaze had began to form around The Bugger, making it into a spiraling, fiery meteor. In a final second of desperation, Horos slammed his fists onto the control board and bellowed, "Work, dammit!" before the ship crashed and exploded in a burst of flame.

After roughly thirty minutes of rummaging in the rubbage, I finally came upon a human hand, brutally seared and bent in many unusual ways. There was almost no flesh remaining. Throwing about some more garbage, I uncovered more of the body until a skeleton could be made out. The skull was crushed and about a foot away from the rest of the body, and everything below the waist was utterly obliterated. However, there was one object in the chaos that was completely undamaged, smooth and pristine. Laying roughly at the corpse's waist was a small, metalic orb that was rapidly flashing with a sharp green light, which hummed and shone brilliantly through the cracks between the metal.

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