#i logged on solely to reblog this

[jetkoweek2024]

ALRIGHT YALL THE VOTES ARE IN!! here are the winning prompts for jetko week 2024!

🎀 RULES:

- any art is welcome as long as it consists of Jetko (fics, art, video/photo edits,etc.)

- no nsfw (no sexual themes, fics included)

- whitewashing art will not be shared

- potentially triggering topics must be tagged accordingly

- IDs are encouraged

- including other ships is okay, as long as it's Jetko centic

- No AI

🎀 FAQ:

-"IDs" are image descriptions! you can add alt text by clicking the three dots at the bottom right of your image before posting

- Jetko week will start on sunday August 25th

-Ao3 COLLECTION (make sure you are logged in to be able to post to the collection)

-i do not own these prompts if you wanna do your own thing (not follow the rules) based on these prompts that is fine but it will not be added to the collection and pls do not use the hashtag/ tag the jetkoweek account

-i am also hosting this over on Twitter if your preferred platform is over there

-there are 2 prompts per day solely for variety, you don't not have to create for BOTH PROMPTS per day! (Unless you would like to) You also don't have to do EVERY SINGLE PROMPT and if your running behind, DONT WORRY! admin will still be sharing jetko week post even after the official week, just don't forget to tag! (I would tag the account just for better chances of me seeing)

Links are embedded in the underlined words!

That should be all! Have fun and as a reminder PLEASE, DONT FORGET TO TAG! you can tag ME or use the hashtag #jetkoweek or #jetkoweek2024 and please reblog others work ❤️ please leave any questions in the inbox 🍰HOPE WE HAVE A HAPPY JETKO WEEK🍰

[katsujiiccfinds]

September 26th this blog will no longer be active.

This page started out as a hobby, to keep track of all cc I liked and downloaded. Lately running this page feels more like a job. While I'm glad it's been a help to people, the downside to a blog like this is that it's non stop. It's everyday. Every holiday, every birthday. When you're sick, when your internet is acting up, when you're having a mental breakdown. Everyday you feel obligated to log on and post.

There are PEOPLE behind these blogs. People with lives, families, friends, hobbies, jobs and bills to pay. While people are out here keeping cc behind a Patreon paywall for months, cc blogs barely even get a thank you.

With my mother being diagnosed with colorectal cancer this month and having to be her sole caretaker, I need to hold onto what ever sanity and happiness I have left and that doesn't include sitting in a hospital, reblogging cc while my mother is getting treatment.

I will leave the page up as it is so whoever found it useful can still access it. There's plenty of other cc blogs active in the community but this is the end for me.

[jerzwriter]

Our fandom is made up of 30 people, half of whom have the other half blocked, so I'm an idiot for even addressing this. But since this continues to be posted publicly, I'm going to set my record straight—MY RECORD. I'm not speaking for anyone else, and no one else can speak for me. None of us are mind readers, no matter how much some seem to believe they are.

Back in April, a creator posted commissions of Bryce Lahela and Keiki Lahela in which the two AAPI characters were whitewashed. I interacted with this post in two ways: I ❤️-ed and commented on it from my personal blog. Also, I was the mod of CFWC at the time and I reblogged it there as part of the Choices Fics/Art of the Week. When I realized what I had done, I posted an apology here without solicitation.

I was angry at myself for my involvement and distressed that my actions caused pain to others. I know whitewashing is wrong. It is racist. I've spoken out about it in the past. Still, I interacted. But I didn't delete my comments to try to hide my involvement as some did. See, when I'm wrong, I say I'm wrong. I apologize and will make amends when it's the appropriate thing to do. So, criticism and corrections are never a problem for me. In fact, they're welcomed because it allows for reflection and improvement.

I'm sharing information not as an excuse but solely for context. See, the world isn't as black and white (no pun intended) as some like to believe it is.

I interacted with that post at around 1:00 AM after being awake for over 18 hours after working a long day, tending to real-life responsibilities, and seeing real-life friends (something I suggest each of you attain.) I was exhausted and should have gone to sleep. Instead, I logged on to reblog and do my "CFWC-work". Something I did every day (for free...) when I was still the CFWC mod.

When I was reblogging, I noticed it was the OP's birthday post (it was mentioned in bold in the header). I interacted from my personal to be kind, and I reblogged to CFWC as I did with all submissions. Did I really "look" at the art? No, I did not. I was exhausted and working on auto-pilot. I'm sure you've all done it - ever end up home and not remember the walk/drive there? I'm sure you have.

Now, I'm sure our fandom mind readers will scream, "WELL, YOU SHOULD HAVE!" and "HOW COULD YOU NOT HAVE!" And have at it. In fact, that's exactly what I said to myself ... days after ... when I happened to see a post calling it out (days after THAT post was originally shared). I went back to look at the OP again, and that was the first time I truly looked at the art, and I was like, "Dude, what the fuck?" <- That was directed at me for not seeing it before because it was so obvious, and I was super upset over it.

I took action and accountability right away. I deleted the reblog from CFWC and took it off the F/AotW List. I removed my comments from the OP and really reflected. I discussed it privately with the OP - you know —like an adult. Then, I issued a public apology, and, most importantly, I learned from it.

It was a reminder to check my white privilege. Did I not see it instantly because I was exhausted and not paying attention, or was it because I am so used to seeing through the lens of privilege that I overlooked it? Truth is, it was a little of both. So now I know to be more cognizant and do better going forward. It was a reminder that no matter how much you think you've learned, there is always more to learn. Always.

It was also a reminder to be more conscious of the content I interact with. I have always tried to interact with as many creations/posts as I could so people felt appreciated. Most people in our fandom are not very supportive. They will interact with one or two of their friends at most. I know how much people put into their little blorbos, and I won't apologize for trying to make people feel appreciated. But no more. Now, I'm interacting much less and only when I have the chance/time to TRULY look everything over. (To those of you who ❤️ something to go back and look at it later, you may want to reconsider that, too.)

I also posted this, and it was especially offensive to some - though for the life of me - I'll never understand why. It's merely saying stop with the vaguing, stop with the hate anons, just talk constructively. It was not directed solely at this event - but every stupid fucking bit of drama I've seen. Everyone is so quick to assume the worst in everyone. Things would be so much better, and so much needless drama could be avoided if people communicated like the grown-ups they profess to be.

Just be a decent human being, and spare me the "it's not my job" bullshit. Because if you're screaming about it publicly, you've already made it your job. You're just not doing the job very well.

I'm not perfect. I have, do, and will make mistakes - just like every single one of you reading this will - but I'm committed to treating people fairly and learning when I make mistakes, and I will offer grace when others make mistakes and show contrition because I know no one's house is clean.

I ran CFWC for years and tried to make it as inclusive as possible and encouraged diversity. A mistake was made, and it was immediately corrected. That does not make a blog racist, and it's narrow-minded and ignorant to suggest it is. But as is often the case in this fandom, those who criticize the most are those who tend to offer the least. Always have a problem with the way things are done, but god damned if they'll do anything to benefit the fandom as a whole.

I hate seeing all the problems and division this has caused. I hate that three people have come to me and told me that they were told to "choose a side." That they want to interact with me publicly but are afraid to for fear of attack. I'm telling you right now, no one will ever hear that from me. I will never tell anyone to block anyone. In fact, I only block people I consider unsafe or who block me - because you don't get to have it both ways. In real life, if a friend tells me I have to choose between them and another friend? I will ALWAYS choose the friend who did not ask me to choose because the one who did already showed me who they are. Make your own choices, but if you feel you can only interact with me privately, I'd rather you block me and move on. I don't need "friends" like that.

It was very hurtful that someone I considered a friend didn't think enough of me to come to me privately and assumed the worst of me without so much as a word. A conversation could have done wonders. But you know what that tells me? The "friendship" wasn't as much of a friendship as I had believed. It happens, and it stung for a bit, but that's done. After all, we never lose true friends.

I totally broke my rule of not explaining myself to those who were committed to misunderstanding me, but I just had enough. Besides, I don't give a damn about them - consider it a gift to my haters. Have at it - tear it all apart - if that's what you live for and have nothing better to do - go for it. I honestly feel sad for you. I wrote this for me - to put my truth out there. And I wrote it for those who are afraid to say these things themselves, and trust, they are out there. It's really, really, really pathetic that a fandom about stupid pixelated people devolves into this.

[whalesforhands]

life never looked so bleak without you (alhaitham x reader)

warnings: reposted from my old acc cause i miss this fic, some parts might not make sense because you need context from the original fic, but can be read as standalone.

11k+ words

if you liked it, maybe i’ll migrate the fic here? haha comment and reblog pls, i don’t bite

log #1

age 3

“Welcome home, honey!” You bounced as you spun around from the makeshift ‘kitchen’. Made from corrugated cardboard and sheets of coloured paper, it was your dream household.

Which was apparently a self-heating kitchen where the oven could fry, bake, boil and cut all your food. The ‘bedroom’ consisted of a blanket draped over two chairs with the throw pillows from the couch thrown in to maximize comfort. Lastly, you had taken to using the plastic chairs and table as your main ‘dining table’. (“Haitham we can’t be married if we don’t eat together at the same table everyday!”)

(Haitham had helped you spell all the signs.)

Walking into your shared ‘home’, Alhaitham pulled out a chair and silently sat down, leaving the stuffed bear that was meant to be his ‘work bag’ by a leg of the small plastic table. Though, his eyes never left the words in the book were trailing over.

“I’m home.” 

You excitedly scurried over to the ‘dining table’, in your hands held a plate of freshly cut zaytun peaches and apples. (With the help of Granny, you acquired real food for your play dinner.)

Making sure the table was clear of leftover colour pencils and paper, you gingerly placed the plate down in front of your distracted ‘husband’ before moving to sit down across from him. 

Alhaitham reaches forth to grab a slice of the fruit, eyes still focused on his book all before he felt a sharp sting on his fingers. His eyes connected with yours as he saw your pointed gaze, “Haitham,” you whine, “How could you try to touch the food without washing your hands?” 

About to make a retort about how he was already very clean, you continued your pouting.

”And what husband keeps getting distracted by his books? His partner will definitely be very lonely!” With a puff of your cheeks you turn away from him, he was so not being a good husband like in the books!

Alhaitham froze. You were right. He promised to be a good play husband so that you would stop giving that book your undivided attention, and focus solely on him. 

Now that he’s grown complacent, with how much you’ve played this game, will you get mad and make him play the family dog? 

No. He can’t have that! (He likes playing the part of your husband the most. You call him ‘honey’ and ‘sweetie’ and it makes him warm inside.)

”I-I’m sorry, dear. I will make it up to you.” 

(“Granny, granny! What kind of names do married people call each other?”

The old woman paused in her steps, holding the lid of the pot of curry in midair. Letting out a chuckle at the glittering eyes facing her. “Hmm, well my children, aren’t you a little young to be married?” Placing the lid down and giving her curry a stir, she pondered over your question a little.

Clutching Alhaitham’s small hand in your own little ones, you raised it towards Granny.

”Nope! We’re already holding hands, so we’re all ready and set to be married, you see!” You let a huge smile grace your adorable face as you gently tugged Alhaitham towards you. 

”Aren’t you both simply adorable! Come here, I’ll teach you how to spell some sweet nicknames for married couples!” Granny definitely had some sweet nicknames in mind for her just as, if not sweeter darlings.)

On the makeshift kitchen, hung a small list of cute pet names for each other. (Some were ‘accidentally’ written twice by a certain silver haired boy so that you would repeat them more often.)

Ah. But there your dearest Haitham goes yet again, speaking words that you both hadn’t learnt on the list.

“Ah? You’ll make… it up to me? Haitham! I don’t like liars!” 

“No! It means I’ll do something nice and extra special for you so that you won’t be mad at me.” He let out a puff of annoyance as he crossed his arms.

”Really?! That sounds so nice! What are you gonna do for me?” You placed your plastic ladle on the kitchen ‘counter’, ensuring that it didn’t fall before hurrying over to his side to receive your ‘extra special’ gift.

Alhaitham thought for a small moment. He could give you a larger portion of his Padisarah Pudding today. Though, that might not work out. You were prone to feeding him even larger bites of your own pudding, citing that whenever Alhaitham leaned in towards your spoon, he looked ‘cute’.

He could read more of your storybooks with you? Though, you usually get a little huffy when he didn’t understand why the prince would trek through such dangerous trails to kiss a princess that’s been asleep for hundred of years.

Oh. That struck a chord in his brain. He knows what to do now.

Alhaitham got on one knee before you, his little legs stumbling a little as he tried to keep his balance. He fixed his hair, and straightened out his clothing as you looked on with a curious, bright gaze.

You were basically bouncing in place. You recognized the position he was getting in! It was the pose many princes were described to be in when meeting the princess! Ahhhh! (Though you would expect your prince to be a little taller. And wielding a powerful sword as he arrives on a white stallion. But Haitham will do for now.)

Gingerly, Alhaitham grabbed hand, tenderly bringing your soft, chubby hand towards his face. Placing his lips on your knuckles, he produced a soft chu!

His chubby cheeks brightened at what he had just done. (But it’s worth it. For you.)

You on the other hand, were speechless. You thought you’d be accepting the kiss with calm graciousness and elegance, but for some reason, your heart was absolutely soaring.

Weird. 

You’ve learned that princesses don’t only take, they also give. And give you will.

You grinned at the kneeling boy, retracting your hand and bending downwards towards his forehead. Clasping his squishy cheeks in your arms, you placed a soft peck on his forehead.

”This is your thank you in return my prince!” You released his face. “You are hereby forgiven and can have another chance of being a good husband!”

Yep. If Alhaitham wasn’t already red before, he definitely was now.

(Granny was watching all this unfold whilst sipping tea. You’d make a wonderful future in-law, if she could say so herself.)

(She hoped that you will continue to stay with that stoic grandchild of hers. The reactions you get out of him were absolutely precious.)

——

log #2

age 16

Granny’s library was a haven. Within the confinements of this small room, was the sanctuary of two friends who basked in presence of each other. A place to escape their responsibilities, a place to be simply and unapologetically be themselves.

Their special spot, that has subconsciously rooted itself into their hearts and never to be forgotten. From the tall shelves holding collections of academic journals, dictionaries and encyclopedias to the small exchanges between the two who have made this area their own.

In a quaint corner of the room, there sat an old, rustic piano. Once belonging to Alhaitham’s father, it was constantly played by to serenade the object of his affection, surrounding her form with a sweet melody he had created just for her ears to hear.

Unfortunately, it has been more than a decade since then. The piano had long lost its shine, covered in dust with its strings deteriorated from years of neglect. Granny did not have the heart to get rid of it, giving  Alhaitham free will to do what he wished with it. Though, he did not care much for it.

Until today.

Watching your door from his window, Alhaitham let a smile unknowingly crawl onto his face as he strode over to the door, hand clasping around the doorknob and turning before pulling it open. 

Your fist froze mid-air, you pouted at the male.

”How did you know I was coming?!”

Now, sat upon the dusty piano stool, you rubbed at your nose, trying to clear away the particles that had caused the red, irritable itch to rise from it.

”We should have cleaned it first.” Alhaitham sat next to you, fingers trailing over the keys of the old piano as he watched you struggle with the presence of the very dust. “I’ll go get you my handker-“

”No! Stay! I’m too excited to wait any longer!”

You had always seen the old piano stashed away in the corner of your favourite room. It definitely intrigued you, leading to you dragging Haitham over to have a better look at it. You needed his approval, it belonged to his family after-all. (And his discerning eye for safety in case you were going to accidentally break something.)

Sat upon the piano’s music stand, was an old, worn journal. Embossed on the leather cover was a small, silver heart. Reminiscent of Alhaitham’s silver hair. You gingerly picked it up, gently flipping through the pages as Alhaitham watched over your shoulder. 

“Haitham…! This is… This is your parents’ sheet music!”

“I see.” Alhaitham, having grown up entirely under his grandmother’s care, did not exactly feel any emotions pertaining to his parents. He simply did not grow any attachment to them, since he was far too young when they passed. So seeing the remnants of their existence did not send him into an emotional spiral, just left him feeling neutral. 

You, on the other hand, mistook his nonchalance for melancholy. You patted his shoulder, grinning.

”I’ll play it for you! Just… Give me a few weeks! And, um, lend me this book? Please?”

How could he ever say no to those eyes you gave him? Granny sure would not mind either.

So here you sat on the piano stool now, having practiced for a mere four days. You had limited knowledge in music, having been pressured to learn some basic piano by your father when you were far younger.

Unfortunately, you never progressed past the basics, your father being unimpressed with your sheer mediocrity despite having you to practice for hours on end. He ended the piano lessons soon after. 

Well, at least you could use your mediocre skill to help make Haitham’s day a little brighter. However, another problem soon arose.

You have only ever played in front of your father and piano teacher. Now, under Haitham’s soft gaze, you felt shy.

“You’re making me nervous, Haitham!” Your eyes were shaky as you faced the piano, dust having long been cleaned up despite your protests that Alhaitham didn’t need to. (His handkerchief was now in your pocket.)

”How did you even play in front of your teacher and father?”

”I don’t know! I just did, okay?”

Alhaitham thought for a moment, before giving you a suggestion. “Close your eyes then.”

”Eh?” 

“If you close your eyes, it’s as if I wasn’t here.” He continues, gaze now focused on the piano. “Since you won’t see me looking at you.”

”I only practiced for a while though…! I don’t think I’m good enough to be-“

”I believe in you.”

You went silent. Alhaitham’s praise and affirmations always left you shy.

“Okay… But could you also turn the other way? I feel like I could still feel your gaze since we’re sitting together.” 

Alhaitham huffed, “Fine. I don’t need my eyes to hear you play anyway.” And so he turned.

“You know, in my books situations like this usually ended up with the two main characters kissing!” It was an offhand joke to help you loosen up and calm down a little more before you played.

Alhaitham simply looked unimpressed. You giggled and cupped his face, before pressing your fingers to his forehead to smooth out his furrowed brows. 

“You’ll get wrinkles, you grumpy old man.”

As you began, Alhaitham had already quietly shifted his body to face you once again. He wouldn’t give up a chance to stare at you with no risk of getting caught, after-all.

He was simply entranced by you. How your hands glided over the keys, how your brows furrowed in concentration, how your hair shone in the light of the setting sun, how beautiful you looked in this moment. He felt something stir within his chest, a soothing comfort paired with a tinge of worry. 

What was this? He doesn’t know.

Though, he wouldn’t mind being frozen in time right now. Alas, the sweet, romantic melody filling the air soon came to its final verse.

“I don’t think I did too bad!” A proud look of satisfaction crossing your features as you faced him, expecting his back to be turned to you.

You had disregarded the existence of close proximity.

An accidental brushing of lips between the two friends sitting by the piano, three seconds of contact and a multitude of mushy emotions springing forth within their longing hearts. Is this what all those characters felt in your books?

Hastily, you both pulled away from each other as your hands came up to clasp themselves over your mouth.  You could feel the heat emanating from your face through your palms, eyes wide and shock filling your eyes as you tried to comprehend the situation. 

What just happened? You stupid, stupid fool! Why did you not watch where you were turning? That romance book comment was meant as a joke! Oh, what cruel archon is forcing you to play it out with your one and only dearest friend?! You shouldn’t have sat so close to him in the first place!

But… You kind of liked it.

But what if he didn’t like that? What if he thinks less of you now? 

Just because of one kiss?

Alhaitham was faring no better.

His eyes had glossed over, mouth slightly agape in genuine shock and surprise as his gaze was stuck on you. Red tipped his ears as he tried desperately to find reason and use his prided logic to regain his senses. He could not.

Overloaded by the intimate feeling of brought about from the kiss you shared. For the first time, Alhaitham had completely blanked out. His fingers gingerly placed themselves on his lips, he could feel the phantom texture of your kiss lingering on them. 

He wanted more. 

You were both no stranger to physical contact, considering your clingy self. Hands grazing each other as you walked next to each other, heads resting on shoulders when either of you get tired, and even that one time Alhaitham had kissed the back of your hand when you were both younger to act as your prince. (Because “Princes are gentlemen who greet princesses like that!”)

Yet, this was so similar, yet so entirely different to the feelings you both felt when it came to your casual, frequent acts of intimacy. 

You both sat in awkward silence for a full minute.

You had imagined your first kiss to be far more romantic, on a starlit night as you gazed into your faceless lover’s eyes, hands holding their face in your hands as they grasped your hips, pulling you closer to their form. They would’ve whispered sweet nothings into your ear, leaving sweet kisses starting from your forehead, down to your nose and both cheeks before their eyes would settle on your lips.

They would whisper another soft “I love you…” into your skin, before they would lean in and finally hav-

You were broken away from your thoughts when Alhaitham’s face was once again in close proximity with yours. Hand gently gripping your wrist and pulling you closer to him, “Can we… Do that again?”

The sheer desperation and raw want in his eyes caused you to fluster, and left you speechless. You could only close your eyes as your lips were once again captured by his, melting into the kiss.

Thus began the beginnings of a your crush on your dearest friend.

——

log #3

age 17

You would describe yourself as a simple person. You were okay with taking things slowly, simply going with the flow.

You were okay with the thought of living a simple life within Sumeru city, in a neat little apartment close to your workplace, where you work a regular 9 to 5, before buying groceries from the nearby market and cooking dinner at home 6 times a week and buying takeout as a treat. 

You were okay with delegating weekends to be the cleaning days. The days specifically for laundry, dishwashing and general housekeeping. 

You were okay with it. It’s not like you hated the thought of it or anything. If nothing else, you’d even say you would love to have that kind of life, especially if there was a romantic partner in the picture.

“You know, I don’t really know what I really even want to do in the future.” You smile, propping yourself up on your elbows as you lifted your eyes, averting from the boring textbook in front of you. 

“Planning for your future already? How thoughtful of you.” The dry response from Alhaitham came quietly, attesting to your environment. In a quiet corner of the Akademiya’s library you both sat, Alhaitham having buried his nose in The Law of Elemental Reactions, by his side sat a stack of just as daunting book titles, your eyes quickly scanning the ones he’s picked out.

‘Academic Infringements of Rights, Case Studies of Anthropological Sites, Cultivation of-‘

Alhaitham was smart, and that is a given fact. Though even you get tuckered out from trying to absorb the entirety of one of those books, let alone the towering stack Alhaitham had picked out.

Noticing your gaze, he responded. “These are to simply pass the time as I wait for you.” 

“W-What? You don’t have to wait for me,” Your voice lowered to a whisper as you caught the glare of a librarian burning into the back of your head. “I don’t think I’ll be done anytime soon…”

You, as a responsible student of the Haravatat Darshan, had completely lost your translation essay.

You dug through your haversack over and over, stress rearing its ugly head as you felt your heart sink to the bottom of your chest. 

“No… No, this can’t be…” You were devastated. Absolutely downcast. You threw your bag to the floor as you rummaged through, anxiety-induced tears quietly gathering at the corner of your eyes.

You spent a lot of time on that paper. Within your lecture, each student had been assigned a new foreign language to translate a script of text into. It was worth at least a third of your grade for this semester.  And you were almost 100% sure you had filed it away safely into the confines of your bag.

You were anxious, starting to hyperventilate. Your breaths quickened as your heartbeat sped up. “Hai-Haitham, hah…” You fell onto your knees. Your head was pounding.

Why, oh why? Oh Greater Lord Rukkhadevata, you will pray everyday to her if it means finding this essay. If it means that you won’t fail, if it means you won’t disappoint yourself, if it means you won’t disappoint Father, if it means you won’t be seen as incompetent by Al-

“I found it.” Handing you your essay, he helped you up to your feet, gently grabbing your forearms and guiding you up as your eyes brightened up, face drooping in exuberant relief as you grabbed onto Alhaitham for support. 

”You did?! Where was it?!” Your relief was, however, soon betrayed as your eyes scanned the text.

This wasn’t your paper.

”Alhaitham… This… It’s due tomorrow, Haitham, you can’t-“

”No. This is yours. Take. It.” Alhaitham took your hands to grip around the essay, his own hands clasping over your own. “I’m more than exemplary when it comes to grades, I’m sure you’ll do well.” 

“Haitham…” Your eyes glazed over with tears as you threw your hands around him. Crying into his chest as you both stood in his bedroom, his arms wrapped tight around you as his hand stroked your back soothingly. 

“Thank you so much. Thank you. I love you. I love you so much Haitham.” Your eyes begin to water even more as you looked into those softened teal-orange ones.

“But you know that I would never accept this.” Your hands reach to cup his face, bringing him down to your eye-level. “Haitham,” You sigh. “You are very smart.”

”That means nothing to me.”

You chuckle. “For such a smart man, I wouldn’t think that you would give up your very own work for me.” Your thumbs smooth over the skin under his eyes. He could only stay silent as he relishes in your touch. Another whispered ‘thank you’ before you place a gratitude-filled peck upon his cheek.

His heart skips a beat.(He hopes you didn’t feel that.)

“I’ll redo it myself, Haitham.”

“Then, do allow me to help.”

(He followed you to the library.)

Thus, an all-nighter was pulled. 

(You treated Haitham to a drink of his choice, to the point of even stealing his wallet away when he attempted to sneakily pay for the both of you.) 

You were always thankful for the good health you were blessed with. Despite not being the most physically fit scholar, you would argue that you were one of the healthiest.

‘Healthy’ in a sense that you barely ever got sick.

Alhaitham on the other hand, was a whole different story. Growing up, your poor Haitham always had had a weak body constitution, easily catching illnesses and catching common colds left right and center despite his sanitary precautions. 

You would be glum on the days where he was declared bedridden and too ill to leave the house by Granny, often sending over pots of homemade congee and herbal broths stemming from Liyuen recipes over in hopes of helping him recover sooner. 

(Granny refused to let you into the house. “What if you caught Haitham’s nasty cold?!”)

“The ‘Get-well-soon’ bouquet was unnecessary. Spending mora on such unneeded expenses is only going to put a bigger hole in your wallet.” Pulling your cheeks as he grumbled on and on about your waste of precious expenses on him, that you could’ve saved up money for something you would prefer, that he should’ve been the one to buy-

What was that last sentence? You didn’t catch that under all the pain.

“Haithammmmm, thawt hurtssss!” You whine as you let him continuously pinch and pull at your face. It didn’t actually hurt of course, you were just trying to lighten up your grumpy friend. “And of cworse you nweed flowers, Haithwam!” Placing your hands over the ones settled on your face, you held them in place. “Plus, I read once that men only receive flowers for the first time when it’s their funeral! Totally blasphemous if you ask me, so don’t worry Haitham! I’ve prevented that from happening!”

Why were you so goddamn cute? With a face as stoic as ever, but ears burning red at the tips, Alhaitham just continued his abuse on your squishy face.

”Nwoooooo, stop! I won’t hwave mwy cheeks anymworeeeee!”

However, in this situation, you have no one to blame other than yourself. Staying late after school within the Akademiya’s library to catch up with lectures you totally didn’t understand with Alhaitham, you had both just finished a progressive study session when the sky soon darkened.

Uh oh. Silly little you forgot your umbrella. Again. Good going, champ.

“You should’ve checked the weather forecast.” Alhaitham pulled out a sleek, dark green umbrella. It was plain, with no designs on it to set it apart from other umbrellas if he ever lost it. 

(Not that he will, but you wholeheartedly believe that even your ever responsible Haitham will mess up one day!) 

It greatly contrasted the pastel one you owned, with its cute designs and bright colours, you could easily identify it even when it has been stolen! 

(Not that that would matter now, considering you had gone and left it at home.)

”So….” You cleared your throat, fixing your green beret and dusting off your clothes as you faced Alhaitham with glittering eyes. “Remember that time you made me cry when we were younger?”

”Guilt-tripping, huh? What exactly rubbed you the wrong way today?” A smirk on his face as he looked down upon you. 

“Oh? Nothing much, just that my prince in shining Akademiya robes has yet to save me from this dreadful rain! Oh, when will a savior wielding a mighty umbrella come to my aid!” Your hand flew to your forehead for dramatic effect, as you slumped against a pillar.

”And I’ll give you a massage.”

”Deal.”

The walk back was eventful, full of chatter and laughter on your end. You would point out the highlights of your day, the fight to stay awake in class, what you had for lunch-

Despite you pointing out all little details you noticed throughout your day, you failed to notice wet shoulder Alhaitham was getting. He leaned the umbrella closer towards you, ensuring that you were dry, protecting you from the rain. He didn’t care that he was getting wet, as long as you were comfortable.

(How didn’t you notice that sooner?)

A sneeze caused Alhaitham to bolt from his lying position on the bed. Dressed down in his shirt and boxers, he was in absolute hell.  His body was cold when out of the duvet, but when he huddled under it, he was feeling far. Too. Hot.

He drank another sip of water. Granny wouldn’t be able to be back until evening. He had to get through this. He could. But why does everything ache? Why does your hand soothe him so much when you place it against his forehead?

”Haitham… I’m so sorry…! I should’ve noticed your robes were getting wet-!” You were feeling so, so guilty. 

“No… It’s not, ack, your fault.” Alhaitham sniffled out. Oh, how he wishes Granny hadn’t called you over to take care of him. He looks far from the capable, stoic version of his usual self.

Archons, this was embarrassing.

”Wait- Do you- do you want me to leave? You are absolutely burning up, please go to sleep, Haitham…!” Your whisper-yelled, removing your hand from his forehead. “I’ll go make you some of my congee, you haven’t eaten today.”

”You… You’re leaving?”

”Hm? To make you some food, Haitham.” You continued to whisper, moving off the seat to begin your trek to the kitchen.

”…don’t go… Stay…” His hand reached out from under the sheets, grasping the air for you.

Oh, archons. Alhaitham was so cute when he was sick.

You pet his hair, holding his hand and soothing him to close his eyes.

”Hehe, it’ll only be for a little while, Haitham.”

”You’ll… Come back?” His usually deep voice was now so soft sounding, so gentle. Like he would break if you even prodded him too much.

”Of course,” You cooed. “I’ll be back real soon.”

Alhaitham awoke to the smell of ginseng. You sat at his bedside, a serving tray placed upon his desk as you held a serving bowl in your hands. 

“Hello, Haitham” You murmured gently. “I’m back, as promised. Can you eat?”

Yes. He could eat. He was absolutely starving, but, he was also feeling weak. Feeling weak means he had lost his inhibitions temporarily, the logic holding back his heart’s desire has been unlocked.

His eyes glanced towards you, donning Granny’s pink apron as you held a bowl out towards him.

”…Feed me.” What in Teyvat was wrong with him? What did he just request?! He was almost a grown man- He can feed himself-!

“Ohhhh! You’re so demanding and needy when you’re sick! Of course, Haitham!”

He was mentally fighting himself the first time the spoon gently prodded at his lips, eyes averting themselves quickly to avoid your sweet gaze as he opened his mouth, taking the first bite. Each spoonful was fed to him with so much love and care. Your cooing after he successfully finished the bowl had him feeling warm and mushy inside. Alhaitham adjusted himself against the pillow, breaths getting less heavy as he felt more energy return to him.

Pressing the back of your palm against his forehead as you leaned in closer, you attempted to gauge his current body temperature.

Archons. You were so incredibly close to him. Please stay right here. Stay close to him. Keep your hand on him. Keep watching him. Only him.

”Oh, it’s definitely went down now! Congrats, Alhaitham, you’re getting better!” You attempted to pull away, to create more distance between you and your crush. 

He pulled you onto the bed with him. Encircling you in his arms, his grip tightened.

”…Stay.” 

Oh my archons. If this was how he usually acted when sick, you never want him to get better.

You sit up, still having his arms wrapped around your waist. You grab his face, slightly pinching the red cheeks. (Was this red from his fever or was he just blushing? He won’t ever let you know.)

”Haitham, I’ll get sick too, you know.”

”Then… You can spend more time with me here…”

Oh. Oh. So cute. Your heart really was gonna burst.

”Are you sleepy, Haitham?”

”Mmm…” His grip around you loosened a little.

”Then go to sleep. I’ll still be here when you wake up.”

”…Promise?”

”Promise!” You interlaced your fingers with his. “I’ll keep holding your hand like this to let you ensure that I’m here.”

(Alhaitham woke up with you huddled into his chest. The lights were off and you had a blanket draped over you.)

(Granny definitely saw the both of you.)

——

log #4

age 21

Operation: Get Alhaitham to forgive you for being a horrible person!

Honestly, the guilt has been eating at you since you’ve been ‘forgiven’ by him. On what basis did you even deserve this? 

None. You were simply a terrible person throughout, running from your issues and using the ones the cared about you most.

At least you were self-aware.

(As if that was enough for someone to forgive you for all the bad you’ve done.)

You sighed, poking at your Aaru mixed rice as you thought about ideas.

Monetary gifts of high value? No, his salary is way higher than yours, and he could definitely afford whatever he wants at any given moment.

Apologetic flowers? Sure, but he’s already been giving you bouquet after bouquet of flowers every week. 

(Strangely, these bouquets have an unusual assortment of flowers within them. Mixed with sweet flowers, cecilias, padisarahs and dandelions and even more. It was definitely a strange assortment.

Upon questioning the strange arrangement, Alhaitham’s ears were bright red as he tried to keep a straight face. 

“I… Ahem. I grew them.” He coughed out, averting his gaze towards the now stupendously intriguing sentence he had been rereading ever since you walked into fray.

”…how did you grow so many all at once…? Sumeru’s climate is suitable for most species of flowers- but regional specific ones like these dandelions are-

He coughs yet again, or it sounded more like he desperately trying to clear his throat?

His brilliant mind could come up with a million different excuses. Oh, he picked them while on a short trip to the forest. A florist was having a clearance sale on their flowers. Kaveh had a few spare flowers leftover from his next project-

He could go on and on, but when it’s you, he blanks out. Plus, being honest with you was one of the key factors to being a good future partner, no matter the shame that came along with it.

“My- Vision. The flowers popped up whenever I thought of you.” His hand latched over his mouth as he felt his face grow hot. “I… Thought it was only appropriate for me to gift them to the one who occupies my mind.”

Now you were the one blushing, a moment of vulnerability of Alhaitham’s had turned into yours. How does he be so smooth with his words?

“Oh… That’s… That’s really cute… Thank you.”)

There was no way you could match up to that level of thoughtfulness behind your own bouquets. 

Should you offer him your bod- No. You slap your own cheeks, startling the silver-haired man sitting before you as you attempted to come back to your senses.

“Are you okay? I would advise you against hitting your own face. I am not comfortable with seeing you hurt.”

His reaction was immediate, hand reaching forth to stroke your red cheeks, his eyebrows furrowed in worry as his gaze of concern pierced directly into your heart. 

Oh, Archons save you.

Was it possible for you to get so red you’ll explode? Possibly. Alhaitham was so handsome that it was hard to even function properly with those eyes staring directly at you.

You immediately darted your eyes away, taking great interest in your food as your eyes flitted towards his own, half-eaten sandwich.

Was that all he was having today? For such a large man, he sure is holding back today. Usually, you’d see him eating much larger portions of protein to supplement the sheer muscle mass he possessed.

Your eyes looked between his food and your own.

An idea. An idea that required a great deal of your nonexistent confidence. 

“Um- Alhaitham…?”

”Hmm?” He replied, eyes still concentrated on your red cheeks as his fingers grazed your soft skin, attempting to soothe the irritated red patches. 

“Would you um-, like some of my food?” The last few words got stuck in your throat, barely audible to the man had he not have been listening so intently to you.

His eyes widened in surprise, heart momentarily skipping a beat. Are you kidding him? Of course, yes! Yes! He would love to eat some of your food, especially if-

“No, my food is perfectly adequate for my dietary needs.” 

Oh. Mission failed. Better luck next time? Your shoulders visibly slumped at your failure of a plan, a frown slowly etching onto your face as you fought to show a smile.

Ah. You should’ve known.

- -

Internally, Alhaitham was tearing at locks of his hair in frustration. He had said that out of habit, out of pure instinct. 

Many a times had some of his colleagues invited him out for a small lunch gathering, despite his slightly frustrated rejections, they managed to slip him into their group outings once or twice. 

And more often than not, female and male colleagues alike would notice how attractive the stoic scribe was. Seeing him from afar was not thing, but sitting up close to him? A whole different standard of beauty was met.

From the tight shirt obscured by his coat hiding the ripples of muscle underneath, his attractive facial structure and his gorgeously intense eyes all paired off with his apathetic nature shrouded him in mystery.

And anyone would have to be the world’s most deceitful, blind or a decent mixture of both to say that was not attractive in the least.

However, upon attempting to grow closer to the scribe, he would shut himself off, giving curt, blunt answers to keep a respectable distance between the individual attempting to curry his favour. Be it man or woman, Alhaitham was unfazed to their less than savory methods of subtle seduction, telling them to knock it off at point blank or physically removing himself from the situation when they grated too much on his thinning patience.

But you. 

You were different. You weren’t a stranger. You weren’t annoying to him in the slightest. Sure, your attempts at trying to flirt with him can only be described as plain awkward, but you certainly had your charm. You were no longer trying to avoid him.

His eyes followed you, internally devastated at himself for denying your offering.

(You could’ve been feeding him right this moment if he hadn’t had that stupid, stupid habit ingrained into him.)

He needs to fix this. Now.

He coughs, marking the page swiftly and tucking the book away as his arms laid on the table. 

“I suppose- A small bite wouldn’t hurt.”

Your body straightened in an instance, happily scooping a hearty serving as you moved to pass the spoon into the scholar’s hand. To your surprise, he grabbed at your arm, maneuvering the utensil to land in his mouth. (With you still holding it?!?)

Wha-What? Did you just- Feed… him?

Alhaitham had soon manually removed your spoon, due to you being, frankly, too stunned to move. That hot blush encompassing your entire face to the tips of your ears had made it obvious to his effects on you.

And Alhaitham was proud of it. No longer did he feel embarrassed having done that, if that flustered you, it was all worth it.

He chewed, swallowing the rather tasty morsel of food in his mouth. 

“Delicious. Though, I suppose you should add more chili flakes next time.”

Getting a taste of your cooking will always be the best treat to him. 

- -

Phase 2! Show something heartfelt to prove your sincerity!

What could possibly be more sincere than making the scribe handmade treats? He seemed to enjoy the bites of your lunch you would give him sometimes, so what harm could possibly come from this?

You stirred and mixed, going by pure instinct and feeling for your little baking escapade. Though, one extra thing you would need to make the perfect pastry would be one simple thing: love.

You had an abundance of it, keeping the ones you adored close to your heart. 

But… Alhaitham- Or, your Haitham was- is different. Your relationship was blurring the lines between close friends and an actual couple, the only barrier being your hesitance, your fear.

You didn’t like getting hurt. And sweet Alhaitham, he had always been patient. Waiting for you, promising you that he would always be right by your side.

You didn’t know if the ‘love’ you felt for him was those akin to the sweet sappy childhood first love, or the sensual satisfaction he could bring you. You knew, knew you were being selfish, making him wait like this. 

But, but, but. Your deepest desire was only to embrace him, allow him to feel all these overflowing feelings from your chest whenever you were around him. Hoping, praying he would help you understand all these unsaid emotions. 

- -

Maybe giving him treats was a mistake. You watched Alhaitham sigh as he lugged a small paper bag of treats onto one of his couches. Grimacing at the sheer amount of assorted treats falling out of the bag.

Hiding the the caneles that you had baked behind you, you peeked your head out from the corner.

”What’s with all the treats?”

Alhaitham held his head, plopping onto his sofa as he slumped into the soft cushions.

“Some of the younger students of the Akademiya gave them to me today.”

Oh. Maybe you shouldn’t have baked today afterall. 

“Are you going to… Y’know- Eat them?”

He pondered your question momentarily. “I suppose it would be rude not to.” He paused, turning to look at you. “Care to join me?”

“Ah- I wouldn’t- I’m kinda… Busy right now?”

Alhaitham scrutinized you, and the way you were nervously shifting around, hands held behind your back.

”What’s wrong?”

”Huh? Uh… Nothing?”

”Something is clearly wrong if you’re being so shifty. Are you holding something?”

”No!” Ah, ah, ah. Lying is bad. “Okay- Fine, yes.”

You timidly scooted over to the couch, presenting your neatly wrapped, cute little pack of baked treats.

“I… Made this for you today…” You shyly stuttered out, before quickly trying to retract your hands.

”But! Since you already have so many- Let me just-“ You sheepishly tried to pull them away, but the ‘feeble’ scholar, with unnaturally fast reflexes, caught your hands, gently tugging the bag away and into his hands.

”I’ll eat them.”

”You don’t have to if you don’t want to-“

He wasn’t listening, already undoing the cute ribbon and taking a rather large bite out of your creation. You sunk down onto the couch beside him, observing him as he chewed and tasted it. 

“So… How is it?”

Alhaitham remained silent, only to continuously eat your baking. He absolutely inhaled your creation, leaving not even a single crumb left, as you looked on, shocked.

”It was wonderful. Thank you.”

- -

Phase 3! Uh… Apologise?

”I’m sooo sorry!” You cried into his shoulder.

Currently, you were sat snugly upon Alhaitham’s lap, his arms cradling your drunken form as you weeped your apologies into his shoulder.

”I-I’m such a bad friend! I hurt you so much!” You sniffled even more, crying as your arms wrapped around the man’s shoulders.

You had both agreed to drink together within the confines of his home. Never did the scribe expect for you to be such a… Lightweight.

One glass in, you words were starting to slur.

Another glass was all it took for you to suddenly climb onto him, straddling him as you stared so sultrily into his eyes before you-

Broke down in tears?

He awkwardly patted at your back. 

You haven’t been so close to him so… willingly before. It felt nice.

”I wanna say sorry… Did I say sorry…? I’m sorry, Haitham!”

”You don’t have to apologise, I’ve already-“ Pause. His eyes snapped towards your clouded ones. “What did you just call me…?”

You smiled, bright, cheerful and full of adoration. “Haitham…?” 

Oh. Oh no. His heart was going to implode on itself. 

“Haithammmmm!! Why are you so red?! You look like- hic! A cute little hic- Harra fruit… hehe!”

You continuously shifted around on his lap, pulling and poking at his face as you giggled and ruffled his hair. “You’re sooooo squishy!” 

“(name). I implore you… Please stop moving around so much…”

”You’re not- Hic! Squishy enough yetttt!” You pinched at his cheeks, leaving a kiss on his forehead as you continued your alcohol-riddled goal of ‘teddyifying’ the scribe, to make him more suitable for cuddles.

Should he hold you down…? If he did, the growing ‘problem’ would become too large to handle.

His hands hesitantly shifted up to hold your hips. This was the lesser of the two evils.

You pouted, hands halting in their movements to press at his face. 

“Oh? Hugs?” You were in gleeful bliss.

”Hugs!” You unceremoniously wrapped your arms around the man, holding him close, holding him tight. Directly pressing his face into your chest due to your positioning. 

You were going to be the death of him.

Operation: Success?

——

log #-

age ???

“Hm…”

You hummed, tracing your fingers over taut skin of your boyfriend’s chest, whilst your lips were kept busy, kissing over the corners of his mouth. Sitting in his lap, you were over the moon at being given the chance to be able to feel him up. 

On the morning of the weekend, you had bounded over to the lax man that was sitting upright in his bed, book in his hands and earpieces, surprisingly, not slotted into his ears. It was a rarity that his roommate, Kaveh would be out of the house. As such, Alhaitham could enjoy a few hours of peace and quiet, listening only to the sounds of your tittering around his home, and calling out his name oh so sweetly as you call him over to the kitchen to sample the lunch you were making as you fed him with your chopsticks or spoon fed him some soup.

(“So is it any good?”

“Anything you make is good, dear. Delicious as always.”

You puffed out your cheeks in annoyance. “Haitham! I won’t ever improve my cooking if all you do is compliment me!”

“It is actually delicious, my de-“

A pout coupled with narrowed eyes. Another scoop poured into the small serving dish held out towards him.

He takes another taste. 

“A little more salt would suffice, darling.”)

Alhaitham is adamant on making you stay over as often as he can to spend more time with you. On nights, he would ensure that he was distracting you enough with tempting offers of new light novels that had just been released, ‘pretending’ to fall asleep with his arms wound tightly around you, ‘startling’ awake when you would even breathe a little too hard, to playing dirty and tiring you to exhaustion after an intense tumbling in bed. 

(He wonders just why you haven’t decided to just move in with him yet.)

You had crawled onto his lap, maybe a bit too excitedly, not noticing that you were brushing over certain, well, more sensitive areas. Comfortably seated upon one of his strong, rather large thigh, your intentions started off rather innocent.

Twirling locks of his hair between your fingers, squishing his face in your hands, leaving kisses trailing from his forehead, to the tip of the nose, to his left cheek, to behind his ear, down to the column of his neck. You were mouthing at his throat, playful and teasing as you kissed and sucked on the exposed skin.

”(name)…” A hand reaches up to hold the back of your head in place, preventing you from going further. “Please,” A sharp intake of air as he felt you leave another kiss. “Stop…” He sounded out in slightly breathy pants, the tips of his ears blushing a bright red as the other hand that had been lazily placed on your hip tightened slightly. 

You pouted. “Sorry, Haitham…” Cooing, you stroked his cheek. “You just looked so cute.” You laid your head against his chest, eyes glittering as you stared into his eyes.

You’ve got him entranced, and you knew it. The blush apparent on his face, all the way to the tip of his ears and grimace of fake annoyance on his face confirmed it. 

Alhaitham sighs, not being able to resist the look in your eye. He loosened his hold on you, slumping back against the pillow, body going slack. All whilst bringing you down with him.

Now longer on his lap, you were laying directly on top of him. You both let yourselves revel in the moment, physically close and hearts full of adoration and love.

Until Alhaitham felt a hand slide under his shirt, prodding at his chiselled abdomen. Ah. You were starting again.

Your hands felt like they were absolutely everywhere. Squeezing his biceps, trailing over his triceps, down to his hips. Your mouth wasn’t doing innocent either, now knowing that his upper body was off limits, you were entertaining yourself using his pectorals. Biting, and leaving marks littered throughout his built chest. 

He felt your hand reach up to squeeze one of his pecs, letting out a slight groan at your touch. You continued to squeeze, a huff of exasperation leaving you. Alhaitham met your eyes, arm now wrapped around your waist, holding you closer to him as he tilted his head in question.

Your brows furrowed. “It’s just,” Hand still on his pec, you squeeze again. “Why do your boobs feel bigger than mine?” 

You weren’t looking at him anymore, but you could definitely feel him rolling his eyes at you. 

“Dearest, I do not have breasts.”

”Honey, if these aren’t your manboobs,” Another squeeze. “I don’t know what they are.” 

He lets out a sigh in defeat. You certainly made the weirdest comments at inappropriate times. You giggle at his baffled self, head now cuddling itself between his pecs. 

“I still love them very much, Haitham.”

”More than you love me?”

”Hmm… Depends on the day then. These,” You nuzzle closer into his chest. “These do not leave their books in piles on the floor and cause me to trip.” 

Alhaitham brings his arm up to your nape, resting itself over it as the other stays over your waist, just above your posterior. He presses a kiss against your forehead.

”I’ve already apologised, dear.”

”Apologies don’t fix the bruise on my knee.”

Ah, whatever will he do with you. One moment you were kissing all over his body, giving him the love he needs from you, the next you were pouting about his habit of leaving books scattered throughout his home. 

You crawl up slightly, wiggling to loosen his hold on you so that you were face to face with him. “How about this, Haitham.” Your hands cup his face. “You make dinner for us and Kaveh tonight,” A kiss to his jaw. “And I’ll forgive you.”

”And you’ll stay the night?” The hopefulness in his voice was so cute.

”Mmhm.” 

You leaned forwards for another kiss, this time pressing your lips directly against his as he reciprocated in kind.

——

final log

2:33 am

In your post-coital bliss, you could hardly move. You were laying on your back, bites littering your skin as you heaved from exhaustion. Your back was sore, your legs felt heavy and the various marks left on you were beginning to sting as the high of pleasure wore off.

You whined out in your hoarse voice, doing your best to sit up against the propped up pillow in search of your husband. 

Just where was he? 

You could swear you felt him supporting your limp body after you had nearly passed out from the ecstasy of pleasure, his hands gripping your hips as his face buried itself into the crook of your neck. His hips were stilled, letting out a groan as he pushed himself against you, trying to get impossibly closer to you as he-

Ugh, you were sore just thinking about it. It wasn’t long before you heard the quiet click of the door, your husband, in his shirtless glory, back decorated with scratches and little marks throughout his neck and chest, while holding a glass of water and a pain relief pill. He knew you needed it.

As you hungrily drank down the glass of water, with Alhaitham supporting your back and holding the glass to your lips for you, he observed your tired form.

“Do you need a shower?”

You shook your head, too fatigued to currently respond with your hoarse voice. He stroked your head, leaving and returning swiftly with a small bowl of warm water and a soft cloth.

He pulled you closer to him, holding your nude form in his lap as he began with your face, and down to your neck, kissing at every mark and bruise he had left during your session. 

His breath hitched in his throat, eyes travelling your bruised body as he gently wiped you down, ridding you of the sweat and fluids as your body leaned against him. He gently pushed you back, giving you a sweet kiss to your forehead, to your nose and finally, to your oh so cute, kissable lips. 

Pressing his mouth against yours, you tried your best to reciprocate this sudden deep kiss of his. You pulled back, desperate for air as a string of saliva connected your once molding mouths.

A moment passes by as you both stare into each other’s eyes. Unable to resist the lovesick look in your eyes, Alhaitham leaned down to nip at the column of your throat.

“Noooooo…! Ngh, Haitham- Ah! I’m too sore…!”

”Please, darling. Just one more.” A kiss against your cheek. “You look too irresistible right now.”

7:04am

”Stayyyyyy- Don’t leave me, Haitham…” 

“Let go. I have to.”

”Noooooooo…! If you love me you’ll stay!”

Alhaitham sighs, “I already skipped my morning workout for you, dear.” He presses a kiss to your forehead as his hands glide across your naked back. So soft, so warm. How could he ever leave the comforts of his bed and embrace of his partner?

Unfortunately, work doesn’t solve itself. (Much to his dismay.) He unlatches himself from you as your hands clawed for the now empty space. He outplayed you.

You pout as you watch your handsome husband search for his work clothes, begrudgingly getting up as well. 

At least you can enjoy the view of your husband getting into the shower.

8:12am

“Haitham, you’re going to stain your books.” 

“‘’M not, I’m careful.” He retorts with a mumble as he, now carefully places down his mug of bitter coffee and shutting the book after marking the page.

(He knew you were right.)

He takes a bite of the jam-covered toast, nodding his head in appreciation and feeling his heart warm as you set down a plate of sliced zaytun peaches, assembled in a heart shape with an egg done over easy in the middle.

”Thank you, dearest.” 

“All for you, honey!” You grin, leaning down and pecking his temple.

His chair scoots ever closer to yours when you settle down with your own plate. 

8:31am

Alhaitham hums in content as he feels you place another kiss on his face. His back was hunched, face leaned down to your level as you peppered kiss after kiss on him. 

From his hair, to his forehead, his eyes, to his nose, both cheeks-

“You missed a spot.” 

“Hmm~? I think you’ve had more than enough now though.” You teased, cupping his face in both your hands as you stared lovingly into equally lovesick teal-orange eyes. 

Alhaitham huffs. Brows furrowing as he narrowed his eyes, his hands finding purchase on your hips and pulling you closer towards him. 

“‘s not enough…” He mumbled, barely above a whisper as his eyes averted away in bashfulness. 

“Haitham, are you pouting?”

”No.” He was now stubbornly trying to turning his head away.

You giggled, before giving in to his demands. Tilting his chin towards you, before peppering his jaw and lips with as many smooches as possible. “Mwah! I’m sorry, mwah, dear! Forgive, mwah, me, okay?”

The red tinted his face, from the tips of his ears to the swell of his cheeks.

 “I will if you kiss me again.”

“You’re gonna be late.”

”I’m never late.”

10:47am

And so, here he was, 1 hour and 47 minutes into work. Stacks upon stacks of paperwork. Another bothersome document to read through. Another signature needed. 

Another boring day to go through, and another 6 hours and 13 minutes before he could finally get off work and go home to you.

What exactly would you be doing now? Did you go back to sleep? He hopes you were getting enough rest. Perhaps you were cleaning the kitchen with the new cleaner he bought? You’ve been complaining about the stains in the kitchen lately. Or, were you within your shared closet, trying out different outfits? You tended to show him both the bad and good ones you’ve pulled together, giggling and asking for his opinion.

Whatever it was you were up to, it just made him miss you a whole lot more.

12:06am

Lunch time. Another period of free time he looks forward to, where he’s able to pull out a sturdy, sleek green lunchbox that was wrapped in a sickly cute cloth to keep it warm.  

He undid the neat little knot at the top, in search of the note you always leave in the lunches you lovingly prepared for him. Alhaitham decides that he definitely won’t make it through the day without your presence.

’Remember to drink more water today!!! I love you Haitham!! More than anything!! And stop frowning, you’ll get wrinkles! I’ll miss you, so come home soon!!’

It was cute. You were cute. The message written was sweet, your name signed at the bottom with various hearts drawn around it. Alhaitham let a smile creep its way onto his face, though he never spoke it, he always replied within his mind.

’I love you too.’

He folded the note and neatly tucked it into his pocket. It was gonna go into his collection. He definitely misses you more now.

5:15pm

”I’m home.” Silence. Alhaitham frowns, setting down his bag by the shoe cabinet as he took off his coat and kicked off his shoes.

The fifteen minutes he took to come home from work was already far too long! How could you not come to see him when all he’s been thinking about all day was you? Alhaitham felt betrayed.

He scoffed, clearing his throat and calling out once again, “I’m home.”

”I’m in the kitchen!” You emerged from the kitchen, not having heard him from the pair of soundproof earpieces lodged in your ear as you placed the pot of curry on the counter.

(A gift from Alhaitham. The earpieces, not the curry.)

“Archons, you won’t die if you aren’t greeted within seconds, Haitham.” You sighed, wrapping your arms around him as you tiptoed to press a chaste kiss to his lips before pulling away.

“I just will if you made me wait that long again.” He pulls you into a searing kiss, arms encircling your waist and pulling you ever closer to him. He reluctantly pulls away, choosing to bury his face into your neck. “I missed you.” 

You hummed, stroking his head. “Welcome home, Haitham.”

7:52pm

You waited near the bathroom, ensuring that you heard the sound of the shower starting, before you took your husband’s used clothing from the hamper.

You silently snuck into the laundry room, clothes worn by him today folded into a neat pile that was held right up against your chest. 

Cautiously checking that the showering was still running and hadn’t yet stopped, you released a breath you didn’t know that you were holding. 

Time for your nightly routine.

You placed the pile down by the laundry counter, holding up his shirt, staring lovingly at it before you closed your eyes and deeply inhaled the scent of your beloved partner.

Don’t get yourself wrong, you had always loved how Alhaitham’s scent, it was clean and refreshing, akin to a forest after a gentle rain shower. It was apparent in places his frequented, the couch, pillows, the clothing in his closet. However, it was something about the potency of the scent after they’ve been worn by him that drew you in, that made you sick with love.

You absolutely loved sniffing his used clothing before you washed them. They smelled divine.

You buried your face into his shirt, cuddling yourself into the article of clothing that had been absorbing his sweat the whole day. Unfortunately for you, you forgot to refill the shampoo today.

”Darling? I think we ran out of- What are you doing?”

You let out a squeak of surprise.

8:34pm

You gently rubbed the towel into his head, trying to wring out the wet droplets from his damp hair. Alhaitham sat upon the edge of your shared bed, eyes scanning the words of his book that was held in his lap as you continued your administrations.

All of a sudden, you stopped. Your arms wrapped around his waist from behind, taking this chance to feel up your muscular husband’s well contoured body. You buried your face into his neck, taking in his smell.

”What? Was the shirt not enough?” A tease. You narrowed your eyes.

”I’m just taking this chance to appreciate my beautiful husband~!”

”Sniffing my sweaty shirts and groping my abdominals are a form of strange appreciation then.” You could just hear the smirk in his voice. Oh, he was never going to let you live your recently discovered secret down.

You weren’t a creature of revenge. You never held grudges against others, nor do you wish suffering upon them. Though, just this once, punishment was in order. Punishment for the sleepless nights he gave you, punishment for making your body sore and punishment for teasing you.

”If you needed my used clothing so bad, I could- OW! Did you just- bite me?”

You had chomped down on the side of his neck, not hard enough to actually hurt, but hard enough to leave the light imprint of your teeth on him. 

“Oops! Sorry Haitham, you were just so cute sitting there that you made my cuteness aggression act up!”

10:30pm

You were barely awake, head atop on your husband’s shoulder as you both lay side by side on the bed, blanket lazily draped over your legs as both of your arms were wrapped around one of his. 

You weren’t exactly reading the book he held in his hands, but you were watching his face. 

Despite his lack of expressions, with eyes glued to his book, lips relaxed in a line and reading glasses atop his nose, he was so cute. You were definitely sure your husband was the most adorable when engrossed in his literature. 

And when he would avert his eyes from the words to meet your own gaze? That smile he would give you as he leaned down to kiss your forehead? Perfect. Your husband was arguably, if not, the best in the world. 

(In your opinion, that is. Not that you would choose to marry anyone else. Ever.)

Alas, it was a shame you weren’t able to stay up forever to watch your him. If you could, you would do away with sleep, choosing to spend the extra time you have to simply bask in the wonderful existence that was Alhaitham. 

“Are you feeling sleepy already, dear?”

You let out a tired hum, your hold around his arm loosening as your head fell onto your pillow.

Alhaitham shut his book, marking the page with the bookmark of a dried qingxin* flower.

(A gift you had made especially for him.)

Switching the lamp off, he laid down next to you, turning on his side and bringing you closer to him. A kiss on your forehead.

”I love you.” A confession of love whispered under the darkness that engulfed the room.

”I love you too.” Requited.

[the-crimson]

Why does it feel like we in the q!bbh fandom are constantly defending q!bbh from people who hate his character for no reason.

I say no reason because a majority of the time people make things up whole sale to get mad about or take the smallest action completely out of context to get mad about it. There are legitimate things about q!bbh that I can see turning people off from his character but those things are almost never part of the discourse.

It’s always: q!bbh doesn’t care about the eggs, q!bbh is the most evil person on the island and should be killed repeatedly, he and Leo have no relationship and she would dislike him, Dapper’s deserves a father that actually cares for him, etc etc etc

It’s honestly exhausting because all of these things are blatantly untrue and I have no idea how anyone could come to these conclusions even if they never watch a second of bbh. Q!bbb is the sole reasons no egg has died of neglect since Trump. Q!bbh is the sole reason many of the eggs have maxed out armor, auto feed set up so they are always at max health, and an XP backpack with hundreds of XP. Q!bbh is constantly going out of his way to help others the moment they ask regardless of his own plans.

There is a REASON q!bbh is the only character on quesadilla island with access to every egg’s safe room in and out of the Ninho. Q!bbh is the only character on the server who has an actual relationship with every single egg that goes beyond acquaintances. Ramon is Dapper’s bff and constantly hangs out with bbh and Dapper. Bbh has done Leo’s tasks more times than I can count and her last words before being kidnapped were “I love you”. Bbh has taken care of Tallulah and Chayanne too many time to count. It was only after talking to bbh about how she feels guilty about feeling like Philza is more her father than Wilbur that Tallulah asked Philza to adopt her. Pomme is literally his daughter. Richas has spent countless nights hanging out with bbh and Dapper (and Pomme) after his parents logged off. Bbh would literally burn the world for Dapper in a heart beat.

When bbh learned no other egg made it off the island in purgatory, he spent the last 15 minutes of his stream muted because he was crying irl. Q!bbh was literally killing himself after the eggs were kidnapped and is basically a walking corpse rn with a gapping hole in his head that’s been there for two months. He’s been having memory problems for over a month - this development with his short term memory loss is a natural progression of his preexisting condition!

PEOPLE PLEASE criticize his character for things he actually does. You don’t have to like every character - q!bbh is an annoying little menace! But don’t make shit up to get mad about I’m begging.

If you don’t like a character, then ignore them. There are several character on the qsmp that I absolutely despise and get annoyed when every they show up on stream but I doubt anyone following me could tell me which characters those are because I never talk about it! Especially not in the main tag! I think through purgatory - when my frustration was at its highest - I mentioned one of these characters once in the tags of a reblog.

Tldr: if you don’t like a character, ignore them. Don’t make shit up about them to get mad at. You’re just making urself look like an idiot and an asshole.

[saintmeghanmarkle]

Harkles curious difference in the way they react to British vs Americans by u/alreadydoneit01

Harkles curious difference in the way they react to British vs Americans I find Markle's recent behavior curious. She is an enigma-in the worst possible way.KCIII walked her down the aisle, she got a million dollar clothing allowance, tiaras,, staff , international tours and she repayed that by calling them racists and waged a war on them, the British and the British media.But in America, she has become a joke . The recent Gwyneth's dinner, Rob Lowe's birthday party-she was NFI and yet she hasn't leaked anything accusing them of being racist. The American tabloids are having a field day with her and openly calling harry henpecked-she won't even respond -yet the two of them are waging a war against the British media and have accused them of racism and everything else.I find it very curious -madame's reaction to British vs American events/media/people. With British every small thing is magnified/embellished/reacted to immediately/sued and racism claims thrown around. But with American events/people-they are being mocked at the Oscars, grammys, Golden Globes, nobody invited them to any prominent events, they were called grifters by Spotify executive who is white. But they never respond, never put out positive PR puff pieces or accusations of racism-except maybe log in a guest-speaker in the comment section and go crazy there.Just wondering why the stark difference between their reaction to American vs british? post link: https://ift.tt/YFSLifU author: alreadydoneit01 submitted: May 05, 2024 at 08:52PM via SaintMeghanMarkle on Reddit disclaimer: all views + opinions expressed by the author of this post, as well as any comments and reblogs, are solely the author's own; they do not necessarily reflect the views of the administrator of this Tumblr blog. For entertainment only.

[idrellegames]

Wayfarer Dev Log 2023.04.03.

Hi friends,

Here is a quick update for April.

✦ The Public Build

The next patch is on its way and should be released sometime this month. As a reminder, Patch 2.6. will require a full restart of the game. This means you cannot use previous save files or pick up where you left off. You must start from the beginning. Failure to do so will result in errors.

✦ The Alpha Build

The next alpha release is on its way! Major edits and proof of Episode 3 Part 1 are finished. I have currently coded around 50k of 350k words of content and I am aiming for a release this April.

If you are interested in subscribing to my Patreon for alpha access when the update comes out, please keep in mind that Episode 3 Part 1 is incomplete and only covers specific continuity paths. There will be more information on the requirements when the update releases.

Last month’s poll is still open. I am currently gauging how much of Wayfarer’s playerbase plays the game on mobile versus a computer. If you would like to participate and help me collect data, please check it out!

If you’ve enjoyed Wayfarer, used my tutorials, or would like to support my work, please consider supporting me on Patreon. Patrons receive access to the alpha build, a private Discord server, exclusive previews, bonus content, side stories, and other benefits.

(Please note that if you are pledging solely for access to the alpha build, the alpha and the public build currently contain the same content.)

Wayfarer is a passion project and creating it is a full-time commitment. Any little bit goes a long way to help me bring it to fruition.

If you aren’t in a position to support financially, reblogs, shares, ratings and comments, and spreading the word about the game are much appreciated and do a lot to help me out! 💕

[megabuild]

tumblr just logged me out but instead of actually logging me out it just decided to show every post as having likes and reblogs turned off and i was scrolling through my dash with my jaw wide open like the sole survivor of a massacre stumbling back to the trenches to tell his sergeant his whole troop has been destroyed

[copias-girl]

Hey. I saw you deleted all the excitement/nonsense from the other day, wanted to check in on you. I realized that while I've been on this hellsite for 12 years and seen and experienced a great deal of my own anon drama, I forget how overwhelming & terrible it feels when it first happens to you.

I failed to notice that, in addition to being very new to this site, you're also only 18 (please note that this is not meant to sound condescending - tone is impossible to convey via text). I was a couple years older than that when I joined here, and I carried just as much excitement and energy into everything I posted and reblogged and quickly gained a reputation for myself. From what I've observed from your blog though, mine was decidedly...less fun & positive, so I got a LOT of anonymous messages telling me what they thought of me. I would spend a lot of time thinking about those anons and the terrible things they said to me, constructive or not, objective or not. It didn't matter how many support messages I got from friends or mutuals, or how much we mocked the anons or made light of the situation - I was angry, embarrassed, felt like nothing I did would fix it, and sometimes didn't want to log onto this site anymore, despite it being the only outlet I had to express myself in this way.

It is normal to focus on the small negative in spite of the overwhelming positive - healthy? No. But normal.

My point is: Please do not let this nonsense deter you from being you. Not everyone is going to like you, and that is totally fine. Not everyone is going to like how you post/reblog on your blog. Speaking solely for myself, I generally keep a more contained dashboard I can scroll through quickly at work, so I don't follow your blog, but I don't translate my personal feelings on how you blog into my personal opinion of you as an individual. Everyone blogs differently on this site, which is what keeps it interesting. I'm also not so chronically online to go out of my way to send you a 5-paragraph essay about consent or being hypersexual in a fandom for a gay Satanic band. Instead I'll send you a 8-paragraph essay trying to comfort you and to tell you not to despair, lmao.

I LOVE your enthusiasm about how you express yourself in your posts & reblogs, and it seems there's a shit ton of blogs around you that feel the same way & express themselves the exact same way. Don't lose that spark! Don't let them rain on your parade! [Insert another cliche phrase here]!

Take time if you need a break, but please understand you did nothing wrong. Everything said to you was someone's opinion they wanted to force on you to control how you behave because they themselves are terrified of the world around them and don't understand they cannot control others. Hopefully one day they'll realize how sheltered and, quite frankly, stupid they are. I did.

My advice: if you ever reopen anons and start getting those messages again, delete them and don't engage. Most of the time they're just looking for attention, to rile you up. Classic bullying tactics.

Or print out their messages and use them as firewood. Or toilet paper. Whatever works.

Lastly, you don't have to acknowledge this or publish this message if you don't want to. Genuinely, I just wanted to reach out and make sure you're okay and to attempt to longwindedly impart some advice from my own experiences over the decade.

You do you, dude. Fuck the haters.

Thank you so so much for this incredibly kind and comforting message ♥︎ I really appreciate it more than you could imagine, it even made me cry reading it. I feel like this message is a good closer for this situation, so I’m also going to use it as an opportunity to give a little PSA about how my blog will be operating from now on.

First of all, just thank you again. I’m honestly astonished because every single thing you mentioned is exactly how I feel. The hurt of it all despite getting so much support, the empty feeling of not wanting to go on tumblr anymore despite it being my only outlet. Tumblr was supposed to be my safe space, my escape, my home, and it really sucks because it honestly doesn’t feel like that anymore.

I think the thing that hurts the most is that literally no one reached out to me as a friend in the dms to tell me that I was bothering them. I’m not a mind reader, so if no one says anything then I assume I’m not bothering them. But I do pride myself on always being approachable, I’m ALWAYS open to people messaging me with their concerns.

It’s different when it’s some faceless anon who comes off as slightly passive aggressive. If someone would have just DMed me, I definitely would have put more thought into it and taken their suggestion. Since I haven’t been on tumblr long, I didn’t even know the difference between reblogging with a comment or reblogging with tags until literally just now during this whole situation.

I just feel like I’ve been serving spaghetti every night for dinner. 9 people say they absolutely LOVE it, but then I come to suddenly find out the 10th person doesn’t. But they never said anything all this time, so how was I supposed to know?

I’ve had two people block me who I thought were my friends. One who, during this situation, even said she’d always be there for me. Basically, she informed me that our mutual friend had been upset about my comments and apparently never said anything before this, so I reached out to that friend and apologized. She apparently got triggered by my apology, and they both blocked me. That hurt. A lot. And if I’m being honest I’ve been fighting so hard not to self harm during this time.

I feel like I’ve been treated like a malicious criminal over this, when in reality everyone should know damn well I’ve never done ANYTHING to deliberately make people feel bad.

And don’t worry, I definitely did not take the comment about my age to be condescending. In fact, I wish more people would have taken it into account. And the fact that I’ve only been on tumblr for 6 months, so I don’t really know much about it.

I have a life outside tumblr. I’m a student, and I’ve had to be a full-time caretaker to sick relatives who have now unfortunately passed away. I’m grieving. My father abandoned me and my mother, so I’ve had to take over doing all the things that he used to do.

I come on tumblr, I scream about everyone’s favourite satanic antipopes, I post some fics, and then I close the app and go about my life. I don’t research the history of tumblr and what’s deemed acceptable by certain groups of people. I’m a human. I’m a real teenage girl, with feelings. I’m able to be hurt, and triggered, and everything else. I know I’ve created a personality for myself on here, and I think people often forget that I’m a real girl.

I wish I could say I’m okay, but right now that spark definitely feels dampened into a sad little ember. Since this has happened, I’ve almost stopped eating entirely, and when I do eat, I immediately throw it right back up. My Mom took me out to eat and I threw up in public. This has honestly had my stomach in knots.

Today was the first day I actually didn’t feel nauseous. So hopefully time will heal this wound. I wouldn’t wish this on ANYONE, but I’m glad to see you got through it and made it out ok. I’m hoping for the same outcome for myself too.

Now for the PSA portion of this message (everyone please read):

Will I stop being unhinged? Hell no. But I will be moving any horny comments into the tags, as suggested by the people who had complaints. The absolute last thing I want to do is alienate people and make people uncomfortable. (I still have questions about reblogging with comments tho, for example, if I say something not horny should I still put that in the tags or is it ok to comment that?)

Secondly, my best friend suggested that I should just start taking my unhinged comments and making them into posts of their own, so I’ll probably do that too. I think I might tag them with some cheesy tag, probably a pun on nsfw (not sugar for work?) so that if you’d like to blacklist that tag, you can, and then your dash will be safe for scrolling at work or wherever. And you can just click ‘view post’ if you want to view it.

So, rest assured, the horny party will never stop! But since I’ll be putting my stuff in the tags, you probably won’t see it circulating as much as reblogged comments, so if you want to see me being unhinged, just come to my page and scroll through!

Also, I’ve gotten so many other supportive messages and I want to thank everyone for sending them in. I won’t be answering them, because I don’t want a lot of stuff about this situation on my blog. And this is going to be the last time I talk about this situation on my blog. But the supportive messages really do mean a lot to me, so thank you all ♥︎

I feel malaise, so I might still be absent for a little while, but I’ll try to get back in the saddle as soon as I can. I haven’t been in the best mindset to write, but I’m really going to try because posting fics and running this account genuinely make me happy.

Thank you for taking the time to read, and I hope to see you all again very soon

Love always,

Sugar <3

[cerastes]

Alright, let’s do the Arknights Personality Quiz and Retrospective.

We’ll start with the Quiz. Closure, off the record, please leak Kal’tsit’s results, thanks.

Oh, that’s really cute, so this is why it asks you to log in! It actually shows you a record of how you actually cleared the Operation/Boss related to the question at hand, very neat. You can tell this is super early because Savage, Skyfire and Zima are in my party. On the other hand, Specter, Platinum, Perfumer, and Nearl have been in my squads since practically forever, and that won’t change. This is about Crownslayer, by the by.

Bob!

Big Bob was the game’s very first event’s boss, and it’s really funny to think how far we’ve gone from “This guy has a chainsaw and hits hard” boss fights to things like Andoain and the Endspeaker. Much like the latter, this game has truly evolved a lot. Specter, Platinum, Perfumer and Nearl still hanging in there, joined by another individual who would become a stalwart presence in my stratagems: Saria.

(The rest of the post will be under a cut)

For Pompeii, I love that one of the options was “Specter with S2 and Ptilopsis with S2″, which is literally how I did it. Let’s go, Shark and Windows XP!

Huh? By March -- Mephisto and Faust -- I was still using Skyfire and Zima? Interesting, I actually thought I’d dropped them far earlier. Siege and Lappland make an appearance here, since I got them around that time! Myrrh is also going to be here for a while, now that I think about it.

Rat King! Immensely fun boss and the boss that got me thinking, wow, ok, they actually have very good ideas and potential for future bosses! The strat was very simple: Angelina S2 and Eyja S3 to kill his shield, Schwarz S3 to end his life. Simple.

LMAO 51% of people chose Warfarin S2 Exia S3 for FrostNova. It’s not quite what I did (no Warf back then), but I instead had Blue Poison also trained on Nova, absolutely ruining her Christmas off the gate. I remember I also used Angelina to slow her down with S2 while the next charge of Exia S3 went online. Specter held the mob line, Saria smack in the center keeping everyone alive with fat S2s.

“Pretty neat to win with strength” LMAO yeah about right for the most unga bunga of the options. Thing is, the other options were the obligatory canon Operators option and one that had a trillion people I’ve never touched in my life. Funnily enough, I didn’t use any of the actual Operators in the option selected (Schwarz, Eunectes, Surtr), but the strategy was still very power-heavy, as you can see from my selection of Operators. Shark, SA and Eyja were putting out real LeBron James numbers. Angie was also very useful to keep him in place! You may have noticed I like Decel Binders a lot, haha.

12%! Really? Mudrock could be brute forced, yeah, but it was so much less work to actually just use the Gramophones, lmao. You actually were expending more effort brute forcing her. Eyja and SilverAsh were there just to clear her up alongside a bunch of fodder that gathered at the same time on the upper left if I recall correctly, otherwise, the Gramophones more or less take Mudrock to very low HP provided you can maintain them and keep a decent Caster on her (Absinthe in my case). Also, the sole time I didn’t use Specter. Shark was taking a break.

Final results and closing thoughts in the reblog!

[mistakesjmakes]

okay this isn’t really a concept but i have been thinking for several days, and i know that i have reblogged many many things that show or imply how much i love the idea of someone viewing touching me or talking to me as somewhat detached and experimental??

like just as a test of how i react to things, something to log and come back to in a relatively dispassionate manner. like “if i say (x) what happens?” or “does she like when i do (x)?”

and that concept will always fascinate me in a way that’s very hot.

but i’m wondering now, is it my signature aquarius detachment at play (this is mostly a joke) or am i just extremely reliant on the concept that if someone is looking at me solely in an experimental fashion, then that means that all of their choices in how they interact with me are of their own accord and because they want to? instead of “i’m only doing this because she likes it,” or something of that nature.

does it absolve me of my ever present and incomprehensible guilt that maybe my physical/emotional needs are too demanding? is that what i like? do i have to be viewed as an object (but not objectified) in order to feel deserving of care? do i have to think that people see me as a puzzle? not as in being very difficult to solve, but simply as in the concept that the puzzle waits to be figured out. it doesn’t react to your impatience or frustration that it’s taking too long, it just doesn’t know how to be anything other than what it is?

and if it’s not any of that, is it just because i have such difficulty receiving impassioned comments, whether positive or negative?? is it just a matter of distance?? so that regardless of whether someone chooses to call me something bad or something good, i can reassure myself that i am neither of those things because they weren’t meant to be sincere, they were meant to garner a specific reaction?

is it so that i can disconnect myself from having to acknowledge that these things are meant for me? is it a guise or distraction or a way to keep myself closed off from both potential praise or potential criticism?

or is all of it a shocking display of pick-me type behavior, where i make everyone work past the point of exhaustion and irritation before i’ll even give an inch, because what if when i give my inch, they decide that they don’t want it anymore?

is it all just a matter of “prove it”? and if it is, where do i get the audacity to make demands?

[isabellehemlock]

I'm 99.9% this is some glitch meant to read 5k or something - solely bc I've been here since 2011 and I can promise I've had more than five reblogs 😅 . . . But this was so effin funny to cackle to when I logged on that I needed to share 😎😘

[kingsroad]

so like, a few days ago, i dropped a link to my video game blog, but i’m also like. i can’t be fucked to log into another account solely to like/reblog video game stuff. should i just make a sideblog?? or should i just post stuff for cyberpunk & baldur’s gate here, too??

[owen-wilson-appreciation-club]

Hello good folks. A (lengthy) update from me:

It does not take a genius to recognize that I have not been super active on this website. Almost no original posts, and mainly reblogs from my girl @wilsonbrothersupdates (love u bestie I log on just to chat with you)

I’ll be transparent. The Owen phase is dwindling. Not sure if the Loki show is gonna revive that, I will be watching for him and for him only (I am done with the MCU if I’m honest. That’s a discussion for another day but I’m here for Owen and Owen alone).

I am not deleting this blog. Like with many things, the phase may return full force, it may not. But I have so many positive memories associated with this community, this blog, and the people within it that I can’t get rid of it. But I think it’s fair for me to acknowledge that I’m distancing away from it.

I feel like I knew the end was coming, but it came without me noticing, and I’ve embraced that. Things happen. I watched my beloved Deadly Seven Owen Mutuals change their themes and their blogs to better represent their current interests. I could never do the same because this blog is solely for Owen, but it definitely reflects on my main account.

I will still forever be a fan of Owen. I’ll forever be a fan of Luke. I’ll forever cherish the crazy shit this blog brought me, from misinformation campaigns to inside jokes about the damn hole (seriously, what even was that? Makes me laugh even now)

If anything, I leave this blog up as an archive. Notoriously I am bad at tagging, but certain things on here can be found under tags like “hall of fame” and “thanks for sending!” as well as the usual thirst.

I’m not fully abandoning it. But I am acknowledging that I have pretty much closed up this chapter of my life. I’ll continue to reblog and post if something truly amazing happens, maybe the crew all comes together for inevitable Lokius (I am delusional. I still believe there is a chance.). I will also return if Hiddlewow reunites post strike. (Please give actors your support! Support SAG-AFTRA!!!)

I am not the same person I was when I started this blog over two years ago (Yes, it’s been that long). I’ve found joy in other aspects of my life, and I realize that there’s more to my own happiness than a 53 year old man with a funky nose.

This will forever be a part of me, for better or for worse, and I’m not forgetting the fun things that happened during the peak of this era. It’s tough for me to write this, to acknowledge that I haven’t been a very good leader of the Owen Wilson Appreciation Club. And while I refuse to give up that title, I will admit it’s been slow on my end.

I hope you all continue to watch Owen’s work, to support him in whatever fashion. I know I certainly will be. And while we won’t be as insane as before, there will always be that little part that keeps me here.

So yeah. If I stop posting, if I stop reblogging, know I’m okay. Know I’m happy and have found peace somewhere else. Know I love you all so much, and appreciate all the joy I’ve gotten over the years. The support has been immense, the interactions hilarious and memorable. I’ve met some incredible people on here (my discord people, you have my heart forever) I’ll leave the ask box open. I don’t expect anything to come in, but it’s there if you ever need to talk. Same with my DM’s.

I may come back full force someday. I hope to see you there. If not, take care. Thanks for everything.

All my love,

Sarah ❤️ (Forever your leader of the Owen Wilson Appreciation Club)

[saintmeghanmarkle]

Reply from NSPCC about Parents Network - Archewell by u/Lauralove2016

Reply from NSPCC about Parents Network - Archewell Some weeks ago I posted SMM that I had cancelled my donations to UK charity NSPCC because of their association to the Griffters this is their replyThank you very much for your call and for sharing your thoughts. I apologise for the length of time it has taken for us to reply to your concerns. We take feedback very seriously as a charity, and your suggestions have been logged and sent on the relevant team to consider and improve the way we work.We wanted to let you know that the NSPCC does not have an ongoing partnership with the Archewell Foundation or Parents’ Network. The campaign created a lot of interest in online safety, and at the NSPCC we know how hard it can be for parents to help children navigate the online world. At the NSPCC we always seek to ensure there is advice available for parents to help them start conversations with young people about online safety and resources to help them understand the benefits and risks associated with their children’s online lives. We therefore created a page full of resources and advice for parents and young people who may be concerned about online safety given the publicity of Archewell’s campaign.Thank you once again for sharing your feedback, and if you need anything further let us know post link: https://ift.tt/2SyL3ka author: Lauralove2016 submitted: September 07, 2024 at 02:11PM via SaintMeghanMarkle on Reddit disclaimer: all views + opinions expressed by the author of this post, as well as any comments and reblogs, are solely the author's own; they do not necessarily reflect the views of the administrator of this Tumblr blog. For entertainment only.

[idrellegames]

Wayfarer Dev Log 2023.03.06

Hi friends!

It’s been a while since my last proper update in January. I am recovered from illness and mostly back to normal; with the days getting longer and actually having sunlight now, it’s easier to stay focused than it was in the winter. A lot of developments have happened in the interim, so I’m hoping this dev log will serve to get you caught up on things I’ve been keeping under wraps until now.

✦ New Blog Reveal

My blog’s desktop theme has been redesigned and updated! Huge thank you to @ethereal-themes for taking this on, I am in love with the new look.

Desktop theme

About

Navigation (with updated tags!)

FAQ

Character Roster (updated with Episode 2 characters + sortable, including by romance type)

These pages cannot be viewed in the tumblr mobile app, but they can be viewed by inputting the link into your mobile browser. Mobile versions of the updated FAQ information and tag list are forthcoming.

Many thanks to @memaidraws for my new blog portrait of Alexia. 💕

Additionally, I am no longer tracking the tag "wayfarer" for community content. The tag has become overrun with bots that makes it very difficult to filter. If you've created something you'd like me to see, please use the "wayfarer if" tag or tag my blog!

✦ The Public Build

A new patch should be coming sometime in March to fix lingering bugs and issues in Episode 2. This patch will require a full restart of the game. Once it releases, you should not use old saves otherwise you may encounter continuity errors and bugs in later episodes.

✦ The Alpha Build

Work on the next alpha update is progressing. I am still writing slower than I usually do, but I am coming up on the end of a major branch. There should be a new alpha release later in March that will cover one half of Episode 3 Part 1.

Even though not all possible routes will be included, the update will add over 300,000 words of new playable content to the game.

✦ Development Changes

Until recently, Wayfarer was planned to be a free game. This is no longer the case. Though I am not ready to announce the full details yet, the game will be eventually be moving to a free demo + paid full game model later in its development cycle.

Act 1 (which includes the Prologue and Episodes 1-3) will remain free to play. Future pricing for non-Patreon early access to later episodes while the game is in development is TBD.

Because this change impacts some behind-the-scenes things, I am need to gauge how much of Wayfarer’s playerbase plays the game on their phone versus a computer.

If you would like to help me out, check out this poll here and let me know what device you regularly play on!

✦ Wayfarer 2023 Pin-Up Calendar

The Wayfarer Calendar is now closed! A huge thank you to our contributing artists and everyone who donated. Altogether, we raised $1094.54 USD. These proceeds were donated today to the Astraea Lesbian Foundation for Justice.

I am so honoured that the calendar was a huge hit. On behalf of our organizers, I would like to thank everyone for their passion and excitement for this project. It’s too soon to announce whether we will do something like this again for next year, but there may be another calendar on the horizon…

If you’ve enjoyed Wayfarer, used my tutorials, or would like to support my work, please consider supporting me on Patreon. Patrons receive access to the alpha build, a private Discord server, exclusive previews, bonus content, side stories, and other benefits.

(Please note that if you are pledging solely for access to the alpha build, the alpha and the public build currently contain the same content.)

Wayfarer is a passion project and creating it is a full-time commitment. Any little bit goes a long way to help me bring it to fruition.

If you aren’t in a position to support financially, reblogs, shares, ratings and comments, and spreading the word about the game are much appreciated and do a lot to help me out! 💕