#i made this like 2 years ago and forgot to post it every christmas since

[quarriawesome]

mods asleep post Christmas Treeku

[dashawfrostart]

This Week In "Time & Again" #11: Still Colouring, And Some Distractions

So... I have a few internet-posting goals for the close future. I know that I keep saying that all the time, but - since I'm an interwebs hermit, and I've been this way for, like, at least 10 years of my life now (and I have zero regrets 😁) - going online to post something takes an enormous mental effort from me. This is probably what happens when ageing, too. Every time I think about that, I just feel like those dogs from the funny videos who are being scolded for doing something their two-legged companions do not appreciate. So, basically and in a nutshell, this is my face when I think about going online to post stuff:

(source: https://makeagif.com/i/UyVZCW) And after all... why would I distract myself from work anyway? 😁 However, I really want more people to get acquainted with Lothar and Jeanny, and Edgar, and Winston, and Beatnik (oops, giant spoilers), and Daniel (oops, even more spoilers), and all of those other weirdos that our violent lovers meet on their strange path towards happiness (hopefully, because, truly, sometimes it's very difficult to say). So this is something that must be done eventually, so I will persevere😁💪 Rolling up my sleeves already!

Anyways, we know that Valentine's Day is coming! And I already have an artwork prepared to be uploaded very soon. Since in December last year I skipped a Christmas and New Years artwork, breaking my own good tradition and ever so slightly ruining a nice progression in the completion of my "2023 Pre-Christmas To-Do List", I figured I really should not delay with this one. And after all, everybody likes a little bit of spicy to set the mood for the upcoming Valentine's Day 😉 (and most of my Valentine's Day artworks are usually nothing short of "spicy" 😁 well, because they have to be that way).

I also made a totally random artwork, because I wanted to practice drawing certain something, a design element I would love to incorporate into my art style - so I came up with an idea to draw a parody of sorts. And it makes me really happy. It felt... rather refreshing. It gave me extra energy and happiness that I could use to continue working on the colouring for the actual chapter. Working so hard on the chapters of "Time & Again", I almost forgot how it feels to draw something random. Or something out of canon. Something simply for the fun of it. Many years ago most of my artworks used to be random and they were dedicated to random, various things and sometimes people. It was good. Now, since "Time & Again" to me is no less that a self-invented job (yeah, pretty much, for better or worse), I almost never do random funny and cute arts anymore, nevermind my greeting cards store had no updates from last year whatsoever... "Time & Again" might sound like a sort of obsession - but that is merely because I really, really, REALLY want to finish it up as soon as I can, because everyone should know what happened to Lothar and Jeanny and how they manage. Even if the confusion about the timelines still persists - but it's twice as fun this way! 😁

A fun observation: there's something in Lothar that I absolutely hate colouring! And the thing is absolutely essential to that particular dirtymouth individual! And the thing is... His glasses. Don't get me wrong! I love his glasses, the way they match his appearance, and that tiny bit of extra sexiness he magically acquires when wearing them. But dear goodness gracious, boy do I ever hate colouring them! 😤 It usually takes me at least 3 layers (lineart inclusive) to colour them, and then I have to arrange all the layers in the proper order. If the rest of the colours - including the skin and the clothing, but excluding special shiny/textured surfaces, if present - take me only one - ONE! - puny layer to make everything as it should be, then the glasses alone - that effing pathetic piece of... accessory! - take at least 2 layers of colouring. 3 with extra shine. Duuuuh. And they appear on every each panel with Lothar, because he wears them all the time. Geez, man! I hope sometime in the future that hot yet disgusting guy gets himself a pair of smart contacts with the built-in voice activated UI overlays. I'm sure he's rich enough to afford such a gimmicky thing. That will free me from a lot of extra work!.. (imagining things? entertaining my designer's hunger? foreshadowing? who knows?!?!;)))

... Which lead me to another one thought about the simplification of the colouring process. You see, with the colouring the way I do it, there's a lot of "automatic" work that is not really creative, one might say. I just need to fill the certain areas of the lineart with a certain colour and remove all the unfilled pixels afterwards... which is just a process of clicking, selecting areas and colours, and filling those areas with the right colours. And it's... kinda tedious. And monotonous. To be 100% fair, it's getting old fairly quickly. Now, shading and adding lighting effects is totally different. But filling the areas with the plain, flat colour prior to applying the shading... is incredibly "mechanical" to me. And my idea was... an AI program to do that. YES, YES, I KNOOOOW YOU'RE EITHER TURNING YOUR BACK ON ME NOW OR DOING THE ROBERT DOWNEY JR. MEME FACE after hearing (reading?) what I just said. I know the whole world just split into 2 groups of people who say either "AI yay!" or "AI nay!". Because, well, you see, human beings really enjoy disagreeing with each other, so there always has to be a reason (says I, cynically). My experience with AI is fairly limited as of now, but as a computer nerd - and a wife of yet another one computer nerd, for the full picture - the new technology mesmerizes me. I was shocked when ChatGPT named me the game I had trouble remembering the title of simply by my extremely vague (and partially wrong!) description - and it did it right off the bat, from the first try. I was utterly mind-blown. We've already heard a lot about AIs ruining the artists' works and yada yada, and we're not gonna touch this topic right now. But since AIs are capable of manipulation with the visual material, then why not teach it to automate the rather tedious processes in creating art while still keeping the essential "human" involvement intact? I would definitely use some nice program to automate the "select and fill, rinse and repeat" part of my work on Chapter 5 and potentially all the future chapters. An algorithm that would recognize the characters by their facial/bodily features and automatically colour them according to the colour scheme I created earlier (so, no random green hair if the character is blond, and no brown eyes if the eye colour must be blue, for example). Or something along the lines of that. Dammit, that would really make the work of the human artists so much faster whenever needed! I vote for this! I will hope from now on that somebody makes me a Krita extension with such a functionality now 😁

Deary me! I can't believe this actually happened! Sorta!.. I think this might be potentially the shortest blog post that I've written IN YEARS!.. Wowza! Apparently I can do that when I'm not trying, haha (but isn't it always this way?..😑 come to think of it, shopping works this way, too: when you're looking for something specific, you can never find it anywhere around!)

Sorry, no gifs today (aside from the funny dog one above). Moreover, when I looked into my screenshots folder, I have discovered that I did not take any this time while I've been working on the colouring like mad. This is sad, perhaps... So let me fix this! Here's a random screenshot that is very difficult to unsee, and it makes me super, super happy - especially considering what's actually happening in the story while Lothar is so... high? (would that be the right word in this situation? 🤔 man, sharing screenshots of random panels from the comic out of context is fairly odd)

... And now, I disappear into my little and comfy tree hollow, ruffling my feathers, so that I could work more on Chapter 5. Gotta make it stellar, after all! So I need more time in my tree hollow! Silky smooth! (ok, I start to get carried away associatively, so I better stop. Bye! See you soon in the next update!.. ah daaaaw, the next blog post! 👋)

[revengeisourlullaby]

Thousand Eyes

Warnings: Pro Hero Au, 18+, smut, unprotected sex, dom/sub-themes, overstimulation, begging, choking, oral (receiving), jealousy, hair pulling, claiming, slight breeding kink, fluffy ending

Shoto Todoroki x Female! Reader

Word Count: 7.4K

a/n: Happy Holidays everyone! I hope whoever comes across this is having a good end of the year and finding the positives in all the craziness. I have a few more fics in the works and will start pumping them out since I’m on break. Maybe I’ll start incorporating hcs, fluff only stuff, drabbles, etc and not just the long fics. Much love <3

You were sitting on the couch, scrolling through your phone waiting for Todoroki to arrive home from work. You had just finished fixing up dinner and he typically came home around the same time so the two of you could eat together. While switching from Tiktok to Twitter, you heard the front door click signaling to you that Todoroki had come home. Bringing yourself up from the couch you walked over to the door to greet him with a hug. You barely left any room for him to remove himself from his shoes before you wrapped your arms around his neck and nuzzled into him. Todoroki looked down at you, smiling. 

“Hi, baby.”

Dropping his work bag off to the side he returned your hug, squeezing you a little tighter than normal. Pulling away from him, you moved back a bit to finally let him all the way through the door. 

“How was work today?”

Grabbing his duffel bag up from off the floor and bringing it into the bedroom you heard him respond from the other room. 

“Not too bad. Actually, it was pretty calm today, mostly patrol over anything.”

“Well, that’s nice to finally have a break of sorts.”

Walking back into the main room, you saw him towards the bathroom. 

“Yeah, it was a nice change of things. Actually, something else came up. I want to talk to you about it but I’m gonna shower first if that’s alright?”

Nodding lightly in response, you waved him off. Walking back into the kitchen you turn the burner back on the stove to give the dinner that you made some extra heat.

“We can talk about it over dinner.”

Hearing him hum an okay and disappear into the bathroom, you hopped back on your phone and scrolled through Twitter again. Mindlessly scrolling, you saw a post reminding you about your childhood. It was a meme regarding the Grinch and you went deep in thought about your life in the earlier years. Thinking about how much you loved the Christmas season, and how that film somehow brought your family together no matter the occasion. The memories sticking with you dearly. You were so lost in thought that you hadn’t seen your phone shut off or Todoroki slipping out from the bathroom. He was standing in front of you and you still hadn’t noticed him standing there. 

He walked up to you, placing his arm on your arm and his other hand finding his way under your chin lifting it slightly so you could look at him. 

“Hey, my little ember. You there?”

He softly chuckled which brought you back to reality. Staring up into his eyes, you realized once again how beautiful he was. His hair was halfway dried, a few beads of water snaking their way down his strands. His brows were slightly furrowed in an attempt to silently understand what was going on in your head. Even though you guys had been together for a few years now, seeing him in front of you like this after you had zoned out and made the blood rush to your face. Making you heat up instantly.

“Y-yeah I’m fine. I was just thinking about old memories and got lost in them. You uh, you ready to eat?”

“Yeah sure.”

Grabbing two dishes from the cabinets you plated the food for both you and Todoroki. Bringing them to the table you turned back around to grab two glasses you turned around and asked him what he wanted to drink. Bringing the two cups to the table you finally sat down and the two of you began to eat. Swallowing you looked up at Todoroki.

“So what was it you wanted to talk about?”

“Oh! Yeah, I completely forgot.”

Taking another bite of food Todoroki began to speak through his mouth full of food. 

“So when I was leaving work today one of my interns informed me of this gala being thrown for all the heroes. I called Midoriya to see if he knew anything about it and it seems that it’s more festive than formal. Like a Christmas get-together. So, this is a long-winded answer of me asking if you’d want to join me?”

Your mind was racing about what you were gonna wear to this gala because the last thing you wanted was for you to feel underdressed. 

“Y/N?”

“Yeah! No, I'd love to go. I was just thinking about what I was gonna wear.” 

Chuckling softly, you rubbed the back of your neck, kinda embarrassed at yourself for being so vacant of reply for your boyfriend. 

“You’re always thinking about how you look...and I don’t understand why because you know you’re gonna be the hottest one in the room.”

“Sho! You’re gonna make my head big.”

“What?! It’s true. You’re too hard on yourself”

Shoveling another bite of food in your mouth you brushed him off

“Yeah, yeah I know but still I wanna look good. I can’t be next to you and then not put out. Can you imagine how that’d look?” 

Looking at him incredulously you were waiting for him to respond and when he did you wanted to slam your face in your hands.

“It’d probably look fine because you look fine regardless.”

“Shotoough-”

Exasperating at his response it caused him to let out a small laugh. Following suit with the small laughing fit, you shook your head and regained yourself. 

“So you said it’s kinda festive like we’re supposed to dress up?”

“I suppose. I’m pretty sure either way is fine.” he responded flatly standing up to go help himself to a second serving of food. 

“When is it by the way?” 

“Tomorrow.” he said, turning around to come to sit back at the table.

“Tomorrow?!” choking on your food a bit from the shock of this event being tomorrow. 

“Yeah..”

“Well, now I really have to worry about what I’m going to wear. Shit.”

Todoroki stayed silent noticing that you were deep in thought trying so fervently to figure out what you were going to wear to this gala. You didn’t want to disappoint but at the same time, you didn’t want to make it seem like a big deal for Todoroki’s sake. 

Suddenly, your eyes widened and you realized that you had the perfect thing to wear. 

“Todoroki! I got it!”

“Huh? Got what?”

“What I’ll wear for tomorrow!” 

Standing up from the table you walked into the bedroom speaking to him while walking away.

“Do you remember when I was making that Santa outfit but never wore it out because I was afraid it was too obnoxious? The one I based off that rich lady in the Grinch.”

Sliding the hangers to the side you were sifting through all your clothes trying to find this dress that you made a couple of years ago. Sliding over to the side of your clothes that you had your winter wear organized in you saw bright red fanned out on the floor of the closet. Bending down to pick up the fabric from the floor, your backside brushed up against something. Standing up with the dress in your hands you turned around to see Todoroki standing behind you. Holding the dress out to your side, Todoroki wrapped his arms around your waist. Your bright smile plastered across your face 

“Look! I found it. I’m gonna have to go get a petticoat tomorrow so it lays right but I think it’ll work well! And I can find you something too while I’m out.”

“I don’t think that’ll be necessary, baby. Wouldn’t wanna steal the show from my girl now would I?”

Dropping your arm that was holding the dress you wrapped your other around Todoroki’s neck. Threading your fingers at the base of his hair, massaging lightly into his scalp. 

“No, I guess not.” 

Smiling up at him, Todoroki lowered his head to meet your lips. Engulfing your lips in a tender kiss that warmed up your entire body. Every time he kissed you it felt like it was the first and you never wanted them to end. His lips were always somehow so soft and inviting. Pulling away and looking back up at him an idea popped in your head.

“Maybe we can just add a lil something to your tux then.”

With a small smile now on his face, he nodded his head in agreement. With a yawn beginning to dawn on him, your body followed suit against your will. A sudden wave of tiredness falling over you both. Stepping away from you, Todoroki began heading toward the bathroom. 

“Why don’t we get ready for bed? I have to get up a little early to finish up the paperwork from today’s shift.”

Nodding slightly you followed him into the bathroom beginning your nightly routine. You finished before Todoroki and walked back into the bedroom. You picked your costume up from the pool it was in on the floor and hung it back up in the closet. The cheeky smile that spread across your face was something that didn’t slide past Todoroki when he came back into the bedroom. 

“What’s got you smiling like that?” a breathy chuckled punctuated his question.

“Nothing really. Just thinking about how we’re gonna look tomorrow. I’m excited.”

Climbing into bed, you snuggled up into Todoroki as well as the sheets. 

“Well don’t stay too excited, you gotta get your rest.”

Placing a kiss atop your head you told each other good night and Todoroki shut off the lights. 

Waking up the next morning, you’d had gotten up a little later than you expected. You usually were able to catch him before he left. Throwing the sheets off yourself you stretched and tried to get yourself out of bed. Rubbing the sleep out of your eyes you opened up your phone and when you saw the time the leftover sleep left your body and you started getting ready in a hurry. It was almost noon and you still had to go out and grab a boutonnière for Todoroki and a petticoat for your dress. You got ready in record time and left your home to get said desired items. You wanted to be back in time to do your makeup and get properly dressed up and not be rushed for the event. 

By the time you got back home, it was around 2:30pm. Who knew finding a mistletoe boutonnière would’ve been such a feat. Finally settling into the couch you let out a sigh a relief and your stomach let you know for the third time within the hour you should eat something. With a groan, you waddled into the kitchen and fixed yourself something quick to eat. Todoroki would be home around five so you had enough time to screw around a bit. After you finished up you looked at the clock and decided to start to get ready for the evening. 

With your speaker blasting Christmas music you were clad only in black lingerie and adding the final touches to your makeup. Stepping back away from the mirror to get a full look at your face you smirked at yourself and went into the bedroom to get your dress and everything on. Pulling up your red fishnets and petticoat you walked over to the closet to grab the dress. 

Slipping it on you fastened the belt and then bent over to grab your red heeled boots from the bottom of the closet. As you got the zipper up on the boots you heard the front door open, signaling that Todoroki just got in. You glanced over at the clock and noticed it was about 5:30pm.

‘Just in time’ you had thought to yourself. Todoroki called out for you and with a quick 

“In here!”, you let him know that you were in the bedroom. You stood up and straightened yourself out while looking into the mirror embedded on the closet door. 

“Wow.”

Turning your head to look at him you posed and smiled at him. 

“Ya like?” 

“Yes, my little ember. You look amazing.” 

You walked a little closer to him wrapping your arms around his neck. You felt heat travel up into your face as his gaze seemed to pierce through you. 

“I know what that look means, and you need to get ready, or otherwise we’ll be late.” 

Planting a small kiss on his cheek you walked away and heard a small groan come from him which elicited a chuckle from you. While you were waiting for Todoroki to finish getting ready, you were stuck in front of the mirror in the main room deciding whether or not you wanted to add the Santa hat or not. You decided to keep it on hand and just put it on when you arrived at the gala. You didn’t want an indent in your hair to be too noticeable and if worse came to worse you would just have to fluff out your hair in the bathroom. 

You heard the clearing of Todoroki’s throat and you looked behind you. He always looked so good in anything he was in. His black tuxedo fitted nicely against his body and his hair was slicked back, a few pieces falling loosely in the front. 

“Well, look at you.” A cheeky smile following your words. 

“You like?” Todoroki wore a smug smile referencing back to how you greeted him earlier. Catching on you continued the charade. 

“Yes, very much. But, I have something to make it even better.” 

Walking into the kitchen where you dumped your findings from your outing earlier, you grabbed the mistletoe boutonnière. Going back over to Todoroki you began to pin the boutonnière onto the lapel of his tux.

“I told you I was going to find you something to make it a little festive. So now, whenever I come next to you a part of me will be under you. So I’ll just have to kiss you.”

Finishing pinning it onto his lapel, you looked up at him, his heterochromatic eyes seeming to sparkle with a new endearment to bestow upon you. 

“Very funny, now let’s get going.” He pressed a kiss on top of your head and you stretched back to grab your hat and clutch that you left on the counter and walked out the door. 

The drive to the venue was quiet but that was nothing out of the ordinary. What was though was Todoroki’s hand on your thigh occasionally squeezing at the plushness of them. You were smirking to yourself trying your best to keep your composure, but he gave your leg one particularly hard squeeze and you pressed your legs together out of habit. 

“You alright?” 

You could hear the smirk in his voice but you refused to give into him this early, you hadn’t even pulled up yet. Clearing your throat you fixed yourself in your seat

“Yeah, great actually baby.” Moving your hand onto his thigh closest to you you asked him, 

“You excited for it?”

“Yeah, I think it’ll be fun for the both of-” You had grazed your hand across his lap, running over his clothed sex to reach his other thigh and give it a squeeze causing his breath to hitch. 

“Guess I should’ve known that was coming sooner or later.” An airy chuckled left him but you knew that you had him right where you wanted him. Pulling up to the venue, he parked the car. 

Stepping out you grabbed your clutch and hat, staring into the tinted side window to place your hat where you wanted it. While checking yourself in your makeshift mirror, Todoroki came up behind you wrapping his arms around your waist. Nestling his chin into your neck

“You look so beautiful, baby.” 

“I know, now let’s go in so everyone can see.” You knew where he was attempting to go with his compliments but at least wanted to experience a little bit of the gala before your makeup would be indubitably ruined.  The both of you walked up to the hall this event was being held in and you could hear Christmas music blasting. The doors of the hall were open so you knew exactly where to go. 

Stepping in the hall looked like a winter wonderland. There was soft blue lighting throughout, snowflake and icicle decorations hanging from the ceiling. Centerpieces on the tables were filled with snowbrushed branches and accents of green. And of course in looking at the scenery in front of you, you failed to noticed the mistletoe hanging above you and Todoroki’s heads until Midoriya came up to greet you guys. 

“Hey! Todoroki, Y/N, how are you guys.”

“We’re doing great, it’s really good to see you Izuku!” You moved to go and hug him but he backed away slightly. 

“I can’t step under there with you Y/N, Todoroki is right there.” A nervous laugh left him but the overtone of joy covered it up. 

“What do you mean?” Looking up you noticed the mistletoe and then glanced at Todoroki

“Oh, that’s what he means.” Todoroki verbalizing your thought. With a quick kiss to Todoroki you moved back over to Midoriya giving him a hug. 

“You’re still such a goofball, I love it.” As you two were giggling you looked over at Todoroki who signaled to you that he was being motioned over with some work friends. Giving him a nod you hung around Midoriya for the moment.

“You wanna grab a drink? They have this killer spiked eggnog, you can’t even taste the alcohol.”

Raising your eyebrow you lightly elbowed Midoriya

“Sounds like my kinda thing.”

While walking up to the bar, you noticed Bakugou hunched over scouring the floor of the hall. He hadn’t noticed you yet so you picked up your steps and called out to him.

“Hey! Kaachan!” 

An audible groan left his mouth, cutting through the music that was blasting through the speakers. You knew that nickname pinched a nerve in him and seeing his reaction killed you every time. You came up closer to him and enveloped him in tight hug.

“Oh c’mon don’t be like that. You know I can’t resist screwing with you.”

“Yeah yeah, now get off me.”

“Not until you give me a proper hug you dumbass”

Reciprocating the hug with one arm you stepped back and he finally got a full look at your outfit. Lifting his glass to his face he motioned to you

“Nice outfit.”

“Right! I finally had a place to put it to use to.”

Midoriya had chimed into the conversation now, “That’s the dress from the live action Grinch right?”

“Yeah! God I love that movie.”

Sitting up on the stool next to Bakugou, you asked for some of that eggnog Midoriya was raving about. You spun around so you could face both Midoriya and Bakugou while at the same time trying to spot Todoroki in the crowd of people. You spotted him chatting with Momo and a few other people that you assumed he’d done work with. 

You hadn’t noticed that Midoriya had walked over to Todoroki, you were too busy wrapped up in your thoughts at the moment. You sucked your teeth and a small sudden wave of jealousy was flowing over you. While in your head you turned your head to see your drink waiting on the bar counter and you took a big gulp of it. 

“God damn Y/N, did you even taste it.” Bakugou teased you.

“Yeah I tasted it. Midoriya was right saying you couldn’t even taste the alcohol. Shit is like juice.” You laughed trying your best to cover up your jealousy with alcoholic tendencies and low rate jokes. 

Bakugou noticed the quick change in your behavior and tried to follow to where your eyes were boring holes into. Once he saw Todoroki and Momo sitting a little too close for comfort he understood the current state of upset you were in. 

“Stop staring at it, it’s just gonna make you more upset. It’s probably nothing anyway.”

“Staring at what-”

“Todoroki and Momo. You couldn’t hide your emotions to save your life Y/N”

“Guess you’re right about that.”

Sighing you swiveled the chair back around ordering another glass in a piss poor attempt to keep your nerves at ease and not think about the scene in front of you. You trusted Todoroki and never even thought of him having ill intentions with you. 

You just felt a little competition with Momo considering they went to school together, she was stunning and he once had a crush on her that you found out not too long ago. It was all too much for you to process in the moment and Bakugou was attempting to figure out what to do to pull you out of your funk. Putting his glass on the counter he put his his arm on your shoulder.

“Look, you’re too pretty and look too nice to be feeling like this.”

Standing up he held his hand out to you and looked up toward the speakers,

“And by the sound of things, seems like it’s the perfect time to share a dance. So, care to dance with me?”

A small smile spreading across your face, you chugged the rest of your glass of eggnog and took his hand.

“I’m never gonna forget that.”

“Oh shut up.” Lightly laughing you trailed behind Bakugou leading you to the floor. Sia’s Snowman was coming through the speakers and you seemed to forget what it was you were upset about while swaying with Bakugou. He seemed to catch onto this and looked down to you only to be met with your eyes looking up at him with that of a doe. 

“Thank you.”

“Oh don’t start with that I just didn’t want to sit with someone mopey.” 

You nudged him while still swaying to the music

“Oh whatever, I’m still thanking you.” He looked down at you again 

“Try not to think about it too much. He’s still somehow ridiculously oblivious to things and doesn’t think about stuff like that too deeply. He doesn’t mean nothing by it. Wanna go get another drink and go over there?”

“Sure why not.”

Getting your drinks you walked over to the group of people you had become acquainted with through Todoroki. Old school friends of his that you seemed to flawlessly get along with. Walking in front of Bakugou you heard him mumbling about something. 

“What’d ya say?”

“Why are you walking in front of me?”

“Seriously?! That’s why you’re making all that noise.” You knew he screwing with you and you just waved your hand and walked over to the group. When you got there you noticed Todoroki wasn’t there anymore. Momo was the first to greet you out the group.

“Hi Y/N! How are you, it’s been so long.” She was also in a Santa dress but less dramatic than yours. She had a cute little santa hat headband to top it all off.

“I’m doing great! And you look gorgeous as always. This is a little off topic but do you know where Shoto went? I needed to ask him something.”

“I think he went to the bathroom. If you go to the back of the hall and turn left that’s where they are.”

“Okay cool, thank you. I’ll be right back!” You announcned to the rest of the group and they all nodded you off, acknowledging your absence. Walking to the bathrooms you went to turn into the hallway but instead turned into boyfriend. 

“Oh there you are, I just coming to look for you.”

His demeanor seemed unreasonably sharp and you couldn’t place whether he was mad at you or something else. 

“Hey, what’s wrong?” 

“Nothing why don’t you go hang up on Bakugou again.” 

Your face contorted in surprise and complete shock about how he was addressing the situation. He tried to walk away but you grabbed his wrist.

“Hold on, you’re not gonna jab at me like that then walk away. If it bothered you that much why didn’t you just come up and switch with him. I didn’t come up to you because it seemed like you were enjoying yourself chatting with Momo and everyone and I didn’t want to interrupt. That’s all.” 

“It’s a little hard to pay attention to a conversation when I’m focused on you dancing with another man, let alone it being someone I’m close to.” 

With that he walked away from you and back to the group from before. You watched him in disbelief, in absolute shock about what just happened. You took a deep breath and huffed walking back to group as well, instead when you arrived you didn’t sit on the couch next to Todoroki but rather leaned on the back of the couch standing over everyone. 

Looking up you saw Bakugou coming back with two drinks in his hands. He looked down at the couch and noticed Midoriya slumped out on the couch, unsure if he was sleeping or trying to focus himself on not making a mess everywhere. 

“Got this for him, but I think this is that last thing he needs so you can have it.” You smiled a thank you and continued chatting with everyone. You looked over at Todoroki who’s face was blank but his eyes held a fury that was unmistakable to you. You grabbed your phone out of your clutch to send him a text but he didn’t respond, let alone look at his phone. You sighed and excused yourself to the bathroom this time actually having to go. When you left you ran into Todoroki waiting in the hallway. 

“Hey…”

“Save it, we’ll talk about it later.” 

Mumbling an okay you walked back to the group slightly stumbling, all the eggnogs finally catching up with you. You took a detour to the bar to get a water to try and balance everything out. While sitting up at the bar Bakugou came up beside you. 

“What’s up with him?”

“He’s upset with me for dancing with you. Guess he does think pretty deeply about these things.” You rolled your eyes not having the energy to put more thought into your partners antics, knowing that if you did you’d completely ruin the rest of your mood. You looked up towards the group and saw Todoroki giving what looked like his goodbyes to everyone. You swiveled back to face Bakugou 

“This blows, but at least I looked cute while it happened.” Shaking your head you took another sip of your water. 

“That you did.”

You looked at him through your lashes, unamused knowing that he was part of the reason you were in the predicament that you were in. Chuckling to yourself you spoke one more time

“This will make for a funny memory in retrospect but right now I’m so over it.” 

The two of you were lightly laughing with each other when Todoroki made his way up to you too. 

“I’ll be taking her now.”

Whipping your head to him you couldn’t believe the way he was speaking.

“I’m sorry who the fuck is her?” The alcohol making you a little more loose lipped than normal as well as bringing your bubbling frustrations of the evening to the forefront. Bakugou snorted at the sight in front of him and got up from the bar

“See ya around Y/N. Call me.”

“See ya man.” 

Todoroki was glaring at the two of you and the ending interaction before he turned on his heel with your hand in his. Completely numb to the situation and with the help from alcohol you were almost a blank slate, not really thinking about anything that was going on. 

“Can you stop walking so fast, please, baby?” You were met with silence until you got to his car. Mumbling to yourself you didn’t think he’d hear you but to your surprise he did.

“If you’re gonna say something, say it so I can hear it.”

“Oh will you quit the act already. I was dancing with him I didn’t fuck him Shoto.”

“Sure looked like you wanted to with the way you were looking at him-

“-And I could say the same about you and Momo but you ain’t see me throw a fuckin hissy fit about it Sho! All up on her n shit, give me a break. Let’s just go home.”

You grabbed the door handle and let yourself in the passengers side sitting in silence when Todoroki got in and started the car. The tension in the car couldn’t be sliced with the sharpest blade, it was so thick it was almost suffocating. You took your hat off and fluffed your hair out in an attempt to hide that you were trying to get a look at him. His hands were gripping the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles were turning white and his veins were jutting out from his hand. 

You couldn’t deny that that sight alone was enough to send your mind spiraling elsewhere, but you couldn’t shake the guilty feeling that was beginning to well up in you. Pulling up into the driveway the two of you continued the silent treatment to each other. Walking inside the house you slipped off your heels, your feet relieved to be let out of their cages. You walked over to the kitchen to grab a glass of water but didn’t get the chance to make it to the fridge because Todoroki had come up behind you caging you to the countertop. 

“Sho, I don’t have the energy for this right now”

Moving his hand to your waist he spun you around to face him

“So you have the energy to pay attention to Bakugou but can’t give me the time of day.”

“Oh fuck you.”

Moving yourself out from under his arms you moved to go to the fridge but once again Todoroki interrupted you plans. This time it was with his hands around your waist pulling you into him. 

“I think you might want to rethink your choice of words baby. It’s not wise to upset me further.”

“What are you gonna do-punish me? Please.” Scoffing you tried to move away from him but his grip on you was tighter than you expected. All of this was too much and you were trying your hardest to keep your arousal at bay. You hated fighting with him but something about the way he was going about this was making your brain spark. 

“Is that what you want? Cause I think it can be arranged.”

“Actually what I want is for you to be an adult about this and to stop acting lik-”

“Shut up.”

“What?!”

Catching you off guard he pressed his lips against yours the sexual tension finally dispersing between you too. The frustration and anger of the situation being displayed through the fiery kiss between you two. Todoroki picked you up and placed you on the counter top, his hand trailing up your back and landing at the base of your neck, lacing his fingers into the bottom of your hair. 

Your hands planted on his chest pulling at the fabric of his jacket trying to bring him as close as possible to you. He pulled away from your lips and moved down to your neck finding you sweet spot immediately. He sucked on it until it seemed like it would hurt if he did for a second longer. He moved down to the plunged neckline of your dress and attacked the top of your breast that was exposed. With an airy moan escaping you you found yourself giving up on fighting him.

“Sho~ baby please.”

“I thought I told you to be quiet.” 

You were almost caught off guard by his response but instead was caught off by him picking you up off the counter and carrying you into the bedroom. When he plopped you on the bed, his boutonnière fell on top of you landing in your lap. 

“Now would you look at that. Guess I have to kiss what under it huh? Scoot back for me baby”

Moving back, Todoroki ran his hands up and down your thighs. His lips began kissing up your thighs while he was squeezing the sides of them. When he came close to your heat he breathed on it, pressing his nose into your clit but instead of finishing the job he moved to your other thigh teasing you. 

“Shoto please, I need you. You can’t keep teasing me like this.”

Lifting his head up from in between your legs he looked up at you.

“For someone who is the reason why we’re here in the first place, what makes you think you can order me around like that.” Cocking his eyebrow he awaited your answer, but your answer never came because he was teasing your clit. Rubbing his finger lightly up and down between your folds you couldn’t focus on your words. 

“That what I thought. Now shut the fuck up and let me do my work.”

With that he ripped at your red fishnets creating a hole right where your panties resided. You went to scold him for ripping your tights but before you could say anything he had used his quirk to singe off your panties leaving you bare in his wake. 

“Now, I know you can’t stay quiet for long, but I want you to try your hardest to keep quiet for me baby. Okay?”

You nodded vigorously looking down at him. He took that as his cue and licked a fat slow strip between your lips. Your breath hitched but you kept your silence. When he began circling your clit that when his request became a little more difficult to complete. Picking up his pace he began lapping at your clit making you lose your composure. A moan slipped past your lips. You began bucking your hips into him signaling that you were close to you release, something you should’ve held out on because Todoroki stopped his movements. Bringing his head up to face you he smirked

“See, you can keep quiet. All night you’ve been running your mouth but apparently you only listen when my mouth is on you. Isn’t that right?”

“Yes, but please Sho, please I wanna cum so bad.”

“Don’t worry my little ember, I’ll let you get to your release. You just have to listen to what I say. This time make as much noise as you want. I want to know how good I’m making you feel”

With the tip of his tongue he licked a quick strip across your clit, making you squirm on your back 

“Fuck!”

Chuckling to himself he began lapping at your clit again. Creating figure eights you lost all your senses. You completely gave into him and couldn’t hold back. Moaning, you were writhing in tempo with his tongue lost in the pleasure he was giving you. Your drenched hole began to flutter and heat started to flow to the lower end of your stomach. 

Overwhelmed with your orgasm your body convulsed against Todoroki, but he didn’t stop. He kept thrashing his tongue against your overstimmed cunt. Panting and moaning you grabbed a fistful of his hair trying to lift him away from you but he wrapped his arms around your hips locking you to the bed and his face.

“Shoto, fuck! It’s too much, I-I can’t take it.”

Instead of responding, Todoroki hummed against your pussy the vibrations sending you into your second orgasm. You screamed out Todoroki’s name unable to handle the stimulation running through your body. Todoroki finally lifted himself from your legs, staring at you like a predator does its prey.

“Didn’t know you could do that baby.” A smirk stretching across his face while he removed himself of his jacket and dress shirt.

“Do what-” You cut yourself off suddenly feeling a cold wet spot on the inside of your thigh. The realization of you squirting on his face threw you into a moment of embarrassment where you almost forgot he was in the room. 

“Baby, stay with me. Cause I’m not done with you yet. You have a lot to make up for for the stunts you pulled back at the gala. Don’t you think?”

Kissing you, you tasted the tang of yourself fresh on his tongue. You slid your tongue across his lip, asking for permission and he obliged. Your tongues danced a waltz that only you two knew the steps to. The fire from the both of you radiated off each other and fueled the jealousy ridden passion from tonight. Pulling away from you, he trailed his deft fingers down the valley of your exposed breasts and stopped at the belt of your dress.

“I think it’s time for this to go.”

Gently taking your articles of clothing off you sat up from your flattened position of the bed and pulled your arms from the sleeves. You wrapped your arms around Todoroki pulling him back into the bed and flipped yourself onto of him. You heard his shoes hit the ground and you began working on his neck. Sucking a small hickey onto the skin right underneath his collar bone. Grinding yourself into him you felt his bulge begging to be set from the confinements of his pants. 

Sliding yourself off of him you fumbled with the button of his pants and pulled them off along with his underwear. Taking advantage of your current position you were going to try your hardest to stay in control of it. Coming back up to kiss Todoroki you felt in between your legs for his length and positioned it at your entrance. 

His head was enough to make you go feral, making you want nothing but the rest of him. Hearing Todoroki’s breath hitch was just enough encouragement to push you to fully bottom out on him. The both of you groaned in pleasure at the sensation.

“Fuck you feel so good wrapped around me, baby. Feel good on me. Use me and only me. You’re mine and I’m yours remember that.” 

Though you knew what he meant, his last statement almost rubbed you the wrong way and brought back the frustrations from before. He was still bringing it up and you were getting sick of it. Rolling your hips back and forth on him you decided to use him to your full advantage.

Finding your rhythm you bounced up and down on his cock. Focused on your pleasure and also taking out your emotions on him. His moans were so blissful though that you couldn’t help but be intoxicated by him at this moment.

“Y/N, you’re so good, Fuck! Keep doing that ah~”

Feeling a sudden wave of confidence flood through you you decided to see how far you could take this position of control with him. 

“Yeah, you like that? You’re the only one that gets it. Not Bakugou, nobody but you.” With a ballsy move, you wrapped your hand around his neck and choked him. It didn’t last long though. Within a second you were flipped over, Todoroki hovering over you with sheer lust adorning his eyes. His hand wrapped around your neck, fingers pressing into the blood vessels on either side of your neck.

“Don’t say his fuckin name while I’m inside you. You think of me and only me. Understand?” 

Nodding quickly you recognized your reign of power was now over. Todoroki then slid his length almost all the way out before slamming it back into you kissing your cervix with blatant ferocity.

“Fuck! Sho! Fuck fuck fuck” 

Panting you were desperately looking for something to grab hold of. You shoved your hands into the sheets of the bed before slamming your nails into his back. The pace he set was vicious, clearly taking out his frustration on you.

“All night it’s been about him but right now I want all your focus on me. You belong to me Y/N.”

Grabbing your face he squished your cheeks together forcing your lips to pucker. 

“Look at me while I fuck you. Burn this into your memory of who makes you feel this fucking good.”

You looked at him and felt yourself about to reach your peak. Your fluttering alerted Todoroki to your climax and he pulled out.

“Sho, please. Please don’t do this to me again.”

“Hush and get on your hands and knees.”

Flipping yourself over, you pressed your face into the mattress and wiggled your ass in the air, waiting for Todoroki to line himself up with your sopping hole. 

“There you go, give me those hips. Ahh, fuck baby.”

Again his pace was unrelenting. The fat on your ass rippled with each contact of his hips.

“Come on, you know how to fuck me. Show me you deserve it.”

Todoroki tangled his hand into your hair and brought you up so your back lay flush against his chest. 

“I’m gonna dog fuck you, fill you up with so much of me that you don’t even have time to look at someone else without thinking of me. Every time you think of me you’re gonna think about my cum dripping out of you. Now, who do you belong to.”

“You.”

“Who? Sorry I didn’t hear a name”

“You, Shoto fuck! It’s you, it’s only ever gonna be you. Fucking hell.”

“There it is baby. You’ve been waiting for this, haven’t you? That’s why you’ve been mouthing me off. Well, fuckin take it.”

Letting loose of his grip on your hair and submissiveness taking full control of you, you began whining into the sheets. His cock attacking your walls was sending you into a space of mindlessness. 

“Sho- please, please can I cum. I need to cum so bad.”

“Go ahead baby, squeeze all the cum out of me. I’m gonna make you mine in every sense of the word.”

His thrusts began to falter and became deeper and slower. With one final thrust, you came around him, your pussy dancing around his cock milking him of his seed. 

“Fuck! Holy-”

“Y/N shit~”

Todoroki stilled inside you, hovering over your body while you collapsed into the bed, exhausted mentally and physically. As Todoroki pulled out of you, you felt so empty but didn’t have the energy to move anymore. 

As if he could read your mind Todoroki picked you up and pulled you toward the top of the bed rest you on a few pillows. He stood up to walk to the bathroom and grab a warm towel to clean you up. Coming back into the room he kneeled down to your core, gently cleaning your sensitive areas.

“Am I hurting you?”

“No, I’m okay, just keep doing that. It feels nice actually” Sighing you let your body fully relax into the mattress underneath you. Todoroki stood up and tossed the towel into the hamper and came back to lay on the bed with you. Giving your poor attempt at grabby hands due to your exhaustion he chuckled and slid next to you. Grabbing your hand in his he rubbed his thumb over the side of your hand.

You scooted closer to him moving his arm so you could lay your head on his chest. With all the attitude having left your body you were completely soft with him. 

“Are you still mad at me?”

Instant regret filled him, all of his actions from the night finally catching up with him.

“Y/N, I could never stay mad at you. Sometimes I don’t realize how much I ignore my emotions. I’m sorry for having you be at the receiving end of my frustrations. I just can’t bear the thought of losing you. You mean so much to me.”

“It’s okay, at least the sex was good. I would just hate you ever truly being mad at me and I wanted to make sure.”

“Y/N. I am thoroughly and undoubtedly obsessed with you. You’re my little ember and I can’t imagine my life without you in it. I couldn’t ask for anything more in life because you’ve given me everything I could’ve ever wanted.” 

With a smile across your face and sleep beginning to take over your eyelids, you tried your best to stay up with him while he confessed himself to you.

“You know I’ll love you forever Sho.”

Todoroki looked down at you with a dubious gaze trying to pick apart your affirmation. 

“Forever?”

“Forever Shoto.”

“Good, because I could use a bit of forever in my life.” 

[houseboatisland]

I'm rather curious for your own takes on Thom Thom~✨💙

Edit credit to @/ComradeOpThomas from Twitter, this is my ideal Thomas!

(Season 5 Thomas is the best Thomas, I don’t make the rules)

I started this hoping for it not to become a whole biography, but it just kept pouring out of me, so here's a very, very long post indeed lol

Thomas is NOT an L.B.S.C.R. E2 Class. He’s actually a unique design born to the North Western Railway in its earliest days… and in remarkably sad circumstances.

When the Railway Executive Committee first took over in August 1914, they were repulsed at the state of the Sudrian railways. Here were several argumentative companies operating in isolation from one another, with geriatric engines and stock, and one of them hadn't even run a train or maintained its permanent way since the start of the century. A key agenda item of the R.E.C.'s was a continuous, efficient railway system to quickly move men and materiel to the Island's eastern coast were Ireland to side with Kaiser Bill against John Bull. The existing standard gauge railways would have to be more or less torn up and rebuilt from scratch, and several new miles of track laid in to make for a single fluid network.

This required, among other things, many new engines. Several came over the Channel as and when could be spared by the Mainland, but as it became increasingly clear that the war would not be over "by Christmas," this wasn't an ideal long-term solution. The R.E.C. was especially upset that it had to put so many of its tender engines onto construction trains when their strength could be better used on other work. Two tank engines off the former Wellsworth and Suddery Railway, No. 1 "Short" and No. 2 "Stumpy" were by now nearing fifty years old, and exhausted mechanically.

The R.E.C., out to keep costs down and use resources to the fullest, ordered the N.W.R. to scrap these two engines and use the best parts of each to create one new engine. Measurements were taken, plans were hastily drawn up, and Short and Stumpy were quietly cut up in January 1915. Several fittings were made new for what odds and ends neither engine could contribute a usable part. The resulting new engine was "Thomas," who was put to work fresh off the shop floor.

Thomas at this point became the N.W.R.’s No. 1 quite by accident. He was the first engine to be built at Crovan’s Gate, and the REC misinterpreted this on his builder’s plates as an intention by the N.W.R. TO make him No. 1. So when Thomas gained his number, the R.E.C. and the N.W.R. both assumed this was deliberate by one another. And it was just too much of a hassle and too unimportant to change, so No. 1 he stayed.

As for his name, Thomas is named after Thomas Reginald Payne, the North Western Railway's first Chief Mechanical Engineer. Payne had made Thomas' construction a reality, from drawing up his blueprints to supervising his piecing together. Payne, who was CME from 1914 to his death in 1951, never forgot this connection to "his" engine, and often wanted to be on the shop floor whenever Thomas was in for repairs.

Thomas’ “infancy” was in a word, harsh. He was working around the clock, surrounded by engines who came and went, and did little if any socializing. Foremen were ordering him about at every turn. His first friend ever was the new N.W.R. No. 2, Edward, the former Wellsworth and Suddery Railway’s No. 5 and only tender engine, who knew his old crewmates were chopped up to make Thomas. Thankfully, Edward knew better than to let Thomas in on this, lest he give him some sort of existential crisis, and he made quick work of making himself a mentor to the little engine.

In these conditions, Thomas’ “cheeky” and anti-authoritarian streak took shape. His whole life thus far had been work and taking lumps from his superiors, most of whom were English and not Sudrian. This morphed into a disrespect for big engines, who wanted him to be their errand boy as construction work began to ebb and focus shifted to running trains. Ever the contrarian, Thomas only doubles down on his disrespect for tender engines when he finds out that that’s “the traditional order of things.” Edward is of course exempt from this attitude, but in his tensest moments Thomas can even lose patience with HIM momentarily.

The war finally ends. January 1919 sees the N.W.R. out to make an identity for itself as peacetime takes hold and Parliament quietly rumbles about Grouping or outright Nationalization. Thomas is the first engine to wear "Hatt Blue with Red Stripes," the company's planned standard livery. This isn't unique to him for long, however, and Thomas' new line of work from hereon is Station Pilot for Vicarstown. Needless to say this is upsetting to him. He's not moving up and down the Island like he was when building the railway. He's still rushed off his wheels. He's expected to be answerable to tender engines as he makes up their trains. Most importantly, he's still having as much difficulty as before to make time to make friends. This new job is in every respect everything Thomas could have wanted to avoid, and there's no telling if he'll ever even get out of it. January 1919 is thus where "Wants to See the World" Thomas begins.

Thomas still gets to see Edward regularly, and he is for a pinch joined by two other tank engines shunting at Vicarstown. They're also ex-Wellsworth and Suddery Railway, Nos. 3 and 4 "Edwin" and "Victor." Thomas befriends Victor, who is a friendly old joker, but dislikes Edwin who has become cranky in his old and as a 2-4-0T has a tendency to slip and not be of much help. They leave him too, in 1922, when The Fat Director relocates them to run other branchlines on the Island. So, 1922 onward, we meet Thomas as the sole pilot, thoroughly busy and thoroughly lonely.

This seems more or less canon, but The Fat Director probably sent Thomas to Wellsworth after his runaway with Edward's trucks in anticipation of giving him the Ffarquhar Branch once he was a matured engine. He didn't give Thomas the line just because he rescued James in fine style, that was really what made his mind up.

Thomas looks kindly enough on Henry as a big engine at this time, he and Edward as mentioned aren't necessarily the kinds of "Big Engines" he dislikes. He'll occasionally give him a tease or two, or lose patience with his health, (something he now deeply regrets years later,) but there's no real malice in it. Think of him as the little brother poking fun at his bigger brother for having one arm in a cast, but altogether still feeling sorry for him and accommodating him how he can. Henry for his part appreciates Thomas, but takes his teasing very seriously considering how sensitive and implicating it is to, you know, his whole existence.

My idea of Thomas' relationship with Gordon is heavily inspired by @/mean-scarlet-deceiver's: Thomas is initially awed by Gordon's arrival and finally confident the N.W.R. can survive, but quickly resents him when he shows his true colors as a "big engine" through and through. I wouldn't even call Gordon and Thomas "friendly" until their alliance at Toryreck Mine. From 1923 all the way up to then, depending on when you place it, they... legitimately dislike each other. There's no affection beneath all the ribbing and jibes, they ACTUALLY disliked each other that whole period of time.

I'm still hashing out my headcanon of 98462 and 87546, (just know that those aren't actually their numbers,) but it's safe to say Thomas hates their guts, and '62 and '46 hate his guts in return as a servant willing to speak up for himself.

Thomas and James were a couple from 1924 to 1933, when they broke up amid the Big Engine Strike. I'd really rather reserve this for a post of its own at a later date.

Thomas and Percy are good friends, but I wouldn't go so far as to call them "best friends" like the TVS has so often hammered in. They clearly come to blows whenever the tension's too much. I like to explain that away as a shift in Thomas' character. With him doing more passenger work as Percy and Toby handle the stone trains, and his increasing fame, Thomas begins looking down on Percy, not long after he transferred to Ffarquhar in 1955 in fact. This might also have to do with unresolved feelings between them both. (Hey, remember that little green engine you kissed once just to try it over twenty years ago? He's your roommate now, probably forever. Play nice!)

[mggssocks]

Followed

Not My Gif!

Pairing: Fem!Reader x Spencer Reid

Content Warnings: None just fluff :)

Summary: Spencer makes an Instagram and stumbles across reader’s page.

Word Count: 1,899 words

A/N: This is Season 10 Spencer with Season 13 looks. Also, instead of it being Kate on the team, i put Emily instead because who doesn’t love the season 3-7 team? Also I might make a part 2 depending on how much this blows up. Honestly i’d be happy if i got one like. Anyways.. hope you enjoy!!!

masterlist // part 2 // part 3

It was 8:00 in the morning. Spencer walked in the doors of the bullpen to the bau. He sat his satchel down and began to settle in for a long day of work. It was pretty early so the team wasn’t in yet. Except for Aaron Hotchner who had gotten in an hour prior to Spencer and been in his office ever since. Apparently others had the same ‘get to work early’ mindset as Spencer. Spencer opened a case file but his attention was quickly whipped away due to the sound of the door opening. He sees Penelope Garcia with all her attention focused on her phone. Spencer quirked his eyebrows when she bumped into a fellow coworker and her attention remained on her phone while quickly mumbling a quick “sorry”. As she passed his desk, Spencer decided it would be the great time to speak. 

“Hey, Garcia.” Her feet came to a stop and her head snapped up at him. 

“Boy wonder! I’m so glad you’re here. I really need someone to talk to because if I don’t I’m going to explode!” She sits in the chair across from his desk. 

“Is everything alright?” He leaned back in his chair. 

“No… no everything is not alright. If anything.. everything is all wrong. Very very wrong. I-“ she takes in a deep breath “I was stalking Kevin’s page because the other day I seen him at the mall with another girl. And while I was 56 weeks down in his page, I accidentally liked a picture.” She explained, in a huff. 

“I’m afraid I don’t follow.” Spencer was even more confused now than before she started. 

“I liked a picture that he posted 56 weeks ago!” Her eyes were wide.

“How is that a bad thing?” His lips pouted as he’d never understand social media. 

“Ugh! Reid, you really need to get with the program and get you an Instagram. That means his picture was old and now he knows that I was looking at his page. You understand now?” She asked. 

“Oh. Yeah I understand. It’s bad that he knows you were looking at his page.” He asked as Prentiss, JJ, and Morgan had walked in. 

“Yes. And now I must go into the bat cave and wait for him to call or text me and ask what me lurking on his page was about.” She whined as she stomped her way to her office. 

“What was that about?” Prentiss asked, setting her bags down on her desk. 

“Uhh- rough morning” Spencer shrugged, still not really understanding the whole social media thing. 

“Hey do you guys have an Instagram?” He asked the three. 

“Yeah but I’m barely on it.” Prentiss answered.

“Same here” says Morgan as he takes a seat at his desk. 

“Yeah but I only get on to post the boys and myself sometimes” answers JJ. 

“What about Hotch and Rossi?” He asked.

“Yup! Rossi likes to post about his expensive wine and cigars. Hotch posts Jack every once in a while and a throwback Thursday.” JJ says. 

Spencer’s eyebrows furrowed for what seems to be the 100th time that day. 

“He doesn’t know what that is” Prentiss looks over to JJ.

“It’s something you post like an old picture of yourself every Thursday.” Morgan explains.

“Do you guys do that?” Spencer asked.

“I did last Thursday.” JJ pulls out her phone and opened the app. “This was right after Emily, Penelope, and I caught a guy who was trying to pick up Prentiss by pretending to be an FBI agent a few years ago.” She chuckled showing him a picture. 

Spencer takes her phone in his hand and examines the post. 142 likes. 57 comments. He clicks on her name which takes it to her page. 302 followers. As he scrolls, he sees a picture the team took a while ago and sees a little person profile thing the corner and clicks on it causing other names tagged to each individual team member. Except him. After he examined all of their profiles, he gives JJ back her phone and gets to work like the rest of them. He felt a little left out but he knew it was because of his own decisions and not his team. He liked that they didn’t press him about having a social media because they new he was more old school than anything. And it was ironic because he wastage youngest member of the team with the more old school habits. 

When Spencer got home he decided he wanted the social media app. The idea of being able to share with his friends and only his friends excited him. Being able to post about his favorite things for his friends to see without talking their ears off.

He opened his phone and went to the app store, typing “instagram” into the search bar. He followed the sites instructions as he made his account. Using a snapshot he took of his bookshelf as his profile picture. He sees the option to add the people in his contact list which was only his team, mom, and his mother’s caretaker. But everyone’s profile popped up and he quickly followed each and every one of them. Except for his mom and her caretaker of course. 

Soon enough, he got a follow back from Garcia, Hotch, Rossi, and JJ in that order. Morgan and Prentiss weren’t lying when they said they weren’t on often.

After two weeks, Spencer hasn’t posted anything yet, not knowing what should go on his profile. Morgan and Prentiss ended up following him back and the app ended up adjusting to his interests. Nothing but accounts about interesting facts, books, and doctor who. 

It was Friday night and the team had just got back from a case in Chicago. Spencer opened the door to his apartment and set his satchel down on the couch, exhausted. His mind wonders to get something to eat being that he wonders to get something to eat being that he hasn’t ate since before they caught the unsub. Which was about 5 hours and 7 minutes ago but he still needed to get something into his system. Spencer opened his fridge and sees 3 day old Chinese takeout. He shrugs and pops it into the microwave while looking for a book of his to reread while he eats. After he finishes dinner, he gets on his phone and subconsciously pulls up the app. He clicks onto his explore page to discover something else he likes. While scrolling, he sees a picture of someone reading and clicks on it.

765 likes

Yourfriend’sig whenever people ask me what to give you for your birthday or Christmas, I always tell them to get you a book or something green and it works every single time. Happy Birthday to my best buddy, @yourinstagram !

View all 84 comments

Spencer smiles and clicks the heart button and bookmarks it to look at later.  He liked the picture. Both the picture and caption reminded him a lot of his own love for books and the color green (hence his apartment). 

Once he got out of the shower, he brushed his teeth. He found himself subconsciously scrolling through his instagram bookmarks to find her post. He doesn’t know what it was but something about the picture brought comfort to him. As he brushed his teeth, he clicked on the post once again.This time, he actually clicked on your account. It was a private account with 186 followers. The bio read:

Y/N... bookworm.

Her profile picture consisted of a black cat surrounded by either a bunch of well taken care of plants or artificial ones. His finger hovered over the blue “follow” button. As he bent down to spit his toothpaste out, his thumb accidentally clicked the follow button. But he didn't realize so until he looked down again to see the “follow” button replaced with “requested”. His heart basically drops out of his ass. He quickly clicks the button again, taking back his follow. 

It was now one in the morning, Spencer laid in bed awake staring at his ceiling. Once again, he clicks onto the app. He scrolled down his timeline and saw a picture Penelope posted of one of her new desk animals with the caption “Got her at a thrift shop! Isn’t she cute??”. He saw that Hotch and JJ liked 45 other people. JJ also commented with two red hearts. Spencer likes the post and keeps scrolling. His thoughts wander to the post about the girl again. He’s never thought about a social media post this much since he’s created an account. He wonders what sparked his interest so much about this one. As he makes his way to the post, clicking on her account. Debating if he should follow her. She’s a total stranger. Do the others follow strangers? There’s no way JJ knows 302 people in real life. He mentally shrugs and presses the follow button. Requested. Again.

He swipes out of her account back onto the post now seeing that she commented on it.

yourinstagram thank you, bubs! ily to the moon n back <3333

It was commented thirty six seconds ago. Meaning she’s currently active. Again, Spencer’s heart sinks and he immediately regrets his decision. Going back and unfollowing her. He doesn’t know what to do with himself. He’s a mess. Over a stranger. But he feels like an idiot. Reacting the way that he did just because he saw that she was online. So he goes and follows her.... again.

After clearing out all of his apps, he turns off his phone and lays down trying to get some sleep before work in a few hours. His thoughts wander to her. What she was like. if she was nice or mean. If she was socially awkward or very outgoing. Before his thoughts could get too far into what she was like, he receives a notification from instagram. He opens his phone and clicks on the notification. His heart began to pound when he saw it.

yourinstagram would like to send you a message! 

He clicks on it.

yourinstagram You’ve followed and unfollowed me about 5 times in the past 3 hours. Is there something I can help you with?

Spencer completely forgot that other people got notifications and now he felt like some kind of creep.

spencerreid I’m sorry. I came across your friend’s Instagram post wishing you a happy birthday and i guess i got curious and wanted to follow you if that makes any sense. 

He felt so dumb. 

yourinstagram and following me once wasn’t enough for some reason???

spencerreid Sorry about that. I’m new to this whole social media thing and don’t follow any strangers. You are the first person I’m following that I don’t know in real life. Again, my apologies for the disturbance. I’ll unfollow you’re account If you’re uncomfortable with me. 

yourinstagram i just hope that you’re not one of my raging exes, someone trying to catfish me, or a psychopath lol.

Spencer smiled.

spencerreid Nope. Just me.

She leaves him one read. Spencer’s smile fades when he doesn’t see any three loading dots. She wasn’t texting him back. As he’s about to exit the app, he sees two notifications. 

yourinstagram has accepted your follow request!

yourinstagram has requested to follow you.

********

I hoped you like this!!! If this blows up,i will do another chapter!

[setsuntamew]

So, Persona 5 Royal, huh?

Full disclosure: I had gotten about halfway through November on Wednesday and finished it out Saturday night, which took uhhh about 65-70 hours? Some of that was sitting there waiting for the PS4 controller to recharge or listening to music in the Thieves Den while eating, but I still feel like I need to own up to how extremely bad I am at making good decisions with my life XD

MOVING ON, THOUGH, HOLY SHIT. P5 was a very good game, but Royal’s additions & changes made it incredible. I like the ending way more; I think it’s more emotionally fulfilling and meaningful, especially with everyone’s more defined future plans. Definitely felt like everyone had more growth in the end!! Which is something I’d always thought P5 was lacking.

Snip snip for spoilers and the fact that this post ended up being too damn long, oops! the last third is basically Akechi feels and analyzing his ending, so......yeah XD

Part of why I plowed through SO much of Royal in so little time is....Akechi XD Like okay, this is my stupid fandom blog, I can be excited about him all I want!!! I got to Sae’s Palace and just....I couldn’t put it down. @dragonofeternal​ and I ordered an embarrassing amount of takeout instead of cooking because we just had to see how everything with Maruki and the third semester was gonna go down. I’d already been dying along the way because Akechi’s confidant dates are so good, I just. Fuck!!!

Also, look, for the entirity of Shido’s boss fight and the depths of Mementos/Yaldabaoth/etc, we’d look at each other every few minutes and just be like AKECHI SHOULD BE HERE WITH US, HE DESERVES TO GET HIS VENGEANCE ON HIS SHITTY DAD AND FORCED DESTINY!!!!!

December 24th had to be the longest god damn day in Akira’s life because like. Final exam grades are posted in the morning! He goes to school and then dives into hell, crawls his way back out, briefly dies by fading from human cognition, fights an actual fucking god, and then....ends up dissociating in Shibuya until Sae shows up and is like “oh hey thanks for everything you did, please sign up for being arrested now.” And while he’s still reeling from that, Akechi walks up to take his place, like some kind of bullshit knight in shining armor schtick, and leaves no room for conversation.

AND THEN WE HAVE TO GO ON A DATE

I romanced Hifumi this time around, because I wanted Akria to bang a girl who is just so incredibly out of his league, but....it’s not necessarily that I forgot I was dating someone, more that it had been *so many hours of plot* that I was emotionally exhausted. Like, Hifumi texted me and I was just like. Right. RIGHT. It’s still Christmas Eve, somehow. I was at *school* this morning. The whole world merged with Mementos briefly in the middle of this, Akechi is somehow alive, and I guess I’m going on a date now????

I do appreciate how many “god I’m just dissociating my way through this” conversation options there were for the date, tbh. I feel bad though, I really like Hifumi, but I feel like Akira is not giving a date his full emotional attention at that specific time. It feels a bit like emotional whiplash, more so than I remember it being in P5? Maybe it’s because I played it 4 years ago and there wasn’t the added emotional weight of Akechi’s reappearance, but it was just like....a lot, in Royal.

AND THEN THE NEW YEAR HAPPENED. I’d been spoiled on large parts of the third semester, mostly because Royal’s been out for a year already and I’m too curious for my own good. I’d also somehow lied to myself, saying I didn’t have time to play another Persona game right now, and yet here I am, 171 hours of game play within exactly a month, kicking myself for not knowing how deep in Persona hell I would get XD

Which is to say, as soon as the new year started, it felt I was drowning in anxiety. I knew something was wrong, I knew they were in a false reality, but knowing that sure as fuck didn’t make it easier to go through. If anything, it was somehow worse, knowing that it was all gonna come crumbling down, but I didn’t yet know the exact details, only the broad strokes of it. Just. Every time someone talked about something that was wrong, my heart would clench.

God, I’m so fucking tired, I pulled an all-nighter on Friday so I could get through Royal before having to work on Sunday, and I am feeling it right now. Life tips: don’t do what I do XD

Every moment with Akechi felt like borrowed time, at least for me, because I knew what was coming. I spent so much time in Mementos with him; I ended up putting just him and Akira in my party and plowing through everything, including trouncing the Reaper over and over just for the hell of it. I got his ultimate weapons, I spent so many nights in the jazz club with him that he ran out of dialogue options, and I still took him back for more. I accidentally failed to EVER trigger Sumire’s Showtime because every fight was just Akira and Akechi against the world, because fuck it, I’m playing this for fun!! If I want to play with them in stupid costumes and no one else in the party, I’m gonna. Royal did such an incredible job giving Akechi more depth and development: it was all I could hope for, and it made it that much fucking worse to know what was in store for him.

Somehow, I thought it would be harder for me to make the decision to refuse Maruki’s deal, since fuck, fuck what I wouldn’t give for Akechi to be alive???? But I barely hesitated, only really stopping because I had to emotionally brace myself for it, because a reality where he can’t carve out his own fate would be a disrespect to everything their relationship is built on.

I have a whole shit ton of feelings about post-beating Maruki but they’re basically all Akechi related meta so somehow they ended up at the end of this post, I’m sorry XD

I understand that they had to keep the going to jail bit because 1) Akechi didn’t turn himself in, Akira did and 2) it leads to the final events of the game, but let me just say....the emotional roller coaster of fighting Maruki, almost failing multiple times, waking up in jail, the Phantom Thieves & friends getting Akira out of jail, celebrating that, and then getting thrown into Valentines Day was a LOT for my heart to take. Once again, didn’t forget I had a girlfriend, just got too invested in the plot to really be thinking about her. It’s less than two weeks after the fight with Maruki and somehow, everything is supposed to be okay????

The scene with everyone talking about their future plans is such good character growth, though. Everyone feels like they’ve truly grown and are making decisions that, even though they might be painful or hard at times, are ultimately very important to them. It’s a really good contrast to the “almost everyone goes to Shujin and they all stay in Tokyo forever without doing anything for themselves” Maruki’s perfect reality bad end.

Standing in the Underground Mall on White Day, being told I had to get flowers but finally being able to have control of Akira again was....so bittersweet. The fact that the location of the date is the aquarium is a low fucking blow, and I almost threw the controller across the room I was so upset. Like. THE AQUARIUM IS UNLOCKED BECAUSE AKECHI HAS TICKETS HOW FUCKING DARE SOJIRO SUGGEST IT LIKE MY HEART ISN’T STILL ACHING????? God, speaking of that: The fucking god damn Featherman video game tore my heart out because I ended up playing it WHILE WORKING ON SHIDO’S PALACE and I cried a ton about Gray Pigeon because of course they had to dig the emotional knife in even deeper!! Just fuck me up, it’s fine, I’m just dying!!!!!!!!!!!!

I ended up scrolling through his texts to find the group chats that still had Akechi in them, and fuck, it was a LOT. Like. Maybe it’s because I’m too invested in the two of them, but it was probably the worst emotional whiplash of the whole game. Like, how am I supposed to go play happy with anyone while staring at texts from a reality built of lies? It wasn’t real but the proof lives on in his phone and his heart, and I’m still fucked up over it.

HOWEVER. FUCKING. I SPENT LIKE HALF AN HOUR BEING EMOTIONALLY COMPROMISED ABOUT ALL THIS AND THEN DISCOVERED THE BASTARD STILL HAD ALL HIS EQUIPMENT, INCLUDING THE ULTIMATE MALE ARMOR!!! He returned his shit after Sae’s Palace even though he thought Akira was dead, but this time it didn’t get fucking returned to my inventory, so he must have fucking run off with all his shit!!!!!!! Why the hell did none of it get returned if he was never alive in the true reality? Like I know it'll be returned for a new game+ but I like to nitpick game mechanics for story reasons, because one of the things I love most about video games is the experience of them as another layer to the story. The texts from the third semester shouldn’t exist anymore, since they never really existed, but there they are. Akechi insisted that he has a gap in his memory after Shido’s Palace up until seeing Akira on Christmas Eve, but who can say that wasn’t related to Maruki tampering with reality or some other Persona-related reason?

I mean. I got the full and complete True Ending; I saw him in the train station. If that’s not Akechi, then who the fuck is it? Atlus made sure to put the work in to make him a part of not just the main story but also, especially, the third semester, and for what....to have his final time on screen be as the butt of the joke, squished underneath everyone in the Mona-copter? As much as it hurts, his end in Shido’s Palace matters; it fits his character and he gets to go out fighting- carving his own path, really. In Royal, barring the tiny glimpse of someone who’s probably him in the train station, the last we see of him is when he watches Joker let go of the rope to finish off Maruki. I know we got the heart to heart where Akira agrees to reject Maruki’s deal and Akechi insists that he’d rather be dead than live in a false reality, but.....no one even says goodbye to him. It’s tragic, it’s painfully lonely, but it doesn’t feel right for such a major character.

Also, as undignified as it is, for the first time ever, Akechi looks like he actually belongs in the Phantom Thieves in that final moment. He’s never been the butt of their jokes before; they always kept him at arms’ reach and he took himself too seriously to be included, but for that brief moment, it really felt like he was part of their group. He stopped lying about himself for their last month together, and so even if they don’t all like him, they can make that decision based on the truth, instead of layers of lies. His death is all the more tragic for this; a life cut short just when he’s finally finding a place he belongs. But his death was already painful; why make it so, so much worse?

Final thing: I’m gonna be spending a ton of time in the Thieves Den trying to find Akechi’s opinions on everything, but also....hey. HEY. What do those six stars that Jose (probably?) painted on the wall mean? Is it just a reference to Persona 6???? LIKE????? I HAVE QUESTIONS. SO, SO MANY QUESTIONS!!!!

Anyway, I’ve gotta go cry into my Starbucks and desperately try to focus on actually doing my job at work, but I loved Royal deeply and cannot wait to drown in it ;w;

[seasonsofeverlark]

Everdeen Scrooge

Author: @norbertsmom​

Prompt: Hunger Games Christmas Carol [submitted by @katnissandpeeta125​]

Rating: T

Summary: Several years after the war that ended President Snow’s tyranny over Panem, Twenty two year old Katniss Everdeen doesn’t want anything to do with the new Christmas holiday instituted by the New Panem Government. Can a ghostly visit make her change her mind?

Author’s Note: Special thanks to @mega-aulover​, my friend and beta, and all around expert on A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens, which this fic is based on. This post includes chapters 1 and 2 out of a total of 6. The other chapters will be posted separately.

___________

Chapter 1

Katniss expels a puffy cloud of air then releases her bow string. There’s silence for a moment as the arrow flies.

  “You got it,” Gale exclaims as he stands up from their blind. 

  In the distance, gobbling can be heard as several turkey hens flee, a large gobbler lay still in the snow with an arrow sticking out of its side.

  The snow crunches under their boots as they approach it. Katniss pulls out her arrow as Gale picks up the bird by its feet. “This is going to make a great Christmas dinner, Catnip.” 

  “Nope,” Katniss says, shaking her head. “That bird is going to make several meals for the next few weeks.”

  “But,” Gale tries, as he loops the turkey strap around its feet and neck.

  “Don’t worry, I’ll give you your share. You did help me track it, and now you can carry it.”

  “What about Christmas dinner tomorrow?” Gale asks as he lifts the strap over his shoulder.

  “I’m not wasting all that meat on one meal,” Katniss says as they start walking back to town. “I need to make sure we have food for the rest of the winter. Who knows when I’ll get a chance to hunt again.” 

  “Are you coming to our party tonight? You mom and sister are planning to be there. I heard them planning it with my mom.”

  “Nope. I’ve got to get a decent night sleep so I can come back out hunting in the morning.”

  “Come on, Catnip. The new government has given us tons of opportunities, better pay, more affordable food, better houses even. You don’t need to hunt every day. You really need to spend some time with your friends and family.”

  While it’s true that the new Panem government has provided better lives for all of Panem. After the war was over and President Snow was executed, a new government was created with representatives from each of the districts. Katniss still has a problem trusting that things won’t go back to the way they were before the revolution. 

  She and her family nearly died of starvation after her father died in a mine explosion. Ever since, she’s been very frugal with food and with money. Gale used to be as frugal as she is, but ever since he fell in love with Leevy Johnstone, he’s been different. She’s tired of the same old argument. 

  Her best client, Haymitch Abernathy was dead. Gone these past few months. He was a victor and a war hero, but no one paid him no mind because he kept people at a distance. Just like she tried to do. 

  He paid Katniss extra coin for good game meat on a regular basis. She missed the old drunk codger.  When he died not many people went to his funeral, only Katniss, Peeta Mellark, and the old Capitol Escort, Effie trinket attended. 

   “Let’s just get this turkey in cold storage so we can go into town to trade the rest of our haul,” Katniss gripes, ignoring his plea.

  After the oohs and aahs from her mother and sister over the turkey, and disappointment in their eyes from the news of Katniss’ plans for the turkey, she and Gale head to town to finish their trades. 

  With trading at the now legal hob, and other merchants in town complete, Katniss and Gale head to Mellark’s Bakery for their last stop of the day. Even though Seam folks are now welcome in the front of the bakery, trades are still conducted at the back door.

  Katniss climbs the steps to knock on the door, while Gale stands at the bottom of the steps digging around in his game bag for his trade. She wishes she could have gone to the bakery on her own, but Gale said he needs to get something too. 

  The youngest Mellark, Peeta answers the door. Peeta has been in charge of the bakery for four years now, after his two older brothers married girls who inherited their own family businesses. 

  “Merry Christmas, Katniss,” Peeta greets with a warm smile. “Are you here to trade?”

  Katniss is momentarily blinded by his warm easy smile. It always takes her a second to snap back into the moment. She really enjoys when they spend time after their trades chatting, but first there’s trading to do. She needs to stay focused. 

  “Yes I am here to trade,” she says as she holds up a pair of fat squirrels. 

  “You always get them through the eye,” Peeta says, rubbing the back of his neck.

  “She sure does,” Gale says as he walks up the steps behind her.

  Katniss clenches her jaw and levels Gale a shut up look. She needs a good sale. “I know how much you like squirrels, so I got an extra one for you, because I know tomorrow you’ll be closed. I wanted to make sure you have enough game meat to last you-" 

  "One day,” Peeta says, smiling, his blue eyes sparkling.

  Gale covers a laugh from behind her.

  “A lot can happen in one day,” Katniss defends. “Besides, you could always bring a dish to one of your brothers’ homes. I’m sure they could use the extra game meat. How many nephews do you have now?”

  “Two with one more on the way,” Peeta says brightly.

  “See I’m sure they could use the extra meat.”

  “Okay, hold on; let me get the bread for you and some coin for the extra meat.”

  “Perfect,” Katniss says, nodding.

  When her trade is done Gale steps up with a rabbit from his bag. “A small bag of cookies, please.” 

“Sure thing,” Peeta says, taking the rabbit into the kitchen.

  After Peeta leaves, Katniss gives Gale an incredulous look.

  “They’re a present for Posy,” Gale defends. “She’s really into the spirit of Christmas, especially the presents,” he says with a laugh.

  After Peeta returns with the bag of cookies, Gale tucks them into his game bag.

  Katniss and Gale turn to walk back down the steps, but Peeta speaks up before they get very far, “Hey, Katniss. Could I ask you something?”

  Kaniss looks back to Peeta, but he’s looking at Gale. 

  The two men seem to come to some kind of silent agreement and Gale says, “I’m going to head over to the sweet shop for more presents for Posy. I’ll meet you out front, Catnip.”

  Katniss is a bit stunned by their exchange, but shakes her head and walks back to Peeta. “What did you want to ask me?” she asks, hesitantly.

  Peeta stammers for a minute, “Would you, ah,” he rubs the back of his neck and looks down at his shoes before blurting out, “would you go out on a date with me?” He looks back up; his blue eyes plead for her answer as his cheeks turn red.

  “Oh, I-I don’t date,” Katniss stammers out before running down the steps. She runs down the alley between the shops and almost collides with Gale, who could not have made it to the sweet shop and back already.

   "You know you were cold toward Peeta,” Gale tells her.

  “I was not.”

  “Katniss, listen to me. that Merchant is decent folk and you treat him…”

  “Like what?” Katniss asks, narrowing her eyes.

  “Like that,” Gale points to her face. “You need to stop pushing people away. One day you’re going to find yourself all alone.” He walks away toward the sweet shop, shaking his head.

  Katniss brushes what Gale has to say aside. Just because he forgot what life is like when you don’t have enough food to eat, she’ll never forget. She heads toward home without him.

  “Come on, Katniss,” Prim begs from her seat at the dinner table. Her fingers tangled in the ribbon she’s trying to tie. “I need your help wrapping these gifts for the Hawthornes.” 

  “Sorry Prim,” Katniss replies from her spot on the floor. “I need to finish the fletching for my arrows. It’s supposed to be unseasonably warm tomorrow, so I can’t miss a day of hunting when I don’t know if I’ll get another break this winter.”

  Mrs. Everdeen sets the stew she’s been working to simmer and walks over to help Prim out, deftly tying the ribbon in a well-practiced bow.

  “Thanks mom,” Prim says, before turning back to Katniss.

  “But Katniss, tomorrow’s Christmas. You can’t spend the day hunting; you were out there all day today. What about presents?”

  Katniss sets down her work and looks up at her sister. “Prim, You’re eighteen now. You know we don’t need presents, right? It’s just a made-up holiday the new Capitol thrust upon us to get people to spend money on frivolous gifts nobody needs anyway. We can celebrate the new year next week, like always.”

  “That’s not true, Katniss. It’s not a made up holiday. We used to celebrate with daddy. Right mom?”

  “That’s right, Prim,” their mother agrees with a nod.

  “Well, that was a long time ago,” Katniss huffs. “Things have changed, if you haven’t noticed.

   “So you’re not coming to the party at the Hawthornes tonight?” Mrs. Everdeen asks as she ties the ribbon on the last gift.

  “Sorry, nope. I already told Gale I wasn’t coming. I’m going to get to bed as soon as I’m done here so I can head out at the break of dawn and spend all day in the woods,” Katniss explains.

  Prim turns back to her mother. “Mom, make her come with us, please.”

  “I can’t make her go, Prim,” Mrs. Everdeen says as she caresses Prim’s cheek. She heads back to her stew pot and begins to ladle several servings into a crock, leaving just enough in the pot for Katniss’ dinner. “Put the gifts in a sack, please. Katniss has a mind of her own, always has. If she doesn’t want to go, we can’t make her, but I think she’ll be missing out on some good fun.” Mrs. Everdeen looks over at Katniss with a pointed look.

  “Yeah, yeah,” Katniss says. “Someone needs to make sure we have food to eat around here.” And with that, the conversation is over. 

  Prim and Mrs. Everdeen head over to the Hawthorne’s home and Katniss cleans up her work, eats her stew, and heads off to bed.

  Chapter 2

  Katniss is startled awake by the sound of someone stumbling around in the kitchen. She looks across the room and sees Buttercup standing guard on the empty bed. Her mother and Prim are still at the party.

  It’s not unusual for a patient to show up for her mother in the middle of the night, but they don’t usually just walk right in. Katniss slips out of bed without making a sound, signaling to Buttercup to keep quiet, but he jumps off the bed and runs down the hall. Katniss grabs the large stick she keeps under her bed in case a critter gets in. It should take care of any unwanted human as well.

  She creeps out of the bedroom and avoids stepping on the creaky floorboard just past her mother’s bedroom. As she peeks around the doorframe into the kitchen she sees someone rifling through the kitchen cabinets.

  As she tip-toes up to the trespasser, silent as a mouse, she raises her weapon above her head with both hands. If she’s going to strike, she’s going to make sure she does some damage. She takes in a deep breath and the intruder must hear because he straightens up and begins to turn around.

  She hears the stranger say, “You don’t want to do that,” before she brings the club down with all her might. But it doesn’t make contact until it slams into the floor. She must have squeezed her eyes closed before swinging because she has to open them to see how she could have possibly missed at this short distance.

  She looks up and sees the transparent, smiling face of Haymitch Abernathy, District 12’s recently deceased victor. “Nice to see you too, Sweetheart. Got anything to drink around here?”

  Katniss stumbles back, dragging her club with her until the backs of her legs hit the armchair in the living room and she plops down. “H-h-how can you be here? You’re d-d-dead,” she sputters as she pulls her knees up to her chest and wraps her arms around the useless weapon.

  “Yeah, I know,” he laments. “Thanks for coming to my funeral, by the way.”

  “Of course, you were one of my best customers,” Katniss answers. “What am I saying? Is this some kind of Capitol trick? How are you here? Why are you here?”

  “It’s no trick, Sweetheart,” Haymitch explains. “The dead who isolated themselves during their lifetime are forced to roam the earth alone. My penance is to warn others before it’s too late. You don’t want to end up like me.”

  “I’m not alone,” Katniss squeaks. “I have my sister, and my mother… I have friends.”

  “Sure Katniss. You have them now, but you keep pushing them away. In time, your sister will marry and move away, and your mother will die. Then what will you have?”

  Katniss opens her mouth to answer, but Haymitch raises his transparent hand to stop her. 

  “Don’t bother with the excuses, Sweetheart. I know them all. This is my warning to you. You will be visited by three more spirits tonight. Heed my warning, Katniss. Change your life before it’s too late.”

[meepmoopfanfics]

you don’t get a win unless you’re playing the game: Daveed Diggs x Reader. Chapter 2.

Reminder: this is gonna be a long fic! please be patient :)

You are finally ending an excruciating first week of dance rehearsals.

You’re gearing up finishing Act I finally, your brain feeling completely fried from all of the material given, especially the vocal parts. You were so used to singing the melody line of all the songs and being given the alto part was a challenge in itself, let alone applying singing while doing the choreography. The dancing was second nature but you didn’t realize how much stamina you’d actually need to getting the notes out without sounding breathy, pitchy or exhausted. You did NOT want to embarrass yourself in front of the OBC when it came time to integrate.

You had only worked with the ensemble closely so far and were getting close with Stephanie, the universal dance captain of the show. She had mentioned to you that the principals and ensemble members would be having a little hang out session at her brother’s penthouse apartment downtown after rehearsals ended tonight.

“Brilliant work today everyone. I know it’s been tough. But take the weekend to really review the material and let everything sink in.” Stephanie’s eyes were lit up. The way she was so attentive to detail and every backstory of every movement was so inspiring and eye opening.

You wiped the sweat off of your face as you partner, aka M3, aka George Eaker, aka Cedric, gave you a wink and a thumbs up. You were way too lucky to be matched with Cedric. If you jumped across the stage, somehow you’d trust him to catch you with seconds to spare before landing.

The ensemble cheered together and began to pan out to the house to grab their things and head up to their dressing rooms to get ready for the party.

“Is everyone coming tonight?” Stephanie yelled excitedly.

You heard a cannon of yeses and hell yeahs around the group.

“The wolfpack’s coming too!” That was her nickname for the OBC crew. “It’s gonna be a raaaaaager!” She started gyrating her hips. Everyone erupted with laughter.

“A safe one at that, of course. Be on your best behavior around Lin… just kidding he’s an absolute child.

Alright now go, get out. Go get hot.”

You followed the ensemble up the stairs backstage to end up at your dressing room which you shared with W4, Michelle.

“Girl... what’re ya wearing tonight? I can’t decide.” Michelle asked while anxiously rummaging through her back full of scribbled on legal pads, muscle rollers, and random items of clothing.

You had packed your favorite black jeans that made your legs look flawless, your signature suede boots, and a Kith hoodie. You wanted to look put together but also casual and cool. Most importantly, you wanted to impress all of your idols. This was your only chance to give them the best first impression of you.

You thought about grabbing your Oakland sweatshirt that your parents got you as a gag gift for Christmas, in honor of your celebrity crush’s hometown. You immediately regretted even thinking of wearing it, as Daveed would definitely find it way too weird. You were from Massachusetts... not California. The Bay Area would be embarrassed for you.

“I just brought these little guys. All black, of course. Feel like it does the job. Also, the sweatshirt will let me eat alllllll of the pizza guilt free.”

Michelle stared longingly at your suede boots. “These are fuckin fancy!”

“They’re only Steve Madden!!” You were proud of your ability to find luxury looking goods for a cheap price. You don’t think that will ever change, even when you saw your first broadway check hit your checking account.

You were happy you could share a safe and fun dressing room space with Michelle and knew the two of you would become close friends.

You both ran into the shower room across the hallway, and quickly washed off. You decided you were going to straighten your long light brown hair. You loved your hair, but it got so curly and tangled when you sweat. Thankfully they were going to put you in a wig for the show instead of using your natural locks. Being a head sweat-er was the worst. Your makeup was minimal, as you looked best with a nice dewy makeup glow, with highlighted cheekbones. You wore a nude matte lipstick, which matched the natural color of your lips, and lightly liquid lined a cat eye over your big (insert eye color) eyes.

You saw your reflection. You didn’t know if it was the confidence of finally reaching your goal or if you just were having a good hair/makeup day... but you were stunning.

“Damn mama!” Michelle gasped as she saw your finished look. “Whose mans are you about to steal at this gig? Better not be Cedric, he’s mine.”

You laughed. You couldn’t help to think about who you already had your heart set on.

“Definitely not Cedric.”

Michelle opened her iPhone 11 plus and immediately opted for a mirror selfie. She quickly opened Instagram and posted it to her story.

You opened the app yourself to go check if it looked good.

Posted 32 secs ago

#MamaHam and #TheBullet hit the town 🎉

“Ready?” Michelle asked, putting the final touches of her gold Fenty highlight on her cheeks. “We should grab a quick bite before hitting the place. I plan on drinking my weight in Truly seltzers tonight.”

“Let’s get it.” You smiled. “I’ll call the uber.”

——

You called the uber, hopped in, and began driving downtown. You felt your anxiety creeping up on you.

“Trulys? Really? I’m gonna need to be doing shots of Jager in order to be able to speak a single word to any of these principals.”

“What are you... nervous? You already got the role. You’re equals with these guys.”

She wasn’t wrong.

“Guess I’ll just have to act as chill as possible. That’s the plan anyways... also Michelle, wanna know something ridiculous?”

“What?”

“I’ve had a middle school full fledged crush on Daveed since I can remember.”

She blurted out with laughter.

“Well girl he is on the market now. Shoot ya shot.”

You already knew this. Daveed was recently single and focusing on rebuilding himself up. His breakup with his last girlfriend wasn’t bad. It was mature and mutual. You knew he was taking time to himself, so you didn’t want to be overbearingly flirtatious when you first met him.

You also couldn’t stop thinking about your ex, whom you left last year around this time. His goals just weren’t lining up with your future. He hated musicals, he hated almost everything you liked... but you couldn’t stand the fact you shattered his heart.

“I’ll see what happens... after 5 shots.” You responded, winking at Michelle.

__

You arrived at the cutest little Italian place downtown in TriBeCa. You knew carbs and wine were the perfect pregame for this shindig.

After loads of pasta and splitting a bottle of wine, you began to feel the confidence needed to shake the nerves from you. You hit the bathroom to give yourself a double check before walking to your final destination.

—

As you walked up to the massive high rise residence, you couldn’t believe this was your lifestyle now. As you approached, you noticed an extremely familiar face exit the revolving door.

Holy shit, that’s Rafa.

Rafael Casal. Daveed Diggs’ best friend.

You stopped in your tracks stunned.

He turned his head immediately in your and Michelle’s direction.

“Y/N?! What’s going on?!”

“Shut up shut up shut up...” you whispered through your teeth. “Just keep walking.”

As he passed you both, he smiled, and turned into the Duane Reade on the corner. Probably picking up something he forgot.

You realized you would be on edge all night not being able to keep your cool. Rafa wasn’t even in the damn OBC and here you were, freaking out entirely on the freaking sidewalk.

Through the doors you went, passing the crystal clear marble floors, giant chandeliers, and up to the doorman.

“Can I help you beautiful ladies?”

Michelle blushed. The doorman was actually attractive.

“We’re here for Klemons? Penthouse 2?”

“Oh yeah! Hamilton!!! Love that show. Have fun!”

You hit the elevator as you looked down at your phone.

9:18pm

Perfect timing. Almost 20 mins late. Fashionably late, of course.

“Oh shit shit shit.”

You realized you haven’t changed your wallpaper from Daveed grabbing his crotch.

Michelle laughed as you fumbled to change your wallpaper to a pic of you and your family from when you were younger. Perfect. A conversation starter. Your overthinking was killing you softly.

Your teeth were legit chattering. You felt anxiety waves rush through your nervous system. The pit in your stomach grew. Your heart was beating a mile a minute. This was it. Your chance at something greater than you ever thought was possible to achieve.

The elevator doors opened to the open concept apartment. Voices were clashing over the blaring hip hop music in the dimly lit room. A full bar in the corner, Joe’s pizza scattered over the island in the kitchen. Beer pong set up on the dining room table.

There they were. Every single one of em. Scattered across the flat. Starstruck wasn’t even the beginning of what you felt.

Your eyes scanned quickly around.

There he was. Curly headed locks and all. Leaning up against the floor to ceiling windows that circled the place, holding a cocktail in his strong, large right hand accessorized with a few rings. Simply staring at the sights of the city. He looked like a million bucks and he was in a simple casual outfit. Light washed jeans, black boots, with his left hand in his black hoodie pocket.

Wait. You guys were wearing the same hoodie.

The same fucking hoodie.

Of course this would happen.

tag list:

@alexander-hamilhoe

[snarkwriteswrasslin]

21.12, trees and traditions, adam page

Title: trees and traditions

Theme: trees/decorating

Fandom / Character(s): Adam Page x Ivy, an OC of mine from a fic I keep abandoning.

Warnings: Bittersweet reunions, single mom au, awkward tension, fluff if you squint. Bad fluff, but fluff, all the same.

Word Count: my guesstimate is roughly around 1.6k 

So... I wrote this on a whim. It’s taken Adam Page and my original character Ivy, from that twice tried/twice abandoned fic that I still want to write so bad I can taste it, and it’s put... new things into play. And maybe.. if enough people like this... maybe I’ll be tempted to actually do something with this version, because to be honest, I liked this version better than the previous 2. This is my entry for the day for @champbucks​ 12 Days of Christmas challenge. 

Tagging:

@kyleoreillysknee​​​

@rampagewriting​​​

@writertoo18​​​

@thatnerdwriter​​​

@wrestlingismyguiltypleasure​​​

@chasingeverybreakingwave​​​

@waywardwrestlewritingwaif​​​

@sassymox​​​

@champbucks​​​

@hungmanhorsecarriage​​​

@wardl0w​​​

@ryantaylorgirl​​​

@dilfmoxley​​​

@hotyeehawman​​​

@gabbynorth98​​​

@bec0m​​​

@irish-newzealand-idian-dutch​​​

@daddyslittlevillain​​​

[ about page | masterlist | tag list ]

I knelt on the carpet in my new living-room, a big cardboard box in front of me, unwrapping ornaments. My son was passed out on the couch, surrounded by action figures. Nightmare Before Christmas was playing quietly for background noise because if I didn’t have some form of background noise, I’d be jumping at every little sound.

I’d just gotten out the tangled string of lights and started to work on untangling them when I heard a knock at the front door of the cabin. Right away, I tensed. My stomach tightened right up and every possible scenario I could imagine -and none of them particularly good, flew into my mind.

Before I realized what I was doing, I’d stood and my hand wrapped around the old wooden Louisville slugger that served as my only form of home protection for the time being as I cautiously made my way to the front door.

I let out a long and ragged breath when I saw Adam standing on the step, leaning against a thick wooden porch post.

After my heart finally climbed it’s way down out of my throat, I opened the door and peeked out. “Adam? My mom told me you were still on the road.”

He shrugged, stepping closer. He looked as if he wanted to hug me, but he wasn’t sure if doing it were a good idea or not. Just seeing him again after all this time though… Realizing just how much I’d truly missed the man. Among other things hanging around in the back of my mind at the moment.

I pressed against him, looping my arms around his neck, smiling up at him. The bat I’d been holding and totally forgotten about clattered to wooden floorboards noisily and from the open doorway, my son spoke up, rubbing his eyes sleepily. “Mama? You’re lettin all the heat out.”

“I’m sorry, sweetie.” I broke the hug with Adam reluctantly and turned, kneeling down in front of my son, smiling. I looked back over my shoulder at Adam, who was gaping and then back to my son, whose entire face lit up.

He raised a hand, pointing it at Adam. “I..He.. We just watched him on the tv earlier, mama!”

“We did, sweetheart. Can you do mom a favor?” I smiled at my son.

“What you want me to do, mama?”

“Go back inside. You’re barefoot and it’s freezing out, slugger and if you got sick, I…” I hugged my son tight and he laughed, trying to push me away as I licked the side of his face. “Ew, mama, don’t cow lick me!”

“I’m supposed to. That’s what mama cows do to their calves, champ.”I laughed as I watched my son step back in the door. But he snuck over to the window right beside it, I could see his little fingers on the plaid curtain panels.

I turned back to look at Adam. His hand was resting against the back of his head and finally, after a minute or two of his mouth opening and closing, he chuckled. 

“He’s a cute kid. Took after his mom, I see.”

I gulped. I forgot just how much Adam’s flirting affected me. And what a visceral effect it had always been. Or maybe it just had the punch it had now because I hadn’t seen him in so long and now, here he was.

Standing right in front of me, quite literally, the one who got away.

“Ivy, I.” Adam started to say something, but I raised my fingertip to his lip, pressing it against. I know him like I know the back of my hand, we grew up together. We were in love once. I still love him, even if I can’t have him. I knew he was about to apologize for that last night we were together, the huge fight we had after he proposed and I freaked out on him. And honestly, in the time that’s lapsed since, I’ve come to the realization that he has no reason to. I was the one who flipped out and then left town in a hurry.

“Adam, no. I’m the one who should be apologizing right now, okay? But when you started talking like that back then, I… I kinda panicked. We were kids and I was nowhere near ready to handle that level of commitment.

,, and yet, when you became ready, Ivy, you somehow managed to find the worst man possible to get involved with. What you should’ve done, and you know it, is come back here. Settled down with Adam. Stopped trying so hard to escape this little town and embraced it, because really, was it any better out there? No.” my mind was tormenting. I tried to put the thought out and flashing him a gentle smile, I stepped out of the doorway, turning the knob to open the door. I thought if I turned away from him, just for a second, I could pull myself together.

“Listen, Adam. It’s freezing out here and I have a tree to decorate. So, if you want to catch up? I think we should move it inside.” I gave a soft laugh. Every part of me thought that he’d offer up an excuse and leave in a hurry. I didn’t expect him to want to hang around, but it didn’t stop me from wanting him to. From hoping against hope that he’d hang around, even if only for a little while.

Adam eyed the door and swallowed hard as his eyes fixed on me again. My eyes caught on the subtle bob of his throat as he did so, followed by the way his tongue trailed over his lips and I took a shaky breath. When he went to step into my grandma’s cabin, our bodies brushed just barely, and for the most fleeting of seconds. And everything came rushing right back, all over again.

How could I have ever been so stupid to just leave. Adam offered me the world on a silver platter and like an idiot, I ran. I had to know if the world was better. I had the whole world the whole time and I realized it way too late.

His hand lingered at my waist. An old habit. One I really missed. I swallowed hard, my eyes drifting up, meeting his as I did my best to put on my best friendly and neutral smile, despite the plethora of emotions that were fighting to the surface.

,, you’re not in the right place right now, Ivy. Not at all.” my brain weighed in on the situation at hand. I pushed any and all thought or emotion I may have been feeling out of my head for the moment. We stepped into the living room of the cabin and Adam let out a low, approving whistle at the Christmas tree tucked in the spot by the window and near the fireplace.

Just like Grams always did every single year.

“How’d you get that tree in here, hon?” Adam’s voice shattered through my thoughts and I glanced up from the box of ornaments I’d been hovering over because I’d seen an envelope sitting towards one side.

I straightened, wiping my hands on my favorite pair of jeans and shrugged. “Dragged it, mostly. It wasn’t that heavy.”

Adam nodded, going quiet again. He reached out, taking an ornament from the box on the coffee table between us and as he put it on the tree, he asked, “So is this.. Is it permanent, I mean.. My dad, he said somethin about a movin truck being parked up here for about two nights. Didn’t know you were the one who bought the place.”

I dragged my fingers through my hair and eyed the tree, glancing down briefly at the heavily glittered star shaped piece of construction paper in my hand and I cleared my throat, getting my son’s attention. “Hey, champ. This is your ornament, bud. Hang it wherever you want it to go.”

“Okay, but I made it for th’ top, mama.”

I’d been about to lift him up, despite my reach not being much of a difference, but Adam bent down, hefting my laughing son up onto his shoulders and then he stood up, letting my son place the ornament just below the very top of the tree, where the topper my grandma always used was going to go.

He was smiling as he stood my son safely back on his feet and for just a minute or two, my mind actually went there. I actually pictured how things might have been if I’d listened to my heart all along instead of being stubborn. 

I’d always thought Adam would make an amazing dad one day.

My son hugged his legs and then asked me if I was ready for the popcorn we made to make a popcorn garland earlier and I smiled, nodding. I called out to him as he disappeared into the next room, “Don’t you eat all that popcorn, Dean!”

“Aw, mama! Just a few pieces!”

“You heard me, little man.” I gave him that firm look and he nodded, disappearing completely into the kitchen. 

It left Adam and I alone all over again. And I realized that I had yet to answer the question he asked a few minutes ago. The tension in the air around us was so thick I almost couldn’t breathe and at this point, I’d have given anything to alleviate it.

“To answer your question… The move is permanent. There’s only so much I can take…” I trailed off. It wasn’t fair to dump out my problems on him. I wasn’t going to do that. I was the one who got myself into the mess I was in right now. I needed to be the one to get myself out and so far, so good. Things already felt a thousand times better.

I felt more at peace since I’d taken my mom up on the offer of moving into Gram’s cabin than I’d felt in years. 

Adam eyed me, concern filling baby blue eyes. But he didn’t ask anything. He nodded in understanding. We reached for another ornament, the same one, and our fingers brushed together clumsily. We stared at each other a second or two, with Adam pulling his hand away first and mumbling an apology before turning away quickly, busying himself with placing the ornaments in his hand on the tree.

I cleared my throat. “If you were going to ask, I’m fine. Better now, actually.”

He turned around and our bodies brushed just slightly all over again. His hands went to my elbows as if he were going to steady me and he gazed down at me as if there were a million things he wanted to say, but he didn’t even know where to start. And I felt the same. Seeing him again was both a comfort and a torture.

A comfort because instinctively, I knew I was home. I was safe and the crap of more recent years was about to be over and behind me.

Torture, because I was now confronted with everything I never even knew I wanted.

“You’re sure, right? He didn’t… hurt you or anythin’?”

I sighed and shrugged. “I signed myself up for it.” my gaze dropped down to the box of ornaments and apparently, he wasn’t having it. His fingers tucked beneath my chin and he made me look him in the eyes.

“You didn’t ask for anythin’ he did. None of it’s your fault, okay? I don’t care what happened. It ain’t my business. But I know you, Ivy. And I care.” he went quiet and I bit my lip, mulling over what he said. Seeing him get stirred up like he just had on my behalf only reminded me just how loyal he’d been. Just how much he protected me.

,, and just how for granted you took that.” the thought finished itself in my mind and I took a deep breath or two. “Thank you.”

I went quiet after saying it, because there was so much more I wanted to say, but I wasn’t in the shape to say it right now. Adam shrugged, flashing me that lopsided grin. Trying to lighten the mood.

“I mean it, Ivy.. If you two need anything, I’m right down the road, darlin.” he spoke up again for a few seconds and I nodded, smiling. I know I won’t ask for help unless I absolutely have to, but I know Adam wouldn’t be the amazing man he is if he didn’t offer. And I knew he meant it too.

“I forgot how well we worked together.” I blurted it out as we were finishing up with the last of the ornaments on the tree. My son slunk in, flopping down on the couch with the bowl of popcorn and the string and I flopped down next to him, nodding to the empty spot on the other side of the old plaid couch so Adam would sit.

Adam smiled and sank down, talking to my son. “Whatcha got there?”

“Mama said we’re gonna put all this on th’ tree, sir.”

Adam cringed a little, but he didn’t discourage my son from using the polite term. I smiled at him over my son’s head and he smiled back. I found myself wondering if maybe he weren’t thinking back to shared family Christmases between our families.

The way we were the ones who always opted to do this. The way in later years, we’d always retreat to the living room and turn on It’s A Wonderful Life, snuggle up on my grandma’s couch with the bowl on the table in front of us as we strung popcorn for the tree and tossed kernels into each other’s mouths.

“Your mama n me.. We used to do this when we were little.” Adam chuckled, catching my gaze. Giving me this fond and soft little smile. I smiled back and nodded, reaching for a handful of popcorn. “We weren’t as good as you were though, champ. Because when Adam and I were doing this, we usually ate most of the popcorn before we ever got around to stringing it.”

“We did not!”

“We did, Adam.”

“Your mama did.” Adam teased, giving me a wink. I gave him a playful pout and when my son was caught up in stringing a few kernels onto the string for the garland, I took a kernel or two from the bowl and lazily tossed them at Adam, who opened his mouth, snapping it closed as soon as he’d caught the piece or two that I’d thrown.

I couldn’t help the laugh and the smile that came. Or the thought that followed which I promptly tried to push down deep.

,, Maybe Adam showing up tonight and helping you with the tree is a sign, Ivy… Things don’t have to be over. There’s always just a shred of hope. Christmas is the time for miracles, after all...”

[candyqueenblog]

First Lines Tag Game

I was tagged by @worse0mens and @supergeek21 for this game where you post the first line or so from 20 of your most recent writings and then tag 10 more of your favorite writers. To be tagged is an honor and a delight and I would be remiss if I DIDN’T play too because this sounds like oodles and kit and kaboodles of fun! 🤩 (Please note, some of the fics/writing on her is rated E, so if you’re a youngin’ - GIT! And anyone who knows me IRL, please don’t ever bring it up ;     ; ) Placed below cut because it got LONG lol (Self-reblogging because I am dummy and forgot to add tags 😅)

1. Bea L. Zebub (or just “Beelzebub” to her unfortunate employees) was dead. (A Christmas Omen)

2.  The bookshop doors slammed open hard enough to crack the spot where the knob met the wall.  Crowley stormed into the building, his amber eyes flashing dangerously behind his round, dark lenses. (Flames of Anger and Hellfire)

3. Crowley couldn’t help but wonder… ‘Why was it always apples?’ (The Taste of Apples)

(Note: #3 was a collab with @vivi-theakuneko for a zine. She handled the art, I handled the writing!)

4. Aziraphale had been looking for this book for centuries. (Ivdkuranavyja)

(Note: #4 was a collab with @crowleymowley for a zine. There’s some cool art in THIS one too! 👀)

5. Physicists, scientists, and philosophers have grappled with the theory of infinite, alternate universes ever since psychologist William James coined the term in 1895. Though the context of the word was different for James than it is now, current theory posits that there are an infinite number of alternate realities out there and, together, they make up the totality of existence in a great cosmic pile called the multiverse. (Universe A and B)

6.  Hi my name is Anthony Janthony Ashtoreth Fire Crowley and I have long fiery red hair (that’s how I got my name) with black streaks and purple tips that reaches my mid-back and snakey yellow eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like David Tenant (AN: if u don’t know who he is get da hell out of here!). (My Ineffable)

7. “To my sister!” Gabriel cheered, lifting a flute of champagne in a toast. The woman in question, Zira Fell, raised her own flute in answer with a face-splitting grin. (Saltwater on Skin - Wives Edition)

8. It was raining the day Azira reunited with Crowley. (Awaken Their Ashes Unto Pain)

(Note: The line from #8 is TECHNICALLY in the SECOND chapter, but this fic is a collab with @new-endings and she wrote the first chapter, while I wrote the second and we are alternating between the two)

9. “To my brother!” Gabriel cheered, lifting a flute of champagne in a toast. The man in question, Ezra Fell, raised his own flute in answer with a face-splitting grin. (Saltwater on Skin)

(Note: #9 is the exact same story as #7, just the genders changed)

10.  Ezra had awoken several times throughout the night, convinced that he was going to miss his family’s departure if he didn’t go to the beach right now! (Sharing Three Kisses)

(Note: #10 is a story divergence of #9)

11. Raphael closed the door of A.Z. Fell & Co behind him with a soft click as he stepped out onto the streets of Soho. He folded his hands in front of his stomach and rocked back and forth on his heels. “Well. That was awkward,” he said to himself. (To Build a Future on Earth)

12.  The early August heat hung heavy in the air, and the apple tree he sat beneath was laden with unripened fruits.  The tart, green apples wouldn’t be ready until early October, but their scent was still carried on every puff of warm breeze and every passing cloud that promised rain for the afternoon. (The Prince and the Serpent)

13. At 26 years old, Aziraphale Fell (if both his parents weren’t already dead, he’d have strangled them himself for giving him such a moniker) was one of the youngest self-made millionaires in history.  (Ruin and Rebuilding)

14. Prince Anthony Centary was many things: a lover of fast carriages, younger half-brother to Lord Beatrus, and purveyor of fine clothes. He was also a four-foot red-bellied serpent currently snagged under a rose bush. (Gardens, Snakes, and Kisses)

(Note: #14 was written as a contest entry some time ago for @berrytera’s Cursed Prince AU)

15.  Up until the moment he died, Captain Medina would never be able to tell what it was that had convinced him to visit the island early. (3 Hours Earlier)

16.  William straightened the lapels of his uniform as he climbed out of his car and marched up the long, winding walkway to the manor of Thaddeus Dowling, Ambassador. (A Case of Mistaken Identity)

(Note: #16 was a commission from @queerspacewhale, and its prequel is in the works. I promise, friend! It ended up being a bit more in-depth than originally planned lol)

17.  His siblings were all hobbits of good moral standing, as is expected of living in a place called “Hobbiton”. (Dragonfire)

(Note: #17 was a commission from @fanlan1! I’d never really written crossover fics before this point, so this was a fun experience!)

18. “5... 4... 3... 2... 1... HAPPY NEW YEAR!” “Wahoo...” (A Treatise on Pinnipeds)

19. Crowley was staring at him with a predatory look, but was curled up in the corner with his back to the wall. (Instincts)

20. Ezra stood back and admired his handiwork. (Surprise)

Patterns: I think mine tend to start out fairly mild, or they come out of NOWHERE like a slap to the face. No in between lol

Favorite: #5, simply because it sounds super-smart! :D

(Feel free to skip over if you want when I tag you ^^) @new-endings, @wyvernquill, @unproblematicme, @mordellestories, @caedmonfaith, @scrapheapchallenge, @summerofspock, @holycatsandrabbits, and @nohaijiachi 

[darlingsdevil]

The Ballads of Rebirth (Arthur Morgan x Reader)

Chapter 17: Epilogue

Masterlist

Tag list: @rollyjogerjones

A/N: This is it. This is the end. I wrote a little message for all of you to read, it would mean a lot if you did.

When I began this story a few days after Christmas, I wrote it on a whim. The story brewed in my mind for perhaps a max week before I began writing it. The original idea was inspired a lot by Big Fish the Musical, the musical I was in, in early December. I remember I used to write day after day and could get a chapter up daily, until around the sixth or seventh chapter. I can’t quite tell you how I did it, but I know if I hadn’t gotten that far so quickly, I would have never finished this story, it would have been added to my never ending pile of unfinished WIP’s. The Ballads of Rebirth was supposed to go in an entirely different direction that I had planned, Lee and Arthur’s feud was supposed to be way worse and bitter, and would have ended up with Arthur beating up Lee. Lee was supposed to be much more of an antagonist in the final chapters, a way worse of a person, but I couldn’t do it to him. In many ways, he was flawed, he was selfish at times and quick to judge, but he was still loving and goofy. I know people were not going to like him, they were rooting for Arthur after all. But I still love Lee, he was my first official rdr2 oc, my first fully fleshed out character. Quite frankly, I didn’t really ‘know’ who he was until I continued writing it, I had no personality built out for him until I began writing, and I just chose what felt right. That’s what happens with a lot of my stories, I write what feels right (which usually leads to plot holes because I don’t write shit down). But regardless, I love Lee, and I hope you’re satisfied with the ending I gave him.

There were a few times that I thought about giving up, that my story was absolute shit, that my plot holes were too confusing and my narrative was weak, and I was close to quitting. Until people began asking me when the new chapters would be out, what would happen next. While the numbers may be small, the dedication is what kept me going. And yeah, maybe my story isn’t the biggest rdr2 fic, maybe it’s not talked about in discord servers, but I don’t care, all that matters is that the fans that have stayed have shown me that I should continue writing, that there are people rooting for this story. I know, my story is full of plot holes, I know people don’t like Lee (which I’ll forever be bitter about), I know my story has grammatical errors, I know maybe I shouldn’t have killed off Mahala, I know there’s a lot I could have done, but there’s a lot I still did. As much as I think my story is weak, I’m still proud of the fact that I made it, that it is my own, that I created it and stuck through.

Sometimes, it’s not about what you could have done, it’s what you did. And that’s more valuable in many ways. Creating anything is powerful, and The Ballads of Rebirth taught me that.

So thank you, to every commentator, every person who left a like or kudo, every person who left an ask in my inbox, and especially everyone who complimented my writing style (which is apparently unique? and also these comments are a huge ego boost to me so if I’m cocky, it’s those peoples fault). Thank you for sticking with me, and I hope you enjoyed what I made.

I know I did.

••

Here Are Some Songs That Inspired This Story

1. Setting Sun - Lord Huron (Main inspiration)

2. Prologue - Starry (What I consider to be the main theme)

3. Sunlight and Storms - Starry (Inspiration for Lee and Reader’s relationship)

4. The Road - Starry (yeah.. I know there’s lots of Starry, but regardless, Arthur’s arc inspiration)

5. After The War - Stars (wow lots of star-esque things, Epilogue inspiration, I recommend listening to it while reading this)

•••

PS. The AU ending will be posted with the main story, as I realized many of you may not see it otherwise.

•••

Time passed quickly and solemnly. Life was peaceful and quiet. And you loved every second of it. After you and Arthur had left Richfield in search of the life you had lost, you and your husband had found it with Charles, in a small cottage down the road from him. Charles was happy to see you and Arthur returned to him.

And life was quiet, for a long time it was. You heard nothing of Micah and Dutch, the Pinkerton’s had stopped searching, it seemed the outlaw way had died out long ago too. You were scared Arthur or you would somehow slip back into it. you would blink and suddenly be pulled back into the life you so desperately tried to avoid, but the pull never came. The older you got, the lesser and lesser that percentage became.

The people of Wapiti had long since moved. You visited Mahala’s grave frequently, and thanked her for bringing Arthur back to you. You were sure you would have liked her.

You thanked Charles too, for being quick to find him. It was strange to think that without Charles’ swift action, Arthur would not be here today. Instead, you would be visiting his grave instead of Mahala’s.

John was exceptionally pleased to hear Arthur was still alive. Abigail wrote frequently to you for many years, you missed her dearly, but you had faith you would be reunited once more.

“Honey?” You called out to the doorway behind you.

“G’morning. I got what you asked me to pick up,” Arthur replied. You looked over your shoulder and smiled at him. He placed the box down at the table.

“Thank you. Breakfast is almost ready,” You said, scrambling some eggs on top of the stove. Arthur came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist.

“Someone’s touchy today,” You laughed, shaking your head.

“Missed you.” He nuzzled his face into your neck.

“You were gone for a day.”

“I’m not allowed to miss my dear wife?” He pretended to sound hurt.

“Not when you’re distracting me,” You replied nonchalantly, continuing to prepare the omelettes.

Arthur laughed heartily in your ear. “I give up then,” he said, removing his hold from your waist and putting his hands up in defeat.

“It’s almost ready, sit down.” You put the finishing touches on the omelettes and put them on plates. Arthur sat down at the small table while you fetched some forks. You stared through the window while your hands grabbed two forks, seeing the daffodils on the window, Arthur had bought for you a few days earlier.

You walked over to the table and set down the two plates, taking a seat across from Arthur. He grabbed at the plate hungrily and began to eat.

“You sure are hungry.”

“Starvin’. Been a day since I’ve had your lovely cooking,” Arthur smiled at you. You picked up your fork as well and began to eat.

“I forgot the coffee, hold on.” You realized after a few moments and walked over to the countertop to fetch the pot of coffee, pouring two cups for Arthur and you. You made yours how you liked it, and brought cream and sugar over to Arthur.

“Thank you,” He replied to the gesture, grabbing his cup. He put in a few spoonfuls of sugar and some cream, always the one with the sweet tooth.

You sipped your coffee while you ate your breakfast, glancing out towards the front windows. It was a nice day out, clear of clouds with a nice breeze. The garden still needed tending to, but at least later you could sit on the porch with Arthur.

“I invited Charles over for dinner tonight, by the way. I’m making roast beef and potatoes, and maybe an apple pie, I haven’t decided yet,” You shrugged.

“Make blueberry.” Arthur replied, picking up a newspaper from yesterday that was on the table.

“Blueberries aren’t in season.”

“Okay, then raspberry.”

“Not in season either.”

“Really? Well shit. Apple will have to do then.”

“You don’t like my apple pies?”

“What? No, I do! You just make them a lot. I feel like we’re having them every week,” Arthur laughed nervously.

You pretended to glare at him, “Then I’ll never make another apple pie again. You’re getting pie with no filling in all of them now.”

“Now I didn’t say that! I’m just saying, you make apple pies a lot, I like variety sometimes.”

“You lived with the gang for 20 years and ate the same stew for every meal but you’re complaining about me making apple pie once a week?” You raised your eyebrow at him.

“That’s why I like variety now. Couldn’t have it for so long, that once I get it I’ll never go back to eating the same thing.”

“Mhm.” You dragged out the sound, nodding sarcastically.

You stared at Arthur, he stared at you, a slight smile on his lips. “Just admit you don’t like my apple pies.”

“Would it make you happy if I said that?”

“No. Yes. Maybe. I don’t know!”

“Listen, I like your apple pies, honestly. I just like some variety, that’s all,” He said, attempting to quell your fake anger.

“I’m never making an apple pie ever again,” You replied dramatically, slumping onto the table, reaching your hands out to hold his.

Arthur chucked at your dramatics.

“Just eat your omelette.”

•••

You thought of Lee frequently. Not that you yearned for him, or missed him, you simply wondered how he was doing. And in a way, he had heard your thoughts, after about two years of silence from him, Lee sent a letter.

“You have a letter,” Arthur had said one night when he came back from town, placing the letter on the table in front of you.

“Who’s it from?”

“Lee.”

“Lee sent me a letter?” You asked in disbelief, grabbing the envelope and examining the name on the front. Leroy Rinascita. Clear as day.

(Y/N),

It’s been quite some time since you left Richfield. I hope this letter finds you well. I took a chance and sent a letter to Valentine, a city Arthur had mentioned to me before, so if I don’t hear from you, I assume you’re somewhere else off in the country.

I hope you’re pleased with the choices you made. How is Arthur, by the way? I know we started off on the wrong foot (for good reason) but overall I found him to be a good, kind man. I can tell Arthur makes a good husband. I pray he’s not too angry with how I acted earlier towards him, water under the bridge, right?

I apologize for not sending a letter sooner, or perhaps I’m sorry for even writing this, in case you find this letter strange. I just wanted to know how you are doing. I’m doing well too. I’ve found someone as well who I enjoy very much, they live with me now. I guess you can say we got married, about two months ago actually. It wasn’t a conventional marriage of course. You actually already met them. I’m not sure you would expect who, but for the sake of prying eyes, I won’t reveal who they are in this letter. Other than marriage, life’s been pretty normal. The general store is doing well, there’s some new projects in the city too. A new candy store opened by the pier after the old one unfortunately burned down a few months after you had left. Richfield is bigger now, I feel like it’ll never stop growing. More and more people show up everyday. I barely even know the neighbors names these days.

As for my father, I’m pleased to say he’s still kicking. Somehow, the cancer went away, I couldn’t tell you how, the doctors can’t either. I’m really grateful for you convincing him to stay alive, to stay for me.

Your locket is still with me, I found an old family photo of my father, my mother and Anastasia as a newborn. It was strange to see my mother’s face after so many years, I had nearly forgotten it. I have an older photo of Anastasia too on the other side, my partner isn’t in the locket, only because I see them daily. I don’t need to be reminded that I love them.

But enough talk of me, how are you doing? I know it’s been a while, but I still care about you, and hope to know you’re doing well. Give Arthur a hello for me as well.

Regards,

Lee

You were happy to know Lee still cared, in some horrible nightmare you imagined that he despised you, that you were simply a dark phase in his life. And you were even happier that Lee had found someone and was truly living the life he had wanted. In a way, you were the same as him, both yearning for peace and quiet.

“Lee’s been doing well. I’m glad he sent this letter, he says hello to you, Arthur,” You told him, setting the letter down on the table.

“Good. I’m glad Lee’s doing okay.”

“Yeah, me too.”

•••

Even though Beecher’s Hope had many people living off its land, it did not feel crowded. Perhaps it was the sky that made it feel that way, the sky was endless, and when you and your family worked underneath it, it did not feel so small. The sky was infinite.

“Jack, will you go get Anne for me? She’s out by the chicken coop,” You had told the teenager.

“Sure thing, Aunt (Y/N),” He replied, walking towards the front door to fetch Anne for dinner. Although the Marston and Morgan houses were separate, the two families had practically lived in both. Jack was eating over for dinner, John and Abigail claiming you as his babysitter. Not that he needed one — or perhaps Uncle did.

“Arthur? Will you set the table for me, please? I have to go get Anne washed up once Jack brings her in,” You called out to Arthur behind you.

“Sure.” Arthur responded, he picked up the dishes next to you and began placing them on the table.

As you finished up cooking, you heard the shrill voice of Anne calling out to you. You immediately swiveled around as her tiny legs bounced up to you.

“There’s my little one!” You said joyously, she wrapped her arms around your leg and giggled. She was a near carbon copy of Arthur. She had his nose, his eyes, his mouth shape, but she had your hair and complexion. Regardless of who she looked more like — she was yours.

“Mama! I brought you a feather from the chicken coop!” She reached into her tiny dress pocket and pulled out a white feather. It was bigger and heavier than a chicken feather, you wondered what type of bird it was.

“Sorry, Uncle Arthur, she kind of made a mess in the chicken coop,” You heard Jack say to Arthur.

“You did? Oh thank you, sweetie.” You beamed at her, she watched you take it with big proud eyes. You placed the feather in your pocket, it’s long feathers sticking out.

“You’re welcome, mama.” You noticed the dirt on her face and on her knees as she said that. You scooped her up in your arms and took her into the bathroom to wash up.

You set her down next to the sink and began washing her knees with a wet washcloth.

“Mommy?”

“Yes?” You hummed, continuing to scrub the dirt off her knees.

“When is the baby coming?”

“Not for a couple more months.”

“Daddy thinks it’ll be a boy,” She told you matter of factly.

“Daddy thinks lots of things.”

“He told me he’s sure about this one.”

“When did daddy say that?” You asked, dipping the washcloth under the water, beginning to wipe the dirt off her cute face.

“Today. He told me while we were looking for flowers for you.”

“Okay, well, what else did he say?”

“He said he wants to name the baby Henry Hosea.”

You blinked at the name. Henry Hosea did sound nice. After all, Hosea was technically your adoptive father, as well as Arthur’s. Neither of you had really ever brought him up, avoiding that painful topic entirely. And Anne knew nothing of your past occupations, it was a story for another time, when she was older.

“I like the name Hosea,” Anne responded after being met by your silence.

“It’s a nice name,” Your voice nearly breaking. You subdued the tears in your eyes, after all that conversation was for another time.

When you finished cleaning Anne up, you brought her to dinner and sat her down next to Jack. You brought the food out to the table, making sure to put the apple pie right in front of Arthur.

•••

In many ways, time had been kind to you. It had been patient and nurturing, time allowed you a second chance at life.

It had given you the life you had wanted, one full of peace, love and family. Your life was quiet at Beecher’s Hope, filled with no revenge story. Time had dragged out your lesson for many years, but now you were reaping the fruits of your labor.

So now, as you cradle your newborn son, watching Anne and Arthur play in the field, her giggles dancing over the grass. You thank time for being there for you. For giving you what you wanted, for letting you learn to grow. For giving you a family. For returning Arthur to you.

In many ways you were thankful, thankful for the lessons you had learned, thankful for the house you lived in, thankful for the food on your table. Thankful for Mahala, thankful for Lee, thankful for Anne, thankful for Arthur and thankful for your son, Henry Hosea.

A cool breeze swept over the field, causing the grass and flowers to dance in the wind. Anne began to pretend she was a bird and Arthur raced around trying to catch her, both laughing in unison.

You looked down at your newborn son, his eyes closed over his resting face.

“One day I’ll tell you where your name comes from. I’ll tell you all about the life your daddy and I lived. And I’ll tell you about the life I had after that, and I’ll tell you about why I’ll never go back to either. One day I’ll tell you all about it,” You said quietly to your son, a promise to him and time, and no one else.

And in the end there was a man and a woman, and a daughter and a son, living to the world, thankful for every moment they get to spend with each other.

And Mother Nature rejoiced, for the man on the mountain and the woman in the city had found each other.

••• The End •••

[dying-suffering-french-stalkers]

wendy’s great big pirates of the caribbean fic rec list

Hello, friends!  I’ve been meaning to make a Pirates fic rec list for years and the day has finally come.  This list is obviously in no way exhaustive and is very much indicative of my personal biases (*cough* lots of Norrington *cough*), but I can heartily recommend every fic that made this list and I hope you all enjoy it.  Making this was a labor of love and I would be thrilled to hear your thoughts on any you choose to read (though you should leave a kind comment for the author first)!

Other notes: I collected the bulk of these years ago, so there are a lot on FFnet and I have tried my best to screen them for various content warnings.  I believe only two fics on this list are explicit and are marked as such.  There is precious little slash on this list since that’s just not what I tended to read at the height of my Pirates phase; my apologies.

Under a cut to spare your dashes from this monster of a post.

“Mutiny on the Dauntless” by Marnie - Governor Swann and Lieutenant Norrington narrowly skirt disaster at the hands of a ruthless captain and dangerous crew on the crossing from England. [19k words. No ships. Warnings: seasickness, battle violence, minor character death, semi-graphic naval discipline.]

THE HONORAT COLLECTION in (hopefully) chronological order.  This author is my uncontested favorite Pirates of the Caribbean fic writer and I’m forever grateful to them.  Here’s to you, @honorat!

“Here’s Luck To You” - A collection of drabbles about Jack and Bootstrap Bill’s friendship, written in late 2005. [6k. Mind any posted warnings.]

“Homecoming” - Author’s summary: The young Captain Norrington has a rare moment alone with his beloved ship.  [1k.  No ships but the sailing kind.  No warnings.]

“Daring Rescue, Daring Escape” - A narration of Elizabeth's rescue following her tumble off the battlement and of Jack's attempted escape afterward.  [7k.  Can be read as Sparrabeth.  No warnings.]

“Worthy of His Steel” - Picks up where DR,DE left off, then flashes back to Will’s apprenticeship with Mr. Brown.  [44k.  Light Willabeth.  Mind any warnings: I remember minor character death, alcoholism, and general angst.]

“A Bargain At Any Price” - Elizabeth reflects on James’ interrupted marriage proposal.  [968 words.  Unrequited Norribeth.  No warnings.]

“Marooned” - A movie novelization of the time Jack and Elizabeth spent on Rumrunner’s Isle.  (If you haven’t seen the deleted scenes from CotBP, they’re now required viewing: Part 1, Part 2.)  [28k.  Can be read as Sparrabeth.  Warnings: alcohol; discussion of past injuries including burns, a brand, and a gunshot; discussion of death, murder, and suicide (latter related only to marooning and not seriously entertained or acted upon); mind any others.]

“Aboard the Dauntless” - Takes place directly after Marooned.  More movie/deleted scene novelization.  [20k.  Can be read as Sparrabeth and/or (unrequited) Norribeth.  Mind any warnings.]

“No Mercy” - Set aboard the Dauntless just after the battle at Isla de Muerta.  Have you ever been unreasonably hecked up by the sailor who rang the bell when he spotted zombie pirates?  I have because I’m Like That but now you can be too!  [1k.  No ships.  Warnings: blood, minor character death, funeral, survivor’s guilt, mention of execution by hanging.]

“For Remembrance” - Elizabeth visits Jack in prison the day before his pending execution.  [2k.  Can be read as Sparrabeth.  Warnings: brief mention of unsanitary prison conditions; death tokens; discussion of death, murder, and execution by hanging.]

“Balance of Justice” - The same night, Norrington struggles with the idea of Jack’s pending execution.  [990 words.  No ships.  Warnings: mentioned minor character death, survivor’s guilt, discussion of execution by hanging.]

“Crossing the Bar” - My all-time favorite PotC fanfic.  After the events of CotBP, Norrington thinks he has Jack cornered, but the pirate has other ideas.  A story of truly literary proportions ensues. [156k.  Canon divergent: written pre-DMC.  Light Jack/Anamaria.  Warnings: battle injuries, period-accurate first aid, minor character death. Other warnings posted in fic.]

“Just Between Us Dying Gods” -  Jack’s POV, takes place on the island of the Pelegostos just prior to Will's arrival.  [1k.  No ships.  Warnings: cannibalism, canon-typical ethnocentrism.]

“Bits of Shine” - A collection of drabbles (in the classic 100-word sense) spanning Pirates 1-3.  [14k.  Assorted canon ships.  Mind any posted warnings.]

“Christmas Reunion” - Author’s description: A Christmas reunion of several beloved characters set post-AWE. Jack's POV. Entirely fluffy.  [2k.  Willabeth.  No warnings.]

SCRUFFINGTON ANGST - Me, aged 15: but sir that’s my emotional support Good-ish Man Brought Low By Hubris (who am I kidding, that hasn’t changed a bit).  As you would expect, general warnings for this section might include minor character death, survivor’s guilt, self-hatred, alcohol abuse, unsanitary conditions, etc.  If you love Tortuga-related angst, this section is for you!  If you don’t go for whump and other unpleasant things, scroll on.

“Seven Deadly Sins: James Norrington” by Edoraslass - Classic drabble format, exactly what it says on the bottle.  Follows James’ DMC arc beginning in Tortuga.  [711 words.  No ships.  See tags on AO3.]

“Three Days” by geekmama - Several scene narrations following James from the pig sty to Isla Cruces.  Smelly bastard man.  [1k.  Several unrequited ships.  Warnings: unsanitary, alcohol abuse.]

“Interregnum: Icarus” by ConcertiGrossi - Follows James all the way from the hurricane to Tortuga, with an epilogue just after delivering the Heart to Beckett.  I dislike headcanons about Norrington ever employing sex workers - it seems very out-of-character to me - but other than that I stand by this fic.  Angst alert.   [16k.  Canon-divergent only if you read Sins of the Father.  Referenced unrequited Norribeth.  Warnings: near-drowning, vomit, mass minor character death, implied (but ultimately untrue) medium character death, funerals, survivor’s guilt, self-hatred, unsanitary, coughing, nightmares, pregnancy mention, parental death, under-eating, alcohol abuse, referenced suicide, suicidal ideation.]

“Birthday Wishes” by YouCantGetThereFromHere - A one-shot AU in which James has a twin brother and they celebrate their thirtieth birthdays, one in England, the other in Tortuga.  [4k.  Referenced OCxOC ship in the first half.  Warnings: alcohol abuse, self-hatred.]

“Eye of the Storm” by Edoraslass - Tortuga barmaid Kate is intrigued by the island’s newest barfly and strikes up a sort of friendship with Norrington until he moves on.  [4k.  No ships.  See tags on AO3.]

“Oil and Wine” by Argyle - Norrington’s descent during his time on Tortuga.  Everything comes with a price and a familiar face dogs his steps.  [500 words.  Norribeth.  See tags on AO3.]

“Absence and Memory” by Meddow - Post-CotBP, Elizabeth reflects on her relationship with Norrington over the years.  [3.7k.  Norribeth.  No warnings.]

“Penance More Will Do” by Meddow - Set directly after the hurricane.  While a wounded James is adrift at sea, he is visited by Hector Barbossa, who gives him a choice on behalf of Calypso.  [5.7k.  No ships.  Warnings: blood, vomit.]

“A Song for the Wretched and the Wrecked” by jadeddiva - Post-CotBP AU in which Will runs off to sea and Elizabeth consents to marry James after all.  They have a lot of growing to do, but it ends well.  [6.5k.  Norribeth.  No warnings.]

“Jack Sparrow’s Black Pearl” by Zath_Chauvert - A filk song in which Elizabeth and Will discuss Jack to the tune of “Tango: Maureen”.  [468 words.  Willabeth, J/W/E if you’re not a coward.  No warnings.]

“Of How a Lieutenant died at Sea” by YouCantGetThereFromHere - Foregoing the ending he's given in OST, Lt. Theodore Groves instead dies in the wreckage of the Endeavour in AWE and briefly greets Will in the afterlife.  [703 words.  No ships.  Warnings: implied major character death.]

THE ERINYA COLLECTION (I forgot that I saved a ton from this author as well!  Not arranged in any particular order.)

“Curiosity” - Elizabeth reflects on her growing feelings for Jack during DMC.  [828 words.  Sparrabeth.  Warnings: alcohol.]

“Sacrifice” - More Sparrabeth UST, Elizabeth’s POV.  [527 words.  Sparrabeth.  No warnings.]

“One Shot” - A collection of PotC drabbles, all written pre-AWE.  [6k.  Various pairings.  Warnings posted in fic.]

“The Game” - Jack and Tia Dalma play cards.  [600 words.  Can be read as Jack/Tia Dalma.  No warnings.]

“Frayed” - Will and Elizabeth, post-DMC, semi-compliant with AWE, but angstier.  I’m afraid this one isn’t very kind to Will but it sets up this author’s character dynamics/reasons for Sparrabeth.  [1k.  Willabeth, implied Sparrabeth.  Warnings: very poor communication.]

“Something Rich and Strange” - A Will/Tia Dalma one-shot, of all things.  A touch of destiny, indeed.  Written pre-AWE based on fan speculation.  [2k.  Canon-divergent.  Will/Tia Dalma, background Sparrabeth.  PG-13.]

“Ocean Heart” - Post-AWE, Elizabeth is visited by Calypso on that lonely beach.  [1k.  Implied Willabeth.  No warnings.]

“The Pirate’s Progress” - Post-DMC, Jack takes a jaunt through the afterlife, featuring all sorts of fun mythology/folklore.  [10k.  I’m gonna be real with y’all, I don’t remember if there’s anything shippy or triggery but I don’t think so?  Implied major character death I guess but he got better]

“Worlds Enough, And Time” - Futuristic AU in which Jack and Elizabeth both partook of the Fountain of Youth.  Our beloved pirates...IN SPAAAAACE.  Angst with a happier ending.  [3k.  Sparrabeth, implied Willabeth.  Canon-divergent in multiple ways.  Warnings: alcohol, discussions of death, suicidal ideation, referenced minor character death.]

“Janus and the Prodigal” - A conversation between Jack and Teague, a few years post-AWE.  [1k.  Can be read as Sparrabeth.  No warnings.]

“At Peace” by Rising Waters - Author’s summary: Elizabeth has been faithful for the allotted ten years, so Will is free of the Dutchman—but he is still plagued by thoughts of a man whose death he feels responsible for: James Norrington.  [1k.  Willabeth, unrequited Norribeth.  Warnings: referenced character death.]

“Second Chances” by geekmama - AU in which James was only wounded by Bootstrap, not killed, and Will drops him off at Shipwreck Cove to be with Jack and Elizabeth for the next ten years.  Fluff all around.  [1k.  Willabeth, can be read as Sparrington if you’re not a coward.  No warnings.]

“For Honour A Heart’s Demise” by Meddow - Another AU in which James is only wounded aboard the Flying Dutchman, only this time he gets to partake in the rest of AWE and becomes captain of the Dutchman instead of Will.  A goddess is defied and everything makes sense.  [10k.  Willabeth, unrequited Norribeth.  Warnings: brief suicidal ideation, survivor’s guilt, grievous bodily harm, major character death (but he gets better).]

“Between Wind and Water” by rexluscus - Author’s description: “England and Spain are at war, and Norrington needs a quick solution to the Jack Sparrow problem. Meanwhile, Jack discovers that the Caribbean he once knew is gone. The deal they make could solve both their troubles, or it might be the worst mistake of their lives.  This story is AU after the first film (sequels never happened). It's an experiment in dropping POTC characters into an actual historical event: the Battle of Cartagena de Indias in 1741.”  [90.3k.  Sparrington.  See tags on AO3.]

“betwixt the devil and the deep sea” by notbecauseofvictories - A character study of Jack Sparrow in an AU with angels and demons.  [2k.  No ships.  See tags on AO3.]

“coda” by notbecauseofvictories - Elizabeth during her time as the Pirate King.  [1k.  Willabeth, Sparrabeth.  See tags on AO3.]

FICS I HAVE NOT YET FINISHED but would nevertheless like to recommend:

The “Rash Actions” series by @blanketed-in-stars​ - I’ve been meaning to finish this for 7000 years but I thoroughly enjoyed the early chapters!  Nicole is a wonderful writer and is doing the Lord’s work in writing quality Turrington content.  [147k.  James/Will.  See tags on AO3.]

“In Service to the King” by sleepylotus/@apirateslifeforme123​ - An AU in which Elizabeth finds James in Tortuga after she becomes the Pirate King.  I loved the first few chapters!  [31.7k.  Norribeth, Sparrabeth.  Explicit.  WIP.  See tags on AO3.]

OTHER LINKS SINCE I HAVE YOU HERE

Curse of the Black Pearl early screenplay (first draft)

Dead Man’s Chest screenplay (final production draft)

At World’s End early screenplay (leaked draft)

Deleted scenes: (CotBP above in Marooned) DMC, AWE

[susieskinner93]

Robert Sugden Week 2020

Day 6 - The lost years 

Robert stood in the garden, breathing in the fresh air when two arms wrapped around him from behind. He could immediately feel Aaron’s scent, and a second later his kiss, landing on his cheek.

“Thank you.” – he sighed with his eyes closed. He put his arms on Aaron’s trying to keep him in place.

“It’s just a hug.” – laughed Aaron.

“Not that.” – said Robert turning his head for a second but then he changed his mind and turned it back. – “That letter…. you, not giving up on me, even when I pushed you as far away as possible.”

“You gave it a good try I’ll give you that.” – smiled Aaron.

“Don’t.” – said Robert stepping away. Aaron’s arms fell from him as he stood there looking confused. – “It’s not funny.” – he said to him, and Aaron could see how all of this affected Robert.

“I’m sorry.” – he said quietly taking a step further to reach out to him. – “I was just trying to…”

“To make things easier… like it’s normal… I know.” – sighed Robert as he took a hold of Aaron’s hands. – “It’s… it’s still … fresh I guess.”

“It’s been only 3 weeks Rob.”

“I’m sorry that I always keep you up at night.” – he said referring to his insomnia. He was back for good but all those years in prison… it changes people. And Robert wasn’t an exception either.

“No, it’s alright.” – shrugged Aaron. Because to him, it was still worth it.  

“No Aaron it’s not.” – he argued.

“It really is.” – said Aaron not letting go. Robert needed to understand something. And he was determined to let him know. – “Because being without you… it was hell. And no, I’m not being daft. I know it’s nothing compared to what you’ve gone through, but it wasn’t fun for me either. And now? Having you home again… lying in the same bed… feeling you breathing next to me? It worth more to me than you can imagine. I wouldn’t mind staying up with you all night if I had to.”

“You mean that?” – asked Robert as he choked back tears.

“Robert, you’re home for 3 weeks now, ain’t it obvious?” – he asked with a smile. Luckily Robert returned it.

“Yeah, it’s just… hard to believe I guess. That you’re still here, that you still… want me….”

“I’ll always want you. I thought I proved myself on that front already.” – he said with a smug smile.

“Yeah… not like we were ever able to take it slow.” – smiled Robert. Okay, maybe they weren’t thinking about the same thing at first, because Aaron thought about how they ended up in bed not even 10 minutes after Robert set foot in the village again. And Robert referred to the moment Aaron pulled his drawer out to dug out a small box. A small box with their rings in it. It was roughly an hour after Robert knocked on his door. Now he could feel the metal around his finger, and it was such a satisfying feeling. He didn’t take it off ever since, and he swore to himself he won’t do it ever again.

To know that Aaron still had those feelings for him even after 4 years… it was too overwhelming in that moment. He still teared up at the thought. Aaron waited for him. They didn’t really talk about anything too deep… but he didn’t care. Aaron let him in, and the minute they kissed, Robert truly felt like he was finally home again.

Robert knew they were remembering the same thing as they looked into each other eyes, but then Robert broke eye contact and walked back to the house.

“Robert?” – called Aaron.

“Yeah?”

“When you’re ready… you can talk about anything… I mean about what happened in there… or… anything you want. We don’t have to make this into a big thing, you just start talking and I’ll listen. I promise.” – he said nodding. Robert could only do one thing after that. He stepped closer to Aaron before he kissed him slowly.

“I don’t deserve you.” – he whispered to Aaron. Aaron wanted to argue, but he knew Robert, it would’ve been an impossible task. So he just let it go. Even more so because Robert kissed him again, and that was when Aaron lost all common sense. His only focus was on Robert. Because he was home again, and he would never leave and knowing that, gave him a feeling that lifted him up high above the ground.

As time passed Robert slowly got back to his old self more or less. And from time to time he told Aaron bits. Not much, but it was enough. Aaron never pushed him. When Robert wanted to talk, he talked.

That’s how Aaron found out about the hospital.

“After the first year… around Christmas, I think… I got stabbed.” – he said once casually. They were making dinner and Robert thought that this was the right time to tell the story. Aaron lifted his head in seconds, gaping at him like a fish in a bowl. He didn’t say a word, because he could feel Robert wasn’t finished. –“I know you’ve noticed the scar... it’s not like I could hide it. Thanks for not pointing it out.” – said Robert. Not that Aaron didn’t want to know how he got that, because that first night when Robert returned and they took their clothes off, his hand brushed against the scar on his left side. It was big. Way too big to be ignored, but Aaron just looked at him with a million questions in his eyes. Robert just cupped his cheek, whispered “Not now” and they went back to business. Aaron didn’t question it ever since. But now Robert told him what happened.

“How?” – that’s all he could ask really. He was still in shock, although he guessed that he didn’t get it from an accident.

“Wrong place wrong time… you know how that works.” – shrugged Robert. – “There wasn’t any… reason. I tried to keep my head down, but trouble found me occasionally. That day I just couldn’t get out of it quick enough.”

“Did they…”

“They got me to hospital. I had an operation. Everything went smoothly, I was fine, I was back before new year’s eve.”

“Oh my god, Robert…”

“No, it’s really fine.” – assured him Robert, before he continued chopping the vegetables.

The next time Robert opened about his prison years they were up. It was late, around 3 am, and Robert felt guilty. He didn’t want Aaron to lie awake with him just because he couldn’t sleep. But since they were both awake…

“I had a counselor. Inside I mean.” – he said quickly checking if Aaron was listening. He was.  – “She helped me a lot.”

“Why did you…” - why did you start going he wanted to ask but he realized it was a stupid question. He was in prison, anybody would know how difficult that must have been. Aaron knew it first hand.

“At first I had to…. after the stabbing. They said it’s mandatory… for them to clear me, or something. And then… she offered me sessions. Not because I was… in a state or anything… just… to talk if I wanted to.”

“And did ya? Want to I mean.”

“At first I didn’t, but sometimes I felt so alone, and I just craved…. another human being’s voice? Not the thugs that would take offense at anything you say to them… good old fashioned conversation.”

“So you told her you wanted to go to those appointments?”

“Yeah… and it’s not like I told her much… or anything at first.” – he laughed. – “It got her a whole year before she tricked me into talking about you.”

“Me?”

“Yeah. She read my file. She tried to get me to open up. It turned out, you were the key.”

The next time Robert told Aaron something prison-related it was 2 days before he got to meet Seb again, for the first time since he got sent down. He was a big boy now, 6 years old, and Robert was bricking it. Aaron could see how much it bothered him, but he waited until Robert started talking.

“I thought about him every day.” – he smiled when they were snuggling on the couch one night, looking at photos. – “I pictured what he’d look like, what he must sound like… if he’s still just babbling or properly talking yet… god sometimes I spent the whole day thinking about what it would be like if I was still there, taking care of him…. with you.” – he said looking at Aaron.

“He looks like you.” – he said quietly. He knew because after basically harassing Rebecca she let him visit, from time to time. It was good for Seb as well. His little eyes lit up when he saw Aaron for the first time, and from the way he reached out to him, so Aaron could take him into his arms, it was hard to deny the love and affection.

“What if he forgot me?” – he asked sniffing.

“Impossible. He couldn’t I made sure of that.” – answered Aaron smiling.

“What if he asks why I was away?”

“You’ll tell him.”

“He’s 6!”

“Yeah and he’s your son, he’s smart.” – he said but he noticed how anxious Robert still was. – “Calm down, it’s all gonna be fine. And now that you’re here again, he can come to visit us more often… and maybe… after a while… he could come back…. permanently.” – offered Aaron biting his lip.

“Really? You’d want that?”

“Of course you idiot. I love that kid. I missed him just as much as you did when he wasn’t around.”

“I’m sorry about that, he should’ve stayed with you.”

“Oi, no more self-pity, alright?” – asked Aaron. – “Just wait and see how it’s gonna turn out.”

“Okay.”

“Aaron?” – said Robert as he walked down the stairs.

“Yeah? What’s up?” – he asked. Robert came home from prison exactly a year ago, and sometimes Aaron still felt like there were things he didn’t know about those years his husband spent inside. He wondered if he ever will.

“It’s just…” - started Robert with a bunch of letters in his hands.

“What are those?” – asked Aaron pointing to the pile in his husband’s hands.

“Letters…. I wrote them to you… all of them. When I was… inside.”

“But…”

“You never got them… I know. Because I never posted them.”

“What?”

“I had to let it all out, but after I wrote them, I read them back, and I just couldn’t find the strength to post them. I started writing them after my second year. I thought it was too late anyway. I just didn’t wanna stop you from moving on…”

“I haven’t.” – said Aaron interrupting him.

“I know. And I want you to read them. Whenever you want. I just.. I leave it here.” – he said placing them on the kitchen table. – “Just… promise me you’ll talk to me if you have questions or… I don’t know.” – he waved nervously. – “It sounds stupid, maybe…” - he said suddenly clearly changing his mind by the second.

“No, leave them here. I wanna read them. Robert, there cannot be a single line there, that would make me stop loving you, you know that right?”

“I love you too.” – he smiled dropping a quick kiss to his forehead before he aimed for the door.

“Where… where are you going?” – asked Aaron confused.

“It’s 4 pm I gotta pick up Seb. We’ll be back in a bit.” – he said reminding him.

“Oh, okay, I see you soon.” – said Aaron, knowing that as soon as Robert gets out the door, he’s gonna open the first letter.

Aaron,

It’s been way too long, and I know I have no right… but just listen.

[the-last-airbadger]

My 2020

Hey y’all. So 2020 happened. That was a thing. Apparently. I know for a lot of people this year was uhm… pretty shit… but it was still a year that happened so it’s time for my annual reflection post (probably the only time I still post about myself on tumblr lol) and maybe we might even find some good things that happened this year!

 The Beginning of 2020 vs Now

So, a lot has changed since the start of the year. A pandemic happened, for one. I can’t believe that a year ago I could still go to class every day and see my friends and now I’m pretty much stuck at home every day. The year started out pretty normal and then march happened and well, you all know what happened next. The worst part about the pandemic for me personally was probably the fact that I barely see my friends anymore and I can’t go to class every day. Some people may not think that not going to class is that bad, but I really enjoyed university more than I ever enjoyed school and I was really happy going there every day, and I was already sad I’d only have 4 to 5 years to spend there, so when that period got even shorter it made me kinda sad.

On the other hand, I do think that mentally I’m in a much better place than I was last year around this time. Being home this much really gave me time to reflect and work on my issues, and because my sister was stuck in our house for a couple of weeks I got to talk to her a lot which really helped me feel better. I think in general my entire family (my brother, sister and mom) have become a lot more open with each other which I think is great! I guess quarantine can have some benefits.

 The Best Things about 2020

Okay, here’s is where we’re going to get even more positive and go over all the good things that happened (to me) this year! To be honest, most of the year was a bit of a blur so I probably will forget quite a bit, but I’m going to give this a try anyway. At the start of the year (when things were still normal) I was super excited to get into the next semester, as the one before had,,, kinda sucked, and those 6 weeks of class I had at the start of the year were really great. I remember me and my friends having a competition of who could get mentioned the most in our teacher’s powerpoint presentation so those classes were always interesting. I also finally got to dye my hair for the first time with the help of my friends. I’ve been wanting to do that for so long, and I’m so happy I finally got to do it! I even know how to do it myself now, and my hair hasn’t been brown since the start of march! Then, at the start of march, my dad and stepmother moved away and I permanently moved in with my mom. Before, I used to live with both my mom and my dad and I got really really sick of switching houses every week, so to finally live in one house and have all my stuff in one place was a bit of a relief to me, and I’m still really happy with it. After that, things become a bit blurry. I remember that at the start of quarantine in … April? I watched Sex Education or the first time, which is now not only one of my favourite shows ever, but also taught me a lot and helped me with some of the issues I was dealing with. We’ll skip over the subsequent sexuality crisis I had (I think I might actually be straight??), and skip straight to the summer, when I started watching I-Land. I watched every episode as it aired live, and because of this show my Fridays really became the highlight of the week. I don’t think I’ve ever been so invested in a survival show XD. The rest of the year was mostly just me spending time with myself. It got a bit lonely sometimes, but I also don’t think I’ve ever written as much as I have this year, and my drawing has significantly improved (if I may say so myself)! Especially towards the end of the year, when I started making a planning every day to prevent myself from wasting away all my time on youtube, I got super productive, and I wrote a lot, and made a lot of art, and I really felt good. I even started (gasp) working out. Yeah I know. Shocking right.

There was also a lot of good music that was released this year, and, to close this section on a great note, through one of my classes I finally found a group of friends to play D&D with! We haven’t actually played yet, but we will, and I’m so excited to play the game and get to know these people more! They all seem really kind!

 My Resolutions for 2020?

Now, here’s the part where we check whether I actually reached all the goals I set myself for 2020. As usual, I have no idea what my resolutions were, so I honestly have no idea how I did. Let’s see, shall we?

Express my feelings more (as in I get really awkward in any sappy or mushy situation but I would like to be able to tell people I appreciate them without cringing) – UHM way to attack me on the very first resolution jeez. I did get more open with my family but I still can’t tell people I care about them without cringing so this is a fail lol

Again, learn to depend less on other people’s opinion and trust my own – I’ve been working on it, I think I’ve gotten a bit better? So win?

Get my sleeping schedule back on track – did that! It’s a bit whacky again now because of the holidays, but October and November were a big success regarding this resolution

WRITE MORE. This time I’ll make some concrete goals: Either I’ll get my story’s first draft done, or I’ll write 100 pages on a single project – okay, so here’s the thing. I don’t think I did any of these particular things, however this time I am 100% sure I wrote a lot more than the past years. I cannot count all the files and pages and notes I have now, but I wrote a lot, so I’m counting this as a win

I want to try NaNoWriMo (not necessarily in November, but at some point) – yeah, didn’t do that oops

I want to read a lot again but maybe not as much as this year because I want to focus on writing too. 40 books? – 49 books babey

Read all my current unread books (Aru Shah 2, Skullduggery Pleasant 9, Gemina, The Mistborn Trilogy and Call Down The Hawk) and finish my reread of Heroes of Olympus and the Raven Cycle) – Did all of these except Skullduggery Pleasant 9 (the start was so boring I decided not to read it all) and The Mistborn Trilogy (I am about halfway through the first book I think?) so I’m counting this as half a win

Finally read a book by V.E. Schwab (I’ve been wanting to try one of her books for ages) – Did that! Read a whole trilogy. It was good but not as great as I expected them to be. I think my expectations were too high though

Finish Playing Twilight Princess (I promised my brother) – Did that! I’m really proud of myself and so is my brother

Go. Swimming. Seriously. It’s scandalous that I still haven’t done that after waiting so long to be able to – IT’S BEEN 5 YEARS SINCE I LAST WENT SWIMMING WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME. I did buy new swimshorts but I still haven’t actually used them… shame on me

Try to worry less about school and not overwork myself – kinda?

Maybe try another drawing challenge somewhere this summer? I haven’t done any of those in a while and I feel like my art needs more attention – okay, so I didn’t do that, but I did at the start of the year make the resolution to make portrait/photoshoot-like drawings for my 8 main oc’s, and I did actually manage to finish that, and they are some of the best drawings I’ve ever made, so though I haven’t actually done a challenge specifically, I did do something

I want to try a 24 hour readathon – Yeah, didn’t do that oops

I kinda want to learn a piano piece as well, but I already have so many hobbies I want to focus on so I don’t know if I’ll have the time ☹ – yeah my dad sold our piano so… fail XD

 Expectations for 2021

Now, after last year I think it’s safe to say we can never really know what to expect. But! I’m going to guess anyway because it’ll be really fun to see next year whether I got anything right.

The first thing that I think will probably happen this year (if I don’t majorly mess anything up) is I’ll be writing my thesis next semester, and then in the summer I’ll get my bachelor’s degree. Honestly I can’t believe how fricking fast those 3 years went, but I guess I’ll just have to roll with it lol. Corona vaccinations will also probably start happening next year, and hopefully this will mean that going outside and seeing my friends will be possible again next year – at least a lot more than it was this year. I hope 2021 will be the year of hanging out with friends and getting to live a little again. Maybe even get to go to class. That would be great.

On to more minor – but no less exciting – things, 2021 will probably bring us a new season of Sex Education! I’m sooo excited for that holy shit. And, in a similar vein, I have high hopes for kpop releases now that SHINee is finally back, and it looks like Haseul is also returning to LOONA! 2021 will also be the year in which ENHYPEN makes their first comeback, and some of the other I-LAND contestants will also make their debut, and there might even be a new season of I-LAND as well in the summer? So there’s a lot of things to look forward to. Oh, and I almost forgot, Dan Howell’s book will be released in May, and there will be a new Grishaverse book, and the Shadow and Bone show will start airing, which I am really curious about. Again, lots of things to look forward to!

 2021 Resolutions

I’m not feeling as ambitious as I was last year, but there are a couple of things I want to try and do, so let’s jump into the resolutions!

I just came up with this today, but I think I want to try and build a bit of a skincare routine? The skin on my nose is kinda flakey, and I think it couldn’t hurt to try and take better care of my skin

Keep up with my daily workouts. I want to work out every day, except when I’m at my dad’s or when it’s a special day, like Christmas or something.

Be able to do either 50 push-ups on my knees, 25 normal push-ups, or both

GO SWIMMING

Keep up with planning daily! It’s a really good way to balance all of my 3195 hobbies and it helps me to not get stressed about school

Write (almost) every day. I need to make it a habit

Draw at least once a week, every other day if possible

Go outside at least once a week. That doesn’t seem very hard but with corona I did not realise how little I go outside if I am not forced to. Sometimes I spend 3 weeks without going out and I don’t even notice it. That can’t be good for me lol

Try to make healthier food choices. Maybe follow the lunch meal plan of the guy whose workout videos I follow.

Get my bachelor’s degree

Grow a beard. I’m getting closer… I know I’m getting closer…

Meet with my frIENDS and give them the alBUMS I have for them

Be more careful with my money, maybe even save a bit of money

Spend less time on social media

Read more educational books

I think that’s it! I can’t think of anything else right now so these will have to do. I wish that 2021 will treat all of you much better than whatever mess 2020 was! Happy 2021!

Last year’s post: (x)

@the-official-pentacorn @asiandutchgirl

[ts1989fanatic]

TS7 is finally here!

If you’re like me or any of the millions of Swifties out there, the arrival of this next era is just as exciting as a brand-new bookshelf full of reads you get to experience for the first time.

After listening to the album on repeat all weekend, I decided to celebrate Lover with a book roundup inspired by each of the songs (since it’s the only thing I’ll be listening to for the foreseeable future, don’t @ me.).

ts1989fanatic an interesting perspective well written obviously a swiftie.

1. “I Forgot That You Existed” (Best Friends Forever, by Jennifer Weiner)

You heard it from Taylor first: indifference is the new vengeance. This solid album-opener is upbeat and poppy, a nice contrast with the lyrics about the (final?) end of a broken relationship, friendship (or feud), when you actually forget that the person you once had so much ire for still lives. She transitions from “Your name on my lips, tongue-tied/Free rent, living in my mind” to “forgot that you existed/and I thought that it would kill me, but it didn’t” with ease. But of course, insisting that you forget someone existed while singing about them would introduce interesting tension into any relationship. It reminded me of Jennifer Weiner’s Best Friends Forever, about what happens when a former friend shows up on your doorstep in a crisis, insisting you’re the only one who can help them out of a tight spot (when you’d rather do anything but).

2. “Cruel Summer” (Do You Want to Start a Scandal, by Tessa Dare)

Lyrically and sonically, this is one of my favorites on the entire album (it’s so good it should have been a single!) It’s got an Out of the Woods meets Getaway Car vibe in terms of the melody. Wistful, a bit haunting, but also a total bop. “So cut the headlights, summer’s a knife/I’m always waiting for you just to cut to the bone” describes a low point in Swift’s life (Summer 2016, ugh), juxtaposed with the high of discovering new love. There are so many books I could have picked for this, but “I don’t want to keep secrets just to keep you” reminded me of the Regency romance trope where the heroine has a secret, or finds herself in a situation where her reputation is at stake, but is still tempted by a handsome rogue who might lead her into temptation and true love. (Sound a bit familiar?) Do You Want to Start a Scandal by Tessa Dare feels like the perfect accompaniment to this song about a woman who must prove her innocence in the face of a sullied reputation or be forced to marry a man she doesn’t think she could ever love.

3. “Lover” (Roomies, by Christina Lauren)

The title track (and the one I’ve been singing in the shower for days) is a swoony daydream of a couple in complete harmony, as Swift spins wedding vow-like lyrics such as “With every guitar string scar on my hand/I take this magnetic force of a man to be my…lover/My heart’s been borrowed and yours has been blue/all’s well that end’s well to end up with you/swear to be overdramatic and true/to my…lover.” But Swift is all about balance in her songs, so imagery of keeping up the Christmas lights in “our place” is juxtaposed with suspicion that “everyone who sees you wants you.” This track reminded me of Roomies by Christina Lauren, with its musician main character and the trope of having to share a space while inevitably falling in love.

4. “The Man” (The Whisper Network, by Chandler Baker)

The double-standards between men and women have been explored in songs and novels since both art forms existed. Swift has already confronted the media’s perception of her as a victim, as a girl who goes on too many dates but can’t make them stay, etc. But in “The Man”, she more directly confronts how different she’d be treated if she were the opposite gender. How could I not think of the new thriller The Whisper Network, about a group of women who come forward about their male boss’ behavior of harassment in the workplace. Instead of continuing to suffer in silence, they tell the truth, resulting in an explosive conflict. I sort of saw the ending coming, but was very glad I was right.

5. “The Archer” (Pride and Prejudice, by Jane Austen)

Another slower, lyric-driven track on the album with gut-punching truths about love, friendship, and holding on to the one who has your heart. “The Archer” is associated with being a Sagittarius (which Swift is), but also her dynamic with the world. “Who could ever leave me, darling?/But who could stay?” is self-aware in a new way for Swift, as is “I never grew up, it’s getting so old” or “I see right through me.” This is one of my favorite tracks on the album, as Swift confronts her cultivated image as both archer and prey of fame and of love. Listening to the rising energy of the track as it builds to a anti-fairy-tale crescendo plus Swift’s lyrics made me think of Pride and Prejudice: Elizabeth Bennet is forced to acknowledge how her own prejudices have made it difficult for others to love her, but that she is deserving of an imperfect love. (And how could “All of my enemies started out friends” not remind you of awful Mr. Wickham?)

6. “I Think He Knows” (The Duke and I, by Julia Quinn)

After a slower song, this heats things up a bit, describing the early sizzle of a relationship before it even starts. For an entire album that sings the praises of a man, I liked the moment in the pre-chorus where she says “He’s so obsessed with me, and boy, I understand.” Own your worth, girl! The bridge was my favorite part of this song (as it often is with Swift; girl knows how to bridge) as it played with tempo and rhyme. “Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh/We can follow the sparks, I’ll drive.” Swift explores the tension of the moment between seeing someone and initiating contact—songs like these always sting with a bit of danger, too, because the man knows she wants him but neither of them say anything in public about it. She’s whispering in the dark, which gives me serious secret romance vibes. The Duke and I by Julia Quinn is about Simon, who is planning to propose to his BFF’s sister even though he doesn’t actually love her. It’s an arrangement that suits them both, but before they both know it, Daphne is giving Simon serious “I Think he Knows” vibes.

7. “Miss Americana & the Heartbreak Prince” (The Cheerleaders, by Kara Thomas)

If you don’t get the oft-spoken adage that “politics is like high-school,” this song takes the metaphor to the next level. Subtly political but 100% heartbreaking, Swift reimagines the political sphere (and her role in it) as a high school romance, moving from “American glory, faded before me,” painting the democratic 2016 election loss as a ripped-up prom dress (from Miss Americana, who assumed she would win.) Oozing drama and storytelling the way only Swift can, I love the moody elements of the brokenhearted girl contrasted with the new riff on a cheerleading chant (Go Fight Win!). This song is about mourning loss and then finding the strength to say “I know we’re going to win,” but it’s haunting melody and lyrics led me to pick a Cheerleader-inspired thriller. The Cheerleaders is about a string of cheerleaders murdered in a small town five years ago… and just when everyone thinks it’s time to move on, one girl becomes the center of a mystery that never truly died.

8. “Paper Rings” (The Royal We, by Heather Cocks and Jessica Morgan)

I’m on my fourth listen of the album and this might be my favorite track on it (though that changes minute by minute, with an album as dynamic as this—just to further accentuate the point, by the time of posting this piece, my new favorite might be I Think He Knows?). It’s a totally retro, ’60s style song—a totally fresh sound for Swift, and one that fits perfectly with her new aesthetic. (Makes me wonder why this wasn’t one of the singles released before the record.) It is a gold-mine for Swiftian lyricism, with so many gems I can’t possibly call them all out, and it moves so fast (like a good read) that you both want to cascade over them and pause to hear each line at least 5x before it passes you by. It’s an unabashed love song, relishing in the joy of knowing you’re with the one you love so much that “I like shiny things, but I’d marry you with paper rings”. The line that stuck out the most was “I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this,” which made me think of when Bex Porter goes to Oxford in The Royal We and, completely by accident, falls in love with the heir to the throne.

9. “Cornelia Street” (Passion on Park Avenue, by Lauren Layne)

“Cornelia Street” is sort of the antithesis to I Think He knows. It’s about remembering the early days of a new relationship (“We were a fresh page on the desk/filling in the blanks as we go”) and being more than willing to give up all the good that comes with fresh starts in order to settle into something real. It aches with melancholy, because any time we give something up should be a little sad—but it brims with hope and Swift’s trademarked optimism about love. “I hope I never lose you, hope it never ends/I’d never walk Cornelia Street again/ That’s the kinda heartbreak time could never mend.” I had to pick an NYC-set story for this, like Lauren Layne’s Passion on Park Avenue. The city is another character in the romance between a successful jewelry-business owner and the son of the woman her mother used to work for.

10. “Death By a Thousand Cuts” (Please Don’t Go Before I Get Better, by Madisen Kuhn)

Inspired by the Netflix movie Something Great, this is one of the few sad songs on the record, about a girl going through a breakup who can’t help but linger in happier memories. (For the record: “I dress to kill my time” is genius, as are so many of these lyrics.) Only Swift is so good at pairing such devastating messaging with a pop beat you can’t help but want to sing. This song was the hardest one to pick a book for (especially because it’s already inspired by a movie) so I decided to go with a poetry collection! Please Don’t Go Before I Get Better is all about the aches and sun rays of growing up, told in a staggeringly relatable voice that will make you want to curl up on the couch and cry your eyes out.

11. “London Boy” (Red, White and Royal Blue, by Casey McQuiston)

This is 100% about Joe Alwyn, but also… Taylor dated at least two Brits that we know of before him, so this song is also about what we already knew (“the rumors are true”): she has a penchant for London Boys. Essentially a road map of her favorite places in the city, this indulgent ditty trades “Tennessee Whiskey” for “A gray sky, a rainy cab ride” and of course, her man by her side. Red, White, and Royal Blue is the perfect pick for this song, about two boys who fall in love (after a rough start where they were almost enemies) amidst those gray, rainy skies… but one of them happens to be the son of an American President, and the other, the current Prince of England.

12. “Soon You’ll Get Better (feat. Dixie Chicks)” (Swamplandia! by Karen Russell)

Of all the songs on the album, this one gave me the most vintage Swift vibes. There’s no denying that she is an astonishingly talented songwriter, especially when you listen to what is essentially her greatest fear laid bare on this track with just a bit of guitar and the Dixie Chicks harmonizing in the background. Here, the story shines: Swift’s mother has been sick for a number of years, and while they’ve mostly kept the details of that battle private, this is the most vulnerable moment of love for her mother on an album mostly about finding true love. “Holy orange bottles, each night I pray to you/Desperate people find faith, so now I pray to Jesus, too.” A friend of mine recently lost their mother just after getting married, and it made me marvel at how life often delivers us highs and lows to grapple with simultaneously. While all of this was going on—Kanye and Kim, Joe and London, another world tour, another album—in the background, Swift has been terrified of losing her mother. This song made me think of Swamplandia!, a novel about a young girl living in a gator-wrestling theme park where her mother used to be the main event, until she passed away. Now, in the wake of her death, the girl and her siblings must grapple with their mother’s legacy as a competing business rises up to swallow the success she built on the swamp.

13. “False God” (City of Girls, by Elizabeth Gilbert)

Is that a saxophone in the background of a Taylor Swift song? This slow, jazzy number is all about love and desire—and how we come back to it even when the world around us (and sometimes we, ourselves) put it in jeopardy. “And I can’t talk to you when you’re like this/Staring out the window like I’m not your favorite town/I’m New York City” and other lyrics referencing New York seem to be the grounding force in an otherwise tumultuous relationship. Multiple times on this record Swift has alluded to rough patches in her current happiness, but connection is always the solution to fixing it. She seems to say that if you treat your relationship like it’s your religion, you can get through anything. This is one of the sexier songs on the album, but it’s also got serious NYC vibes, so I’m picking City of Girls by Elizabeth Gilbert: a novel all about relishing romance in the glitzy 1940’s New York Theater scene, but also how desire can either set us on the road to ruin, or redemption.

14. “You Need to Calm Down” (The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo, by Taylor Jenkins Reid)

This song has done what Swift does best: inspire conversation and a bit of controversy. Acknowledging that it was past time for her to be an outspoken ally for the LGBTQIAP+ community, YNTCD tackles the various ways communities are pitted against one another (especially on the internet.) The first verse examines her personal haters (“Say it in the street, that’s a knock-out/But you say it in a Tweet, that’s a cop-out), the second calls out homophobes (“Shade never made anybody less gay”), and the third examines how her relationships with her female contemporaries have often been antagonistic, something she herself has been responsible perpetuating in the past with songs like “Bad Blood” and “Better Than Revenge” (“We all know now, we all got crowns/you need to calm down.”) The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo is about a famous actress who hid the great female love of her life behind multiple male partners and uses her platform to tell the truth (all while hiding one last devastating secret). While Taylor herself has not come out as part of the LGBTQ community, she has come out as an ally, and this book made me think about the issues of privacy, platform, allyship, and identity that the song also confronts. If there’s more to the story of Swift’s relationship to the LGBTQIAP+ community, she’s going to share it on her own terms.

15.“Afterglow” (Queenie, by Candice Carty-Williams)

This song ranks high on my favorites from the album, and it’s a rare genre from Swift: the apology song. (The other famous one is Speak Now’s “Back to December.”) In this mid-tempo song with slamming drums and a breathy falsetto, Swift yearns for the partner she pushed away to meet her in the moments after the fight ends. “It’s all me, in my head/I’m the one who burned us down/ but it’s not what I meant,” she insists. There’s still hope here though, as opposed to earlier songs on the record that signal the doom of a friendship or a breakup after-the-fact. Queenie, by Candice Carty-Williams, is a novel about a girl coming to terms with her role in a failed relationship, a career she can’t seem to succeed in, and friends she unknowingly betrays. “Why’d I have to break what I love so much?” is a question asked in this song’s chorus, and one Queenie must answer in order to find real, lasting happiness.

16. “ME! (feat. Brendon Urie)” (Crazy Rich Asians, by Kevin Kwan)

This self-love anthem is bubblegum sweet and full of earworms: the “Shake it Off“ of the TS7 Era. It makes me think of lightning-fast beach reads that you can’t put down and that feel so good to read but also have a deeper meaning to them. Just because it’s not the most lyrically advanced of her songs doesn’t mean this bop doesn’t deserve to be celebrated— it reminded me of how romances constantly get a bad rep (lol, see what I did there?) as somehow lesser than other genres. I love that Taylor doesn’t care about what other people think and is 100% focused on being her authentic self— just like the heroine of Crazy Rich Asians, Rachel Chu. When confronted with the wealth and expectations of her boyfriend Nick’s family (who don’t think she’s good enough for him), she insists it’s her individuality that makes her the perfect partner for him.

17. “It’s Nice to Have a Friend” (This Love Story Will Self-Destruct, by Leslie Cohen)

This track might be my second favorite? It’s so different (Ukulele? Trombone? Is that what I’m hearing?) and such a contrast to the beginning of the album, the opener closes the door on a once meaningful friendship. It’s also a deceiving song, in that I’m still not 100% sure what it’s about. I think Swift is exploring the importance of friendship in all its forms: in childhood (“School bell rings, walk me home”) to adolescence “Something gave you the nerve/to touch my hand”) to romantic love (“Church bells ring, carry me home/rice on the ground looks like snow”). Ultimately, she may be saying that the most important thing about a romantic partner is that they make you feel like you have a friend—when you’re young, the thing that matters most is feeling seen by other people. If your lover is also your best friend, then you know they always have your back. A love story that takes place over two characters’ twenties, This Love Story Will Self-Destruct is about the missteps, betrayals, beautiful moments and connection that forms between two people over a decade.

18. “Daylight” (Evvie Drake Starts Over, by Linda Holmes)

“My love was as cruel as the cities I lived in.” What a way to begin this album closer. Swift’s last tracks have a tradition of being the ones that are most emblematic of her current state of mind, but they also have developed certain themes over time. Renewal, starting over, self-reflection, and hope are all subjects “Daylight” sheds a little light on. She acknowledges past failings (“I wounded the good and trusted the wicked”) and what she wants for the future (“I once believed love would be [burning red]/but it’s golden”). A book that feels like daylight on your skin is what’s needed for this song, and I think Evvie Drake Starts Over is the perfect pick: a story about a woman still grieving the loss of her husband but who finds herself moving on with a former major league baseball player. Both of them have pasts they are healing from, but together, they find hope for the future. “I’ve been sleeping so long in a twenty-year dark night/and now I see daylight.” And, unlike (I think?) any other song in her catalogue, she speaks in the end, not sings, in a direct appeal to her audience. Her very last words are “You are what you love.” Well, I love Taylor Swift. I love a good song lyric to sink my teeth into, or to sing. I love love. And I love a good story, whether it comes from a song or a book, and when you’re done with the album, I hope you find some here.

[unfortunatelyevent]

Last 10 Fics Tag Meme

Rules: Post the first lines of your last ten fics read or written and then tag others to do the same.

so i saw this and i really liked it so i’m doing it

1. Visceral Reactions by STARSdidathing (frostiron)

Tony wasn’t entirely sure how it happened.

One moment, he was chained to a wall in Loki’s latest warehouse lair and the mage was monologing. Tony was delivering his usual snarky one liners in response and Loki was trying not to look amused.

They were enemies just doing their thing and passing time until someone could save Tony (or he could save himself).

The point was, Loki was mid-monologue, throwing in some “mortals are beneath me, I hate you all” crap. Tony was rebutting that Loki was an Asgardian snob and, a total liar because he knew Loki liked a lot of Earth food, clothing and music.

Loki was towering over him and glowering.

And then... then they were kissing.

2. Friends Don’t Let Friends by theorytale (frostiron)

Steve was angling his shield to deflect a blast from Loki's staff, when out of nowhere the Hulk dropped down - splintering the concrete under their feet - and scooped Loki up in one massive green hand. Steve cringed reflexively even as he relaxed his stance. Loki was an evil bastard, sure, but watching Hulk use him like that whack-a-mole game was just… uncomfortable.

Only, Hulk didn't smash.

Loki struggled uselessly, yelling for the Hulk to put him down. It was kind of funny how fast the guy could go from menacing and legitimately frightening to… kind of pitiful. The cognitive dissonance gave Steve a headache.

Hulk lifted Loki up and peered at him intently, brow furrowed. "What puny god's intentions?"

3. Obliviousness Can Lead To True Love by pointnclickbait (science boyfriends)

Bruce swore softly shooting a glance at his watch as he hurried to the next presentation. This conference was turning out to be more hectic than he had expected. He had been hoping to catch a couple of presentations in particular but had already managed to miss some of them. The one he was hoping to attend the most was after the one he was currently running to. He really hoped he didn’t miss it. He paused at the entrance to the conference room to catch his breath before entering. He stepped in and scanned the room before hurrying to the one free space he could see. He settled down just as the speaker took to the floor.

He was so invested in what he was hearing that he forgot to keep an eye on the time and wasn’t aware of it until he was applauding the conclusion of the presentation. He looked at his watch absentmindedly before doing a double take when he saw the time. Swearing loudly this time he tried to squeeze his way through the crowd. By the time he finally escaped the room more precious time had elapsed. Inevitably by the time he reached his destination there was no possible way that he could have gotten inside. He let out a sigh of frustration and scrubbed his hand through his hair. It looked like he wasn’t getting into Tony Stark’s talk after all. He dropped his hand with another sigh. He’d been looking forward to the talk all weekend. It was the reason he had asked to have his presentation given so early, he had been hoping that he wouldn’t have to worry about the talks clashing. He swallowed his disappointment and headed for the dining hall hoping to eat his feelings.

4. The Language of Love by 1derspark (kaysanova)

To be in Jerusalem is to be hard of hearing.

Nicolo learns quickly there was no silence to be had in the city. Even on the way here, there is noise: the breaking of waves against a Genoese ship, the clamor of a thousand knights and horses, their armor clattering like heavy shells on the march to the holy city.

There is never silence. In Jerusalem it’s as if God were screaming, and with every hoarse screech the devil answered.

The battlefield is everywhere, and so is the blood. The sound of death, the sound of pain. Nicolo has dreamed in war cries for years, so this did not bother him. He dreamed in black curls, a dark helm pulled over an angry face, teeth bared and chattering in a language he did not understand but would soon come to hear very frequently.

He meets this man — the one that roars and tramples down swathes of armies beneath his feet — not too long after the fighting starts.

5. Here We Are, Born to be Kings by Purple_ducky00 (iron husbands)

“Your Highness. Lord Stark is here to see you.” Quentin Beck holds up his nose.

Prince James Rhodes rolls his eyes. It’s not like Beck should judge. He was only hired because his family was in serious debt.  Tony is working out of his.

Tony walks in a few minutes later, hair askew. “Wow, Rhodey, your servants hate me. I call it an achievement.”

“They just think it’s ok to judge since their scandals happened long ago enough for people to forget. You don’t deserve this.”

“I probably do.” Tony shrugs. “It doesn’t bother me. Actually, it gives me the chance to ditch my politeness because they already dislike me.”

6. Impossible Things by accioromulus (wolfstar)

Sirius arrives at the party two hours late and covered in snow. Facebook had suggested around thirty people were coming—a number which already threatened to overwhelm James and Lily’s tiny flat. When Sirius arrives at just past ten however, he immediately wishes he’d brought a sledge hammer, if only to make it past the front door. It’s clear that no less than fifty guests had burrowed their way inside. They stand in every corner, filling the narrow hallways and spilling out from every room, their faces vaguely familiar to him, their chattering bright and enthusiastic. Music drifts in from the sitting room, and it takes Sirius a moment to recognize it, bizarrely, as Christmas Carols, despite the New Years Eve decorations strung about the walls. He turns a corner, attempting suave and casual, but instead narrowly avoids a party-goer's over-enthusiastic elbow by crashing into Lily Evans.

7. greater love has no one than this by Jack_R (kaysanova) ((THIS IS A FAVE))

‘I am not going to Rum,’ Yusuf said. ‘They are filthy, depraved degenerates, and I will not bring dishonour on the house of my father by consorting with these Greeks dogs.’

‘I thought your mother was Greek,’ Niccolò said, mildly.

‘Then you should trust me when I say that their entire civilisation is simply beyond saving,’ Yusuf said.

8. fearfully and wonderfully made by bethecowboy (kaysanova)

Yusuf’s blood buzzes so hard through his veins that it takes all his effort to stay still. Every part of him longs for motion, for justice, for a swift end to the constant exhaustion.

He always calms his limbs, his mind, in time for Fajr: his forehead kisses the ground as the new sun soaks the sand in deep russet oranges. Light glints of the breastplates of dead Christians; it caresses the faces of his fallen brothers who had died defending the outer wall.

9. Genus and Species by 27dragons, tisfan (winteriron)

When Bucky opened his eyes, all he could see was green in all directions. At first he thought that was just the remainder of the Time Stone’s power. Thanos had done… something. No one quite knew what because the battle had been so confusing; the Power Stone blasting purple rays everywhere, the Space Stone moving people out of position, lord only knew what was happening with the Reality Stone. And then there had been a great, green wave of energy--

“Ug,” said someone nearby. It took Bucky a moment to clear his thoughts enough to identify it: Tony. “I feel like a Pride parade just swallowed me whole and then puked me out.” A pause. “Why are we in a jungle?”

10. Through The Years by hawkbucks (winteriron)

Tony is 8 and Natasha is 12 when Tony brings Natasha home for the first time.

“Mamma!” he brightly exclaims as soon as Maria opens the door, holding up one of his hands that is intertwined with one of Natasha’s. “This is Natasha! She helped me while I was walkin’ home from school today.” Before Maria can say anything, Tony is already rushing past her, dragging his newfound friend into the living room with him. He leads her to the rather lavish, cream-colored couch that’s bigger than necessary and tells her to sit down, letting go of her hand.

“Some’a the kids at school were followin’ me and sayin’ bad things to me,” Tony starts to explain as he takes off his patent leather shoes, remembering what his mother said about tracking dirt into the house. “But Natasha made ‘em go away. Then she said she’d keep walkin’ with me so that I’d get home all safe. She was really awesome!”

and that’s that, i have to say that i absolutelly love and rec all of these!

ok i’m tagging: @natyhunter @atypical-snowman @simplyclockwork @camp-half-dumbass and whoever wants!!! (also everyone i tagged please don’t feel obligated!!!)