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#i need to live my life however bad it gets
wheres-mylove · 3 days
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puppy love - modern!cregan stark x fem!reader
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Summary: Searching for peace in a quiet town takes an unexpected turn when your neighbor’s dog decides you have to be his new best friend. One look at the neighbor and you’re totally fine with getting a two-for-one deal.
Disclaimer: English isn't my first language!
Word count: 2.5k
A large painting of a wolf pack hung over the fireplace. (Y/N) stared at it, biting her lip.  
She wasn’t even sure she knew how to light the damn fire.
Was this whole thing a bad idea? Trading in her modern King’s Landing studio for a tiny house in Winterfell? A big city girl in a small town. Yeah, she might’ve officially lost her mind.
“I hope it’s to your liking, dear,” came the sharp but grounding voice of Mrs. Glover, snapping her back to reality. The elderly landlady was already fastening her fur coat.
“It’s... cozy,” she replied with her best smile. Didn’t want to admit to herself that she was feeling wildly out of place.
“Good.” Mrs. Glover nodded, satisfied. “Now, remember, once the snow hits, you’ll need to keep that fireplace going. Northern frost is a bitch.” She placed the house keys on the small wooden table. “Rent’s due by the tenth.”
“I’ll remember,” (Y/N) said quickly. “Thanks again for lowering the price.”
Mrs. Glover waved her hand dismissively. “Don’t even mention it. I’m in a hurry to get to Essos, and these silly umbrella cocktails are calling my name.”
The old woman paused at the door. “You sure you can handle moving everything in on your own? I have to head out, but the Stark boy lives just across the street. Strong lad, good arms, I’m telling ya. Handsome, too. He’d help, if you ask nicely.” She winked. “If I were only a few decades younger…”
“All good, ma’am,” (Y/N) cut in, her face heating up. “I don’t have much. A few boxes, really.”
“Well, if you say so, Miss Independent. Good luck!”
With that, Mrs. Glover disappeared with a screech of tires in her flaming red car, leaving (Y/N) standing alone in front of her new home.  
She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. She could absolutely do this. She’d unpack before sundown, get settled, and everything would be fine. Better than fine, even. This place was going to be a fresh start. An escape from the Big Disaster, also known as her last relationship.
She’d find the meaning of life in the wild North or however that saying went.
She was currently standing in front of her open trunk, debating what to take first. And then something licked her hand.
Slowly, she turned her head, still not fully registering what was happening, and met the gaze of big brown eyes belonging to a fluffy creature as black as the night. A light pink tongue paused halfway, as if waiting for her reaction.
“Oh, gods,” she whispered, frozen in place. “Are you a dog or a wolf? Please, be a dog. A friendly one.”
Her new friend barked in response and rolled onto its back in the universal gesture of please love me.
“You’re a dog,” she sighed in relief, dropping to her knees to give him a good belly rub. “A boy, huh? A beautiful one. But where did you come from?”
Animals don’t talk apparently. The girl glanced around instead. She’d left the gate open, sure, but he had to come from somewhere.
The dog let out a low grumble, tail thumping against the ground. She scratched his head, laughing softly. After a few minutes, he got up, shook off the dust, and placed one paw on her car.
“I’m moving into this house,” she informed him, picking up one of the smaller boxes from the trunk. She liked talking to pets, even though they couldn’t offer much in the way of conversation. “I’ve got a lot to do, but after that, we could—”
And just like that, the dog vanished as suddenly as he’d appeared. (Y/N) stood there, blinking at the empty yard.
“Bye?” she called out, shaking her head in disbelief. He probably went home.
She continued unpacking, but on her third trip to the car, she saw him again, this time with a tennis ball clamped between his teeth. He had so much hope in his eyes.
“Do you want to play?” she asked, amused. The moment she said the magic word, his ears perked up in excitement. “Where are you even from?”
She should have been unpacking. She knew that. But how could she say no to a cutie like him?
“Good boy!” (Y/N) laughed as the dog leapt into the air and caught the ball in his mouth, mid-throw.
“Excuse me, is he harassing you, lady?” she suddenly heard a low, masculine voice behind her.
The dog dropped the ball from his mouth, adopting a tragic, martyr-like expression.
She spun around, heart pounding, and found herself face-to-face with a man who looked like a classic Northern lord from the past. Tall, broad-shouldered, with dark, wild hair and a beard that framed a strong jaw. He had these gray eyes that were both piercing and soft.
“He’s mine,” the stranger explained with a half-smile, clearly catching her staring.
“Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to steal him, just so you know” (Y/N) finally spoke up, cheeks flushing. “He just... showed up. With the ball. So, I thought…”
Her awkward explanation was interrupted by his laugh, loud and kind.
“Don’t worry, I didn’t think you were kidnapping him,” he said, hands in his pockets. “I was just making sure he wasn’t bothering you. He must’ve jumped the fence. I saw you two from across the street.”
Ah. The young Stark. 
“No, not at all,” she reassured him, finally getting her words in order. “He’s well-behaved. What’s his name?”
The dark cloud of fur came closer and laid at her feet, cementing their new alliance.
The man hesitated for a moment. (Y/N) looked at him expectantly.
“Frosty,” he finally mumbled, looking at the ground.
It was the girl’s turn to laugh.
“You named this huge black wolf-ass looking creature Frosty?” she asked, scratching the dog behind his ears. He was absolutely delighted.
“He likes the cold,” Stark offered with a small shrug, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. “And you are…?”
“(Y/N). I’d shake your hand, but I’m doing something important. Nice to meet you though.” 
“Cregan,” he said, placing a hand over his heart with a grin. “Nice to meet you too. Frosty’s obviously on cloud nine. He’s usually not that trusting. Friendly with other dogs, sure, but picky with people. You must be special.”
Her heart swelled at those words. What an honor.
“He’s my first friend in Winterfell.”
Cregan smiled and looked at her car, noticing the boxes still inside.
“So, renting from Mrs. Glover?”
“Yeah, I just moved in from King’s Landing today.”
“City girl, yeah?” He whistled, leaning against the side of the car with a thoughtful look. “You’ve come a long way. But hey, I’m not complaining. We’re neighbors now. I live across the street.”
(Y/N) flashed a smile. “I’m not complaining either.”
“Please feel welcome to ask if you ever need anything. I’ll give you my number, just in case.”
Smooth, Cregan, smooth.
Rolling up his sleeves, Cregan walked over and hefted the biggest box out of the trunk like it was nothing.
“Now, let’s help you with that.”
That old hag was right. He had good arms.
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The Northern frost was, indeed, a bitch.
But the warmth of the fire, the soft couch beneath her, and Frosty’s massive, fluffy body draped across her lap made the afternoon bearable. (Y/N)’s hand had long since gone numb from petting the dog, but his fur was addictive.
Her phone suddenly rang, breaking the peace. Frosty, naturally, didn’t move a bit. Not even a nuclear explosion could wake him.
Sighing, (Y/N) reached for her phone on the table, already knowing who it was. 
Helaena Targaryen.
“How’s the grass-touching and vet-seducing going?” came Helaena’s voice, sugary sweet and teasing, before (Y/N) even had a chance to say hello.
“First of all, the grass is frozen solid,” (Y/N) shot back, shifting slightly to keep her lap from completely losing circulation. “And second, again. There is no seducing happening.”
“Sure, smarty-pants. And you’re totally not babysitting his dog right now.”
“I mean,” (Y/N) sighed with a reluctant smile. “said dog kind of invited himself here. And Cregan gave him a backpack full of snacks and toys, like he was dropping him off at daycare.”
He had also scolded him earlier for having dirty paws, saying that’s not how he raised him. The dog liked her, and she liked both him and his owner. Cregan turned out to be a veterinarian with a small clinic in town. He was working late today, so she had offered to look after his friend. Home office benefits.
Hel snorted loudly on the other end. “Oh my god, he’s ridiculous. I love it. By the way, I did a tarot reading for you,” she announced, suddenly taking on a serious and spiritual tone. “The message is clear. Go after Cregan, let him chop wood and start the fire in your—”
(Y/N) groaned, facepalming. “You’ve got to stop. I’m not ready for this. And he’s just kind.”
“Kind of having a crush on you. You’re still hurting after that Gwayne situation, aren’t you?”
The mention of his name made her feel sick. “It’s not about him. I’m just... done with dating for a while.”
“Well, he was a moron,” Helaena said bluntly, her tone shifting from teasing to fierce in a heartbeat. “For the record, we all stopped talking to him. Aemond wanted to beat him up, but I told him karma would do the job.”
(Y/N) winced, though she appreciated Targaryens’ loyalty. “I’m tired of men.”
“You’re not tired of men,” Helaena corrected her. “You’re tired of idiots. Is Cregan an idiot?”
She knew he wasn’t.
“Hey, if you don’t make a move, I will.”
“You’re the worst.”
“Kidding. But please, please, for the love of gods, make him chop some wood for you.”
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A strange noise woke her up.
It sounded like something was scratching at the front door. (Y/N) rubbed her eyes, groaning as she crawled out from under the warm blanket. A quick glance at the digital clock. 5:58 a.m. The sun hadn’t even thought about rising yet. The scratching persisted.
“If this is some kind of monster, I swear I’m not in the mood,” she mumbled, her voice heavy with sleep. Then came a familiar bark, and she frowned.
Frosty?
She cracked the door open, and sure enough, there on the porch stood Cregan’s dog, barely visible in the early morning gloom. Frosty barked again, hopped down the steps, and turned to look at her expectantly.
He wanted her to follow him.
“Hold on, buddy, let me grab my shoes,” she promised, her voice a mix of anxiety and sleepiness. She hurriedly slipped on her shoes, her mind racing. What if something had happened to Cregan? Was this a “dog leads the way to an emergency” situation? With a quick grab of her hoodie, she went after the dog. Frosty was checking over his shoulder to make sure she was keeping up.
In no time, they arrived at Cregan’s house. The door was slightly ajar, and her heart raced as she stepped inside.
“Cregan?” she called out hesitantly.
“Yeah?” came his voice from the right, and she nearly jumped out of her skin.
Cregan Stark stood by the kitchen counter, looking mildly confused with a steaming cup of coffee in hand. He was clad only in gray sweatpants, the silver wolf pendant around his neck glinting in the soft light.
“Are you okay?” she blurted out, still trying to catch her breath.
“Feeling great. Want some coffee?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.
(Y/N) pulled out a chair and plopped down, staring at Frosty, who was wagging his tail like he had just saved the day.
“Am I a joke to you?” Frosty tilted his head, giving her an innocent look. "He came to my door like some heroic rescue dog. I thought—” She sighed, running a hand through her messy hair. “I thought something had happened to you. I figured you’d, I don’t know, passed out or something. I’m pretty sure I just aged ten years.”
Cregan cast a side glance at Frosty, lips twitching as he tried to keep a straight face. "Frosty, man, what’s the deal?” he asked the dog, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips.
(Y/N) narrowed her eyes. “This is not funny.”
“You really got that worried?” 
“Yes! And here you are, in perfect shape. Alive,” she muttered, her eyes trailing over his very much alive form, pausing on his very defined abs. “And half-naked. I might cry.”
That did it—Cregan turned away quickly, but she saw the grin he was trying to hide as he moved to make her coffee.
“Should I put on a shirt?” he asked, a little more serious now, glancing back over his shoulder. “If it bothers you.”
“No, you’ve got some nice muscles on your back,” she blurted out without thinking. Frosty rested his head on her knee, looking up at her with his big eyes. “And you,” she added, giving the dog a playful glare, “are lucky you’re cute.”
Cregan placed the mug in front of her.
“Thanks for the compliment,” he said with a smirk.
“Thanks for the coffee,” she replied, feeling the tension melt a little.
Cregan sat across from her, watching her for a moment, an unreadable expression on his face.
“You look good,” he said finally, sounding genuine. “Want some breakfast?”
Suddenly, it hit her. She was here, no makeup, hair a mess, and still in her pajama pants. She cringed, remembering her earlier comment about his fucking back.
“Uh, no, I’m good,” she mumbled, suddenly self-conscious.
“Dinner, then? Later. With me. I know a place. If you’d like, of course,” Cregan suggested quickly, his tone slightly tentative.
(Y/N)’s eyes widened in surprise. Was he... blushing?
“Are you asking me out?”
He let out a soft laugh. “I’ve been trying to ask you out since the first time I saw you. Not sure if you noticed,” he admitted. Just then, Frosty went up to him and nudged the owner’s hand with his nose. “Oh, great, emotional support,” Cregan muttered, scratching the dog’s head affectionately.
(Y/N) couldn’t help but chuckle, shaking her head in disbelief. “Yes.”
“Yes?” he echoed, hopeful.
“Yes,” she affirmed, her heart racing. “Just let me know what time, and I’ll dress up.”
He flashed her that charming grin, but then his expression shifted. “I’ve got an appointment with a chihuahua that bites people. I’m actually not sure if I’m gonna make it.”
She liked him so much.
“Do you think it’d be alright if I kissed you before the date, Cregan?” 
“Oh, please do,” Stark replied, voice and expression desperate.
Without overthinking it, she ended up sitting on his lap, being kissed like there was no tomorrow. Held by the strongest pair of arms that were also so gentle.
Frosty placed an approving paw on Cregan’s leg.
Well done, human.
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filmbyjy · 3 days
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ONE NOTE
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SYNOPSIS > When you turned 18, you heard your best friend’s favourite song. Turns out, it was just one of the various signs to finding your soulmate. However, you couldn’t bring this up to jake. Not when he was in a happy relationship with your other best friend! Would you choose heartbreak or sacrifice your happiness for the sake of keeping the friendship?
EIGHTEEN – the first petal
MASTERLIST | PREVIOUS | NEXT
a/n: please note there is a written part after these 6 pictures!! don't forget to read it because it is part of something important.
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“breathe.” yvette says as she pats your back. it was suffocating. the sink was bloodied up, splatters of blood that you had coughed up in a span of 5 minutes. mae runs in with a bottle in her hands.
“here, drink up.” she quickly opens the bottle up and hands it over to you. you took the bottle and quickly drank it.
“why didn’t you tell us it was this bad. we obviously knew that jake was your soulmate but we didn’t think that your body would react this way.” yvette looks at you.
“you’d honestly think that this disease would be a mythical thing but it is very much true.” mae says. you felt the tears fall down your face. yvette wipes them for you. she looks at you with such pity and such care.
“man, fuck that bitch.” she declares. “making such a sexy girl cry? not very girl’s girl coded of her.”
“she doesn’t know. i don’t think jake would tell her. besides, he doesn’t even know i’m his soulmate.”
“well, i think she would find out either ways. she’s such a weirdo.” mae huffs. yvette nods.
“what are you going to do?” yvette asks.
“live with it.”
“but you’re going to cough out blood if you keep seeing them so loving and disgusting.”
“it’s okay. once it gets worse, i’ll just get the surgery.”
“to remove your feelings? (name), you can’t seriously be thinking of doing this.” mae sighs. “i’ve seen people decide to go through with the surgery, they aren’t like themselves. once you do it, there will also be complications in the end. you won’t live for long.”
“there is no other way. if end up dead then so be it. i can’t let jake know. he’s very much in love with aria. he would never love me.” you sobbed. yvette pulls you closer and keeps you in her arms.
“hey hey, let’s not talk about death. you’re alive and well right now. let’s live your life to the fullest and make the best out of it. you aren’t dying.” she mutters. mae grabs your hand and lightly squeezes it.
“yeah, who cares about jake and aria. you have sunghoon, your friends, your brother and us. we are there for you.”
you were thankful for the people who were close to you. you had wiped your tears and nodded. “you’re right.”
there were a series of knocks at the bathroom door. yvette rolls her eyes and opens the door. “we’re having a sentimental moment here.”
“sorry, girls. just checking in to see if (name) is okay.” jay says.
“that or are you already missing mae?” yvette folds her arms. jay awkwardly laughs a little.
“maybe but i’m more concerned for my best friend of course.” you laughed a little and sniffled. you pushed mae forward towards jay.
“take her oh my god. you find out she’s your soulmate and you can’t stop being away from her.”
jay shrugs. sunghoon steps forward and hugs you.
"I'm not dying, hoon."
"just let me hug you. you need it." he says. your smile falters a little. "you can cry, you know?"
"i already cried just now."
"and? you can cry again and I wouldn't judge."
"I know you won't, hoon."
your brother comes up to you. "okay, break it up. can I hug my sister?"
sunghoon lets you go, and leehan easily replaces him. "when did you get so big?"
"I've always been big." he says. you laughed.
"okay, but you're my baby brother."
"yes, i am." you ruffled his hair and he pulls back from the hug.
"let's go back. those two are probably wondering where we are." taesan says.
"the last i saw them they were making out-" *whack* ni-ki winces when sun whacks him.
"don't even mention that." sunoo warns.
"right, sorry noona." ni-ki pouts. you sighed a little.
"it's fine, ni-ki."
you could see jake and aria coming closer to the group. jake was mainly concerned about everyone but aria...she's just kinda following jake.
"hey, why is everyone gathering around here?" jake asks.
"oh, there was a slight mishap so (name) called the girls over. we were worried so we waited outside for them." heeseung explains.
"you could've told us."
"yeah, but you were busy making out with aria so we didn't want to bother the both of you." sunghoon says. there was a petty tone underlying as he tells jake.
"what the fuck is your problem?" jake comes up to sunghoon. sunghoon scoffs.
"nothing."
"nothing? you said that the other time and then you went on a tangent hating on my girlfriend." jake folds his arms.
sunghoon rolls his eyes. "well, I'm right either ways. you were sooooo oblivious and busy with aria that even when (name) got hurt or had an issue you didn't care."
"she's fine now, isn't she? you guys took good care of her. she's in good hands, so i trust you guys to care for her. after all, I'm just her best friend and I am busy with my girlfriend. You don't understand me because you don't have a girlfriend!" jake yells at sunghoon.
you start to cough up again. this time when you look down at your hand, not only was there blood but there was a petal. the first petal to have ever appeared. you had looked up to see everyone staring at you. jake's jaw dropped when he saw the blood in your palms.
you didn't know what else to do other than run away. sunghoon glared at jake once more before he runs after you.
this was moving too fast...
were you dying?
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cezqstar · 2 days
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haven’t been active in the rykter fandom in awhile, but i’ve seen quite a lot of opinions floating around on here & twt that i had quite a lot of thoughts about!
someone said the show is queerbaiting… and i genuinely cannot believe how anyone can see a character figuring out his queer identity and only see the matherik ship & dumb it down to queerbaiting.
edit: i want to clarify this part i said on queerbaiting because i didn’t articulate my thoughts in depth. at the end of season 2, mathias initiated a kiss with erik ultimately implying his queer identity. and his season 3 storyline has confirmed him as a queer character, who is crushing on erik & struggling with acceptance whilst getting bullied by his ex-best friend. however, erik’s pov is open to interpretation, which leaves a lot of space for fan theories (that i eat tf up) but at the moment, that’s all they are. fan theories. erik’s actions can be interpreted as both platonic & non-platonic, and i don’t see the show dangling matherik in the audiences faces. since they’re very focused on mathias’ story and his perspective rather than erik’s. whose own story seems to focus on him hanging around the wrong crowd and his questionable behaviour. it leaves the storyline open to go down two very different routes: erik could have his own queer realisation and the two of them eventually end up together. or mathias’ has unrequited feelings for his straight (or aro 👀) friend but those feelings helped him with his own queer journey to acceptance. and i think with how they’ve set erik up, it could genuinely go either way and make sense.
^^ that’s why i believe the queerbaiting claims are a stretch.
it’s become very clear why people began watching rykter: matherik. but people NEED to remember that the show is not solely about them. it never has been. this show is about the chaotic lives of ‘sheltered’ (i can’t think of the word i’m after) teenagers who all have the capability to be stupid, immature and selfish. which yes, includes felix as one of those characters and yes, includes erik as a teenager capable of being a bad person at times.
these teenagers are also all (well almost all) capable of redemption. mathias has proved his own ability to be redeemed after his s1 antics, erik will surely have his own redemption path regarding his current s3 antics and thea is currently having her redemption this season. just because erik has been generally good in the first two seasons, doesn’t mean he isn’t prone to poor decision making & shitty actions. remember: they’re all 15-16 years old.
i’ve seen a few people suggest that the rykter writers are ‘getting off’ on or ‘enjoying’ the homophobic abuse that mathias has been subjected to, but i think that’s a massive stretch. and an extremely poor outlook on the shows writing in my opinion. many people forget that even though norway is a progressive country that homophobic shitheads still exist. and the way mathias is being treated by someone as horrible as felix & no one saying anything due to being ‘sheltered’ followers is quite real.
and when someone as jealous, hateful & spiteful as felix who clearly puts up with his own share of prejudice gets to put someone else down (someone who he also feels ‘betrayed’ by), he’ll jump at that opportunity in an attempt to make himself better and stronger. from victim -> perpetrator. i understand the frustration around this season focusing on felix quite a lot but people need to stop seeing his storyline as ways to ‘excuse’ his actions and moreso to explain them & simply SHOW his life. they seem pretty hellbent on showing you that he’s a shitty person regardless of his home life & personal issues.
anyways rant over! time to disappear again lol. feel free to disagree with anything i said. always happy to have a discussion!
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linopilled · 1 day
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⟡ cw: perverted behavior from our seungminnie. :* hyperfeminine reader is alluded to being a ditz. panty sniffing & stealing. creepshot mention (underskirt photos! yippee!) no actual smut, just some choice words & lil masturbation mentions (m&f). minors dni, i'm trigger happy with the block button. (:
⟡ a/n: idk what happened man. but do tell me if you like this .. i may write more! ^_^;
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roommate!seungmin has a rather strange infatuation.
when he has your pretty pink panties pressed against his nose and he desperately needs a release due to all the stress he's under, it's like he can't help himself. and it's so fucking filthy, but he loves it. especially when they're used — your sweet scent being the only thing that can get him off nowadays.
sure, he likely shouldn't be stealing your panties nightly and sniffing them, or wrapping them around his cock and using them like a fleshlight whilst he desperately tugs at his cock and imagines it's your tight cunt milking him dry given the two of you have never crossed any less than platonic lines, but he simply can't help it. he hopes you'll find out and call him a desperate dog; a depraved pervert.
it'll only make him fuck you harder when he finally gets his hands on you.
he's been jerking his cock nightly like he hasn't had a hand on it in months. his thoughts are plagued with nothing but ideas of how bad he wants to render you into nothing but a teary eyed and whiny mess like his life depends on it. it's torture living with you, really. you prancing around in the skimpiest attire and inviting your boytoys over at night when you think he's not home, the soft buzz of your vibrator and hushed whines through thin walls when you're lonely and frustrated, and your constant touchiness with him plaguing every fiber of his being.
he thinks today might be the day he finally loses it.
you're bent over and looking into your dresser drawer, wearing that satin babydoll dress he loves so much. rummaging around with a frustrated noise, and oh so positive that you had just washed laundry, and put your underwear away a few nights ago.
“dude, my panties are going missing. have they been mixed up with your laundry?” you ask, turning to him looking doe-eyed and clueless. it's enough to make his cock twitch in his sweatpants.
the question does startle him a bit, however, a flushed pink tone creeping up his cheeks when you bring it up, and you chalk it up to him being shy at the fact that you're so upfront about your intimate garments. he feigns nonchalance, looking down at his phone and pretending to be interested at what twitter has to offer.
“isn’t that something?” seungmin finally answers, looking towards you and hoping that you hadn’t noticed the slight flush painting his cheeks. “sorry, i haven’t seen ‘em.” he blatantly lies. “i could look, though.” he trails off, getting up and walking out of your room, and into his own. a relieved sigh escapes his mouth the minute he's alone, and he shoves his hand into his pocket and pulls out his favorite pair on you — the ones he'd taken so many underskirt photos of you in, giving the fabric a quick inhale and shuddering out a breathy moan before stashing them beneath his pillow.
“fuck, i swear i’ll never get enough of how good her scent is.” seungmin murmurs to himself.
yeah, maybe his infatuation is odd, but he fucking loves the feeling of it.
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bug-84 · 1 year
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sometimes (everyday) im worried that im dying of a terrible and rare illness but also then sometimes i realize 16 year old me wouldnt have been scared and it makes me feel okay again
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moinsbienquekaworu · 2 months
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I just spent like 20 minutes thinking about soup
#i need to move out!!!!#i love my parents to be clear they're great#i just want to be in charge of my own meals again#it's not that they're bad at feeding me stuff i want to eat it's just we like different things#when it's just me i can make my soup however i want and no one's gonna say anything#Because It's My Soup#i can eat japanese chicken curry for a week straight! no one cares!#i just need to get better at eating vegetables#i want my own kitchen soooo baaad.....#my mom's sensitive to garlic. do you know how much recipes fuck if you add garlic? severely. and i can't if she's gonna eat it#i need my own kitchen so bad so so bad pleeaase#really hoping that i get my degree within like two months#and then i have to. urgh. find a job. but then i find a job and i go there#and i get Paid! money!#and once i have some money in the bank and a long term job i can try and get a flat#and once i have a flat i have my own kitchen i can order stuff online if i want and i can adopt a cat#i can have friends over i can decorate#and if i can swing it i'll be a civil servant#and if i'm lucky enough i can perhaps. give up the next 30 years of my life to a bank so i can own my own flat#god i hope. i fucking hope. i really really want to own#like not for landlord bullshit. just so i don't have to worry about where to go in a year two years five years#i want a civil servant job because that's for life and i would love to do the same thing forever#and i want to own a flat because i could make the space fit my needs and wants perfectly#and i wouldn't have to worry about where to live or old age or whatever#good luck to me finding a well situated 2 bedroom flat in one of the if not the worst city of france in terms of housing :)#but hey i've been lucky in life. maybe it'll keep going#i know what i want early! that's good#i shouldn't have a realisation that i want kids at 30yo or whatever. I Shall Not Become My Mom#ANYWAY i need my own kitchen!!!!!#wow i have a ramble tag now
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urmomsstuntdouble · 9 months
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not to be political but I've seen a lot of people saying that those who call Israel an apartheid don't know what they're talking about and um. As someone who has studied South African apartheid as well as grown up in a Jewish community. This claim has more merit than you think
#this post is brought to you by an article i read “debunking” the claim that israel is an apartheid and their “evidence”#included several policies that are the same if not more intense than apartheid era policies against black south africans#there are comparisons that hold weight here#although one thing i dont get and havent had explained to me yet. it looks to me as though both arabs and jews are indigenous to the region#in the way that both the hopewell culture and lenape people are indigenous to my state of pennsylvania#and thats a flimsy comparison i suppose since the hopewell culture (who lived here first chronologically) has died out#but anyway theres a case for indigeneity for both jews and arabs#its so silly to me that we dont consider both to be indigenous? yes many jews that came into israel in the early 20th century were#white europeans and carried the colonial baggage of that with them#but idk why its so hard to believe that an oppressed group can also be an oppressor?? like where's the intersectionality babes#anyway. the original point of this post was that maybe more of yall need to look into what south african apartheid was actually like#much like h*m*s leadership a lot of the ANC leadership was forced into exile and had to live and work outside of their country#(and this comparison is not perfect im aware. the tactics of the anc and h*m*s are totally different. however i think this comparison has#weight in that they are both one of the biggest names in opposition to the government. they do this in different ways at different levels o#intensity and violence. that is not to be ignored. but there are some comparisons that we can make and exile doesnt strike me as a bad one)#the bantustans in south africa were also constructed in a way that much like the west bank makes it highly difficult for an actual real#state to form#and the way that theyre set up invites puppet governments and corruption. this gives a major advantage to the apartheid state#id recommend reading Trevor Noah's Born A Crime if you havent#its a great introduction to what daily life in aparthid and after was like (its a memoir from about 1990-2005ish)#(apartheid was legally ended in 1994 but there are still remnants of it today and there were even more at the time of Born a Crime)#anyway these are my political thoughts of the day#edit: to my tangent about both groups being able to have some sort of claim to indigeneity. that in no way justifies any of the brutality#going on#i think its espeically cringe of israel to claim indigeneity and a sacred relationship with the land then create an environmental#catastrophe like they have in gaza. making the land unliveable is a bit of a perversion of the relationship you have with that land innit#in case it wasnt clear: ceasefire now and free palestine
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piplupod · 3 months
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this girl at the centre is rly frivolous with her spending and it's driving me fucking insane because she complains about having no money but then somehow buys DQ lunch every day (a meal there is like $10+ ????) and buys a s.quishmallow or brand new fancy-covered book (not just paperbacks... the ones w embossed covers and cool stuff like that) or other fairly expensive trinkets almost daily ???? and then treats me like I'm being a party pooper if I decline buying food from DQ myself or if I say that I cannot afford some random thing that she tells me I should buy 🧍<- shaking with barely concealed frustrated irritation and tears
#I DONT HAVE AN ISSUE W PPL SPENDING MONEY HOWEVER THEY LIKE#I HAVE AN ISSUE WHEN THEY MAKE ME FEEL BAD ABOUT /MY/ FINANCIAL CHOICES THOUGH#OR IF THEY COMPLAIN TO ME ABOUT HAVING NO MONEY#GIRL MAYBE U NEED TO STOP SPENDING IT THEN. PLEASE MAKE SMARTER CHOICES.#i already feel so fucking ashamed of having zero income (literally zero except when i catsit every few months for the neighbour 🙃)#and i already feel awful for being a penny pincher but if i spend anything frivolously then im going to run out of the savings i earned#the savings i earned by not spending any money as a teen and being employed since grade 8. i worked hard for that shit.#and i would like to not run out of it sooner than I absolutely have to bc ... i will have to kms at that point fhdjdkl#if I can't get onto welfare and then disability i will not be able to live bc I'll have no fucking money 😭😭#SO LET ME PINCH MY PENNIES PLEASEEEEE I'd like to be able to fight to get onto welfare before i run out of money !!!!#ITS JUST RLY FUCKING HARD having to just. have her treat me this way.#when its like. life or death for me. and she doesnt even have to buy groceries or pay rent. jfc man#i just. its unfair. it is really so unfair. im so tired of being unable to buy little treats fhfkdl#i dont think ppl are bad for buying little treata but i am incredibly envious !!!! im glad other ppl can do so but i wish i could too !!!#its just so frustrating and humiliating when she tries to invite me to Money Spending Activities and i have to say no#and then she treats me like im a party pooper for it. PLEASEEEE I AM FUCKING POOR !!!!#pippen needs 2nd breakfast
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anarkhebringer · 10 months
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I like how I said a while back that my Astarion origin run was gonna be him doing the act 3 thoughts about his actions but with his act 1 sass and power hunger, but now that I made him trans my brain is trying to apply that special transmasc Rage onto him
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sk3l3t0n444 · 10 months
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i wanna play animal crossing but i get really stressed about the amount of stuff i can do and how i dont know what i should do and it always reminds me that i should be working on shit :(
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pepprs · 11 months
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like i hesitate to make this comparison when i don’t actually have the condition and god willing never ever will but it’s like with c*vid how sometimes it alters your tastebuds forever and everything you once loved tastes rotten. that’s exactly what this is like. and it fucking sucks
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hirokiyuu · 2 years
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(ripping my hair out by the handful) Sol Is Not Trapped In The Time Loop Sol Is There Because They Choose To Be
#life on earth i am begging you please get life on earth#teenexo stuff#this is my biggest adn pettiest pet peeve but every time a fic is tagged fix it abt either#a) sol leaving the time loop or#b) dys not [redacted]#i start ripping out my hair. please. please. please#the irony is besk lives au actually does hit point b eventually however. however#i dont think its a fix it for him to do it or not do it i think its just a choice he can choose to make#i really do honestly and genuinely believe its fine and morally neutral and not a bad thing#i dont think relationships need to last forever to be deep and meaningful and i think dys staying for sol for so long is already like#a sign of his love and how much he cares for them. like. i think its fine. i genuinely do think its fine that he goes#idk theres a quote from this book i really like thats smth like uhhh#your lover doesnt belong to you they are choosing to lend themself to you every day#and i think abt that w/rt dys/sol a lot its just good u kno#dys stays for sol because he loves them. he leaves because he wants to do that too#and i think the act of him staying bc he loves them is really nice! having the time together they have is nice!#idk i also dont think sol would be able to be like....... With dys long term if they didnt understand/acknowledge this at least a little?#basically. i think there are circumstances where dys wouldn't do it but i dont think those are fix-its lol#ANYWAYS clambers back off my soap box#this wasnt even what i came here to complain about#ok back to packing byeeeeeee#i was a teenage exocolonist spoilers ?#probably somewhere in there im guessing
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tchaikovskym · 1 year
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My advisor wants me to go work for them as a lab assistant, but the salary is two times lower than my current one. I want to cry.
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snarltoothed · 1 year
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i need to be in a female separatist psych ward but alas they don’t exist! and as such i will continue being a problem
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minhoinator · 2 years
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i'm getting anxious asldkjfa
#okay so idk if i've talked about my current situation much#lived in one place for seven years; despised it but didn't have the funds to move#my living situation went to shit and i saw no feasible way out aside from taking my aunt up on her offer of moving in#with her and my grandma indefinitely (aka until i could find a new job and afford to move out again)#did this so i could focus on finishing my school work and also move to this side of the state because fuck eastern WA tbh#but....now that i'm here......#like it's nice living rent free atm especially considering there is no cashflow#however.............................#they're both extremely conservative; which is a choice but okay; religious; and homophobic (and frequently make homophobic comments)#also they have three chihuahuas of varying levels of derangement so i'm just having the time of my life here#first of all they all poop and pee in the house at wild abandon. the number of times i've stepped in it at this point is...too many#rat dog number 1: has the most annoying bark/whine combo i've ever heard and she starts the other rats on a chain reaction#rat dog number 2: actively eats the other dog's shit and like they do occasionally clean up after their dogs but???#they also just leave paper towels covering the mess until they want to take the time to actually clean it up#rat dog number 3: is a special case. i feel sorta bad bitching about him because he was abused and raised in a meth home so like...#he's special needs but that doesn't mean he can't also be annoying#he makes a lot of the messes and also he will run around in tight circles barking for up to 15 minutes at a time#also all three of them have fleas AND GAVE THEM TO MY DOG but they won't do much of anything about it so anything i try to do for Frodo#is basically pointless#and this isn't even getting into the cooking...my aunt has like idk 40+ ingredients she's allergic to and my grandma#can't eat a lot of foods and they expect me to cook for them because i went to culinary school once upon a time#i'm tired#on top of all this; they live out in the boonies; which wouldn't be that bad of a thing because i like being up in the mountains/forest#however#I don't want to be trapped here during the winter with them because i think i would lose my grip on the fraying threads of my sanity#so i was looking for a job in town#applied to a bunch of places; got one in Portland; which is a little over an hour drive away from me atm#now; i've always wanted to live in OR; so i'm jumping on this opportunity to move#but since it's a new job; i don't have the pay stubs to apply for an apartment#and rent is so fucking high right now
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