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missjadesfics · 2 months

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"Sandstorms aren't all that bad."

Feyd-Rautha x Reader gif credits: @pedropcl dividers: @cafekitsune @rookthornesartistry Request: Yes Summary: When Feyd-Rautha and Y/n are stuck in a cave during a sandstorm on Arrakis, they both confess their feelings for one another and find a way to pass the time. Warnings: smut, breeding kink, dry humping, creampie, ink-pie, feyd in love, rough sex, soft!feyd, rough!feyd during sex, marking Word Count: 2k Disclaimer: I don't own Dune or its characters, nor do I claim them as my own. Comments likes, and reblogs are always adored and appreciated xx

edited: 10th june

Feyd monitored the spice harvesting on Arrakis carefully, his eyes watching intently; he heard the large doors open, and his head looked over his shoulder slightly. A smirk danced on his lips, eating some fruit from his knife; he spun around, blue eyes falling on her figure. “Y/n, my darling, you’ve finally arrived. How do you like my Arrakis?” He gestured with his arms wide, a broad grin on his face Y/n swayed her body, her eyes taking in the room around her. “Your Arrakis is beautiful, my lord Na-Baron. I’d love to see more. Would you indulge me?” Y/n gave him a sultry look. Feyd tilted his head, his eyes raking over her body, tongue darting out to lick his lips. “But of course, what kind of governor of Arrakis would I be if I didn’t show my darling all its beauty? Come beautiful girl” His hand grasped hers, leading them to the Ornithopters; he lifted Y/n inside before climbing in and sitting beside her, starting the giant flying machine and taking them into the sky. Y/n admired the vast barren lands below. Feyd would often look over, a smile gracing his face. An alarm began to sound, alerting Feyd of an upcoming sandstorm. Y/n looked at Feyd with a worried expression. “What is happening, Feyd?”

The Harkonnen grunted in annoyance, looking for somewhere to land. “We have to find some safe to stay until all this passes. We will never make it back to Arrakeen through the sandstorm.” Feyd finds a large rock formation amongst the dunes, landing the ornithopter safely inside the cavern covering the cave entrance to protect them. Feyd helped grab Y/n’s body, placing her on the sand; the two looked around as Feyd scouted the small cave. “It looks safe enough, no sign of any rats.” Feyd’s raspy voice echoed Y/n sat down, her legs crossed. Feyd sat beside her. “How long do sandstorms last here on Arrakis?”

Y/n asked gently. Feyd shrugged his shoulders. “It varies on the storm’s severity; Arrakis is known for its hostility. Do not worry; it shouldn’t be long” Feyd prepared something for them to sleep in, gathering items from the ornithopter Y/n watched how resourceful and quickly Feyd had set everything up. “We will have to sleep in here together, and exposure to spices will affect our health. I have the equipment to make sure we will be alright.” Feyd explained Y/n nodded, listening to him. Her mind was entranced by his voice, his words, his eyes. Everything about him made her heart race; her thoughts were constantly occupied with him. In her dreams, she wanted him, and he wanted her; he had made his desire for her evident, but he never made his move. Y/n thought he didn’t feel anything for her anymore whenever they were alone. Feyd would speak sweet nothings in her ear; his lips would brush her pulse on her neck. But Feyd protected her from his Uncle; Y/n would be in danger daily while his Uncle breathed. With every retched breath that the older man took, he would plot to kill Y/n. Feyd couldn’t stomach the idea of losing her. So he would always love her but keep her at a distance; now he was Na-Baron, and his role in House Harkonnen has changed; he is now in a position where he has more power. Even so, over his Uncle, if he plays his cards right, he could overthrow him and take the title of Baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen. And Y/n, she would be his Baroness.

Hours passed, and the sandstorm showed no signs of releasing its hold on the barren land. The sand and wind grip was too powerful for it to be a one-day storm. Feyd and Y/n lay under the protective shelter, hearing the wind howl. Y/n and Feyd lay facing one another, their soft breaths drowned out by the raging storm around them. Feyd had his arm draped loosely over Y/n’s waist, his face an inch away from hers. Feyd’s eyes often opened to ensure Y/n was okay, his blue eyes studying her face. Y/n looked peaceful; she always was in his presence. His ache for her continued to grow over their growing up; Y/n was a high born like Feyd, and his uncle, the Baron, had what surprised many in the imperium: a great friendship with Y/n’s father—both as cunning and strategic as each other which made them both brutal pairing. Feyd may have scoffed at his uncle’s friendship, but in that friendship, he gained Y/n. Since childhood, Feyd and Y/n were inseparable; Feyd always kept close, serving as a protection shield. Never let any man near her, let alone touch her. Feyd believed the only man with such privilege should be him and him alone. And typically, whatever the Na-Baron wants, he gets.

Y/n felt eyes upon her, causing her body to stir. Her eyes opened, seeing Feyd give a warm smile. “Feyd,” her voice was full of sleep; the Harkonnen brushed his knuckles along her cheek. “Y/n,” he whispered back, his lips quirked into a slight smirk; his voice sent shivers through her body. “Do you feel anything for me?” She asked Feyd, her fingers touching his cheek softly. Feyd’s eyes closed at the touch, breathing deeply; his hand fell on hers. His lips brushed her wrist Y/n’s lips parted slightly, watching Feyd her heart racing. Feyd moved her hand off his face and laid it back down. “Go to sleep; this storm doesn’t sound like it is clearing soon; we might be stuck here for some time” “ he murmured, his eyes falling closed once again Y/n blinked back tears as she turned to face her back to him. Trying not to cry, she slowly fell back asleep.

When morning came, Y/n heard movement behind Feyd’s hand on her shoulder, waking her gently. “The storm has passed, and we must return to Arrakeen before another storm comes.” Feyd sat on his knees as he gathered everything. Y/n stood and raked her fingers through her hair, looking down at Feyd. “Why do you do this?” She questioned him, and her tone made his heart freeze. His head turned to face her, his eyes narrowed. “Why do I do what?” He counter-asked Y/n and crossed her arms. “Lure me in, with sweet words, the brush of your hands against mine. You act like you love me or you desire me, but then you push me away. I want to know why,” Y/n told him as Feyd stood, his blue eyes eyeing her with a glint of amusement. His tongue swiping his lips, Y/n walked towards him.

“I know how I feel about you, and I may be stupid to think you feel the same. But I know you, Feyd-Rautha, you let your guard down around me. You are not the fearsome Na-Baron that everyone cowers before. So, if you even think about backing out on me now, I’ll make you regret it until your last breath”, Y/n panted heavily. Feyd smirked, pushing her against the wall, his body pressed to hers. Y/n let out a small moan at the contact as Feyd leaned in close, his breath fanning her face, his lips dangerously close to hers. “Beautiful girl, if you want me to fuck you until you can’t walk. I want to hear those words leave those pretty lips. Tell me you want me to claim you as mine so no other man can have you. I will do so, and I’ll make sure everyone can see just how much of a needy girl you are for me. And show that you belong to me, as I belong to you. So, let me hear you beg for me. And I’ll fulfil your every desire” He grinned, his ink-black teeth bared, making Y/n weak in the knees and her arousal pool in between her thighs, dripping down her legs. Fuck him. Fuck him. Fuck him…God, I want to fuck him. She thought, cupping his face and pressing his lips to his passionately, both moaning into the kiss.

Feyd’s hand gripped her waist, his hands digging into her skin. Y/n gasped, Feyd’s tongue invading her mouth “Feyd”, Y/n breathed his name, making the Harkonnen groan, pulling away from the kiss, his eyes closed. Pressing his head to hers, he cupped her cheek. “I love it when you say my name. So pretty,” He murmured Y/n kissed his jaw, whispering in his ear, “Feyd” Feeling him remove her still suit, he moved her away from the wall and laid her on the blanket on the ground. His hips rocked against hers, and the roughness of his still suit rubbing on her silk undergarments made her whine underneath him.

Grinning like a madman, Y/n stared into Feyd’s blue eyes, darkened with lust. Y/n’s body glistened with sweat, the rising heat from the dunes surrounding them, as well as the heat blooming from their bodies writhing in pleasure. Feyd grunted, his hips rutting faster Y/n’s legs wrapped around his waist, her back arched. “Feyd” “ she cried, her hands holding onto his arms. Feyd panted, snarling; his fingers ripped her last piece of fabric, his thumb rubbing her swollen pearl, making her body jolt. Looking down, seeing her pussy convulse as her white cum leaked out between her thighs, coating his still suit. Feyd chuckled, unbuckling his still suit pants and removing his hard cock from its confines, rolling Y/n onto her stomach.

Pulling her back by her hips, Feyd leant over her body, kissing her shoulder and neck. “Remember you asked for this beautiful girl? Are you sure you want it?” Feyd’s raspy voice made her nod, and her head hung forward, moaning; looking behind her, she gazed into his eyes. “Please, Feyd, I’ve wanted this for so long” “ she begged him. Feyd’s eyes softened at her plea and he kissed her lips softly before entering her in one harsh thrust. Their sounds of loud moans and skin slapping echoed in the small cave. Feyd wasted no time in thrusting into her hard, her velvet walls sucking him in greedily, making him laugh. Y/n’s whines and moans spurred Feyd to fuck her into the ground with no mercy. She wanted him to fuck her and claim her, then he’ll give her what she wants. “Y/n, my love, you were made for me. No other man will have you; I’ve always ensured that. I’ve loved you for as long as I can remember. You have always been mine, as I’ve always been yours.”

Y/n gasped, feeling his cock hit her sweet spot; her walls clenched at his words. You have always been mine, as I’ve always been yours. Feyd did love her; he admitted it; he shared her feelings Y/n felt tears brim in her eyes as Feyd pulled out of her and flipped her onto her back. He re-entered her Y/n’s body moulded into his as if they were made for each other. Locking eyes, both letting out shuddering breaths, Y/n wrapped her legs around his waist. Feyd kissed her neck, the sheer force of his thrusts leaving Y/n breathless. Writhing underneath, she felt her second climax approaching; a string of broken moans and cries told Feyd she was close. “Are you close, beautiful girl, hmm?” He purred, kissing her lips, tongue licking her lips, and teeth scraping her bottom lip. He could feel her walls throbbing around his cock; his eyes closed, his head hung forward Y/n let out a loud gasp feeling her body shudder and her thighs jolt at the orgasmic pleasure spreading through her body. “Feyd, please” “ she begged to kiss his neck. “I want to fill me up, mark me”, She moaned as Feyd growled, his teeth latching onto her neck and biting harshly as he came inside her filling her with his hot ink-black cum. Y/n sobbed, her body arching into his chest, the lovers breathing heavily; their eyes looked between Y/n’s thighs stained with black. Feyd smirked as he licked his lips at her slightly widened eyes.

“You begged me and wanted to be claimed, so I did it. I claimed you.”

sdt: @valeskafics @austinbutlermischief @feydsociety @austinbutlerslovers @austinstyles @lady-phasma @barbiedragon @abswifey

#smut #dune part two #austin butler #feyd rautha #oneshots #feyd rautha x reader #request #my fic #missjadesfics #feyd rautha x reader smut

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llovelyclouds · 10 months

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notes on alecto

hii!! so a few months ago i did a full reread of the locked tomb and took note of anything i thought seemed particularly relevant. I want to share what I have but I'm not sure exactly how i want to format everything quite yet- but im just gonna go for it so bear with me if its a little disorganized!

throughout the process i've started coming up with some of my own theories, but i thought it would be cool to post everything i've compiled, so people could use that to make their own conclusions as well :D

I have sections for anything that seemed important about all the original lyctors & their cavaliers, so I'm going to start off with all my information gathered about alecto! buckle in, folks, there's a lot :-)

you can find links to the other posts in the project here!

(also ofc spoilers for the up to the end of nona ahead!)

ALECTO

titles:

Also referred to as “A.L.”, “Annabel Lee,”or “Annie Laurie” John’s cavalier, the soul of the Earth. (And of course, nona <;3)

Annabel Lee poem (mentioned htn. pg. 196)

Annie Laurie poem (mentioned htn. pg. 345)

notes from harrow the ninth:

Harrow's psychosis seems to begin after seeing Alecto for the first time (htn. pg. 51)

Augustine describes her as "more lucid" than Mercy as an insult to Mercy (htn. pg 168)

"'God, who did you bury?' [...] 'I buried a monster,' he said." (htn. pg. 195)

(depending on how much of The Body is real) Agrees that Harrow should kill G1dieon (htn. pg. 226)

“Augustine said, ‘To sisters, and to the women we‘ve left behind.’ God’s mouth was cheerful as ever, but his eyes were not when he said, 'Do I have to drink to that?’ For the first time, you were witness to the Saint of Patience discombobulated. ‘Apologies, John. Wasn’t meant as a jab.’ ‘It doesn’t hurt anymore- most of the time,’ said God, and he was still smiling.” (htn. Pg. 277)

"Even the devil bent for God to put a leash around her neck… and the disciples were scared! I cannot blame them! I was terrified! But when the work was done- when I was finished, and so were they, and the new Lyctors found out the price- they bade him kill the saltwater creature before she could do them harm… Oh, but it is a tragedy, to be put in a box and laid to wait for the rest of time." - Teacher (htn. pg. 328)

Says she has to go away for a while immediately after Varun appears (htn. pg. 334)

John says that G1deon doesn’t talk about her, but Augustine and Mercy still feel guilty about what happened (htn. pg. 345)

“When I first met her I just called her First, One. She had a real name, but I buried it with her, and nobody says it anymore.” - John (htn. Pg. 345)

“Annabel Lee was my- what do I call her? Guide? Friend? I’d hope so… [...] She was the first Resurrection. She was my Adam. As the dust settled and I beheld what was left and what was gone, I was entirely alone. The world had been ended, Harrowhark. One moment I was a man, and the next moment I was the Necrolord Prime, the first necromancer, and more importantly, a landlord with no tenants. [...] I was dazed… I was bewildered… and she was my defender and my sole companion, and my colleague in the scholarship of learning how to live again. It was bloody difficult. I had never been God. [...] She lived to see what happened at Canaan House. Not that she took much interest. My first Resurrection was not a normal human being, Harrow, and she struggled to pretend. Anger was her besetting sin. We had that in common. And when the cost of Lyctorhood was paid, when the emotions were at their peak… we found out the price for our sin. The monstrous retribution. To be chased for our crime to the ends of the universe, to have our deed stain our very faces and follow after us like a foul smell. She died after that first terrible assault.” - John (htn. pg. 346)

"That freak would have gone for me already… she could never act human." -Mercymorn (htn. pg. 408)

the lyctors knew some amount of truth about Alecto's resurrection, likely that shes essentially a resurrection beast (htn. pg. 478)

"'A monster, John!' Augustine barked. "She was a bloody monster in a human suit! She was a monster the moment you resurrected her, and then you went and made her worse!'" - Augustine (htn. pg. 478)

Gideon & Pyrrha liked Alecto despite the fact that the other lyctors (at least Mercy and Augustine) didn't (htn. pg. 479)

One of the reasons the lyctors wanted her dead was because the RBs were partially coming for her (htn. pg. 479)

Appears to claim Harrow's body after Gideon "dies" in the river (htn. pg. 500)

notes from nona the ninth

"Sometimes, [...] I don't like when you do- the necromancy word- [...] -but it feels nice at the same time. It's mixed up. It's like when you do that, it makes me sad- not sad that you did it, but sad that you can do it." - Nona, to Palamades (ntn. pg. 65)

"Nona loved the blue sphere as much as she loved everything else. She, and nobody else, could hear it sing." (ntn. pg. 125)

"'And I'm not scared of dying. Really truly, Cam, I'm not…' 'Why not?' said Camilla. Nona thought about it. 'Because I like letting go of the pull-up bars and falling off,' she said. 'I don't like the part just before you let go and I don't like the part where you hit the floor, but I like the letting go.'"- Nona and Cam (ntn. pg. 125)

"Dust of my dust- such similar star salt- what they did to you and what they wrung from you and what shape they made you fill- we see you still- we seek you still- we murdered- we who murder- you inadvertent tool- you misused green thing- come back to us- take vengeance for us- we saw you- we see you- I see you." - Judith, (as Varun) to Nona (ntn. pg. 164)

Nona likes Gideon's (originally Pyrrhas?? maybe?) sunglasses, but only so long as nobody wore them (ntn. pg. 165)

"then she told herself sternly, Stop it! If she was going to do it, she thought, she might as well do it. She had some vague notion that when you committed to a thing you had to do it all the way. Who had said that to her? Who had taught her that? Once you've stepped in, said the voice in the back of her head, you're in. This isn't the Hokey Pokey. She had remembered something- she had finally remembered something! Only she didn't have anyone to tell." (ntn. pg. 203)

"Nona had thrown exactly two tantrums in her entire life. She couldn't remember anything about the first one, but Pyrrha had told her about it. Pyrrha had been laughing with her mouth, but not with her eyes: her eyes had been very brown and distant and uneasy, as though this tantrum had reminded Pyrrha of something her brain didn't want to bring back." (ntn. pg. 275)

"'But you see, Palamades, I don't mind dying,' said Nona, trying to make him understand. 'I've been doing it for ages. I'm not scared.'" (ntn. pg. 289)

"'I am glad you did not tell us this. We had no idea there was any recourse from Varun the Eater's effects, nor any beast.' 'Its pure theory,' Camilla said curtly. "Something's being transmitted through the light spectrum. Absorption through the eyes is worse for the brain.' This made Nona think of something. It tugged at the edges of her memory and stayed there, nagging.'" - We Suffer & Cam (ntn. pg. 322)

Nona says that she never liked her hands (ntn. pg. 357)

"She wanted to shout. She wanted to be listened to. She wished the barrier had taken her hands. She wished she had thrust herself into it- become that big seething mass of flesh and meat and tendrils- ruined her body, just melted it; come back messed up, so that nobody could want her body but her, so that it would be hers and nobody else's. This was a horrible thing to think. Nona hated herself immediately and fervently." (ntn. pg. 358)

She hates having just two feet (ntn. pg. 390)

“You were the noise that was everywhere. It was like trying to talk to someone down a phone line with someone screaming through a megaphone in the same room. You drowned everything out. You were so huge and so complicated, and you were screaming, You wouldn’t stop screaming, You were so scared. You were so goddamn mad.” (ntn. pg. 405)

“You were screaming. I wanted you to stop, I wanted… I wanted you. I wanted you like a caveman wants a wildfire… or the sun. I thought you were going to take me, somehow. Purge me. Use me as an instrument. But you didn’t say anything…I was babbling, Show me. Come on. I’m ready. You kept screaming and screaming… like a baby in pain. So I tried to hurt you- I did hurt you. I reached out for you, and it hurt you… but I wasn’t strong enough. The caveman. The wildfire. The Neolithic priest staggering in front of the falling star.” (ntn. pg. 407)

“I wanted to make you the most beautiful body I could think of. He paused and said: “But I was stressed, okay? I was insane. Most of what had made me John had gone somewhere else. There were a few little thoughts left…a handful of things that made me me… a couple scraps of id. It’s not fair to judge me, right? I didn’t do this thinking… I didn’t do it like art. When I was seven, you know, all Nana had to play with in her house was some of Mum’s old toys. And my favourite out of all of them…” He gave a long, shuddering sigh. “My favourite was her old Hollywood Hair Barbie,” he murmured. “I loved her little gold outfit and her long yellow hair. She was the best. She got to have all the adventures. [...]” He said, from my blood and bone and vomit I conjured up a beautiful labyrinth to house you in. I was terrified you’d find some way to escape before I was done. I made you look like a Christmas tree fairy… I made you look like a Renaissance angel… I made you Adam and Eve… Galatea. Barbie. Frankenstien’s monster with long yellow hair. He said, As the world went up I remade us both. I hid me in you… I hid you in me. And when we were together… once the shaman had claimed the sun… I became God.”- John (ntn. pg. 408)

“Do you remember what you said to me once I had done it? When we stood here together?” She looked at him and she said, “Yes.” He said- “You said, ‘I picked you to change, and this is how you repay me?’” She said- “What else did I say?” He said: “You said, ‘What have you done to me? I am a hideousness.’” She said- “What else did I say?” He said, “Where did you put the people? Where did they go?” She said, “I still love you.” He said, "You said that too.” - John & Alecto/Harrow (ntn. Pg. 410)

Nona has some kind of blackout on top of the truck and something happens in that time that convinces Pyrrha of her true identity (ntn. pg. 413)

Also based on Nona’s reaction at that point, maybe Alecto didn’t like Pyrrha even though Pyrrha liked Alecto (ntn. pg. 413)

“She’s scared to die. You’re afraid of so many things, but she’s only afraid to die. Then when the disciples come to you and say the word Lyctor, she does not understand that they want the thing you did to her- she watches as you watch… watch them misunderstand the process.” - Harrow, to John, (ntn. pg. 434)

“In [Aiglemene’s] hands was a huge black-metal pike about the same height as her, with an edge that gleamed in the light. Nona couldn’t stop herself looking at that edge: for some reason it made her palms sweat, and the back of her neck itch again.” (ntn. pg. 454)

“I might not help you when.. I'm back," she said, not quite understanding I. “I'll be different. I'll remember everything. I'll remember the thing I'm trying to forget. And Palamedes- I won't love him. I won't love Camilla, or Pyrrha, or Hot Sauce, or even Noodle. I won't love anything… I won't know how. I won't be me at all, or.. I'll be the me who knows the thing, and knowing the thing means I'm not Nona- I'm someone else." (ntn. pg. 460)

she recognizes the tower, and the devils (ntn. pg. 440, and 447, respectively)

“You let that monster out of its box," said Ianthe, "and you start us down a path nobody can save us from. If God truly wants her out… if Teacher set this all up… if he wants her…" “Wants her? He told me to kill her. He said Make it quick, but kill her, said me with my blood could do it- said me with my blood, I was the only one… " [...] “He loves her! " Ianthe howled. “John loves Alecto - John needs Alecto! Without that piece of Goddamn fridge meat, he's nothing- and we need to keep him that way!” - Ianthe & Kiriona, accidentally prompting nona to remember everything (ntn. pg. 470)

“She had been taken down this corridor: she had squeezed through this crack in the rock- not a passageway, not at that point. John had told her he had something to show her. He had said, It's very pretty. You'll like it. [...] John loved her. She was John's cavalier. She loved John. For she so loved the world that she had given them John. For the world so loved John that she had been given. For John had so loved her that he had made her she. for John had loved the world. [...] She hadn't come on purpose; the scrap of black-eyed meat had asked for it- the chain of a kiss: the ice that burnt the flesh of the mouth that had stuck to the mouth that was frozen.The teardrop on the hand. The hand that John had fashioned. [...] John had said, It's so beautiful. Come and look. She had said, There are almost no beautiful things left. where is Anastasia? Let me talk to Anastasia. [...] Glowworms, she had told John. Technically beetles, said John, but I always loved them. Narrow beetles with long strands hanging off them- a carpet of shifting, dead, winking lights at the top of the grave. Greenish, orangish, yellowish, moving over one another silently with those long filaments hanging down. [...] And the water- the huge pool of real salt water, where she had knelt and drank- [...] John and she had swum to the centre hummock rising out of the pool. Not an island, not really. An outcropping. With the marble pillars, and the marble top, and the long low marble table. He said he thought it was a nice place to be. To lie down. She had liked hard things to lie down on. It was hard to endure having a spine.” (ntn. starting page 471)

“There she was; John had made her so ugly, so unbearably ugly. The terrible face, with the terrible arms and legs and the terrible middle part, and the terrible hair, and the terrible ears: the nose too short, the ears too brief. But there she was- and within her the child, asleep, with the strange sword. The sword- her sword- her own edge had been pushed out, her swinging edge, her toy. Her plain bladed sword. And her body was chained up…” (ntn. pg. 474)

“Then Alecto remembered the vow, and turned back upon the altar to face the second child and raised the sword with wrath in her heart, for they meant to bring destruction upon her. But when the black-eyed infant showed her countenance to Alecto, Alecto recalled her, for it was a face one dreamed in Alecto's dream. and Alecto stayed the sword.” (ntn. pg. 476)

“And Alecto said, Pyrrha, he laid me down as an appeasement to them; he fed you to them as an appeasement to them; but he has never appeased me, and now all he has done was teach me how to die." (ntn. Pg. 476)

"Alecto said, I am very sorry about Samael. The child made no answer. Alecto said, I remember my vows. As I swore to Anastasia I swear to you. I am in your service until you bid me the favour, and whatsoever you appoint I shall perform, and consider the vow rendered. This is what I promised, until such a time as you deal with me as you see fit.” (ntn. pg. 477)

#junos silly little locked tomb thoughts #tlt #the locked tomb #tlt meta #gideon the ninth #harrow the ninth #nona tha ninth #gtn #htn #ntn #ntn spoilers #alecto #alecto the ninth #alecto tlt #nona tlt #alecto the first

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cordeliawhohung · 1 month

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Soft Spot Dissection (Blood Soaked Cotton)

soft spot master list | links to answered asks | major spoilers for the series if you haven't read it, this is me picking apart my writing as a personal project <3

Welcome! First, I’d like to mention that I have no idea what I’m doing with this dissection. I’m attempting to put it in an essay-like format for ease of reading, but trying not to make it too essay-like so that it’s boring, ya know? A lot of this is going to be me just… copying and pasting paragraphs and then talking about it. So, just pretend that this is some really thought out opening paragraph and that I’ve got a killer thesis sentence and that this isn’t just some half-cracked author venting about her work. Capiche? Thanks.

Anyway, we come to the first installment of Soft Spot: Blood Soaked Cotton. I’ve mentioned this a few times before, but this whole series actually started out as a one shot. Hence the rather… odd name. Believe it or not, but I actually really dislike the title Soft Spot. It’s just… not me. Not how I like naming things. It was a title I panic chose when I realized I wanted to write more. If I had the opportunity to change it, I’d honestly go with Everything You Touch. Fits the vibe more, in my opinion. But that’s beside the point.

Anyway, it’s so jarring to read this story. I haven’t really actually sat down and read any of the parts after I posted them, and it’s crazy to start out with Simon and Spook not knowing one another. Just… strangers. Had I known this was going to be a longer series, I wouldn’t have started it out the way I did. With the little internal monologue with Simon. It works, in a way, and I don’t know what I would’ve changed it to, but it wouldn’t have been this.

“It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. Really, it wasn’t supposed to happen at all. But things never exactly work out how we think they will, and Simon Riley wasn’t a stranger to surprises.”

Just sounds… so flat, compared to how I started every other part lmao.

Have a good one. It was always the same farewell you gave him. Of course the factitious answer that came to mind was ‘have a good one what?’ but he knew better than to be a smart ass. But really, the question truly was a valid one in his mind. Have a good what? Day? Afternoon? Life? He was too far gone for that.

I based Simon’s facetious answer off of something my old co-worker’s husband used to say. I hated him. He was a prick. But it’s the type of bluntness I thought Simon would hold lmao. But then Simon’s thought, of him being too far gone for a good life, was sorta done intentionally when I wrote it. Because he’s supposed to see that he can have a good life when he meets Spook (:

It tore the delicate skin of your bottom lip vertically, nearing the corner of your mouth. Dark, crunchy scabs clogged the wound up, and he could tell by the way your tongue kept prodding at it that it smarted something fierce. But it didn’t stop there. A slight bruise on the back part of your cheekbone, an even deeper bruise peeking out from underneath your blouse on your collarbone, a broken nail that chipped off uncomfortably close to your nail bed.

Re: Referencing Spook’s injuries. I wish I had referred back to this, her wounds, in Everything You Touch. I think the parallels would’ve been heartbreaking. Hindsight is 20/20 or whatever. Especially because in this first installment, Simon is haunted by Spook. Constantly sees her injuries, and it chases after him worse than anything he’s seen in the field sorta thing. Oh well.

It used to be white, but had been stained by various things over the years he had it, and it even sported some fraying on the edges. It was clean, at least. Because of this, he was extremely surprised to hear your response to him. “I’ll ruin it.”

Re: Simon giving Spook his handkerchief when her lip started to bleed. Her comment here, I’ll ruin it. Although unintentional, it gives the impression that she’s always, in some sort of way, been afraid of filth. She’s always feared the rot inside of her and of transferring it to someone else, like she’s sick with some disease. Sort of makes her obsession with being clean later in the series a bit more understandable. These were just the very first few hints of it.

“Figured you’d need another one after I ruined the one you gave me,” you said, wiggling it in your hands for him to take. “You also strike me as a dog person, so this seemed fitting.”

Re: Spook giving Simon a new handkerchief a few weeks/days/whatever later. This is so funny to me. You also strike me as a dog person. Be so for real right now. As if you didn’t bring home a gooey pile of cat a few years later. As if that weird freak doesn’t grow into being Simon’s best bud. I love them.

October brought in a sharp chill to the air that had you wearing a nice knitted sweater to help stave off the draft in the building. Its dark background with popping jack-o-lantern theme matched perfectly with your area of the bank. Despite it only being halfway through the month you had already prepared for Halloween with a bowl of candy sitting on the counter and themed jelly stickers on the window behind you.

Though it was never explicitly said, Halloween is Spook’s favorite holiday (: Which is unfortunate. Keep this in mind.

“Must be neat,” you said in awe. “Despite all the military stuff, anyway. I bet you get to travel the world and see so many neat things. I’d kill for an opportunity like that… no pun intended.”

I wrote this pun on accident and then reread the sentence and was like wow. A bit on the nose but I’m keeping this.

“Thanks for coming with me tonight,” you said softly, head returning to lean against your hand as you looked up at him. Even sitting next to him he was still so much bigger than you. “Honestly, I thought you were going to say no. Doesn’t really seem like your type of place so… just know I appreciate it.” What gave that impression? His tense shoulders? Or his eyes flickering around the room at least twenty times every minute like he was constantly on edge? “Don’t mention it,” he said, his voice low and rumbly. You smiled something soft, something fleeting as your eyes dropped down to look at his hands clasped around the cup of water. He hadn’t taken a single sip of it the entire time the two of you sat there. Not that you had expected him to, anyway. Certainly not with that mask of his. Maybe some time in the future you’d ask him about it, but that moment wasn’t the right time.

Rereading this, I think Spook has a love for broken things just as much as Simon does. Which is why she’s so drawn to him, despite his appearances. Which is why he lets her get close even though he knows it’s not a good idea. They’re both sad, broken people. And in a way, they’ve been sort of disconnected from “normal” people. It’s hard for Spook to find a partner who understands her situation. It’s hard for Simon to find a partner who can handle his aloofness. So when they find each other? It’s only natural that they’re so impossibly drawn to one another.

You slipped away before he could protest that idea, and he grumbled as he pushed his cup of water towards the end of the bar. Shitty music filled his ears as he sat there waiting for you, and without your voice to drown out the commotion around him, it consumed him. Sharp crack of the billiard balls crashing together, the scent of greasy pub pizza, the ringing of a bell as the door opened, the chilling October breeze bleeding into the building, the stale scent of cigarettes.

Though it’s only hinted at minorly, Eric, Spook’s ex, was a smoker. Hence the smell of cigarettes that’s mentioned here as the door opens. This is where Eric enters and starts to make a fuss. Etc etc etc.

Then came the sound of flesh crashing against flesh as the palm of your hand slapped the man across the face. It was enough to grab the attention of everyone in the surrounding area, including the bartender who looked like he was one bad comment away from dialing 999. “Get your fucking hands off of me,” you seethed. Unfortunately for you, the slap hardly seemed to phase him, and his grip only tightened. The man’s jaw set taut as his other hand came up and grabbed your waist with bruising force, drawing you closer to him as he bared his teeth in a snarling grin.

Okay. OKAY. Everyone listen up!!! The entire story? Yeah? And Spook’s trauma? There’s this whole motif that I — quite frankly — abused the fuck out of. It’s violence. This whole, trying to break the cycle, of knowing violence, of experiencing violence, things of that sort. And then what do we get? Spook being violent. Spook is the first character throughout the entire series to ever show violence. To hit someone. To demand something of them. Sure, Eric fucking deserves it, and she was obviously beaten before, but that doesn’t change the fact she is the first character to be explicitly violent. (:

This was done by accident. Something that I came across while re-reading and it just hits so hard. Almost like it’s hinting at something terrible. That no matter how hard she tries to distance herself from her abusive past, it’s too ingrained in her DNA for her to escape it.

It was disgusting. The very sight of that man with his hands on you like he had won a prize. Greedy fingers digging into your flesh like he planned to take, and take, and take. Simon had seen it all before. Seen it in his own flesh as unwanted hands clawed at him. Felt it on his face in the form of a vile, wet tongue swiping around his mouth. It was in the screams he couldn’t hold back as the hook tore through his flesh. It was in the blood that spilled down his body as he hung there while they laughed. It was in the maggots that he sat in as he was buried alive. It was- It was the pain he felt in his hand as his knuckles collided with the man’s jaw, snapping his head to an uncomfortable angle. In an instant his body went rigid and then limp. Those revolting hands fell away from you as his body collided with the floor beneath him, and the only sound he was able to make was a fit of air leaving his lungs upon impact.

Here we have Simon essentially blacking out. Of seeing Spook’s trauma and realizing that they aren’t so different. I think that’s what ultimately attracted him to her in the first place. The fact that she wasn’t just broken, but she was like him. Even if he didn’t fully know it yet. Their pasts had been intertwined in some disgusting, twisted way this entire time, and I think this is the moment he starts to realize it.

Never before had he been so glad to harm someone. Any other time it was a necessity. Saving himself. Saving a comrade. Nothing that he ever took pleasure or joy in. It was just work. But that? Hurting that man the way he did? He took joy in that.

Another accidental thing I did here, but I totally forgot about this paragraph. Of Simon enjoying what he did to Eric (kicking his ass). Makes the conversation Spook and Bukin have later in the series all the more terrifying. Specifically:

“I think he likes the blood and the gore of violence. There is something comforting about spilling blood knowing that it lessens the chance of your own being poured. He finds safety in death. And while I can appreciate the sentiment, I never really had the stomach for blood. No, I prefer to watch things squirm.”

Once again, this started off as a one shot, and I never reread this fucking part while writing so this is all by accident but it makes my stomach churn in a way I can’t describe lmao.

“See you next week, Simon.” That was the moment that he decided he liked the way his name sounded when you said it. You never barked it like an order, or screamed it in anger. He had hated his name for a long while, hated being called anything other than his callsign for work. But when it came from your lips, well, maybe it wasn’t all that terrible. “Yeah,” he said, shoving his hands into his pockets. The band-aids pulled awkwardly at his skin as he paused on the porch of your apartment. “See you next week.”

There’s something to be said about this farewell. It’s why I referenced it again in the epilogue in the synopsis. I think it’s the first goodbye that they say to one another that they don’t really want to say. Because they — whether they realize it or not — are already so terribly attached to one another. And honestly, I wish I had ended the part here rather than going further into detail. I felt like I was over explaining it. Everything is already right here.

Anyway; that’s about everything I have for this part. I know it’s not a whole lot, but like I mentioned before, this was supposed to be a one shot, so this part doesn’t have a whole lot of… meaning behind it. Besides the few accidents that I found, anyway lmao. As always, feel free to send any questions about the work my way! Things I didn’t cover in this part that you’re still curious about, things of that sort!

#core talks #soft spot #soft spot dissection

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stagehunt · 1 month

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AUTHOR PORTRAIT ...

get to know the author behind the blog! repost, don't reblog.

Basics

NAME: vos AGE: 23 PRONOUNS: they/them YEARS OF WRITING: that definitely depends on what you classify as writing but i discovered rp as a concept in 2010 which was probably just a bit after i got into writing little short stories and things as a kid. i was writing them by hand in a little notepad that somebody in my family handed over to a school teacher, extremely mortifying ordeal to me at the time lmfao

Reflection

WHY DID YOU PICK UP WRITING? i’m pretty sure i first started by writing shitty warrior cats fanfics actually, and i didn’t know that fics or fandom in general was even a thing at the time so u could say i was destined for this sort of brainrot fgdjkh little nine year old me also encountered rp for the first time by searching for warrior cats flash games (i guess?? idk what i actually thought i’d find) and instead wound up on some random webpage with a chatbox. moved on from there to writing awful, horrible (but very fun) naruto oc’s on a website that i think was called chatango some years later, dabbled a little on imvu, and started writing on tumblr around 2015 iirc

DO YOU HAVE ANY WRITING ROUTINES? i wouldn’t say so? sometimes i’ll listen to like… instrumental interludes from certain albums or smth that i won’t enjoy too much because i find music very distracting, not just for writing but in general, and sitting in silence is a weird feeling to me too. when it comes to other things i need a podcast or video essay or something similar to be at all productive but it’s hard to focus on writing with someone yapping in your ear. i used to save writing for nights even when i have free time throughout the day, because i tend to feel bad about sitting at a computer screen all day, but with my activity in its current state i have to sit down and get it out the moment inspiration and energy align themselves for me.

WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE PART ABOUT WRITING? sorry to steal your answer but i def have to agree with what layla said re the community aspect of rp actually. it’s so nice to be able to just click with someone over a shared (sometimes niche) interest and love for certain medias/characters/dynamics/genres etc. the feeling of finding someone who shares your vision. and also stemming from the same thing, i’ve always felt that my favorite and most “solid” muses are the ones that i’ve gotten the chance to develop alongside another through plotting. love shared canon, love affiliated oc’s, love group verses. allllll that good stuff.

THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOUR WRITING. gonna break the format we’re following here because i have to ramble and idk how to break all this into three titles, so obviously being succinct isn’t one of the answers here kfdjghd

i always try to capture a different flow and style (???) of prose depending on who i’m writing, and i’m never sure if that really comes through for others or if i just seem inconsistent, but whenever i look back at old blogs i can see it for myself and that at least keeps me content :) i want to read my writing back and feel that it has character outside of just the spoken dialogue.

i like to spend a lot of time with a piece of writing, which realistically is not to my benefit in terms of activity, but i do just really enjoy drafting and redrafting, rearranging, nitpicking at everything until it’s as close to being what i want to be as i can get it. so that’s more about the writing process than the writing itself, but i think it’s still important to allow myself to have fun with it fkjghd

pulling a blank on a third thing bc this is actually a really difficult question but i’ll come back and edit it later if something pops into my head kfjgdh

A question for the next person

HAVE YOU MADE ANY STRONG CONNECTIONS / FRIENDS DURING YOUR TIME WRITING? for sure. one of my dearest friends in this world is not a writer but someone who i met as a mutual friend of my first rp partner. i’m not really in touch with that person who introduced us anymore but i simply couldn’t live without my bestie and i consider writing the only reason we really met and she gets to kinda "beta" some of the things i do write dfkgjhd i’ve also traveled to the states a couple of times in my teens to meet a rp buddy who i’ve known since i was around ,, twelve or so i believe.

wouldn’t be right not to shout out @ohchosen here either because i was very close to leaving tumblr (and also probably rp) for good when we became friends, and writing/plotting tmkz together has been one of the best experiences i’ve ever had on this website, where friends and mutuals tend to come and go. you never did. you’re probs the funniest person i’ve ever spoken to, craft the most beautifully written responses imaginable, you put a world of effort into developing your muses and you let me derail every single one of conversations to talk about music instead gfjhdg sorry i’m so mean to you. ily a lot.

there’s also a handful of mutuals who i don’t necessarily talk or interact with very much anymore but have been around for years at this point and i have fond memories with too. always so so so glad to see you pop up on the dash, it makes me smile every time so i’ll use this as an opportunity to wave at you, you know who you are <3

NEW QUESTION: where do you draw the most inspiration from when writing? music, other medias, ur fave author, a dream you once had etc.

tagged by @oneireth tysm <3 tagging val take my love letter as ur tag, also hi @heliador @loetise @tiderider @yeonban @pearlcure @deathsmaidens @sungracd !!!!!

#this shouldn't have taken so long to do . i'm nothing if not a yap #sorry if you've already been tagged i haven't been perceiving the dash too much lately 😭#❝ 𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙤𝙛 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙚𝙧 ♤*´. ── dash game.

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sherbet-shivers · 2 months

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Introduction

Hi friends! You can call me Sherbet/Sherbie (25yo, she/her). I write sick!fics (fan and OC) that’re mainly snz-centered or oriented. **Due to the nature of my content, I ask that none of my fics be shared to minor or non-snz/whump k!nk blogs!!!**

I’ll be pinning this post so anyone can feel free to refer to the following section (below the cut) where I detail more about myself and my writing preferences! I’ll also include a fic master-list at the bottom there. Otherwise, thanks for quickly stopping by! I finally have the nerve to share my stuff with the community, so I hope you guys can find something you enjoy! <3

A few personal notes:

I’ve never actually posted to tumblr regularly before (this is my first time sharing fics in general), so please be patient as I learn the ropes! Feedback or formatting advice are always welcome and appreciated!!

I respectfully ask that minors dni with my page, please!! This is a k!nk blog and I do write explicit content sometimes.

I'm a BIG rpg gaming and anime fan (who dabbles in live action series on rare occasions)! Most of my fics feature my favorite characters and series atm. Watch and game recommendations are invited!

I’m EXTREMELY private, thus I’d prefer not to share any PID or other information I haven’t already posted/included in my bio. Messages are welcome, but please be respectful!

This is NOT my main page! So while I won’t be able to like posts, I can follow and reblog! Hopefully this suffices so that I can spread and celebrate the wonderful talents you guys have <3

Fic-relevant notes:

I include: a quick summary (blurb), estimated word count, a feat. character list, and TWs at the start of ALL my fics. Please check them out prior to reading anything of mine in case there’s something icky you don’t vibe with. If you feel like a TW or tag is needed that’s not already there, just dm me!! Smart reading is safe reading <3

Things I write: I typically favor M allergies, but do write F/NB characters, colds, and fevers too (equal snz rights bc snz is snz)! I eat up hurt/comfort, so whump and very minor injury are often applicable to my stories. Again, keep an eye out for the TWs if you have concerns!

Things I DON’T write: I’m NOT an emeto person at all (I’m phobic IRL), but personally won’t turn away if it’s mentioned in a fic. You’ll never see a full fic from me where emeto is central to the story, but it could be mentioned (check TWs to be safe). I am also NOT into writing about real people or making furry content (sorry)! I’m self-conscious about writing OOC, so I don’t typically write characters from series I haven’t seen or am at least vaguely familiar with.

Since I’ve never published my writing before, I have never taken requests, but I do love the thought of receiving recommendations, so feel free to reach out via dm or ask if you have a fic idea! I’d love to give it a try, just please be patient with me!

Fic Masterlist (Title // Fandom // Character(s) // Length // + Hyperlinks):

A Minor Malfunction (D:BH, Co/nnor R/K800 (M), ~12k words total) -> Parts One, Two and Three

Thanks again for checking out my blog guys! Many a snz to all!! <3

#snz #snzblr #snz kink #snz blog #snzfic #pinned snz-intro post

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jmflowers · 1 year

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8, 9, 11, 14, 24 💗

8. Is there a story idea in your mental vault that you’ve never been brave enough to try writing? Is this the year? Can you tell us about it?

Oh, there are so many things puttering about in my brain. I’m really proud of myself for having written most of them down this year. There’s one prompt that’s been sitting in my inbox since June that I have tried several times to get started on and I’ve yet to be able to get it exactly right. I keep feeling slightly off-kilter once I get it going and I think that ultimately comes down to fear, since it centers on physical intimacy and I always shy away from writing things that could border into smut.

The thought was an exploration of a specific moment in time, one that was never mentioned in canon so it gives me a pretty ambiguous stretch of space to play with. And explicit smut was not requested, which is what makes my nerves around it so frustrating, haha. I’d like to use it as an opportunity to touch into a poem that’s been sitting in my inbox since May as part of the prompt party submissions, too. We’ll see. I think I just need to get over myself. Or talk through that moment in time over and over again until what I dream up feels really true to them.

9. Short term goals… what do you hope to complete this week or in January?

I have a monster piece that I’ve been working on for a couple of months that I’d like to finish before I head back to school next week. It’s sort of a sequel to Travel Light, in that it focuses on the trajectory of Beatrice’s life. I’ve nearly got part 1 (of 2? 3?) completed and I’m really looking forward to sharing it. It’s scary to post knowing part 2 hasn’t been started, but hopefully the first section will be able to standalone comfortably for a bit and then be a nice collection with the second section later.

11. Would you like to try any new fanfic genres or tropes this year?

I don’t know that I’m really a trope kind of writer. I definitely have a tendency to follow where characters take me and that’s rarely ever into fanfic-specific plot points or tropes. (I think?) I’ve been writing a lot of third person present tense for the last year, though, and I’d love to return to some of the more playful ways I used to write – specifically second person point of view. Writing in that format just tickles something in my brain that really challenges me and I don’t often get the opportunity to stretch those muscles.

14. Have you ever lost large chunks of your work in the past, due to not backing up your work? Will you change your methods this year?

Not writing so much, but I lost a ton of photos and documents back in 2012 when the hard drive in my computer got fried. I’ve been pretty good ever since – everything is backed up onto multiple external hard drives and anything I work on between both my laptop and desktop is stored on a cloud drive. School has trained me to be extremely organized with my files; I have no plans to change anything about my file management.

I did have a bunch of stories posted on FF.net back in the day and I went through years ago and removed anything that wasn’t complete that I didn’t intend to finish. I know I saved all of those documents, but I wish I had a clear record of what was once posted there. Occasionally an old reader will mention a specific story to me by title and I don’t usually have any memory of it.

24. By the end of this year, you want your fandom to think of you as “that author who ___.”

I’d like the fandom to think of me as an author who wrote something that brought them comfort. Right now, I write to create safe spaces for myself, and I share my writing so that other people can find some safe spaces, too.

#janelle's asks #fanfic ask game #fanfic asks #thank you friend!#it's fun to try to answer some of these with just a little bit of vagueness #if anyone wants to dissect that one moment in time with me until i can write it...#maybe I should try starting it in second person and see what happens #fic writing life #drlaurenb

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buffintruder · 1 year

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I’m making up an end of year fic writing ask thing because why not, all these answers apply to the past year

Most Popular fic

what if the real steel samurai fandom was the friends we made along the way by a long shot in every single measure. I did not expect this to be so popular

Favorite fic

To Turn the World Upside Down, my ace attorney au where Phoenix’s family is ‘blessed’ by a trickster god. Honestly I think it ranks among the best things I’ve written? I’m still in the middle of posting it, but I just think I do a good job with descriptions and character interactions and character growth in this one

Most unexpected fic

This is a tie between two Kamen Rider fics:

Endless Futures Ahead because it’s a Gou/Chase fic and I started writing this (in 2021 actually but whatever) before I’d even seen a full Kamen Rider series. I knew this show was going to suck me in if I ever started watching it (and it did), but I did not think I would write 20k+ words about characters in a show I had only seen a handful of episodes about

Across the River of Stars. I read the Blade novel, sat on it for like a week, particularly the ending where Kenzaki and Hajime agree to meet one night a year (just like the cowherd and weaver of myth, i thought!), and then out of nowhere I wrote 2k words at work about them meeting once a year in modern times. I started it about exactly a month ago and posted it today, so I think this is also the fic I’ve finished the quickest this year (that or my other Blade fic, idk how long that one took to write)

Fics for next year:

The next one I will post is a toss up between:

-the as of yet unnamed sequel to my steel samurai fic. this is 50% Klavier during aa4 having the Worst Year of His Life and 50% Klavier being heart eyes over Apollo, as seen through his unofficial social media (right now about 5k long, i’ve gotten past aa4-4 and the immediate aftermath, i just need to figure out where i want this to end, go over it a couple times, and then do all the formatting)

-The Future Where All Sorrows End (title subject to change) my Kamen Rider Blade soul nemesis au where Kenzaki and Hajime know that they are fated to be each other’s undoing from the moment they meet (right now somewhere in the 50-60k range. i need to finish the last scene, decide if i want to add a post-canon scene where Kenzaki hangs out with Kotaro and Hirose, and then do a bunch of editing but a lot of that i’ll do after i start posting chapters)

The next fic I plan to start writing:

Honestly probably a Kamen Rider W fic. I’m not entirely sure where I’m going with this premise, but I’ve had the rough idea in my head for 6ish months now and watching Fuuto PI + rewatching W with my brother is giving me feels. The basic premise is that instead of Gaia memories, it’s ghosts. Akiko shows up at the PI agency one day and is like “guys your business model sucks, we’re making a ghost investigating youtube channel as well as being private investigators”. Philip is the camera man never on screen but often making snarky comments from the background. The fic alternates between Wakana’s pov who is like ‘what is up with these youtubers that keep referencing my radio show’ and Philip who is like ‘i’m weirdly obsessed with this radio host but i don’t think it’s in a romantic way’. And then they start talking like in canon but no one dies and everything ends happily :) including for Kirihiko

Tagging @arofili @gallus-rising @queerfandommiscellany @moth-time and anyone else who wants to do this, my internet is wonky so i can’t see who follows me and i don’t have a good memory. Also feel free to change the questions if you want, I came up with these just now while sleepy

#my writing

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youcantrewind · 2 years

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My Croya Playlist : The Deluxe Edition 😅

Playlist update! The main one still exists, carefully still gif'd and lyric'd out over in that main post, but since I started putting so many bonus songs that didn't make the cut into that side playlist, I thought I'd make an amalgamated version with everything together. This nearly doubles the length of the old one, and adds songs that aren't necessarily as perfect for the back-and-forth, specific voices format I was trying to stick to with the main list (and causes an artist bias to creep in with a lot of The Midnight 😅), but it's still a bunch of extra tracks that still make me think about their characters, relationship, my fanfic, etc, so:

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/09QWPuPh3OFPnHWy8ajh3m?si=b83836ed06b94e96

And like the original playlist post, here's some relevant lyrics and some thought process behind the cut for the new tracks (sorry no gifs this time, they’d just be reused ones anyway). Click! :

New tracks:

Humankind - Coldplay

Oola Shuka baby. Oola Shuka.

Today I heard the strangest, I heard the strangest song, A DJ a star away is, Playing it to turn us on

My heart started glowing, I feel it inside, it's flowing

Today I had the strangest, Feeling that I belong (belong), Before, I was dying, I feel it inside, now I'm flying

Dance With Somebody - The Midnight

This would have originally been the song for the Rockstar Queen dance, except that I wanted Gaya songs to be female singers/diva songs, and also the lyrics of the Christina Aguilera song matched so well with both lyrics in ‘Rockstar Queen’ and also lining up with the follow up song. So instead of being redundant, I kept this one out, but come on:

Take off your armor Friend of mine I have no arrows But I got time All your sorrow Keeps you glued to your seat Can we get you out of your head And into your feet

And it's not that the rest of us don't have the blues It's just that some dance partners need a dance partner too

Is that you?

Life's too short to dance by yourself Could I get you to dance with somebody Dance with somebody, dance with somebody Not by yourself

She's on Fire - Brandon, SJBRAVO

So I discovered this song in some suggested tracks after the original playlist had already been done. There’s no reason it wasn’t on the list besides that. It would have notched so well lyrically among other songs I’d chosen (’Fire in the Sky’ and ‘Power over Me’ for very clear lyrical reasons even re: their titles lol) that it would have absolutely got added in there if I’d known about it sooner. Maybe they lyrically match so well it would have made more redundant songs? I dunno. For this one, I wouldn’t have cared. It’s in there now!

She's always had a certain power over me A type of mystic force, no human eye can see Long hair with velvet skin and jeans ripped at the knees The sparkle in her eye, says come and get me please

As she moves across the room, slow motion Her words inspire me to deep devotion She's everything I dreamed a girl could be, and more The eyes of an angel, smile of a killer Oh, I do anything to just be near her She's everything I dreamed a girl could be, and more

Oh, she walks like she, knows what she wants And she, carries herself like she's a loaded gun A was a dark room, she was my light The supernova within my night My heart was frozen but she's on fire, she's on fire!

She's always had a certain way of making sure To never give too much, to keep me needing more Soft lips that draw me in, a voice you can't ignore Her body moves in ways, I'm desperate to explore

As she moves across the room, slow motion Her words inspire me to deep devotion She's everything I dreamed a girl could be, and more

Neon Medusa - The Midnight

This one might not be chosen for who you initially think. Or is it? 😉

Don't fall in love with the man on stage I'll be on in a minute, I'm just sharpening my blade Don't fall for his flattering tune He'll promise you the world until you drink that perfume

It's a highway, highway to the dark And a neon Medusa's got your heart Sweet canyon lullabies Don't look straight into its eyes It's a highway, highway to the dark

There's only two ways to make it in this town One is to be brilliant, the other is to drown Don't take both drugs all in one go Can't reach the heavens passed out on the floor

It's a highway, highway to the dark And a neon Medusa's got your heart Sweet canyon lullabies Don't look straight into its eyes It's a highway, highway to the dark

[....]

Don't fall in love with the man on stage I'll be on in a minute, then sweep you away Don't fall for the monsters in this maze But I could love you forever if you'd meet my gaze

Toxic (Y2K & Alexander Lewis Remix) - Britney Spears

Okay, we know who this one is about. Again, was trying to avoid some redundancies, re songs and artists, so this one originally got the chopping block over some other Britneys...

Baby, can't you see I'm calling? A guy like you should wear a warning It's dangerous, I'm falling

There's no escape, I can't wait I need a hit, baby, give me it You're dangerous, I'm loving it

Too high, can't come down Losing my head, spinnin' 'round and 'round Do you feel me now?

With a taste of your lips, I'm on a ride You're toxic, I'm slippin' under With a taste of a poison paradise I'm addicted to you Don't you know that you're toxic? And I love what you do Don't you know that you're toxic?

Everybody Wants to Rule the World (cover) - Weezer

Cliche song at this point? Sure, but yo if the lyrics fit...

Welcome to your life There's no turning back Even while we sleep We will find you

Acting on your best behaviour Turn your back on mother nature Everybody wants to rule the world

It's my own design It's my own remorse Help me to decide Help me make the Most of freedom and of pleasure Nothing ever lasts forever Everybody wants to rule the world

There's a room where the light won't find you Holding hands while the walls come tumbling down When they do I'll be right behind you

So glad we've almost made it So sad they had to fade it Everybody wants to rule the world

I can't stand this indecision Married with a lack of vision Everybody wants to rule the world

Say that you'll never never never never need it One headline why believe it? Everybody wants to rule the world

All for freedom and for pleasure Nothing ever lasts forever Everybody wants to rule the world

Deep Blue - The Midnight

I wasn't looking for action Just some distraction Just a little weeknight booth in the back I wasn't looking for romance Just a quick slow dance and the off-chance That an off night and a side glance Might lead me to the wrong hands

I wasn't looking for you

I wasn't after forever Just for whatever I was one of the dark hearts Thought that they'd never truly be opened But this is an explosion Of star crossed and blood rushed And hair tossed and cheeks flushed And weeks lost

I wasn't looking for you

I said I never felt my heart like this She said I never felt my body I always thought the point of love was just To keep from, to keep from

Falling into the deep blue, the deep blue

What's Love Got To Do With It? - Tina Turner

More cliche? Who cares! Keep telling yourself this, Gaya. I'm sure it'll stick... 😉

You must understand how the touch of your hand Makes my pulse react That it's only the thrill of boy meetin' girl Opposites attract

It's physical Only logical You must try to ignore that it means more than that

Oh oh What's love got to do, got to do with it? What's love but a second hand emotion? What's love got to do, got to do with it? Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken?

It may seem to you that I'm acting confused When you're close to me If I tend to look dazed I've read it someplace I've got cause to be

There's a name for it There's a phrase that fits But whatever the reason you do it for me

[....]

I've been takin' on a new direction But I have to say I've been thinkin' about my own protection It scares me to feel this way

Power is Power - SZA, The Weeknd, Travis Scott

I been down for the coldest war And I'll know where I been 'cause I bled before, yeah How do I know if I let you stay? How do I know if we did it your way? You wouldn't take my place Put me away, I'd die lookin' up at your face

How do I ever know? Who can I trust? Feelings of emptiness Only love could kill me, God bless

[....]

Who's hotter? Been a monster with a crown So swamped by high water, keep your head up, you might drown In this world it's way colder, by the day, we count it down Been around, just been waitin' up, she gon' come around I took a drag, bust it out the gates, my lil' baby slay I wore the flag, put that on my face, ain't nobody safe Lift the mask, they gon' have to see what they can't erase I took a lie, so I took it back

Danger's on my mind Ain't no knife, dagger, bullet that can do it For you, yeah you know, I go right up straight through it

Heavy is the crown, but never for a queen (oh, yeah)

A knife in my heart It couldn't slow me down (couldn't slow me down) 'Cause power is power ('cause power is power) The fire never goes out (oh)

I rise from my scars Nothing hurts me now (nothing hurts me now) 'Cause power is power ('cause power is power) Now watch me burn it down (ooh, yeah, yeah)

Now watch me burn it down

Now into my post cruiser fanfic territory...

Look What You've Done - Jet

As if slapping you with silence after ‘Everything You Ever’ wasn’t enough, how about a transition to...

Take my photo off the wall If it just won't sing for you 'Cause all that's left has gone away And there's nothing there for you to prove

Oh, look what you've done You've made a fool of everyone Oh, well, it seems like such fun Until you lose what you had won

Give me back my point of view 'Cause I just can't think for you I can hardly hear you say What should I do?

Well, you choose

Oh, look what you've done You've made a fool of everyone Oh, well, it seems like such fun Until you lose what you had won

Ghost in Your Stereo - The Midnight

You move on a thousand times New lover's shadows on the blinds Your heart's a mercenary But like a dancer on the wire Come the sparks of frayed desire as the fire's carried

I'm just a ghost in your stereo The fading memory of a shipwreck in the undertow You're just a lost song I wrote And I'm just a ghost in your stereo

Dismantle. Repair. - Anberlin

I am the Patron Saint of Lost Causes A fraction of who I once believed Change, only a matter of time Opinions, I will try and rewrite

If life had background music Playing your song I've got to be honest, I tried to escape you But the orchestra plays on

And they sing, oh, whoa Things are gonna change now, for the better And oh, whoa, things are gonna change

Hands, like secrets Are the hardest thing to keep from you Lines and phrases, like knives Your words can cut me through

Dismantle me down

Repair

You dismantled me

Change Your Heart or Die - The Midnight

Took a lot of money to look the part Took a lot of pain to tame a heart Took a lot of years to lose my fear of flying

Took a long time to finally start then it Took a good day to fall apart Took a lot of tears to lose my fear of crying

Of crying

[....]

Took one look to find your mark then it Took a wrong way to blow apart Took a wrong turn to finally find the yearning And the burning

Fire Ticking like a time bomb Fire Burning like napalm Fire Waiting at the crossroads

How will you survive?

Change your heart or die

#croya #lt croy #lieutenant croy #gaya #galactic starcruiser #playlist

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vegebulmazine · 2 years

Note

Hi! I saw mod apps were open and I’d like to know a little more, if you don’t mind.

- What is the timeline (even if vague) for the zine? When does it kick off, and how long do you expect the zine to take? I’m asking because my schedule varies during the year, some periods I know I couldn’t fit mod work in, but other periods would be okay.

- What kind of skills would be needed as a mod? I’m thinking mostly of art/writing mods, and shipping mods (sorry I don’t remember the exact titles and can’t look them up without closing the ask). Would I need to know how to use specific software (writing/art), be located in a certain area (shipping), stuff like that?

As you can probably guess from this ask, I’ve never been a zine mod before, I know that’s a requirement to apply but depending on what you expect from a mod, I’m hoping I can use some other experience to help you!

I hope you have a wonderful day! Vegebul ftw!

Hello @tinyfrenchowl !!!

Of course! I'll happily answer all your questions!

-The timeline hasn't been secured yet because it will be settled & finalized on the first Mod meeting. Although I can give you an estimate of what I've thought.

Zines creative periods take 3 months min. So we would be looking at a schedule like this:

- Mod Apps: start 28/08 - end 20/09

- Mod acceptance emails go out 22/09.

- Estimate Mod joining server period: 22/09-24/09.

-Contributor Apps Open: 30th October- 30th November.

- Contributor emails out: Dec 15th

-First Check in: Jan 10th

- Second Check in : Feb 10th

- Third Check-In: March 10th

Due day: March 20th.

Putting together the zine: March-April

Pre-orders open: May

Shipping: June-July.

As for skills to apply for a Mod position in regards to those positions are:

-Art Mod: Have anatomical, compositional, color theory knowledge etc, be able to help contributors with their pieces & give advice. Make little drawings/ doodles for the graphics & the carrd.

-Graphic & Layout Mod: for this one you have to have a little knowledge in graphic design (with any software you use!) & also be able to put together the final book ready for printing.

Editor Mod: You don't need any specific software for this position but you do need to be able to read several different pieces and help the writer with any cohesive or spelling errors. You'll have to give the formatting mod the OK that all stories have been checked & read and that they are good to be put on the final PDF.

-Shipping Mod's requirement to have past experience & know how to create labels with traking numbers as well as be knowledgeable on shipping internationally.

Having experience as a Mod isn't required for all the positions! I like to give people the chance to see how the Modding process works, be it as Mods or Intern mods ( that help out and are there mostly to learn hands-on! ). One can't ever get experience if you haven't got the chance.

If you have experience that you believe can be useful, let me know on your app! For example if you've worked on a school newspaper as editor, if you have a degree on languages, if you have done graphic design before... let us know what you know & want to bring to the project!!

Futhermore, in each section of the Mod App you can find the requirements for each position ( in case I've forgoten some), so read 'em carefully! Any questions don't hesitate to ask!

Thank you for your ask & interest!!!

Can't wait to see your app♡♡

Take care! VegeBul 4ever☆

-Mod Mystic

#faq #mod apps ask #*ask #vegebulzine #vegebul fanzine

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lifeinavillage · 10 months

Text

Introduction

After the Balkans wars faded, although they never completely ended, not really, I moved to Canada. I worked in journalism and even though I tried not to bore people with my stories, occasionally I would drop an anecdote from the war here and there. People found them fascinating, but then, for those who never experienced something similar, war is like a movie, an entertainment they can watch then go home to sleep peacefully and forget it until the next morning. Knowing someone (me) who’d been through the war was what made it fascinating.

Very early on, colleagues and friends tried to talk me into writing about it. I felt that there are way too many people more deserving to have their stories told than me. I was happy entertaining friends on occasion, but writing a book, that sounded pretentious. I dismissed it. Then I got married, over twenty years ago. My wife, who got to know only my Canadian side, listened to my stories. She admits readily, she didn’t believe most of what I told. Until, one day, Teddie, an American journalist, a dear friend and former colleague, came to visit. The three of us sat at a bar and Teddie and I reminisced about our times in the Balkans. There were laughs and an occasional tear. Back home, for the first time, my wife told me: “You know, all this time I thought you were exaggerating. I know you like to tell stories, but I didn’t quite believe them.”

“So, what changed?” - I asked.

“Watching you and Teddie finishing each other’s sentences, adding details to the story, made me realize it must be real.”

Then she asked me the same thing the friends did - to write it all down. But, she went even further. Before the war started and the country I was born imploded and shattered, before I discovered photography and journalism, I was an athlete. I was a passable judoka, with some national titles to my name, and later also a fairly successful, if I may say so myself, judo coach. That part of my youth also generated entertaining anecdotes. I guess everything different was a source of fascination for my Canadian friends. Especially knowing that I grew up in communism, but remained more-or-less normal, it added a sense of exotic to my stories. And, while the friends were onto me to write down the war memories, my wife insisted I write about my whole life.

“Who’d read that stuff?” — I argued — “It’s boring! I’m nobody!”

To which she’d inevitably reply: “I would read it! Write it for me. There’s a whole half of your life I don’t know, and I want to know you! I want to know you better!”

For her I tried. Many times. And failed as many times. I guess I was more into living my life than writing about it. And, I always thought I’d have more time later. When I’m older. When I retire.

Well, that time has come. I’ve been retired for eight years now. I have time. I still don’t think this is as story worth telling. But, I read some really boring memoirs, some terrible yawners, and started thinking after each — well, if that someone found worth printing, maybe there is a space for me? All I need is one set of ears to listen, or, rather, one set of eyes to read it. And that I have secured long before I started.

There’s one more thing I want to touch on, before we move into the real story: the format. This blog! See, I still find the notion of having my life printed in a book presumptuous and pretentious. (Lots of big “p” words, I know!) Besides, I find the process of writing a book daunting! It takes too long to write and rewrite, to produce several drafts during which time I would face the increasing danger of losing my nerves and abandoning the whole thing. Blogging is immediate. And raw. The first draft is the only draft. Sure, I can come back and edit, and re-edit, but I won’t do it. Because there’s a lot of a story to tell. And because I don’t want to give myself a chance or an excuse to abandon it.

#memoir #life in a village

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racingliners · 1 year

Text

F1 Re-Watch 2013: Round 1 - Australia

Well, given how the past few days have gone, I thought I’d have to sideline my next full-season re-watch, but for the moment here we are!

Long story short, I had way more fun than I expected watching the 2022 season back. So I decided I wanted to watch another season in full (only one with much more personal enjoyment value) so I put up a poll and 2013 won.

Which is very fitting, as 2013 was the year I got back into watching F1, but a little more story time on that when we get to Spain and Canada.

While I watched all of the races from the second half of the season, I think I only watched 3 or 4 races from the first half in full. So a lot of these races I will have never seen before, including Aus (the irony of calling this a re-watch is not lost on me). So much rambling aside, let’s jump on in!

I forgot to add that the first three races will be out of sequence as I watched Malaysia in honour of Multi-21 day back in March

ugh the old F1 intro. Such a core memory, I miss her

fun fact I still try to make the final ‘neow’ sound in time with the intro because autism brain

“Will it be Sebastian Vettel with his fourth [title] in a row?” Yes Crofty. Yes it will.

oh it was cloudy in Melbourne on race day with a slim chance of rain. damn.

Now for the re-watch we’re still going to have starting grid whiplash but instead of “what do you mean X is starting in 12th?!” it’s going to be “Oh my god remember when Adrian Sutil was team mates with Paul di Resta?!”

(I realise this now makes me somewhat of an elder in the fandom and... well it’s too late in the evening my time to be mulling over shit like that)

anyway remember when Jenson was still driving?! 😭😭😭

this was also Lewis’ first race with Mercedes which knowing what we know now about all the success they’ve had makes me so incredibly emo

ANYWAY: Starting grid. and back in my day they started with the front row and went backwards.

RBR 1-2, Lewis P3. Jenson P10. (how tf does Raikkonen win this from P7?????)

DAN AND JEV MY BELOVEDS!!!!!!

ah, the man, the myth, the icon. Pastor Maldonado lines up in 17th

ahhhh cut to Lewis and the Merc crew, you can just about see Bono as well. To think this was just one year before the regs change and the beginning of Merc’s domination of the hybrid era and them becoming utter legends. WILD.

[Formation Lap]: Sorry I ramble a lot when I’m excited but ANYWAY the cars are moving now.

also rip Hulkenberg, his car went poof going to the grid so he didn’t make the start.

Bono and Simon Rennie reporting a chance of rain which... idk if I need that at twenty to eleven at night. (also WOW the quality of radio we have on the TV feed now is so good compared to ten years ago)

the whiplash of seeing Stefano Domenicali in the Ferrari garage as TP. Same ringleader different circus.

[Start/Lap 1]: and away we goooooooo

Seb with a good start, Massa with an even better start and just mugged Webber off the line. Alonso also went from P5 to P3, so Lewis is down a spot

damn Webber went from 2nd to 7th. ouch.

Lewis v Raikkonen for P4.

[Lap 2]: Rosberg watching behind with popcorn

Jenson in 9th... 2013 was the start of McLaren’s current woes and it was a painful year as a Jenson fan

meanwhile, Raikkonen passes Lewis for P4. the Lotus is zoomy.

[Lap 3]: Man it does feel so strange seeing all the old team names (for any newbies, a lot of the teams on the grid now were teams from the 2013 grid rebranded. That’s why Alpine sometimes get called Team Enstone and Aston Martin Team Silverstone bc they got rebranded so much but the personnel mostly stayed the same).

but anyway a clean first few laps, on the first race of a new season, with a tiny bit of racing???? besties we did not know how good we had it.

Seb just zooming off into the distance. He didn’t win in Aus, but still the story of 2013.

“How long will these super soft tyres last?” it’s been ten years, and yet we still hate on Pirelli. oh my.

[Lap 4]: heh. remember when Perez was a McLaren driver that one time?? (spoiler alert it didn’t end well)

Not Fernando nearly crashing into Lewis at the start bc they were both trying to avoid a very slow Mark. FELLAS.

and Jenson is the first car to stop, supers for mediums.

[Lap 5]: ahem TEEEEEED!!!!!

oh wow he thinks the go-to strategy for the race is a 3 stop. a 3 stop.

It’s been 84 years.

One stop races used to be impressive bc of making the tyres last. but now they’re the norm and quite boring.

[Lap 6]: anyway replays of Dan racing van der Garde (Caterham). Midfield spice!!!

[Lap 7]: The Ferrari’s are both catching Seb. Seb’s tyres are also looking very unhealthy.

and in he pits for his first stop.

[Lap 8]: Massa is still ahead of Alonso. my eye is twitching.

nvm Massa pits to give Fernando the lead.

That’s what, three race leaders in 8 laps???

[Lap 9]: oooh Seb jumped Massa at his first stop. nice.

“Have Ferrari made a mistake with not covering Sebastian Vettel?” ...have Ferrari EVER had a functioning strategy department????

oh wow Raikkonen chasing down Alonso... it really is the 2010s. They even follow each other into the pits.

and they maintain their positions coming out of the pits, just further down the grid.

[Lap 10]: Lewis in the lead!!! (I know, he still needs to stop)

[Lap 11]: Merc 1-2. to think in 2013 that was a rarity 🤣

“Weather wise there are pretty dark clouds coming towards us” I’m in danger

[Lap 12]: Helmet watch: Seb has a super pretty cobalt blue design which I love.

[Lap 13]: “Raikkonen the fastest man on track at the moment” F1 2010s intensifies

Meanwhile the Mercs are still yet to stop while everyone else’s tyres have crumbled

ayyyy Merc engineers and Bono sighting.

[Lap 14]: and Lewis finally pits for mediums

ah yes, 2013 aka try to tell the Merc driver apart by their different shades of yellow helmet. (Nico’s was a brighter yellow, Lewis’ a more sunflower yellow, fyi)

[Lap 15]: And Rosberg pits, giving the lead of the race to... Adrian Sutil. Breathe it in folks.

“evidence there of McLaren’s lack of pace” for comparison, Jenson and McLaren won in Australia the year prior. They were very average for the two seasons before the dreaded Honda years.

[Lap 16]: Anyway I’m just trying to soak up a Force India leading the race. Go get it Team Silverstone.

The main reason why he’s still leading is because he started on the mediums as he qualified outside the top ten (2013 was also way back when you had to start on the tyre you set your Q3 lap on if you were in the top 10)

[Lap 17]: Ticking off my “wow it’s strange seeing Fernando in a Ferrari” comment

[Lap 19]: Obligatory livery watch comment: I miss it when the RBR livery was a glossy metallic sheeny blue 😭

[Lap 20]: Adrian Sutil is still in the lead

THE SCENES

the remaining top ten is Seb, Massa, Alonso, Raikkonen, Lewis, Rosberg, Jenson, di Resta and Vergne

ah. so they think that Sutil holding up the front runners helps Merc in trying to pull off a two stop.

[Lap 21]: Alonso makes his second stop, onto another set of mediums

(this was also way back when we had just two dry compounds of tyre per race instead of the three we have now)

[Lap 22]: Sutil finally makes his first stop, and Seb makes his second.

And Sutil stays ahead of Seb, and they come out behind the Ferraris.

Fun fact, Bradley Joyce of ‘BRAAAAAAAD’ fame, who is now head engineer at Aston, was Sutil’s race engineer.

ROB SMEDLEY!!! Oh I really am showing my age.

[Lap 23]: Looks like Ferrari are trying the two-stop with Massa.

Woot, Seb passes Sutil for P6!

Just to hammer home how bad a race Webber is having, he just passed Perez for 10th.

[Lap 24]: Ah, Ferrari pitted Massa. so much for the two stop.

and this is how Raikkonen gets the lead from starting P7.

[Lap 25]: Oh god. Seb closing up to Fernando.

and cut to “Rain Expected” on the Force India pit wall. I was having a great time and now I’m being ATTACKED.

Ah, Maldonado is beached in the gravel at turn 1. No VSC as that didn’t exist yet, so just waved yellows

[Lap 27]: Rosberg pulls off to the side of the track, Merc went poof

cut to a perplexed Ross Brawn and even more perplexed Merc engineers

[Lap 28]: also also the sky looks DARK 😶

and now the weather, with Simon Rennie

(potential light drops of rain at turn 13)

[Lap 29]: There’s raindrops on Massa’s t-cam

*distressed yelling*

it is indeed, ever so slightly raining. OH BOY.

[Lap 30]: I didn’t even realise that Lewis was in P2 with all the pitstop shuffles. but Alonso is very quickly catching him.

[Lap 31]: and they’re now properly battling. 2010s F1 intensifies.

but oh it’s good to watch though.

oh my god Lewis locked up braking for the corner but still stayed ahead. KING SHIT.

I mean Also did get past in the very next corner. But still, iconique.

[Lap 32]: and he comes in at the end of the lap for another stop which I’ve very much lost count at this point.

[Lap 33]: Both Force Indias are in the top 10???? Team Silverstone intensifies

In weather news I think it’s stopped raining?? so nowhere near enough rain for anyone to think about inters.

[Lap 34]: Ah, Lotus have remembered to pit Raikkonen. I want to say that’s his second stop but I’ve truly no idea at this point.

[Lap 35]: “My tyres are not going to last 23 laps at this rate” Gonna call that the og ‘Bono my tyres are gone’ for the memes.

[Lap 37]: In what I’m now calling Sutil watch: He’s in P3. P3!!!!

we’re way past midfield spice and in full on midfield elation territory.

[Lap 38]: Seb makes his final pit stop. Another set of mediums, and he’s behind Lewis in 5th

“It [Red Bull’s race] could all change when we get to Malaysia next week” nervous laughter

[Lap 39]: So, Alonso in the lead, Sutil P2, Raikkonen P3. Not the top 3 I expected to by typing out. I’m pretty sure that Force India finish off the podium but yeah, still very wild.

[Lap 40]: And Alonso makes his final stop, he comes out behind Raikkonen.

and Seb passes Lewis for P4.

Sutil still has to stop bc he needs to run the super softs.

Massa racing Lewis and it lasted all of two seconds bc of Lewis’ 2-stop strategy.

[Lap 41]: And Dan DNFs with a mechanical fault. He has the worst luck at Albert Park I swear

[Lap 42]: Webber chasing down Di Resta for 8th.

Ooooh and a nice move under braking going into turn 9

[Lap 43]: and Lewis switches over to a 3 stop. He comes out in 6th.

And Raikkonen takes the lead off Sutil, while Alonso is chasing both of them down nearly hand over fist.

[Lap 45]: “Miserable place that is” Ted not rating RBR very highly on his tour of the garages sfhauefh

oh not Sutil getting shown a blue flag when Alonso is racing him for position 😭😭😭😭

[Lap 46]: nvm Alonso passed him anyway, but still, the disrespect

FIA you can and will meet my fists

[Lap 47]: And Sutil finally pits for the super soft tyres. That was genuinely such a good drive, we love the midfield winning

I’m not going to comment on Crofty’s “papal conclave” stats dive because otherwise I will cry laughing and it’s twenty to one in the morning.

[Lap 48]: them cutting to Martin Whitmarsh on the pitwall when McLaren are 9th and 12th, I would simply pretend there was a bad connection because OUCH

[Lap 49]: Anyway, Alonso is 7.8 seconds behind Raikkonen

And Lewis is catching is old buddy Sutil, 1.6 second gap

oh god MORE RAIN

This race really has had almost everything. whew.

the Aus GP, 100% that bitch.

oh not Brundle detailing the fallout of Lewis’ and Sutil’s friendship live on air WHAT

[Lap 51]: ANYWAY, Lewis is within DRS range, and Webber is pretty close behind them both.

oof Lewis just stormed past. And Webber gets by a few corners later.

and cut to Sutil’s tyres that already look awful wear wise

I’m shaking my fist at the sky and insulting Pirelli

[Lap 53]: Raikkonen still with a solid 7 second lead over Alonso.

[Lap 54]: 5 laps remaining klaxon

[Lap 55]: gap between Raikkonen and Alonso down to 6 seconds.

and replay of Fernando nearly spearing into a Caterham 😶

[Lap 58]: Final lap! And thanks to Brundle I just realised there hasn’t been a safety car at all this race, which for Melbourne is wild.

[Finish]: And Raikkonen wins! Alonso P2, Seb P3.

Massa, Lewis, Webber, Sutil, di Resta, Jenson and Romain Grosjean round out the Top 10.

Well! That was certainly more eventful than I expected, mainly due to trying and failing to keep track of all the pitstops. But we did get some nice splashes of racing, especially in the midfield. And more than expected whiplash of “OH!!! It’s that person!!!”. I will hopefully get used to the 2013 grid again after a few races 😅

But overall, a pretty decent race. As mentioned at the start of the post, I’ve already watched Malaysia, so the next race will be China, and then we’ll be in sync with the 2013 calendar!

#F1 Re watch #F1 2013 re watch #F1 Liveblog

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lukowrites · 1 year

Text

Week 8, day 6 - 20 min freewrite!

(Last one! Thank you Tim Clare, sincerely, I feel more alive thanks to these exercises, I loved it, I love writing now and I won’t stop. You’ve helped me unlock something in myself that gives me such joy, something that doesn’t require anything but my own thoughts, helping me channel and refine them, to see things within myself and in the world in a whole new way with more colour and splendor than I could have imagined. I’m addicted, and I won’t stop until I create something beautiful. I’ve never been much of a creative, but I can feel the artist in me coming out and it’s magical. I owe you one buddy. Thank you so much.)

Timclarepoet.co.uk/couchto80kwritingbootcamp – For anyone interested in getting started with, or refining their writing.

The shelf contained a litany of objects, from the most banal and recognizable: a snow globe, a pair of gardening gloves with dirt-stained fingertips, a cashew nut with a few tiny crumbs - to the most curious and strange: a hollowed out circular piece of wood with a hole in the middle, a purple ring with a thing red ribbon tied around it in a tight knot, and finally, the most curious of all, the book of wonders, as it was titled. If you open the navy blue, glittering book to the first page you’ll notice in bold green lettering a grand warning in ancient text, which when translated reads “Behold, the book of wonders! Creations of the past, present and future, a realm of infinite possibilities contained within. Careful what you wish for!” I found this book by chance one day, in the way all magical things happen to occur. I had been walking through the woods and noticed a clearing in the shape of a heart, when up in the sky there was a formation of red stars dancing around in the shape of an upside-down triangle. The lowest star began to descend, before coming closer and closer, I sheltered from it behind a nearby tree and CRASH!

In the newly formed crater in the centre of the heart, resting upon a beautiful cream-coloured pillow made of a material softer than anything I’d ever felt, was the book. I took the book and placed it in my backpack, along with the pillow, and went home.

Coming home late, I fell asleep upon the pillow, the softness comforting me and sending me to sleep so deeply I did not wake for 14 hours. In my dream, I heard a voice, which told me not to open the book until the 22nd of February, and I heeded it, feeling gratitude and respect to whatever power had bestowed this upon me. I felt that none of this was coincidence. But today, the 22nd of February, I opened it with glee.

The second page, filled me with joy. I cried a stream of tears at the sight, beauty like nothing ever seen in my lifetime. There on the page was a video of me as a young boy, my parents holding my hands on either side of me, swinging me about as we walking through the fairgrounds. Their faces beaming, looking at each other with love, looking at me with the same love, I felt I was in the arms of angels. I turned the page, there I was again, in the future, an old man, surrounded by my friends and loved ones, on my deathbed, but I was not afraid, or scared. Eager to see more, I turned the page again, this time I saw a woman and though I’d never seen her before, I felt a sense of closeness to her, of love and affection like nothing else I’d ever experienced. This was my soulmate, a woman of such warmth and kindness, kissing me on the cheek while I beamed in pure bliss. I wanted this all very badly. The feelings swelling within my heart, making me giddy with anticipation. I turned the page again, and… Nothing. A blank page, albeit for a single line that said “My name is Yves Gallardo, and I wonder…” with a space for me to write.

I retrieved my black ballpoint from my desk, knocking things over in excitement, and returned to the book to write down my thoughts. “I wonder… How I can become as full of life and happiness as the images have shown.”

Just then, the room changed.

#writing #free write #couchto80k

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thearchivistsjournal · 2 years

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Day 140,

Morning thought: the sound of thunder woke me today. I’ve grown used to regular distant rumbling like murmuring from across the room but this was more akin to shouting in my face; far less common, startling, and rude. Still I wonder what it said.

Heh… what the thunder said. A reference to a reference. The title of one story thread in a complex web of stories of a sort that I could never properly retell in the oral format used in this place that borrowed imagery and title from a passage of a poem I only read once and didn’t understand by an author of whom I only recall that I was introduced to their work at a time in my life where I couldn’t properly appreciate it.

What is the point of making a reference that no one will get? Particularly one made knowing the audience won’t get it. Is it still homage or allusion if everyone assumes it is one’s original statement? At what point does it become plagiarism? Is the point to sound clever by reiterating the thoughts of those who came before? Or is it just to hold on to a thing you loved and comfort yourself with its closeness as it bleeds into your speech? How many of my own verbal quirks and stock phrases are borrowed from things I’ve heard and read? Minor lines that should have been forgettable in the grand scheme of things but struck a chord and became etched into my patterns of thought and speech, eventually drifting so far removed from their source that everyone just figures that’s how I talk and even I forget that it was once a quote.

Or perhaps all references are made with the hope that someone will get them, even when all evidence paints the audience as unfamiliar with the source material. All for the chance of stumbling across that one person who will understand and in that moment of recognition the two of you will be in on the joke together; a connection made across the void burning all the brighter for the surrounding darkness. Even if no further words are spoken and paths never cross again, in that moment of recognized obscurity the two of you have shared a secret unknown to even your closest companions.

I’m waxing fauxlisophical again. This entry’s gone on long and Maiko is growing restless waiting for me.

Still, I find myself stormy eyed this day.

*******

I find myself pleasantly exhausted. I think I shall sleep well tonight.

The storm’s gone from one night into the other without cease. Lessening in intensity to a light shower from time to time, but at no point since yesterday has there not been some form of rain.

We stuck with Maiko’s lessons for a time. She’s making swift progress. Then again, it’s not like she was totally illiterate to start with, just unpracticed and uninformed of some of the root building blocks with which she might be able to more easily piece together the parts she was unfamiliar with. Also, it seems she’s been diligent with practice even when I’m not around. Perhaps I should begin assigning my regular students homework.

Still, diligent learner or no, it seems the two of us together have only so much patience for such activities in one day. I couldn’t quite bring myself to take the laundry all the way out to the stream that was surely overrunning its banks and running more swiftly than usual by now, so I went back to the washboard and basin I’d been making (probably incorrect) use of before I’d switched to fully river washing when the cistern ran low toward the end of the dry season. There’s certainly little concern of that happening now.

That only took so long though and as I laid garments out to dry as best I could indoors, I found myself with hours left to spend and too abnormally restless to get comfortable with any one activity.

It was then that I walked to the door with only an “I’m stepping outside” to a confused Maiko and proceeded to do just that.

A moment of closing my eyes and stretching to the endless trill of raindrops on the awning. A breath taking in a scent that I want to call petrichor but recognize as being too far into the rain for that. A descent down the steps into the precipitatous curtain.

Soaked to the bone immediately.

Slowly across the yard as I feel the mud and grass beneath my bare feet in water up to my ankles. Slowly, for I feel embarrassed. A smile tugging at the corner of my mouth as I realize I’m beyond that. Slowly still, for I’ve raised my face to the sky and have no wish to trip.

Arms raised to the sides, palms up like my face. Standing still, eyes closed, taking in the wind and rain.

Smiling in a storm.

Something said by the thunder.

A reflexive jump and cringe. Eyes open. Laughter, half-forced, half-genuine. Growing more toward the latter by the second.

A moment to pull aside the hair plastered to my face. Arms back out. Smile finished creeping into a grin. Turning in place. Slowly at first, footing unsure, water giving resistance. Picking up speed. Can I go fast enough for centripetal force to lift my hair parallel to the ground? Probably too heavy from water to work. Try anyway.

Dizziness setting in. Make use of the imbalance as the top wobbles. Transition the momentum-carried steps into something else. Stumble dance. Movement never fully stopping. Only slowing until vestibular equilibrium is regained. Arms no longer at rigid perpendiculars. Now flung out with each step. Each bend of the spine and waist. Accentuate the movements. The movements more measured. Increasing tempo.

An attempt to match to a rhythm. Many rhythms. Of the wind and rain. Of memory. Of tunes cycling through the mind of a body that lacks the skill to ever do them justice in attempting to repeat them aloud. Leave them silent save in memory. Let the observer guess at what they might be.

An observer?

A stutter of the body in motion. A smile sent that way. A wave incorporated into a scooping of the standing water that returns it to the air.

Eyes closed. A forgetting for a time. A return to the dance. Mere wild flailing to the observer. Dance to the dancer. Observed? Remember, forget.

Gyre and gambol. A grin flashing with the lightning. A knowing that the thunder will incite a jump. An unconscious decision to use the reflex instead of fighting it. Laughter at what the thunder said. A dare to the storm to take the dancer. To strike down. Not a boast but a tease. A playful utterance to a partner. Irony in how unthinkable it would be.

Sight gone dark. Exhaustion, but not that much. A sunset hidden by grey clouds gone black. Was the dance that long or did it start late?

A breathless ascent up the steps. A short distance made mountainous. Out of the rain but not nearly dry. A collapse into a seated position leaning against the house. An invitation to the observer to join next time. A bemused pronouncement of strangeness. Agreement. A request for a towel. A head shaken in disbelief, exasperation, as the observer goes to retrieve one.

Maiko brought me a towel.

Dry. Mostly anyway.

I still wound up taking shower afterward. It might have felt a bit redundant, but there was plenty of mud and bits of grass in addition to the rain. Also, it helped dispel the chill that had set in once I finally stopped.

Dinner was simple. I had worked up an appetite to eat just about anything and was too worn out to properly cook anything. Even this entry was written in the residual haze of that fevered trance. I wonder how much of it will even be intelligible to me come morning.

As I said, pleasantly exhausted. I expect to sleep well tonight.

I wonder if I will dream.

<==Previous Next==>

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addierose444 · 2 years

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My Favorite Podcasts in 2022

At the end of 2019, I published a blog post about podcasts for 2020. Back then, I was just getting into podcasts. Here’s an updated list of my favorite podcasts. Nowadays, I legitimately consider listening to podcasts to be one of my hobbies. What I love about podcasts is that they are informative and/or entertaining while also requiring low levels of engagement. Namely, they are a great companion for cooking, walks, and bike rides. I will, however, note that there is also great power in being left with our own thoughts. I wrote a bit more about this in an old post titled the power of reflection. My current podcast (and music) app of choice is Spotify. Speaking of music, here’s a post about some of my favorite songs.

The Daily

This New York Times news podcast has been a part of my morning routine for my entire college career. Legitimately, after my alarm, this is the first thing I hear each morning. I’ve written about this previously in each installment of my typical week series. New episodes are released on weekday mornings and are typically a half-hour in length. I first started listening to this podcast simply to become a bit more informed about the world. Over the years I have come to actually look forward to and enjoy each new episode. It’s the news though, so there are definitely some more difficult topics.

How I Built This with Guy Raz

This is my all-time favorite podcast. In each episode, host (and creator) Guy Raz interviews founders about their entrepreneurial journies. The stories are fascinating, but the episodes are also just so well produced. Full episodes are released on Mondays and are typically an hour in length. Nowadays, more experimental HIBT Lab! episodes are released on Thursdays. Whether or not I’d heard of the company/founder, I’ve seriously never been disappointed by an episode! Formerly an NPR podcast, this podcast is now presented by Wondery and Amazon Music. If you take nothing else away from this post, just give this podcast a listen!

Wisdom From the Top with Guy Raz

As you may have noticed from the podcast’s name, this podcast is also with Guy Raz! To be honest, I actually resisted listening to this podcast for a while. Episodes kept showing up in my How I Built This feed and I was frankly annoyed. Eventually, a specific company/leader caught my eye and I haven’t turned back since. This podcast has many of the same elements that make How I Built This great. This podcast is still with NPR and brings in leaders (lots of former CEOs) from today’s top companies. At its core, this podcast is about leadership. New hour-long episodes are released weekly on Wednesdays.

SciShow Tangents

This is a science podcast from Complexity and WNYC Studios. It is formatted like a game show which makes it very entertaining. Each episode kicks off with an original science poem and ends with a listener question and a butt fact. Back in high school, I subscribed to and regularly watched the SciShow YouTube channel. While still a great channel, the daily videos were a bit much. I find the half-hour weekly podcast episodes (released on Tuesdays) to be a lot more manageable and enjoyable.

Hidden Brain

This is a psychology podcast and like How I Built This is a former NPR podcast. New hour-long episodes are released on Mondays. I first discovered this podcast two summers ago (summer 2021), but only recently became a regular listener. If you are like me and enjoy reading psychology books, definitely give this podcast a try!

Planet Money

This is an economics podcast from NPR that really seeks to make learning about economics fun. New episodes are released on Wednesdays and Fridays and are typically 20-30 minutes in length. Compared to the other podcasts on this list, this is my least favorite. That said, it’s still a great podcast that I listen to regularly.

#college #Smith College #podcasts #The Daily #NYT #NPR #HIBT #How I Built This with Guy Raz #Guy Raz #Wisdom From the Top with Guy Raz #Hidden Brain #Planet Money #SciShow Tangents

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authornathanielryan · 2 years

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If we wind the clock back several years -- let’s say, somewhere around 2008 or 2009 – I woke up one day and had the bright idea to start making my own movies. I always thought it would be cool to have a screenwriting/filmmaking career akin to Kevin Smith or Quintin Tarantino. I wanted to have full creative control of the movies I made and I wanted to work with people that were friends. I never liked the idea of “Hollywood” filmmaking. Or as I like to call it, “Board Room Filmmaking”. Seriously, there’s nothing worse than a bunch of suits shouting out changes to your script all for the sake of money.

I decided to ask my long-time friend and brother from another mother, Keith Melcher, if he wanted to team up with me on this. I wanted to work with friends and, in my opinion, there was no better place to start than teaming up with the dude I’d spent the previous few years writing screenplays with. Boy oh boy, if either one of us had any idea what we were getting into... but that’s a story for another time. This, however, is a good opportunity for me to jump into the “screenwriting” part of the true screenwriting story.

So, there we were, poised to make our own movies. I figured since we were new to this strange world of cinema that it would be best to dip our feet in the shallow end of the pool and start with short films. I very clearly remember saying that we needed to start with something simple. Something that wouldn’t require a lot of special FX or technical knowledge. Something that would be so easy to produce, so easy to cast that there was no possible way we could screw it up. We both set out to start writing said scripts and what you see below is what I started writing... And then couldn’t stop.

I called it “Bleeder”.

If you’re looking at that photo and thinking to yourself, “But Ryan, that doesn’t look simple at all!” then you, my dear reader, would be correct. “Bleeder” is many things, but it sure as hell isn’t simple. A couple quick facts for you: First of all, this story started off as a short film I called “Saviors” and it was originally intended to be a noir-detective story (black and white movies had to be cheap to make, right??) and it was centered around our cliched lead, Detective Roth, who was trying to find a missing girl. The girl would later be revealed to have been kidnapped by... wait for it... vampires!! I know! What a twist, right?!... Am I right!?...... Yeah, I’m right.

What started as a short film quickly evolved into a shorter, more manageable web series which quickly evolved into a full, 45-minute-long TV pilot. And by quickly, I mean within the first 72 hours of the original script being written. I don’t remember which version of the script I handed to Keith but judging by how he emphasized the very low probability of us being able to make it I’m assuming it was the longer version with all the ‘splosions and the underground city of vampires and the elaborate car chases. I’m not sure when I settled on the title “Bleeder” either, but I do remember being pissed off at one point because I discovered that some other twerps had used it for their vampire web series. Thankfully, the stories couldn’t have been farther apart. And since my story was obviously cooler, I kept the title... Suck it other vampire web series!

As you can probably tell, I became pretty obsessed with “Bleeder”. So obsessed that I wasn’t satisfied writing a single pilot episode. No sir. I wrote the whole damn series. Four seasons. Eight episodes per season with the 8th episode being a 90-minute season finale. The final episode clocked in around the 2-hour mark (this was all before streaming existed, mind you so I had the Netflix format long before Netflix was a thing - POINT FOR BREWER). You can’t see it in the photo, but there’s also a lengthy series bible called “Eternus Vita” which I wrote from the perspective of one of the shows sub characters. The entire series was intended to be a Vampire epic. Most vampire stories are very isolated, usually revolving around two or three characters and locked within a single location with small-scale consequences. I figured it would be cool to do a vampire story with larger, world-wide consequences rather than the usual normal-woman-falls-for-hot-dude-who-turns-out-to-be-vampire-and-they-have-forbidden-kinky-vampire-sex-and-hot-vampire-dude-dies-because-human-dude-is-righteous/jealous/incel-and kills hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiim....... You can't hear it but I did a voice while I was writing that...

To this day, “Bleeder” is the story that if I made it tomorrow, I could die happy the next day. Fulfilled. Satisfied. Mayhap complete. I even slapped an official copyright on it just in case. I never did re-writes on it. What you see are the original first drafts (and I promise you they read like first drafts). Don’t let the file dates fool you either. I’m fairly certain I began writing bleeder in 2008 or 09 at the latest. Migration from different computers and newer versions of Final Draft however automatically updates the last time the files were opened as is clear by season 4, episode 7 which I obviously opened today (as of this writing).

A lot has changed and I always wanted to re-write them. It would be a necessary evil no matter what especially since I’ve had time to develop new back stories for some of my favorite characters. Lena comes to mind. She’s always been my favorite and she was the only one that didn’t originally have a backstory. It took over a decade to get there, but her backstory eventually came to me and I was overwhelmed with the desire to revisit this series. In fact, the short film I made two years ago called “Familiar” was intended to take place in the same universe and Lena was originally supposed to play a big part in the feature film version. The feature film then inspired me to do re-writes (which I clearly have yet to start).

I’d still like to see it get made. Some day. Preferably before I go blind...

#screenwriting #horror #vampire #vampire goth #scriptwriting #series

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