#i prefer brit smith

[v4low3rtsuka2a4an]

Jojo izzat you 😨

[wolfdude-8]

Karma's a beach.

I watched both Jojo Siwa and Brit Smith's music videos, clearly lol. Personally, I prefer Brit's music video and song overall, but I'll admit I love JoJo's outfit for her music video (even if it's a pain in the ass to replicate). What can I say? Early 2000's-2010's music is just my favorite kind of music (probably because of nostalgia, not gonna lie).

[novumtimes]

Sam Smith at the Proms review: Singer promises to stay clothed in rich soulful and entirely appropriate performance

Sign up to Roisin O’Connor’s free weekly newsletter Now Hear This for the inside track on all things music Get our Now Hear This email for free Yesterday was Tchaikovsky and tomorrow is Elgar. But tonight is Sam Smith. And there’s an air of not quite knowing what to expect in the Royal Albert Hall before the debut Prommer takes to the stage. This Prom with the BBC Concert Orchestra is billed as a retrospective look at Smith’s debut album, In the Lonely Hour, released a decade ago. But when the concert was announced in April, the BBC was moved to reassure people that it would be “entirely appropriate for the Proms and entirely appropriate for the audience in attendance”. Why? Because 32-year-old Smith, who is non-binary and uses the preferred pronouns they/them, has proved themselves to be one of our most controversial pop stars. Recent live shows have seen them dance in a corset and shake their bare bottom. Promo videos have been set in wild, sexually-charged house parties. Regulator Ofcom received more than 100 complaints about Smith’s performance of “Unholy”, their song with German singer Kim Petras, at the 2023 Brit Awards after a leather-clad Smith donned a hat with devil horns, and two dancers shared a long and passionate kiss. Crikey, thought traditionalists. Would this hallowed hall become a land of grope and fury? Well, no. Wearing a smart double-breasted black suit, Smith addresses the issue head-on a few minutes into the show, using a form of words I’ll wager have never been uttered at a Prom before. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to get my bum out,” says Smith. “The clothes are staying on. This is an appropriate show. Even I know there’s a time and a place.” What we get instead is a night of soulful music, a mixture of Smith originals and cover versions. Backed by swooning orchestration and the 17-piece LJ Singers choir, Smith’s voice is showcased in its raw form. Motown-tinged early track “I’m Not the Only One”, from In the Lonely Hour, proves itself to be a modern soul-gospel classic. The sense of a trump card being played too soon is put to rest with “Like I Can”, which rolls like thunder thanks to timpani and dramatic stings. Throughout, Smith introduces guests including their early singing teacher Joanna Eden and jazz singer Clare Teal. A version of Joni Mitchell’s “Both Sides Now” is tender; you could hear a pin drop in the audience, which includes documentarian Louis Theroux. Meanwhile a duet with backing singer LaDonna Young, “Lay Me Down”, features vocal gymnastics that would challenge Simone Biles for a medal. I’ve always found Smith’s voice slightly shrill. But it’s rich and sonorous here, particularly on “Writing’s on the Wall”, their theme to the 2015 James Bond film Spectre. Who can fail to be moved by hearing a Bond theme played by a live orchestra? It’s special. Smith in a Vivienne Westwood crimson ballgown (BBC / Andy Paradise ) After the interval, Smith appears in a vast Vivienne Westwood crimson ballgown, with gloves, a sash and train (come on, what did you expect?). The stage is bedecked with claret flowers. We get lovely covers of “Fever” and “My Funny Valentine”, and even an orchestral “Unholy”, during which the dreaded devil-horned hat makes an appearance. They end with “Somewhere Over the Rainbow”, a nod to Judy Garland’s famous 1961 concert at Carnegie Hall, one of their favourite ever vocal performances. If not quite a back to basics approach, then Smith’s only UK live show this year allows them to consolidate their position as a singer rather than a controversialist. The music is given room to breathe. It is, as things turn out, entirely appropriate. Source link via The Novum Times

[maximuswolf]

Brit Smith should have never returned to the music industry

Brit Smith should have never returned to the music industry I might get some flak for this and I can understand that but genuinely let's just face the facts. Brit Smith should have never returned to the music industry. While I prefer her version of Jojo Siwa's song Karma which was released 12 years ago. I do think Brit Smith returning was a big mistake 😭. She is not going to have any significant success because people only know her because of Jojo Siwa. She also planned to release an EP within a matter of weeks which I'm sure she knew wasn't gonna be possible and it never happened. An EP can't just be demo songs from 2012, she would have to re-record them and so it's taking a longer time than expected. I can tell she doesn't really want to be famous now at this stage of her career and I don't blame her, after all those years but people need to be more realistic and stop saying she needs to return to the music industry. Submitted May 21, 2024 at 01:29PM by pinkvenqm https://ift.tt/d74puPE via /r/Music

[lazyreadingbythepool]

In the laundry 

Script by 

 L.Romanova 

    / Active persons 1.Mr.Smith, 2. Owner of the laundry, 3. Client,4.Client2.

  The  owner of the laundry.

    - Hello, Mr. Smith, that you brought   today? The last set of your socks?   Mr Smith: -Yes, please, and my ties too, I want to reanimate them slightly.     Owner :-Mr. Smith, you are our VIP client, the proud of our laundry.  When you  will marry finally, the wife will wash you regularly.

Mr.Smith:-Oh, darling,  I am a free eagle in flight and it is difficult  to catch me in the trap of marriage. And why do I need a wife? I have a slowcoooker!

 Client1.- This man really  smells like a cheese.

 Client 2.-And what are you surprised? All old bachelors smell like this. This is the smell of mold.

Mr.Smith -. I apologize, do not forget that Penicillin-is savior of mankind was created from  the mold as well! 

Client2. Still, very caustic stench, in my opinion, these are your socks.

Mr.Smith . - Oh, it is not because of the socks! I just had at the exhibition-tasting of cheeses and wines. Here I took a piece of cheese for dinner. It is lay in the most prominent place, and the sock used as a package. Local Food Hall organized an exhibition in Town Hall.Do you know crackers, a glass of wine, assorted cheeses and other delicacies. O, Heaven! I had a good launch and all this for free!

Client2-. Yes, we-Brits, we love bargain.

Mr.Smith -You know, I sometimes work as a freelancer in MEN news and on the way here made a sketch of today's article. Listen! 

   "Today in Town Hall,was organized an exhibition" Vintage Wines and Retro Cheeses ". Exhibits were provided by the leading European luxury brands  in the field of winemaking and cheese producing. We are all proud that the event organizers chose exactly our city. Town Hall is ideal for this noble goal. All these medieval stone carvings are created by an amazing interior for a secular event of international importance. In recent years, colossal work has been taken on the selection of odors and tastes As a result, a new cheese" French kiss "was developed and introduced into production, a new triumph in the food industry. He-he! We understand the patriotism and the Gallian humor of the French, when they came up with such a name" French kiss ". 

Client1:. - This "kiss" smells like a nonwashed-crotch. 

Owner:-. O,sorry, this smell is from here,a delivery of a local nursing home. 

 Don't  interrupt! Please, Mr. Smith, we all listen to you carefully.

 Mr.Smith:....OK," Vintage Wines and retro cheeses are a secular event for a local beaumont. Cheese "French Kiss" was the last development of technologists and released as a "Limited Edition"  in a single copy at the moment, and recently received a reward in the "The most smelly cheeses of France".

Client 1:.- So what, you,stole the  only article from the exhibition!?

Mr.Smith:-..Oh,no one even noticed, but when I carried it out of the..Hall ,everyone breathed a sign of relief.a masterpiece of the elegant and luxury products. And as the final accord of the show was served  Swiss garlic soup in elegant glasses, which gave the festive atmosphere to the whole event.

  Client 1: - I love French onion soup!

  Client 2.- Tell me, and they have a discount for cheeses, 50% preferably?

Owner :- Products of luxury brands is not recommended to lower in price, it undermines the company's image.

Mr.Smith :-. God forbid!!! Luxury goods and even more , renomed cheeses, no shelf life than they are older, the better smell. They are covered by noble patina so to speak.

Client 2:. - Yes, they are just rotten !!

Owner :. - With you it is  so nice to communicate, I always recognize something new for myself.

Client 1:. -All aristocrats in 3rd generation adore sustained drinks and piquancy. It's their main food.They are all sofisticated gourmet society. 

Client 2.-Yes? I am not surprised that they all develop a hereditary gout with age.

Owner :. - It's just a commercial trick to sell stail goods.  

Client 2:.-To-another post Christmas campaign of a rotten food discount. I am not surprised, our marketers know how to make a 🍬 candy from shit. They are always looking for new ideas….

/ to be continued…😎/

[hopelessromanticlittleshit]

“That’s what love is, this matter of hopeful travel against the usual deeply troubling odds.” Seasonal quartet, part trois. Going against what you might have assumed, I found Spring to be probably the most disheartening entry into the quartet so far. Immigration and the global migrant crisis are the centrals issues in Spring. And while you usually think of spring as a period of rebirth one of the character’s is dealing with the loss of a loved one. And the emotional turmoil he is experiencing leads him to get on a train to Scotland with no particular destination in mind and for no particular reason. There he meets a young girl, Florence, and Brit, who works at a detention centre. I don’t often like VERY modern books with VERY modern references. But that’s just the little old lady in me, who is a tiny bit nostalgic. Or the snob in me, who prefers a “period piece”. But something about the way Ali Smith writes makes it all very urgent and very necessary. A time capsule of our lives. All of this sounds pretty dismal but Ali Smith brings such a light touch to everything she does. Once again referencing so much art and artists. This time Katherine Mansfield, Charlie Chaplin, Shakespeare, Rilke, Beethoven… SO. GOOD! Also a couple of short paragraphs that are straight up fun to read out loud. One being basically an internet troll’s unhinged unpunctuated rant. Disgusting. Hilarious. Terrifying. Infuriating. “Books. Knowledge. Years of reading. All of which means? I know stuff.” https://www.instagram.com/p/Cl8eNYwr2cX/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[firespirited]

I have a lot of thoughts on The Sandman but first off a quick heads up: this isn’t “Good Omens but make it goth”. There are bunch of episodes that are light and a bunch that really are not. Please check the trigger warnings as netflix provides none and you will be blindsided if you expect just gore with no violence against women and children.

readmore for length. Quick reminder that I only critique in depth the things that really matter. A middling piece of media gets a meh, a bad gets “here’s what’s naf”, what’s really good and potentially great with a capital G gets the full dissection:

So I’m one of the few people who loves an anthology: any format, any genre! And I think The Sandman would have worked better as a series of stories tied to Dream (despite the original comic having Dream have a growth journey - yes I know it’s not deviating from the OG) I understand most people prefer a character arc, especially when being introduced to a new universe but for me Gaiman’s stories work best as individual stories loosely tied together by a common thread and pack a punch when they come together as facets of a whole (here’s where I stop myself from a full american gods S1 review LOL). I would have much preferred that approach rather than Dream’s journey punctuated by story episodes. As it stands, dude’s a compelling actor, it’s just that the story appears to lag between the time that’s important and relevant to show Dream’s PTSD/long term issues (and the scope of his existence) and the urgency of what’s happening in other episodes. You basically have two timelines playing out: one for contemplation and one for action and when they’re both at the forefront they clash. Binge watching makes your brain want to choose a speed and stick to it. Trust that this actually works better as episodes and let yourself digest each one with a rewatch even if you binged to please the algorithm.

Another thing that was jarring was how much this is a British show with british actors but set in America, someone would pull out a gun or go to get “gas” and wait weren’t we in London, this car has two brits and a rottweiler in it 😂 where am I? I was regularly confused about when and where we were... and the binge watching format didn’t help.

----------------------------------------

Skip if you already know that an anti woke review is a symptom of systemic toxic conservatism: I'd like to talk plainly about the reason this show distresses many of the reviewers complaining about “diversity”. They aren’t exposed to that many dark skin black men and women in natural hairstyles, not many brown or asian middle to upper class people, they’re not used to normal bisexuality and gender non conformity on their tv screen because we have deliberately created a very watered down, whitewashed, boxed in version of diversity these past decades designed to tick boxes without being threatening: the black female character is usually lightskinned with eurocentric features, the lesbians are all white high femme middle class, bisexuals basically have a special ‘danger slutty’ way of walking and talking that it might as well be tattooed on their forehead, androgynous characters are lone outliers and ***everyone stays in their lane*** so layered and fluid characters feel like big boundaries are being crossed.

What they’re not willing to say in those angry reviews is: the masc dark skinned black man in a suit was an executive with those dreadlocks and also a former fitness coach who felt fat, was open to bisexuality and not good at sex according to his wife, and they love eachother even though they don’t like eachother anymore. And that’s way too much layering for what’s usually a 2D stereotype. And that’s only one of so many characters. They think the only way someone like that would exist is if they were made up... because they live in segregated neighbourhoods, go to segregated colleges and segregated jobs with hairstyle and grooming requirements where Jada Smith is asking for it by not wearing a wig at a fancy “proper” event like the Oscars... or maybe they have blinkers on everytime they take the train I don’t know. Then they’re also surprised when those “different” people like to live together and be friends together. Go figure.

At this point I assume no-one speaking AAVE is using the word woke anymore because maga/gammon people have taken it and turned it into the new “PC culture” if not an outright signifier of racism and very narrow sexual tolerance. I would very much like an extension that auto blocks any review or article that uses the word woke because it’s always trash, useless sewage clogging up the internet tubes and making places like IMDB or amazon reviews un-usable to the general public. It’s spam that makes comments sections, social media and reviews not just pointless but sickening to wade into. We’re stuck in our bubbles because venturing out of curated moderated spaces is now a firehose of foxnews/terfy outrage because there’s money to be made from outrage and people happy to make these once neutral places into hate swamps. There’s no polarization on both sides: there’s people who want to exist in peace and pitchfork holding mobs who want them dead. It’s exhausting.

/rant

------------------------------------

Ok I’ve talked about the two pacings and use of time, the usa/uk confusion and the good character layering. I’d like to talk about the use of space and scope relating to emotions and I’m having trouble finding the right words. It’s not that the CGI is bad, it’s some very good CGI. It’s just at times the scale felt wrong Hell felt like a wasteland and then a dense trek, then the throne room was clean and cramped but also way too spacious. At times it was very obvious they were filming on a small backdrop made to look big with echo-y sound but the characters lack of interaction with the scenery meant it never felt real. Stuff like that. Just off. The first two episodes are near impeccable: the wind and humidity matches the space, the creatures are real looking. It’s later on that it’s starts to feel mismatched. At the end of ep3 the london addict’s flat felt too roomy, it had clutter but not the dirt and decay, it was a strange quality dropoff.

Then you’ve got what’s supposed to be a big emotional climax for Rose that’s done with a series of dreamscapes being merged and collapsed in CGI and it’s utterly hollow compared to the raw emotion she felt earlier in a small room watching someone fall apart. Her, and our, tether is to the people she loves and the huge set pieces take away from that. I think it’s just not something that translates the emotional core well and actually would pack a far stronger wallop with 6 people sat on folding chairs in a small blank room taking to eachother about the emotional impact of feeling violated that their dreams and nightmares are visible to eachother and blurring with reality.

It’s hard to watch when you know these are character actors who can pull off that kind of riveting raw acting. A CGI hurricane in a vast field does not convey the mental devastation of feeling exposed nor of losing grip on reality. It makes the internal visceral ache into an external visual metaphor that doesn’t hurt. CGI could have been used in a more intimate setting: all of the symbology could have been projected onto people trying to hold on to eachother.

It’s a very interesting contrast with the diner episode which does the same thing with no massive spectacle required, the transgression of saying thoughts is enough to be violent - far before any actual violence happens. These people we’ve come to love being laid emotionally bare with some visual effects and mostly words would have broken me into tiny pieces.

What i’m trying to say is that we dream and feel big but these things are inside: I felt that kid crinkle the little yellow post-it in his hand far stronger than anything in the vivid and horrifying dreams. For me and those I know well, mental illness and half waking nightmares manifest in all sorts of small gestures and sounds of distress, self soothing and self harm, it’s a claustrophobic experience which doesn’t take away from the large impact.

Not really sure how to explain how some story locations and pacing and tone felt too small and others too big for what they were trying to make us feel. The medium of tv and episodes is right, the length of the episodes is right, the actors are very good, the costuming excellent, this is very high quality storytelling, the emotional core is there and yet it’s sometimes at a distance because it wasn’t always given the correct beat and focus at the right time between other beats. If that makes any sense at all.

There is a special cramped uglyness to the comics that makes it scratchy and gnawing: something they’ve managed to capture with the actors closeups but not necessarily with the storyboarding of these visually larger ideas.

[filmforwomen]

do you have any literature recs? preferably w|w or strong female presence

hi! yes i do have some recs. some of these i have read and some of them are on my to read list:

animals by emma jane unsworth

the gallery of unfinished girls by lauren karcz

the joy luck clyb by amy tan

the color purple by alice walker

girl,woman, others by bernardette evaristo

the secret life of bees by sue monk kidd

swing time by zadie smith

the vanishing half by brit bennett

electric archer by eve l. ewing

lote by shola von reinhold

cherry beach by laura mcphee-browne

blueberries: essays concerning understanding by ellena savage

thing we lost in the fire by mariana enriquez

[amphtaminedreams]

Filling the Met Shaped Hole (No, Not Like That): The Best Red Carpet Looks of Awards Season 2020

Hi to anyone reading,

I want to jump straight into things and ask a question. Which is the best Met Gala theme of the last 5 years and why is it Heavenly Bodies: Fashion and the Catholic Imagination?

Seriously though, despite the fact that I’m not sure anything will top Heavenly Bodies with the preceding and succeeding Met Galas being relatively disappointing (the camp theme definitely could have been taken further and lets not even talk about the Comme Des Garcons disaster), I still get excited for the gala every year, staying up til whatever hour of the morning so I can see all the fashion live. Of course, it makes complete sense that this year’s event has been postponed until October given the circumstances but the chosen theme of Fashion and Duration had the potential to be quite interesting, so I hope we do eventually get to see it; whilst I don’t miss endlessly scrolling through photos of every white male celebrity wearing the exact same suit and tie to the point where fangirls claim Harry Styles to be a pioneer of breaking gender norms because he wore a pink top, I long for the days where we could all temporarily coexist in peace and harmony thanks to the internet’s collective dragging of the Kardashians for paying no attention to the theme whatsoever. We should’ve guessed life as we know it was about to be flipped on its head when they actually turned up in something interesting last year.

What I’m trying to say is that I would love nothing more than to jump back in time to when tomorrow morning’s top Google search would be best Met Gala looks, and not how many lives did Boris Johnson’s fuckery cost us today. So in honour of the lack of trivial content, I thought I’d fill the Met shaped hole in our lives (amongst many other unfilled holes; today the freezer door at work hit me on the ass whilst I was putting ice cubes out and I think for a split second I got all flushed) by putting together a collection of my personal favourite red carpet looks from this year’s awards season and their respective afterparties: the BAFTAs, Brits, Critic’s Choice Awards, Golden Globes, Oscars, SAG Awards, and the Grammys to finish with.

Enjoy!

British Academy of Film and Television Arts Award (yes, that’s the BAFTAs but I needed a longer title)

(L-R: Zoe Kravitz in Dior, Rooney Mara in Givenchy, and Scarlett Johansson in Versace)

I am a British fan of television and arts but I will gladly say it: of all the awards ceremonies, the BAFTAs is hardly the most exciting, and the red carpet even less so. As I said, lots of boring men in boring suits and middle aged women being dressed by stylists who seem to think we’re dead from the neck down by the time we hit 40 and dress us accordingly so. Any hint of a décolletage explicitly forbidden.

There were a few good looks, however. From left to right, above we have Zoe Kravitz in Dior, Rooney Mara in Givenchy and Scarlett Johansson in Versace, who looks so amazing I almost forget that 1). Versace is going down the drain and 2). Scarlett Johansson would stand in front of a forest and take the role of a tree if she could. Which, along with her whole defence of Woody Allen, is really shit-she’s genuinely great in Marriage Story and an otherwise talented actress. As for Zoe Kravitz, she is up there with Robert Pattison as one of my biggest crushes right now and looks amazing in literally everything she wears, and Rooney Mara is consistently low-key yet elegantly dressed. 

(L-R: Greta Gerwig in Gucci, Florence Pugh in Dries Van Noten, Renee Zellweger in Prada)

Renee Zellweger proved an exception to the rule when it came to women over the age of 40 generally having clueless stylists-her dress is beautiful, very reminiscent of the delicate, demure beauty of 50s icons such as Grace Kelly and Audrey Hepburn. Florence’s dress, I actually really loved. It didn’t seem to go down all too well with actual Florence Pugh fans but red and pink together is an elite combo; I’m still firmly on the “surprised that it works but I’m into it” train. I mainly included Greta’s dress for the green velvet, to be honest; it’s disappointingly low-key for Gucci but nice enough all the same.

(L-R: Andrew Scott in Paul Smith, Charlize Theron in Dior, Daisy Ridley in Oscar de la Renta, and Emilia Clarke in Schiaparelli)

I was particularly excited to see Emilia Clarke in Schiaparelli-yes, I adore her because she played Daenerys Targaryen and I was ride or die for that bitch but also whenever I see her interviewed she has the most exuberant energy and honestly I want to be best friends. It’s not the most interesting dress Schiaparelli has ever put out there, but I like the fact that she went for something unique all the same.

Forest green is a colour I find hard to resist which is why I included Andrew Scott’s otherwise kinda basic suit (points for it being velvet) and Daisy Ridley in Oscar de la Renta. As elegant as the dress is, I would love for her stylist to have really leaned into the forest nymph vibes I’m getting and do something a bit less uptight with the hair and makeup; like imagine loose curls with tiny braids and hair rings and a dark lip and a slight smoke around the eye and...yes, I have very specific visions, I know. As for Charlize Theron, her work with Dior is the only reason I care about the brand; there’s definitely a case to be made here for giving Maria Grazia the benefit of the doubt, assuming that she tries all the prototypes on women who look like Charlize and that that’s why she’s happy to send dresses that are otherwise relatively underwhelming down the runway. 

The Brit Awards

(L-R: Charli XCX in Fendi, Ellie Goulding in Koche, Hailee Steinfeld in Fendi, and Harry Styles in Gucci)

In my opinion a much better reflection of quintessential British style than the BAFTAs, I originally ruled out including any music award ceremony red carpets in this post until I saw Maya Jama and Charli XCX’s looks. Consider me pleasantly surprised by Hailee Steinfeld’s cobalt blue burnout dress, a classic incarnation of the regal bohemian aesthetic Fendi channelled in their 2019 haute couture show. Plus Charli’s emo take on Glinda the Good Witch is also Fendi, driving home for me just how much I love their collections. I don’t know if I’d be sure about Ellie Goulding’s dress on the rack but the simple styling makes it work and she looks gorgeous, and Harry Styles looks just as pretty in a Gucci look that is MADE for him.

(L-R: Adwoah Aboah in Vivienne Westwood, Celeste in Gucci on the far right! I’m not sure who the guy in the middle is, I’m sorry and if anybody knows drop me a message and I will correct this immediately!)

Unfortunately, Harry Styles and Celeste didn’t get to pose together because this is really a perfect his and hers Gucci look; I feel like seeing one outfit next to the other would really highlight the quirky elegance of each. That being said, it feels criminal to talk about elegance without including Adwoah Aboah in Vivienne Westwood in the sentence; the dress is obviously stunning quality on its own merit, but Adwoah is what elevates it from unremarkable to ethereal. Fuck the weird ass knight figure that’s currently on top of the Brit Award, this woman is the definition of statuesque! Put her on top of the trophy you cowards!

And just to get it out of the way, when it comes to the guy in the middle, to quote Keke Palmer:

Sorry to this man.

Honestly, I saved all the red carpet photos from a Nylon (I think it was Nylon?) article back when the awards aired and towards the end of the photos they stopped including names-this happened a few times when I was looking through red carpet galleries. I reverse image searched where I could but not every photo turned anything up. If anyone does know who this man is, message me so I can include his name. He looks sick, and as far as suits go, this one is built upon and accessorised enough that it’s actually a look rather than the same old variation of a suit we’ve seen a million times before that may as well be the straight man’s designated red carpet uniform. 

(L-R: Maya Jama, Neh Neh Cherry in Bottega Veneta, Laura Whitmore)

And now the woman that forced me to include the Brits red carpet in this post in the first place: Maya Jama. Don’t get me wrong, my mind isn’t blown by this dress on its own, I probably prefer Laura Whitmore’s (Jaded do a similar newspaper dress and I’ve resisted adding it to my basket for 6 months now, this is the ultimate test of whether or not I finally cave), but Maya looks fucking MAGNIFICENT. The fit, the gloves, the confidence with which she carries it, it’s all SO good. Considering the timing, this is basically her Princess Diana revenge dress levelled up, 2020′s Jessica Rabbit moment. 

(L-R: Maya Jama, Ellie Goulding, Kendall Jenner)

Obviously anything is gonna be a step down from the red carpet look but Maya’s Brits afterparty outfit was cute too, if a tad Pretty Little Thing. 

Don’t ask me what Kendall Jenner was doing at the Brits afterparty btw, because I have no idea. We live in a world where the Kardashian-Jenners just seem to occupy every public space possible and I’ve begrudgingly accepted it at this point. I don’t have the energy to question it-and it helps that green catsuit is actually Very Cool™. 

For the last of my favourite Brit Awards looks, we have a few more afterparty photos-from left to right we have Charli XCX again, Lizzo, and Anne Marie. It was Charli posting her dress on Instagram that sent me searching for afterparty looks in the first place; apparently wearing nothing but feathers and crystals is something that appeals to me, and the more I read that statement, the more it sounds spot-on. I’d categorise it as gothic glamour hoe, and slot it in with the rest of the night-out clothes in my wardrobe that I think I’ll finally have the balls to wear out of sheer desperation once this lockdown is over. The Blossom to Charli XCX’s Buttercup here, we’ve also got Anne Marie looking extra AF and I loveeeee it; it’s an ensemble somewhere between a high-end version of Alaska Thunderfuck’s candyfloss Sugar Ball dress from season 5 of Drag Race (Alaska DID deserve to win AS2 nation, rise up) and a low-key version of a Katy Perry California Dreams Tour costume. I don’t call it low-key as a drag, just a regretful admission of the fact that maybe wearing a cupcake bra which squirts whipped cream out of the boobs is a bit too much for most of us. 

Critic’s Choice Awards

(L-R: Alison Brie in Brandon Maxwell, Chloe Bridges in Azeeza, Cynthia Erivo in Fendi, Florence Pugh in Prada)

I was going to say the Critic’s Choice Awards is kind of America’s version of the BAFTAs but then I remembered that the BAFTAs is really the only big TV and film awards ceremony we have here in the UK and that it’s kind of sad that I have to compare our most high-profile red carpet of the year to L.A’s most low-key one. Getting Cynthia Erivo and Florence Pugh to infiltrate is the best we can do. 

THAT BEING SAID! 

They both look amazing. This is Florence’s best red carpet look of this year, imo (she the prettiest icicle I’ve ever seen), and Cynthia Erivo’s arm must ache from serving the entire awards season. And in Fendi! Taste!

Side note before we move onto the next set of looks: has anybody else watched Alison Brie in Mad Men and Community simultaneously and experienced the extreme cognitive dissonance that comes from watching her play a tragically nerdy (relatable tbh) 18 year old and an overly-sophisticated 30 something married to an ad man in the 60s at the same time? Weird, but anyway! The orange dress with the red lipstick is channelling Marina Diamandis’ Froot era style subtle sex appeal and is a timeless, playful combo. Put the hair up into a beehive and it’s Megan Draper on a date in Cabo-don’t know much about the place but I know the sea is aqua and the sun seekers are blindingly white and the cocktails are plentiful (and whatever colour you want them to be), and all that together is a juicy palette if we’re talking cinematography. The Mad Men directors are out there somewhere shaking their fists at the sky that they never got to consult me on that, I’m sure. 

(L-R: Phoebe Waller-Bridge in Dior, Saoirse Ronan in Erdem and Zendaya in Tom Ford)

Zendaya’s red carpet look was the stand out of the Critic’s Choice Awards for sure; the skirt I can do without but I hope that hot pink metal breastplate ends up on display somewhere because that is ART, and she is the perfect person to wear it. The Tiffany Pollard “she's so powerful” meme was made for this moment. 

Also, can we talk about Phoebe Waller-Bridge backing up my Dior 2019 Haute Couture wasn’t *that* bad hypothesis? Because unless I’m mistaken this is one of the dresses from that collection and it is quite beautiful. Yeah, black mesh isn’t going to start a revolution or anything but it’s so delicate looking it almost seems out of place on a red carpet-I don’t know if it’s the structure of the bodice or the tulle but I can totally see this in a gothic ballet, whether that’s sensible in theory or not. Probably not. But then again I did quit ballet when I was 10 after months of getting people to near poke me in the eye on the way out of class so it would look like I’d been crying and I didn’t have to go to my lessons after school. So what do I know? Fuck all, in case that wasn’t clear. I also feel a little vindicated by Saoirse wearing one of the Erdem dresses I loved from last year’s collection-if multi-award winning actress Saoirse Ronan’s probably ridiculously well-paid stylist liked it enough to pick it out for her then I guess I’m doing okay in terms of taste levels.

(L-R: Olivia Wilde in Valentino, Lucy Hale in Miu Miu, Mandy Moore in Elie Saab, and Margaret Qualley in Chanel)

The last few Critics Choice Awards looks I picked out above aren’t thrilling or anything but they’re cute enough to include-from left to right we have Olivia Wilde in Valentino, Lucy Hale in Miu Miu, Mandy Moore in Elie Saab and Margaret Qualley in Chanel. It’s kind of besides the point, but Margaret worked with Chanel throughout awards season and I just wanted to add my two cents in here and say that I think she’s the perfect person to collaborate with (also think Laura Harrier would be a good match, anyone agree?) and that in a similar vein, I urge Miu Miu, the creative directors of which I’m sure are eagerly awaiting the opinion of irrelevant Tumblr user amphtaminedreams, to work with Lucy Hale more often. I feel like if girl stopped starring in those shitty Blumhouse horrors and did something a bit more sophisticated she’d fit the brand right down to a T.

The Golden Globes

(L-R: Cynthia Erivo in Thom Browne, Dakota Fanning in Dior, Jane Levy in Steven Khalil, and Janina Gavankar in Georges Chakra)

Finally! I hear you cry! A more exciting red carpet! It’s not the Oscars, but celebrity stylists still pulled the big guns for this one, the Golden Globes probably being considered the second most prestigious American awards ceremony of the year. Plus Dakota Fanning was there! Big yay for me! She and Elle can practically do no wrong in my eyes and are probably the only 2 women that could take on Dakota Johnson and Jennifer Lawrence when it comes to established red carpet style. 

Cynthia Erivo did it again, of course, as slick, as dignified and as regal as she was at the Critic’s Choice. The woman really has got this power stance thing locked down; she always seems so cool and confident in everything she wears that the whole getting dressed up to go out out out (we call going to the club going “out out”, but I’d say a red carpet is a slightly bigger deal than my local club with the sticky floors hence the 3rd out) thing looks like second nature.

(L-R: Zoey Deutch in Fendi, Karamo Brown in Grayscale, Lucy Boynton in Louis Vuitton and Kat Graham in Georges Hobeika)

Lucy Boynton was another of my Golden Globes stand outs, and in general is someone who I really look forward to seeing at red carpet events. She (or her stylist, I don’t know how much of a role she plays!) always seems to commit fully to an outfit and sees it as part of a whole concept where the makeup, hair and accessories are equally as important and that is a girl after my own heart. 60s space age empress is the theme here and I’m all about it-well, either that or a feminine editorial take on the tinman from the Wizard of Oz but the former sounds a bit cooler and does way more justice to how good she looks so we’ll go with that. Quick shoutout to Kat Graham too because she looked absolutely radiant. 

(L-R: Shailene Woodley in Balmain, Winnie Harlow in Laquan Smith, and Zoe Kravitz in Saint Laurent)

The trio above I really couldn’t skim over, Winnie Harlow especially; my America’s Next Top Model grudges aside, she consistently turns it out at every event she’s invited to. She’s another woman that wears pieces with such confidence that they look like they were actually made on her body-even if the garment itself isn’t the most breathtaking in the room, she’s the one that draws my attention. Though she’s got these dainty, other-worldly qualities about her, what you’d expect to be a gentle presence is firm and commanding and whilst the sharp drama and glitz of the dress probably helps, that’s just the way Winnie Harlow is naturally, based on her other red carpet appearances. 

Zoe Kravitz is an interesting one because, on the one hand, her looking amazing with that bone structure (I would trade a vital organ to look like that any day) is a given, but it does also seem like she went out of her way to do something a bit different this past awards season. I have always loved her street style for its trademark edge and the androgynous, oversized silhouettes that she leans towards, and the overt femininity of her red carpet dresses is that grungy, skater girl aesthetic completely flipped on its head. It’s cute, and if anyone can pull a dress as kitschy as this off, it’s Zoe. She’s got that just rolled out of bed look we all dream of that screams “I’m over this shit” whereas the rest of us have to rely on dark circles to get the message across. It’s very weird to think that she and Shailene Woodley were in Divergent together, especially since Zoe in particular has changed so much since. 

My main note with Shailene was just that I got excited to see that Balmain dress off the runway-it was one of my favourites from the S/S 2020 collection (IIRC, mostly on the basis that I’m pretty sure it wan’t haute couture), and it looks good! Not wildly good because I’m not sure the fit of the dress is inherently all that flattering, but still good-she makes it work.

(L-R: Taylor Swift in Etro, Sofia Carson in Giambattista Valli and Scarlett Johansson in Vera Wang)

I know a lot of people online didn’t seem to like Taylor Swift’s dress, but she looks cute, imo. I will say that I’m surprised it’s Etro! At first glance I would’ve thought Carolina Herrera or Oscar de la Renta or something along those lines. And predictably, I think Sofia Carson looks flawless. If you’ve read any of my other posts you’re probably sick of hearing it but I really can’t resist anything that is this modern Disney princess, like powder pink layered tulle? Feathers? What did you expect me to say, ew? I think deep down my clothing preferences will always be that of a 9 year old girl and you know what, that’s okay. Sometimes. Well, when it comes to red carpets. That’s when you can kinda get away with it.

(L-R: Bell Powley in Miu Miu, Billy Porter in Alex Vinash, and Charlize Theron in Dior)

There’s a few things worth mentioning when it comes to the above outfits. Firstly, and most importantly, I need to proclaim my love for Billy Porter. No man is doing it like him, honestly. To compare Harry Styles in his pink suits is unfair. The drama and the beauty and the flair that Billy brings every awards ceremony is on another level and that’s all I have to say about that. If you disagree, I’m gonna need a bullet pointed essay-I am that firm in my opinion.

Second, Bell Powley in Miu Miu semi confirms the direction their PR team tend to head in when choosing women to work with. I might be totally alone here but I feel like she and Lucy Hale both have one of those porcelain doll faces which work really well with Miu Miu’s signature girlish silhouettes and overly-ornate details. 

And thirdly, just to restate my earlier point: someone give Charlize Theron a pat on the back for bringing some life to a Dior design. That is all.

(L-R: Jodie Comer in Mary Katrantzou, Joey King in Schiaparelli and Kaitlyn Dever in Valentino)

All the newcomers really turned it out too, which is a sentence I type through gritted teeth; to call Jodie Comer of My Mad Fat Diary origins a newcomer pains the former depressing 2013 black and white Tumblr user in me, though I suppose to the US audiences uncultured in the ways of British teenage angst Vilanelle is her breakthrough role. And how Vilanelle is this dress too!? It’s bold and it’s attention-grabbing and it’s fun and it is definitely very theatrical female fictional villain that you were inexplicably drawn to as a child before you realised why as an adult-”oh, it’s because she was hot”. 

Joey King in Iris van Herpen was a pleasant surprise too considering that when I first looked through the red carpet photos I only knew her as the girl who was in that shitty Netflix original-having watched her in The Act, I apologise for the dismissal! And I admire the sartorial choice! I adore Iris van Herpen designs but as a short girl, wearing one of her dresses to a red carpet event is a risky decision-I hate to admit it because casting a diverse range of people for shows is something I have come to expect of my favourite brands, but the appeal of a lot of IvH pieces comes from the movement of the garments on standard willowy runway models. Fortunately, the styling is really complementary here, and whilst it can’t be denied that the dress itself does swamp her a bit, I liked that she and her stylist stepped out of the box. 

Kaitlyn Dever’s red carpet look is obviously a lot more typical, but you can't go wrong with a Valentino dress, and this one in particular is so suited to the aura she gives off-it’s young and it’s fun and it’s fresh and the intricate floral print, otherwise muted if not for the spring influenced pops of pink and red, is timelessly pretty.

(L-R: Akwafina in Dior, Saoirse Ronan in Celine, Beanie Feldstein in Oscar de la Renta, and Renee Zellweger in Armani)

Lastly, there was Saoirse Ronan in Celine-one of my highlights of the night; she looked phenomenal, a glacial toned dream, and it was pretty different to what I generally expect to see her in. I might be way off base and in need of a bit of a review of her red carpet style, but I feel like she usually leans more towards pretty than edgy with regards to her styling at these kinds of events and a loose fitting, gun metal glittered slip dress is, imo, the perfect way to hit that previously uncharted midway point between the two.

(L-R: Kate Bosworth in Prabal Gurung, Kathryn Newton in Valentino and Sarah Hyland)

Now onto the afterparty looks, and I’m not gonna lie, they’re usually the highlight of the ceremonies for me; I feel like the initial ceremony is all about looking respectful and maintaining that whole dedicated actor image, whereas it seems the literal point of these showbiz parties is a competition to be the best dressed person in the room. Competition really makes people step their game up, and we always get to see more young talent whose style tends to be more current than that of the people we see on the red carpet. 

I’ve got to say, as annoying as I found her character in The Society, I have to overlook that gut instinct of irritation when I see Kathryn Newton and accept how stunning everything going on here is; honestly, she looks like an angel, and I feel like the team at Valentino must reeeeally like her to put her in that dress.

(L-R: Alexa Demie, Ashley Benson in Georges Hobeika, Maude Apatow and Barbie Ferreira)

Obviously I was super excited to see the Euphoria girls on the red carpet, especially Alexa Demie-she does 90s/early noughties inspired glamour better than anyone else on the young actor scene right now and her personal style and the sass she does so well as Maddy Perez shines through every time. Whilst Barbie Ferreira’s look is more casual and achievable for the rest of us in terms of wearability, it’s just as interesting a take on the same period; the delicate pink makeup, hair and jewellery with the 90s inspired slip dress in light teal is a red carpet take on soft grunge for the ages. As for Ashley Benson, she always looks gorgeous and that’s all I’m gonna say before I get emotional and start going into a rant about how her and Cara Delevigne’s relationship was one of the only good things about this shitshow of a year and how now that they’ve broken up the single flame of hope inside me has been extinguished and how their sex swing is gonna get so lonely with them caught in the middle of an ugly custody battle and-

You get the idea.

(L-R: Storm Reid, Sophia Bush in John Paul Ataker, and Sydney Sweeney)

(L-R: Billie Lourd, Paris Hilton, and Camila Morrone)

The Oscars

(L-R: Charlize Theron in Dior, Cynthia Erivo, and Florence Pugh in Louis Vuitton)

Ah, the Oscars. This is where the big money is really spent, and bad decisions are made-in fairness, this year’s winners were a lot more satisfying than usual and I think all of us felt that Parasite was a well-deserved win. I really thought it was gonna be Once Upon a Time in Hollywood just as a bit of a token gesture to Tarantino considering it’s his 9th film, though undoubtedly his worst of the ones I’ve seen, so I was relieved that this wasn’t the case. That being said, it still pains me to see the horror genre being ignored by the academy-in my mind, Florence is here for her performance in Midsommar just as much as Little Women. 

At the risk of getting repetitive, just assume my opinions on Charlize Theron in Dior here are the same again, that Cynthia Erivo is still bringing goddess energy (this is probably my favourite of her looks), and that against the opinion of the masses, Florence looks divine in this colour. I mean, when I say the masses I just mean the people I follow on Twitter, but still, I just wanted be an excuse to be dramatic so that I could insert a meme.

(L-R: Natalie Portman in Dior, Regina King in Versace, Scarlett Johansson in Oscar de la Renta, and Sandra Oh in Elie Saab)

Once again, Scarlett Johansson’s stylist is doing God’s work; this outfit is everythingggg-the Oscar de la Renta dress is probably my favourite thus far. Like we’re talking angel, but make it fitted and sexy, and I hope you read that in the Tyra Banks voice I intended because 2 memes in a row would rob me of any credibility I’m building as a fashion account and I’m not ready to trash that for bad memes just yet; give it a couple of mental breakdowns and I’ll be there. Natalie Portman’s look was a favourite of mine too, with the cape over the top adding a sophisticated touch to the celestial, slightly bohemian feel of the dress. I initially found the detail of the names embroidered into said cape to be quite moving-in a dream world, directing would be my career of choice and so I really admired the statement-but finding out that Portman herself is the only director hired by her own production company ruined that for me a little bit. Then again, multi-millionaire celebrities making performative gestures for good publicity and not doing all that much to make any real change? Colour me shocked.

(L-R: Beanie Feldstein in Miu Miu, Brie Larson in Celine and Billie Eilish in Chanel)

Now, of all the Miu Miu looks so far, I think Beanie Feldstein definitely got the best one. The intricacy of the embroidery, the silhouette, the old Hollywood stye curls-it’s all so graceful. I’d say this is probably her best look of awards season and she and her stylist did a really great job.

And as for Billie Eilish...Guys...do you think she might be wearing...Chanel...by any chance? I’m not sure.

Seriously though, as far as an oversized tweed suit with the brand’s logo emblazoned all over it goes, I like this look. The acid green roots and the jewellery are what make it for me, adding to the grunginess of the outfit which is interesting against Chanel’s prim and proper aesthetic of the last few years. I know she has good reason for the way she dresses, but I’ve never quite been able to appreciate it-this outfit proves to me that her style doesn't automatically equal ugly and occasionally, she can make it work.

(L-R: Leona Lewis, Colton Haynes, Dita von Teese)

Elton John’s Oscars afterparty being the less exciting of the two big ones in terms of fashion-the other being the Vanity Fair afterparty which I’ll cover in a moment-I thought I’d whizz through it (posturing aside though, I bet Sir Elton’s party was a lot more fun).

(L-R: Chiara Ferragni, Donatella Versace, Bella Thorne)

This is a big statement considering Alexa Demie attended, but I think Chiara’s outfit and overall styling might be my favourite of the partygoers; if they decided to do a live action Barbie film in 2020 minus the PG ratio-because lets be real, she’d be a noughties Paris Hilton type and get up to some SHENANIGANS-this is the look that would become iconic. 

(L-R: Ashley Greene in Off-White, Alexa Demie, Sydney Sweeney, Annalynne McCord)

It was a hard decision to make though: I’m just as into Sydney Sweeney’s interpretation of burlesque come 1950s red carpet Barbie, Ashley Greene’s surprisingly delicate Off-White number, and Alexa’s dress and (as always) impeccable styling. That being said, Chiara’s clearest contender here for the best dressed of the night is Annalynne McCord. I know I'm one to throw similes around but she looks like an ACTUAL Disney princess-the dress is magical and an absolutely flawless fit. She carries it with such grace. I'm truly in love.

(L-R: Tessa Thompson in Versace, Vanessa Hudgens in Vera Wang, SZA)

As for the Vanity Fair Oscars afterparty, there were SO many iconic moments this year. SZA was the definition of the fire emoji, Tessa Thompson’s throwback Versace was the mermaid’s take on BDSM fashion I never knew I need to see, and I’d die to turn up to my graduation ceremony (here’s hoping for a successful attempt at the old uni shebang this time, lol) looking as elegant and simultaneously extra as Vanessa Hudgens did in Vera Wang. I mean, this was before Vanessa went on her dumb Instagram live corona rant because she was upset she couldn’t go to Coachella and I still kinda lived for her, mostly because of moments like this. She’s always been the queen of channelling a more hedonistic, carefree era and this dress is the most refined example of that boho decadence yet. It sounds dramatic to say but the rich purple is such a bold choice considering it’s a a colour we rarely see on the red carpet but now I’ve seen eggplant coloured silk I need it, lol. 

(L-R: Suki Waterhouse in Fendi, Lili Reinhart in Marc Jacobs, Lucy Boynton and Margaret Qualley in Chanel)

Then there was Suki, Lilly, Lucy and Margaret as well who all went full angel mode in some of my favourite runway looks of last summer’s haute couture week; Suki’s Fendi dress and Lili’s Marc Jacobs number were highlights of both their shows and there’s something even more magical about them both when the uniformity of the runway is removed. I also would go on about how much I love Lucy Boynton’s style for the millionth time but I think you get my point.

(L-R: Nicole Richie, Cynthia Erivo, Hunter Schafer, Billie Porter)

The more I look at the photos I saved from the Vanity Fair “red” carpet, the more I come to the firm conclusion that these looks are my favourite as a collective. Along with the elegance and sex appeal of the outfits above, we’ve got all these looks too which are so VIBRANT and fun and experimental. Billie Porter is absolutely majestic and continues his reign as the king of in-your-face, theatrical red carpet style, and Hunter and Cynthia look so radiant. Whilst Nicole’s look isn’t as colourful, she still brought drama with the satin gloves and the smoke lined eyes, and she is definitely ready to step on someone’s neck here.

(L-R: Halima Aden, Ella Balinska in Schiaparelli, Emma Roberts, Ciara)

(L-R: Kiki Layne in Michael Kors, Kim Kardashian in Alexander McQueen, Kylie Jenner in Ralph and Russo, Lashana Lynch in Michael Kors)

(L-R: Rowan Blanchard in Iris van Herpen, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Stella Maxwell, and Sarah Paulson with Holland Taylor)

I’ve got to say, it’s really cool to see Rowan Blanchard in Iris van Herpen too; it’s interesting that as far as I know, she and Joey King were the only ones to wear her this awards season, both being up and coming actresses. It would be a good choice for the brand, probably best known for its futuristic, conceptual aesthetic, to also focus its PR efforts on the young potential inheriting that future. Orrrr it could just be that Rowan, Joey and I have the same (good, lol) taste-not gonna lie, from my experience of stalking her instagram Rowan Blanchard does make some unique fashion choices and her feed is full of bold outfit inspiration.

(L-R: Adriana Lima in Ralph and Russo, Alessandra Ambrosio in Armani, Billie Eilish in Gucci, and Donatella Versace in Versace)

Then there’s Billie Eilish, who is really on another level. This is her second custom made baggy suit of the night, this time Gucci. IMAGINE. Chanel and Gucci making custom pieces to suit your very specific style. Again, though, I really like this; whilst it’s very clearly a Billie outfit, it’s got a level of sophistication, cohesiveness and glamour to it that takes it to that I can admire. 

(L-R: Camila Mendes in Moschino, Barbara Palvin and Dylan Sprouse, and Chiara Ferragni)

Honestly, the Vanity Fair red carpet really belonged to young talent this year, and Camila Mendes in one of my favourite Moschino looks from the Picasso collection really seals it. She could’ve just gone for a basic pretty dress-this isn’t a natural choice-but she really does have the proud, regal look of a woman who knows some man is gonna paint her a portrait that will end up in a famous gallery one day. 

One last thing before I move on, though. How the fuck does Chiara Ferragni get everywhere?! And by that I don’t mean how does she get invited, I had the shock of finding out this woman I followed on Instagram because I liked her outfits and thought she was pretty is a hugely successful businesswoman in Italy long ago. Power to her. She’s a big deal! I get it! I just mean, physically HOW? How do you hit Elton John’s party AND the Vanity Fair party in one night and look this good? God really does have favourites, huh. Well, I guess in this hypothetical scenario where I believe in him anyway. 

The SAG Awards

(L-R: Dakota Fanning in Valentino, Kaitlyn Dever in Ralph Lauren, Scarlett Johansson in Armani, and Zoe Kravitz in Oscar de la Renta)

So, I kinda forgot the SAG awards existed and thought that my post was basically finished before I looked in my folder and saw the one dedicated to this ceremony. My initial reaction was like “oh, this is the shitty Oscars, right?” and I assumed the red carpet would be shit and that I could call it a night-it’s 3:30am, I wish I was calling it a night-but then I looked and saw that I had even more outfit photos saved in that folder than I did for my Oscar dedicated one. Because fuck, I want to to sleep, but the SAG awards had a surprisingly good turn out?! So maybe not as irrelevant a ceremony as I thought? Because Dakota Fanning turned up looking like some divine mythical being again, Scarlett Johansson pulled another incredible look out the bag, Zoe Kravitz was a modernised Audrey Hepburn, and Kaitlyn Dever read my comments about her dress being “timelessly pretty” and said “bitch, you really thought” before showing up looking hot as fuck. Truth be told, I think the SAG awards were first but in this universe where Kaitlyn Dever would pay any attention to my opinion of her outfit do we really care? 

(L-R: America Ferrera, Andrew Scott in Azzaro Couture, Camila Mendes in Ralph and Russo, Caleb McLaughlin )

(L-R: Lupita Nyongo in Louis Vuitton, Lily Allen, Nathalie Emmanuel in Miu Miu, Cynthia Erivo in Schiaparelli)

See, I was going to make a comment above how I took back what I said about Camila Mendes not just going for pretty dresses (which I guess I just did here instead-JUST TO BE CLEAR SHE STILL LOOKS STUNNING) and then I uploaded the next photo set and got distracted by 2 things:

1. How weird it is that British legend Lily Allen, who does not get NEAR enough credit for her smart her songs were might I add, is dating David Harbour AKA. Hopper off Stranger Things!?

2. How mad I still am about Game of Thrones and how dirty the writers did Nathalie Emmanuel (and Emilia Clarke and Lena Heady and Nikolaj Coster-Waldau and basically everyone else on that show but that’s another story).

In this same universe where Kaitlyn Dever cares about my opinion can we make the issues I have in the last bullet point not exist? Please?

(L-R: Sophie Turner in Louis Vuitton, Renee Zellweger in Maison Margiela, Phoebe Waller-Bridge in Armani, and Renee Bargh)

(L-R: Gwendoline Christie in Rick Owens, Madeline Brewer in Monique Lhuillier, Kathryn Newton in Valentino, and Lili Reinhart in Miu Miu)

Finishing off the SAG looks, we’ve got the four above. 

Once again, Kathryn Newton was Valentino’s blushing crown jewell; Allie Pressman hate aside, she really is the perfect dressing up doll for the brand. Fresh faced and poised, she has all the elegance and gentle femininity necessary to make floating down the runway as Valentino models do look natural, and Lili Reinhart did an equally good job being a Miu Miu girl. She makes that idiosyncratic cutesy-ness work, all the frills and fragility of a china tea set look easy where I’d just look like I’d been consumed by a charity shop doily. Madeline Brewer did a good job too, helping a Monique Lhuillier design pop in a way that it doesn’t usually. When your hair is bright red and your dress cerulean blue, coral tinted lipstick is a *ahem* choice, buuut in this case it paid off because the result is a look which demanded my attention-ML dresses are reliably pretty, however, they tend to be predictable. Madeline and her styling did a good job subverting that formula. To end the section, though, I feel it’s only fair to save my fave woman til last-probably one of the few people in the world that isn’t a Rick Owens model that can pull off his designs. Ofc, I’m talking about the queen that is Gwendoline Christie. If we’re talking embodying brands, she did justice like nobody else could to the spectacle of Owens’ formidable, out-of-this-world aesthetic. This is her version of the princess moment, and when you’re as striking as she is, nothing less would do. 

At least my girl Brienne of Tarth is thriving<3

The Grammys

(L-R: Ariana Grande in Giambattista Valli, Cardi B in Mugler, and Pia Mia in Julien Macdonald)

TBH, like I said with the Brits, I never planned to do any music award ceremony red carpets, just because I feel like the fashion tends to be more geared towards a younger audience buuuut I’m kinda glad I changed because Ariana looks INCREDIBLE. MESMERISING. TRANSCENDENT. JFC. There’s a reason the photo of her on her Wiki page has been changed to one from this night and it’s because she looks absolutely exquisite, like some kind of moon goddess with an R&B touch which I suppose is kind of her brand? Sometimes I go kind of lukewarm on Giambattista Valli and forget how mystical but at the same time frothy and indulgent and all around luxurious the pieces can be. This is a cupcake of a dress and I want to eat it. Cardi B has become a bit of an unexpected fashion icon and Pia Mia looks as hot-party-girl as ever but I feel to put anyone next to Ariana in this dress seems harsh because she just completely stole the show and I don’t even know if she won any Grammys.

(L-R: Josephine Relli, Gwen Stefani, Jameela Jamil in Georges Chakra, and Chrissy Teigen in Yanina Couture)

Other than Ariana, I’m not gonna lie, there was nothing wildly exciting, BUT I did think there were some beautiful colours out on the runway-plus for all her occasionally bad takes I really like what Jameela Jamil stands for and her style has always been very quirky cool. The electric blue tiled effect with the black mesh underneath kinda reminds me of a peacock, and contrasts wonderfully with the carpet-it’s very reminiscent of her T4 days. She’s one of those people that seems to get aggression directed at her that’s completely disproportionate to whatever it is she’s supposed to have done; sometimes the way she goes about saying things is wrong but the intention behind what she’s saying is usually good. Then again, the internet still despises Chrissy Teigen (in a way that’s kind of excessive considering what we seem to collectively let some people get away with) for a dumb AirPods tweet and I’ve included her too. THIS IS NOT A POLITICAL STATEMENT, this time anyway. I just think she looks good!

If I’m going to get controversial about anything, it’ll be Gwen Stefani. She looks stunning, the dress is stunning, and the boots are stunning. The outfit is not my problem! My problem is how she seems not to have aged at all. This woman is 50 years old! That she drank the blood of her Harajuku girls is the only explanation here. Can you imagine if she tried to pull that shit today? She’d get rightly accused of being a culturally appropriating weeb in about 10 seconds flat and we’d have to pretend to stop liking Cool and Hollaback Girl. 

(L-R: Finneas O’Connell in Gucci, Lucky Daye, and Shaun Ross)

(L-R: Tess Holliday, Dua Lipa in Alexander Wang, Tyler the Creator, and Grace Elizabeth in Giuseppe di Morabito)

Back to what I’m supposed to be talking about in this blog post: the fashion. And here, most importantly, Tyler the Creator looking like a cast member of the Grand Budapest Hotel. IDK why. But I love this man.

(L-R: Lil Nas X in Versace, Lizzo in Versace, and Shawn Mendes in Louis Vuitton)

(L-R: Billie Porter, FKA Twigs in Ed Marler, and Swae Lee in Giuseppe Zanotti)

See in general, the men were a lot more interesting on the Grammys red carpet. With the exception of Twigs, Dua and obviously Ariana, the men’s outfits are a lot more memorable; Billie Porter became the most fashionable meme on the internet, for god’s sake. And even when their outfits weren’t extravagant, they were just more interesting, imo, which is a rare occurrence. I didn’t expect Finneas O’Connell to be the writing half of Billie Eilish (the other half being Billie herself) I cared about and yet, in that Gucci blazer, here we are. 

(L-R: Jessie J, Hailee Steinfeld, and Madison Beer)

(L-R: H.E.R, Usher, FKA Twigs, and Matt Shultz)

Of the afterparty looks, my favourites are what we can see of these more casual outfits-I love what F.K.A Twigs and H.E.R are wearing, the headscarf with the leatherjacket on top is in particular very throwback rockabilly, and I’m even into whatever it is Usher’s got on.

(L-R: Olivia O’Brien, Amine, and Alrissa)

(L-R: Salem Mitchell, Machine Gun Kelly, and Sydney Sweeney)

Now, how to round this all up!? How to relate the confusingly persistent but very welcome presence of Sydney Sweeney on, like, ALL these red carpets back to the MET!?

IDEK. It’s been a long year. 

The Met Gala has usually come and gone before we know it, but with everything going on, it’s been the longest January-May I think most of us have ever known. I keep going on about COVID-19 in all my posts now but I have almost forgotten how to write an intro and outro because the pandemic is pretty much consistently on the brain and unless I have something right in front of me to use as a distraction, my mind tends to wander off into a very anxious place. I think, like many others, I feel frustrated and disappointed and angry with the way the situation is being handled by the people who are supposed to protect their citizens, and by how much of a fight some are putting up against measures that are in place to try and save lives. The point of this ramble, I guess, is that whilst we should never forget what’s going on and do the best we can to help prevent the spread of the virus, it’s okay to still care about mundane shit. Was this post one big long distraction for me? Probably. But if there’s something harmless you can do to keep your anxiety at bay, don’t feel bad for doing it. Contrary to popular belief, you can care about more than one thing at once. You can be sad that something you were looking forward to has been cancelled whilst still being sad for the people who are suffering because they’ve lost love ones or who have been forced into precarious living conditions. If talking about clothes on the internet is going to help you get through this pandemic, power to you.

If anyone has read til the end, thank you! I hope you are well! As always, feel free to reply to the post or inbox me with your thoughts! It doesn’t even have to be related to this post. If you’re struggling with everything going on, feel free to reach out too. I spend too much time on the internet anyway, lol! My plans are to finish my fashion week reviews and then I have a Lana Del Rey albums inspired lookbook which I pinched off the stans on Twitter (who I will of course credit when I write it!). For the time being, look after yourselves!

Lauren x

[auroraaboraaborealis]

There are few critics whose work can be read for style alone, and many of the best of those are essentially impressionists or appreciators, like Whitney Balliett and Henry James, idiosyncratic enthusiasts who wrote most often to explicate a new, if sometimes baffled, love. There is a still smaller number who, though passionately opinionated, and as often inclined to damn as praise, manage to turn opinion itself into a kind of art form, who bring to full maturity the moral qualities that hide in violent judgment—qualities of audacity, courage, conviction—and make them come so alive on the page that even if the particular object is seen in a fury, the object seems less interesting than the emotion it evoked, while some broader principle always seems defended by the indignation. Of that still rarer kind, those who come first to mind in English might be Tynan and Shaw on the theatre, Johnson and Jarrell on poetry—and to those names must be added that of Robert Hughes, the Australian (and, latterly, American) art critic, who died this week.

Hughes was many kinds of writers—his hugely popular account of Australia’s founding, “The Fatal Shore,” and his two marvellous books on the cities he loved, “Barcelona” and “Rome,” as well as his biography of Goya were all memorable in their kind—but his fame rightly rested on his thirty or so years of art criticism for Time, and (as he knew) above all on the series and book “The Shock of the New,” still much the best synoptic introduction to modern art ever written. “Nothing if Not Critical” was the title, taken from Iago, that, with mordant self-mockery, he used for a collection of his criticism. And he was a pure critic: both his memoirs and his essays on cities came most alive when he was laying into someone, or pouring praise on something, explaining why one fountain in Rome is more beautiful than another, or why someone he met in the course of life was not beautiful at all. The critics’ work was his work—not disclosing, but describing, fixing, defending, denouncing.

He was, first of all, an artist who just missed having a career as one—as a young man, a cartoonist, his line was said to be ridiculously, fluidly nimble. (There is a wonderful portrait of the young, inspired, angelic-looking Hughes in Clive James’s “Unreliable Memoirs”; indeed, a fine biography might be written of Hughes and James and of the conquest of Anglo-American opinion by Australian energy and unspoiled ambition.) He thought with his hands. When he was defending a notion of permanent value in his mid-nineties “culture war” polemic, “The Culture of Complaint,” it wasn’t with a sniffy reference to Plato or Dante, but through his direct experience as an amateur carpenter, of the practice of planing, sawing, varnishing, and getting it right. There were good tables and bad tables; master carpenters to make them well and miserable ones to make them badly. Craft attempted with passion—that was his critical touchstone. Though it was part of his achievement to help end for all time the notion that novelty in art is in itself a virtue, or that “radicalism” or progress was in any way a reasonable end for creativity, he did so without becoming a reactionary. He had only contempt for the cheap smug conservative taste that risked nothing and tried no new thing, and rooted its suspicions in bile and bad faith. He much preferred a rough-worn and unvarnished table made by passionate hands to a smooth one made to pattern.

His values rose not from some distant imagined past, but from the European modernism that still vibrated with excitement in the Australia of his youth, where no one yet knew it well enough to have grown tired of it. Shaped—some might say scarred—by a resolute Jesuit education, Hughes had as a teen-ager drunk in the images and ideas of that faraway modernism without the least touch of complacent familiarity. (Mechanical reproduction heightened, enhanced its value for him.) In the same way that his contemporary Barry Humphries relished the dandy-art of the eighteen-nineties in a way that few Brits could, or that Clive James kept faith in the power of the heroic couplet to communicate, Hughes believed in modern art with something close to innocence. Although “The Shock of the New” is in many ways an account of the tragedy of modernism—the tragedy of Utopias unachieved, historical triumphs made hollow, evasions of market values that ended by serving them—that tragedy is more than set off by the triumph of modern artists. The thesis of “The Shock of the New,” if such a work can be reduced to one, is that what art lost when it could no longer credibly be a mirror of nature it had gained as a transmitter of lived experience, so that, if the surface of the world had been ceded to the photographic image, the essentials of existence—desire in Picasso, physical ecstasy in Matisse, or the agonized alienation in Giacometti, or all of them at once in Van Gogh—could now be expressed with newfound urgency.

Hughes had an impressive line in indignation, but he was allergic to irony. If he seemed at times out of place in New York it wasn’t by virtue of unorthodox opinions; it was because of a kind of robust, unashamed absence of irony, or meta-awareness, in his work, an absence of sentences placed in inverted quotations or of any despair about the ability of plain speech to achieve plain ends. What he really detested was mannerism, in all its guises, whether the mannerism was the Italian kind that had to be cured by Caravaggio or of the postmodern kind that had yet to be cured at all. If this left him blind to the virtues that mannerism may contain—elliptical thought, the tangle of reference, stylishness—well, who would not want to be in a minority clamoring for truth and passion in a mannerist age?

A radical conservative, a skeptic about the avant-garde in authority who relished the trespasses and achievements of the avant-garde in opposition, he was like Swift, someone who had been driven into reaction only by the excesses of the reforming party in power. He could be rough and even brutal, and, like every critic, his hits and misses are, in retrospect, in about even balance. The odd thing was that, in conversation, he was immune to the habit of turning differences of taste into differences of value. If you explained to him why, say, Jeff Koons or Damian Hirst was not quite the monster he had imagined, he would listen patiently, and then sum up your wavering, hesitant hems and haws in a neat phrase: “Hmmmn…Well, Yes. You’re saying that Koons is to sex what Warhol was to soup cans?” A machine gun burst of laughter. “All right, then!” As with all first-rate writers, the bite, and even occasional bluster, was covering up something, and in Bob’s case this was an enormous vulnerability: to experience, to people, to art. The images that arrive from a quarter century of sporadically intense friendship are not of enemies excoriated but of gentle gestures attempted, of poetry recited and far-distant masterpieces evoked.

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“Ah, yes!” was his usual start to a sentence, eyebrows raised in memory followed by the single name of whomever or whatever was about to be quoted or praised or described: “Ah, yes! Auden!” he would say, and then he would give you, from memory, the entire nativity section from “For the Time Being.” (I knew no contemporary writer of any kind who had so much poetry committed to memory; it was part of the rote-learning side of his Jesuit education.)

He was as touching a man as you could hope to meet: when our first son was born, Bob arrived at our loft with arms full of stuffed Australian animals for the newborn. “Now this, you see—this is … the Joey!” he said, showing him the baby kangaroo in its pouch, as though he were describing a work by David Smith. (When, a decade later, he called in the middle of the night, with the news that his only son, Danton, from whom he had long been estranged, but loved all the same, had taken his own life, it was with a desperate, apologetic grief that I have not, and hope never again, to hear equalled.) And, above all, he was a writer: I write this far from both from the Internet and from my own library and yet Hughes’s sentences and phrases stick in my head without either having to be consulted. For all the violence of his disdains, they are mostly phrases of enthusiasm: his insistence that Eric Fischl’s suburban vision “smells of unwashed dog, Bar-B-Q lighter fluid and sperm,” his evocation of the nineteenth-century American landscape artist as “God’s stenographer,” his description of a Morris Louis stain picture as “the watercolor that ate the art world,” or, more profoundly, his explanation of the rococo play of line and painterly weather in a Jackson Pollock and of how it belied his reputation as a mere paint-thrower.

He loved most of all art that danced on an edge between manifest accomplishment and audacity, where a painter managed to bring his or her sheer talent to bear upon the world—and then made the inadequacy of talent alone to bear adequate witness to the world manifest, too. The painters of the London School, which he did so much to raise in the world’s estimation, earned his trust because they echoed his virtues: a love of craft married to an allergy to mere elegance; a feeling for the life-giving qualities of healthy vulgarity and a love of life and the world as it really is, displayed without apology. The smears and howls and broken lines and awkward bodies, the will to truth evidenced in the open, blunt statements of Bacon and Auerbach and Kitaj and Freud—these artists were not so much his best subjects as his truest equivalents.

Criticism serves a lower end than art does, and has little effect on it, but by conveying value it serves a civilizing end. If Bob’s last years were in many ways sad, and at times agonized by the pain that his horrific 1999 automobile accident had left him, the work never stopped, and his affection for those round him never dimmed. Through it all, his mind would rise and a phone call would arrive, and one would race downtown to spend time with him; he would read page after page of whatever he was working on, reciting, in his gruff, warning voice, some masterly combo of verdict, examination, evocation, summary—and then, being Bob, look up, anxious as a schoolboy, and say, “But do you think it’s any good? Do you, really?” It was so much better than good that no good words came to mind. At the end of the evening he would dismiss you, as one raised Catholic and still surprised in the presence of the world, with a simple, “Bless you!” His writing will live as a repository of experience fixed in place by a consciousness tormented but never overthrown, and his memory will survive not as some hanging judge of the museums but as one of the indispensable mavericks of modern humanism.

Illustration by David Hughes, from Robert S. Boynton’s 1997 profile of Robert Hughes.

[meatismurderbutalsodelicious]

BBC Afternoon TV Chicken Curry (Circa 1981)

Chicken curry with chutney and plain yogurt over rice

I’ve been making this recipe since I was 16. 

Growing up in Ireland in a single-parent household, I picked up the cooking bug pretty early on. Mostly I had enjoyed watching my grandmother cook, and on the weekends, my mother.

Our grandparents, our mother’s parents, helped raise my siblings and I when we lived in the Greater Los Angeles area in the mid-1970s, before 1977 when we up and moved to Dublin, Ireland where my mother’s family originated.

Even back then, TV was the afternoon babysitter, and despite having only a whopping four stations to watch—BBC 1, BBC 2, ITV and RTE—we managed to be well-entertained and informed.

My older brother, Alan, and I attended St. Paul’s College in Raheny, Dublin. An all-boys school run by Vincentian priests, it was all very Harry Potter with the uniforms and blazers and school crests, but decidedly less magical.

At the time, the Irish Republic required secondary (high) school students to attend a particular number of school hours per year, and to make the quota, we had a half-day on Wednesdays. If memory serves, we were let off class at the odd time of 1:10 p.m.

I’d go home, make lunch and watch the women’s afternoon programs on BBC1 or ITV. Now, back in the day, there was an afternoon chat show that a cute, portly blond middle-aged fellow with a beard used to co-host. And almost every Wednesday, the show would have a cooking segment and that’s where I learned this recipe. 

Now, this is a particularly British curry; in that, long before chicken tikka masala became the number one dish for British soccer hooligans, this was considered an authentic “curry”. But, as I matured and my experience and palate broadened, I realized this was less an authentic Indian curry and more some weird amalgam of ingredients from every South Asian and South East Asian country the Brits ever colonized.

But I learned to make it, and it’s become a staple of my family meal repertoire, alongside French Toast, and pancakes. If Mom roasted a chicken for Sunday dinner, then a chicken curry was on the dinner menu for Monday. 

Despite being raised in Ireland, our mother insisted we recognize and acknowledge our US roots. So, while we lived in Ireland we celebrated Thanksgiving every year and this recipe became part of family post-Thanksgiving ritual that went on for many years. (Imagine my surprise when I learned a few years back that the mother of the protagonist in “Bridget Jones Diary”—the books and films I’ve neither read nor seen—had her own post-Christmas Turkey curry buffet!)

Roast chicken. We’ve all been there; we’ve all got at least one chicken breast, a leg and a thigh just waiting there to be turned into chicken salad or a dry sandwich. This is where this recipe comes in to save the day.

Ingredients:

3 tablespoons of Ghee (Indian clarified butter) or 2 tablespoons of butter and 1 tablespoon vegetable oil.

1 large onion, diced

1 small birds eye red chili or a 1/2 teaspoon chili flakes (this is to your taste, so add as much or as little as you desire)

1 thumb-sized piece of fresh ginger root

2 tablespoons ground cumin

1 teaspoon ground turmeric

1 tablespoon curry powder

1/2 cup of raisins

4 cloves of garlic

1 cinnamon stick

4 to 5 green cardamon seeds

1 teaspoon black pepper corns

1/2 cup of roasted of unsalted peanuts or cashews, ground up in a food processor (or two large tablespoons of crunchy peanut butter).

Juice of one fresh lemon

1/2 a tart apple (Granny Smith)

1 can of coconut milk (full fat, or why bother?)

1 can low sodium chicken or veggie broth

A pound of cooked chicken, preferably breast and thighs

1/2 cup of frozen peas

1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro

OK, in a Dutch Oven or a nice broad and deep wok or pan, sauté the onions, raisins, garlic, peppercorns, chili, cardamon in the ghee or butter/oil mixture. I use one medium size birds eye red chili that I halve or quarter, piercing the skin to let the oils free. You want to cook the vegetables until they are glistening and beginning to caramelize. The raisins should begin to plump.

If they absorb too much of the oil, just add more, then mix in and sauté the crushed spices. Keep an eye on the pan, you want the spices to begin to brown, but you don’t want them to burn. When the onions are browned and the raisins begin to bloat, add the juice of one whole lemon, grate in the fresh ginger and then shred at least half of the apple's flesh into the mix. 

Before you add the liquid, you will want to remove the cinnamon stick. Add the coconut milk.

Now, add the same amount of chicken or vegetable broth, I use the coconut milk can to make sure it’s an equal measure. If it's too runny, then add a cup of creamy plain yogurt, if it’s too thick, a cup of water. Add in two tablespoons of peanut butter. The ketchup goes in last to bring out the sweetness and color. Lower the temperature to a nice simmer, stirring occasionally.

Now, break out the protein. We had a roast chicken earlier in the week and had a breast, a leg and thigh leftover. No need to be polite, just shred the meat with your hands.

Now, fold in the chicken until every last piece is submerged and coated. This chicken is cooked, so now you don’t want it to become rubbery. Set the heat on the stove to as low as it can go, so that the curry is slightly simmering.

Now, when I get to this stage, this is where I begin to work on rice, which should only take about 20 minutes to cook. Take the time to stir in your two tablespoons of ketchup, this is for acidity and sweetness. Finally, fold in the peas and the finely chopped cilantro in the last five minutes of cooking. This adds brightness and color to the dish.

If you’re going to go all “authentic”, use basmati rice, but Jasmine works just as well as long as you rinse it well before you boil it to get rid of the excess starch. This ensures firm, separate grains that are not sticky.

[youknowmymethods]

Content Creator Interview #8

Here we are again folks, number 8! This time we’re continuing on from last week’s interview with a bit of role reversal, @ellis-hendricks posing questions to her friend and beta @geekmama, chatting about Brit-picking, bad writing habits, favourite authors, and, most importantly, which of Sherlock’s shirts does it for her. 

But starting off with a recap of last week’s intro...

We are, respectively, a Californian and a Geordie, and we got to know each other through reading and reviewing each other’s fics (geekmama’s ‘Time of the Season’ series was one of the first fics I read and loved). Geekmama has been writing in the fandom for around 3 years, and I’ve been doing the same for around 2 years, spurred on by the end of series 4 (and the ILY scene in particular). We started beta-reading each other’s work around a year ago, and are always discovering new and unexpected words and phrases that don’t translate across the pond! Although we’ve used the same set of questions for these interviews, we haven’t seen each other’s answers – so it does mean that if nobody else is interested, at least we will be!

Series

 ellis-hendricks: Was there a particular moment in the series that set the ship sailing for you?

geekmama: I think it was A Scandal in Belgravia, and specifically Sherlock’s unprecedented apology to Molly, that got me thinking that the possibility was there, that it wasn’t just Molly’s schoolgirl crush vs. Sherlock’s needs when the game was on. I have to say, even though the Sherlock/Molly ship is easy to board, Mofftiss, etc., were very clever about leaving the way open for other pairings throughout the series. Even the ILY scene and its fallout could be interpreted very differently, if one was so inclined. It is really thanks to all the amazing fanfic authors out there that I jumped on board and took up residence on the good ship Sherlolly.

ellis-hendricks: What's your favourite episode and why?

geekmama: I love bits and pieces of all of them, but the one that I’ve watched more than any other is The Sign of Three. It’s heartwarming, hilarious, and only mildly heartbreaking. Even the villain of the piece, as little as we see him, has a motive one can understand.

ellis-hendricks: If you could ask/tell the series writers one thing, what would it be?

geekmama: Killing off Mary was a mistake, and I don’t care if that event sets up the entire story arc of season four, you should have thought of something else. Come on! You are brilliant writers, you could have done it.

ellis-hendricks: Do you have a controversial opinion about the series? E.g. a character who everyone else hates, but who you love?

geekmama: Or everyone loves but you hate? I’d say Moriarty qualifies. Andrew Scott is very cute, but though he’s in a number of the episodes we’re never given much insight to his character’s motives. Moriarty is pretty much just murderously insane in canon, and I don’t understand how one gets around that to write Molly/Moriarty or any of the slash pairings.

ellis-hendricks: Have you ever, when watching an episode, cracked a case before Sherlock?

geekmama: Well, if the writers want us to, then we’re given the information to crack the case before Sherlock.  The series is about him, after all. The cases are secondary.

ellis-hendricks: With whom would you rather be stuck at a wedding table –

Janine or Irene?

geekmama: Janine, she is just fun and rather ordinary, whereas Irene has numerous ulterior motives under her veneer of smug vanity.    

ellis-hendricks: Donovan or Anderson?

geekmama: Anderson, since he actually felt remorse for what they did to Sherlock, and came to admire him, too. There might be more to Donovan than what we’re given, and certainly that’s what fanfic is for -- I’ve made her a sympathetic character in a couple of my own fics. And apparently she and Sherlock have some pretty interesting history between them.

ellis-hendricks: Who would you rather bring back in series 5 - Mary or Moriarty?

geekmama: Mary, of course -- she is a far more well-rounded (and loveable) character. One wants to know more about her.

ellis-hendricks: Whose house would you prefer to live in - Sherlock's, John & Mary's, Molly's or Mrs Hudson's?

geekmama: Probably Molly’s, though Sherlock’s would be tempting. Molly’s looks pretty state-of-the-art in the ILY scene, if rather bland -- I couldn’t imagine Molly living in a place that’s all granite gray. It doesn’t reflect her personality at all, and I didn’t even think it could be her home the first time I saw that episode.

ellis-hendricks: In your opinion, who has been the best series villain - Jim Moriarty, Charles Magnussen, Culverton Smith, or Eurus Holmes?

geekmama: Eurus. We’re at least given some idea of her motives, and one can feel some sympathy for her, even though she is as insanely murderous as the other three. The other three are pretty equally revolting.

 Your writing

 ellis-hendricks: What was your first fic? What prompted it, and how do you feel about it now?

geekmama: My first in the Sherlock fandom was Visiting Hours, written in March 2016. I first watched seasons 1-3 of Sherlock in October 2015 and I’d been reading other authors’ work for several months. There were ideas I wanted to explore, and I wanted to see if I could still write at all, lol! I hadn’t written anything since July of 2013, when I celebrated a decade of being in the Pirates of the Caribbean fandom with a series of ten 50 word drabbles. Visiting Hours is only 100 words, official drabble length, and it’s held up pretty well, I think. I don’t hate it, at least.

ellis-hendricks: Which fic are you most proud of/most attached to, and why?

geekmama: This is a really difficult question since I’ve written quite a few Sherlock fics. If I had to narrow it down, maybe Idiots in Love, which is part of the Aftermath series and from Greg Lestrade’s pov, which is always fun, and The Kensington House, kid!fic from my Time of the Season series. But then there are all  the holiday fics… and the historical AU’s…

ellis-hendricks: You write great AUs set in other historical periods - do you prefer this or present day?

geekmama: I’ve read, and written, a lot of historical fiction, and certainly writing it comes much more easily to me than writing something set in the present day -- particularly current culture in the UK. It’s a good thing my dear Ellis_Hendricks is willing to Brit-pick for me. I did my best, but I’m sure my early Sherlock fic has plenty of errors in that regard. That was the most difficult thing for me when I was beginning to write in this fandom. However, I have grown to enjoy writing fic set in the present almost as much as writing historical fic.

ellis-hendricks: What are your worst writing habits?/What are your most overused phrases, plotlines, etc?

geekmama: Wow. There are probably a LOT of bad habits (run-on sentences, excessive use of parentheses and ellipses, etc. etc.etc.), and overused phrases/words. As for plotlines, I find the (comparatively) reality-based canon of Sherlock to be somewhat limiting to begin with (which is why AU’s were invented, I suppose). I try not to repeat plotlines, but of course I’ve used post-ILY scenarios multiple times (and no doubt will again -- the anniversary is coming up on the 15th), and I tend to overdo the h/c as that’s one of my favorite things.

ellis-hendricks: Do you have a writing routine? Where and when? And is everything digital, or are things ever handwritten first?

geekmama: Laptop, ideally in the morning, alone in bed (except for a pile of snoozing dogs), with no distractions like music etc. I can write with the TV or music on, but it takes a lot longer to produce anything. I haven’t produced finished handwritten works since I was in high school, and when I first got back into writing in late 2003 it was on a laptop I borrowed from work -- and it was a revelation! I wouldn’t bother handwriting more than a drabble or the outline of a story, now. Computers FTW!!!

ellis-hendricks: Who do you enjoy writing the most?

geekmama: Sherlock (if I have to choose -- I love Molly, Mycroft, and Lestrade pov, too).

ellis-hendricks: Who do you find easiest/hardest doing first person POV? - Sherlock seems fairly easy a lot of the time (hopefully readers agree -- I may be way off base, who knows?), and maybe Molly for hardest. We see so little of Molly over the course of the series it��s sometimes difficult for me to get a handle on her.

ellis-hendricks: Which fic would you recommend to someone who has never read your stuff before? - Benefit of the Doubt, maybe. I like the way it came out. It was one of those that practically wrote itself.

ellis-hendricks: What do you value most when it comes to feedback?

geekmama: Any feedback is very much appreciated, from Kudos to brief comments, but it’s always nice when someone references a particular phrase or idea they liked. I know how difficult that is to do, sometimes, though.

ellis-hendricks: Would you ever go back and revise old fics - or do you consign them to history once they're published?

geekmama: If I discover (or someone points out) an error I will go back and correct it, but I don’t really revise my stories once they are posted.

ellis-hendricks: What's the nicest/weirdest bit of feedback you've ever had? And does feedback ever influence what you write next, either within a story or in terms of future fics?

geekmama: I have to say I’ve had a lot of great, encouraging comments over the years, and maybe a few negative ones, mostly on FF.net, which I pretty much ignore, though one or two brought up interesting points. I think mostly people leave a comment if they really like something, or just go away if they don’t. Feedback does influence what I write to an extent -- say if someone really wants more of a certain story, or aspect of a story, that gets me thinking how it could be done.

ellis-hendricks: Do you - or would you - write other pairings?

geekmama: Well, yes, I’ve written Mycroft/Lady Smallwood, and John/Mary, and I have a few fics that reference Lestrade/OFC. And of course there are other F/M possibilities. But mostly it’s Sherlock/Molly.

ellis-hendricks: How would you define your style? (E.g. mine was called 'fluffy realism’, which I quite liked!)

geekmama: I agree with that ‘fluffy realism’ definition, the sweetest stuff and easily related to. I would call mine “Romance” if I had to choose a word, the old definition of romance that entails fluff, angst, humor, adventure -- all the stuff that makes a story interesting and fun to read.

ellis-hendricks: What's your method in approaching a story? Do you plan methodically, or wing it?

geekmama: I am somewhere in between. With longer fic I sometimes use an outline, but more often I have a basic plot in mind, complete with ending, and think about it until I’m finally ready (and have the time) to write it.

ellis-hendricks: Who do you write for? Is it you, or are you thinking about trying to please your audience?

geekmama: Mostly me. I started writing fanfic in the Pirates of the Caribbean fandom because I wasn’t seeing fic that went where I wanted to go with that story. With Sherlock it was some of that, and the fact that I wanted to further explore these compelling characters, and writing fic was the best way to do that. But I do write for my audience, to an extent, and it is fun to accept a prompt or theme from someone and write to it. In the PotC fandom we had a weekly drabble challenge for years, and I really miss that sort of thing.

ellis-hendricks: Do you have any WIPs, and do you think new chapters will ever see the light of day?

geekmama: I do have a WIP, Souvenirs, for which I’ve written a couple of additional chapters, and hope to finish some day. But it sort of got waylaid by the whole post-ILY thing. I may finish it. You never know. I also hope to write some more of that Regency AU, Uncertain Terms.

ellis-hendricks: Are you working on anything at the moment?

geekmama: I’m going to try to write something for the ILY Anniversay (January 15th).

ellis-hendricks: What’s harder for you - writing the start of a fic, or coming up with a decent title?

geekmama: Writing the start, I guess. Titles are usually easy. It’s plot and particularly a good ending that take a lot of work.

 Reading other people's fics

 ellis-hendricks: What are your favourite tropes in the fandom?

geekmama: Post-ILY scenarios, for sure, h/c, kid!fic, Mary is still alive, Christmas stories. Etc.

ellis-hendricks: What things are likely to turn you off a fic?

geekmama: Bad characterizations (we read fanfic because we want more of the characters we love);  poor editing / grammar; too many crazy tags; Intro posts that have TMI (I don’t want to know that you’re bad at titles/summaries/etc.), or that solicit reviews too blatantly. Well, those things and just stuff I don’t want to read -- bad porn, excessive violence (torture in particular), stories focusing on characters I dislike. I’m kind of picky, actually. But we write and read in a particular fandom for personal pleasure, and I think authors have to expect that their work won’t please everybody (or maybe anybody - who knows?).

ellis-hendricks: Can you recommend 3 favourite fics that aren't your own?

geekmama: Only 3??? Well, I’ve printed out miabicicletta’s A fearful hope was all the world, and sunken_standard’s Fumbling Toward Ecstasy, so I guess that counts for something. It’s virtually impossible to choose one of  Ellis_Hendricks’ fic, they reference so many of my favorite tropes and are all of them deliciously  memorable. But then, how can I leave out Quarto’s Competition? Or Emma_Lynch’s Quarantine? Or so many others?

ellis-hendricks: What compels you to leave comments on top of kudos?

geekmama: If some idea or turn of phrase stands out for me, and if the fic is well-done in general.

 ellis-hendricks: Quick-fire questions!

 John's TEH moustache or his TAB moustache?

geekmama: TAB (I don’t think we are meant to like his TEH moustache, are we?).

Sherlock's purple shirt or white shirt?

geekmama: Gah! Why do I have to choose? Purple, then.

Molly's stripy jumper or cherry cardigan?

geekmama: Stripy jumper, I think, as their relationship is more fully developed at that point.

Mary's christening outfit or black-ops gear?

geekmama: Christening outfit, for sure.

 Submitted by OhAine: this is a joint question for Ellis and geekmama: Do you feel that working together as betas has changed the way you both write?

geekmama: Not really, my process is the same and any input from Ellis_Hendricks is given after the fact. I edit the story accordingly, but there are usually only minor changes involved. I am particularly grateful for her “Brit-picking” skill, which obviously makes her far more valuable to me than I am to her -- it’s surprising how many little differences there are between the UK’s culture and California’s. I was woefully ignorant about that when I became involved in this fandom, and I don’t feel I’m much better now, really.

Next week, Friday 12th April 2019, @thisisartbylexie interviews @writingwife-83

[theprocrastinatingalien]

Casting The Batman

Director Matt Reeves said in a Q&A that he expects THE BATMAN to start production at the end of this year.  Now that's still quite a way off, but for that to happen a few things need to happen... like casting.

It's be confirmed that Ben Affleck has stepped away from the Batcave, and we're now looking at a new actor putting on the cowl.

Firstly, we need to asses... is Reeves' Batflick part of the DCEU, or does it stand aside, like the upcoming JOKER movie starring Joaquin Phoenix, despite the fact Jared Leto is expected to carry on as the Clown Prince of Crime within the shared universe.

Why is this important?  Well, Whilst Affleck is going off, that doesn't mean the supporting characters have to change cast, especially if it's in the shared universe.   Particular roles are in place.  Jeremy Irons as played Alfred in two movies now, and JK Simmons popped up in the JUSTICE LEAGUE as Commissioner James Gordon.   Either of those actors could continue.  Even if this movie is in the past.  Sure a younger actor in either part may make sense, but CAPTAIN MARVEL just proved you can do a whole film with nifty de-aging effects (Samuel L Jackson's Nick Fury).

Whilst I will, naturally, look towards who could be cast in supporting (and villainous) roles, right now we're going to focus on the big issue.  Who should play Batman?

Below are a list of different actors who I've seen suggested, or am suggesting myself, that could end up as the next Dark Knight. I've included a variety of ages too... just covering the bases.

KARL URBAN

This one was an obvious inclusion. Before Affleck was announced, Urban was my (and seemingly half the internet) top choice.  Probably best known currently as Dr McCoy in the new age STAR TREK movies, he also appeared as DREDD, and more recently played Skurge in THOR: RAGNAROK over in the MCU.  He's around the same age as Affleck (both born in 1972), so this would be more of a direct recast, but a popular one I believe.

ROBERT PATTINSON

Urg.  No.  This would annoy me... but a major rumour recently was that the TWILIGHT star was in talks for Bruce Wayne and his alter ego.  To be honest, it wouldn't be the WORST casting in the DCEU (Jesse Eisenberg as Lex Luthor, anyone?) and I would still give the guy a go.  It's just not a casting I'd be excited about. With Pattinson we'd have a Batman in his early 30s.

ARMIE HAMMER

The funny thing with this one... it was basically reported that Hammer had got the job.  The actor had to debunk the casting himself.  There's quite a fanbase for the actor to get this role, and to be fair, he had once been attached to a Batman role in the past, when he was cast as Bruce Wayne in a defunct JUSTICE LEAGUE movie.   Still, whilst the actor said nobody (in power) had talked to him, the media buzz may have brought him to the attention of Reeves... so I wouldn't rule out this casting entirely.   I'd certainly prefer it to Pattinson.  Both actors are the same actor as 32.

AIDAN TURNER

This Irish actor is very popular with the ladies (good for Bruce Wayne) and was a sheer highlight as vampire Mitchell in BEING HUMAN (the UK series)… He's currently the heartthrob lead in POLDARK, and was the heartthrob dwarf Kili in THE HOBBIT trilogy.   And whilst there probably has been a lot of onus on his looks, he just happens to be a really good actor, and in his mid 30s, I believe shouldn't be dismissed as a potential Batman (or Bond!).

TARON EGERTON

Now, this wouldn't be an ideal choice, but I'm throwing it in there.  Egerton's currently 29, so the youngest on my list at this point, and he's making quite a name for himself.  I think his best qualification for Batman is his role in the KINGSMAN franchise, but he also recently played ROBIN HOOD.  He's possibly a little on the short side for Batman, and whilst he has the physicality for the role, I don't think he's the best fit for Bruce Wayne.  However, I would definitely put him near the top of a NIGHTWING list.  As Dick Grayson does become Batman at some point, I thought it'd be fair to include him on here.

K J APA

Apa's the youngest person on this list at 21. If I'm honest, I'm not sure he quite has the charisma for Bruce Wayne, and he feels a little young for Bats, but that might be what Reeves is looking for.  Apa is Archie, the lead character in RIVERDALE, and he does get to play detective - which plays into comments Reeves has made.

KIT HARINGTON

Funnily enough, I was actually going to include Harington's onscreen brother Richard Madden, from GAME OF THRONES but I've switched it.  Harington certainly has the broody look down.  We all know how Batman likes to brood, and with GoT coming to an end, Kit's probably looking for a new high-profile acting gig.  THE BATMAN wouldn't be a bad way to go.  Not sure how people would take to this casting though, I'm not sure how the actor is perceived in the public eye. Agewise, he's inline with the likes of Pattinson and Hammer.

LIAM NEESON

I said, I'd be cover all the bases, and this one's going the other way, with an older actor. Liam Neeson is 66.   He's already been a part of the Batworld, featuring in THE DARK KNIGHT trilogy as villain R'as Al Ghul. But what if we turned that around and made him the big man himself.  Casting Zeus, Aslan and Qui-Gon Jinn as Batman works for me!

JEFFREY DEAN MORGAN

Okay, so this is not a clear-cut choice... but I'm throwing it out there anyway.  Morgan played Thomas Wayne in the opening scenes of BATMAN V SUPERMAN.   We know that there's an upcoming move (supposedly) based on FLASHPOINT, and in that, rather than Bruce becoming Batman, his father does instead.  What if the DCEU are clever and tie this alternative reality into the cast change... handing the cowl over to Morgan.  Personally I like it.  Recasting Batman without recasting Bruce Wayne.  Morgan is in his 50s, and currently plays the violent Negan in THE WALKING DEAD.

BRAD PITT

No, really.  Like Morgan, Pitt is in his 50's, but he's still got that good-looking, swagger (perfect for an aging Bruce), and he'd be a pretty commercial choice I think. Plus, Pitt is a pretty decent actor.  He'd be able to display a few different facets for the caped crusader, and might be able to channel that dark SEVEN vibe, tying in with Matt Reeves'  noir detective tale.

Now, I should probably start wrapping this list up.   I've already listed 10, but there's still two more I think deserve a mention.  One positive, one negative. 

JAKE GYLLENHAAL

Now, you're probably expecting Jake to be the positive, but no.  I do not like the idea of him playing Batman.  He's not right for the role.  So why am I including him now?   Gyllenhaal was a possible casting way back when Christian Bale was cast.  As were Joshua Jackson and Wes Bentley.   I'd actually rather Bentley get given the shot of any of them, but Jake gets the mention because apparently Matt Reeves may have his eye on him.   I'm not against JG as an actor, in fact I'm looking forward to his turn as Mysterio in SPIDER-MAN: FAR FROM HOME over at the MCU.  I just don't think he'd be *my* Batman if he were to be cast.

Which leaves us with...

OSCAR ISAAC

I saw Isaac's name pop up on another list, and you know what... I wouldn't mind it.  I wouldn't have thought of him myself,  He's half Guatemalan, half Cuban, which would add ethnicity to the character that had typically been played by straight up white American or Brits, with being as controversial as, say casting Idris Elba (who, incidentally has joined the DCEU as Deadshot, replacing Will Smith).  Isaac is suave enough to play Bruce, and intense enough to play Batman.  He's a good actor, and now has quite a following thanks to his part in the current STAR WARS trilogy.  Of the twelve candidates listed here, he's definitely up the top end for me.

It would have been quite easy to fall in with listing every dark-haired furrow-browed actor in Hollywood, but I tried to streamline the list a little.  Personally for me, my tick rests near Urban still, although I accept it's unlikely.   It's going to be interesting to see who they do go with in the end.  There was a lot of negativity against Affleck's casting, but I think most can agree he's been a highlight of the DCEU.

Whoever get's cast, will be filling the shoes of  Adam West, Michael Keaton, Val Kilmer, George Clooney, Christian Bale and Affleck.   Soon, I'll also be looking at the supporting cast - including an actor I almost included here as a potential Batman, but then realised I'd love to see him as a Riddler...

[theloniousbach]

Into the New Year for Jazz

I have submitted the following to a dear friend who runs the jazz show on Toledo Public Radio for inclusion on the website.  

INTO 2020 WITH JAZZ SPECTRUM

Even as I gladly accept these invitations to sum up the year or, even this time, the decade, I don’t quite do as I’m told and so don’t color between the lines I’ve been given.  Sorry.

Like you, our listeners, I rely on Jazz Spectrum to introduce me to current developments and to fill in gaps between 1982, say, and 2015 when, alas, jazz wasn’t my primary listening.  It is again in no small measure due to this show that I am back in this wonderful game.  I am developing enough current knowledge to be on the lookout for current players (let’s start with the members of Artemis who do fascinating work individually and collectively--more shortly) and trends, but I’m not auditioning dozens of recordings every week, putting together a four hour show, and doing all the work that makes the show such a resource.

So I don’t have a best of 2019 or best of the 2010s to offer.  But, I do have some thoughts..  So, bear with me, or don’t and go re/read our host’s more fine grained observations.

In thinking about the impact on hip hop on this music, I offhandedly texted my old friend that jazz has always been fusion music.  I didn’t happen to have a teenager bring home the latest incarnation of African American popular music, rhythm, and rebellion, so I’m learning about it indirectly when I see Terence Blanchard, Robert Glaspar, and Stefon Harris.  Brilliant players all of them with crack bands and a deep grounding in the wider tradition from which they can bring the new energy into the music.  Today I prefer pianos to guitars and acoustic instruments to electric ones, with little affinity for vocoders, looping, and effects.  The beats are infectious and jazz drummers are amazing for their huge ears and magical abilities to move the beat around, using the timbres of the drums to comment on everything the rest of the band is doing.  As an example I was just able to watch Nate Smith+Kinfolk via live streaming from our local club.  He was a dynamo with as much energy and power as the rest of the band--solid and smooth as they are--combined.

Hip hop has to be part of what propels this rhythmic invention.  If my kid perversely stuck with our traditional English and Celtic folk music, then, that I don’t get hip hop from him is my problem, not jazz’s. I embraced my generation’s fusions--rock, funk--and went back to Latin, Afro Cuban, rhythm and blues, show tunes, Third Stream, gospel, blues, and ragtime and saw them come into jazz.  So I’m prepared intellectually at least to welcome these latest developments.  These fusions have made and remade jazz, so yes it’s always been fusion music.

But let me borrow an idea from my quarter century looking at evolutionary biologist Edgar Anderson who worked at the Missouri Botanical Garden from 1922-1969.  His signature idea was that repeated backcrossing is as important a source of genetic variation as mutations and thus gives natural selection something to work on.  To apply it to jazz, it was jazz before and after Dizzy Gillespie started playing with Chano Pozo, but now we have Cuban and Latin and African rhythms in everyone’s musical DNA.  All sorts of tunes from all sorts of players now can just naturally take on a Latin feel.  It’s part of jazz that then continues to listen with its big big ears.

What has always excited me are these hybridizations and that is what will continue to invigorate the music into the 2020s.Kodri Gopalnath who died this October was not a jazz musician, but he brought the saxophone to Carnatic (Indian) classical music.  Rudresh Mahanthappa studied with him and brought that tradition into his playing.  It’s there now all the time whether in his reimagining of Charlie Parker on his 2015 album “Bird Calls” or with Rez Abassi in the Indo-Pak Coalition or his own “just jazz” gigs.  This quote from his Wikipedia article captures this idea of introgressive hybridization:  “In a 2011 interview with Westword newspaper about the resulting album, Samdhi, Mahanthappa said, "my idea was to take whatever I learned—take that knowledge—and really put in a setting that has nothing to do with Indian classical music.” https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rudresh_Mahanthappa

Since some of Miles Davis’s 1970s work incorporated sitars and tablas and remembering John Coltrane’s “India,” this music has been in the mix for decades.  It prompted a “Miles from India” two-CD set from 2008.  I try to keep an eye on Mahanthappa, Abassi (recording 1970s fusion tunes acoustically is damned clever), and especially Vijay Iyer to watch how jazz varies and is enriched.  I saw Iyer with his trio in 2016 catching extended hypnotic improvisations, one phased into “Epistrophy” before churning on.  He has recorded in lots of other settings, including duos with Wadada Leo Smith and Craig Taborn and with a sextet.  It is important music.

That’s one hybridization that backcrosses into jazz.  Another is with Middle Eastern, including Israeli, music.Abdul Al-Malik recorded on oud as well as bass in the late 1950s and early 1960s and Anour Brahem played oud with Dave Holland and Jack DeJohnette on “Blue Maqams” in 2017.  Those are first generation crosses.  It’s when someone like Omer Avital plays jazz informed by his Israeli upbringing that the introgression happens, when there are new scales, new rhythms to incorporate.  Avital’s own albums and with the OAM trio (including a set with the intriguing tenor Mark Turner) are favorites.  I also owe Jazz Spectrum an exposure to the Chicago trumpeter Amir ElSaffar and his Two Rivers Project which explores his Iraqi roots in a jazz context.

Anat Cohen is an exuberant player, exuding joy at what she and her bands do.  She has played with her brothers, Avishai and Yuval, with lots of Israeli in the mix, but she has Brazilian and Edith Piaf too.  She is in the multinational band Artemis: two Canadians--leader Renee Rosnes and trumpeter Ingrid Jensen, Chilean Melissa Aldana on tenor, bassist Noriko Ueda from Japan, and the lone American, and the amazing drummer Alison Miller.  Their debut album, probably with Cecile McLorin Salvant, will be a highlight of the coming year as their run here in St. Louis this October was.

I am particularly astounded by what drummers are doing these days.  Of course, there are sources--Max Roach, Jack DeJohnette’s insistent but subtle cymbals--and Art Blakely and Elvin Jones were not simply powerful engines driving the band.  But Miller is a fine example of, call it, “melodic drumming” where each drum/brush stroke is perfectly placed on the drum head, cymbal, even rim or side of the drum, to deliver not just a beat but a harmonic/melodic comment on the rest of the band.  There are so so many players and they make just about every show I see special.  Witnessing the magic in the making is why live performance is so much richer than recordings.

But to return to hybridizations, starting at least with Mid East ones, let me focus on London as a key world center for this music.  Precisely as the still Metropolitan center of a thankfully fading empire (Imagine there’s no countries/It isn’t hard to do/Nothing to kill or die for), it is a hybrid zone.  Yazz Ahmed is a Bahrani-Brit whose trumpet playing is enriched as she explores her Arab heritage.  She does exciting stuff and has followed up “La Saboteuse” with “Polyhymnia” this year.  Shabaka Hutchings has Barbadian heritage and brings that to his tenor and several key projects in the London scene.  I’m drawn to the intensity of Sons of Kemet where he solos over Theon Cross’s tuba and two drummers, but Hutchings also works with The Comet Is Coming and The Ancestors.  I’m a sucker for low brass, so I keep an eye on Cross too and he has his own FYAH released and is in the SEED Ensemble.

That London is a major jazz center is a development worth monitoring.  I think it speaks to the vibrancy of this music and the role of these hybridizations in keeping it so exciting.

I am eager for the 2020s.

[obtusemedia]

The best songs of the 2010s: #100-76

Happy 2020! Now that the previous decade has finally finished, it’s time to commemorate the 2010s. The decade in which I grew from an awkward teen to an awkward adult. And a decade with a ton of great music. Let’s dive right in: these are my 100 favorite songs of the 2010s.

#100: “Monopoly” by Danny Brown (2011)

Danny Brown is so delightfully grimy. He’s like a cartoon sewer rat come to life, rapping about pills and making hilariously crude jokes. In an anti-drug PSA, he’d be the sketchy weirdo trying to get a kid hooked on bath salts or whatever. And for a quick shot of his non-replicable style, it’s hard to do better than “Monopoly.”

Rapping over a glitchy, menacing beat with his trademark squawk, Brown lands oddball punchline after oddball punchline. In a span of less than 3 minutes, he threatens to defecate on your tape (and he has to clarify that too — “No, literally, shit all on your mixtape”), compares himself to Ferris Bueller sipping wine coolers and then closes his track by describing a woman’s vagina as “smellin’ like cool ranch Doritos.” And that last insult is the perfect distillation of Brown: the Adult Swim of rap. But much smarter than that would imply.

#99: “Shutdown” by Skepta (2015)

At the 2015 BRIT Awards, Kanye West performed “All Day” with a massive crowd of grime artists on stage, all in black, with flamethrowers shooting fire into the sky. 

Four days after the performance, Skepta — one of the artists on stage with Kanye — released “Shutdown.” It’s a much more fitting song for the intimidating, energized and proudly British crowd of MCs than a middling Kanye non-album cut.

“Shutdown” is the kind of song a rapper releases when they’re at the peak of their powers. Skepta was absolutely at that point in 2015, and so his finest single sounds like a coronation. His gruff delivery isn’t too loud, but it’s firm and confident. He knew he was the best MC in Britain, and “Shutdown” cemented that status.

#98: “Amor Fati” by Washed Out (2011)

Washed Out was one of the brightest voices in the turn-of-the-decade chillwave movement, and with cuts like “Amor Fati,” it’s not hard to see why. 

The big single off his debut, “Amor Fati” gives you a similar sensation as taking a shower: Pure bliss and warmth cascade around you. It’s a bit repetitive, but the song is clearly meant to set a mood more than anything else, so that’s excusable. If you need an entry point into chillwave, you can’t do much better than this.

#97: “Los Ageless” by St. Vincent (2017)

St. Vincent’s trajectory this decade took her from an art-pop weirdo who collaborates with David Byrne to a more mainstream art-pop weirdo who collaborates with Taylor Swift. But in that process, Annie Clark was able to pull her sharpest hooks out and put them in use in deceptively dark songs like “Los Ageless.”

With its sleek new wave production from Jack Antonoff, “Los Ageless” could’ve easily fit on most pop records. But Clark’s atonal, shrill guitar bursts and increasingly disturbing lyrics differentiate it. The song’s themes gradually shift from “lol Los Angeles is fake and plastic” to something more tragic. The desperate (in a good way) chorus says it all: “How could anybody have you and lose you/And not lose their minds too?”

#96: “I Like It” by Enrique Iglesias feat. Pitbull (2010)

I’m aware how ridiculous putting “I Like It” — a disposable, trashy club pop hit most people might not remember — on this list. Admitting I that I love this song probably guarantees that I’ll never get a job at Pitchfork.

But then those fuzzy, cheap synths come crashing in. And Enrique Iglesias sings his sleazy come-ons in an auto-tune slurry. And Pitbull delivers a gloriously ridiculous, very-2010 verse that references both the Tiger Woods cheating scandal AND the Obamas (along with gratuitous Spanish and a Miami shoutout). And then there’s the final touch: a prominent sample of Lionel Richie’s cheeseball classic “All Night Long.” It’s too much to resist.

What can I say? “I Like It” hits all the pleasure centers (including nostalgia, seeing as it came out in the middle of my high school tenure) in my brain. It’s a beautifully stupid, hedonistic highlight of the 2009-12 pop golden age.

#95: “The Wire” by HAIM (2013)

Retro-pop standard bearers HAIM had plenty of great singles this decade. But one of their first, the groovy breakup anthem “The Wire,” is still their best.

Unlike many most breakup anthems, which tend to be wildly emotional, “The Wire” is matter-of-fact. The relationship simply isn’t working, and it’s time to end it. That’s that. You’re going to be okay.

The verging-on-curt lyrics mixed with the Haim sisters’ groovy early ‘80s rhythm makes for a pop jam that’s perfect for any “It’s not you, it’s me” moment in your life.

#94: “Helena Beat” by Foster The People (2011)

I know they represent the mainstream selling-out moment of the magical late-’00s MGMT/Passion Pit/Phoenix moment, but I have a soft spot for Foster The People. Their debut album, Torches, might not have much indie cred, but it’s all-killer-no-filler and stuffed with monster hooks. And despite “Pumped Up Kicks” being the big hit, I’ve always preferred the album’s opening track, “Helena Beat.”

With its shuffling disco beat and Mark Foster’s piercing falsetto, “Helena Beat” is likely about as close as alt-rock ever got to the Bee Gees. The lyrics, which tackle addiction, are much darker than “Staying Alive,” but it’s got a similar sense of propulsion.

And let’s not forget — Foster wrote jingles before starting a band, so he can get melodies stuck in your head. And once you’ve heard “Helena Beat,” good luck getting it unstuck.

#93: “Redbone” by Childish Gambino (2016)

“Redbone” might be the smoothest R&B cut on this list. Which is why the song’s sense of dread and paranoia makes it stand out. 

Donald Glover’s scratchy, passionate falsetto isn’t conventionally pretty, but it works well while singing about some unknown boogieman who’s “creeping.” That’s why “Redbone” was a perfect fit for Get Out, because of its lurking dread underneath the comfortable exterior. This is the song that cemented Glover as being a true renaissance man, rather than an actor with a weird musical side project.

(of course, this still isn’t Glover’s greatest musical contribution — that would be the iconic “Troy and Abed in the Morning” jingle. Especially the night variant.)

#92: “Do You” by Spoon (2014)

Spoon has been America’s most consistently great rock band for the past two decade now. Even calling them “consistent” is practically a cliché.

So all you need to know about “Do You” is that it’s another solid Spoon song in a vast catalog of Spoon songs. Lead singer Britt Daniel is still effortlessly cool, the guitar-driven groove is simple and it all goes down easy. By 2014, Spoon had nothing left to prove, except how long they could keep up their streak.

#91: “I’m Not Part of Me” by Cloud Nothings (2014)

Cloud Nothings’ finest moment is four and a half minutes of pure angst and crunchy guitars. Squint hard enough, and “I’m Not Part of Me” is one of the closest approximations to ‘90s alt-rock. And while the Ohio band isn’t necessarily reinventing the wheel here, refining what made past music so great can be just as effective.

#90: “Hello” by Adele (2015)

Despite only releasing two albums this decade, Adele casts a major shadow over the 2010s. Although I find both those records to be a little on the bland side, there’s a reason she was/is a juggernaut. And the example of her prowess is “Hello.”

“Hello” has everything you’d want in an Adele song: It’s about not getting over a breakup, a very relatable topic, and Adele gets to show off her cannon of a voice. But it also has a secret weapon compared to other Adele ballads: ‘80s power-ballad production! The bombastic chorus has more in common with Heart’s “Alone” than any of Adele’s previous hits, and it’s a perfect accompaniment to one of the decade’s most melodramatic singles.

#89: “Slumlord” by Neon Indian (2015)

Despite putting out two essentially perfect albums this decade, Neon Indian’s mastermind, Alan Palomo, doesn’t really have that one mind-melting single. Yes, “Polish Girl” was a decent-sized indie hit, but it’s nowhere near his best.

But “Slumlord” comes damn close to perfection. It’s not quite as heavy on the melted-VCR aesthetic of other songs on Palomo’s best album, Vega INTL. Night School, but it makes up for that with an irrepressible ‘80s techno groove. “Slumlord” is one of those songs that could ride its beat forever — and it kind of does, with the “Slumlord’s Re-lease” coda following it on the album. It’s a nocturnal synthpop jam that even those allergic to keyboards couldn’t resist.

#88: “The Bay” by Metronomy (2011)

While most synth-weilding indie acts were trying to ape MGMT’s high-pitched fever dreams in the early ‘10s, Metronomy decided on a different, sleeker path with their 2011 album The English Riviera. That album’s best single, “The Bay,” is an immaculate blend of silky smooth yacht rock and nervy, tense new wave. Those two opposite styles shouldn’t work together, but Metronomy managed to pull it off regardless, creating the perfect beach anthem for awkward hipster Brits.

#87: “bad guy” by Billie Eilish (2019)

I expect the 17-year-old Eilish will likely be remembered more as an icon of the 2020s than the 2010s, as she has a long and promising career ahead of her. It’s like how Lady Gaga is much more of a figure of this decade, despite her earliest hits arriving in 2009. But “bad guy” — the kind of left-field, innovative pop single that signals a new era — came out in 2019. And it’s too damn weird, catchy and just plain fun to leave off this list.

#86: “Latch” by Disclosure feat. Sam Smith (2012)

It’s a bummer that Sam Smith turned out to be such a bore, because “Latch” — his introduction to the world — is pure electricity. 

Smith and fellow Brits Disclosure, who provide the pulsating, sensual production, were a dream team on “Latch.” All Disclosure needed to do was give Smith plenty of room to unleash his golden pipes, complete with a few futuristic touches. Smith delivered on his end, proving his worth as one of the best vocalists for conveying drama on the dancefloor.

#85: “Need You Now” by Cut Copy (2011)

No, it’s not a cover of the Lady Antebellum hit of the same name. 

There were plenty of ‘80s-inspired epic synthpop bangers this decade; some groups made their entire careers off of them. But what sets Cut Copy’s “Need You Now” above the rest is its sense of patience. It’s an incredibly slow burner, building the tension with a thumping beat and calm vocals until it all explodes with a dazzling climax nearly 5 minutes in. Af that moment, the Aussies fulfill their promise with a euphoric release of synths and thundering drums. 

It’s not a complicated concept for a song, but Cut Copy executed it perfectly.

#84: “The Mother We Share” by CHVRCHES (2013)

Glasgow new wave trio CHVRCHES never really lived up to their promising 2013 debut album, which opened with the anthemic “The Mother We Share.” But man, what a way to start a career.

"The Mother We Share” is all icy synths and furious drum machines, the sounds bouncing off each other like a hall of mirrors. And lead singer Lauren Mayberry’s quiet but confident vocals add the necessary human touch, conveying a tragic feel to the song’s triumphant chorus.

#83: “Night Shift” by Lucy Dacus (2018)

One of the most ferocious, biting breakup songs of the decade, “Night Shift” is a showcase for Lucy Dacus’ vivid storytelling. The Virginia singer-songwriter spends the first half the song setting the scene of a crappy ex trying to halfway make amends, while Dacus’ character holds herself back from lashing out. She saves the visceral emotion for the second half, when the grungy guitars kick in and Dacus lets out a wounded howl, proudly stating that “I’ll never see you again/If I can help it.” “Night Shift” is a tour de force of indie rock songwriting that rewards patience.

#82: “Round and Round” by Ariel Pink (2010)

Much of indie-rock trickster Ariel Pink is a little too jokey and off-putting for my taste. But on his defining single “Round and Round,” he sprinkled in just the right touch of weirdness into a song that otherwise could’ve been a massive easy-listening hit in 1980.

The quirks throughout “Round and Round” — the woozy, off-kilter production, the lyrics that seemingly make no sense, Pink answering his phone in the middle of the song — are enjoyable. But the song’s true strength is in its chorus: a sudden punch of roller-disco AM-lite harmonies that cut through all the song’s oddities. It’s a double-shot of warmth and nostalgic beauty that feels comfortingly familiar, yet still thrilling.

Pink seemed to know the chorus was the key to “Round and Round,” as he makes the listener wait nearly two minutes for it. But its inevitable release is a truly magical moment.

#81: “4th of July, Philadelphia (SANDY)” by Cymbals Eat Guitars (2016)

Heavily referencing an early Bruce Springsteen classic in the title of a song that sounds nothing like Springsteen is quite the flex. But New Jersey indie-rockers Cymbals Eat Guitars pulled it off regardless.

“4th of July” is a clanging, anthemic scuzz-rock track about going through an existential crisis in the middle of Independence Day. While everyone else is making plans for the holiday, lead singer and guitarist Joseph D’Agostino is howling away, “HOW MANY UNIVERSES AM I ALIVE AND DEAD IN?!?” It’s one of the hardest-rocking mental breakdowns put on record this decade.

#80: “I Like It” by Cardi B, Bad Bunny and J Balvin (2018)

Rapping over extremely-obvious samples has been a time-honored tradition in hip-hop, from the Beastie Boys trading verses over The Beatles to Puff Daddy jacking the chorus from one ‘80s hit and the beat from another in the same song.

But Cardi B, and reggaeton superstars Bad Bunny and J Balvin sampling the boogaloo classic “I Like It Like That” was an inspired choice. The trio’s verses are all delicious fun, whether they’re bragging about eating halal in a Lamborghini or referencing a classic Lady Gaga hit.

But that sample, combined with a trap beat and Cardi’s swaggering charisma powering the chorus, is what makes “I Like It” a classic.

#79: “Sign of the Times” by Harry Styles (2017)

Most former boy band members aim for a grown-and-sexy pop anthem once they go solo, whether its Jordan Knight, Justin Timberlake or Zayn Malik. But the standout member of the 2010s’ standout boy band, Harry Styles, chose took a sharp left turn into melodramatic classic rock instead. And it was a brilliant decision.

"Sign of the Times” is about as close to a classic Beatles or Queen power ballad we got this decade, with its clanging Western guitars, lush strings and thundering drum fills. Styles doesn’t have Freddie Mercury’s gravity-defying vocals, but his immense charisma powers the song anyways. It’s not 100% clear what “Sign of the Times” is about, but with its cinematic scope and cryptic lyrics, it’s likely about the apocalypse. And there’s not many superior songs to cry to while the bombs fall.

#78: “Dancing On My Own” by Robyn (2010)

The ultimate crying-on-the-dancefloor anthem, “Dancing On My Own” has already become a standard.

But Swedish alt-pop icon Robyn’s combination of icy synths and heartbroken, jealous lyrics can’t be replicated. Just ask Calum Scott, who slowed down the track into mushy, piano-ballad goop. Yikes.

What makes “Dancing On My Own” brilliant is its resiliency. It’s not a mopey song — Robyn is defiantly still grooving despite her crushed feelings. It’s a siren call for all those who have been hurt and know the only proper way to work out their emotions through cathartic dancing.

#77: “Trap Queen” by Fetty Wap (2015)

“Trap Queen” is an incredibly fun hip-hop banger, but I don’t think I can extoll its virtues quite as well as Fetty Wap’s hype man at the end of the track. So I’ll let him speak:

“YOU HEAR MY BOY SOUNDIN’ LIKE A ZILLION BUCKS ON THE TRACK?! I GOT WHATEVER ON MY BOY!!”

Amen. It’s a real shame Fetty wasn’t able to keep his momentum rolling past a big 2015, but at least we’ll always have the magic dying-walrus energy of “Trap Queen.” HEY WHAT’S UP HELLOOOOO

#75: “R U Mine?” by Arctic Monkeys (2012)

"R U Mine?” offers Arctic Monkeys fans the best of both worlds. On one hand, you have their AM-era slinky swagger. But it also retains the furious rock-n-roll energy of their early days.

Alex Turner sounds like a smooth-talkin’ cowboy here, but the music is anything but smooth. It hits like a semi-truck, with a calvary-charge guitar riff and so many thunderous drum fills you’d think you were listening to the E Street Band.

[itsfeminismhenny]

The Misgendering of Sam Smith

On September 13th 2019, singer Sam Smith made a post on Instagram announcing their preferred pronouns as being “they/them”. Immediately following this announcement, they were misgendered in multiple media articles discussing the declaration. One such media outlet was Associated Press who misgendered Smith in the article they published. AP later went back and corrected the article without notice or apology and avoided the use of pronouns until towards the very end of the article.This blatant disrespect of Smith’s preferred pronouns delegitimizes non-binary and gender transgressing people across the board and fails to educate readers. The arguments proposed by many in media that using gender neutral pronouns confuses readers amounts to little more than lazy journalism.

Also, in looking through the responses to Smith’s announcement of their pronouns, I found that the BRIT Awards were discussing the removal of gender-rigid categories (“Best Male Artist”, “Best Female Artist”, etc.) from their awards in order to accommodate non-binary artists like Sam Smith. My initial reaction was: good, as they should.

But a lot of people I saw respond to this were angered by it, often stating that if Smith “can’t decide if he’s male or female”, it isn’t the responsibility of the music industry to restructure everything around this indecision.

I have multiple problems with these arguments: First off, Sam Smith did not ask the music industry to restructure things for their benefit. They simply announced their preferred pronouns in an attempt to be “visible and open” about their experience as a non-binary individual. Second, what’s the big deal if certain award companies want to get rid of gender-rigid categories? The foundations of the awards would not change with this adjustment – they would be just as entertaining, elite, and prestigious. So what’s the problem? I guess the problem is that transphobic people on twitter feel uncomfortable with and are threatened by anyone who doesn’t fit within the gender norms of society, so they are unwilling to accommodate them in the most basic ways.

Link to Smith’s post: https://www.instagram.com/p/B2WpiusAc6h/?igshid=pf8eds9fdu5u

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A post shared by Sam Smith (@samsmith) on Sep 13, 2019 at 6:57am PDT