#i say a lot of times 'my heart feels so sad' but thats only bc at bouts at a time i get so depressed i feel it in my chest

[dapper-comedy]

ah yes mental illness

[blanketorghost]

SIDE A:

I fell in love with the ideal person But as you can see They had to go And it is the love that tore apart my entire heart and soul When holding hands, In the park we kissed and tears fell On fallen rose petals And, sadly, they told me so: "I have to leave, And it's not because of me, my heart lies with you All the love of my insides, my chest and my soul I know one day I will return."

SIDE B:

It was you who said goodbye And yet tears run down your cheeks If you are going to erase even the memory of yesterday like this, That's enough. Just smile for me. I sing and sing about love, one that's out above the clouds But I can't see it with my clouded mind No, no, we talk and talk about those regrets that grow day by day, and as the night swarms We forgive each other but there's no meaning to it.

SO HEY UH. LIL SNEAK PEEK OF THEIR BREAKUP ARC???

TW: for mention of underaged sex (??? only adding this just in case bc it all depends if you think their bio ages are counting their bdays during the school year the main story takes place so they'd be 17/18 respectively but I consider them to be before the school year so they'd be 18/19)

ANYWAYS HI

I decided to make their breakup so specifically heartbreaking i myself choke up a little when I imagine the scenes I'll have to write (I'll definitely cry)

So uh.

The inevitable happens and Yuu has to leave. The days leading up to his leaving date things are very tense between them. A lot of their conversations are thinly veiled arguments about Azul wanting Yuu to stay and Yuu telling him he has to leave even though he doesn't want to. Azul thinks that he's making excuses and wants him to admit that he values his life on earth more than their relationship─ Yuu just wants Azul to understand that he has way too many responsibilities and life issues he needs to tie up before he can even think about running away with him to another dimension where he has nothing to his name and could slow Azul's progress down (It also doesn't help that Yuu never actually tells Azul just how famous and influential he is on earth). Yuu also thinks that they could try making a long distance relationship work since Idia and Ortho are working on ways to allow Yuu to reliably travel since they've already managed to make phones work, but Azul is very against long distance because he thinks Yuu would fall out of love if Azul isn't physically there to be of use to Yuu. They always get out of these fights by apologizing and just expressing how sad they are they can't be together but they ultimately never decide on anything. It's actually so stress inducing for everyone because they were in their whole honeymoon phase before this.

There's a whole going away party the day before Yuu leaves and even though it's fun, everything is very bittersweet and I even have this cute scene where Grim asks to go to sleep on Yuu's bed like how they did before Ramshackle was fixed up pre ch.3 🥺

BUT ANYWAYS before the Grim scene, Azul texts Yuu to come to his room in Ramshackle (Yuu often gifts the dorm's spare rooms to friends including Azul ofc) so they can talk about what they're going to do. Yeah well the conversation gets derailed and they end up having sex for the first time as like a way of Yuu physically trying to show Azul that he will love him forever no matter what //sobs

Thats when Grim barges in after they're done and asks for Yuu to sleep over. With Azul's permission he goes and sleeps with Grim but he still feels guilty because they did something very intimate together and if able he would've wanted to spend the night with Azul instead. Yuu ofc can't say no to Grim because he also loves him a lot, though.

In the morning then Yuu wakes up and makes breakfast for Azul as like a way to apologize for not staying over+ maybe make up and talk more about what they'll do?? but when he goes over to Azul's room he finds out that Azul left even earlier in the morning and broke up with him through LETTER.

So uhm yeah Yuu is obviously very heartbroken about all this but he tries to keep a strong face for his friends since he is literally leaving today and doesn't want anyone to feel even worse than they are rn. All while Yuu is giving his goodbyes, he doesn't see Azul and thinks he just dipped and won't say goodbye in person. But Azul actually does go at the last second and they say goodbye, trying to leave their relationship in amicable terms despite everything and despite they're both crying like babies. But then Yuu kisses his forehead tells him he LOVES HIM so Azul decides to play the bad guy and say goodbye to him for good.

Obviously he eventually regrets that decision but in the meantime,

here we are

also fun fact!! Yuu's vc is Symag (alongside others- im trying to catch a vibe) and this SONG in Yuu's canon he actually writes it after their break up so legit this song is about Azul in Yuu's universe BYE

[puertoark]

My experience with each Amnesia game which I need to share with the world

SO UM. Hi. I fell in love with this game series its been a while and I needed somewhere to talk abt it so here I am !

I'll be depcting my unasked opinion briefly for each game bc god I have sm to talk abt every single one of them

Amnesia: The Dark Descent

Everyone loves this game right right I do too BUT I must say it was personally my least favorite of the series which doesn't mean I didnt fucking loved it. Almost everything abt it is nearly perfect - the ambience and sound design specially is something so so special and dear to my heart from this game oh my

I really enjoyed the narrative too its just that.. it didnt impact me like the others did and I think most of the complaints ppl have about Rebirth are applicable here aswell

I personally felt like the pacing was kinda odd too but thats probably just me anyway I rank TDD with 6 Alexanders and 2 Servant Brutes

Amnesia: A Machine for Pigs

Idk how safe it is to say that on the internet after 10 years but I enjoyed this game sm more than I did with TDD

I know why everyone dislikes this one (no inventory + no sanity + no mechanics + L + ratio) but I gotta say I enjoyed the safer walking simulator with occasional danger like gameplay

And I like how they did it too - This was the game to introduce the flickering light mechanic to when you're in danger and I absolutely love it?? Its more subtle and haunting than the roar + music start playing when you're in danger thing. its elegant and superb MY OPINION

Talking about haunting the HORROR aspect of this HORROR game is nailed aswell in more subtle things too! The atmosphere is so fucking bizarre and oppressive sometimes when youre just reading a fucking note and digging lore like christ. how. I really do enjoy Mandus's character as a creppy factor aswell as the manpigs designs too

Not talking abt Jessica Curry's score for this game bc everyone agrees its a masterpiece

I rank this one with both Edwin and Enoch

Amnesia: Rebirth

hey guys pls stop hating on games that are actual masterpieces plss

Ok now. I too have my negatives with this game. The jumpscares in the fear mechanics. And some scripted ones too but thats it.

Tasi as a character is amazing, I love her saur much I loved the mechaninc of dont "die" or else you'll be a ghoul in ten minutes and I love how talkative she is…. ik a lot of people don't like it but I think it works just perfectly with her character - esp since shes not "alone" like the other 3 and I LOVE her relationship with her pregnancy and Amari. By the end, her story had me in pieces like no ending was satisfactory enough and…. and…..

I LOVED the scenarios and atmosphere too Frictional nailed it with art direction and sound design as ALWAYS

Amnesia: The Bunker

My second fave of the series I rank with 9 Makkas and 1 lovely Amari

I am shaking, in tears, in pieces, trembling, floored, literally on your walls

God.

This game had no right in being this haunting and sad, literally… For me this game is the one that stands out the most in the franchise. I loved how most of the storytelling was on the scenarios and events of the bunker. A quiet, superb story. I loved every single detail abt it like I literally cant even describe it

The historical context, setting, ost, gameplay, CHARACTERS LIKE… HENRI AND AUGUSTIN I AM SO SORRY SOSOSO SORRY OMFG I could spend DAYS talking about them, talking about all the nuances of this game

Ofc they nailed the atmosphere and sound design but this time its better than its ever been. Feels so lonely and isolated being Henri on the bunker then you peek outside and theres a fucking WAR ready to take his life. The war that made his bff (prob his only family) a monster and took everything of them both. How scary it is to even use a gun sometimes… absolute masterpiece. Frictional peaked hard

I rank this one with one Henri one Augustin and one rabbit toy

thank you frictional games for ruining my life with horror games that for some reason had some of the best human and existential narratives ive ever experienced

Still have to play Justine tho.

[residentmara]

a little context for smth, the Astral Express Crew is this train of ppl, not really many ppl keep that in mind (ha, mind), that travels on the path of The Hunt, but the path they travel on isn't important, but they are following in the path of this Aeon (basically like, gods in the game but they're also not gods ?) who had died (I personally believe that the Aeon of The Trailblaze, the one they're following the path of didn't die, because there is nobody who knows how they died, it's unknown if it was at the hands of another Aeon even tho thats a popular theory in game, or if it was killed by a human or what) and they're just following in that guy's path and stopping at worlds when they can't pass, usually bc of a stellaron (cancer of all worlds) on the planets, and they help those planets and continue on their path

Mind (March and Dan Heng)

Mind would be March because of more like her backstory, she was found floating through space in a block of six-phased ice (I believe it was that or it was some 'eternal ice' but I am p sure it was six-phased) which Welt spent ages to get her out of, and I did get my facts a little wrong when I was being autism in dms earlier, her name is March 7th because that's the day the Astral Express Crew (which at the time I believe consisted of Himeko, Welt, and pom-pom (? for Pom-pom)) freed her from the ice, and she didn't even know who she was, so they took to calling her March 7th since that was the date, she canonically puts out this happy, bubbly, personality to cover up this like anxiety and sadness I believe is what Himeko says when you ask about March, but she puts on that personality and smile to cover up those feelings

and Dan Heng because he's smart.. and he also has things in his past that he's running from, he's generally a mysterious kinda guy (HELP IM REACHING DISCORD LIMIT ALR,, THE PRICE OF TYPING THIS ORIGINALL ON DISCORD WTF) theres not many lore rooted reasons that I'm saying Dan Heng for, though he does live in the file room (I think it was called.. words aren't wording but it is like 8:34 at night) and keeps things nice and filed n stuff for the express, he knows a lot about it, he also joined it because he was running from people from his past life / past (I say past life because even though he normally looks human, he's from this dragon looking species I can't spell the name of for the life of me who goes through this rebirth process) and he refuses to really talk to anyone about it, and if you in game ask Himeko about him she doesn't give you much information

Heart (Kafka)

I won't go deep into lore because I don't think we know much of Kafka's lore or she doesn't have too much to go into ig, but Kafka is one of these Stellaron hunters who's goal (you'll never guess it) is to get stellarons, Kafka can appear as this nice person but really she's kinda violent and slightly manipulative (though it is kind of for the 'greater good' in some sense depending on where your morals lie when it comes to lore of the entire game) also she uses a gun canonically when you use her ultimate.. enough proof there /silly

Soul as Himeko or the Trailblazer

tbh I'd mainly say Himeko, we don't really know too much about Himeko, only what you can get from asking Welt, but she found the express when she was a kid blah blah that's not imporant to why Soul would be her, she was there from the start, she knows like everything about everyone on the express, at least all there really is to know, she's the real owner of it, but she is generally who keeps things kinda calm on the express, she's who you trust (which when you put hms as pathos, logos, and ethos, we know who is what, Heart is Pathos, Mind is Logos, and Soul would be Ethos, and if you were to characterize Himeko as one of those, she'd be Ethos because you know you can trust her) + she has red hair

I'd say Soul as the Trailblazer (the Main Character) because that is also the only character you can be 100% sure of in the whole story, also I can kind of draw a connection from the Stellaron that is inside of the Trailblazer (they are generally supposed to just be a storage for it, we don't know why yet because that lore isn't rlly out yet) to the void seen on Soul in like the videos, they both have something that can like 'take over' them in some sense

and Whole as Welt

Welt is someone who also knows a lot about people on the express (not as much as Himeko though) but he generally is like this character that is like the 'dad' of the express, at least in my eyes (that I totally have shh I'm not a Heart fictive what) this is smth you can argue that Welt would be Soul for but he is in and out of the Astral Express this like peace keeper, there is a lot more of lore to Welt because he is a reoccuring in like another Honkai game (I think there is only one other ? but if not he's in the two others, but I cannot remember how mant there is) and I remember seeing something about a comic, but basically if you were to put a face on the express it'd probably be Welt or Himeko, Himeko because she is the actual owner but Welt because he is this powerful figure that has this cohesive story if any of my reasoning for Whole as Welt makes sense

Boom autism explosion pt 2, now I’m very sleeby so goodnight !! -💕

this is unironically the direct reason i got into honkai: star rail

[quodekash]

its 1pm and im finally well-rested enough to watch last nights episode of abaab, wish me luck (im rly excited for more threezo pls gimme more threezo) 

im eating a pomegranate while watching so my commentary may be slightly limited 

NOOO CHER WHY ARE YOU SAD ITS GONNA MAKE ME SAD 

i just accidentally sprayed pomegranate juice everywhere 

this is my first time eating a pomegranate and im sitting on my bed 

i have a towel on top of me just in case and im glad i have it 

otherwise my funky hufflepuff blanket would look like a crime scene rn 

anyway back to the show 

awh :[ 

comforting kiss 

im gonna cry 

“its not a company owner and an intern. its just you and me.” GHEIBRHGERH THATS SO PERFECT and also makes me feel better cos i was still feeling a little weird about the power imbalance/age gap so yay 

THEY HUG

NO, BC YOU WONT BREAK UP 

THIS IS THE HAPPIEST FLUFFIEST SHOW, I WILL NOT ALLOW IT 

JACK, YOU AND YOUR PERFECT HAIR, HELLO 

THREEZO 

LOOK AT ZO’S LITTLE HEART JUMPER

I WANT IT 

THE ARM THE HAND ON THE ARM LOOK AT THEM AAAAAAATYFYTUUVJ (ft jacks perfect hair on the left) 

OMG

THATS AMAZING 

IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU JACK 

GJERKDGBKRHEBGKJREBJGRE 

ah shoot 

wait hang on 

what the hell 

ive been wondering whats in that folder since day one

ohhhh okay its a groupchat 

props to that one person for saying its none of your business 

yOU HAVE ONE OF THOSE?? 

i nearly dropped my pomegranate 

why was i surprised to learn he has a mother 

a lot of people have mothers 

thats exactly what she said, isnt it? 

bc theyre actually in a drama 

its gonna cut to a scene of her saying exactly that 

damn i was wrong 

thERE’S A HUG QUOTA??? 

damn then i guess im going to jail 

my hands are covered in pomegranate juice this feels like a murder 

hey, does pomegranate juice wash off? 

MY BOY AND HIS EYEBROWS 

HAH, SUCKS TO BE YOU (checks notes) oregano? 

i do love that and that’s very sweet, but bro needs his coffee 

already at two kisses and were not even halfway through the episode. if only tinngun could live up to their standard. 

(this is mostly a joke, im just really salty because tinngun COULD have kissed SIXTY-SEVEN FREAKING TIMES and they DIDNT and no i will not shut up about this i spent way too long combing through the show counting every single time they didnt kiss to not mention it every single time any characters kiss. shameless self promo here)

no wait hang on what the hell 

WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN??? 

“drunk or not, i love you” i see now why that line was significant 

and also the slight breakup foreshadowing earlier 

i understand it now 

they wont break up tho bc (i pull out a sword) i will not allow it 

(just kidding) 

(i dont have a sword) 

(if i did have one tho i would absolutely take it out of its sheath right at that moment) 

FRIENDSHIP COMFORT TIME 

YAY FRIENDSHIP 

they make me happy 

HIS PERFECT HAIR 

I LOVE THEM ALL SO MUCH GFYTDFYTFCUTVJHV

oh yay we get some tub time!! i cant wait to learn more about him so that i can pick him apart and do a character autopsy on him to find out how he works! 

is he speaking from experience? tub, what do you have going on in life? what have you gone through? tell me all about it :] 📝📝

is it texas chicken or is it kfc? 

MY BOYS 

IM GONNA CRY THEYRE SO FREAKING CUTE 

ilysm three 

RIGHT????? he gets it 

THREEZOOOOOO

i love them so much

NOOOOOO

CHE??? 

something good better happen 

(eret son of eret voice) is tha’ who i fink i’ is? 

it might not be 

if anyone knows who plays this man, pls lemme know 

NOOOOOOO NOT THE GAMEBOY 

OH IT GOT WORSE 

sir do you have the technical skills for this 

i know hes the head of a game developing company thing but the actual physical insides of a gameboy are an entirely different thing, right? 

i was waiting for the thoop situation to come up again 

the MOOD that this is-

i have finished my pomegranate and can confirm that the juice does in fact come off of human skin, which is nice bc i looked like id murdered someone 

👀

and how are you gonna do that, gun? 

idk man, i reckon id appreciate you as my big bro 

yayyy that was really good, a little bitter at times but really sweet overall. 7/10, would try again 

oh and the episode was also really good 

huge lack of threezo tho 

theyd better make up for it next week 

still good tho 

bye bye everyone! have a good day!! 

[luxsea]

so i finally beat bg3 for the first time last night :))

also hap halloweenie :]

(not all but some) thoughts dump

im honestly so glad i got spoiled for karlachs ending back at the start of act 2 so i had time to go thru the stages of grief, make sad playlists, etc bc my tav/karlach really hit me like a truck. i knew i was going to romance her before i even got the game bc she literally is the reason i started playing to begin with but doing her route feels very right for a first playthrough bc imo despite how devastating and lacking her story can be it sure does shine when its good. her introspective moments you can only get if you romance her are everything to me. knowing she cant be saved in the end lead me to choose more accepting dialogue options which lead to infinitely more satisfying and at times inspiring scenes than if i pushed the "what if"

as for the very end, in a way karlachs dying scene and/or going to avernus scene is a lot more than what most characters get even if theyre youre romanced character... despite her ending being shafted to begin with?? which is ridiculous. (correct me if im wrong. most of them had nothing to say and what ive seen uploaded ie shadowhearts romanced ending is so meh) lae'zels orpheus ending did make me tear up, everyone else was just kinda standing there wearing ridiculous armor bc i forgot.......

despite everything im really happy with karlachs scenes? and idk if thats just bc they were the romanced versions and bc i didnt have my hopes up for her (if i hadnt been spoiled i wouldve been LIVID) but it rlly was one of the most touching moments for me. the "how'd i do?" "you were spectacular in every way" "for you. and for the city, and for myself, and blah blah. but most of all for you" caressing tavs face and her repeating back to herself that she was spectacular like shes at peace just by those words alone. "it's the one thing i can't beat, isn't it? same below as above. i love. you." and the blue flames of all her love for them searing hot white and killing her engine faster?!? ough "you more than anything. i saw- ...goodbye, sun. goodbye, sea. goodbye" I FEEL SICK I FEEL UNWELL. i should be crying but my heart just aches she's just everything to me okay!!

and the avernus scene is better than i thought it would be, the music is so sweet and badass, sharing cigars!!, lots of gay fuel for my fire, the feeling that its just the start of a new journey and not the end, charging together into the hells its so mwah mwah as long as you ignore the trauma and the fact that we couldve solved this any other way!! (do wish wyll wasnt treated like an awkward third wheel if the three of you go considering he's the one who advocates for her and going to avernus is part of his ending too. but ofc im also going she's my wife and the interaction is rlly touching)

as far as the rest of the game the emperors writing was so flimsy and uh they did a really good job making it feel like your choices didnt matter much in the end considering the praise its gotten and how the game was marketed. rip it needs some serious work but i didnt hate it. karlach brain worms take a lot of credit

my highest praises overall are that ive never felt this attached to a player character that i've made before and ive never seen a more memorable cast of npcs. there's too many stand out moments to count that it makes the insane amount of lag and bugs i had worth powering thru

BUT IM FINALLY FREE I CAN FINALLY REPLAY AND DO IT ALL AGAIN BUT BETTER

[yuukei-yikes]

That post str Harutaka angst hurts my heart a little but I do want it

HEH. CONFLICT IS SO FUN OKAY. haruka and takane get along too well i need a little something to have fun with.... also thank u for sending this im totally using it as an excuse to talk about it. i went crazy in this ask sorry

ok. i KNOW forward by winterhats exists...... and thank god it does 🙏in case u havent read it erm read it. thats like harutaka content 101... not to spoil stuff but something about haruka not telling takane abt his condition Does take place in that fic. but the thing with that fic is haruka has no memories.... (post str no memory haruka is a concept i was never a fan of bc it doesnt rly make sense to me?? Still love forward though🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏) SO IM THINKING OF a canon situation with haruka remembering fine yknow...

logically i think takane would be sad rather than angry once finding out. also she'd hear it from shintaro who is the only one who knew, aside from kenjirou but he's x_x post str💔 so shintaro it is. also it's such a shintaro thing to do isnt it?? accidentally mention it to takane or assume she knew and realise he messed up like, way too late. like he already said it like 5 times before he realised takane is asking him to repeat it so many times precisely because SHE DIDN'T KNOW

like i said i think its kinda a fragile thing because God its so sad. how could u even get mad at someone for choosing not to say they're dying. so yeah logically takane Would be mostly sad about both the sad reality haruka was living AND how she wasn't told, because to her it means haruka didnt trust her or maybe felt he couldnt count on her.

im abt to overanalyse: personally from a writing point of view i think the reason haruka doesnt tell takane is because headphone actor was already written and the narrative where takane doesnt know was already there. haruka's 1 year to live thing was written a lot after, with over the dimension. but besides that: from a character standpoint, of course haruka wouldn't tell takane. she is the last person he wants to worry and the one he wants the most happy memories with. and something important about haruka and takane's relationship is the fact neither knows much about each others conditions. in both their povs upon introducing each other to the audience, they both explain their illnesses briefly. they both say "i havent asked much". to me its always been about haruka and takane deeply relating to each other about people feeling sorry for them. so they dont owe each other the explanations theyre so used to giving to others! so to me, haruka doesnt tell takane because 1.he doesnt want her to worry more than she already does 2.he wants to have happy memories of her 3. related to that, doesnt want her to look at him differently. she is the one person who gets it. if he were to come clean abt it, he'd lose it. besides, haruka tells shintaro by the time he's like. LOSING HIS MIND and really deeply depressed abt the situation. kenjirou also knows... but haruka's father could've told him since its mentioned they used to be colleagues. personally i think haruka told him himself, since he also mentions kenjirou is the only adult he's ok sharing stuff with, so in a way its implied if ur delusional like me.

erm. anyways. i got a little sidetrack IM GONNA GET TO IT OKAY its just, haruka's dying words for takane man. don't cry anymore, you're gonna meet so many new people, etc. he basically tells her he is just 1 person in the long long life he assumes she will have. theyre best friends, he knew takane would mourn him terribly and thats why he thinks all that stuff he cant actually tell her.. augh haruka's goodbye to takane always gets me so so badly. bc he KNEW... like, ene lives in so much regret for not telling haruka how she felt but haruka died knowing she loved him. even if he didnt know it was romantic, he still knew she loved him :( i was going somewhere with this. (pacing around my room) oh yeah. his dying words. haruka doesn't convey all this to takane while he has the chance because of the stuff i said before but the most important was number 3. he doesnt want takane to look at him differently. plus everything he says while he is dying... god id post the whole screenshot. but he says "dont get mad at anyone but me" "please dont cry anymore" "im so sorry youve given me so much and i couldnt give back" he... doesn't Want to see takane upset. he knows she will be upset anyway but its like. at least he wont be around to see it, in a way. we could see this as kind of selfish but like The guy's dying come ON. i think he has the right to do that. lol.

WELLLL COMING BACK TO THE ORIGINAL APPROACH LMAO.. takane finding out post str....... i went on that tangent to defend haruka precisely cuz i dont think takane would be genuinely mad. its a tricky situation and its not like she can be like WELL BUT U KNEW AND U DIDNT WARN ME!?!?!?!? Like THAT IS a pretty lame position to take. HOWEVER. CONFLICT (PUTS HANDS DOWN) i think takane just needs to be mad

WHILE TAKANE WOULD BE MORE UPSET THAN MAD she IS also super impulsive. like insanely impulsive <- finds out she loves haruka and immediately runs for it even if it terrified her. so in the spur of the moment she blows up on haruka about it LOL like as SOON as she finds out. like i imagine she probably hears it from shintaro and like immediately leaves mid conversation to go find haruka and yell at him. that kind of thing.

and haruka's all like 😨😨😨 and he's stuttering cuz HE HAS AN ANSWER ABT WHY HE DIDNT TELL HER IT JUST SOUNDS RLY BAD LIKE "ERM I DIDNT WANT TO SEE U UPSET❤️" like in over the dimension haruka does get pretty nervous when takane starts pressing even if its as a joke. so especially with something so sensitive he has no idea what to do. i think he'd try to be all composed though bc its Post Str and idk str haruka is so. ethereal he is so calm isn't he. i think he would get nervous initially and then get himself together but ends up coming off as dismissive. so hes like i didnt tell you.....because i didnt want to❤️ and takane probably just needed to be mad for a little bit and was gonna get over it and be sad but hearing that just makes her so damn upset for realsies and haruka notices how she changed from😡 to 😐 and hes immediately like oh takane.... no... i didnt mean it like that...i just mean...OH DONT MAKE THAT FACE I DIDNT MEAN IT... and takane's like NOO DONT TOUCH ME WHATEVER IM LEAVINGGG unnecessary conflict in a romcom vibes

conflict probably lasts like. a day or something. a week tops. its harder for haruka than for takane. takane finds it a little refreshing i think its also cool to link it to all the other headcanons abt haruka being super desperate to be in company because erm Daze confinement gang🙏💥 while takane's a little like. i havent had a minute to myself in 11 days. so this distance actually helps her a little while haruka is like Hour 5 without my girlfriend I've cried so much i cant see anymore

they both feel like shit and do spend the time trying to see the situation from each other's perspectives though so takane realises she's being self centered and stupid and admits she just wanted to be angry and took it out on the first thing she could grasp at. but it was unfair. takane will apologize first and probably tells him she doesn't need or want him to "protect" her feelings and wants him to count on her from now onward. haruka's like *nod nod nod nod nod nod* and thanks her for apologizing. hed try to also apologize but takane doesnt accept it bc he wasnt wrong it was her who was unfair. hehe. i think he'd be crying so hard too bc to him its all these feelings coming back abt how he felt when he died and all the things he thought of telling her then. maybe he would tell her abt it, like i was thinking about all the people you'd meet and how u should be happy and not cry for me. and how in disbelief he still is that theyre together. sorry im. auauggagaggsgsggqgggg

all this just for me 2 enjoy the mental image of the little time in between where theyre awkward around each other and takane wants a little distance for a bit. i think itd be funny to see haruka being totally pathetic abt takane not paying attention to him. anyways. yeah. something like that i guess

[summercourtship]

Um… hi Kyra! Be prepared bcs this will be a long one…

So, I finished KCU about four months ago, and let me just say that I think it’s a masterpiece, everything about it is perfect, one part in particular that I loved was how relatable the reader was (Believe it when I say it, it is HARD to do that, especially when you don’t know WHO is reading) I could definitely see myself doing exactly what she was doing! I loved how possessive Kylo Ren was and how he as also extremely conflicted about the reader herself, you managed to portray his turmoil really well! A part that BROKE me was when Leia was talking about how he got his soulmate phrase… Damn… you’re telling me this kid, that already thought of himself as a monster, was super happy that he HAD a soulmate, because that was a confirmation that he could be good and be loved unconditionally by someone, only to have his hopes CRUSHED when HIS MOTHER read to him what it said???!!!! DAAAANNGGG GIRL!!! You woke up and chose violence!!!!

But anyway, let’s get to the point that I wanted to get… ahem… if you’re comfortable… AND ONLY IF YOU’RE COMFORTABLE… (if not, ignore this part all together) I wanted to know if you have plans to continue it, i have been searching in your profile (stalking) for a reason why you stopped(not that i am obligated to have one!!) and the only thing i could find was that you stoped writing for KCU was bcs you felt that people wanted to end in a certain way and you didn’t (I could be wrong btw it has been a long time since I saw it) and that’s so sad! BUT I am really happy with the chapters we have! I love re-reading them! In the end you should put yourself first, if it’s not making you happy then you should not stress about it!

Also… if you don’t have any plans for it… I think it would be really cool if showed some BTS! I saw the other ask saying the same thing about STBOTDI (amazing fic btw) and i thought “hey it would be pretty neat if she did it for KCU too!” so if you’re feeling generous, feed this starving woman?

Anyway! thanks for listening to my rant! Thats all Folks

oh, kingdom come undone, my beloved. thank you so much for your kind words- it's been a while since I've looked back on KCU. I'm pretty sure I cackled when planning the part with Kylo's soulmark and the revelation about how it appeared because it's so sad lmao.

I do have plans to continue it, eventually. I want to go back and edit earlier chapters (and truly EDIT them, like overhaul level of editing) because I want to put it back on track to the vision I had for it originally. A big part of why I kinda fell out of love with writing it is because I felt like there was going to be a lot of people upset that I didn't make "Ben Solo" happen because fuck that shit, I like Kylo Ren bc he's a piece of shit who is sad sometimes not because he's an uwu soft baby who made a lil mistake.

But also, I started writing it in a really hard time- I had been dealing with extreme isolation due to both COVID and some things that happened with my friend group that ended up separating me from them (I had my family and I'm very grateful but there were months before I returned home from my college apartment because I wanted to be independent and believed it wasn't that bad and ended up just... not coping well with that, I'm afraid). I started planning KCU when I was in Pennsylvania for my grandmother's funeral and was writing it while dealing with extreme anxiety and depression combined with the struggles of being on different medications. So, while I do hold KCU in my heart and I love it, I do view it as a time capsule and know that I was writing it to distract myself from and cope with the shit I was dealing with. All of that makes it hard for me to go back to it because it feels very vulnerable, even if it doesn't come through in the text. I don't know if that makes sense.

BUT yes, I would love to one day go back, give it some TLC, and finally finish it for you all. I don't know if I have any BTS I could share right now because I really want to sit down with it and fix it, but once I'm comfortable with the state it is in, I will share.

Thank you so much. <3

[this-is-an-open-letter]

Hi! What do you think about TTPD? Have you listened to all 31 songs or just the first 16?

Oh I have definitely listened to all 31 songs multiple times over.

I like it a lot. I will admit that its been incredibly overwhelming musically, because its SO much at once and the writing is so dense and its also been overwhelming watching people try and make out who each song is about and that's just not something I do with Taylor's music - partly because I am older fan who got into her music so much later into her career. I just want to listen to the music for what it is.

The easter egg hunting and connecting dots - is very very overwhelming that I feel like it muddled so much of the experience of just listening to the music. Of course I understand that this is part of the experience of her music and its something she's even encouraged, so i don't have an issue with it I just needed to limit what I was looking at so I could just listen to the music.

I gave the album a full listen on the Friday throughout work and just picked which songs I liked, again musically first and then lyrically later.

After doing my full listen I then wanted to venture into the 'theories' so I went to two people who I think do Taylor's music justice in their breakdowns which is emily and bonny at Chats and Reacts. Getting their view and fathoms on the songs was interesting, it gave some perspective and now I am just listening to listen.

I will say this album being so much, allegedly, about Matty Healy is truly a surprise to me- like really? him? But its Taylor and she feels all the feels all the time.

On my first listen So Long, London hit me the hardest, its so beautiful but truly such a sad song.

My Favourites off the album(s)

Down Bad- loved it on first listen, musically its so good.

So Long, London - as a track 5 girlie - its absolutely stunning and heartbreaking and angry and so so so good.

But Daddy I Love Him - this is my current fave - musically I love, lyrically its a head scratcher bc again Him?? But I do love that she's calling out everyone for questioning her choices and thinking their opinions matter.

Fresh out the Slammer - also long, great beat and it just hits right

Florida!!! - LOVE Florence on this, love that she's actually heavily featured - its a great track and would love to hear this one live

Guilty as Sin? - shes a sneaky sexy song that has a great beat to go with it.

Who's Afraid of Little Old Me? - LOVE, i love when Taylor yell sings - I don't think it will translate as epic live bc the backing vocals really give it the umph that drives it. But its a top fave

Loml - this one...woof - it being Loss of my life really just fucks you up. The duality of her starting it with her acknowledging that HE referred to her as the love of his life and then at the end of the song she actually tells you, it stands for Loss of my life is just ugh...so good and so sad.

I Can Do It With a Broken Heart - I mean....its a fun song bc of the chorus but its not up there as my most fave but I do enjoy it.

Clara Bow - I just love the imagery of this song and the story it tells - the media/fans love to build up women just so they can tear them down - from one to the other, each one replaced by the new, best girl only to have what was done to them, done to her too. I love that she calls out the cycle.

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus - confused by the names but I love the song musically.

How Did it End?- If we treat these next songs as a whole new album then this song would be the next Track 5 and really it fits it because its her asking How did the relationship end because she doesn't even know. Everyone's asking her and she has no idea.

So High School? Only because its a cute song about her and Trav that has a weird almost emotionally heavy but silly beat.

Cassandra - again who are these people? But I love this song- its got an anger to it thats interesting.

Peter - the imagery behind this one alone woof...makes me sad but also show cases the brilliance of Taylor's writing and imagination to relate Joe to Peter Pan and herself to Wendy. The boy she wanted to much to grow up, who just never did. Also the constant repetition of the chorus - 'You said you were gonna grow up, then you were gonna come find me' and well.....he never did.

Robin- another name, another mystery. The theory of it being about Aarons son is really kind of beautiful, its a sad but hopeful song about holding onto your child like wonder and how quickly it gets ripped from you as you get older as the world takes your innocence's.

The Manuscript - this one is really really beautiful and sad to me. In the same vein that Dear Reader was - she's on the outside looking back on to her life, just like everyone else is. She really weaves a beautiful story here.

The reality is this isn't a commercial album, but it will sell like one because its Taylor.

I do think its up there with one of her best, it is heavily saturated and maybe overly wordy sometimes, but thats Taylor's writing and we love it because of that.

[doggirlhen]

i just finished spiritfarer, actually properly finished. its impossible for me to talk about this game purely subjective bc its so. close to me. and my lived experience. putting this big long thing under a keep reading, warnings for discussion of death and whatnot as thats the prominent theme of the game, and spoilers for the game probably

please excuse the messy, rambly writing, im very tired and very very emotional about this sad boat game and just need to get my thoughts about it down before i go crazy

impossible to not cry at the end. i bought this game around 2019 on my switch, fresh after two or three big familial deaths. picked it up here and there but could never get myself to the end, either being to busy or it being too much for me. i finally found some time now, after owning it on PC for a year or two, to sit down and let myself experience it.

this game treats the passing of loved ones with such respect and care and the grief that follows so beautifully. even the characters i didnt much care for i felt heavily about when it was their turn through the everdoor. it blends this grief with gameplay mechanics so well, and doesnt ever let you forget those close to you. almost every character either has a resource you can collect because of them, their spirit still there when you need more of it, or theyre the ones who had you build the crafting station to make materials and youre reminded of them when you step in the door. i found myself making sure i had everyones favorite foods stocked in my inventory well past their exit. and to really hammer it in, everyone gets their profile marked in the stars when theyre gone.

stella's job is to take care of people, but shes always felt like a vessel-type character to me, as ive had my dealings with the loss of loved ones and those around me and found it incredibly easy to wear her shoes.

moments that really stood out to me were atul not letting you take him through, you just find his flower on its own. so heavily touched me, a man whos only ever cared for you not letting you see his struggles because he knew thats all youd devote yourself too. stanley, letting the weird kid take it the only way a kid could, curious but scared but you were holding his hand. i cant even begin to talk about daria, shes new to me and i can only hope no one can relate to her story but feel for her just the same. gwen, god i could go on about gwen. all the characters feel so lively, so real, all dealing with whats ending them as best they can.

the one that got me the most, though, was astrid. my grandmother on my moms side passed in 2019, so already getting me with a grandmother character but astrids story and motivations remind me so much of her and one of her lines at the everdoor, "dont forget me or i'll haunt you" sounds exactly like somehting my grandmother would say. tears pouring out of my eyes only beat by the end of the game as a whole. such a beautiful story

and beautiful game, too. breaking from the sad stuff for a bit to say the art and music are so beautfully crafted and touching, every character design and choice of animal so perfectly selected. look at darias profile how can you not fall in love immediately. look at her :3

just. please play this game if you have any sort of feelings about grief and loss. its touched my heart several times in the years since 2016 after lots of familial death and covid. its a bunch of different games at once, largely a resource management and crafting game but the story is so well written and the visuals are beautiful and im soon to buy the soundtrack because i always need it with me

this game means so much to me and will forever be on my mind, one million thank yous and tears to thunder lotus games and everyone involved.

[tabithatwo]

this is spurred on by seeing some of your tweets just now but i want you to know that I appreciate you so so much for how much you care abt jackie <33 i have said it many times and i will keep saying it bc your takes are always so good and thoughtful. i have a special place in my heart for fic writers and just people constantly talking in fandom spaces who delve deep into a characters psyche, even if such a large part of the fandom tries to mischaracterize them or simplify them.

a big help in me figuring things out abt myself when i was younger was from reading fanfiction and seeing characters like me and people caring abt them!! so whenever someone is just. straight up cruel or ignorant abt a character im like. but thats a person! like the exact character isnt real, but somewhere out there is a person like that, and it just feels like people arent using their empathy. but yeah! i hope that made sense. i always love seeing your posts abt jackie and they restore my faith in fandom spaces a little each time <3

Anon!! You are so sweet for sending this thank you so very much! My favorite part of this show is that we get so many complex characters to dive into and that none of the women are one dimensional or able to be put into an archetypal box. I will always strive to deep dive on them with such love and joy and reverence. I think it’s so special to have a show where I care so much about all of these characters and where there is so much to be explored with all of them!

YES THAT MAKES SENSE! THAT IS A PERSON! Every character has people who will see themselves or part of themselves in them and I think it’s so important to not see characters diminished by stereotypes based in misogynistic bullshit because you’re so right it can totally fuck with peoples heads! So many of the yjs have facets of their personalities that I happen to relate to deeply (another brilliant part of this show—so many of us feel seen by these characters when we might not usually) and I am always so happy to get to expand on the things I see in them, so that when people see hate, be it sexist or internalized misogyny or mental health biases or biases against those with addiction and so on, they might also see someone saying now hold on a goddamn minute—this person (and people like them) has value, this person cannot be reduced to this stereotype, this person deserves love and empathy, this person should not be reduced to something simpler that is painfully warped because it fits your narrative.

I have deeply discussed a lot of the yjs, both on tumblr and on twitter and absolutely in fic, but Jackie is the one that people get so fucking furious about. She’s the only one I get hate messages for defending or even just diving deeper on and I think that’s so fucking sad and telling.

So! Thank you so much for messaging <3 I’m so happy to know that you appreciate seeing it <3

[oboes-bos-hoes]

The byler brainrot is real and taking over, so let me share some lyrics from my fave songs that give me byler vibes

links for the songs will be at the end of the post

"Holding hands while the walls come tumbling down, when they do, I'll be right behind you" - Everybody wants to rule the world by Tears for Fears

(this is gonna be a long post)

"I'd die at the thought of the loss of your heart" - Love is reason by a-ha

"I'd never mean to hurt you, baby, I'm not that kind of man; I might not say I'm sorry, yeah, I might talk tough sometimes, and I might forget the little things, or keep you hanging on the line" - I'd die for you by Bon Jovi

"Something happens and I'm head over heels, I never find out until I'm head over heels" - Head over heels / broken by Tears for Fears

"I've done all I can do, all the letters I've sent through; put my life in the palms of your hands, maybe now you can see, that it's got to be me, but if you leave me, I'll understand" - You are the one by a-ha (THIS LINE IS LIKE. SO MIKE WHEELER CODED??)

"Turn in my sleep, a bad dream is over, think of you and shall I ever recover?" - I want to wake up by Pet shop boys

(fun fact, the lead singer of pet shop boys, Neil Tennant, is gay :D)

(this means theres gonna be a lot of songs from them in here bc gay boi in the 80s??) (also they r my fav band/pop duo(?) so. )

'It's mad, to be in love with someone else, when you're in love with he, she's in love with me, but you know as well as I do I can never think of anyone but you" - I want to wake up by Pet shop boys (this is kinda jumbled but if u kind of like. pretend that it makes sense for byler then it makes sense so go away)

"To fall in love, is it so uncool?" - I want to wake up by Pet shop boys ("i'm not.. gonna fall in love")

"Every time I see you something happens to me, like a chain reaction, between you and me, my heart starts missing a beat" - Heart by Pet shop boys

"If I didn't love you, I would look around for someone else, but every time I see you, you have the same effect, my heart starts missing a beat, my heart starts missing a beat, every time" - Heart by Pet shop boys

"Every time I see you, no matter what we do, there's a strange reaction, can you feel it too?" - Heart by Pet shop boys

"I don't care whether it's wrong or right, I want a lover tonight" - I want a lover by Pet shop boys

"Put your arms around me, it doesn't mean you love me, just that you want me and you need my company" - I want a lover by Pet shop boys (ok Micheal we get it, its just a hug)

"I'll never let you see, the way my broken heart is hurting me, I've got my pride and I know how to hide all my sorrow and pain, i'll do my crying in the rain" - Crying in the rain by a-ha (i'll do my crying in the van rain)

"And you think love is to pray, but I'm sorry I don't pray that way" - Tainted love by Soft Cell

"But now you're leaving... How many hearts must you break? How many calls must I make? But now you're leaving... In this world, all that I choose has come unbearable, but love is in your touch, ooh, it's killing me so much, only when you leave I need to love you" - Only when you leave - Spandau ballet

"Yeah she's my man" - She's my man by Sigue Sigue Sputnik (mike wheelerr) (i'll let u figure this out, i dont wanna try make a whole point here)

"You always wanted me to be something I wasn't" - What have i done to deserve by Pet shop boys (everytime i hear this lyric i get so sad)

welp that is it for noowww but feel free to reblog with ur fav byler coded lyrics :)

SONG LINKS:

ONLY 10 AUDIOS PER POST?????? WHY?? THATS SO DUMB WTF TUMBLR

last one is She's My Man by Sigue Sigue Sputnik

[thetenamongstthesethrees]

TW: REFERENCE TO SH AND RELAPSE OF SH AND SUICIDE ATTEMPT

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Ok so ik ive been inactive for a *WHILE* and im srry for that but like i have a buncha things that happened these past 3 months that I NEED To share SOOOO....

First things first, the one im most excited abt: I DID MY FIRST PERFORMANCE!!! My school was doing little mermaid jr and I got Scuttle! I was really happy to get my first role and getting at least one solo, and Im just happy overall on how it went! I think I did really good on my first try! Only bad thing was that now im kinda going through my lil mermaid hyperfixation and have been looking up fics where Sebastian and Ariel kinda have a Father/Parental Figure-Daughter or Older Brother-Younger (stupid but ultimately well meaning) Sister dynamic and have started to write a fic on that bc no ones done it before apparently😒(im going cray cray, bonkers mayhaps)

Might've gotten my eye infected(I live in the east of the us, new york to be more specific and woke up the day after the "live vintage (BLAME CANADA/j) filter" with my right eyes nerves slightly more irritated and haven't gotten that checked out so thats fun)

FINALLY finished that one drawing ive been making for 3 MONTHS.(well, technically....)

Almost done writing my passion project, AKA the one I originally wanted to make into an animated series but have settled for a book just in case that can't happen! I still need to work out some kinks, design more outfits, get all their personalities in check, make sure the world and magic is fully fleshed out, ect.

I also do band, and while I originally thought that I would have a problem bc of both band and theatres close scheduling(i originally had dress rehearsal on june 2nd, AND my band concert on June 2nd) but it all worked out in the end! My band concert went great, and while the dress rehearsal was a mess, we at least got through it! :)

Unintentionally quit SH! I was originally only meant to stop until AFTER performances, but ive been bettering myself and learned that if I ever want to forgive myself or at least move on I gotta stop feeling sorry for myself and not forget nor forgive, but remember, i just can't let it haunt me. I know I'll relapse, I always do eventually, but I want to enjoy these few moments of mental "clarity" while I can. I've also learned that for some reason i tend to become a more terrible person and despicable person the more time I spend at home with my mother, so that's fun. God, I hate America's education system, its messed me up BAD. AND the foster care system. I just tried to kms 2 times today, and she didn't even notice, or care. How sad is that?

On a lighter note, yes, as the rest of yt and TikTok, I got a minor lil hyperfixation on the Lorax and really think ppl should make more [PLATONIC] Lorax and Onceler dynamics, mainly the type where they're like some really annoying pair of bickering siblings or a father whos sick of his adopted child's shit, like there is so much on the table for platonic fluff and angst and most of what I've seen is romantic smut and fluff like CHANGE IT UP A LIL

Also, Ive been going to karaoke centers on Tuesdays and have become a lot more confident to performing in front of ppl! So far, I've performed "All You Wanna Do", "The Ballad of Jane Doe", "Heart of Stone", and am gonna do "What the World Needs" the next upcoming Tuesday, where I'm gonna try interacting with the audience while singing!!

(Also, before I end this....I may have ADHD??? my teacher who has ADHD says some of my behavior is "similar to hers"(i feel like thats just her way of saying i reek of neurodivergency) and I also did some research and I display similar/exact behaviors listed, have taken online tests from doctorate confirmed sites and basically all of them said to go get a diagnosis. I also found I do a few behaviors similar to stimming! Also also, I kinda suspect a lil more bc my mom has Autism and apparently sometimes neurodivergency is biological (i forgor the word) but my mom is kinda in denial abt my Depression diagnosis and thinks I got anxiety "biologically", so if I tell her I wanna get tested for ADHD shes just kinda gonna gaslight me into not believing that and i already told the school therapist and basically she just told me that I'm probably just imagining things or copying behaviors from my mother and that "kids like to give themselves all these titles nowadays" so I just did what I always do which is to keep it shut and act until they think you fell in line)

So yeah, thats all! Thanks for reading, now that my schedule is clear again ima start posting more frequently again, so be aware :) <3333

[dearreader]

latam swiftie here

I'm not on tik tok so idk what's going on there. The math side of the easter eggs has got a bit out of hand and they don'tknow what they're talking about. And I agree with you on "not needing an announcement to make it special". I feel this is kind of similar to when ppl complain about the surprise songs they got. I would have never chosen Labyrinth!! And I got it and loved every second of it!! It's special because it was my surprise song, not the other way around.

I didn't believe we'd get an announcement tonight until her dancers started posting black hearts. But my favourite thing would be for her to just play foolish one.

I'm super grateful for the shows, I got to see the mashup, it was insane and I loved every second of it. I had been waiting for over a decade for this so it meant everything to me. I am not expecting her to do anything other than show up at the announced time and perform (as long as weather and health allows her to).

I waited 3 years between 1989 and rep, im not expecting releases this often. No one was expecting 1989 tv right after speak now (I certainly wasn't expecting it until early next year the soonest). But she did announce it and it did happen. Thats just why it's not that crazy to think of an announcement this soon. It just hurts to see everyone calling us ungrateful. Over 17 years we only got 3 tour dates. And we're so so grateful for it, we tried to show her that with the "we will stay" fan project. I screamed so loud every single lyric I damaged my vocal chords and it took me a week to recover. People are still making edits, friendship bracelets, they're gathering in the parks and doing swiftie meetups, today I gave two fbs away on the subway!!

The reasons why I believe she won't come back are market-related and financial, but the whole T4F fiasco didn't help at all. The local producer (T4F) is responsible, not the stadium (Im saying this bc i saw this confusion a lot, here those are two different companies, I believe in the US it's the same one).

I understand and agree with what you said, I just want you to know we're very grateful for what we got. (and I didn't think you were rude). In all honestly, the feeling I got from everyone in that crowd was excitement and wanting to be a part of something this big. We didn't want to show anything other than support and love. I heard exactly 0 people complain we didn't get an announcement (but I'm not on tik tok so i might be wrong lol)

And no, we're not really a part of this whole thing the same way everyone (the US, Europe and even parts of Asia/Oceania) is. But I'm not gonna complain because at least we got tour dates. There are lots of places who got no tours dates at all (African swifties you're in my heart). I obviously understand she can't please the entire world and that there are financial decisions to be made!! She's a human and a business woman and I understand. But it does mean we get left aside (again! This is a world/capitalism problem where poorer countries get less chances in general and I'm not expecting Taylor to solve this).

Im sorry, this is so long. Im just trying to say that this is a reality (a sad one), that we understand it exceeds her 100%, and are grateful she toured this year. But that in the bigger picture, we're not a part of things like "the rest of you" and I believe thats where this whole rep tv thing is coming from. It doesn't mean we're not super grateful she took a chance on us and visited this year 😊

Thank you for reading and answering. I know you didn't have to. I really hope you enjoy the last show of 2023 :)

hi, please forgive me for a not good response as i’m tired and focusing on my breathing right now.

but thank you again for responding and explaining more about the financial aspect. and i’m so sorry if i ever implied latam swifties were ungrateful, i never meant to or ever thought that as everything i’ve seen has been nothing but overwhelming love and support from latam, and i really really hope she you’re there again because it’s clear the fans love her and i want her to just be able to be with fans and people who love the music. and the fact you guys are still doing friendship bracelet exchanges is insane and i love it!

and i do think she plans on releasing all of the taylor’s versions on the tour and she wanted to hit certain dates, which is why she announced speak now and 1989 so close together. i think we’ll get reputation sometimes early next year (late january or february ((but i think february is more accurate))) and debut a bit closer to the end of the tour.

and i’m not going and sit here and say you’re apart of this tour just as much as any other location is, because again i’m an american so no matter what i’m not going to understand what it’s like in latam. but i really hope it doesn’t feel like you’re apart if this differently than anyone else, this tour is a monumental moment in taylor’s life and career and the fact she’s able to go to so many locations (especially for the first time) is so massive and big in of itself. an album announcement is a special thing but it doesn’t make the tour or anything about the night any less special.

again, im sorry if this isn’t the best response, but i do hope that you have a good night 🫶🏻

[hanarchy]

i know its old that i complain so much and i feel bad for complaining but its also my blog and its like. honestly and genuinely sth that makes me sad and i wish it didnt bc it feels so silly and i KNOW its fine but here we are, i’m sad

cover me is literally the best balad skz have ever made and its soso beautiful but jisung has .2 lines in it like he’s BARELY present theres so little of him on it that i didnt even catch it at all on first listen and it just makes me sad that they finally made a really lovely sad song and he just. isnt on it lol

and YES i know its dumb of me to care like i know i know i KNOW all of these things and for the LONGEST time i really didnt but lately it has just been so apparent how little opportunities he gets. everyone else gets advertising deals and invites to events and magazine photoshoots and OSTs and he gets ONE short online naver article without interview or pictures and every hanner on twitter has a heart attack and he goes out of his way to thank the writer in person. like felix gets articles like that and no one even notices anymore, it happens so much.

and like. it’s just frustrating because i absolutely believe that they all deserve the most success. i want them all to do well and be beloved and i think they’re all so talented and exceptional and i have nothing but love for all of them but. han is my favorite and he’s my favorite for a REASON. he’s so incredible.

and it used to be that he had a lot of presence on skz songs so there was nothing to complain about but it has been shrinking so much even though he is consistently improving and getting more versatile, more creative, more experimental and more powerful.

people love to bring up his skz records and i agree, they’re amazing but why is it that thats the only thing he ever gets? like i’m sorry but that’s nothing. they’re great for the fans and i wish they got more attention but literally no one outside the fanbase pays attention to it and the ONLY reason he’s overrepresented in them is bc HE MAKES THEM HIMSELF????? a lot of the time with only chan or one other producer???? like no one from the company or from any press or anything is even involved…

people also love to bring up that overall he still has the most lines in skz but thats literally only bc of the record/player album and bc he has so many lines in old songs when he was the only one who could do most of the stuff he does and bc he took over so many of nr.9’s lines when they rerecorded. like they always bring him in when another member can’t do sth. like the you in my blurred memories stage was 99% certainly supposed to be danceracha but lino was injured. and it SHOULDNT have been danceracha it shouldve been jisung, seungmin and jeongin. like they wouldve ate, i wouldve accepted changbin instead of seungmin but jeongin shouldve beeeen there.

and yes, i am aware that this may be his own choice. i’m on record saying that i would probably be like him if i were an idol like i would fuckin hate to be invited to the met gala i gotta be honest but i guess i’m selfish and want more of him :(

oh! and i’m aware i could make almost this exact post abt chan. which is equally as frustrating

[astrophelstella]

Lumine and Languages

Part of my Immortal!Traveler Headcanons

Lumine and Aether have been thru plenty if worlds. They probably had to learn multiple languages just to inderstand anything. You know the more languages you learn, the easier you pick up on them.

So Lumine could know hundred of languages and tongues. Though she might be rusty in some of them bc she hasn't had to speak or practice after leaving a world. It also makes her either very skilled or a master at grasping languages.

Let's be real. Paimon wouldn't be the most talented teacher. It's canon at the beginning that Paimon was the first person she met after 500 years and that landed her the job of teaching Lumine Teyvat's language. But while Paimon could have lots of knowledge idk on how good she would be in teaching a whole language to an alien.

Unless Lumine is already used to picking up different ways of speaking. All she needs is a few pointers and some interaction then she's made incredible progress. Practically learned how to read and write the native tongue in a month.

Also on Teyvat's language. In-game it seems to be English and thats it. (minus Hilichurlian ofc dam u Ela Musk and maybe Khaenr'iah but I mean commonly used languages) But in a world building and logical perspective, it made sense if every nation had its own language. Obviously it the language of the country each nation was inspired by. (Monstadt = German)

Honestly there's a lot of shenanigans that could ensue with different languages in canon and the Traveler.

Lumine could just easily pretend to not understand a lick of Inazuman. All the while she's picking up everything people say around her bc they lower their guard around a foreigner.

Childe not knowing Lumine could speak Snezhnaya until she gets annoyed enough at him to cuss him out in his native tongue. (He thought her accent was cute, also wow he didn't even know some of those swear words)

Lumine calling her friends in Monstadt endearing terms in their language for the first time and it puts some of them in shock then flustered. (I wanna call Diluc Liebling to his face and watch him turn red)

Conversing with Zhongli in Liyuean (idk if that's what its called) bc he talks so much maybe he'd be happy speaking in his native dialec. Also using an ancient Liyuean dialect makes him nostalgic.

Saying Sumeru character names how a native would say it. They're all impressed at Lumine's pronunciation. Al-Haitham digs for info on how many languages she knows and is surprised to know she can speak one from every nation and some ancient ones.

(I just realized Al-Haitham in game says u had to know at least 20 languages to graduate the Akademiya. But we never hear anything about other languages besides a few?? Do ancient languages count? How many are there in Teyvat? I wasn't expecting double digits)

And lastly....

Lumine and her brother speaking to each other in their mother tongue. A dead language at this point, with only two people knowing and using it. But they had always made sure to speak to each other that way. One part to keep it alive, and two, to keep private conversation private.

Now she's alone without her brother. Sometimes she'll speak to herself in her language or sing a song from home. It never fails to make her sad but comforted too.

Then one of her friends hears her. Curiouse, they ask her to teach them a few words. Her heart feels just a little bit lighter when they say a sentence in her mother tongue.