#i should workshop that story some more now that i’m not. 15. lol.

[treecakes]

whagever i’ll post all my doodles here. i felt bad for mikey and leaving them out earlier so here is mikey and eilidh together. do not separate them.

[harrystylescherry]

Hey need some help!!! Lately I’ve been hooking up with this guy who’s older than me (he’s 27 and I’m 22) and yesterday we were talking about fan fictions bcs we saw a meme on tt lol and he started saying that these stories are just for kids/teenagers and all of them are awful which I disagreed and told him ofc there’s stories that are bad but there’s so many good writers who’s start writing fan fictions, and that’s not only for kids!! I told him that I like reading them sometimes and then we just dropped the cvs But now I’m thinking... do you think that can come off somewhat immature? Like reading these fics about celebrities when you’re an adult. bcs sometimes I already feel like I’m too old to even be in the fandom :( I also think that being in a “relationship” with a older person makes me evaluate that even more. Do you think I’m crazy for thinking that way? 😖

so like, im going to be completely honest with you:

at first, when i got back into reading and writing fanfiction i felt really weird about it and kind of embarrassed? Because so often it’s talked about as a joke, as though it’s only something teenage girls do--and anything attributed to teenage girls always comes with that shame attached because society cannot stand young women and refuses to acknowledge that they are capable of having great taste and understanding society and culture and music and literature, etc. For a really long while, I kept my fanfics a secret and my blog a secret because I was SO embarrassed about it. 

I used to openly write fanfic in high school and no one cared because i was 15, but it feels like it comes with extra baggage now which is fucked up and not fair. Because YOU’RE RIGHT--there are a lot of good fanfic writers out there! a lot of us don’t just write fanfic, but poetry and short stories, some of us are going to school for creative writing (me) or lit and take this shit very seriously--which no one ever seems to think about? We very easily get written off as being immature and talentless because if we had actual writing ability then we would be writing something different--it’s all bullshit. 

my bf (i’ve been with him for 6 years) knows I write fanfiction and doesn’t care. Like, the man literally could not care less and it’s the only kind of work of mine he doesn’t read because its harry fanfic, not because it’s bad or he thinks i should be embarrassed. 

im in a nonfiction workshop right now. a few nights ago, we ALL admitted to writing and reading fanfic at some point and that some of us still do! we then started buddy reading fucking 1d fics--there was no shame attached. we had fun. people were sending links to their star wars fics and 1d fics and other shit. 

the fact is, whoever you’re with is the immature one. They’re writing all fanfic writers off as not being good simply because they’re not writing something he deems as important or interesting. How many fics has he read to know they’re bad? Is he a writer? you know how many writers have written fanfic at some point? a fuck ton. it’s not an uncommon thing at all. no offense to your mans, but he sound a little high and mighty and he has no right to be. and the fact is...i’ve read fanfics that are written better than published novels. 

basically: you’re not crazy for feeling that way. i think at some point we all have. but you have to realize that you aren’t the problem and that you shouldn’t be embarrassed. fandoms and fanfic aren’t for everyone but they aren’t inherently bad or immature. a lot of fics on tumblr could be fucking published, they’re that good. just because Harry is in it, does by no means make the work any less valuable or intelligent. like, isn’t it better/nice/fun to read a love story about someone you’re actually attracted to? sometimes i read romance novels and the guy is described and im like: ew no thanks. THAT DOESN’T HAPPEN HERE! Frankly, I think your dude sucks for saying that and that he’s completely wrong. 

you and i are the same age and harry’s older than us so like....we’re chillen (not that theres anything wrong with people who are older than him who write and read fics bc there isn’t) but in my mind im still a teenager writing about the older hottie, you know?

[aromoji]

So I’m finally getting around to do that aspec Q & A that @ace-and-aro-wlw-positivity posted, and I have quite a few aspec ocs so this could get rather lengthy but here we go

1. What was your inspiration for your character(s)? Are they modeled on yourself, a person that you know, or a character that’s already been established?

My first aspec oc, Abby Scott, was based on myself when I thought I was a biromantic ace girl. So she takes a lot after me. 

Theo Yamada, on the other hand, was a completely new character. I don’t exactly remember why I made him alloarospec, and I’ve been flipping from one arospec identity to the other, but no matter what he always remained alloaro. 

Mina Nicholson was my first character that I had predetermined to be alloaro from the start. She’s based on an old tumblr post about some super hero series idea called “Aces and Arrows.” I obviously didn’t make Mina into some superhero, but her guitar skills make her come pretty close :D. 

Brittany Olajobi is also based on an old tumblr post. Remember the “All or Nothing” idea thing that was floating around here?(Yes, I’m aware it turned into a scam, but I thought the premise was cute). Since no one actually made anything out of that I decided to make the characters my own. The asexual and pansexual girls were roomates....but also girlfriends. That idea kinda evolved into one of my newer series called “Play the Rainbow”, but that’s gonna take a while to explain.

Queenie Brooks...is based on a crude caricature someone made of an ace person (the “artist” has probably never talked to an ace person outside of tumblr but whatever), so I took that character and fleshed her out. She’s an aroace trans girl who’s evry big in activist circles, especialy the sex worker industry

2. How much, if any, has your character(s) changed since they were first created? What caused this change?

Abby and Brittany haven’t changed much besides in their appearance, Queenie and Mina underwent drastic appearance changes since they were created, and Theo’s kinda been going back and forth on the aromantic spectrum,  from strictly aro to demiromantic to aroflux. I’ve finally settled one greyromantic, which coinicdentially is what I identify as.

4. Do you intend on publishing your story one day? Why, or why not?

Probably not. I’m closeted in real life and likely to stay that way as long as I’m financially dependent on my parents.

7. Time to get serious for a bit. There’s been heavy debate on having non-human characters identify as ace, aro, non-binary, etc., but never actual humans. As someone who’s aspec, how would you explain to someone who’s allo why this can be and is seen as hurtful?

Ace and Aro people have been seen as inhuman and robotic for not feeling attraction, especially not in the same way that people who aren’t aro or ace do. Please reconsider making that animal/robot/alien oc aspec unless all or most of your characters aren’t human as well.

8. It’s a sad reality that many stories in mainstream media don’t have characters that are aspec, not to mention without resorting to harmful stereotypes. Besides there being nothing wrong with IDing as aspec, why did you choose to have your character ID as such? What would you tell other authors who’re interested in writing characters that are aspec, but are afraid of offending the community?

I make my characters aspec because. I’m aspec. Also there aren’t a lot of aspec representation (the little we get lol) that isn’t white or cis or yes, heteromantic./heterosexual. Considering the fact that I’m none of those things, all of my aspec ocs are poc like me, some even trans as well. To authours who want to write aspec characters but don’t want to offend the community, PLEASE ask around. Ask more than one person of that specific demographic. Their opinion should not be the only one that shapes yours! Also, if you’re writing an alloaro character, don’t ask someone who’s alloace or aroace. Similarly, don’t ask an alloaro person about writing alloace/aroace characters. Aspec people are not a monolith, our experiences are not the same

9. If you’re comfortable with sharing, what is your characters’ identity? Do they use any microlabels? Does theirs reflect your own?

Abby is a biromantic ace, Theo is a greyromantic bisexual, Mina is an alloaro bisexual, Brit is an ace lesbian, and Queenie is an oriented aroace trans woman.

11. Why do you think that not just representation is important, but GOOD representation? Can you offer any examples?

Fiction affects reality. Therefore, how people see us in the media affects how they see us in real life.

14. What’s a brief biography of your character? Is their history, personality, and/or looks similar to your own?

Uh I don’t necessarily have biographies for them but I have an oc carrd with their details

15. What are the themes of your story? Is it a lighthearted adventure, or are we talking deep, ocean-sized levels of angst? Why, or why not, did you choose them?

It’s a mix of light hearted fun and lots of angst. But everyone (who deserves it) gets a happy ending so it’s all good.

16. How long have you been writing? Has your style changed from when you first began to now? What are some tips you’d give to those who’re interested in writing a story of their own, be it professionally or as a hobby?

I’ve been writing since I was 8. I once won an honorable mention in a writing competition in the third grade believe it or not lol. My writing has definetely changed a lot, and that’s partially thanks to my English teachers I had along the way. My advice to people interested in writing a story on their own is to invest in a laptop/notebook and find time to write. Any time at all.

17. What’s your process for writing? Do you plan your story out first, write whatever you want then edit later, or both? How might this help others?

Planning? Ha! I write as I go. Sometimes I go back and edit entire scenes before publishing tho.

18. Your book’s become quite popular, easily reaching the New York Times Bookseller list, and now, you’ve been picked to lead a writing workshop. It goes swimmingly, and afterward, someone comes and tells you that your book not only inspired them to write a story of their own, but also helped them discover and accept their identity. What’s your reaction?

I’m...not good with compliments.

20. Just for fun, write down a paragraph of your most recent writing. It can be an action-packed scene, some witty dialogue, or a colorful description that you really enjoyed. (Be sure to properly tag any possible triggers!)

Here’s what I’ve started working on:

Theo smooths out the wrinkles on his blue uniform, giving himself a once over in the mirror. All his belongings of 5 long years were packed and ready to board on the ship the  higher-ups would issue to him He turns and takes down one last poster and rolls it up, placing it in his duffel bag. Perfect. Now all he had to do was go through the graduation ceremony and he’d get his first assignment. His hard work being at the top of his class was finally going to pay off.

“Heyyyy, my older twin’s looking sharp tonight!” Trent exclaims, leaning in the doorway with his own uniform in red. He whirls into the room, flopping on the now barren bed. “Ahh, this bed has so many memories. Come on, sit with me!”

“Trent, the ceremony’s so soon.”

“Theooooo,” he pouts. “This may be the last time we see this room, because we’ll be in space!”

He wiggles his fingers in Theo’s face for dramatic effect. The older twin chuckles, taking a seat on the bed.

“Let’s see,” Theo muses, tapping his chin thoughtfully. “I remember when we first got here. We were 10 years old, tiny, adorable and innocent little creatures. You were so terrified because they had put us in separate rooms.”

“I was not!” Trent argues. “It was just…a bit of a shock considering I always slept with someone else in my room instead of…all by myself.’

“Whatever. You crept into my room in the middle of the night, poked me awake and gave me the whole puppy-dog-eyes-and-quivering-bottom-lip routine to get me to beg me to let you sleep in my bed that night.”

“And you pretty much told me to go play in traffic,” he laughs. “And I still got in your bed anyway and slept there the whole night!”

“And you kept doing it until you turned 12!” Theo finishes with a playful shove.

[missfaber]

author interview

I was tagged by @orangeflavoryawp, thank you so much! 

I already know I’m going to enjoy this way too much, writing is such a lonely endeavor and I just love talking about it, sooo... I apologize in advance for rambling. 

name: Madeline/Maddie 

fandoms: this is complicated because there’s fandoms I very much consider myself a part of because they’re just a huge part of my life, even though I don’t contribute content to them, and then there’s fandoms I do create content for. So idk where the line is drawn! 

fandoms I contribute/ have contributed to: Avatar the Last Airbender, Game of Thrones, Merlin BBC, Once Upon a Time, Legend of Korra

fandoms I haven’t contributed to but are so dear to me: Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings (my two favorite things ironically lol), and lots more 

where you post: AO3, used to be ff.net and livejournal too

most popular one shot: by kudos, it’s as if death itself was undone (zutara, atla: katara wakes up to azula in their house and wants to find out a) why she is welcome b) why zuko is acting so weird) 

most popular multichapter: by kudos, it’s soldier, go bravely on (jonsa + gendrya, got, complete, rewrite of the last episode of got with sweetness and angst and action, and may i say some common sense?)

favorite story you wrote: fuck omg this is difficult lol! because I both criticize and love all my stories in equal measure, I honestly don’t write anything that i don’t love, that doesn’t give me butterflies / actual chest pain (from angst). I feel like I’m being asked to choose a favorite child lol. so I’ll try to justify these picks somehow... 

closest to my heart: soldier, go bravely on (also mentioned above). this is the fic that brought me back to writing fic, and to tumblr even! I was on hiatus (that I didn’t know was a hiatus because I had no intention of coming back) for six years before writing this fic. I wrote it so quickly after the got finale, it was such a passionate and fevered few days and it just sucked me back in to everything I used to love as a teenager. It was also a nice stretch out of my comfort zone, because of the dialogue (which was so tightly planned it’s ridiculous, I wrote the whole fic as a screenplay type thing first to make sure there wasn’t a single dialogue word not needed) and tv-episode style. It’s also such a wish-fulfillment fic that I can’t read certain parts without getting a bit teary. for all those reasons and more, this fic will always be so special to me. 

most proud of: wolf, circle north (jonsa, got, alternate season 7 & 8). this is the longest fic I’ve ever attempted and the number I’ve hours I’ve sunk into it is astounding and i should be ashamed.  It’s going to be obscenely long (my outline is 70+ chapters) and when I pull it off, best believe it’s going into a bound book so I can look at how thicc it is and be like, “I did that!” lol. The range of POVs is one of the most challenging but most rewarding part of this fic, and why I’m so proud of it. This is another wish-fulfillment fic for me, not just because it’s another fix-it fic but because I have been writing bits and pieces of this fic for about three years. I kept thinking of jonsa scenarios and little scenes I would have loved to see after season 6 and writing them in a little secret doc, just for me, as I never thought I’d write fic again. After writing “soldier” i had already broken my hiatus and I realized this fic was an actual possibility, so I put it out into the world. I couldn’t be more happy that I did that. Not only did it give me the chance to be in such an excellent, lovely fandom, but the feedback I get is so validating after having this be my secret little project for so long.  

most formative: Coffee & Cigarettes, (merthur, merlin bbc) I’m ashamed to list this and the merthurs reading this 100% want to kill me for having the audacity because it’s incomplete and hasn’t been updated since 2013 when there’s only one chapter left so what’s my excuse?  I call this the most formative for me because until I published this I didn’t really have a fic that people followed and liked, eagerly awaited updates for, and commented regularly on. I was writing a lot of one-shots and atla stuff on tumblr (I used to RP lmao I was like 15 ok?) This was the first time I experienced so many fic-life things, like being excited to get AO3 emails, etc. This was the first time I started to really focus on character which is so important to me now, my writing is completely character driven. Not to mention Merlin and Arthur’s dumbassery and sheer attraction and denial is just... *chef’s kiss* 

guiltiest pleasure: my recent foray into nedsei, who am I??? one more word and you won’t survive, just international hate sex

story you were most nervous to post: ummm idk I’m usually excited not nervous, since for me fic writing is just fun, I write things I’d enjoy reading and that I’m proud of. I read my own fics more than anyone else does, I guarantee it. am I a narcissist? who knows I guess I’ll say “soldier” again because I hadn’t posted fic in six years.

how you choose your titles: wow the hardest part of fic writing for me!!!!! thanks!!!!! lol. Okay so for my work titles, which are always terrible and I literally regret them immediately after posting, it’s usually just some words I play around with and string together that are somewhat thematic and related to the work... they’re always terrible lmao, I hate making titles. I mean, look at “soldier, go bravely on” and “wolf, circle north” for god’s sake, I hate them lmao. But I have to pick a title to post, so!!! For chapter titles and one-shots I’ll usually go with a song lyric, and especially for my chapter titles I spend so long seeking out the perfect one that reflects some thematic or emotional content of the chapter somehow. I’m very proud of my chapter titles for wolf, circle north. I have a doc on my scrivener just for chapter titles that I created in the very early stages of writing it, where I just dumped HUNDREDS of song lyrics that I thought I might use. Then by them I wrote some scenarios where they could work. here’s a screenshot:

It’s so helpful now. Sometimes posting an update will take an hour more than necessary because of me going through that doc, finding the perfect lyric. 

do you outline: OH, DO I OUTLINE... Hell Yeah, I outline. I couldn’t live without outlining. I love outlining. My outlines have outlines. I’m a planner centric, calendar centric, bullet-journal bitch so of course I love outlining. In all seriousness though: I write out of chronological order. I feel my writing is best when I write the scene I’m in the mood to write- unfortunately this scene could be ten chapters down the line from the chapter I’m gonna post next. This is the biggest reason outlining is necessary for me. If I didn’t have an outline, my story would be a non-post-able mess. 

I wasn’t kidding when I said my outlines have outlines. For wolf, circle north I have, um, a few. Character/location centric outlines where I bullet every scene that needs to happen for that plot to happen cohesively (these were all more or less completed before I even started writing the fic), then a “loose” outline that I copy everything from the other outlines into for some semblance of chronological order, then a Polished Final Outline that I write from. I know that sounds psychotic. It’s how my brain works. Some photo evidence/explanation:

And here’s a screengrab of my Final Outline, this is pretty much how it is all the way down- The POV character is italicized in the front, I talk to myself a lot in there, let myself get carried away, will sometimes write out whole segments of the scene if they come to me while outlining. Spoilers for chapters 1-3 of w,cn I guess!!!

Then, because scrivener is awesome, I get to see this outline in the corkboard view (I input every scene as a card) and so I get to see every part of my outline as a Synopsis on the right hand side of the doc where I’m writing the scene:

The POV and status tags (which are completely customizable) on the lower right are helpful too. This post is just a scrivener ad. 

complete: 9 works 

in progress: 4 works

coming soon / not yet started: I have so many fics in the works, I’m an indulgent person so if an idea comes to me I usually go with it for a time. I’ve had a very not-serious Jonsa PLL AU I’ve been writing on and off since summer. I have three different fairytale AUs (also jonsas) I’ve been working on and one time travel AU for @sunbeamsandmoonrays. I can’t say when or if any of these will see the light of day, because my priority is my WIPs and my original writing. But the most prevalent are my Halloween fics (one jonsa, one gendrya, one merthur) which I really want to be able to put out this month, but only if I meet some other goals. I’m trying to rein in my indulgent ass, ya’ll. 

do you accept prompts: no. sorry! but I do workshop ideas with friends, for example the nedsei fic happened that way by talking with @flibbertigiblet. But I don’t take writing prompts in my inbox. 

upcoming story you are most excited to write: my halloween merthur fic. it’s witchy, sassy, and I’m so excited to get back into the heads of these characters.

Tagging! @uchihabat @anniebibananie @noqueenbutthequeeninthenorth @sailorshadzter @vivilove-jonsa and any other lovely writer soul who wants to do this!

[hepburnlangham]

@catsbreads

After finally finishing all the chalices, I have developed the Official Tea™ on all the chalice bosses. This is one hundred and ten percent objective and I am completely right.

1. Pthumerian Descendant. The perfect balance of a boss. This isn’t as great as Kos, Gascoigne, Maria, or any of the story mode greats, but this fight stands out as the most challenging without either being a total parry fest or a beasty clusterfuck. The patterns are hard to read and the timings are hard to nail down, making this fight much more engaging than the standard hunter-type fights. The only thing I don’t like is his boomerang move thing, since he’s gotten some very cheeky kills on me through it, but whatever. That’s mostly my fault.

2. Pthumerian Elder. How many times do we gotta teach you this lesson, old man?? Sit down smh. He comin’, oh lord. He fuckin’ swinging! He’s gonna smack ya with that flaming scythe!!! Oh shit wait he transformed it into a flame crossbow! This old man has style.

3. Undead Giant, Chain variant specifically. It’s an interesting change of pace, since he’s not very aggressive at all so you’re playing offence instead of defence. Figuring out how to safely get in at all is fun, though it can be a really slow fight if you play it safe.

4. Keeper of the Old Lords. Cool hat!!!!!! Similar to Forgotten Madmen in that it’s a fairly standard hunter fight where you just spam viscerals, but it’s neat. :) Defiled version is notable for being the only boss in that chalice that doesn’t fucking suck.

5. Forgotten Madmen. I’m a sucker for PvE hunter fights so this one delivers. Another dude swooces in to give you some combo slaps. The armor they give is very cool. I like shlapping around with the snake scarf.

6. Bloodletting Beast. Thicc boy. He has a lot of slaps to give you. A great iteration of the standard beast boss. The headless version later on gets a special shout-out for being an actually interesting reused boss, since it’s got some new moves that change it up a bit. Plus the weird snake thing popping out is uhhhhh gross in the best way

7. Beast-possessed Soul. Isn’t this that random dude at the bottom of the Healing Church Workshop? I always killed him with a backstab into a visceral before he could even do anything so it’s nice that they fleshed him out into an actual boss. Nothing too complex here, just a nice and simple fight.

8. Blood-starved Beast. The arena gimmick of all that poison water is an interesting addition-- you’re basically always going to be poisoned by the time you get to the final phase. Kind of annoying but it’s interesting enough and the fight was solid enough as is.

9. Merciless Watchers. I find these funny little dudes to be endearing despite being weirdly easy. They appear as pretty regular enemies in later chalices which is cool, good sense of progression. I dunno they’re just neat :)

10. Yarnham, Queen of Pthumuru. The most narratively relevant boss, which is very cool, and the gimmick is interesting, but ultimately it’s, uh… It feels like this boss should have happened a lot earlier? By the time you get to the final chalice, you’ve already been through so much shit that this is a walk in the park. Hell, the two bosses right before her were way harder. I’ve literally never had a problem with this fight. All you gotta do is spam R1. Honestly only saved by being cool and not being offensively annoying in any way.

11. Ebrietas. Weird slug insect beast thing? Who is she. I used two summons for this fight and it took like twenty seconds so uhhhhh lol

12.Loran Darkbeast. Paarl V2. Not a bad fight persay, but it’s not particularly interesting outside of getting punched in the face with electricity. Weirdly easy if you get some momentum going. Kind of just a standard beast boss honestly, but at least this time it’s actually challenging unlike story Paarl.

13. Abhorrent Beast. Suspicious Beggar’s wild twin brother. Cool design, but it’s really obvious he was never meant to be a boss since the fight’s basically the same thing the whole way through. Fighting this multiple times in the fixed dungeons was… annoying. I fought him twice in a row due to the chalice route I chose.

14. Watchdog of the Old Lords. First fight is fun, you fight a big fire dog. He slaps you around like a treat ball a bit as monsters often do with hunters. Defiled version is trash, though. Fire damage barely scales with the HP loss so you just die a lot. Encourages cheesy play, which is always bad.

15. Rom. Did we really need a second iteration of the world’s least spidery spider? No. Now it’s just worse because it has none of the narrative meaning or the cool setting.

16. Amygdala. While I don’t necessarily like this fight much anyway, the Defiled chalice version is incredibly awful. The amount of one-shots this boss has is just infuriating, and the only consistently viable strategies are incredibly cheesy and tedious. The only reason this isn’t at the bottom is because it’s an actual boss that poses actual challenge compared to the next four.

17. Celestial Emissary. This guy is actually a threat for once, unlike how he is in the main story, but even then he’s still really easy. The only way you’re gonna die is if you’re not even trying.

18. Loran Silverbeast. Just a wolf guy. At least it’s one of the less bad enemies that they reused as a boss for some reason.

19. Maneater Boar. The fact that they stopped caring at this point really just jumps out. The pigs were scary when you meet them for like, the first time you ever play Bloodborne, but now they’re just… bad.

20. Brainsucker. This squid boy isn’t even a boss! He has no talent. Awful.

[sometimesrosy]

Not ship related... I admire you so much, the way you talk about writing is so beautiful. It’s my passion and dream, I feel like I can change my whole world with my writing. But my parents keep telling me that I won’t get money doing that, that I’m not talented enough and already too old at 24. Should I give up on this? Maybe my talent is in my head and I’m leading myself to disappointment? Light me up Rosy! :c

:D this is so sweet. I am glad that I could help you be inspired, that is my calling, I think.

Listen honey. I don’t make money off my writing. I’ve made money off my blog and social media and art and tarot and teaching and curriculum planning. If you’re expecting writing to support you or make you rich, you should PROBABLY adjust your thinking. Most writers make some small amount of money like 10k a year or something. Being a writer is a SMALL BUSINESS. This is not something I realized when I started out a bright eyed and bushy tailed kid. Some do manage to make a living just off of writing novels or something, but most have to supplement their income with other things, whether that’s a full time job, family support, a rich mate, teaching, editing, freelancing or what have you. 

BUT that doesn’t mean you can’t do it. I’m kind of starting over with my writing career, not because I ever stopped WRITING. Writing I’ve done continuously since I was 15, and I write to stay sane, to have fun, to connect with people, to think, and because I am actually compelled to write. I can’t stop writing. Whether it is novels and stories, poems, meta, blogs, a journal or whatever. I write because I must. And I’ve spent YEARS learning about the craft and practicing. Drafting, revising, editing, reading, workshopping, discussing, etc. When I decided to become a teacher, I thought I was giving up writing, but it only deepened my commitment to writing and actually gave me a better platform as a writer, more authority, more options, more experience. It turns out nothing teaches you how to do a thing better than teaching others how to do it. And now I can use what I learned as a teacher to improve my career as a writer, and improve my writing, too. 

Writing is NOT just writing. And the business of writing is something entirely different. I ignored the business aspect for years, and instead focused on the craft, education, psychology, spirituality and ART of writing. Now I’m WAY older than you and am trying to get back into the business side. It feels very intimidating, but because I’ve done all that work in other areas, I find I am farther along than I thought I was. 

Because I am not economically privileged and never have been, I’ve always had to support myself doing something else, whether that was scholarships, or waiting tables, or teaching, or freelance marketing, or even being a stay at home mom (which worked for a few years for writing but was not sustainable due to economics and life.) It’s PART of the the economic reality for almost everyone who takes on writing. But, because I’ve always had the focus of wanting to be a writer, it turns out that everything I’ve done while supporting myself has fed into my career as a writer. I can now pull on my background as a teacher, in a service industry, as a curriculum designer, as a blogger, as an artist, as a marketer, to create a career with many moving parts.

This is what I learned about this gig economy. Don’t expect to hit it big in one area. Going viral is HARD. When I DID go viral, it actually took me AWAY from my writing. I spent years working on that instead of my writing career, although I was still writing. And you can’t predict it and you can’t depend on one platform to be stable and not collapse in on itself. So, learn MULTIPLE fields, so that you can have MULTIPLE streams of income. If you don’t have a partner or family money supporting you, and you don’t want to work a day job, and you don’t want to be poor, and you don’t hit it big out of the gate, try to diversify, so you can still do what you love and have money coming in from various places.

It is work to do this, but it offers you more freedom, and can also support your writing career. 

Oh. I forgot. Are you too late to have a writing career? Lol. No. You’re a journeyman still. Still learning. Writing is not like being a dancer, where your body has to be young to be at its best. As a writer, you just get better as you age, so you have time. Keep going.  When you’re older, you’ll look back at your writing now and see how much growth you’ve had. It’s not that you’re not talented now, it’s that your writing is a journey and a process, and it won’t stop growing.

Are you fooling yourself about your talent? I can’t know that. I’m guessing not. But here’s another secret about writing. TALENT is not how you succeed. WORK and COMMITMENT is how you succeed. (and success is relative.) It doesn’t matter how talented a person is, if they don’t commit to the work, they won’t finish a book. If they don’t commit despite the struggle, because it IS hard, then they won’t continue to write. They’ll give up and become, idk, an editor or car salesman or something. If they don’t keep working, they won’t have a writing career. 

So if you want it. Keep doing it. Be realistic about the struggles, about the financial realities, about your needs in life, about commitments and sacrifices. Because you WILL have to sacrifice things in order to be a writer. Even if it’s just time and energy, you have to give it to the writing. And the less support you have, the more you have to give up in order to keep writing. 

I hope this isn’t disheartening. I’m trying to be real here. This is an un-romanticized version of a romanticized bohemian writer’s life style. It might look lovely and problem free from the outside, but it is NOT. It’s just as hard as a more traditional life. No. It’s harder, because you’re swimming against the stream. It would be easier to get a corporate job and just do what your bosses told you.

But if you want to be a writer, as an artist and a small business person, you aren’t choosing the easy way out. So be aware. Your parents are right about it being a struggle. But they are wrong about it being impossible, or not worth the struggle. You get to choose the work you want and the sacrifices you make. I’d rather struggle like this than sacrifice my creativity to a career I don’t want to do.

[azariaspace]

Goals Assessment

An assessment of these posts and their feasibility and achievement or lack thereof so far as I’ve moved on campus and tomorrow’s the last day before school starts.

It’s under a read more for good reason (it is hecka long), but I really want my friends (and anyone!) to read it and see how much I’ve grown.

18 Goals for 2018

1. Pass all my classes (interim, spring freshman, and fall semester).  I want to say with As, but a) interim is just pass/fail and b) that doesn’t really matter.  Also, learn to study.

So, yikes, I didn’t do that.  I didn’t do the thing with all A’s and I didn’t do the thing with the simply passing, either.  But I failed two last fall and I failed one in the spring, so we’re doing better, and I’m retaking the two I failed in the fall this fall, so we’re atoning.  I also think I know how to pass them.  I really know how to study.

2. Get a job during interim, get a sustainable job for during the semester, and get a real job for during the summer.

I didn’t get a job during interim (well, I acquired one then, but I didn’t start it then), but I did get one during the semester!  I don’t know what I meant by “real job”, but I worked at a church in the summer.  I’m also working as a props master this year, which is a theatre and a management job, so it’s fun and real?

3. Become my floor’s Barnabas (the position that leads the spiritual development of the floor – something I would apply for and get in interim/early second semester freshman year and start as a sophomore).

Yes!  Did it.  Crushed it.  Just finished training.

4. Become an RA (something I would apply for… again… as a sophomore in the fall, even if I wouldn’t start working until 2019).

Haven’t yet had the chance to try, but I’ve already been asked about it.

5. Learn to drive and have a car on campus.

Nope, but I did start learning!

6. Have more than $1,000 in checking and savings.  Be fiscally responsible. Also, tithe.

2 outta 3 ain’t bad?  I have more than $1,000 in each, and I’m fiscally responsible.  I don’t tithe, but I’ve started a program to get there.

7. Go camping, or at least hammock often.  Also, get more plants.

Got more plants and I’ve got a hammock which I’ve used a bit.

8. Be a minimalist, both on-campus and at home.  And be an environmentally-responsible minimalist.

I got rid of a lot of stuff, but I don’t think I’m a minimalist yet.

9. Deepen my personal spiritual faith.

Jesus and I had a bit of a time.  But we’re working on it.

10. Become a full-fledged vegetarian.  Hop off the pescatarian train.

Crushed it.  Haven’t eaten meat since the first of the year.

11.  Sleep at a reasonable hour.

Lol.

12. Do CTC again, but only when it’s helpful and feasible.  (So definitely interim and spring, but maybe not fall – and if not, that’s okay.)

I LITERALLY JUST SWITCHED FROM TAKING IT FOR CREDIT TO AUDITING IT I AM SO PROUD OF MYSELF TURN UP.  I still get the community without the stress.

13. Make sure my FYP (four-year-plan) is realistic, because I should have to take more classes than I have to.  Also look into auditing psych classes, or maybe just… take them.

I haven’t looked at it in forever oops.

14. Start serving at the church I’m going to.  Also, be serious about my attendance there.

I didn’t go back to that church and didn’t start serving the church I then went to.  Then I worked at a church, but got paid for it, so this is a fail.

15. Be serious about my meals.  If I’m on the 21 meal plan, use all 21.  Evaluate whether 15 is realistic.  Learn to cook.

This is half a no, but I can’t fix it because now I’m on unlimited meals.  I did learn how to cook though!

16. Sleep more and at decent times. And work on other things, like washing your face and using lotion so your hands aren’t dry.  I need to take care of myself.  And that includes seeing a therapist on-campus, because mental health is important, too, and my mind is nebulously… not right.  I’m not equipped to go beyond that, but, if nothing else, I can talk about stuff from my past.

I think the sleep on is a no.  Washing face is a soft maybe.  Lotion is a no.  It’s true that I need to take care of myself.  I saw a therapist thrice and then... stopped.

17. Read more for fun.

I didn’t during the semester, but I did over the summer!

18. Make an Instagram (the one I have now is garbage and is gonna be deleted probably) and take a picture every day.  Learn to appreciate life.  Write a caption – or don’t – but know that what you see is beautiful and a privilege.  The life I am living is beautiful, and even if not every moment is, I am in love with it.  I want to share that.

I remade the Instagram and set the goal, but I didn’t stick with it.  But I think I really did shift how I viewed life, which is the biggest goal of all.

Things I Want to Do This School Year:

-24-Hour Theatre

I really want to do it.  It’s one weekend, and I can spare myself for that long.  It won’t fall on a show weekend (because it’s done by the same people), and it’s not on a mandatory Barnabas day (I can skip anything that might fall on the same weekend).  It’s something I really want.

-fully prop three shows

It’s my job.  I have to.

-ASM a show

Again, it’s my job.  I have to.  But I really want to do it well.

-help the rogue production of AaOL (set designer? Stage manager? Whatever they need)

I think I’m going to have to let this one go.  Arsenic and Old Lace, if it happens at Calvin, will be beautiful, and it will be beautiful without me.  I don’t have the time for two shows at once, let alone two shows and whatever else I do at once.

-host a Seder and cook for it

I want to do this as part of my job as Barnabas, as a gift to my floor, and as an honoring of my ancestry and an expression of where my faith meets my heritage.  Food brings people together like nothing else, and while many people will go home for Easter, many people won’t, and this is a way they can have something special.

-play my uke well

I thought it would be necessary for Dorm Worship, but it won’t be.  We’ll see if it happens.

-bake bread once a week

The quick, simple bread!  Barnabread will be a much rarer commitment.

-write the first draft of a full-length play

I want to work on it if nothing else.

-help lead a club

It’s something I’ve committed to and I want to do it well.

-help rewrite the lgbt dorm workshop

I think I’m going to have to let this one go.  It’s a lot of work I don’t have time for.

-organize and catalog all our props

It’s a bonus part of Props Master I put on myself that I want to see started if not finished.

-make a movie

I think it’ll have to go on the backburner, if not nixed.

-get As in every class

I want it.  My GPA needs it.  Some other goals need it.

-get us gender neutral housing

I really, really want to help with this.

-get the job of ra for next year

I don’t know why this is always on my heart and mind but it is.

-get a theatre summer job

maybe with my current boss

-cold knight plunge

enough said

-get on the Israel trip for next year

I want it

-fuckin learn how to drive and get my license

I want it! (maybe with less swearing tho)

-get in a relationship

If it happens that would be lovely, but bruh I don’t even know if I have time for a relationship.

-clean and be neat

*looks at my desk* hmm wouldn’t it be nice

-sleep eight hours every night

I really want to try!

-do devotions every day

It’s in my schedule!  I really want to try!

-vote

Yes please I need to file for a mail-in ballot

-maybe try therapy again

... we’ll see

-love with reckless abandon

YES PLEASE THIS IS MY WHOLE LIFE RIGHT HERE

Blog about gripes I have with the way my school treats queer students

Mmm yes.  But also no pressure to do so.  Only when it’s useful for me.

Steal and implement the 95 stories project from Hope College

That’s a lot of work.  I want someone else to spearhead it and to be a part of it.

Make a zine about queer student experiences

See above.

Get to a reasonable weight

!!!

Pursue minimalism

Slowly but surely

Read for fun

... Didn’t I see this before?  I feel like it’s healthy and important.

YouTube video at least once a month

I feel like that’s a reasonable goal.

So many deep chats

I’ve already had one with a first-year and like three with my returning friends.

watch my friend finish playing undertale

It’s up to her.

Be on a church council

I’ve committed!  It’s happening.

Choreograph something

It’s for a class lol.  There’s no backing out.  But also I’m so, so excited.

[alextriestowritestuff]

(Almost) First Week of College!

Hey guys!

So I’ve been a little inactive but that’s because I’m a collegiate now! I sound excited but I can feel the stress coming on. I’m in a pre-health program that my school is well known for. The program is mad rigorous and I’m not smart...this entire year will be trainwreck haha. I won’t bore y’all with the “college life” so I’ll stick to writing.

If you don’t know, I’m a freshman at a four year college. I plan to double major in Biochemistry (gotta have a day job :/ I’m kidding, my college requires us to have two majors or major-minor and it’s a pre requisite for dental school so ya) and English with an emphasis in Creative Writing. It seems like a lot but I have enough credits from APs so it’s possible to finish both degrees. Anyway, I’m taking Introduction to Creative Writing as an English credit for my Biochem degree and it doubles as an English elective for my English degree.

And BOIII let me tell ya...

I feel like it’s premature to say this because I’ve only been here for five days but I love all my classes, especially my Creative Writing class. It’s a small class-fifteen including the professor-and even the non-english majors seem excited for the assignments. According to the syllabus, we’re going to write 15 poems and two short stories by the end of the semester which is December 2017. The short stories will begin in November-ish and we will have a choice of either doing fiction for both or one fiction and one non fiction. 

The class meets twice a week for an hour and half. We talked about poetry, techniques, and read poems extensively for the first two days. The prof strongly recommended doing free verse (no rhyming basically) for beginners but if we feel we’re proficient enough, we can do rhymes. I am an unconfident rookie so I stuck to free verse. I started on my first poem today and I attacked it like a novel. I went scrounging the interwebs for a poem outline (I like outlines ok??) or how to do one and the general consensus is: most poets don’t outline. Which makes sense but I’m extra so I outlined it. A few weeks ago, I saw a prompt that sparked an idea so I wrote it in my ideas doc but I knew there wasn’t enough plot to make a novel so I thought it would be a short story. In the end, I decided to use the idea for the poem. It’s similar to a story plot so I figured I’d be in comfort zone while writing the poem.

Writing my first poem was...interesting. I enjoyed not having to think so hard about the characters and their personalities. It was more relaxed. I’ve written the poem and revised it but I’m worried about the stanzas, spacing-the actual appearance of the poem. I had center aligned the doc and it looked bomb af but I don’t if my prof will agree so I right aligned it. I’m not trying to get docked off points. I’m planning to ask him next class though. I ran into a slight wall because I wanted to put dialogue in there but after searching the internet, it’s not necessary. I think my poem will be longer than my classmates but it could just be the spacing. It’s 437 words-about a page and a half long. 

We are going to workshop all the poems and short stories in class. Workshop is writing a piece, making/emailing a copy for everyone in the class, and everyone sits around and discuss/critique your piece. I can take critique but I’ll be crushed if my prof hates it lol. He’s published and has won awards for his work so his opinion carries a lot of weight to me. At the end of the semester, we have to put all our work together and make a writing portfolio. I’m assuming we’ll get to keep it for personal use-i.e. if we wanted to publish a piece in a lit magazine or online. I’m not sure but I’m pretty sure I can publish some of my poems on here after workshop is done. If not, you guys will have to wait till December. 

I will, however, share an excerpt:

“She was so much more than just the red haired girl

She was warm and kind like a tame fire that couldn’t hurt you

The numerous splashes of freckles across her face equaled the amount of words she said in a minute“

Okay so I wrote everything above last week and saved this as a draft so I could update workshop results. So I’ve been in college for two weeks now (yay!) I still enjoy all my classes as well. 

To my surprise, the workshop went extremely well. My classmates and prof loved the imagery and the idea of the story. The consensus criticism was lineation. Every line in a poem should stand alone (not always though) and be structured in a way so it carries impact. Because I had such a long poem, I didn’t play around with the lines and some lines spilled over and some people didn’t know if some words were spillover or purposeful. Everyone also said that they weren’t sure if this was story turned poem because it read like story. Obviously, it was but my prof said it’s a form of poetry called narrative poem. He said we can definitely write narrative and turn it in. 

I’ve gotten confirmation and I can actually share my poems/short stories on here! My creative writing class doesn’t require us to edit our poem and turn it in again but everyone has to write comments and a short paragraph to the writer. Since I don’t want their suggestions to go to waste, I’ll edit my poem and work on its lineation then post it on my tumblr. I’ll create a page on my tumblr and have my poems there if you’d like to read them. I will have this particular poem up by the end of this weekend. I’ll try to remember to reblog this post with a link to page with the poem too but no promises :)

-Thanks for reading!

[bestbooksintheworld-blog]

My least favorite feeling is feeling stuck.

I could be stuck with personal growth, stale in my relationships, fresh out of ideas at work… the list is endless.

The fear of remaining stagnant can be crippling.

I’ve felt that way many, many times. Each time it feels like I’ll never overcome it, like I’m permanently drained of motivation.

Know what I mean? Perhaps you’ve resigned yourself to living a miserable, boring life. Maybe you even believe you don’t deserve better than that. When you feel so bad for so long, it’s hard to imagine life any other way.

I’ve been there too. Many times.

In fact, I’ve made so many trips to Yucklando and back that I’ve proved to myself that my time there isn’t permanent. Some of my trips are definitely longer than others, but I always return.

And because I know I always return home, I’ve made it a habit that every time I’m in a “valley,” I remind myself of aaalllll the other valleys I’ve already been in. I remind myself that this valley is no different than the others, even though it feels like it is. I remind myself that I have felt like this before and that I have overcome it before too.

You don’t have to face the valleys alone. In fact, it’s better not to face them alone. When we’re alone, that’s when the crushing negativity can creep in… all the self-doubt, the worry, and the fear.

We’ve all got little “voices” inside our heads. Sometimes they’re positive, but sometimes they’re negative. When you tell yourself you “can’t” or you’ll “never” or you “don’t deserve it”… those are the voices. And the times when those voices are the loudest? Well, those are the valleys.

To get out of the valleys, you have to shush the negative voices. And the best way to shush ’em isn’t to try and get rid of them — because they’ll always return, saying something different next time. No, the best way to shush the voices is to crowd them out.

How do you crowd ’em out? The answer might surprise you.

Every time you read, you get access to a fresh perspective — and you get to choose that perspective every single time.

Every time you read, you hear other voices besides the ones in your head.

Every time you read, you make your world bigger.

You give yourself the opportunity to grow and improve your life… one word at a time.

So where should you start? I can help with that! Below is a detailed list of 21 motivational books you can use to fill your mind with positive voices, empowering ideas, and inspiration to create a life you love.

1 .The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck by Mark Manson

I bet that title grabbed your attention, huh? It does have a bit of shock value — but it also backs it up with legit advice on how you can determine what to care about… and what not to. Pretty bold thinking, right?

2. Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill

This is one of those books that’s a bit older but makes everyone’s “Best Motivational Books” list. Napoleon conducted dozens of interviews with the most successful and richest people in the early 20th century and drills down into the common traits between them.

3. Awaken the Giant Within by Tony Robbins

Tony Robbins is one of the names most synonymous with self-help books. And for good reason — he’s written six best-selling books about financial freedom, personal development, and more. I especially like this book because he shares what he’s learned about the best ways to help people break through to new levels in life.

4. The Success Principles by Jack Canfield

This is the *perfect* book for those who feel stuck with where they are in life. I’ve totally been there, and this book helped me get out of my slump. With short chapters on each topic, Jack teaches you how to increase your confidence, tackle daily challenges, live with passion and purpose, and make your goals real. You’ll be back on track in no time.

5. Spirit Driven Success by Dani Johnson

Dani Johnson went from being homeless to a millionaire in TWO years. Two years, folks. She’s an ordained minister and teaches how to “unlock the door to biblical wealth and prosperity secrets.” I was so inspired by her story and knew I had to add it to this list.

6. Tools of Titans by Tim Ferriss

Over the last two years, Tim has interviewed the best of the best in the world on his podcast. He’s taken everything he’s learned from those 200+ interviews and packed it into this GINORMOUS book. But don’t let the size intimidate you — think of it as a giant resource for health, wealth, and happiness.

7. Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki

Robert explores the mindset that you don’t have to earn a ton of money to be rich. He’s responsible for changing how millions of people think about money and investing. This is one of the best personal finance books out there.

8. Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg

Ever heard of Facebook? (LOL!) Sheryl Sandberg is the COO of the social media empire, and she’s created a name for herself by teaching women how to take control of their careers and be true leaders in their fields. She shows “specific steps women can take to combine professional achievement with personal fulfillment.”

9. How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

Here’s another old-time classic that you’ll find on many “Best of” lists. It has sold millions of copies over the years and illustrates how to interact with people in an effective way. Communication = the key to success in ANYTHING.

10. Losing My Virginity by Richard Branson

Richard Branson is the founder of Virgin Atlantic Airways, Virgin Records, and more top businesses. He’s one of the most iconic entrepreneurs of our day. This autobiography tells the story of his crazy-interesting life and how he writes his own rules in business. It’s a fresh take on the traditional “self-help” book.

11. Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert

The author of the wildly successful Eat, Pray, Love is back with another book on inspiration, creativity, and conquering the fears that are holding you back. She’s super inspirational and when you finish reading the book, you’ll want to start taking action stat.

12. The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday

You know what I say: Being happy isn’t about having zero problems — it’s being able to solve the problems we do have, no matter how big or small. And that’s why I love this book so much. It shows you how to turn problems into successes.

13. Loving What Is: The Four Questions That Can Change Your Life by Byron Katie

Byron Katie created a process called The Work that helps you see your problems in a different light. This book expands on that process through specific examples of people working through their problems and understanding the underlying thought processes behind them. It’s considered one of the leading books on personal transformation.

14. The Now Habit by Neil Fiore

Are you a procrastinator? Always putting things off and either doing them at the last minute or not doing them at all? I used to be just like that until I read The Now Habit. Now I get my booty in gear and get things done so that I can enjoy my free time faster — without feeling guilty.

15. Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck

You guys know how much I consider mindset to be an integral part in anyone’s success. Well, this book is THE book about mindset. I got so much out of it that I even based part of my Money Mindset Transformation workshop on the principles taught by Dr. Dweck in this book.

16. The Dip by Seth Godin

I’m sure you’ve heard the saying “Winners never quit and quitters never win.” But… sometimes winners DO quit and quitters DO win! But how do you know when to quit or when to push through? Seth teaches exactly that in The Dip.

17. The Millionaire Next Door by Thomas Stanley & William Danko

Being a millionaire doesn’t have to mean you’re flashy or have expensive things. In fact, you could have a millionaire living right next door and not even know it. This book walks you through the seven “rules” all millionaires live by — and they’re probably not what you expect!

18. 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey

Stephen Covey is another highly regarded author in the motivational world. This book came out 25 years ago, but it’s still one of the most recognizable and recommended personal growth books out there.

19. Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz

No, this book is not about robots It’s a shorter, easier way of saying “steering your mind to a productive, useful goal so you can reach the greatest port in the world, peace of mind.” It’s a fairly unknown book compared to others on this list, but Tony Robbins is a fan — and so am I.

20. The War of Art by Steven Pressfield

Here’s another great book about unleashing your creativity and pushing through roadblocks standing in your way. If you’re a wannabe author, this book is for you — Steven Pressfield was over 40 years old when he first got published. You’re never too old!

21. Change Anything by Kerry Patterson & Joseph Grenny

Have you ever tried to make a change in your life (go on a diet, start exercising, etc.) but couldn’t follow through? There’s a reason for that, and this book dives into how you can change your destructive habits and replace them with better behaviors.

This blog contains affiliate links, meaning, if you click through and make a purchase, I may earn a commission. This is at no additional cost to you.

[cjqdion]

term 8: mar. 19 (mon), 2018; 22:09

I have probably reached the point now of totally giving up my course ‘cos I am already typing this long story of me losing interest with my major, Math haha

When I was in elementary and highschool, I really loved Math. I excelled in it not in the way I was the best in class but enough for me to keep doing good in school. That was why I pursued a math degree for college. I thought that maybe this wasn’t a bad idea. Being stuck with math for four years may seem tolerable! (((da hek 15-yr old me lol)))

After three years I spent with college, I have always been in denial about my interest in my course. I would always defend it to every person who would tell me my course is just for the profession of teaching. Although I have nothing against with being a teacher, there is always a stigma around my life that I should get into the corporate world and earn well in that field.

I would always push myself extra hard in my studies and would always aim for being a dean’s lister since I have already tried it twice consecutively in college. Not until my third term of my stay came. There were already subjects being introduced to me that I could not grasp properly nor be able to visualize it. I barely survived it. It was just mostly me trying to pass. I did not bother about my grades anymore and all I could care about was to pass all my subjects and get out of college.

Then I failed one subject. It was a first from me. After retaking it and passed, I thought that maybe I can still pass my other subjects. All I have to do is just focus and study study. Then I had to repeat it to myself every term until it gets exhausting. Until recently, I failed two subjects last term. (uhh what a bummer :( lol) Basically this term I had to repeatedly tell to myself again, yes celine you can do this, just four more terms and you’ll be done with it. And ahhh I just couldn’t take it anymore :( I can’t believe I am just basically spending my years in college just trying to get by and not honing my interest that could be beneficial for my future. :( </3 I really really really used to love studying but now huhu I just can’t properly focus anymore since I already don’t get a lot of things since they are all interrelated from the lessons I didnt get when I was in sophomore till my present lessons today ;((((( <///3

HOWEVER.....

In my journey of trying to survive college as I struggle with my academics, I was able to find passion with other things I never thought I would such as cross-stitch, pottery, and art appreciation! :D Recently, I’ve also been trying to familiarize myself with ibis paint x and do some scribbles with it haha It was also a first for me to actually attend and learn from workshops and art fairs and book fairs and such! :D <3

Well, the things I can really be sure about right now is that:

1.) I cant shift out now cos it’s too late. I’m already taking up thesis and haha idk how to be able to handle to explain this to the relatives lol and bruh just three more terms (one yr) of handling this then bbye lol

2.) I found new love! Art is so beautiful and I can’t wait to explore more of it as time gets by! :D <3

3.) I still dont know what I have to do when I finish college. Let the wind take me to the right place pls! lol

As I make this post I actually have two quizzes and two papers due this week but look at how unbothered I am and right now I am here in Tumblr :D lol anyway, good night. still have to wake up at 4:30am tomr cos back to school again. :((( see i’m just dragging myself to school :(( <//3 lololol

19.3.18 | 22:09 | home