#i think honestly the thing that makes me ??? with ted lasso is how we have 1 black british accent in like the entire show

[chaoswillcalmusdown]

thought to myself "the ted lasso team can't be tHAt white???" as i was watching sheffield vs man city and then i went to google the team.

the amount of black players on the team vs the screentime black players get............... they have a black coach ?! i'm not paying loads of attention but like ???

[illiterateaffairs]

DISTRACTIONS XI | SOMEONE TO STAY

pairing: jamie tartt x f!reader (ted lasso)

rating: T

word count: 6,369

summary: ted has some news to share with the team that unexpectedly leads to other secrets coming out. 

A/N: here it is - the penultimate chapter of distractions! i’ve had the events of this chapter planned out for what feels like forever, and i finally get to share it with you all. thank you for reading and i can’t wait to see what you think💙💛

distractions masterlist | previous chapter

It should come as no surprise that you and Jamie end your night after the Man City win doing some…not-so-innocent activities to celebrate. You’re hesitant at first, not wanting to agitate Jamie’s ankle, but your attentiveness only turns him on more. You’re not entirely sure what time you actually fall asleep, but in the early morning light, you’re awoken by Jamie leaving a trail of kisses on your face and down to your neck, and before you know it, you’re going another two rounds. 

You bask in the afterglow side by side as you catch your breath. When you look at Jamie, there’s a dopey smile on his face.

“You happy or something?” you ask teasingly and his smile only widens.

“Just a little,” he murmurs, leaning over to give you another kiss.

You lay on your sides facing each other for a few quiet moments, as you trace the tattoos on his arm. 

“Have I mentioned how much I like your tattoos?” you whisper. 

“Mm-mm,” Jamie shakes his head.

“Well, I do.”

“Have you ever thought about getting one?”

“A couple times, but not seriously,” you tell him, “Not sure what I’d get.”

“I think you should get a big number 9 plastered across your back,” he suggests with a faux-serious expression.

You snort, “And why would I do that?”

He shrugs innocently, “So you can have a piece of your favorite footballer wherever you go.”

“That’s funny because you and I both know my favorite footballer is…”

“I swear to God if you get the number 24 tattooed anywhere on your body, I’ll scream.”

You laugh out loud, placating your boyfriend with another kiss. “I think I’ll have to keep thinking of other tattoo ideas before I commit to anything officially.”

“Fine,” Jamie agrees.

You move your fingers up the length of his arm to run gently across his face, “With everything that happened last night, I never got the chance to ask you about your dad. Was he at the game?”

Jamie looks down, but covers your hand with his, “No, he wasn’t. Which I think honestly messed with me more. I ended up texting him afterwards, but I haven’t heard back yet.”

“I’m sorry, Jamie,” you whisper, knowing their relationship was complicated, but that he still begrudgingly cared about the man, “I think reaching out could be good. You don’t have to forgive him, but you deserve a little closure.”

Jamie nods, “Yeah. Ted said something like that, too.”

You smile internally. Of course he did. 

Jamie lifts his head to glance at the clock on your side of the bed, “I think we overslept.”

You roll your eyes light heartedly, “Yeah, I wonder why.”

Jamie smirks giving you yet another kiss, “We should get ready. Can I drive you to the club today?”

Your heart flutters at how excited he seems to publicly take you to work for the first time. Unfortunately, you had a few loose ends to tie up this morning, so you’d be going to the club later this afternoon, getting the all clear from Rebecca over text on your way home last night. 

“I’ll actually be in a little later today. I have some things I need to do first,” you’re attuned to the way Jamie’s face falls, so you quickly reach out to stroke his cheek again, “I promise there’s nothing to worry about. I want to tell you everything. I was thinking over dinner tonight? I can make my lasagna that you like so much.”

Jamie’s expression relaxes, though you can tell he’s still a bit weary of what exactly you’ll be telling him. Still, he gives you a tiny smile, “That sounds great, babe.”

“Good. Now hurry up and get ready. Don’t want Roy to yell at you.” 

Jamie groans, but reluctantly pushes himself out of bed. You eventually manage to get up yourself once he’s ready, pulling on one of his tee-shirts so you can kiss him goodbye at the door. 

Once he’s gone, you take a deep breath. Despite your indecision about your job situation, spending the night carrying on with Jamie, Keeley, and Roy made what you wanted to do become clear as day. You weren’t sure how everyone would react, especially with the trouble Keeley and Rebecca had gone through, but you knew in your heart you had to follow your dreams on your own terms. And that’s exactly what you were going to start doing this morning.

Jamie arrives at Nelson Road with a sense of self assurance he’s never had before. Sure, he’s always had an air of confidence and cockiness about him his entire life, but today Jamie feels a special sense of pride when he enters the locker room. Not only had he helped his team win a game in his home city the night before, he was dating the most incredible girl he has ever met and now everyone knew it. 

As if they didn’t hype him up enough about it the night before, his teammates greet him with pats on the back and teasing remarks about the match, and about you. Jamie rolls his eyes, joking right along with them, but on the inside he’s admittedly enjoying the praise. He knows the team loves you, and is very protective of you. And while he knows they’ve grown to love him too since returning to Richmond, it warms his heart that they not only approve of his relationship with you, but are almost as excited about it as he is. Almost. He was definitely the most excited.

The Greyhounds go about their morning, getting ready for training, and the spirit continues to be high. For whatever reason, though, Jamie senses a shift in the mood when the coaches enter the locker room. They’re probably going to want to get serious about their final game of the season, he assumes, but another piece of him worries that something else is going on.

“Hey, everyone listen up,” Ted calls out and he’s missing the usual pep in his voice, “I’ve got something I want to say to you all before training.”

The team instantly stops whatever they’re doing to give their coach their full attention. Ted exchanges a look with Coach Beard who nods reassuringly. Roy and Trent stand off to the side, seemingly in the loop as well, and they don’t look thrilled about whatever it is. 

When Ted turns back to face the team, he’s scratching his face nervously, but he takes a deep breath and continues, “There’s been a lot going on in my life lately, mentally, as you may know. And while I’ve been handling things better, there’s still one thing I can’t fix here, and that’s my relationship with my kid. He hasn’t said anything himself, but I know I’m not present enough in his life. So, that’s why I decided after our season’s over, I’m going to go back to Kansas. Permanently. So...this will be my last week as your coach.”

It takes everyone in the room a second to process this, but when reality hits them, there’s an uproar of confusion, sadness, and frustration. It's unclear what each of them say, as they talk over one another, but most are just trying to tell Ted to stay in their own way. 

Ted nods his head, letting them get it all out, before raising his hand to calm them down. “Hey, hey, hey. I know it’s sudden, but trust me I didn’t think this through lightly. Coaching you guys the last few years has been one of the greatest honors and privileges of my life. But now I need some time to focus on my family and I hope you all will come to understand that.”

Silence blankets the room again, before another chorus of murmurs echo their understanding, though the mood in the room is still solemn. For Jamie’s part, he’s mostly remained silent from his seat on the bench, too shell-shocked by the news to say or do anything. He understood that Ted was leaving, but the actuality of it wasn’t hitting him completely yet. Probably because he didn’t want to let himself believe it, with how important Ted was to him, even if he didn’t always acknowledge that. 

“So, who’s gonna be our coach next year?” Dani asks, and few teammates tack on ‘yeahs’ in equal curiosity. 

Jamie notices Ted’s eyes briefly flit to Roy, but the assistant coach just continues starting straight ahead with his arms crossed.

“Uh, I’m not sure yet. Think that’s up to Rebecca, but I just told her the news this morning,” Ted answers honestly. 

“Coach Beard, are you leaving, too?” Colin questions this time.

Everyone’s heads whip to the man in question at the front of the room next to Ted.

Slowly Beard nods his head, “Yeah. I’m leaving, too.”

Another round of depressed groans carries through the locker room as the team processes a second loss.

“Wait, what about Y/N?” Sam brings up before he can even stop himself, but as soon as he sees the alarmed look on his coaches faces, he realizes his mistake. “Shit.”

The team grows quiet again, their heads turning to Sam this time, and Jamie’s heart skips a beat at the sound of your name.

“Uh, what does Y/N have to do with this?” Isaac questions.

“Yeah, just because she’s American doesn’t automatically mean she’s leaving, too.” Jan Maas adds on.

While Jamie’s equally confused, his heart continues to pound against his chest. With furrowed brows, he looks between a guilt-ridden Sam, and Beard and Ted, who exchange looks of their own. An uneasy feeling forms in the pit of his stomach, as he and the rest of his teammates wait for an explanation.

A nervous Ted clears his throat, nodding again, “I think what Sam is referring to is that...Y/N is actually my niece.” To the chorus of gasps, Ted continues, “Yeah. She didn’t want you fellas to know, so you didn’t think she got her job because we were related.”

Jamie’s heart drops. So many things become clear in that moment; why it felt like you’d been keeping something from him, how you’d become so close to Ted in a short period of time, why you were so good with Henry when he visited. You’ve known him your whole life. He can barely hear Ted continue as he processes all of this. 

“I’m sure this isn’t how she pictured you all finding out. But either way, me leaving doesn’t necessarily mean she’ll want to go as well,” he tells everyone.

However, no one has time to feel relief when a small voice pipes up.

“But what about that job she’s interviewing for?” Will asks from the back of the room, drawing everyone’s attention to him. Suddenly nervous with everyone’s eyes on him, he carries on with a stutter, “I-I heard her talking to Sam in the boot room about it one day. She’s interviewing for a writing job in New York.”

Once again, everyone’s heads sharply turn to Sam, who looks apologetically at Jamie across the room. That’s when it sinks in for everyone. You in fact could be leaving them too. 

Jamie can barely hold eye contact with Sam, turning his attention to his shoes. His breathing goes heavy, and he barely makes out Coach Beard ordering everyone to start heading towards the pitch for training. Sam is the last one to file out besides Jamie. He wants to apologize to his friend, for helping keep your secret, and letting Jamie find out this way, but he doesn’t know what to say to make him feel better. So, he just defeatedly follows the rest of his team out of the locker room doors.

Jamie’s not sure how much time passes when a hand on his shoulder brings him back to reality.

“Hey, Jamie,” Ted’s soothing voice says to him, “Want to chat in my office for a sec?”

Jamie nods absent-mindedly, rubbing his face before following behind his coach. He passes Roy who only gives him a pat on the back before leaving with Beard and Trent. 

Ted shuts the door behind Jamie, before rounding his desk to sit in his office chair. Jamie fidgets for a few seconds before leaning against the shelf near the door. 

After it's clear Jamie’s not going to start this conversation, Ted speaks up again himself, “Well, first off I want to say I’m sorry that you found out about everything this way. I’m sure she wanted to tell you all of that herself, and I’m sure Sam didn’t mean for it to come out that way either.” 

Jamie nods, still not looking at Ted. Internally, he laughs bitterly. You were probably going to tell him all of this tonight; feed him a nice meal just to break his heart.

“If it’s any consolation, this is the first time I’m hearing about this job in New York, too,” Ted adds, “So it has nothing to do with my decision to go back to the states, if that’s really something she’s considering. In fact, I haven’t had the chance to tell her my news either.”

“So, she’s really your niece?” Jamie finally says. He definitely knows it's the truth, but he’s still in disbelief that it's been right under his nose the whole time. 

“Sort of,” Ted snorts, “Her dad is Michelle’s brother. So, in a way she’s not technically my niece any more. But she’s still my family in the way that matters.” 

Jamie nods again. A piece of him is touched by the way Ted has clearly been looking out for you the last few months; especially after your breakup. But another part of him is horrified that he’s been sneaking around with a relative of Ted’s this whole time. 

It’s as if Ted can sense his uneasiness as he speaks again, “I’m really happy for you two by the way.”

“Really?” Jamie asks, making eye contact with him for the first time.

“Really, really,” Ted nods, with a kind smile on his face, his head resting in his hand, “I think it’s great. I mean, I just found out yesterday, but she is clearly very smitten with you.”

Jamie’s cheek’s flush and he prays Ted doesn’t notice. “You’re not going to threaten me or tell me I’m not good enough for her?”

“Nah, that’s more of a dad’s job; and she’s got two so I’m sure you’ll hear that speech plenty,” Ted teases, “But I also know you, Jamie. I’ve seen you come into yourself the last few years, and that person is a good guy. Getting to see your growth has been one of the best parts of coaching this team, and one of the things I’ll miss the most. I don’t need to tell you not to hurt her, because I know you won’t. Besides, I can see that you’re just as smitten with her, if not more.”

If Jamie wasn’t blushing before, he definitely was now. Not only because of his comment about his feelings for you, but also due to Ted complimenting him. He was once again overcome with sadness thinking about Ted not being around anymore, but he couldn’t handle that thought right now. And he certainly couldn’t handle thinking about how he’d feel if you were leaving, too.

Unsure of what else to say, Jamie just settles on a simple thank you. 

Ted gives him another supportive smile. “Don’t mention it. Just go easy on her about this whole job thing. She’s probably confused by it all, and she might not even go. Just talk to her about it, okay?”

Jamie nods, managing a tiny smile of his own. “Coach?” he asks softly, “Would it be okay if I skip training today? Think I need to clear my head. Might end up going for a run on my own anyway.”

Ted nods assuringly, “Of course.”

As Jamie stands up and heads for the door, he turns to Ted one last time. “Coach?”

Ted looks at him curiously.

“Thank you. For everything you’ve done for me the last three years. I think it really sucks that you’re leaving, but I understand why. You’ve got to do what’s best for you and your family, and I’m sure your son will be glad to have you back around. I know the rest of the team’s bummed, but they’ll probably be over it by tomorrow and support you, too.”

This time Ted is the one overcome with emotion, knowing it's rare to get this much sentiment from Jamie Tartt. Trying not to show it, Ted just nods and gives him another smile. “Thank you, Jamie.”

With one last tight smile, Jamie pulls open Ted’s office door and disappears around the corner.

Your plan to have a productive morning was very successful. After treating yourself to a big, homemade breakfast, you hunkered down at a local café to get some things done regarding the job options you had. In effort to not get distracted, you turned your phone on ‘do no disturb’ and then spent a few hours drafting emails, tightening up your manuscript, and preparing what you were going to say to Jamie later in the day. 

After feeling satisfied with your work, you close your laptop and decide you have a bit of time before you need to be at the club, so you plan to go to the grocery store to get everything you need for dinner with Jamie. However, when you open your phone to type out a list, you see dozens of missed calls and texts.

Your first instinct is that someone had to have died. But that was ridiculous. Still, your nerves are spiking as you check your texts. There were a slew of them from various members of the team, and even Roy and Trent Crimm. In some shape or form, they were all asking about your relation to Ted, whether or not you were leaving Richmond, and if you were taking that job in New York. 

You feel like you’re going to be sick. How the fuck did they know all of that?

You get your answer when you finally listen to the one lone voicemail you had. It was from Sam.

“Hi, I can’t talk long, I’m meant to be at training, but I need to tell you that I fucked up and I’m sorry. The team knows about you being related to Ted. And about the New York job. It all just came out and I can explain more later, but I just need you to know that I’m so, so sorry. And I’m sorry if it hurt Jamie, but I know you two will work it out. Okay, I gotta go. Beard and Roy are coming. I’m sorry again. Okay, bye.”

There’s not an ounce of you that can be mad at Sam, especially with how distraught he sounds. And shit. Jamie. The one person that didn’t reach out. You can’t imagine what he’s thinking right now.

Running out of the café, you furiously navigate your phone to order an Uber to the club, furiously cursing yourself for not being able to drive on the left side of the road. Stupid England. 

Once you arrive, you race through the halls to the locker room. It's about time for lunch, and you count your blessings that most of the team must have already left the premises to eat. Among the few stragglers is Sam, who is anxiously sitting on the bench staring at his phone. His head shoots up when you enter, causing him to stand with wide eyes, meeting you halfway.

“Oh, my God, Y/N, I am so sorry, I completely messed everything up,” he begins, desperate to fix it all.

You shake your head as aggressively as you can, “You do not need to apologize to me. It’s okay. I just need to find Jamie, is he here?”

Sam frowns, “No. He didn’t end up training with us today, and no one’s heard from him since this morning.”

“Shit,” you sigh, rubbing your hands over your face. You rack your brain for where Jamie could have possibly gone, but one thing still isn’t making sense to you. Dropping your hands, you return your gaze to your best friend.

“Sam, why did this all happen?”

Sam’s shoulders sag, his expression unreadable. His eyes eventually leave yours to look at something over your shoulder. The sound of someone clearing their throat makes you spin around to see Ted standing in the doorway to the coaches’ offices. He nods his head for you to join him.

Glancing back at Sam one more time, he gives you a small smile and squeezes your shoulder. He apologizes one last time, to which you assure him  that everything is okay. But you were finding it hard to believe that yourself. 

Ted shuts the office door behind you and you dramatically fall into Beard’s chair as Ted sits in his own. 

You don’t bother beating around the bush, “What the hell is going on? I don’t come to work once and Sam ends up spilling the beans on everything. Did something happen?”

Your uncle gives you a sympathetic smile, “Yeah. I spilled some beans of my own.” At your confused expression, Ted plows forward, “I’m going back to Kansas.”

“For the summer?” you ask, though you fear you know the answer.

“No, Kiddo,” he sighs, “After the season’s over, I’m moving back to be closer to Henry. And Beard’s going back, too.”

“Oh,” you nod in understanding, but still find it hard to process, “When did you make that decision?”

“This morning, after my mom left,” he admits sheepishly, “But I’ve been thinking about it for a while.”

You sit across from him in silence, taking it all in. The only reason you were here in the first place was because of Ted. What were you supposed to do now?

“The team didn’t exactly take it well,” Ted explains, “And in the midst of the chaos, Sam asked what me leaving meant for you. Everything sort of snowballed after that.

You inhale deeply, taking it all in. 

“And Jamie?” you ask quietly, “How did he take it?”

“I think he was just caught off guard and trying to figure out how to process it all,” Ted tells you, “He was surprised about the family thing. And the whole job in New York thing.” 

“Jesus, he’s probably pissed at me again,” you groan, “I was literally going to tell him everything tonight. I just needed a few more hours.”

Ted’s lips quirk up, “That’s life, Kiddo. It doesn’t always go exactly how we’d like it to.”

You scoff, “Yeah well life is stupid.”

“Yeah, it can be,” Ted chuckles, “I think it sounds great; a writing job in New York. That’s what you’ve always wanted, right? To write and live in the Big Apple?”

“Yeah. It was,” you say quietly, “But I wasn’t sure if that's what I wanted still, so I was trying to figure it out before I told Jamie. Or anyone.”

“Hey, that’s fair,” Ted nods supportively, “If you want my humble opinion, I think it’s great if you want to go for it in New York. I also think it’s great if you decide to stay here and continue to figure things out. Heck, it would even be great if you wanted to come back to Kansas, too. But Kiddo, you have to make that decision, whatever it may be, on behalf of yourself. Not for me, not for Jamie, not for anyone else. Just for you.”

Ted’s words settle in the air and you take it all in. While you were already pretty dead set on what you were going to do, you definitely agreed with his sentiment. You had to follow your own gut for once, not anyone else’s.

“You’re right,” you eventually say softly, “I think I know what I’m going to do, but I think I owe it to Jamie to finally have him be the first to know.”

Ted gives you a supportive smile, and your stomach flips.

“So, you’re really leaving?”

Ted nods solemnly, “I’m really leaving.”

“Then who the hell is going to make ridiculous puns around here to annoy Roy?”

This makes Ted snort, “I don’t know. I’m hoping I’ve rubbed off on enough of them, that they’ll carry on the tradition.”

You laugh along with him. You wonder if Ted will ever fully understand the impact he’s had here. On the club, on the team, and even on you these past months. You have a feeling even if he did, it wouldn’t be enough to change his mind. 

You spend the next few hours trying to track down Jamie, hoping the sooner you could find him and explain things, the less damage would accrue. 

However, he wasn’t answering your calls or texts, and no one seems to know where he is. You fear, even after your promises to communicate with each other after your last falling out, Jamie had once again resorted to pushing you completely away.

Lucky for you, Keeley happened to pop by the club that afternoon, and after getting caught up on the drama, insisted on driving you to Jamie’s to see if he’s there. Unfortunately, after searching every nook and cranny of his lavish home, you resign to the fact that he’s not there. You feel defeated as you resituate yourself in Keeley’s passenger seat, unsure of what to do next. She offers to drive you around Richmond, suggesting that Jamie could be blowing off steam, running somewhere, and maybe you’d pass him. You take up her offer, less so because you hoped to catch a glimpse of him, and more so to avoid going home to any empty home for a little while longer. 

It was nearly 6PM by the time Keeley drops you off at your flat. Suffice it to say, you didn’t find Jamie jogging around Richmond. You also didn’t find him wallowing in Crown and Anchor, but that didn’t stop you and Keeley from doing so yourself over a quick pint before calling off your search for the night. As she drove you home, you briefly wondered if Jamie could have possibly fled back to Manchester, to see his mom again. But that was four hours away, and there was no chance you were asking Keeley, or anyone for that matter, to make that drive. And the Uber fare would be atrocious. 

As you climb your apartment stairs, you resign to a night of waiting by your phone, hoping to hear from him, and if not, trying to find him again tomorrow. 

When you walk into your home, you’re instantly overcome with the feeling that you’re not alone. You’re proven right when, as you’re discarding your coat and shoes, Jamie enters the living room from your kitchen. 

“Hi,” you breathe out, after getting over the shock of seeing him, “Have you been here the whole time?”

Jamie shrugs, “I went on a run for a bit. But eventually I got the urge to come here.”

You nod, still on edge, “You, uh, didn’t think to answer any of my calls or texts?”

Jamie cringes, “So, I’m pretty sure I left my phone in my bag in the locker room.”

You scoff in disbelief, “Jamie…”

“I know. I know. That was stupid. But I left the club in such a hurry, I wasn’t thinking.”

“I was worried sick all day, I thought you were shutting me out again,” you whimper tiredly, unable to stop yourself from giving into the emotion that built up all day.

“Shit,” Jamie mutters, taking large steps to close the gap between the two of you to gather you in his arms, “I’m sorry.”

You allow yourself to feel comforted by his embrace for a few seconds before you’re shoving him away abruptly, “Fuck! I shouldn’t be making you apologize to me, when I’m the one who lied to you and hurt you. Again!” 

You cover your face with your hands, frustrated at yourself for making Jamie feel even an ounce of guilt, when you were once again in this situation because of you.

Gently, Jamie pries your hands from your face and interlocks your fingers together. “Hey, it’s okay.”

“It’s not, though! I keep messing things up between us because I don’t know how to communicate like a normal human being. And you don’t deserve to be jerked around like this. But I promise, I can explain everything if you give me the chance.”

Jamie swallows, taking in your words, though a tiny smile plays at his mouth. “I promise I will give you the chance, but is it okay if I say some things first?”

You hesitate, your eyebrows furrowing over what he could possibly have to say, but eventually you nod. 

“Thank you,” Jamie whispers, giving your hands another squeeze and then he takes a deep breath, “You’ve been spending a lot of time lately reassuring me that I’m good enough, but I feel like I haven’t done enough to assure you that you are more than enough for me. Yeah, it has sucked to feel like you were keeping stuff from me. I knew you couldn’t have been doing anything wrong, but it still hurt that you either didn’t want me to know or trust me enough to let me in. But now I understand that it has nothing to do with me. I get that letting people in is hard and that you were afraid that the secrets you were keeping would make things harder. Sure, it would have been nice to know you were related to Ted from the get-go. I might have not tried so hard to sleep with my coach's niece the first chance I got.”

You manage a small laugh.

“Obviously, I don’t regret that though. And I get why you did it. I get that it might have made your job more complicated, and then even more so once we got together. Telling family is a big step. So, I get it, I do.

“I even get why you didn’t tell me about the job in New York. The thought of you leaving…I can’t even think about it too much. But I also know that it's your dream. And the last time you told a guy you wanted to go after your dream, he discouraged you. And even though I would never do that, I know deep down that still scares you. But I want you to know that I think it's amazing; that you’re writing again, and that you have the opportunity to do it in the city you’ve always wanted to live in. I’m so proud of you, and want you to be where you need to be. Even if it's not here with me. So, that's why, as much as it kills me to say, I think you should do it. You should take the job in New York.”

Jamie’s words weigh heavily on you. Firstly, you’re heartened by his reassurance that you were more than enough for him. You didn’t realize how much you needed to hear that. Secondly, you were simultaneously surprised and not surprised that he was encouraging you to pursue the New York job. It wasn’t a direction you had been expecting this inevitable conversation to take, but it was Jamie you were talking about. Of course he’d say exactly the right thing and support you, even if it meant you moving back to another continent.

Overcome with complete adoration for him, and since words are failing you at the moment, you can’t help but to plant a gentle kiss on his lips. As you pull away, Jamie is clearly surprised by the act of affection, but he’s also not complaining. He looks at you expectantly, hoping you do eventually have something to say in response to his speech. And you do. You just need to figure out how to word it best. 

You eventually inhale your own shaky breath, meeting his eyes once again, “Thank you, for saying all of that. It means a lot to me. Even if you say you understand, I’m still sorry for keeping everything from you, especially now that it has come out this way. It really all stemmed from not wanting to mess anything up between us, but of course the opposite still happened.

“I’ve been dying to tell you about Ted for so long, but like you said, telling family is a lot, and Ted’s an important part of your life too, so I didn’t want to make things weird between you two. 

“And the job…I knew you’d be excited for me. But I think I just never wanted to see the look on your face when you heard it was in New York. And then things got more complicated when Keeley told me she knew a literary agent, here in the U.K. who might be interested in meeting with me.”

“Oh?” Jamie’s eyebrows shoot up in hopeful curiosity.

“Yeah. So, as you may have guessed, I needed some time to sort out what I wanted to do and where I wanted to go.”

“And,” Jamie asks timidly, “Have you decided?”

After a few beats, you nod. “Yeah. I decided I can’t work for that agency here.” Jamie’s face falls and you’re quick to latch back onto his hand, “But I also can’t take the job in New York either.”

Jamie stares at you in total confusion, “What?”

You smile slightly, finding his expression oddly adorable. “I want to write more than anything, and part of me is happy doing it by any means necessary, but I also hate the idea of not being able to prove myself on my own. Back in Chicago, Mason got me the job at the advertising firm. Then, when I got tired of that, Ted and Rebecca got me the job for Richmond. My friend from Chicago got me an interview in New York, and Keeley knows a literary agent here. Everything I’ve done has been because some else suggested it or did it for me. I’m not naive enough to know that sometimes connections are how people get work these days, but I don’t want that to be my story. I want to succeed because I did it on my own. 

“So, this morning, I told the publisher in New York I was no longer interested in interviewing for the reading position, and then spent hours refining my manuscript and submitting it to a few small, independent publishing houses to see if any of them would be interested in working with me. I know it won’t be as lavish as the publishing houses in New York or the one Keeley had connections to. But all writers start from somewhere, and I want to start somewhere on my terms.”

Jamie digests everything you said, and eventually gives you a shaky smile, “And where are these publishers you submitted to?”

You give Jamie your own shy smile, “Right here, in England.” Jamie’s grin widens as you continue, “I’ve never felt more at home, than I have here. And with the exception of my own family, I’ve never been surrounded by more people who genuinely care about me. I feel more like myself than I ever have before and I’m not really keen on losing any of that.” You bite your lip, “And I also sorta really like a certain footballer that lives here, too. So that’s kinda the cherry on top of it all.”

Jamie lets out a disbelieving laugh, “So, you’re staying?”

“Yeah,” you nod, “Is that okay?”

Instead of answering, Jamie places both his hands on either side of your face and kisses you with as much passion as he can muster. You don’t hesitate to reciprocate, sliding your hands up his stomach to rest on his chest. You knew better now than to make a decision on behalf of a man, but god, were you glad that you got to keep doing this for the foreseeable future. 

When Jamie pulls away from you a few moments later, his eyes are watery, “I know I said I was okay with you going to New York - and I meant that - but, God, I’m glad you’re not.”

You giggle, “I’m pretty happy with my decision, too.”

Jamie leans in to kiss you again, but you lean back with your nose scrunched up. Your brain is less clouded by emotions now, and you finally pick up on the aroma flooding your home.

“Are you cooking something?”

Jamie smiles awkwardly, his face flushed, “Yeah, so during my run, I had this grand idea to surprise you with dinner like you usually do for me. So I grabbed what I could from the store and attempted to make your lasagna recipe. It’s probably nowhere near as good as yours is, and the garlic bread is store bought, but that shit still tastes fucking good, if I do say myself.”

You can’t keep the bright smile off your face, “I’m sure it’ll be amazing.”

Jamie squints, “Yeahhh, maybe wait to try it first before you give me too much credit.”

You giggle and shake your head, before pulling Jamie in for a warm hug, which he accepts without protest.

You couldn’t care less how the food was going to taste. It could be burned to a crisp and you still knew it would be the best meal of your life. Because Jamie, your Jamie, took the time to make it to make you happy. And push you towards a decision that he thought would be what you wanted, even if it hurt him. 

You were so lucky to have him, and you were comforted by the fact that he seemed pleased to have you as well. And now there were no more secrets between you threatening to unravel everything. Jamie wasn’t going to disappear on you again, and you certainly weren’t going anywhere either. Richmond was your dream home now, and the fact that your person lived here too was the best kind of bonus.

A/N: THERE IT ISSSS CANT WAIT TO HEAR EVERYONE’S REACTIONS! ALSO, was anyone else bummed we didn’t see the team’s reaction to Ted leaving in the show when they first heard? i’ve had the scene in my head as the ted reveal since i thought of this story between season 3 even came out because i knew they’d take ted away from us and i was shook we didn’t get a reveal. i get why and part of me appreciates them not focusing on the sad, but i really took away from my story haha

Taglist: @atabigail @escapismqueen @boundtomyfate @sammysgirl1997 @shephard17895 @lil-tracys @alaspice @itsbarbraann @redpool @drmeghanjones @straightforwardly @alex-sulli @aiyaiy @artemismaximoff @roadtoself-love @theloud-yet-quietone @forcesofgrief @kirisimpster @geek-and-proud @grippleback-galaxy @lalla-04p @gabbycoady13 @royalestrellas @qardasngan @creationcitystreet-em @percysaidnever @emily-b @mrfitzsimmons @k-n-e @agentstarkid @legobatmans9thab @mrsprongs25 @sokkigarden @for-fuck-sake-im-alive @dollfaceyourfear @dicgohargreeves @heyitz-julia @vampirodelascajas @grxcesmind @lizziel1410 @a-sweet-little-fangirl @bcon24 @looooooooomis @queen-of-dumbasses @moseyluvs @alipap3 @amachira @respondingtoshowerthoughts-blog @daphneblakeswife @chelseamount @k0z3me @lickitandsendit3 @miakat9​ @shimmeringfrenchie @meg-ro @selmasemlan @hellfire-babez @rockchickrebel @katdahlali @taytaylala12 @lemonpiegurll @pri00r @brianandthemays @afraidofshrimp @curlypeter @sonyume @rexorangecouny @thewildestwonderland @duvetsandpillows  @cyphah @buckybarnex @eviemae263782 @piper570 @ibong-adarnaaa @spookysins @optimisticsandwichgladiator @marveltg365 @ringpopdust @gcidrvsh @beardsplitter @scaramou it wouldn’t let me tag the last few of you, let me know if its something with your settings, otherwise i can keep trying in future updates! <3      

[sylvies-chen]

ok TED LASSO EPISODE 2 THOUGHTS:

keeley wanting to take a blood oath with her coworkers on ayahuasca is so funny like these writers really understand girl culture 😌

dani is the unsung hero of this episode because his lines have such an innocence to them even as he’s telling trent to fuck off which honestly takes talent to portray with such naïveté so kudos to cristo for that!

THE TEAM BEING UPSET EVEN BY THE RUMOUR OF ROY AND KEELEY BREAKING UP hands down the funniest and most amazing scene of the episode like they all know roykeeley are precious and the king and queen must be protected at all costs i love those himbos 🥰

trent is doing his best and honestly we love him for it. I mean look at that face, what’s not to love?

I do think his book will cause some ground to rumble at richmond though. rebecca and keeley and higgins were right in nodding vigorously at ted because it will not be good if it blows up

also rebecca saying yes while seeing a bunch of no gestures just after ted did the same thint mhm yeah soulmates I do believe

roy is being his usual self this episode and you can so clearly see how his mindset with his career last season set the tone for his mindset in his relationship with keeley which led him to break up with her. he’s being stupid because hello, she’s keeley fucking jones, he needs to get over the insecurity, but I also get how his it’s valid as he’s felt it in so many aspects of his life before. him holding onto the news clipping is proof of that. the whole “some people would rather quit than get fired” thing just is so layered with him dumping her out of fear that he would end up dumped one day and have his insecurities about not being good enough for her confirmed. this also means he’s growing and will get over it though, trust in endgame everyone !!

zava is more of a diva then jamie was in season 1 and it is going to be a BLAST watching jamie perhaps revert back to his old self just a *little* bit out of jealousy and watch these two have one big ol’ diva-off (in my head it plays out like a “lip sync battle for your life” on rupaul’s drag race kind of moment but that’s just me)

THE PUB BESTIES ARE BACK OMG

jamie trying to hug roy and roy shoving him away cause he was freaked out was absolutely hilarious like it’s giving fleabag when claire tried to hug her (if anyone hasn’t seen fleabag pls go watch it on amazon prime)

Rupert Mannion is a slimy turd and I hope Rebecca murders him in a violent and unspeakable manner and then gets away with it

also Rebeca yelling at Zava in the bathrooms paralleling when she told Keeley that men give each other jobs in bathrooms all the time!!! Haha!

give me a ten hour episode of Jason Sudeikis as Ted Lasso batting his eyelashes and making comments about Hallmark Christmas movies and I will be a happy woman

BONUS: the amsterdam snowglobe!!! THEY KEEP TEASING THIS TRIP AND GOOD LORD IT IS GOING TO KILL ME!!!

[hopefulromances]

Long Time Coming I Chapter Nine I Electric Love

Summary: Being hired as the first female assistant coach in the league was a challenge of it itself. Being a football protigy and University Football Legend was easy enough. Coaching Jamie Tartt was a challenge all on its own.

Word Count: 2.9k

Warning: Some angst

A/N: Enjoy

Prologue One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight

Jamie gave me some space, for which I was grateful. We had our final match coming up and our dreams of promotion were just in sight. I wanted to be able to focus on what that, the match, which was the most important thing I’d be a part of. But of course, there was only one thing on my mind, and it was Jamie. Without having Jamie around to talk to, I found myself missing him more and more.

I moped my way through the day. Coming to work, going to my desk, going to the pitch, eating a plain salad, and going home. I didn’t want to let it affect my work so when I was on the pitch I tried to stay as unbiased as possible. But honestly, I felt more inadequate than ever. It didn’t help that the media seemed to be shining a light on every mistake you’d ever made in the league.

 “Look, all I’m saying is that she’s too much of an amateur to be on the team,” George Cartrick stated firmly on the Soccer Saturday show. “A woman cannot teach a man.”

“Now, George!” Jeff Stelling defended. “(Y/N) (L/N) has performed admirably under Lasso’s leadership.”

“She’s barely out the womb! What makes her think she’s qualified to be in the Premiere League?” George shot back. “She needs to pack her bags and get out of Richmond before she loses them a chance at promotion.”

I turned my phone off, running a hand through my hair in frustration. Maybe he was right. Maybe I wasn’t ready for this job.

            “George Cartrick is a twat with shriveled balls.” Roy’s voice entered from his side room. “And I should know, he constantly wears pants that show them off.”

I glanced up at him, stuffing my phone in my pocket. “Yeah, thanks, Roy.”

            “Hey, Roy’s right,” Ted agreed. “With the sentiment, I’ve never seen George’s testicles myself.”

I rolled my eyes and rested my head on the desk. I appreciated their sentiment I really did but I was just so BLAH at the moment that nothing they seemed to say or do really help. I was in a funk. A funk I had put myself into. Ted, Roy and Beard exchanged glances with each other.

            “You know, (Y/N),” Ted said, turning to face you. “You can talk to us about anything. Honorary Diamond Dog meeting.”

I peeked out of my arms to look around the room. Nate wasn’t in the room, so I didn’t have to worry about his sorry ass judging my for my pitiful nature. I lifted my head and took a deep inhale.

            “I’m putting space between me and someone I really care about, and I thought it would make me feel better but instead its hurting me more than anything has ever hurt me before.” It all came out in a fast stream of consciousness, not breathing until I got the statement out.

            “Wait, if this is someone you cared about, why are you putting space between you and them.” Beard questioned, finally joining the conversation. You pursed your lips, trying to figure out how to tread this line. There was no way in hell you were telling this group of people about Jamie.

            “Well, um, I was afraid my feelings were getting in the way… and he didn’t care about me the same way I cared about him.” I decided to say. “I thought that I needed to give myself time to get over him.” Beard opened his mouth to say something, but I didn’t let him say anything. “But instead of getting over him, it’s making me want him even more. And I’m trying to focus on the game but everyone and their mom is expecting me to fail! And all I want is to talk to this person because I know they would support me but now I’m afraid to even talk to him!”

Ted raised his eyebrows and let out an impressed whistle. “You got all that cooped up in that head of yours?” I nodded. “Well, no reason you’re in a funk. Look, (Y/N), I think you need to take a note out of a certain snow queen’s book and ‘Let It Go’.”

            “Frozen, classic,” Roy approved, nodding his head.

            “Wait, wait, wait. Let what go?” I asked, furrowing my eyebrows.

            “Well, it seems to me that you are holding on to every feeling, thought, and possibility,” Ted elaborated. “You hold onto all of that you’re gonna pop!”

You frowned at him. “Weren’t you the one who said that sometimes we should keep things inside?”

            “That was before I met the feeling of letting it go! It really works.”

            “It’s true, letting go is great, that’s how I do it,” Roy agreed.

            “Roy! You’re one of the most private people I know!”

            “I’m private, but I also have a very healthy relationship with my emotions and know who and when to trust people with my sharing,” he pointed out, shrugging.

Dammit I hated when he was right. I blew a raspberry and face planted on the table. I wanted to listen to them, and just let things go, but tomorrow was the big day. Maybe it was something I’d worry about later. For now, I’d just focus on the game.

That was my plan at least. But as I was leaving that night, someone pulled me into the boot room. I whipped around to see Jamie looking at me.

            “Jamie what-“

            “Hush, now, last time you got to talk and I didn’t so now you’re gonna listen to me.” He spoke so quickly that you could barely process exactly what he was saying to you.

            “Jamie I-“

“Hush!”

            “But I-“

            “Just listen!” He grabbed me, holding a hand over my mouth. I frown at him but stayed quiet. “I just want to tell you that I was wrong, yeah? I was wrong about everything. I don’t love Keely. I love you.”

My eyes became saucers as I realized what was happening. I knocked his hand away from me, suddenly feeling hurt. He was lying to me. He was giving me his pity. Well, I didn’t want it.

            “Jamie, please stop.” I felt my lip begin to tremble. “You’re being mean.”

            “No, no, no! I mean it!” He insisted, taking me by my shoulders and forcing me to sit down on the bench. He started picking at his fingers as he paced back and forth. “I really do, I was just- I was confused. I had this feeling, like… fluttery stuff in my stomach. And the last time I had that feeling you hated me, and I was with Keely. So… I guess I thought that I was getting that feeling again because of her. But when I told her it didn’t feel right. Then you told me how you felt, and I was so confused.” He finally paused and looked at me. “I know I’m slow, (Y/N), but I get there eventually.”

I opened my mouth to say something, anything, but I really couldn’t think of anything to say. I was still scared that this was all a joke. That somehow, he didn’t actually love you and he was just trying to get you back in his life no matter what. He held up a hand to silence you.

            “You don’t need to say anything, I know you probably don’t believe me, but I mean it.” Gave me a sideways smile, a hint of his normal cocky self coming out. He stalked forward and bent down, so he was eye-level with me, his face just inches away from mine. “And when we win tomorrow and get promoted, I’ll be doin’ it for you, love.”

The pet name fell so easily off his tongue and I felt my cheeks start to heat up under his gaze. His smirk grew as he saw the blush on my cheeks, any semblance of the anxious boy from before was gone. He gave me one last nod, a wink following it before he turned and left. I was left sitting dumbfounded in the boot room.

            “What… the… fuck?” I finally spouted, bringing my hands up to my cheeks.

            “That was something!” Fucking Will. I turned and looked at him, watching curiously as he shined some shoes. “The two of you are cute!”

I stared at him, still reeling from the interaction. At least there was someone else to there to prove that the interaction actually happened. I didn’t know how to feel. Part of me still believed that Jamie was lying as a way to get me to act normal again, and I honestly wouldn’t blame him. But the other part of me felt like I was soaring. Jamie liked me? No, LOVED me! Could this really be happening?

From then on it felt like I was on auto pilot. Leaving the club, getting home, doing my nighttime yoga. It was all like machinery as I figured out exactly how I should feel about everything. Tomorrow, everything would be different. Whether or not we’d be promoted was one thing but what happened with Jamie and me was entirely different.

It seemed like the whole world was on edge the day of the game. Ted was dealing with his personal life being on display, Roy was having the pain of having his feelings hurt, Beard was on the rocks of Jane (again, and Nate was… well he was acting weirder than normal. All we needed to get promoted was a tie, at the least, but Brentford was a formidable challenger.

I stood in the locker room, drawing up the formation on the board. We were running Nate’s new false nine strategy. It was certainly a choice to try a new tactic so late in the season, especially with promotion on the line but the tactic was good. Colin stood with me, chatting with me about his night and the parking ticket he’d gotten for parking half on the curb outside his house.

            “I swear I didn’t even feel the curb when I parked!” He whined, stretching his arms.

            “Colin, you’re a professional footballer,” I pointed out. “Just pay the ticket. And please, for the love of God, if you feel a bump, stop driving forward.”

He rolled his eyes at me glancing over to say hello to Sam as he walked into the room. Even Sam was had something going on. Edwin Akufo was on his ass about making a decision regarding joining his super team or whatever. I gave him a heartfelt smile which he returned. We all had chips on our shoulders, and this game would prove exactly what we could do with them.

The game did not start well. Brentford scored just twenty minutes into the game. Then again taking us into the half 2-nil. There had to be a solution to this. These guys could play this tactic easily but there was something disconnecting them from the execution of it. Going into the locker room, I could feel the anxiety and disappointment seeping from the lads.

            “I’ma shoot y’all straight. This is bleak, yeah?” Ted started the conversation. “I mean, look at it out there. Looks like a Renaissance painting portraying masculine melancholy.” We looked out into the locker room. It was true, they looked almost angelic in their portrayal of their grief. “Okay, so now what? What are we gonna do?”

            “We should abandon the false nine,” Nate suggested, shaking his head. “It’d work if we had players who knew what the fuck they were doing.”

            “That’s not true, Nate,” I snapped, standing from my seat. Nate glared at me, but I pressed on. “They are perfectly capable of preforming a false nine, they just…” I closed my eyes picture the pitch. “They need to change their perspective.”

            “I agree with (Y/N),” Ted chimed in. “You know, they just had 45 minutes to figure out what not to do. What do you think, Roy?”

            “You should ask them,” Roy offered. “They’re the ones out there actually doing this shit.”

Ted glanced at me then Beard. It was a good idea.

            “Yeah, all right.” We made our way out into the room, gaining the attention of the boys.  “All right, fellas. Coaches and I are are having a little debate and wanna get ya’ll’s take on it. Should we stick with the false nine or switch it up?”

The room was silent as the team thought it over, glancing around das they waited for someone else to speak. It was Jan Maas who stepped up first.

            “The tactic is sound,” he said. “and we’re all perfectly capable of executing it.”

            “Yes, you are,” I encouraged. “The false nine is about deception, playing offense through the guise of defense.” I walked over to the white board where I had drawn up the tactic before the game. “You’re playing too forward, and Brentford sees the moves you make before you make them.” I pointed to the different players. “Fall back, make them come to you, look for the gaps. That’s how you score.”

I turned back around and saw all the eyes on me. I felt a rush of gratitude going through me as I appreciated their sincerity. I deserved to be here, and they knew it. Then my eyes fell on Jamie, who was listening with a soft smile on his face. I felt myself start to smile too.

            “It will work,” Jan Maas agreed.

            “Hey!” Ted interjected. “If Jan Maas says it, you know it’s the truth, right?”

Jamie nodded. But he wasn’t nodding about Jan Maas. He was nodding about the way you had explained the technique to them. As if you were on the field with them, knowing what was going through their minds as they played.

We ended our team meeting with the whole team laying hands on our believe sign. This was it. The moment the team became a family. Going out into the second half, it was like an entirely different team. Before we knew it Sam had scored a miraculous goal and all we needed was one more.

I found myself holding my breath as Jan Maas sent a pass to Jamie. I held my breath as he took control of the ball and started towards the goal. Then a Brentford play was sliding into Jamie’s legs sending him stumbling to the ground. I let out a shout of distain as the crowd cried  to the referee. Then we got it! The referee called a penalty. Jamie hopped up and took the ball.

I knew he could make this goal easily; He hadn’t missed a penalty all season. He turned for a moment to look over at us on the sideline, and his eyes met mine. I could tell he was considering something and was looking at me for something, reassurance?  Whatever he was thinking, I knew he needed to follow his gut, so I gave him a nod. He nodded back to me. Then he did something unexpected. He gave the ball to Dani.

Jamie gave up his chance to be called the savior of Richmond. Because that’s not what he needed to do. In this moment, he needed to get Dani his confidence back.  Gone were the days that Jamie was afraid that Dani would replace him. Instead, he was working with him to allow the team to shine.

In that moment, I decided I didn’t care if the whole world stopped, all I wanted was to be with Jamie.

Which was good because it felt like the whole world did stop as Dani prepared to score. Time stood still as he ran towards the ball, and with one fell swoop Dani scored, tying the game. The stadium erupted into cheers and excitement. We did it, we really did it.

…

The excitement and celebrations of promotion lasted at least an hour as we paraded around the club. The boys found a bar to go to nearby to celebrate the win together. But I had unfinished business here, and I hoped Jamie would find me.

I stood on our pitch, hands in my pockets as I planned out what I was going to say. I was going to tell him that I loved him, too. That I wanted to be with him. That nothing else mattered. But then I saw him, big smile on his face, as he walked towards me in his red vest and ICON hat and everything, everything I planned left my head.

            “Well, what did I say?” He bragged as he walked towards me. “Promoted, eh? How’s it feel to be in the presence of greatness?” I stared at him as he came to stand in front of me. On our pitch. The same pitch I’d chewed him out on just a year ago. He cocked his head at me, raising his eyebrows. “What is it? Why you lookin’ at me like that?”

I grabbed him by his vest and pulled him down to kiss me. He recovered from his surprise in time to grab me by my waist and tugged me closer to him. Electricity shot through me as his lips fit mine just right. How was I supposed to kiss anyone else now that I knew what kissing Jamie was like? It was heated, it was sweet, it was passionate.

It was like fucking lightening.

A/N: To be continued...

Tag List:

@heletsmelovehim @higherthanheroes @ajax-petropolus-wife @oxxolovemelikeyoudooxxo @optimisticsandwichgladiator @kno-way-home @sleepy-time @wigglegiggle @skewedcherries @respondingtoshowerthoughts-blog @snubug @rana030

[wlntrsldler]

hi!! i hope you’re doing well :). can i please request either “and you're telling me you wanna kiss me but we shouldn't cause we're just friends." or “when you found me i was a train wreck” with sam obisanya? i’m not picky either way i just thought they’d both be good and couldn’t decide hehe. thanks!!

kissing in swimming pools | sam obisanya

based on the song kissing in swimming pools by holly humberstone: "when you found me i was a train wreck."

description: the first "i love you" f!reader (she/her)

warnings: language-- it's ted lasso, what did ya expect? fluff! sam in loveeee.

word count: 1356 words

ted lasso requests are open | main masterlist

There were only three things that Sam Obisanya was sure of. 

The first is that his father will be proud of him no matter what he ends up accomplishing in his life. He was sure that if life didn’t pan out the way that it did and he wasn’t a famous footballer, his father would still be as proud as he is of him. He was lucky in that sense– that he had a father who never once made him doubt whether he loved his son or not. Sam knew that he wouldn’t be half the man that he is if his father wasn’t his father. And in his opinion, he thinks he ended up pretty decent. 

The second thing he is sure of is that Ted Lasso was put on this earth to be AFC Richmond’s coach, even if it was just for the short time that he did. Some pretty spectacular people had coached Sam, Roy Kent being one of them, but Ted was something special. Not only did he make Sam a better player on the pitch, he also made him a better man. Whenever he does something wrong, he always repeats the words, “Be a goldfish,” in his head, over and over again. When he’s having a bad day, where everything seems to be going wrong, he closes his eyes and the word “Believe,” on that bright yellow paper is the image in his head. 

The third and final thing Sam Obisanya is sure of is that if he was asked who was the love of his life, he would say you with no hesitation. 

He watched you dance with Keeley to some random 2000s pop song on the dance floor. Beard and Jane were engaged in some weird dance routine that had people raising their eyebrows, but Sam figured they were able to act however they wanted since it was their wedding night. He couldn’t help but smile as you threw your head back in laughter as Keeley tried to do the shuffle in her heels. 

“Oi,” Jamie nudged his arm, “You reckon Y/N will still be your date at Jane and Beard’s 25th wedding anniversary?” 

“Absolutely,” Sam replied before Jamie even finished his question, “I love her. There’s no one else for me, Jamie. I don’t think anyone can ever compare.” 

Jamie let out a breath, eyes widening as he took a sip from his bottle, “Sheesh, bold claim, man.”

“Honestly, I know she’s the love of my life.” 

“This is cute and all,” Colin interrupted, leaning across the table to meddle in Sam and Jamie’s conversation, “But have you told her that?” 

Sam shook his head, a goofy smile on his face, “No, not yet. I don’t know how I should tell her or what she’d say. I don’t even know if she feels the same way about me.” 

“You won’t know ‘til you tell her,” Jamie said, “And for what it’s worth, I think it’ll be a good response.” 

Sam took a sip of his own beer and then placed the bottle on the table. He cleared his throat, dusting off his dress pants. As the song transitioned to a slow song, he walked over to where you stood with Keeley on the dance floor. He tried to ignore the sounds of cheering from the table of footballers he just left, but he couldn’t help but bite his bottom lip to control his smile. 

Keeley was facing Sam so she noticed him before you did. She shot him a wink and bid you goodbye by squeezing your arm. As Keeley walked away, you turned around to find Sam with an outstretched hand. 

“May I have this dance?” He asked though he was already pulling you into him. 

“Always,” you responded, draping your arms around his neck while his hands found their way to your hips. You swayed slowly to the sound of the music, staring lovingly into each other’s eyes. You knew that there were others on the dance floor, hell, you knew that the newlyweds were right beside you, but somehow at that moment, you felt like it was just you and Sam. “Y’know, before I met you, I always thought that people were lying when they said that when they’re with their partner the whole world disappears.” 

“What do you think now?” he asked, spinning you around elegantly, “Do you feel that way with me?” 

“Mhm,” you answered. You let your right-hand cup his face. He nuzzled his cheek against your palm, a sigh of contentment leaving his lips. You rubbed his skin with the pad of your thumb, cherishing the way he melted under your touch. “When I met you, I was a train wreck. I was always working. I never took time to take care of myself and for a while, I really did forget how to take care of myself. Then you came along…” 

His smile turned shy as if he couldn’t believe that you were giving him the credit he deserved, “Then I came along…”

“Then you came along and reminded me how beautiful life could be if I just slowed down and took some time to breathe, to experience life, to smile,” you trailed off, not sure how you were going to word the next part. You took a deep breath, halting your movements before saying, “Sam, I lov-”

“No!” He exclaimed, a bit too loudly. He made a face of embarrassment, looking around the dancefloor to see couples staring at him oddly. Keeley, who was dancing with Roy, gave him a questioning look, “Apologies, everyone.” 

You chuckled quietly, moving his face to look at you again, “No?” 

“No- I mean- yes!” He babbled, “I mean, I don’t want you to say it first. I need to say it first. But I do, too. I do. I do love you.” 

You placed a soft kiss on his lips, giggling as you pulled away, “I love you, Sam Obisanya.” 

Sam chased your lips, unable to contain the smile on his face, “I like how that sounds.” 

“What?” you teased, “You like it when I say I love you?” 

“Can’t get enough of it,” he mumbled against your lips, “You’re gonna have to say it at least fifty times a day. Texts don’t count because I don’t get to hear your pretty voice say it. Phone calls are okay and voice memos are the last resort. I would prefer it if you were in front of me when you said it, though. ‘Cause then I will get to kiss you.” 

“You don’t ever need an excuse to kiss me, Sam.” 

“Thank God for that,” Sam said, spinning you one last time as the music came to a stop. 

As you fell back into his arms, he couldn’t help but imagine you at your wedding; how beautiful of a bride you’d be, how the lads would be cheering for Mr. and Mrs. Obisanya when the two of you walk into the reception, how in his vows, he’ll recount the moment he realized that he was going to marry you. 

You walked back to the table with Sam, hand in hand, with a glow that all of the boys noticed. Dani and Richard were fawning over something on Isaac’s phone, calling you and Sam over to take a look at it. When you saw the picture, tears pooled in your eyes. In the photo, you were staring up at Sam, laughing a bit as he stumbled over his words. Isaac managed to capture the exact moment Sam told you he loved you for the first time. Sam draped an arm over you, kissing the crown of your head, as he chuckled at how stupid he looked in the picture. 

Throughout your relationship, there were many “I love you’s” that followed, many photos that were taken and shared, and many other weddings you attended. But that photo, imperfect, silly, and a bit grainy, was your favorite moment– your favorite “I love you,” your favorite photo of the both of you, but it was taken at your second favorite wedding. Your favorite wedding was your own.

[fairsexynasty]

—DIFFICULT THINGS

jamie tartt x lasso!reader

ONE. TOWNIE

summary: lucy moves to richmond with a memory that doesn’t quite forget what her dad did to her. however, ted is as happy as a goldfish.

warnings: cursing, unlikeable female protagonist, father issues, abandonment issues, resentment

a/n: welcome to this very new series i WILL finish. my love for this show has overtaken my time and i am very excited to be writing this. this chapter is set during “two aces.”

——————

Leonard Cohen once said, “There’s a crack in everything; that’s how the light gets in.” But my world has been infused with the darkest of shadows. Everywhere I search is covered by a dark spot. It seeps into my life from my dreams, nightmares, and memories. I don’t think I was delivered by the hand of God, nor will I be expecting any blessing in the near future. It’s the hope that kills you.

I had that epiphany when I turned seven. No one had ever seen a child so jaded, so self-aware. When I learned that the father I wished for wasn’t that interested in fully being in my life, I accepted it entirely, for what it was worth. He’s popped in and out, coming in as quickly as he leaves, only sticking around for moments he deemed essential to me.

And the worse part is that he’s a good man—a good man with a daughter who felt evil.

I used to wish something terrible would happen to me. A broken collarbone. A car accident. Cancer. If something like that happened to me, I thought he’d return and stay for good.

But those things never happened. I’ve never broken any bones. I’ve never crashed my car into a tree. I’m perfectly healthy. And after all this time, Dad has moved on.

I have a half-brother. Thirteen or fourteen years my junior, it’s disgusting how I’m not too sure about the gap. I’ve never met him, nor do I want to meet him. I envy a child who cannot understand the weight of the word ‘father’ because he’ll always take it for granted.

When I crawl through my memories, I can see Dad crystal clear. He showed up to every one of my birthdays until age sixteen. That’s probably because my brother was old enough to ask and understand why Dad was leaving him. Dad came to my first dance, a father-daughter dance. It was one of the nights I honestly felt pretty. He and I danced the night away, stuffing our faces with candy and desserts and drinking our weight’s worth of soda pop. Dad taught me how to ride a bike. Although it ended with scraping my knees, he helped me up, cleaned my knees, and kissed each one. Dad drove me to my first day of high school. The morning went by quickly, but I can still remember the smile on his face as I waved goodbye to him and walked through the school doors.

I want to be thankful for what I’ve gotten from my dad. But he could have done so much more. Am I not worth the effort?

And it hurts to hate my mother as much as I do.

She could clean up her act for Dad, but once he was on his way home, she’d finally ease into consciousness. We would fight. She’d accuse me of not appreciating her. She’d belittle me and never congratulated me on my accomplishments. She’s manipulative. Controlling. Narcissistic. Evil. I know I’m no good, either. But women like that love confrontation. And she got the best of me every single time.

But I’m a grown woman now. I’m twenty. I have a life. A freedom I’ve never known. I’m trying to be honest, to prove I am everything Mom never thought I’d be. I’m trying to make Dad proud of me. Because everyone else is sure as hell proud of him, he’s Ted Lasso: a simple man with a simple plan who was pulled to spread his kindness in Richmond, England, by coaching their god-awful team. I watched the news with a frown as soon as they announced his new endeavor. If he got a new beginning, why can’t I?

And that’s why I decided to pack up my things and move to England.

I’ve been here before. My mother and I moved around due to her line of work. Whether it was Shanghai, Princeton, Kuala Lumpur, or Rome, I could never call those places home. I feel like Richmond is going to be different. I’m not hopeful. Just curious.

——

The park seems comforting. There appears to be a rhythm that compliments the people. Kids playing soccer, and shops opening for the day.

I sit and watch the world awaken. People pass me by as I sit on the bench, not one of them stopping their routine for me, except one.

lHis greetings were met with responses of “Wanker,” a word I found oddly endearing. He continued down the park trail, saying ‘good morning’ to me mindlessly.

I replied with a deadpan “Wanker,” which surprised him, given my American accent. He turned back, his eyes lighting up in recognition.

“Oh, my lordy-lord,” he muttered, smiling as he said my name, “Lucy.” He looks at me as if I’m a fucking unicorn. His eyes soften, and the smile that always reaches his eyes is suddenly on his face. “ Lucy !” he breathes out as if he’s too scared to say it louder like I’ll run away and leave.

“Hi, Dad.” He pulls me from my seat on the bench and envelops me into the biggest bear hug I’ve ever gotten from him. And those hugs are grizzly and unrelenting.

He lifts me off my feet and holds my head to his shoulder. “Oh, how I love you, Lucy girl. I can’t believe it!”

I groan, feeling slightly embarrassed. "Dad, please put me down. I'm not as tiny as Henry is," I say with a laugh. He puts me down with a smile, but there’s a flash of a solemn look on his face. I guess my mention of Henry has filled him with some semblance of guilt. I can’t tell if that satisfies me or not. "I think you're wondering why I'm here," I say, the false smile still on my face. "And the only reason is because I wanted to see you, Dad. I missed you," I add, trying to perfect the role of the doting daughter, even though it doesn't come naturally.

“Oh, I missed you too, Pumpkin. I’m glad you’re here.” He spots my luggage standing against the bench. “Looks like you’re gonna be visiting for a while, huh?”

I nod slowly, my gaze briefly shifting away. "Yeah, I am. Needed a change of scenery for a while," I admit, hoping he won't probe further into my true reasons for being here.

Dad nods, but I spot him scanning my face for any information I won’t outwardly tell him. Perhaps it’s a parently instinct, or maybe it’s just a Ted Lasso thing. The smile on my face doesn’t falter.

“So, how’s your mom?”

The question hangs in the air, and I can sense the curiosity in his eyes. I clench my jaw and roll my eyes in annoyance. "I really don't want to talk about her right now," I say firmly, hoping to steer the conversation away from a topic I'd rather avoid.

Dad gives me one of those fatherly smiles, understanding my need for privacy but also indicating he'll inquire about it later. "Alright then. How about we get you settled into my place? Don't care if you've found one already. I got you here with me, and you're not going anywhere, missy. I hope that's alright with you," he adds, his face hopeful as he waits for my response.

I acquiesce to his requests. It’s the least I can do. “Sure, Dad. I’d love to.”

He cheers with a fist pump, then wrangles me into yet another bear hug before I tell him he’s crushing my ribs, and he dramatically lets me go with a pout on his face.

I follow him down the streets to his apartment door. We enter, and it’s pretty lovely, yet it feels so hollow. There’s an opened jar of peanut butter on the island. I can tell he radiates joy as we unpack my things into an extra bedroom. I wonder how lonely he’s been without his son and wife.

Yeah. This is the least I can do.

——

After unpacking and settling in, Dad practically begs me to come to Nelson Road with him, and since I’m already feeling a bit guilty, I come along with him.

Upon entering, some guy with a full beard and eyebrows that make him look perpetually constipated looks at me. Well, it’s more of a glare. He walks up to Dad and me, not once taking his eyes off me. I narrow my eyes in response, shooting him a cold glare of my own. “Who the fuck is this? Don’t tell me Rebecca hired another fucking American.” His voice is deep and rumbling and full of snark.

"Seriously, do all British guys walk around with a stick up their ass?" I quip, but my remark falls on deaf ears. I catch the man clenching his jaw at my question. Ah, it seems he doesn't take kindly to being disrespected. One jab at his masculinity, and he's ready to go to war without a second thought.

"Roy Kent, meet my daughter, Lucille," Dad introduces, but I quickly interject, "Lucy to you." I emphasize my preference, not one to stand on formality. "Who the fuck are you, Roy Kent?" I ask, gauging his reaction as he looks between me and my dad, clearly trying to figure something out. I decide to clear the air, "Yeah, my mom isn't Michelle," I clarify, hoping to put any confusion to rest.

Roy's response is a simple "Oh," followed by a grunt as he exits the scene. My dad remains unfazed and carries on, guiding me towards the locker room with his arm casually draped around my shoulder.

"Coach Beard! We've got a new cast member!" Dad announces to the room as we walk out together, seemingly excited to introduce me to his colleagues.

A man with a book and a golf hat turns his chair around and observes us. “Well, well, well. If it isn’t the fussbudget,” he says. “Hello, Lucy. I’m Coach Beard. I’ve heard all about you.”

I can't help but snort at the situation. "That's impossible," I retort with a snarky tone. Coach Beard finds my reaction amusing, letting out a chuckle, while my dad gives a slight frown, but I know a few jabs won't easily rattle him.

Suddenly, a strong voice breaks the chatter, announcing, "Ayo, the gaffer's got another kid!" The rest of the men turn their attention to me, their eyes filled with wonder and intrigue. They excitedly chat, asking if they saw what they think they did.

Exiting the office, we step into the open room where my dad proudly introduces me to the team. "Fellas, I'd like to introduce you to my daughter. This is Lucy, everyone."

The players greet me with waves and hellos, except for one guy sitting on the bench, engrossed in his phone, occasionally laughing. I point him out, asking, "Who's that?"

"Jamie Tartt. Hey, Beard, what's the deal with Jamie?" my dad inquires, and seemingly out of nowhere, Jamie appears beside us without making a sound.

Beard responds, "Says he can't practice today. Says he's hurt."

I observe my dad's face dropping with disappointment as he turns to walk out the door and over to Jamie, concern etched across his features.

The whole situation was intense, and I couldn't recall ever seeing my father this angry before. It seemed like there had never been an opportunity for him to get this worked up until now. Watching him unleash his frustration on Jamie reminded me of my mom, who had her share of heated moments. While my dad appeared to be justified in his outburst, Jamie's disrespectful behavior only reinforced my 'British men suck shit' theory.

Feeling overwhelmed, a tingling sensation crept into my head, and my heart raced with the familiar signs of an impending panic attack. I needed to escape, so I swiftly turned on my heel and walked out of the office, trying to distract myself by fiddling with the rings on my fingers.

Wandering aimlessly down the halls, I searched for a private space to catch my breath and calm down. Passing a laughing man, a short guy carrying a laundry bag, and a stunning blonde woman who seemed out of place here, I stopped in my tracks when I heard my dad's name mentioned in a hushed conversation.

"Rebecca, I don't think Coach Lasso will be too thrilled about you trading Jamie away.”

“Higgins, listen to me. I don't care if Lasso is trying to get through to Jamie or if he begs him to come back. Jamie is not returning, and that's precisely what I need," she asserts before abruptly changing the subject, "Now, let me go hunt down my biscuits. They're late."

Realization hits me like a ton of bricks. Dad is being sabotaged. All this time, I believed he was here to make a positive impact on the team, but it turns out they see him as nothing more than a joke. Stepping away from the door, I attempt to make a quick exit, only to collide with a statuesque woman who towers over me.

She glances down at me, exuding power through her stature and fashion, but I'm not intimidated. "Why, hello there, whoever you are. Are you lost?" she inquires.

Ah, this must be Rebecca. The woman who plans to screw my father over. I can't help but roll my eyes at her. "No. Just looking for the bathroom," I retort.

Rebecca gestures towards the sign, displaying her passive-aggressiveness. "Well, it's just around the corner. Right where the 'bathroom' sign is," she points out.

"Cool," I respond nonchalantly, not letting her faze me. "Oh, and by the way, my name's Lucy. Thanks for hiring my dad to coach!"

I catch a flicker of terror in Rebecca's eyes before I walk away, grinning to myself. Drama seems to follow me wherever I go, even in Richmond. Old habits die hard, I suppose.

——

After my quick trip to the loo, I wander over to the dog track, where Dad and Beard stand, closely observing the team's training session. I can't help but chuckle at Jamie's predicament as he wears a penny and sets up cones.

Dad notices my arrival and playfully calls out, "Oh, there you are, Waldo! What were you doing?"

His attempts at humor fail to catch me off guard. While I understand his references, I refuse to engage in the corniness. "Nothing, just using the bathroom," I reply with a mischievous grin, not willing to spill the beans about Rebecca's scheming ways. "Oh, and I met Rebecca. She seems nice," I lie sarcastically, well aware of her conniving nature.

Before Dad can respond, a rather handsome player approaches us gracefully. "Hello there. Sorry, Coach Lasso, but I couldn't continue practice without introducing myself to our guest," he says with a charming smile. "My name is Sam Obisanya. It's a pleasure to meet you, Lucy. The other players and I were wondering if you'd care to join us on the field for a few minutes. We'd like to have some fun at Jamie's expense. Is that alright?"

I return Sam's smile and reply, "Uh, sure. But I haven't played in years, dude. Not sure I'll be any good among you professionals.”

Sam brushes off my concerns, reassuring me, "Oh, that's alright, Lucy. I'm sure Thierry will let you score a couple of goals. Come on!" With that, he guides me towards the field, announcing to the team, "She said yes, you guys!" Their enthusiastic cheers fill the air.

As we assemble for a quick game, a guy with a buzzed fade named Isaac addresses me, confirming my name, "Alright, Lucy, is it?" I nod, and he explains the teams, "We're gonna split into five and five, and you're gonna play with the lads who ain't got a kit on."

"Sounds good," I respond with enthusiasm. I turn to the guys without kits, and each extends a hand for a handshake. I go down the line, shaking hands with each one. There's a short man with curly hair, Bumbercatch, followed by a tall fellow with a broad smile, Jan Maas. Then, a highly energetic man named Dani Rojas greets me, not wasting any time to exclaim, "Football is life!" right in front of me. The last guy, a mousey brunette named Colin, completes the line-up.

Quickly getting into formation with my newfound teammates, they place me front and center for the play. I'm facing off with Sam, who gives me a friendly smile. At the sound of the whistle, we both dash for the ball, but I swiftly take control and dribble it down the field. Roy Kent charges towards me, determined to tackle the ball away, but I outmaneuver him with a quick juke, causing him to land on his ass. The guys react with astonishment, and suddenly, the game shifts from Sam's gentle start to full intensity.

Isaac rushes towards me, sporting a determined expression, but I pass the ball to Dani Rojas, who's open and ready. Dani drives it down the field, but as soon as he spots an opportunity, he passes it back to me. With precision, I shoot the ball into the goal, leaving the goalkeeper stunned as it whizzes past him.

The entire team stands in complete silence, including my dad and Coach Beard, who are both staring at me with their mouths agape. The momentary hush is broken by Jamie Tartt, who teasingly remarks, "Ay, wanker's kid just got you real good, lads." He winks at me, provoking a gag from me followed by a flip-off.

Isaac can't contain his excitement, exclaiming, "Shit, bruv! You just broke Roy Kent's ankles!"

Roy growls behind me, clearly not pleased with being outplayed. "You got fucking lucky, kid," he grumbles.

I don't back down, confidently replying, "Luck's got nothing to do with it. Either you're cursed or you just ate shit, Kent."

I have to admit, Richmond has exceeded my expectations thus far, but I won't let it get the best of me just yet.

[bbymunsonx]

The Last Time (Ted's Version)

Chapter Four

chapter warnings: language, implied sexual content, sexual tension hehe

word count: 2.4k

After embarrassingly crying to Ted about my sex life, I quickly had to run back to my flat before I embarrassed myself even more. 

When I get back to my flat, I took out my laptop and started to Google all the players on the team. Jamie Tartt, Roy Kent, Sam Obisanya. I even decided to Google Ted, purely out of curiosity. I thought I'd get a bit more caught up before our first official day of work. 

Jamie's results were what I expected. I'm definitely gonna have to work on his branding, I thought to myself.

Roy's results were pretty clean. Most of the articles just talked about how he should start to think about retiring because of his age and his supposed knee problem. 

Sam's results were about how he came to England from Nigeria to play for AFC Richmond. In every interview he does, he mostly just talks about how much he misses home. 

Ted's results made my heart drop. There were some positive things about him, but most of the things that people were saying about him online were sickening. 

Ted Lasso: Richmond's New Hillbilly Coach. 

One of the links had a video of Ted with the Wichita State Football Team. It looked like the team was in the locker room after winning a game, where they were all dancing with Ted. The football players all honestly looked like they adored that man. One of the football players in question, Julian Silva, my lovely ex-boyfriend. 

After getting to know Ted better, seeing footage of him and Julian together is enough to make my stomach churn. They are complete polar opposites. Knowing Ted, he was probably way too kind to him. A lot kinder than he deserved. 

***

The next day was our first "official" day at AFC Richmond. Naturally, Ted welcomed me at my front door with a coffee in one hand and a box of fresh made biscuits in the other. 

"What's this?" I asked while taking the box. 

"Just a little something. You gotta let me know how they are before I give 'em to the boss. Just take a little nibble." Ted eagerly waited for me to take a bite. 

"Holy shit-" I said with a mouth full of biscuits, "This is delightful. How the hell do you know how  to make this shit?"

"Google... and baking shows, of course." Ted answered. 

"The Great British Bake Off baby," Coach Beard chipped in. 

"I'm telling you, you two become more and more interesting by the day." 

When we arrived at the stadium, we all went our separate ways. Ted went to find Rebecca to give her his homemade biscuits, Coach Beard went out on the pitch, and I found my way down to my office. 

Being logged onto Richmond's socials and keeping an eye on all the comments, especially the comments revolving around Ted, was quite exhausting already. People on the internet could be so cruel. After moderating their socials for a bit, I found a livestream from Richmond's official page that they were doing a press conference, right now.

Shit, Ted probably had no idea they were dong this, I thought to myself. After reading the comments, it seemed like probably one out of ten people had something nice to say. Then it went down to zero after Ted had accidentally spit on the entire audience of journalists. Today was going to be a long day. 

After closing my laptop for a quick breather, someone knocked on my door. "Anyone in here?"

"Yeah, come on in." I responded. In came a girl that I thought looked vaguely familiar. She looked around my age, maybe a little bit older than me. Where have I seen her before?

"Hello! I just wanted to come and meet you in person! I'm Keeley Jones!" She came running up to me and giving me a hug. 

"Hi! I'm Lacy." I hugged her back, why not?

"I know! God, you're fucking fit." She took a step back and really stared at me for a second. 

"I'm not really sure what that means, but thanks!" I awkwardly laughed. "So what do you do around here?"

"I'm kinda famous for being almost famous, if that makes sense. I was with Jamie Tartt for a little, but we actually broke up a few days ago. I do a lot of PR work for the team, too, yeah?"

"Oh shit," I exhaled. Now I know where I know her. She came up when I was looking up Jamie earlier. Thank God I'm not a homewrecker. 

"But I'm not taking your job or anything. You're actually way more qualified than me." Keeley laughed. "We'll be working together, if that's alright. I do more of the 'getting them sponsorships' and shit and you're more of their public image of the players and the overall club. I have a feeling we're gonna be great friends, Lace." Keeley smiled.

"Me too, Keeley." I smiled back. 

***

"Lacy, come in here a second, would ya?" Ted called from his desk to mine. I'd been splitting my time evenly between being on the pitch with the coaches and the players and being in my office. I wanted to make sure I knew what they were doing, but I also wanted to make sure I was doing my job and moderating their socials. 

"Yes, Coach?" I said with my voice slightly raised and my lashes fluttered, obviously being facetious. Why not have some fun and spice up the day?  I decided to get comfortable and sit atop of his desk. 

After clearing his throat, visibly affected by my comment, Ted managed to say, "I wanna throw a birthday party for Sam. He's just feeling a bit homesick at the moment and he needs to know that we're on his side. So are you free tonight?"

"What makes you think I'd literally be doing anything else?" I raised an eyebrow. 

"Well, I didn't know if you had plans with a certain Mr. Ja-," Ted laughed as I cut him off. 

"No, Ted. I will be there."

"Great, see you later," Ted got up and touched my arm before leaving the office, causing my heart to almost fall out of ass as I looked over at Coach Beard, who of course, had his head in a book and didn't witness any of what happened. Ted always touches people in their arms when he talks to them. That's just his thing. 

"Are you gonna go to the party tonight, Beardo?" I asked. 

"Beardo?" I finally got him to put the book down.

"Is that alright?" I questioned. Maybe Ted touching my arm is causing me to act all weird. 

Beard took a second to think before responding with, "I'll allow it." He then got up and left the office, leaving me just sitting there on Ted's desk, all alone.

***

 After going back to my flat and getting ready for the party, I settled on a little cocktail dress that Rebecca put in my closet. 

Ted Lasso: You ready, spaghetti?

Lacy Watson: As ready as I'm gonna be.

Coach Beard: Can I bring a girl I met today?

Lacy Watson: When did you meet a girl? You were at work all day?

Ted Lasso: We're just gonna keep tonight a work casual thing. If she's like any of your other gals, we don't wanna scare Sam. Maybe next time, Bud. 

Coach Beard disliked " We're just gonna keep tonight a work casual thing. If she's like any of your other gals, we don't wanna scare Sam. Maybe next time, Bud."

Rhythmic knocks rapped against my door. "Come in!" I yelled down. A few sets of footsteps came up my stairs when suddenly Ted and Coach Beard rounded the corner into my living room. A part of me panicked realizing this was their first time in my flat. 

"Look at you!" Ted called out to me, causing me to roll my eyes. 

"Let's just go." I groaned. 

I wore my sneakers during the walk so I wasn't suffering in my heals. When we arrived at the stadium, Ted had sent Coach Beard in while he helped me change into my heals that I brought in my bag. Ted, being the gentleman he is, knelt to the ground to help give me some balance. 

"Are you nervous about seeing Jamie? You didn't really see him today at training." Ted questioned, while letting me hold onto his shoulders while putting on my heals. 

"I'm not that bothered by it. Either way, tonight is all about making Sam feel at home. I have to put my stupid boy drama aside for the night."

"Panda?" Ted looked up at me. There was just something about this man knelt before me, looking up at me, that made my stomach do acrobatics. 

"I think we should choose a different word. There's just something about a grown man saying the word panda that's just a little funny," I joked to change the subject. 

"Whatever you want." Ted looked down and smirked. Just as he was about to say something else, Coach Beard came running outside, huffing all out of breath. 

"There you guys are! I thought you got lost!" He exclaimed. 

"You're such a smart-ass." I laughed. Ted got off his knees and escorted Coach Beard and I into the stadium. 

Football players were standing all throughout the locker room with drinks in their hand, deep in conversation. The locker room was filled with balloons, streamers, and miscellaneous birthday decorations. "Who did this?" I questioned. 

"Oh, that would be me." Nate came out of nowhere. 

 "You did an awesome job, Nate-dawg. It looks great." Ted slapped Nate on the back, to which he smiled. 

"Yeah, this looks awesome, Nate." I smiled at him. "If you'll excuse me, real quick. I'm gonna go find Sam."

After looking around the locker room, I found Sam deep in conversation with Colin Hughes. "Hi, Sam! Happy birthday!" I went to shake his hand since I didn't formally meet him yet. He pushed my hand away and gave me a hug. 

"Thank you, Ms. Watson! This is such an amazing surprise. It's been really hard being away from my family, so thank you for helping me feel less alone."

"Of course, Sam. And please, I'm only four years older than you. Please just call me Lacy."

"Yes, Lacy." Sam smiled back. 

"Enjoy the party." I gave Sam a side hug as he continued his conversation with Colin. As I went throughout the locker room, looking to see if Keeley had showed up, I saw the last person I wanted to see, Jamie Tartt. 

"Hi, Jamie." I decided to be civil, especially if I have to work with him. 

"Hiya, Lacy. Nice party." He took a sip of his drink, probably his second or third drink of the night. 

"Hm." I just nodded in response, not really knowing what to say. 

"Let's get you a drink." Jamie took my hand to get me a drink. I didn't really feel like a drink tonight, especially because I wanted to get some work done when I got back to my flat. 

"That's alright, Jamie. I don't really want to." I looked to my left and saw Ted staring daggers at Jamie. He was on the complete other side of the locker room, so he couldn't even possibly hear what we were saying. 

"Cmon, just one drink. For old times sake," Jamie winked at me. 

"How can that possibly be for old times sake, that was three days ago." Sometimes Jamie genuinely confused the fuck out of me. 

"Just have one drink with me and I'll leave ya alone, yeah? Let's just be civil." Jamie continued to persuade. 

As soon as I saw Ted start to walk over to us, I heard a deep voice come from behind me, "She's not having the fucking drink, so get the fuck out of here." Roy Kent. 

"No one's talking to you, Grandpa." Jamie looked behind me and stared down Roy. 

"Is there an issue going on here, fellas?" Ted finally made his way over, standing directly next to me. 

"No one's talking to you, wanker. I'm trying to give Lacy an opportunity with a real man, yeah?" Jamie laughed to himself. 

"I think you've had too much to drink tonight, Jamie. How about you just go home before we all do something we regret." Ted sternly said to him. If looks could kill, Jamie would be dead on the floor. 

"This party fucking blows anyway." Jamie threw his drink on the floor and walked out. Tears started to form in my eyes. I really wanted to be civil with Jamie, but he may be making that impossible. 

"Come here," Ted took my arm and I went with him but stopping him before we got too far. 

"Wait a second," I pulled away for a moment to turn around to Roy, "Thank you, Roy." I gave him a tiny hug, to which he grunted and walked away. I was gonna break through him. I could feel it. 

I ran back up to Ted as he was talking to Beard, "I'm just gonna take her home. You've got it from here?" 

Coach Beard nodded. 

***

It was a very silent walk back home with neither one of us knowing exactly what to say. 

Ted broke the silence first, "Do you want me to say something to him tomorrow?"

"No, Ted. It's alright. He was drunk. I don't think he's a bad guy, just stupid." I laughed a little, to which Ted nodded. 

"Alright, then. Just give me the word and he'll be off my team." Ted responded sternly. No hint of a joke behind his tone. I just nodded. 

When we made it back to the flats, Ted stopped at the foyer and as always, asked if I wanted to join him inside for a drink. 

"I think I'm gonna call it a night. I gotta catch up on all our socials and I don't even think I have the energy to do that." 

"Well, don't work too hard," Ted pointed a finger at me. 

"I make no promises. I gotta prove to the boss lady that I'm worth keeping around."

"Touche. Well, have a good night, Lacy Loo."

"Goodnight, Teddy."

He walked into his flat the same time I walked into mine. After the door shut, my back pressed against the door as I felt it difficult to catch my breath. All I could feel were the butterflies in my stomach, trying to pull me into his flat. Though it's only been three days, I had to stop lying to myself. I wasn't just being flirty for the hell of it. I didn't reject Jamie Tartt because he's not a good looking guy. 

No. I was falling for Ted Lasso. 

Fuck. 

authors note: these next few chapters are gonna get sooooo good I love writing jealous Ted and I wanna keep writing more of him hehe I cannot wait to write the gala ep I'll leave it up to your imagination for now. also!! lacy and roy's friendship is gonna be the end of me I swear <3 im gonna try to have a chapter out every other day :)

taglist: @nerdgirljen

[itsalinh]

It’s 5:30am here and who needs sleep when we can stay up and talk about s03e06 Jamie and Roy?

Friendly reminder, Jamie used to have Roy’s poster on his wall when he was a kid. To every young kid out there, the one on their wall was their hero, a role model that they strive for every single day. Jamie grew up thinking that someday, he’d be like Roy Kent. You know, the Roy Kent who played for Chelsea, which arguably the most successful club in London, the Roy Kent who won a fucking European Champions League. This precious and reputable UCL trophy is the dream of every footballer. Some would measure a footballer’s success by how many prizes they got, and believe me, this trophy is a rock solid proof.

Jamie is a great player with so much talent, he signed for Manchester City (a real deal in EPL), and he also made it to the team line up every damn time. MC is always known for their squad-depth in every position, and it’s not easy to always be on the starting XI list. I’d like to think that Jamie looked up to Roy a lot, he keeps training and training, with a hope til some day he could win trophy just like his role model.

Jamie finally got a chance to play alongside Roy. He must have been crazy about it. But their early days was not so easy. Jamie came to realise Roy had changed, he was no longer the one Jamie idolised so much as before anymore. He felt angry and disappointed. Jamie became the one in charge of the locker room, directly against the team captain. Things weren’t going well.

Luckily enough, the new manager came and steadily alternated the locker room tensed atmosphere. Both Jamie and Roy acknowledged their own problems, as well as the other one’s. They finally understood each other better. That hug, oi, it was like a big smash to the final concrete wall between them. It was not the action coming out of a spur of the moment. Roy felt the urge to comfort his team member, his younger lad, his friend. He knew a hurt Jamie needed that.

This season saw a further change in their relationship. They trust each other more and more. And this time, they even open to each other about their utmost vulnerable thoughts and memories. Roy and Jamie are not the type of people who would share their feelings to somebody else. Roy hid them under his rage, while Jamie just suppressed them because of his “dad”. For the first time, Roy admitted that he let out all of his anger on Jamie, sometimes for no reasons. And goshhhhhhhh, Jamie did not even question that, he shrugged it off immediately and literally said “For Grandad”. Such a beautiful char arcs from both of them. In return, Jamie also share some of his traumatised and heartfelt memories with his “dad” and mom. I don’t think he ever told that to anybody, even with Keeley or Ted. So this is a positive sign for their mental health, and I love to see men talking about their feelings like true heroes.

These football himbos are taking up spaces in my mind. And honestly speaking, I’ve been really sad and disappointed and depressed while watching an actual football club recently, and another lighthearted fictional football club is making my days a lot better. So guys, say thank you to Ted Lasso!

[gilmores-glorious-blog]

HI okay so i finally watched the new ted lasso episode and i’m. holy shit. i have so many thoughts.

- COLIN! MY LOVE! most of my thoughts revolve around him tbh,, i am so fucking thrilled that he’s finally getting his gay storyline. while some parts of it are being handled… questionably, it’s still such a good feeling to have thought a character is queer for so long and then get it confirmed. i’ve always loved colin but god my love for him has just skyrocketed,,, there were so many things that just make me so sad for him, from the hiding his face with sunglasses, to having to laugh off jokes about being gay, to the whole chameleon bit, to his mantra, to him having to introduce his boyfriend as his wingman….. it’s all devastating and i want nothing more than for him to be able to be out and be loved and accepted by everyone. someone please give this boy a hug.

- speaking of boys who need hugs….. jamie 🥺my forever love…. he was so good this episode and i just felt so bad for him. he’s become so self-aware though and i love it!! also he is so incredibly well-acted that it makes me insane… the little things like how he fidgets with the bottom of his shirt when he’s nervous or upset and how he flinches constantly… he makes me sad and i adore him. also his earrings were hot and he’s so bisexual.

- and my third love, trent….. i am so so nervous for next week but i’m leaning towards being hopeful. he was amazing in this and i love him and his gay little stares and poses and princess diaries enthusiasm. i don’t think he’s going to out colin, and i honestly wouldn’t be worried at all if it weren’t for the ominous-as-fuck song choice at the end. also? i?? briefly entertained the fact that if they don’t go the shitty outing someone route, they very well could go down the queer mentor route??? and i would???? lose my entire mind if we got canonically queer trent crimm thank you and goodnight.

- also ted? my main mans?? please for the love of god get some help.. i know you’re in therapy and that’s a good step but this is so unhealthy you can’t just keep joking about things and hoping no one notices that you’re on the brink of a complete breakdown. my heart was breaking for him this whole episode :(

- how tf is will the kit man 25. i deadass thought he was 19.

- i. hate the sam and rebecca plotline with a burning passion. i love sam. i love rebecca. i hate them together. that girl at sam’s restaurant seemed so sweet let’s pursue that instead please and thank you!

- final note is that i love jesus christ superstar and i’m so happy it was on the soundtrack <3 (also, as i said to my brother during that scene: “top ten jamie tartt judas moments.”)

[geralt-of-baevia]

Begin Again: Chapter Three

Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three

Summary: When Penny starts working at AFC Richmond as their new head photographer, she catches the eye of a certain mustached, happy-go-lucky, head coach of the team. But can their spark endure through the season’s pressures and the demons of their past?

Pairing: Ted Lasso x OFC (Penny Fletcher)

Word count: 4.5k (YOWZA!)

Warnings: Drinking, flirting, etc.

A/N: Alright, I know this chapter took a while but it's a BIG one. This chapter was so much fun to write and I think you're all going to like it 😍😍😍

Beta: Thank you to @midnightswithdearkatytspb for proofreading and the AMAZING banner! I love it.

Tiny Tag List: @tegan8314 @rosesheerio @eugene-emt-roe @floralsightings @imvibin69 @justsomefunshit (Let me know if you want to get added!)

The next morning I was terrified to go to work. I paced the apartment, looking at my phone every two minutes, counting down until I had to leave. 

“Penny, why are you so nervous?” Jo asked, giving me sarcastic smile. Sometimes I just really wanted to slap her. I narrowed my eyes at her, folding my arms across my chest and shifting my weight to one hip. 

“Oh, I don’t know, Jolene, maybe because my colleague I fancy saw me showering naked-”

“I mean, that’s usually how you shower-”

“-so not only do I have to face Ted over that, but I’m terribly nervous about what Jamie bought as replacements…”  I said, shifting my weight to my other hip. She playfully rolled her eyes at me. 

“Penny, Jamie is loaded. I have no doubt that he got you only the best quality things to replace your equipment,” she told me, “Also, it's nice to finally hear you say you fancy Mr. Lasso because I thought I was going to have to waterboard you or something to get it out of you.” 

I let out a big huff, finally going and deflating in the armchair as an act of defeat. 

“Joey, I just can’t face Ted-”

“Would you like me to drive you to work today? I’ve got the day off so I can take you, Even walk you in if that’ll help?” she offered. I gave her an over-exaggerated pouty face, sticking my bottom lip out. 

“I would wove that vewwy much,” I said in a mock baby voice. She laughed, shaking her head at me. 

“Go get the car warmed up, I’ll get ready really quickly,” she said, walking over to the hallway, “keys are on the hook.”

I squealed excitedly and shot up out of my seat. “Thank you, Joey!” 

My leg bounced the entire way to work, and every so often Jo would put a comforting hand on my knee to calm me. 

“Honestly Penny, I think you’re making a way bigger deal of this than you need to,” she told me as we drove onto Nelson Road. My heart started nervously pounding in my chest. 

“Okay, but what if he doesn’t bring it up? Do I need to? I just don’t want it to be a giant naked elephant in the room!” I exclaimed with a laugh. 

“I mean, you could make it fair-”

“Jo, I don’t want to see him naked-”

“HA, that’s a lie. I know your pervy little mind,” she said as she tapped her pointer finger to her temple, “you’ve already thought of that man naked, plenty. And now probably in the shower with you…” I felt my cheeks burn hot and rosy. She wasn’t wrong, but that wasn’t something I wanted to think about as I went into work and had to see him. 

Jo pulled into the parking lot and parked. Once the car was off my body grew hot with anxious anticipation and I could feel my heart beating in my entire torso. We got out of the car and as I was getting my bag from the backseat, I heard my name being shouted. I looked to my left and saw Jamie approaching me, a large shopping bag in his hand. 

He gave me a giant smile once he saw I had his attention. “I got the goooooooods!” 

I giggled a little bit as he jogged over to us the rest of the distance. 

“Jamie, thank you so so much for doing that,” I told him once he was at the car. He scoffed. 

“Penny, it's the least I could do. How else are we supposed to get that wicked sliding shot?” he gave me a friendly wink and I pulled him into a hug. 

“Oi, so you’re the one who broke my little bird’s camera, huh?” I heard Jo ask. Jamie pulled back from our hug and turned to Jo. 

“Now Penny, why haven’t you introduced me to your gorgeous friend here?” he asked, looking Jo up and down. I looked over to her just in time to see her roll her eyes playfully. 

“Jamie, this is my best mate and roommate Jo, Jo this is-”

“Jamie Tartt doo doo doo doo doo doo, oh I know who he is,” she said with a smug smile, also looking him up and down. The sudden tension between them made me feel like I shouldn’t be there. 

“Well, now that this has been such a lovely and not at all awkward introduction, shall we go inside? I’m going to need to set up the camera before I do anything today,” I said with a huff. Jamie and Jo both nodded in agreeance, and we all went inside together. 

We walked with Jaime to the locker room, and the closer we got the harder my heart beat in my chest, and my stomach grew sour. But to our surprise, Ted wasn’t in the coach’s office; only Coach Beard and Roy were to be found. 

“Oi, where’s Coach?” Jaime asked Beard, and Beard shrugged in response. 

“I’m not sure. He just said something came up last night and he wasn’t going to be able to make it today,” he explained before turning to me, “I know we were supposed to get some coach shots today, but maybe we’ll wait until next week?” 

I nodded, my stomach easing a little knowing Ted wasn’t at work today. Jo nudged my side and leaned close to my ear and whispered, “I’m sure something came up alright…” I shot her a look, rolling my eyes at her. 

“Is everything okay, Fletcher?” Roy asked. He had gotten in the habit of calling me by my last name. I didn’t know why, but I didn’t question it. I looked up at him from Jo and shook my head.

“No my friend Jo here was just making an inappropriate comment,” I said, looking back at her and giving her a stern stare. She stifled a laugh before turning back to Roy. 

“And I’m Jolene by the way, so nice to meet you all,” she said, giving them both a small wave. Coach Beard’s eyes grew wide at the mention of her name and I giggled. 

“God, I wish Ted was here so that I could have experienced you two learning her name for the first time together,” I said, causing Roy to break his stony stare and crack a small smirk.

“We’re a fun pair, huh? Best mates who are both named after famous songs. What are the odds, right?” Jo piped in. 

“You’re really named after the song?” Beard asked. Jo nodded. 

“My parents went through a country phase when my mom was pregnant with me,” she said with a shrug, “they had just wished I was born a red head and not a blonde.” 

We all chatted for a few more minutes before Jo and I left the guys to start practice, heading out into the club to go to my uncle’s office. Once the door was shut behind us, I turned to Jo. 

“Okay, but what the actual fuck was that with Jamie?” I asked with a breathy laugh. She threw her head back with a laugh. 

“Oh god, nothing is going to happen with that boy. He thinks he can try, but I don’t think so,” she proclaimed proudly. I playfully rolled my eyes at her. Knowing her as long as I did, I knew when she was into someone, even if she played it cool. 

We made it to our destination, and I knocked on the door after we approached it. 

“Come in!” I heard Uncle Leslie say from the other side. Jo opened the door and my uncle’s face lit up when he saw us. 

“Hello, Penny! And hello, Jolene! It’s been forever since I’ve seen you!” he said excitedly. He closed his laptop and placed his elbows on the desk, resting his chin on his now intertwined fingers. “How can I help you ladies?” 

“Hello Mr. Higgins, it’s very nice to see you as well,” Jo said cheerfully. 

“Well, I don’t know if you heard, but Jamie broke all of my camera equipment yesterday,” I said with a sigh, sitting down in one of the chairs in front of his desk and gently setting the fragile bag in front of me. He gave me a forced, flat smile. 

“I did indeed. Jamie came to me after you left to ask what he should get,” he told us, “did he get the correct equipment? I only know so much about photography. But I did tell him the person at the camera store would know best.”

“I mean, honestly I haven’t even looked at it…”  

I pulled over the bag that Jamie brought me and opened it up, my eyes lit up at the site of what he got me. 

“Well? Is it okay?” Jo asked. I nodded as I pulled the box that had the camera body out of the bag, putting it in my lap. 

“Okay? This is like, top-of-the-line stuff,” I said, looking up with a huge smile. I was in disbelief. The camera I was holding in my lap cost more than I was willing to truly consider. 

After we looked over the new equipment together, I got myself set up in a corner of my uncle’s office and Jo left to go get her day started, not needing to stay any longer since Ted wasn’t here.

I spent the rest of the day setting up my camera, replying to emails, updating my computer, and catching up with my uncle. I hadn’t spent this much time with him since I was a teenager, so it was nice to reconnect with him. He was always my favorite uncle. 

“Do you have any fun plans for the weekend?” my Uncle Leslie asked me as the day was finishing up. I sighed, looking at my phone to see if I had any notifcations. 

“Well, I think Jo and I are going to go to the pub. She wants to celebrate my first week at my new job,” I said with a content smile. I was very much looking forward to having a couple of drinks and just shooting the shit with my best mate. 

“Oh that sounds like a good time. You deserve it! You’ve honestly blown all of us away just on your first week. I’m very proud of you,” he said, a sincere grin spreading across his face. 

I felt tears sting behind my eyes. Quickly I tried to blink them away, but it was no use. They spilled down over my cheeks and I hotly wiped them away. 

“Thank you, Uncle Leslie. That means a lot.”

When I got home, Jo was already at least a third of the way ready for going out. I set my stuff down next to the door and she came out into the living room, toothbrush still in her mouth. 

“You need to get ready,” she mumbled flatly around toothpaste. 

“But it’s barely 6 o’clock,” I half whined at her. She rolled her eyes at me before heading back into the bathroom. I followed her, leaning against the doorframe as she spit into the sink. 

“Well, it’s going to take you at least 30 minutes to get ready, and then we have to still get there which will probably take around the same amount of time. So we won’t even get to the pub until like 7. And we can stop at that fish shop you like before we go too,” she explained, “so in other words, get your arse ready. Please.” 

I jokingly rolled my eyes at her and headed to my room to get ready. I threw on something acceptable but still comfy, an outfit that wouldn’t turn too many heads but was still sexy. 

Once I was done getting ready, I went over to Jo’s room and hovered in the doorway again. 

“How does this look? Yeah?” I asked before spinning to show off my outfit. 

“You look fit,” she said with a cheeky grin before turning back to her mirror to finish her makeup, “if only Ted could see you…”

I scoffed at her. “Yeah, well, I’d like to forget about him for an evening and just relax, mmkay? So no mention of him from here on out.”

She turned to me again, drawing an X over her heart with her pointer finger. “I cross my heart and hope to die, I will not mention the mustached coach for the rest of the night.” 

I giggled. 

“You better not.”

After a train ride and a stop at the chip stand, we reached our destination. I was thankful for the little pub that Jo and I always went to. It was small and quaint, in the basement under some other business. The exposed brick walls and dim lighting made it feel homey and comfortable. We found it one night while searching for somewhere to get a drink after work when we lived in this neighborhood a few years back. One visit and we were won over, it becoming our 'usual' spot.

We ordered two pints and a shot of whisky each at the bar, and then went over and sat in a small corner booth by the fireplace. We took our shots and I quickly moved on to my beer. After downing about half of mine in one gulp, Jo shot me a disheartened look.

“Penny, you need to relax-”

“What do you think I’m trying to do?” I asked with a sarcastic laugh as I gestured to my drink. 

“No no, we need a toast!” she exclaimed. She raised her glass up and I followed suit.

“To Samantha Penelope Fletcher! The bird who has overcame so much shit in her 29 years and finally got her dream job!” she said with exaggerated enthusiasm, clinking our glasses together. We each took a large swig of our beers, me finishing mine. 

As we set our drinks down on the table, I watched as Jo’s eyes flickered to just behind me, before returning her gaze to me. She raised her eyebrows, a mischievous expression growing on her face. 

“What?” I asked. Her face slanted into a sarcastic grimace, her eyes shifting away as she took another drink of her pint. 

“Jolene, what?” 

“Well, lets just say ‘he who shall not be named’ is sitting over there at the bar,” she said with a nod of her head. My whole body grew hot and my stomach soured. I wanted to turn around and look, but my body wouldn’t move. “And it looks like someone here needs another pint…”

I huffed, my lips trilling. “And you’re not going to go get it for me, are you?”

She shook her head no. 

“You’re going to make me, me, your bestest mate in the whole world go?”

This time she nodded her head. “Go my little nymph, go!” 

I narrowed my eyes at her before gritting out a, “fine,” to her through my teeth. A wicked grin played across her face. 

“Man, I might have to move to a closer booth so I can hear…” I rolled my eyes at her as I stood up, shimming my fitted black dress down to its proper position before grabbing my empty glass and heading towards the bar. 

I felt as though another person was in control of my body, telling my legs to keep moving in the direction of Ted. Once at the bar I stood behind him for a second, trying to figure out the best way to approach this. I decided that buying myself a drink and just 'noticing him' would have to do.

As I took a seat at the bar next to him, I raised my hand up to get the barman Albert’s attention, raising my empty glass once I had his attention. After ordering my drink I pretended to not notice Ted at first, but did a fake double take to realize it was him.

“Ted?" I asked, giving him another look over. He glanced up from his drink, apparently not having realized that anyone had sat down next to him. He gave me a look over, before realizing who it was, or at least I hoped so.

"Oh! Well hello there Penny Lane," he said a bit more cheerfully than his facial expression showed, “I almost didn’t recognize you…”

My face furrowed in confusion. “How so?”

"Well, I'd have to say you're much more dolled up than you are at the club," he said, hiding a grin in his glass before taking another drink. 

I felt myself blush, hoping that the dim lighting would hide that from him, but I doubted it would. Thankfully, Albert came over and handed over my drink, momentarily distracting me from my warm, rosy cheeks. I thanked him, holding out cash to give to him, but Ted stopped me.

"No, no. Put it on my tab," he said. I slowly retracted my hand back away, putting my money back in my bra. Albert gave me a knowing wink before nodding to Ted.

"Well, thank you. You didn't have to do that," I told him before taking a sip of my drink. He shrugged, giving me a small smirk and a sideways glance.

"It's the least I can do. After…you know," he said before trailing off and gulping down the last of his drink. He set it down on the bar, motioning for another. I couldn't read the emotion on his face. 

“Oh, Jesus, Ted, I mean, honestly-”

He cut me off. “I apologize for cutting you off because my grandma taught me you never interrupt a lady like this, but I’m currently the perfect mix of guilty, booze and well, stupidity, and I have to get this out before I burst like a can of Pillsbury crescent rolls,” he sighed before turning to me, our eyes meeting. 

“I need to say how sorry I am about yesterday. I can’t- I can’t stop thinking about how vulnerable and exposed you must have felt. I mean, gosh Penny. I don’t even know what to say. I’m just-I’m just so embarrassed. If I had known that you were in there-”

I put my hand on his forearm to calm him and stop him from rambling on. 

“Ted, first off, please breathe,” I said, giving his arm a soft squeeze. Not breaking eye contact with me, together we took a deep breath through our nostrils and then out, my eyes darting to his slightly parted lips. I nodded in approval, and he nodded back. “Better?”

“Yeah, yeah better,” he said with a sigh. I moved my hand from his arm and picked up my beer, taking another drink. 

“You know,” I said, wiping the corner of my mouth with the pad of my thumb, “I didn’t realize I had a triple threat see me naked…”

His eyebrow knit together and I giggled at his confusion. The booze was definitely settling in my bloodstream. 

“Yeah! Now tell me, how does one become whisky? Exactly how much whisky are you? Is it an even ratio to the guilt and stupidity?” I explained. A stupid grin suddenly appeared on his once forlorn expression at my dumb joke. 

“I’d say it’s probably a 40/30/30 thing,” he replied with a scrunch of his nose. 

“Is the 40% whisky, because if so we have a problem Coach Lasso,” I giggled. He took another sip of his drink, resting it in his hand. 

“Then maybe a 10/40/30,” he corrected. I paused, doing the mental math through my beer fog before laughing. 

“Ted! That’s only 90%,” I joked, pushing on his shoulder playfully. I watched my hand almost like it was a foreign object, it seeming to have done that all on its own. I brought it back to my beer, taking a drink. 

“How did you know this was whisky?” he asked, lifting the glass in his hand. 

I shrugged. “I know I might be drinking pints right now, but trust me, I know a good whisky when I smell one. May I?”

I put my beer down and held my hand out for his drink. His eyes lit up, both taken aback and impressed by my actions. He held his short glass out to me and as I took it, my fingers brushed his. My heart started pouding in my chest at the feel of his skin under my finger tips, and I had to remind my tipsy brain to focus on the drink and not it’s owner. 

I swished the glass around before bringing it up to my lips and taking a small sip. The amber colored liquid stung as it hit the back of my throat, causing my face to wince slightly. 

“Good god Ted, you’re drinking this whisky neat? Like, not even on the rocks?” I asked, making a face at the glass as I handed it back to him. He chuckled. 

“Well, what can I say? I’m a purist at heart when it comes to drinking,” he said proudly. 

“Or your tastebuds are just shot after only drinking something you could sterilize a wound with during WWI,” I said with a laugh. 

As I picked up my own drink to get the taste of the whisky out of my mouth, Ted took it out of my hand, bringing it up to his lips without saying a word. His eyes widened as he realized what I was drinking. His face soured as he swallowed, coughing a little. 

“So you’re-you’re telling me, you just now were talking about how mine tastes like rubbing alcohol, when you’re sitting here in front of me drinking a Guinness? That drink is more bitter than Scar when Simba was born and he knew he was never going to be king,” he said, giving my glass an amusing glare. 

“Um, yes. This tastes like hops and has hints of coffee and chocolate. It’s absolutely delicious,” I stated proudly, taking my beer back from him, “and didn’t your grandma teach you to not take a drink from a lady without asking when she taught you about cutting them off mid sentence?”

The expression on his face was nothing short of impressed. “You have happily surprised me, Penny.”

“How so?” I questioned, genuinely curious for his answer. As I took another drink waiting for him to reply, I felt my body grown warm, my vision getting a tinge fuzzy around the corners. The temperature of my body continued to rise between the alcohol and my nerves, even though those were currently masked by faux confidence from the before mentioned booze. 

He opened his mouth to talk as I began to take my jean jacket off and placed it on my lap, exposing my shoulders to the cool air. His voice hitched in his throat, causing him to cough a little, his eyes never leaving me. 

“Yes?” I pressed, raising my eyebrows at him. 

“Oh, yes, um, sorry,” he said, and I could tell he was fending off embarrassment. “Just that I never expected you to drink pints of Guinness and know whisky by the smell or…”

His cheeks turned red, and after his eyes scanned down my body he buried his nose in his drink, taking an audible gulp. My eyes widened and I couldn’t help but let out a giggle. Ted’s eyes darted back to me as he brought the drink down to the bar. 

“Well, I think there’s a lot that would surprise you about me,” I teased with a smirk, picking up my drink and chugging the last half. I set the glass back down with a loud clang, wiping my mouth on the back of my hand. He raised his eyebrows, cocking his head to the side in interest.

Before I could get other word out, I felt a familiar hand on my shoulder. Ted looked over my shoulder at someone and I followed his gaze, turning around to see Jo. 

“ It’s Joey! TED! You have to meet my friend. You’re going to LOVE her name,” I exclaimed a little too loudly. 

“Hello, I’m Jolene, this little blonde bundle of Guiness’ best friend and roommate,” she said, putting a hand out to Ted. He took her hand in his and shook it. 

“Nice to meet you Jolene- wait Jolene?” he asked, it dawning on him. A stupid, drunk, shit eating grin spread across my face. “Wait, you mean like the hit song by our Lord and Savior, Miss Dolly Parton?”

Jo smiled. “That’s the one!”

“Well butter my butt and call me toast. Best friends with names from song titles? That’s pretty gosh darn cool if I do say so,” he said, his speech slightly slurring. 

“Isn’t it the best?!” I stated, still too loudly.

“Alright, well it was very nice finally meeting the man I shouted ‘wanker’ at for a long time, but I do believe I need to get this little light weight home. Did she drink an entire pint while over here?” Jo asked Ted. He nodded. 

“And made fun of me drinking whisky,” he added.

I giggled to myself, thinking back to that interaction. “It was hilaaaaaaarious. You should have seen his face!”

“Ohhhhhkay Penny, let’s say goodbye to Ted,” she said, putting her hands on my shoulders to help me get up. As I stood my knees wobbled, thankfully Jo caught me though. I draped my jacket over my shoulders, it making me want to be in my bed cozy and warm. 

“Are you going to be okay getting her home, Jolene?” Ted asked, a look of concern on his face. 

“That’s very sweet of you Ted, but I’ve got her. This isn’t going to be the first time I’ve had to cart her drunk ass home…or the last,” she said, turning to me and giving me a wink. I scoffed, giving her an over exaggerated face. 

“Alright then. Well, was nice to meet you Jolene,” he said, nodding to her with a large grin, “and it was good seeing you Penny.” 

“It was good seeing you, too, Coach. And thank you for my beer! That was very kind of you,” I said, giving him a smile. 

“Anytime, Penny.”

As Jo and I began to walk away, I stopped, my brain acting before my common sense could catch up and stop it. I leaned in close to Ted, my lips practically brushing his earlobe. 

“I was going to tell you,” I started softly into his ear, “one thing that might surprise you about me is that I didn’t hate you walking in on me naked, and I don’t think you hated it either.” I stepped away, giving space for me to see the shocked but relieved look on his face. 

I gave him a scrunched nose smile. “Goodnight, Coach.” 

Jo and I exited the bar, and the moment we were outside she stopped me, holding me arm’s length. 

“Did you just tell Ted what I think you did?” 

I giggled. “Mmhmm.”

She wrapped an arm around my shoulders and began to walk us in the direction of the tube. “I can’t wait to tell hungover Penny what you just said.”

[invisibleraven]

"i'm sorry did you just call my birthday my 'womb escape'??" for the Greater Polyphantoms Polycule?

"I'm headed to the mall, you wanna come?' Carrie asked the assembled group.

"Hard pass," Luke mumbled around the guitar pick in his mouth. "But will you bring me back a soft pretzel?"

"If you can remember your manners and ask nicely," Carrie replied.

"Please?"

"Fine. Any one else?"

"I've got a dentist appointment, otherwise I would, sorry," Alex said apologetically.

Julie barely looked up from her book and shook her head, and since she was using Reggie as a chair, he just shrugged with a 'what can you do' expression.

"I'll come, I need to get some new socks," Willie replied.

"I'm down, Flynn piped up, grabbing her purse. "I gots gift cards to spend."

"Oh yeah from your..." Willie stopped, the word on the edges of his brain, but unable to make it to his lips. "Womb escape!"

"I'm sorry did you just call my birthday my 'womb escape'?" Flynn asked, hands on her hips.

"Birthday! That's the word!" Willie said with a snap. Then he looked at Flynn. "Sorry, my brain no words good today."

"Another shite in nining armour situation?" Carrie asked.

"Yeah."

"Okay, now I'm double confused," Flynn said as they climbed into Carrie's little pink Bug.

"We were watching Ted Lasso," Carrie explained. "And one character had a brain fart. So they said shite in nining armour instead of knight in shining armour."

"And my brain does that sometimes. Mostly when I read, thanks dyslexia," Willie explained. "But sometimes when I'm speaking too."

"Sounds awful," Flynn replied.

"Eh," Willie replied with a shrug. "I usually just laugh it off, but it's the first time I've ever said something as dumb as womb escape."

"I mean, it is apt," Flynn conceded. "Just please never say it again."

"Seconded, I think I'm traumatized," Carrie joked.

"I'll buy you a PinkBerry to make up for it," Willie said. "Or an Orange Julius."

"What I'm hearing is that you're thirsty and magnanimous," Carrie stated. "But I will glad accept."

"Me too," Flynn stated. "Then I am hitting LuLuLemon cuz mama needs a new set of yoga pants."

"Fine by me, I think they have a sale on now anyways," Carrie replied. "Where do you wanna get socks Willie?"

"Figured I'd look around the GameStop, they have new Pokemon socks out and I wanna see if there's a Gengar pair," he said. "Plus I promised Alex I'd pick up the game he pre-ordered.

"Honestly I never would have thought of Alex as a gamer before now," Carrie said. "Reggie yes, but Alex?"

"It helps relax him," Willie said. "Plus he can kick Reggie's ass any day of the week at Smash Bros. Not Carlos' though-that kid is a killer."

"I think he'd resent you calling him a kid since he's nearly twenty, and taller than you," Flynn said.

"I've known him since he was twelve, to me he'll always be a kid," Willie stated.

"How do you think Flynn and I feel? We've known Carlos since he was in diapers!" Carrie interjected.

"Anyways, I told him I'd stop calling him kid when he could legally drink, or when he stops referring to me as his cousin Throckmorton, whichever comes first," Willie said.

"Guess he's kid for another two years then," Flynn giggled. "He's never gonna stop calling you that."

"There are worse things he could call me I guess," Willie finally said.

"Alright losers, let's go shopping!" Carrie said as they pulled into the mall.

They all barrelled out of the car, Willie leading the way, because as much as he loved the girls, and shopping, he wanted to get his smoothie on first.

[mihrsuri]

20 questions for fic writers

I was tagged by @isagrimorie - thank you darling <3333.

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 234

2. What's your total Ao3 word count? 364,199

3. What fandoms do you write for? Currently: The Tudors (TV), Shadow and Bone/Grishaverse, Tamora Pierce (largely Tortall at the moment but also Emelan), West Wing, Hunger Games (mostly in the form of a lot of Fandom AUs set in the Hunger Games) and Narnia. But I’ve written for a lot of others including Criminal Minds, Pundit RPF, Band of Brothers, Scarlet Pimpernel (1998), Spooks/MI5, The Hour, Doctor Who (Nu!Who) and Star Trek Discovery.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Undertow (co-authored) (Criminal Minds, Rossi/Hotch) - The very short version: Dave gives Aaron a back-rub.

It’s not because of you (it’s because of me) (Ted Lasso, Jamie Tartt) - Brian Symonds was - fuck is one of the best youth talent coaches in the country it’s just he’s also been arrested and all Jamie can think is fuck (one take on Jamie’s backstory)

Five times out of many david rossi realised he was happily doomed (Criminal Minds, Rossi/Hotch) - Basically what it says on the tin. Five ways David Rossi knew that he was totally totally doomed in the best possible way in regards to the way he loved these kids

To dwell in enchantment (Criminal Minds, Rossi/Hotch) - It doesn't make the world any less messy, but it does make a balance, this family he has. David Rossi, coming home from work.

If i could go back (co-authored) (criminal minds/ncis/csi: ny, rossi/hotch) - It's the day of Derek's high school graduation, and Jason Gideon is standing at the bottom of the porch steps, trying not to hope.

5. Do you respond to comments? I do my absolute best (sometimes sadly spoons :/) but I appreciate every single one of my kind comments.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I think it might be Hope Deferred Maketh Something which features Jason Gideon/Toby Ziegler, an apocalypse set in a diner in New York (I actually think the larger world is hopeful but these characters specific corner of the apocalypse is Very Much Not).

Oh no wait also In Pardoning That We Are Pardoned which is a Spooks fic in which a certain episode The Thing Is Real.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hi Tudors OT3 Verse. Just in general. It’s not that there’s a conflict free path but it’s very very much a happy ending.

8. Do you get hate on fics? Very little but I have, yes and I will be honest it did get to me. And I am still working through it but moderating comments has helped a lot. And it was honestly barely anything compared to what so many people have to deal with.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yes and also kind of no. I used to write it more and then uh, Trauma Brain. I can’t have sex because of CPTSD reasons and apparently writing sex is also triggering except sometimes the fictional people (or the fictional representations of fictional depictions of historical people) still do in fact have sex and so I write it. But it’s Weird (I think I do okay for never having had consensual sex though).

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? I think I actually write more fusion AUs than crossovers in some ways but I have in fact written a Sherlock-L&O: UK-Thick Of It-Pundit RPF-Modern Tudors-Criminal Minds Multiverse cc @bibliothekara

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? I was going to say I have but I actually don’t know/recall for sure so I’m going to say no. I have had podfic made of my fic though which is So Cool. (I would be delighted if anyone wanted to translate though).

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? I have! Fantastic experience. Also just tossing AUs/ideas back and forth in general is So Much Fun and one thing I really loved about LJ fandom.

14. What's your all time favorite ship? I mean there’s Faramir/Eowyn my beloveds.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Into The Fire (The Tudors Scarlet Pimpernel AU). It’s going to get so dark and I’m not sure I actually want to go there because a bunch of people are going to die.

16. What are your writing strengths? Characters and like, description and emotion.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Dialogue.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I’d want to double check really carefully with someone who actually speaks the language in question (I’m currently checking about thou/thy formal versus intimate usage and that’s for English which I speak) before I did.

19. First fandom you wrote for? The first fandom I published fic for was The Bill. It was, perhaps not surprisingly angst and whump centric (before I knew what that was but) and may survive somewhere on the internet via the Wayback Machine.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Several:

With Snow Far Below (Band of Brothers, Roe/Renee) - Renee thinks in terms of snow and chocolate

Monuments, Historical & Contemporary (Criminal Minds/Pundit RPF, ensemble) - How they could build statues and memorials and think that by paying homage after the fact, they were doing an honor.

I Am A Princess On The Way To My Throne (Skyfall 2012, Severine) -Severine. And the way it could have been (written because aspects of her story are mine and I unashamedly wanted a different ending for her)

Such A Time As This (Tudors, Anne Boleyn) - "You have come to your royal position for such a time as this" or a retelling of the story of Queen Esther with Anne Boleyn as a Mizrahi Jewish lady.

We Rise Together (TWW, CJ Cregg) - CJ was kidnapped, not Zoey.

Once I Fall In Love (It’s Forever) (Kushiels Legacy, Phedre and Delaunay) - She loved him as she did me. The realisation had come suddenly, a shock [AU mini fic for Kushiel's Dart]

Karma Is My Family (Grishaverse, Inej) - Inej smiles at her friends who are her family, warm and full of love. Smiles at her husband, who has never possessed her or owned her - has never thought of their love that way - only as two hearts shared. [Inej and her power, her kindness, her love and the way karma comes for Tante Heleen]

Rewrite The Stars (Tudors, Anne/Henry/Thomas) - In another world this is how it might have gone between the three of them. The story of how the love between three extraordinary people change the world for the better and made it the kindest. The story of a fight for a fairytale. [An expanded version of the Tudors OT3 verse fic Rewrite The Stars]

Tagging: If you want to (and if you want to do consider yourself tagged): @bessemerprocess @endoftheworldhere @unseenacademic @emilykaldwen @shes-a-voodoo-child @onekisstotakewithme @claudiajcregg @holy-ships-x-red-lips @quillington @theladyelizabeth @naurielrochnur @eidetictelekinetic @dr-dendritic-trees @boleynecklace @nocompromise-noregrets @herawell @sarking

[emma-m-black]

Sister Kent - Chapter Three

Ted Lasso/OC (Roy Kent's Little Sister) (FanFiction) - PG

Takes place in season one, the night the Roy goes to Ted's flat and talks to him (and gets offered peanut butter). Ted and Roy's little sister hit it off.

This is a rough draft as always and I wrote this to be 4 chapters. Hope you enjoy.

Author Master List

Read Chapter One, Chapter Two,

Chapter Three:

“Thank you, Phillip. I can finish clearing up if you wanted to head home.” Juliet was standing in the examination room, a group of patient folders in her hands. Her hair was tied back and out of her face, having spent a good portion of the day working on some players and going over files.

“I won’t argue with that. Have a good night Juliet.”

Most of the clubhouse was dark. Only those finishing up their day remained, and Juliet could hear the familiar and faint voice of one Ted Lasso. She was sure that she had seen Coach Beard leave already, backpack on and phone to his ear.

Putting the files to her desk, Juliet decided she would finish her tasks in the morning before the players got in and instead grabbed her jacket and bag and, while placing her arms through the straps, she made her way towards the Manager’s Office.

As she covered the distance, she noticed the voice quiet, until there was just the sound of the washers and the steps of those remaining. Juliet entered the first room and could see Ted through the window. His elbows were on the desk, his head was in his hands and his shoulders were drooped. The stance of someone with something on their mind, the stance of someone that you normally want no one else to see. So, taking a few steps back out of the room, Juliet stood, knocked on the wall as she re-entered the room with a smile on her face. “Shouldn’t you guy be home by now? Big game tomorrow.”

“Juliet?” Ted’s head shot up from the table and he gave a few quick blinks. “What are you still doing here?” The normal Ted smile quickly came across his face.

“Pretty sure Phillip wants to be out of here the minute the game is over tomorrow, so I spent my day doing paperwork, and now I’m starving. How about you Coach? My treat.”

“Sound like the perfect end to the day.” Ted stood up and slipped on his jacket before loading up his backpack. It was at this moment that the screen on his phone which laid on the desk lit up. A picture of a young boy filled the screen and a text that said:

Henry: Good Luck Tomorrow! I believe in you!!!

Juliet would not pry as to who Henry was, as she had a pretty good idea already. However, she had been caught by Ted while staring at the device. “My son, Henry.”

“He’s cute.”

“Yeah, he’s the best parts of me,” Said Ted as he picked up the phone, stared at the picture for a second and then pocketed the device.

Ted let Juliet lead the way out of the room and out of the building, and once they were out in the cool night air, Ted stopped and looked around the empty staff parking lot. “Wait, you don’t have a car?”

“I do, but I prefer commuting and walking to work. The exercise is excellent, especially when I have to work late, because that usually means I’ve been sitting all day. Also, I like people watching.”

A sigh left Ted’s lips, and he pulled on the straps of his bag. “I have to ask...”

“Was I adopted?” Juliet quickly cut off with a laugh as she walked towards the gate.

“I was gonna go with switched at birth.”

Both laughed and then Juliet looked at Ted as they walked. “I like to say Roy couldn’t handle the amount of happiness he was given, so I had to take it all. Honestly, though, he’s a teddy bear. I just think, he spent most of his time taking care of me, and then when he had to leave for football, he blamed himself for leaving me behind with our parents. They were always so busy trying to keep things going, pay for us to do the things we wanted, but that meant I was left alone a lot.”

“Is that why you came here?”

“Yeah, he beat himself up for leaving me for his football career. I mean, I know he would make no other decision, and it wasn’t his place to take care of me. I thought maybe if I could come back, maybe it would help. But I see you’ve already done that for me. You are different, Coach Lasso.”

“Not the first time I’ve heard that, and probably won’t be the last.”

“Well, whatever it is you are doing, Coach, don’t stop.”

The rest of the trip was filled with small talk, almost as if they were approaching topics too deep and thus needed to sidestep. When they arrived at The Crown and Anchor, they each ordered a large basket of crisps to share and a burger each, along with a pint.

When May sat the basket of chips down and two pints with an enormous smile on her face as she looked at Juliet and eyed the Richmond logo on her jacket. “Well, aren’t you a pleasant upgrade from this git’s normal company?”

Ted let out a laugh. “May, meet the charming Juliet Kent. She’s just started working at the clubhouse. Juliet, this is May, our esteemed host.”

“Pleasure to meet you dear.” Greeted May before she leaned slightly to her right, putting herself closer to Ted. “Quite the catch there, Ted.” And then she was off before either party could say anything in response.

Ted cleared his throat and let his eyes fall to the basket. “I’ve almost been here a year and I still can’t get used to calling these chips.” He lifted a thin yellow potato between them, examining it before popping it into his mouth.

“I can’t believe you call them fries.” Said Juliet with a raised brow, before she too picked one up and popped it in her mouth. “Like, it rhymes with cries. Do you only eat them when you are sad or something? Oh no, are you sad?” The smile on her face told Ted that she was only teasing, and Ted’s eyes lit up in response but then slowly they dimmed.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean...” Juliet trailed off, knowing that she had hit on something, but not being sure exactly what was on his mind.

“I was going to fly back home after the season. Henry and I made all these plans, but now, now I’m going to have to stay in a hotel, or worse yet, stay with my mother.” Ted placed his arms on the table and linked his fingers together around his glass. “I only came here to give Michelle space, thinking that was the solution and I know it’s better for the both of us to be apart, but what is that going to be like to Henry? Seeing me there, but not at home?”

Juliet reached across the table and wrapped a hand around Ted’s wrist. “I’m sure he will just be happy to see you, and to spend whatever time he has with you. I assume that means you plan on sticking around here?”

“Rebecca wants to extend our contract, wants Beard and I to stay on another season at least, win or lose, but I don’t know. I came out here for reasons that don’t really exist anymore.” Ted’s eyes fell down to where Juliet’s hand rested against his skin.

“You do whatever feels right to you Ted, but go see your kid. As someone who never got to spend much time with her parent’s, it’s what I always wanted. Kids are a blessing Ted, don’t forget that.”

Juliet’s eyes turned glassy as she said this and with a quick shake, she pulled her hand from Ted’s skin. “Sorry, can you excuse me for a moment? All that water I drank is haunting me.”

Without waiting for a response, Juliet stood up and moved towards the restroom. Ted watched as she walked away from the table and wondered what caused the sudden sadness behind her eyes.

“So, can I expect to see her around her more?” Asked May with a smile, pulling Ted from his thoughts.

“Probably, she seems to get along pretty well with Beard and I.” The implication that May was making was lost on Ted, and instead his answer was just honest to the moment.

“Ted, she’s fit. If you don’t I will,” Said May with a laugh, placing the burgers down on the table. “You deserve to be happy too. Don’t forget that.”

“May, I’m pretty sure she is half my age.”

“It’s just a number Ted.” May patted him on the shoulder in a motherly way and then walked away just as Juliet was coming back to the table.

Watching as she walked towards him, he could see the shine of unshed tears in her eyes, and his heart gave a lurch in his chest.

“Oh, thank goodness.” Juliet said with a smile as she sat back down in her seat and looked at her burger. “Now I don’t have to fight you for the chips.”

While they ate, Juliet asked questions about the team and the club. About Rebecca, and Keeley, who had come bounding into her office earlier that morning to introduce herself. They had finished their food, including the entire basket of chips and two more beers each, when May finally kicked them out of the pub.

“Well Ted, I’ll see you tomorrow.” Said Juliet as she backed up a few steps from Ted and in the opposite direction that he as going.

“Are you close?”

“I live in Gloucester.”

“I don’t know where that is,” Said Ted with a laugh.

“It’s a good distance from here.”

Ted’s chest tightened as he watched her walk away. “I wouldn’t be much of a gentleman if I let you walk home on your own. Can I offer you my couch? I would feel mighty bad if something happened to you. Besides, if you want to sober up, we could chug some water, and I will make you a nice, strong cup of coffee in the morning. No funny business, I swear.” Ted held his hands up in surrender as to emphasize his point.

“No funny business?” Asked Juliet as she stepped forward toward Ted.

“I mean, I won’t try to sleep with you.” Said Ted simply as Juliet came to stand next to him.

Bumping her shoulder into his. “What a shame.” Then she let out a laugh. “Come on Lasso, I’m tired.”

Once they had traveled the short distance to Ted’s flat, he let them in. Once they were both inside, Ted took their jackets and hung them on a coat rack in the hall while Juliet moved into the kitchen. Having seen where the cups were held, she grabbed two and filled them both with some water from the tap.

When Ted entered the room, he graciously took one cup from Juliet, and the two stood in an awkward silence as they drank. She stood leaning back against the counter with both hands wrapped around the cup and Ted stood about five steps away, one hand in his pocket and the other around his own glass of water.

“This is awkward, isn’t it?” Ted finally asked, breaking the silence. “I made it awkward with that sleep with you joke.”

“Yeah, but like in a good way.” Juliet replied as she looked over the top of her cup at Ted with a raised eyebrow. Then a laugh left her lips, and soon after Ted followed suit, and once they had both finally quieted down, and their chests were warm with alcohol and laughter, Juliet turned to look into the sitting area. “Ted, I can’t let you sleep on that.”

“It’s fine.”

“Ted, you are like six feet.”

“Six-One actually.”

Juliet finished the rest of the water from her glass and set it on the counter. “How about you lend me a shirt and I will sleep on the couch? Then you can make it up to me when you feel super guilty in the morning that you slept in your own bed, by putting food and coffee in front of me.”

“This better not hurt my street cred.” Said Ted with a laugh.

“If you want, I can shove a pair of panties in your pants pocket to find once you're at work?”

Ted let out a hearty laugh and set his glass down next to Juliet’s. “Just carry an assortment of undergarments with you, do you?”

“I’m prepared for anything, Ted. I work weird hours, travel with the teams full of men. So I always carry emergency clothes.”

“You carry emergency clothes, but no pajamas?”

Juliet looked at Ted with a smile. “Maybe I just wanna steal one of your shirts.”

“You’re gonna be trouble, aren’t you?”

“Yeah, that’s usually what happens when I latch myself onto a new friend.”

Ted examined Juliet, from her dark wavy hair, dark brows and freckle-less face, to the tips of her toes and back up again. “Nope, still don’t understand how you two are related.”

“Just stop trying to figure it all out and accept it for how it is Ted. Now, show me to the loo so I can brush up and change.”

Juliet slept surprisingly good on the couch, and as she slowly awoke she realized it was the sound of hushed voices from the kitchen that had dragged her from her slumber.

“Do you think you are gonna win today, dad?”

“It would be nice, but you know what I say.”

“It isn’t about the wins and losses.”

“Exactly.”

“Mom and I will be watching. I can’t wait to see you.”

“I can’t wait to see you too kiddo, but I better go okay. I need to wake up Beard and I did promise to make him breakfast and coffee.”

“Okay dad, love you!” Henry was no longer whispering and instead shouted through the phone.

“Love you too Henry.”

Juliet slowly propped herself up on her elbows. Staring into the kitchen, she found Ted sitting in the chair opposite her with a sad smile on his face. “He sounds like a lovely kid.”

“He is.” Ted said as he sat his phone down and looked across the room at Juliet. “Well, gosh darnit! You’re one of those people.”

“One of what people?” Asked Juliet as she tossed the blanket off of herself and stood up from the couch with a stretch.

“Those people who wake up from bed in the morning looking like...” But he voice trailed off Juliet reached towards the ceiling, stretching her arms and fingers to their full extent and causing the shirt she was wearing to follow, exposing more of her bare legs to the surrounding air. “Like you just had a beauty team attack you, and not like you’ve just woken up.”

Juliet turned and looked at Ted, a smile on her face as she brought her arms back down to her side.

“Damn, Capulet gotta’ go makin’ that shirt looks better, too.” This was spoken a lot softer.

The heat flared up in Juliet’s face and she was sure that she was the same colour as the slightly faded red Kansas city shirt she was wearing. With a breath, she pulled on the way too long for her shirt and smiled at Ted. “You know I have to steal this, right?”

“Wouldn’t expect any less.” Said Ted before rising from his chair and running a hand through his bed head.

“So I don’t know what Beard’s appetite is like, but I’ll eat double that, please.”

“Sorry bout’ that. Figured it was...”

“Easier than telling your son that you had a woman he’s never met before, sleep over on his dad’s couch. Don’t worry, I understand. You don’t need to justify anything to me about what you think is best for your son.”

Ted ran a finger across his mustache as he stared at Juliet from across the room. “Is this you flirting with me, cause’ I gotta’ be honest, I’m feeling very out of my element. I haven’t been single for a long time and I’m in another country, I’ve now had a one-night stand with Sassy, and now I got you standing there looking like somethin’ out of a magazine I would have hidden under my bed from my momma.”

A light laugh left Juliet. “Yeah Ted, this is me flirting with you. Beard told me everything that happened, why you came over here about the divorce. So this is me flirting, but not going any farther, because like I said, I cling hard, and I don’t want you to hurt me if you realize New Ted isn’t this Ted. You need to figure out who Ted Lasso is now, before you can start worrying about anything else. Also, who is Sassy? Is she hot?” Juliet asked in earnest, the wiggle in her brow causing Ted to let out a laugh.

“You are a smart cookie. I knew there was a reason I liked you. But you gotta’ explain to me how you got all this from Beard?”

“Oh, we are texting buddies. Although I’m in his phone as Julian and I’m pretty sure his girlfriend thinks you are gay, but that is besides the point. I want to hear all about this one-night stand you had.” Juliet bounced into the kitchen with an enormous smile. “Is she hot? Was she good? Do I get to meet her?”

“A gentleman doesn’t kiss and tell.”

“Perfect answer Ted. Now can we eat? I’m hungry!”

Chapter Four

[madmaddoxfuryroad]

getting in on the fun because i only have few days left to wear my clown make up with pride.

as much as i would love to see a full confirmed tedbecca endgame, i am not the most confident in that happening at this point. and even though i might be a little bummed, i would be okay with them not going there so long as they really take the time to acknowledge just how fundamentally important these two have been to one another and give their relationship the attention it deserves in this last episode.

with that being said, i believe it would truly be a disservice to these two characters if we did not get an “i love you”. and before you write me off as tedbecca trash (i mean, i am but not the point) HEAR ME OUT. i don't NEED it to be in a romantic context at all. in fact, the one thing i keep coming back to that gives me quite a bit of comfort is how 30 rock handled jack and liz.

if tedbecca really is nothing more than platonic soulmates, they still deserve no less than what jack and liz got in their finale. which was honestly a beautiful scene that paid respect to the relationship between these two characters. that acknowledged how indispensable they had been to one another. that made me cry. and if they can do that on a show like 30 rock, that never took itself too seriously and was often irreverent about so many things, surely a show as earnest as ted lasso would do AT LEAST this.

what might this scene look like you ask? oh don't worry. i got you covered.

to preface: i like to think of it as a sort of hybrid of the 30 rock jack/liz finale scene and the fantastic beasts newt/tina scene before he gets on the boat all wrapped up in an airport scene because of course it is. 

i am operating on the popular assumption that ted told rebecca at the end of the last episode that he is moving back to the states. and as such, some of the finale episode is focused on ted trying to have dedicated moments with each character as a way to say goodbye (ie. crown & anchor one last time with beard). 

so i would think that for rebecca it would be their last biscuits with the boss. but due to plot reasons (maybe rebecca is off helping bex with her divorce or whatever that storyline is going to be), they are unable to get the timing right and that last moment never happens. 

ted, taking a page out of doctor sharon’s book, decides he will at the very least write her a goodbye letter. he pairs it with a fresh box of biscuits, along with the recipe, and leaves it all with higgins to give her. 

rebecca, however, does not take this as an acceptable send off. when presented to her, her expression is unreadable, but almost looks angry. she snatches the letter from higgins and marches out. 

~airport scene~

ted is in the airport with henry (yes i decided he comes to london to see the last match and if this does not happen, i blame michelle). they are walking toward their gate.

rebecca: (spotting ted & henry) THEODORE LASSO!

her tone carries across the terminal. she sounds angry. ted’s head snaps up. he sees her almost immediately. he looks confused. rebecca continues making her way toward them. once she is almost in front of the two, ted leans down to henry.

ted: hey bud, why don't you go buy us a pretzel and i’ll catch up to you in a sec?

as ted is saying this he is searching his pockets for money. at the same time rebecca is already in front of them. her expression softens a little toward henry. she pulls out cash from her pocket.

rebecca: (handing henry the money) it’s on me.

henry examines the bill.

henry: this is a hundred pounds.

rebecca: and keep the change. (&take that doctor jacob)

henry looks to his dad for permission. ted just shrugs. henry takes this as the green light to go get his pretzel. he runs off contentedly. ted turns his attention back to rebecca whose expression has returned to angry. 

rebecca: (holding up the letter) what the fuck is this?

ted: (still looking confused) did you read it?

rebecca: no i didn’t fucking read it. what the fuck is this?

it’s subtle, but her tone shifts from pure anger to anger laced with hurt.

ted: yeah, i’m sorry about that. i wanted to say your goodbye in person, but you were busy all day and then before i knew it i had to make like a tree and leave (looks up, sees rebecca is unamused. this is not the time for folksy wordplay) ...for my flight. 

rebecca is still holding up the letter. this did not answer her question. ted takes the hint and continues. 

ted: but i didn't want to go without saying anything so i wrote that and left it with higgy for when you got back. 

rebecca nods. taking in what he is saying. she folds the letter into quarters. creasing it a couple times, mulling over her next words. 

rebecca: (much softer now. but the hurt is still audible) did it ever occur to you that you’re not the only one who needs to say goodbye, ted?

comprehension finally dawns on ted. a contrite look crosses his face, but he stays silent. he knows she is not done speaking.

rebecca: because i cannot fathom the idea of you back in kansas not knowing exactly how much you have meant to richmond. and to me.

she gives a soft smile. he meets her eyes, wordlessly telling her she can go on. 

rebecca: (somewhat pulling back from the moment) i hope it’s something you already know. so perhaps me making the point of saying this is a terrible waste of your time. and now that i’m thinking about it this whole dramatic airport chase is starting to feel a bit foolish. i’m sorry. i shouldn’t’ve––

ted: oklahoma.

ted has not broken his gaze the whole time. rebecca meets his eyes again, a little surprised at how quickly he cut her off. she nods. 

rebecca: right. then. i’ll just say it. because this is something you of all people deserves to not only know but to hear. 

beat. 

rebecca: and it’s the best way i can properly express how profoundly important to me you have grown. 

beat.

rebecca: so i’m just going to say it now. 

longer beat. rebecca is struggling to say what she wants to say. her eyes are starting to grow glassy, but not quite tear-filled. 

rebecca: i don't know why this is so difficult. what i am trying to say...

rebecca closes her eyes, trying to recapture the confidence she had at the start of the conversation. 

ted: it’s okay. you don't have to. (simply) i love you, too. 

rebecca’s eyes dart back open to meet ted’s. her expression is blank for a moment then she quickly pulls him into a hug (very truth bomb #1), which he immediately reciprocates. she hugs him a little tighter.

rebecca: i love you.

still in the hug, ted cracks a smile. 

ted: hey. there it is. 

they break apart. ted is still grinning. rebecca is wiping away a tear, but smiling as well. 

ted: now that wasn’t so bad.

rebecca lets out a tear-filled laugh and lightly shakes her head ‘no’. she smiles back at him. 

she wipes her eyes again, happy with herself that she was able to say what she wanted to say. 

rebecca: well, then. off you pop!

rebecca gives him a nod, letting him know he can go back to his son. ted turns back toward henry. about halfway he stops and looks back at rebecca, who is still standing in the same spot. she gives him an encouraging smile and a small wave, which he returns. 

once she sees ted has rejoined henry, rebecca smiles to herself, turns on her heel, and starts to leave. 

henry: rebecca!

rebecca turns back at the sound of her name and sees henry running toward her, pretzel in hand. ted is jogging behind him. 

henry: i wanted to say thank you.

rebecca: oh no need to thank me. you’re very welcome for the pretzel. 

henry looks down at his pretzel.

henry: oh not that! well, thank you for that too, but i meant thank you for everything you've done for my dad. it made it a lot easier being away from him knowing he has nice people like you who care about him over here.

rebecca: (looking at ted) well he certainly does. (turning to henry) it was my pleasure, henry.

rebecca extends her hand to henry. they shake. 

ted puts his hand on henry’s shoulder.

ted: come on, bud, we should get over to the gate and let rebecca head home. 

henry: okay. we’ll see you tomorrow?

rebecca: (deeply confused) sorry, what’s tomorrow?

henry: the first digital biscuits with the boss, karlie kloss!

rebecca shoots ted a look. ted raises his hands in surrender and points to henry. 

ted: all his idea. and only if you’re up for it. but we figured we could facetime you. even if it’s just once a week or once a month and––

rebecca: that sounds wonderful. 

rebecca beams at ted and henry. 

ted: good. well, we best be going. say goodbye.

henry: (waving while already turning away) bye, rebecca!

rebecca: bye, henry!

ted takes a step toward rebecca. he reaches for the letter that has been clasped in her hand this whole time. he undoes the extra folds she had nervously made, until it resembles how it looked when higgins first gave it to her (save for the additional creases).

ted presents it back to her. 

ted: goodbye, rebecca.

rebecca: (carefully taking the still unopened letter) goodbye, ted.

they hold each other’s gaze for one beat longer. and then he is back with henry walking toward the gate. they don't look back again. 

~cut to~ rebecca in the back of her car leaving the airport.

she is looking out the window, but redirects her gaze to the letter still in her hand. rebecca finally gives in and opens the letter. 

she pulls out a piece of paper with a single sentence written on it. she rereads it a couple times over, smiling to herself: i think i’ll miss you most of all. 

i was going to end it at off you pop. but i couldn’t resist giving henry the chance to interact with rebecca since we were robbed of this dynamic. i think i got a little off message along the way. well i hope you enjoyed this chaos anyway.  

**bonus details for the shippers I left out of the scene: -when ted is searching his pockets for cash, he pulls out the green matchbook again -part of the reason this interaction can take place at all is because the flight had been delayed. due to weather. thunder and lightning.  -and as part of his thank you to rebecca, henry gives her another army man, so hers doesn’t get lonely. and he mistakenly calls it a green matchbook army man (ted politely corrects him, it is a matchbox army man, but the damage is done)

[itsclydebitches]

Honestly, I think most of the issues in this season exist because they clearly planned four seasons. Ted was supposed to go through a flop era, where he'd be checked out and his divorce and overall shitty situation with Michelle (the therapist thing) would have bitten him in the ass, and he'd struggle with his own positivity. It's crucial for Ted as a character to be critical of his life in Kansas, otherwise his character doesn't do anything but serve as an enlightened american spiritual guide to a bunch of brits (NOT a classy plot line and not a good move, especially since most of the brits are either queer or poc). I swear to god, if they make Ted go back to Kansas and end the series with him returning to the status-quo, I'll riot. His story was clearly about trying something new and brave for the wrong reasons, and finding himself in the process! He was not happy in Kansas! He has built himself a life in England that he never had in Kansas (otherwise we'd see him missing his friends, not the never-ending loneliness).

But it's a season long arc, and a recovery process that would last them another season. I was sure they would stop after the fourth season, not the third!

I think they might have decided to wrap it up early, either because of the impending strike, or because Sudeikis got bored.

Sudeikis has come out and said (on a couple of occasions I believe) that the show was pitched as a three season arc, not four. However, as a fellow writer who always needs about 75% more time/space than she originally planned for a story, I can easily picture how a perceived three season arc could actually need four seasons once you're in the nitty-gritty of writing it. I also don't know enough about the inner workings of Apple TV and Sudeikis' creative process to guess at how everyone was originally conceiving a "season." Certainly the 7-10 episodes of today are a far different beast from the 24 episodes of decades past. If Ted Lasso was still three seasons but with season 3 clocking in at 19 episodes... that would make a hell of a difference.

Regardless, I do think this season needed more time and that the issues there are seen more clearly in "International Break" than anywhere else. Nate quitting his job from one episode to the next, Rebecca suddenly being able to laugh uproariously with Rupert, even Roy having this 'aha' moment about being with Keeley... it's not that I think the show hasn't been building towards these things (it has), but rather that the final push feels sudden and, though not out of nowhere, not what I was expecting to happen just yet if - as said - the show had more time to develop these complex moments of growth. Also, though I'm a big fan of the show's sprawling cast and I think that's integral to its overall messages (you need that diversity in characters and their relationships), there was a lot of 'filler' I think this season could have cut to better focus on those key dynamics. For me, Keeley is the most egregious example in that regard. Shandi and Jack added little to her story imo - beyond a without-a-doubt queer confirmation and a little growth in terms of being a boss - so I would have rather had more of the focus be around Roy and her company more broadly.

Anyway, yeah, HARD agree about Kansas. I've already written about how disappointed I'd be in that ending. Personally, I don't think I'd want a whole season of Ted's "flop era," especially since that's where he started out: the presumably useless American "wanker" who is driving the team into the dirt. The shorter arc we got this season where Ted struggles, doubts, and then makes a tremendous comeback worked well for me. What would I have given Ted instead to fill that time... I'm not sure, which is one of the reasons why I think the show does benefit from that three season structure. There's only so much you can do with the concept of "Presumed failure is not a failure after all and actually is supper successful" before you're forced to backtrack (which undermines the message) or just sit in the boring "They're great aren't they great everything is great" ending. So Ted's football arc works for me, we just need more time for all those relationships. Keep the basic structure we have in terms of overall plot, but add in episodes to fully take the characters through the conflicts Season 2 introduced: How does Nate possibly redeem himself in Rupert's clutches? How can Ted come to terms with Michele dating their therapist? Why is Beard still 'happily' dating Jane after Higgins' intervention and his violent night out? How does Roy overcome this all-consuming belief that he's holding Keeley back? What in the world is going on with Rebecca and this maybe baby? How is Trent going to confess his love for Ted?

As said, the season IS answering all these questions, it just feels like the short structure has landed us with, "This is a problem, this is a problem, this is still a problem, the characters are acknowledging it's a problem... oh look the problem is now solved off-screen/in one scene! Happy days."

[masterthespianduchovny]

I do not dislike Michelle Keller, formerly Michelle Lasso, but I do dislike how the series and most fans either refuse to criticize her or defend her.

I understand that fans, esp women, are compelled to defend Michelle because she’s a woman and women are overly criticized and dragged unnecessarily at times. I get that. However, there would be think pieces about Michelle is she were Michael. And I truly hate this current trend of pretending everything is different when it’s a woman involved.

It’s quite strange how people are so sad for Ted being made to feel like he’s too much—hmm, I wonder who made him feel that way—and are rooting for him to have a happy ending with someone who accepts him as he is. Then when you directly criticize Michelle, it’s a ton of excuses about how separation/divorce is hard, Ted wouldn’t be transparent with her, and so forth.

While this is true, intentionally or not, Michelle still hurt Ted in a major way. And, I don’t know about you all, but I believe you should still apologize for hurting someone even if it wasn’t intentional.

Michelle became short tempered with him and had an issue whenever he tried to do things for her. While her reaction wasn’t malicious, there’s nothing wrong with, “hey, I know you meant well. I just—it’s hard being around you and having this life with you when I don’t even feel like I know you. I shouldn’t have lashed out. You didn’t deserve that.”

Boom!

This NEVER happens.

Michelle never has to take any accountability for the things she’s down, which we know has a major effect on Ted. Essentially, people are arguing he deserved that treatment all while saying, “poor Ted.”

Michelle making Ted feel bad for saying “I love you.” I understand Michelle was going through her own shit, but Christ! Would we defending her if the genders were switched? I’ll need to rewatch the episode to really dig into that, but it felt unnecessarily cruel even if she didn’t intend for it to be so.

Someone will correct me on this, but Michelle and ted separate in February and by March of that same year she’s pushing for ted to sign divorce papers. It’s not like he’s a busy man or anything??? Literally most divorces, esp considering how long they’d been married, take a while to happen. Ted fucking granted her the divorce without her even asking and was kind about the entire thing and Michelle is pushing for a divorce within the month.

Is that not strange?

I honestly think this was just a bad writing choice, but my God, I can’t imagine the discourse if Ted was a woman—Thea. And how “Michael” would be dragged for that and people speculating that either they were cheating or wanted to be with new and different women. Not even accounting for how some would relate to “Thea” and how their ex did them dirty.

But again, we can’t talk about that. No matter how fucked up that was, NOPE!

And this recent shit. I don’t even know.

I don’t know if it’s a case of poor writing or not because I don’t think the series is going to go there. Meaning I don’t think the series is going to say Dr. Jacobs groomed Michelle. But let’s keep in mind that he was her therapist originally, and then their marriage counselor. He was the one who fueled Ted’s dislike of therapists and always sided with Michelle. I don’t think Ted even felt like he could be heard.

When Dr. Jacobs realizes it’s Ted, he freezes as if being caught. As if he was cheating with Michelle. Even Michelle is acting suspicious as fuck. There’s no, “I didn’t want him to find out about this, he may take it hard.” It felt like they’d both done something they were supposed to be doing. Both come off as guilty as hell.

Do I think the actually had an affair?

No.

Or maybe it was an emotional affair.

But people love to skip over the shit Michelle does (or inadvertently blame Ted) and it’s fucking annoying. Not necessarily because they don’t pay attention to her, but because the discussion around her behavior when they actually engage with it is either brushing off what she does or defending it.