#i think im going to combine what i was originally going to do for 14 and 15

[maaaxx]

one of the most annoying things about writing is that sometimes the solution to a miserably dull chapter/portion of the story is to delete everything and start over from scratch.

[giraffeter]

Hi again ^^

Thank you for that delicious ArmKhun headcanon answer. I have an immediate follow-up ask. You mentioned that you have vivid background headcanons for all the bodyguards, as if that isn't a massive tease. Any details you'd be willing to spill? 👀

Haha I suppose that was a bit of a tease! Your asks keep making my DAY, I will happily talk about these boys all day every day.

OK, the Giraffeter Bodyguard Backstory Headcanons are:

Big: I alluded to some of this in Gonna Fade You Like That Rush, but in my mind Big is the son of one of Korn's lieutenants — his dad works for Korn, his grandfather worked for Korn's father, the families go back. We know that he's one of Korn's hand-raised bodyguards and that he and Kinn grew up together; I think Korn would not be interested in caring for a bunch of additional children, so my headcanon is that his hand-raised boys stay with their families of origin until they've completed their mandatory schooling, which in Thailand is through Grade 9 — Big would be 14 or 15 when he came to the main family house and began his training. Big is the younger son in his family: his older brother will inherit their family's piece of the Theerapanyakul criminal empire, and Big's been marked for Kinn for basically his whole life. Even before Tankhun's abduction, Big belonged to Kinn. He met Kinn for the first time when he was about 12 and Kinn was 15 or so — Kinn was the coolest Cool Older Teen Big had ever laid eyes on. He smiled that devastating smile at Big and talked to him about video games or something and Big plunged headfirst into a fealty kink that would last the rest of his brief life.

Ken: As much as I have read and enjoyed many fics shipping Ken with various other male characters, my favorite headcanon for Ken is that he is the "token straight" in the main family house, and as such is relatively immune to the psychosexual shenanigans taking place on all sides of him. He's from a fairly well-off family — he grew up in Thailand but went to an international school, and he went to college in Australia. He was a competitive swimmer all through high school and college, which is why the "nice one, loser" moment cuts so deep. He has that very dangerous trait of "smart but not as smart as he thinks he is" in addition to being pretty greedy and amoral, so my headcanon is that he was boosting cars or some shit and stole the wrong car. Chan gave him a choice of "well-paying job for life or bullet in the head right now" and he happily chose the former. He thought working for the mob would be a lot more glamorous and exciting than it turned out to be; that, combined with aforementioned unwarranted self-confidence and greed, was what made it so easy for Gun to turn him.

Arm: I covered this in my answer to your delightful previous ask so I'll be brief here, but my headcanon is that Arm is ex-military and a trained field medic, and has some experience being around PTSD.

Pete: Pete is another one where we actually do know a bit about his backstory: the abusive father, the loving grandma, the complicated relationship to food, the history as a boxer. I don't understand Thai well enough to verify this but when Pete says "boxing" I assume he means muay thai. Pete is a real country boy, and I think he didn't spend much time in Bangkok before he came to work for Korn. I think he dealt with some food insecurity as a kid, from a combination of his dad not having much money and also just not being around much to feed him — I think his grandma (who I think he calls ยาย meaning she's his mom's mom?) took care to feed him up as much as she could when he visited her. My headcanon is that Korn straight-up bought Pete, either for cash after seeing him fight or as payment for a gambling debt his dad owed Korn's organization.

Pol: I think Pol was another one of Korn's hand-raised bunch, although his background is different from Big's. I don't think his parents are directly involved in the criminal underworld in the way I imagine Big's as being; instead, I think they're just regular working-class people who own a business, maybe a shop or something, that comes under Korn's purview. We've seen that the Theerapanyakul empire contains as many legitimate enterprises (bread company!) as illegitimate, and we know a lot of their money comes from real estate, so it might be as simple as Korn being Pol's family's landlord. Maybe they've been tenants of his for a long time, since his dad was still in charge; maybe they were part of the first territory he controlled while he was working his way up. At any rate, at some point when Pol was growing up Korn said "I have a job for your son if he wants it;" now Pol lives in the fancy house, has nice clothes and all his meals provided, and makes more money than his parents do by a long shot. He's the only one of the main bodyguard squad with a good relationship with his family (Pete and his grandma notwithstanding), which is why he's always on the shared phone.

Thanks for the ask! It was fun to write all this out after carrying it in my head for so long!

[macbethz]

ok final thots. thank you to those who supported me liveblogging both those episodes i love doctor who so much. i also unfortunately love being a critic

all three dw episodes seem to be engaging heavily in this new folklore-ish lean that was established in wild blue yonder - the goblin stealing children, the bogeyman, the fiddle battle with the devil. im interested to see where it goes bc i think its a compelling throughline and one thing rtd lovessss is creating episodic stories that resolve into an overarching narrative. I do think DW seems to be pivoting towards its more family-centric roots, which is fine i guess. I am aware im not the target audience of doctor who but i do love her for her darker moments so ill always be a little sad

i think its kind of funny that the bbc lied in their marketing a little? like space babies was not about the first 5 second butterfly thing and the beatles were barely in the devils chord. actually really funny i literally cant be mad

ncuti is literally electrifying every time hes on camera. i believe he's the doctor 10000% and he really brings that combination of whimsy and sadness to the role that makes me want to see more of 15. ruby i find....less compelling. at least as of rn. I think the main point of interest for her is the mystery of her origin but as a character she's kind of a non-entity in the same way i found many of 13s companions. she almost reminds me of early season Clara in that she's just kinda Mystery Twee Girl but Clara ended up as one of my favorites because she became the most sick and twisted woman on planet earth over the course of 3 beautiful seasons so I have not lost hope yet.

However I do think the companion-doctor relationship is the thing the entire show runs on and I'm not, AS OF YET, super compelled by what 15 and ruby have going on. Hitting a lot of the same notes as rose/9 without the emotional follow-through and DISAGREEMENTS that really made that relationship interesting to watch. I think that's the main thing is I need to see some kind of conflict. 15 is a lot more open than any previous doctor by a LONG shot, presumably because of 14s off-screen therapy LMAO. There's a lot on the table up front in terms of backstory and personality (which i get helps set up new fans) but that also means a lot of the narrative tension created by that kind of inside information is lost. We need something else to replace it and make that dynamic interesting! For me doctor who maintains its narrative momentum through character relationships, i'm not particularly interested in just seeing Space Adventures without that kind of meat behind it idk. it makes them feel a little hollow to me

what else um. jinkx monsoon ate obviously. music is the meaning of life thank you for acknowledging this doctor who.

[getallemeralds]

re: max blorboposting:

unsurprisingly, I Would Like To See It (dont worry if not! no pressure)

time for some very delayed blorboposting. i hope everybody's ready to learn about blaseball

this is Wyatt Mason X, aka MaX:

and xe is an echo of the original Wyatt Mason, who was a sub-par batter for the LA Tacos until they picked up a Microphone that broke reality, wiped them from existence, and gave them godlike power on Twitter. (look blaseball plot is hard to summarize im doing my best here). after the Microphone broke 11 seasons later, 14* copies of Wyatt appeared on a bunch of teams and basically had a "uh. what now?" moment. and then most of them also got wiped out of existence when coming into contact with the other Wyatts under specific circumstances.

*(site-canonically 13 but vix is real in our hearts)

xe is my favourite blaseball player, the first one i contributed lore to, the one i rp'd on twitter for a year, and the one i will gush about when given the opportunity. so below the cut is a LOT of words.

an important thing about the Big Garage's sound system is that we did some shit to it. we're the music team, we do band stuff, and we also do sound-based necromancy. so a teenager that is literally an echo of somebody turned into a person getting stuck in our sound system.. does things! like mess with the whole "coming into existence" part. the physicality of the other Wyatts varies but MaX has the fun property of only kinda being solid? xe's very visually glitchy, sometimes clips through objects, may not have actual flesh, and xer bone status is undefined. if you go off the idea that a Wyatt echo has a sound-based core (the "echo" part of an echo) and then a squishy human exterior, MaX is kinda.. lacking in the squishy human exterior part.

xe doesn't really have many memories of the original Wyatt (the way i write xem, xe only remembers bits and pieces from having the Microphone), so that combined with being "incomplete" and the fact that being an echo means xe can echo others means that xer identity is a patchwork of everyone around xem. verbal tics, gestures, batting stance, opinions and feelings, fashion sense-- all of it is collected from the rest of the team and patched together until it becomes a person. xe's a quilt of everyone else.

that doesn't really stop xem, though (and in fact enables xem), although sometimes it can be a bit of a downer if xe thinks about it too much. xe's kinda prone to getting stuck in xer own head about xer existence, because it is very, very impermanent. if xe encounters another Wyatt in the wrong kind of weather, xe'll just.. be gone. echo away into static. like what happened to almost everyone else. so at first, a lot of xer everything was xem facing the idea of, like, a predetermined ending. that xe's not gonna make it out of this alive, that xe needs to make the most of the time xe does have, and that-- more than anything-- xe needs to figure out who xe is as someone besides just the tenth Wyatt Mason. and it's rough when xe wakes up at the start of each season not knowing if xe's gonna be there at the end of it.

the thing is, 10 seasons later, at the end of the era, MaX was still alive.

xe's not the only one, even! Ivy (IV) and NaN (what's left of the original Wyatt) made it through too. everyone else staticked out (including Wyatt Quitter, who wasn't an echo originally but got turned into one because the Microphone's influence isn't always a good thing), but those three made it out. MaX, who'd gained a reputation for not wanting to play because of racking up status effects that'd take xem out of the game, returned to the plate in the last week of the season to see the world collapse. but xe survived. literally no one thought xe would! i didn't think xe would! i mean, i was hoping for it, but i was still bracing for it, y'know

and so, at the end of everything, this punk teen makes it to the end of the world. some of xer friends have died (Chorby Soul, who xe bonded with about being on a timer to death/nonexistence, and Sparks Beans, who went up in flames before xe went up to bat) or got Vaulted (Jaybot, because man do these two Relate to each other about being copies of famous players that don't quite measure up or want to be seen as them, and also Chorby again), but xe made it.

i drew this at the end of the season to celebrate. it felt unreal, y'know? these three are like. dysfunctional siblings. they love each other even if they can rarely meet. MaX and Ivy especially are inseparable, and if i started talking about MaX and NaN this would go on for even more miles than it already is

there's just.. really something about a character that goes into things knowing their time is limited, that maybe even their death is a good thing (because a common theory was that if all the Wyatts went static, the Microphone would come back - gamma delta please fish up etc etc), but still survives. especially when xe spends the entire time trying to figure out who xe is compared to the original Wyatt Mason and decides on a unique name, unique pronouns, a unique sense of self that's still somewhat rooted in having once been Wyatt but is transformative and something entirely xer own. xe survived long enough to make friends, to form a family, to gain a name for xemself beyond being just another Wyatt Mason due to fade.

the universe is gone. the universe returns. players start to fall. Ivy and NaN are among the first that tumble back into reality and back onto new teams to begin play again. once again, they've made it. they're in the first fall! they're the first members of their new teams! they're safe, and okay, and they've got each other, and maybe MaX didn't fall with them but there's always next week.

and next week.

and next week.

and...

well. blaseball starts back up again in a couple days. the rosters are finalized. MaX didn't fall. xe survived til the end of the era, but.. that's it. we don't know where xe is, or what happened to xem (or everyone else still in the black hole). at least if xe went static there would be theatrics. this is just.. nothing. an empty conclusion. just like how we never found out what happened to the original Wyatt. (knowing how i wrote xem on twitter, xe'd probably find some bitter irony in that.)

i'm still holding out hope, though. NaN and Ivy are okay, so MaX will be too in some form. and the thing is, when you're living audio that got pulled out of the sound system by a punk band that's a tight-knit family, when the feedback storms pick up and things start resonating, when you're wired in enough to be a part of not just the band or the team but also the stadium itself, i don't think it's that easy to get rid of xem. this is very much personal headcanon i'm holding onto to try and have some kind of conclusion, but xe's still around in there, i think. maybe not as whole as xe once was, maybe just as an echo of an echo, but it's still something.

it's like.. i dunno. during the expansion era i spent a lot of time panicking over the schedule and checking the various ways MaX could end up in danger and panicking over what other teams did and staying up way too late and generally running myself ragged. which was miserable for me. and on one hand, MaX not being in the game anymore means i don't have the obligation to do that anymore, and also "not having to play but still getting to hang out with xer friends" is MaX's ideal state i think. (except i do still think xe wants to play, xe'd just.. rather be playing baseball than blaseball.) on the other hand, i'm going to miss xem a lot, and it's one thing to be braced for "okay, this is the season xe's gonna static" and another thing to be waiting for xem to fall after seeing xer siblings fall on week 1 and then there's just, like, nothing.

i've thought about writing fall ball MaX fic. i mean, as you can see i have a lot of emotions about it. january's a bit of a rough month for me, though, and i'm already writing something i promised myself i'd write years ago (and trying to nudge myself into drawing bc i have Things I Need To Do), so i don't know if i will. but i can at least ramble incoherently about xem on tumblr i guess.

[absolutelyinlove]

let's talk: canon events! how'd you get into the dream team? what brought you to dtblr?

oh god ok my like. origin story of how i started watching dteam is insanely convoluted so i’m going to put it under the cut and like. to preface i just need u to know i’ve never been normal about anything in my life like i am so completely incapable of having passive interests. that is really crucial to understand

ok. So. basically i’ve always been super into mcyt content, i was a Massive cube smp + cube uhc stan back when that was a thing, i was like. 12-14 at the time but i was on stan twitter, wrote rpf on wattpad, experienced the severe trauma of ccs i wrote about Finding my fic and talking about it very publicly. The whole experience. and then when cube smp started to die my overall mcyt interest heavily faded, i’ve still always been incredibly fixated on minecraft itself i used to be super into uhc and other competitive gamemodes but in terms of actually watching content creators that was like. something that kinda faded in and out i’d go through long phases of watching nothing at all sometimes for entire years then randomly get slapped by nostalgia and fall back into it and rewatch old series’, etc.

but anyway. i had other interests, i had a different main fandom, i was still on stan twitter (kpop twitter to be specific) when dream rly started blowing up and. All i ever heard abt him was negative. because i was. on kpop twitter where like everyone was just excited there was a New Most Hated Fandom on the internet so he was an extremely common punching bag and i just Solely knew of him in a negative light and i’d never actually watched him to form my own opinions because (and this sounds so absurd) i also had this very irrational Jealousy toward the like. “new wave” of mcyt stans in 2019-2020 because suddenly it was a COMMON mainstream fandom and it ABSOLUTELY WASNT back when /i/ was a teenager and at my peak obsession so therefore all i felt was very misplaced dislike because How come this massive fanbase wasn’t around when this was My interest ? anyway.

Then like. sometime still in 2020 ? my irl friend sent me a manhunt and was like u NEED to watch this (because all my irls know i am. Very abnormal about competitive minecraft content) and i was like. Huh is it time for me to finally watch this dream guy. and i watched it and well it was very inevitable i got hooked because manhunt is soooo comedically perfect in terms of how me-catered it is, it is Literally everything i could ever ask for in terms of youtube content so it was absolutely over for me and i binged the entire series over the course of like. a week. and at first i really did think i would just be a passive youtube fan, because again. all i’d ever heard about dream was that he was a Bad Person and therefore i really did Try not to get invested beyond just thinking the videos were good but ofc as soon as i finished watching every manhunt that was out at the time i moved onto other dteam videos and i just fell reallyyyyy really in love with their dynamic and it was like. MAN! i had to accept i was growing attached and i Wanted to know more abt them at this point. i watched every single video on dream’s channel by the time i accepted Okay im in too deep now i want to know more.

this is the part that is going to make me sound incredibly fuckin g crazy so i need u to just hear me out. so i started googling dream and looking at the dsmp wiki (because as a youtube-only viewer i knew Nothing about dsmp other than people on my side of twitter hating it) and i was so surprised to realize hbomb was a member i’m crying because i knew him from CUBE SMP!!!!!!! i was like whta the fuck. now i feel Obligated to care like this is my Past combining with the present… it’s like fate… so then. naturally. i Looked up like. Reasons Dream Is Problematic threads on twitter. because i was like if im going to do this i need to know what exactly i am going into here i want to know why this dude is so hated and i unironically went through every single thread and callout post i could find, looking at Every reason someone gave for hating him then looking up the original clip with full context and watching it for myself so i could make my own judgement of it and also looking into how he responded and that was how i realized Oh like 87% of this is exaggerated and the stuff that’s true is either kind of nothing or he seems to be trying to do better. And that was how i decided. He is just some guy who seems very well-meaning and is making efforts to Grow and Now i can allow myself to . watch his stream vods? i know ho w crazy this sounds im crying but u need to understand i genuinely waited to watch any vods and grow attached to his content in a non-casual way until after i was SURE no secret horrible misdeeds were going to catch me off guard and i’d realize i didn’t actually want to support him i’m fucking crying

and then naturally ijust got incredibly fixated on mcc when i discovered That and that was what led me to watching a ton of other streamers, i was never super into dsmp but i Did get very into watching non-lore dsmp vods and just. tons of vods in general. i got severely fixated on mcsr around this time too which was awesome until it Wasn’t and i made a lurker account on twitter like literally a priv with 0 followers where i only followed ccs because i didn’t want to follow them from my acct with all my kpoptwt mutuals and get Called a freak for supporting dream. i also kept up very closely with any drama/situations involving dream even before being on dttwt in any capacity because again. i just like to have full context for everything so this was like. when i was unfortunately a very active dwt2 user because that was mostly how i stayed in the loop with things and tbf at the time it was actually a pretty good place for nuanced discussion this was before it got terribly unbearable but. Yeah. i started reading heat waves “ironically” while it was ongoing like i was reading it bookclub-style with my dranti friends and pretending i knew nothing abt dream or george outside the context of the fic (I AM TERRIBLE) but i ended up getting curious about what other fics were out there and that was how i started reading dnf earnestly.

i didn’t start writing until wayyyyy later after i came out of the dream stan closet to my friend reyna (still the only one of my kpoptwt-era friends who knows i am. the way that i am) in like. mid 2021? and i got them invested in dteam too and then in december 2021 we made our ao3s + new twitter accts together and both started writing fics

as for dtblr in specific i am relatively new here i guess ! i have been a long time lurker as i’ve always preferred tumblr for fandom discussion compared to twitter but i was always too shy to actually make my own account andddd because i started on twitter and had exclusively used twitter in my previous fandom it just like. Came more naturally to me and it’s so good for fic promo i just. Accepted it. but then after october several of my friends and like at least half of my mutuals at the time all became antis and once i was back to feeling. normal about consuming fandom content in like late october early november i desperately wanted to have a place where i wasn’t being made to feel GUILTY constantly so i finally made an acct over here so i’d have at least one space where i could Talk Freely about fandom things without expecting 10 people to tell me to kms for it. (don’t worry i eventually did finally make a new priv and i’m no longer held hostage by ex-stan mutuals on twitter but it was ROUGH at the time like so many of my friends have told me they assumed i’d just lost most of my interest and was only still in the fandom for the sake of writing because i never talked abt anything anymore for so long IT WAS BAD I JUST FELT SILENCED but im free now i promise) so yeah.

but don’t worry now i am here less out of “i have nowhere else to go” necessity and actually just because i Do enjoy it and i prefer it immensely to maintwt i am so content now with basically solely talking abt fandom things here and on my privtwt and just using main for fic talk life is beautiful !

sorry this is really fucking absurdly long i am so normal

[alextblue]

I posted 2,850 times in 2022

That's 86 more posts than 2021!

5 posts created (0%)

2,845 posts reblogged (100%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@shtish

@laurawatchesthebees

@lennyjamin

@artoodeeblue

@spacemanrhys

I tagged 413 of my posts in 2022

#ofmd - 59 posts

#ref - 33 posts

#the sandman - 28 posts

#alex's for later pile - 22 posts

#friend art - 19 posts

#sandman - 17 posts

#moon knight - 17 posts

#our flag means death - 17 posts

#blackbeard - 14 posts

#ed teach - 14 posts

Longest Tag: 111 characters

#though i'm starting to get worried that im damaging my sight with overuse of screens and reading in the dark 😅

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

oooh, 4 and 8!!!

4. what does your room smell like?

It smell like crisps and mint (though it smells a bit stale rn cause i just came back from a trip)

8. what color do you think goes best with your personality?

Well blue is the obvious 😅 but i think a combination of sky blue and bright orange fits

Obscure ask

1 note - Posted May 3, 2022

#4

I have a question..... If you could have any snack in the world, what would you get atm?

Rn i'm craving the Bifi dried sausages (specifically the original one)

1 note - Posted May 3, 2022

#3

Precious bean ofc

awww that's so sweet!!! 🥺

1 note - Posted May 3, 2022

#2

5, 11 and 27!!!

5. favorite form of potato?

hmm this is a tough one because I love potatoes a lot, in most forms. I think my top one is roast potatoes (in quarters-ish) with the skin on and seasoned with 'herbes de Provence', garlic and salt. My mum used to make them all the time when I lived in the south of France so I think there is a nostalgic aspect too

11. anything from your childhood you’ve held on to?

I've kept a bunch of stuff from when I was a kid in boxes in storage. The one thing I've brought with me to uni though is a set of post it notes that my best friend ages 7-14 got me (it's pretty much this one, and though I don't really use the sticky notes I take it with me every time I move)

27. what’s your favourite or go-to outfit?

this changes regularly. At the moment, I'm quite fond of a set of denim overalls/dungarees (from Monki) and I'll wear that with these really comfortable and soft cotton T-shirts (from Uniqlo) and I'll usually wear my Geox boots (they have a water-resistant/warm winter lining so perfect for Dutch weather)

questions from weirdly specific and unrelated asks to know someone well

2 notes - Posted June 9, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

3, 6, 39?

3. what movie/game/etc. helps you calm down? 

I’d have to say my favourite game to chill out is a logic puzzle game, it’s called picross/nonogram or logimage in french. It has become a bit like muscle memory/automatic logic over time, and it’s nice cause I can listen to podcasts at the same time and it doesn’t bother me (numbers and words don’t interfere with each other for me much)

6. what kind of music would you listen to if you could only choose one?

Hmm, I’d say whatever Hozier is categorised as? (Fleet foxes, the crane wives, the amazing devil... that kind of stuff)

39. earbuds or headphones?

Headphones for sure! I really struggle with audio processing so having the dampening of the outside helps a lot, though I have to say that earbuds are more practical to bring with me on outings.

Obscure asks

2 notes - Posted May 3, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[dickpuncher420]

fic writer review

tagged by @chitsangenthusiast thank u kath <33

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

23! which is. so crazy to me?? no way i’ve written that many stories lmao

2. what’s your total ao3 word count?

144,536 (also like half of that is from this past year alone LMAO??)

3. how many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

only 3: atla, daughter of smoke and bone, and leviathan. and since 2015 ive only written for atla lol

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

fumbling towards ecstasy

love language

sunday morning

the kind of love (i’ve been dreaming of)

before the storm

5. do you respond to comments, why or why not?

i try to!! i’ve def been slacking recently, and i generally only respond to comments on a new fic for a certain amt of time after it’s been posted. but i like to do it bc i LOVE when fic authors respond to my comments, so i just want to return the favour to other ppl who might feel the same way! :)

6. what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

LMAO i was about to say none and then i remembered as we fade in the dark, which i wrote years and years ago so i just forgot it existed hfhsjs

7. do you write crossovers? if so, what’s the craziest one you’ve written?

nah, not a fan of em

8. have you ever received hate on a fic?

omg YES i got THE funniest comment on victory lap where this person was just SO MAD that sokka was a dick to zuko abt figure skating, calling him toxic and shit akwhdjwhs like i swear they just completely missed the entire point of the fic it was so funny

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

FUCK yeah i do baby. idk if i would say i specifically write a certain kind of smut but i am very fond of writing established relationship sex where they’re just very comfortable w each other and already know each other really well. which is funny bc my most popular fic is a first time sex fic but oh well ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

10. have you ever had a fic stolen?

as far as im aware no

11. have you ever had a fic translated?

nope! i did have fumbling towards ecstasy podficced tho if that’s anything?

12. have you ever co-written a fic before?

yes, once, and tbh i don’t think i’d ever do it again djhsjshs it’s just not rlly my jam

13. what’s your all-time fave ship?

i rlly don’t think it’s that hard to guess LMAO

14. what’s a fic you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

ughh i hesitate to say lover come back bc i am still dead set on finishing it one day but i just haven’t made any real progress on it in so long and just arrfgghhdh it haunts me. i have so much of it written already and i don’t want it all to just go to waste :(

15. what are your writing strengths?

i’d say…dialogue and having my writing feel very physically grounded in the moment. personally, i don’t like to spend a lot of time in that sort of abstract, reflective headspace—i prefer to focus on specific, concrete moments and interactions. i try to bring attention to the sensory side of things to make it feel more tangible

16. what are your writing weaknesses?

both over- and under-editing lol. sometimes i’ll rework a line or passage too much when it was much better off the way i’d originally written it. and sometimes i’m so intent on just getting things done and posting that i don’t spend much time editing at all

17. what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages on a fic?

personally i would never do it myself, and i’m not a huuge fan of it in other fics either. there is one rlly old makorra fic that i love tho that does it and i think it works incredibly well in the specific context that it’s in

18. what was the first fandom you ever wrote for?

leviathan! those books were my first introduction into any kind of fandom stuff, they still hold a special place in my heart

19. what is your favorite fic ever written?

my favourite fic that I’VE ever written is probably victory lap, closely followed by love language. i’m still incredibly proud of both of them, but victory lap wins out in that it was such a huge, daunting project that i never expected to actually complete—and then i smashed out 26k words of the most self-indulgent au i’ve ever written in a little over two weeks and i was like. holy fucking shit. i can’t believe i did that JFHSJSH

also i’m very happy with the way i managed to execute all the stuff about sokka’s feelings and motivations and the struggles of being an athlete. it was just such a fun and fulfilling way to combine two of my biggest interests ^_^

now if we’re talking abt my favourite fic that someone else has written….shit. pls don’t ask me that, i can’t choose >_< i have a favourites tag in my bookmarks for a reason

tagging: @dameferre @goldrushzukka @ofherlionheart @foyal @lesbianvampireboyfriend @quenchyest @zukkababey @badgerfrogzukka

[happikattwuzheere]

was gonna try and do multiple characters in one post but nope! i have too much to say. also the pictures are all different sizes so its rly hard to get the photoset to look appealing, so we’re starting w/ blue. and also a colored pic of what adam looks like when he’s not a deer. boy’s tryin not to stand out. which goes great up for him right up until it doesn’t. lmao. i’ll talk a bit about him too w/ stuff that didnt get mentioned in the starter post about him and gansey, but this is mostly gonna be about blue. 

SO. 

there’s this fey entity, right? i don’t have a name for them, but they’re not...they didnt START the fey/human conflict, but they are benefiting from it, politically speaking? and when maura was younger, despite other witches being like “girl dont choose sides, we’re witches, we guard boundaries but we don’t choose sides,” was hotheaded and brash and went “ok but fuck that though” and one thing led to another and she ended up getting a curse on her firstborn. Oops. that’s where the kissing curse comes from, here; i’ll get into that much later in a text post probably but gansey’s survivor’s guilt thing doesnt come from him actually dying in this au it’s from something Else, but blue will still kill him if she kisses him, just, for different reasons, it’s an actual curse this time and not something to do with the nature of who they both are. 

her father’s still a tree light, but like, she actually knows that from the outset? because. they live in cabeswater. the tree lights are all around and accept her as one of their own even if she can’t turn into a tree, and as a result of that, she’s got some cool perks. 

a) extremely resistant and/or outright immune to a Lot of fey bullshit 

b) still boosts psychic energies and magical powers like in canon

c) the absolute safest person to be traveling in cabeswater ever, because the forest itself loves her, and also if you mess with her within the borders of cabeswater a bunch of tree lights will physically manifest and be like “hey buddy wanna think twice about that”

but she can’t use magic herself, still, which actually works in the favor of herself and the coven--witchcraft is in a sort of weird spot, culturally, where it’s both feared and often hated, but also understood to at times be necessary, especially by rural peoples like those of the village. im taking a very discworld spin on the witchcraft, because i love discworld and you can’t stop me, and so the attitude is, like. its frightening ancient magic and the church hates it but when there’s an emergency and someone’s on the border between life and death, or something is trying to pass into this world from another, etc etc etc, then you gotta suck it up and call on a witch because they’re the only ones who can deal with those things. so. the coven is tolerated, both because it’s too big and powerful to actually fight but also because it’s extremely needed when you live in a village right next door to fey lands. you NEED someone watching the border. however that doesn’t mean anyone wants to be seen publicly talking to a witch--but blue’s not a witch. she’s a witch’s daughter, but she’s not a witch herself, which is a step removed enough that she can go into town and run errands and also people will maybe pull her discretely aside and tell her if something’s coming up that the coven should know about, and it all works very neatly with her acting as a sort of liaison. very important role she plays, which is why gansey tries talking to her after his initial attempt to speak with the coven directly fails. 

speaking of the coven itself: i’ve been calling it the fox way coven, even tho it probably wouldn’t be called that because there’s no road called fox way that the coven is built on, it’s a big magic house out in the fairy forest, BUT they do have a fox theme because i love foxes and this is a gift i have been given. if people have familiars in this coven, they’re foxes rather than cats, because as wonderful as cats are u cant have them and foxes in the same house that will go bad. but also there’s a v small number of them, like maybe three or four total out of the much higher number of women living there, who are fey blooded like adam, but who become foxes rather than adam’s deer. persephone is one of these! (it’s worth noting the reason why they become the same animal is because of a combination of coincidence, intentional theming, and mostly just because like, virtually all of the residents there aside from persephone are related to either maura or calla) 

anyway the point is, because of this, blue’d seen enough feyblood transformations that when, one day when she was 9 or 10, on a visit to town, she saw the most distressed, disoriented fawn wobbling around frantically and was able to very quickly recognize that that was, in fact, a person who had probably turned into a deer for the first time, and responded by very calmly informing him that she knew who could help and leading him home. this is where those last two pictures come from, and how adam’s apprenticeship started. 

like, there was a lot of arguing from the witches immediately--of course we’re going to teach him how to become human again but we aren’t really going to take him on in the coven are we? he’s a boy, he’s some local kid we know nothing about, what happened to keeping it in the family, he’s the wrong animal and we’ve got a whole thing going on--at which point persephone parted everyone like the red sea, took one look at adam, went “mine now” and despite a lot of grumbling that was the end of it. she took him on a bit of a tour of cabeswater a few days later, after he’d had time to think it over, and he felt so drawn to the forest that he agreed to the apprenticeship.

so he’s technically persephone’s apprentice but like in actual practice he’s being taught by the entire coven lmao, ANYWAY

adam being adam also had a backup plan for trying to get out of the village--even at ten he figured witchcraft might be a first way out of there, he was already thinking about it, but by thirteen when the good ole abuse started (and at which point the last whispers of dissent died out very quickly amongst the coven, nope, adam is one of us now, do you want us to very threateningly hang out in your front yard sometime because we can do that--what do you mean no, let us do this,) he was also like. i dont think this is a guarantee of getting out of here i need a second job. and the thing is, as was mentioned in the original post, the fey blood also means adam’s got issues with iron; it’ll poison him if he’s stabbed with it but it also reacts to his skin touching it like a hot stove. he’s fine if there’s a layer between his skin and the iron, but if he touches it directly, it’s Bad. so ofc this headstrong idiot takes an open spot a t a metalworker’s in the village because adam is the king of making bad decisions. the witches have a betting pool on how long it’ll take him to out himself. “its fine i’ll wear gloves,” he says. “it’s the perfect disguise no one will expect someone with fey connections to work near so much iron,” he says. “i have everything perfectly under control,” he says.

anyway he totally forgets to wear gloves before grabbing an iron tool while his dad and his boss are both in the store and in clear view of him and that’s why he was getting chased by hunters when gansey rescued him 

also he and blue tried dating when they were like 13-14 and it ended about as badly as in canon and they made up later and by the time the story starts they’ve settled into very much being weird siblings. adam starts hanging out with gansey initially to try and basically spy on him, figure out why he’s here, but ends up rly liking the guy and deciding his reasons are sincerely to try and help people, and he tells this to blue who starts immediately accusing him of having a crush on the lordling and being a class traitor, because she does NOT like gansey at this point and really the nobility all prefer wizards to witches which is a stupid idiot decision and frankly the fact that this lordling is apparently enamored by some random deer is hilarious to her, but even moreso is the fact that adam actually defends the lordling to her, like, “wow adam its hilarious that the lordling’s friend thinks that you have charmed the lordling because from my perspective it looks the other way around” “shut uuuup you’re not listening im serious, like, yeah ok he put his foot in his mouth really hard when he talked to you but im telling you i dont think the whole i-wanna-understand thing is an act” “idk if i can trust you through those rose tinted glasses buddy. tell me again about that time he called you princely?” “oh my god” 

this is turning into rambling but. thats the gist of the witches and blue esp thank u for coming if u made it this far here’s a bonus persephone fox 

[seatawinan]

Can you please make a tutorial on how you make your pixel art gifs (love them and btw love your new url too, can't wait for my engineer season 2) ❤️

Hi, here’s a rough tutorial on how to make them:

1. select a gif to make them - preferably, one with very little movement and one where the number of frames doesn’t matter 

2. find a pixel art from the internet (i just google transparent pixel art / stars transparent pixel art, etc...)

3. here’s the base gif - i selected intouch sleeping:

4. i have this pink gif of hearts and other stuff flying up, my idea is to put it coming up from him in the background wall (so the table and the food arent covered). heres the raw gif from the internet

5. group the frames and the coloring so it’s easy to ignore

6. here’s where it gets technical....

The gif of intouch has 61 frames, and my standard timing is 0.06s The gif of the pixel art has 24 frames and the original timing is 0.12s

Here’s what it would look like if you just paste it as is (:

It becomes fast because the pixel art gif will follow the timing of 0.06s (i didn’t bother with resizing and the frame numbers, and other stuff for now, just wanted to show the timing problem here)

i can set the timing of intouch sleeping to 0.12 so the pixel art will move slower, but for some gifs you can’t do that, so it has to be the other way around, we have to make the pixel art adjust

7.  basically, what to do is copy each frame, so from 24 frames it will be 48. select frame 1 then press new frame. The frame 1 copy will be inserted after as frame 2, but it will have the same image as frame 1. kind of like this:

original gif: frame 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6... adjusted gif: frame 1, copy 1, 2, copy 2, 3, copy 3...

it’s boring work i admit, but just click on frame 1, then press New Frame, then click frame 3 (frame 3 was originally frame 2, but the frame 1 copy is now frame 2), press New Frame, etc. basically, just ignore all even frames and select new frame on the odd ones

8. Now I have 48 frames. But the gif of intouch has 61 frames. I can cut intouch gif to 48, but i would rather do this: select all frames from 1 to 48, then copy frames, paste frames (Paste after selection) so it will now be 96 frames. 

Then save it as a new gif. so all the layers will correspond accordingly.

You only have to do this once for each pixel art. Since you saved it as a new gif, the next time you’re going to use the pixel art, you can automatically just go straight to the next part:

9. open the new gif, select frame 1 to 61, go to intouch gif, select frames 1 to 61 , paste frames (paste over selection). 

10. the pixel art doens’t cover it all. i don’t want to enlarge it, because i can just paste another set to cover the remaining area.

below, you can see i grouped it already, hearts 1 group covers the area shown below, hearts 2 covers the remaining right side. i don’t have to resize it, bc i don’t plan to cover the table and the food anyway

11. IMPORTANT: in some cases, you have to resize them, if you are going to paste more than 1 set, resize the first one accordingly, then take note of the percentage resizing so you can apply the same size to the second set you will paste. 

IMPORTANT 2: in some cases, you will have to rotate the image. i suggest resize it first to roughly the size you want, then slowly rotate it. if it doens’t fit, undo and rotate again. This is because the pixel art boundaries (shown in the previous image) change when you rotate the gif so it will now include more area

here’s another way of thinking it: the gif below has stars coming diagonally from the upper right to the lower left. If I slowly rotate it, i can match the upper right corner (where the stars are coming from) to where I want to place it 

12. i grouped both hearts 1 and hearts 2 into a bigger group

13. Now for layer mask: select the lasso tool, and check feather 5 pixel, and draw the outline of intouch sleeping then right click select inverse

14. select the hearts group, then click the layer mask icon below:

15. it should look like this:

the black area is where the pixel art doesn’t appear, the white area is where is appears.

16. pray it works. and here is the final product:

EXTRA: 

For the image below, i set one layer mask for each frame. this was okay to do (it was only 20 frames). This is also an example of keeping the original gif timing

For my bb phukong, i wanted the stars to come from his hands, so i rotated each image from the original pixel art so that the upper right box corner fits with his hand (if you rotate afterwards, the box thingy will change and you can no longer find the upper right box im talking about). it’s hard to explain sorry..

There you have it! i hope this helps, and you can always ask for advice and stuff. There are endless combinations you can come up with! 

Once you get the hang of it, it will be easy, I can now do this while watching something in the background. Plus, you only need to do the copy frame method once for that pixel art, the next time you use the pixel art, you can easily just paste frames

[ggukkiedae]

- 𝘁𝗮𝗴 𝗴𝗮𝗺𝗲: the interview

Tagged by: @ateez-elena thanks daisy 🥰 luv this aksjdhdbdn

1. Why did you choose your url?

weeeell it’s a combination of jungkook and daehwi bc i was going through it for then at the time

2. Any side blogs? If you have them, name them and why you have them?

i do but i don’t use them? ggukkiedaerecs for recs, ggukkiedaeau for my writing that isn’t about my ocs (i had a plan for the dreamies aksjjdf it’s called crush chronicles but i kinda just left her in the drafts) aaaand ggukkiedaeblogs to rb stuff

3. How long have you been on Tumblr?

four years now? yeah but i’ve only been active here for like 1 and a half

4. Do you have a queue tag?

uhhhhh what’s this? akshdhf

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?

originally this was bimiltokki where i’d rant about secrets aksjdjf if you scroll back far enough you’ll see me ranting about my old crush but now my accs for my ocs!

6. Why did you choose your icon / pfp?

bc i love han jisung and that’s that 🥰

7. Why did you choose your header?

idk it was cute and i like fairylights

8. What’s your post with the most notes?

uhhhhhh odd one out had 74 notes i think?

9. How many mutuals do you have?

not that much but i love them and support them im just really bad with starting conversations but hi moots! i’m supporting you from here 💖

10. How many followers do you have?

640 and i’m still so shookt aksjdhf thanks for caring about my ocs guys 💖💖💖💖💖

11. How many people do you follow?

116 mostly my moots, update accs, a few other non-kpop related accs as well just because 😊

12. Have you ever made a shitpost?

i... i don’t think so?

13. How often do you use Tumblr each day?

i’m here quite often actually aksjdhf i lurk when i have no ideas or when i’m too stressed out over school work

14. Did you have a fight / argument with another blog once? Who won?

i don’t think i have? someone once reported someone copying hannah buuuut i don’t think i really engaged in that mostly bc i’m babie and can’t do confrontation, partially bc they never gave me the url aksjdhf

15. How do you feel about ‘you need to compare this’ posts?

uhhhhhh compare what???

16. Do you like tag games?

yupp! they’re fun 🥰

17. Do you like ask games?

very much yes, i’ve been wanting to try but i’m shy akshdhd

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is Tumblr famous?

all my oc creator moots!!! honestly they’re all so good with what they do that’s why they’re so popular aksjdhfhhd

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?

nopeeesss

Tagging: @1-800-enhypenbibi @multifandom-01 @moondaii @nct-aria @h0neyjaehyun if you guys waaaant

[hongism]

SO here we are at the finish line! i am so so excited to share this two fold project with you all and all the details will be below. thank you again x10000000 for helping me reach this milestone and helping me grow this blog into what it is today. i am so grateful for each and every single one of you. while i know im not able to do something special for every milestone i reach, i want to show my gratitude here and now. 

*•.¸♡ ✧ 𝓅𝒶𝓇𝓉 𝑜𝓃𝑒 ✧ ♡¸.•*

while this may be my milestone, it certainly isn’t all about me. i want to use this opportunity to engage you guys and share the love and appreciation for other writers and content creators.

so part one of my milestone celebration is for you guys.

send me an ask telling me about your favorite creator - whether it be a fic writer, gif maker, media creator, any sort of blog - and tell me why you love them. i will post your asks and tag the creator so that they can know that they are loved and cherished by people. if you want to talk about your favorite creation of theirs, that is fantastic as well. maybe it’s a fic that you think about all the time, a graphic that is absolutely stunning beyond belief, just a fun blog that you love seeing! or it could be a fic you recommend! i’ll try my best to read it asap and leave my feedback for the author, or maybe some of you guys as my followers will check out the fic and leave feedback yourself! feedback is so hugely important to authors and creators on this platform, and i really wanna encourage people to give more!

i really want this part one to be all about spreading love and appreciation, because god knows tumblr creators do NOT get enough of it!

this is open so if you’d like to send love to your favorite creators, please do so!

*•.¸♡ ✧ 𝓅𝒶𝓇𝓉 𝓉𝓌𝑜 ✧ ♡¸.•* 

so this bit will require a lot more information but the whole purpose of this part two is really an ode to you guys. when i started out i would post a reaction here and there but it really was the requests that caused me to grow, especially my request game back in december. that game really propelled me forward in so many ways and i will always be grateful for every single one of you who helped me do that. it’s incredible that i was celebrating a milestone back in december and now im celebrating one that is almost quadruple the amount, and it’s just so crazy unbelievable that i don’t think i’ll ever just recover from the shock and gratitude.

so y’all aren’t here to hear me ramble on and on. i will get straight to the point eep. as an ode to how i started out and how i grew, i will be opening my own drabble request game!

as soon as this post goes live, i will be posting another post of my own prompts with 4 categories: angst, fluff, smut, and miscellaneous. these prompts will be all made by me with the help of some dear friends hehe.

another special part about this idea is that i want to be able to share this game with others obviously. so if you would like to participate with me in doing this - reblog the prompt list that i’ll be posting after this ((i’ll also leave a link here)). specify which group(s) you are accepting requests for and what your own personal guidelines are, or if you are following my guidelines! as you post requests, tag your work with #dreamingofkoomilestone and i will reblog your works!

i couldn’t fit every group i’m including in the banner so that’s why they aren’t all there but be sure to double check the list of groups i will accept requests for in the guidelines below!

i will post the guidelines both here and on the prompt list so you don’t miss out on it but please please please read the guidelines so that i can accept your request. i will also post a prompt list without the guidelines for those who want to participate with me!

in order to request a drabble: 

1-2 members per request

Originally Ateez, BTS, and Stray Kids were going to be the only groups I included in this event but as I got closer and closer to today I was like “hm let’s just have fun with this” so I decided to add two more groups to the mix

Must be either Ateez, BTS, Stray Kids, Victon, or NCT (including WayV)

1-2 prompts per request (if you want more than that, please just send another request)

Can be any combination of prompts from any category (eg: smut 14 + fluff 3)

Can be a combination of members from different groups (eg: Jimin + Bang Chan/Wooyoung+Felix/any other combo you like)

Please be patient with me as these things can take 1-4 days to write and post

I will not write smut for any members of NCT Dream as I do not feel comfortable doing so. Please be aware of this before requesting for anyone from NCT Dream

I reserve the right to deny any request that I do not feel comfortable completing without having to explain why

Follow this format (without the brackets): [Member(s) + Prompt(s) + any other notes you would like to add]

Note: if you are participating in the request event with me, please tag your works with #dreamingofkoomilestone so i can reblog your stuff!

[enthusiasticmusicalquotes]

QUESTION OF THE DAY #6: Send me your most unpopular theatre opinion. Something that might make someone want to fight you. Please don’t be offensive (racist, misogynistic, etc.), but other than that…go as hard as you want. Spill all the tea.

MY ANSWERS: 1) The Pretty Woman score fucking slaps idek, 2) Come From Away (or even Bandstand...) should’ve won the 2017 Best Musical Tony, 3) I prefer the West End Heathers cast album to Off Broadway, 4) Shows shouldn’t sweep the Tonys just because they’re Best Musical worthy...shows that aren’t too critically acclaimed but have really impressive elements should get recognition too.

SUMMARY: Out of 37 responses: 5 were about Dear Evan Hansen, 3 were about Hamilton specifically, 2 were about: Rent, ALW, Wicked, In The Heights, Be More Chill, etc. etc....if your favorite musical is one of these and you get easily offended i wouldn’t read these.

NOTE: I agree with some of these, I highly disagree with others. I do not endorse any of the things that were said, I am simply sharing them with you all. These were what was sent to me. I’m going to number them so if you want to complain about or agree with one you can send me an ask with the number you’re referring to. 

1. howmuchchildrens said: unpopular opinion: i really liked the 2012 version of les mis. i liked russel crowe as javert.

2. Anonymous said: Unpopular opinion: Bootlegs harm to local theatre communities, though I do not believe anyone intends for that to be the case. While it's possible to bootleg responsibly (and I might even say it's beneficial to do so), those who may not know the intricacies of theatrical copyright law or who haven't heard the horror stories from a theatre that's been hit with legal action DUE to a bootleg may record or watch a show irresponsibly, which can greatly harm other routes of theatre accessibility.

3. Anonymous said: Andrew Lloyd Webber musicals are mostly terrible. He only got and stayed popular because a lot of other musical creators and taste makers died in the AIDS epidemic

4. Anonymous said: Almost all musicals using the songs of one artist are cash grabs with no plot or point.

5. Anonymous said: If your musical only has 1 woman OR the women only get sad/romantic songs you need to do something else with your life.

6. nerdshrimp said: Unpopular opinion: Next To Normal does a better job of portraying the effects of mental illness than Dear Evan Hansen does. N2N also doesn't romanticise mental illness & excuse shitty behavior like DEH tries to

7. Anonymous said: Hadestown is a lesser show on Broadway. I fell in love with the live album, and I was so excited for it to come to Broadway. I was so disappointed to see the changes they made. Orpheus and Eurydice's relationship is less interesting and more generic. The changed lyrics are often sloppy and not as good as the original. They fucking wrecked Epic III. Also, no hate to R/ee/ve, but he's just not a good enough singer to convince me that he could soften the heart of Hades. His high notes are awful.

8. Anonymous said: opinion: we are the tigers deserves a broadway run or at least a proshot

9. bimystique said: e/c is NOT A GOOD FUCKING SHIP. the ENTIRE PLOT OF PHANTOM OF THE OPERA is christine trying to escape erik's abuse. WHAT FUCKING PART OF THAT IS ROMANTIC TO YOU PEOPLE.

10. Anonymous said: unpopular theatre opinion(s): Dear Evan Hansen is Very Bad for its handling of mental illness, Hamilton is overrated and praised too much, and high school/college musical theatre programs can be just as good as Broadway. (also, musical movies would be better if they hired broadway actors, but that's not an unpopular opinion)

11. Anonymous said: I don’t like Lin Manuel Miranda and Hamilton is overrated

12. Anonymous said: I don’t like dear Evan Hansen..... at all. I think it’s kind of boring and really overhyped.

13. Anonymous said: unpopular opinion: in the heights is far better than Hamilton. both are good but ith hits different yknow

14. Anonymous said: The bring it on and legally blonde musicals are BAD! The movies are 100 times better

15. Anonymous said: unpopular opinion? wicked is the epitome of white feminism. it's preached as super great for representation but we literally got the first black glinda in 2019?!?!?!? and before that woc could only play elphaba who's villainized and deemed evil by the whole city

16. Anonymous said: Not so much an opinion as a reaction, but of all Lin's works (ITH, Bring it On, 21 Chump Street, Hamilton), 21 Chump Street gets the biggest emotional reaction of all the cast recordings. The second Justin is like "I don't want your money" (And then later on with the "...what the heck did you.... dooooo", I am a complete goner. Worse than Abuela Claudia and Philip Hamilton's deaths combined

17. Anonymous said: Whenever Je.ssie Mu.eller hits certain notes, she sounds like Tommy Pickles from Rugrats.

18. Anonymous said: aotd6: not everyone knows what im talking about, but the cats 2016 broadway revival choreography was WAYYYY better than the original. the original had a lot of creepy uncomfortable moments and the new one looks way cleaner and up to date

19. Anonymous said: raoul is better than the phantom in every conceivable way

20. Anonymous said: I hate Anastasia so much. it's such a boring show and the music is uninteresting. I wanted to like it so bad but GOD is it boring.

21. Anonymous said: In the Heights.... Overrated.

22. Anonymous said: I do not know if this is an unpopular opinion or not, but here is my opinion: Musicals that are entirely or nearly entirely songs (Hamilton, Hadestown, In The Heights, etc) are the most valid bc I can understand the plot without using wikipedia (I'm looking at you, Jagged Little Pill, I love you but what is your plot????)

23. Anonymous said: I'd rather have a bad film adaptation than no film adaptation

24. Anonymous said: Rent sucks and while it was a stepping stone for more ""controversial"" topics to appear on Broadway it's actually biphobic and features several generally terrible people doing generally terrible things and doesn't actually address the real crisis at all; it's all performative wokeness. The only real good it did was cast a bunch of "nobodies" for the time and make theater somewhat more accessible.

25. stardust-and-seas said: Dear Evan Hansen doesn't properly address mental health despite being about mental health and resolves nobodies character arcs satisfactorily. It's another show that reaches its hands around the throats of marginalized teenagers saying "look I'm relatable!!" The songs taken out of context are significantly more powerful than when placed in the context of the show, which gives us exactly zero evidence of Evan's work to improve and also never resolves Evan's u healthy goals in the first place.

26. stardust-and-seas said: Be More Chill is a raging dumpster fire and the only decent song from it, Michael in the Bathroom, reads as a whiny rich white boy whose potential social anxiety and depression is left ambiguous, which is exactly what it is. When taken out of context it better exemplifies the othering that happens to marginalized groups but lets be real here: bullying/cliques don't happen to "just anyone"; it's the marginalized groups that are othered and abandoned for not being "normal"

27. stardust-and-seas said: There's a difference between shows that don't take themselves seriously because they're meant to be fun and light and shows that pretend not to take themselves too seriously but want to be taken seriously by the audience and the latter always ends up mediocre at best

28. redueka said: i think that dear evan hansen handles every issue it presents badly. i also think that beetlejuice was badly directed

29. Anonymous said: Well I don’t EVER condone cheating, I’m team Jamie in the last five years. He tried so hard to make their relationship and life good, and Cathy gave him nothing in return

30. youcanlolyoucansayohwell said: The answer of the day- I don't get the BMC hype. I'm out of the age bracket it's meant for that might it be. I enjoy it but I don't think it's the greatest thing in the world like some theatre fans do.

31. Anonymous said: i like the rent 2005 recording better than the obcr

32. Anonymous said: unpopular opinion ? : the music of wicked just like isn’t that good. like it’s good but it’s not like, Good, yknow. it’s pretty standard it doesn’t stand out to me. kinda boring

33. Anonymous said: mari.ah r.ose fa.ith is not a good regina george. everything she says sounds monotonous and while i understand she's trying to play off the ""whatever"" teenager (she does this a lot with her teenage characters), 90% of the time she sounds and looks like she doesn't want to be there; her voice is great but most songs feel unnatural and forced and she changes them too much. she's just not selling regina to me as a believable character (this is all from a technical point of view)

34. Anonymous said: Unpopular Opinion: as much as i like musicals based on movies (like waitress), i think not every movie needs to be a musical.

35. Anonymous said: Unpopular opinion (?) the emojiland musical Kinda Slaps

36. Anonymous said: as one of my high school tech theatre teachers once said: "Andrew Lloyd Webber is overrated"

37. Anonymous said: sorry to whoever likes it but Seussical is an absolutely nonsense crackpot plot disguised with okay-to-good music, like I don't even know where to start. I was in the show and didn't even know there was an entire secondary plot line featuring sending children to war until we were halfway through rehearsals

[shytiff]

Small Dec Wins

i cant believe its December already tf?!?!?!

1 - poli KIA today. saw a mother who cant feel the movement of their baby. the senior midwife tried to find the baby’s heart beat but not finding it. she said she hopes she were wrong. fell asleep at 3pm-ish, woke up super hungry. ate. i swear i feel like my weight when i measured it this morning was ~52, but after eating its close to 54 lol. eating banana and chocolate nextar is yummm. dalbang today is hella funny as always and suuper endearing. fell asleep after dalbang, didnt study hufttt

2 - today im at igd but joined azkia at vk for a bit to see partus. its not that im scared (maybe not consciously) but when the mom was being stitched i felt lightheaded, nausea, cold extremities, and i even had to squat multiple times because i couldnt stand. But i felt better after the partus so maybe seeing it was the cause. I did not feel scared at all honestly ._. and i’ve seen multiple partus before. i dont know why. i can literally feel my symphatetic tone giving out lmaoo. tried matcha latte with Cy matcha powder. it tasted more milky and grassy. mom thought it tasted like nori. i prever cocodeli alll the way (although Cy is cheaper). i think it also has a bit of caffeine that made me feel awake like a normal person should be. 

3 - today is vk but there’s no patient so thank god i saw sumn yesterday. did some cicil ukmppd in the morning accompanied by matcha latte. tried to order dufan tickets and i couldnt find my damn ktp...... fell asleep after worrying about said ktp

4 - matcha latte in the car, swab at lmk, went to dufan by tj with willy, had quite some funn with atikah nila willy amel pupuy. first time trying kereta misteri, quite fun. it rained after ashar so we didnt ride anything after that. turns out my ktp was at barel’s fotocopy lmaoo thankyou ara for picking it. went to solaria ancol afterwards, picked up by mom. i didnt tell her in the morning that i was going to dufan lmao. plenary @ zoom 19 pm. rapat nemo. fell asleep.

5 - went to lmk by tj to surprise clara. went back home and fell asleep. didnt rly do anything afterwards because this ragged body gets tired easily and i dont eat much recently. i can feel the difference before and after eating and there’s actual energy after eating. its not that im hungry though, but i feel less energized. felt annoyed terrible and just wanna lay in bed (this is unrelated with the less food in my system). even though i met up with friends

6 - after LOTS of sleeping i feel somehow better but not to a ‘normal’ amount. watched kimbab family videos. did power vinyasa by doogether with fianti. took a shower and ate indomie and i felt quite normal, except i slept again wtf. i thought i would have the second half of the day but nah. did self tryouts with fianti, 150 FDI questions. I got 96/150 right. huft. such a great reality check

7 - poli lansia with dokter isip, matcha latte in the afternoon rly helps me not sleeping the day away, packed up for depok

8 - poli umum with dr gita (helped doing phys exam), packed the rest of my stuff, ate some risol and matcha lattteee in the car, took swab results, picked up hazmats etc, zoom discussion with FT PKM Kalideres (dr gita) on the way, and i finally arrived at tamel. dinner is granola with vsoy. Taste like a slightly wet granola bar, nutty fiber-y vibe

9 - walked in ui with ara, managed to jog from the trees near st ui until kuburan bikun wow. i reached that point where my leg and heart were going in a steady unburdened pace and my willpower to keep going on was tested. tried the signature steak in Double U Steak by Chef Widi, while ara tried ribeye. the ribeye was more tender than the signature. but the seasoning in the signature is quite delish, salty and oily without being too much (like futago ya). read poppyland fast pass from ara’s phone omg season 1 is finally complete! went to coftof (omgggg i miss this place), it looks different now. ordered matcha latte and it tasted weirdly like a soy milk although ara doesnt feel that way. the matcha tasted weird. wont repurchase. read chainsaw man, its so entertaining, funny and deep at the same time. denji mess around and be too naive sometimes but hes lowkey hot lmaooo. aki is lovvvvve.

10 - first day at rsud budhi asih. had moesli combined with granola + vsoy for brekkie. went back to tamel at 3 pm. it rained when i got back. bought warteg lugina worth 32k. walked to sbux for tumbler day its been a while since i had their matcha latte. it tasted quite good, but not as good as i remembered (?) maybe bcs i asked for non fat milk. sbux closes at 8 pm for now hikss

11 - left tamel at about 7:10 and arrived on budhi asih at 08:54 yalll the traffic. Icu. Bought eatlah double and ate the salted egg part. Nap. ICU discussion with dr Dedi @8pm. I presented from my phone to save data hehe,,

12 - woke up at 8, eatlah brown butter for brekkie, symcard, saladstop's caesar salad for lunch (quite 'eneg' because i didnt eat the cheese evenly so the chicken and cheese were eaten last after the vegs are out. The vegetable's not that variative, and the non vegs make the salad taste delicious (albeit maybe not THAT healthy). Evening jog @UI and i realized i can get wifi sitting near the lake n library. Stared at the night sky from my room, i swear the sky seems super clear. Saw tiny fireworks in the distance

13 - ate muesli and saladstop’s banana walnut cake, symcard, bought moon chicken and saladpoint. lunch was egg salad and the wings. the original tasted so good like??? maybe i havent had msg for a while. also tried big bang, not too spicy which is nice. cicil ukmppd. put my laundry at buih barel lmaoo. try out with fianti. got 70/100

14 - breakfast was salad and leftover chicken. today was bangsal with angga armand. the geriatric patient has a loud murmur yall (and scoliosis, so much that the heart looks distorted). went to margo city to see sales, but when i think about it id rather just thrift stuff lmao. bought lugina. slept through kuliah guru besar. writing this in yellow truck coffee, that had 2 customers on the 1st floor including me. tried banana milk. yall after trying to drink less sugar the beverage tasted super sweet. my headache just goes away. sugar is magic but unhealthy whyyyyy.

15 - igd siang with indah. This body sure is frail. Did cbd with dr afifah AND rescheduled pleno. Rip mobile data i have to use for hotspot.

16 - ok today. Inserted goedel and did bagging. I bagged the patient the wrong way at first (too much). Thankfully the nurses were kind and taught us a lot :) watched some bts content. I feel like after reading househusband my tiktok page is now immensely funnier. Dalbang is also hilarious as always. Put on ginseng sheet mask (smells quite strong)

17 - bangsal. snacked on fried chicken. matcha latte starbucks (turns out its quite full here) and liqo about keeping our tongues in check

18 - arrived at icu. And then opened line. Turns out hadin's swab is positive, so agung kak iman and me have to isolate and swab. So i went back. Ordered kanayam chicken and fish and tempe. Nasi liwet tasted goood damn. Sleptt in the afternoon. Pleno at 4 pm (entered the room 4:30). Had no motivation to do anything. Azkia is getting married! Spent 20 mins formulating words to congratulate her lmaoo

19 - osce simulation, kak nanu was so kind and encouraging. Did try out solid. Lunch is fish bite pasta with melted cheese (cause i had to reach the minimum amount for promo). It got cold so its not that good (pairing it with self made mentai sauce, mixing the mayo and chili, is way much better). Jogged in ui (and searched for wifi). Approached by someone selling haraus coffee (25k), saying that some earnings will be for charity. Its basically sweet. Can barely taste the coffee.

20 - had kanayam for lunch (brekkie is almost always muesli lately). The nasi liwet tasted much better the first time. Walked to yellow truck coffee in the pouring rain. Got banana milk. Saw webinar ksk (electrolyte correction and dr nadhira talkshow). What i got from it is that, dr nadhira is a different person from the first place. Shes visionary, knows what she want and not afraid to reach it. The mindset is different. Even if i try as hard as her, her propensity to growth is different. Cicil ukmppd. Try out with fianti (got 72/100). Talked for an hour about love and marriage and engagements (there are so much of it lately)

21 - leftover kanayam for brekkie, also ate roti salman in cikini st. swab today (met kris, nessa and others). muesli for lunch. i thought my body felt a bit warm, so i decided to find sumn to eat. tried kedai abu bakar’s spaghetti brulee. its okay. maybe because its not too cheesy or meaty, mainly bechamel sauce. the one pupuy made is much tastier. finished the whole 10x20 portion in 2 eating sesh. cicil ukmppd @ bed in the evening (somehow felt refreshed enough to be able to concentrate in bed)

22 - went early to icu to put dops form. lugina for early lunch. i feel like my metabolism is faster? or my body is not so much in calorie deficit mode anymore and it got greedier lmao i used to just ignore hunger but not now, for health. starbiiies tumbler day. ordered black tea latte with non fat milk and vanilla syrup (because raspberry syrup is no more). did cbd geri ppt. 

23 - finally knew the swab result bcs kak iman asked kak farras. thankfully negative. igd with jordi. quite a few chances to do iv line, but i failed 2 times. managed to do iv injection to insert 2 drugs. saw the worst cpr ive ever seen in my life. its too slow, with maximal interruption. fish bite for lunch. wasted the rest of my day

24 - originally intended to run but i cant bring myself out of bed. packed up my stuff. picked up by mom. got the paper result of swab, got ksk from kelvyn @ capitol. can finally drink self-made matcha latte again, but it tasted horrible. i know cy matcha doesnt have that much going on, but even this is low even for them. previously i was starting to get used to the grassy smell.

25 - my lil bro remarked “maybe shes depressed because she doesnt have her chair”. fuck yall. this “depression” that im in is caused by this very place and the people. and im supposed to still muster the strength to study for ukmppd AND get my face together for solid book photoshoot. that shit is too much. this is why the money that goes to cafe, and the bike ride there is worth it for my sanity. after showering, things felt a bit better. had absolutely no will to study today. ate muesli with a bit of matcha latte.

26 - muesli for breakfast. matcha latte is lyfff ive probably said this before but it ~somehow~ makes me feel normal and not in a slump. like im a regular person. with normal moods. and not wanting to sleep all the time. i try to do ukmppd exercises but the pace is so fucking slow, bcs im distracted by get rich haha,,,. the latest potn update (64) is omgggg the mixed feelings? love? hate? anger? everything and nothing? the ~tension and passion~? im obsessed. watched a ton of bts content today and yesterday lmao.

27 - nasi kebuli for brekkie. went to flavola, im the first customer lmao. tried kopi susu coklat, tasted quite close enough to janjiw’s kopi soklat. had the same ~improved mood and concentration~ effect. tried to read ksk. bought milky banana 1L from puyo to give dajen (its his bday yesterday) (i feel prompted (?) to gift people when theyve given a present to me) (because my love lang is not gift giving at all so i barely think abt gifts lmao). talked with sum 33 ipa guys @ dajens house. yay appropriate amount of social battery charging. tryout with fianti, padi this time. got 67/100. 

28 - ate muesli with matcha latte after breakfast. cicil ukmppd. Listened to yoongi's vlive until i fell asleep lol. 2 burger and salad for dinner. omggg hansol revealed his gf. 

29 - spent half of my day tidying up the mess that is my room. figured out what to wear for solid book photoshoot with fianti, ara. matcha latte terosss. phd for dinner. 

30 - breakfast is muesli with cimory choco hazelnut. mom made matcha chocolate brownies. tryna study. slow pace terosss. read some padi materials. dalbang.

31 - bought vsoy low sugar and multigrain. moved my body a bit to youtube videos. showered. felt better. it also rained (which i love). the pleasant mood only lasted til the evening. did nothing from 7pm even though im not sleepy. cant tell when did i start to sleep

and just like that, 2020 kkeut. its sad to say i dont rly remember much remarkable things this year. other than the trip and memories with minor rotation friends. i just remember wasting my life away in my house. i guess that’s the danger of living a monotone life. sometimes you gotta invest some time to have fun, to have motivation to live on and do things. not doing this makes it difficult to live day by day. and friends. meeting friends, seeing new stuff. that helps me live. 

[williamaltman]

Madoka Magica Rant: Rebellion, the original ending, the (im)possible sequel.

Ugh. I love Madoka Magica so, so, SO much, and I can’t help but rewatch it many times and watch all the reactions people make. But as I go towards the ending, I always get depressed... Because of fucking Rebellion. This reactor I’m watching right now doesn’t even know and/or talk about it on his reaction to the last 2 episodes as some others do, but I’m dumb and went to read the comments, and of course people there are talking about how there’s a movie. I love the ending of the anime so much. It's literally perfect to me. It’s bittersweet on a way that both the bitter and the sweet feel so satisfying, and it’s just such a good ending narratively. Yeah, it’s not perfect for the characters. Yeah, Homura doesn’t really get what she wants at the end. But it solves all the narrative threads, it gives closure to everything and it just fits both temathically and tonally with everything. That’s what makes it so good. You can see how that was the ending that the whole rest of the anime was made with it in mind. It’s not what you expect but it makes so much sense and it’s not done based on how surprising and shocking it is. The whole anime acts as build up to it, and all of the logics that make it posible are seeded throughout all the episodes. Meanwhile, Rebellion... That ending wasn’t even what it was originally meant to happen. It was just supposed to be Homura’s farewall, as it was foreshadowed on the end of the anime when Madoka says they’ll meet again. They came up with that as a way to leave the franchise open for a continuation. Aka for money. Except that it has been over 6 years, and... Nothing. And now everyone has already gotten used to the Rebellion ending being the definitive ending... Oh, and as an in-story justification, also because “becoming a god at 14 is too much!” or something. Yeah, of course it is, that’s what makes the ending so big and impactful. I can’t believe they changed it on a whim like that. Artistically and technically, Rebellion is amazing. It looks incredible, it must have been an amazing experience to watch it on 3D on the theathre. But, writing-wise, it’s not as good and tight as the anime. As I said, the anime had a logical explanation for everything that happened. Rebellion has “Ai yo!”. And witches being extinguished is also the best solution for the dilemma of Madoka becoming a witch if she makes a wish, but if she doesn’t walpurgisnatch destroys everything, and Homura has to go back in time but if she does she adds to the karmic destiny making Madoka a worse witch, but if she doesn’t she goes into despair and becomes a witch herself. Meanwhile the ending of Rebellion is not necessary and doesn’t act as a solution to the rest of the movie. There’s also the fact that, the whole universe being rewritten and changing status quo all the time is a bit “...Seriously?”. When it happens one time, because of one wish that has to be fullfilled, it makes sense, and feels impactful. When it happens again, solely because a character somehow has the power by herself to do it, it’s less impactful and cheapens this element. “The laws of the universe being rewritten, as a way to show how big the consequences of a miraculous thing was? Yeah, but that can happen multiple times anyway, lol!” Oh. And of course. I didn’t even begin to go on about how that ending literally erases Madoka’s entire character development... I literally go on every day hoping that they start making this damn 4th movie and we can get a better ending. I don’t know what exactly they can do this time. It’s gonna involve some sort of ~laws of the universe changing~ shit again, and it will be even less impactful, but at least it can give a better final status quo than the current one. The only thing I really want is for Madoka to get back her memories and go back to her old role, instead of making everything that the original anime and her character led to, pointless. But who knows if it’s actually gonna be satisfying. I know Urobuchi wrote Rebellion too, but the idea to make this ending came from the director, and if he thought he should change things on a whim because “Let’s leave it open for a sequel” and “Well, a young girl becoming a god is too much, let’s just undo that even if the entire anime logically led things to that point”, will he just let a new writer get things back to the previous state? And even if it was Urobuchi... I don’t know. He planned the anime so well, but even Rebellion was already more than he wanted to do. It was just supposed to be an extra thing, just showing something that by watching the original anime we knew would happen. And now there’s a whole new world and he would have to, like... Create another different ending. After making two others already.  This situation literally pains me so much because I genuinely think of Madoka as... The best thing ever. Like... There are so many things that I feel emotionally attached to, but I know aren’t technically that good. And things that I can recognize are incredibly well-crafted and extraordinary, but that don’t resonate emotionally with me. Madoka is like the ultimate story that combines both. And at the end of the day it makes me so frustrated. And the worst is that I have this feeling that it shouldn’t have to. Because something that completely satisfied me was done, was meant as the end, and then it just got undone. So I got robbed. And, somehow, no one else seems to feel the same. It’s so hurtful to see so many people out there saying they prefer Rebellion, and Rebellion is the real ending, and Rebellion is necessary and, and... To me it could never be. I understand that it’s because most people came in contact with the franchise with it already existing and so, watching the 12 episodes and then it was what they always experienced as the whole thing. But that just makes me even sadder. And so I’m here frustrated and alone. If I had a soul gem it would already be a grief seed... All I can do is try to rationalize this whole thing of, like... Madoka Magica, the anime, the 12 episodes, is complete thing. Rebellion is on a series of movies. It’s the continuation of them, not of the episodic anime series... The movies are different, Sayaka doesn’t have the hairpin as a magical girl, for example(yeah, it doesn’t work very well. Especially cause the fandom thinks of it as “12 episodes + Rebellion”, and tells everyone to watch it like that, and says to people reacting to the anime to watch Rebellion after it as a direct continuation... Sigh).

[lechemoflife]

Getting out of Comfort Zone or remain in God’s Zone of Grace?

What comes to our mind when we hear the combination of words of “Comfort Zone”?  I’m sure a lot of motivational speeches and inspiring quotes flashes across our minds. It’s because we often hear that we must move out from our Comfort Zone to succeed. On the other day I was listening to this Tedex Talk where I heard, “Successful life begins at the end of Comfort Zone”. So what do you think is Comfort Zone? Should we remain within comfort zone or move out of it? Well, personally for me, this is quite debatable. I’ll be trying to elaborate this on both the school of thoughts as listed below:

Step out of your comfort zone; success begins at the end of  your comfort zone

Never come out of the Comfort Zone. Keep     learning, keep expanding your Comfort Zone

Let us take a look at the first point. Does “stepping out of comfort zone” refer to some sort of adventure? We understand that it’s quite traditional to think that we must move out of our comfort zone in order to succeed. It has naturally become such a widely accepted thought. Yes, we must. We must get up and get out of our bed early morning even during the winters. We can’t lazy around like the way I do sometimes. We must get out of our homes to get to our respective work place. We can’t just sit and expect our rice-n-noodles bowl to come to our table on its own. We have to get up and get going. With respect to our professional life, areas where we feel we need to upgrade, we must step out, step up and open ourselves to learn the new methodologies, new technologies, adapt to new processes, pick up new skill sets and upgrade ourselves.  We must open the door of our commitment levels; open and get out; open to learning, to practicing and be more effective. This is applicable to our jobs, business or even our personal lives. When we learn about Peter, we see him stepping out of his comfort zone. Peter seeing Jesus walking on the water, dares to step out of the boat in faith. Below is the excerpt from the passage; Gospel of Mathew 14: 24-29: 24But the ship was now in the midst of the sea, tossed with waves: for the wind was contrary. 25And in the fourth watch of the night Jesus went unto them, walking on the sea. 26And when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were troubled, saying, It is a spirit; and they cried out for fear. 27But straightway Jesus spake unto them, saying, Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid. 28And Peter answered him and said, Lord, if it be thou, bid me come unto thee on the water. 29And he said, Come. And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on the water, to go to Jesus.

To step out from the boat on the stormy sea can be seen as a case of someone girded with a robust degree of faith and be perceived as an apparent case of stepping out of comfort zone. It takes courage and a mind that is incredibly faith-conditioned to do something seemingly so bizarre. It isn’t quite an informal affair…Is it?

Now, let us move to the other side of the table, to a school of thought that is poles apart. Let us turn to few references from The Word. Psalm 91:1 He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. 4He shall cover thee with his feathers, and under his wings shalt thou trust: his truth shall be thy shield and buckler.

 Let me tell you something you may already know; “The wisdom of this world is always contrary to the divine Wisdom of God”. However, if you notice I quoted from The Word in support of the first school of thought. And perhaps one could serve even more references to support the same; and this is because The Word of God is a two edged sword (Hebrews 4:12), and we the children of God need to discern by His divine Grace what means to whom, when, in what context and why. God’s Word has repeatedly mentioned about 6 times directly or indirectly that means “the JUST shall live by FAITH” (Hab 2:4, Rom 1:17, Gal 3:11, Heb 10:38, Ezek 18:9,  Ezek 18:22). If that is the case, then why step out from the secret place? Why step out from under His wings? Why shouldn’t we abide under the shadow of the Almighty? Now Bible says in Hebrews 11:1 that “Now faith is the substance of the things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen”. 

The wisdom of this world that promotes stepping out of our Comfort zone needs to take a back seat at least until the end of this article. I leave it up to you if you would want to bring it back to the front seat. Allow me to take you back to investigate the scenario of Peter deciding to step out of the boat into the raging sea to walk toward Jesus and a little further. Mathew 14:28 And Peter answered him and said, Lord, if it be thou, bid me come unto thee on the water. 29And he said, Come. And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on the water, to go to Jesus. 30But when he saw the wind boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink, he cried, saying, Lord, save me.

Imagine this whole episode prudently may be with your eyes shut just as it happened. You’ll learn that Peter’s mind wasn’t fully conditioned with the kind of faith that Jesus talks about in Mathew 17:20. Faith of Peter, it was a momentary excitement seeing Jesus walking on water. If Peter had a high degree of faith-conditioned mind, he would have stepped out of the boat just as if he’s stepping inside the boat. Friends, when Jesus is walking on water, when Jesus the creator and the master of this Universe is walking on the water, when Jesus who gave us the authority to be called as the children of God through his name (John 1:12) is walking on the water; then why can’t we too simply step out of the boat and join him on an evening walk talking to him with his loving hands resting upon our shoulders?

 I call this phenomenon as “Expanding the Comfort Zone” which is a greater challenge than stepping out of the comfort zone. For instance, in our professional life too, we need to take up the process of learning and development as a routine and not some sort “stepping out” ceremony. A true child of God, doesn’t need to step out from God’s zone of Grace but needs to keep conditioning his faith to perfection like how an athlete conditions his body for his race (I Tim 4:7 ….exercise thyself rather unto godliness). Let me reiterate, “The wisdom of this world is always contrary to the divine Wisdom of God”. Remember…. while most of us believe in the phrase “Survival of the fittest” that originated from Darwinian evolutionary theory, God teaches us something that is altogether conflicting in its entirety. Let us turn to the Gospel of Mark 8: 35 “For whosoever will save his life shall loose it; but whosoever shall loose his life for my sake and the gospel’s, the same shall save it”. This verse is just so brilliant and if you notice, is the precise inverse of Darwin’s theory, which simply means don’t try to safeguard yourselves or your life to survive and sustain; because in doing so, you’ll LOSE your life. And what Jesus further puts forth is also very significant.

 Consider the professional athletes; an athlete has to step out of his comfort zone early morning and be on the training tracks regardless of summers or winters. He keeps conditioning his body every single day for years no matter what comes his way, certainly not to lose the race right? The pursuit of a true athlete is not just limited to winning the race on the track but also many associated reasons; Respect, Honour, Expectations, Anticipations, Pride, Signature identity, Mending broken relationships. It could be any reason; I can tell you these because I was myself a trained athlete for 800mtrs track event in school. However, what do we see in the Gospel of Luke 13:30 “And, behold, there are last which shall be first, and there are first which shall be last”. I understand this verse doesn’t mean literal but spiritual.  Whatever the case, in God’s word “race” is always referred to as a “Quest” or a “Pursuit” of certain accomplishment. In I Corinthians 9:24-25 this accomplishment is referred to as “an incorruptible crown”. Further in I Tim 4:7-9, it’s advised to “….exercise thyself rather unto godliness” and while this world and its wisdom tells us to focus on physical fitness and endurance, the God’s word sets the tone straight; “…bodily exercise profiteth little”

 Remember Noah whom God commanded to create an ark? Noah took about 120 years to create an ark, a 120 years to create a zone of comfort, a zone of safety, a zone of prayer and fellowship with his family and loved ones. God specifically told Noah to get locked up in an ark, and while he built the arc, he kept preaching too for 120 years.  He built the ark exactly as per the mandate and blueprint that God gave to Noah. Because it was God’s will that Noah remains sealed in His grace.

 Remember the garden of Eden? …where the first man Adam and Eve stepped out of the comfort zone to try some sweet adventure? This wonderful garden was created especially for both to remain within the divine grace and with all the comforts. That little adventure affair of disobedience had to be paid by the cost of having to step out of the garden forever losing the grace in God’s sight.

 Remember Cain who ran away after killing his brother Abel? He was distanced and out of sight, fallen from God’s grace. Jesus says in the Gospel of Mathew 11:28 Come unto me all ye that labour and are heavy laden and I will give you “rest”. Jesus isn’t calling us for an adventure but rest and comfort. Honestly, stepping out of comfort zone is way easier than staying within the comfort zone and to keep conditioning our faith.

 David, one of my favourite personalities, on many occasions of prayers and supplications mention that God is his hiding place. He never seemingly wants to be separated from God but always wants to be in His hiding place, in His safety and comfort. He keeps talking to God with so much of intimacy that it immaculately reflects in his Psalms. Let us look at few of them:  Psalm 32:7 Thou art my hiding place; thou shalt preserve me from trouble... Psalm 119:114 Thou art my hiding place and my shield... Psalm 17:8 …hide me under the shadow of thy wings Psalm 27:5  …in the secret of his tabernacle shall he hide me... Psalm 31:20 Thou shalt hide them in the secret of thy presence from the pride of man... Psalm 64:2 Hide me from the secret counsel of the wicked… Psalm 143:9 …I flee unto thee to hide me. Psalm 61:3 For thou hast been a shelter for me… Talking about Psalms, I recall Solomon the wise’ Proverbs 18:10 The name of the Lord is a strong tower: the righteous runneth into it, and is safe. Yes, the righteous runs into it NOT out of it. Let’s examine if we are indeed righteous because we don’t see anyone running out or “Stepping out” and still remaining safe. Our strong tower is Jesus. I solemnly clinch on to the school of thought that a true child of God doesn’t need stepping out of God’s Zone of grace and run away into the wild, out of sight, distanced and fallen from His grace. Rather it’s so much more challenging to remain within God’s comfort zone. I’m strongly of the conviction that one should never come out of their comfort zone; rather keep learning, keep conditioning the faith, keep surrendering to God’s will and His divine grace, keep expanding your comfort zone (God’s Zone of Grace), invite others under your roof of prayer and worship, into your fellowship, share the gospel, keep advancing in your spiritual journey and intimacy with God”. Moses also kept listening to God. He kept learning and depending on God’s grace. And he did quite well. From Egypt to the Mount Sinai for an appointment to meet God, from a stammerer to a great evangelical and prophetic speaker, He was an ���Exceeds All” Performer altogether. Wherever he went, he was confident because he was within the divine comfort zone, obeying and surrendering himself to the divine will of God.

 Shall we meet Peter again who stepped out of the boat? By God’s grace, in His cover of comfort and assurance and by faith, every “stepping out” would become “stepping in”. Let’s depend more and more on God’s grace and be found sealed within His hiding place. And in this pursuit, may our focus be on conditioning of our faith. Praise God.

[always-evergreen]

I literally want you to answer all the book q list qs. Thx

haide ur a disaster

putting under a read more bc I dont want to clog up ur dashes

1: What book did you last finish? When was that? - I finished 1984 this afternoon!

2: What are you currently reading? - currently reading zodiac unmasked by Robert graysmith

3: What book are you planning to read next? - a confederacy of dunces by john kennedy toole

4: What was the last book you added to your tbr? - the chronicles of Narnia (as a re-read)

5: Which book did you last re-read? - the Christmas mystery by jostein gaarder. I read it every christmas

6: Which book was the last one you really, really loved? - I read the picture of dorian gray last month which I rlly enjoyed

7: What was/were the last book/books you bought? - I bought the whole raven cycle earlier

8: Paperback or hardcover? Why? - paperback bc hardback is rlly unwieldy

9: YA, NA or Adult? Why? - tbh im not overly fussed:/

10: Sci-Fi or fantasy? Why? - fantasy! I think bc I grew up reading harry potter and Narnia and stuff like that im just always gonna have a real love for fantasy stuff

11: Classic or modern? Why? - hmmm I guess classic? but I dont rlly mind

12: Political memoirs or comedic memoirs? - comedic bc I dont understand politics and I like to have fun

13: Name a book with a really bad movie/tv adaption - its not terrible but the first one that comes to mind is the book thief, just bc I love that book sm and the movie didn't quite live up to what I wanted

14: Name a book where the movie/tv adaption actually was better than the original - I cant honestly think of one at the moment

15: What book changed your life? - hmm maybe lord of the rings?

16: If you could bring three books to a deserted island which would you bring and why? - fahrenheit 451 bc its my favourite book, the book thief bc it was my first favourite book, and the statistical probability of love at first sight just bc its sweet and fun and the other books are serious

17: If you owned a bookshop what would you call it? - haven would be cute maybe

18/19: Which character from a book is the most/least like you? - combining these two bc I genuinely cannot think of an answer, ive never really seen a lot of myself in any characters or consciously thought that a character was nothing like me tbh:/

20/21: Best summer/winter read? - also combining these bc I dont change my reading habits based on seasons

22: Pro or anti e-readers? Why? - I dont have anything against them but I dont use them, just bc I prefer physical books

23: Bookdepository or Amazon? - idk what bookdepository is so unfortunately I guess amazon:/

24: Do you prefer to buy books online or in a bookshop? - bookshop all the way! I love bookshops so much!

25: If you could be a character from a book for just one day who would you be and why? (Bonus: any specific day in the story?) - pretty niche and also I cant rmmbr her name but I just spotted the girl who circumnavigated fairyland in a ship of her own making on my shelf and that little girl has a pretty baller life so ill take a day in fairyland please and thank you

26: If you could be a character from a book for their entire life who would you be and why? - no thanks! I feel like that would turn into a massive bummer eventually

27: If you could change one thing about mainstream literature what would you change? (i.e. more diversity, better writing, better plot etc.) - tbh I dont read a lot of modern mainstream books so I dont rlly have an answer to this

28: How many books have you read so far this year? - mmm 11 or 12?

29: How do you sort your shelves? (i.e. by color, author, title etc.) - by author im not a monster

30: Who’s your favorite author? - ray bradbury

31: Who’s your favorite contemporary author? - mmm maybe david levithan?

32: Who’s your favorite fantasy author? - tolkein babyyyy

33: Who’s your favorite Sci-Fi author? - I guess thatll also be Bradbury lol

34: List five OTPs - I would prefer not to I dont rlly have ships anymore

35: Name a book you consider to be terribly underrated - I cant rlly think of anything tbh

36: Name a book you consider to be terribly overrated - lolita suuuuckssss

37: How many books are actually in your bookshelf/shelves right now? - approximately 200, with abt 35-40 in piles on the floor ready to be donated

38: What language do you (most often) read in? - english

39: Name one of your favorite childhood books - just got a sudden vivid memory of the animals of farthing wood which tbh? slapped

40: Name one of your favorite books from your teenage years - ooft uh ill go w the night school series bc I for real fucked w them so much when I was like 15 lmao

41: Do you own a library card? How often do you use it? - I dont think I do

42: Which was the best book you had to read in school? - oh that's gotta be fahrenheit 451 and even though its not technically a book ill put twelfth night up there as well

43: Are you the kind of person who reads several books at once or the kind of person who can only read one book at a time? - I can do either and dont really have a preference

44: Do you like to listen to music when you read? - occasionally, sometimes I find it hard to concentrate w music on but sometimes it doesn't bother me, depends on the mood

45: What is your favorite thing to eat when you read? - something that wont make my fingers greasy lol

46: What is your favorite thing to drink when you read? - I dont normally

47: What do you do to get out of a reading slump? - read a couple of short books just to ease myself back into it

48: Where is your favorite place to read? - my bed, but recently been enjoying the back garden when its sunny

49: When is your favorite time to read? - I like reading at night just before I go to bed

50: Why do you love to read? - it was instilled in me pretty young bc both my parents are big readers and I guess I was kinda shy and awkward when I was a kid (still am actually lol) so it was kind of a shield/escape? also im a fucking nerd