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omg-im-such-a-masochist · 1 month

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Anywhere

Summary: Let’s thank Hozier for whatever this is because I can only think of it as brainrot. I had a part of this written for almost a year in my docs and couldn’t find inspiration to finish it but thanks to the incarnated Irish god I did.

Pairing: Hook x F!Reader (aka Tiger)

Warnings: Angst, mention of uncontrolled feelings, toxic relationship, self doubt, worthlessness, possible happy ending? idk

Tags: @theworldofotps , @writtingrose , @daddyhausen , @melissahausen , @unoficialy-married-to-ace-austin , @sophiewolfheart-blog , @sultryfandoms , @new-zealand-chic , @crowleysqueenofhell , @thealliasylum , @legit9thlunaticwarrior , @mjfass , @josiewrites , @seeingstarks , @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch , @whenimakeitshine1234 , @moxkindagirl , @sunshinevirus , @im-just-a-mississippi-girl , @ripleyswhore , @wickedval

It's the sound of it that brings me there

This city locked into the song of prayer

That finds no melody

Every moment of the working day

The twitching muscles in each step I take

The prayer is all of me

The Black & Mild hung from his lips and sent a white smoke up to the night sky, the burning tobacco somewhat was helping him soothe his instincts but Tyler asked himself for how long the warm smoke inside his mouth was going to be enough to keep his mind distant from the one place it didn’t want to stay away from.

Tyler chose to be absent from work for yet another week, and the backstage gossip was starting to build up to the point of annoyance. Even Tyler’s father had given him one of his famous earfuls earlier that night when he texted to say he wasn’t coming to work that week, and even though hours had passed by, Tyler could still hear his dad’s screams through the FaceTime call.

Another wave of warm smoke filled up his mouth before traveling down to his throat and lungs, all along carrying within itself the one word his father repeatedly had so vehemently: “obsession”.

“You’re obsessed with her, Tyler! Obsessed with a relationship you can’t stop fucking it up, snap out of it, son! Move the fuck on! Leave that poor girl alone, Tyler. You’ve done too much damage to get her back now, so put on your big boy pants, accept the results of your damn mistakes, stop destroying everything around you, stop destroying your fucking career, let her move on, get over this unhealthy obsession, and grow.the.fuck.up!”

This wasn’t obsession though, it was love in its raw, ugly, perverse, and deepest form. “Love doesn’t have to hurt”, they say. Yeah, sure, tell that to someone so desperate to make a relationship work that they commit every single possible mistake one can make. Perhaps this was what had doomed Tyler, he loved her too much.

That I'd be

Anywhere that you are, that you are

That I'd be

Anywhere that you are, that you are

When Tyler was 15 years old, his father took him to Joe’s barber shop two blocks down their house to have his first proper ‘man’ shave. As the older man began to spread the shaving cream on Tyler’s face, his father began “See, son, a man may like many women, we may grow fond of several females and keep them in our heart but if there’s one thing you should know is that a man only loves once. Real love will only be found once, in one single woman, and it doesn’t matter whether your relationship ends up working or not, you will forever love that woman until the day you die.”

“No matter how many girls you know afterward, no one will be able to replace the one woman who owns your heart. So once you find that girl, son, make sure you love, respect, and care for her. Do everything in your power to treat her like a queen, because that will be the woman who’ll forever live in your heart”.

Tyler did his best to treat her like a queen, but some things escaped his ability of self-control. Tiger is gorgeous, she is breathtaking, has the most wonderful personality, she’s incredibly smart, the most beautiful smile Tyler has ever seen, whenever she smiles it’s like the world has been put underneath a bright spotlight. She’s funny, caring, loving, she’s the best friend anyone could ever have, and the most addicting lover, sex with Tiger is out of this world, an out-of-body experience. There’s something special about sex with her, every touch is meaningful, every kiss is a silent promise of eternal love, and with every thrust, Tyler always felt their souls connecting.

He’s aware of how this sounds like some sort of hippie talk, but there was something incredibly spiritual and powerful about Tiger that only seemed to grow during sex. Although he wasn’t one to brag, Tyler has fucked a fair share of girls ever since he was 15 years old, and until he met Tiger, he was sure no woman would ever be able to handle him properly.

But even though sex was important to Tyler - and had been the base of every relationship he had until Tiggy came up - it shockingly wasn’t the sole reason why he loved her.

Tyler caught himself craving for her in more than sexual ways, he craved her affection, her touch, her capacity to begin a conversation about anything from something she saw on the news to curiosities about religions worldwide. He craved to see her smile, to hear her loud awkward laugh, to watch her cooking while using the wooden spoon as her own personal microphone. Tyler craved her advice on life, friendships, and work. He craved to hear her voice after a nightmare, to listen to her whisper-singing as a way to help him go back to sleep. He craved her, just having her there with him, craved the knowledge of having her waiting for him somewhere. Above anything else, Tyler missed how Tiger could bring peace to his soul just by existing.

And such peace seemed to be so distant to achieve now, that the world resembled a dark pit of miserableness, emptiness, and death. A limbo Tyler was certain he would never be able to leave.

Maybe I have yet to venture out

See the places that I hear about

Planes and trains and cars

Carve their lines into a curve like blades

All I get to are mistakes half-made

Leave the door ajar

Her wet footprints were unnoticeable against the damp concrete. Her eyes wandered around the streets, searching, wondering, pretending…She tried to make it work, but trying became tiring once it turned into a routine.

It was all too much, the arguing, the outbursts of jealousy, the lack of communication, the distrust, the assumptions..those killed her the most.

‘Where were you?’, ‘Why was he looking at you like that’, ‘Why didn’t you answer your phone if you were really with your mom?’, ‘Why do you smell like aftershave?’, ‘Why are you lying to me, Tiger?! Just tell me the fucking truth!’

Jealousy is not as glamorous as the books make it seem, it’s quite the opposite actually, it kills your mind along with your feelings until there comes a day when you realize that you don’t feel anything at all, and that’s when sadness takes over.

Mourning over something that once brought you so much happiness is a strange feeling. Looking at someone who used to be so dear to you and slowly watching them become the most despicable monster before your eyes is the most brutal thing one can go through. Love is such a delicate feeling, it’s alarming to see how quickly it can die when it stops being nourished. Tiger never believed it would be possible to stop loving Tyler, but life and its cruel - yet valuable - lessons showed her otherwise, it showed her how fairly easy it is to stop loving someone.

She never saw it coming, the day that she would leave the small one-bedroom apartment in New York behind, yet she did. Otherwise, how could she still be living? Even more so, how could Tyler still be alive if she hadn’t left that place for good?

Tiger loved freedom, while Tyler didn’t understand its meaning. Tiger wanted to be free with Tyler, as for Tyler, there was no freedom if he was with Tiger.

But I'd be

Anywhere that you are, that you are

That I'd be

Anywhere that you are, you are

She was the air that filled his lungs, so how could anyone live without air? Tyler tried to explain that to her over and over, but all he heard back was ‘You’re killing me, Ty! You’re suffocating me so much that I feel like I’m dying’. She said other fumbled words in between but that phrase was the only thing that sank into Tyler’s ears. He went deaf after that.

Tiger tried to find a middle ground, she thought therapy could help but how do you talk to someone who doesn’t want to utter a word? It’s pointless to try to fix a relationship when for it to work is a double-sided sword. Tiger couldn’t fix something that didn’t depend only on her, but Tyler was the king of perfection, Mr. There’s Nothing Wrong. So she just gave up, she couldn’t play tug-war anymore, she just wanted to leave and never go back to the Hell she was living in.

Love is not enough, it would never be enough, not if it was all it takes for a relationship to work. And both Tiger and Tyler learned that the hard way.

His eyes found her across the street, holding her small notepad and iconic glittery pen. She never came to this part of town, which made Tyler frown with worry. But her features seemed relaxed, serene even, as she observed the tall trees and how the thin rain droplets splattered the green leaves. ‘This is such a weird hobby’ Tyler thought to himself when they first met ‘Watching the leaves on a tree and scrambling down how it makes you feel’.

Tiger categorized it as ‘therapeutic’, and once she explained how it helped her ease her racing mind Tyler began admiring her for it.

Ironically enough, that was how they met back then, and now is how he meets her again after 6 months of their break up.

Watching her now, after everything Tyler knew and went through with her had him contemplating Tiger under a new light. ‘Perhaps she is happier like this, without you’ Tyler caught himself thinking, noticing how the lightheartedness that once was Tiger’s biggest quality seemed to have returned to her eyes now that she didn’t have him in her life anymore.

It’s sad to notice how the only person that you love so dearly seems to be better without you than when they were with you. Only now Tyler notices how he had killed Tiger during their time together. He killed her lightness, her freedom, her carefree nature. He transformed her into this sad caged bird that didn’t find happiness in singing anymore.

‘If you could go back in time, would you be different? Act differently? Approach things from another perspective?’ Tyler’s conscience asked him.

“Yes” Was his answer out loud, his eyes fixed on the wet pavement, without being able to keep looking at her.

‘Why? Because of your selfish reasons? Because you knew that you’d lose her if you didn’t?’ It asked him back.

But prayer

Is all of me, all of me

The prayer

Is all of me, all of me

“No” Tyler answered sincerely “Because I now know that she deserves better, way better than I ever was…way better than I could ever be”.

Tyler’s eyes tentatively looked up again, in the hopes of imprinting her true self into his mind one last time, until his orbs stopped at her caramel-colored coat standing right before him.

Tiger’s eyes wandered his face, focusing on his eye patch for a couple of seconds before asking “Are you a pirate now?”

For the first time in 6 months, Tyler let out a chuckle, “Maybe…If you like pirates then sure, I’m a pirate. But if you don’t, then I’m just a loser. The biggest asshole to ever walk the earth”.

“Yeah, that you are” She smiled sadly “Have you learned anything from it though?”

“Yeah, I did” Tyler’s fingers twitched to touch her, but he would never allow himself that, he didn’t deserve it. “Are you really here, Tiggy? I’m afraid I’m dreaming…but I don’t to be dreaming, I want this to be real”

“It could be real, Ty” She caressed his smooth cheek before smiling and sitting down beside him on the damp concrete “Wanna tell me what you’ve learned in life so far?”

But I'd be

Anywhere that you are, that you are

That I'd be

Anywhere that you are, you are

#hook x reader #hook imagine #hook fanfiction #hook aew #masochist writes #tyler senerchia #Spotify

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fruitflow · 1 month

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sorry im on anon but im genuinely scared to show my blog. tha might discredit what im about yo say but i feel like you should know about this. there’s a group of your mutuals/friends who are planning an attack on you. im not sure if theyr all your mutuals but i know from looking at your account that you reblog from them. they added me to a group chat on discord a few weeks ago and they’ve been trying to obtain your ip address and location. i haven’t left this group chat because im afraid they’ll try to do the same to me and im worried if i directly say their names they’ll figure out who i am. im sorry i would say more if i wasnt scared. im scared even sending this but i feel gross seeing the things they say without you knowing and i fear youre safet as well. please keep yourself safe. im sorry. i

man fuck you for this. i have severe paranoia over an old ex friend who actively used to stalk me on tumblr, who also is still friends with people from an old group chat, which is why i had to move to this blog in the first place. this ask made me instantly panic and go into fight or flight mode. i was so convinced for a few minutes that they found me again and that i was in genuine danger. im so fucking pissed off why do you think this is a funny copypasta to send to people this was the FIRST THING i saw upon waking up. go kill yourself im not joking

#sorry i know im overreacting but im genuinely really negatively triggered now #lol!! so funny!!! never do this shit to me again

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beardedmrbean · 7 months

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You know the whole 'Hi we have the cure for cancer but we're not going to share it with the world' awful, literally. Mythos thing about Wakanda made notice something

The cure was cancer was definitely not a silver age thing

It stated Kirby made Wakanda (though their advance technology was a later on addition) because he was tired of poverty porn Africa

And Wakanda xenophobia was acknowledged, because I learn there a page in a silver age comic where an African American character went “what’s up brother!” to a Wakandan

And the Wakandan him a “mute”

Now here my theory because when your…ancestors went to Europe for the world wars

Actually I think a lot of white Americans (especially poor ones) had a fetishized view of Europe. And they probably had they until WW1 where many had a one in a lifetime experience to meet Europeans

Then the Europeans immediately pointed out that Americans are foreign to Europe as a Chinese person.

Which definitely broke the illusion of Europe and lead to our modern American identity

Make sense?

So sliver writers probably took that account with doing black panther Mythos

Now the cure for cancer thing, oh I got my suspicions but I think older comic readers can help

But in the 00’s there was two black writers one named Houdini and the other Christopher Priest

Now I vauge on Houdini, but him and priest had that “WE WUZ KINGS” mindset

So they pushed the advance Wakanda shit…while saying that it’s a okay that Wakanda is xenophobic as fuck.

Actually I’m going to do a part to, but I notice something with black Americans writers when they get their hands on stuff.

Oh btw for Priest, well MCU Wakanda was heavily based off his run….

But Priest and the creator of boondocks had a falling out

To the point McGrunder took a piss out of him in a boondocks episode

Oh, priest had black panther beat silver surfer by using a wrestling move….so you can guess his mindset….Im not better with some crazy shit he tried to pull at dc in the 2010’s…no sir ree…

Actually I think a lot of white Americans (especially poor ones) had a fetishized view of Europe. And they probably had they until WW1 where many had a one in a lifetime experience to meet Europeans Then the Europeans immediately pointed out that Americans are foreign to Europe as a Chinese person. Which definitely broke the illusion of Europe and lead to our modern American identity

Never thought about it that way, though there is a lot of genetic memory in Americans we have tried to keep where we came from with ourselves to a degree, or at least some of us do.

Go find the local Greek community or little Saigon, Chinatown, Little Italy, and so on.

(relevant tangent time)

Guy named Andrew Doro (looked it up) made a splash several years back by chronicling his journey to eat food from every country in the world without leaving NYC, got his blog, and IG, looks like he's still going most recent post is from 5 days ago.

Older interview here

Not something you can do in Billings Montana but it's a cool project.

But ya some of us have done our best to keep the "old world" alive in our new home, you also get the families that came over and assimilated themselves forcibly.

Or you get mutts like me who's family roots go back before the revolution in some parts and while I know what my DNA says I also know that I'm American and not Irish or German.

Probably a good deal of what you were talking about going on in the aftermath of WW1 and 2 for sure, GI's staged in England before D-Day which was close enough to the US to not throw them but I'm sure folks had some culture shocks seeing the "old world" first hand.

We also can't forget

I imagine some weebs have a similar experience.

As for the comic stuff I am not well enough versed in those to even say which is golden or silver age, I just recall that there was a deal with them holding on to the cure for cancer.

Mostly brought up when you'd get people talking about how great Wakanda was and their only experience was MCU, which is lots of people for lots of the characters in the MCU.

Had someone spouting off that Captain America wouldn't use guns, just his shield like steven universe, double dumb because he was shown using guns in The First Avenger.

But I'm sure I have a fair number of followers that will have the information on that and hopefully one or more of them adds it here or if they want to send it as a ask that works too.

Honestly my biggest issue with MCU BP was people thinking that either Wakanda was real or it's what Africa would have been like if not for colonialism.

Which both things are insane just for different reasons.

#zoomer huey anon

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bonniebird · 2 years

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Yelena x Reader

Requested by Anon

December event

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“You’re sure?” Yelena asked. She nodded and sighed then hung up the phone. You had sat on the sofa and watched her hopefully but she shook her head. “They think a few more weeks.”

“You’re sure?” You asked and she nodded.

“Sorry that your Christmas plans are ruined but at least you’re not going to be assassinated or anything.” She offered with a smile. You sighed and nodded.

“It was just dinner with some friends.” You muttered quietly. Yelena watched you get up from the faded sofa and go to the bedroom of the safe house. The next morning you woke to cold throughout the safe house. Feeling like you didn’t want to ever get up again you pulled the covers up over your head and went back to sleep. When you woke there was a pleasant smell and the house was warm. You slowly got up. As you did something on the foot of the bed fell off. Picking it up you found a parcel wrapped in brown paper and newspaper pages. A note stuck to the front from Yelena said ‘put on when you get up.’

Opening the package you found a set of warm pyjamas that were so soft to the touch you stroked over the fabric several times.

When you came out with them on you spotted Yelena n a matching pair but in green instead. She was cooking something on the stove and there was something in the oven which glowed warmly. The fireplace had a large fire in it and it filled the small living room warmly. Snowflakes made out of newspaper were stuck all over the walls and ceiling. Empty packets of cheap dollar store stars were on the side. When you looked closely you saw they were stuck to the ceiling.

“Ah! You’re up. The store was out of holiday stuff but they had macaroni.” She almost sang the word macaroni as she stirred the pot on the stove. “It’s just box stuff but I found some extras to add in. I got some other supplies too. Nat is calling soon to tell us when the next supply drop is.”

The two of you watched an old movie on tv. It was small and boxy, every now and then a line of white ran down the screen. The two of you ate until a device Yelena had turned on just before serving dinner beeped. She answered it and the faces of Natasha and Melina were projected onto the wall.

“Hey. We’re going to have to move you again.” Nat said. You could see that they were in a car.

“When?” Yelena asked. Natasha shrugged and sighed.

“Maybe tomorrow. The day after. I’d stay packed up at any rate. You never know when these things could change.” Natasha paused to look at a building covered in lights as they passed by. “How's your holiday going?” She asked as she looked back at her phone.

“Good.” You answered quickly. “Sorry, you couldn’t do your usual plans. But urm. We were able to collect some of your gifts from other people. Some special food is being sent to the next safe house. We’re trying to head back to ours now. We lost them again. But we’ll know more soon.” She continued.

"Um. We’re clearly having a superior holiday moment because we’re wearing matching jammies." Yelena said suddenly when the conversation dropped off. When it had begun Sam had come to the door, hurried you into a car and taken you to the first safe house. Bucky had arrived a few hours later and they’d both said you’d be home by the end of the day. But the time had stretched on month after month. Yelena had taken over staying with you when whoever had threatened you caught on that Sam and Bucky were with you.

“Yes! Look.” You stood so the machine could show Natasha your matching outfits. She laughed as you and Yelena preened and showed off.

Yelena tags:

@lovelyy-moonlight @stellasblog @DeanWinchestersgirl87 @thekayarlene @linkpk88 @babypink224221 @lisainhell @spiderwebs-blog @gryffindorqueensworld @rockyrascal @twerp8999 @justice-for-the-kaldorei @favmeyou @skinny-bitch-juice @salemsnothere @supernatural-wolfie @sentimentalweasley @why-am-I-here-01 @maxineswritingcenter @love1deandra @archaeologydigit @im-eating-rn @bucketbunny @multifandomwriter56 @littlefreakingfangirl @thebookisbtr @bluejaysaysstuff @lchufflepuffcorn @Kaitieskidmore1 @stupendousbelieverzombie @thebaileybugle @bluejaysaysstuff @slxthxrxn-sxmp @hc-geralt-23 @maplefire18

#yelena belova #yelena belova x reader #bonniebird #december2022

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korealog · 2 months

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(2) Like a Daydream (ENG/DE) — Saturday, 27.07.24

(ENG)

So, now I really need to catch up here. On Saturday, I went to the War & Women's Human Rights Museum at around 10am. The museum shows everything from the time when Japanese soldiers took young girls, usually aged 13 to 18, to so-called comfort stations. Mostly under the pretence that they had good jobs and were well paid. However, they never arrived at this new place of work. If you can't imagine what ‘comfort women’ are, here's a brief explanation. In German, they are also known as ‘comfort women’. War is not nice for anyone, so in order to distance themselves from reality, the girls in these ‘comfort stations’ were sexually & physically abused. Over several months to years. The exhibition shows old evidence, such as the recordings of these wards or tickets to get into the comfort wards. When the war was over, the women remained silent, too ashamed of what they had experienced there. Until one of them dared to tell her story! More and more women went public and revealed the truth. To this day, the families of the victims are still fighting for Japan to officially apologise and admit what happened. The museum was very moving and makes you think a lot. Because it wasn't just back then that something like this happened. Unfortunately, there are still cases like this today, all the more reason to fight for justice together! After that, I went back to Hongdae. Once again it rained like crazy out of the blue, so I sat down in one of the cafés and wrote a blog entry. After about an hour, I set off again & promptly got stuck at the next street performance. Again, I must have spent 2 hours watching the dancers. Then I got a bit hungry & ordered ramen in the next restaurant. Around 10 pm, life really got going here in Hongdae. Young people flocked in all directions, queuing at clubs or gathering in the photo studios. I also dared to go to a club this time. The music was mega and so was the atmosphere. Everyone was singing along, jumping up and down and just having a good time. I also made a few new friends in the club and then made my way home at around 1am. The night was pleasantly warm so I promptly decided to hire a bike and cycle home for about 40 minutes. That was the best decision I could have made. Despite the fact that Seoul doesn't really sleep, the Hangang River was surprisingly peaceful and the ride along the riverbank made my head go completely silent. Just cycling, not thinking about anything. I finally got to bed around 2am and quickly found myself in dreamland. In the next few days there will be a couple of entries! I'll be back in Germany by then and have to get back to my vocational school. Well, duty calls, doesn't it?

Until the next entry xo

(DE)

So, jetzt muss ich aber wirklich mal etwas aufholen hier. Am Samstag ging es für mich gegen 10 Uhr ins „War & Women‘s Human Rights Museum“. Das Museum zeigt alles von der Zeit, in der japanische Soldaten junge Mädchen von meist 13 bis 18 Jahren in sogenannte Comfort Stationen verschleppt haben. Das ganze sogar meist unter dem Vorwand, sie hätten gute Arbeit und werden gut bezahlt. An diesem neuen Arbeitsort sind sie dennoch nie angekommen. Wenn ihr euch nichts unter dem „Comfort-Women“ vorstellen könnten, kommt jetzt eine kurze Erklärung. Im Deutschen nennt man sie auch „Trostfrauen“. Der Krieg ist für niemanden schön, um sich also von der Realität zu entfernen wurden die Mädchen in diesen „Comfort-Station“ sexuell & physisch missbraucht. Das über mehrere Monate bis Jahre. Die Ausstellung zeigt alte Beweismittel, wie die Aufzeichungen dieser Stationen oder Tickets um in die Comfort-Stationen rein zu kommen. Als der Krieg vorbei war, haben die Frauen geschwiegen, zu beschämt darüber, was sie dort erlebt haben. Bis sich eine getraut hat ihre Geschichte zu erzählen! Immer mehr Frauen gingen in die Öffentlichkeit und offenbarten die Wahrheit. Bis heute kämpfen die Familien der Opfer darum, dass Japan sich offiziell entschuldigt & das Geschehene zugibt. Das Museum war sehr bewegend und bringt einen sehr zum Nachdenken. Denn nicht nur damals ist so etwas vorgefallen. Auch noch heute gibt es leider solche Fälle, ein Grund mehr gemeinsam für Gerechtigkeit zu kämpfen! Danach ging es für mich nochmal nach Hongdae. Es hat wieder mal aus heiterem Himmel wie verrückt geregnet, also habe ich mich erstmal in eines der Cafés gesetzt & einen Blogeintrag geschrieben. Nach ungefähr einer Stunde bin ich wieder losgezogen & prompt bei der nächsten Street-Performance hängen geblieben. Auch hier sind es bestimmt 2 Stunden gewesen, in denen ich den Tänzern zugeschaut habe. Dann wurde ich etwas hungrig & habe mir im nächsten Restaurant Ramen bestellt. Gegen 22 Uhr ging hier in Hongdae erst richtig das Leben los. Junge Menschen strömen in alle Richtungen, stehen an Clubs an oder sammeln such in den Fotostudios. Auch ich habe mich diesmal getraut in einen Club getraut. Die Musik war mega und die Stimmung ebenso. Alle haben mitgesungen, sind auf und abgehüpft und hatten einfach eine gute Zeit. Im Club habe ich auch ein paar Bekanntschaften gemacht & mich dann gegen 1 Uhr auf den Weg nach Hause gemacht. Die Nacht war angenehm warm also habe ich prompt beschlossen mir ein Fahrrad zu leihen und circa 40 Minuten nach Hause zu radeln. Das war die beste Entscheidung, die ich hätte machen können. Trotz das Seoul nicht wirklich schläft, war es am Hangang River erstaunlich friedlich und die Fahrt am Ufer entlang hat meine Kopf ganz still gemacht. Nur Rad fahren, an nichts denken. Gegen 2 Uhr war ich dann ich endlich im Bett und habe mich ganz schnell im Traumland wiedergefunden. In den nächsten Tagen werden immer mal ein paare Einträge kommen! Bis dahin bin ich schon wieder in Deutschland und muss wieder der Berufsschule nachkommen. Tja die Pflicht ruft, nicht wahr?

Bis zum nächsten Eintrag xo

#south korea #travel #seoul #busking #hongdae

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daemondaemon · 1 year

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IM BACK BITCHES

The situation: I used this blog up until about 8 or 9 months ago, when i was banned. I then moved to the blog @trenchweather, until that blog was ALSO banned. Both blogs ended up getting unbanned so i moved to trenchweather because this one was still kinda glitchy I used trenchweather for several months until about a week ago when that account was banned also (i have now been banned from this website 3 times), and i was gonna just wait for them to give it back, but they still have not and at this point i need tumblr back so i am going back to this old blog, which i think ill stick with for now if i can move my like 3 non shared mutuals over here for reference i had the pfp above (i am sorry its so big harry jumpscare)

sorry i disappeared, staff despises me, im here now!

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rubythecrimsonwriter · 2 years

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I posted 3,545 times in 2022

That's 1,053 more posts than 2021!

354 posts created (10%)

3,191 posts reblogged (90%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@thatpunnyperson

@sincerelylittleone

@whobee7

@floralflowerpower

@thelockenessmonster

I tagged 1,176 of my posts in 2022

#personal - 155 posts

#laugh rule - 104 posts

#pjo - 27 posts

#ruby's moving woes - 26 posts

#batman - 17 posts

#danny phantom - 16 posts

#flipping legacies - 16 posts

#'swearing' - 14 posts

#storytime - 12 posts

#jason todd - 10 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#you know in the very beginning of the pandemic there were people going around with pool noodles attached to their heads to enforce the six f

My Top Posts in 2022:

So I now live in a place where putting cream on my skin is not only normal but expected, because fuck desert climates, but sometimes i cannot STAND the texture. My skin is now telling me ''im itchy i need cream'' but i also know that as soon as I touch cream my entire skin entity will crawl right off my frame and escape into the night.

Thank you, texture issues. You make life interesting, if nothing else.

94 notes - Posted April 30, 2022

We all know that Batman used to laugh during Jason's era as Robin, but I think that at least the first month or so that laughter was mostly a, "what the fuck is up with this kid" kind of laughter. Like Jason is so astonishingly different from Dick as Robin (Dick: *wants to kill someone so bad he's got a severe case of Stupid and Bruce just wants him to Sit and Stay* Jason: "Robin gives me magic!!!" 🤩) that Bruce just has like No coping mechanisms for Jason lmao. The first three weeks is Bruce just going, "what the fuck? Dick didn't do that. what do you mean I'm not going to have to nag him about homework. Oh my god this teenager thinks that--yuuuup, those are rocket propelled rollerskates. Oh look, the inevitable crash." I'd be wtf laughing too if i went from 2008 MCR emo child to ray of sunshine, introduced by way of incredible ballsiness followed immediately by half assed violence and stray-cat-esque coaxing from Bruce. I'd think I was in a fever dream ngl.

143 notes - Posted May 28, 2022

Rewatching Phineas and Ferb has honestly just highlighted how much of a good guy Jeremy is. He adores Candace no matter how weird he clearly thinks she is, thinks her brothers are cool even while she's desperately trying to bust them, and, whenever she has spent the entire episode trying to be there with Jeremy until she can't STAND it any longer and goes haring off after the boys, he's just chilling in the dust and saying, "that's my girl."

172 notes - Posted March 13, 2022

Phineas and Ferb astounds me with how funny it continues to be. We've estblished Linda Flynn-Fletcher as the old pop star Lindonna, and then she likes to play jazz with two other women in the neighborhood. Imagine if Nina Sky (one hit wonder of the 2000s: Move Ya Body) had a quiet jazz trio in the middle of the suburbs of this city and dropped an album and you're just like, ah, yes, soothing jazz by Nina Sky.

And track three is a hard rock song with the lead male singer ranting to Nina about how evil their siblings are and all the rest of the tracks are back to soothing jazz. You flip over the CD case to read the back.

3. E. V. I. L. B. O. Y. S. Sung by Nina Sky's daughter. Music by Nina Sky's jazz trio.

I think that I'd be simultaneously laughing myself sick and also extremely confused.

323 notes - Posted September 3, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

I think people need to tell more kids that they're proud of them for graduating high school. I'm absolutely dead serious, especially now. I can see the graduating high schoolers surrounding me right now are burned out and traumatized and depressed, and they've undoubtedly had a much, much harder time in high school than I ever had, and I had some pretty shitty high school experiences.

I graduated high school with no more acknowledgement than the standard "congrats on surviving another year of school!" And immediately followed by "have you finished all your scholarship applications?" That was fine for me. I knew i wanted to go to college, I was set and ready for it, eager to get out of high school into more challenging courses.

But if I just finished high school after two years of fighting through online courses and no one acknowledged the battles I went through? If I was as burnt out and traumatized as these kids are right now? I'd have never have gone to college.

So for everyone graduating high school, even if you barely scraped by passing: I see you. I'm proud of you. You did such a good job. I wish you success in what you try to do, fortune enough to keep you safe and happy, and health always.

46,794 notes - Posted May 13, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #I love that my pnf posts are the ones that made the top five popular #I'm okay with that

6 notes · View notes

ggourmetsoda · 5 months

Text

i was a avid tumblr user during the prime years of 2015-2018, and i remember tumblr being a second home for me. i had several accounts, never had more than 20 followers, never more than 6 notes on a post, but it was safe here. it was loving and funny and silly here. i was almost strictly a desktop user and i hold the opinion that desktop tumblr is still superior, but it's nice to see that they've updated the mobile version to be at least usable.

im not sure why i left. i have a few theories: i wanted to grow an art account, and it just wasnt happening on tumblr. tbf, my art wasnt much good until about 2018, and i dont blame the platform for not growing. that was mostly me. i was 14-17. 🤷🏻‍♀️

the other reason i think i left was because of embarrassment. imagine all of your interests from the years 2015-2018 piled up all in one place....yeah. no thx. i did tumblr rping as well....happy to separate myself from that, too. i tried out Instagram mainly, and have been pretty happy there until recent years.

the ai apocalypse is too much for me. i have a small foot in on instagram in terms of account growth, but with the reels obsession and the algorithmic demand for fanart over original art, i just cant handle it anymore. they've changed the search bar into an Ask Meta AI bar and that was the last straw for me.

so, hello again, tumblr, my old friend. im 23 now, im engaged, we've moved from the midwest to the west coast, i have a degree. im trying the art blog thing again, now with a lot more skill under my belt and a better head on my shoulders. things have changed. i've changed, too, certainly for the better. im probably still going to post on instagram, but let's see how this goes with giving tumblr more attention.

thanks for having me. ♥️

#talking #dont mind me #mostly being nostalgic

0 notes

itsdanii · 4 years

Note

Ahhh, your rejecting and regretting series is so good, my heart 🥺❤️ Can you do another one but with kuroo and kenma? You can ignore this request if you don’t wanna do it, I love your writing style and your blog! Stay safe and have a good day! 💞💞

Hey, bub! Thank you so much for the kind words, I appreciate it ♥️ I hope you don't mind me doing this only for Kenma. I got carried away so it got quite longer than I intended 🤦‍♀️ Anyway, here's your request! I hope you like it ♥️ Have a good day, stay safe and hydrated! Mwah!

a/n: read the note on the last part.

Rejecting and Regretting 6

genre: angst to fluff

warning/s: cursing, do message me if i missed any

a/n: please do read the warnings before you proceed. warnings have been put there for a reason.

ft. timeskip!kenma kozume

title says it all

Masterlist | Updates

Kenma Kozume

When you moved in to your apartment, you never expected your neighbor to be THE Kenma Kozume

If truth be told, you've been a fan of his ever since he started streaming

You knew that he didn't know you nor would he pay attention to you so you did not bother telling him that you were a big fan - the first one to always comment when he starts streaming

Not only did you think that it may make him uncomfortable but also make him feel like you were only trying to befriend him for his reputation

One night, as you were coming back from a short trip to the grocery store, you were walking with your earphones in and nose pointed on the screen while rewatching one of his videos

What you didn't know was that Kenma was walking behind you and was actually staring as you smiled and giggled while watching

You almost squealed when a hand came on your shoulder, almost punching the person behind you

Oddly, that was the starting point of your friendship

Although Kenma was hesitant at first (duh, you almost punched him) , he slowly eased when he felt that you were genuine

You basically went from neighbors to roommates because of how often you went to his unit, just playing random games and having occasional sleepovers

It wasn't long then when you realized that your "fangirling" towards the streamer developed into something more

You realized that you were no longer looking at him as the Kodzuken of the gaming world but just Kenma Kozume

You knew that you were fucked and thus you tried hiding it, but no matter how hard you tried, you couldn't

So you came up with a solution - confess. You decided that you would take the leap, confess, and hope that everything would turn out well, not knowing that it was only one sided

You shifted from one foot to another as you waited for Kenma to open the door of his unit.

Earlier, you both planned another sleepover and you took the initiative to cook dinner for the two of you instead of ordering another takeout.

As you waited, you could feel your stomach grumbling as the scent of the freshly baked sushi wafted in the air.

To be honest, you weren't really a good cook but you taught yourself how to with the help of youtube and cookbooks. You weren't even planning on learning how to do it but you were getting bored of takeouts, plus, you also wanted to impress Kenma even for a bit.

When the door finally opened, you smiled widely at Kenma while showing the food you made.

"Told you to not bother knocking and just make your way inside," he muttered before taking the pan from you and letting you in.

"Unlike you, I have my manners, Kozume," you playfully said as you plopped yourself on the couch head first.

Hearing him mumbling something under his breath as he arranged the table, you propped your elbow on the couch to watch him with a small pout playing on your lips. Your eyes followed his every movement and you couldn't help but question how someone could look so perfect.

His hair was a mess in a half bun and he was wearing nothing fancy, just his old sweatpants and a hoodie. Despite that, he still managed to look like a model, specifically those who preferred the "woke up like this" look.

"Y/n, are you going to eat or not?"

You blinked your eyes when you noticed the frown plastered on Kenma's face. Immediately, you stood up and walked over to the table with a small blush on your cheeks after being caught daydreaming.

"Sorry," you said sheepishly.

Kenma's apartment was then filled with the sounds of utensils clanking and small conversations the two of you were sharing.

Even though it seemed like Kenma wasn't paying attention, you knew that he was listening. You were aware of how much he preferred listening and observing more than talking anyway. It's just that you wished that he would talk more around you.

Somewhere in your conversation, you tried hinting your feelings towards him. In fact, you think that it was pretty obvious, but it seemed like Kenma didn't notice - that or he was purposely avoiding to indulge you.

"Getting in a relationship with a fan isn't boring you know? It actually sounds exciting, to be honest."

At that, Kenma heaved a sigh which instinctively made you shut up.

His eyes were already casted on the food infront of him instead of you, eyebrows furrowed as if he was suddenly put in a bad mood. "I dont... really like this topic," Kenma said with a dismissive tone.

You felt your heart drop upon hearing that.

You've already practiced your confession several times and there was no way you'd let such words discourage you that easily. All you knew was that you had to get it out of your chest - now or never.

You placed your utensils down and looked at him straight in the eye despite him trying to avoid your gaze. "Why not, Kozume?" you asked, trying to push him to talk.

"I just don't see the point. Why would you want to date your fan? That's... weird," he simply answered, "What if they don't really like you? There's a high chance that a fan would date their idols because of popularity and fame. It's nothing but a self satisfaction."

"Hmm... I guess you do have a point," you said with a nod.

Placing your elbow on top of the table, chin resting on your palm, you pointed at yourself with your free hand which made Kenma look at you with one eyebrow raised. "Then what if it's me who wants to date you? Im a fan of yours, after all. Would you also reject me?" you asked hopefully.

Without wasting any second, Kenma answered, "Of course. Why would I date you?"

You didn't know how to react upon hearing that. You wanted to believe that he was trying to tease you but there weren't any signs of that from the tone of his voice. Moreover, he had nothing but a serious expression on his face.

"Because I like you," you answered with a low voice.

That simple phrase caused the silence to enevelope the two of you. The anticipation made your hands feel clammy to the point that you had to let go of your utensils to grip the sweatpants your were wearing.

Silently, you stared at each other as if waiting for the other person to break the silence - until Kenma did.

"Well, I don't." Standing up, Kenma took his plate and placed it on the sink, his back turned against you as he continued, "I think I'm going to stream for a bit. Make yourself comfortable."

You stared at Kenma as he made his way to his room wordlessly. "Make myself comfortable? Just who the fuck would say that after rejecting someone?" you muttered under your breath.

Knowing that it would be pointless to distract him while streaming, you started to clean the table and proceeded on washing the plates. As you were doing so, you whispered a curse when a tear suddenly slid down your cheeks.

You weren't supposed to cry. You prepared for this so you should've been able to take the rejection properly, right? He was Kenma Kozume after all. Although you became close with each other, it seemed as if he was really beyond your reach.

And now you ruined the only thing keeping you close to him - your friendship.

You decided to leave his unit after that. You felt that proceeding with the sleepover would only put a tense atmosphere between the two of you. Moreover, he did shut you out, right? Though he told you to make yourself comfortable, the way he acted said otherwise.

Maybe he only said it not to hurt your feelings.

"As if he hadn't already," you murmured, shutting and locking the door behind you.

In hopes of cheering yourself up, you decided to take a warm shower and pamper yourself to he point that skincare products basically littered your vanity when you finished and don't forget the fact that you ended up smelling like a strawberry because of your bodywash.

By the time you went to bed, you were feeling a little better... or were you?

As you laid on your bed, staring at the wall beside you while hugging a pillow close to your chest, your mind suddenly went back to what happened awhile ago.

You thought of how dismissive he seemed towards you. He wasn't always like that. Kenma had always been enthusiastic when you're around. Sometimes you would even end up watching beside him as he streams.

What changed?

Groaning, you buried your face on your pillow when you felt yourself tearing up once again. "Tomorrow will be better," you mumbled against the soft material as you slowly allowed yourself to fall asleep.

It didn't.

In fact, it got worse.

Not only was Kenma avoiding you, he was also acting as if he didn't know you - as if you didn't exist.

Earlier this morning when you were taking the trash out, you waved at him in hopes of lightening up the mood, but instead of usually greeting you, Kenma didn't even spare you a glance. He basically walked pass you without saying anything.

At first, you thought that maybe he didn't see you. Maybe his mind was elsewhere while walking. That could be possible right?

But when it continued for several more days, you realized that he was indeed avoiding you.

You felt a mixture of pain and anger. You were supposed to be the one avoiding him since it was him who rejected you but why was it the other way around? He could've atleast talked to you, let alone smile. Did he not value even just your friendship?

As the days went on, you were slowly getting tired of being the only one to put effort on rekindling your relationship. It was exhausting to keep on chasing over someone who didn't even acknowledged you.

Maybe you were just a bother to him after all.

So despite your will to keep on getting his attention, you decided to stop. If he didn't want you then so be it. You already confessed and did your best to show him that you're genuine. That's all that matters.

Kenma stared at your door beside his intensely, hand mid-air to turn the knob of his own unit.

It had been two weeks since he last saw you and for the third time of the day, he was yet again met with nothing but silence when he tried knocking on your door.

Where were you?

He knew that how he acted towards you was unreasonable but he didn't expected himself to wake up feeling like shit everyday without seeing you. He did this. He pushed you away. He said he didn't like you, right?

Groaning frustratedly, Kenma entered his unit, heading straight to his streaming room to cool off his head. If he couldn't see you personally, then perhaps he could at least see your name on his viewers.

He knew you always watched his stream and how you would always be the first to comment. Sometimes, you would even donate a huge amount of cash as a tip even though you always complained about being broke.

"They're not watching?" Kenma said unconsciously as he noticed how your name wasn't on the list.

That instantly caused a ruckus in his stream's comment section. Several fans kept on asking who Kodzuken was referring to and some even got the right answer since he streamed with you several times already.

But instead of saying anything, Kenma stayed silent. He focused on his game, occasionally shifting his eyes to the comment section and interacting with his fans.

His eyes, however, caught one comment. It was a link with the caption "Isn't this y/n?". Out of curiosity, Kenma decided to check it, finding out that you were indeed the person in the video.

No, it wasn't a video. It was a live stream of someone like him - a player.

And there you were, seated beside the unfamiliar person with a fluffy blanket wrapped around your body and your your head resting on their shoulder.

Who was that and why did you look too comfy?

"Sorry, guys. I'll have to end the stream now. Something important came up," Kenma said with a small wave before ending his stream.

Stalking the other streamer's socials, Kenma frowned upon noticing several pictures of you attached in their instagram. They were even posted just a few days ago which meant that you must've been spending time with them throughout the days you weren't at home.

Something stirred inside Kenma. It was an unpleasant feeling blooming inside his chest, clawing at him and making him realize one important thing.

He was in love with you.

And it was only confirmed when he remembered how nervous he was when you confessed, how scared he was when he heard the door shutting after he rejected you, and how stupid he was for only realizing it now.

"Shit," he whispered to himself as he quickly tapped on his phone, his finger hovering over your number, debating wether or not should he dial.

Suddenly, he shifted his gaze on the monitor of his pc which was still displaying the unfamiliar streamer when he noticed how you snuggled closer to their side.

Muttering anther curse, Kenma clicked on your number, his eyes focused on the montior of his laptop as he watched you picking up your phone.

"Please pick up," he pleaded when he noticed the frown on your face.

It took him a full 5 minutes and several dials to finally make you give in. He watched as you whispered something on the person beside you before making your way out of the room.

On cue, your voice suddenly met his ear.

"Kozume?"

It was still as soft as he could remember and with the fact that he finally admitted his feelings, his cheeks burned when he felt his heart racing.

Say it. Say it.

Say you like her.

"I-" pausing for a moment to rethink his words, Kenma sighed deeply before answering, "I'm sorry for being mean."

Fuck.

He was met with silence from the other side and for a moment, he got scared that you dropped the call.

It was until he heard some rustling sound that he realized you were still there and was purposely trying to stay quiet.

"Can we talk about this in person?" you said with a tiny voice.

Out of panic, Kenma nodded, forgetting that he was ralking to you over the phone and not in person. Mentally smacking himself, he answered, "Yes. I'd prefer that."

And I'd prefer if you're here instead of that caveman's room.

"Then, I'll be there in 20."

The moment Kenma heard someone knocking, he was quick to open the door.

His lips basically parted at the sight of you. It was only two weeks and yet why did it felt like he hadn't seen you in a month?

"Kozu-"

"I'm sorry," he cut you off, arms wrapping around you as soon as you stepped inside his apartment.

He felt how your body became stiff in his hold and without wasting any chance, he poured everything out. "I'm sorry for how I acted towards you. I treated you as if you were the last person I wanted to be with and when I didn't see you for several days, I realized how much I hurt your feelings." He took a deep breath, eyes focusing on you as he gripped your shoulders slightly. "Forgive me? I promise that I'll make it up to you."

Kenma hoped that you could notice the genuineness in his voice. He wasn't the type of person to talk too much but for you, he'd do it if it means having you forgive him and give him another chance.

"It's... alright, Kozume," you answered with a small smile.

"It's alright?" Kenma asked slowly. He knew that he should be happy that you forgave him easily but the way you said it made it seem like you were only forcing yourself.

It's like you didn't mean it.

"W-what do you mean it's alright?" he repeated.

"It means exactly what it means. I don't really see the point of holding a grudge against you, you know? You rejected me and I accepted it." Shrugging your shoulders, you walked pass him and went to sit on the couch. "I guess I just got too ahead of myself. I mean, you're Kenma Kozume, the Kodzuken of the gaming world. It would be impossible for you to like me, right? Sorry if I made you uncomfortable with my confession."

Kenma swallowed the lump forming inside his throat, eyes darting away from your figure as he shook his head no. "No... That's not true."

"What do yo-"

"I like you. How could you ever think that low of yourself?" he said, finally looking at you before he walking towards your direction. "It's not Kodzuken to you, y/n. Kozume - just Kozume. I don't want you to think that I'm someone all high and mighty just because people acknowledge me. I don't care about that. I want you. I want you to look at me the same way you did before. I want you to keep on clinging to me and to keep on cooking for me despite not knowing how to. I want you to like me again. I just want you.."

You felt your eyes well up with tears. After a long time of pining over someone you thought you wouldn't be able to reach, it was finally here - the moment you finally manage to hear the words you've longed to hear from him.

"D-do you mean that?" you asked with a small sob, your hand covering your face as you felt yourself being lifted and placed on Kenma's lap. "What if you're only saying that to make me feel better?"

"Of course I mean it. I was too stupid being scared of acknowledging my feelings towards you that I ended up rejecting you. I'm sorry." Gently, Kenma rubbed your back as he kept you in his arms, words of apologies continue slipping past his lips as he waited for you to stop crying.

"If I told you I still like you, would you promise not to treat me like shit again?" you asked while wiping your cheek with the back of your hand. "You were really mean to me, Kozu."

"I'd promise," Kenma answered with a nod.

Looking at him, you sniffled one more time. "Then I still like you," you said without taking your eyes off him.

You didn't fail to notice how Kenma's cheeks turned a lighter shade of red and the thought of how he got more flustered by your second confession than the fact that you were seated on his lap made you smile a little.

"Oh," Kenma uttered, as if suddenly not knowing how to react.

"You're supoosed to kiss me like those cliche movies," you said while encircling your arms around his neck.

Kenma's blushed even deeper after hearing that. Gulping, he gave a stiff nod before leaning in and finally planting his lips on yours.

His lips were soft against yours. Despite how tense he was at the beginning, he slowly managed to relax, fingers interlocking with your hair as he kept on moving his lips in synch with yours, both of your eyes closed as you savored the moment.

You felt yourself smiling in your kiss as you realized something - no longer were you just a fan but his s/o.

If you're reading this, hello.

I've decided that this will be the last part of the rejecting and regretting series. Though I had a lot of fun writing these, I'm no longer satisfied with how I'm writing them. The scenes were slowly becoming repetitive as well as the words. I'm craving for something new- something fresh that I've yet to explore. It was quite overwhelming how much people loved this series and I'm very thankful for that so I feel a little bad that this would be the last one. Don't worry, I still have some stuff brewing up that I hope you'd all enjoy.

Thank you so much for the love, support, and most importantly, for reading the series up until this last one. ♥️

1K notes · View notes

pokenimagines · 2 years

Note

NSFW - N drabble? fic?

HII im so excited to see your requests open again :D i really loved the one you did with emmett and i was wondering if you could do something kiiinda similar but with n? like reader has had a big crush on n forever and they finally act on it 😳😳 thanks in advance hope ur day is going well :)

I actually had to go back and read the Emmett one because I totally forgot I wrote him before LOA came out. Honestly I forget like 90% of the stuff I've written. I've come across some really old smut I've written and as I read it I'm like "This is familiar, maybe I've read this one." and then I see the creator was me.

Also this fic is longer because I absolutely adore N and this has a lot of 'firsts' for him and like. Consent is important!

Discord (16+) - Request Information

Warning: This is NSFW so if you’re under the legal age or uncomfortable with content like this, please skip over this one!

NSFW N: Firsts

Pokemon x reader

Pokemon

Reader

Reader Insert

X Reader

Fanfiction

Imagines

Headcanons

Request

Request Blog

Pokemon Fanfiction

N was a little bit of everything in all honesty. Kind and sentimental. He got along with pokemon amazingly and you knew he'd never invite you to parties so your little introverted heart wouldn't need to deal with it. He was also always so gentle with everyone and everything, like he was afraid he would harm them. This included you to a sever degree and honestly you couldn't complain about it.

The gentle touch to your lower back as he moves you away from crowds, the soft touch to your hand when he wants to grab it. It was absolutely no wonder you fell hard for this boy. He treated you right and he was handsome to boot. There was only on thing coming between you two.

Neither of you wanted to be the one to confess. Neigh, neither of you knew how to go about it. Dancing around the topic became a past time for you two as you tried to figure it all out. Who'd be the one to break first?

"Hey N." You said, rolling over to your side. You two had decided to do some late night stargazing after looking for some drifloon. N turned his head, but not rolling over completely.

"Hm?" He didn't bother replying and you could see his half lidded eyes. You two would probably be calling it a night soon with how tired you two were getting. N never wanted to be the one to go home first though, always wanting to spend a little more time with you.

"What uh...what are we?' You said, swallowing a lump in your throat and averting your gaze. You decided that if someone had to break, it would probably need to be you. After all, N was too polite and might not have caught on to your over obvious feelings.

"What do you mean?" His voice wavered just enough that you caught it. Clearly he knew exactly what you meant but was going to tiptoe around it. Just like always.

"Like...so we are always hanging out together and there's this tension there and I just...listen N I like you way more than just a friend..." You said, not knowing how to really explain it. Best to be straight forward with him.

"More than a friend? What would you like to be, then?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"That depends on what you think of me. If you want to be just friends then I'm totally cool with that." a complete lie on your part, "But if you happen to have similar feelings then..."

"Then?"

"Maybe we could move forward and be a couple?" You finally got it out.

"A couple...don't we already do all the things that couples do?" He asked, getting on his elbows now and getting a better view of your face that had now turned scarlet.

"Well the dates and hand holding...yes. But couples do way more. Like kissing and..." You stopped yourself as you looked at him. It hadn't been that long ago that he was basically trapped in an organization that sheltered him. He was awkward around other humans and didn't know much about how the world worked. Would he even know about sex?

"Kissing and?" He tried getting you to say it and you bit your lip.

"Like...sex and stuff." You couldn't help but feel overly awkward at this. It wasn't a foreign concept to you but the thought of possibly having to explain it to N was daunting.

"Ah sex...I remember the triplets telling me about it." He said, "It's between people who love one another, right?" He asked and you nodded. "I wouldn't mind that, I do love you after all." Your heart was in your throat at his confession.

"I uh...I love you too. Are you sure though? Do you know everything it entails?" You asked him, hoping for the best.

"They...explained it." N said with a bright blush grazing his pale cheeks, "And showed me some videos."

"Oh my arceus they showed you porn..." You murmured, covering your eyes and trying not to laugh. "Well uh...that's a good start. I wouldn't mind if we took things slow though. Have you ever uh jacked off? Masturbated?"

"I don't recall having ever done that." N replied sheepishly.

"So you're probably going to be sensitive." You didn't want to throw him into the deep end before he understood what sexual pleasure even felt like. "N...do you trust me to show you something regarding sex? You're free to say no and if you do agree we can stop at any moment."

"What do you have in mind?" N seemed just as nervous as you did. You took in your surroundings and were happy to find that there weren't any people or pokemon out and about. You two had found a relatively peaceful clearing so here was as good as anywhere.

"I want to give you an orgasm." You said, "If you'll let me."

N paused as his face went bright. He was sitting up properly now as he scratched the back of his head. "I don't mind." There was your go.

You sat up and crawled over to him, sitting down on his lap. He paused, not knowing what to do. You just smiled and grabbed his hands, placing them on your hips.

"Let's start with a kiss." You said as you brought his face closer to your own. He watched him swallow a lump in his throat and soon you connected your lips.

It started off slow and gentle, N not knowing what to do. Soon he was moving his lips in time with your own, picking up pretty fast on what you were showing him. Your hips went and grinded down on him, feeling his cock now half hard in his pants just from kissing you.

N groaned against your mouth as the friction, opening his mouth a tad and you took the opportunity to snake your tongue in. N easily gave into you, moaning into the kiss and bucking his hips up against you. He was getting harder faster than you thought just from a little kissing and you couldn't be more pleased.

You two separated and you took no time in kissing along his jawline and then to his neck. He was squirming underneath you, panting out your name under his breath.

"You're so beautiful like this, N...do you want to keep going?" You asked and he could only nod. "N, I need you to speak to me. Is this okay?" Your hand slowly snaked between the two of you, moving over his erection through is pants.

"Y-yes this is fine." He moan, arching into your grasp. You unzipped his pants and dug through his boxers until you were able to pull his hard dick out. The top was flushed a dark red and almost looked painful.

You swiped your thumb over the precum forming at the top and used that as lube as you slowly began to stroke him. He whimpered a bit, but bucked up into your grasp as his hands both were grasping your hips in a death grip.

"You're doing so good for me." You murmured, going back to locking your lips with his. You felt his warm length twitching in your hands and N let out a high pitched and breathy moan as he came between your two bodies.

"A-arceus..." He moaned out, slumping up against you as he caught his breath. You smiled and moved his sweaty bangs from his forehead and gave him a kiss.

"Did that feel good?" You asked, already knowing the answer.

"Felt wonderful...can we do this again sometime?" He asked as he looking up at you. You brought your hand that was coated in his cum and dragged your tongue over it, collecting some of his seed. You swallowed, deciding you liked the taste of him.

N's face was scarlet as he watched you do that and you chuckled, "Whenever you want. I actually have more things we could try later on..." the thought of blowing him made your mouth water.

"I'd uh...I'd like that."

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faithfulhound · 2 years

Text

Life Update

Hey y'all -

I know I haven't replied to anyone in a very long time. Long even for me. It's a bit of a story, and still not one I'm sure I'm ready to tell/talk about. Things are hard right now, and they've been hard for awhile. And I've put off saying anything on my RP blogs because I knew I'd probably have to post stuff in several places and I just wasn't up for that.

First - I'm not going anywhere. I just needed more time than I thought I would need. I may still need time; I'm not sure. But I'm working to be back here and keep writing with those of you who still want to write with me.

Back when things first started to happen, I wanted to share with my partners why I'd gone abnormally quiet, but the thought of telling everyone individually was numbing, and even the thought of making a post and reblogging it a bunch of places didn't sit well with me, so I just didn't do it.

It was that choice to not communicate with y'all that brought me to the realization that I needed to fix how I roleplayed. I recognized that the number of blogs I had was a detriment to my enjoyment of this hobby. I’ve spent so much time jumping from one blog to another to try and keep up with everything that I wasn't able to stay and enjoy the things my partners were sharing on their own blogs. And when I had things I needed to tell y'all, there wasn't an efficient way to do it. But I realized I could change that. And I intend to.

I'm making a multi-muse blog. It will house all of the muses I want to keep, and any I might decide to add along the way. It's about halfway done right now, but I try to work on it a little every day. With over 30 muses to add, the task is definitely a daunting one.

My plan, right now, is this: If we're currently writing together I'll follow your blog/blogs with the multimuse as soon as everything is completed. If you'd like to know what the blog is right now and pre-follow, just let me know via IM or Discord. But be aware, part of my preparation involves reblogging things from my old blogs and sometimes it might flood your dash.

For those of you I'm not currently writing with, if you'd like to follow, I'll make a quick post on most of my old blogs directing you to the new one once it's ready. There's no pressure to follow me there, of course. I'm just giving you the option if you enjoy my aesthetic posts, or my writing, or think you might want to write with me at some point in the future. :)

As part of this plan, if I currently owe you a reply, that reply will be posted on the new multimuse when it's ready. I know that means waiting longer, but I'm worried if I don't focus on getting this blog done, it never will be. Please be patient with me. 💜 If you owe me a reply, it's 100% okay to reply like normal to the old blog. Don't worry about the multimuse right now. I want to make this transition as seamless as possible for my partners. I'm planning to have all of my first replies on the multimuse link back to the old thread in case anyone needs refreshing at any point. None of my old blogs are going anywhere; they just won't be active blogs anymore. Except for an occasional post, maybe, to remind people where I've moved to.

Okay - that's everything. If you've read this far, then thank you. <3 Thank you for your friendship, and your patience, and your understanding. If, for some reason, you feel like this change isn't something you can work with, that's okay, too. There won't be any hard feelings on my part. If you can, please let me know. I'd rather part ways on mutually amicable terms than not know your decision and be left to wonder what happened.

Thank you, again, and I hope to see many of you on my new blog once it's ready to go.

~ Mira 💜

P.S. I’ll be reblogging this a handful of other places (but not everywhere), so for those of you who follow me across several blogs, I apologize in advance . 💜

#ooc #update

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ibroughtyoumybullets · 2 years

Note

you got into mcr as an ADULT?

ok wait i think this is from the other night when i let the one direction beast out of her cage but i love telling this story so im answering it late. sorry i don’t look at my inbox enough.

yes!! kind of. <- short answer.

long answer: so i was starting to get into rock music when i was about … 12? my first Band That Was Mine was paramore but after the farro brothers left the band in 2010 i was in search of something else to love. i got into atl (eugh) and the Maine (the loves of my life listen to the maine NOW) and fall out boy (don’t listen to them that much anymore but they were important to my musical development) and that old Ryan Ross and Dallon Weekes project that fell off (weird that they never released anything after v&v? anyhow) and several other bands that were accessible to my little 12 year old brain.

and then one day when i was listening to camisado on YouTube i was looking for other songs that made me Feel The Same and this song by this band called my chemical romance called Mama popped up in the yt recommended sidebar. so I listened to it and was like “wait why is this music scary. this song makes me scared. am i even allowed to listen to this it has the word mama and hell in it am I gonna get in trouble” and got nervous and stopped listening. but i would go back to it every so often and it led me to teenagers which I would listen to when I wanted to feel cool and wttbp which was wholly inaccessible to my 12 year old brain but i still thought was cool anyhow.

and then, later, maybe a couple months later? i was on YouTube watching the what makes you beautiful music video over and over again and this song called NaNaNa came up in recommended. and the music video BLEW MY LITTLE BRAIN AWAY. IT WAS UNLIKE ANYTHING I HAD EVER SEEN BEFORE. the colors and cars and the outfits and the GUITARS and the guns and the lyrics … fucking altered the fabric of my life. so I watched the sing music video and it did the same to me and i was motherfucking INTRUIGED. so I did some googling and saw they had started to release new music. i didn’t really understand the a/b side singles format but I thought maybe this was just a different way bands released albums. so I waited patiently for each single drop - and it wasn’t quite like their other music but it still really interested me.

this, notably, was around the time i started attending concerts. the first real concert I attended was an Ed sheeran show at the house of blues when he was touring his first album and was mostly only known by one direction fans in the US. and I was like … oh this is the coolest thing in the world and I wanna do it all the time. I had tickets to a concert for the Maine in June of that year, 3 days after the time I would see one direction live. So my 13 year old brain was like YES since I am now grown (lol) and a concert goer I will wait until mcr announces a tour for their new music and go and it’ll be great.

and then they broke up. lol.

and i was like. SAD. well there are other bands. and just kind of moved on. there were boy bands to blog about. it wasn’t a huge loss to me. they hadn’t Gotten me yet.

but during the time they were broken up, particularly as I got older, I could never quite listen to them. i would try to occasionally but it just made me sad because I knew I could really love this band and they weren’t around for me to love them and I didn’t feel like setting myself up to love a band I would never see.

but in spring of 2019 I was a sophomore in college, deeply, deeply depressed, and holed up in my room 22 stories up going crazy with insomnia. and my mom texted me and was like “hey me and dad have started watching this show, the umbrella academy. its based off a comic book that was written by Gerard way? Who was in a band? I think you would like it” so I started milking tua dry for hyperfixation serotonin and was watching cast interviews, etc, and then I watched one with Gerard in it. and I was like. oh. it’s you it’s the band guy. maybe I’ll listen to some of your music as a treat.

so I started listening to danger days a lot. i think I needed the color in my life. and i really enjoyed it, especially since I was older and had a better understanding of myself and music. but it still made me sad, you know? i really liked this band but they clearly weren’t ever going to exist again - I mean Gerard clearly had his own stuff going on, and this was before Twitter introduced Topics so I would get Frank’s tweets about his touring in my recommended Twitter feed. the band was dead. so I’d listen to danger days and absorb whatever hope I could from it and walk away better but still sad.

this continued throughout the summer and into the fall.

this is the funniest part of this story: mid October 2019 I was in a parking lot with my friends smoking weed and listening to music. somebody gave me the aux and I put on DD and we had a discussion about our younger and more emo days and i said “I hope you guys know if they ever got back together I would drag you to see them” and they were all like yeah that’s fair.

and then, on Halloween 2019, I was on a train on my way out to visit a friend in college so we could party (I had dropped out LOL) and I was sitting on the train waiting for it to leave the station. i had a whole playlist ready and was getting into the drunk and slutty mood. I opened Twitter one last time before I turned my signal off so I could conserve battery and somebody had tweeted that mcr had gotten back together and I was like. ok not funny. but then I saw another tweet about it. and another. so I cautiously opened the MCR Twitter page and saw it was real. i could not fucking believe it. so i through my playlist out of the window and listened to black parade front to back for the first time in my life, cried a little, had everything change for me.

and then there were days and days where I would listen to all of their albums and tried my best to eat their music alive. I started stalking the MCR tag on tumblr, started following a couple people from mcrblr on my old blog, and began letting myself Love them.

and then there was the shrine and an offering and a summoning and the insanity of accepting I would be able to see them live with my own little eyes. the day tickets dropped I literally left work on my half hour break, went home, fought Ticketmaster, and got tickets for me and my friends. I’d never been so excited.

and there was a plague and several years and in the interim they have become My Band. I’m never going to love another band like this and I don’t want to. im so happy to be here and I’m so happy it happened now, when I’m older and have a better handle on myself and have the ability to chase them around.

so yeah. this was long but so was my journey to them. if I’m weird about my chemical romance it’s just because I had to wait a decade for them and it feels very much like fate to me.

#long post #saved

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dearest-kibble · 3 years

Text

Strings like a noose

Im back babyyyyyyy (and considering moving to A03 cause i cannot run a blog) but have a quick little yandere toshinori! More will be coming either on my A03 or here. Thank you all for bearing with me!

Tw: Stalking (i think that's it but if you see anything else please let me know!)

Without a doubt, you have the worst quirk in the world. Sure other people might have something equally as mediocre; like small sound amplification or the ability to perfect cooking ratios or something like that. But at least those were useful - they did something. But no, your quirk had to get you kidnapped.

Your kidnapper’s honeyed voice likes to tell you how the strings hang like a noose ‘round his neck; beautiful scarlet - satin and silk, intricately laced. His voice sounds familiar but you can’t place it. Why couldn’t your quirk have been something about memory? The bag around your head isn’t uncomfortable, neither is the blindfold and your captor promised to take them both off some day but you don’t think it’s really all that true.

He talks to you sometimes, about other things than his love for you and your quirk. About his day mostly. About how he doesn’t want to blind you so you’re allowed to see sometimes. The only view you ever get is a clean, luxurious bathroom. It smells like the lilac shampoo he uses on your hair.

“I think the kids would like you.” As soon as the door opens the voice begins to speak. The cover is lifted from your head, blindfold still wrapped around your eyes. He starts rubbing your head with a large hand. He does this sometimes.

“I don’t think they’d like you much if I told them what you’re doing.”

“Don’t be like that sweet; they’d love the two of us.” The rubbing turns into affectionate knuckles digging into your skull not nearly enough to hurt but you can tell there's a measure of strength behind it. “They’d love you so much - they must be tired of me.”

“I’m tired of you.” The snarl in your voice elicits a laugh from the voice. It’s a little self deprecating. “Stupid useless quirk. Wish I was never born with it.”

“Seeing other’s connections is a beautiful thing darling! I bet you can help so many with it.”

“It’s so helpful it got me kidnapped.” Oh, that one stung.

“I’m just protecting you, you don’t know what’s out there, even I can’t say for sure and I’m-” “Spit it out already. I’m fucking tired of you being all mysterious. You what, stalked me, hunted me down or whatever? Just tell me who you are. It’s not like I can hate you any more than I already do.” He sighs, lower than you thought possible and you feel your hair suddenly stands on end and the electricity in the air. A meatier hand grazes your cheek for a second - he coughs and it’s back to the boney fingers you're more familiar with. You feel the nails, cut short on your skin as he tugs the blindfold and for the first time, you look upon the face of the man who kidnapped you. Mouth stretched thin, Shaggy golden hair limply framing a gaunt skeleton face with sunken bright blue electrifying eyes. He bears the strongest resemblance to someone you’ve seen and still you can’t place it. He’s malnourished looking as you take more of him in oversized shirts and baggy pants that clearly don’t fit right. He looks homeless quite honestly. Yet your surroundings are anything but. Well furnished, imported goods and very very comfortable looking.

“I was wrong. I think I hate you more now.” And that rings a little hollow to you because even if he kidnapped you, you feel a little sorry for him and his clearly malnourished body.

“Please; don’t be like that. Your quirk sees connections and if I am connected to you than-” All the sympathy you gave him dissipates as he brings up this tired old rhetoric.

“I don’t care. It’s a useless quirk anyway and you took me here against my will. Who are you, the phantom of the opera?” He chuckles at that one.

“No no, I want to protect you; the phantom wanted to own Christine. I could never own you; but protection? I can give you that.”

“In that shrink-wrapped body of yours? I could blow on you and you’d fall over.”

“You can do anything you want to me and I’d crumble.” He puts a hand around his neck. “Even if you don’t know it you need me, that’s why I’m connected to you.” He squeezes and steps closer.

“Stop getting closer.” You sound more panicked than you should, he’s had you for so long and done nothing to you. But you’d never seen how large he was; how wealthy he must be. He stops dead in his tracks.

“Whatever you want, love.” He smiles unthreateningly with blood in his teeth and his thin lips part to show a severely perfect smile before he covers his mouth with a hand and swallows. “I-I’ll get you some food.”

“Get my hands undone then. You’re not going to spoon feed me again. It’s humiliating.”

“Young Bakugou would really take a shine to you I think.”

“I hope he hates you too. You deserve it.”

“Quite the opposite in fact, they all look up to me - or used to. I was quite the charismatic teacher.” More self deprecation. You wondered a long time ago if it was a manipulation technique; but it seems far too ingrained in how he speaks.

“Stop bringing up how “likable” you are. It’s not gonna make me like you. I hate you more than I hate this useless quirk.”

“It doesn’t matter if you hate me.” He shuffles around his kitchen, “Normally I eat out, so you’ll have to forgive my lack of food.” He starts to cobble something together and starts again in his voice. “One of my other students would think your quirk is amazing, please don’t bring yourself down my love; your quirk is why we’re together.”

“And that’s supposed to be a good thing?” He ignores you.

“Once I undo your bindings, you’ll be free to go wherever you want, it was just after the… relocation… I needed to make sure no one could find you. Not that they could keep me from you, I‘ll always know where you are.” He turns on the stove. “It’s such a beautiful quirk, made for love, my love.” He turns, eyes staring into you with blank kindness and shambles towards you on emaciated legs.

“Sto-” The smile on his face widens and widens as you try to speak but fail. “Please..” Another almost breath you let escape. He stands in front of you, hunching so his spine pushes against the back of his shirt, sharp chin digging into the crown of your head. His arms snake around your waist clammy and jutting into your side like rocks. You feel like they weigh you down — into an early grave where someone has already been buried. With that strength that was present earlier he takes a hold of your wrists and pulls. The tape snaps but you hardly feel free.

“You're free to go wherever you want now. Just so long as you come back every night. I’ll get you whatever you need and do whatever you need me too.” It takes you a while to compose your breath but you're sure he’s felt you struggle to catch your breath. So many times.

“But I’m not free to go wherever I want! You always know where I am.” Your hands find their way to your head, digging into your scalp. “How do I know you won’t follow me. You stalked me before you’re gonna do it again.” He’s still hugging you - frozen in place growing colder by the second and coughs. One hand leaves your back and up to his mouth. Pulling away he speaks.

“I’m not always going to be here,” He holds up his hand, mouth open - it never closes - in a grimace. His hand and chin are dripping with blood. “But while I am, I want to do the best I can for you. And what better way than knowing where you always are? I am here. Fear not for anything.” The other hand from your back works it’s way up gently to your head once again petting you. “You can’t see the strings connected to you, right?” You can’t respond anymore, you feel like he’s just smashed your guts. You want to vomit. “They’re beautiful. It’s because you’re beautiful and so is your quirk. I love everything about you.” He sighs deeply and tries to pull your hand from your head “Maybe it’s because I’m supposed to. Maybe I just have the need to protect or help.” He whispers a small ‘I want to save someone again.’ You pretend for your own sake that you don’t hear it. “But whatever the reason, never doubt,” He presses a kiss to your forehead and his fingers filter through your hair, pressing your head to his lips.

“A-all Mi-” He pulls away and rests a finger gently over your lips.

“Shh. I am here.”

#yandere x reader #yandere imagine #yandere #yandere imagines #yandere toshinori yagi #yandere bnha x reader #yandere bnha #yagi toshinori #all might #all might x reader #yandere all might #Yandere all might x reader #tw stalking

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