the law of seat partners | part 2
a/n: ok so the response to part 1 of my first ever eddie blurb has been quite surprising and i've had ideas for a second part while writing it so i guess that's what's happening here now. this part is definitely longer (you're welcome) and will lead to a part 3, so no worries there everyone. i definitely recommend reading part 1 first though to get more context. enjoy and i live for reblogs and comments so i'd appreciate you leaving me some :)
summary: the bus ride continues and so does your feeling that eddie might like you a bit more than the others. also, he eats all most of your snacks and it (among other things) makes you realise that you're down bad for him. also you learn that his hands are just generally quite warm.
cw/tw: more of eddie being a touchy menace while trying real hard to make reader aware of his affection. kinda friends to lovers with eventual spice in part 3. slow burn, kinda? slapping of butts, a bit of mutual pining (reader is emotionally ... confused), mentions of eddie being treated poorly by people, mentions of eddie partaking in illegal activities, also a lot of eddie being a sweet bean. no mentions of y/n.
read part 1 here
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It was the halt of the bus that woke you up from your pre-noon nap on Eddie Munson's head.
His hand was still resting on your thigh, giving it a reassuring squeeze before he lifted his head from your shoulder and straightened himself.
The touch wasn't entirely new to you, since you had figured out this was the primary way he expressed a certain level of affection. Because he also was like this with the others of your group and you hadn't dared to read too much into it. At least until now.
"Looks like the babies already need a diaper change."
His mumbled comment on what seemed to be the first break on the road made you snort.
You loved the fact that he seemed to share your disapproval of having a rampage of middle schoolers sharing the bus with you on this trip.
Eddie turned his head to you, his deep brown doe eyes slowly wandering over your facial features while is mouth was lightly curled into a smile. Yours was slightly tilted towards him, reciprocating his gaze right before a familiar voice made both of your heads turn.
"Hey, you guys wanna head outside for a stretch?", Steve's pretty lean figure had appeared in front of your seats, he stood on one of the lower steps of the staircase leading out of the back door.
Again, Eddie turned his head to check on you. Because if you would rather stay in your seat, so would he.
You cracked a smile at Steve who was just now followed by Nancy, Robin and Dustin, all of them awaiting his exit in the aisle.
"Sounds good", you replied, while your friends hopped out of the vehicle into the warm Indiana sun which was, thankfully, still more than visible in the blue sky.
It was warmer outside than on the parking lot this morning, which made you decide leave any additional jacket or hoodie inside the bus. You weren't the type to get cold easily anyway. Following an energetically bouncing Eddie down the stairs, you both made your way over towards where Steve, Robin, Nancy and Dustin were gathered.
Not long after, you had the Byers brothers standing among you as well.
"Anyone going for a wee?", Robin asked in her blatant straight-forward no filter fashion you celebrated her for. It made you smile. "We still have six minutes and I've been holding it since we left the parking lot."
"Yeah I'll come", Nancy replied to her, before they wandered off towards the building together and left you among the group of boys who wouldn't have minded just stepping out into the bushes along the fence of the road house.
Steve was the only one who seemed to take the going outside for a stretch literal, because right now his entire figure was bent in half as he leaned forward to let his arms dangle towards the ground while he tried his best to keep his legs straight.
And Dustin's observant facial expression, which was slowly turning into a grin told you that he was desperately fighting the urge to playfully slap Steve's ass.
I mean, fair.
Eddie also had seemed to notice and it took him only a mere few seconds to decide on executing Dustin's obvious thoughts.
"Hey man, stop that!"
Steve snapped back up and let his fist hit Eddie's shoulder with a laugh.
"Just giving you what you don't seem to get anywhere else these days, big boy."
It left both Steve and Dustin speechless. Witty comebacks? Not existent in their brains.
You blurted out a laugh, since you knew that Eddie's remark was true. As one of Steve's best friends, you just knew.
The metalhead grinned widely, threw his arm around your shoulders and pulled you close enough for you to hear his low voice, while moving the both of you back towards the bus.
"Come on darling, napping always makes me hungry."
Yeah. His love language was touch.
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"Alright everyone, get back into your seats, we're leaving!"
Ms Kelley's voice echoed through the microphone she picked up from the driver's booth while standing in the very front of the bus, trying to get everyone's attention.
Unlike the middle school kids further in the front, you and Eddie had already settled back in long ago.
The vehicle started moving again.
"Is there anything besides being around children of course, that you're particularly looking forward to this week?", the metalhead asked with a genuinely curious tone.
"Oh please, there's nothing I enjoy more than having screaming kids around me, I thought you knew that about me already."
You pretended to think really hard for a few seconds and let out a chuckle, before you continued.
"No, but I get to spend time with you guys. Outside of school, outside of Hawkins. And I love lakes and being in nature. The fresh air, the cool water, I prefer that over any hotel room in any city, if I'm hone– ... Eddie, what are you d–"
While you were speaking, the boy next to you found it to be the perfect time to lean forward and try to reach for the snack bag you had carefully placed between your feet.
"Keep talking sweetheart, I'm listening." He had turned his head towards you, unable to hide another one of those big grins that you secretly adored on him. So much.
You couldn't necessarily see his movements, but you sure as hell could feel them. His right hand kept brushing and his fingers kept tapping against your jean covered calves and shins and ankles, pretending to be on the search for a certain bag, but the more time it took him to actually get it, the more it dawned on you that he was doing this very much on purpose.
What a fucking menace.
And by the way, where were his snacks?
"Eddie, just fucking grab it", you said with a laugh, letting him know you were well aware of the little game he was playing.
"Hm, it's quite nice down here to be honest. Could get used to it."
You just rolled your eyes at him with a smile, let your head hit the rest behind it and turned your head towards the window, while you felt the bag being pulled away from inbetween your feet.
In the corner of your eye you watched him peek into and rummage through it. He was sticking out his tongue, like he always did when he was trying to focus. You'd seen him do it too when he would be working on writing campaigns for Hellfire during lunch break in the cafeteria.
"Like what you see?", you asked him, without breaking contact with the headrest. You didn't dare to turn your head either.
Four hours had passed since you left the high school parking lot in Hawkins, and you don't think you ever spent that long with Eddie. Certainly not in this close proximity.
There was some form of tension building between you two. And you couldn't quite place it. He was his usual charming self, yeah sure, but there was an additional something to it.
"Yeah, I do."
If you would have turned your head, you would have noticed the fact that his eyes weren't taking in the selection of your snacks anymore.
You would have certainly placed his entire demeanor in a new context if you would have paid attention to the way the tone of his voice changed to something more soft and warm, saying those three words.
You turned your head towards him. And you were way too far down the road of overthinking for you to catch the spark in the dark brown of his eyes and the way the corner of his mouth slightly curled up.
As if he actually liked liked you.
But you still smiled back at him.
"Go ahead then pretty boy, all yours."
And maybe you also weren't referring to snacks anymore. But you didn't expect Eddie to catch that.
What you did notice though was him catching your compliments. The way heat was visibly rising to his cheeks.
Eddie Munson had never received a lot of them. Sadly so, due to the fact that he was known as the freak of the town. Being a nerd with a bunch of tattoos, always involved in some kind of trouble, hotwiring cars, dealing drugs and of course the town's favourite classic: worshipping satan. When in fact, he was just trying to be a good friend, going out of his way to make the people dearest to him feel good (and maybe not using the most legal methods ever while doing so), and just heavily enjoying things he found really cool. He was always just being himself.
You had to admit to yourself that you were more than curious to see and explore the effects of your compliments on him. Because you were sure that if you just kept dropping them, they would eventually help him feel better about himself. And you knew from conversations with your friends that he did need that. And most of all, deserved it.
Soft baby cow personality, yeah.
For more general coziness on a ten hour bus ride, you had taken off your shoes right after the first break. You slightly turned your back towards the window and pulled your legs up to let them rest on the little barrier in front of both your seats.
And just after that, you were handed the snack bag by the boy next to you.
Before you knew it, he grabbed both of your legs a little above your ankles (with his really warm hands, like, really warm hands) and pulled them over his thighs. It made your breath hitch in your throat.
Then he took back the snacks. Between his torso and your legs.
"Gotta set the table then, right?", Eddie flatly said with a smirk, while pulling out a box of crackers. It made you snort.
Why did he have to be like this? And why did you like him so much for it?
You ended up sharing half of the contents of your snack bag with Eddie. Seated like this, one of his hands fumbling in whatever plastic bag or cardboard box of snack he could find, holding them out to you when he noticed you going empty on your last grab, his other resting on one of your shins, while his thumb kept rubbing slow, small circles into the flesh through your jeans.
The warmth of his hand felt like fire.
Eventually you had to keep him from munching through the remainders too, reminding him that you still had at least half of the journey ahead of you.
He had pouted at you all cute, and you had felt your cheeks heat up at him dropping another pet name at you while protesting.
You seemed to keep pushing the right buttons for him to be all sweet with you. And yeah, of course you couldn't deny that you enjoyed his attention.
During your time munching away, you both even came to learn new things about each other.
There were conversations about your families, milestones of your lives, hopes and dreams that some you surprisingly seemed to be sharing, similarities in your outlooks on life, Eddie's slightly questionable moral compass when it came to illegal activities, and your shared love and passion for music.
Pretty much everything he told you was confirming or adding to your already existent image of him.
After a content sigh, Eddie suddenly made attempts to get up into the aisle (he was kind enough to softly place your legs on his seat first though) and reached up into the luggage compartment. He was searching for his own bag of stuff that you were surprised he hadn't forgotten on his bed in the morning.
And yes. Your eyes just had to travel over the stretch of his Hellfire shirt down over his torso, all the way to where a sliver of pale skin revealed itself to you and the light trail of dark hair disappeared into the waistband of his black jeans, which was tied to his hips with his iconic handcuff belt. And it was giving you ideas.
It was pretty much the first time you saw any other part of his skin other than his forearms, even though you'd known him for like, half a year now. There just hadn't been any moments yet where this situation could have happened.
You were so lost in thoughts about Eddie Munson's happy trail that you missed him catching you. Looking. In fact, you seemed to keep your eyes glued to his belly until his voice snapped you out of it.
The growing smirk on his face you saw next was as prominent as your awareness of your own feelings towards him. Just now in this moment you started to realise that if you kept this up, if you kept letting him in, there would probably be no escape. No escape from tripping over the edge and falling into the endless void of pining after him, probably forever.
Ever since you had first met him at one of Steve's infamous parties, it had been crystal clear to you that you were going to have a thing for him.
The way his wild mane had accentuated his beautiful face with his round dark brown eyes and the plushness of his lips in the warm light of Harrington's living room, his smell, a mix of cigarettes, bergamot, cheap cologne and something you couldn't make out but was so distinctly Eddie, the omnipresent leather jacket and Dio jeans vest, tattoos you'd spotted on his forearms, his entire rough metalhead aura that you always found to be so captivating.
"You know that as your designated seat partner, it underlies my absolute obligation to not only eat all your snacks you brought just for me of course, but in return to also make you listen to the best songs in the world.", Eddie explained to you with raised eyebrows, wide eyes and an equally wide grin after he had seated himself again and gestured for you to put your legs back on his thighs.
And who were you to say no to that?
He waved a self made mixtape under your nose. It made you chuckle.
You prided yourself on being a music nerd, so the fact that he was willing to share his music with you was definitely one of the most meaningful things he could have chosen to do with you at this point.
"Oh, how gracious of you, Munson, considering it was you who kept a seat for me", you smiled while taking out your headphones and walkman, which was so technically advanced that it had two plugs for two pairs of headphones. How convenient.
He let out a small, low chuckle while nudging your shoulder with his own.
You held out the second plug of the walkman out in his direction, and he didn't waste the opportunity to place his hand above yours which was holding out the device, to give it more support while his other hand connected the cable of his own.
And just when you were about to press play for the first song to fill your ears, Ms Kelley's microphone filtered voice filled them instead.
"We're going to have lunch break now, everyone! Please be back here in thirty minutes, yes?"
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tagged: my dear @josephfakingquinn and @ghost-proofbaby
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Finding "the meaning" to a show that could have had up to five or seven seasons but was cancelled after the second is somewhat like trying to understand a novel composed of seventy chapters by having read only twenty — there is a whole wealth of information which we do not possess that could alter our reading of any given element or of the entire thing in itself.
Still, there are always patterns that weave a story into a cohesive unit and they can help us to better grope in darkness towards comprehension. One such pattern in Warrior Nun appears to be how the consequences to mistakes, "sins" or evil deeds committed by characters manifest.
Basic storytelling usually requires characters to act on something so that complications or resolutions may arise from their choices and move the plot forwards. In Warrior Nun, many of these actions are quite tragic in nature: Suzanne's arrogance and pride lead to the death of her Mother Superion; Vincent's allegiance to the higher power he believed Adriel to be inspired him to kill Shannon; Ava's flight from the Cat's Cradle ends up damning Lilith as she is mortally wounded and taken away by a tarask... All of these events have negative outcomes and heavy repercussions on all characters directly or indirectly involved. Something changes permanently because of them, be it in the world around them or within the characters themselves.
And yet, it would seem that all of these dark deeds not only move the story forwards but might also have overall positive results. We would have had no protagonist without Ava — and she would arguably never have received the halo to begin with had she not been murdered. What's more, on a personal scale, the horrifying crime she suffers is, in the end, the very thing that allows her a second chance in life, a new life.
An act of outside evil permits Ava to grow and develop, shows her a path she would not otherwise have found. Without her own season in some sort of hell, Lilith would not have been able to advance towards other ways of being and understanding beyond her very strict limitations. Vincent and Suzanne would not have embarked on their own journeys of enlightenment without having caused the pain they are responsible for.
Beatrice might have been paying for someone else's mistakes, but she, too, is given the chance to grow into herself through it. The afflictions that torment these characters advance the overall plot, but they also advance them, as individuals, as long as they are willing to learn and keep going despite the calamities large and small that they are faced with. Beatrice keeps going after parental rejection, Mary keeps going after losing Shannon, Jillian keeps going after losing her son (in part through her own actions, adding insult to injury)... Trouble and the adaptation that follows it, if one is open enough to learn from the experience, motivates the characters, propels them forward, teaches them.
The problem of evil has occupied the minds of many a thinker throughout the ages, given how the very existence of it, evil, might call into question that of God (a good, omniscient, omnipotent one, anyway). A common way of justifying suffering (and also God), then, is by claiming, as Saint Augustine, that "God judged it better to bring good out of evil than not to permit any evil to exist".
Now, it would be rather ridiculous to say of Warrior Nun that it follows in Leibniz's footsteps, also because this philosopher, expanding on the augustinian concept, attempted to defend the goodness of a real God with his "best of all possible worlds" while all we have is... Well, whatever/whoever Reya is.
But there seems to be an inclination towards some sort of optimism as a worldview nonetheless.
Betrayals reveal truth and grant knowledge (Vincent's culminates with the coming of Adriel, which allows us to know of the threat of a "Holy War" and thus prepare for it; Kristian's gives Jillian much needed insight, William's lights up the fuse for the fight to be taken more seriously...), crimes committed willingly or not open the way for Ava (Suzanne's killing of her Mother Superion causes the loss of the halo, which is transferred to Shannon, whose death opens the gates for Ava to walk through after being herself murdered by sister Frances)... The magnitude of these positive outcomes is perhaps not "balanced" when compared to the evil that brings them about, but there is still something to take out of the catastrophe.
However tragic the tones of a given event, the show itself appears to shun the predetermination that makes tragedy as a genre; if everything is connected, here it at least appears to not necessarily drag everyone into their horrible dooms.
What's more is that this lurking "optimism" matches really well with our own protagonist's personality.
And it makes perfect sense that Ava would do the best she could with whatever she is given.
Life for her, in the conditions she experienced after the accident, would have been unbearable without some sort of positive outlook on life. However deadpan, the joking and the "obscene gestures" and whatever other forms of goofing around beside Diego are a way of turning a portion of the situation in her own favour. Proverbial eggs have, after all, already been broken right and left — might as well make an omelette of whatever remains.
Humour is just another way of looking at the bright side of something, or, at the every least, of mitigating the utter horror it might bring. If the show allows for moments of lightness, if it lets us laugh, if it takes us through a perilous voyage which still bears ripe, succulent fruit instead of the rot of pessimism and its necessary contempt for humanity, it is because Ava herself sees things in this way. It isn't gratuitous or naïve in this case, but a true survival strategy, especially as it is confronted with the morbidity of Catholicism.
Here is a religion that soothes its faithful with the promise of reward in the afterlife — how else does one charge into battle against the unknown, risking one's own death along with that of one's sisters, without the balm of believing that we shall all meet again eventually, "in this life or the next"? How else does one come to terms with the ugliness and the pain of this existence if not by looking forward to a paradise perfect enough to make all trials and tribulations here worth it?
True nihilism would have annihilated Ava. Her present perspective is what avoided the abyss.
And there is nothing Panglossian to her attitude or what the show might imply by giving us her view on things. This isn't about "the best of all possible worlds", but of making the best of whatever situation we're in, of taking what we have and doing something with it, something good, something of ourselves. It isn't God making good out of evil, but our choices.
Killing innocent people and feeling no remorse will never be the best someone can aspire to do. Sister Frances, cardinal William, Adriel all learn this the hard way.
Those who do their best find that, somehow, they can move on from whatever it was that paralysed them. Ava, most of all, knows what it is to be stuck, frozen in place; she can never be the character who refuses to grow, even through pain, lest she condemns her spirit to the same fate her body is all too familiarised with. Those around her wise enough to let themselves be touched by her, by the dynamic power she carries, walk forth with her and live.
It says very little about "God" that Warrior Nun should adopt its heroine's views and seem "optimistic" as it progresses — but it speaks volumes about the values it presents for pondering, of the inspiration its protagonists provide, and of the multiple reasons why this is a story unlike most others.
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