#i was ready to give next semester a shot but now i literally have to take even more classes | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cheesiedomino · 2 years

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Forbidden Secrets

genre: non-idol au, college au, forbidden relationship, hyunjin x fem!reader, professor!hyunjin x student!reader, pg-15

wc: 10.4k… i really didn’t plan for this to be this long but here we are i guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

tags/warnings: fluff, kissing + steamy makeout scene, mild cursing, reader is very confident in themselves (sometimes a little too overly confident), literally anything the reader manifests she gets it’s insane, some mention of alcohol usage, some suggestive moments but nothing that detailed, “taboo/unacceptable” practices (teachers falling in love with their student lol)

synopsis: from the moment you laid your eyes on him you knew you had to have him. you’ll go as far as to do anything for him, knowing full well he is your college professor.

{a/n: heyy y’all, i know what you’re thinking. i’ve been gone for a while but yess i am finally back and ready to give you all the content i’ve been wanting to put out. YES i made a teacher x student fic and what about it ?? i know it can be overdone a lot but i’m a sucker for this trope so i don’t care ! anywhoo, i hope you all enjoy this long one and as always feedback and your opinions are much appreciated, thank you ♡︎}

Hangovers were the absolute worst. You loathed the sound of your alarm, which sounded extra loud this morning for some reason. Without even opening both of your eyes you try to find your phone to shut it off on the nightstand next to you, dropping your phone in the process. You groan as you now had to fully wake up to retrieve your phone from the floor, finally able to turn off the annoying sound. You sighed as you threw your phone onto the bed, not even bothering to make your own bed as you were exhausted. You spent the whole night yesterday drinking and playing Uno with your friends at one of their dorms but the instant regret you felt from taking too many shots finally sunk in. You often go a little too hard sometimes and your head was feeling fifty pounds heavier this morning.

It was the first day back at uni for your second semester and you were more than thrilled to start school again. You missed seeing all of your close friends and since you went to a university out of state you could only see them during school. You made a lot of new friends and created so many beautiful memories with them, you were a social butterfly and you thrived the most when you were around others. Your friends and your happiness were the most important things in life to you at this moment, and doing well in school was too. Getting good grades while also having a hefty social life was something you aspired to master, you truly had it all, the friends, the looks, the grades, nothing was impossible for you.

It was 8:45 am and your first class began at 9:30, you knew you had to rush to get ready so you didn’t even bother putting on makeup or fancy clothes. It may be the first day back at school but you didn’t care so much about your looks right now, you were hungover, exhausted, and just ready to get the day over with. You were pretty enough that you didn’t even need all the extra stuff anyways. Your confidence was all you needed to wear. After washing up and skimming through your closet, you find a simple outfit to wear and put your sneakers on. You grab your bag and your phone to finally head out to the shuttle bus that dropped you off at uni. You check your messages and you see you had over 200 unread messages. Your eyes grew wide at the overwhelming amount of texts you were receiving only to come to realize that it was all from the same group chat you were in, this group chat consisted of Felix, Seungmin, Haechan, Chaeyoung, Sumin, and Jennie; all of your best friends. Scrolling through the myriad of texts from the chat you couldn’t help but laugh quietly to yourself while on the bus, Jennie was describing how she nearly dropped her toothbrush in the toilet while Seungmin and Haechan were teasing Felix for how bad he was at Uno. It was a chaotic but entertaining moment for you to witness. You sent a few texts during the ride but as you got close to your stop you grabbed your things to stand up, you hated the first day of school because classes were so boring. The introductory stuff was always a snooze for you and the fact you felt like a zombie on the inside wasn’t making your situation any better. Nevertheless, you know you have no choice but to push through so you get off the bus and head to the building where your first class was being held in.

You majored in media arts production which was something you’ve always been passionate about, your dreams of becoming a movie script writer or even a director one day was evident ever since you were little. You starred in many plays in high school and participated in theatre even outside of school activities. Your bubbly personality and confidence got you to where you are now and the university you attend is one of the best to go to for your major. The class you had this morning was Intro To Cinematography 101, the classroom was ginormous and had over 400 seats which most, if not all, besides a few random ones were filled. It was exactly 9:30 at this point and the fact you scrambled to make it just in time was a miracle for you. You found the nearest seat that wasn’t taken and you plopped down ready to go back to your dorm and fall asleep. But unfortunately, you couldn’t do that, you cared about your academics way too much. You had 4 more classes to endure today so it was only a matter of time before you’d have to force yourself to wake up and get out of slump mode.

It’s now 3:30 pm, the afternoon came by quickly and it was your last class of the day. You walk through the door only to be invited by a completely empty room. You were highly confused. You knew this was the exact building and room number that the class was being held in and you couldn’t fathom what was going on right now. You quickly took out your phone to check your emails and there was a recent one at 2:45 pm that you hadn’t read, it was from your professor:

‘Hello, class/students! I hope this email finds you well, unfortunately, room 202 will NOT be our classroom anymore for Intro to Fine Arts & Design as there were some technical issues with the projector. We will continue our class for the remainder of the year in room 318 in the building next to the main auditorium. I apologize for this inconvenience and hope to see you all still come on time.

Thank you, Mr.Hwang’

You let out a long sigh as you realize you should’ve checked your emails sooner, you didn’t even think of a possibility that this could’ve happened. The auditorium wasn’t even remotely close to the building you were in now and you had to book it to class or else you’ll leave a bad impression. Timing was something you always made sure to manage and this was not a good look for you at all. You quickly ran to the nearest elevator you could find and did your best to try and make it to the new classroom. You didn’t care that people were looking at you as if you were some maniac, all you needed to do at this moment was get to class. After finally getting to the auditorium you see a door with a large paper sign with bold lettering, ‘Intro to Fine Arts & Design class here’ that must be it. You open the door and scan the room to see a full class and you hear the professor talking. You felt so embarrassed at this moment and it didn’t make you feel any better with all the eyes on you, you usually love all the attention on you but now it just felt grueling. Keeping your head down the entire time, you make your way to the only seat that wasn’t occupied. The professor was babbling on about something but you didn’t even look up nor pay attention to what he had to say, that was until he said your name.

“Y/n? Y/n?” The professor was clearly trying to get you to acknowledge something. You shot your shot head up instantly to start profusely apologizing but that came to a halt once you made eye contact with the male. You thought you were dreaming, the person in front of you was the most gorgeous person you’ve ever seen in your entire life. His eyes were staring deep into your soul and it almost gave you a mini heart attack.

“H-hi sorry, yes?” you trip over your words a bit which is something you never do, you always spoke clearly and confidently.

“You came in pretty late, is there a reason why this occurred?” He asked you in a sharp tone, you weren’t expecting to get grilled by your own professor on the first day, let alone a guy you think is really attractive. You shouldn’t even be having these thoughts so you try your best to push them away.

“I didn’t read the email you sent until I got to the wrong classroom, I apologize for my tardiness.” You were actually sincere with your apology, if only you knew to check your email this would've never happened to begin with, you only had yourself to blame. The professor just nods and accepts your answer, “Okay, very well then we will continue everyone!”

You couldn’t help but sigh as you just got outed in front of the whole class but you quickly got over it and began taking your notebook out of your bag. You wanted to go on as if nothing happened and it was working up until he made a reference mid-class about how he doesn’t tolerate tardiness and how it’s important to check everything, especially your emails. You weren’t sure if he was just trying to single you out but when he said that he looked over at you. You wanted to hide and never come back to class again, but that wasn’t an option since you needed to take this course for your semester. All you could think right now was that this class was going to give you hell.

“Alright everyone, I know it’s only the first day but I have an assignment for you all to complete within the next few days” the professor announced, you could hear low murmurs around the room which made you hide your mouth from giggling.

“I know, I know you’re all thinking “this guy is absolutely nuts for making us do homework on the first day” but you are all college students now so this should be expected!”

You wanted to roll your eyes at his little speech but you refrain from doing it, “It’s a simple assignment that will boost your grades immediately, here are three works of art that I would like you to choose from to dissect the meanings of, the minimum is 5-6 paragraphs and I’d like you all to really delve in with these and you can even come up with your own theories. This will be a weekly assignment where you keep everything in a journal, this will be called your creative journal. You can also choose to write about a work of art that you like!”

‘Simple?’ you thought to yourself, there is no way you can come up with a minimum of 5-6 paragraphs on those boring works of art he picked. The choices were terrible and you knew you weren’t going with whatever he chose. You can also tell that he is very passionate about what he does but he talks way too much for your liking. He went on to continue, “If you just do the work you’ll get an easy A within the class, the course grade structure consists of 3 main things: participation, your creative journals, and there will be 2 main projects that will be towards the end of the year, I value quality over quantity so I like this structure the most. I want everyone one of you to do well in this class, I won’t leave anyone behind and I believe in all of you.”

You wanted to scoff at his “inspirational” speech that he has going on right now and it sounds like something out of a drama. ‘He is one dramatic teacher’ you thought to yourself.

Once class was finally over and he dismissed everyone you got up to leave but you heard him call after you, you definitely knew this was going to be about what happened earlier. You turn around to face the gorgeous man, now up close and personal. You don’t know why but you were nervous out of your mind.

“Hey Y/n, I noticed you were talking the least in the class. Is my material not engaging enough for you?” He asked in a serious tone. You really couldn’t believe he was even asking you this, why did it matter how you acted on the first day of class?

“Um, I don’t know what you mean. Sorry if I wasn’t participating” You instantly regretted saying that, you now look even worse of a student than what you already did.

“I just want to make sure all of my students grasp the material correctly, if you’d like me to change something in my teaching style please let me know, I’m always looking for ways to improve,” He tells you, he takes this seriously.

“N-no, you teach fine! I will make sure to come to class on time and participate more from now on I’m sorry for the trouble Mr. Hwang” you said, feeling actual remorse. First impressions were everything to you and this was not the impression you wanted to give to your professor, let alone him of all people.

“There is no trouble, you are still learning and growing. I hope to see you thrive in this class Y/n, have a good day” he says while never breaking eye contact with you. His gaze and perfect facial structure made you feel dizzy on the inside, you wanted to do any and everything to impress this man.

“You too..” was all you were able to muster, you quickly grabbed your things and left feeling like you were just hit by a semi-truck. It should be illegal for someone to be that good looking, you couldn’t stop thinking about how beautiful he was. This was going to be a hard semester for you.

“Oh come on Seungmin let me just have some!” Chaeyoung pouted as she was practically begging Seugmin to share some of his pasta with her.

“You could’ve had your own if you weren’t so lazy to get up, you know the lines for the pasta are long!” He exclaimed. There was a pasta restaurant at uni that was very popular, it was one of the most delicious spots to get food from and everything is made from scratch and takes time to make. You only go there if you have time but the lines can get pretty packed so you often pick another alternative to go to.

“You’re the greediest person on earth you know that?” Chaeyoung retorted as she dips her fork in Seungmin’s pasta without him giving permission, he instantly gives her a death glare, just looking at her as she takes a bite of the delicious pasta.

“Oh my god, it’s so fucking good!” she says with her mouth still full, everyone else at the table is just laughing at the banter going on between them. They have the most brother and sister-like relationship it’s endearing to you.

“How’d everyone’s first day of classes go?” Felix lights up trying to change the subject.

“Fine, I guess,” Jennie says while looking at something on her phone.

“Good!” Haechan exclaimed.

“I almost tripped over my own shoelace in front of everyone,” Sumin said.

“That would’ve been hilarious if you did,” Seungmin said as he began laughing,

Sumin frowned telling him fuck off which made you laugh even harder.

“My day was… interesting,” you told your friends.

“Interesting in what way?” Chaeyoung asked.

“Well, I wouldn’t say interesting but it was definitely a roller coaster. My professor gave me hell for not coming to class on time and singled me out in front of everyone over it, I never feel embarrassment but this was definitely one of those moments” you couldn’t help but spill what happened and finally being able to speak about the situation gave you more clarity.

“What the fuck? It’s only the first day, that professor needs to give people a break” Haechan says to you.

“Yeah that’s really weird of them, what class was it?” Chaeyoung asks.

“My fine arts & design class, he seems like a nice guy though and I’m sure he meant to harm by it” you tried defending his actions but saying it out loud just made it sound even worse. You don’t even know why you’re defending him to begin with since he was the one that chose to do that and he could’ve kept it to himself.

“Well the way you described it sounds like he’s a real dickhead” Haechan told you.

“No, it’s not like that! He was just making sure it didn’t happen again is all” you were not helping your case with what you just said.

“Why are you defending him y/n? He’s a piece of shit for doing that, I’d change professors if I were you since he’s already trying to start problems with you” everyone nodded in agreement with what Haechan said.

“Guys it’s fine! I’m sure he didn’t mean it and you know there’s nothing I can’t handle, he seems like he has good intentions” you knew you couldn’t tell them the full truth about why you still wanted to stick with that class.

“If you say so, who’s the professor anyway?” Seugnmin asks, he’s the smartest amongst all of you and has lots of connections with different people, he pretty much knows every person that works here.

“Mr. Hwang”

“Oh my god, him?!” Jennie immediately took her eyes off her phone screen, “I know so much dirt about him I’m surprised he even got hired to work here again”

You were so confused, you have no idea what Jennie is talking about but you know she knows all the gossip around this school and you couldn’t help but be curious.

“Oh yeah, like what?” you weren’t sure if you really wanted to know but it didn’t hurt to hear it, they were just rumors after all.

“I heard that he got a divorce last year and it wasn’t even finalized yet but he hooked up with one of his students,” Jennie said getting closer to everyone to make sure no one else heard what she had to say, “I also heard that he smokes cigarettes around campus when he’s not supposed to and he had DUI”

Well, that definitely wasn’t something you were expecting to hear, he didn’t really seem like the type to do any of that.

“None of that is probably true,” you say to Jennie, “I don’t think the board would ever agree to rehire someone with a reputation like that”

“How do you know that? You don’t even know the guy, plus he’s a prick so why would you not believe it?” Seungmin said.

“I like to give people a fair chance, you shouldn’t judge others on what you heard about them”

“It’s because he’s smoking hot,” Jennie says, “Y/n probably has a crush on him!”

You blushed at Jennie’s statement, there you go again with acting vulnerable, you don’t know why this is happening to you.

“That’s not the reason!” you wanted nothing but to have this conversation end already, you should’ve never brought it up.

Your friends kept teasing you over it for a few minutes and it made you want to get up and leave.

“She’ll probably have a wet dream about him tonight, y/n will be thinking of Mr. Hwang all night” Jennie teased, she was the main one milking this whole situation.

“I would do the same honestly, he’s the most attractive guy I’ve ever seen at this entire school” Chaeyoung shrugged at her confession.

“Okay, guys can we stop talking about my professor now? I do not want anything romantically with him” you deflect as much as you can.

“Who said anything about romance?” Felix says, making the entire table laugh.

He was right but you also don’t want to talk about making moves on your professor that you barely even know. The conversation finally diverted to something else and once it was time to go back to your dorm you waved everyone goodbye and made your way back. You couldn’t stop thinking about the rumors Jennie told you, did he really hook up with one of his students? You’ll never know and that’s what frightened you, you have no clue who he really is. You try to remind yourself that at the end of the day it’s all just rumors and most of the time people make them up to tear others down. You once had an awful rumor about you in high school and it almost ruined your life until you turned it around. You know how it feels to have people spread false things about you and it hurts, you couldn’t help but empathize with him. You wanted to prove yourself to him that you were a good student and if that’s all you need to catch his attention then so be it.

The week went by pretty quickly, your classes were going well and everything seemed to be off to a better start for you. Friday was here and that meant you were going out with your friends later, that was all the motivation you needed to get through the day. As you got ready for class, you wanted to wear something to spice up your style, something that would grab Mr. Hwang’s attention. You know you shouldn’t be dressing up for your professor but you wanted to try it out and see if he’d notice anything. If what Jennie said was true he’d probably gawk over you the moment he sees you. You feel slightly childish for doing something like this but you’re young and dumb so why not?

You were wearing a short skirt and crop top that showed just a teensy amount of cleavage, it was scandalous yet made you feel excited. You were dressed like you were going to a party but the outfit gave you a rush of confidence that you already felt within yourself. You couldn’t stop looking at how good you looked in the mirror and snapped a few quick pics to post on your private story. A few of your friends slid up to question your intentions with your outfit and Jennie was one of them.

‘We’re not going to the bar until later, why you dressed already?’ Jennie sent with a laughing emoji.

‘I just wanted to look good today!’

‘For Mr. Hwang? ;)’

You rolled your eyes at that message.

‘Shut up!’

‘Oh you didn’t deny it, I know I’m always right!’

You left her on seen since you didn’t want to keep talking about it but it’s crazy because she’s totally right. You weren’t going to give her that satisfaction though. All that was on your mind at this moment was to show up to class feeling like a million bucks and you definitely looked the part! You made your way to the bus and sat down to check your emails to make sure you missed nothing, Mr. Hwang would often send emails about certain tweaks he made with assignments or updates on grading. Today was the day you’d be getting your first grades back on the creative journal assignment, you worked really hard on it and you knew he would definitely give you an A for it. This would seal the deal for you and the mix of how good you looked would just set everything off. To say you were thrilled for class was an understatement.

Once you made it to the classroom you saw everyone else take their seats but Mr. Hwang was nowhere to be seen. It was 3:30 sharp and he wasn’t even on time for his own class, talk about not practicing what you preach. It was 3:34 and he finally arrived, he came rushing in and apologized over and over for his inability to be on time.

“Hello everyone, I am so so sorry for being late today and I would like you all to forgive me for not keeping my own word about showing up to class on time,” he says, he’s very serious about it and you can tell he was genuinely sorry. You couldn’t stop looking at him though, the outfit he wore today was absolutely exquisite. He wore the tightest black pants that accentuated his body nicely, especially his behind. You never took a liking to looking at men’s asses but he had a nice one for sure. The way the cuffs of his short-sleeve dress shirt clung to his biceps made you melt from the inside. You could see a small bead of sweat peaking down on the side of his face from trying to get here as quick as possible, you noticed how his breathing was irregular and he was still trying to catch some air. Everything about him was pure perfection. He made you feel so many things just from his presence alone. You quickly snapped out of your daydream once he brought up the homework results.

“Alright let’s get to the real discussion, shall we? I have your creative journals graded and ready to be handed back to all of you. I would just like to say that I’m so proud of you all and you truly showed great effort in these journals, I loved all of the theories you guys had and it was so much fun to read them all!” His smile was so contagious, when he smiled you wanted to do the same.

“I will say everyone's last name from Alphabetical order and I will hand you your journals back, please come up once you hear your name,” He began to go down the list of names until you heard yours. You got up from your seat and walked up to him confidently, you were curious what he’d say to you since you worked on that assignment for a while and you were proud of your work. You come to his desk and he hands back your journal to you barely even looking at you.

“Please see me after class if you need to Y/n, I’m not sure if you really understood the assignment,” Mr. Hwang says to you. You were more than shocked to see on the paper a big fat ‘F’ was written. You were appalled. You wanted to drop to your knees and start crying right then and there. Never in your life have you ever received such a grade and the sight of it felt like a bullet through your heart. You were stunned and didn’t even know what to say. He was looking everywhere but at you and this only made your confidence dwindle even more.

“How could this have happened?” you asked him with a dumbfounded look on your face.

“Like I said Y/n, please talk to me after class you’re disrupting the process right now,” He says dismissing your feelings. You wanted to curse him out so badly, you were livid. You spent so much time and effort on your assignment and you couldn’t believe he gave you this kind of grade, it was unacceptable for you. You could only turn back and sit down, there was no use to argue and make a fool out of yourself in front of the whole class. You were debating on actually taking up his offer by staying after class and talking about it but you were so frustrated at this point you wanted to go home. None of this went according to plan and you weren’t sure if it was because of you or him.

Once class was over and everyone got up to leave, you noticed a few girls stayed and tried talking to Mr. Hwang. They weren’t even talking about class-related material, they were all just there to try and have a conversation with him. You sighed because now you had to wait since you actually had to speak to him about something important, which was your grade. After waiting for what seemed like forever and the girls finally left you were now able to speak with the professor one on one. He looked up at you for the first time today and his whole demeanor changed once he saw you. He didn’t have that welcoming smile that he once had with the other girls and it made you feel some type of way. Why the sudden change in tone?

“Hello Y/n, it’s nice to see you,” he says with an odd smirk on his face, “what can I do for you?”

“I’d like to talk about my grade, why did I receive an F? I worked really hard on that assignment and I’d like you to regrade it,” you didn’t mean for your response to sound so demanding but you were freaking out at this point because you’ve never failed at anything before.

“May I remind you that my assignments have instructions? If one does not read them they will not do well in this class,” he retorts.

“What do you mean by that? I clearly read the instructions and I followed them to a T, this is unfair” you couldn’t believe he was questioning your ability right now.

“I don’t think you did Y/n, because if you did you would’ve noticed that I said you had to pick from one of the three works I chose for you to analyze”

“But didn’t you say that we could choose our own too?!” to say you were puzzled was an understatement.

“Yes, but you needed special permission from me to do that, which you never did”

That’s when everything clicked for you. You couldn't believe you missed that crucial part. You’ve never been so careless before.

“Oh... I totally forgot about that,” you said looking at the ground, now realizing you came on too strongly about your own mistake.

“Look Y/n, I’m sorry but I had to do this, although your assignment was very well written I just couldn’t accept it, it wouldn’t be morally right to do” He explained.

You nod your head as you sigh in defeat, were you really going to let this happen? You couldn’t, you’ve always found a way to turn any situation around and this was no different. You had to do something to help yourself, the only thing you know that will, that being your charisma.

“Listen, Mr. Hwang, I know I may have messed up with not asking for your permission but I would like to ask just this one time for a second try, please, I know I can do better trust me” you gave him a pleading look that you only give when you’re in dire need. You don’t know if it’s going to work but you’re giving the performance of a lifetime right now, all those years of theatre are definitely paying off. “Please, just one more shot is all I need to prove myself”

There was a moment of silence for a bit, he was definitely putting a lot of thought into his response and it pained you to be here with him in this very moment, you wanted nothing but to impress him. You came closer to his desk and rested your arm on it, making the space between the both of you even more nonexistent. You wanted to make him feel something, you weren’t sure what but you needed to change his mind fast. If there was some sort of magical spell that you could cast upon him right now you’d do it in a heartbeat.

“Alright, I’ll give you one more shot at it” he finally gives you an answer. This was exactly what you wanted to hear. “Under one condition” he follows with his statement.

“What is it?” You asked.

“Please join my art and literary club,” he says, “we meet every Wednesday at 7 pm and I think your writing is amazing, you’d be an excellent addition to our team”

You were definitely not expecting him to say that, you were now even more confused than you already were. How could he have given you an F on your first ever assignment while in the same breath praise you and ask you to join his club? It made absolutely no sense. However, if this was the ultimatum he was going to give you in order for a second chance you had to take it. You were willing to do anything for him.

“O-okay, sure,” you said, there you go again with stumbling over your words, this man made you feel like you were on fire.

“Great! thank you so much for doing this, I appreciate it a lot and I’m so excited to see you on Wednesday” He shot you a bold smile, showing his tiny dimple on the side of his face. He was breathtaking, you could get up on the desk and kiss him right now. What are you thinking? He’s your damn professor, get a grip.

“Me too… I guess I’ll see you around,” you say coming to your senses as you pick up your things to go.

“I hope I don’t scare you Y/n, you can always come to me even if it isn’t about the class you can talk to me about anything, I really care about all my students,” He says.

“Thanks. Have a good rest of your day Mr. Hwang”

“Please, you can call me Hyunjin if you’d like!”

“Okay.” You head out the door and couldn’t believe the long conversation you just had with him. ‘He wants me to call him Hyunjin? Isn’t that a bit too informal?’ you thought to yourself, it could be because you’re now joining his club but it just didn’t make sense that he’d want you to be so informal with him since he doesn’t act that way during class. You shrug it off as him just being polite and go on about your day, however, you still couldn’t stop thinking about how good his butt looked in those tight pants.

It’s Wednesday. The days keep rolling by quicker than ever and you were thrilled to be seeing Mr. Hwang, well, Hyunjin outside of class. It may still be school related but just another chance to be around him was all you needed. Ever since you accepted his offer he’s been much nicer to you in class, he often smiles at you when he shares glances with you and it makes you feel all fuzzy inside. He’s a very cut-and-dry kind of professor and does everything strictly by the book, he’s very stern and that’s what attracts you the most about him. He’s very mysterious too and doesn’t talk about his private life much which makes you wonder about his life story. He’s definitely not the kind of guy to tell any and everyone about personal stories of his and you want nothing more than to be let into his world. Your interest in him has only grown stronger and joining this club will only help you in succeeding with your plan. Today you wore a dress that accented your body very well, it was a cute dress that Chaeyoung had bought for you while she was on a trip to Paris. It made you feel beautiful inside and out and you couldn’t be more thankful for the gift she gave you. You were more than sure that this would get Hyunjin’s attention. As you were finished with your classes for the day you went to the main cafeteria to meet up with your friends to eat. The club didn’t start until 7 so you had about 2 and a half hours to kill. You got some chicken stir fry and diet coke and sat with your friends at the booth you always sit at. They were all heavily engrossed in each other's phones and it was fun to look at all of their reactions to whatever was on their screens. You plopped down in the seat and began eating your food, that’s when Sumin decided to finally break the ice and say something.

“So guys are we still on for tonight?” She asks. You have no idea what she’s talking about, furthermore, what does she mean by tonight? You were booked and busy with Hyunjin later so if there was something going on later you would definitely not be able to make it.

“Yeah of course!” Seungmin said.

“You know I’m always down,” Felix said, everyone else just nodded in agreement besides you, you really had no clue what was going on.

“Y/n, you coming?” Sumin asked you. You couldn’t even give a yes or no answer because you don’t even know what plans they made.

“I’m not sure what you mean. Did we make plans today?” you were so lost right now.

“Um… yeah where have you been?” Seungmin said with a confused look on his face.

“Maybe if you read the group chat you’d know,” Jennie said while crossing her arms.

That’s when it dawned on you that you haven’t read the group chat since yesterday morning, you had put it on mute for a bit to stop distracting you from your homework that you forgot to unmute the conversation. You felt so guilty right now.

“Oh guys I’m so sorry, but I won’t be able to make it I have something else to do later,” You tell everyone, you felt bad letting your friends down but you wouldn’t have made it anyway since you already established joining this club last week.

“What’re you doing?!” Chaeyoung asked, you only hang out with them, or even if it’s other friends you’d let them know ahead of time. You never told any of them that you joined this club and you’re now regretting this choice.

“I’m going to a club– I mean I joined a club and it starts at 7,” you tell them giving as little information as possible.

“What? You never told us about you joining a club,” Haechan said surprised by this newfound information.

“Yeah, it kind of was a spur of the moment thing but yeah, I’m part of a club now,”

“Which club is it?” Seungmin asks. You were now backed into another corner.

“The art club!” you know they’re not going to take this for an answer, there were a billion different kinds of art clubs and that wasn’t going to get you out the clear.

“Uh… do you know how many damn art clubs there are here Y/n? I’m gonna need you to be specific,” you could tell Seungmin was growing impatient with your lack of responsiveness.

That’s when you just went out and said it, there’s no use in keeping it from them anymore.

“The art and literary club,” You tell them.

Seungmin raised his eyebrow, “Isn’t that the club Mr. Hwang is the founder of?”

“Yeah” was all you said in return.

“You just can’t get enough of him can you?” Chaeyoung says with a cringey wink.

“It’s not even like that guys! He asked me to join since he really liked my writing and he even lets me call him by his first name,”

“Well, he seems to be really comfortable with you,” Felix says in a joking manner.

“He probably asked you to join just so he can see you more often,” Jennie says giggling.

“Guys, I’m telling you it’s not like that at all. Plus, I don’t think he’d jeopardize his career just to do something so foolish,” you couldn’t stop deflecting, you wanted to believe he has good intentions behind all of this but in the back of your mind you want this to happen, you want to get closer to Hyunjin.

“Whatever you say Y/n, but you can’t deny that you’re gorgeous and he probably wants you to join his club but also be around you simultaneously, it’s a brilliant plan from his perspective” Seungmin explains.

You know he’s probably right and that thought terrifies you. What will happen when you see Hyunjin later? Your excitement continues to build up as you think about it more. You want to keep a lasting impression on him and this was the perfect opportunity for you.

After chatting it up with your friends you finally made your way over to the building the club was being held at. You got to the room and walked in to see only a few people there. You don’t know how many people you expected to be here but you definitely thought there’d be way more. Hyunjin was seated in one of the chairs talking to one of his students but once he saw you walk in he looked straight up at you, causing you to both make sudden eye contact. He was the first to instantly look away and it made you feel even more confident. You took a seat in the front row near him, you were excited to see what this club entailed.

“Hey everyone! Welcome to our second day of the art and literary club, before we begin I'd like to go ahead and introduce everyone to our newest member of the team, Y/n!” He introduced you to the class and everyone smiled giving you their welcomes and nice to meet you’s. Everyone seemed nice and it made you feel even more comfortable while being here. You know you were only here for the sake of Hyunjin but if you were able to make new friends from this club that would be a major plus too.

“It’s nice to meet everyone, I’m glad to be here,” You tell everyone while also giving a cute smile to Hyunjin.

“Okay so I have a lot prepared for us today, I wanna start today’s session by doing a 5-minute sketch, it can be of anything, and just draw it for 5 minutes. It really gets your mind working and it’s a great exercise to begin with!” Hyunjin announced, he’s always so enthusiastic about his work. You do as you’re told and grab your sketchbook that you picked up from the campus store a few days ago and begin thinking about what you wanted to sketch. You decided on an ice cream cone and you wanted to add as much detail as possible. Your artwork wasn’t on Michaelangelo level but your skills weren’t pretty bad either. You began sketching the shape of the cone and how you wanted the rest of it to look, you had only 3 minutes left at this point so you had to hurry up. Once the 5 minutes were over you put your pencil down and waited for Hyunjin to say something.

“Alright, times up guys! I wanna see all of your drawings, I can’t wait to see what you all came up with,” he says in a cheerful tone.

“Is that a T-rex?” He asked the person next to you, the person nodded and he commented on the realism of the art style. He looked at some more sketches and shared his thoughts and once he reached yours he picked up your book to analyze the sketch you made. He looked at it for a while and finally gave his opinion on it, “Nicely done Y/n, is ice cream your favorite dessert?” He asks.

“Yeah, one of them!”

“Hmm... I see, and you’re also a fan of sprinkles I see,” He says commenting on the excessive amount of sprinkles you drew on.

“Yeah, that too,” you say chuckling while looking up at him. You licked your lips while he was still looking at you and you can tell that just sparked something in him as he quickly put the sketchbook down and went on to continue as if nothing ever happened.

The rest of the day went on and you were enjoying every minute of being here. You were practicing with watercolor and it was something you haven’t done since middle school. You wanted to make an ocean painting but the shades of blues you wanted just weren’t turning out the way you wanted them. You grew frustrated with the outcome of everything and you sighed as you went to go grab a new palette to try again.

“What’s the matter Y/n? Why aren’t you using the palette you already have?” Hyunjin asked walking towards you.

“I don’t like how the colors turned out, I wanted something else,” You told him.

“Why didn’t you just ask me? Come here let me help you out,” He brings you back on over to your seat with the empty canvas and palette full of blue paints.

“If you wanted a darker or lighter contrast it’s an easy fix, all you have to do is add the right amount of black or white, make sure you don’t overdo it though” He explains more about how to mix the colors properly but all you could look at right now were how beautiful his thighs looked. He was wearing a different pair of tight pants today, they were plaid and you loved the way they clung to his body. He could wear anything and it would look good on him honestly. You were barely paying attention to what he was saying and it became evident once he asked you a question.

“I’m sorry what did you say again?” You said, lost in your train of thought. Hyunjin’s thighs are going to be the death of you.

“I said how about you try the painting now since the colors are mixed properly,”

“Oh yeah, sure!” you sit back down and as Hyunjin walks past you a whiff of his scent struck you like lightning. He smelled like expensive cologne, he probably has very specific and tasteful choices for the type of cologne he wears. You want to know any and everything about him. As time passes by it was dwindling down towards the end and you can see everyone beginning to pack up. You stop what you’re doing and look at all the progress you made. The painting came out 100 times better than you envisioned it would be and it was all thanks to Hyunjin for saving your terrible attempt at mixing colors. He made sure to check in with you every so often and at one point he put his hand on your shoulder to express how good of a job you were doing so far. It sent tingles down your spine and you don’t even know how you survived that. He made you feel so many things just from a simple touch and that’s why you needed to have him. You know it’s wrong of you to think your professor is hot and you know it’s not okay to have a crush on him yet you don’t care. You are being selfish right now and if flirting with your professor a little bit can satisfy your craving then that’s all you need. You watched as everyone was heading out to leave while a couple of others stuck around to have a chat with Mr. Hwang. He always spoke very well-mannered and never used slang around any of his students, he spoke professionally and had a dry sense of humor most of the time. ‘There’s no way this could be the same guy that has all these rumors about him floating around’ you think to yourself. You decide to leave while other people were still talking with him when all of a sudden you heard your name being called.

“Y/n, do you mind just staying here for a bit? I want to have a word with you,” Hyunjin says, accidentally interrupting the students that were talking to him. You were a little surprised he said this but not that much since he’s already done this before. You wondered what it could be this time though.

“Yeah sure, no problem” you answer.

As everyone begins leaving you are now left alone with Hyunjin yet again. He’s standing in front of the whiteboard and you walk up towards him.

“So… what is it you wanted to talk to me about?” You ask. Hopefully, it won’t be about your second attempt at the assignment, you’ve been dreading receiving your new grade and if it’s not what you were achieving for you you don’t want to hear it.

“Ah yes, I wanted to ask if you’ve ever painted before? Your attention to detail is phenomenal and I’m already captivated by your work,” he says. You smiled instantly at his praise, there’s just something about it that gets you going.

“Thank you so much, Mr. Hwang, quite frankly I haven’t done watercolor painting since middle school, but it was so fun to try this again!” you tell him.

“Wow really? You could’ve fooled me, you’re probably one of the best ones in the bunch already, I’m serious Y/n, you are talented”

You were over the moon right now. It felt so good at this moment and nothing could stop you from feeling on top of the world. You wanted Hyunjin’s approval and you finally got it.

“Also please Y/n, stop with all the formality you can call me Hyunjin!”

You realized you accidentally called him Mr. Hwang again and it made your cheeks turn red.

“Sorry about that,” you said.

“It's alright, just don’t let it happen again okay?” he says, you don’t understand how anything he says just sounds extremely hot. You want nothing more than to have him let you in.

“Well, I should get going,” you say, “I have so much to do”

“Oh like what?” Hyunjin asks out of curiosity, you’ve never had him ask a question about your personal life.

“I just have some homework to do, my friends made plans to do something today but I told them I had other obligations instead,”

“Oh wow, you sacrificed a night with your friends to come join my club? I feel highly honored,” he says putting a hand over his heart.

“No, it’s just I committed to doing this way before they even created those plans so it was only right of me to choose coming here,”

“I like that about you Y/n, you stick to what you believe in and what you feel is right, you have a golden personality,” Hyunjin says, “you carry yourself very well.”

“And so do you,” You tell him. You could feel yourself become even more timid now, no one could ever make you feel so small yet high and mighty at the same time. You lived for Hyunjin’s compliments and you craved for more of them.

“Y/n be honest, have you heard anything about me?” He asks out of the blue. You don’t know why he brought this up or how he’d even know you knew anything of him to begin with.

“I’m not sure what you mean?” You tilt your head in confusion, not sure where he’s trying to get at with that question.

“Don’t be silly Y/n, I know that word gets around here a lot and I just want to know if you feel some strange way about me,” He looks at you with those endearing eyes, and you couldn’t help but fold at his demeanor.

“I haven’t heard much but they are just rumors, right? Why believe them?” You didn’t believe them, you knew he wasn’t the type of person to do any of those things and if he did any of them it was probably exaggerated for shock value.

“I want you to know that anything you hear about me is false. I’ve never told anyone this but I had a bizarre student that grew obsessed with me, they’d stalk me around campus and even got my phone number, they’d send me inappropriate photos, and found my home address. It got so bad to the point where they said if I don’t sleep with them they’d try and blackmail me to ruin my career forever.”

You couldn’t believe what he just told you. It sounded like something out of a Lifetime movie, you were disgusted by whoever did that to him.

“I’m so sorry about what happened to you, people like that are the reason what’s wrong with this world,” you said to him. You felt genuine remorse for him and you didn’t even do anything, you didn’t realize how bad things could’ve turned out for him.

“The person spread malicious rumors about me after I reported them to the board, they told so many people that I was divorced, I’m an alcoholic, how I even hooked up with some of my students. None of it is true Y/n, I hope whatever you heard doesn’t taint your image of me,” you can tell he’s speaking from the bottom of his heart, you know he’s being truthful.

“I promise you I don’t believe any of it Hyunjin, I trust you,” you say, reinforcing the deep eye contact you’re sharing with him right now. The conversation became even deeper and you weren’t expecting Hyunjin to open up with you like this so suddenly. Everything is going in motion for you and you don’t know if you’re dreaming or if this was actually real life.

“Sorry I just dumped all of that onto you, I just wanted to make sure the air was clear between the both of us, I know we may have gone off on a rough start but I really like you Y/n,” Hyunjin comes a bit closer to you now, “I hope I didn’t scare you off with what I just said”

You don’t know how to feel, your crazy hot professor that you’ve been fantasizing about since school began is now telling you that he likes you. Is this some kind of sick joke? No way this could be, you have to take this as your chance to get what you truly wanted.

You got even closer to him, the distance between you so close that the smell of his cologne was becoming intoxicating. You knew you had to do something right now or else the tension will just rise even further.

“You will never scare me off and you can always come to me if you ever need anything,” using the same line that Hyunjin used on you made you feel even more in control of the situation. You knew there was no turning back once you said those words, and you were right.

“I know I shouldn’t be asking this but can I kiss you Y/n?” Hyunjin asks politely, he knows you feel the same exact way that he does and there’s no use in hiding it any longer. You both need to have each other.

“Of course you can,” you say and after those string of words left your lips he quickly placed his on yours. He grabbed your face with both of his hands and kissed you hard, your lips crashed together perfectly and your plan couldn’t have been executed any better. His plush lips felt like a cloud and you felt so much warmth and comfort from them. His forehead brushed against yours as he deepened the kiss, making you put your hand on his neck to bring the two of you closer by any small amount. Trying not to break the kiss he brought you over to the desk and sat you on top of it, the kiss grew heavier at this point and he gently bit your bottom lip to gain access inside your mouth. Once you gasped from the slight pressure he gave you, he let his tongue slide inside. Both of your tongues becoming intertwined and in sync with one another and it felt like fireworks rushing throughout your entire body. You grew hot as you tried keeping up with Hyunjin’s pace, he wasn’t letting you go any time soon. He trailed his free hand up your thigh and began rubbing small circles on them, his touch was so warm and gentle yet the kiss was rough and passionate. The contrast made you feel shamelessly aroused. This was the moment you’ve dreamed of. His firm embrace made you feel safe and his lips made you feel drunk. He was such a good kisser, no wonder he had girls going crazy spreading false rumors about him. You’re already hooked on him that you want to gatekeep him from anyone else. As the two of you kept on making out for what seemed like an eternity, you were the one that finally pulled away. The both of you panting and trying your best to catch your breathes. You look up at him as small pearls of sweat were dripping from his forehead, he gave his all with you. You traced a few lines around his bicep while staring at his gorgeous face, you still couldn’t fathom how fine the tall man was.

“We really shouldn’t be doing this… you should go Y/n,” Hyunjin says to you with a disappointed look on his face, “I could get in so much trouble right now, I’m sorry for doing this”

You shook your head at his thoughts, “How would we get in trouble? No one has to know about any of this, I’ll keep our little secret safe,” you grab his shirt collar to pull him closer for another kiss, he hesitates but eventually kisses you back. He puts even more passion into this one and you felt weightless in his touch. You felt numb, all you felt was Hyunjin’s pretty lips, he felt so good against you. He tasted so sweet and held you so tight, you didn’t know what you expected when kissing him but this was much better than what you could’ve ever imagined. Once you both pull away again your breathing became so irregular. You could tell that your hair was a bit messed up and the lip gloss you were wearing has now been completely transferred onto his lips. His lips were red and puffy from all the pressure and it just made him look even more attractive than he already is. Hyunjin ran his thumb over your lips while licking his, he wanted to taste every last drop of you.

“You are so special to me Y/n,” Hyunjin says in a husky tone while still trying to catch his breath.

“I’m glad you see me that way,” You say as you smile.

“I want to see you tomorrow, outside of school, is that okay?” He asks.

“Yes, I’d love that,” You couldn’t be more than happy to see him outside of class, you want to know more about Hyunjin, who he is as a person, the not so picture perfect cookie cutter version that he portrays to everyone else.

“Would you like to meet me for coffee around 6? It’s on me by the way, I’d never make you pay for anything,” He says resting his palm on your thigh once again. His hands felt so good against your skin, you couldn’t get enough of his physical touch.

“Of course, I’ll be there Mr. Hwang” you assure him.

“How many times do I have to tell you again… call me Hyunjin,” this time he sounded more serious than the last time.

“Oh yes– sorry Hyunjin,”

“If you do that again I’ll make sure you never get through this class with flying colors,” he squeezes your thigh, causing you to whimper a little bit.

“Give me your phone, let me give you my cell number” he continues on as if he didn’t just threaten your whole life. You do as you’re told and hand him your phone with the contact template for him to fill out. He types everything he needed and hands it back to you, you look at the contact name, ‘Hyunjin<3’ simple yet adorably effective. You do the same on his phone and you get ready to leave to head back to your dorm yet he stops you once again.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He asks.

“Back to my dorm?” you say, unsure of what else he has to say to you now after everything that happened.

“At this time of night? I don’t think so, let me drive you back home” Hyunjin insists. You agree to his offer and he takes you back to your dorm safely.

You weren’t getting any sleep tonight. Your head was only full of thoughts of Hyunjin, his addictive aura, his lips, his everything. You loved every bit of him already. You think to yourself if you should even be feeling this way yet you know now that the feeling is mutual so it’s not a one-sided crush anymore. You know it's wrong to be doing this and even he acknowledged that fact but even though it’s wrong, it feels very right. You want him and he wants you so bad about that? Yeah he may be your college professor but you’re both grown adults, you’re allowed to make decisions for yourself and so can he.

You’re not sure how this might end up but you want to enjoy this as much as you can and your coffee date with Hyunjin tomorrow has you more excited than ever. You know you won’t be able to tell anyone about this, even your friends, you have to keep your word with Hyunjin and you promised to keep it a secret between the both of you. This will definitely be a hard task for you but you’re up for the challenge, you were willing to make sacrifices to get any ounce of his attention, and now that you fully have it, you weren’t going to do anything to take that away from you.

End<3

#skz fluff #skz x reader #stray kids imagines #hwang hyunjin #hyunjin fluff #hyunjin stray kids #skz drabbles #skz imagines #skz scenarios #stray kids drabbles #hyunjin skz #hyunjin #hwang hyunjin x reader #hyunjin smut #hyunjin imagines #hyunjin drabbles #hyunjin x reader

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teddy06writes · 4 years

Note

could we have more sapnap x karl x quackity x reader maybe about how reader joins, or how the relationship is revealed, or angst, also is there a reason that anon asks are turned off? i mean it might just be me also cause i cant switch to anon, ik that hairbrush anon loves this blog and wants to request but they cant cause anon is turned off, (i know hairbrush anon irl so thats how ik this for some background context) sorry if this is rude

anon: “ Your karlnapity fanfics are sooooo good. I was wondering if you could make another one, it could be about literally anything and I’ll read it. Keep up the great work! “

sapnap x karl x quackity x reader

trigger warnings: swearing, mentions of panic attacks

premise: how you joined the Karlnapity poly cue

{also the anon thing was fixed once I got this ask}

“belp” talking

‘blep’ texting

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You didn’t meet them intentionally, far from, actually, you had only met Alex, the first of the boys you’d met, by pure chance.

Well, pure chance, and an asshole who didn’t look where he was going outside A hall.

You had just emerged from your first class of the year, a debate class, with maybe 50 students total, and were immediately slammed into by some jerk who didn’t even stop at first.

You had fallen into someone, who after making sure you were stood up right began to cuss the guy out in Spanish.

“You got something to say to me, dick?” The guy had asked as he turned around.

“Yeah bitch! Why the hell did you push them?”

If you thought this dudes 5′ 9′’ ass wasn’t gonna square up to a huge football player you’d’ve been wrong.

“They were the one who didn’t fucking move, so don’t fucking start with me!”

“Bro you literally slammed into them! You could’ve fucking moved man!” He shoved the guys shoulder, “You didn’t have to take the asshole route, yet we’re still here.”

“Listen Dick, I don’t give a shit, they were in the fucking way.”

“Man your really looking for a fucking fight are you?” He shrugged off his back pack and let it drop to the ground.

The guys laughed, pushing up his sleeves, “I could take your scrawny ass any day, chicca.”

Before he had a chance to blink a fist had been launched toward his face, catching him right in the jaw.

He stumbled back, looking almost as surprised as the guy you’d tripped into, who was looking down at his own fist, clearly in pain.

“Oh you little bitch!” The jock growled, moving to punch him back.

Quickly you scooped up his bag, shoving it into his arms, “We gotta go!!” You shoved the guy, grabbing your saviors hand and tugging him along as you started to run.

As you dodged around campus, trying to lose the yell of the jock behind you the guy who you’d dragged with, offered, “I’m Alex.”

“(y/n),” You slowed to a stop, “I think we lost him.”

Alex nodded, wincing as he examined his knuckles.

You took his hand, checking over it carefully, “It’ll bruise hard, you might not have full dexterity for a while. That’s what you get for punching someone without preparing,” You chuckled, glancing around, “My dorm’s not more than five minutes away, if you don’t have another class to get too, we can go get you some ice.”

“That’d be good.” He winced.

After taking him back to your dorm and getting his hand iced, he disappeared, saying he was late to meet someone, and you rarely saw him again except for your debate class, where you hardly spoke.

~~ You’d met Nick not too long after, though this time, pure chance was more purely your friend George catching you sneaking out of a party you didn’t want to be at.

“Seriously (y/n)? It’s barley even been an hour!” The brit yelled.

“It’s way too loud in there,” You hissed, motioning to the frat house, “I can’t hardly think, let alone stand it.”

“George! Get back in here! Clay challenged someone to a drinking contest and it about to start!” Someone yelled from the house.

“Yeah, in a second Sapnap!” He called before turning back to you, “Stay a little while longer?”

“I don’t want to be here.” You growled, but he was already dragging you back towards the house, saying:

“Come on, it’ll be entertaining if he wins and if not, well, it’ll still be pretty funny.”

Sighing, you allowed yourself to be pulled back inside, following George through to where Clay stood across a counter from a curly dark haired man, and Niki, a woman you’d met a few weeks prior, quietly pouring shots.

“Now the only reason I’m letting you do this Wil, is cause I know you won’t be able to do more than three.” She muttered, sliding the shots between them.

George laughed, “This is gonna be great!”

You sighed, moving to stand back against one of the walls, next to a dirty blonde man, who said, “You don’t look to happy to be here.”

“Not a fan of the noise.” You muttered, rubbing at your forehead.

He nodded, “Makes sense, one of my boyfriends doesn’t like the noise either. I’m Nick.”

“Didn’t George just call you Sapnap? What is with people around here and having weird nicknames?” You shook your head with another sigh, “I’m (y/n).”

“I dunno. Half the people I know at this school have weird nicknames,” He began to point at various people around the room, “Dream, Fundy, Skeppy, Hbomb, Quackity’s around here somewhere. Hell I even know someone who calls himself ‘Technoblade’.”

“Sounds like a prick.” You chuckled.

Nick nodded, “Oh he is.”

You continued to talk for a while, watching as Wilbur tried to out drink Clay, and failing miserably not to laugh when he nearly fell down, totally wasted.

“Hey, uh I think we should head out. I feel bad leaving Kar...” Alex trailed off as he realized you were standing with Nick, “Hey, your uh, (y/n) right?”

“Yeah, Alex, you almost busted your knuckles trying to fight McAllen outside debate with Fenner.” You chuckled.

Nick turned to Alex, “You what?!”

“uhh...” he stuttered nervously.

“You told Karl you fell!”

“In my defense he pushed- no not even- he slammed into (y/n)!” Alex said desperately.

“He did, Alex was just defending me,” Alex grinned at your addition, “But...” his face fell, “This one also is essentially just an angry chihuahua.”

“Dude!”

Nick chuckled, “Their right. You are an angry chihuahua.”

Alex rolled his eyes, glancing at his phone, “We should go, Karl’s texting me angry emojis.”

Nick nodded, “It was nice to meet you (y/n).”

“You too.” You smiled, and then they were gone again.

You didn’t meet Karl for almost a month after that, only encountering the man in the colorful sweater when you had been left sitting alone in the dining hall, after a late night study session.

Niki had left a few minutes earlier, but it was long enough that he’d assumed you’d been sitting alone.

“Oh hey, sorry I’m late!” He had called, just a hair too loud.

You blinked up at the mousy haired boy, confused for a moment, before motioning for him to sit down, “It’s okay.”

The few people still left in the hall barley paid attention, so you stifled a laugh, “I wasn’t waiting for someone, my friend just left actually.”

His face got red, “Oh, I- sorry- I’ll just leave then.”

He started to stand up but you held out a hand, “No- uh- you, can stay. I don’t mind.”

He grinned, “I’m Karl! Karl Jacobs!”

“I’m (y/n). Thank you for trying to save me from mild embarrassment.”

“It was nothin, just don’t think people should have to be alone.”

You giggled, “Knight in shining armor.”

That made Karl grin even more, giggling a bit as he asked, “Whatcha working on?”

“Oh, Niki and I were just studying for finals, it may be a few weeks away but I want to be ready.” You chuckled.

“Man, I’m glad I’m only taking one class this semester.”

“Lucky.” You sighed, tucking the last of your papers into folders and stowing them away in your bag, “No late night cram sessions for you then.”

“Nah, my boyfriends’ll rope me into helping them study.”

“Thats the price you pay.” You chuckled.

He nodded solemnly, “A price I am very willing to pay.”

“They sound like lucky guys.” You smiled wistfully, quietly wondering why all the cute guys you’d been meeting were dating, either other people, or each other.

Karl not noticing the almost bitterness in your voice chirped, “Yup!”

“Come on! They’d love you!” Karl exclaimed.

You’d been becoming friends with Karl over the last few months, and now he was begging you to go and meet his partners.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah!” Karl was practically bouncing up and down, “Your like the best! I want my boys to meet you!”

You groaned, letting your head fall into your hands, “Fine.”

“Yay!” Karl giggled, tugging at your wrist, “Come on!”

You looked up from the table at him. “Right now?”

“Yeah, I was suppose to be meeting them at the library.”

Sighing you stood up, “I hate this.”

He smiled sympathetically, “Sorry.”

You slipped your bag over your shoulder, and followed him out of the dining hall towards the library, trying to ignore the stupid feeling in your stomach at his hand in yours.

Upon reaching the library Karl excitedly dragged you over to a table in the corner where your stomach dropped upon seeing who was sitting there.

“(y/n)?” Alex asked.

You chuckled, “Snapmap and Chihuahua boy, I didn’t realize this Karl was your Karl.”

Karl looked confused, looking back and forth between you and his boyfriends, “You guys know each other?”

“That one talked to me at a party when my friends all but ditched me,” You pointed at Nick, and then too Alex, “That one tried to fight someone who bumped into me.”

“Thats- you know what, I’m not gonna ask.” Karl said, plopping down next to Alex.

You sat down on the opposite side of the table next to Nick, “Karl you text in angry emojis?”

Over the next few weeks Karl continued to drag you along to various study sessions, movie nights and other things you assumed would normally just be the three of them, making you confused heart even more confused.

It was strange that they willingly let you intrude on there dates, and any time you tried to bring it up with Karl he’d just brush it off, and if you mentioned it to Nick or Alex, they’d say something about how they were good with it cause Karl was.

And then one night, you were all piled up on the fire escape of the boys apartment building, Alex had just gotten back from a seminar, and was half curled on Nick’s lap, legs stretch across Karl, who was also leaning against Nick.

You quietly hummed a song you heard Wilbur playing, freezing as Karl tugged on your hand, pulling you closer to lean on him, Nick’s arm stretching just a bit farther to wrap around your waist as well, almost cementing you into the moment.

“I like this.” Karl murmured.

Alex nodded sleepily, and Nick looked at your over Karl’s head, “(y/n), uh- I guess we’ve been meaning to- uh- to ask-”

“He means, do- do you want to join this relationship?” Alex asked, cutting him off.

You blinked, surprised, and Karl quickly started talking in your silence, “You don’t have too, we just figured, you know, we, really like, you and- it- we think you like us-”

Cutting him off, you grabbed the sides of his face, quickly pressing your lips to his, and then pulling away, you leaned over to kiss Nick, and then Alex.

“I knew there was a reason you kept letting me in on your dates!”

#mcyt x reader #mcyt imagines #sapnap x reader #karl jacobs x reader #quackity x reader #sapnap x karl x quackity x reader #karlnapity #karlnapity x reader #teddy06 writes

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charmingyong · 4 years

Text

Trust the Magenta Lilacs

Lilacs symbolize spring, renewal, and first love. Magenta lilacs symbolize love and passion. Regardless of colour, lilacs have a lasting association with love and romance.

Genre: Taeyong x fem!reader, university, humour, fluff, angst, slow burn, friends with benefits, friends to lovers

Characters: Y/N, Taeyong, Joy, Johnny, Yuta, Ten, Mark, Jaehyun

Warnings: slow burn, suggestive themes, talks of sex (not explicit), emotional trauma, swear words, alcohol consumption, harassment, feelings of betrayal, trust issues

Plot: You weren’t interested in relationships. But your dear friend Joy was desperate to have you living a more thrilling university life. She introduced you to a group of boys, in which one of them shook your heart.

Word count: 26k

Disclaimer: This story was inspired by a talk between my sister and her friend about their friends' relationships. Regarding this, the main characters are completely fictional and do not fully represent these people nor the true personalities of the idols casted. If you are triggered by the warnings, I advise you to either read with caution or not read this. There's only a couple of scenes which I think can be triggering for some people.

A/N: The italicized English lyrics half-way in the story is My Everything by NCT U.

- ❀ -

“I’ll be back shortly with your drinks.” Your server gave you and Joy a smile before leaving your table.

You took the time to look around the on-campus restaurant. It was just after two in the afternoon, meaning a lot of students were still in classes and explained the numerous empty tables. A soft music was playing in the background, creating a peaceful ambiance for anyone to come in and de-stress from their routine while enjoying a variety of comfort foods on the menu. Life wasn’t stressful just yet, as it was only the beginning of the fall semester of your senior year.

You brought your eyes to look at the girl sitting across from you, her gaze dreamily locked onto the retreating figure. “He’s so hot with that mustache,” she said. Once the server was out of her sight, she shifted her gaze to yours for a sign of agreement.

You didn’t say anything. In fact, you already forgot how he looked like the second he left your table and you didn’t give him a second glance. Because you didn’t care. Joy raised an eyebrow at you, waiting for your response and so you said the truth. “I don’t remember...”

Her eyes blew up in shock. “You sure you don’t have a short-term memory loss or something? How can you forget his super handsome face? Like you don’t have to look at boys just for relationships, you know that right? Unless you’re...” she trailed off with a sly smile.

You rolled your eyes at her. “If I was, I would have kissed you by now.” You stuck your tongue out at her playfully.

She let out a sigh. “I’d love to have that kiss. But jokes aside, you’re seriously missing out. You can literally do anything and your parents won’t know. Of course, I’m not suggesting that you do bad things, but looking at guys isn’t a bad thing. Maybe you’ll find a guy that catches your eye and something happens between you two. Like talking, flirting, crushing on him, becoming friends with him... maybe fall in love. When else is the perfect chance to meet boys than in university?” Joy ended off with an excited and hopeful expression on her face, wishing that you’d agreed with her.

You only shrugged nonchalantly. You weren’t scared for your parents to find out about what you were up to and you didn’t care. You knew how to your ‘me’ time in your upper years compared to when you were a freshman. Considering the amount of tea Joy brought to you to spill, you preferred staying single than having drama in your life.

You knew Joy was respective with your decision to stay single because she knew that made you feel comfortable. But at times like this, she would try to talk you into giving boys a chance. Joy didn’t want her friend to end up feeling lonely and unhappy. You only really had Joy as a good friend, thanks to your introverted personality. One time she asked you whether your decision to stay single had anything to do with your father, in which your reply was a prompt no. But you thought about it from time to time. What if it was?

She crossed her arms and leaned back in her chair. “You’re coming with me this weekend.”

“No.”

“I wasn’t asking.”

“I don’t want to.” You knew what Joy was referring to. There was a party happening this weekend. Whenever Joy went to attend parties, you stayed back at your shared apartment. You never liked the idea of going to parties when you weren’t ready to mingle with strangers.

“Before you say no again, actually take your time thinking about it, Y/N.” With that, both of your drinks arrived.

- ❀ -

“Are you sure you really, really, really don’t want to go to this party? It’s for your own good, Y/N, and I promise I won’t leave you alone.” Joy brought out her best puppy eyes and pouted with her bright shade of red lipstick on her lips. She looked stunning standing by the front door of the apartment, wearing a black mini dress under a black leather jacket.

You knew she wouldn’t leave you alone without a warning and you also knew it was for your own good. But you couldn’t care less about it. Go stubborn! “Even though you look super cute right now trying to talk me into coming with you, I’m super sure about not going to this party,” you said confidently.

Joy’s face fell momentarily before picking up her mood again. “Well then, I’ll be heading off. Don’t stay up for me in case... you know,” she winked at me and walked out the front door.

- ❀ -

You woke up the next morning with someone shaking you roughly, almost pushing you off your bed. “Y/N! You need to come with me now!”

“What the heck Joy? Let me sleep,” you groaned and snuggled under your cozy blanket. But Joy had other plans and ripped the blanket from your body, leaving you slightly cold. With the way Joy was determined to follow her agenda, you groaned and sat up. “Fine, what is it? Where are we going?”

She squealed in excitement with a huge smile plastered on her face. “We’re going to their house!”

“Whose?”

“To Johnny’s and his friends’!”

Who was Johnny? “Why are we going to their house, especially this early in the morning? Is their house some sort of museum?”

Joy giggled at your joke. “It is in a way. And Johnny invited you over.” Your eyebrows furrowed, confused that a boy you had never met invited you to his house. “He’s really a sweetheart and a gentleman and the other boys are really friendly too. You don’t have to be nervous about the meet. They’re curious to meet you after I talked about you at the party.”

You were used to this. Joy always talked about you to others as if she was running around and sharing your dating profile to prospective partners. Though she never actually tried to set you up with someone. She would only talk about you and your non-thrilling life and your vow to stay away from boys.

She never forced you to meet boys and so the fact that she was doing so then shocked you.

“Don’t worry. You will like them too. And find them hot. I just know it! All I’m asking is for you to give them a chance. Just trust me and let’s go, please?” Once again, she shot her signature puppy look at you, making you sigh in defeat.

- ❀ -

When you two reached the front door of their house, Joy knocked. As if on cue, the door opened immediately to reveal a tall guy with a beautiful smile adorning his face. “Good morning, ladies. You must be Y/N. I’m Johnny. Come on in and please make yourself feel comfortable.” He moved to the side to let you two in.

Once in the living room, Joy turned her head to give you a look. You could read her face well and knew that she was asking if you found Johnny hot. You didn’t give her any sign of response, wanting to create suspense for her.

“Joy talked about you at the party and it would be a pleasure to meet you. I’m glad she loved my idea and brought you over to meet me and the others.”

“But why would u want to meet me?”

He gasped, not believing that you didn’t know the reason yourself. “You’re seriously asking me that? It would be a huge honour to hear you call me handsome. Girls always compliment me about my dashing looks that it would be interesting when a beautiful girl like you would say otherwise.”

Beautiful girl? “You’ve never seen me before. How would know if I was beautiful?”

“Because everyone is beautiful.” A voice was heard behind Johnny and a boy appeared beside him. “Hello princess, I’m Yuta. Always at ladies’ service,” Yuta said with a smile and a wink.

Your heart fluttered yet also cringed a little internally with his flirty manner. Joy had warned you in advance of a flirtatious guy named Yuta. The good thing with him was that he made sure to stay within his limits and he wouldn’t do anything to make the receiving end feel uncomfortable. You hadn’t known him for even a minute and you weren’t not sure whether you should like him or be wary of him. Though you had to give him points for saying that everyone was beautiful. “I like that you guys think everyone is beautiful.”

He chuckled. “Think? Oh no. It’s a fact, princess.”

Another boy showed up. “Wait, what’s the fact?”

“Everyone is beautiful.”

“Oh yes I agree. Everyone is, especially my Johnny. He once grew out his hair past his shoulders and I fell in love with him all over again. By the way I’m Ten, and you are Y/N, right?”

“Yes.”

“Ah the Y/N Joy talked about last night. It’s a pleasure to meet you, princess,” Yuta gave you a smile so beautiful that made your heart heal a little. “But I have to say. Mark sleeping on such an honourable guest is quite disrespectful.

Johnny nodded. “I agree. Mark!” he yelled. “Quit sleeping and come down! The royal highness is here!” You were starting to think whether these boys’ sanity was okay, treating you like you needed the red carpet to walk on.

A faint grumble was heard from above, followed by some light footsteps making their way down the stairs. In entered a boy you guessed was Mark. His face was scrunched up with his messy bed hair. When his eyes landed on you, his eyes blew up and looked like he was fully awake now, flustered that your first impression of him was his sleepy appearance. “Oh hi there. I’m Mark,” he greeted you with a smile.

Ten snickered. “Y/N knows since you needed a special wakeup call from hyung.”

Mark elbowed him in the ribs, making Ten let out a small cry of pain.

“Mark! We don’t condone violence in this house, especially in front of ladies,” Johnny scolded.

“But hyung-”

“No!”

Mark grumbled under his breath. “Not fair.”

Yuta heard him. “Do you want a boo-boo kiss for hyung being mean, Markie?”

“What the hell hyung? No!”

You were grateful that Joy dragged you out of bed to meet a bunch of boys you’d never seen before. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t find them attractive. They were pretty handsome. But that was it. You didn’t feel anything else inside you that would make you want to interact with them in a manner more than friends. The way the boys were polite with you and playful with each other made you want to be friends with them.

In the midst of everything happening from the boys pulling each other’s legs (not literally thankfully) to your train of thoughts, you didn’t hear the front door open. From the corner of your eyes, you saw a figure appear that stood a few feet away from you. When you shifted your focus onto it, your breathing stopped momentarily and your blood rushed faster inside you. The boy’s gaze was locked on you, not moving a single muscle to see what his housemates were up to. His poker face intimidated you, and you felt like a deer caught in headlights, paralyzed. What shocked you the most was his big brown eyes, so large that you could see yourself in the middle of the galaxy.

- ❀ -

“Y/N, are you taking any easy courses right now?” Ten asked. “One of my classes is going to drive me crazy and I want to switch out.”

After all the boys were introduced to you and numbers were exchanged, Johnny suggested having breakfast together. You sat with Joy and your new friends at a nearby diner, talking about school while eating your meal.

“Hmm... how about Korean? I’m taking the beginner’s course so it’s all basics.”

He nodded looking satisfied. “Having the others around already has me knowing the basics. So that sounds like a good class to me.”

“I’m going to switch too,” Yuta blurted.

Mark was surprised with Yuta’s announcement out of the blue. “I thought you liked all your classes. And you’re super fluent in Korean.”

“Where’s the fun if I’m not around Y/N? Plus, they don’t have paper proof on me that I’m better at Korean than you.”

“HYUNG!”

While you were busy talking about the course syllabus and who they should contact as there was an upcoming quiz, Taeyong felt his mobile vibrate in his pocket. He pulled it out to see a message from Lez. “I’m going to see Lez today,” he informed Johnny who was sitting across from him at the end of the table.

“Weren’t you gonna hang out with someone already today?” Johnny asked.

Taeyong nodded. “Yeah, Brie. But I’m meeting Lez before the party tonight so I’ll get to the party with her.”

“Alright man.”

Joy overheard them and she wasn’t sure how to feel about Taeyong. She hadn’t been able to learn much about him at the party, considering he was absent most of the time when she talked to the others. All she heard about him was that he had many girls in his contacts.

“There’s another party tonight?” you asked from Mark’s outburst when he challenged Yuta to rap his verse that he prepared for the party.

“Of course! It’s Saturday. Parties happen until Sunday even.”

“I mean- I know that but Joy didn’t tell me...” and you figured it was her plan to have you clueless until she could strike her chance to persuade you. If you had known beforehand, you would have slammed a big fat NO on her face. You turned to Joy with suspicious eyes, but she only looked at you with innocence, batting her eyelashes.

“You are coming right?” Yuta asked you.

Ten spoke up, not willing to take any objections. “Of course she is! Now that she has us, we’re dragging her to the party. We’re not having her miss out on another party. She needs to live a little.”

Mark nodded agreeing with him. “Yes Y/N, you really should come. You can just hang around us. Please?”

With the way Mark pleaded you with his adorable cute eyes and pouted lips, you couldn’t help but agree to finally go to your first ever party in university. “Okay.”

Everyone at the table let out various noises of excitement. You could have sworn you saw Joy’s eyes tear up in happiness. Johnny, who was silently watching the commotion, smiled at you, pleased with your decision.

That was everyone except for Taeyong, who was smirking at his phone.

- ❀ -

“So how do you feel about the boys? Was I right?”

You and Joy said your goodbyes to the boys from the diner and drove back to your apartment. The boys decided to pick you and Joy up tonight and go to the party together. You slumped down onto the couch, feeling good about the interaction and making new friends. “Yes, you were. They’re friendly and funny too. Gosh that was so nerve-wracking on our way there though, not knowing what to expect.”

Joy punched the air in glory of her victory. “Yes, yes, yes! Okay but the main question is do you find them hot?” she asked eagerly. Your nod made Joy do a big happy dance and yelled out a “Finally!”

“They’re all pretty handsome. I would actually hit myself if I said they weren’t. But that’s about it. I don’t feel anything else towards them.” It was the truth. Their good looks didn’t spark anything else inside you besides warmth from their playful interactions that you witnessed. The only exception did go to-

“That’s fine! To hear you finally find a guy attractive is enough for me to die in peace.” She closed her eyes and wiped away her nonexistent tears. “But who struck you the most?”

When your gaze was locked on the boy with deep brown eyes, you heard Johnny introduce you to Taeyong. You shifted your sight to the owner of the voice and that was when you learned that the name of the boy who made you feel uneasy was Taeyong. You felt your breathing somewhat come back once your eyes were anywhere except on him, but your stiffness was still there. His mere presence made you feel intimidated by him, which was why you tried to sit as far away as possible from him at the diner. Though out of all the boys you met, he was the most good-looking.

“Taeyong,” you answered.

Her face fell at your answer, which wasn’t the reaction you expected. “What do you feel with Taeyong?” Joy grew anxious.

“You don’t look happy.”

“I’m sorry. I just don’t know how to feel with Taeyong. I haven’t really talked to him at the party and I don’t want you to get involved with him more than just friends.”

To say you were shocked was an understatement. After all this time of Joy getting you to interact with boys, she placed a restriction with the one you found the most good-looking. It wasn’t a problem anyway as you didn’t feel anything else with Taeyong except for running away from him. “But why?”

She shook her head. “I don’t know the truth and I don’t want to sound like I’m judging him without knowing the truth. But it seems like I’m already doing that,” she chuckled to herself. “He... talks to a lot of girls.”

You were confused. What was that supposed to mean? “Does he like fuck around with them?”

“Well I don’t know about that, but he is seeing a lot of girls and he’s not officially in a relationship with anyone so it’s not like he’s two-timing or cheating, but... You know I don’t want you getting hurt, especially since I forced this whole meeting boys thing on you. I don’t want him to mislead you and have something more than friends going on but at the end breaks it off and hurts you. I just want you to be happy without getting hurt.”

You nodded, understanding her. “I know you only want the best for me, Joy.”

She laughed quietly. “Remember what I said one time if you were to ever have a boyfriend?”

You smiled, vividly reminiscing her words. “That you’ll do a background check on him to make sure he’s good.”

She nodded. “Because I don’t want you to go through what I did with my past exes. Being friends with Taeyong is fine. Anything more than that and I’m not going to sit around and do nothing.”

- ❀ -

“Y/N! Are you ready yet?”

The evening rolled in faster than you expected and you were nowhere near ready for the party. You were going to your first ever party in university so you wanted to dress up the very best. However, your wardrobe was lacking the appropriate attire for the event.

Joy walked into your bedroom to check up on you. “What’s taking so long, girl?”

You sighed loudly, giving up on your search for the perfect outfit and you lied down on your bed feeling disappointed. “I can’t find anything to wear.”

Joy walked up to your open wardrobe and shuffled your clothes around. She paused and picked something up, showing you her selection. “This is so cute!” she gushed. “I’ve never seen you wear this.”

Lifting your head up, you saw her holding a top that you had never worn before. Because you didn’t have the confidence to do so. “I’m not wearing that.”

She rolled her eyes. “You’re wearing this or I’m going to make you wear one of my dresses.”

That was all she had to say before you jumped onto your feet and snatched the top from her hand. Your friend snickered, knowing how much you hated wearing dresses.

You heard a phone ring, making Joy pull out her phone and answer the call. “Hey John!” she greeted in a sweet tone. “Okay, we’ll be there in a bit.” She shoved her phone back in her pocket. “The boys are here waiting for us.”

- ❀ -

Johnny parked the car on the road among many other cars and your group walked down the sidewalk that lead up to the extravagant exterior of the house. Once inside, you were amazed by the humongous space and even more by the number of people occupying it. Students were talking with red solo cups in their hands, dancing with the music blasting from the hi-fi stereo system, playing games and laughing at the losers. If Joy or any of your new friends left you alone, you were going to cry. You did not fit in here with your monotone studious life.

Johnny informed your group that Taeyong was going to arrive at the party on his own. You weren’t sure whether you hoped to find him or avoid crossing his path. He hadn’t talked with you at all yet, neither at their house nor at the diner. Your theory was that he was a quiet boy. But if Joy was right, then how would a quiet boy have many girls in his contacts? He had to have talked to initiate something with them. But then considering his looks, girls would have approached him first. You were close to concluding that Taeyong didn’t like you and that was a problem if you and Joy were going to hang out with the boys often. He was going to be unavoidable unless he was busy himself. As if the thought of him not liking you wasn’t enough, you on the other hand were simply intimidated with the aura he radiated when looking into his eyes.

“Y/N, follow me!” Ten grabbed your hand and led you to the other side of the house. There was some space by the wall, looking like a stage for performances to occur. You were curious what acts were going to take place.

An unknown guy showed up with a mic on the stage. “Yo whatzzup everyone?” The crowd who was there to see the stage cheered loudly. “Alright so we got the Misfit gang ready to perform. Are you ready for a rocking, roof raising performance by them?”

A collection of loud yeses and cheers had the music begin. No one was on the stage yet, leaving the performer a surprise. Right before the verse began, Mark stepped onto the stage with a mic, making your eyes blow up in shock.

“I’m a misfit manneun fit jachega eopji

Sumi teokteok makin oseul ibeun neukkim

Jigyeopji gomin eopsi geunyang rip it

Nareul kkeureonaeriryeo halsurok get lifted”

You gawked at Mark and his ability to spit fire just minutes after arriving to the party. You realized that the rap Mark was referring to over breakfast was the performance for Misfit.

And what followed next was beyond your wildest imagination. The crowd parted to let Taeyong walk to the stage while rapping his verse.

“Aesseo nal jaedanharyeoneun geon dwaesseo

Jigeum idaero ga the best never mess up

Uisimi eopji geujeo bring it to the next

Nan deunneun bangbeobeul molla I’m a def”

You were struck by how handsome he looked wearing a black button-down shirt and ripped jeans with matching hair colour that made his beautiful face stand out even more. And though you were still intimidated by him, your heart couldn’t help itself from fluttering at how handsome he looked as a performer.

One after another, the rappers made their way to the stage at the appropriate time for their verses. Johnny was the last one to jump on and his entry made the girls in the audience squeal in delight. It seemed like Johnny was quite a catch for the ladies.

When all the rappers sang the ending chorus, you were dazed by Taeyong’s presence on stage and the power he held. And it was not just you who slightly swooned over him, but other girls and boys too. After their performance ended, you heard a guy from the crowd yell “I love you Taeyong!” that resulted in a series of confessions being thrown from the audience to the rappers on the stage.

“So did you like their performance?” Ten asked you.

You nodded slowly, still in shock with the adrenaline-rushing performance that you were blessed to see. “Yeah totally! I didn’t know they could rap like that.”

“As expected from the aces,” Yuta said.

“Totally,” Ten agreed. “Oh hyung! Wanna go grab some drinks? Y/N, do you want some too?”

You were starting to feel a bit anxious with the number of people you were surrounded with. Before entering the place, you noticed a balcony on the second floor and wished to go there so that you could breathe comfortably. “Sure but am I allowed to go on the second floor? I want some fresh air.”

Yuta nodded. “Of course. You’re allowed to go anywhere unless there’s a sign that says otherwise. I’ll come up with your drink,” he smiled at you before Ten dragged him away.

The staircase was easily spotted and right when you took a step, you forgot about Joy ever since Ten dragged you away for the stage. You tried looking around, but you couldn’t spot your friend. Pulling out your phone, you found a notification from her.

Joy: Looks like you’re in good hands ;) call me if you need me <3 have fun!

You let out a breath of relief, grateful that Joy wasn’t mad at you for forgetting about her. With that, you made your way up the stairs and down the hallway to the room you guessed had the balcony. The door was fully open, displaying a full view of the balcony. Perfect! You poked your head in to make sure no one was inside. All clear! Walking up to the balcony, you leaned on the railing and took a fresh deep breath of the chilly night, instantly relaxing.

It wasn’t long until you heard footsteps that made you turn on your heel to see who was coming in your direction.

Taeyong.

With a girl beside him.

Hands linked together.

When he saw you face him, he held your gaze for a few seconds, his face unreadable before disappearing into the room adjacent to yours.

He did it again. He made you feel anxious. And a thing you confirmed about him was that he did have something going on with girls that involved a bedroom.

You left your room as you had no interest to listen to their private activity. Halfway down the hall, Yuta showed up with a drink in each hand. “What’s up, princess?” he asked, handing you your drink.

“I’m not feeling the balcony anymore.”

He peeked over your shoulder at the vacant balcony room behind you, giving you a look like you were crazy for ditching an awesome quieter spot compared to the floor below. “Come on! It’s empty and the view looks great.” He began walking in the direction of the balcony room until…

Noises were heard behind the closed doors.

He stopped in his tracks and realized why you were against the idea. A smirk made its way onto his face and he pointed an index finger at the room Taeyong was in, silently asking you if that was your reason.

You nodded.

Yuta strolled back to where you were fixed. “So you really are a virgin?”

You felt embarrassed. It sounded like you should have lost your v-card being a senior student. “Yeah…”

“It’s nothing to be ashamed of, Y/N. I had a guess that you were when Joy talked about you.”

“It’s embarrassing.”

He shook his head, disagreeing with you. “No, it’s not. There’s nothing wrong with that. People have their reasons for doing it or not.”

That made you think about Taeyong. What was his reason? Was it just to satisfy his sexual desire? Was it something else?

“What’s your reason? Waiting for someone special?” he asked.

You did have your reason, but it wasn’t the one Yuta guessed. You were never interested in that special someone to come into your life and for that reason, you chucked the idea of ever having your first time out the window. Sure, one-night stands existed but losing your virginity to a complete stranger didn’t appeal to you. “No, I’m not waiting for anyone special. I am… like curious… but I wasn’t interested with any guy to… you know?”

He cocked his head to the side, amused. “I should have seen that coming. But are you still not into guys? Because…” he trailed off, pointing his thumb towards himself.

You raised an eyebrow. “Because…?”

He laughed. “Are you serious? Am I not handsome?”

Oh. For a brief moment, you thought he was implying you to have sex with him. You were almost positive that he was. To answer his question, “You are handsome, Yuta.” You remembered your first impression of his, debating whether to like him or not. After talking more with him, you realized he was only being nice to you and so you warmed up to him fairly quickly.

The pride he felt with your confession brought a huge smile on his face. “You do know how much it means for me to hear that from you, right? Any guy would die to hear that from you, princess.”

You frowned. “I don’t think that’s true.”

“Nonsense. Don’t sell yourself short. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen,” he stated seriously.

It wasn’t that you thought you weren’t beautiful in your eyes. You were beautiful. But it was the thought of what if you weren’t attractive to the opposite sex that made you keep denying it, especially if they were only saying it to act polite. The way Yuta looked at you with soft sparkling eyes made your heart melt and so you believed his words.

Right at that time, you heard a door open and saw the girl with Taeyong earlier leave the room, followed by the boy himself. His skin was slightly flushed, couple of buttons on his shirt undone, and his hair a bit messier than before entering the room. He noticed you and Yuta standing afar and walked up to you both after sending a “see you later” to the girl. “Hey Yuta,” he greeted his friend first before acknowledging you. “Hi Y/N.”

And he did it again. Looking at you with his indifferent expression before turning to Yuta to exchange a few words. Your heart was beating so fast with your sight locked on his handsome yet intimidating side profile.

He looked at you for a brief moment, quietly muttering “see you later,” and made his way towards the staircase.

Your heart rate returned to normal after he left, but you were worried that it wasn’t going to be the last time seeing him that night. The untouched drink in your hand was the perfect solution to your concern and you downed it in one go, burning your throat.

- ❀ -

The next day, you and Joy went to their house after lunch. Joy had a review session with Johnny and Ten for math and while you knew Joy had put it off till her last year to finish the requirement, you were surprised that Johnny did the same. Ten being a year younger than them took the course at the same time in order to be with Johnny.

“Damn these first-year courses having huge lecture halls and being jam packed. We could have met earlier!” Ten whined.

“I know right!” Joy exclaimed.

You didn’t have anything else to do as your courses were fairly light for the first few weeks. The only thing in your agenda was your Korean quiz coming up in the middle of the week. For that, you had the word list saved on your phone to pull up easily. You tagged along with Joy hoping to hang around more with your new friends.

Johnny came back into the living room, looking nervous. “Uh guys, we have a problem. I can’t find the textbook.”

“What?! Hyung I trusted you!” It turned out that Ten didn’t purchase the textbook in order to save money. Why buy one when your friend had one?

“Oh no. I didn’t buy one thinking I can just go to the library and sign one out,” Joy said.

“We can just do that then. Go to the library,” Johnny suggested.

Ten groaned. “I hate libraries. It’s too quiet and serious. But we don’t have another choice, do we?”

Johnny only gave him a look, not saying anything.

With a sigh and an “okay,” Ten began gathering his stuff and shoving it in his backpack.

Johnny did the same and in the middle of it, he asked you, “Are you okay with library, Y/N?”

It was pointless to go there just to review off your phone. “No. Is anyone else here? Otherwise I’ll head home.”

Ten spoke up. “Mark is already at the library, the studious freshman he is. Yuta went out with his other friends. The only one left is Taeyong and he’s chilling in his room.”

Shit.

The conflict of deciding whether to stay or leave for home right at the moment was your fight-or-flight response talking. Taeyong was in the house. Alone. That thought made you want to fight and courageously talk to him and clear things up about his behaviour with you. Even though that idea had you panicky and wanting to flee, it had to be done because you wished to be on everyone’s good terms in the group.

“Okay. I’ll stay here then.”

Joy gave a you an unreadable look, which was a first. You could always read her no matter what the situation. But that moment had you guessing. Did she not like the idea of you being around Taeyong? Didn’t she say it was okay to be friends with him only? Was she worried for you? It was almost like she was warning you to be careful.

“Taeyong! We’re going to the library and Y/N will be here!” Johnny yelled up the stairs. There was no response.

“Hyung might have his headphones on.”

Nodding in agreement, Johnny said to you, “Okay Y/N. Feel free to make yourself at home. You’re welcome to have anything in the kitchen if hungry, watch or play on the TV. Anything. Understood?” He was making sure that you weren’t going to keep to yourself and feel like a stranger in the house.

“I’ll try,” you smiled at the heartfelt words.

Once ready they left, and you felt uneasy. You thought his mere presence just inches from you made your heart pump faster. But being alone in the house with him upstairs was slowly killing you.

You opted to sit on the couch and review the word list on your phone. After going through half the list, you hear a door open upstairs and soft footsteps making their way down the stairs. Your body stiffened, hands sweating, and the speed at which your blood was pumping made you feel a little lightheaded.

On his way to the kitchen, Taeyong froze in his tracks upon noticing a quiet girl on the couch.

You shifted your gaze to look at the flustered boy. He didn’t expect you to be alone.

“Hi,” you squeaked, your voice betraying you as if it had chosen the flight response and jumped out the window.

He recovered from the surprise and greeted you back. “Hi. Where are the others?”

You cleared your throat hoping your voice to come back and informed him of the situation.

He nodded in understanding. Ditching the reason for going to the kitchen in the first place, he walked to where you sat and settled down on the couch across from you. “You stayed,” he stated it in a way to indirectly question you the reason for your stay when no one else was downstairs.

You badly wanted to ask him something, but you were a little scared. Honestly, you were extremely terrified, but you didn’t want to admit it. He didn’t give any signs away whether he liked you or not. You couldn’t think of a single reason as to why he would hate you. If he liked you, as an acquaintance, then he was really good at hiding his emotions.

You cleared your throat again. “Taeyong, can I ask you something?”

He nodded.

Your heart was pounding against your chest, scared to hear his answer. “Do you not like me? I meant like... do you hate me?”

Taeyong’s eyes went big at your question. He never thought he was giving off that kind of message that made you think he hated you. He knew he wasn’t talking to you like the way others did. But it was for a reason that was opposite to not liking you. He really was into you and wanted to get to know you better. But his fear stopped him from talking to you.

He didn’t realize his silence was making you restless and made you jump to your conclusion. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what it is that made you not like me but if you let me know-”

“No! I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to act the way I did. It’s just that I like you and I don’t know what you’ve heard about me and I don’t want to mess up and I- I really don’t know what to say.” He buried his head in his hands, frustrated that he couldn’t find it in him to explain himself clearly.

You on the other hand went still by his outburst. “You like me?”

His head shot up in alarm. “No no no! I mean yes but no not like that. I mean like friends.”

You let out a breath of relief and flashed a small yet sincere smile. Both from knowing that Taeyong liked you and as friends only. You were not ready for a confession that fast from a guy that you had met recently without much interactions, especially from the one that made you feel intimidated. After hearing that him not liking you wasn’t true and seeing his softer side through his rambling, your heart rate started to return to normal and you no longer felt uneasy around him like you did before.

His fingers became fidgety, nervously wanting to ask you something. “Have you heard about me?”

You didn’t know what to say for a moment. You didn’t want him to think that you were judging him from the little information Joy told you and what you saw last night. Nodding slowly, you said, “Kind of, but I want to hear it from you. I heard you have a lot of girls in your contacts.”

Taeyong half smiled at you. “You’re right I talk to girls. But…” He was trying to come up with the right words without making him sound like a fuckboy or player even if the case sounded like that. “I make it clear with them in the beginning that I only want to be friends with them, or even taking it further to being friends with benefits if they want. No relationships so I’m not playing with anyone’s heart.”

Oh. “So the girls that you talk to are only your friends?”

He flashed a smile. “Yes. I promise I’m not a fuckboy.”

It didn’t make sense to you. What was the big issue with that?

“I know what you’re thinking.” He looked down at his hands. “I seek something from them. And if I’m not getting it, I don’t talk to them.”

Personal gain? But not sex? “They’re not your true friends, are they?”

He shook his head. “Not like the boys.”

“What is it that you need from them?”

He closed his eyes, sort of wishing he never started the conversation. It made him feel vulnerable and open to you when he had only known you, well seen you for a day. No one had ever asked him for the truth. The boys would only assume it was what he wanted and they knew Taeyong would tell them if he was in a relationship. They would observe his behaviour around the girls and he never flirted in a way to mislead them. All the girls knew what he wanted, and those more obsessive would try their ways to win his heart in hopes of a commitment from him and earn the girlfriend title. But that never happened with the boundaries set beforehand. Whenever a case arose of a girl finding her significant other, it was the time for him to end the friendship. Call it friendships or flings, he didn’t know. He could care less because at the end of the day, all he sought from the girls were…

“Affection.”

Taeyong came from a damaged household where his parents were divorced when he was in middle school. Too busy with their own lives, neither of them gave him, their only child, the love and attention every child needed growing up. Ever since, he had been searching for it without getting into relationships. He didn’t want himself or the other person to get hurt in a commitment, and this was him speaking on behalf of his trauma.

Taeyong told you everything. As the conversation went on, he realized he was bleeding his heart out to you. He didn’t know why he was sharing his deepest fear with you, the one he had never told another living soul before. Maybe it was the way you were willing to listen to him and gently ask questions that wouldn’t prick his heart.

He trusted you and that scared him.

You were speechless after he finished talking, feeling guilty for considering that he was a fuckboy. Your heart ached from listening to the trauma he experienced as a little boy. “You must have been through a lot.”

When he looked at you, you lost your breath again. But this time for a different reason.

The tears in his eyes.

“I- I’m so so sorry Taeyong.” You felt extremely guilty for letting your curiosity get the best of you.

He wiped his tears away. “Don’t be. I’ve never opened up to anyone and now that I did... it feels kind of good.”

You felt your heart flip and were grateful to be the one soul that Taeyong confided in. “Can I ask you a question?”

He chuckled softly. “You’ve been doing that all this time.”

“Can we be friends?”

He blinked. “Do you mean friends like the other girls or real?”

“Real friends. Probably like the way I’ll be with the other boys here. A real friendship... like the way I’m with Joy.”

The smile that slowly made its way onto his face was the most beautiful smile that you had ever seen in your life. It made you want to have a one-on-one talk with your heart and stop confusing the hell out of you for it to pound in your chest again.

“I’d love that.”

- ❀ -

The day of your Korean quiz arrived and you were eager to put your Korean learning skills to test. After the class ended in the evening, you got into the passenger seat of Yuta’s car and Ten took a seat in the back.

“How was the quiz, guys?” you asked.

They were able to swiftly catch up from what they missed the first class. Ten went over the word list a few times while Yuta scanned over it once and never looked back at it.

“Easy peasy lemon squeezy,” Yuta said calmly. You laughed at his choice of words.

“Same but I might have made a mistake,” Ten laughed at himself, not worrying too much of the first quiz.

“You would make a mistake if it was in English too.”

“Hyung, you’re so mean!”

“Why would Ten?” you asked Yuta.

“He can speak five languages so his brain is scattered all over the place.”

You were mind blown by the learning ability of the boy sitting behind you. “Seriously Ten?”

“Oh yeah! My mother tongue is Thai, I grew up learning English, then I learned Korean from the boys, then a little Mandarin from my other friends, and I’m learning a little bit of Japanese from Yuta.”

Damn. This guy was impressive. “I’ll be really impressed if you do better on the Korean quiz than me.”

“Wanna bet?”

“Sure. On what?” You were confident that you aced it, so you were positive that you’d win the bet.

“When we all go out to a restaurant and bar, the loser gets drunk.”

You have never gotten drunk before, only ever having one drink and called it a night. The most that you had felt from alcohol was feeling tipsy as you were more on the lightweight side. The idea of getting drunk for the first time with your friends around to keep you safe sounded like a good bet.

That was if you lost.

“Deal.”

Arriving at their house, you walked in to find Taeyong playing a game on the TV. He noticed you and paused the game. “Hey guys,” he greeted with his soft eyes landing on you, melting your heart a little.

“Hey hyung! What are you up to?” Ten asked, throwing himself on the couch beside him.

“Playing for a bit before going out.”

“Ooo~ Who are you seeing?” Ten wiggled his eyebrows.

“Mel.”

“That hot girl? How are you not dating her already?”

Taeyong looked at you with a knowing look and didn’t say anything. As if on cue, a notification chimed making Taeyong pick up his phone. He stood up immediately and began walking to the front door. “I’ll see you guys later.”

“Have fun hyung! Be safe!” Ten teased.

Taeyong rolled his eyes at him and shifted his gaze onto you, sending a genuine smile before turning on his heels.

Your heart fluttered at the smile he sent your way. You liked seeing this side of Taeyong a lot, soft and smiling, unlike his previous cold self. This was the result of your courageous encounter the other day and you were quite proud of yourself to have resolved the matter with him.

“Okay guys! Let’s study Korean!” Ten shouted.

“Say that in Korean, you coward,” Yuta said.

“Hangukmareul kongbuhapsida!” Ten stuck his tongue out at Yuta.

“You didn’t translate ‘Okay guys!’”

Ten searched for something inside his backpack, retrieving a pair of scissors and chased after Yuta.

- ❀ -

The next few weeks, you spent time hanging out with the boys even in Joy’s absence. You would play Mario Kart on the TV with them, smiling proudly at the end for coming first place after one of the rounds. The shocked face on Ten riled him up and promised himself to beat you in the next round.

You had been getting closer to Taeyong, feeling super comfortable around him to the point you’d occasionally hang out in his bedroom. Only hangouts, nothing else of that sort. He was full of surprises and so out of all the boys, you spent the most amount of time with him. His bedroom was super tidy and clean, numerous small plants sat on a multi-tier plant stand, candles of different scents and some colouring supplies on a dresser, a pair of headphones and laptop with a few books and a Febreze spray on the desk, and a series of Polaroid photos hanging off the strings on the wall. The vibe of his room was so serene that you wished you could live there.

How you had gone from staying away from boys to coolly laying beside one on his bed was beyond your brain’s ability to comprehend.

Sometimes Taeyong would cook a meal in the kitchen and the shocking part for you was that he’d take the time to decorate it like 5-star restaurants would.

You took a spoonful of bibimbap into your mouth. “Oh my goodness! This tastes so delicious, Tae!” The flavours bursting inside your mouth had you wiggling a happy dance.

Taeyong laughed his heart out. “I’m glad.” His heart was happily drinking up your animated self, devouring the food he prepared with all his heart. He didn’t realize he was staring at you longer than he should, not realizing that he was growing a deep tender affection for you.

- ❀ -

Your Korean teaching assistant had returned the graded quizzes at the end of class. You noticed two errors in your writing and your heart sank. “Dammit,” you cursed in your head. You were so confident in your Hangul writing that you expected a perfect score.

Ten nudged your elbow. “So Y/N, what did you get?”

“Two mistakes,” you said in a gloomy tone.

His eyes widen in excitement for beating you. “I got one! I won the bet! Yes!” He began throwing punches in the air.

“You didn’t beat me.”

“Shut up hyung! You weren’t even part of the bet.”

As much as you were excited to get drunk for the first time in your life, you were worried. After you told Joy about the bet, she told you a fair number of stories of how people acted when drunk. What if you said or did something wrong? “You all will take care of me right?”

Yuta snorted. “Is that even a question? Of course we will! Why? How is our princess when she’s drunk?” he teasingly asked you.

“Uh... I’ve never gotten drunk.”

They both looked at you as if you had grown a third head.

“No way!” Ten couldn’t believe you. “How can you not have by now? It’s something everyone would have done in high school or freshman year. Even Mark has.”

You shrugged. “I just never went out of my way to drink like that.”

Yuta looked genuinely concern. “Are you okay getting drunk? This is something no one should pressure you into as well.”

You nodded. “Yeah I am. I’m curious to know how it’s like to get drunk, and if it’s with you guys, I feel better.”

“Exactly hyung! Otherwise she shouldn’t have agreed to the bet. And wait, what do you mean as well?”

You knew Yuta was referring to your v-card but Ten not knowing had you confused. “You don’t know?”

“Know what?”

“I’m a virgin.”

“YOU’RE WHAT?” Talk about getting two shocking facts in a row.

“I thought Yuta would have told you.”

Yuta made a gesture of him zipping his lips. “I don’t go around spreading news about someone’s privacy. I’m a gentleman. Unlike someone.” He hinted at Ten.

“Hyung!”

“Now that Ten knows, everyone’s gonna know. Sorry Y/N.”

Ten crossed his arms. He knew it was true. It was hard to keep secrets in his stomach. “I’m not gonna go around campus and announce it.”

“I know. Even if it’s just inside the house, you’re still spreading it.”

After the talk with Yuta at the party, you weren’t feeling embarrassed like you used to. As long as it stayed within your friends. “It’s okay. Shouldn’t friends know anyway?”

- ❀ -

The news did spread, and thankfully only within the walls of their house. Johnny had seen it coming, Mark was baffled and didn’t know what to do with the information, and Taeyong was shocked.

You were laying on your stomach on Taeyong’s bed, reading through your notes for a course. Taeyong was sitting by his desk working on his laptop. Your mind kept going back to the virginity conversations. You’d be lying if your desires and curiosity weren’t growing inside you. Hanging out with handsome boys had made you feel things in your body that you had never experienced in your previously dull life.

Hesitancy was getting the best of you to ask something from Taeyong. You didn’t want to make your friend feel awkward with your inquiry. But you didn’t want to ask him after having some alcohol in order to have more courage. You wanted to be sober and fully alert.

“Tae?” you called to him quietly.

He stopped typing and turned to you. Seeing your worried facial expression, he grew concerned. “What’s wrong? Are you not feeling well?”

You grew restless and you shifted your body weight to sit upright. With a deep breath, you said something that you never thought you’d say in your life.

“I want to have sex.”

You caught him off guard so hard that he began choking on air. After recovering from the initial shock, he gathered his thoughts and quietly asked, “With who?”

You bit your lip and shrugged. To be honest, you didn’t have anyone in mind, but you wanted to make sure it was someone you could rely on and be gentle with you. “I wanted to ask you if you know any guy who’d be interested in my first time. Someone who’s not going to be rough and won’t make me feel uncomfortable. Do you know anyone?”

Taeyong could hear his heart cry for how innocent you looked asking him. He didn’t want to say any other guy’s name other than himself. He could tell by your face that it terrified you to end up in the wrong bed, and he knew he would take things easy to make you feel intimate and comfortable. “I do know someone.”

Smiling excitedly, you asked who.

A brief silence from Taeyong before he confidently answered. “Me.”

Your face fell. Of course, you’d be over the moon to have the benefits with your friend, but you weren’t sure if it was the best idea. A warning bell rang in your brain to not go for it, but your heart wanted to. Taeyong was fast becoming a dear friend like Joy, and the thought of Joy had you remembering her words.

Anything more than friends.

This was still within the friendship boundary, so you didn’t think it was going to be an issue.

He observed your fallen expression and began panicking. “I mean you don’t have to with me. I can say someone else’s name. I’m not trying to take advantage of-”

“Tae!”

He stopped rambling. He feared his friendship with you was going to become awkward and regretted suggesting himself to you. “I’m sorry,” he muttered, his head hanging low.

You on the other hand were slowly killing off the warning in your head and went to jump onto your heart’s desire. “No Tae. I’d like that.”

His head shot up to see if his ears heard you right. You smiled warmly, getting excited for your first time with a boy that you had been growing fond of.

As a friend.

“Are you sure?” Taeyong searched your face for any signs of discomfort and failed.

You nodded. “If it’s with you, I don’t think I’ll regret it.”

A fond smile grew on his face. “You won’t.”

After staring into each other’s eyes for a while, you had enough with the wait. “Can we right now?”

Taeyong chuckled at your eagerness. He got up from his chair and sat closer to you on the bed. He held your face in his gentle hands, admiring your innocence up close before placing his lips on yours.

- ❀ -

Ever since then, you and Taeyong had been spending even more time together. Whether it’d be in his bedroom, meeting up at random spots on campus, going out to different places for food and entertainment, and even going over to your apartment.

You’d both stay up and watch movies with Taeyong being a sucker for romance. You weren’t that being of a romance fan but only agreed to watch his reactions throughout the movie. He’d have a huge smile plastered on his face whenever the lead couple would have cute interactions, and tears rolled down whenever a heartbreaking scene occurred. He would seek comfort by clinging onto your arm and laying his head on your shoulder. Your heart did a flip every time he snuggled up to you. Sometimes he’d stay over for the night and when Joy noticed how intimate Taeyong had gotten with you, she thought it was time for her to do something.

The more and more Taeyong spent his time with you, the less and less he went out with his other female friends. He loved every second with you, craving to only be with you. Your friendship with him was at a level where he took every opportunity he could find to pat your head, hold your hand, give you kisses on the cheek, lay his head on your lap, and pull you into hugs when saying your hellos and goodbyes. You viewed all this in a friendly manner of course, for Taeyong to express his emotionally sensitive side to you, the love he had for you as a close friend. It was a total contrast to your first impression of him and you loved it.

After midterms were over, Taeyong suggested for the two of you to hang out at a café he discovered recently. You walked in, your jaw dropping in awe of the beauty that laid in front of you. The café was decorated from head to toe with various types of flowers. Every wall either had paintings or hanging flowers while baskets or vases of specific varieties sat on every table. Alongside the coffee and baked goods menu, there was a menu for all the types of flowers for purchase, whether as single flowers or bouquets.

Taeyong had brought you to a flower café and you loved it.

“Wow...” you whispered.

You shook out of your daze once you felt a gentle hand on your back, guiding you towards the counter.

After receiving your order for an iced americano and Taeyong for a strawberry cold drink, you both sat down by a table of magenta lilacs neatly organized in a white basket.

You took a sip of your bitter drink while adoring the flower basket. “They’re beautiful,” you said quietly to not disturb their beauty.

Taeyong agreed silently. Not as beautiful as you, he thought. You were always ready to give emotional support to your friends and offer your shoulder for someone to lean or cry on. But never once did you talk about yourself. He wanted to get to know you, not just on the surface but on the inside as well. “Tell me about yourself.”

You directed your eyes at the boy across you and laughed. “What is this? An interview?”

He shook his head being serious. “I only know your present.”

“And that’s all you need to know.” You didn’t like where Taeyong was going with his words.

He sighed loudly and leaned forward to take your free hand gently, drawing circles with his thumb on the back of your hand. “I care about you, Y/N.”

He didn’t just care about you. He was falling for you. But he wasn’t going to confess his love for you just yet. His trauma from adolescence years still haunted him whenever he thought about commitments.

You leaned back slightly irritated. “I know but I- I... I don’t want to talk about it,” you muttered.

You wanted to forget about your past, have the memories buried so deeply inside your brain that it’d be hard to ever retrieve them. It was why you never shared it with Joy. What was done was done, and it was only better to focus on the present. You tried to live your present without using the past as a reason. But it was exactly what you did to avoid boys.

He smiled softly in understanding. He knew better as he had done the same before you came in his life. “Okay but remember I’m always here for you.”

- ❀ -

The night finally arrived when your squad went to a restaurant and bar. This meant that you were about to fulfill the bet that you had lost to Ten. Joy had you snack a little in advance to prevent you from unfavourable effects of drinking that night.

“I can’t believe I’m going to see my cute innocent Y/N get drunk for the first time tonight!” Joy gushed, squealing and clapping her hands in excitement.

“Ten, good job for winning that bet. Though it’s a shame that I can’t see you dance on the table,” Johnny said.

Ten scoffed. “Please, I’m always ready to dance. You just have to dare me.”

“But hyung drunk and dancing is like on a whole nother level,” Mark commented.

A devilish smirk formed on Ten’s face. “Should I get drunk too?”

“Not tonight. The spotlight is supposed to be on Y/N. Plus we don’t want Ten to start stripping his clothes off in front of the ladies,” Yuta said.

Joy took a sharp intake of breath. “I want to see that.”

While the rest were debating whether or not Ten should get drunk along with you, you were beginning to feel anxious. Your legs shook under the table as stories of drunken people that Joy shared with you started haunting you. You hoped you wouldn’t do something that would make you regret it later.

Taeyong noticed your jittery disposition beside him and placed a hand on your thigh, calming you down a bit. You looked up to meet his concerned eyes. “Are you okay?”

You really were okay, especially being around friends who cared for you. You trusted them to keep you safe. “I am.” You genuinely flashed a smile, lessening his worry.

The drinks arrived for everyone, your friends going for cocktails while shots of liquor were prepared for you. Taeyong chose to not drink, volunteering to be the designated driver and making sure you were safe.

“Okay girl! It’s showtime!” Joy cheered and the rest of your friends shouted with encouragements.

After a deep breath in and out, you downed the first shot. You closed your eyes as you felt your throat burn immediately, all the anxiety leaving your body.

“Holy shit! Her neck is turning red,” Ten commented clearly amused.

After downing a few more shots consecutively, you stopped for a moment when your head was beginning to spin a little out of control, almost making you fall off your seat.

Taeyong noticed it and thought that you had enough drinks. He brought his hand closer to the remaining shots and began sliding it further from you until you stopped his hand and grabbed another shot, bottoms up.

“Y/N I think-”

“No!” You cut him off by shouting loudly. He was taken aback by your outburst, and you took this opportunity to down another shot. This time, you stood up from your seat and slammed your hands on the table. “I’ll do what I want!”

The others grew concerned, fearing that you’d drink more than your body could handle. Only Ten was having a blast watching your wasted self.

Joy decided to interfere. “Y/N, that’s enough drinks-”

Everyone was alarmed to see tears rolling down your face. You stumbled a bit backwards before regaining your stance. A few of your friends stood up on instincts to help you out, but you yelled at them. “Sit back down!”

They instantly sat back down and threw worried glances at one another, silently trying to figure out what would be the best course of action. “Y/N, are you okay?” Johnny asked you as gentle as possible, not wanting to stir you up even more.

“No!” you exclaimed before lowering your voice to a soft murmur. “No...”

Mark spoke up. “What’s wrong, noona?”

“My heart.” Thanks to the liquor, you weren’t going to stop yourself. “Why...”

“Why what, noona?”

“Why can’t I...” You grew silent again, focusing on the feeling of the alcohol running in your blood.

“What is it, Y/N?” Joy asked in a soft voice.

“Why can’t I trust my heart to fall in love?”

Taeyong and Joy took the biggest blow from your words. All this time, Joy thought you weren’t simply interested in relationships. She never knew there was a trust issue involved. Meanwhile, Taeyong felt his heart crack badly. He already had his own personal trauma to overcome for his love, and you having one as well was like trying to break through a double layered brick wall before a happy ending was possible.

You had enough with the enclosed environment and wanted to get some fresh air in your lungs. You kicked your chair back for more room, walking in a not so straight line. Your friends were about to get up again until you yelled, “No one follow me!”

They were all tensed, watching you carefully from their seats and not lose sight of you. When you left the restaurant, Joy stood up with plans to follow you. But Taeyong had beaten her and sprinted out the building, leaving Joy stunned.

Outside, Taeyong caught up to you and pulled your arm, halting your steps. He was shocked to see your crying face.

“Y/N.”

“Tae, I’m scared to fall in love.” You fell to the ground and sobbed your heart out in front of your friend.

His heart shattered into a million pieces. As much as he was dying to know what happened for you to say such a thing, he had to push his curiosity away and comfort you. He bent down to his knees and pulled you into his arms. You fully leaned into his embrace and sobbed. He held you tightly, patting your head gently and kissing the top of your head, hoping to calm you down.

“I’m scared. What if he turns out bad?”

“Shh... I’m here,” he shushed, stopping the bad thoughts from forming in your head.

“I want to fall in love... I want someone to love me,” you cried.

Taeyong hesitated. You were drunk, most likely to forget the events of the night. He wanted to confess. In any other situation, both his and your troubled pasts would have made him bit his tongue back.

But at that moment, he wished with all his heart that you would forget his words once sober.

“I’m in love with you, Y/N.”

The words were clear enough for you clinging onto him for dear life, and Joy who stood at a distance behind him.

- ❀ -

You woke up in your bed with a pounding headache. Getting out of bed really slow, you shuffled your feet in the direction of the kitchen, finding Joy by the cooktop.

“Morning!” she chirped. “Have this,” she pointed at the glass filled with cool water on the counter.

“Mmm, that smells so good,” you moaned, its delicious scent hitting your nose.

Joy smiled. “Of course it would. I’m a better cook than you,” she teased.

You didn’t have the energy to retort back and instead asked her something more important.

“What happened last night?”

Joy paused. Considering the amount of alcohol you consumed, it was no shocker that you wouldn’t remember anything. She secretly wished that you’d forget the happenings of the previous night for two things.

One: because of what you said. She wasn’t mad. She could never be with you because you were too precious for her. She thought back to when she asked you why you weren’t willing to invest yourself in boys. She trusted you that you were saying the truth when you simply weren’t into relationships. People had different outlooks on life. But there was a really small chance that made Joy think you were putting up a tough act to suppress your emotions. And she was right when the alcohol had let you speak your heart that you never did when sober.

And two: Taeyong. Joy didn’t trust him when he confessed his love for you. She didn’t know whether he ‘loved’ you like the other girls or it was a love that ran much deeper. After hearing your drunken words, if you had remembered Taeyong’s words, then you were going to feel troubled.

“Shit, did I do something bad?” you asked worriedly.

“No no. You were interesting, bossing over us,” she giggled. It was quite a contrast to see her usually quiet friend being all loud and demanding when drunk.

“Huh?”

“Don’t worry about it,” Joy laughed at your puzzled expression.

“Okay,” you chose to believe her. “But did anything else happen?” Something was eating inside you, trying to tell you that there was more to the night than what she was implying.

She shook her head, forcing a genuine smile on her face to the best of her ability. “Nothing else happened.” She felt guilty lying to you for the first time, but it was only for your best interest.

You didn’t have another choice but to accept her words. You pushed the unpleasant feeling aside and drank the prepared glass of water.

- ❀ -

When Taeyong hung out with you next time, he didn’t notice any changed behaviour from you. He formed his speculation that you did not have a recollection of your intoxicated night. He felt relieved to have the friendship not change, but it also pained him to carry his unrequited love silently.

It was a month before the exam period and you both waited in your bedroom for the exam schedule to come out any minute on your devices. You only had two finals while Taeyong had three. When the schedule appeared, you searched for your courses and went into brief shock, stunned by the great news that you had your fingers crossed for.

“Tae! Both of mine are on the first day!” You began dancing around the room full of joy.

He laughed at your happy form and searched for his courses on the list. “Awe man, mine are all near the end.”

You paused to take in his words. “Oh. So you won’t be able to come with me.”

“Come where?”

“To South Korea.”

He felt his blood run cold. “Why South Korea?”

You smiled, lost in your thoughts on the dream that was close to becoming a reality. “I wanted to go on a trip there during this winter break if I got at least three weeks of free time. I didn’t think it was actually gonna happen but now that it is, I’m so excited,” you squealed, so over the moon that you were oblivious to Taeyong’s fallen face.

“You’ll be gone for three weeks?”

You thought for a moment. “Actually, the winter term doesn’t start till the second week of January, so I’ll go for a whole month. Wow, I didn’t think this was ever gonna happen. Isn’t this so exciting Tae?” You were jumping on the spot with all sorts of ideas rushing in your mind of what you’d plan to do there. You had already made a list of things to do but with the additional time granted, you were going to perform more research and travel to other regions in the country. Travelling to South Korea in the winter was just one of the experiences you wanted before going there for the warmer season. You wanted to witness the beautiful snow covering the outskirts of the regions, see the Christmas decorations and lighting festivals, and enjoy the warm meals and beverages to battle the cold. You knew the adrenaline rush that you were feeling for your adventure wasn’t going to let you sleep that night. Or in fact many nights until the big day.

Taeyong should have been happy for you, but he felt his heart break with only one thought on continuous loop in his mind.

A month. Without you.

- ❀ -

Joy was so happy to hear your good news, knowing how much you were looking forward to this trip. But neither her nor your friends would be able to join you because of their exam schedules. This meant that it was going to be your first ever solo adventure, which made you feel both nervous and excited for.

The closer the exam period got, the more restless Taeyong’s heart became. He was so used to seeing you almost every day that it was cruel to have you ripped out of his life for a month.

You spent every day updating your trip plans to make sure you had enough free days to relax in between your full agenda. Yes, you had your finals to study for and you made sure to get your review sessions in before you treated yourself to planning.

When the day arrived for you to complete your two finals back to back, you thought you were going to die. But your papers went a lot smoother than you predicted and that added onto your happiness for the big day in less than 48 hours.

Your flight to South Korea.

- ❀ -

Your squad came to drop you off at the airport and wished you well on your big trip.

“Wow Y/N, travelling on your own requires some serious guts. I hope you have a blast,” Johnny said.

“Yeah and keep in touch whenever you get a chance,” Ten added.

“I will,” you promised with a smile.

Mark checked his watch. “It’s almost time for your flight, noona.”

You nodded. Grabbing the handle of your luggage, you were caught off guard from Yuta attacking you with a gentle hug. “Good luck princess. If you need help with anything, I know Seoul better than these boys do.”

Ten rolled his eyes. “As much as I hate to admit it, he’s right.”

“I’m always right. Even about Mark farting.”

“HYUNG!”

You giggled, “Okay.”

After Yuta let you go, Joy jumped in to give you a crushing hug. “Have lots of fun, girl. Video call me no matter what the time is, okay?”

“Okay.”

You haven’t heard the voice of one boy yet. He was silently watching you from afar as you said your goodbye to everyone. You let go of your suitcase and walked over to Taeyong. His eyes were trained on you, slightly red and puffy. You guessed his state was due to sleep deprivation for exam preparations.

You didn’t know he cried all night, not ready to face a month without you.

You encircled your arms around his neck and brought him closer to your body, resting your chin on his shoulder. “Make sure to sleep well. I’ll call you too. Eat well too. I know you’re neglecting your health right now.” You could tell he lost some weight, feeling his boney structure. Nonetheless, he still radiated the warmth you treasured from him.

Taeyong couldn’t think about eating properly or sleeping well. He was even struggling to prepare for his finals. All he wanted was to see you, touch you, be with you.

His eyes were beginning to sting and at last raised his arms to rest around your waist, pulling you closer to his chest. He was doing his very best to stop the tears from flowing down his face. This was supposed to be a very happy moment for you and he didn’t want you worrying about him.

“As much as I’d hate to split you up, Y/N is going to miss her flight if we hold her back any longer.”

Upon hearing Joy’s voice, you pulled away from him. Just as you turned away from him, you felt his hand desperately grasp yours. You turned to look back at him. “I hope you’ll be happy,” he spoke ever so softly, his words different from the plea held in his eyes.

You slid your hand out of his grasp and turned your back to him. Grabbing the handle of your suitcase, you walked in the direction of your flight’s terminal, daring yourself to not look back with the tug you felt at your heartstrings.

- ❀ -

On the road that shines exceptionally

Standing there, I am waiting for you

It’s not cold

When you are in my arms, I can feel the warmth

It had been four days. Four long days since you left. Your friends understood the first couple were spent on the flight and at the airports. But Taeyong hoped for you to have at least messaged him when you’d reach your accommodation or when having your first meal. His mind was on overdrive, thinking of all the scary possibilities that could have happened to you.

Joy was worried too but she understood that you were trying to adjust to the new environment without stressing out about too many things. The apartment felt lonely without you and she decided to spend most of her days and nights at the boys’ house, developing feelings along the way for the first tall man she met at the party.

You’re my everything

I want to protect your days and nights

You are a miracle to me, I wish you could see it

Spreading all over me, a gift called you

You’re my night and day

Waiting for you in this street, drawing you again

Another two days had passed not hearing from you. With a heavy heart, Taeyong dragged his feet to the flower café that had recently become your favourite place to relax and bloom again. Your love for flowers grew every time you stepped into the café and your sparkling eyes always made his heart flutter.

Arriving at the counter, Taeyong forced himself to order a slice of cake and a drink after thinking back at your words.

Eat well too. I know you’re neglecting your health right now.

After picking up his meal, he scanned his eyes around the interior. The table with the basket of magenta lilacs was unoccupied and he made a beeline to it. He reminisced the day he brought you to the café for the first time.

They’re beautiful. Your voice echoed in his head, referring to the lilacs.

He stared long at the clustered petals, lost in his thoughts. He had always sought for tender affection from other girls, without getting too committed to them.

You were a miracle in his life. He didn’t see you like the other girls where he only received. He wanted to give you everything. His love, attention, warmth, touch, happiness. If he could give you his happiness in replacement to taking your sadness, he’d do it. He’d do anything to make you happy.

The more he stared at the magenta lilacs, the more it became clearer. He wanted to jump on his trauma and get even closer to you.

By means of a relationship.

And at that moment, he had one person to talk to.

An unusually long day

But it’s not too bad because you’re warm

Just like that, with nothing to do

I can live just like that

Joy finally received your video call a whole week after you left. You apologized and explained that there was a baggage delay, complicating your trip temporarily without all your belongings at hand. You were so stressed of the unexpected situation that it slipped out of your mind to keep in touch with your friends. Instead, you tried to focus on surviving those days with limited essentials in your handbag and things that you purchased from the convenience store.

Taeyong heard the news from Joy during lunch with her at a diner. He was relieved that nothing terrible happened to you apart from the baggage delay. Though it did hurt him that you couldn’t think to contact him as well.

But you going through a tough time when it was supposed to be a happy trip is more painful, he thought.

“I don’t think you wanted lunch with me just to hear about Y/N.” Joy narrowed her eyes on Taeyong.

He knew Joy didn’t trust him. When he confessed his love for you, Joy had butted in, separating your sobbing mess from him. She warned him to never utter those words unless he wanted to trouble you. Taeyong understood and had assured her that it was only because you were drunk and he wanted to comfort you by speaking the truth. Ever since then, they both wished that you’d never regained memory of that night.

He took a deep breath in, composing himself for the intention of the meeting. “I don’t want Y/N to be unhappy.”

Joy sighed. “Are you emotionally blackmailing me?”

He shook his head, feeling a thorn prick at his heart. He knew it wasn’t going to be easy getting Joy’s permission. “No I’m not.”

“What makes you think I can trust you and not have you hurt her?”

Silence.

Saying that he loved you wasn’t a satisfying reason for Joy. She needed Taeyong to prove it to her that he wasn’t going to hurt you. After a long debate in his head, he decided to tell her the truth. “I run away at the thought of commitments in the name of love. Because of my parents’ divorce.”

The news threw Joy off. Then why are you after my Y/N, she thought.

“Y/N knows everything and asked to be friends with me for real and not like with the other girls. We spent a lot of hanging out, both outside and inside the house. We’d hang out in the living room, the kitchen when I’d cook for us, in my bedroom. We spent so much time together that I didn’t know I started falling for her,” he admitted.

Taeyong was met with her silence as she collected her thoughts, making one thing stand out to her. “Did you have sex with her?”

His eyes enlarged from the unexpected inquiry. “Yes.”

Joy raised an eyebrow, questioning if his feelings really were real for you. “The confession happened after you two had sex?”

“Ye-” He realized his mistake without thinking beforehand and began panicking. “No! It’s not what you think. Please!”

She laughed bitterly at him. “You had sex with her and you claim that you’re in love because it was probably the best sex of your life. Your past is sad Taeyong. You have problems and I feel bad for you. I really do. But don’t drag Y/N into your mess.” Joy was ready to leave and be done with the conversation until she heard his next words.

“You’re wrong. It’s not because of sex.”

She chuckled darkly. “Oh really? Please enlighten me,” she said, flashing a fake smile at him and crossed her arms.

He gulped. He was close to drawing the last straw that would make Joy turn her back on him and never give him another chance. “The sex did bring us even closer together. We became more intimate with each other. But even then I was still scared to confess to her because my fear was still there.”

Joy wanted to believe Taeyong. Without forming much biased thoughts, she continued listening.

“After Y/N left for her trip, I lost all appetite to eat. I can’t sleep at night with my heart longing for her. I’m trying to focus on my final preps but I can’t stop thinking about her. I even stopped talking to other girls because I only love her. I got myself to eat only after reminding myself that Y/N wanted me to eat well. And that was especially at the café Y/N loved to go.”

It was at this moment when Joy started to believe his feelings for you.

“What if... what if I tried to get myself to cope with my trauma so that I can be in a relationship with her instead of forever living my life in fear? I know that Y/N has a trust issue that I don’t know about. But what if I can help her get over her fear too? What if my efforts to bring us together officially can make her finally... happy?”

No noise was heard from Joy. Her brain was raking through all the mentioned possibilities. If Taeyong could break through the walls of your heart, the fruitful outcome would be an epitome of love.

“Okay Taeyong. You have my support, but I won’t forgive you if you hurt her.”

It seemed to be nevеr-ending

At the end of thе long wait

You’re the one

One month had passed, meaning it was time for your friends to pick you up at the airport’s arrival department. Taeyong could feel his heart beating erratically when it was time for the passengers from your flight to collect their baggages and exit. When his eyes found you, he didn’t prepare his heart for an unexpected shock.

You walked out, searching for your friends with your suitcase at hand. You spotted them, waving eagerly, and walked over to them. But you weren’t alone. Beside you was a young handsome man that almost made Joy swoon if it wasn’t for her feelings for another man. More than the boy having breathtaking looks, she was shocked to see you interact with him.

“Woah... is that guy...” Mark trailed off, unbelieving his sight.

You, a girl who had never befriended a guy on your own, were talking to one in close proximity.

“Wow, he’s so hot.” Ten practically had heart eyes.

“He is,” Johnny agreed.

Yuta loved to brag about his handsome looks but he was stunned by the stranger beside you. “Yeah, and Y/N that close to him means there’s something going on between them.”

Taeyong didn’t want to agree with the others but they were right. The stranger was very handsome, and there could be something going on. That latter thought made his heart break. After what felt like a never-ending wait for you to come back, he was excited to take things slow with you and win your trust for a relationship. However, all his plans had jumped out the window and he felt his eyes sting.

Especially when you linked your arm with the fair-skinned boy.

“Welcome back girl!” Joy attacked you for a bear hug when you neared them.

You laughed hugging her back. You greeted everyone, leaving the boy you had been dying to see again for last. You faced Taeyong and hugged him like you did before your departure. “Hi Tae. I hope you’re doing well,” you whispered in his ear, rubbing his back in a soothing manner.

He closed his eyes in efforts to keep his tears at bay and returned the hug, muttering a soft hello.

You pulled back, smiling at him before grabbing the arm of your new friend for introduction. “Guys, this is Jaehyun. I met him during the trip and he’s here for the study abroad program at our university this term.”

You introduced Jaehyun to everyone one by one. When Jaehyun was officially introduced to Taeyong, he noticed Taeyong fidget with his fingers tensely and a small smirk formed on Jaehyun’s face.

“We can drop you off Jaehyun. Where are you living?” Johnny asked.

Jaehyun hadn’t found an off-campus accommodation yet, thanks to the fact that it was the middle of the middle of the school year. He didn’t want to be stuck in the dorms on campus and his initial plan was to stay at a hotel as he had the money for that.

But why hotel when he could live with you?

“I was gonna ask Joy if it’s okay for Jaehyun to stay at our place until he finds one. I’ll give my room to him and sleep with you,” you suggested to her.

“Oh yeah that’s great with me! I get to cuddle with my Y/N,” Joy giggled.

Taeyong didn’t like the idea one bit. “Why should a guy live with the girls?”

Johnny agreed with him. “You’re right. Jaehyun live with us. And I mean for the term.”

A pang at Taeyong’s heart. He was not looking forward to seeing Jaehyun’s face every day. But it’s better than him being close to Y/N, he thought.

“But hyung, we don’t have a spare room,” Mark said.

“You’re shifting to Yuta’s room. He has a bigger bed.”

“Wow great idea! Mark can be my cuddle buddy!”

Mark groaned at the thought of Yuta clinging to him all night.

- ❀ -

“You what?” Joy couldn’t believe what she was hearing from you.

“I remember that night.”

The boys dropped you and Joy off at your apartment before heading for their house. You dragged Joy to the couch and told her the news.

You weren’t mad at Joy. In fact you were thankful. If you had known before your trip, you would have felt awkward to see Taeyong and avoided him, which would have made you sad. You loved and always looked forward to spending time with him. And so after remembering the words you blurted out that night, you understood Joy jumped in to protect you from getting hurt.

You felt blessed to have a friend like Joy.

“Thank you Joy,” you smiled genuinely at her.

She was relieved that you weren’t mad at her. “When did you remember?”

“Right before I met Jaehyun. And he knows.”

“He knows?”

“I told him about Taeyong.”

During your trip, you couldn’t stop thinking about Taeyong, especially after your regained memory. You were so confused as to whether you should be happy or not that you decided to not contact him altogether. Though the more you ignored him, the more the tightness in your chest grew. Jaehyun noticed your behaviour and asked you what was wrong. For some reason, you trusted Jaehyun in your secrets and told him everything about you and Taeyong.

She lifted her hand to stop you from talking further. “Okay hold up. How are you so chill around Jaehyun?”

Yes, that was a question that you had asked yourself when you had acquainted him upon first meeting. “He helped me get through my tough time there and it was just a coincidence that he was going to be coming here for the term. I guess thanks to you, I was more comfortable becoming friends with him. Plus, brownie points for being handsome,” you joked.

Joy felt her heart blossom for her close friend to finally interact with a boy without her help this time. “Wow Y/N, I never thought I’d see this day come.”

“Me neither.”

A question lingered inside her. “What now with Taeyong? Are you going to feel awkward with him?” Joy wasn’t necessarily worried for Taeyong because her priority was you.

The trip bought you time to think about what you were going to do with his confession floating around your heart. Over the course of your trip, your heart slowly accepted your feelings for him. It was all thanks to your time apart from him to realize how much you missed him and loved him. You craved for Taeyong’s warmth, both physically and emotionally, and that was enough for you to stop running away from your true feelings and give Taeyong a chance. You still remembered Taeyong’s trauma and you guessed it was the reason why he only confessed to you when drunk, so that you would forget about it and move on like nothing happened.

“No I won’t be awkward with him. I love him too Joy.”

She gaped at you. “Seriously? Like in love with him?”

You nodded. “Yes, I’m in love with him.”

Her eyes became wet with tears almost spilling out. This was the best news she had heard from you till this date. You... in love. “Y/N do you have any idea how that makes me feel? After all this time I’ve been worried about you. After that night you got drunk... and I just... it hurt that you were...”

You laughed quietly. “You’re literally the bestest friend I’ve ever had. Seriously Joy, if I had said this to someone else, they would be so happy. And then there’s you, crying,” you teased.

She wiped her tears with the back of her hand. “Well as much as I missed you, something good happened while you were gone.”

She told you of her talk with Taeyong, telling you how much of an effect your absence had on him. Your heart bloomed when you heard that he missed you a lot and had listened to you to eat his meals, even going to your favourite café because he missed you so much.

“Then it’s final. Once I find the right time, I’m going to ask him out.”

- ❀ -

“Why can’t Ten move to your room? Your bed is bigger too!”

“Joy stays over in my room sometimes. I’m not having a threesome with Ten,” Johnny stated with a serious face.

Mark scowled, not liking the idea of Yuta clinging to him and kissing his cheeks at every opportunity he could find.

“Hurry off now. Don’t leave our new housemate waiting in the living room all day. Go clean up and shift to Yuta’s room.”

With a grumble, he stomped his way to fulfill his older brother’s command.

Well at least there was one other person in the house who didn’t like the idea of Jaehyun living there.

While waiting for Mark to empty his room out, the rest of the boys sat on the couches to get to know their new housemate with Taeyong sitting the furthest away.

“So Jaehyun, do you get girls falling for your looks?” Ten excitedly asked, finally getting the chance to ask him that.

Why was that the first thing he got asked out of everything? But it really was a big question. “Yes, and not just girls but guys too. Too many to count.” Back in high school, he’d receive gifts on his desk in the form of food from his secret admirers, usually his favourite bread and milk. He would also have the exterior of his locker be taped with numerous heart shaped notes.

“Wow...” Yuta breathed out. “It kind of sounds like Taeyong but with his girl friends.”

Taeyong didn’t want the wrong impression from the boys and so he revealed the news. “I cut ties with them.”

The air stilled in the living room, with Johnny being the first one to cut it. “What do you mean cut ties?”

“I don’t talk to them anymore.”

“All of them?”

“Yes.”

Ever since he realized his feelings for you, he deleted all the numbers of the girls in his contacts. He lost interest with all of them when he only craved for your tender affection. For your love. He didn’t know what was up between you and Jaehyun, and while that made him jealous, he wasn’t going to go back to his old ‘friends’ because of that.

“Woah... but why?” Yuta asked.

Taeyong eyed Jaehyun, shooting him a glare. He wasn’t going to say your name out loud in front of him. What if Jaehyun’s plan wasn’t only to study there? What if he had something up his sleeve? What if he was going to win your heart?

Jaehyun noticed Taeyong’s hard gaze on him and smirked.

To answer his friend’s question, Taeyong merely said, “Because of someone.”

- ❀ -

The winter term began and much to your delight, you had a class with Jaehyun. You both would have an hour to spare before that class and so you became his personal tour guide as you showed him around your campus, pointing at the different buildings and mentioning the services he could find there. Along the way, you noticed a few students stop in their tracks to look in Jaehyun’s way, their jaws dropping.

When the two of you walked into your almost full class, numerous eyes widened in shock, more jaws dropped, and hushed whispers were heard when laying their eyes on the boy beside you. Some of them had looks of jealously on their faces for you having the privilege to stand beside such a divine being. If your eyes weren’t playing a trick on you, you thought you saw a girl’s head spin almost as if she was going to faint from the unbelievable beauty of the young man. Talk about having a face of a first love.

When you first met Jaehyun, yes you did think he was very handsome. But that was all. No big reactions like your classmates in front of you had.

Why didn’t you crumble like the others?

Because of Taeyong.

Taeyong on the other hand grew restless with the amount of time you spent with Jaehyun. The influx of messages on his phone from unsaved numbers were mostly talks of the newest heartthrob on campus. He knew they were from the girls he had stopped talking to, and he couldn’t care less of the ones texting him that they missed him.

His main concern was if you were going to fall in love with Jaehyun.

The night of the term’s first grand party arrived and your whole squad, now including Jaehyun, attended. A permanent scowl was fixed on Taeyong the entire time as he witnessed Jaehyun being super close to you. A few of his old friends came up to him, asking how he was doing and if he wanted anything, but he simply ignored them. Taeyong glanced at the rest of the crowd around Jaehyun and he had to admit that the messages on his phone were true. Having enough of the stabbing pain in his chest, he downed the alcohol in his hand.

The next night of the weekend meant another party. The boys were getting themselves ready to leave the house once you’d arrive. Joy had to go back to her hometown for a personal matter and you insisted to meet them at their house instead of them coming to pick you up.

Because you had a different plan for that night.

“Noona! Are you ready for tonight?” Mark greeted you when you arrived at the house. Taeyong was sitting on the couch, silently watching you.

“Umm, well I’m not going to the party.”

“What? Why wouldn’t you come princess?” Yuta asked.

Jaehyun answered on your behalf. “She’s going to show me around uptown. I want to see other things than just parties.”

Johnny nodded. “Yes there are other things to see here. Should we come along with you guys?”

Taeyong’s heart inflated, hoping you’d say yes.

“No, we’ll be fine.”

His heart deflated.

Yuta whistled. “Wow sounds like a date to me,” he smirked.

His heart stung.

You laughed. “No, we’re just hanging out,” you clarified.

Hearing that somewhat eased Taeyong’s heart but it wasn’t enough to calm it down. “I’m coming,” he announced.

Everyone turned their heads at Taeyong. His friends were surprised. Jaehyun wasn’t afraid to let a smirk spill onto his face, and you were trying your hardest to hold back your amused smile.

This was what you were hoping.

You knew you hung out with Jaehyun a lot and if Taeyong really was in love with you, he would have been extremely jealous. You weren’t intentionally avoiding Taeyong. With your new friend who was new around here, you wanted to help Jaehyun out as much as you could to make his temporary stay as smooth as possible and that resulted in you not spending time with Taeyong. The Taeyong you craved to have quality time with.

And you were going to make it up to him soon.

The three of you walked over to Taeyong’s car, with Taeyong running off to open the passenger door for you. He wanted you to sit beside him while he drove. You giggled at his puppy look, his desperate attempt to win your heart a little. He didn’t know he had your entire heart.

Right before you got inside the car, you gave Taeyong a quick peck on the cheek, causing a blush to spread over his cheeks under the moonlight. It had been a while since you two shared some intimate moments. And though it was merely a peck, fire had ignited throughout Taeyong’s soul.

Jaehyun silently witnessed the short intimacy between you and Taeyong and hopped into the back seat with dimples on his face.

The streetlights and shops in uptown were decked with winter decorations. It was a shame you missed the Christmas decorations as you loved seeing the streets be ornamented for the holy season. But then Christmas in South Korea was a thrilling experience and you were glad to have experienced it with Jaehyun as your guide.

The three of you walked along the illuminated road. Many of the shops were lit up from the inside indicating that they were open for business. The flower café sat a few shops down from where you three stood.

“Should we go to the flower café first?” you suggested. The chilly winter night had your body craving for a hot caramel drink.

Taeyong was in a bind. He didn’t want to say no to your suggestion, knowing how much you loved to go there. But he didn’t want Jaehyun to learn about it. It was supposed to be your and his sanctuary.

“That sounds cool,” Jaehyun said.

“It is! I love that place so much! Let’s go Tae!” you clung onto Taeyong’s arm to get a vocal approval from him.

Taeyong’s heart somersaulted at your touch and pleading eyes. He accepted his defeat and nodded, letting you drag him to the establishment.

“Okay guys, this is my treat,” you said taking your card out.

Taeyong stopped your hand. “No I’ll pay.”

“No Tae, I suggested this place.”

“I’m not letting you pay on my watch.”

In the midst of you and Taeyong arguing who should pay, Jaehyun slid a $20 bill to the cashier, giving them a look that he was paying for the collective order. “I’m paying guys,” he leaned against the counter smiling.

You pouted. “Jae why? You’re new here. I should be treating you,” you whined.

Taeyong’s heart was going to break a record at this rate with the number of times his heart shattered ever since you came back, which hadn’t even been two full weeks. It was the first time he heard you call Jaehyun in short form. The only other person you did that to was him. Not even with Johnny did you do that and his real name was John.

When you began your search for an empty table, you were a little disappointed to see the table with lilacs taken. In turn, an empty table with a small clear vase holding creamy white gardenias was spotted.

“Wow those flowers are pretty. Let’s sit there,” you said and pulled Taeyong along with you. Even though he was a little, scratch that, very insecure that you hung out with Jaehyun a lot and called him in short form, his heart soared at your unexpected touches that night. After being so deprived of you, every single attention he received from you was enough to set his heart alight.

Jaehyun watched from afar, your complete attention on the boy you loved while Taeyong’s cheeks were kissed with a rosy hue. With a smile, he took a sip of his banana milk and followed you.

- ❀ -

“Bad news!” Joy yelled with a crying face.

She furiously knocked on the door panting. Johnny frantically opened and ushered her inside, trying to calm her down as she continued crying. “What is it?” Johnny asked softly.

The rest of the boys gathered shortly, not getting too close so that she could get some air.

“Y/N’s missing.”

Taeyong’s eyes went wide as his heart dropped to the floor. Ever since the hangout with Jaehyun, you went back to normal of not talking to him. “What do you mean missing?” Taeyong asked.

She shook her head. “I don’t know where she is. I haven’t seen her all day today and she hasn’t been answering my calls or texts.”

It was almost midnight and for you to not have replied back to Joy for a whole day meant something really was wrong.

“Calm down Joy. Have you checked some places Y/N would go to often?” Yuta questioned.

She nodded. “Yeah I did. She’s nowhere.” And Joy began choking on her sobs.

Taeyong didn’t waste another second and ran up to his room, grabbing his keys and jacket. Running back down, he said, “I’m going to go look for her.”

“I’m coming with you hyung,” Mark said.

Joy gave Jaehyun a look, making Jaehyun speak up. “Mark you have a test tomorrow don’t you? You should stay back.”

“What no! I wanna search for noona too!”

“Yeah I agree with Jaehyun. I’ll stay back with Mark so he can sleep while I wait to see if Y/N comes here,” Yuta suggested.

“Yeah I’ll go with Taeyong. And Johnny and Ten can go in another car and cover another area,” Jaehyun suggested.

“Okay sounds like a plan with me,” Ten agreed.

Johnny nodded. “Joy you should stay here and calm down.”

“You think I can calm down by sitting around? I’m coming with you!” she yelled.

Taeyong didn’t like the idea of Jaehyun coming with him. He’d rather search for you alone. But finding you was more important than who his search buddy was.

It was pin drop silent in Taeyong’s car. Jaehyun knew Taeyong wasn’t a big fan of him and found it quite amusing. He was not a single ounce of threat between you and Taeyong.

Taeyong decided to keep his mouth shut, not interested to have small talk with the boy beside him as he drove down the street to where your favourite café sat. He hoped so bad that you’d be there. From the corner of his eyes, he noticed Jaehyun typing something on his phone.

Pulling up to the dimmed lighting of the café, Taeyong was dejected to see the closed sign on the window. You wouldn’t be inside a closed building.

However, Jaehyun unbuckled his seat belt and opened his door.

“Where are you going?” Taeyong asked him puzzled. There were barely any shops along the street that were open considering it was past midnight of a weekday.

“I texted the others to pick me up from here. You’ll find Y/N at the conservation park.” With that Jaehyun left the car and shut the door behind him.

Taeyong was overwhelmed with shock and relief that you weren’t exactly missing. But he was so confused with what all the commotion was about earlier. He pulled down the window. “What’s going on? Why would she do that?” Why would you be in the midst of wildlife, with trails pathed through the forests at night?

Jaehyun held his hands up. “I can’t say anything more. This is Y/N’s order. Now hurry. You don’t want her waiting for you, do you?”

Taeyong didn’t need to be told twice and he pressed on the accelerator of his car, his heart racing along.

When he got closer to the entrance of the conservation area, he was in a dilemma. It was dark with no artificial lights and if it weren’t for the bright moonlight, he wouldn’t know where to drive.

Why would you be here all alone? Who knew what could happen at night here? Wild animal attack? Serial killer on a hunt? He grew super nervous if he was going to find you in time before something bad would happen to you. He stopped the car and thought about calling you.

Only to realize that he didn’t bring his phone.

Fuck.

He cursed himself that he didn’t ask Jaehyun for pointers and he was going to try his very best to find you.

Staying inside his vehicle wasn’t helping with the limited view. He stepped out and tried to focus his eyes onto something that could aid him to get closer to you.

Glow in the dark stickers were stuck on a map in the parking lot. Taeyong thought it was bizarre for the map to have such stickers and his heart leaped, hoping it was your doing.

He parked his car and observed the map, scrutinizing to make out the colours and paths on the board. He found a sticker with TY initials on it, the spot not too far from where he stood. Taeyong knew it was you.

Sprinting towards the marked spot, he noticed a bit of light spilling from the trees that were blocking his view from you. When he walked through them, he abruptly came to a stop and lost his breath.

In front of him stood you, happily smiling that Taeyong had found you on his own. Your hands were clasping something behind your back but he didn’t pay any mind to that at that moment. Instead his eyes were glued to the setting behind you.

Red, pink and white heart shaped balloons were tied to the trees along with some outdoor hanging string lights to illuminate the small area. Letter balloons were tied to the weights and spelled out ‘I LOVE YOU’ as they floated in the air behind a white clothed table. Baskets of different types of flowers sat on the table. He recognized that all of the flowers were those that you and Taeyong had sat by at the flower café. Roses, gardenias, tulips, hyacinths, lilies, and lastly lilacs. Surrounded by the baskets, in the middle of the table sat a medium-sized white teddy bear holding a red heart.

Taeyong’s eyes lingered on the flower varieties and the words ‘I LOVE YOU’ for a while before shifting his gaze back on you.

“Y/N...” His voice failed him from the shock.

You brought your hands in front of you, a red velvety box sitting on the palms of your hands. “Are you just going to stand there?” you teased.

He shook himself, knocking some sense to his feet and walked closer to you. “What’s- Why- all this...” Taeyong’s throat was closing on him. He couldn’t believe all that he was seeing.

You giggled. “What else do you think silly?” You attempted to lighten up the situation when he looked like he was going to bawl his eyes out. You stopped laughing at his lack of response and turned serious.

“I’m in love with you Tae.” You opened up the velvet box displaying the couple rings you purchased. “I got this for us.”

Emotions poured out of his system and he gently grabbed onto your arm, pulling you into his tight embrace. His chin rested on the top of your head and you felt his chest rumble as your ear was pressed to his pounding heart. It felt like the world stopped spinning, you in his arms, his tears speeding down his face and falling on your hair that you didn’t mind the slightest bit. What mattered was the warmth that Taeyong emitted.

If you could spend an eternity in Taeyong’s arms, you would.

- ❀ -

You and Taeyong were on your way back to his house after packing everything in his car. He hadn’t let go of your hand ever since he pulled away from the hug, even when driving with his one hand. You joked that he had to at least let you go for you to sit in the passenger seat unless he wanted you to sit on his lap. And while he loved that idea, your safety came first.

“I can’t believe you remembered Y/N.” He was relieved to hear that you remembered his first confession now that the feeling was mutual. “And how did you even wait for me all alone? Weren’t you scared?”

“I wasn’t scared. But my heart was going crazy for you to find me. Joy was with me first and when we were done setting everything up, she almost like teleported to your place.”

“Wow... so that was all Joy acting. She’s such a great actress.”

You laughed. “Yup.”

A small frown appeared on his face. “Jaehyun knew too.”

“Yeah why?”

He grew silent, opting to not voice his concern and instead gave your hand a gentle squeeze.

“You’re jealous of Jaehyun, aren’t you?” you narrowed your eyes on him while his eyes were glued on the road.

Taeyong contemplated before nodding slightly.

You brought your other hand to lay on top of his. “You have nothing to be jealous about. We literally have like a sibling bond. He helped me get through so much in South Korea. I only wanted to do the same while he’s here for the study abroad program.”

His heart stilled. “Did you just say sibling?”

“Yes Tae. He’s like a brother figure to me.”

“But wouldn’t he...”

“What? Like me in that way? Of course not. He may have a pretty face of a heart stealer but he’s super loyal when it comes to friendships. He would never do anything bad to ruin relationships. In fact, he loves playing cupid because his birthday falls on Valentine’s day. That’s why he was a part of my plan tonight. He wanted us to be official so bad after hearing me talk so much about you.”

Taeyong felt a million weights lifted off his soul. Now that he heard about Jaehyun’s true personality, he felt bad for thinking Jaehyun was the devil. He was grateful that Jaehyun wasn’t the bad guy who was going to steal you away from him.

“You talked about me?” he asked flustered that you would mention him in your conversations with Jaehyun.

“Of course I would. I love you so much, like seriously crazy, Tae,” you said with a wide grin.

His heart was ready to rocket into space. He lifted your hand to his lips, placing a kiss on your palm. “I really love you too, Y/N.”

- ❀ -

You and Taeyong walked into the house, hands interlocked and being welcomed by all your friends for your safe return.

“You had us worried Y/N!” Yuta began. “What happened?”

“Yeah Joy and Jaehyun said it’s a surprise. What’s the surprise?” Ten asked with his face scrunched up.

You gave Taeyong a glance and held the intertwined hands up, showing the crew the couple rings. “We’re dating.”

Joy and Jaehyun had seen it coming and a huge smile was plastered on their faces. Meanwhile shocked expressions were registered on Johnny’s, Ten’s and Yuta’s faces. Johnny was the most surprised, followed by Yuta gaping. Ten was very amused that his friend stopped talking to other girls because of you. “Wow hyung, congrats! And you too Y/N!” The rest of your friends sent their warm regards to you and Taeyong.

“Wait till Mark hears this tomorrow morning,” Yuta said. “He’ll be thinking about it all day.”

“Watch him accidentally write it on his test,” Johnny laughed.

- ❀ -

If you were over the moon when you first thought about your trip to South Korea, you couldn’t even put into words of how you felt with Taeyong. You looked forward to seeing him, getting all giddy by his texts. He’d come to wait outside your classes, giving you a peck on the cheek as you ran into his arms. He’d give you back hugs when you would be trying to search for a book on the shelf in the library, resting his chin on your shoulder and kissing your neck. You pretty much lived at the boys’ house now more than you did before, specifically his bedroom, because you couldn’t separate yourself from him. Why should you even? Taeyong was your boyfriend. And he wanted the same thing. So what if his bed was twin sized? It was the perfect size for lovebirds like you two. He loved holding you in his arms and placing petal-like kisses on the top of your head during cuddle sessions. Every touch of his love sent your entire body blazing and you wished it’d never come to an end.

You hung out less with Jaehyun and you felt bad about it. In turn, your other friends hung out with him, especially Johnny taking him out for coffee runs. Joy did feel a bit jealous with Johnny’s new mate and could relate to how Taeyong felt with you and Jaehyun.

The month of midterms was coming up. You were looking forward to a particular boy’s special day that was going to give everyone a relief from the stress of assignments and examinations. Johnny, Joy and Ten took up the mission to organize a grand party for Jaehyun, with Johnny vowing to plan the best birthday and Valentine’s party for a student on an abroad program.

Your squad, minus Jaehyun who was meeting with an academic advisor, headed inside the library and searched for empty seats for the seven of you.

“Over there guys!” Mark spoke a bit too loudly for the librarian’s liking, earning a shush.

Ten snickered. “Mark seriously? Weren’t you supposed to be the goody two shoes?”

“Give him a break Ten. He got a little too excited seeing a huge empty table for the first time,” Yuta commented.

The poor young boy only groaned in response, wishing he could murder his hyungs in their sleep.

Johnny led the way, placing his bag on the opposite side of where you and Taeyong sat down shortly. Joy and Ten joined him as the trio were going to study for the second part of the math course. Mark had beaten Yuta to take the empty seat beside you, with the older one taking a seat at the end of the table.

“Okay guys. Do you have any idea how this integral shit works?” Johnny asked.

“Oh hyung I know!” Mark beamed at the topic mentioned. “Can I help?”

“No. Like our prof said. We should figure it out ourselves ‘cause no one’s gonna help us during the exams,” Ten recited.

“Yeah okay so what’s the first step to solve this shitshow?” Johnny pointed at the complicated question that their professor provided in class.

“Guys my head hurts,” Joy complained.

“It’s okay Joy. We got this. I’m going to find an integral calculator on Google.” Johnny pulled up his laptop and began clicking away.

“Okay hyung. I’ll see if this lazy man just stole it from the textbook. If he did, we’ll easily find the solutions online.”

“I don’t get why you can’t just ask me for help if you’re just gonna look up the answers,” Mark grumbled but the trio only ignored him.

Yuta heard Mark. “Awe does my baby tiger want to help?”

Mark stayed silent, afraid of where Yuta was going with this.

“Under the table-”

“HYUNG!”

The librarian grew furious and sent a glare at Mark, holding up a yellow card that had Yuta laughing hard. Mark took this chance to shove the older one off his seat, causing Yuta to fall flat on his butt.

Taeyong was searching for a book in his bag, his shoulders sinking at the thought that he forgot it in his bedroom. “Love, I’ll be back. I’m going to look for the book I need to write this paper on.”

You sent him a smile. “Okay.”

He smiled at you and got up from his seat, beginning his quest for the novel.

Taeyong hadn’t walked too far until he bumped into a girl, realizing who it was after a few seconds.

“Oh sorry Bella.”

She smiled. “That’s alright. I haven’t heard from you in a while.” Bella was a friend who gave him the love he needed months ago before he started loving you.

“Yeah.” He didn’t know what else to say to her, not interested in small talks.

“I missed you,” she spoke ever so softly.

He didn’t miss her because he had made it clear to everyone what his intentions were ahead of time.

“I need to talk to you,” Bella said and grabbed his hand, not giving Taeyong a chance to refuse and pulled him through the tall bookshelves, going deeper and deeper until it was impossible to find them within seconds.

You had seen the encounter from your seat. Taeyong talking to an unknown girl didn’t bother you. But the second that girl pulled Taeyong out of your sight, something didn’t quite sit well in your stomach. You wanted to go after them and see what it was about. Everyone at your table was occupied, the trio still scratching their heads at the math problem, and Yuta messing around with Mark.

You stood up and headed in the direction of where the duo disappeared, stunned that you didn’t see them immediately behind the bookshelves.

Where did you go Taeyong?

You walked around, turning your head in all directions at every opening until you bumped into a tall boy.

Lucas.

You recognized the boy in one of your classes. He was always loud, disturbing nearby classmates who were trying to focus on the lecture content. Quite a flirt towards girls as well, excluding you thankfully. You always ignored him and he did the same in a respectful manner, even when the two of you ended up sitting beside one another.

You muttered an apology and tried to walk around him, but he blocked your way.

That was a first. He had never bothered you before. You let out a deep breath, pushing the task of finding Taeyong aside for the moment. “What is it?”

- ❀ -

“You should believe me Taeyong. I only want the best for you.”

Taeyong couldn’t believe her. “No Bella, Y/N would never do that to me. And it’s better if you leave my sight now before I raise my voice at you.”

She shook her head not backing down. “I won’t. What makes you think Y/N will stay loyal to you? She’s never looked another guy before you.”

“Exactly my point. Y/N wouldn’t ever betray me.”

“No Tae. Now that she gave you a chance, she’ll be more comfortable looking at other guys. Maybe even behind your back. Don’t you think that can happen?”

Her words stirred something inside him, thinking about Jaehyun. Yes, he knew Jaehyun wasn’t a threat but the thought of how you made friends with him abroad without telling anyone had him momentarily think that you could possibly-

Taeyong shook his head, trying to shake Bella’s words out of his mind. “You’re just trying to make me doubt her, aren’t you? I’m not gonna-” he stopped suddenly biting his tongue. It was better to just leave instead of fighting with a wall. He turned his back on her to leave before she could brainwash him more.

But Bella wasn’t done with him just yet. She grabbed his shoulder forcefully turning him around and placed her lips on top of his in a blink. When Taeyong realized what Bella was doing, he pushed her away, not even in the gentlest manner and looked at her incredulously. “What the fuck Bella?!” He turned not glancing back at her and failed to notice the sinister smile on her face.

It didn’t feel like a good day for him to write his paper. He just wanted to take you home and cuddle with you all day.

He walked through the endless bookcases, attempting to figure out where on earth he was. Bella had caught him off guard when she dragged him away that he couldn’t think about anything else other than what the girl wanted to discuss with him. When Taeyong passed by one of the passageways without much thought, he froze in his steps, his heart getting caught in his throat. Backing up slowly, he looked at a guy. Super close to you. He couldn’t see your face clearly as your hair blocked your side profile.

Your back was pressed flat against the bookshelf as Lucas caged you in his arms. You threatened him to leave you alone but he only laughed at your face. You were afraid of him because he was really tall, and his smirk made him look a lot more intimidating. If you tried to get physical on him, you were terrified what he’d do in return. You frantically looked around to see if anyone was nearby to cry for help. Your heart leaped to see Taeyong but then it did a free fall when your eyes lingered on his face.

A bright red lipstick stain on his lips.

You never wore lipstick and you knew it had something to do with that girl from earlier.

Taeyong stormed his way towards you two, briefly glancing at Lucas in disgust, and when his eyes landed on you, you felt all the colour drain from your face.

“What are you doing with him?” Taeyong asked and at that moment you didn’t know if you were more afraid of Lucas...

Or Taeyong’s furious eyes.

You were speechless. First, he went off to kiss a girl behind your back. And second, instead of saving you, he turned the entire situation on you. You never thought Taeyong would ever doubt you for cheating behind his back, and you never thought he would cheat on you.

Lucas took this chance to kiss your cheek. You were startled by his bold move and pushed him off with all the anger you had for both him and your boyfriend. “What the fuck Lucas?! And you,” turning to Taeyong, “Why the fuck is there lipstick on your lips?”

Taeyong laughed bitterly with his breaking heart, not caring about the lipstick stain and was amused by you dodging his question. “I asked first. You literally avoided answering me when you-”

“Because you’re turning this all on me after you smooched off that girl!” You face was red, beyond furious at the accusation. “Don’t you dare talk to me!” you yelled, not caring that you were in a library. Without giving Taeyong a chance to retort back, you turned on your heel and hurriedly jogged back to the table with hot tears descending down your face.

You wiped the tears off with the back of your hands angrily and began throwing your stuff in your bag carelessly. Your three friends looked at you in alarm to see your crying face. You didn’t care where your other two friends were. All you wanted to do was get away from everyone, especially him.

“Y/N? What-”

Before Joy could ask, you ran out the library.

Joy quickly packed her belongings. “I’m gonna go,” she informed and rushed after you.

Johnny and Ten looked at one another in worry and later saw Taeyong walk back to the table with a scowl. He had already wiped the lipstick off his face.

“What happened Taeyong?” Johnny asked.

“Nothing,” he tried to brush it off, not in the mood to talk about it.

“It was definitely something!” Johnny’s voice boomed with such resonance that it made the librarian draw the last straw and kicked the boys out.

That wasn’t even a problem when they had a bigger problem at hand.

On the way down the steps of the library, Yuta and Mark had caught up to them, asking what happened that made everyone leave the library suddenly. Taeyong hadn’t said a word yet, the scowl permanent on his face.

Johnny wasn’t content with the silence. “I’m not letting you into the house if you don’t speak up, young man.”

Right at that time, Lucas exited the library, passing by the boys casually. Taeyong noticed him and saw Lucas shoot him an evil smirk, shaking his head in disappointment and left.

Dropping his scowl, Taeyong lifted his arm to stare long at the smudged lipstick on the back of the hand.

His heart stung badly, the feeling of regret slowly creeping into his heart.

- ❀ -

You had gotten back to your apartment with Joy hot on your trails. You threw your bag angrily on the couch and walked to your bedroom, slamming the door shut on Joy. You wanted to be alone when crying. Crying for the boy that you thought wouldn’t hurt you. Crying because he betrayed you. Crying because Taeyong witnessed another man harass you in front of his eyes and didn’t do anything about it.

Your legs gave up, sliding down onto the floor as you cried.

“Y/N?” Joy didn’t want to barge into your room. Curiosity was eating her up to learn what happened, but she knew you well enough that you needed your space.

When she didn’t hear a response from you and only your cries, she decided to message him.

- ❀ -

“There’s no way Y/N would cheat on you! Do you even hear yourself?”

“But it’s true. I saw it, Johnny.”

“Nonsense! I don’t believe it. Seriously use your brain Taeyong!”

None of his friends believed him. They’d known you for almost half a year now. They had a feeling that you wouldn’t do anything to break the trust of your friends, especially your boyfriend. Jaehyun was something they all assumed at first before Jaehyun cleared it up.

“Isn’t it a coincidence that at the same time Bella talked to you, that guy was with Y/N too?” Ten voiced out. “What if it was a setup?”

Now that Taeyong had thought through the entire situation at the library, he was getting more afraid that he had gotten into Bella’s words and wrongly mistrusted you. Even worse, he felt like killing himself for not saving you and beating Lucas up for what he did to you.

You needed help and Taeyong, literally a few steps away, overlooked that and turned the table on you.

He gripped his hair in anger and hung his head low in disappointment.

Johnny’s phone began ringing and excused himself out the living room. “Hey Joy,” he greeted not sounding as cheerful as he usually would.

“What happened? Y/N is bawling her eyes out and I have no idea how to calm her down.”

He explained the case to her and at the end of it, Joy was gripping her phone so tightly that she was close to throwing it at the wall. “I’m going to kill Taeyong!” she screamed, her face going all red. “Where is he?”

“As much as we want to knock sense in him, we need to think of a way to clear the misunderstanding.”

Joy sat down on the couch, counting numbers in her head to calm herself down. “Okay, but I’m never forgiving him for this.”

The doorbell rang and Joy got up to answer it. She swung the door open revealing a worried Jaehyun.

- ❀ -

“Who the hell was that guy? We need to talk to him.” Mark said.

“More like we need to beat him to pulp for doing that to Y/N!” Yuta corrected. “The exact thing someone should have done at that time,” he said throwing shade at Taeyong.

Taeyong wanted to dig his own grave the more the boys talked about it.

The front door slammed open, the person not bothering to close it. Jaehyun looked around for the boy at fault, making eye contact with him and stormed over. Standing right in front of the sitting boy, he demanded for Taeyong to stand up. Taeyong did without hesitation and was ready to accept a blow as he deserved it. The rest of the boys gathered around closely, ready to hold back Jaehyun if a fight broke out.

“Listen to me carefully Taeyong. As much as I want to punch you in the face, I’m not a man of violence. And Y/N would never want that either.”

Upon hearing your name, Taeyong’s heart broke even more.

“Y/N gave you a chance. She could have easily moved on with her life without you. Heck she could have lived her life without confessing to you. There was literally no need for a relationship seeing how you two have problems! The reason why she gave you a chance is because she loves you.”

A tear slipped down Taeyong’s face. Everything that came out of Jaehyun’s mouth was true and hit him right in the center of his heart. You and him couldn’t have happened if it weren’t for you two gathering the courage to get over the personal issues. What you had with him was fragile and a slight sever in the relationship would mean an end to the trust.

“What do I do now?” Taeyong whispered more to himself.

Jaehyun heard him. “You’re going to beg for her forgiveness. And you’re not giving up.”

- ❀ -

The night fell, and you laid your head on your beloved friend’s lap. Your eyes were closed due to the fatigue that added up when you cried, and Joy gently stroked your hair in efforts to soothe your aching heart.

Your phone was on silent, not in the mood to communicate with anyone. It sat beside Joy so she could check to see if you’d get any urgent notifications.

You hadn’t spoken a word when you left your room. Joy was immensely relieved for you to have finally come out of your room that she didn’t mind your silence. Baby steps, she thought. You’d talk in due time when you were ready.

The phone lit up beside her, her eyes landing on it right in time. She didn’t want to ask you in fear that you’d start crying again and so on your behalf, Joy declined Taeyong’s incoming call.

Taeyong knew it wasn’t going to be easy for you to forgive him. But like Jaehyun said, he wasn’t going to give up.

- ❀ -

The next few days, you had been avoiding Taeyong. He would call and message so often that you had enough of the painful sensations in your heart every time you saw a notification from him and blocked him altogether.

When his attempts to get through you with his phone failed, he decided to make a trip to your apartment. You had seen it coming and told Joy to handle him while you hid in your room.

Joy wasn’t going to risk opening the door in case Taeyong invited himself in without permission. When she heard a series of doorbell ringing, she unlocked her phone to call him.

“Taeyong leave.”

“No! Please let me see her,” he pleaded. She could hear the hoarseness in his voice.

“Y/N doesn’t want to. And I’m not opening the door so instead of wasting your time and giving her stress because she’s clearly trying to avoid you, leave.” There was not a single ounce of warmth in Joy’s tone. She had given Taeyong a chance to not let her down, and he did the exact thing she feared.

Taeyong heaved a sigh of defeat, giving up until he thought of a better way to get closer to you.

Joy breathed out in relief, thankful that he left without making much of a commotion. She cautiously walked over to your closed room and put her ear against the door. Instead of your cries, she was met with your silence. Opening your door, she found you sitting on your bed, your arms hugging your legs and your chin rested on top. Your eyes void of any emotions as you tried to numb the agony in your heart.

Joy carefully sat down beside you as if you were a bubble that would burst any second. “Can I ask you something?”

You inhaled deeply and nodded.

“Are you going to break up with him?”

Break up... with Taeyong.

The thought of ending your relationship with Taeyong sent a million pins and needles at your heart. Regardless of everything that happened, that was one thing you wished never happened. He made you happy, feel so alive with a love that you had never experienced in your life.

But flashbacks to the what happened in the library killed you.

“No,” you croaked out. “But he-”

“I know everything Y/N. Johnny told me. I’m not trying to take his side after what he did to you. But nothing like what you think actually happened between him and that girl.”

A pinch of pain lifted from your heart, hoping your boyfriend was as innocent as your friend claimed. “What? But he had-”

“That girl apparently jumped on him. The others think this was a set up to break you and Taeyong up.”

- ❀ -

The next time you had a class with Jaehyun, he didn’t dare to speak about Taeyong to you and opted to talk about other things. You were starting to feel better with the impression that Lucas personally didn’t want to inflict any harm on you. And you had confirmed this the next time you saw him on campus with Jaehyun thankfully beside you.

You took cover behind Jaehyun when Lucas approached holding his hands up to show that he meant no harm.

“Look I’m really sorry. I only did as I was told and I didn’t actually mean to scare you like that,” he said to your eyes as you peeked over Jaehyun’s shoulder.

“Why did you do it?” Jaehyun asked coldly.

“She was giving me money for it. It was a dick move but don’t we need money as broke students? And I was going to tell you the truth after I got the money. Seriously.”

Jaehyun looked over his shoulder at you, wordlessly asking you for the next move. Your heart rate slowed down when you decided to believe in Lucas. “But why would that girl do that?” you asked.

Lucas shook his head, not knowing the exact reason. “I think she’s jealous. As a lot of girls would be. Taeyong is really popular. For them to hear that he’s in a relationship would… you know?”

You nodded slowly and came out from behind Jaehyun, feeling a lot braver.

“Once again Y/N, I’m really sorry for scaring you.” When you stayed silent, he took your silence as a sign to leave.

Jaehyun let out a sigh and turned to you, observing your silence.

You were still hurt by Taeyong’s lack of trust in you, led astray by someone else’s words. The girls were going to be an issue. You figured that they weren’t going to stop, which meant that if you and Taeyong wanted to keep the relationship alive, an unbreakable trust had to be formed.

But you didn’t know if you could trust Taeyong just yet. He did it once. He could do it again. Taeyong was going to have to win your heart if he was serious about you.

For that, only time could tell.

- ❀ -

Jaehyun informed Taeyong of your encounter with Lucas. When Taeyong learned that it was all Bella’s plan, his blood boiled in anger. Not at Bella. Not at Lucas.

At himself.

He was almost about to give up on you as you deserved someone so much better than what he was. Pathetic. But Jaehyun knocked some sense in him to not give into his frustration and instead think of a way for you to forgive him.

Taeyong got into contact with Joy, asking her when you would be at your place and assured her that he wasn’t going to see you.

The first time he came by, Joy trusted Taeyong to not barge in and opened the door. He quietly stood there, unmoving, holding some things.

Your ear was pressed against the bedroom door in attempt to eavesdrop their conversation. You couldn’t make out the inaudible mumbles until-

“Y/N come out!”

Your heart rate picked up. Was Joy calling you out while Taeyong was there? You opened the door enough for one eye to check on the situation, but it didn’t give you much of a view.

Seeing that you were taking awhile, she added, “He’s not here. Don’t worry.”

You opened the door fully and walked out, heading to the direction of the voice. In the kitchen, you saw Joy lay a bouquet of lilacs on the counter along with a tray holding two drinks and a small bag of baked goods fitted in one of the empty cup spots.

“What’s this?” you asked surprised.

“He gave you, well us these treats so we can have energy to study. And these flowers... he didn’t say anything.”

The dull pain inside you converted into a blossoming feeling. Your heart warmed at the thought that Taeyong was taking care of you when you weren’t talking to him and refused to see him.

Joy noticed a white note tucked in between the stems of the bunch. “Oh there’s something here. I think you should read it.” She handed you the note.

Slowly you unfolded it and read his handwriting.

- I’m sorry. I don’t deserve you. I’m not worthy for you to forgive me. But please take care of yourself. Don’t fall sick. Don’t stress too much. Eat well, sleep well too. I love you.

- ❀ -

Everyday Taeyong came to drop off some food and beverages, whether it’d be from a coffee shop, your favourite takeout or even his homemade foods that you loved so much. Joy would see the forced smile and the gloomy look in his eyes during the delivery. He wouldn’t say anything to Joy and before she could ask about himself, Taeyong would already be walking away.

One day, Joy had to meet Johnny and Ten for a review session. You were home alone and Taeyong wanted to give you food.

But how was he going to do it without you seeing him?

You got a message from Joy.

Joy: Taeyong is going to doorbell and drop some food by the door. He’ll leave right away so you won’t see him

Your heart accelerated. Every time you saw Joy place food on the counter that Taeyong brought for you, your heart melted. The note he had given you on the first day was tucked safely in your notebook, seeing it right away upon opening it. The lilacs were sitting in the living room in a white vase. Every time you walked out of your bedroom, your eyes would land on them, thinking about the first time you saw them with him.

The doorbell rang.

Taeyong.

You tried to calm down your quickened breathing, debating whether you should catch him or wait for his departure. Ultimately, you decided against waiting for him to leave, a small flicker in you wanted to see him.

You opened the door and saw a cloth bag on the floor with clear glass containers of the foods he cooked. You turned your head right in time to catch a glimpse of his figure, walking into the elevator and not glancing back at you.

- ❀ -

After you finished writing your first midterm, you pulled out your phone and dialed a number.

“Y/N! Oh my God! How are you?”

You smiled at hearing Ten’s cheerful voice. “I’m okay thanks. How are things with you?”

He groaned. “Ugh, what can I possibly say about math? Why did I do this to myself? Anyways what’s up?”

“Is Taeyong near you?”

“No I’m alone.”

“Do you know what he’s doing today? Like is stressed for anything right now?”

He was silent for a bit. “I don’t know what he’s doing today. He’s pretty unpredictable these days. Why- Wait a minute! Don’t tell me you want to see Taeyong!”

Ten took your stunned silence as a yes and you heard him scream a series of yeses, cuing you to cut the call. The entirety of your midterm exam, you couldn’t stop the gnawing at your heart, couldn’t stop thinking about Taeyong.

Going to the blocked contacts list, you found Taeyong’s number and unblocked him. On the messages app, your fingers hovered over the keyboard, afraid of what he felt towards you. Would he be mad at you for not talking to him this long? Your fear was irrational because he wouldn’t have dropped by every day to deliver food if he was. Maybe he did it every day because he became used to it.

You took a deep breath in and typed a message, sending it right away.

Taeyong felt his phone vibrate beside him. He was currently working on the written assignment that was supposed to happen at the library before the unfortunate event. He pried his burning eyes away from the laptop screen and onto his phone, his heart stopping.

A message from you.

At the speed of light, he picked his phone up, wishing his eyes weren’t playing a trick on him.

It really was you.

Love: Are you busy?

He wanted to call you. He was desperate to hear your voice. But he didn’t want to push his luck.

Taeyong: No

Love: Where are you?

Taeyong: At home

Love: Can you meet me?

Taeyong: Of course, where?

Love: Parking lot of the campus. We’ll go somewhere from there.

He wasted no time, grabbing the essentials including his phone this time, and hurried out the door.

You waited at the spot, trying to think of where to go. For what you wanted to talk about, you wanted it to be a secluded area where no one else would likely be at that time. Lost in your thoughts of where to go, you didn’t hear a car pull up beside you.

Taeyong’s car.

He stepped out and rounded his car, walking closer to where you stood on the curb. “Y/N,” he called you quietly, scared that he was going to make a wrong move and have you run away from him.

When you locked your gaze with his, you felt the time slow down. You missed him so much. You longed to feel the warmth in his arms, like he would be shielding you from the world. You missed the feeling of his lips on you. You missed spending time with him, cuddling with him, kissing him. Everything.

You missed him because you loved him, but you didn’t know if you could trust your heart to him just yet.

“Tae,” you whispered and a tear slip down your face, instantly drying from the chilly weather.

Taeyong smiled genuinely for the first time after a while, and it made you feel a bit better that he wasn’t mad at you. “Thank you. And I’m really sorry. I’ll spend the rest of my life saying sorry-”

“Don’t,” you cut him off. “I wanted to talk to you.”

He nodded frantically. “I’ll listen to anything you say.”

You asked Taeyong to drive you both to the conservation park, the same one where you confessed to him. The drive there was silent. You weren’t going to make small talk with him just yet. Meanwhile, Taeyong’s hand were getting sweaty as he gripped the steering wheel tightly, nervous about what you were going to say. He didn’t know if you were breaking up with him or not, and the thought of you doing so devastated him.

After he parked the car, you wasted no time and got out of the car with Taeyong following. You thought hard contemplating whether to do it or not, and at the end let your heart give in. When he jogged up to you, you laced your fingers with his. The small action made Taeyong’s heart explode, sending an immense amount of hope that things might become okay between you two.

You led him along the trails in the forest, walking in the familiar direction when you and Joy came here for the first time.

Taeyong recognized the path that once led him to the big surprise and thought you were taking him there. To reminisce that night. But he was wrong when you passed the spot. You were taking him somewhere else.

You stopped at the end of the trail, leaving Taeyong speechless. In front of his eyes was a sparkling blue lake with trees decorated along the other inaccessible side. The water sat still, unmoving in the chilly weather, creating a perfect mirror on its surface. Only a few ripples in the presence of gentle wind broke it fleetingly before regaining the seamless reflection.

“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” you asked.

Taeyong agreed but stayed mute. He was waiting for you to talk. The main reason why you wanted to see him.

“I wanted to tell you something no one knows. Something Joy doesn’t know... about my past,” you continued.

He felt his heart stop beating. You never brought it up to him and so he didn’t you were ever going to talk about it.

You squeezed his hand a little tighter out of anxiety. You didn’t ever want to talk about it, thinking that it wasn’t going to really mean anything now. It was your pain that you grew up witnessing. It was supposed to be something left in the past and never brought up again. For that reason, you were never ready to talk about it.

But if you and Taeyong wanted to form an unbreakable trust, you had to open up to him, even if it was just a little, and have him understand why you were the way you were.

“Joy asked me once a while back whether it was because of my dad. For not being interested in relationships. I guess it is.”

“Why?” he asked gently.

“Because he emotionally abused my mom.”

You heard him gasp and it felt as if time had stopped around you, memories of your past flooding back to you.

Speaking ill about your significant other, belittling them, asserting dominance. That wasn’t love. Invalidating their feelings, making them cry, having no respect for them. That wasn’t love. It was emotional torture. Not just to your mom but to you witnessing it all as well. You were in a way grateful to be an only child so your unborn siblings wouldn’t have to see it and mature the way you did.

With a gentle squeeze of your hand, Taeyong brought you back to the present moment. “Y/N, I’m so sorry,” he spoke so softly.

You shook your head. “No, I’m sorry. I don’t think I can say anything more. It’s too hard for me. It’s something I try to forget. But I guess it’s scarred in my heart.”

“And you don’t have to say more. I understand.” He rubbed his thumb in circles on the back of your hand, hoping to soothe you.

“I became aware of it in middle school that it wasn’t supposed to be normal. It was too much for me to see my own dad do it to my mom. That’s why I guess I never bothered myself with boys and relationships.”

“Oh my God, I’m really-”

“Don’t you dare say sorry again.”

He bit his tongue before that word slipped out. “But... can I ask you something... about them?”

“Yeah.”

“Are they still together?”

“Yes.”

“Why didn’t your mother leave him?”

You thought that too. You desperately wished for them to divorce or just live separately. It killed you to see your mom be tormented and broken-hearted every single day. “She never left him because she was dependent on him. And she would claim that it wasn’t the real him and it was his way of showing love.” You thought it was absurd. You knew she was lying. But as a child, you didn’t know what else to do other than to accept it.

“Are they still the same?”

You shook your head. “I don’t know when or why things changed after I left for uni. Whenever I’d go back to see them, it looks like my dad is putting an effort to not hurt my mom. Something must have happened after I left that knocked some sense in him, I guess,” you chuckled to yourself. Even though your dad was getting better at respecting your mom, the pain of seeing of your mom cry to herself every day remained in your heart.

Taeyong was quiet for a moment. The scar from your past was still there and he wanted to be careful and not prick it by saying the wrong thing. After some thought, he asked, “Can I ask you something?”

You laughed quietly, remembering the day when this exact thing happened with the roles reversed. “Yeah.”

“Can you trust me?” He made his mind up. Knowing about you and your past, he was never going to doubt you again. He wasn’t going to jump to conclusions like the way he did with Jaehyun and Lucas.

“I can. But not if you-”

“I won’t ever make assumptions or doubt you again. Like the way I did with Jaehyun and Lucas. I’ll always trust you with my whole heart. I mean it.” He gave your hand a gentle squeeze.

You sent him a weak smile. “Okay. I’m trusting you.”

He smiled at you in a loving manner to which you reciprocated.

You reminded yourself of one more thing to say. “Also Tae, I’m sorry.”

He was puzzled by your apology. Why are you when I’m the one at fault, he thought. “For what?”

“For doubting you, for kissing that girl.”

He shook his head frantically. “You shouldn’t be the one to say sorry. It’s all my fault. It wouldn’t have gotten bad if I didn’t... I’m really-”

“Tae,” you narrowed your eyes on him.

He gave you an awkward smile and cleared his throat. “So... you won’t break up with me?”

You laughed. “As serious as everything I said sounds, and for something that you realized your mistake after, I can give you another chance. You’re lucky I love you so much.”

Taeyong let out a deep breath, feeling his shoulders lighten incredibly. “Thank goodness. I thought the talk was going to be about us breaking up.”

You tenderly smiled at him. “How can I break up with you when you sent food every day? Especially when you sent me your delicious home-cooked meals. That’s literally so sweet of you,” you cooed.

Though the cold air coloured his cheeks rosy, your compliment made his cheeks turn beet red. He giggled it off and showcased his beautiful heart-stopping smile. “I love you too, Y/N.”

- ❀ -

Ten had spread the news of you getting into touch with Taeyong at the speed of light. When Taeyong brought you to his place, everyone was waiting to see the good news. Mark jumped repeatedly on the spot in excitement, squealing and slapping Yuta’s arm in the process. “Ow Mark!” Johnny gave Joy a side hug, and observed a faint pink colour her cheeks, smiling at her. Joy finally forgave Taeyong after you had done so. As long as you were happy with him and everything got sorted out, she was happy. And last but not least, Jaehyun. He was very delighted to see his roommate win your heart again that his dimples were permanent on his face the entire day.

The big day arrived. Valentine’s day. Jaehyun had once told you that it was a blessing to have his birthday fall on a special day. He would receive double the gifts from his admirers. He recalled his high school days where gifts were piled on top of his desk and the locker would be filled with both birthday wishes and love letters. He was beyond excited to see his new friends prepared for his birthday slash Valentine’s day party.

Joy, Johnny and Ten had already gone to the venue to set up everything, while Mark and Yuta were in charge of taking Jaehyun around the city before bringing him there.

In the meantime, you were granted to have some quality time, as said by Ten, with your boyfriend before the party.

Boyfriend.

Taeyong.

The thought of him made you squeal in happiness, feeling warm and fuzzy in your heart.

Your heart leaped when you heard the doorbell ring to your apartment, signaling your loveable boyfriend’s arrival. When you opened the door, you found him affectionately smiling at you with crinkling eyes, holding a bouquet of red roses.

You grabbed his arm, pulled him inside and closed the door. When his gaze landed on your outfit, his eyes blew up. “Are you wearing a dress?”

Your heart was beating super fast, excited to show off the rose print dress. “Yeah! Do you like it?” You did a little twirl to make the dress flow. “I know it’s cold outside but as long as I’m with you, I’ll be warm,” you said, grinning widely.

Taeyong was close to fainting from your cuteness. “It’s really beautiful. I’ve never seen you wear a dress before.”

You nodded. “Yeah I don’t really like wearing one. But I saw this and thought it’d be perfect to wear it on a special occasion. Like today for Valentine’s day. Plus you love red roses.”

He did love red roses, the ones that resembled the scar beside his right eye. And you remembering it made his heart beat erratically in his chest. He pulled you into a crushing hug, holding you close to him as he placed a kiss on your forehead that ignited your entire soul.

“Okay as much as I love your hugs, the flowers are poking me, Tae,” you laughed.

“Oh.” He let you go, holding up the bouquet for you. “It’s Valentine’s Day so I wanted to give you these.”

You took hold of the red flowers, admiring their beauty. “Thank you. They’re really beautiful. Like you.”

He coughed, getting all shy from your compliment attack. “Only because it’s Valentine’s day. If it wasn’t, do you know what I’d get you?”

You frowned and shook your head. “No. What?” Your heart soared upon seeing the sweetest smile broke onto his face.

“Magenta lilacs.”

156 notes · View notes

kaeyas-beloved · 4 years

Note

Hi! If that's okay with you can i request class 1a w/ a new foreign student (italian specifically but you can just do foreign in general of you prefer) Who their quirk is having psychic powers? Like Saiki k for example.

I’m literally begging you to forgive me for taking so long to finish this T_T

Also, this turned into a scenario of the class meeting the new student and then a couple HC points, hopefully that’s alright with you and hopefully you enjoy this. Again, I’m really sorry for taking eons to do this and I’m sorry if they’re not that good either.

Class 1-A w/ a Psychic Quirked Italian!Reader

"Everyone take your seats..." Mr. Aizawa sighed, his voice thick with sleep as always. Like clockwork the entirety of Class 1-A quieted down and were ready to begin yet another day of school. It was a routine that they've all fallen into, and since it was the middle of the semester, it's now second nature to stop as soon as their home room teacher started talking.

It's become so repetitive and mundane that no one had expected big news to be thrown at them.

"Before we start today's lesson I'd like all of you to meet someone..." without another word the raven haired teacher glanced at the door, beckoning someone into the classroom.

Gently the grey doors slid open fully to reveal a new face.

"Introduce yourself then please take a seat so we can start the lesson..." They nodded, flashing a quick smile at the class before introducing themselves.

"Ciao! I'm (Y/N) (L/N) and I recently moved to Japan from Italy!" Almost immediately questions were erupting left and right, voices mingling into one loud, unintelligible jumble.

"Enough!" Aizawa's eyes turned red and his hair started floating - an indication that they should stop while they still could. When everyone calmed back down the raven haired Pro mumbled something about going one at a time before he crawled into a yellow sleeping bag, falling to the ground with a thud.

After a moment of silence the rowdy group was somehow able to ask their questions calmly and orderly. Some asked what it was like in Italy, others hoped that (Y/N) could say something in they're native language just to hear how it sounded. There was this one purple haired kid that nearly said something but was promptly cut off by several classmates.

None could help themselves, it was someone new that would be with the class for the rest of the year, it's only natural that all of them would be curious.

Finally, the question that everyone wanted to know was brought up - truly, it was a wonder how it wasn't the first thing to be asked.

"What's your quirk?" They, the new kid, smiled, leaning back against the teacher's podium.

"My quirk? It's called Psychic. It's exactly what it sounds like, I'm a psychic." Immediately a curly haired boy - Midoriya - pulled out his notebook and pencil, ready to write down every aspect of his new classmate's quirk.

A blond with a black lightening streak in his hair spoke up, "That's so cool! ...Uhhh, what's a psychic though?"

"Kaminari you dunce it's... uh... yeah what exactly does it mean?" A girl beside him with elongated earlobes asked. A chuckle rumbled throughout (Y/N)'s body, they'd already guessed that an explanation was going to be needed. After all, it happens every time.

"I can do many things as a psychic, but right now, I'll only give you one example. After all, we have training later today right? It would be unfair if you all knew what I could do but I didn't know any of your quirks."

'Tch, just get on with it already damn it...'

'I was about to spiky~'

"What the hell!!" Bakugou, who on the outside had been completely calm for once, suddenly jumped in his seat, eyes full of shock.

"Bakugou!?" Kaminari laughed, slamming his fist repeatedly against his desk, along with a few others who were also trying (and failing) to hold in their giggles.

"S'cusa... I can read minds for one." (Y/N) chuckled, a smirk on their face. The angry blond shot them a glare but didn't comment. To him, it wasn't worth the trouble.

"What else can you do!?" Hagakure questioned.

They thought a moment, "I guess I can show you one more trick..." Everyone waited in anticipation.

"A-Asui!!" Mina exclaimed.

"I told you to call me Su..." the frog like girl sighed.

"No, look!" Nearly ever pair of eyes widened at the sight in front of them. Tsuyu's hair, which was neatly done in a bow like style, bobbed gently in the air.

"Ribbit?" Immediately all the girls started poking at the levitating hair in childish curiosity.

"Ochako, this isn't you is it?"

"No, it can't be. My seat is too far for me to have touched it."

The snapping of fingers caught the ladies attention, and the effect ceased.

"It was you!" Mina pointed dramatically.

"It was"

"Mindreading... telekinesis... what else can they do? What are the drawbacks? Conditions of the quirk?" Midoriya could be heard mumbling off to the side.

"Show us more!"

"Yeah!" A majority of the class shouted, eager to see more.

"Ah ah ah~ You'll have to find out during training, sorry!" they smiled, beginning to make their way to the door, "one more thing. Can one of you help me find the English room?" The bell rang, signaling the end of the period and the exchange student smiling, walking out the door.

"I like them!" Uraraka exclaimed, Kirishima nodding in agreement.

"Yeah! They were even able to scare Baku-Bro!"

"Shut up!"

----

-> After that the more prankster students (Denki, Sero, Mina, etc) would definitely ask them to mess with others using their quirk (mainly Bakugou)

-> At the same time though everyone was curious about what else they could do, after all it's a very slim chance to get into the hero course with a quirk like mind reading or simple telekinesis. Plus, (Y/N) said that that they could do many things.

-> And Oh boy they can

-> Teleportation, Pyro/Cryo/Hydrokinesis, Hypnosis

-> Many of the students (even some of the teachers) were amazed by what they were capable of.

-> Some remarked that it was a lot like Todoroki's quirk, his a two in one while theirs's is like a full on box set.

-> Going back to the topic of Baku real quick, he may get pissy with getting pranked all the time but the boy has mad respect for the new kid. Their quirk is strong, he can admit that (reluctantly and not out loud of course) and he sees them as a worthy opponent and an obstacle in his journey to become the Number One Hero.

-> Midoriya asked them any questions he could regarding their quirk, he's never seen or heard of a quirk like theirs's so of course he's insanely interested.

-> More times than either can count (Y/N) had to initiate a conversation seeing as Mido is shy and didn't want to offend/bother them with all the questions he has.

-> Regarding being Italian, no one in Class 1-A cares that their not from Japan, accepting them as they would anyone else. They will, however, kick someone's ass into next month if someone was to bully them because of it *cough* Monama *cough*

-> Adding onto that, everyone loves their accent (even those who won't admit it). It might have to do with the fact that it's something new to them, they've heard both Japanese and some English but never Italian.

-> The Class would swoon every time you said something in Italian even if it's insulting - they don't know any better!

~~~

Requests are closed right now, but that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy my other works while you wait for them to open! You might find something you like, who knows :)

Masterlist

#bnha class 1a #class 1a x reader #Class 1A #MHA Class 1A #foreign!reader #my hero academia #bnha #bnha headcanons #bnha scenario #class 1a scenario #mha #mha headcanons #mha scenario #class 1-a headcanons #class 1-a x reader #bnha x reader #mha x reader

418 notes · View notes

asterroidd · 4 years

Text

levi’s delivery service

↬ College AU

↬ Pairing: Levi Ackerman x Reader

↬ Word count: 1.3k

↬ Synopsis: As one sleep deprived college student amidst finals week, you never anticipated that your crush would be outside of your apartment at 2 am with cheese pizza.

Awake but at what cost?

Your tired eyes scanned your notes once again, hands gripping your hair in frustration as you found yourself having difficulty in understanding the lesson. It had been a couple of minutes already ever since you are stuck on that one page of your textbook, thoughts scrambled and information hardly processed. Oh, how much you wanted to just throw the damn book across the room and jump onto the sweet embrace of your bed. Alas, you can’t since you need to have a passing grade for the course.

It was that time of the semester that every college student that exists fears.

Finals week.

It was the last push of caffeinated-driven system to freedom. The last battle that would decide if one would retake the course once again, or beg the professor for extra credits. And here you are between the fine line of death and life. It’s not that your grades are bad (it was the opposite rather), you have above average ones if you do say so yourself.

However, there is a slope of adversity that you had experienced that may ultimately cost you getting a passing grade. You just had to fail the surprise test that your asshole of a professor had suddenly given amidst a fit (one of your coursemates was too loud). What’s worse is that he made it to be a huge percentage of the final grade. Now, you have to rely on the finals exam—which is about forty percent worth—to at least get a passing grade.

So for the umpteenth time of the week, you are pulling an all-nighter just to review for the exams. You can’t afford to fail a course this semester or you’ll be drowning in student debt in no time. It didn’t even helped that your chosen degree is quite challenging. Bah, who are you even kidding?

It was the definition of hell.

“I fucking hate my life,” you groaned, closing the textbook all together and slumping against the chair. That one concept. That one lesson that despite how many times you have read (and searched online for other interpretations), you still can’t seem to understand or grasp it.

Your body was giving up, literally, with constant throbbing headaches, back pain that for sure hurts far worse that an old person’s, eyes bloodshot red after staring at the laptop screen for far too long with no rest. Not to mention the pit of anxiety settling on the bottom of your stomach, threatening bile to come up your throat.

Ah yes, the average night of a college student.

You still have exactly four days before the examination, maybe you could rest for a couple of hours. That said, when was the last time you ate?

As if on cue, your stomach grumbled. You blinked, recalling the events of your day in attempts to remember the last time you had a meal. You started the day off by opening the textbooks and notes, suppose you had a cup of ramen at that time and a toast. Then, you headed out for a quick trip to the library to pick up a few books that would help you. After that, you practically had your nose deep in the pages of your textbook in the comforts of your apartment. Oh, that explains why you were famished.

“Fuck it. I’m hungry,” you grabbed your phone, scrolling down your contacts list to call the local pizza place. You sure damn well deserve a whole twelve inch cheese pizza all to yourself after all of that hard work, and maybe a breadstick or two on the side as well as a bottle of soda. It may in be the wee hours of the morning, but a hungry stomach should not be ignored.

“Yes, that’s all. Thank you,” you then hung up, not even bothering to hear the other side of the line. Too sleep-deprived that you probably can’t muster up all of your energy to be cheerful. Your grasp with reality practically left you already. You swore, after the week is over, you would cage yourself in your apartment to watch the hell out of Netflix.

A little bit more. Just a few days more before freedom.

Now that your mind had officially drifted off the academic texts and onto the savory smell of food that would arrive at your doorstep at any moment, you doubt that you could focus again anytime soon. So with a final huff, you shut your laptop close as well as notebooks, never bothering to reorganize them into neat stacks since you knew you would be scrambling through them later on.

Your body screamed in joy once it hit the soft cushions of your bed, back sore after hours of being in a horrible sitting position. You pursed your lips, it would take an estimation of thirty minutes before your order would arrive, so maybe a quick nap wouldn’t hurt. Without a second thought, you let your eyes close shut, letting it rest after hours upon hours of strain after looking at your laptop screen. Soon enough, you welcomed the sweet embrace of sleep.

Though, it only felt like you were asleep for a few seconds.

Your eyes shot open, startled by the banging on the door of your apartment. Reluctantly, you pushed yourself off of the bed and trudged towards the door, fumbling through your wallet to get the exact amount of money as well as a few for a tip.

The knocking on the wooden door did not cease. In fact, it got even worse. The delivery personnel practically hammering their fists against it.

“I’m here. Geez, can’t you wait a litt-” you spat, ready to give them a piece of your mind but halted as you soon realized who it was. There stood before you in his workplace uniform, Levi Ackerman, your long-time friend and perhaps crush. Both of you knew each other since high school, being practically neighbors after his family moved in to your neighborhood. After that, you and he would be walking to and from school side by side, quite convenient at that matter.

“Levi? What are you doing here?” you exclaimed.

“I fucking hate you,” he grumbled. “I waited outside in the freezing cold for twenty minutes already.” He then shoved the pizza box to you quite harshly. You stared at him with mouth hanging open, too shocked to argue with him for his rude response. What the hell is he doing?

Levi sighed after seeing your reaction, “Don’t ask. Just a part time job. I needed cash.”

“Shouldn’t you be studying?” you rose a brow at him.

“Shouldn’t you be asleep?”

“Touché.”

His steel gray eyes watched you as you placed the pizza box on the table close by. Levi took note of the dark bags forming under your eyes, the disheveled look that you have, and the stench of cheap cup ramen noodles that radiated from you that made his nose scrunch. He knew that a plethora of students have a hard time during finals week, but he never anticipated you would also be affected by it. You had above-average grades during high school years, after all. Levi, in a million years, would never expect that you would be ordering pizza at two am in the morning.

Looks like college can change a student in some ways or another.

“Here you go, buster.” you uttered, tired eyes following Levi’s hands as he took the money from you.

“You look like shit,” he commented, stuffing the cash deep inside his pockets.

“Thanks. Haven’t sleep for three days straight,” you fought back a yawn. “Wanna head on inside for some pizza?”

Levi shook his head, “No thanks. Still on shift for the next hour or so.”

Then to your surprise, Levi rested his palm on top of your head, patting it lightly then ruffling your hair.

“Good luck on the exams. I’ll treat you to anything you want after,” he spoke, the tips of his lips curving lightly. Then he disappear into the night, leaving you in a shocked state after what he did. You let a smile appear on your face, cheeks hot after his own subtle way of asking you out.

Levi’s delivery service isn’t bad after all.

#levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #levi #levi ackerman #attack on titan #attack on titan x reader #shingeki no kyojin #shingeki no kyoujin x reader #aot #snk #aot x reader #snk x reader #reader insert #asters fics

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achubbydumpling · 3 years

Note

Modern Bucky is fat and Steve’s sugar baby. Steve likes to spoil him. :3

eyy only took me a month and a half to answer 😂😂 I'm sorry, nonnie, but I'm highjacking your idea and using it for today's chubtober prompt :D

(I ended up having a lot more ideas for this than I could actually finish writing in time, so this ends pretty abruptly as soon as Steve and Bucky actually meet)

[unfinished] Oct 3: Masks and Malfunctions

Rating: Mature Words: 1911 Relationship: James “Bucky” Barnes/Steve Rogers Additional Tags: Sugar Daddy AU, Daddy Kink, Belly Kink, Weight Gain, Verbal Humiliation, Stuffing, Corsets, Age Gap

Bucky’s phone chimed and he didn’t even have to look at the screen to know that “Steve” just sent him more than enough money for the costume Bucky wanted. He didn’t actually know if that was the guy’s real name, but he’d been funding Bucky’s lifestyle since the beginning of college and Bucky wasn’t about to fuck that up by questioning the guy’s identity.

If this were a normal Halloween party Bucky would have just bought a random costume at Spirit Halloween, but his kinda boyfriend Jonas (it’s complicated) had invited him as a plus one to an actual masquerade ball. Bucky didn’t even know those kinds of things existed outside of fantasy novels, but right now he was at a high-end clothing store getting an “appropriate” costume.

[Bucky] Thank you, Daddy❤

Bucky texted Steve and then went back to trying on another dress shirt. This one had a looser cut that reminded him of something the male love interest in a period drama would wear or a pirate.

“Wonderful choice,” the store clerk told Bucky when he stepped back from the mirror. Bucky would probably never get used to having someone help him pick out clothes, but the higher-end stores Bucky had been to all offered this type of assistance.

“It drapes very well,” the clerk said with a sneer on his face. Bucky turned back to the mirror. Yes, he had to admit he’d fallen victim to the freshman 15. A small belly was rounding out even against the loose fabric of the shirt, but he didn’t actually feel self-conscious.

Steve had complimented him on every single one of those pounds. Bucky probably wouldn’t even have noticed all the changes to his body if Steve hadn’t been constantly talking about them. Bucky had never put much effort into maintaining his physique, but being hyped up by Steve over the smallest changes of his body made him feel desired and his heart fluttered every time his sugar daddy complimented his thicker thighs and soft belly.

“Any other suggestions?” Bucky asked and the clerk scoffed.

“A corset,” he muttered under his breath, but Bucky’s ears pricked up at the suggestion. His first instinct was to text Steve. Bucky didn’t know why it was important for him to know Steve’s opinion when Bucky was going to the party as someone else’s plus one, but excitement stirred in Bucky’s stomach at what Steve might say.

“Sure, get the corset.” Bucky sent the clerk on their way and then sat down to text Steve. He could feel his belly straining against the shirt buttons now that he was sitting down and he snapped a picture of the way the buttons on the otherwise loose shirt were straining over the thickest part of his belly.

[Bucky] Daddy~ they’re telling me I’m fat

[Bucky] they said I need a corset

[Steve] You will look incredible either way.

Annoyance prickled at the back of Bucky’s neck from the generic compliment.

[Bucky] that’s not what I asked

[Steve] You didn’t ask anything.

Bucky rolled his eyes at how literal Steve could sometimes be, but Bucky also didn’t know how to ask for what he really wanted to hear.

Some of his classmates had teased him for his weight gain and instead of making Bucky feel insecure, the hot shame had shot straight to his dick and he’d had to excuse himself to deal with the problem. Since then Bucky couldn’t stop thinking about Steve telling him those things.

Bucky didn’t even know what the guy looked like, but he’d quickly developed a crush just from texting him. It was actually fun to talk. Bucky couldn’t understand how the guy was single when he seemed like this perfect, interesting and kind guy—and rich on top of all that.

There has to be something wrong with him, but so far Bucky hadn’t been able to figure it out. Not for the first time Bucky wondered who Steve actually was, but his thoughts were interrupted when the clerk came back with three different corsets.

All the same material and color, just different cuts. Bucky’s eyes were immediately drawn to the tiny waist cincher—just tall enough to cover the widest part of his belly. Despite his grumblings the clerk helped Bucky lace up the corset and when he looked in the mirror he couldn’t believe it was him looking back.

His entire body shape seemed different. From the billowing sleeves of the shirt emphasizing his wide shoulders to the waist cincher doing an excellent job of making it look like he still had a waist instead of the soft belly that was hidden underneath. The simple black slacks he was wearing completed his outfit. Simple colors, just black and white.

The mask he had chosen matched as well. A deep midnight black that contrasted with his piercing blue eyes and gold detailing that caught the light when Bucky turned his head. He snapped another picture for Steve, but didn’t wait for his response. Bucky could still hardly believe that a single outfit could be this expensive, but Steve of course had transferred enough money to pay for it. On his way home Bucky finally checked his phone.

[Steve] What did I tell you? Incredible.

[Bucky] better than without the corset?

[Steve] This feels like a set-up.

Bucky groaned at Steve’s response. Of course, Bucky would luck out and get the sugar daddy that won’t humiliate him for gaining fifteen pounds before the semester was even over and wasn’t that a personal revelation. Bucky had never thought of himself as someone who could want something like this, but since gaining weight he had become more aware of his body—and how others perceived it.

[Bucky] it is

He quickly pocketed his phone after sending that text. Bucky immediately regretted it. He’d had a good thing going with Steve. Why risk fucking that up? His phone vibrated multiple times, but Bucky was too worried to check his messages until he got home. As soon as he’d closed the apartment door behind him he fished his phone out of his pocket.

[Steve] What does that mean?

[Steve] If you don’t want to continue this arrangement, you can just tell me.

[Steve] Bucky.

[Steve] Answer me.

[Steve] What do you want me to say? That you’re a spoiled pig? That you’ve gotten fat on your Daddy’s money and need a corset to look good for your little boytoy?

Bucky’s throat went dry as he read Steve’s message. The wave of lust that crashed through him, threw him off balance and he sat down heavily on the bench in the entry way of his apartment. He read the message again. And again. His dick gave an interested twitch. It was embarrassing how much he reacted to Steve’s words.

[Steve] Is that what you want?

[Steve] Don’t leave me on read.

Bucky didn’t know what to say. He typed and retyped the same message again until another one from Steve popped up.

[Steve] ‘Yes’ or ‘no’? It can’t be this hard to type one fucking word.

Bucky couldn’t breathe. Steve had always been kind and considerate, it made Bucky’s heart race to see this side of him.

[Bucky] Yes.

[Steve] Thank you, but we will talk more about this tomorrow.

Bucky’s phone chimed to tell him, he should be on his way now if he wanted to get to the party on time. His mind was still caught up in foggy arousal, his cock tenting his slacks. It’s too much, he wasn’t thinking straight and Steve wasn’t even here—wasn’t even touching him. Just a text and Bucky was a mess.

At least the walk to the subway station helped to clear Bucky’s head and chase away some of the immediate, burning need that had been burning in his guts just a few minutes earlier. It left him frustrated, but slightly more level-headed and in a more appropriate mood to be out in public.

When Bucky met up with Jonas outside the high-rise office building the guy was already wasted. He was surrounded by his office buddies and Bucky was honestly about to turn on his heel and go back home when Jonas called out to him. With all his mates there Jonas treated Bucky like another one of them and Bucky was already over the metaphorical dick-measuring contest that was happening whenever one of these guys opened their mouth.

Once they got inside Bucky split off from the group, Jonas didn’t even seem to notice. So, he explored the venue. The party stretched across multiple floors. The bottom floor was full of rich and wanna-be rich people schmoozing and socializing, barely anyone of them had stuck to the masquerade theme and Bucky kept debating whether he should take off his own mask.

He was much more comfortable on the upper floor. There were less people here and most of them kept to themselves. He felt less out of place when he noticed that most of the people here stuck to the masquerade theme, there were only a few people who’s face wasn’t at least partially hidden behind a mask.

Jonas didn’t even shoot him a quick text to ask where he had disappeared to, so Bucky was more than ready to just find whatever food this place offered, eat for free tonight and make the best of the situation. He didn’t know what he’d expected dating someone his age, but Bucky was done settling for anything and he made a resolution to break up whatever was going on between him and Jonas.

When Bucky finally found the buffet that was standard for these types of events, he couldn’t stop himself from loading up two plates and searching for a quiet, secluded place to eat. At this point it had become a reflex to send Steve a text whenever he sat down to stuff himself.

[Bucky] found the food

He sent a picture with his hand next to the plates to give Steve a sense of how big they were. Some guy’s phone went off as soon as Bucky hit send two tables over and for a moment Bucky wondered if that’s Steve.

He had a commanding presence even sitting down. Bucky could tell he’s a gym buff from his ridiculous shape. His shoulders looked almost double the size of his waist. As well as the large plate of food in front of him. This man needed to fuel his body with all those calories, but Bucky was eating more than him and only planning on getting fatter. Bucky dug in.

His little costume went from fitting perfectly fine to too tight within half a plate of food. The corset was throwing a wrench into Bucky’s plan of stuffing himself. He already felt full before he had even really gotten started. The blond guy from two tables over caught Bucky’s eye again. He was frowning at his phone and looking back up at Bucky.

[Steve] What are you doing here?

[Bucky] what do you mean?

Another phone chime from two tables down. Bucky re-read the text two times before he looked back at the blond guy. No way that’s Steve. That would be too much of a coincidence, right? Bucky sent another message and the guy’s phone went off again. For a moment Bucky contemplates just getting up and walking away, but then Steve was already out of his chair and walking up to Bucky’s table.

#asks #chubby bucky #chubtober 2021 #chubby kink

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ncssian · 4 years

Text

A Favor: Part Nine

Nessian Modern AU

Masterlist

a/n: reading canon eris discourse literally makes me dizzy but in this fic he's pretty chill

***

“Any plans for Thanksgiving?” Emerie asks as they stroll between the shelves of the library.

Nesta runs her finger down the spine of a textbook on corporate law. “Not really,” she murmurs distantly.

She’s been doing her best not to think of the upcoming holidays, in fact. Cassian is going to Velaris for Thanksgiving, and of course Feyre invited Nesta as well, but…

She’s always ignored her sister’s holiday invites, but this year is different. Cassian, a recent constant in her life, will be gone, enjoying himself for the first time in months without her presence. And Nesta will be at the cabin alone, because of course she can’t celebrate Thanksgiving with Feyre’s found family. Being friends with Cassian hasn’t changed that.

“Well,” Emerie is saying, “a bunch of us can’t go home for the holidays for one reason or another, so we’re hosting a small Friendsgiving at my apartment. You’re invited.”

Nesta glances at her, surprised. “Who’s going to be there?”

“The same guys from drinks night: Eris, Justinian, Isaac. Maybe a plus one or two if we’re lucky.” She elbows Nesta. “Maybe a girl for me to take home.”

“I thought the party was at your home already?”

“You know what I mean. Anyway, are you coming?”

Nesta purses her lips. “But you said it was a Friendsgiving. Those guys aren’t my friends.”

Emerie looks at her like she's insane. “Uh, why not?”

“Because,” Nesta states, “we’ve only had one real interaction all semester.”

Emerie scoffs. “You talk to them all the time in class, Nesta.”

“Yes. Out of necessity.”

Emerie raises a high brow. “That’s how you view spending time with us? A ‘necessity’?”

She’s upset, and Nesta doesn’t know what she said wrong. “That’s not what I meant,” she tries to say.

“Then what did you mean?”

“I just…” Nesta shrugs. “I thought it took more to make friends than a single night out.” Those are the rules, right?

Emerie narrows her dark eyes at her. “I’m sorry we’re not up to standard, then. But for your information, those guys liked you. I’m sure they considered you a friend.” She turns to leave, but Nesta is so stunned she can’t even try to stop her. The click of Emerie’s heels resonate long after she’s gone.

“Hey,” Cassian comes up to her later that day. “About Thanksgiving—”

Nesta drops her dinner plate onto the island with a clatter. “What is it with everybody and Thanksgiving?” Her voice is unnecessarily loud.

Cassian blinks. “Well, it’s only a few days away—”

“I know,” she says. “I’m fine staying home alone. We never celebrated Thanksgiving growing up, you know? It’s really not a big deal.”

“Will you let me finish, Nesta?”

Nesta presses her lips together.

Cassian takes a breath. “I think you should— I would really love it if you came to Velaris with me this weekend.”

There’s a silence as he waits for her to answer.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” she says after a moment.

Before he can press the subject, she blurts, “I already have plans.”

“You do?” Nesta can’t tell if he sounds disappointed or surprised.

She straightens her back, lying through her teeth, “Yes. Some friends from school are getting together for a Friendsgiving, and I’m going.” She almost bites her tongue on the word friends. She doesn’t even know what that means anymore.

“That’s amazing,” Cassian says, though he still looks a little taken aback. “I’m glad.” He looks down at the marble counter then, trying to smile. “Sucks for me, though.”

Nesta huffs a laugh. “Please, like you won’t be having fun with your friends whether I’m there or not.”

He rolls his eyes. “Yeah, but why go for half the fun when I could go for double?”

“That’s not how math works,” she snipes.

Cassian grabs a fork so he can sit down across from Nesta. “Don’t you ever bring up correct math in this house again.” He points his silverware at her threateningly.

From there, they can devolve into their usual dinner habit of bantering that leads to more serious conversation. Cassian has recently been on a French movie binge, Nesta learns, and even though she despises the French, she listens closely to his analysis of each film and offers her own thoughts back. She even promises to rewatch one or two of his favorites at a later time. The giddiness he gives in return makes her almost wish she had accepted his invitation earlier, if only so she could keep making him happy.

God. What is he doing to her?

Later that night, Nesta pulls out her phone and opens up her messages with Emerie. She doesn’t want to have rejected Cassian just to end up staying home alone all weekend. She types out five different messages and erases them before settling on an apathetic, Is the invite for Thursday still on?

Emerie takes her time to reply, likely to punish Nesta. After some minutes, she finally texts, Yes.

It’s all she can expect from Emerie, and it’s all she needs to see.

Nesta: I’ll be there.

***

“Cassian!” Feyre swings open the door with an overjoyed smile, ready to greet him.

He laughs and steps in for a hug, going so far as to lift her feet off the floor. Because damn him, even with his conflicted feelings towards Feyre lately, he’s missed her. He’s missed all of his friends, even though he’s found something precious while he was away from them.

He’s ushered into the penthouse, which Feyre and Rhys insist on calling an “apartment”, as if that softens the blow of their extravagant wealth. Cassian and everybody else goes along with it, however, because the rich have committed worse crimes. At least that’s what Nesta says.

“Rhys is out getting last minute beer from the gas station,” Feyre says as she takes his overnight bag. “And you’re the first to arrive, which means I have you all to myself.” She whirls on him with a predatory gleam in her eye. “Tell me everything about the last two months with you and Nesta, ASAP.”

Cassian’s heart starts racing at the unexpected interrogation, but he laughs it off and shrugs. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. We’re just roommates.”

“Well, I know that.” Feyre rolls her eyes. “But what is it like? How is it going? Is she okay? Are you okay?”

Before he can answer a single question, Feyre goes on. “I haven’t heard from either of you in eons, it feels like. Is Nesta still picky about her foods touching? Does she get upset when you play music too loud? Does she—”

“Jesus, Feyre,” Cassian interrupts loudly. “Not everything in my life is about your sister. Give it a rest.” He takes his duffel bag back from her.

“I’m just curious!” she says indignantly, but Cassian is already heading up the winding stairs to his guest room, going as fast as he can without outright running.

“I need to get washed up!” he announces before Feyre can make him stop and come back for more questioning.

In the safety of his bedroom, he releases a breath.

If Cassian thought keeping Nesta’s health issues from Feyre was difficult, he couldn’t have predicted how painful it would be to hide his feelings for Nesta. Still, he doesn’t dare expose what he can’t yet define, especially not to his nosy-ass friends. Some things just aren’t matters for gossip.

***

Nesta hesitantly enters Emerie’s small studio apartment to a party in full swing; “full swing” being Justinian and Isaac playing video games on the couch while Emerie is in the kitchen area attempting to make drinks. Nesta stops near the kitchenette and crosses her arms, surveying the scene. “Something about this doesn’t look right,” she says aloud. Emerie doing the hard work while the men play? Antithetical to her very nature.

“I know,” is all Emerie says without looking up from whatever hellish concoction she’s whipping up. “But I’m the host, so this is my role.”

“Hey, Nesta,” the guys speak up together, not taking their eyes off the TV. Isaac is the first to break his concentration from the game, glancing at Nesta and doing a double take. “Woah, you look good today.” Is he blushing?

Emerie finally looks up at that, eyeing Nesta’s modest black dress. “A little funeral-chic, but still hot as ever, babe.” Right after, she makes a face at the term babe. “Nope, I tried it and I hate it.”

Nesta hates it just as much, but goes over to help Emerie with what she now realizes are oddly colored Jello shots. She picks up a little plastic cup with dark jelly in it and wiggles it around. “What color is this supposed to be?”

“Brown.” Emerie blows a piece of escaped hair out of her face. “They were supposed to be Thanksgiving themed.”

Nesta surveys the shots arranged in various fall colors. Definitely an interesting choice for a twenty-four year old law student, but what did Nesta know about parties?

“Where’s Eris?” she asks casually as she helps arrange more cups. Her argument with Emerie is far from forgotten, but the two women are too alike for their own good. They’ll ignore the lingering tension until it dissipates, and that will be the end of that.

Before Emerie can answer Nesta’s question, a loud bang comes from the entryway as the already open door hits the wall. Eris Vanserra sweeps inside in his designer coat and sophisticated boots, followed by a new, striking face. “It’s fucking freezing,” he announces, just as the new guy quietly shuts the door behind them.

“You’re late,” Emerie says in her usual flat tone.

“I had to pick up my twerp brother.” Eris tilts his head toward the redhead behind him.

“I didn’t ask to come,” the new guy, Eris’s brother, chimes in.

Nesta is perked up now, angling to get a better look at him. Same hair color, same eyes, different skin tone from Eris. He looks like the relaxed, unpretentious version of his brother. Someone pauses the video game.

“I’m Lucien,” he awkwardly raises a hand.

Justinian looks at everybody else. “I’m confused— does this mean we can finally replace Eris’s punk ass?”

The thought of an unexpected guest first makes Nesta clench up, especially when she’s seated right next to the damn guy at the dining table. New people means everything about the regular social routine will be changed up, and she isn’t at all prepared for it.

It takes maybe fifteen minutes for her to realize that Lucien is nothing to worry about— much quicker than she’s ever warmed up to a stranger before.

He has the affected quiet confidence of someone who would rather be anywhere else but here. No one knows that mask better than Nesta.

Against all odds, she’s the first to initiate a conversation.

“Why are you here?” she says bluntly.

No hello, no how are you. Fuck, this is why she doesn’t talk to people.

Lucien looks surprised at the sudden acknowledgment, but answers, “My plans got cancelled at the last minute.” His mouth tightens as he looks toward his brother. “So Eris dragged me here instead.”

“You don’t like your brother?”

Lucien narrows his eyes at her, defensive. “Is this an interrogation or something?”

Embarrassment heats Nesta’s face, but she hides it under her usual cold stare. “Never mind.”

She turns back to her food, refocusing on an anecdote Isaac is giving about a girl he met the other week. A moment later, Lucien says lowly, “I can’t stand my brother.”

She laughs a little too loudly at that, and everyone looks at her.

Isaac grins. “See, Nesta thinks it’s a funny story.”

Nesta frowns. “No, I don’t. You told it last week and no one laughed.”

His face falls. Eris laughs out loud at him, and Emerie tosses wadded up napkins at both men. “You’re both deeply uninteresting. Let’s talk about me.”

She launches into a heated discussion about how she plans to defeat “that bitch Brian” for the internship at Velaris’s biggest law firm next summer, with Eris interjecting that she wouldn’t survive a day in the big city. Nesta turns back to Lucien. “I understand how you feel.”

“You hate Eris too?”

“No, but I have sisters.” Eris is nice, if a pretentious asshole at times, but she empathizes with Lucien either way.

He raises a brow. “And you’re here for Thanksgiving instead of with them?”

For the first time all night, Nesta remembers that Cassian is having fun in a spacious penthouse with Feyre and Elain and the others, likely eating much nicer food than store-bought turkey and Jello shots, and she almost deflates. Almost. Because as much as she enjoys this— spending time with people that belong to her, not Feyre or anybody else— there’s a hollow space in the room that Cassian usually fills. She doesn’t know how she can miss someone and be this thoroughly content at the same time, but she tries not to ponder on her feelings.

She shrugs at Lucien’s question. “We’re all here instead of with our families.”

What would have been a thirty-minute meal on Nesta’s own stretches into a long night of full bellies and fuller conversation. Justinian demands a toast in honor of Friendsgiving, and Emerie tells him not to pull that cringy shit, but everyone ends up raising their small Jello shots to clink against each other.

Thanksgiving might be Nesta’s favorite holiday.

***

Cassian doesn’t know what this feeling is: the itching, nervy sense of impatience that plagues him the longer dinner drags on. All he knows is that tonight Mor’s laughter is just a little too loud, and Amren’s quips are just a little too sharp, and Rhys’s stories aren’t very interesting for once.

Nothing about his friends have changed, but somehow, Cassian feels different. Empty. He can’t stop thinking about what Nesta is doing right now.

He checks his phone under the table for the sixth time in three minutes, for what, he doesn’t know. Maybe she’s in trouble and needs his help. Maybe she’s having a bad night and wants to talk to him. Maybe she’s just bored and thinking about him.

None of this is true, evidently, because his phone remains dead silent.

“Cassian.” It’s Elain’s gentle voice that draws him out of his head. “What’s it like having a roommate for once? I know you and Nesta love being alone.”

He nearly jumps out of his skin. “Alone? No we don’t. Why would we love being alone together?”

Elain looks at him like he’s grown a new head. “I didn’t mean alone together. It’s just that you’ve always spent your time boarded up in that mountain cabin on your own, and before Nesta moved in, she wouldn’t leave her apartment even to see me.”

“I never thought of it that way,” Feyre butts in. She whirls to Cassian with her hands under her chin. “All this time I was wondering what you and Nesta living together would be like, and I didn’t even consider you guys avoiding each other.”

Cassian scoffs a laugh but doesn’t know how to respond. He just wants Feyre and Elain to stop poking at this raw, fresh thing in his life before his nerves get worse, so he turns to Amren and brings up the thing he knows will shut everyone down: work. “How much longer is Rhys gonna have you playing double agent at Adriatic?” She’s been acting as brand ambassador to the West Coast-based conglomerate for the past five months, playing nice while gathering information on Night Court Inc.’s biggest competitor.

Groans resound around the table, but Amren’s eyes brighten frightfully. “If he keeps me there any longer, I might end up staying for good.”

Rhysand smiles thinly. “Amren has a crush on their new CFO. If she keeps going on about Varian’s pretty face I might pull her out of Adriatic by the end of the year.”

Just as Cassian is about to convince himself to care, his phone vibrates in his hand. Everything tunes out as he sees Nesta’s name on the screen, attached to a new text. He clicks into it.

A picture of Nesta and her friends around a dinner table pops up, smiling and laughing. His heart catches in his throat at the image.

“What did we say about phones during dinner, Cassian?” Rhysand interrupts just then.

Cassian stands up quickly, stammering, “Uh, I just need to answer this call— it’s important.” Azriel is staring up at him like he’s lost his mind, but Cassian doesn’t notice or care as he rushes out of the room with his phone in a death grip, overcome.

Alone in a hallway bathroom, he lets himself look at the picture again, hungrily absorbing every detail he couldn’t catch the first time around: her face is flushed and her hair is down, wilder than usual. Her smile is so rarely genuine that it kills him a little just to see it; he doesn’t know whether to be relieved or pained that she’s having such a good time, that she isn’t missing him like he’s missing her. A sharp-faced girl that Cassian assumes is Emerie is holding the camera, likely having stolen Nesta’s phone to demand a picture, and the two women are surrounded by guys he doesn’t recognize. Except—

The face beside Nesta’s catches Cassian’s attention, and he clicks to zoom in. “Is that Lucien Vanserra?” he mutters.

Elain’s ex gets to hang out with Nesta while he doesn’t? This is fucked.

He doesn’t have a reason for his actions as he shoves his phone into his pocket and exits the bathroom. He just knows he needs to get out of here, away from this place that’s so far from Nesta’s heart.

His keys and coat hang near the front door, and he can hear Feyre’s voice from the dining room. “Cassian? Where are you—”

The door slams behind him before she can finish.

***

Being the only one who refused to get drunk off Jello shots, Eris offers to drive Nesta home for the night.

While Lucien is passed out in the backseat without a care in the world, Nesta is so awake she can feel her nerves buzzing. She knows as soon as she leaves this car, the bittersweet loneliness that comes after a party will set in, but for now…

What a night. She sighs and lets her head fall back against the seat, a small smile gracing her lips.

“Damn,” Eris lets out a low whistle as he pulls up to the mountain cabin. “This is your place?”

She lifts her head, realizing she’s home. “Ah. It’s only a temporary living situation,” she explains. “It’s my— friend’s place.”

“Friend or sugar daddy?” Eris smirks.

Nesta scowls, grabbing her stuff and pushing open the door to leave. It’s not Eris’s fault she’s unable to take a joke about Cassian, but that doesn’t change the sensitivity of the topic.

“Hey, wait—” he calls after her.

She pauses to look back at him. He hesitates, then says, “Good night.”

“Take care of your brother,” she directs. Stepping out of his fancy car, she shuts the door and raises a hand in goodbye, watching him pull away from the cabin.

Alone in the driveway, Nesta stands under the moonlight for a long moment, letting the chill seep into her bones. She’s dawdling.

She pauses again at the front door, her hand on the doorknob. The dreaded loneliness is already coming over her, crawling over her skin and making a home in the cage of her ribs.

A whole weekend without Cassian.

Maybe she should have asked Emerie if she could stay over for the night, but a part of her knows it would have been futile. Emerie can’t replace Cassian’s constant presence, no matter how much Nesta likes her.

It’s only three days. She steels herself and unlocks the door, prepared to be greeted by darkness and hollow silence.

The first thing she notices when she steps inside is the sound of crackling, followed by a warm glow from the living area. The lights are all off, but the fireplace is ablaze.

Nesta’s brows furrow, confused, but then she sees on the couch— “Cassian?”

***

a/n: i know justinian and isaac are names for side characters that sjm has used before but in this case they're completely different ocs.

taglist: @ladywitchling @sjm-things @thewayshedreamed @drielecarla @sensitiveillyrian @superspiritfestival @aliveahaahahafuck @cupcakey00 @sayosdreams @rainbowcheetah512 @claralady @thebluemartini @nessiantho @missing-merlin @duskandstarlight @lucy617 @sleeping-and-books @everything-that-i-love @cassianscool @awesomelena555 @julemmaes @wickedqueenoffantasy @poisonous-bloom @observationanxioustheorist @gisellefigue08 @courtofjurdan @theoverlyenthusiasticwriter @wolfiixxx @cass-nes @seashade @royaltykxx @illyrianundercover @queenestarcheron @monstrousloves-explodinggalaxies @humanexile @that-golden-lyre @agentsofsheilds @mercy-is-alive @cassiansbigwingspan @laylaameer01 @verypaleninja

#a favor #nessian #nesta archeron #cassian #ncssianwrites #nessian fic #nessian au

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sunmoonandeddie · 5 years

Text

marriage story

pairing: bucky barnes x reader

word count: 5,641

summary: Fake marrying Bucky was only supposed to be a means to an end.

prompt: college au, fake marriage au, and enemies to lovers

warnings: swearing, talk of past sexual abuse

a/n: This was written for @broadwayandnetflix for @bucky-smiles‘s Secret Santa! SURPRISE!!!! I’m so sorry I’m a day late, I just wanted to make sure it was as good as I could make it!! I really hope you enjoy!!!

You weren’t sure how you ended up staring at divorce papers.

Hell, you’d just graduated college three weeks ago and had miraculously landed your first job that was conducive to your career.

And now, you were a divorcée at the age of twenty-one.

Granted, your marriage had lasted much longer than a lot of those that happened when the two people were teenagers.

It had also been fake, but that’s beside the point.

You read over the divorce papers for the eightieth time since they’d arrived. Both of you took your individual things, no need for lawyers…

It had all seemed so simple when it first began. A means to an end.

You were eighteen and stupid. Desperate. You had no idea what the consequences would be.

You had no idea that you’d actually fall in love with your husband.

He’d needed to live off campus since he couldn’t afford the on campus housing. At a minimum of seven thousand dollars a school year, it was ridiculous. You couldn’t really afford it either, but the school had a rule that you couldn’t live off campus until your junior year, and the two of you were still second semester freshmen.

Then there was the issue with your FAFSA. You weren’t exactly on good terms with your parents. And by not on good terms, you meant that you didn’t speak to them. At all. Getting their tax information wasn’t going to happen, and it wasn’t like they were helping you pay for college.

But FAFSA wouldn’t let you fill it out as an independent student until you were twenty-one. Apparently, being cut off from your parents wasn’t enough of a ‘special circumstance’ to allow it.

But, there was one little thing that could fix all that.

Matrimony.

If you were married, you’d have to file independently. No questions asked about parents.

And the university would allow you to live off campus, too.

It was a perfect solution. A quick little trip to the courthouse.

Living together had seemed logical. A little two bedroom apartment was much cheaper than seven thousand dollars for nine months in a dorm room you had to share.

Plus, you had to keep up the illusion to the school and the government that you were married.

Outside of living together though, there wasn’t much needed. Each of you wore a fake ring when you went to your meetings with your advisor and your classes. It kept the rabid frat boys away from you, at least.

And then there were the scholarships. Turns out, there are scholarships specifically for married college kids, and your advisor thought you were just perfect for it because she’d never met such a wonderful couple.

It was all perfect. Until it wasn’t.

First off, you and Bucky didn’t even really like each other when all of this started. You only knew each other because you were best friends with Natasha, who was his best friend’s girlfriend. It had actually been the two of them that had gotten the idea in the first place.

“So, I’m sure you’re wondering why we gathered you here today,” Steve said, and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes.

“Steve, this is my room.”

This was not how you wanted to spend your Saturday night. You’d worked a double that day, from eight in the morning to ten that night.

The perks of working at a bar that did Mimosa Mornings on the weekends. The worst part was that you weren’t even allowed to take a shot or two to help you get through it since you were eighteen.

Stupid fucking law. If you could work in a bar, you should be able to drink to deal with the customers. Because fuck, they’re horrible.

But you made more than you’d be making at Buffalo Wild Wings, that’s for sure.

“Can we just get whatever this is over with?” Bucky asked from across the room. He definitely wasn’t keen to be stuck in a room with you for any longer than necessary. “I have work in the morning.”

“Same here,” you added, narrowing your eyes at the two who sat in front of you.

Natasha was your best friend and your roommate, but fuck were you ready to put out a ‘New Friends Wanted’ sign. You could take applications.

Requirement number one: Must not be dating the best friend of the most annoying prick in the world AKA Bucky Barnes.

Requirement number two: Must not be waiting to ambush you in your own dorm room with said prick.

“So, both of you are having issues with the university,” Nat said as she took out a bunch of papers. “The dorms are crazy expensive and you’re not allowed to live off campus. Also, FAFSA is ridiculous.”

“And we have a solution,” Steve said, a grin on his face. He was such a giver. He loved his friends more than anything in the world and would literally give anything for them. Seriously. You’d once watched him actually give the shirt off his back to Bucky when the latter had gotten drunk at a party and puked all over his.

He’d also gotten it on your shoes, and Bucky had just burped and said, “They look better now.”

The disgusting asshole.

“Well, spit it out,” you said, rubbing your temples. You were still in your uniform, a pair of cut off jean shorts and a tank top. Your hair smelled like cigarette smoke and someone’s beer that they spilled on you. “I’d like to go to sleep before sunrise, please.”

“You two could get married.”

Both you and Bucky stared at them like they’d grown two heads.

“I’m sorry… What the fuck did you just say?” You asked, standing up.

Natasha rushed to continue, still grinning. “If you two get married, the university will let you live off campus, and FAFSA will let you file as independent!”

“And it’s cheap! A marriage license only costs like… fifty bucks? Something like that!” Steve said.

Well… It wasn’t… a horrible idea, even if you and Bucky might end up killing each other before then.

“I don’t know...,” you said, the whole idea making you nervous. Marriage? Come on.

Bucky crossed his arms over his chest defensively. “I really don’t want to be married to her. We’d kill each other before we hit our six month anniversary,” he mocked, shooting a glare your way.

“It would only be until you graduate!” Natasha said. “And then, you two get divorced and it becomes a funny story to tell at parties!”

You shared a look across the room with the brunette. It would solve your problems…

“Fine.”

Turns out, getting married was a lot easier than you thought it would be. All four of you went to the courthouse that next Tuesday when all of you had a break in between classes.

You wore a sweatshirt and leggings, your ratty sneakers that were covered in mud along the bottom. Bucky wore jeans and a university hoodie.

Not exactly usual wedding attire.

Natasha, ever the optimist ever since she met Steve, had shoved a daisy she’d picked in your hair.

And an hour later, you’d walked out as Mrs. Barnes.

Wrapping your arms around yourself, you stood up from the couch and walked around the little place you’d called home since you were eighteen.

It had been quiet the first few months. You signed a lease on an apartment a few blocks from campus and had moved in right at the end of the school year, but he went home with Steve to Brooklyn, New York.

You were alone the entire summer except for the few weekends that Natasha managed to come visit. The only time you and Bucky spoke was when he texted you to let you know when he was moving in.

And that’s when the fighting had started.

As you stared at a picture of the two of you on the wall, you couldn’t help but laugh. In the photo, you two were sitting on the couch, holding a cake that Natasha and Steve had gotten you as a joke. HAPPY 2ND ANNIVERSARY! was written across it in bright blue icing.

It was a far cry from when you two had first moved in. Everything was an issue. You didn’t do this, he did that, the both of you wanted to watch different movies and he had brought the television but you’d brought the DVD player. Everything. Hell, you’d sleep on the bean bag in Natasha’s dorm some nights because even being in the same apartment as him was too much.

Eventually, there was compromise. An understanding grew between you and with that, a truce. You couldn’t keep living like you were.

You were pretty sure the war had finally, silently ended one late night in October. It was the weekend before Halloween, and you’d had the worst shift of your life.

Your keys clanged as you unlocked the front door, trying to open it as quietly as possible. Even from where you stood, you could see the clock above the stove that read 1:42 AM. You were supposed to be off at ten, but that clearly hadn’t happened. One of the other girls working had gotten sick and you were forced to cover the few hours she was supposed to work alone until close.

And to add onto that, you made less the entire weekend than you had last Friday night. You’d been hit on, groped, yelled at. Fuck. You just wanted to collapse in your bed.

“You’re home late.”

“Fuck!” You jumped in shock, your heart pounding in your chest. God. Your anxiety had just spiked and the exhaustion you’d been feeling was replaced with your fight or flight instinct.

Bucky was standing in the hallway entrance, brows furrowed. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.” He had on those gray sweats that he looked so good in…

No! Down girl! Bad!

It didn’t matter that he was hot. He was a total dick.

Though, lately he’d be rather kind. Nice. There’d been less fights in the past few weeks.

You cleared your throat, looking away from him. “Yeah, Wanda got sick, so I had to close.”

“There’s dinner in the microwave,” he said, shoving his hands in his pockets.

“Oh. Thank you.”

He nodded, before disappearing down the hall. It surprised you when you heard the bath start, but whatever. Whether or not he took baths was none of your business.

You were surprised to find a huge bowl of vegetable soup in the microwave. Huh. You’d just been talking to Natasha about how much you missed your mom’s homemade version.

Whatever. It wasn’t like you’d ever be having that again.

You let your head rest on the counter as you waited for the soup to heat up. Fuck. Your entire body ached.

“Hey, do you want epsom salt?” Bucky called out from the bathroom.

“Uh, what?” You said as you raised your head. Even just moving that little made your head pound.

He poked his head out of the doorway, his long hair pulled back in a bun. “For your bath? Do you want epsom salt?”

“My bath? What the hell are you talking about?” You asked as the microwave beeped.

Bucky leaned against the doorframe. “The bath that I’m currently running you. Do. You. Want. Epsom. Salts?”

There was a long pause as the two of you stared at each other. “Yeah,” you said finally, your voice coming out a lot smaller than you expected. “That would be nice.”

Once he’d disappeared back into the bathroom, you pulled out your phone and texted Nat.

To: Tasha

Why is Barnes acting weird?

From: Tasha

Which one of you?

Get it?

Cause you’re married?

To: Tasha

Yeah

I got it.

But he’s being fucking weird.

From: Tasha

How so?

To: Tasha

He made me dinner? At least, he poured vegetable soup from a can into a bowl and left it in the microwave.

And he’s running me a bath???

V V strange.

If I don’t text you tomorrow

It’s probably because he killed me

From: Tasha

Oh that

To: Tasha

What do you mean

“Oh that”????

NATASHA

ANSWER YOUR PHONE

From: Tasha

Sorry, was talking to Steve

He mentioned you’d been working a lot and how tired you were so I told him he should do something nice.

And I may have told him that you missed your mom’s vegetable soup.

So that probably explains that.

“Hey, it’s ready,” Bucky said as he came into the kitchen. “I’ve got some towels in the dryer going, so they’ll be all warm when you’re ready to get out.” He seemed so… laissez-faire about it. Like you two didn’t fight on a daily basis usually. He watched as you took a bite of the soup, his blue eyes zeroed in on you. “Do you like it?” He asked. “I tried following my ma’s recipe. Don’t know how well it went.”

You couldn’t help but moan around the spoon as the warm soup went down. Even reheated, it was amazing. “This is your mom’s recipe? It’s amazing.”

His cheeks flushed as he tried to hide a grin. “Thanks. I’ve missed her cooking.”

It was silent as you finished up the soup, the only sound being the spoon clanging against the bowl. It wasn’t until you set your dishes in the sink to wash the next day that he spoke again.

“Oh, I got you this,” he said as he pulled out a box. “I saw my advisor and he knows that we’re married and he mentioned that we still don’t have rings, so I just went and grabbed a ring from a thrift store.”

It was then that you noticed the simple silver band on his left ring finger, glinting in the low light.

“You didn’t have to do that,” you said as you took the box. But your breath was stolen from your lungs as you opened it, revealing a gorgeous diamond engagement ring with a matching diamond wedding band. “It’s… It’s beautiful… Thank you…”

“You’re welcome,” he said softly, rubbing the back of his neck. “Uh, you go ahead and get in the bath. I’ll bring you the towels when they’re done.”

As you sat in the bath, you couldn’t help but stare at the rings that now resided on your left hand. They glinted in the low light of the candles that had been placed in various places around the bathroom, most likely lit with Bucky’s lighter from the local smoke shop.

They were absolutely stunning.

Maybe… just maybe… this marriage wouldn’t be as bad as you first thought it would be.

You glanced over at the table as your phone buzzed, running to it. Maybe it’s Bucky…

But your hope was dashed as you realized it was Natasha calling you.

You hadn’t realized you’d been crying until a drop of water fell on the screen. Wiping your eyes, you brought it up to your ear. “Hey, Tasha! What’s up?” You couldn’t help but wince. You sounded like a fucking real estate agent. Perfect and peppy and… not you.

“Hey, I just wanted to call and see how you’re doing,” she whispered, as though she was trying to keep someone else from hearing. “Bucky got the divorce papers today and I figured that meant you did, too.”

Ah, another thing. He’d been staying at Steve and Natasha’s place since all of you had graduated, and the time had come for the divorce. He’d gotten all of his things out within two days, except for the hoodie you were currently cocooned in and your wedding rings.

“I know how much you love this place,” he’d said with a wry smile. “So you can have it in the divorce settlement.”

It had been a joke. The divorce settlement. Like you two had actually been in love and things just hadn’t worked out.

“You aren’t gonna change the Netflix password on me, right?” You asked as you stood in the doorway of Bucky’s room, arms crossed over your chest. “Because I’m still paying for half of it.”

Buck grinned at you as he taped the last box shut. “I don’t know… Might change it up on you. Have it all to myself. Then my suggested movies and shows won’t be so fucked up,” he teased.

You rolled your eyes, glaring at him. But there was no heat behind it. “We have separate profiles on there, you dumbass. So if Gossip Girl is on your suggested, that’s your fault.”

The laugh that erupted from his mouth made him throw his head back, his eyes crinkling at the corners.

Seeing Bucky Barnes laugh was one of the Seven Wonders of the World. It was better than the Great Pyramids of Giza, the Taj Mahal, and the Great Wall of China all rolled into one.

“We’re still gonna have Thursday night movies, right?” You asked, trying to ignore the way your voice cracked.

In the three years since you’d gotten married, Thursday night had become your sort of fake Date Night. You two would order takeout and watch movies until the both of you passed out of the couch. You both changed your availability at your jobs to let them know that you couldn’t work Thursdays. Not even Natasha and Steve were allowed to intrude. It was just your special night to hang out.

“I’ll bring the food. Do you want Thai or Mexican?” He asked, his features a little softer.

“I’ll text you what I want,” you said. Biting your lip, you toyed with the rings on your left hand. “I guess I should give you these back, huh?” You started to slip them off, but he stopped you.

“They’re yours,” he said, his hand closing over yours. His blue eyes shimmered in the light as you swallowed. “Keep them… as a reminder of your former husband.” The corner of his mouth twitched, but you couldn’t tell if he was going to smile or frown.

“I’m gonna miss you,” you said, suddenly surging forward to hug him. “Even though you’re super annoying.”

Bucky laughed as he wrapped his arms around you just as tight. “I’m gonna miss you, too.”

“How’s he doing?” You asked as you moved to what had formerly been Bucky’s room. It was now completely bare, except for a single gum wrapper on the floor. You sank down against the wall as you stared at it. Extra wintermint gum. Because he absolutely hated spearmint.

“About as well as you, I imagine,” she said slowly, choosing her words ever so carefully. “I don’t know. He went out for a walk a few minutes ago. But he locked himself in the guest room for hours after getting the papers.”

You let your head fall back against the wall, staring up at the ceiling as you tried to stop another onslaught of tears. “This is what we wanted,” you said, your voice cracking.

A pause. You could feel the tension even through the phone, a can of worms Natasha was about to open. “Is it? Is this what you wanted?”

“This was always the plan!” You retorted, the tears coming in a wave now. “We’d stay married until after we graduated and then we’d divorce. No drama, no court, no lawyers. Just a means to an end.”

You could hear her whispering to someone that you knew was Steve on the other end for a few seconds, the sound muffled. She’d probably covered the speaker. “Do you want me to come over?” She finally asked.

“No,” you said with a sigh, rubbing the hell of your palm against your eyes. “I just wanna… curl up in bed and watch cheesy movies and never come out.”

You didn’t understand. Why did this hurt so bad? He was just a friend. You two had never even kissed, for crying out loud. This wasn’t some fanfiction where you two fell into bed one drunken night and then woke up with feelings. This wasn’t an ‘Oh no, there’s only one bed’ type of deal with 100K+ words on AO3. You two were just friends. Really. There was no happy ending for the two of you waiting.

“Are you still gonna go to the Barnes’s Fourth of July party?” Natasha asked, her voice softer.

You pulled your knees up to your chest, resting your chin on your knee caps. “There’s no point. We’re not married anymore.”

“Sweetheart,” she chided. “You know he’d want you there. So would his family. You’re still a Barnes, even if you change your last name back.”

“I don’t know,” you said, chewing on your bottom lip. “I like the last name Barnes better. It’s not like I have any connection to my old last name. Maybe…” You swallowed. “Maybe I should keep it. It costs money to change it back, after all. It’s on my license now.”

Ah, yes. Because your license had expired while you were married and you’d had to get a new one.

“You’re a Barnes now and forever, hon,” she teased. You could hear her smile through the phone. “And you know Winifred would be pissed as hell if you didn’t go. You’re her daughter now just as much as Bucky is her son.”

God, the tears came on like a tsunami when you remembered the Barneses. George, Winifred, Becca, all of them. Especially Winifred. Sweet, sweet Winnie that had become your mom in the years since you’d met her.

“Bucky, I don’t know about this,” you said as you walked up the steps to his place. Or, rather, his parents’ place. “I should just go home.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” he scoffed as he searched for the right key. “I’m not letting you drive the way back just to spend Christmas alone.”

Truthfully, it was stupid to even suggest. Your apartment that you shared with him now was over eight hours away, and it was two days before Christmas Eve.

God, how the hell did you end up here? You’d been planning on spending it alone, just like you had Thanksgiving.

But when Bucky had come back from the break and realized that you hadn’t gone anywhere, it’d prompted him to ask why, which had then resulted in him insisting on you accompanying him to New York City for Christmas with his family.

“What if they don’t like me?” You asked, barely audible. In truth, you were terrified. This was your first holiday season that you were away from your parents. Thanksgiving had been strange, and you had certain it wasn’t going to get any better up until a few weeks ago.

Bucky stopped suddenly, looking at you with big blue eyes. “Sweetheart, they’re going to adore you,” he said, more sincere than he’d been since the two of you had gotten married. “How could they not?”

“You didn’t!”

“Yeah, well, you didn’t like me either. And then we got to know each other.”

He had a point.

You grumbled, staring down at your boots. They were still covered in snow.

“And besides, Ma hasn’t shut up about meeting you ever since she found out about you,” he muttered as he finally found the right key. “Dad said she’s been obsessively cleaning the house since she found out you were coming.”

As soon as the opened the door, you were hit with a wall of sound. A woman with the same shade of hair as Bucky rushed forward, trapping the six foot man in a hug. “YOU’RE HOME!”

“Winnie, come on, don’t suffocate the boy.” A man with Bucky’s eyes appeared, his hands shoved in his pockets. He was trying to appear nonchalant, but the second he was free of his mother’s grasp, he was dragging him into another hug. “I’ve missed you, son.”

“And you must be his wife!” Winifred Barnes said, suddenly turning on you.

“Ma, she has a name.”

“I know that!”

“Winnie–”

You were pulled into a hug, and you were suddenly overwhelmed with feelings. Maybe it was just the fact that you hadn’t hugged your own mother in so long, or maybe it was just because Winifred was that lovely of a person. Either way, you were tearing up as she hugged you tightly. You gave her your name as she pulled back, looking over your face.

“Oh, you’re even prettier than Jamie said!”

Your cheeks flushed as Bucky grumbled out a quiet “Ma…”

It was then that you were swept into the apartment, finding it bustling with people. You were then introduced to the rest of his family: his younger sister, Becca, who was going to be a senior in high school and was SO grateful to have a new sister, his aunts, his uncles, his parents. The entire apartment was bursting with people even days before the actual holiday.

It wasn’t until after dinner (which was absolutely delicious) that you were able to capture a quiet moment in the kitchen, helping Winifred wash dishes.

“Thank you for having me over,” you said, to break the silence. It wasn’t uncomfortable, surprisingly, you just felt like you needed to vocalize your thanks for what was probably the third time. “It means a lot.”

“Any friend of Jamie’s is a friend of ours,” she said as she rinsed off a plate. “And we’re so grateful for what you’re doing. He mentioned that it helps you, too, but… Our family can’t afford to pay for his housing. We can barely make his tuition.” She looked at you with crystal clear eyes that seemed to bore into your soul. “We’re so happy to have you.” She then paused, glancing over at the side of the sink, where you’d set your wedding rings just to make sure they didn’t slip off in the water. “You know, I was so happy when he asked for my ring. He’s always dreamed of giving it to a girl.”

“What?” You asked, looking at her in shock.

Winifred paused, her brows furrowed in a way that really reminded you of your husband. “Did he not tell you? The engagement ring is mine. But he saved up over the summer to buy a matching band for it.”

Your heart raced in your chest as you stared at the rings. Bucky had gotten his ma’s ring for you? But… why? You two were barely friends at this point.

“I would’ve been spending Christmas alone if it wasn’t for him inviting me,” you said, breaking her stare to look down at your soapy hands. “He found out I spent Thanksgiving at home and almost shit a brick.” You rushed to cover your mouth, to apologize, but she just snorted.

An easy smile tugged at her lips. “Holidays are a big thing for our family, and I guess we passed that down to Jamie. Everyone comes to town for about a week and we spend it drinking and shooting the shit, baking. We can’t afford much, so our gifts are usually just spending time together,” she said.

“It sounds nice,” you whispered as you scrubbed absentmindedly at a pan. “My family… even when I still talked to them, we were never big on holidays.” Winifred had gone quiet beside you. “It was always just us. We’d eat dinner together and sometimes I’d get a present, but mostly it was just spent like any other day.”

She took a deep breath, setting a plate on the drying rack. “What… happened? If you don’t mind me asking?”

“I… confronted my parents about the sexual abuse I went through as a kid,” you said slowly, swallowing around the lump that had suddenly formed in your throat. “My cousin… He, uh… He’s only a year and a half older than me. From the time I was… four or five, I think, to about twelve, he would… you know.” The kitchen felt deadly silent, and you were so glad that the rest of the Barnses, including Bucky, were in the living room. Even though he knew the basics of what had happened, you never told him details. “And my parents would punish me for it when he got caught. They blamed me. They’d ground me or spank me or… whatever.” You let out a weak laugh, trying to lighten the mood. “They didn’t really take it well. It doesn’t matter though. I’m fine.”

You were shocked when you were suddenly pulled into a tight hug. Winifred’s arms formed a cocoon around you and you could feel her tears on your face. She was only an inch or two taller than you. “That was not your fault,” she gasped out, holding you to her. “That was not your fault.”

Before you realized what was happening, you were clutching onto her as hot tears streamed down your cheeks.

You didn’t know how long she’d held you before she leaned back, wiping away your tears. Or at least, trying to before they were replaced with more. “You are not what he did to you, you hear me?” She asked, wiping at her own face. “You are always welcome here. We’re your family now.”

“What’s going on here?”

The both of you turned to see Bucky in the doorway, his sea blue eyes wide. He was holding a few extra plates that had been left behind.

“Nothing,” she said with a watery grin. “Just… talking.”

“Here,” he said as he walked over and put the dishes inside the sink filled with soapy water. “I’ll finish up with my wifey here, and you go clean up before dad freaks out because you’re crying.”

She barked out a laugh, nodding. “Fine. Fine. You know how he gets if I’m upset,” she said, kissing your forehead before leaving.

“So… You actually okay?” Bucky asked as he took over rinsing the dishes you washed.

The smile that found its way onto your lips was real, surprisingly, as you said, “Everything’s great, Jamie.”

And even though he let out a groan, he was smiling, too.

It was after that trip that you’d started calling him Jamie. It just… felt better rolling off your tongue than Bucky ever did. It was also when holidays in Brooklyn became a permanent thing. Anytime Bucky went home, so did you.

They were your family.

But now… Now what? Did you lose them like you lost your parents?

Granted, losing your parents wasn’t exactly the worst thing.

“Sweetheart? You there?” Natasha asked, bringing you back to the present.

“Yeah,” you said, shaking your head to clear out the cloudiness of your memories. “Yeah, I’m–” You broke off as you heard a knock at the door, a frown tugging at your lips. “Hold on, Tasha, I’ll call you back…” You hung onto your phone as you walked to the front door, peeking through the peephole.

Bucky?... What the fuck was he doing here?

You opened the door wide, shocked to find him crying. His eyes were puffy and red, his nose running. “Jamie? What’s wrong?” You reached forward to touch his shoulder, shoving your phone in your back pocket.

“Don’t sign those papers.”

“Wait… What?” Now you were even more confused. Your brows furrowed as you pushed his hair back from his face. God, he needed a haircut. Maybe you could… No. Not the focus right now.

He stepped toward, half inside the apartment that had been his, too, just two weeks before. His large, calloused hand caressed your face. “I don’t want to not be your husband,” he said, his voice cracking.

Your heart thundered inside your chest and you were half sure this was some kind of trick of your mind to soothe its aching. “What do you mean?”

“I want to make this work,” he said as he cupped your face in his hands. “I… I want to actually have Thursday night Date Nights and take you out and when we go home for the holidays, I want to kiss you under the mistletoe my ma always hangs up, and I want you to wear my ma’s ring. I want to be your husband. Please.”

You didn’t realize you were crying–yet again, fucking damn it–until he wiped them away. “I don’t want to not be your wife, either,” you said, your voice shaking. “I love you, I love you so much.”

His lips met yours in a blazing kiss, holding you closer than you thought possible. “I love you more,” he whispered against your lips. “I’m never letting you go.”

You dragged him inside, shutting the door before kissing him again. “You’re staying here. None of this bullshit of you staying with Tasha and Steve.”

“Gladly,” he chuckled, holding onto your waist. “But only if I get to sleep in your bed.”

“Only if we can shred those divorce papers.”

The moment was interrupted by his phone ringing, and you couldn’t help but giggle when you saw it was Winifred. He shot you an apologetic look as he answered it. “Hey, ma.”

She was speaking so loudly you could hear her clearly. “Well?! How did it go?! Did you ask her?!”

“Yes, I asked her,” he said slowly, squeezing your side. “She said yes. I’m with her now.”

Both of you flinched away as she screamed in excitement. “GIVE HER THE PHONE! GIVE HER THE PHONE!”

You smiled as you pressed it to your ear. “Hi, mom.”

“BABY! I’M SO HAPPY! NOW WE CAN HAVE A REAL WEDDING!” She was speaking at a hundred miles an hour. “Do you want a summer or fall wedding? I think it might be too late to do summer, but I’m sure we could scrounge something together!”

You giggled as Bucky stole kisses from you while she was speaking, distracting you.

“Sweetheart? You there?”

“A late summer wedding sounds perfect,” you said, unable to wipe the grin from your face. “Absolutely perfect.”

#cmmsecretsanta #bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky fic #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fanfiction

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mcwriting · 4 years

Text

The Marriage Project (8)

Hello, hello, hello! Here’s chapter 8 after a long break since chapter 7! If you haven’t all ready, make sure you go check out the prologue to Sweet Home Alabama once you’re done here, as I may post the first chap very soon!

Story Masterlist

Word Count: 2178

Warnings: Some language? I can’t think of anything else

% approximately the 3rd week of October %

You hadn’t really told anyone what you’d been doing Sunday, and especially left out the part where you were with Tom.

Once getting home the previous night, you’d quickly taken off your makeup and brushed your teeth before essentially passing out on your bed. You’d also snoozed your alarm enough times that you’d had to rush to school that morning, getting to class with only a minute to spare.

In the afternoon, your friends sat around a lunch table discussing how your weekends had gone.

“Mine was pretty boring. How about yours, y/n?” Caroline asked.

“It was fine. Mostly did homework. Oh, and I took some senior pictures yesterday, but that’s it.”

“Oh that’s why your hair is straight?” someone else asked.

“Yeah, I got home late and woke up late so I just tossed on some jeans this morning.”

“Where even were you? Your snap maps said you were at the lake,” Alexis stated.

To say that question made you nervous was an understatement. You didn’t want to give anything away so you tried to keep it vague.

“Oh, yeah. The photographer knew of a place out there we could go so I said yes.”

“Who was your photographer? I’ve been looking to get pictures done,” Caroline said.

Well, there goes ambiguity.

“Hah, well, Nikki Holland.”

“Isn’t that Tom’s mom?” Alexis asked, squinting at you. You sighed.

“Yes. I’ve been at their house a lot for the project and her whole career is photography so she asked me if I wanted her to do my pictures for free. I couldn’t turn that down.

“So that’s why you and Tom were at the same location yesterday!” Alexis exclaimed.

“What! Keep your voice down!”

“So it’s true? You and Tom took your senior pictures together? I was waiting until you’d admit why you were together.”

“Okay there are so many things I need to address but firstly, we did not take them together, we just did them at the same time. And secondly, since when do you have Tom on snap?”

Alexis rubbed the back of her neck and looked away. Everyone else looked surprised and kept quiet.

“Remember sophomore year when I went to that party while you were out of town? And I told you I made out with someone? Well….”

“ALEXIS!”

“I was drunk, okay? By the next day I realized how gross it was, but I kept him on snap so I could keep tabs for when we talked trash about him.”

You folded your arms across your chest and stared blankly across the table at your best friend.

“And you just didn’t think to tell me that you, I don’t know, made out with my mortal enemy and have had him on snap for the past 2 years?”

“I thought you’d be mad at me! Obviously it was the one time, and we’ve never sent each other a single snap. This was about you anyways and how you and Tom spent yesterday together. Where were you, actually?” Alexis asked, looking at you expectantly. You rolled your eyes.

“His grandparents have a lake house, okay? His mom planned the whole thing and the leaves were pretty colors, so it was whatever.”

“Hm, I guess so…” Alexis trailed, giving you one final look of “this conversation isn’t over” before someone brought up a different topic.

With volleyball regionals that upcoming weekend and Tom having an away game, you and he decided to work together that Thursday at his place.

You quickly rinsed off after practice and headed over to his house where he was waiting at the door.

“Took you awhile,” he commented as you came up the sidewalk.

“Yeah, sorry. I got caught talking to coach about this weekend. It also takes forever to get these leggings on right out of the shower,” you joked, gesturing down at your athletic pants.

You got to work pretty quickly as there was a lot to do as compared to normal. By the time you finished, it was almost dinnertime.

“Oh, I think my mom finished all those pictures if you want them. Let’s go find her,” Tom suggested, leading you downstairs.

Her and Dom were in the kitchen cooking together. It was sweet watching them interact.

“Hey, mom? Did you say you had that flash drive done?” Tom interrupted, causing both parents to turn.

“Yes! I’m glad you reminded me. Dom, hold down the fort while I go get that.”

She led you to her office, then dug around her desk until she found it, handing it to you.

“You know, dinner will be ready in probably 10 minutes. You’re free to eat with us tonight,” she offered.

“Are you sure? I wouldn’t want to impose.”

“You never impose on us! And absolutely, we always make more than enough food so the boys can take leftovers to school.”

Well if you’re sure… I’ll text my mom and make sure she doesn’t mind.”

She didn’t, so as you waited for dinner, you sat down on a living room couch, Tom taking a recliner nearby. From the corner of your eye you saw Paddy walk in the room and freeze when he saw you.

“Y/n! Lovely to see you on this fine evening,” he greeted, sitting tentatively on the other end of the couch. You held back a chuckle at his word choice.

“And you as well, sir. How was your day?” you asked, trying to get him out of his shell.

His eyes widened as he told you all about his school day. You prepared to reply when Dom came and announced the food was done.

You followed everyone to the dining room and stood watching, not wanting to accidentally take someone’s seat.

“Oh, you can sit here, y/n,” Paddy said, pulling out a seat for you in the middle of the table. You glanced to Tom, who was rolling his eyes.

“Thanks, Paddy. What a gentleman you are,” you complimented as he helped tuck in your chair. He took the seat on the left of you as Tom sat on your right. Directly across from you were Sam, then Harry and Dom on either side. Nikki took the head.

“Y/n, why don’t you get what you want first,” Nikki suggested, gesturing over the food. There was spaghetti, salad, and bread. You got only a little bit of each thing, trying to be polite.

“That’s all you want? I’m pretty sure I’ve seen you eat more on the bus to soccer games than that,” Tom commented. You raised your eyebrows at him and nudged his knee with yours.

“Thomas! Don’t be rude! Y/n, you’re free to however much or little you’d like. You can always go back for more later, too.”

Dinner went relatively smoothly aside from that, most of the conversation being centered on you as different family members wanted to know different things (Paddy especially as he’d trained his eyes on you almost the entire evening). For the most part, Tom was quiet except to crack a few jokes or answer something you asked him.

As everyone was finishing their meals, you offered to help clean up.

“Oh, no, don’t worry. It’s Tom’s job to do the dishes tonight,” Dom told you.

“I don’t mind helping him. I can dry if nothing else.”

After being reminded a few times that you shouldn't feel the need to, you went with Tom to the kitchen anyways, holding a towel.

“You really don’t have to help me, you know. You’re technically our guest,” he said as the sink filled with water.

“Seriously, I don’t mind. I have nothing better to do anyways since I finished my homework.”

You worked together pretty much silently, falling into a comfortable rhythm. As you set down the last plate, Tom spoke up.

“Hey y/n, think fast.”

“Wha- TOM!” you exclaimed, as he had shot water at you, making the front of your shirt wet. “Oh you are so dead for that!”

You jumped on his back, pressing your wet shirt against him, causing his own shirt to dampen. He thrashed around, the both of you laughing.

“What the hell is going on in- oh,” said Sam, who entered the room.

You both froze in place, you quickly sliding off Tom as Sam looked at you skeptically.

“Your brother just sprayed me with the faucet, so I was getting back at him,” you tried to convince him. It is what happened after all.

“Right... I was just coming to grab something from the drawer, so I’ll leave you all to it,” he said awkwardly as he dug around the drawer and quickly made his leave.

You and Tom both looked at each other awkwardly before bursting into laughter.

“You know you’re lucky this is a dark shirt,” you said after a moment.

“Am I though?”

“TOM!”

When you got home a little bit later, you decided to plug in your flash drive and look at all the pictures Nikki had taken. You were marveling at her work when your phone started buzzing. It was Alexis.

“Hey, what’s up?” you picked up, confused as to why she’d call on a Thursday night.

“Hey. I saw that you were home so I figured I was good to call. Are you alone?”

“Yes, and why do you need me alone?”

She paused.

“Look, y/n, I’m sorry for bringing that stuff up about Tom in front of the girls Monday, but, since I don’t know when I’ll be able to get you alone again, I need to ask you something.”

“Okay what is going on?” You’re scaring me a little.”

“I hate to be the one to ask this, because I know you and we came up with that whole revenge thing at the beginning of the semester but… do you… have feelings for Tom?”

You were taken aback at her question.

“What! Me have feelings for Tom? Are you crazy?”

She sighed.

“Well it’s just that, you two are always together now, your usual bickering has turned into normal banter, and you literally traveled to take pictures with him last weekend. It just seems like something else is there, and the whole school is starting to pick up on it.”

Ironically, you had frozen on a picture of you and Tom from Sunday, one of you standing in your sports uniforms back to back.

“Okay so maybe we’re kind of friends now, but that doesn’t mean I like him! And how many times do I have to say that the pictures were just at the same time?”

“Then explain to me why his mom’s website has multiple pictures of you two together?”

Your blood ran cold and stomach dropped.

“Wait, what?” you breathed, immediately going to pull up her page. Like Alexis said, a picture of the two of you posing was at the top of the home page. It was the same one you’d been looking at before. “Oh, no,” you whispered.

“Are you seeing it?” she asked.

You gulped.

“Yep. But, it’s not that bad, right? I mean she takes tons of sports pictures and we look super serious. It’s not like we’re standing with our arms wrapped around each other or anything.” you rationalized, half joking at the end of your sentence.

“You might want to scroll down, then…”

You went past a photo of just you on the dock railing in your jumpsuit to find one of Tom lifting you over his shoulder, but of you laughing.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” you muttered.

“Are you sure you’ve got nothing to tell me? I’ve had lots of guy friends and most of them don't do that to me.”

“Yes, Alexis, I’m sure. He was getting back at me for something and acted like he was gonna throw me in the lake. I didn’t realize Nikki took any pictures of it. I’ll ask Tom about it.”

“If you say so… I’ll believe you. But you do know you can tell me anything, right?”

“Of course I do, and I’m telling you right now that nothing has happened or will ever happen. We’re just friends, okay? Now I’ve got to go. See you tomorrow?” you finished.

“Okay, see you tomorrow,” she signed off, ending the call.

You felt another pit in your stomach thinking about how you’d lied to her. You definitely didn’t have feelings, but why didn’t you tell Alexis about that moment you’d had in his room a couple weeks back, or how you'd fallen asleep on his shoulder Sunday night, or even how you’d accidentally seen him naked?

Because she’d think there’s something there.

But there isn’t.

But..?

You shook the thoughts away as you texted Tom, asking him to take a glance at his mom’s website.

“Omg I have no idea why she used the third picture. I’ll see if she’ll change it” he answered.

You were glad he would save your asses like that, but felt a twinge of sadness for it to be replaced. You almost didn’t mind it being there.

A/N: another long awaited marriage project! I have been working so hard to get this out while going through rewrites and working on sweet home alabama, but hopefully this will hold y’all over for now. As always, thank you so much and feel free to hit up my asks any time!

Send a message or ask if you’d like to be added to my permanent or series taglists so I can verify you’ve been added!

Story tag list: @jackiehollanderr, @one-big-fangirl, @l0lmk, @primadonnasdream, @bookworm06, @thenoddingbunny-blog, @agentnataliahofferson, @spider-babe, @stxfxniexreads,

#The Marriage Project #tom holland #tom holland imagine #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland story #tom holland series #tom holland au #tom holland fanfic #tom holland fic #tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland x y/n

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dekalko-mania · 4 years

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Things That Lurk in the Dark (Pt. 1)

Amity changed the day the portal opened, in more ways than one.

....

As a young child, Danny had an immense fear of the dark, so severe that he had slept with his parents until they'd attached glowing stars to his ceiling and assured him there was nothing wrong. He'd assumed the problem was no longer there, pushed aside by the many other obstacles he'd faced in his past year of ghost-fighting.

He'd assumed wrong, it seemed, when he began to once again see the shadows in a sinister light.

Danny had first attributed it to his increasing paranoia, an overactive imagination fueled by being constantly alert. He was used to seeing things that were not there upon second glance, accustomed to jumping at any figure he saw from his peripheral vision. This was different, he knew, when he found himself knocking on Jazz's door more often, asking if he could sleep on her floor.

"This is the third night in a row, are you sure you're okay?"

His sister asked the question every night without fail, despite only ever receiving a lie as an answer. His nightmares were back, that was his response, knowing all too well that to get them he would have to have slept at all.

He lay awake that night, lulled into a rare sense of calm by Jazz's soft breaths. Maybe if he counted them, like one counted sheep, he could finally rest.

He planned on doing just that, when a familiar humming filled the room, coming from beside his sister's desk. He sat up, head snapping in the direction of the intrusion as tendrils of darkness formed into abstract shapes.

He stared, not daring to take a breath as he waited. Tonight, he would let it be for longer, observe first and then shoot after. As he watched, cold waves of terror creeping up his spine, the shadows formed into what looked like a door.

He had previously predicted they would become something outright threatening, a creature that lurked in pitch black, or a hand creeping out from beneath their wooden floors. This was somehow much worse, a gateway from who knows where, into their world.

Getting on all fours, he crawled forward, reaching out towards the handle. Before he could make contact, it began to jiggle, beginning as a gentle side to side, and rapidly shifting into an aggressive attempt to enter.

Without sparing a thought, he lit a fire on his palms, green and incredibly bright to ward the door away. That somehow always seemed to work, destroying whatever fragile arrangement had made its place near him.

Deciding that sleep was out of the picture, he shifted into a sitting position, keeping his eyes out for any more potential threats. The following morning, Jazz found him that way, both hands set ablaze and drooping eyes filled with apprehension.

....

It had been difficult explaining away Jazz’s worry, even more difficult to explain to Sam and Tucker why he was acting so strangely. He had grown as Phantom, realized that when facing his fears it was better to be strong and fight through them. If he let his guard down, people would be hurt.

Yet, somehow, after literally facing death, he found himself once again fighting against a childhood fear. It was humiliating, having to admit it, so he kept it hidden as best as he could.

"Daniel!"

Danny shot up, snatching the arm waving in front of him on instinct, earning a series of giggles from the class. He tightened his grip, realizing that the lights had been dimmed in the time he'd been nodding off. Already, in that short time frame, he was beginning to see the darkness curling into itself like smoke, caressing the walls in unnatural shades. Surely someone had to have noticed?

"What, he’s gonna fight the teacher now?"

"Loser."

Danny took a sharp intake of air, seeing who exactly the arm belonged to. With an apologetic expression, he released Mr. Lancer’s wrist, lowering his head and mustering the most sincere “sorry” he was capable of in his current state.

“It’s alright, I’ve faced worse at PTA meetings,” Lancer grunted, upset but with a kind tone. “I noticed you dozed off. I know educational movies aren’t preffered, but unless you pay attention, you’re going to fail the upcoming exam.”

“I’m sorry,” Danny repeated. “It’s just, the lighting here is making it hard to stay awake. Could we maybe flip a switch?”

Danny did his best to hide the tremor in his voice, all too aware that the gaze of Dash and co. were pinned onto him. Lancer, unaware, surveyed his student, face unreadable as he apparently didn’t like what he saw.

In a low mutter, he told Danny to grab his backpack and wait for him in his office. As someone who had been sent there countless times in the past, he needed no direction, quietly making his way out of the classroom with a mental groan at seeing Dash smirk in his direction.

Great, among his cryptic visions he would now have to deal with his long-time bully.

Danny leaned against the lockers, running his hand along them for stability in the all too quiet hallway. The humming was everywhere, within the walls, under the cracks in empty classrooms. Anywhere scarce of light, they always lingered, the vague figures, never tangible except for the doors. The longer he stared at one spot, the more Danny noticed them.

They had always been there, waiting for him to spot, knobs twisting as the unknown tried to worm themselves inside of him. They appeared to him as Fenton the most, weak human Fenton, rendered useless with limited access to his ghost powers. He’d found himself growing bitter of this half of him more as of late, wishing that he could always carry the confidence of Phantom, the fearlessness.

He pushed open the office door more aggressively than he’d intended, dumping himself onto a leather chair with a heavy sigh. He inspected the room in his wait for Lancer, fingers twitching with impatience. The man meant well, setting him aside from a situation that obviously made him uncomfortable, but he couldn’t find it within himself to appreciate it just yet.

Maybe he would be more grateful if the humming would stop. He clasped his hands over his ears, overwhelmed by the frustrating noise that never ceased to grate on his nerves. As if taunting him, the sound seemed to travel through the flimsy barrier his fingers provided, emanating from his right side.

Thump, thump, thump

He glanced over to the source, teeth clenching at the old storage cabinet that filled his vision. Its drawers rattled, forcing themselves open, before crashing closed.

The surreal qualities of Amity were everywhere, strongest in the darkest places. Objects disappearing in the blink of an eye, room layouts changing completely on a daily basis, all things that the residents should’ve noticed. But no one did, not even his family or closest friends.

He was alone, the only one who was aware of his bizarre surroundings, now stuck in a room with a seemingly haunted cabinet. Danny stood, shifting into a fighting position.

“Whoever you are, get out of there right now!”

The slamming stopped, relieving him for a minute, before restarting again with increasing vigor. It was like it was mocking him, the whole town was.

“Cut it out! I can’t deal with this crap anymore!” He readied a blast, uncaring if he would get detention for the rest of the year. “I’ll give you until three-”

The rattling came to an end, leaving the room quiet except for the ticking of a clock on the wall.

“I can’t believe that actually worked.” He relaxed his posture, though only by a margin as he’d learned to never underestimate his luck’s ability to run thin.

“Daniel?”

He jumped, realizing Lancer must’ve walked in while his student was glaring at the cabinet. He stuffed his hands into his pocket, attempting to seem unfazed.

“Was that you yelling? I could hear it from the hallway.”

“Um, yeah sorry. I thought there was a ghost.”

“Is that what it is?” Lancer closed the door, gesturing for him to sit down. “I wanted to talk to you about your behavior lately. You’ve been more taciturn than usual, perhaps it’s due to the increase in ghost activity?”

Huh, so there were some who had noticed something odd, even though it wasn’t to the full extent. Danny thought for a moment, testing the waters. Maybe Lancer saw more than he let on, noted the gradual changes to their city.

Quietly, uncertain with his teacher’s response, Danny spoke. “I’m fine. Things have just been a little odd lately, besides the ghosts.”

“Well, I have an hour until my next class. Perhaps you can explain it to me,” Lancer leaned forward, showing his undivided attention. “You’ve been doing well this semester, I don’t want us going back to square one.”

Danny thought back to his freshmen year, bombarded with the change of his lifetime, having absolutely no time for his assignments or anything else in between. It was an arduous effort adjusting to his new life, or half life, and he wasn’t keen on losing control of everything he’d worked so hard for.

“No, I don’t want to either. It’s the changes that are bothering me, I think. Amity.” He glanced over at Lancer’s face, eyeing any changes in expression.

“I don’t think I follow.” He looked slightly confused.

At this point, Danny would’ve usually given up, swept the issue under the rug and moved on with his day. He didn’t enjoy sharing his emotions, his burdens, but he just needed to know that there wasn’t something wrong with him, that someone else could see it too.

“Don’t you ever see...I don’t know, weird things that shouldn’t be happening? Maybe hear noise and see light under a door, but walk in and there’s nothing there?” He steeled himself, looking up to meet Lancer directly in the eye, hoping that the man saw that he was speaking with clarity. “Or have you ever been behind a locked door and felt that someone was trying to get in? Or the dark...that’s where it’s the worst. Do you see any of that?”

“I can’t say I do, Daniel.” Lancer frowned. “And if that was the case, I would say it was the ghosts.”

“But it’s not the ghosts. I know it’s not them.” His ghost sense would’ve gone off by now. “Entire buildings shift positions at night, there’s this dark fog everywhere. I know it sounds crazy-”

Lancer held up a hand. “I’ll have to stop you there. Nothing is ever too far fetched in this place, and I don’t like my students discrediting themselves before they get a chance to fully speak.” He paused, considering, before continuing with a grim tone. “Look, I know you won’t particularly like this answer, but do you think it possible you’re being haunted? It’s not unheard of for ghosts to become attached to a host here.”

“I don’t...” It wasn’t possible for ghosts to haunt other ghosts, was it?

“Before you decide, I suggest you talk to your parents. I know people your age don’t like to approach them for help, but they’re the biggest paranormal experts in town. You’ll find a solution there.”

Realizing that was the best response he was going to get, Danny slumped into his seat, disillusioned. “Alright, I’ll try bringing it up to them tonight.”

“Good, and in the meantime, you know my office hours. I’m always open to helping you catch up.”

....

Danny had absolutely no intention of approaching his parents about his findings, confronting them was his very last resort. He remembered the incident with Youngblud, how their first instinct was to scare the crazy out of him, and he wasn’t keen on repeating it.

Still, Lancer had unintentionally given him an idea, one he was surprised he hadn’t thought of before. If by any chance something was going on in Amity and his parents knew about it, they were sure to have kept data, information that the entire Fenton family was privy to. His parents were unconventional in the sense that their work was not kept secret from their children, all security activated by fingerprints or face recognition.

It was, he knew, done with the hope that their kids would become just as interested in the study of the paranormal as they were. It was also, what they did not know, partly responsible for contributing to his accident.

After double checking that his parents were not home, he snuck down to the lab, beelining his way to their work computer. As expected, it was easy as usual to log in, endless arrays of information at his disposal. To an untrained eye, his parent’s work was disorganized, even Vlad had said so. But he knew better, knew his way around their strangely named folders like he was reading the table of contents in a nonfiction novel.

Ghost profiles, weaponry charts, data on present, past, and future projects, new developments...there.

He clicked on the folder, apprehensive as it took a moment to load. Once it did, it took only a glance to tell that something was very, very wrong.

Unnatural levels of ectoplasm in the air, measurements at a high of-

Cognitive dissonance experienced by a reported 1 in 10 Amity citizens, signs of-

Missing teen, Ross Lucas, 16 years old, blonde hair, blue eyes, last seen in Amity Forest Reserve-

Polluted lake at Amity Central Park, no side effects reported, but water glows green-

Missing woman, 37 years old, brown hair, brown eyes, last seen in Amity Forest Reserve-

Reported disorientation, home layout changed. Upon further questioning, memory loss is reported, no reminder of filing the report-

Minor detail: green tint to sky at certain points of the day-

Missing man, 22 years old, brown hair, brown eyes, last seen in Amity Forest Reserve-

Poltergeist activity, Amity Police Station-

Missing teen, Jenny Lee, 15 years old-

Missing-

-last seen in Amity Forest Reserve

From above, Danny heard the telltale rattle of the front door opening, lumbering footsteps and daintier ones tapping along the tile.

Acting on impulse, Danny shut down the computer, turning invisible and keeping quiet in case his parents approached. Sure enough, he heard them nearing the lab after a minute of rustling. He stood, holding his breath, while the Fenton’s chatter got nearer as they appeared. He noted that his dad carried a briefcase, unusual for a man who preferred his casual attire, one with the Amity Police Department seal along the bottom corner.

After what he had seen, he could only stare at the case in apprehension.

“Let’s handle this before the kids are home, Jack. I don’t want to scare them.”

“Why can’t we tell them? It’s dangerous right now, Mads. Vladdie wouldn’t risk the safety of his god kids for this.”

His mom sighed, plopping onto the desk chair and booting up the computer. “I want to as well. Especially Danny, he’s always sneaking off somewhere. I can’t imagine him leaving, seeing his name among the victims.”

“We don’t have to ask him for permission...”

“You’re right, we don’t. The kids know how to keep quiet.” Maddie went silent, gesturing over for the case. Jack laid it on the table, unlocking it with a quick passcode and handing her a series of documents. She placed them beside her, pulling up a series of weaponry profiles.

“What I don’t understand,” she continued, “is why he was so adamant about them not knowing. Danny more than Jazz. What could possibly be the issue of keeping them safe?”

“Vladdie thinks ahead. Maybe he was worried they would try solving this themselves. Do you want me to ready the vault?” Upon his wife’s nod, Jack made his way over to the section of the wall behind Danny, waving a hand over a sensor to reveal hidden sliding metal doors. From behind them, hundreds of weapons resided, all of various types. He grabbed two, planting them beside Maddie. “Anyhow, this is one of those rare times I admit I disagree with him. Let’s tell them tonight.”

His wife chuckled, amused at the prospect of Jack disobeying his dear Vlad.

“That’s rare to hear.” She bit her lip, eyeing the sheet. “What a tragedy. There’s a group that’s gone missing, we haven’t had so many at one time.”

“That’s five people! What were they doing in there?”

“I don’t know, the forest is rumored to have more ghosts than usual. You know how teens are, maybe it was a dare. The question is, how is it possible that our devices state the victims are in the vicinity, but none of them have come out?”

“Perhaps they’re being held captive, or maybe, maybe they’ve become...”

Jack didn’t dare finish the sentence, but Danny knew what he meant to say. If something evil lurked within the reserve, a being that wouldn’t allow a human to live, it’s possible their spirit hadn’t moved on.

Trapped within its confines as a ghost.

“I’m holding onto hope that’s not the case. We’ll get them out Jack, we’ve got Amity’s biggest experts joining us in the raid tonight. Vlad himself will be there, it’ll be alright.”

Deciding he’d heard enough, Danny kicked off, uncaring of the clatter of beakers he left in his wake. There was someone he needed to see, a person who owed him an explanation and who deserved the sucker punch of their afterlife.

His parent’s were optimistic, and whatever raid they spoke of obviously included thorough planning, but if there was anything he’d learned about fighting the paranormal, it was that one was not sure if those on the front lines would make it out alive.

He couldn’t allow that, he had placed that responsibility onto himself, and he would be damned if someone else would have to bear it.

#Danny Phantom #dp fanfiction #danny phantom fanfiction #things that lurk in the dark #haven't posted any dp fics before lets hope this is alright so far lmao #im a slow writer so bare with me sorry in advance :')#my fics

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bangchanstudio · 4 years

Text

Never Have I Ever | Changbin (1/?)

pairing: seo changbin x fem! reader

genre: university au, awkward friends to ? something more?

tw: drinking games, p*rn, smoking, smut-ish/suggestive, dom!changbin tendencies ?

word count: 5.3k

ch.two

synopsis: your friends get together towards the end of fall semester to blow off steam before finals. and by blowing off steam that means getting blackout drunk at your place by playing stupid drinking games that everyone is too stubborn to stop when they know they should. normally, you’re the best at holding your liquor but not tonight, tonight your friends vowed to get you drunk with a game of never have I ever, collectively agreeing to go against you so you’ll finally be the drunk one doing dumb stuff. so, that’s exactly how you end up here sitting in the dark watching p*rn with your best friend’s friend.

note: i don’t know what the fuck i’m doing so here

“So party, your place, 9pm?” Hyunjin asked before unlacing his arm from yours and heading towards his next class. It was chilly and the loss of body heat from Jinnie made you wrap your coat tighter around yourself. “I’ll text the group chat to remind everyone!”

“Sure sounds great,” you called before heading in the opposite direction back to your apartment. It’s not like you had a choice when it came to these sort of arrangements. After all, the only one in your friend group with an apartment to themselves was you. This semester was kicking everyone's ass so maybe a party is exactly what everyone needed. Normally, parties were the last thing on your mind, but they were always pretty fun when it was just you and your friends. No weird smells at frat houses, with strangers, strange drinks, and stranger pick up lines.

After calling your best friend Chan, you both decided to meet at the market down the street from your apartment building to get drinks and snacks for that night. It was almost December but the cold made it feel as if we were already in the dead of winter, minus the snow. Your body welcomed the overly warm building as you spotted Chan waving for you by the cafe ready to go with a trolley.

“Mocha?” He offered stretching out his arm offering you the heavenly cup, which you so gratefully took and sipped at.

“Have I told you how amazing you are today?” You asked linking your arm with Chan’s as you made your way to the liquor isle.

He giggled looking away in that cute schoolboy way he always did when you complimented him. “Well, not today, particularly.”

“Well, you’re amazing Christopher Bang.” He gave you a knowing look at the use of his full name. Chan has been your best friend since high school. You had transferred from the states and he was the first one to invite you to his lunch table with his seven extremely loud, noisy, and obnoxious friends. You didn’t say a word the whole lunch period, and you thought maybe they wouldn’t invite you to sit with them again realizing how weird and quiet you were. But they did, they invited you again the next day and the day after and everyday after that. Before you realized it you couldn’t imagine your life without them.

They made you feel loved and cared for and like you actually had a family.

“What do you say?” Chan asked holding up a bottle of tequila in one hand and a bottle of vodka in the other.

“Well, we did vodka last time. Let’s do tequila!” You preferred tequila anyway, slutty though it may may be dubbed. “Let’s get the limes before we forget.”

Before long the trolley was filled with a couple of bottles of tequila, cheap booze and snacks. Mainly shit for nachos since Jinnie and Felix agreed to bring pizza. The cashier was ringing up your stuff rather slowly, the guy looked like he had just been dumped or something judging by the way he kept glancing between you and Chan with a salty look, you almost wanted to clarify that, “No, we’re not dating.”

But it was common for people to think you were. Some people even thought you were in an open relationship with a couple of your friends considering how clingy and inseparable you all were with each other. The thought still confused you but who cares what anyone else thought.

“Hey, (Y/N),” Chan called you out of your thoughts while handing his card to the cashier, “would it be okay if Changbin came over?”

Changbin. You hadn’t hung out with him since the start of summer at Seungmin’s house party. He had moved away after high school and you didn’t keep up with him the way the guys did. It had been over a year since you could say you were actually friends, not that there were any hard feelings. He just moved away and that was that. You were annoyed at the slight ache of your heart at the sound of his name. Don’t be stupid.

After a year he actually transferred to the same uni as the guys and you, but you didn’t speak more than a few words and small talk at lunch or whatever. This semester had been hard on everyone so it’s not like there was time to hang out and much less everyone at the same time, and anytime you did hang out with the guys, he was never there and vice versa. A small part of you wondered if he was avoiding you, but that was stupid. You weren’t important enough to be avoided.

Chan took note of your hesitation, he was the only one who knew how annoyed you were at the whole situation of Changbin leaving. As good as you were at holding your liquor you weren’t invincible and the only time your girl friend convinced you to go to the BTP open party first weekend of the semester he was the one you called to help you get home and along the way spilled your guts both emotionally and literally.

“It’s cool if you’re not okay with it, he doesn’t know about the kick back I was just—“

“No, it’s fine,” You said cutting Chan off and mustering up a fake smile, “Invite him. The more the merrier, right?”

Right?

You couldn’t have been more wrong.

It was getting close to midnight when Chan walked in. Your apartment was warm both from the booze and from the heater. Jinnie and Felix were cuddled together on the dark gray sofa, Minho was the only one actually eating the food everyone brought, Seungmin and Jeongin were playing video games and Jisung was sprawled on the floor with his head in your lap watching YouTube videos. Your hand stopped suddenly in his hair as you saw who walked in behind your best friend.

“Hey guys! Sorry we’re late,” Chan greeted before kicking his vans off at the entrance and making his way over, sitting on your other side as to not bother Jisung.

“Heyyy, look what the cat dragged in,” Hyunjin cooed cocking an eyebrow at Changbin before glancing at you. He pushed Felix to the side and went to fetch the tequila. “Now that everyone is here we can finally get this party started!”

You shifted nervously on your bum as Jisung sat up right giving space so Changbin could sit next to him, subconsciously you scooted so close to Chan you were almost on his lap.

“Sorry,” you mumbled, glancing sheepishly at him. “No it’s okay,” He said placing a hand on your knee. “Maybe this wasn’t a good idea.” “No, no, it’s okay, really!” You said, the boys were bickering amongst themselves over what drinking game we should start with, so no one was paying attention to you guys. You were grateful. “It’s not like we’re ex’s or anything.”

Chan rolled his eyes laughing, his dimples coming through. The sound made you relax, and smile.

All the while, Changbin was observing you without you even noticing. He didn’t mean to avoid you, he wasn’t even completely sure why he did that. Maybe it was the fear he felt of losing you when his parents announced they were moving away, afraid of losing what could be. Maybe it was how he saw the way you looked at Chan and figured he didn’t have a chance. Maybe it was the fact that he felt a certain way towards you that he couldn’t totally understand therefore wanted to avoid it at all costs. He still remembered the look on your face when he told you he was leaving.

Was it sadness he saw in your eyes? Even if it was, you covered it up quickly not wanting him to see. He wanted to see it, though.

“Okay listen up homosexuals!” Jinnie announced clapping his hands, “we’re going to start with something easy.” “Truth or dare!” Jisung yelled, startling you into a small jump, “Oh sorry, (Y/N).” You playfully shoved Ji’s shoulder, “Yeah truth or dare!” “No,” Hyunjin said exasperatedly, “That will come later, we’re starting with: Never Have I Ever.”

Everyone collectively groaned in protest.

It was a hard game to play because it was so easy to manipulate each other into getting drunk. There was little that was hidden between everyone, you guys were practically an open book with each other.

“Sounds fun to me!” Chan said giving a sly smirk. “Yeah same here,” Seungmin agreed a little too enthusiastically. “I’m good at this game.” Jeongin piped in, cutely raising his hand.

You puffed your cheeks out and furrowed your brows in cute frustration, “but I don’t wanna~” You whined crossing your arms.

“Too bad princess, it’s been decided.” Hyunjin said devilishly as he poured everyone's shot glass. You fidgeted it around annoyingly as your friends played Rock Paper Scissors to decided who would start the game. You were bad at rock, paper, scissors too so you didn’t bother joining in.

“Yes!” Felix shouted in triumph, “Okay let’s go! First one. Never have I ever… Kissed a stranger.”

“Oh come on!” Jisung protested, “That’s not fair, everyone has!” “Not me,” Felix said giving a smirk of satisfaction.

Everyone took a shot except Felix and Jeongin.

Minho went next, “Never have I ever… Sent someone a naughty picture.”

“What!!” “No way!” “Seriously?!”

Everyone was shouting their annoyance before taking another shot and refilling each others glasses. You mumbled a thanks to Chan for filling yours. Minho was the only one who didn’t shoot.

“Never have I ever…” Seungmin glanced your way before continuing, “Made out with the same sex.”

Your eyes widened and your cheeks flushed, not that it was something to be embarrassed about. It only happened once and she was hot and you were drunk and for god’s sake it was opening weekend! But… how did he know?

“Hey that’s discrimination,” Jinnie protested as he and Felix linked their shot arms around each other’s before drinking. “Lucky we’re okay with it.”

You stared at your glass biting your lip, Seungmin’s stare was burning holes in you, “aren’t you going to drink, (Y/N)?” He asked.

Everyone snapped to look at you, including Changbin who raised an eyebrow. His baseball hat hid most of his eyes, but you had memorized the way his face moved since the day you met him.

“Really?” “What, when? WITH WHO?” “You never told me,” Chan said laughing, covering his mouth with his hand in shock.

You licked your teeth and scrunched your face up trying not to curse Seungmin to hell before shooting your shot back and slamming the glass on the table without any salt or lime to follow.

“You’re such an ass.” You replied staring Seungmin down, whipping the bit of liquor off your chin.

He shrugged nonchalantly before nodding at Jeongin to continue which was unfair as he was still pretty innocent and everyone always had to drink to his never have I ever’s.

Changbin was next and you made eye contact with him for the first time in weeks. His dark eyes made your heart stop, they were unreadable as always and you felt exposed under his gaze. You quickly blinked away not wanting anyone to notice. “Never have I ever.. had a friend with benefits.”

“What?!” Jisung exlaimed, “Liar!” Changbin laughed shaking his head, “One night stands and friends with benefits are not the same.”

More groans were heard around as everyone took a shot, except you and Changbin.

“What? Really?” Jisung asked nudging you.

You blinked at him.

“What? Is it that surprising?” What did they take you for? “Like Changbin said, one night stands and friends with benefits are not the same thing.” You shrugged cheekily crossing your arms over your chest.

Jisung was next, “Never have I ever, given a lap dance.”

Boy were you on a roll, finally! “I haven’t!!” You shouted startling Jisung.

“No way!! What about opening night?!” Why was everyone trying to bring up dirt from opening night? It was starting to seem suspicious.

“What about opening night? You mean the pole dancing?” He nodded expectantly, “Pole dancing does not equal lap dance, oh innocent one.” You cooed pinching his cheeks.

“Okay my turn!!” You shouted gleefully, trying to think of something they’ve all done that you hadn’t. You hummed, musing, nibbling your lip, “Oh, I know! Never have I ever watched p*rn with someone else!”

“Why is that so oddly specific?” Chan asked taking his shot. “Because I know y’all are dirty,” You said watching as every single one of them took a shot.

Except one person.

Chan looked over at Changbin suspiciously, Changbin shrugged as if they were communicating telepathically, “Seriously? Never?”

“Nope, never." Changbin said before laughing.

“I guess we know a future dare.” Hyunjin said looking between you and Changbin with an evil grin.

You didn’t like the sound of that.

The game continued on for what seemed like forever and with each question your sanity slipped further and further away. Eventually the tequila was switched for regular booze as most of you were starting to crossover from tipsy to drunk.

Never Have I Ever: Slept nude - drink Skinny dipped - drink Hooked up with someone you just met - drink

“Okay okay okay, last one,” Chan stirred his accent getting thicker the more he drank, “Never have I ever… thought of someone else while having sex.”

Fuck. Me.

You glared at him, which all he did was return a stupid grin before hiccuping. Everyone was quiet looking to see who would be the one to drink. Chan really knew all of your dirty secrets and you tried to make a mental note of never telling him anything ever again, even though you knew that wouldn’t work out well.

As you held up the glass to your lips you made eye contact with him again. Changbin also drank to that. You paused for a moment, remembering your one night stand at the BTP party and how the guy was nice enough and cute enough, and buff enough… but he wasn’t enough. He wasn’t as good looking as Changbin, he wasn’t as hot or as toned as Changbin, his voice wasn’t as sexy as Changbin’s and his arms weren’t as sexy as Changbin’s, and your drunken ass told Chan that as he held your hair back on your bathroom floor as you puked up everything you had ever digested that day and cried to him about the guy not being Changbin.

What. The. Hell.

“Ohh~” Everyone cooed darkly looking between you too. “That’s kind of hot,” Jinnie said before deciding we were moving on to truth or dare.

“I need some fresh air,” You said, before grabbing your coat and rushing out the front door into the cold December air. There was a knot that had begun to form in your chest, you knew if you didn’t get out of there you would probably have a panic attack.

“Fuck you, Christopher Bang!” You shouted before climbing the stairs on the side of the building up to the rooftop. It was late and cold, so no one would be up there. No one was ever really up there, the sight wasn’t anything special. You could see campus from here and some hills in the distance. You pulled out a vape pen and sucked in a deep breath of menthol. The familiar feeling of smoke filling your lungs took the edge off. Not that it was something to be proud of, but we all had our vices.

You tensed as you heard footsteps coming up the stairs and cursed yourself for forgetting your pocket knife down in the apartment. One could never be too safe but assuming it was just Chan you started,

“You’re such an asshole Christopher Bang I’m never telling you anything ev—“ You deadpanned as you turned around to see Seo Changbin at the top of the stairs. Your eyes widened and you quickly hid your vape in the your jacket pocket. “I— I’m so sorry I thought you were Chan.”

He waved dismissively, “Can I… Can I join you?”

You nodded and for some reason you didn’t want anything more than to just disappear at that very moment.

“It’s…” you started, looking over the edge of the apartment building, “It’s nice to see you again. I mean we see each other on campus and stuff but I mean, you know, all together again.”

You bit your lip and squeezed your eyes shut annoyed with how stupid the words coming out of your mouth sounded. You were surprised when Changbin chuckled. He liked it when you got flustered.

“Yeah, it’s nice to see you too.” His hands were in his pockets but it seemed like they were clenched. “Chan mentioned you did well on your performance midterm.”

Chan talked about you with him? “Oh, that… yeah it was okay. I still need to do better.”

“You shouldn’t be so hard on yourself.” You met his gaze, “You’ve always been so hard on yourself.”

You didn’t know what to say to that, so you didn’t say anything at all. The silence drew on, sitting somewhere between awkward and comfortable silence. But at the same time, that’s how it always used to be. Changbin was never overtly clingy, at least not to you, and you never were to him always keeping a respectful distance. Not because he was mean but… you just assumed he didn’t want to cling to you.

“I’m sorry for not reaching out when you left.” You mumbled breaking the silence at last. “No, it’s okay.” He said, taking his hat off, ruffling his hair and putting it back on. You smiled at the gesture and he smiled back catching you staring, “What?”

“Nothing. I just missed this.” He nodded in agreement before suggesting you two go back inside before the guys started to worry.

You returned to a painful game of truth or dare. And by painful you meant extremely embarrassing you could literally die.

“I have to do what?!” You were standing, hands on hips, foot tapping impatiently waiting for someone to explain what happened while you went to pee out the alcohol.

“Just pick a shot glass and drink, whichever you want.” Chan said for the third time.

“Okay but what’s the catch? Do I die? Am I poised? Do I turn into a fucking pumpkin?”

“You have to sit on said persons lap.” Jinnie deadpanned.

“I… what?”

“Choose a glass and drink it and whoever poured that glass, you have to sit on their lap for twenty minutes.” Everyone seemed giddy with Hyunjin’s explanation but you could feel your cheeks burning at the small chance that you would end up picking his glass and— no, no, no, shut up there’s literally seven other glasses that means the odds are 1 out of 8.. that’s good.. right?

You whined and stomped over to the coffee table where the shot glasses were formed in a circle. Logically, they just poured them out and placed the glasses in front of them right? You smiled, grabbing the glass that was closet to Chan, convinced that it was his. If you had to do such a weird and uncomfortable thing, at least do it with your best friend, right?

You threw back the glass feeling the hot liquid drip down your throat. “There! Happy? So now I just sit here?” You asked pointing at Chan.

Seungmin shook his head mischievously, “No, you sit over there,” you followed his finger to Changbin who was seated on an accent chair next to the sofa, he was smirking at you and god he looked so hot with that black t-shirt and,

“Wait- what?! Why?” You asked in protest. “Weren’t you paying attention!” Jisung shouted standing up and pushing you over to Changbin. “We switched up the glasses dummy. We knew you’d just go for Chan’s glass so we switched them around.”

“Sorry baby girl, can’t save you this time.” Chan said apologetically.

Jisung pushed you down into Changbin’s lap and you could feel him tense up. The guys couldn’t stop laughing and Hyunjin even took a picture, probably to blackmail you with later.

“S-sorry.” You stammered, so low you weren’t sure Changbin heard it. To your surprise he wrapped his arms around your waist and arms and secured you in place. That only made everyone lose their shit once again. You were sure your cheeks would be stained permanently red from now on.

What you didn’t realize is that most of tonight was a set up. No thanks to Chan. He knew how you felt, and he knew how Changbin felt. Chan was tired of being the middle man when neither of you wanted to confront your feelings for each other, so that’s what led you here. The night continued and you felt that every minuted was an eternity.

You were extremely aware of everything going on at that moment, despite the alcohol that still lingered in your veins. You were painfully aware of Changbin’s arms and how his muscles flexed with even the smallest movement or shift from them, of how his breath seemed to become shallower with the time that passed, of how hot his hand felt on your skin between your jeans and top that rid up, though, it was only a graze, or of how you could have sworn you could feel his heart beating from his chest pressed against your back. Maybe that was your own? Since this was your dare and Changbin was also suffering for it, the only mercy the guys offered you two was a pass until the 20 minutes were over.

“Okay, (Y/N), time!” Felix called as his timer went off. You immediately tried yeeting yourself off of Changbin but his grip stopped you

“But what if I like you here?” He asked, whispering in your ear. You were certain no one else heard but your eyes would have given everything away if someone had looked your way. There was a knot in your throat and butterflies in your stomach and that definitely made you… hot. He released you after a second, which you gratefully and not so gracefully sat on the cool floor, thankful for the guys being distracted and bickering for once.

Chan offered you a glass of water, though, he was probably doing it to sober you up but you really just needed to cool off.

“Changbin, truth or dare?” Minho asked “Truth.” “Have you ever thought about sleeping with (Y/N)?”

You chocked on the water you were chugging spitting it all over the front of your shirt, Chan was by you in an instant rubbing your back and telling you to look up so it would pass.

“Damn, talk about getting straight to the point,” Felix mused.

Chan helped pat dry your face and shirt while you peaked at Changbin through the corner of your eyes dreading what was going to come out of his mouth. Luckily, you didn’t have to wait long for a response.

“Yeah, of course.”

Yeah, of course?! What was that suppose to mean?!

The younger boys celebrated and high fived each other, before turning to Minho. “You owe us 20 each.” Jeongin said, Minho rolled his eyes before taking out his wallet.

Why were you friends with these assholes again?

“(Y/N)” “What?” You flinched in response to Hyunjin’s voice. “Truth or dare?”

You weighed your options. You really didn’t want to say truth for fear of them asking you the same thing and there was no way you could admit to wanting to sleep with Seo Changbin.

“Dare.” The dark grin that spread across Jinnie’s face made you instantly regret your choice, though you were positive you would have regretted it either way.

“I dare you to watch a p*rn video with Changbin.”

And that is how you ended up here, at 2am, kind of drunk, locked in your own bedroom, in the dark, with the only light source being from your laptop that sat in the middle of your small bed. You hugged your knees to your chest, staring at P-Hub’s home page. Changbin was sitting cross legged next to you leaning back on his arm.

“So…” He started, awkwardly. “Why don’t you choose?” “Me? Why don’t you?” He exhaled rubbing the back of his neck. “I’ll probably choose something terrible. Don’t girls have better taste in adult videos anyway?” “What does that even mean?” You asked before jumping at the sound of someone pounding at the door.

“We don’t hear any video playing !!” It was Chan.

Mental note: kick his ass.

You sighed in defeat pulling the computer closer to you before typing in “morning sex” into the search bar.

“Really? Didn’t take you for a morning sex type of girl” Changbin mused. “I’m not, but that doesn’t mean it’s not cute to watch.” You replied scrolling through the videos looking for the least uncomfortable looking one. Maybe something vanilla will be less awkward. “So… you watch porn often?” He asked after a moment.

You stopped scrolling, closing your eyes and taking in a deep breath, “What do you care?” You turned to face him, but his face face was… so much closer than you were expecting. Your eyes widen slightly and your voice caught in your throat.

He was so… breathtaking. His dark eyes and soft skin unreadable… as always.

Clearing your throat you focus your attention back onto the screen. Though, you could feel Changbin’s eyes on you, observing you.

You finally settled on a video that looked innocent enough… well, as innocent as p*rn could be. The title was “Sensual morning s*x ended up with hard doggy.” Classy. The title didn’t even make sense but I guess that was budgeting for you.

Before you pressed play, you turned to face Changbin once again, trying not to linger on the thought of how his cologne smelled really… attractive. “No words.”

“No promises.” He replied before reaching over your lap and hitting the spacebar to play the video.

It started out slowly, with the guy’s hand going down her stomach. It’s quiet, though, he doesn’t waste any time on teasing and instead going straight into fingering her and palming her clit. It’s not long until you can hear her moans start to pick up at the sound of his fingers going in and out of her wet core. You couldn’t believe you were watching p*rn with Seo Changbin.

The girl in the video adjusts herself so that she can take the guys cock into her mouth while she’s on her back, him on his knees somewhere between letting her control his pleasure and him wanting to take over.

“Her boobs are pretty,” you muse, more so out of slight jealousy considering yours weren’t the biggest… they barely filled a b-cup.

“Aren’t you suppose to be here for the dick?” Changbin asked laughing a little louder than normal, that was the only thing that gave away his nerves.

You shrugged, “I guess it’s okay, it’s just when girls see things like this we tend to compare ourselves even though we don’t mean to.” What were you saying? Maybe you were still tipsier than you thought. Liquor had a way of bring out the truth in anyone.

“Your boobs are really nice.” You inhaled so quickly at Changbin’s compliment you started chocking again.

“How would you know that?” You asked hitting your chest to catch your breath.

“We went skinny dipping during the senior trip, remember?”

Oh, right. You did.

It was Hyunjin’s idea of course, and because it was Hyunjin’s idea Felix went too. Of course, Felix invited Chan who in turn invited Jisung, Changbin and you. The others didn’t want to wake up in the middle of the night to sneak out so it was just you guys. You snuck out of the cabins and trekked your way through the dark forest. That was the only time you ever held on so close to Changbin, gripping his arm, trying to keep up with their pace with the only light being from your phones to guide you.

Once you made it to the lake there was hidden booze and strip poker, followed by everyone jumping into the lake butt naked. You were all drunk so no one really remembers the skinny dipping part, and you almost forget it yourself.

“I.. almost forgot about that.” You said playing with the the hem of your shirt. “I don’t ever want to forget.” Changbin hummed. His eyes going back to the screen.

As much as you didn’t want to admit it even this vanilla video was turning you on. Or maybe it was the thought of Changbin being so close to you.

The guy finally put his dick in her and her moans were so pretty. The video was aesthetically pleasing, on a comfortable and wide couch. The sunlight was coming in through the blinds, it made her skin look so pretty. You didn’t realize earlier but the video is from his point of view so you could only make out his decent cock size and his hands on her thighs. Her moans started echoing around your room as he pounded into her, her boobs jiggling slightly at the pace. He held one of her legs up over his shoulder and massaged her boob with the other.

You didn’t realize how intently you were watching, biting your lip in anticipation of their sounds. Sounds really turned you on, probably more than watching did. You closed your eyes letting your imagination slip away little by little. You imagined being in that girls place. How long was it since you got laid?

“Fuck.” You muttered before realizing the word left your lips, your eyes springing open. “Sorry.”

Changbin wasn’t watching the screen anymore, you realized, he was watching you. The way your eyes had been so fixated on the screen, how you bit your lip so hard he thought you might bleed. The way you squeezed your eyes shut, your chest starting to rise and fall more shallow. He could tell you were imagining something. His eyes were dark with lust, his mind wondering how you would sound saying his name. Moaning from the pleasure that he was giving you.

His gaze made you shrink back into yourself, it made you wet and tremble. You tried to swallow the lump in your throat and say something, anything to break this fog that was starting to swallow you.

“Wh-what are you thinking about?” You stuttered out, the moans from the computer screen sounding so distant now and drowned out by how loud Changbin felt.

“I’m thinking of..” He started, placing an index finger on your lips, tracing them ever so slowly. His eyes, hungry. “How your pretty lips would look around my cock.”

You were taken aback by his bold words, but there was no denying he was stoking a fire that was starting to form at the pit of your stomach. He slipped a finger into your mouth, you whimpered at the sensation, wrapping your tongue around his finger and closing your eyes, listening as his breathing deepened.

“Damn, (Y/N), I really didn’t take you for a slut.” He stuck a second finger into your mouth, making you moan slightly. “Look at me when I talk to you.”

He grabbed your jaw with his free hand, the sudden movement making you fall onto your back and him on top. His hat fell to the side and his messy hair made him look even more dangerous. The sudden movement made him snap out of his daze and sit up.

“Fuck, (Y/N), I’m so sorry that was uncalled for.” Changbin got to his feet, securing his hat firmly back on his head. “We finished the video, I’m going to head out first.”

Changbin rushed out and you followed soon after composing yourself only to find an empty and dark apartment.

#seo changbin #changbin #changbin x reader #changbin scenarios #seo changbin scenarios #skz #skz scenarios #skz x reader #smut #changbin smut #skz smut #changbin imagines #seo changbin imagines #myfic #nhie1 #nhie

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an-absolute-travesty · 4 years

Text

Secret Santa fic!

Heya @all-eternity it was me all along! I hope you enjoy this :) very much looking foward to actually being able to follow you after this without looking sketchy lmao

Also shoutout to my lovely beta reader @keepersandqueens as if I don’t talk about Salas enough here lol

Warnings: underage drinking, drinking in general, hangover, drugs/medication mention (not abused, basic over the counter stuff dw), mentions of vomit (not described)

Pairings: Kam, background marelinh, ex titz

About: Kam coffee shop college au

Word count: 5,205

Tag list (tell me if you want to be added or removed): @cadence-talle @ruewen-and-rising @lemontarto @a-lonely-tatertot @clearlyvacksen @percabetn @sewersewersewercouch @everyonehasthoughts @imaramennoodle @enbies-and-felonies @blxckh0les42 @rainbowtay-11 @callas-starkflower-stew @impostertamsong @appalyneinstitute1 @stars-and-splendor @anna-without-an-e @mistythegenderqueermess @we-have-no-bananas-today @we-wont-dissapear @jadenightthewriter

Tam stumbled into his first 8 am class, anxiety making his heart feel like it was pounding out of his chest and stomach doing backflips.

If he could survive bouncing between foster homes, a short stint at juvie, and worst of all high school, he could survive college.

Well he thought he could until he saw a familiar person right next to the only available chair in the room.

God fucking damn it.

"Hey Bangs Boy!" Keefe waved him down, causing a scene. Tam had no option but to sit beside him, both because of the lack of chairs and the fact that everyone was now staring at him.

Not a great start.

"What a coincidence! I notice you still haven't taken my suggestions on your hair, I'm telling ya' you'd get all the girls and or guys and nonbinary pals with a man bun." Keefe looked smug at the fact he'd be able to taunt Tam for another semester, minimum. Tam was already making a mental note to check when he could swap out of classes.

"Keefe, if I knew you were going here I would've just gotten myself back in jail, oh wait, you were the one who got me in there in the first place." Tam shot him a look, praying that he'd suddenly develop superpowers and shoot lasers from his eyes.

"Hey, just because I came up with the idea...and helped with some of the execution, doesn't mean I'm responsible for you trashing your parents house. Besides, you were only in there for like 3 days max before you got out," Keefe said, shrugging as if 3 days in jail was no biggie.

"Most peaceful 3 days of my life," Tam sneered, turning back to the front of the room as the professor walked in.

"Good morning class!" the prof turned to the white board, writing his name. "I am Dr. Harding," he tapped it for emphasis.

The class was silent.

"And you say good mor..."

"Good morning Dr. Harding," The class said in unison, they all sounded tired and bored.

This wasn't going to be fun.

~*~

"Grande ice vanilla latte for...Hen-are-y?"

The man shot Keefe a look as he grabbed his coffee.

"Henry." He dropped a tip in the jar, fifty cents. How generous.

He had come in before, and never left good tips. Keefe made it a game to pronounce the names of anyone who wasn't a college student and left bad tips wrong, no matter how much they came in. It was a wonder he hadn't been fired yet.

As he turned preparing another drink, the bell at the top of the door rang. He ignored it at first until he heard a quiet, "Fuck," come from behind.

"Bangs boy!"

"Why are you here?"

"I work here obviously," Keefe walked up to the counter. "Now, what'll it be?"

Tam sighed. "Iced caramel macchiato with two extra shots of espresso."

"Size?"

"Venti."

Keefe whistled thinking about how much caffeine that was as he wrote down "Bangs Boy" on the cup.

"Alright, that'll be 5.75, may I ask why the insane amount of coffee? I believe I remember you saying caffeine makes you anxious in high school."

"Yes, but it also helps me focus, and I have a quiz tomorrow I haven't studied for."

"Fair enough," Keefe said, going to prepare the drink. "It'll be ready in five."

Tam nodded, walking off to the side and scrolling on his phone. Keefe made the drink, occasionally sneaking looks over at Tam. He didn't seem to notice, thank God.

Soon after, they finished the transaction.

"See you at class," Keefe said, he was trying to be genuine, but it came across more taunting.

Tam grimaced, muttered "Thanks for the coffee," and walked out the door.

~*~

The class fell silent as a disheveled Dr. Harding walked in, a pack of gatorade in one hand and bottle of tylenol in the other. He popped one as he sat down.

"Hello class it seems today I have the worst headache imaginable, just give me about 5 minutes of silence and we will go over your assignments."

Keefe leaned over to Tam's desk.

"Well, we know what he got into last night," he whispered. "Heard the bar on the corner of 5th was giving out two for ones for professors."

"Isn't that place run by the alumni?"

"Exactly. Gotta thank Alvar tomorrow, Fitz said it was his idea."

"Wait Fitz goes here too? Why did I not-"

"Boys!" Dr. Harding practically yelled. "I am tired of the racket." He put his face in his hands where his elbows rested on the desk, bald spot showing to the world.

"We were whispering!" Keefe made a 'what the hell' sort of gesture. Tam glared at him, hoping he could communicate 'I will kill you myself if you say another word' with just his eyes.

"Sencen, do I look like I care?"

Keefe winced a bit at the use of his last name. That was something Tam could understand.

"Look, boys," Dr. Harding stood up and turned to the chalkboard, writing something down. "If you all like talking so much, you'll love this next project."

He walked to the side, revealing the board, that read '10 page essay, due the 25th'

"With the person next to you, you'll be writing a 10 page essay on um...the importance of keeping your oil changed in your car. You'll then present it to the class. It's worth 25 points."

A student raised their hand.

"Luka?"

"Sir, I thought this was a psychology course?"

"It is. You are all excused."

With that, he left the room with his tylenol and gatorade in his arms. The students glared at Keefe and Tam as they all got up, muttering amongst themselves about the pure bullshittery of it all.

"So..." Keefe said, slowly standing. "Does the library tomorrow at 3 work? I have work until then, so it can't be any earlier."

"Yeah, sure." Tam promptly walked out of the classroom as fast as possible, he didn't know why but his anxiety was spiking. He tried to tell himself it was just because he was a useless gay that didn't know jackshit about cars, yeah, surely that was it.

Just a useless gay.

~*~

Tam waited at a table in the library, it was 3:05, Keefe was late.

He didn't know what else he expected from him, he always seemed to do stuff like this. At the same time, Tam didn't have the energy to be particularly mad at him. This was going to be the stupidest essay ever written in the history of man, might as well put it off.

The library door slammed open, and in came Keefe. He balanced a large stack of papers and books along with four drinks. He stumbled over to Tam and practically threw them down on the table.

"Sorry I'm late, I thought it would be nice to, like, get you a coffee, but I didn't know how much caffeine you wanted, so I got one decaf caramel macchiato, one normal, and one with an extra shot, and also hot chocolate for me."

He sat down in the chair by Tam, as if getting three different coffees for someone you were forced to do a project with was totally normal.

"Um...thanks, I-I can pay you back-"

"Don't worry about it." Keefe turned to him and smiled, bright and friendly. Tam was frozen. "Okay, now it's car time." Keefe turned back to the desk.

"Yeah."

They were silent for a while as they researched, Keefe going through his piles of papers and books and Tam on his laptop like any sane person would.

Tam finally worked up the nerve to talk.

"So um...this is out of nowhere, but I think you mentioned Fitz went here?"

"Oh, yeah." Keefe put down the absurdly large textbook that was set up in front of him. "He's my roommate, he uh thought it would be best not to tell you after everything, I guess."

"That's fine," Tam shrugged like he didn't care. "I'm over it."

He was, really. They only dated like 2 weeks, sure it ended with a...pretty big fight after Fitz claimed he wouldn't be able to date someone who had gone to jail and Tam reminded him it was his best friend that got him in there in the first place, but he was still over it. There was still something bothering him, nothing to do with Fitz himself but...something. He just couldn't put his finger on what.

"Alright, I'll take your word." Keefe shrugged, setting his giant book back up in front of him.

Tam felt the need to start talking again, but didn't. They were mostly silent for the next 40 minutes or so, just researching and the occasional word exchanged between them.

Keefe checked his phone.

"Shit," He got up. "Work emergency, I gotta go. Same time tomorrow?"

"Yeah that works."

"Chill, see ya' later."

"Bye."

Keefe waved (with a wide grin Tam would've called idiotic in high school) as he went out the door.

Tam found himself with a smile on his own face, he quickly stopped, hoping no one saw.

~*~

Keefe hurried into work, pulling his apron on as he saw the absurdly long line and a panicked Marella frantically making coffees behind the counter. She sighed with relief when she saw him.

"Thank God," She said as he stepped behind the counter with her. "There was a scheduling error, Forkle's useless at that stuff."

Mr. Forkle, their well-meaning but often mistaken manager, was out of town at the moment. The fate of the Starbucks rested on two college kids, what could go wrong.

And so they went, Keefe taking orders and Marella fulfilling them until there were no more to serve.

Marella, quite literally, threw in a towel she had wiped her face with. Promptly going to the back, presumably for her break. Keefe followed her.

"Alright, I think you can probably go back to whatever you were doing before this now if you'd like," said Marella, inspecting the small braids in her hair in the nearest shiny surface.

"Nah I was just doing a project with Tam for Harding's stupid class, he's probably left by now, I might as well rack up some overtime."

Marella turned back at him, clearly caught off guard at the name.

"Tam? As in my-girlfriend's-brother Tam? As in you-had-a-massive-crush-on-in-highschool Tam? As in dated-Fitz Tam? As in you-got-him-in-jail-"

"Yes! Yes! Why does everyone remind me of that, it was one time."

"When you get someone in jail, people tend to remember," Marella went silent for a second, thinking, before looking Keefe in the eye. "Wow, that must be awkward as hell, I mean seriously, if I were you I'd straight up file a restraining order just to avoid him. Maybe move to another country. I hear Estonia is lovely this time of year."

"Eh, it's not as bad as it seems. I mean it was awful at first, mostly because I tried to resume right where we left it on the taunting front, but I think it's ok now."

"Hm. Well good luck with that," Marella turned back to go to the front, but Keefe grabbed her arm to stop her.

"Uh, actually I need your advice on something. It has to do with Tam."

"Shoot."

"Well I was thinking of maybe, I don't know, asking him out or something? Look, yeah, it's an awful idea but is it 'he never wants to talk to me again' awful or 'he attempts to strangle me' awful?"

Marella looked him up and down, eyes uncomfortably cold, as usual.

"I mean, no hetero, but despite your annoying qualities you're a decent looking guy. Plus Tam's, like, super anxious according to Linh, so maybe he'll be too awkward to say no. You can probably squeeze at least one date in there."

"Wow, thanks Mare," Keefe mumbled, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Yes, I try. Also don't call me Mare."

"Alright Ella!" Keefe called as the front door's bell rang, signalling a new customer. Marella went off to take care of it, unable to respond she growled back at him.

~*~

Tap tap tap tap tap.

Tam glared from across the table.

Tap tap tap tap tap tap.

"Why do you keep doing that?"

Keefe looked up, muttered a simple "Fidgety" and went right back to it, tapping his pen against the table. Tam said nothing more.

Keefe had been quiet for this entire meeting, something highly unusual for him.

"Ok, seriously dude, what's up? I haven't seen you this quiet literally ever."

He only seemed to get more fidgety at this question, his bouncing leg shaking the library table.

"I...um..." he looked down, running a hand through his hair "I have a test I need to cram for and no one to study with and keep me accountable. Y'know, ADHD issues."

Tam didn't overthink for once in his life but the moment the sentence was out of his mouth he regretted it.

"I have a test too, maybe we could study together?"

Keefe smiled his annoyingly charming smile.

"Sounds good."

"Good."

Tam quickly looked back down at his computer, trying to look like he was still doing car research when in actuality he was processing he just actively offered to spend more time with Keefe Sencen.

If Linh found out about this he'd never live it down.

He didn't think he cared.

~*~

Dr. Harding walked through the classroom door, clearly much less hungover than his last appearance.

The students waited, would they get an apology? Any sort of remorse?

"Alright, who wants to read first?"

Apparently not.

Keefe raised his hand with too much confidence for what their essay looked like. Tam gave him a confused look. He had his scheming face on, never good.

"Mr. Sencen!" Keefe winced at the use of his last name by the doctor. "What an amazing start, it's only appropriate. One of you boys come up and present."

Tam gave Keefe a look of 'do you want me to do it?' Keefe just smiled and got up from his chair. This would either be really good or really, really bad. Tam was all too familiar with the scheme face.

"Doc, I did depart from the source material a bit here, hope you don't mind. And I use 'I' because Tam had no involvement in this, he deserves full points for his essay."

Keefe cleared his throat, the room was so silent you could hear a pin drop.

"Doctor Harding deserves to get fired: an essay. (And it's only been a week!) Paragraph one, his drinking problem-"

"Sencen! Back to your seat now. I will see you after class, or I will not see you in my next class, understand?"

Keefe gave a thumbs up as he sat back on his chair with a thud.

A few minutes later, in the middle of another student's essay, he passed Tam a note with his loopy handwriting.

"The amount of comebacks I had for 'see me after class' is absurd but if I get kicked out there's no way Elwin is helping me pay tuition a second time."

Tam tried not to smile, certainly failing, as he wrote his response.

"Yeah I think the time you talked back to Miss Cadence she wanted to expel you. Lucky Principal Alina had a thing for pseudo-dad Alden."

"Oh God I haven't talked to him in a whiiiiiile."

"?"

"You haven't heard? Yeah, he sorta found out like ALL his kids were ell gee bee tees and freaked out. Della found herself a new gf though!"

"Sounds like a lovely extra punch in the gut for a queerphobe."

"Yep. Honestly I recommend looking through his Facebook sometime. Just a million rants about how the gays destroy everything, great entertainment."

"Duly noted."

At that point it seemed like the doctor started to take notice of their note passing, and they stopped quickly. Tam wouldn't be surprised if he did the whole high school read in front of the class thing with the way he had been acting so far.

Tam was 100% sure tenure was the only thing keeping this guy's job intact. Apparently being a drunk asshole wasn't near enough to get a person out of their position. He tried to ignore the professor's annoyingly smug face for the rest of the class.

~*~

Keefe sat in his usual spot at the library, Tam sitting across from him, his brown eyes dancing across the textbook page and lips mumbling along the words. He didn't have much to do, often finding himself just staring at Tam, quickly looking away if he seemed to notice.

Eventually he sighed, sitting back.

"Ugh, this test is in a week and I have so much other crap to do, I'll never get this all memorized by Friday."

Keefe silently thanked his brain for managing to get around the having to study thing. Yay, photographic memory!

"Oh, uh, well I'm free to study more tomorrow if that would help? We could do, like, flashcards or something."

Tam seemed to repress a smile. He did that a lot. Keefe always noticed.

"That's okay, I'm sure you have better things to do. The Starbucks is always pretty packed."

"Eh, sometimes you have to get away from Marella. She's mean to me."

"Not just you, once she told me if I ever made fun of Linh's cat's name again she'd make me cut off my own bangs."

Keefe nodded sagely. "The shorter you are the closer to hell. That's why you're worse than her."

"Hey!"

Tam flicked a stray rubber band at Keefe.

"I'm at least 2 inches taller than Marella...we measured."

Keefe thought up about 12 inappropriate jokes he couldn't make before flicking the rubber band back.

"Two inches only counts in roller coasters, none of which you can ride."

Tam stuck his tongue out before returning to his studies. Unlike Tam, Keefe didn't hide his smile.

~*~

Tam strolled into the Starbucks that Friday morning, no longer surprised to see Keefe working the counter. He could barely hold still in line as he thought about the amount of cramming he'd have to do in the next few hours.

When he reached the counter, Keefe said nothing, just busily worked making a drink.

He stuck it right out at Tam.

"One venti iced caramel macchiato with 2 extra shots of espresso because you have a test today in political science and still haven't studied everything and also a muffin because you probably haven't eaten today. On the house. Good luck with the studying."

Tam froze.

"I- um- th-thaks. Y-you too...sport."

Oh, you fucking idiot.

He quickly scurried out of the Starbucks with drink and muffin in hand. Wow, he had screwed that up.

But...

Keefe...

He...

He remembered his order and that he had a test and that he forgot to eat when he was stressed holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit-

Okay, deep breaths Tam, you got this. You can totally handle a frustratingly cute guy showing care for you this is fine...

Not fine, not fine, gotta tell Linh.

He called Linh with no forewarning. Despite the fact that she was currently across the country at a different university, and it was about 3 am for her, she picked up. He barely let her get out a groggy "Hello?" before explaining everything. She only seemed to think a moment before responding.

"Hm. Well it's good to know that college is going good for you. Do you need advice or comfort?"

"Yes."

"Well, first of all, everything's gonna be okay. And I know that doesn't help much but just try to remember we're eighteen, and it's not the end of the world. Second of all, try to ask him out or something. It doesn't have to be framed as a date, like Marella and I got together on a walk in the park, seriously it can be anything."

"Thanks Linh."

"No problem, also can you hug Marella for me?"

"If she doesn't try to kill me first, yes."

"Nice. Okay go do what you gotta do, also don't wake me up at 3 am again or else I'll sic Purryfins on you, I had just gone to bed."

With that she hung up and Tam continued on his way, still trying to not completely freak out.

~*~

Keefe stared blankly as Tam walked right out of the door. Marella appeared by his arm.

"So, how'd it go?"

"Well, he called me 'sport'."

Marella inhaled through her teeth.

"Yikes. Comfort, advice, or distraction?"

"Distraction, please." Keefe replied, absent-mindedly preparing a cup for the next customer.

"Uh, well I meant to ask you what ended up happening with that ass of a teacher, but I got a bit distracted at your attempt to woo Tam-"

"Hey I said distraction not reminder. But basically I just got a slap on the wrist because, and I quote, 'Your father is Cassius Sencen! He wrote half the books we use in this class, I'm sure he can straighten you out!'"

"There's absolutely nothing papa Sencen could do to make you straight, I'm pretty sure he tried that, and it obviously didn't work."

"He actually tried a few times and it most definitely did not. Lucky he doesn't have my number anymore or else I assure you he'd keep trying."

Marella laughed.

"Well, moving on from grade A assholes, I'm supposed to tell you there's a party tonight. I'll have to send you the address later, I have it on my phone though, I am told there's gonna be booze, so I'm going."

"Eh, I'll probably go. Just to get my mind off everything."

"Thata boy." She lifted her phone. "And my shifts over in three, two, one, and I am out of here! See ya' tonight Hunkyhair."

"That's Lord Hunkyhair to you."

She just rolled her eyes and clocked out, leaving Keefe to deal with both the customers and his own thoughts.

~*~

Tam sat in his dorm room alone, constantly refreshing his grades for the possibility that his 70-year-old professor would post the test results at 1:30 am.

His roommate was gone for the weekend, actually he was gone most of the time. Tam didn't think they'd even had a full conversation before.

He jumped as his phone began to ring, a call from Keefe of all people. He hesitantly picked it up.

"Hello?"

"Tam! Tam Tam Tam Tam Tam" Keefe's slurred speech was too loud for a phone call, Tam held his phone a bit away from his ear. "...fuck wait why did I call you..."

There was a long pause, neither said anything.

"Oh yeah! I needed to tell you something...but uh I uhm I forgot what it was."

"Keefe, where are you?"

"At a paaaaaarty, well, actually just outside a party because it was hot in there, but now it's cold out here so uh yeah."

Tam sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Okay, send me the address, I'm coming to pick you up. Wait right there and don't move."

"Okie dokie."

Tam heard a thud sort of sound and the rustling of grass from the other line before Keefe hung up and soon after got a message of his location.

After 20 minutes of walking in the cold, Tam came up to what seemed to be a frat house with Keefe sitting on the lawn in criss-cross, patiently waiting in short sleeves and basketball shorts, way too little clothing for the weather. His ruddy face smiled as he saw Tam approach.

"Tam! I remembered what I was going to tell you." He stood up, face falling right after. "Oh no wait I forgot again. Ooh! You need a drink."

Keefe grabbed Tam's hand, pulling him towards the house. Tam stayed in place.

"Hey, let's get you home dude."

Keefe pouted.

"I don't wannaaaa."

He slouched down, pulling on Tam's arm like a child having a tantrum.

Tam pulled him back up to his feet.

"C'mon, if you go to your dorm without fuss I'll buy you ice cream tomorrow."

Keefe seemed much more ok with going along with Tam with the ice cream deal. He pulled off his own coat and placed it around the very drunk boy, he didn't complain.

Keefe began humming some annoying song from the early 2000s that was playing from the house earlier as they walked back in the direction of the dorms.

Suddenly, Tam remembered something.

Fitz was Keefe's roommate.

Shit.

"Hey uh do you think Fitz is at your dorm?"

Keefe nodded confidently.

"Yep! Said he was gon' study. Wouldn't come to the party because of his 'reputation' or whatever."

Around reputation he did exaggerated finger quotes, nearly knocking Tam's jacket off his shoulders.

"Hm...in that case let's go to my dorm, ok?"

Keefe shrugged, apparently willing to go along with most things in his current state. Thank goodness Linh had made Tam bring extra pillows and blankets to college, he could sleep on the floor and just hope Keefe didn't get sick on him in the night.

It was ridiculously hard to lead Keefe back to his dorm. He tried to pull down his pants halfway there and Tam almost had to carry him up the stairs but soon enough they got there. He sighed with relief as he led his inebriated friend into the room.

"Okay, you can stay here for the night. I'll sleep on the floor."

Keefe plopped himself down on Tam's bed laying flat for only a moment before sitting up with a snap and a look of realization in his eyes.

"OOH! I remember what I was gonna tell you again!"

"Oh?" Tam said playing along, expecting him to forget again.

He patted the spot next to him on the bed, Tam continued to play along, sitting next to him.

"So Marella said that I should just tell you this, and it worked for her, so I'm gonna. And uh and you have to promise to listen 'cause I'm not sayin' it again."

At this point Keefe grabbed his face with both hands, staring right in Tam's eyes and squishing his cheeks.

"You're listening right?"

Tam nodded, mostly to shake Keefe's hands off his face.

"Okay."

Keefe took in an over dramatic breath as if he was preparing to preform in the Olympics before getting another grin on his face.

"I really like you."

"You really like me?"

He nodded mumbling "mhm".

"What do you mean?"

"I mean I like you. Like, like like you."

"Like...as a friend?"

"I said I wasn't gonna repeat myself. As a booooyfriend." At this point Keefe fell back on the bed, looking at the ceiling. Tam's cheeks were burning.

"How long have you liked me like that?"

"Mmmm..." Keefe seemed to ponder for a moment, "Prolly high school."

"Oh um...good to know. You should get some rest. I'll be down here if you need me."

"Alrighty."

Tam shut off the lights and Keefe started snoring quick. Tam could only stare up in the darkness, unable to sleep.

~*~

Keefe woke up that morning in a room he didn't recognize to a killer headache and dead phone.

He turned to the side, seeing a pile of blankets and pillows with a large gatorade, bottle of tylenol, and a note next to it. Suddenly last nights memories came flooding back.

Oh, shit.

He scrambled out of bed, headache and nausea hitting him harder as he stood up.

Despite the fact his head was spinning, he picked up the note from the ground and read it.

Hey, meet me at the reservoir around 6, we need to talk -Tam

F. U. C. K.

Had he really said all that stuff last night? Surely it was a dream, right?

Oh God.

He gathered his few belongings, plus the things to help the hangover, and left the dorms as fast as possible. Only having to stop once along the way to throw up in one of the campus trash cans, hopefully no one would notice.

Keefe didn't have anything to do and he really didn't want to face Fitz so he went about his day in last nights clothing. Then again, it was a college campus. Someone walking around with rumpled clothes carrying a gatorade probably wasn't that big of a deal for most people. By 5:30 he sat impatiently in the empty park where the reservoir was located, it was colder closer to the water.

Just as promised, at 6 o'clock he saw Tam approaching on the horizon.

~*~

Tam was damn near a panic attack as he walked around the park attempting to find Keefe. Eventually he found him, sitting on a bench still in his clothes from last night, face once again ruddy from the cold. He sat next to him wordlessly.

"So," Keefe started.

"So," Tam replied, looking down at his lap.

"Tam I-" Keefe turned to face him. "I'm sorry about everything last night, I probably just made everything super awkward. Not to mention it's a giant violation of the friend code to even have a crush on your best friend's ex-"

"Yeah, about that."

"What?"

"You're gonna maybe kill me for this but uh," Tam pulled on his bangs. "I sorta talked to Fitz about it, I figured you wouldn't and apparently I was right. He said he was okay with it as long as we were ok with it."

"Are you saying what I think you're saying?"

Tam sighed, "Perhaps."

Keefe once again wore that shit-eating grin of his.

"Can I hear you say it?"

"Why don't you have to say it?"

"Already said it last night! Your turn now. Why did you take care of me while I was drunk?"

Keefe stared at Tam excitedly waiting for the answer. Tam sighed.

"Because I love you, little shit."

"Ooh you said it-"

Tam smashed his lips against Keefe's, both quickly melting into it. After only a moment they pulled away.

"Agh, you taste like gatorade and vomit."

"Well you taste like salt so really what's worse."

"Definitely the vomit."

Despite this, Tam leaned back in. This kiss was a moment longer than the last, and when Tam pulled away Keefe chased it.

"Ok, look I'm sorry but you look like shit Keefe you have to go change." Tam removed his jacket, throwing it around Keefe once again and helping him up from the bench. Keefe laughed.

"Yeah, you're right. Ooh now that we're a thing you need a new nickname!"

"I do?"

"You do, how about 'Bangs Boyf' ooh or maybe you can be my 'provoked partner' or my 'snappy spouse' my 'agitated accomplice' perhaps."

"Do you just have these ready and prepared for any situation?"

"A magician never reveals his secrets."

"You aren't Houdini, you're an 18-year-old boy that currently reeks of frat party."

"Eh that's basically the same thing. I've seen some 18-year-olds at frat parties preform tricks Houdini could never dream of."

Tam sighed dramatically. "It's a good thing you're pretty, you know."

"Hey!" Keefe jokingly shoved him.

For the first time Tam's smile wasn't repressed.

#hope you like this elliot!#kotlc #keeper of the lost cities #kam #keefe sencen #tam song #kotlc fic #scheduled to post at 9 am and ill reblog once i get back to my phone because ill be doing x-mas stuff

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