#i will literally never accept dan as gossip girl | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cerisia76 · 2 years

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I think I never felt as sad as I’m doing now for Dan

Dan Humphrey is literally my Gossip Girl male crush since the first episode and now that I just finished 5x04, I think I can say I never felt as sad for him as I’m doing now. And the way the writers wrote this episode to make him end all alone reminds me of what is going to happen when he’ll be revealed to be Gossip Girl (it makes so less sense. Like in 5x03 he’s LITERALLY alerting Chuck (I promised myself I wouldn’t write about him but in this episode ALAS, he was actually essential) on the fact that Gossip Girl spy all of his moves and that he doesn’t want him to end up on the site.)

What makes me sad here is that we realize that deep down, Dan has no friends who will put him first like Serena and Blair can do for each other despite the toxicity of their relationship. Dan can finally enjoy a bit of success and light that isn't due to the fact that he dated Serena. He was afraid of being abandoned by his friends because of a satirical book. And as incredible as it may seem, Chuck Bass is the only one who understands the meaning of this word. Dan NEVER said that this book was an autobiography, it was even an "inspired" novel of his life, as he kept saying. And instead of having the support he should have from his closest friends, he reaps an anger that he had seen coming in the book and that he had written in the hope that it would allow them to understand that he had no bad intentions. And since each of them is selfish and self-centered, all of them have made the choice to focus on "their" character and not read the book in full. I suspect that this will change in the next episodes but here, Dan was there, desperately seeking the support of his loved ones and receiving none.

And can we talk for two minutes about the toxicity of Rufus' words? This is not the first time he has ripped out the heart of one of his children with the worst words they could hear. What could be more horrible for a child than to hear that his father is ashamed of him? And Dan and Jenny can confirm that nothing is harder to hear. But I think it's worth another post. Here I focus on Dan and the 5x04 because I'm not quite done.

In this episode I think the attitude that disappoints me the most is Nate's. Nate didn't even pretend to be interested in the novel. And for good reason, it is not in his interests. Dan only repeated throughout the novel that all this was not necessarily true to reality and everyone seemed ready to accept it. Nate had no problem with a character inspired by him being gay. On the other hand, while he does not even know what the novel is about, as soon as he learns that he is not "alone" to have inspired his character since he shares that of Eric. And then, instead of doing what any BEST friend would do, which is read the book or call Dan to ask him if he should see a problem with it, he calls Dan to call him a false friend. What makes no sense is that Nate does NOT know what he is talking about since he has NOT read the book. It leaves me quite speechless that we could have made everyone's best friend act like this. Especially when that day was so important to Dan.

For Blair, let's say that with her pregnancy we can possibly understand her mood swings but she is supposed to share the same intellectual level as Dan and they like the same novels as a rule. I find it hard to understand that she holds Dan to account for writing false things about her relationship with him. I mean... He NEVER said that everything was true, they were the ones who imagined it. Except that Blair's reaction is probably the hardest for him to hear. Of course, as blind as she is, she doesn't see how much he is in love with her. But I still have Dan's lost and confused look in mind when she tells him that their friendship is over for good. She broke his heart when it was not necessary at all. After... it's Blair but after everything he did for her in the previous episode and... actually since they are friends, it's terribly unfair to throw a sentence like this at him. Not to mention how she keeps reminding him that he's far off her priority list. In fact, I think the biggest problem with this story lies there. This book showed how far Dan was on everyone's list of priorities. So far away, that the idea that he can be successful without having been perfect in the image they had of themselves makes them cruel.

Serena probably has the most reason to be hurt I guess. She was the one who had the worst portrait after all. But it's also based on facts and the way she seems to think he has to see her the way she wants him to see her is very toxic. Of course I can understand her pain by reading this especially since Serena and self-mockery are not great friends. But the acts she had in the episode are only a reflection of what he was describing. The Serena of the book exist as much as the amazing Serena, always there for her friends, that she wanted to see. Except that instead of accepting her bad sides, she blamed Dan for them. So I wouldn't dwell on her reaction because on the one hand I conceive and understand it perfectly. But on the other hand, she acted in the most selfish way I would say. Because she is the one who knew the most what writing and a publication meant to Dan and she still ruined this event. As for Lily's transparency, let's not talk about it. The writers never wrote a relationship between Dan and her so I can conceive of it.

As for Rufus' attitude, it makes me very uncomfortable because in addition to reacting like a child when he is an adult and an artist who is supposed to differentiate between reality and fiction, he sees his son suffer, he sees him drown in a universe he doesn’t know and lose all his friends and what does he do? He pushes his head under water. Rufus is presented as an incredible father but here, he voluntarily chooses to smear Dan's evening by specifying

last night it was the launch of your career so I didn't want to say anything but...

a phrase that is enough to destroy what was supposed to be a beautiful memory for his son. And Rufus knows it.

Which brings me to the worst part of this little essay. Chuck Bass. The fact that this character that I hate with all my heart (except with Vanessa and Eva and his dog) is the only one who has been mature enough to support Dan (in a way he did not be too cruel he at least has this merit) because he knew how to distinguish fiction and reality makes it all the more difficult to see this episode which once again shows all the sides of the Upper East Side.

So I think I'm going to go to bed because this episode really put me in all my states. Dan Humphrey deserved better.

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love-geeky-fangirl · 2 years

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Handling of unplanned pregnancies in Teen Dramas

Inspired by @sodamnelectrocute 's comment on that post about Lane.

On older TV Shows from the 00s abortion was taboo. Sometimes they would bring it up but use an euphemism for it and they would never actually have a character go though with it.

The worst and most offensive example is in my opinion The Secret Life of American Teenager. Keep in mind that Amy was literally just fresh out of middle school when she got pregnant and yet her supposed best friend was absolutely bewildered when her other best friend as much as suggested that Amy gets an abortion. Later her very religious classmate who wasn't even her friend mind you rushed to the abortion clinic while Amy was in there to stop her along with the father of Amy's baby. What's even worse the father had no intentions of actually being a father no, the reason he wanted to stop her was to get Gracie, the Christian chick. The whole thing ends with Amy breaking down crying and not going through with it. Instead she considers adoption but that is met with even more judgement. This show literally said that the only right choice is to keep the baby, even if you're still a child and have no emotional maturity and financial stability to raise it.

Unfortunately Gilmore Girls also didn't handle this topic well. I love Gilmore Girls but it's a product of its time. When Lorelai got pregnant at 15 and Christopher's Mother suggested that she "gets rid of it" Emily was absolutely bewildered and said that it isn't an option and that the only way to deal with this is to get married. She made that decision for her daughter without even asking her what she wants. While Lorelai never said she wanted to have an abortion, it's awful that Emily just made that reproductive choice for her. But okay Emily is extremely conservative and controlling so this is in character. The show also brings up abortion when Sherry is pregnant with Christopher and this time actually uses the word. However by season 7 it totally regresses. When Lane and Sookie and pregnant and neither of them happy about it everyone around them acts like they should just suck it up because "aww babies are cute!"

Dawson's Creek tried to be progressive but failed. When Gale finds out she's pregnant and says she wants an abortion Dawson judges her. Then Gretchen opens up to him about her past pregnancy and says that she "made her choice but then she had a miscarriage". This makes him more open-minded and accepting of his mother's decision. But in the end she decides to keep the baby and everyone is happy. The problem with this is that it tried to destigmatize abortion but failed because first of all it never actually says the word and secondly both of these women just consider it but don't actually go through with it just so it doesn't completely ruin them in the eyes of the viewers.

Gossip Girl did a similar thing. When Blair got pregnant and didn't even know who the father was, Dan pointed out that she "still has options". Blair says:"I know" but decides to keep the baby anyway. Just like 10 episodes later she ends up miscarrying. And just like that the whole thing is almost never brought up again. Her whole pregnancy and Baby Daddy storyline was just for drama and when it was inconvenient they wrote it off.

Surprisingly Glee handled it pretty well compared to the previous entries. Finn asks Quinn if she's gonna get an abortion. Quinn says No which is very in character for her. She agonizes over what to do next until she decides that it would be best to give the baby up for adoption. This is understandable, she is only 16, still in high school and doesn't have any money since her relationship with her parents is strained at the time. In season 3 there's this weird plot line about her suddenly wanting her baby back but this could be explained as depression/post partum but the show glosses over it which is not great. But as for giving her choices the show did a good job there.

On a more positive note Skins was the first show who did a very good job with this. Jal finds out she's pregnant when her relationship with Chris is not great so she doesn't tell him. It was frustrating to watch and I wish she had told him but she didn't and he ended up finding from someone else that she had an abortion. This shows that women often don't tell the fathers and while in this case I wish she had told him, sometimes it's better that they don't. Showing her agonizing over that decision was also realistic I think and really sad. But in the end she did what was best for her.

Some shows that also did it well are Sex Education and Euphoria. While we tend to say that abortion is never an easy choice, sometimes it is and both of these shows showed that. Okay I'm not entirely sure about Cassie, with Maeve at least it was an easy choice and a right one. She was 17 and barely scrapping by living with a trailer. It was realistic that the protesters outside the clinic called her a bad person she and Otis didn't think much of it because it was her choice. With Cassie it's a bit more complicated since she did look sad about it for a moment but in the end she was 17 and had an unsupportive partner on the brink of a break up. The choice she made was a right one but I have a theory they are going to have her go through depression or regret her choice in the next season.

Anyway the point of this was how the portrayal of abortions on TV changed over the years and luckily it changed for the better. It finally got destigmatized.

#analysis #tv #teen dramas

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dhaaruni · 2 years

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saw an old post about why you liked chair and i agree! there are toxic parts to their relationship but i genuinely think they've grown by S6 to accept them as an endgame. and if im honest, i liked them from the start. they were intriguing as despicable scheming friends but then they became romantic, it was fascinating to watch these awful people be gentle and genuinely love each other. i do wish the show refilmed the pilot because people (especially on twitter) use triggering words as insults

Cont. also hate that serena ended up with dan! he never stopped judging her and didn't even apologise for his awful article about her while they were dating again!! and his relationship with blair is soo overrated, he constantly manipulate and undermine her when he got a crush on her. its not a surprise imo that people who ship them dislike who she is in S6 which is her best season for character development imo.

You get it!! As does Jacob Clifton, who follows me on my private Twitter of all places and wrote this about Dan and Serena in season 6, which I totally agree with, bolded mine:

There is no answer. Anybody who tells you there is a real world and you are not in it, is selling you something. Selling you powerlessness, selling you self-hatred. You can’t do anything about what you were born with but you can do something with it, and if anybody ever tries to hammer you about it, they’re just trying to stop you from helping because that is, to them, how they are helping. Easier to attack an ally than make an enemy a friend. It’s gross and short-sighted and it’s a power game, so yes. He is tricksy. He got gratitude and shame mixed up. This whole show is kind of about that, if you think about Serena and Dan, and how badly he needs her to hate herself for not being like him.

But if you ever get confused, or scared, or convinced you’re a shitty person, just think about it that way: The difference between gratitude and shame is that they are opposites. One of them leads you back to the world and the other cuts you off from it. One is a powerful healing force and the other is an infected wound.

Chuck does horrible things in the show but Dan's like mundanely awful on a regular basis, judgmental and petty and snide, and that's much worse in a way like you expect Chuck to do reprehensible things and he always atones for them in the narrative but Dan does stuff that's almost as bad to literally every other character but never faces any consequences for it!! He's more easily forgiven than even Serena and that's really saying something.

I think that the parts of Gossip Girl that most hold up are honestly the Non-Judging Breakfast Club parts like the Nate/Blair/Chuck/Serena relationship is hands down the best dynamic on the show and it's not that hard to strip away all the other stuff and enjoy them. I mean, Jenny and Vanessa say it in season 4, they'll always pick each other over everybody else and even my mom commented on the strength of their dynamic when she watched the show!

#answered #gossip girl #anonymous #jacob clifton

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zalrb · 3 years

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Why do you think it’s more common to hate characters like dean, Ted, Ross, and Dawson, Dan rather than Jess, Barney, Damon, chuck? Like people will claim the latter are toxic “nice guys” and twist them into the worst characters ever. And fair enough I see they are annoying but then why Stan characters that are as abusive and horrible as chuck and Damon? I don’t get it. That’s why I appreciate ppl like you that see the flaws in all these characters in a more thoughtful way!

It’s a few reasons.

For something like Dean vs. Jess, I think there’s a willful misinterpretation of the text (like everyone mentions him yelling that he doesn’t care about Harvard but not about the fact that by the end of the episode he apologizes and says he was an idiot for being jealous of Harvard and doesn’t want to be someone who stops her from going) and a double standard -- like it’s OK for Rory to be stringing him along and flirting with another guy right in front of his face and not being brave enough to break up with him but Dean breaks up with her in public because he’s tired of it and that’s inexcusable; Dean is super jealous of Rory and Jess and that’s seen as a fault but not the fact that Rory is growing distant from Dean but won’t break up with him.

But I also think Jess is individually a more compelling character because he was built to be a character unto himself, Dean was built to be Rory’s first boyfriend so Jess has more personality, I mean I think he’s a little shit, but he is textually more dynamic than Dean, he just is, and people respond to that more.

With Chuck vs. Dan, lmao, one of these days I’m going to rewatch Gossip Girl and post my unpopular opinions about it because apparently Derena is abusive but somehow Chair isn’t even considered toxic but anyway, one criticism I’ve read is that Chuck knows that he can be a shitty person but Dan pretends that he’s morally superior when he really isn’t and barring the fact that I think it’s funny that knowing you’re a shitty person and doing nothing to change that is considered more acceptable, Dan being judgemental is actually supposed to be a character flaw, which I wonder if people realize, like it’s in the text,

Dan having a sense of superiority is also supposed to be a blind spot

People also use Chuck’s upbringing to excuse his behaviour (he grew up wealthy but unloved) whereas Dan grew up in a supportive household so he has no reason to do morally dubious things (I mean, I guess). And I didn’t really watch the latter seasons so Dan’s descent into being a total dick isn’t something I’ve seen but I’ve also heard the criticism that Chuck gets a redemptive arc while Dan goes through a descent and it ends with him being Gossip Girl so he’s just a ruined character.

I also think a part of it is people just want to enjoy the fun and the crazy antics of the Non-Judging Breakfast Club (who do judge each other constantly, which is hilarious, Dan is not the only judgemental person in the show) and Dan is kind of a wet blanket making commentary on how ridiculous they all are so people find him annoying. It’s the same with Vanessa.

Dawson is insufferable, like he actually just is, and he’s framed as not being insufferable so I can see why that annoys people and Pacey is an infinitely more likeable character than he is. I don’t mind him being self-involved much in the first few seasons because I think it’s very adolescent, but what I will say when it comes to the triangle, when I think of the criticisms I’ve seen about how he views Joey, I realize that people don’t take into account that Joey acted the exact same way with Jen, like there’s all this rhetoric around how Dawson saw Joey as his

and he did but Joey also saw Dawson as hers

but Dawson’s Creek pre-season 3 doesn’t exist to people.

I already have posts about Damon, I won’t get into that.

Before I get into Ted, I will say that in general, I found HIMYM incredibly sexist, racist, and generally unfunny, which is why I didn’t watch it for the longest time.

So as someone who does not like Ted and could not stand Ted, it’s pretty much the same reason people hate Dawson, in fact I said Dawson was Ted Mosby before Ted Mosby. For me, anyway, I just didn’t care to listen to a man drone on about how he tried to find the one through his exploits where he’s framed as idealistic and romantic but he’s actually just sexist, like it was obnoxious and Ted was obnoxious but you’re supposed to root for him and I was like, why tho?

Neil Patrick Harris as Barney is just a more charismatic character and he’s given quips and sayings (I remember my guy friends in university ‘suited up’ because of him) and humour is powerful because it makes certain things that are deplorable more palatable and a “oh that’s just how he is” and I also think his relationship with Robin helped because it was compelling relationship, I mean it was literally the only thing about the show I liked.

The Friends thing is just ... it’s probably because Ross and Rachel were framed as, like, THE romantic pairing of the show and people are harder on him because of that although Rachel’s toxic behaviour and complicity in that relationship is never spoken about but I also think it’s because of the conscious and unconscious desire to defend/protect/victimize white women because Rachel did some shit too. People also conveniently forget that many of Ross’ shitty decisions in that relationship were influenced by Joey and Chandler, I don’t know the Friends one still has me like

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warriorbarnes · 3 years

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for no ones entertainment but my own, here is a list of my top seven weirdest hyperfixations and explaining Why they’re weird

7. supernatural (2.0) now, the first time i hyperfixated on spn i was like. 14, and and just at the start of my tumblrina career. everyone was into superwholock, so it made SENSE that i was into supernatural. HOWEVER the SECOND time i got into supernatural was. weird. i watched 15 seasons (skipped maybe 6 episodes in total) in LESS than two months. then i spent like 9 or 10 months after that thinking only about supernatural. i am 24 years old. it was weird

6. commentary youtubers for WHY? the lowest form of entertainment. i literally spent like a solid month of my life watching people watch videos and make jokes about them, OR watch people listen to albums and talk about them. sometimes i hadn’t even heard the album myself! i didn’t even really LIKE the people i watched, like they were all. a few years younger than me and honestly a little bit annoying. but i kept WATCHING THEM. sooo stupid. very happy to be done with that. for context this was when i was like. 22?

5. gossip girl (only ten episodes) when i was like. 16? 17? i spent a solid two weeks thinking ONLY about gossip girl; but not the entire show. only the ten episodes in season 5 where dan and blair are together. dair for life, i never watched s6 and refuse to accept dan as gossip girl:/

4. british stand-up/panelshows i was 17. it was summer break. i spent hours upon hours upon hours watching low quality episodes of british panel shows on youtube (we’re talking 480p at BEST). never mind the buzzcocks, 8 out of 10 cats, 8 out of 10 cats does countdown, the big fat quiz of the year, etc etc etc. and then that also meant i had to watch stand up shows to get my fix. this all culminated in one of thee most awkward moments of my life when i met rob beckett on the streets of edinburgh. i don’t want to go into details.

3. one direction i don’t think one direction is that weird of a hyperfixation. like, it’s not very niche, lots of people have been obsessed with one direction. however, it ranks so high bc i got into them in 2014, when i was almost 18 years old, and up until this point i had been. very negative towards them. i was a bit of a hipster to be honest, but all of a sudden i was also a HUGE one direction fan. i blame niall horan.

2. british soap operas when i was 19 i was OBSESSED with various british soap operas. mainly emmerdale, but hollyoaks and eastenders also got a fair amount of my attention. like with the panel shows, this started out with low quality youtube clips, but it didn’t stop there! at one point following just a few storylines from the shows wasn’t enough, so i downloaded a vpn and made accounts on itv hub/channel 4 so that i could watch all of the new episodes in full. that’s a new ep EVERY DAY, AND i had to watch the ad breaks as well. today i’ll still watch some clips on youtube from time to time, it’s good fun.

1. formula 1 i don’t like cars! i have never had ANY interest in cars. it was okay when it was just drive to survive on netflix, bc that isn’t really. about the cars. but it has PROGRESSED and i now. eagerly await race weekends. i watch free practice, which honestly is POINTLESS, but i. love it. i’m 24 years old, i do NOT have a drivers license, and i am obsessed with men driving really fast cars. i blame sebastian vettel

#:)#marth.txt #listen. i am categorizing these as weird either bc they are niche or bc it just. was weird for ME to be obsessed w these things

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mrs-nate-humphrey · 3 years

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super cool that a show for teens has such a fucked up definition of power. fantastic that they had blair marry her longtime abuser after having her spend the season trying to prove her worth to him. radical that dan is only accepted by the gang after coming out as GG, and gets to marry the girl he apparently cyberbullied for close to a decade as his reward. amazing that lily annuls her (mostly) healthy marriage with rufus to end up with the guy who literally poisoned her. i love gg 🙃

yeah, objectively: this show is bad. every single topic that needs to be handled sensitively and with careful thought is ruined. ‘if you liked someone in high school you’re obliged to spend the rest of your life with them’?? dowry is romantic now and women are like property? it’s okay to take a video of your ex boyfriend having sex with you without his consent if you’re really sad?? rehab exists and serena recognises she needs it and then we never go there again? dan can forgive all his white friends for the terrible things they do to him, but kisses serena while dating vanessa and is generally a terrible boyfriend to her, but he cuts her out of his life forever for reading & taking his manuscript, which... not good, sure, but also, is something she’s always done with his writing, even when they were in high school?? let’s all out sex workers multiple times even though that’s really dangerous and puts THEIR LIVES at risk??

like, what the fuck, seriously. i hate it.

i love shows that deal with dark material while acknowledging that it’s dark. i started watching YOU for penn (hahaha) & i am blown away by how much i’m liking it because it’s not something i thought would be my genre. i love s1 of jessica jones, and the themes of her getting one over her abuser, even though that centres and delves into the abusiveness of jessica/kilgrave often with incredibly uncomfortable depth. like i think stories like that are necessary, and can be empowering and enlightening, and can facilitate conversations around abuse and predatory behaviour.

gossip girl was.. not that. it had so many dangerous behaviours and mindsets not only portrayed these as healthy and normal, but as romantic. and like you said, it was a teen show!! i feel like it started out (like the gg books, probably) actively being a satire of WASP culture (& i loved that) but after a point it started glorifying everything it was trying to condemn. at this point i can just link you to that vox article again.

#anon #anti gossip girl #with the sort of scope and reach that this show had...#portraying things in this way is incredibly irresponsible #it's full of #misogyny and racism and classicm #and anti-sex worker sentiments #and. a 101 other terrible things #it's like they went 'how can we make this show as awful as possible'#and did ALL of that #i was a goner because i love the characters in this trash show fiercely #theyre my children!! i love them #but this show is terrible! no doubt about it #anti chair

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anotherworldash · 4 years

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Uhh how can you say you like Serena then ship her with Dan when he was literally both emotionally and verbally abusive to her and he never apologised for it instead he actually blamed her for the abuse 🥴

Newsflash : You can like a ship despite it being abusive. I never and will not claim Derena as a good ship. It is just not OOC for both of them to be attracted to each other. Dan is obsessed with her and Serena tends to choose self-destructive path in her life.

I literally got 4 similar message regarding this “Derena ship discourse” so I’ll explain all of them here. Also since you recognize me from this post, I’ll quote some points : https://gossipgirls.tumblr.com/post/627849598718918656/what-are-your-most-unpopular-gossip-girl-opinions

(3. “Dan was the only appropriate choice for the identity of gossip girl and i’m not all that bothered by the inconsistencies/plot holes

4. “On that same note, derena’s endgame was not ooc for either of them. she definitely deserved way way way better and it’s not my desired ending for her, but it was the most logical way to end the show considering its messaging. ) These points speak for Derena :

Dan was obsessed with Serena, he wanted to be a part of her world so bad. He ran a fan blog about Serena and her friends so he can be significant in her eyes because deep down Dan knew Serena’s status was beyond him, socially and financially. He emotionally manipulated her to believe that she is not beyond him, decided he didn’t like her anymore along the way, but ultimately made his decision that Serena is the right one for him. Surprisingly, Serena accepted the fact GG was Dan all along. SHE EVEN MARRIED HIM.

But why are people surprised by her reaction? Judging from her self-destructive behavior, Dan is the most impressing suitor in Serena’s life. Dan has made her his muse, goddess, inspiration, and goal. The others are just kind of there... or willingly become her doormats. They didn’t fascinate her. This self-destructive tendency is also the reason she chose Tripp over Nate.

Again, shipping Serena with Dan doesn’t mean I don’t love her. I ship Serenate too, I just think Derena is hotter, that’s all. I think Derena is the equivalent of Chair, charmingly abusive.

#derena #serena vdw #otp

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ddp456 · 6 years

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“It’s quite simple, really...”

So, Wendip fans - I have good news and bad news.

Bad news first - My Wendip surprise has hit a snag. (yes, again this year, too!)

I’ll give you all an update ASAP. In the meanwhile, I whipped up this little yarn to serve as an appetizer until then. Same deal goes as the last fic - if someone cares enough to make a cover art for this, I’ll throw it up on Fanfction.net as well.

Enjoy!

“This isn’t going to hurt, is it?”

Wendy Corduroy squirmed in the rigid seat. The oddly-shaped helmet strapped to her head matted her poofy auburn hair against her brow, leaving it covered with beads of sweat. Her eyes raced around the secret laboratory beneath the Mystery Shack as dials clicked and spun, machinery hummed in different decibels, and vials of unknown liquids slowly boiled and bubbled beneath their heated test tubes.

Huge libraries of hardcover research books decorated the walls next to the exit. A spiraling stairwell led to another floor of boring-looking tomes. A number of end-tables and shelves displayed a lifetime’s worth of knick-knacks and souvenirs from untold adventures. An old, chipped worktable sat at the middle of the room, filled to the brim with clutter and unfiled paperwork.

“Absolutely not!” Stanford Pines double-checked the computer monitor across from her. He tapped away at the keyboard, inputting new commands at lightning speed. “In fact, it might just do the opposite.”

Wendy winced confusingly, “T-Tickle?” Her hands tightly gripped the sides of her chair.

Ford shook his head, “No, not that either.” His harden eyes moved upwards. “But don’t worry – we won’t be going anywhere near your feet, I assure you.”

Wendy’s freckled face turned white. “Huh?! How did you know I was thinking – “

The scientist chuckled. “To be honest, you told me.” He pointed to the giant video screen mounted behind Wendy. “Part of the procedure is that your thoughts will be shown on this display. The smaller televisions above it can provide collaborating videos and audio as well.”

Wendy turned around to see a series of green, flowing texts flying across the largest screen:

“HOW DID HE KNOW THAT? ISN’T THIS LIKE AN INVASION OF PRIVACY? HEY, AT LEAST I DON’T HAVE TO WORK NOW!”

The sound of laughter made Wendy switch screens. One of the smaller ones played a somewhat faint image of Dipper and her wrestling around on her bed. Wendy had her arm wrapped around his head as she gave him the ultimate noogie. On the other end, Dipper had an orange-and-yellow socked foot in a death grip as he mercilessly tortured its sensitive underside.

“Say it! Say that you give up!”

“NEHEHEHEH! Never! You – You first!”

Wendy smiled briefly at the memory before turning back around towards Ford. He silently watched the scene, itching his beard stubble with curiosity. “Hmm…”

She forced an uneasy laugh out of embarrassment. Ford’s silence only added to Wendy’s nervousness. Her fingertips tapped the armrests of the chair as the helmet seemed tightened around her head.

“This is so freaky! Why I’d even agree to this in the first place?”

It had only been less than a half-hour ago that the teen had been sitting at her post at the Mystery Shack’s Gift Shop. Wendy sat back on her stool, her shoulder-blades resting against the cracked wall as her mud-covered boots rested on the countertop. Her nose buried in the latest gossip magazine. The world was peaceful and quiet until…

“A-hem!”

“Whoa!” Wendy was jolted out of her zen. Her balance lost, her arms flailed in mid-air until she slipped from her seat and landed hard to the floor.

“OW!” She rubbed her sore backside as a hand reached out to help.

“Thanks, Dip.” Wendy accepted the help back to her feet. “You really scared the living – “

Her words faded as she was pulled upwards to meet Ford’s stern, broaden face. He adjusted his cracked glasses with his six-fingered hand as he cleared his throat once more.

“Sorry about that.” Ford apologized. “I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind assisting me with an experiment.”

“Oh, okay…” Wendy placed her fallen trapped cap back on her head. This had been the first time the long-lost Great-Uncle of the Pines twins had addressed her. “What’s up?”

“Not here…” To Wendy’s surprise, Ford walked towards the vending machine across from her desk and dialed a combination of random numbers. A second later, the ground shook beneath her feet. The machine itself slid away from the wall, revealing a hidden staircase leading deep into the earth.

“WHOA!” Wendy’s green eyes grew wide. She had heard Dipper mention something about secrets literally built into the Mystery Shack itself, but she never expected anything like this.

Ford walked down the steps as a series of lights hanging overhead instantly sprang to life. “Now, if you’ll follow me, we’ll be at my lab – “ He paused, noticing there wasn’t a second set of footsteps behind him. The elder spun around to see Wendy standing at the entryway with an unnerved expression.

“On second thought,” Wendy pointed towards the family entrance to the parlor. “Stan – I mean, the other Stan, will probably need me to stay here at the counter…”

“Oh, please!” Ford waved away in disgust. “Stanley’s been asleep in his recliner for hours! He didn’t care enough to put on pants today, yet alone properly manage a business!”

Wendy giggled and covered her mouth.

“I know things look odd and even scary. “ Ford held a hand against his heart. “But it is dire that you come with me. Your life, as well as that of your family and friends, may depend on it.”

Wendy’s guard dropped as the old man’s façade fell. His frown twisted into an all-too-familiar tiny beam. “Please…?”

“So, that’s where Dipper gets his smile from…”

Before she knew it, Wendy followed along the coat tails of the sage explorer down the staircase and onto an old-fashioned service elevator. Ford threw a nearby switch, closing a gate shut behind Wendy, making her flinch slightly. There was no going back now.

The elevator slowly descended down the shaft, its wheels noisily squeaking the entire way. The landing violently shook beneath their boots. An awkward silence filled the narrow passage.

“So…” Wendy broke the silence as Ford stared into the distance, seemingly lost in his own thoughts. “I never would have guessed that something like this was hidden beneath the Shack.”

Ford nodded, “It’s actually ironic – your father was the one who designed and built this very cottage.”

“Get out!”

“I will – “ He paused and let out a nervous laugh, “I see. You were using an euphemism. My mistake. But it’s true. Dan Corduroy helped create what you now know as the Mystery Shack over 30 years ago.”

“Wow…” Wendy absorbed her surroundings outside of the caged elevator. She looked on with a sense of pride, knowing that her family had lent a hand in creating such an extraordinary marvel. The redhead turned towards Ford. “Dad doesn’t about any of this junk, does he?”

He broke eye-contact. “Not...exactly. Let me put it like this: your old man thought I was putting in one hell of a den.”

“HA! Sounds about right!”

The elevator eased to a gentle stop. They were now in front of a sturdy redwood door. Golden marking wrapped around at the top and the bottom in half-circles as a jewel-encrusted keyhole lied in the center.

Ford reached into his coat pocket and retrieved a long, aged key. He inserted it into the opening and rotated it tightly. The door sprang open with a slow creak. He opened an arm towards the new room shrouded in complete darkness.

“After you…”

Wendy’s body grew sore in thanks to the awkward chair given to her. Proper posture wasn’t exactly her thing. She couldn’t decide if it was the seat or the uncomfortable atmosphere that added to her anxiety.

“I know this guy is Dip’s uncle and all, but why do I feel like it’s one of my old B-movies, where he’s going to hit a button, and shackles are going to pop outta this thing and grab my wrists and ankles?”

“I wouldn’t be too worried.” Ford reassured the worried girl with a sly grin. “I’m more of an “angry scientist” than I am a “mad” one, so I’m not exactly one to have deathtraps lying about the lab.”

“Huh?” Once more, Wendy glanced over her shoulder, finding her fears displayed for the world to see. She groaned aloud and pinched her nose in embarrassment. “Oh, man…”

“Secondly,” Ford walked to his desk and took hold of the roller chair placed there. “Unlike my brother, I do recognize the fact that child endangerment and imprisonment is a serious crime in the state of Oregon.”

Wendy bit her lip to stop chortling. Seeing her growing calm, Ford rolled the chair in front of her and took a seat. “And lastly, if anything, I asked you here for your own protection, Gwendolyn.”

“It’s “Wendy…” if you don’t mind, Mr. Pines.”

Ford glanced up at the large television for a split second.

“I HATE THAT NAME SO MUCH! WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS, MY MOTHER? I WISH I HAD A COOL NICKNAME LIKE DIPPER DOES.”

“My mistake, “Wendy.” Ford rubbed his chin with curiosity. “And I’d prefer “Ford” as well.”

“It’s a deal, Ford.” Her smile faded as she rubbed her hands together. “Um, going back to what you said earlier. This machine is supposed to “protect me?” She gently tugged on the black cord stemming from the helmet that led back to the series of screens. “And from what exactly?”

“Let me explain.” The man sat back on his padded chair, much to Wendy’s chagrin. “The machine that you are attached to is my own creation: Project Mentem mk-2.”

“That’s a mouthful!”

“You’re telling me. As that machine scans your mind, it will also shield it from being controlled by outside forces.”

“Outside forces?”

Ford leaned forward, “Have you ever heard the name “Bill Cipher?””

Wendy hesitated. “Uh, I…think so…”

Once more, Wendy’s thoughts betrayed her as they ran across the computer screen for all to see.

“THAT’S THAT TRIANGLE GUY, RIGHT? I THINK IT’S THAT TRIANGLE GUY. HE’S THE ONE THAT MADE DIPPER ACT ALL FREAKY A FEW WEEKS AGO. I KNEW SOMETHING WAS UP WHEN HE THREW HIS ARM AROUND ME AND CALLED ME “TOOTS.” AND HE WOULDN’T STOP STARING AT MY CHEST. EW!”

Ford placed his hands on the armrests of Wendy’s chair, missing her fingertips by inches. His tone grew utterly grim. “Bill Cipher is an interdimensional being, made of pure negative energy. He lives for complete and utter chaos! And he will not stop until he unleashes such horrors onto this very world!”

Wendy gulped, as another thought was splashed across the screen:

“I SAW THAT DRAWING IN DIPPER’S BOOK. THAT CREEP DIDN’T LOOK SO TOUGH TO ME. HE LOOKS LIKE SOME DEMENTED FLYING CORN CHIP. I BET I COULD TAKE HIM ANYTIME!”

Enraged, Ford rose to his feet, forcing his chair back. “THIS ISN’T SOME KINDA JOKE, KID!” He marched back and forth across his lab as Wendy was helpless to do anything but watch. “Do you even know what you’re dealing with?” He continued on lecturing. “This thing destroyed his own universe without an ounce of regret! He hunted me endlessly across countless dimensions and realities for the last 30 years! He’s responsible for the demise of several civilizations, and you think you stand a chance against him?! He’d destroy you in a blink of his eye!”

“I’m – I’m sorry, okay?” Wendy shut her eyes and turned her head. “I-I didn’t mean – “

Ford lowered his guard as his sights came across the master computer. His heart sunk into his knees as he quietly read the thoughts displayed:

“I HATE IT WHEN BOYS FIGHT. I HATE IT WHEN BOYS YELL AT ME. IT’S LIKE HOW STAN AND MY DAD ALWAYS YELL AT ME. I REALLY WISH HE’D STOP YELLING AT ME…”

He looked ahead to the teenaged girl shivering in her seat. Ford opened his six-fingered hands, wondering if he was any better than the monster he was trying to defeat.

“Wendy…” The scientist reclaimed his seat, but made sure to keep his distance. “I…I apologize for my outburst. But you have to understand, please; any matter that involves Bill in even the slightest capacity has to be taken seriously.” He ran a hand through his salt-and-pepper colored hair. “In the last few decades, I have born witness to the outrageous atrocities that he has committed across time and space. It is something that no one deserves to see. It is something no one deserves to fall victim to. For that, I implore you again: will you continue to help me keep not just this world safe from Bill’s influence, but my family as well?”

“It’s – It’s okay, man.” Wendy agreed with a shake of her head. “I’m still game if you are. So, what’s the plan? How can I help?”

As both persons calmed, Ford sunk back into his seat comfortably. “You already have.” He highlighted another computer monitor. “As the Mentem mk-2 scans your thoughts, it has been applying a shield to your brainwaves. See for yourself.”

Wendy spun to her right, finding a black screen with bright, dark-green text displaying a progress bar:

SCANNING THOUGHTS – 35%

“Within a few minutes,” Ford clarified. “The process will have scanned the entirety of your mind, protecting it from any possible threat from Bill.”

“Oh…okay, then…”

The two sat and peeked around the room without saying another word. The only sound to be heard was the occasional blip coming from the progress bar.

“Hey, Ford? Can I ask you a stupid question?”

“There are no stupid questions, but yes, proceed anyways.”

“Alright.” Wendy itched the back of her slender neck. “Why me? Why do you think this Bill guy would try to possess my mind like he did to Dipper?”

Strangely enough, Ford’s face lit up with interest. “It’s quite simple, really. I believe you would be the perfect selection for Bill simply because of who you are.”

“Who I am?” A dozen new thoughts raced through Wendy’s mind.

“WHAT DOES HE MEAN BY THAT? IS IT BECAUSE I GREW UP HERE IN GRAVITY FALLS? OR BECAUSE I WORK AT THE MYSTERY SHACK?”

“My mistake. I shouldn’t have been so coy.” Ford stood back up and began to pace with his arms tucked behind his back. Another “Pines family” trait that easily reminded Wendy of “her boy.” The adventurer paused for a moment, “It…wouldn’t be too forward to say that you and my great-nephew have grown close this summer, would it?”

Wendy found herself stunned for a split second.

“CLOSE? OF COURSE WE ARE. HE’S MY BOY. THIS SUMMER WOULD HAVE TOTALLY BITE WITHOUT THAT LITTLE GUY. AFTER EVERYTHING THAT WE’VE BEEN THROUGH, HOW COULD WE NOT?”

“Eh. You could say that…”

“I see…” Ford nodded along with both forms of testimony. “But the question is how close are you two?”

The lower-right screen displaying Wendy’s heart-rate instantly spiked.

“Only a fool wouldn’t be able to see that you share a sort of…” Ford waved his hand around in a circle as he attempted to find the correct term. “…a special bond. In fact, when Dipper sat in that very spot, you were a constant topic in his thoughts.

“Time out!” Wendy tried to switch the conversation around. “Dipper had this mind-mumbo-jumbo done to him, too?”

“Not exactly.” Ford confessed. “There was an…incident when we attempted to use the machine on him. It was only recently during some spare time that I was able to repair Project Mentem. Hence, the mk-2 at the end.

“SO I’M THE GUINEA PIG TO SEE IF THIS HUNK OF JUNK WORKS? GREAT, JUST GREAT. MAYBE IF MY BROTHERS DIDN’T MESS AROUND WITH THAT UNICORN HAIR DIPPER GAVE ME, I WOULDN’T HAVE TO SIT THROUGH THIS. I REALLY HOPE THIS DOESN’T BACKFIRE AND LEAVE ME WITH MY MIND WIPED LIKE WHAT THOSE BLIND-EYE JERKS TRIED TO DO TO US.”

Wendy gasped. She forced a cheesy grin and pointed at the big screen behind her. “Say, do we really need to have that thing on the entire time?” The lumberjane gently tugged at the wiring binding her to the circuity. “There isn’t a sleep mode or something we can switch on?”

Ford waved away her concerns. “It is more than all right, Wendy. I already know about the adventures you and Dipper have gone on these last few months.”

“You…do?” A sense of unease formed in the pit of Wendy’s stomach as her fears turned to anger.

“THAT LITTLE DORK! HE RATTED US OUT! ZIPPED LIPS, MY BUTT! JUST WAIT UNTIL I GET MY HANDS ON HIM! WHAT ELSE DID HE SAY? WAIT. THE MACHINE. WHAT IF THIS THING MADE HIM SQUEAL?”

Ford could see a new memory forming on the secondary monitor. Wendy and Dipper were standing with Mabel on the top of the Mystery Shack’s roof as the sun shined high in the clear blue sky. Meeting eye-to-eye, they each made a zipping motion over their lips simultaneously.

“Zipped lips, eh?” Ford noted. “But nevertheless, I can assure you, Dipper didn’t betray your trust in any fashion.”

“He didn’t?”

“Of course not.” The researcher went back to his desk and took an item with him before sitting down before Wendy. “In fact, I learned about your journeys the same way he did about mine here in Gravity Falls: though documentation.

Wendy looked to see the all-too-familiar hardcover book marked with a golden six-fingered insignia lying in Ford’s lap.

“Hey! That’s Dipper’s journal!”

“You mean my journal.” Ford proudly patted the front cover. “It makes this old man proud to see Dipper continuing in my researching the wonderful oddities inhabiting this town.” He opened the Journal 3 and scanned somewhere towards the middle portion. “You certainly had your hands full in the last few weeks, if I can say so. It’s all right here: ghosts in the convenience store, clones amongst party-goers here at the Shack, time-traveling shenanigans …”

“Uh…” Wendy held up a finger to object. “Kinda lost on those last two, Ford.”

“In that case,” Ford closed the journal. “What about the fact that when I went to check on my abandoned bunker in the woods, every trap I had set had been disabled and I found the captive alien shapeshifter frozen in an effigy that looked exactly like Dipper?”

“Uh…”

“Plus,” he reached into his oversized slicker and pulled out a dainty-sized lumberjack’s belt and a sheath for a hatchet. “I found these inside the bunker. I believe they’re yours?”

An uncomfortable laugh sailed pass Wendy’s throat. “You’re pretty mad about that, aren’t you?”

“Maybe at first, but after things came together, I was more amazed. Especially by what was captured on film.”

“We were taped?!”

“Wendy,” Ford said. “One does not hide thousands of dollars of equipment as well as one-of-a-kind alien technologies deep in the Oregonian woods without having some type of surveillance equipment at the ready.”

She shrugged. “True that.”

“And don’t get me wrong; all of you kids worked wonderfully as a group to recapture the shapeshifter, but it was the brief period in which you two were separated from Mabel and Soos that stood out. I could easily see marvelous examples of teamwork being displayed. I think it can go without saying how well you complement each other.”

“Thanks, I guess…” Wendy went to scratch her head, finding it blocked by the massive helmet. “Sorry if I seem rude, but what’s with all these questions about Dipper and me?”

“To be frank,” he explained. “I’m simply trying to fill in the blanks to a lot of uncertainties that I have.”

“Such as?”

“Perhaps, it would be best if I were more forward.” Ford lowered his crossed leg and hunched forward. “So, I’ll come out and ask: what are your intentions towards my great-nephew?

Wendy’s brow rose, pinching the tip of her head enclosed by the helmet. Her heart-rate monitor went into full-blown overtime.

“OH MAN! OH MAN! OH MAN! THIS IS LIKE HOW MY DAD GRILLS ANY BOY I BRING TO THE HOUSE. THIS IS KARMA PAYING ME BACK, RIGHT?! WHAT SHOULD I SAY? HOW – “

Unfortunately, the middle monitor provided the answer for her, as Wendy could hear her own voice playing through the speakers:

“But, I'm too old for you. I mean, you know that, right?”

Both watched the scene played out, as Wendy and Dipper sat on a log deep into the Gravity Falls Woods just outside of Ford’s hidden bunker, as she tried her best to calm his anxiety and over wrecked nerves.

Wendy lowered her head to see Ford still studying the screen with great interest. His face reminded her of Dipper’s as she had left him wondering on that log as she rode away on her bike. Wendy would give anything to be free of the embarrassing and awkward situation.

“Ford…” The teenager struggled with her words. “It’s not – I can explain…”

Her random thoughts spread across the main television at neck-break speeds.

“I WISH THINGS WEREN’T COMPLICATED. IT’S NOT LIKE DIP’S A BAD GUY. I HOPE HE UNDERSTANDS. I HOPE I DIDN’T HURT HIM. HE SEEMED FINE AT MOVIE NIGHT. WHAT ELSE COULD I DO? THERE’S NO WAY IT WOULD HAVE WORKED. MAYBE WHEN HE GETS OLDER…”

At long last, Ford finally spoke, “Well, that explains a lot. It’s not as serious as I thought.”

“Ford, you don’t understand – “

He looked straight at her and removed his glasses, wiping them off with his sleeve. “Let me tell you something,” Ford said without an ounce of emotion in his voice. “The more the things change – the more they stay the same. In Dipper’s case, it’s “you’re too young.” For me, an entire lifetime ago, it was “Sorry, Ford. But you have six fingers on each hand. What would people think?” He held up one of his unique hands for Wendy to see. “So, believe me, Wendy, when I say I understand perfectly.”

Wendy remained completely silent as a single thought forced on the screen behind her:

“DOES DIPPER THINK THE SAME WAY, TOO?”

The strict professor put his damaged spectacles back on. “But in all honesty, I am actually relieved by this revelation.”

Wendy shook her head in astonishment, “Wait?! You are?!”

“Of course.” Ford stood up, holding the Journal 3 in his right hand, and placed it back into a slot in his work desk. “After all, you are only a child yourself. I’d be shocked if things had played out any differently.”

The demeaning comment struck Wendy unexpectedly. It had been a long time since anyone had referred to her in such a way.

“Oh…kay, then. But I still don’t understand. What does all this Dipper-talk have to do with me and that triangle guy?”

“That’s precisely the point.” Ford walked back. “It’s all related. Other than myself, there isn't anyone else that Bill Cipher had more interactions than with Dipper. Like me, Bill has invaded Dipper’s dreams on occasion, and went as far as to trick him into giving him control of his body.”

“Meaning?”

“Meaning that maybe with the exception of Mabel, there is no one closer to that boy than you, Wendy. Over the last few weeks, Dipper has become more involved in my experiments and my research. It’s to the point he’s serving as a pseudo-apprentice of sorts. He now has knowledge that would allow Bill to conquer this world with ease.”

“Jeez…”

“…is quite the understatement. For this, I believe that if Bill couldn’t possess Dipper, he wouldn’t hesitate to use those closest to him as a bargaining chip. For some reason, he doesn’t bother Mabel. Maybe her dreams are so chaotic, they frightened even him. That leads me to believe that…”

“…he’d come for me instead.” Wendy finished. “So, when you said earlier that this mind-thingie is for my protection, it’s really more for Dipper’s. You think I’m some kind of…”

“…liability. It might seem harsh, but after everything I’ve seen in the footage from the bunker, I couldn’t be more certain. You both would stand in the face of danger for the other’s welfare. I truly think that if your life was in jeopardy, Dipper would be willing to sacrifice the entire universe to save you. And with all due respect, that scenario cannot be allowed to happen.”

Wendy didn’t know what to say. How could she feel so important and yet, so very small at the same time? As she thought about it a bit more, the redhead came to a new realization.

“Dipper – he doesn’t know I’m here, does he?”

Ford didn’t answer her question. His eyes rose over her head. “And we’re…just about…”

*DING!*

A bell sounded through the laboratory. The helmet finally released its death grip on her temples, as a drained Wendy nearly slid off her seat.

“Finished!” Ford rose to his feet and went to help Wendy up onto hers. He proudly patted her back, nearly knocking her off-balance. “How are you feeling?”

Wendy tried to find her center as she replaced her trapper hat on top her crown of copper hair. She grabbed her forehead. “My brain is throbbing.”

“All perfectly normal,” he declared. “Now, you want to be wary of any other side effects.”

“Other side effects?”

“Yes. This is my new prototype, after all. There wasn’t time to work out all of the kinks.” Ford began to count off on his fingers. “So, if you experience leaky eyes, bloody nose, oozing out of certain orifices, and/or itchy palms or soles, don’t hesitate to let me know immediately.”

“T-Thanks. Appreciate it…” Wendy was thankful her mind wasn’t being monitored any longer.

“Only the best for the liability. Isn’t that right, old man?”

As Wendy staggered towards the exit, Ford returned his chair to his desk and took a seat. He started to scribble all sorts of follow-ups into his notebooks. “I’m going to record my latest findings, so I’m afraid I’ll be a while.” He pointed towards the door, “If you want to go on ahead, simply throw the switch to bring the elevator back to the surface. You’ll find a button at the end of the path that’ll re-open the vending machine leading back to your work station.”

“You got it, Ford. I guess…I’ll see you around.”

Just as Wendy started to turn the door knob, she heard Ford call out, “Wendy, wait?”

She paused and looked back to see Ford with his chair spun towards her.

“For what it’s worth,” he anxiously adjusted his collar. “I wanted to thank you for everything that you do for Dipper. I, above all people, can understand how lonely and awkward things can be at his age. I’m glad that he has someone like you to help him along.”

Wendy let out a sigh of relief. “It’s no biggie, really. Like I said before, he’s fun to hang with, and – “

Ford continued on, as if he didn’t hear Wendy at all, “With that said, I figure that it’s only a matter of time before things return to normal, and your life will go back to how it used to be.”

She raised an eyebrow, “I’m not following you here…”

The senior went back to writing in his research, “It’s more than obvious that Dipper is extremely interested in following in my footsteps, and to be honest, I’d be more than honored to train him to do as such. However, if there’s one thing I’ve learned through the years, is that in this line of work, relationships, rather they be emotional or physical, romantic or platonic, are fleeting. In the end, they serve to be nothing more than a distraction from what’s really important in life.”

“What – What are you saying?”

“That in time, I’m more than positive that Dipper will grow out of this little fascination he has with you and focus on something that actually has substance in reality.”

“You think Dipper will just forget about me?”

“Or you about him. Whichever comes first.”

Wendy was left dumbstruck. Her stomach felt twisted by the man’s lack of empathy on all fronts. However, she couldn’t leave on this note. There was still one worry weighing down on her mind.

“Listen, Ford.” The ginger rubbed her elbow fretfully. “Before I go, I wanted to ask you one last thing. Let’s say that this little experiment didn’t work, and this Bill guy does find a way to take control over me. What would you do then?”

Ford stopped writing in his notepad, but didn’t show Wendy a speck of his attention. Another eerie silence filled the lab. Mere seconds passed like hours before he finally gave an answer:

“We’ll…worry about that if and then the time comes.” He returned to his studies as if nothing had transpired. “Please make sure to close the door behind you.”

It took nearly all of Wendy’s remaining strength to respond. “Yeah, I’ll do that…”

As Wendy slowly shut the door, she took one last look at the seemingly-disconnected old man focusing solely on the isolated world that he created for himself. As much as she hated to admit it, this also reminded her of “her boy” as well.

The exhausted clerk pulled the switch back, making the elevator creep back up the way it had come. She leaned against the gated wall with folded arms as her mind raced over the recent experience, and all that came from it. A glimpse of natural light offered little comfort from the gloominess of her current surroundings.

One thing was for certain: When Wendy reached the surface, she was definitely going to have to stare at a wall for a while, and rethink everything…

#wendy corduroy #dipper pines #wendip #wendipweek #gravity falls #grunkle ford

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hoochy-coo · 3 years

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I think it’s also telling on how the show accepted Chuck’s behavior instead of saying “This is obviously horrible and not the right thing to do”. It’s so sad and funny how the show’s least problematic character (although his relationship with Paige was weird) was also the most boring. Nate was their to look pretty and have inappropriate relationships with older women. And Dan being Gossip Girl isn’t even physically possible. The show should’ve just ended with the original Gossip Girl saying that they’re all Gossip Girl because they all told on each other. And the way the show treated the lower class characters (although the Humphrey’s were not lower class)

Chuck literally did the minimum by apologising to Jenny and Blair years later after going to therapy and they swiftly pushed it under the rug and never touched on it ever again. I liked and understood Nate’s characterisation up until S4/5. I got that he was supposed to be this gorgeous, somewhat naive/dopey dude with a good intention even if he made mistakes at times. I have a feeling they had no idea what to do with him after his relationship with Serena abruptly came to a close at the end of S3.

And yes, Dan being GG made 0 sense. It was so stupid, they should have not revealed who it was supposed to be if they were going to run with that lol

#ask #answer #gossip girl #tv #gg

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stenka-razin · 6 years

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More DB Minus stuff

So I get why Toriyama would want to rewrite near everything about Goku’s parents, since that wasn’t his story. I just don’t understand why he decided the story he wrote was so incongruous to what he had previously written (unless he just didn’t care).

First and foremost, Goku’s biological parents are unimportant. They just are. The original run makes it clear that Goku doesn’t care about his Saiyan family at all, he tells that point blankly to Raditz. All of his Saiyan memories and heritage are erased in childhood, and his entire personality is molded by Grandpa Gohan and Master Roshi. We don’t need to know his birth parents because within the narrative they are both explicitly and implicitly unimportant to understanding Goku as a character. And that applies to both Gine and fan favorite Bardock.

Contrary to it’s title, the reason the Bardock special works is not because he’s the Father of Goku. His interaction with Goku is pretty minimal. It’s more of a story about the Saiyan society and it’s downfall, with Bardock being a Cassandra figure. It could basically have been any old Saiyan leading the failed rebellion and then having visions of Freeza’s ultimate defeat. Having it be Goku’s dad does help thematically link it back to the main story of Dragon Ball, but absolutely none of the story is about Bardock being an influence or predecessor to Goku. In fact, he’s very not-Goku-like. He starts the special off committing Genocide. There are no deeper ties between the two.

With that said, Dragon Ball Minus does give us a version of the story where Goku’s parents are a positive influence on him, and send him off to Earth for his safety rather than to destroy it. Let’s run with that. So... what the fuck happened to Raditz?

Like Minus shows that Gine and Bardock had a similar bond with him. Hell they even talk to him in that story. But Raditz is a complete shit when he meets Goku in Z, and point blank tells Goku that he was sent to Earth to conquer it. I’ll accept some plotholes with a good retcon, but this is massive. The whole Saiyan saga and them some is built around this conflict. Raditz bad, wants Goku to be bad like he was supposed to be, Goku dies stopping him. Was Raditz just seriously lying to him the whole time? He’s notably dishonest, but his whole lie would literally depend on him knowing that Goku got brain damage as an infant on Earth. And he keeps it up when he’s talking to himself? Alone?? Hello, Dan Humphrey (spotted: Gossip Girl reference). It is completely at odds with narrative and that doesn’t even touch upon how odd it is that Raditz exhibits none of Gine’s “softness.”

Thematically it doesn’t fair much better. Goku’s origins aren’t super deep, but having Earth’s savior being originally sent to destroy the planet is a nice little irony. Dragon Ball Minus’ version is, as many have pointed out out, a wholesale rip off of Superman. The original wasn’t amazing, but it had a lot more going for it, especially since Goku was never really supposed to be a metaphor for the immigrant; Toriyama famous didn’t plan anything. The surprise, “he was supposed to be bad!” I think works way better when you have a character so innocently dumb and goodhearted like Goku and want to give him a twist of a backstory. Especially when that backstory is a tool to bring in Goku’s evil ancestors.

Those are my main gripes with how the story reworks Goku’s origins. There’s other stuff you can pick at (Bardock is supposed to be more sympathetic, but he still kicks this story off mid-Genocide), but this is the stuff that is so at odds with the rest of the Dragon Ball canon. And of course, it is Toriyama’s story and he has every right to change the bits he wants. And I don’t want to imply he doesn’t care about Dragon Ball anymore, but at times it certainly feels like his approach is increasingly haphazard. Dragon Ball Minus is the worst offender in that category.

#long post #dragon ball #dragon ball minus

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thestagthatlovedthewolf · 6 years

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The fellow portuguese @2070 asked for two question from the “ hi, I’m not from the US” ask set:

7. three words from your native language that you like the most?

My favorite word is no difference from English or Portuguese, because it’s literalmente/literally, I love how this word can mean ‘literally’ and ‘figuratively’, it just really express how language is alive and changes and evolves. Now after that, I don’t have many favorite words – it’s not really something I think about

I like bué, it’s slang for “a lot”, and I probably shouldn’t use it as much, but I like it... and it’s more accepted now that when people started using it in the 2000′s

And I like adoro, like in English, you have ‘adore’ but it’s not really used. You mostly use ‘love’ for everything, and I like that in Portuguese, we have this two words that are both used and have different connotations

14. do you enjoy your country’s cinema and/or TV?

Movies and TV, it depends on the things (and this answer got long)… Cinema is a bit harder for me to like, they had some good comedies coming out, like Gaiola Dourada was really great and I really wanna see the Markl one that came out last year with the dinosaur. But then I also feel like a lot of Portuguese movies are really dark and about sex and drugs and that’s not really my style, so I’ve been put off a bit.

TV, there are very good things!! Soap operas which are huge here and not really my thing, I watched Morangos com Açúcar, because as a kid growing up in the beginning of 2000’s, you needed to watch it; I watched the first three seasons religiously during elementary school, almost every episode, and then season 4 and 5 less and less, season five probably only the first few months, and then never watched again. So yeah, this is the only soap opera I watched and it’s because during first grade, everyone is playing at this.

But then going into great Portuguese series, the best one is still Não há Pai (which translates to ‘There’s no Father”) and I probably watched this when was 3 or 4 years old and it was filmed in front of a live audience and it was about this comedy about a rich family and their father took off and they were trying to make it – it was hilarious (and I’m pretty sure I probably didn’t get half of the jokes).

There’s Ministério do Tempo, which you heard me talk about a lot last, and it’s about ministry of time with people trying to stop things from being changed. The characters were excellent and they worked so well off each other and it was something new and completely different from what he had ever seen.

Also a 2000’s one, Os Serranos, that just like the recent one I mentioned it’s inspired by a Spanish show, and it’s about this couple that gets married and they have kids from different families and it’s all of them getting together and used to each other (also the older kids like each other) – also the reason that I don’t understand why in Gossip Girl they couldn’t have Lily and Rufus, and Serena and Dan dating. Also a memory from this show, this was late on Sunday, and sometimes I watched it live with my parents, other times I record it and then watched at my grandma’s on Wednesday – her VHS was better )and my mom worked late on that day) – and one episode had a side plot about a sex tape and I remember being mortified watching that with my grandmother.

A few really good ones I watched when I was 11 or 12, at the same time I was watching Gilmore Girls – it was an episode of that and then one of this shows. So the first was Querido Professor (which translates to ‘Dear Teacher’) which I watched a few episodes as a younger kid and then watched the all thing now, this was about a “will-they-won’t-they” relationship between two teachers in an elementary school and it was so much fun and sexy. And then as those reruns finished, started another old show called Bairro da Fonte (which I’m hoping sometime they put it on Netflix, mostly with Os Serranos too, they have put some shows I don’t really care about, but I would love to rewatch this) – so it’s about the life in a neighbourhood and it’s so many different things happening – there’s family, friends at the café for beers every day – just AWESOME, one of the best.

And then finally if you understand just a bit of Portuguese (or Spanish), check out Gato Fedorento (it translates to Smelly Cat and yet inspired by the Phoebe song) on Youtube – they are this amazing Portuguese comedians and you really should check it out!!

This got way too long… sorry…

#2070 #personal #portugal #ask #asks

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kxias · 7 years

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...so, yeah, don’t rlly know how the fuck i got accepted to be quite honest w you??? like that definitely sounded fake but yet here we are??? anyways, hi, i’m red (she/her pronouns please) i’m 19 and i live in the est timezone and i am so, so excited about this roleplay — like i said, highkey was not expecting to get accepted so it certainly came as a shock when i refreshed the main before leaving to grab dinner and saw my post? i’ve been dying to put this muse of mine into play for a month or so now but i really haven’t been able to find a group that i was Down for up until i saw this one ! i am a heaux for uni rps, an even bigger one for the greek life rps since i in a million years would never be able to join greek life (yay introvert!!) and while i wasn’t here first time around, i’m happy to be here now and writing w all you lovely people ; i’m working on getting her stats and wanted connections up so pls bear with me, classes started back today and i’m trying to sift thru all the junk of my online courses while attempting to enjoy my last moments of freedom but they’ll be up soon ! in the meantime, there’s a bit beneath the cut about my baby angel and a few ideas to tide you over, make the heart go red and i’ll pop in your ims for plots ! and yes, i do ramble like this all the time so Get Ready !!

tw: death, slight depression, mentions of verbal/emotional abuse

have you read the gossip blog lately ? apparently, a GIGI HADID lookalike was seen strolling across campus with their DANCE textbook. but nah, that’s just KAIA ZAMAN, the TWENTY year old JUNIOR, i’m sure you know HER. they’re mostly known as THE SANGUINE because they’re very SILVER-TONGUED and INTREPID but also RETICENT and GUILELESS.

so kaia was born and raised in chicago, illinois, the only child her parents ever had due to a few factors — one of which being that it was incredibly hard for her mother to carry a child + rushed into an emergency hysterectomy right after kaia’s birth, so she was their rainbow baby

her parents did everything in their power to make kaia as happy as they possibly could since she had been everything they’d wanted for so long, so whether it was letting her watch another cartoon before bed or enrolling her in dance classes at the age of three after a full-fledged obsession with the nutcracker reached its pique, they pretty much granted her any wish she could’ve possibly had

at age four, a few nights after christmas, kaia and her parents were on their way home from dinner, taking a road that was pretty notorious for collecting black ice in the winter and got into a really bad accident, and this cost her both of her parents

so in her father’s will + due to a lack of any other eligible family members, kaia was left in the custody of her uncle ( dad’s younger brother ) and it was...disastrous, to say the least; daniel had pretty much resigned to a life of forever being a bachelor and fucking around and now he had a four year old niece that he was expected to raise???

her uncle was a trashbag with a few shreds of decency (driven by guilt) in him — he wasn’t going to dump her into the foster system but he sure as hell didn’t want anything to do with her ! so in true trashbag fashion, he just decided to completely neglect her, pretend like she wasn’t there and hope she’d get the hint, and it took her a while to figure this out?? kaia was a sweet kid who went from having a shit ton of affection and love to being ignored and treated like she was a nuisance, and it fucked w her head at four years old

she wound up raising herself; all her uncle was good for was giving her a place to live, making sure she had clothes on her back and food in her stomach, and putting on an act when people gave a second glance their way. the only time he really wanted anything to do with her was when he could benefit her somehow, like keep one of his girlfriends around ( they all found kaia adorable and daniel ‘admirable’ for stepping up ) or when it came to the $$, her parents had left her a little but daniel pretty much absorbed it and took it for himself, to throw more parties or buy booze or play sugar daddy to one of his hookups?? like i said, trashbag

kaia and her uncle were roommates at best, and that was pushing it — she struggled a lot with the neglect internally, and her way of coping was to push it down, push it down, suppress with a smiling face and act like all was well. daniel was enough of a decent person to let her continue with the dance lessons which she absolutely adored, dance was her Everything, and by the time she hit high school, she started teaching classes at the studio she learned at in order to make some $$ that daniel wouldn’t take for his own

the older she got, the more she’d fight back a little against daniel and they had their fair share of fights ( which usually ended in daniel saying something to shut her down entirely and she’d scramble away ) but even despite that, sHE NEVER GAVE UP HOPE ON HIM...?? like, kaia always gave him the benefit of the doubt even though he’d proved himself time and time again thAT HE DIDN’T DESERVE IT

to her it was v black and white, she didn’t understand why tf he wouldn’t just get over himself and be a Family ( daniel is Where she gets her stubbornness tbh ) but despite having a little resent towards him, kaia never ever stopped hoping that he’d wake up one day and they’d start being a family and she still hasn’t bc optimist in the highest degree

when it came to college, kaia knew if she didn’t get out of chicago she was literally going to be sick, there was just smth about the loneliness there that made her skin crawl ( she also hates the winter now so she had to get as far away from snow as possible lmao ) and so she was like “alright i need a college on the west coast and w my dance major”, found crawford, and it was Settled

you ain’t getting my gossip blog secret out of me *wink*

anyways, now that the tragic backstory has been #unlocked...onto kaia

she’s the sanguine, which basically means bitch is a ball of sunshine, which she is — there’s no such thing as a stranger in her world, she likes constantly being surrounded by people ( bc she gotta make up for being lonely all those childhood years, thanks a ton dAN ) and making new friends and going out, she just loves people and people usually love her, she knows how to reel them in and keep them by her side, girlie will do Anything

she flat-out refuses to see the bad in people, even if it is staring her in the face, and this is where her stubborn nature comes in to play?? you can’t tell her anything, once her mind is set on something there is no hope of ever talking her out of it, she’s got to come to her senses on her own and even then it’s usually too late or she diminishes the impact of it?? she’s rash and got bad tunnel vision so it’s p clear where disaster lies w her

has the unhealthiest coping mechanisms on the history of the planet, tbh; she thinks the cure to everything is putting a smile on and acting like it’s not a problem and while that works when one fails a test, it doesn’t work w everything and she’s just forced so much pain and depression and anger down that it is Bound to come right back up at some point, so basically homegirl is a ticking time bomb

kaia’s also a people pleaser, she’d literally give you a kidney if you asked, which makes it easy for people to manipulate her?? and she doesn’t always see when she’s being manipulated either?? and won’t always stand up for herself when she’s being treated unfairly??? she just likes keeping the peace if at all possible

blurs the line a lot between doing things because she can and doing things because she feels an obligation to so she doesn’t let anyone down

ever since her parents died, she doesn’t like to give anything a second-guess — if she wants to do something, then she’s doing it, because it may not come back around again or she may not have the chance to. is the Definition of living in the moment, which is nice in theory, but kaia is v bad at compartmentalizing so it’s easy for her to get off track or ofc do things that will come back to bite her

dance is life, i’m not even gonna go into detail on it bc this is long enough already and like.....it’s just her whole world, ok, moving along

she wants everyone to let her in but she very rarely returns the favor, which is why i gave her the reticent trait?? she doesn’t tell people about her parents or her uncle, doesn’t let people see that iceberg of emotions underneath the surface, she acts like if it doesn’t exist then it doesn’t as far as anyone’s concerned???

girl is one of the greatest friends you could ever have but is a piece of work when you think about it, tbh, so that being said come love us !

and if you read this far: the reason this STUPID vine is my ooc tag is bc i have an ex named kyle who is a piece of trash and that vine is a p accurate description of how i feel about him.....plus it just makes me laugh ok going now

#「 •• 𝓸𝓯 𝓼𝓪𝓷𝓰𝓾𝓲𝓷𝓮𝓼 ; what the fuck is up red.#crwfrd.intro

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